OH! FOR A SIMPLE LIFE by Vinti Jetley A few years ago, I was leading a simple and undisturbed life.

Minor physical ailments, which only occasionally cropped up, were always cured by a quick visit to a physician and usually so at an affordable price. Ones mental health too, was blissful and caused little concern. I did strongly believe that time was the greatest healer and the rare bout of melancholy disappeared with the passage of a little time. Alas! One fine day, all that changed. I still remember that fateful morning when I was happily enjoying my morning cup of tea while randomly browsing through the advertisement section of the newspaper. Of course, the news carrying part of the paper was firmly in the clutches of the man, who during our wedding ceremony, had vowed to share everything with me equally! Only occasionally, could my eyes focus on diverse national, international, sports and entertainment related stories as my husband turned the pages of the paper. Never earlier had I committed the blunder of possessing that rootless gaze which gets lured by small commercial advertisements of multifaceted nature. But accidents do occur in every individuals life. I absentmindedly scanned my eyes on inane advertisements and only partly listened to my husbands commentary on the correctness or otherwise of American military action in some remote part of the world. Suddenly a flashy ad caught the attention of my otherwise contented visual faculty. Relax in the Lap of Mother Nature the title seemed to suggest that it was the advertisement for one of the numerous housing colonies springing up. However, a closer look revealed something different. The advertisement had been placed by an institution which claimed to provide eternal mental and physical bliss with the help of completely natural and healthy methods. Uncharacteristically, I decided to give it a try and rang up the firm to find that this promise of eternal happiness did involve relinquishing monies which could not quite be termed as negligiblebut then, who could turn down the offer for everlasting happiness without side effects! This was perhaps the first time I was spending a few pennies on a course of instruction after my formal education. So while it did pinch my pocket a bit, I consoled myself by the fact that it was for the betterment of this my household and society in general. I wont specify the name and the details of the institution as I do not want to further erode my already worn out pocket by way of contesting libel action. Suffice it to say that for the next two months I ate practically fifty percent of the entire flora present on this planet. Of course, the remaining half was used for application over my generally healthy body in the form of some paste or concoction, which was totally unrecognisable by smell or colour. This treatment purported to cure me of all the ailments which would have ever attacked my body in the coming years. As far as my mental bliss was concerned, those two months were spent in such a frenzied agenda that the conclusion of the course brought a sense of much needed calm and serenity in my life. It would only be correct to say that at the end of the course not only me and my household, but even the domestic help, the dhobi and the milkman were becalmed and relieved, so hectic was my schedule.

An year passed and my yearning to experiment blossomed again. This time it was a newly introduced and novae trendy science of art of healing which caught the attention of my now addicted mind. As I set out to gather the pro and cons of this course I was made to believe that every aching bone of my body could be healed with a sort of distance education programme. I must confess it did seem to happen at that time but it was also for the first time that I noticed the presence of all these discomforts and realised the degree of their seriousness. There was no looking back after that. From the Spirituality in Medicine, Chinese Astrology, The Secrets of Kabbalah, Science of Zen to the Fine Art of Living I tried everything to remain mentally and physically fit. From transcendental meditation to power yoga I put my finger in every pie. I read each and every article which laid stress on the importance of leading a healthy and serene life. My medical thesaurus improved astonishingly and so did the profit of my raddi wallah as every paper, periodical and publication was bought by me with the zeal of a convert. Concurrently, some foreign authors and their articles also made me aware of my own rich cultural heritage. Research work conducted in developed nations revealed the virtues of local Indian food. It took almost half a decade for me to formally and proudly adopt and lead the lifestyle which, in any case, I had been leading all these years before the deluge of these programmes. I was always a happy and fairly healthy human being, but it was these numerous programmes which highlighted how healthy and happy I really was. Every Guru of his respective field made me believe that his was the only way to redeem my squandered self. The amazing clarity of their goals puzzled my whole thought process. Truly, I do respect every philosophy, every art and every science that claims to improve a human life. I too do respect the individual right of a person to follow his own chosen course of spiritual or health related matter. I am sure that these programmes must be helping a multitude of people in some way or the other, but getting entangled in a mesh of various such theories can be lethal to the harmony of your social life. I did find out that your friends and family members do become vary of you as they are the one who bear the onslaught of your current single point agenda. Fortunately, I realised that in time as I was not willing to sacrifice my close ones so I let go of my overheating drive for intensifying my mental, spiritual and temporal self. Now everything is back in place except for the pounds, which looked like pennies when I spent them on the various courses when I was trying to be a better human being. I have come to terms with myself and as before believe in following the middle path. A correct mix of everything keeps one in the midst of his or her family and society. I am not talking about the Middle Path as propagated by Lord Buddha. Right now even the mention of a clichd name only brings back memories of the very trendy sounding courses I undertook. I do not have the courage to place a new burden on my familys troubled shoulders which, perhaps willy-nilly, stood by me in thick and thin. My husband still shudders when he sees me reaching for the advertisement section of the newspaper. Had I been not left with a meagre piece of newspaper that fateful day I would have continued to remain me myself. At least now I get to the main newspaper before him!

When I look back I wonder who was to blame for the whole episode. It certainly could not have been my fault, for after all every guru and sage says that aiming for ones spiritual upliftment is a desirable quality. My husband says it was not his fault either. He claims that the all powerful America had raised such a furore in some piece of arid land that it was his duty to keep abreast of it and hence that left me with that all important advertisement section of the newspaper. I guess, after all it is Mr Bush at whos doorstep the blame should lie.especially so in light of his not even having refuted it!