Keeping Children Safe: Parents session

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Who is a child?

Any individual under the age of 18

years is considered a child.

(Legal definition)

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What is Child Sexual Abuse ?

Any act, using a child for the sexual gratification of the more powerful person.

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Types of Sexual Abuse

Contact Abuse:

Penetrative - Peno - vaginal intercourse, Anal sex, oral sex

Touching of the child's private body parts, making the child touch the powerful person's private body parts

Fondling of the child's body with an intention of sexual gratification of the powerful person.

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Types of Sexual Abuse

Non Contact Abuse:
Exposing child to pornographic content: Movies, MMS clips, internet, Magazines etc. Making the child watch others indulging in sexual activity or showing private body parts of others. Talking about sex and sexual activity with the child. Passing comments of sexual nature. Showing the child the private body parts of the powerful person, a powerful person watching a child's private body parts while the child is undressing or bathing for their sexual gratification

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Statistics on Child Sexual Abuse

More than 53% of children in India report one or more forms of sexual abuse Both girls and boys are equally vulnerable. More number of reported cases in age group 5 12 yrs
50% of sexual offenders were known to the child or were in positions of trust. 53% children faced one or more forms of sexual abuse - National Study on Child Abuse 2007

76% of respondents were sexually abused as children RAHI Study, New Delhi, Mumbai, Kolkotta, Chennai & Goa1997 63% of girls were abused as children by family members Sakshi Study, New Delhi 1997

47 % of respondents were sexually abused as children Samvada Study, Bangalore 1996

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How does sexual abuse happen?

grooming

Grooming is a process by which the abuser wins the childs trust.

- For example the child may be given presents or told that they are "special".

reinforcement

abuse

Accommodation means a childs response to abuse as a result of grooming. - where the child sees no way to escape ongoing abuse and thus learns to adapt.

accommodation

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What are the other aspects of Child Sexual Abuse?

Lack of consent Intent Exploitation Ambivalence

Secrecy

Force

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How does it impact the child immediately?

Shock Fear Guilt Shame

Confusion

Anger

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Are there early visible detectors of sexual abuse?

Social Withdrawal Increased hostility or aggression Overly pleasing behavior Drastic change in achievement patterns

Social

No sure way, unless the child tells us so but these are indicators

Sexualized behavior Early sexual activity Use of abusive sexual language

Sexual

Medical

Psychosomatic illnesses
Pain or swelling in genital area Repeated urinary infections Sexually Transmitted Infections

Psychological
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Eating disorders Anxiety or Indifference Depression Suicide attempts

How does it impact the child as they grow into adults?

In Relationships
Inability to trust Trouble in Sustenance Inaccurate judgments Domestic Violence

Sexuality
Overtly sexualized behavior Sexual withdrawl Confused sexual identity Being offenders themselves

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Children more Vulnerable to Sexual Abuse

Low self esteem. Marital discord households, financial instability, illness - Persistent/Terminal illness, arrival of younger sibling.

Children who are overly fearful of adults Children with parents who are too busy for them. Children without parental care - orphans, unaccompanied and separated children, street children, child laborer, children in institutions

Mentally and physically differently abled children.

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Why dont children tell us?

its our special secret

i dont even know how to say what happened, i just feel weird

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Why and When do they tell us?

Inability to bear abuse anymore or physical illnesses following sexual abuse Increased awareness & understanding of the abuse Secure adult relationships Discussion with an understanding parent or other adult Fear of close others getting abused Revelation during therapy for any other reason

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Why professional help is needed?

Abuse is not his/her fault Encourages child to feel good about her/himself. Develops childs self esteem

Creates a secure base for child to fall back on

Minimizes traumatic impact and enables child to move forward with less pain and

better understanding through therapeutic healing

Family members also benefit from counseling and is better equipped to handle their

own emotions and respond to the childs need

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How should we handle disclosure?

Keep calm

Believe the child

Affirm the child for telling you. Give positive messages - Im glad you told me, - I will help you now

Demonstrate that you believe what the child has shared.

Reassure him/her that you will assist in getting help. Answer their questions honestly Emphasize that the problem is not the fault of the child. Promise that you will tell only those people you are required to tell and no one else.

Seek counselling for the child and support for the family

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What should we NOT do?

Please do not blame the child!!!

Panic or overreact Pressure the child to talk Make the child repeat the story Confront offender in childs presence

DO NOT

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Is there a way we can prevent abuse from happening?

YES!
as adults we need to take responsibility for keeping our children safe openly honestly continuously

talking to our children

teaching them about Personal Safety

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Talking with our Children

Listen
Talk frequently Remember talk goes both ways Make time for children to talk when they want to talk Use open ended conversation No fake listening Be Honest! Give constant reassurance and praise Avoid discouraging statements

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