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Lashon ha Ra - a drash by Laurence Furic Friday, May 11, 2012

In loving memory of Kyla Rae Tillem, z"l

Shabbat Shalom!

Thank you for allowing me to speak on a Jewish topic that I deeply care about in front of all of you.

But first let me take a minute to congratulate the Verbeke's family on their simcha! MAZAL TOV!!!

Thank you Hayley for the beautiful torah chanting in honor of your brother's becoming barmitzvah that you graced us with.

I promise not to be long winded.

Or I'll try at least.

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Lashon ha Ra - a drash by Laurence Furic Friday, May 11, 2012

WHAT IS LASHON HARA


The topic of my drash tonight has been introduced to you as "Lashon haRa" which means in Hebrew "the evil tongue" or can be translated as "gossiping". The words are lashon : the tongue, the language ra = bad, as opposed to tov = good

Gossip: "Like the poison of a serpent" The Sages said: "A large number of people commit robbery, either directly or indirectly, a small number commit incest, but just EVERYONE is guilty of lashon hara, slander".

Everyone. Why is gossip like a three-pronged tongue? says the Talmud Because it kills three people: the person who says it the person who listens to it and the person about whom it is said

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Lashon ha Ra - a drash by Laurence Furic Friday, May 11, 2012

This is what Maimonides wrote about lashon hara in his code: Whoever tells tales about another person violates a prohibition, as it is said: "Do not go about as a talebearer among your fellows" (Leviticus 19:16)... Who is the talebearer? One who carries reports and goes about from one person to another and says, "Soand-so said this"; "I have heard such-and-such about so-and-so". Even if what he says or repeats may be true, the talebearer ruins the world. There is a still graver offense that comes within this prohibition, namely the evil tongue. This means talking disparagingly of anyone, even though what one says is true;

but he who utters a falsehood, is called a slanderer.

A person with an evil tongue is one who, sitting in company, says, "That person did such a thing"; "Soand-so's ancestors were so-and-so"; "I have heard this about him"; and then proceeds to talk scandal...

There are modes of speech that may be styled "dust of the evil tongue": such remarks as "Who would have thought that so-and-so would be as he is now"; or , "Be silent about so-and-so. I don't want to tell what happened", and so on... Equally reprehensible is the person who indulges in evil speech deceitfully, that is, speaks as though innocently, as if unaware that what he says is an evil utterance... Maimonides, Code, "Laws Concerning Moral dispositions and Ethical Conduct" - Chapter 7, section 1-4

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Lashon ha Ra - a drash by Laurence Furic Friday, May 11, 2012

WHY DO I CARE
This week's parshah is called "Emor" - = speak! Those who know me well know that this command suits me perfectly, doesn't it! I love to speak indeed, and I learnt to speak many languages. I also loved learning languages. But this is not why I care about this language of evil nature or good nature. It's because through my abilities to speak foreign language, or maybe through my own wiring, I perceived over the years how damaged I felt being exposed to lashon hara. It felt like the sun was retrieving from the sky, it feels like something disappears, hides behind the clouds and I wanted to understand that uneasy, unpleasant feeling.

How did I get to like studying lashon hara


That's how I got to study the laws surrounding lashon hara. There is a famous scholar who dedicated himself to teaching a language for life, his name is the 'Hafets 'Hayim (actually this is the name of his book and his name is Rabbi Israel Meir Kagan) - born in 1839 in the old country. The laws he studies and teaches all deal with how we, Jews, should treat our relationships with others, so that we enable the shekhinah, the divine presence, to dwell among us. In the Torah, the law I mentioned previously, and others contained in Kedoshim, end with "Ani Adonai Elohekhem" I am the Eternel your God, and this indicates that we are commanded those laws so that Adonai can reside amongst us. When we transgress, the divine presence recedes.

Why is it important that you care?


Words carry the potential of causing catastrophic harm often tearing apart families and friendships. The destructive power of negative speech is however surpassed by the beneficial power of positive speech.

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Lashon ha Ra - a drash by Laurence Furic Friday, May 11, 2012

WHERE DO YOU FIND LASHON HARA

An example of lashon hara in the Torah is Myriam starting to malign others, and especially her brother Moshe's marrying a Kushite (a non-hebrew woman). She gets sick and Moses uses the prayer "El nah refa nah la" (using his power of lashon hatov - the good speech - or good tongue - to heal her)

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Lashon ha Ra - a drash by Laurence Furic Friday, May 11, 2012

WHAT ARE THE CONNECTIONS WITH TODAY'S WORLD?

politics !!

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Lashon ha Ra - a drash by Laurence Furic Friday, May 11, 2012

WHAT CAN WE DO TO HELP?


You may well know the story of the pillow of feathers.

So what can we actually do? There are actually ways, through either abstinence, or self-discipline. It takes work and time, but we can pay attention to how we relate to others, and above all, we can choose to deliver positive speech, in most of the circumstances.

And it is worth it!


This is a difficult task because the struggle is ongoing and constant, but ultimately the mind can and must control the desires of the heart.

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Lashon ha Ra - a drash by Laurence Furic Friday, May 11, 2012

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT ALL THIS?

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