KASALANG PINOY: REVISITED

A Mini-Research Study Presented to Dr. Rosalia Caballero UST Graduate School

In Partial Fulfillment of the Requirements For the Subject Seminar on Filipino Personality

MELVIN S. CARREON Ph. D. in Clinical Psychology October 2009

INTRODUCTION The Family Code of the Philippines of 1988 defines marriage as a special contract of permanent union between man and woman for the establishment of conjugal and family life. NSO (2003) reported that men marry at much older age than women; the modal age for men is between 25-29, and 20-24 for women. Studies show that there are more widows than widower; there are more single males than females. The majority solemnized their marriages according to the Roman Catholic rites and during the months of January and May. Studies showed that marriage is considered the normal thing to do for both males and females (Tiglao, 1988) and that married people are much happier than unmarried. Filipino males marry to beget children while females marry as a commitment to responsibility, an act of independence, a cut to family ties, learning experience and financial security (Casuga, 1996). The first five years are considered to be of marital risks and the subsequent years are marked by marital harmony, acceptance of personality differences, better communication, sexual satisfaction, and greater acceptance of parental roles. Women of intact marriages describe the first decade of marriage as the most romantic, full of passion and the stage when both husbands and wives are willing to take the spouse or parental roles (Munez, 2001). Filipinos have conservative attitude towards cohabitation (Casuga, 1996); they condemn it especially the women. Tinio (1994) pointed out that dissolution of marriage is often caused by the failure of the husband to support financially and emotionally the family exacerbated by verbal, emotional and physical abuse, not infidelity (Tinio, 1994); female marital infidelity is the main cause of marital dissolution (medina, 1995). The Medina study among respondents who were permanently separated showed that most marital dissolutions were caused by infidelity of husbands and wives. It was reported that 60% of husbands and 20% of wives were found to cohabit with other partners.

This study revisits the attitudes of contemporary Filipinos towards marriage to determine whether the current attitudes are still congruent with the past attitudes of the Filipinos towards family and marriage.

OBJECTIVE OF THE STUDY This research study aimed to find out the current answers on marital issues such as reasons for getting married and selecting a partner, married couple ideas about current family life, and the common problems leading to couple separation and family breakdown.

SIGNIFICANCE OF THE STUDY The outcome of the study will benefit the Filipinos planning to get married and those who are actually married; this research will provide them additional knowledge to better understand the dynamics of Filipino marriage and family, resulting to a decrease in marital dissolution and unsuccessful and unhappy family life.

RESEARCH DESIGN AND INSTRUMENT This mini-research employed descriptive method using questionnaire to survey the responses of the married respondents on marital issues. The questionnaire consists of 30 items which are answerable by yes or no. A sample questionnaire is attached.

RESEARCH PARTICIPANTS AND PROCEDURE The researcher administered the survey on 20 married males and 20 married females from different parts of Metro Manila whose age ranges from 20-45 year old. His students helped him in distributing questionnaire and making it sure that all items were

answered. Some questionnaire was faxed to facilitate the process. The whole process including the collation and tabulation of data was finished in 5 days.

STATISTICAL TREATMENT The measures of central tendency (mean, mode and median) were determined. The percentage was computed. % = f/N X 100, where: % = percentage; f = total frequency; N = total population.

RESULTS AND DISCUSSIONS 100% of the female respondents and 75% of male respondents said that they are happily married. A higher percentage of women (65%) as compared to men (40%) believed that they are destined to be as one. 90% (F) and 35% (M) considered financial reason as basis for marrying. This result supports the Casuga study in 1996 that more women stayed in marriage because Filipino males marry to beget children while females marry as a commitment to responsibility, an act of independence, a cut to family ties, learning experience and financial security. 85% female and 75% male believed that they have still social life after marriage. 75% (F) and 60% (M) still believed in till death do us part. Obviously, there is no significant difference on their attitudes towards these areas. Do financial problems affect their marriage? 75% (F) and 45% (M) said yes. 85% (F) and 65% (M) asked their partners opinion when making a decision. When asked if they were good parents to their children, 85% of both sexes asserted that they were good parents. Only 25% (M) while 100% (F) felt that they are compatible with their partners in life. Unsurprisingly, only 20% male (as compared to 75% female) said they give quality 4

time to their partners. 60% (F) and 65% (M) believed that they have still time for themselves even though they have already a family. During an argument with the partner, 67% (F) and 55% (M) asked the advice of their parents. 60% (F) and 45% (M) admitted that sometimes they think that being single is much better. 70% (M) and 80% (F) argued that they are mature enough after many years of being married. This corroborates Casugas (1996) findings that the first five years are considered to be of marital risks and the subsequent years are marked by marital harmony, acceptance of personality differences, better communication, sexual satisfaction, and greater acceptance of parental roles. In terms of being honest to their partner, 80% (F), said they never cheated on their husbands while only 20% (M) admitted that did not cheat inside the relationship. Husbands infidelity is one of the main causes of marital dissolution and family breakdown. 70% (F) and 60% (M) stated that their partner satisfied their emotional needs; 60% (F) and only 35% (M) said their partner satisfied their sexual needs. 65% (M) and 45% (F) are gainfully employed but 60% (F) and 45% (M) believed that they are good providers. Tinio (1994) pointed out that marital dissolution is often caused by the failure of the husband to support financially and emotionally the family exacerbated by verbal, emotional and physical abuse, not infidelity. Only 20% said that they are battered husband; 55% admitted that they are battered wife. This supports the existence of domestic violence inside the family. Most abusers are male adults who commit physical, psychological, economic abuses and neglect against children and married females (Knoz and Schacth, 2002). The victims suffer from guilt, fear and dependency and they have the feelings that they were abused either because they deserve it; they do not have choice but to live with the abuser because of fear of reprisals, they have no place to go, and they are economically dependent on the abuser for support. Finally, only few (15%, F; 25%, M) regretted that they got married. This affirms the positive outlook of the Filipinos towards marriage.

CONCLUSION Based on the findings of the study, it can be concluded that the most of the attitudes of the Filipinos in the 1990s towards marriage and family life are still congruent with the attitudes of contemporary Filipinos.

RECOMMENDATIONS In the light of the findings of the study, the researcher recommends the following: 1. Before getting married, one should set criteria or standards on selecting a partner to have a secured and better future. 2. Married couples should communicate constantly to express their emotional, psychological, material and sexual needs to prevent marital dissolution. 3. Both husband and wives should be involved in decision making.

IMPLICATION Marriage is a sacred institution that is universally found in almost all societies, thus married couples should exert all efforts to uphold its sanctity by ensuring that all family members especially the children would be fulfilled and actualized inside the family.

References: Agoncillo, Teodoro A. & Guerero, Milagros (1986). History of the Filipino People.

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