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Its your seed

By B.Deepak Kumar

2012 B. Deepak Kumar All rights reserved No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in or introduced into a retrieval system or transmitted, in any form, or by any means without prior permission of the publisher. Request for copy permission and copies of the book may be directed to bdpak_kumar@yahoo.co.in. Printed in India

THANKSGIVING
Great is my God for his shower of blessings in the form of knowledge, thankful to the people around for their never ending positive source of power, a necessity for developing a clear picture of this wide philosophical world.

(B. DEEPAK KUMAR) Mail to: bdpak_kumar@yahoo.co.in

Its your seed by B.Deepak Kumar

TO THE READERS
Gift of parenthood is one of the best gift by nature to a couple. It is a gift as well as a responsibility to be fulfilled by a couple. Some couples do have some complaints about this responsibility and hence try to put on hold their plans of having a baby owing to their personal needs. For a male, it may be about having a house, a car etc, for a female, it may be her beauty concerns or caretaking pain etc. With wide variety of reasons couples delay a natural process from occurring. Amongst these types of people, we can also find some Godly hearts that understand the importance of a kid. People with such an heart, do think on the ways and try to bring up their child in a best possible style they believe in. They also help their kid grow up as a responsible individual in this wide open world. What about the book? I know its the question you are going to shoot at me. As a caring parent, I appreciate your effort or interest in knowing things

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which will make your kids future great and bright. You are at the right place to begin a journey and as you finish this trip you will have handful information and tips about the ways you can understand the state of mind of a kid as well as his/her expectations. You may find many books in the market suggesting about your kids eating, reading, socializing habits etc., This particular book will let you know about the ways of understanding your kids mind and treat them as human beings to be taught rather than treating them as a box to be filled up. You may provide your kid with best clothes, best shelter, best education but it is the best point of view about this world which the child always expects from you. You provide him/her with every great resource but warn him/her from behaving freely in this world in the name of caution. And the kid grows up cautiously not happily. This is a practical book which will introduce you to the expectations of the mind of kids.

When you can understand expectations of a mind half the problem is solved, rest of the problem can be solved by thinking on the techniques or the ways

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of either fulfilling good expectations or limiting and correcting those bad expectations. Be ready to get into socks of a kid, sometimes having a relook on our past helps us in recalculating our future. You have choose this book with a good intention of understanding your kid and you will end up understanding something more about yourself too. As an author of this book, my best wishes are with you, praying for your true welfare.

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Table of Contents
Chapter Page

1. Point of View.05
2. Decisions ............19
3. Appreciation .27
4. Desires34
5. Nature..39
6. Great people...42
7.
8.

Two Worlds..51
Unique Kids.53

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CHAPTERCHAPTER-1 POINT OF VIEW

It was a multi-specialty hospital situated in India; tensed moods outside an operation theater, unable to hear the screaming sound from inside, everyone were waiting for an arrival. As the time passed, their views stuck at the doors of an operation theater. At last a doctor came out, aiming at all those sharp listening ears and particularly to those of a man; he saidCongrats Mr., you have a healthy girl child. The gathering cheered loud and then tensed man, who was the husband of the lady inside the OP Theater, was filled with an excitement of accepting his new responsibility as a Father. He looked around the relatives present there with a sense of happiness and pride. Thanking the doctor whole heartedly, father was eager to have a first look of his new born baby. After a brief wait, he actually saw the baby. During

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this period, lot of emotions were experienced by him, a person who was till now leading a different life on this earth, began to believe that he was indeed a reason for creation of a Life on this earth. He approached his wife, after kissing her turned towards his baby, touched its skin which was as soft as petals of flower, enjoying the sight he was up in tears of happiness. He understood Life. A Baby is born with a fresh mind, fresh energy, fresh soul etc. Believe me a kid grows and its mind will think as well as analyze incidents by connecting one situation with some other situation or one instruction with another. Keep speaking to your kid you will know it better; kids have a superb creative way of analyzing an incident, the way you hadnt thought about in your entire life. You are being made a part of this exercise of understanding your kids behavior for a reason. As I had informed earlier, you had chosen this book with a good intention of understanding your kid and you will end up understanding more about yourself too. As young parents, you need to know that there is a difference between you and your child. Let me elaborate. Every human being on this earth passes

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through three different stages of Life. First one is known as younger stage of life wherein human beings dont have any responsibilities and hence recognized as kids. Kids eat, play, learn and perform all activities in their life under the supervision of guardians. They live in their own world and are not worried about materialistic compulsions of life till they are protected by their parents. A kid performs an act based on ability factor without thinking about its good and bad consequences. Next is the adult stage of life. An adult has lots of obligations to be fulfilled. For every act committed by him/her, an associated reason is expected which may be conveyed to the people around based on the situational requirements. Thus adults need to convert only those thoughts into an efficient act which are felt to be good for themselves as well as people around. Finally it is about the transformation stage wherein a human being in his/her younger stage of life gets transformed into an adult. The person who thus gets transformed to gain conscious about his

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responsibilities in this world is said to have become matured in his/her life. A stress upon this particular stage of life is justified owing to its ability of directly influencing the state of mind of a human being. The term state of mind here refers to mood of a person which may be either happy or sad. When human beings mature, lots of changes are experienced in their life, these changes are of both physical as well mental in nature. Physical changes are set of biologically tuned process which gets self initiated as the person grows physically wrt time. But by understanding various dimensions of mental changes we can discover a path of true happiness. A person, who may be physically disabled, can still scale great heights of happiness in his life by being mentally matured. A human being who is passing through stage of mental maturity tends to develop/accept a belief about the life led on this earth based on five important factors as mentioned below:

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1. Thinking power of the particular human being 2. His/her observational power 3. Physical ability 4. Past experience and conclusions of the parents 5. People with whom the particular human being interacts. A combination of above mentioned five causes drives the mind of a person towards a belief and with this belief as a basis the particular person succeeds in designing a Point of View (PoV) about the life led on this Earth. Point of view of a person is a unique identity i.e. each human being has his own PoV about an idea or an incidence experienced. Human beings who are successful in gaining a belief in the good qualities shall possess a positive PoV about the life led on this earth to experience true happiness in their life. I know that above set of information has been too heavy on your mind. To simplify, a parent who gives good food, good clothes, good shelter and good education is considered as a good parent.

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But parents who apart from fulfilling the above materialistic needs, when they succeed in presenting a Positive Point of view about life to their kids, they will be thanked by their kids throughout their life. Before trying to present a positive point of view about this world to your kids, let me tell you that it is necessary for you to possess that positive point of view about the world else you will end up feeding something wrong to your kids which you didnt wish for. And many of you may fret that it is your life and I have no authority in changing or altering with your PoV about the life. I may agree upon your point with respect to your unique behavior but when it comes to your kids, let them have a change. If you dont permit it, you are just going to raise them as a copy cat of your life, nothing new, nothing refreshing and damn boring. This boring life has every power of making your kids life go sick which is nothing but negative. How can you ascertain that you have a positive point of view about life? But before answering this question if I say that your kids welfare is not only

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in your hands but also in the hands of the people around i.e. your spouse, neighbors, workers in your house etc would you agree? Yes, you need to. I would like to convey that nature has put us in a tight spot wherein we can never be happy all alone, even if we are so it will be short-lived; we need to be good and work on the goodness of the people around or else follow the lifestyle of the people around. Tricky situation indeed!!!!! Hence if you wish your kid to have great qualities you must bring him/her up among the people who have been successful in practicing great ideas/thoughts in their life It is a wholesome reaction on your kid as in the below picture:

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You and your spouse

KID
Your relatives and neighbor Your kids friends and well

So here is the method to bring up your child in a healthy environment: 1. You learn good and great thoughts to develop a positive point of view about life. 2. You teach or prove those thoughts to your kids by speaking positively and inculcating good habits in them.

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3. You also share the good messages and good aspects of life with your spouse, neighbors, relatives and friends. In short, create a circle of good positive environment, it may be at home or at office or anywhere you move about. It is time to come back and concentrate on our question of how to ascertain whether we are having a positive point of view about life or not? To analyze, you need to make a list of situations wherein you felt sad or happy about your life. Have you made a list? Now among the list, segregate the situations as materialistic and humanistic. A person with a positive point of view never feels happy or sad for his/her materialistic needs i.e. money, material, position etc. Even with respect to humanistic crisis i.e. a lie from your dear one, cheating etc a positive minded person will not be sad. A person with a positive point of view will be sad only when there is a loss of life it may be of his/her relatives, friends or someone who doesnt even know him/her i.e. completely unrelated.

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If you cant believe me, you can cross verify the information. Kids are the best individuals who are naturally gifted with positive mind in their life but are unconscious about the fact and as they grow the fact is forgotten by them. A kid gets falsely happy and sad for all the materials i.e. toys, chocolate, gifts etc, but gets truly happy or sad for mother, father or a guardian. You can observe the difference in its cry for a toy and a cry for relationship and that difference explains everything. I would like to end up this chapter with a practical circumstance; you can decipher the desire of human beings for new things/materials as below. People believe that by gaining materials they can be happy, this notion is very much rampant and accepted by many societies around the world, which is not correct. The problem may not be of very serious type but it disturbs the fabric of a good society to make people experience sadness unnecessarily. So, let us analyze the reason for the problem with a refreshed mind and understand the foolishness of humanity in accepting materials as a target of life.

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People, especially the youngsters, believe that they are born on this earth to have new clothes, gadgets, vehicles etc, etc. Though on lighter part there may be nothing wrong with the belief but when the same is analyzed wrt knowledge of life, a real fact hidden behind the youngsters desire for new materials can be exposed. You love a new gadget, purchase and use it to feel happy. The reason behind this happiness is a sense of newness and refreshment felt by you. To be new, it is a requirement to constantly update our minds by keeping it in all time thinking mode. Ultimately, a desire for newness can be linked to the quality of continuous thinking without feeling lazy which is again a good quality to be practiced. A new vehicle or gadget or dress can be designed only by a person who has good qualities of voluntary commitment and concentration towards his work. By buying his new product you are actually supporting his good thought. Hence, peoples desire for new gadget is actually connected with good qualities of commitment and all time thinking.

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Your brain requires good thoughts to develop good qualities and not materials to satisfy it. Materials are only a tool for physical exposure of your level of knowledge. A more detailed proof is explained as below: Imagine that you are having a picture tube television (I know it is too odd to imagine), using it for around ten years and your neighbor is also having same kind of television. Neighbor and you are working in same company earning same amount of salary. Interview calls for a higher post is given to you as well as to your colleague from your company at a same time and both of you attend the interview. Your colleague, who has the quality of hard work and commitment as well as good interaction capabilities with his higher-ups, after a weeklong intensive preparation, attends and passes the interview to obtain promotion along with a salary hike. But, you being a lazy person dont give much interest to interview process and hence fail to clear the interview. Your colleague buys a new LCD television to replace the older picture tube version using his increased salary. Your wife makes a note of it and pressurizes you to buy one. She fails to understand

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your explanation regarding the inability to buy a new LCD TV citing your failure in interview process and thus a fight breaks open between both of you. With a bitter mood, you catch up a fight with your colleague citing his new LCD TV to be the reason for quarrel between you and your wife. A sense of sadness prevails at your home as well as at your office. At this moment of time, you may find fault in a material called LCD TV to be the primary reason for your sadness. But when the entire situation is analyzed properly with patience you will realize that it is lack of good qualities of hard work and commitment to the company from your side which were possessed by your colleague as the primary reason responsible for the present situation. Due to lack of above said good qualities you failed to clear the interview which in turn restricted your ability to buy a new LCD TV. This is a typical example to prove you that it is the difference in amount of good qualities/knowledge possessed which is responsible for sadness & enmity between two people and materials are just a physical representation of the same.

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To counter this problem, you can either learn and incorporate the good qualities of your friend into your life or try to convince your wife about your limitations. But we as adults sometimes get confused and feel truly happy or sad for materialistic needs completely ignoring the importance of human relationship. When a time arises in our life enlightening us about human values we would have missed the timeline which could have been turned into golden moments to be cherished and felt happy about. Through this first chapter, I request you to raise your kids up positively by feeding them with a belief on good qualities. You can take up a situation and analyze it before your kids to highlight the importance of a good quality hidden in the situation. You are also expected to help your kids understand their mistakes as well as achievements.

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CHAPTERCHAPTER-2 DECISIONS

Decision for a situation, is one simple sentence which has long lasting effect on the life of human beings. It is an ultimate tool which indicates the state of mind of a person, his/her character and probably his/her future too. Let me make it lighter. You came across my book and find it useful. Would you like to share this special information with others around or think otherwise? Now your mind will be in the processing mode, weighing the advantages and disadvantages options about sharing and not sharing. A good hearted person will be quick to decide and will share the information with other needy people. The only thought which makes him/her to arrive at this solution will be about the usefulness of this piece of information to others in solving their problems. When he/she develops this particular type of

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thought in his/her mind, the same is fed into mind as an instruction to deal with the future problems and optimizes mind to think in that positive direction. Thus a persons/kids mind are programmed step by step based on the observations, instructions and decisions taken. If you are a parent or guardian please be careful while speaking to kids or taking decisions before kids as you are not speaking but you are programming them. Many adults have problem in taking decisions and end up taking a wrong turn which may help them in fulfilling their wrong desires but they will miss a big deal of happiness which is a gift for selfless decisions. A classic example is imagining a situation wherein you are traveling in a car to catch a flight on an urgent business engagement. You fear becoming late to the airport and hence ride the car fast. In this hurried mood you involve in an accident by riding the car over a road crossing pedestrian. You watch him bleeding profusely. You are now in double mind. One mind tells you to help him and another mind asks you concentrate on

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your schedule of catching a flight without worrying about dying man. Two minds generated Two types and can be labeled as X and Y. Great!! These two minds are like two people, one on your left and another on your right. A person on your right indicates one direction and the one on your left indicates another direction. You are now expected to move by selecting one among the two directions. The two thoughts can be tabled as below, you can have a glance, but the principle I wish you to understand is about the art of selecting one suggestion among two or more and giving it a status of decision. Thought Xthought Level

Ythought Informs that by getting down you will miss the flight as well as your business. Thus tries to convince you for leaving the patient on the road all alone. A counter thought mentions Since no one is there on the road to inform the

Asks you to get down, take the patient to the hospital and save his life. Inform that if you try to escape, cops will chase and arrest you.
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police and patient is struggling for his life, cops would not be able to identify you. But patient needs to be admitted to the hospital by you for immediate treatment. By the time any passerby approaches, the patient would die and a life will be lost on this earth. A wicked mind responds that some passersby will take care of the patient.

Since the patient is an old man there is nothing wrong in leaving him to die.

Ythoughts responds to the same and tried to Xthought once again warns about put fault on the man the guilty feel of that it was mistake of killing a person to the old pedestrian to be experienced by cross the road without you for your entire watching out for the vehicles, hence you life. cant be held guilty.

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From the above table, you can observe two minds have put forth their arguments before you like two lawyers arguing before a judge. A judges decision will define his/her character as described below: Deducing a Persons behavior based on Support for Support for Xthought Ythoughts Basically a Good person by Heart Believes in following law of land. A good person who has quality of love and care for needy. Respects the importance of a life. Fears for punishments Basically a Selfish person

Thought Level

Obeys law only when there is an observer. Burden shifter, who shifts his/her burden on others shoulders Finds reason to forgo his responsibilities. A real wicked minded person who gives importance to his/her selfish needs only

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Now you can make out about the power of decisions which has the ability to explain your character to the people around. Considering yourself as the one who has made an accident, if your support is for Xthought at any level you will be considered as a good person by patient, if you support Ythought at any level you will be considered as bad person by the patient. By gaining an award of being a good human being, you will feel more confident of being in the right path of life. Goodness gives you happiness and happiness will gift you a confidence of moving ahead, it is like a chain reaction. Your goodness shall be considered only by another good person and your decision shall not only reveal your mentality but also reveal the mentality of the person with whom you were supposed to do a business wrt above example. To elaborate, imagine that you had supported the Xthought and conveyed the same to far end business partner, now a set of Xthoughts and Ythoughts shall arise in his mind and based on his support to type of thought you can reveal his mentality. If the business partner is good, he will support you and show respect to your good decision, else he will tag you as a foolish person

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who gave up a good business opportunity just for sake of an old person. It all depends on you i.e. you can be happy to have taken a right decision of supporting Xthought or be sad that you lost a business deal because of supporting the same. As a third type of reaction, you can be happy for getting an opportunity to identify your probable business partners character (good or bad) as a result of this accident. By this time, you should be clear about the importance of taking a decision (good as well as bad) for a situation in your life and its ability to control your state of mind as well as those of your friends & relatives. It is not about the situation which is to be noted but it is about the art of taking a decision which has great importance wrt the situation. Situations can differ, for example instead of car accident it may be your wife being sick and you have an important appointment at office or the situation may be your mother is sick but you have promised your lover for an outing.

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Second chapter is about helping your kid to take right decision. Kids learn pattern of taking decision from parents; they give importance to ideals comparable to those of their parents. If you give importance to wrong reason, the same may be repeated by your kids. So be cautiously careful while discussing things and taking decisions before Kids!

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CHAPTERCHAPTER-3 APPRECIATION APPRECIATION


There is always something interesting i.e. something special about a subject which often escapes from our notice. For example, multiplication table for 9 is as normal as any other one when observed lightly, but an interesting fact about this table do exists. A B 9X 1= 9X 2= 9X 3= 9X 4= 9X 5= 9X 6= 9X 7= 9X 8= 9X 9= 9 X 10 = 0 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1 0

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By separating the result of multiplication table into two columns of one digit each as shown above, an interesting pattern is exhibited. In column A, the digits are in ascending order from 0 to 9 whereas in column B, they are in descending order starting from 9 to till it reaches 0.This is about an interesting fact wrt multiplication table of 9 which needs to be appreciated. On the same lines an interesting as well as an important fact about human life does exist. Life is thought as a word which is used to distinguish a living and a non living being, but if understood in a complete sense we shall conclude that it is a fantastic gift and unexplainable feel. And this life exists nowhere in the universe except on our planet Earth, as on today. Life dwells on this earth due to the presence of favorable and suitable living conditions such as the protective magnetic field around the planet, presence of ozone layer, reception of right amount of heat & light from the sun and finally the presence of air, water & food for its survival. The wide variety of living beings ranging from whales to microorganisms has made this earth, their

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living habitat. We find fishes in water, birds in the air and elephants on the land. Micro organisms are present in all these three places. Each living organism has evolved itself in a unique way to lead a complete life cycle in the environment they like to live. For example, a living being recognized as fish is a unique creature which has evolved itself to lead a complete life cycle under water only. The evolutionary characteristics ranges from development of a stream lined body for the comfortable movement inside water as well as development of gills to inhale the oxygen content present in the water. Another living being recognized as bird is also a unique creature which has evolved itself to lead a life on land as well as in the mid sky filled with air. The evolutionary characteristics are modifications of its bones which are of light weight, presence of large air filled cavities to facilitate its respiratory system, development of wings etc. All these characteristics enable the creature called bird to fly in the air without any discomfort. You may now like to read about another important creature which has not only adapted itself to the

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environment but has also developed the ability to change/modify the environment to suit its requirement by making use of the thinking power possessed by the same. This creature has recognized itself as human being. Human being has not only adapted himself to lead a complete lifecycle on the land but has also developed abilities to spend time under water as well as in mid air sky by making use of his/her thinking power. Few visible physical characteristics of human beings are as mentioned below: A human has a head which consists of five sensory organs namely eyes to see, nose to smell, ears to hear, tongue to taste and skin to feel. He also has two hands and two legs. The head, the hands and the legs are all connected to a central body which accommodates a blood pumping heart system, a respiratory system, a food digestive system and a reproduction system. These elements of the human body are controlled by a supercomputer called brain through a nervous system, which helps the brain to control each and every part of the human body. Thus the human body system is a well organized system which helps us leading a comfortable life on this earth.

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Upon careful observation, you will understand that till now we had been concentrating only on the physical uniqueness of the organisms i.e. the physical uniqueness of fishes, birds and human beings. Apart from this physical uniqueness, the most important distinguishment which has not yet been taken into consideration is the uniqueness of thinking. Thinking pattern of animals is different from those of a human being and the same can be proved by the following analysis. A tiger doesnt think about good and bad aspects of killing a human being, but it surely thinks on ways to kill him more carefully without getting hurt. Hence, it attacks a human being when he is singular rather than in a group. But in contrast, a human being thinks whether it is correct or wrong to kill a tiger and acts on the basis of result of his thinking. Thus a tiger is killed if it is considered as a right act else left unharmed by the human beings. Thinking is an essential characteristic required for true survival of the human beings on this Earth and its importance is equal to or more than the other needs such as air, water and food. While

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the air, water and food help in physical existence, thinking helps in true existence. The difference between the true existence and physical existence can be best understood by observing a common human being and a mentally ill human being. Though a mentally ill person leads a physical life same as that of a common man in terms of breathing, drinking, eating etc, but on the whole he is not considered as a normal human being because of one reason which is the absence of ability to think correctly. The term think correctly is used in the above paragraph as it is not practically correct to say that a mentally ill person doesnt thinks. Without thinking he cannot perform basic life activities of breathing, drinking, eating etc. But the factor which is responsible for him to be identified as a mentally ill person is his inability of controlling his mind and making use of his thinking power i.e. power to distinguish the thoughts as either right or wrong and act accordingly. Due to this inability, he feels no difference in behaving like a child, scolding others unnecessarily or doing any other wrong activities.

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The unique ability of human being to think, develop thoughts and differentiate thoughts as either good or bad, distinguishes humans style of thinking from that of other animals. As a reader, you might have observed that while appreciating life we came across many good aspects about life. When you appreciate something good around, your mind will be tuned to observe good of other aspects unconsciously. Hence it becomes your obligation to help your child appreciate the good things around; Appreciation matters...

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CHAPTERCHAPTER-4 DESIRES
As you keep thinking and taking good decisions, you will be developing belief on some good qualities like speaking truth, respecting people around, maintaining patience in life, wishing good for people around etc. These qualities help you in building a character which in turn helps you in controlling a force called Desire Desire being an emotional subject can be defined as a force which has the ability of making a human being move towards positive direction or towards the negative direction of life. Desire, if left uncontrolled shall ruin the life of the possessor. On the other hand, if the same is fully controlled then a particular person shall reach great heights of happiness. In short, desire can be equated to nuclear power, an uncontrolled nuclear power is highly destructive but when used in controlled environment it is useful to humanity. Apart from good character and thoughts (Please do visit my blog http://connect4deepak.blogspot.com to get a list of good thoughts for the day), some
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good practices help us in controlling the desire factor and they are as follows: First step is to develop an ability to keep your body under control through Yoga. In this step, you need to respect your body by keeping it neat and clean. You should not indulge in any act of addiction like smoking cigarette, drinking alcohol etc which shall spoil your body. By spoiling body you are spoiling a mind housed within body. A spoilt mind shall always think wrong to provide you with wrong conclusions. These wrong conclusions shall push a person to take wrong decisions and wrong decisions will connect you to sadness. Hence you need to worship your body by practicing Yoga and regular exercising.

Once you have achieved control over body, in the next stage you are expected to gain control over your mind through Yoga. A mind is as vast as an ocean which is hard to be controlled even by wisest of wisest human being. The only way to control mind is to convince it about the need of having control over the same as mentioned below in the third step.
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In the third step, you are expected to provide convincing reasons to your mind about your ability of making right use of the same under your control. And when you gain control over mind through your character, a control over your desire is possible. You will experience positive life.

People lie, steal, fight and perform all types of wrong acts mainly because they succumb to wrong desires. A graphical representation of control over desire is as follows:
Helps to control Belief on good qualities ---------------------Helps to attain state of Control over desire ---------------------------Positive Life Desire

Through this chapter I would like to draw your attention regarding the physical activeness of your kids, never allow your kids to get addicted to anything in life. A good behavior is linked to a good mind and a good mind is linked to a good body.

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CHAPTERCHAPTER-5 NATURE

Often in life we feel someone standing at the doorsteps of our mind, speaking to us and preventing us from doing something wrong. In a sad mood, we share the sadness with someone. That someone has no body, has no shape and has no fragrance. We call that someone as God, divine force, Jesus, Allah and so on. I call it nature. Its story time again. Imagine you are a frustrated husband fed up with your wifes attitude. Frustration reaches to such a drastic level that on one fine day you wish to punish her by tampering brake system of her vehicle with an intention of seeing her injured in an accident. But on that fine day, a situation arises wherein your wife decides to travel by public transport and hence escapes from your planned trap. You may feel cheated as your plans failed all of a sudden.

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Please understand that nature is master of whole world with access to fine information about each and every individual who have submitted themselves to natures might understanding its good intentions. Nature has its own calculations and its ultimate wish is to do justice to the people. Hence, you may find it justified punishing your wife but the nature may not agree with the same as it knows that your wife is not eligible for such a harsh punishment and hence she was made to skip the vehicle on that particular day. We call it fate. You must work in tandem with nature using your character based thinking power to understand true essence of leading a life on this earth. There are some atheists who believe that there is no God or no one is above them. Having an unseen master is good as well as bad. It is bad because in the name of unseen force superstitious practices were developed by mischievous people. These superstitious beliefs stunt the thinking ability of people. Good part of feel of God is that it helps human beings remember that there is some force greater than them and this earth is not their inherited property to be destroyed according to their
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wishes and whims. It is strange to see though people know that they are mortal and cannot take even a milligram of mud along with them after their death, still fight for materials to such an extent that they do not hesitate to kill each other having no mercy and devoid of feel of love in their hearts for fellow human beings. You as a responsible parent should introduce your kid to the wide spectrum of people available on this earth. From killers to philanthropists, from liars to martyrs, from womanizers to social workers who are working for and against good continuously. When you can create a good kid you will be adding a feather to the goodness of this world. I wish to conclude this chapter with a sentence that a perfectly learnt kid need not fear for exams, similarly a person who is perfect with his/her quality by heart and by soul need not fear nature or its wrath. When any person tries to misguide you in the name of nature, be prepared with an answer that you are good and need not fear anyone not even God. But do respect nature because latter respects good souls.

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CHAPTERCHAPTER-6 PEOPLE GREAT PEOPLE


Do you read about great people? Not about film/ sports star but about the people who did something for you i.e. something good for the society. When you read about such people please be courteous enough to share about them with ones who interact with you especially your kids. Every such good person incites the good part of our soul and generates a belief in good qualities to develop a good character. I wish to speak about two people who I am interested in. First of the two is Shri. Mohandas Karamchand Gandhiji, Father of India, a man who helped the human race to understand importance of peace and its usefulness when compared to violence. After tasting success with his new found nonviolence method against the strong opposition in South Africa, Gandhiji returned to India with a mission. Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi was a person who practiced to walk in the path in which
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he believed irrespective of other joining him or leaving him and gained huge following by that unique character of hugging non-violence and truth which others feared to do. Gandhiji was just a child and one day the Inspector of Schools, Mr. Giles, came to school in which Gandhiji was studying. He read out five English words to the class and asked students to write them down. Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi wrote four words correctly, but couldnt spell the fifth word `Kettle'. Observing Mohan's hesitation, the teacher made a sign behind the Inspector's back indicating Mohan to copy the word from his neighbors slate. But Mohan ignored his signs and wrote only four where as the others wrote all the five words correctly. After the Inspector left, teacher scolded him. "I told you to copy from your neighbor," he said angrily. "Couldn't you even do that correctly?" Everyone laughed. As Gandhi went home that evening, he was not unhappy. He knew he had done the right thing. The most important question which can be raised at this juncture is Why should a boy ignore suggestion of a teacher to copy? The same question can be related to another question wrt famous Scientist Newton i.e. Why should a person called Newton observe an apple falling
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from a tree and discover the force of Gravity among many hundred people? The answer is explained as below: The basic concept behind both the question is about usage of our thinking power in a useful right direction. The question related to Gandhiji, deals with world of thoughts (in computer language it can be known as a software entity, whose usefulness cannot be seen directly but can be felt). The other question related to Newton, deals with the world of materials (i.e. Hardware entity whose usefulness can be seen as well as proved instantly). Newton used his thinking power in observing the world and finding out the reasons for happenings of this world where as others took the happening of this world in a casual way without recognizing and appreciating the same. Concentrating on the question about Gandhiji, a thought shall never arise unless there is a reason for the same; with this idea in mind let us move further. One boy believes that copying is wrong; to arrive at this conclusion he has to think. He should first believe that he has ability or liberty to decide about right and wrong for his life. Many kids, at their age,
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would never believe to possess the liberty of choosing, as they blindly follow instructions of their elders bestowing full belief in them. Kids believe that it is not their duty to think about right or wrong at their age. They just spend their time in fulfilling their childish desires for good clothes, chocolates, gifts etc and find happiness in the same. A kid, who believes in possessing the liberty of making a choice for his life, must think deep to arrive at a correct conclusion either by taking reference from his/her past or by analyzing the situation based on principles of life learnt from his parents, teachers, relatives etc. In Gandhijis case, it was his fathers suggestions which guided him to the right path of life. In order to arrive at a correct conclusion, you should be true to yourself i.e. your mind should have good/correct qualities, which can help you to take correct decisions. With a corrupt mind you shall always analyze the input situation in a wrong way and provide a wrong decision as an output to later suffer with sadness.(In computer language, a computer can provide correct result/output for a given input, only if it has correct software loaded in it)

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Finally, when you have a correct decision and 100% belief in the same, you are expected to put forth your decision before the people without any hesitation and defend your good decisions among wrong ones. This again depends upon your level of understanding the problem and ability to explain your decision to the people without any confusion. These many factors are linked to a person who possesses the ability to take a good decision. A good decision taken which is based on your good principles shall lead your life towards true happiness and a bad decision taken on the basis of bad principles shall push your life into a sad state. With all the above features incorporated, Gandhi used his deep thinking and righteous judging power to take right decisions for all the problems faced in his life. A few of his notable decisions are a decision to not to copy during inspection at school , a decision to write a letter divulging his black secrets to his father as a punishment for his sins a decision to fight back the injustice of the powerful people through non violent movements.
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Gandhiji is just a typical example among the people who led their life purely based on good qualities. Another person who led her life same as Gandhiji but for different purpose is Mother Teresa. Mother Teresa is a great soul who took each and every decision in her life to make sure that her humane service shall reach the needy people. Though a lot of confusion is prevailing about her identity of being a God blessed child or not, but it is important to understand that: Every person who follows Gods philosophy of LOVE and CARE becomes God blessed and no special miracle is required to prove the same. Mother Teresa followed Gods philosophy of showing LOVE and CARE to the needy people. The words LOVE and CARE may be two simple four letter words, but the POWER possessed by two words is so strong that no evil thoughts can stand before them. It is because of this LOVE and CARE that a society actually accepts JUSTICE as a way of life. Yes, a wife will not flirt with other males if she LOVES her husbands heart more than the
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destructive body, similarly a kid will not hurt his mother if he loves her feelings, a father will not drink alcohol and waste his money if he CARES for the welfare of his family and kids, a good human will not like to deceive other humans if he has a feel of LOVE and CARE for them. So it is actually the absence of LOVE and CARE which diverts the human mind to embrace wrong way of life. Coming back to Gandhijis way of life, Gandhiji through his right thinking & justifying power introduced concept of NON VIOLENCE for protesting against the so called powerful people. The benefits of introducing non violence as way of protest can be felt even to this day which otherwise would have made this world a living hell. The popularity of non violence of Gandhiji can be felt by making a note of large number of people (Indians as well as other nationals) who supported this thought notwithstanding harsh physical pain which they had to bear in return. Many Indians thus gave up their life voluntarily for the idea of non violence to highlight the level of importance which it deserved in this world.

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Non Violence is one of the important gifts presented to this world and the same can be proved by the following explanation: Imagine, you are on an evening walk, enjoying the beauty of greenery and happiness of the children playing in the park. An unknown person comes and hits you all of a sudden. Your reactions can be any of the below: a) If you are an impatient person your immediate reaction would be to hit him back without any delay. This shall be followed by him hitting you. Both will fight till one becomes physically weaker than other. The person who emerges strong will have his say without any regards to the concept of goodness and badness. By observing this situation; you will find that there has been fight between two physical bodies only i.e. there was no room for any knowledge based argument. b) On the other hand, if you are a person with patience having a belief in non violence, you will first try to analyze the situation and make out whether the violent person is a drunkard or mentally affected. After confirming his mental fitness, you will then ask him the reason for the hit and explain that you have done nothing wrong to get beaten up.
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Therefore, in the case (b), a try is made from your end for minimizing the role of body conflict and maximizing the essence of knowledge based conflict. Knowledge based conflicts i.e. debates, discussions, meetings shall always conclude with good result as only good people shall possess more knowledge about life. The level of your commitment to the knowledge can be measured by observing the level of patience maintained by you. You may now be able to understand the amount of commitment by Gandhiji and his followers to knowledge based conflict. You have heard about two good people and I know that you will be feeling good from heart. Such is the power of good people, you speak about them and you will be gifted with a calm and cool mind. Try to gift this coolness to your kids too.

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CHAPTERCHAPTER-7 TWO WORLDS


Most parents, with an intention of keeping their kids happy, end up showing only the good part of the world. But, when a kid is introduced to bad side of world through others, matter gets worse. Many times we prevent our kids from accessing some aspects of life terming them to be not suitable for their age. It may be about your business, your dark habits like drinking alcohol etc. You prevent them with good intention of keeping your kid away from those habits. You need to make sure about one basic idea; your kids cannot understand your intentions but can understand your words. They can only see the things before their eyes and learn the same. So, when you prevent your kids from doing something by force, an area of interest gets created for your kids. They want to discover it. Nature has given much energy to kids and your kids know that. Hence, when they insist on something,

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they want it to be done; it may be for chocolates or gifts etc. With this natural power, when kids decide to discover something, they will not stop till it is done which is very dangerous. In the way to discovery, child may end up losing his/her precious point of view to develop wrong ideas in mind. But an intelligent and good kid will return as a prodigal son with much more precious knowledge about life. A better way to deal with this kind of problem is to gain your childs confidence, which is possible when you speak to your kid with a heart of surrender. You introduce your kid to hazardous world with his/her hands tightly gripped within your hand. You will be posed with many uncomfortable questions about life which you had been turning away and bluffing about to others when questioned about the same. The specialty about kids is that you cannot bluff to them even if you wish to do so because you love them very much and dont wish to fool them.

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Another advantage of you being with them in the bad world is that for any wrong happenings, kids can be confident of your support behind and hence will not take any decisions in haste. A kids world may be small; you need to be careful that a small seed is the one which grows into a big tree. It is better to deal with a seed than waiting the problem to be developed into a size of a tree.

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CHAPTERCHAPTER-8 UNIQUE KIDS


I hope to have covered every important thoughtful process involved in bringing up your kid with a healthy mind. We as grownups often fret and fume about reduction in importance to human values such as love, respect, dignity etc. But these words have value unto themselves, irrespective of recognition provided by us. It is up to us as grownups to recheck or restore values by describing about its importance to the younger generation. While doing so, be careful that you do not enforce these ideals on to them. Anything which is given with love passes the test of time, the thing which is fed with fear and torture will perish soon. Every childs heart is like a plant which should be grown up carefully with proper soil, ventilation and water. Most important requirement is patience. You cannot expect a seed to sprout immediately; it takes time, and you should have a tab on that aspect too.

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You may get best clothes for your kids, get a best house or join them to best school but at the end of the day your kid expects best reason for leading a life on this earth and best affection from you as parents. Be ready to fulfill their thirst for love and care. Having taken so much care about your kid, I thank you for your patience and interest shown in knowing about a kid as well as yourself too. Regardless of these many cares and precautions, there are possibilities that your kid might not turn up as expected by you. The facts as written by me are generalized for all the kids, but you need to know that not all flowers are same and each one is unique as well as different. Similarly not all the kids are same, with this generalized idea about kids, try to discover the uniqueness of your kids too. Alter your approach towards your kids in dealing according to their uniqueness with them with love and care as primary link between you and your kid. Be aware about physical diseases too like dyslexia etc.

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Never ever commit a mistake of imposing the same rules and regulation as it was imposed on you by your parents when you were young. There is a change in culture, change in requirement, and change in ambitions. Hence there arises a need for change in your approach with respect to taking care of your kid. Apply little mind and give proper reasons for your kid. He/she, with access to modern information will surely understand the message in your point. Have a belief in your kids intelligent understanding power. Lastly, according to me every human being is governed by three rules of nature and they are as below: i) First rule: When a human being is born in this world, he/she is exposed to education of both good and bad qualities of this world. ii) Second rule: After allowing him/her to gain sufficient amount of knowledge about life, human being is made to face a problem. In order to solve the problem, he needs to support either good qualities or bad qualities of this world.

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iii) Third rule: Human being shall be suitably rewarded by nature, based on his/her decision to support either good quality or bad quality.

Be on the good side of world and help your child to join the same, a humble request by me.

Love you all - B.Deepak Kumar

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