Technical and Business Writing

In English: Some Guidelines on Usage

1. Verbs

Major tense distinctions in technical writing

Exercise: Fill in the blanks with the most appropriate
form of verbs.
1. A small protein molecule _______ (have) a molecular
weight of about 10,000.
2. Five hundred pounds ______ (be) the maximum
weight that this rope can support.
3. An astronomer _______ (observe) the universe
through optical and radio telescope.

The simple present tense

In formal technical writing, the simple present
tense is used primarily to express
timeless generalization, i.e., general statements
which do not specify any particular time
frame.
Example:

Water boils at 373 K.

I recommend that we continue to use the

IBM computers.
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The simple present tense

Even for events that occurred in the past, the simple
present tense can be used occasionally to indicate a
generalization or fact that is not restricted to the past or to
the future.
Example:
The blood test was carried out last week. And the result
proves that the suspect is innocent.
The study shows that there is a potential market in
Malaysia.
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The present continuous tense

The present continuous tense is used to describe actions that are
actually taking place at the present time and are temporary.
Example:
The sun is shining. (at this moment, temporarily)
The newlyweds are living with her parents. (at the present time,
temporarily)
She is smoking. (Shes smoking a cigarette at this moment.)
Compare the meaning of the sentences above with the meaning of
these sentences with verbs in the simple present tense:
The sun shines 360 days a year in Malaysia. (habitual action,
every day)
The newlyweds live with her parents. (permanently)
She smokes. (Its her habit.)
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Exercise: Use the correct verb tenses in the following paragraph.

The Computer Revolution

Technology brings problems as well as benefits to
humankind. Since Henry Ford ______(begin) massproducing automobiles in 1908, they _______ (provide)
us with a cheap and convenient means of transportation.
However, they _______ (also bring) us traffic jams and
air pollution. A technological development that ______
(change) our lives as much as the automobiles is the
personal computer. Since the 1980s, personal computers
_______ (become) common in houses, schools, and
businesses, and just as automobiles ________ (bring)
unexpected problems, so _______ (have) personal
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computers.

Exercise: Use the correct verb tenses in the following paragraph.

In addition to problems in communication, computer

_______ (also cause) problems in business. They ______
(create) excellent opportunities for computerized crime.
Computer hackers ______ (use) their skills to obtain
secret business information and to steal money. In
addition, banks ______ (worry) that hackers ______
(learn) how to transfer money out of customers account
into their own. So far, we ______ (are able) to stay one
step ahead of the hackers in this particular game, said a
bank spokesperson, but security ______ (be) never one
hundred percent in any business.
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The present perfect tense links the past with

the present. Use it when the action began in the
past and is still continuing in the present or when it
is important in some way to the present in the mind
of the speakers.
Example:
The computer age has improved our lives in
numerous ways.
(This action began in the past and is still
happening.)
I have never used a computer.
(, but I might still not use one.)
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The present perfect is also frequently used for repeated actions in

the past.
Example:
There have been several cases of credit card theft via computer.
(Repeated action in the past.)
The time words since and yet require the present perfect tense.
When since is a subordinate, use the present perfect in the
independent clause (not in the dependent clause that starts with
since.
Example:
Since Henry Ford began mass-producing automobiles in 1908, they
have provided us with a cheap and convenient means of
transportation.
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When since is a preposition, use the present perfect in the same

clause.
Example:
Since the 1980s, personal computer have become common in
homes, schools, and businesses.
Also, use the present perfect in any clause when yet is a time
word. Do not confuse the time word yet with the coordinating
conjunction yet.
Example:
Time word:
The lack of censorship in cyberspace is another problem that no
one has solved yet.
Coordinating conjunction:
Computers are useful tools, yet they can cause many problems.
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Present perfect vs. Simple past tense

The simple past tense is the verb form used for an
action that began in the past and was completed in
the past. The present perfect is used for an action
that began in the past but is still happening or is
still influencing the present. For example, in the
review of a technical report, single isolated studies
are usually referred to in the simple past tense.
Example:
Newton found that
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Whereas multiple studies, suggesting an on-going

sequence of studies, are usually referred to in the
present perfect tense.
Example:
Pierce et al., and other researchers have reported that
Simple Past
I lived in Hawaii for three years.
(I dont live there now.)
Present Perfect
I have lived in Hawaii for three years.
(I moved there three years ago, and I am still living
there.)
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Exercise:
1. Theoretical science began when the Greeks ______
(start) to ask question about things
_____ (make) of and where they ______ (come) from.
2. Ptolemy believed that the sun _____ (revolve) around
the sun.
3. Ptolemy did not realize that the earth ______ (revolve)
around the sun.
4. Vesalius named every bone, every muscle, and most of
the blood vessels in the human
body, but he did not know how the body ______
(function).
5. Johannes Kepler was the first to show how a planet
______ (move).
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6. Before the discovery of oxygen, many scientists thought that

when a substance _____(burn), its phlogiston ______
(escape) into the air.
7. Jules Verne, a nineteenth-century science-fiction writer,
imagined that a rocketship ______ (can fly) from the earth to
the moon.
8. When mendels 1866 report ______ (rediscover) in 1900,
biologists found that Mendel _____ (make) many important
discoveries concerning heredity.
9. Chairman Eijkman demonstrated that a shortage of Vitamin B1
over a long time _____(can cause) the nerve disease called
beriberi.
10. Hideki Yukawa proposed a theory that _______ (account for)
the type and magnitude of forces that _____ (hold) the atomic
nucleus together.
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2. Common errors in sentence structure

A. Sentence fragments
Sentence fragments are incomplete sentences or parts of
sentences. Remember that a complete sentence must
contain at least one main or independent clause.
Example:
1. Because some students have part-time jobs in addition
to going to school.
Problem:
This is a subordinate clause.
To correct:
Attach it to an independent clause.
Complete sentence:
Because some students have part-time jobs in addition
to full-time class work, they have very little free time.
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3. Common errors in sentence structure

A. Sentence fragments
2. For example, the increase in the cost of renting
an apartment.
Problem:
No main verb.
To correct: Rewrite the sentence so that it has a
subject and a verb.
Complete sentence:
For example, the cost of renting an apartment
has increased.
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3. Having no money and being lonely in the big

city.
Problem:
This is a participial phrase. It has
no subject or verb.
To correct: (a) Rewrite the phrase to include a
subject and a verb.
(b) Attach the phrase to an independent
clause.
Complete sentence:
(a) She had no money and was lonely in the big
city.
(b) Having no money and being lonely in the big
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city, the woman committed
suicide.

4. Many people who get married before they are

mature enough.
Problem:
This is a noun followed by a
dependent (adjective) clause.
To correct: Rewrite the clause by eliminating the
adjective clause aspect.
Complete sentence:
Many people get married before they are
mature enough.

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Always check your own writing for

sentence fragments! Pay particular
attention to your sentences beginning
with subordinating conjunctions
(although, since, because, if, before, etc.).
These are DANGER WORDS! Make
sure that every subordinate clause
beginning with these words is attached to
an independent clause.
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Exercise: Rewrite the following sentences to

eliminate sentence fragments.
1.Second, the fact that men are physically stronger
than women.
2.For example, many students have part-time jobs.
3.Although people want to believe that all men are
created equal.
4.Many of my friends who did not have the
opportunity to go to college.

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B. Choppy sentences.
Choppy sentences are sentences that are too short.
They are the result of using too many simple
sentences.
Choppy:
We must find new sources of energy. The
earths natural sources of energy are dwindling. Solar
energy is a promising new source of energy. Solar
energy is energy from the suns radiation.
Choppy:
Government and industry are spending huge
sums of money to develop solar energy. Research
scientists are working hard to develop economical
means of converting the suns ray into usable energy.
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B.Choppy sentences.
Choppy sentences are easy to correct. Just
combine two or three simple sentences to
make one compound or complex
sentence. Your decision to make a
compound or a
complex sentence should be based on
whether the ideas in the simple sentences
are equal or whether one sentence is
dependent on the other.
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B. Choppy sentences.
1. If the simple sentences are equal, make a
compound sentence, using a coordinating
conjunction (and, or, but, so, yet, nor, for FAN
BOYS) or a conjunctive adverb (moreover,
otherwise, however, therefore, etc.)
2. If one sentence depends on the other, make a
complex sentence, using a subordinating
conjunction (who, which, when, although,
because, since, if, etc.)
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Compound: Government and industry are

spending huge sums of money to develop solar
energy, and research scientists are working
hard to develop economical means of
converting the suns rays into usable energy.
Complex: We must find new sources of energy
because the earths natural energy are
dwindling. Solar energy, which is energy from
the suns radiation, is a promising new source
of energy.
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C. Run-On sentences and comma splices

A run-on sentence is a sentence in which two or
more independent clauses are written one after another
with no punctuation. A similar error happens when
two independent clauses are incorrectly joined by a
comma without a coordinating conjunction.
This kind of error is also called a comma splice.
Run-on: Getting married is easy staying married is a
different matter.
Comma Splice: San Francisco is a very cosmopolitan
city, there are people from many cultures and ethnic
groups living there.
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C. Run-On sentences and comma splices

A comma splice alone cannot join two independent clauses.
A run-on/comma splice sentence can be corrected by adding:
1. a period:
Getting married is easy. Staying married is a different matter.
2. a semicolon:
Getting married is easy; staying married is a different story.
3. a coordinating conjunction:
Getting married is easy, but staying married is a different story.
4. a subordinating conjunction:
Although getting married is easy, staying married is a different
story.

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Exercise: Correct the following run-on/comma splice sentences using the method
indicated.
1.
2.

3.
4.
5.

A foreign student faces many problems for example he has to cope with a new culture.
(a) (Add a period.) _____________________________________________________.
(b) (Add a semicolon.) __________________________________________________.
San Francisco is a very cosmopolitan city, there are people from many cultures and
ethnic groups living there.
(a) (Add a period.) _____________________________________________________.
(b) (Add a semicolon.) __________________________________________________.
(Add a subordinating conjunction.) ______________________________________.
(d) (Add a coordinating conjunction.) ______________________________________.
Learning a new language is like learning to swim it takes a lot of practice.
(Add a coordinating conjunction.) _________________________________________.
Ask for assistance at the reference desk in the library, there is always a librarian on
duty.
(Add a semicolon.) _____________________________________________________.
Hang-gliding is a dangerous sport you can easily break your leg.
(Add a subordinating conjunction.) ________________________________________.

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D. Stringy sentences
Another type of problem that students sometimes
create is the stringy sentence. This is a sentence with
too many clauses usually connected with and, but, so,
and because, forming one very long sentence. The
result is a sentence that seems endless.
Stringy Sentence: Many students attend classes all
morning and they work all afternoon and then they
have to study at night so they are usually exhausted by
the weekend.

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D.

Stringy sentences

There are several ways to correct a stringy sentence:

Divide:
Many students attend classes all morning and work all
afternoon. Then, they have to study at night. As a
result, they are usually exhausted by the weekend.
Subordinate:
Many student, after they attend classes all morning, also
work in the afternoon. Because they also have to study
at night, they are usually exhausted by the weekend.
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Exercise: Improve these stringy sentences. Use any

method or combination of methods.
1. He enrolled in an advanced calculus class, but he found
it too difficult, so he dropped it.
2. The tidal wave ruined the crops, and it destroyed
several villages, and it caused many deaths, so it was a
real disaster.
3. The analysts works many hours on the computer
program, but they couldnt find the cause of the
problem, so they finally gave up, and they went home.
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E. Use the active and passive voices appropriately

F. The active voice focuses on the performer of the
action, whereas the passive voice focuses on the
recipient of the action. In general, the active voice is
preferable. The active voice is always more concise
than the passive voice. But the passive voice is
superior to the active voice in four cases:
1. when the performer of the action is clearly understood
Attendees are required to register for the conference by
July 15.
(It is perfectly clear who is doing the requirement: the
conference organizers.)
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E. Use the active and passive voices appropriately

2. when the performer of the action is unknown
The comet was first described in an ancient Egyptian
manuscript.
(We dont know who wrote the manuscript.)
3. when the performer of the action is unimportant
The materials for the next set of experiments were ordered in
March.
(It doesnt matter who ordered them.)
4. when a reference to the performer of the action would be
embarrassing, dangerous, or in some other way
inappropriate
Incorrect data were released to the press about the companys
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toxic emission.
(Your boss did it.)

F. Focus on the real subject

Make sure the subject of the sentence what you are
writing about is clear and emphatic. Dont hide the
subject in a prepositional phrase.
(weak):
The purchase of the new robot would improve
quality control.
(strong):
The new robot would improve quality control.
(weak):
The presence of the unidentified gene was
detected last week.
(strong):
The unidentified gene was detected last week.
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F. Focus on the real subject

A second way to focus on the real subject of the
sentence is to cut down on the use of expletives.
The constructions it is, there is, and there are,
as well as related forms of the to be verb often
can be removed without eliminating any useful
information.
(weak): There are many factors that led to the
motor damages.
(strong): Many factors led to the motor damage.

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G. Focus on the real verb

Sometimes writers sap the strength of their sentences
by turning their verbs into nouns.
Once the original verb is changed into a noun, the writer
has to create a new verb. The
new verb is almost always a disappointment.
(weak):
(strong):

An analysis of the sample was undertaken.

The sample was analyzed.

(weak):
An investigation of the different options was
performed.
(strong):
The different options were investigated.
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H.Use modifying elements effectively

A restrictive modifier restricts the meaning of
the word or phrase to which it refers. In
other words, it identifies it by providing crucial
information.

The missile in the museum exhibits are exact

replicas of the originals.

Please pay particular attention to the

instructions in Part III.
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H.Use modifying elements effectively

A nonrestrictive modifier, on the other hand,
just provides extra information about what it
refers to. It does not provide crucial,
identifying information.

The first mass-produced electric car, the

Chevrolet Impact, was released in 1994.

As you leave, stop by the registration area,

which is located in the main lobby.
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There are two common problems with modifiers:

misplaced modifiers and dangling modifiers.
1. A misplaced modifier is one that modifies the wrong
part of the sentence. In general, keep the modifier
near the element it modifies.
(misplaced): The topic of the meeting is the future of
hydroelectric energy in the Red Lion Hotel.
(correct):The topic of the meeting in the Red Lion Hotel is
the future of hydroelectric energy.

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2. A dangling modifier does not refer to anything in the

sentence.
(dangling): Analyzing the test report, the data sheet
looked incorrect.
(The sentence doesnt state who is doing the analyzing.)
(correct):As I was analyzing the test report, the data sheet
looked incorrect.
(correct):Analyzing the test report, I thought the data
sheet looked incorrect.
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I. Keep parallel items parallel

Here are some common kinds of parallelism
problems:
1. unparallel voice: Place the new board in the
slot. Then, the board should be pushed in
gently until it clicks into place.
parallel voice: Place the new board in the slot.
Then, push the board in gently until it clicks
into place.
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2. unparallel mood: The operator should follow the

instructions in Part 2. Do not change the pin setting.
parallel mood: Follow the instructions in Part 2.
Do not change the pin setting.
3. unparallel enumeration:
First, be sure to checkSecond, align the
electrodesThen, cap the electrodes
parallel enumeration:
First, be sure to checkSecond, align the
electrodesThird, cap the electrodes
41

B. Be specific. Avoid vague words that can

be misunderstood.
Dont say office equipment if you mean a
personal computer.

42

C. Keep your sentences relatively short. Longer

sentences discourage many readers. One
recommendation is that your sentences should
average seventeen words. That doesnt mean, of
course, that seventeen words is the ideal length.
To communicate effectively, you should vary the
length of your sentences.

43

D. Make paragraphs no more than six lines

long. With longer paragraphs, many readers will
read the first and last few lines and skim or simply
skip everything in between. Tight writing invites
the reader to continue. Think about breaking up
big chunks of text with headlines or lists.

44

Revising
Think of this stage of the writing process as quality
assurance at a macro level. You need to make sure that
the results of your writing achieve the intended purpose(s)
as effectively as possible.
Try to read your writing from the perspective of
your reader. You might even want to sit in a different
chair and to read your words aloud. Youll find out if
your copy is conversational and natural. Also, mistakes
are more likely to stand out. If you used a computer, you
should print out a copy and read your words from the
paper, as your reader will be reading them.
45

At this stage, look at the major pieces of

text. Do they all belong? Are they in the
most effective order? Do you use paragraphs
or sentences that dont add anything to your
message, or any words or phrases you dont
need? Are you using any long words when
shorter words would express just as well? If
you receive the piece, would you read it?
Does it invite the reader?
46

Editing
When you edit your writing, youre checking it
over for accuracy, grammar, spelling, and punctuation.
You may want to have someone else edit your writing
(after youre done your best). If thats not an option, you
can try the old trick of reading the paragraphs in reverse
order. Reading your work from finish to start may disrupt
the flow of your words enough for you to catch some
errors.
A final word of advice here: dont trust your
computer. Those tools that check grammar and spelling
are very helpful. But theyre limited, because human
language is simply too complex for machines (at least for
47
now).

Mistakes your computer wont catch

Revert back. Revert means to go back or
to return. Eliminate back.
I could care less. Thats wrong, because it
means you care a lot. It should be I
couldnt care less. Think about it.
New innovation. An innovation is something
new, so drop the adjective.

48

The principle reason. The adjective should be

principal, meaning the most important.
8 p.m. tonight. Because p.m. means after noon
and a.m. , means before noon, we dont need
to use qualifiers such as tonight or in the
morning when were using those Latin
abbreviations.
This will effect my job status. The verb should be
affect, which means to influence or to
produce an effect upon. The verb effect
means to bring about.
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Be clear, economical, straightforward, and

professional.
Which of the following two paragraphs would you
rather read?
1. In order to ensure that the process of recording calls
by work order number is properly operational, it is
necessary to purge the work order assignments and
related two-digit account code assignments for each
telephone extension and update the system to include
only those work order numbers for active client
projects.
2. Use only active client work order numbers (and their
two-digit account codes) to record calls. Purge
inactive work order numbers and their account codes.
50

Sometimes writers try to impress, not

express. When we use words to impress our
audience, we may lose them by writing at a high
fog index. When we write to express, we focus
our attention on the reader, not on ourselves, and
on making our writing readable.
What does readable mean? How do you
make your writing readable? Readability is the
result of many factors. The three most important
are clarity, economy, and straightforwardness.

51

Clear writing conveys meaning without

ambiguity. To write well in business, you must
make sure that the reader at least understand you.
Economical writing uses no more words than
necessary. Thats one of the distinguishing marks
of clear and forceful writing. To write well in
business, you must make sure not to waste the
readers time and energy.
Straightforward writing puts words in a
natural expected order, such as placing the subject
close to the verb for easy understanding. To write
well in business, you must make it easy for the
52
reader to know what you mean.

Clarity
If your message has more than one meaning,
its not clear. Dont use long words where short
ones will do; it makes your writing dense and
difficult to understand. Use precise words and
phrasings to make your writing clear. Make sure
the words you choose have the right meaning and
dont allow for misinterpretation. For example,
dont use the vague term health organization when
you mean the American Red Cross.

53

Economy
When it comes to words, more is not usually better. When
you use too many words, you may lose the reader or at least
make the reader lose interest. Take the following paragraph, for
example.
For the purposes of this policy, sexual harassment may
be defined as unsolicited nonreciprocal behavior by an employee
who is in a position to control or affect another employees job or
who uses the power or authority of that position to cause that
employee to submit to sexual activity or to fear that he or she
would be punished for refusal to submit to such activity. Sexual
harassment also includes any employee conduct reasonably
interfering with another employees work performance by creating
an intimidating, hostile, or offensive working environment.
54

Economy
Its easy to get lost in that jungle of words. How
effective will that policy be when the clarification is so
dense? The following sentence provides another
example of uneconomical writing.
Parking in the lot adjacent to the building will be
restricted by space allocation designation for workers
vehicles and the four outermost spaces will be reserved
for supervisors of the construction crew so employees
should make other arrangements for parking during that
time frame and consider implementation of vehicular cotransportation.
55

What should you do instead? First, determine

what information in the sentence you want the
reader to understand. Then, eliminate any
unnecessary phrases or redundancies. Try one of
these revisions:

Consider carpooling, because parking next

to the building is primarily for workers.

Because we are designating parking spaces

for construction workers, we suggest that you
carpool.
56

Weak words
You can make your writing clearer by deleting words that
dont add meaning. For example, pay close attention to the
following words:
actually
basically
certain
definitely
different
generally
given
individual
kind of
particular
practically really
various
very
virtually
These words are not bad, but people tend to use them
unnecessarily. Example: Actually, I generally kind of enjoy
typing practically any specific type of communication. These
words weaken the sentence because they add nothing to it but
length.

57

How can you keep your writing lean and strong? When you might
use one of the following phrases, try the shorter equivalent instead.
in the event that
= if
subsequent to
= after
prior to
= before
the possibility exists for
= might
in order to
= to
in the neighborhood of
= around, about
from time to time
= occasionally
in reference to
= about
it is necessary that
= must
due to the fact that
= because
in the amount of
= for
Heres another example of fat writing found in a typical memo.
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To: All employees

From: Lebron James, Chief Operating
Officer
This is to inform you that a new Audi, gray
in color, was actually left by someone in the
back parking lot. Due to the fact that the car
has continued to remain there for several
weeks and is still yet unclaimed, the
company has been given permission
59

by the police to auction off the car if we

make a donation of the monies earned to
some type of charitable organization. If
you are willing and able to be in charge of
the auction and to run the subsequent
committee, please stop in at this point in
time to take the time to discuss the most
important and essential elements of the
auction proceedings.
60

Someone left a gray Audi in the back lot several months

ago. Because no one has claimed, the police have
given us permission to auction it off. Well donate the
monies raised to a charity. If you would chair the
committee to run the auction, please see me.

Which memo would employees be more likely to

read and understand? Both memos express the same
information, but the second is stronger because its more
economical.
An easy way to write more economically, by using
fewer words and keeping sentences shorter, is to reduce
redundancy. How many of the following expressions do
61
you use? How many could you reduce?

Consensus of opinion/general consensus

A consensus by definition is a general
solidarity of opinion.
Contained herein
Contained means herein.
Submitted a resignation
Use the verb resigned
Basic fundamentals
Fundamentals are by definition basic.
62

Close proximity
Proximity means close.
Provide with information
Use the verb inform.
Cooperate together
Cooperate means work with others, so
its necessarily together.
Completely full
Full means totally or completely
unless its not.
63

End result/final outcome

A result or an outcome is what you get at the
end.
Take under consideration
Use the verb consider
Many in number
The word many can only refer to number.
Future prospects
Prospects refers to the future; its from the Latin,
looking forth.

64

Sufficient enough
Sufficient means enough.
Other alternative
Alternative means another choice, so other
alternative makes sense only if there are at least
three options.
New innovation
Innovation means new.
Past experience
Experience usually refers to the past, so you
would modify it only to refer to the present or future.

65

Postpone until later

Postpone means put off until later.
True facts
Facts are things that are true.
Mutually agree
When theres more than one party, agree
assumes mutuality.
Completely finished
Finished implies completely.
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Recurring habit
A habit is recurring behavior.
Past memories
What else can we remember but the past.
Initial preparation
Preparation implies initial, because its
done before something.
More preferable
Preferable means more desirable.
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Important essentials
Essential means important.
Various different
Various means different. Also different after numbers
is usually redundant: e.g., We considered seventeen different
locations or I called her five different times.
Future plan
Plan implies future unless specified otherwise.
Free gift
A gift is something given voluntarily, without payment in
returen.
Continue to remain
Remain means to continue to be.
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Straightforwardness
You can write in a more straightforward
manner when you place the subject and the verb
close together. Use subject-verb-object order with
strong action verbs.
If you write clearly, economically, and in a
straightforward manner, people will find your
writing more readable.
Why is it important to keep the subject near
the verb? This next announcement shows what
can happen when you dont.
69

Straightforwardness
The executive managers of Acme Anvils, in
their meeting April 5, called for the purpose of
discussing problems encountered in negotiating a
contract with their principal iron ore supplier,
Ferrous Ingots, which has recently undergone
substantial personnel changes, have decided, in
consideration of the extreme importance of our
iron ore supply, to arrange, as soon as possible
within the limitations of their individual
schedules, a meeting with the executive managers
70
of Ferrous.

Straightforwardness
How many times did you have to read that
announcement to understand what was
happening? Not only is too much crammed into a
single sentence, but the subject-verb-object order
(executive managers have decided to arrange a
meeting) is interrupted by clauses that confuse
the reader. The following revision seems more
straightforward:

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The executive managers of Acme Anvils

met April 5. They called the meeting to
discuss problems in negotiating a contract
with their principal iron ore supplier, Ferrous
Ingots. The problems came out of a number
of personnel changes at Ferrous.
Because our iron ore supply is extremely
important, the managers decides to arrange a
meeting with the executive managers of
Ferrous.
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Conversational but professional

Most e-mail messages, business letters,
memos, and reports replace conversation. Thus,
they are most effective when they convey an
informal, conversational tone instead of a formal,
pretentious tone. But messages should not become
so casual that they sound low-level and
unprofessional. Sloppy, unprofessional expression
appears in many e-mail messages. Your writing
should have a warm, conversational tone that does
not include slang or low-level diction.
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74

Unprofessional If we just hang in

there, we can snag the contract.
Conversational If we dont get
discouraged, we can win the contract.
Formal
If the principals
persevere, they can secure the contract.

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Your goal is a warm, friendly tone that sounds

professional. Write to the reader with words that
are comfortable to you. Avoid long and complex
sentences. Use familiar pronounces such as I,
we, and you and an occasional contraction, such
as were, or Ill. Stay away from third-person
constructions such as the undersigned, the writer,
and the affected party. Also avoid legal
terminology and technical words. Your writing
will be easier to read and understand if it sounds
like the following conversational examples:
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Formal
All employees are herewith instructed to return the
appropriately designated contracts to the undersigned.
Conversational Please return your contracts to me.
Formal
Pertaining to your order, we must verify the sizes
that your organization requires prior to consignment of your order
to our shipper.
Conversational Well send your order as soon as we confirm the
sizes you need.
Formal
The writer wishes to inform the above-referenced
individual that subsequent payments may henceforth be sent to the
address cited below.
Conversational
Chicago.

Your payments should now be sent to us in

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Avoid trite phrases, cliches, and jargon

Would you like your writing to bore or confuse the
people who read it? Of course not! But thats likely to
happen if you use trite phrases, cliches, and jargon. In
business writing you may come across phrases such as
enclosed please find, please do not hesitate to ask,
take under advisement, it has come to my attention,
maximum optimization, at this point in time, and
thanking you in advance for your kind consideration.
These are cliches that weaken your writing, and you should
consciously avoid using them. Cliches are dull and
sometimes ambiguous. The following partial list contains
cliches you should avoid in business writing.
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Avoid trite phrases, cliches, and jargon

below the belt
better than new
beyond the shadow of a doubt
easier said than done
exception to the rule
fit the bill
first and foremost
hard facts
keep your nose to the grindstone
last but not least
make a bundle
pass with flying color
quick as a flash
shoot from the hip
stand your ground
tune to form
to be perfectly honest
needless to say
enclosed herewith, please find
we deem it advisable
for your perusal, review, and consideration
If you should have any further questions, please do not hesitate to
call.
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Jargon, which is terminology unique to a certain

profession, should be reserved for individuals who understand it.
Except in certain specialized contexts, you should avoid jargon
and unnecessary technical terms. For example, geologists speak
knowingly of exfoliation, calcareous ooze, and siliceous particles.
Engineers are familiar with phrases such as infrared processing
flags, output latches, and movable symbology. Telecommunication
experts use such words and phrases as protocol, mode, and
asynchronous transmission.
Every field has its own special vocabulary. Using that
vocabulary within the field is acceptable and even necessary for
accurate, efficient communication. Dont use specialized terms,
however, if you have reason to believe that your reader may
misunderstand them.
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Precise verbs
Effective writing creates meaningful images
in the mind of the reader. Such writing is sparked
by robust, concrete, and descriptive words.
Ineffective writing is often dulled by insipid,
abstract, and generalized words. The most direct
way to improve lifeless writing is through
effective use of verbs. Verbs not only indicate the
action of the subject but also deliver the force of
the sentence. Select verbs carefully so that the
reader can visualize what actually is happening.
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General
Our salesperson will contact you next week.
Precise
Our salesperson will (telephone, fax, e-mail,
visit) you next Monday.
General
The CEO said that we should contribute.
Precise
The CEO (urged, pleaded, demanded) that
we contribute.
General
We must consider this problem.
Precise
We must (clarify, remedy, rectify) this
problem.
General
The newspaper was affected by the strike.
Precise
The newspaper was (crippled, silenced,
demoralized) by the strike.

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The power of a verb is diminished when

it is needlessly converted to a noun. This
happens when verbs such as acquire,
establish, and develop are made into nouns
(acquisition, establishment, and
development). These nouns then receive the
central emphasis in the sentence. In the
following pairs of sentences, observe how
forceful the original verbs are as compared
with their noun forms.
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Weak
Acquisition of park lands was made
recently by the city.
Strong
The city acquired park lands recently.
Weak
The webmaster and the designer had a
discussion concerning graphics.
Strong
The webmaster and the designer
discussed graphics.
Weak
Both companies must grant approval of
the merge.
Strong
Both companies must approve the
merge.
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Concrete nouns
Nouns name persons, place, and things. Abstract
nouns name concepts that are difficult to visualize, such
as automation, function, justice, institution, integrity,
form, judgment, and environment. Concrete nouns name
objects that are more easily imagined, such as desk, car,
and lightbulb. Nouns describing a given object can range
from the very abstract to the very concrete for example,
object, motor vehicle, car, convertible, Mustang. All of
these words or phrases can be used to describe a Mustang
convertible. However, a reader would have difficulty
envisioning a Mustang convertible when given just the
word object or even motor vehicle or car. In business
writing, help your reader see what you mean by using
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concrete language.

Concrete nouns
General a change in our budget
Concrete a 10 percent reduction in our budget
General that companys product
Concrete NECs Ultra Express pager
General a person called
Concrete Ms. Swain, the administrative assistant,
called
General we improved the assembly line
Concrete we installed 26 advanced Unimate
robots on the assembly line
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