EYP Relationships Rv41008

Welcome to Fruition, The show
that helps you to discover God’s

unique purpose for you, and
achieve through each of the five
areas of life: faith, health,
relationships, career and
finances.
Copyright Reid & Company, LLC 2002, 2008

The topic of today’s show is how
to incorporate your purpose into
the relationship area of your life.

Proverbs 16:4 says that The Lord
made all things for himself, even
the wicked for the day of evil.
Everything and everyone in
creation has a unique purpose
designed by the mind and hand
of God.

Purpose is the result or impact
you are meant to have on the
people or situations you come in
contact with or that come into
contact with the work of your
hands.

That being said, each relationship
you choose to have is meant to
achieve some godly purpose in
you and the one you are in
relationship with.

As we discuss relationship,
today, we are not speaking
simply of the people you know
of, but of those you are
connected or bonded to. Those
that know you and that you
know. People whose advice you
respect and accept, and those you
give advice to. Those you
depend on and those who depend
Relationships take many forms.
There are family relations,
spousal relations, parental
relations, close friendships,
acquaintances and work
relationships. Each one of these
relationships has a purpose in
your life.
We are all connected. Consider
the body of Christ. Ephesians
4:16 basically tells us that from
Christ which is the head, the rest
of the body is fitly joined
together and secured by every
joint supplying what it has been
apportioned or assigned to
provide. . .
And that by doing so, the body
grows, even as every part works
together in love. Paul basically
lets us know that the body of
Christ is properly built when
each joint is connected in the
right spot and supplies what it’s
supposed to supply.
This is precisely why knowing
your purpose and pursuing it is
so vitally important. Consider the
human body. Every joint, organ
and vessel is perfectly connected
allowing the blood to flow
throughout the entire system.
As the blood flows, it deposits
nutrients that keep the body alive.
Think it not strange that Christ is
the head and it is by the shedding
of His blood that we have the
opportunity to be saved. It is
through the blood of Christ that
we have life in Him and are
reconciled to God.
It is by the Holy Spirit that we
are instructed and inspired to
supply others and to be supplied
by others. When your life is not
focused on pursuing purpose you
interrupt the blood supply to the
body of Christ. Relationship is
the word we use to describe our
connections in the body.
Relationship is your being rightly
connected to the right parts, who
are, likewise, rightly connected to
other parts of the body. When
everything is properly connected,
life, that is the nutrients the blood
delivers, can circulate throughout
the entire system.
When the body is rightly joined
together, and every joint is doing
its part, then the spirit and
purposes of God can manifest,
uninterrupted. However,
damaged connections hinder the
flow, broken connections stop the
flow.
The natural body automatically
responds to broken or damaged
parts. The head immediately
notices that a part is in trouble
and it dispatches other body parts
to support it until it is healed or
until outside help arrives.

If you stump your toe, won’t
your hand quickly move to
comfort it? If you cut your
finger, won’t your other hand
apply pressure to prevent the loss
of blood, and then cleanse and
bandage it? Your brain is
constantly moving in rapid
motion to dispatch help to ailing
parts.
So it is in the body of
Christ. God immediately knows
of your trouble if you are
connected to Him, and He
immediately dispatches help to
you until you are restored.

You might say that does not
seem to be the case, or you may
have personal experience which
you may want to offer to dispute
this fact. What I said is true, but
here is the problem in the
manifestation.

Christ knows your pain and
struggles and signals other parts
of the body to come to your aid.
If the aid does not come quickly,
the issue is one of the following:

1. The parts that are supposed to
help have not positioned
themselves to respond.
God perfectly prepares each one
us to fulfill His purpose through
experiences He allows and
wisdom He imparts.

However, when we allow
ourselves to be distracted with
circumstances and fires that flare
up in our lives, we often miss
God nudging us to address His
needs which often involves the
needs of others.

This is in part, why we are to
trust the Lord with all our heart
and mind, and not lean to our
own understanding (Proverbs
3:5). The scripture also tells us
that in everything we are to give
thanks unto God for this is the
will of God in Christ Jesus
concerning each of us (I Thess.
5:18).
Your giving thanks in every
situation and circumstance is
your expression of faith. It is an
acknowledgement that God holds
all power and authority in His
hands, He has imparted that
power and authority to you by
His spirit and that the
circumstances you face are
controlled by God…
By giving thanks you
acknowledge that whatever
happens in your life is for your
good and your making as long as
you are a part of the body. This
acknowledgement should be
complemented by action that
prevents you from missing the
voice of God…
instead of worrying about the
issues that may be present in your
life. A mind stayed on God, and
not yourself, should keep you
from being self-absorbed either
with the lack of confidence or
arrogance, for these things
prevent God from circulating
healing and deliverance through
you.
2. The second thing that could
happen when it seems you don’t
receive immediate help from God
when you are in need is, The
parts of the body respond but you
don’t recognize or want to
receive the help that is being
offered.
Many times we look at our
circumstances and we mis-
diagnose what is happening.
Many of us get upset over what
we see going on with our natural
eyes instead of seeing the bigger
picture through our spiritual eyes.

Because we mis-diagnose, we
pre-suppose what the solution
should be so that when we pray
we ask God for the cure that we
want instead of the cure He
already knows we need.

Because God loves us and has
patience with us He provides the
cure we need instead of what we
want. As it is when we deal with
our own children, we sometimes
get upset at His solution or we
think He did not answer us,
leading us to feel as though He
doesn’t care for us or hear us
when we call.
The solution here is the same.
By keeping your mind on God
and remaining prayerful through
difficult times, you will better
recognize God’s answers to your
dilemmas.

If you don’t do so now, when a
troubling situation arises, practice
going immediately to God first.
Not to the telephone to call a
friend or complaining to the
closest body you can find. Step
back and ask God, “What is this
situation all about?” and He will
give you the peace and direction
to deal with it appropriately.
3. The third thing that can happen
when you need help but don’t
seem to get it right away is that,
the responding parts are sitting in
judgment instead of aiding the
ailing parts.

God is always directing our every
step. He leads us to be in certain
places at given times and to do
certain things when we get there.
Strangely, though, when some of
us see a brother or sister caught
in a fault we think twice about
whether or not to help them.
Some of us move forward to
help, but instead of letting God
give us the words to say that
might comfort, edify or exhort
them, we speak to them instead
from our storage of religious
legalism. So that what you
thought was going to help has
actually just hurt and
discouraged.
Think about it. How many times
have you seen people come to
church for deliverance, accept
salvation, attend service a few
times and then you never see
them again? Many of us just
assume that they weren’t serious
about making a commitment to
God or that
they rejected you and your
church because of a greater
desire to be in their former
situation. The truth of the matter
is that in their minds, the church
rejected them. It’s not only
important to make someone feel
welcome when they come to your
ministry (remember they are not
there by accident or chance),
But it is vitally important that
that person feels wanted first of
all by God, and then by you.
Your motives toward them need
to be pure. Your desire for them
should be to help them become
reconciled to God.
Your approach should always be
one of love and compassion, not
of condemnation. Matthew 7:1-
5. This familiar scripture tells us
to judge not lest we be judged by
the same measure. So what is
judgment? It is a criticism or
formed opinion

We can’t be quick to categorize
others. We have been trained to
put people into boxes. With most
relationships we want to say this
person is like this or that, or we
want to look at their background
and their current state and say
they belong in this box with
everyone else like “this”.
But God created unique
individuals to work in His
vineyard called the earth. No
two grapes are ever the same. So
what you might say to encourage
one may greatly discourage
another. This is what I love
about Matthew 7:3 which says,
Why are you looking at the speck
of dust in your brother’s eye
when you have a large plank in
your own? This particular verse
makes it plain that yes your
brother may be caught in a fault,
but your judgment of him is far
worse than the sin he may be
committing.
Why is this the case?
Remember, the overall purpose
of God is to have his people
reconciled back to Him through
Christ. That reconciliation
happens through the building up
of the body of Christ. And the
body is built up by the laborers
who are bringing in the harvest.
God is fiercely protective of His
purpose in you and in those that
have yet to be reconciled to Him.
God goes through the careful
strategic effort of putting people
through the experiences of life
that leads them to the place
where they decide after suffering
enough brokeness, confusion,
and/or strife that her rightful
place is in Christ. They come to
you or your ministry for help.
They did not come for you, but
they came because they thought
you could help them find God.
So God gets them to you,
because He trusts you to wisely
win their soul to Christ,
He trusts you to tell them how to
be reconciled to Him through
Christ. But when they get to you,
you don’t share the love of God
with them. Instead, you want to
know all about their past
mistakes, and

then remind them how bad their
past was and how bad they are
for having “wasted” so much
time in sin, and how they now
need to go through your ten steps
for being truly accepted and
loved by God.

Then they turn around and watch
your lifestyle and your
conversation with others, then
they observe who’s in the “in-
crowd” and who’s not,

and just about the time they
realize that they are not a part of
the “in-crowd” and will probably
never be is when you start seeing
less and less of them until they
go back to where they came
from.

And so now, instead of helping
another lost soul find their proper
position in the body, you have
actually helped to throw them out
of the body. You have actually
worked against the ultimate
purpose of God.

There is a reason, Christ refers to
the lost souls as a harvest. If
you’ve ever picked fruits or
vegetables, you know that you
have to handle the fruit carefully.
If you rip it off the branch, beat
it down with a stick or squeeze it
too tightly, you will bruise it.
God wants us to handle lost souls
with the greatest of care so that
once they’re picked they can be
put to His good use.

Did you not know the harvest has
multiple purposes? The first is so
that the lost soul can find its
place in the body of Christ. the
second is so that you as the
laborer win a favorable decision
in the court of heaven concerning
your petitions.
the enemy stands before God and
accuses you, telling Him that you
are not worthy of being blessed
because you won’t obey God.
But Christ is ever before God
saying, give them another
chance.

So now, God hands down a
decision which is in effect a
delay of your desire. You get
another chance to do it right, but
your blessings are held up.
Because He loves you, He
doesn’t destroy you, but He lets
you experience things that drive
you straight to your knees.
This is what drives you to your
knees. You pray for things and
don’t get them, you confess
things and your testimony gets
muddied because it does not
come to pass. You say God can
and God will but no one, not
even you can see the
manifestation of it.
All because the devil used your
“witness” to prove that your
motives are not pure, that is
aligned with God’s purpose.
Why do you think the enemy

fights you and not the sinner?
Because he knows that if he can
mess up the conduit to Christ,
being you as the laborer, the
harvest will dry up and sour on
the vine, and eventually fall
away. If he spent all his time on
the sinner, the saints would grow
strong enough to defeat him
every time.
But if he can mislead some of the
saints, weaken their faith or puff
them up so that they judge
instead of producing healing, he
can keep more lost souls and gain
some of the saints as well.
Judging others is one of the worst
things you could ever do. It’s
better to keep silent, and it’s best
to pray.
If things are not going like you
planned, the first question to ask
is, “God, is it me?” and be open
to hear His answer. Sometimes it
will be no, but sometimes He
may just bring a moment or
circumstance to your
remembrance.
Ask Him for understanding of
what you should have done
differently, and repent of your
wrong. That means, don’t do it
again. Being able to converse
honestly, reverently and
consistently with God, and being
open to receive whatever He says
is the very essence of good
relationship with Him.
So, when you are called to
support a broken or damaged part
of the body, do you do it in love
or must you first judge the
broken part? These now are
saints who are already a part of
the body, but are facing some
obvious and visible issues.
Our connection in the body of
Christ is such that if the broken
part is not fixed, it will
eventually impact the entire body
in some way. Remember, Paul
taught us that the body builds
itself up in love, not judgment.
Judgment tears down.
The harvest of souls is those that
have a place in the body but are
not in position yet. These are
those that are currently living in
sin. Each of us has some role
through our purpose in helping to
get those parts in place, and in
helping to keep those that are
already in place, the saints, in
good working condition.
Every relationship you choose to
have should have a purpose that
you are aware of. Once you
know your purpose, you can
judge your relationships by
whether or not they fit with what
it is you know you are to do with
your life.
Your relationships can supply
you with the information and
encouragement to accomplish
your purpose. They are often the
doors to experiences that sharpen
and build in you the knowledge
and maturity needed for your
purpose.
Finally, as I have already
implied, your relationships are
often the targets of your purpose,
as God positions you to provide
value, encouragement,
knowledge and support to others.

But how can you rightly evaluate
whether or not you are to be in
certain relationships? The first
and most important step is having
a secure, not just a passing,
relationship with God. Because
from this relationship flows the
wisdom to have and to manage
every other relationship in your
life.
From God, and only God, flows
the wisdom to know what a
particular relationship is for,
what type of relationship it
should be, how long you should
be in it and whether or not you
should be in it at all.
When you have a heart submitted
and committed to God, and when
God has your ear and can reach
you at any time and in the midst
of any circumstance, When He
can trust you to obey Him when
He speaks, then you will be in the
perfect position to judge the
rightness of your relationships.
Until you get into this position,
you should wear your
relationships lightly. In other
words, don’t come into covenant,
which is strong and lasting
commitment, with anyone, unless
you know what your purpose is
and how that person fits into it.
This is because once you know
your God-given purpose, it may
require that you to shift out of
some relationships and join in
covenant with others that are not
compatible with relationships
you may already have.
If you have strong emotional or
soul-ties with people you are not
supposed to be in covenant with,
you may suffer great emotional
conflict between what you know
God wants you to do and what
your flesh or soul man wants you
to keep.
Because time is of the essence in
the kingdom of God right now,
you don’t want to waste valuable
time trying to decide whether or
not to obey God in letting go of
some of the people in your life,
or spend valuable time trying to
get over having to let them go.
Well, this is all fine if we all are
starting with a clean slate. But
since we are not, we need to
know how to transition from a
“wrong” relationship into right
relationship with as minimal an
impact as possible.

It takes a mind open to receive
the word of God to understand
His purpose in relationships.
Matthew 9:9-13 tells us how
Jesus joined Himself to Matthew.
Out of His relationship with
Matthew, He went to His house
for dinner.

But because Matthew was
already connected to tax
collectors and sinners, Jesus and
the disciples He was connected to
found themselves at dinner with
the sinners that Matthew was
connected to.

Outside religious observers
judged the circumstance wrongly,
criticizing Jesus for associating
Himself with sinners. But Jesus
let them know that it was not the
healthy but the sick that needed a
physician, then He told them to
step off and go learn what it
meant in Hosea 6:6 when God
said I desire mercy not sacrifice.
What He was saying was God
desires a person with a right heart
towards Him and not religious
sacrifices which can be done
outwardly without a sincere
heart.

Finally, in this passage Jesus
said, that He came not to call the
righteous but rather sinners to
repentance. You see, the
Pharisees felt they had already
arrived. And those that had
arrived should not associate with
those, who in their minds, could
never be as “righteous” as they.
But Jesus always stayed focused
on purpose. He knew the job had
only just begun and that this life
was not to be compared to life in
Him after the resurrection. So it
did not matter to Him how others
criticized His actions, because He
knew they did not understand His
purpose.
Even if He wanted to be moved
by their criticism, He would not.
Because He recognized who God
really is and His responsibility to
God according to His covenant
and high relationship with Him.

The weight of His responsibility
to His relationship with God far
outweighed any loss of
credibility with people who were
too puffed up and arrogant to
change anyway. Ahh, if we all
could be like Jesus.

Many times we stay away from
people we should connect with
because we feel their sinful ways
will contaminate us. If that is a
legitimate concern you have, then
you know you have a lot more
relationship building with God to
do so that you can be strong
enough to effectively witness to
those in need.
There are people on your job
today, who you are supposed to
be an effective witness to but
you’re losing that battle because
you can’t hold a basic casual
conversation with them for being
so holy and afraid.

But yet you wonder why you are
stagnant in the same job working
with the same people you just
can’t stand to work with. When
you learn how to be a wise
witness your life will be more
peaceful and satisfying
The first part of that is living the
life you say you are to live. And
as Jesus told the disciples it’s not
about your religious sacrifices
and performances but it’s about
exhibiting the heart and character
of God towards everyone. Many
of us have no real experience
with this because we are too busy
keeping the sacrifices burning.
So our witness, gets tainted and
nothing about our life looks
attractive to the sinners we are
around. The second part of
having an effective witness is
being touchable. You can’t shun
the kindness or friendship of
sinners.
If you know your purpose, and
keep purpose in mind you should
look for opportunities to share
the love of Christ with others
without condemning,
intimidating or repulsing your
hearers. He who wins souls is
wise. Proverbs 11:30

So, how do you evaluate the
rightness of your relationships
with both the people in the body
of Christ and with those that have
the potential to be in the body?
As I said earlier, you have to first
have a right relationship with
God.
Once that covenant relationship
is in place with Him, then you
can rightly judge your other
relationships. When evaluating
your relationships one of the key
questions to ask yourself is
whether or not that relationship
threatens your relationship with
God.
Amos 3:1-3 says can two walk
together except they be agreed?
This means of the same heart and
similar motive and with
complimentary purposes. The
question is raised in this passage
because the Israelites have begun
to serve other gods and pursue
their own desires.
God lets them know that of all
the families of the earth, He
chose to make a covenant with
them. He reminds them that He
kept His part of the covenant, but
they did not keep theirs. All they
had to do was serve Him only
and follow His decrees.
But instead they connected
themselves with foul, unholy and
lifeless gods. Because there is
circulation when there is
connection and God will not
contaminate Himself, God, in His
anger cuts them off. That’s why
He rhetorically says two can’t
walk together if they don’t agree.
This new connection threatened
the very purpose of God through
Israel. Since they came out of
agreement, God severes their
connection and leaves them open
to disaster. Today, if you truly
have a heart for God and you are
in a relationship that threatens
His purpose through you,
You can count that relationship
as good as gone. Especially at
this time in the earth, God is
shaking out the junk and pulling
His people out of relationships
that are distracting them from
purpose.

It’s better if you stop and take
some time here in the near future
to evaluate every relationship that
you have. Prayerfully consider
whether or not that relationship is
assisting you in purpose or
working to destroy God’s
purpose through you.
Another way to evaluate your
relationships is to look at the
circulation or flow between you
and the other person. In a
covenant relationship both parties
agree to supply and receive from
each other towards building each
other up.

But if one does all the supplying
and never receives anything
beneficial from the other, the
agreement has been breached and
the covenant is ineffective. More
obvious is when one person is
obviously receiving great benefit
and the other person is actually
weakened through the
relationship.
The bottom line is we need to
guard the purposes that God has
put in us. Wrong relationships,
whether they be with people
inside the body or out, threaten
your purpose. God has invested
time and resources to make you
ready for His purpose.
Don’t throw it away on worthless
and temporary pleasures, which
work against His plans. Solomon
is a great example. He started
out right. He had a heart for the
things of God and fulfilled the
word of God by building the
temple.
But slowly, over time, he was
deceived and pulled away by one
thing. Wrong relationship. His
desire for “strange” women as
the Bible calls them, caused Him
to break His end of the covenant
with God because these women
led him to start serving false gods
and practicing abominable
practices.
Again, because of the circulation
involved in covenant, God had to
disassociate Himself from
Solomon. But because Solomon
was the head, His sin, rooted in
wrong relationship, adversely
affected everyone He was
connected to which was the
entire kingdom of Israel.
This is why you, as a believer,
can’t come into covenant with
just anybody and you can’t lay
your hands on just anything,
whether it seems to be of God or
not. When you do, it is
imperative that you repent,
meaning to turn away and not do
it again, so that you will not lose
your secure position with Christ
and so that your purpose will not
be thwarted.

So, what do you do if you find
that you are already in wrong
relationships? How do you get
out of them? The way to get out
of them with the least amount of
pain is to ask God for His divine
guidance in cutting off those
things you recognize are not of
Him and that go against His
purpose in your life.
It sounds simple, but it works.
Your willingness to align your
will with the will of God makes
life a lot easier for you. He
supports those who have a heart
for Him and are willing to work
with their hands. God will go out
of His way to make severing
those relationships easy,
if He knows you’re doing it to
please Him. You have to be
determined enough to say no to
continuing the bad relationship,
and God works to make sure the
response to your no is received
with little to no negative impact
on you. The key thing is
knowing His timing and His
approach. Pray for wisdom.
But you have to make up your
mind to let it go. Better you
decide to move forward than to
have God yank you forward.

In summary, everyone is a joint.
There are joints that are currently
out of position that must be
properly guided into the right
position. And there are those that
are in the right position but need
to be fortified or repaired.

God flows through the body from
heart to heart as each part
supplies its fruit and thus fulfills
its purpose. Having right
relationships is vitally important.
Ensure you have the right
relationships not just the
traditional or expected ones.
Examine yourself, know your
purpose and how each
relationship in your life fits with
your purpose. This includes,
family, spousal, work and what’s
called “casual” relationships.

Right relationships supply you
with what you need to pursue
your purpose and allow you to
supply them towards fulfilling
your purpose. Wrong
relationships threaten your
relationship with God,
so evaluate your relationships
today and make sure you are
found in the will of God.
Join us next time as we talk about
how to incorporate your purpose
into the career area of your life.
Until then, be blessed and may
you prosper in all things
according to your purpose in
God.

EYP Relationships Rv41008

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Welcome to Fruition, The show

that helps you to discover God’s

Copyright Reid & Company, LLC 2002, 2008

Copyright Reid & Company, LLC 2002, 2008

Copyright Reid & Company, LLC 2002, 2008

Copyright Reid & Company, LLC 2002, 2008

Copyright Reid & Company, LLC 2002, 2008

Copyright Reid & Company, LLC 2002, 2008

Copyright Reid & Company, LLC 2002, 2008

Copyright Reid & Company, LLC 2002, 2008

Copyright Reid & Company, LLC 2002, 2008

Copyright Reid & Company, LLC 2002, 2008

Copyright Reid & Company, LLC 2002, 2008

Copyright Reid & Company, LLC 2002, 2008

Copyright Reid & Company, LLC 2002, 2008

Copyright Reid & Company, LLC 2002, 2008

Copyright Reid & Company, LLC 2002, 2008

Copyright Reid & Company, LLC 2002, 2008

Copyright Reid & Company, LLC 2002, 2008

Copyright Reid & Company, LLC 2002, 2008

Copyright Reid & Company, LLC 2002, 2008

Copyright Reid & Company, LLC 2002, 2008

Copyright Reid & Company, LLC 2002, 2008

Copyright Reid & Company, LLC 2002, 2008

Copyright Reid & Company, LLC 2002, 2008

Why do you think the enemy

Copyright Reid & Company, LLC 2002, 2008

Copyright Reid & Company, LLC 2002, 2008

Copyright Reid & Company, LLC 2002, 2008

Copyright Reid & Company, LLC 2002, 2008

Copyright Reid & Company, LLC 2002, 2008

Copyright Reid & Company, LLC 2002, 2008

Copyright Reid & Company, LLC 2002, 2008

Copyright Reid & Company, LLC 2002, 2008

Copyright Reid & Company, LLC 2002, 2008

Copyright Reid & Company, LLC 2002, 2008

Copyright Reid & Company, LLC 2002, 2008

Copyright Reid & Company, LLC 2002, 2008

Copyright Reid & Company, LLC 2002, 2008

Copyright Reid & Company, LLC 2002, 2008

Copyright Reid & Company, LLC 2002, 2008

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