"The Slaves of Castle Plun-Darr" Wily-Kit: Wily-Kat! He's gaining on us!

Wily-Kat: If you didn't keep looking back, you wouldn't know that! Keep going! Wily-Kit: Monkian? Monkian: Impatient, little one? Heh, your turn will come! Wily-Kit: I'm taking my turn now! [throws a pellet] Wily-Kit (laughing): Monkians sure know how to fall, don't they? Wily-Kat: They could use a bit of practice landing, though! Jackalman (about the Thunder-kittens): You let them escape? Monkian: They just got lucky, that's all! Cheetara: You're trying too hard, Jackalman! Just follow your... [Jackalman charges and slams his nose into a rock] Cheetara: ...nose. Slithe: So, I face the great Panthro! I am not impressed, panther. Panthro: You're no work of art yourself, ya scaly reptile. Let's see what you got, Slithe. [after Panthro disarms Slithe] Panthro: Had enough, reptilian? Slithe: I am unarmed, Thundercat. Dare you face me the same way? Panthro: I prefer it. We'll finish this hand-to-hand... Slithe: That devil Panthro is more than I bargained for. Since I cannot defeat him physically, I must rely on my reptilian cunning! Lion-O: A Thundercat in trouble! Sword of Omens, give me sight beyond sight! ... It's Panthro! He's trying to hold off gas-maddened Brute Men! Will the Eye of Thundera penetrate stone? We'll soon know... Thunder! Thunder! Thunder! Thundercats, ho! Tygra: So, that's it. Warp gas! Panthro: I thought the Interstellar Council ruled against warp gas? Cheetara: When did the Mutants ever go by the rules? Tygra: Rules are only meaningful if people agree to follow them. Otherwise, they're just words! Tygra: These poor creatures can't help what they're doing, Lion-O. You musn't fight them! Lion-O: I won't fight them, but the Lord of the Thundercats can't run! Cheetara: Pride can be a good thing, but pride carried too far is foolishness! Lion-O: Well, the Brute Men seemed to understand the word "free" alright, didn't they? Tygra: Everyone does, Lion-O, even those who would deprive others of their freedom! Lion-O: And then the Brute Men just turned and walked away, without so much as a thanks! Tygra: Is that why you fought to free them, Lion-O? For thanks? Panthro: You wasted your time then, didn't you? Lion-O: I did not! I did it because... because it was the right thing to do! Snarf: Nobody bothers to mention that he was just following old Snarf's example, oh no... "Pumm-Ra" [after kidnapping Cheetara] Slithe: Did you get her, yes? Monkian: Yes, of course we got her! Jackalman: She's there now!

Slithe: I hope this works. Those cats are very clever, and I don't trust Mumm-Ra... but it is a good plan, so we wait and see, yes? Monkian, Jackalman: Yes. Mumm-Ra: So, the cheetah has been trapped! Cheetara, they call you, the Quick... we were not so quick this time, were we? Fear not, fast one, you shall be back among your friends this very night, and you will remember none of this! Sleep, and dream peaceful dreams, while Mumm-Ra calls on all of his strength to leave this pyramid in a new form he has never tried before! Behold! [chanting] Spirits of evil, transform this ancient body to Mumm-Ra, the Ever-Living! And now, from Mumm-Ra, the Ever-Living, to Pumm-Ra, the Puma of Thundera! Pumm-Ra! [outside] Pumm-Ra: Drink this. You'll feel better. Cheetara: What happened? Who are you? Pumm-Ra: You were captured by some strange creatures. I heard a name. 'Smithe', or something. Cheetara: Slithe! Pumm-Ra: Yes, that could be it. They drugged you, and were about to carry you off when I appeared. There were three, and I fought them off. I'm pleased that you seem to be well. And so, I shall be on my way-Cheetara: But wait, who are you? Are you from this Third Earth? Pumm-Ra: No. I am from a distant planet, that was destroyed, called-Cheetara: Thundera! Pumm-Ra: You know of Thundera? Cheetara: It is--was my home. But I thought all the other ships that tried to leave were destroyed! Pumm-Ra: All but mine. My crew was killed, and my ship was stranded in nothingness with no engines. Until yesterday, when the gravity pull from this planet brought me here. Cheetara: Then you must come with me at once to the Cats Lair, and meet my friends, the Thundercats. Pumm-Ra: I would like that. Yes. I would like that very much! [in his room at Cats' Lair, on the radio] Pumm-Ra: Do you hear me, Slithe? Are you there, Reptilian? Slithe: Yes, we are here, and we are prepared. Where are you? Pumm-Ra: Where I am supposed to be: in the kitty-cats' lair! Slithe: We must know what their plans are. If you find their war room and-Pumm-Ra: Mumm-Ra does-- uh, I mean, Pumm-Ra does not need any instructions! Just be sure you are where you are supposed to be, at high noon tomorrow. Slithe: We will be there, yes. We'll certainly be there! Tygra: Although Lord Lion-O leads us, Jaga chose me to be the head of the Thundercats' Council. This puma has apparently saved Cheetara's life, and he appears to be one of us. Panthro: Have you anything more to say, Cheetara? You didn't actually see him before you fainted, did you? Cheetara: No, that's true. But when I awoke-Lion-O: I vote we take him in! [Jaga appears] Jaga: Be not hasty in your decisions, Lion-O. Your instincts may be correct, but one does not make decisions on instinct alone. Let the facts weigh heavily on your mind, and listen to your peers with caution. Lion-O: You're right, Jaga. I guess I should take more time in making important decisions. [that night] Pumm-Ra: They must all be asleep by now. So, while the Thundercats purr, Pumm-Ra pursues. Pumm-Ra: Yes. This door would be safely locked to anyone but Mumm-Ra. They have used an

old Egyptian tomb device, unknown for a thousand years. Unknown, that is, except to one who has lived for a thousand years! [after finding the Sword of Omens] Pumm-Ra: But. it is much smaller than when I last saw it. No matter, it is mine! Pumm-Ra: Stand back, and do as I say, boy! Lion-O: Who are you? You're not from Thundera; you're not one of us! I was foolish to trust you. What do you want? Pumm-Ra: Everything! I want it all! And before this day is done, I shall have it! Lion-O: The Sword will not obey you, and without it, you are no match for me! Pumm-Ra: Hold! Your tongue speaks faster than your brain can think! Hold... and behold! We have met before, boy! And I remember! Thunder! Thunder! Thunder! Thundercats... HO! [a lightning storm occurs] Tygra: I've never seen the likes of such a storm! Panthro: It's not a storm, it's a cataclysm! Cheetara: No, it is something more! We are needed! Jaga: The Mystic Sword of Omens cannot be used for evil deeds. Attempt it, and know the wrath of Jaga! [after fending off the Mutants] Lion-O: Everyone all right? Tygra: Yes. A little dizzy, but intact. Lion-O: Well, that takes care of the Mutants for a while, but that puma's locked up our Lair. Tygra: Not necessarily... Panthro: There's another way in you haven't told us about? Tygra: The power exhaust. Cheetara: But suppose he turns the power on? Lion-O: It's a chance we'll have to take. I'll go. Tygra: I'm the architect of Cat's Lair. I know every turn, nook, and cranny of the system. Lion-O: But I have the Sword! [Jaga appears] Jaga: Ingenuity is called for, not bravery and strength, Lion-O. Tygra is right; it is he who should go. Pumm-Ra: Spirits of evil, send forth a force from the darkest depths! [a giant moth emerges from the dark world] [after cornering Pumm-Ra] Panthro: Who are you? Cheetara: What are you? Pumm-Ra: Who am I? Wouldn't you like to know? Suffice to say, that I have lived here for a thousand years. I am not the intruder; it is you who have disturbed my rest! But I have time... [transforms into Mumm-Ra] a thousand years more, FIVE THOUSAND! You cannot defeat me, for I am Mumm-Ra! And wherever evil exists, Mumm-Ra lives! Mumm-Ra lives! Mumm-Ra lives! "The Terror of Hammerhand" Snarf (sees the snared unicorn): Trouble! And no Lion-O! That boy's never around when I need him! Snarf: I'll have you know that I'm Snarf, valiant squire to Lord of the Thundercats, and I am neither a pack animal nor unnatural!

[Hammerhand slams his fist] Snarf: Just kidding! Berserker: Hammerhand, leader of the Berserkers! Berserkers! Berserkers! does not like jokes! Hammerhand: Hold! So you know each other? Bad, bad, BAD! The so-called Snarf will fall to the hammer hand of Hammerhand if you do not lower that sword! [Snarf runs away] Snarf: Hammer away! The Snarf is ready! Lion-O: I will find them, and return your baby to you. I swear, by the Code of Thundera! Old Man: The ring! Old Woman: No man has ever worn that ring! Go, and may it aid you on your journey, magician friend! Cheetara (about the Thunder Tank): Is there anything this kitty cat can't do? "The Tower of Traps" Snarf: Don't panic, Lion-O! Snarf's coming for you! [Lion-O pops out of the water and dunks him] Lion-O: See, I told you'd love it! Snarf: You scared me like that for nothing! I did my best to raise you right, Lion-O, but let's face it; you've got a mean streak in you! Lion-O: Oh, come on, Snarf, I was only fooling. Snarf: Where did I go wrong? [storms away] Lion-O: I didn't mean to scare him. I guess a joke doesn't seem all that funny, when the joke's on you. I'll have to remember that. "Mandora-The Evil Chaser" Snarf: It's probably dangerous, like the sign says! Remember what curiosity did to the cat! Snarf: That low-life beanpole picked my pocket! Crook! Lion-O: Come on, Snarf; you can't accuse someone without proof! Snarf: You need proof? Then where's your Sword? Lion-O: It's--it's gone! The Eye of Thundera is gone! But how? Snarf: He's a sneaking good pickpocket, that's how! Mandora: What do you people think you're doing? Who opened that door! Lion-O: I did. I'm sorry, I thought someone in there needed help. We chased them but-Mandora: Help? You just released three of the universe's most wanted evildoers. I left them here until they could be transported to the great Penal Planet! Lion-O: I'm sorry, I-Mandora: Never mind! What could you expect from an inexperienced oaf and a fuzzy shrimp. Lion-O: Oaf? Snarf: Shrimp? And just who do you think you are? I haven't seen you around here before! Mandora: Evil Chaser 1st Class Mandora, Interplanetary Control Force. Now, let's recover the perpetrators. Snarf: You mean us? Mandora: It's every citizen of the galaxy's business! Mandora: Everything Plutar touches eventually dies. Trees, flowers, animals! If he takes root here, the Third Earth is finished! Plutar: Mandora, your career as Evil Chaser is terminated. Who's going to help you? The cub...

or his friend, perhaps? Lion-O: Hold, Burnout creature! Burnout: Hold? Burnout never holds! Lion-O: I just need a little instruction. As you saw, I'm a fast learner. Mandora: Hop on, I'll give you a crash course! Snarf: It'll be a crash course, all right! Mandora: You're ready to solo. Expedite the prisoner, and return on the double. You can find me by following the beam from this tracker. Mandora (after letting Lion-O fly off with Burnout): I think I just made a terrible mistake. Ah well, on with it. Quickpick: For once, I'm glad to see you, Mandora. Anything you have in store for me would be an improvement over this! Quickpick: Maybe they're going to turn us loose? Mandora: I doubt that. Those holes in the roof look just about big enough... Quickpick: For your head to fit through? Lion-O: If I could get my hands on that Sword, none of this need worry. Quickpick: Fat chance! Mandora: You're the great sleight-of-hand escape artist. Quickpick: Those muttonhocks would tear me apart! And what good would it do? One sword against all these beasts? Lion-O: That is no ordinary sword you stole from me, friend. In my hands, it guarantees freedom. Lion-O (to the Pig Men): Stay back! I don't want to destroy you! Snarf: Who's going to destroy whom? Mandora: Before it's too late, Lion-O, I have to say that you'd make a great Evil Chaser! Lion-O: Thanks, Mandora. Coming from you, that's something! Tygra: Shall we use the Cat Blaster on them? Panthro: No; something they fear a lot more! "Lord of the Snows" Panthro: It's pure Thundrylium! Tygra: You're right. Panthro (laughing): It must have been part of Thundera! 100% Thundrylium! Wily-Kat: Hey! What's happened to all the lights? Panthro: Not frightened of the dark, are you? Wily-Kat: No! I--I just wondered, that's all... Lion-O: It's cold! Cold as a reptilian's smile! Slithe: Vultureman will take us in his flying machine. Jackalman: Is it safe? Slithe: You cowardly, sniveling dog! Stay at home if you cannot face your destiny! Snarf: We did it! We conquered Hook Mountain! Lion-O: That part was...easy. This looks harder! Come on, conqueror!

Snowman: Who intrudes on the Kingdom of the Snowmen? Lion-O: Lion-O, Lord of the Thundercats. I and my squire come in peace. We have braved Hook Mountain to meet you. Snowman: Luck was with you, young Thundercat. Why are you here? Lion-O: To find the meteor that landed on the mountain! Snowman: Everything on Hook Mountain is ours, whelp! Snarf: Great Seas of Thundera, the Thundercats, Lion-O! Call them! Lion-O: That would be admitting failure! Snarf: Who cares about failure? We need them? Lion-O: It's a matter of honor! I cannot call them! [Jaga appears] Jaga: Perhaps you've overreached this time, son. Lion-O: I have to fight with honor. I must earn this Snowman's friendship alone! Snowman: You fight with skill and courage, whelp! But so far, it has just been a test! Charge, Snowmeow! Jaga: Snowmeow, Lion-O! Think! Lion-O (thinking): That's right; Snowmeow is a cat! (out loud) I am Lion-O, Lord of the Thundercats! I command you to halt, snow cat! [Snowmeow stops] Snarf: It works! Lion-O has power over all cats! Snarf: We did it! We did it, Lion-O! What are you doing? Lion-O: We came to make allies and gain the meteor. I cannot make a friend of a dead man; I must see if I can save the Snowman! Lion-O: How'd you get here so fast? Panthro: Gotta ask Cheetara... Cheetara: Woman's intuition! "The Garden of Delights" Silky: How do you feel? Tygra: I feel like... I'm flying! Silky: You are flying, Tygra! Tygra: This... is... great! Hey, Thundercats! Mumm-Ra: You can have all the fruit you wish. Tygra: Thank you, Silky. Mumm-Ra: But first, you must bring me something in return: the Eye of Thundera! Bring it to me, Tygra! To Mumm-Ra! Panthro: Take it easy Wily-Kat. How do you feel? Wily-Kat: With my fingers! Panthro: No joke. Be glad you've still got them! Mumm-Ra: It is said that the Eye of Thundera cannot be used for evil purposes. But there must be way... Mumm-Ra [to the Sword of Omens]: What is your secret? Everything has a secret! Nothing is without a taint of evil spirit! [pause] If I cannot use your power, I will destroy it! Mumm-Ra: Ancients Spirits of Evil, transform this decayed form to Mumm-Ra, the Ever-Living! Mumm-Ra: Behold, the Mystic Sword of Omens!

Slithe: How did you secure it? Mumm-Ra: Let's just say, I wormed it out of them! Mumm-Ra: Apparently, the Sword does not respond to the evil touch. Slithe: Yes. We have learned that the hard way! Lion-O: Tygra designed this room so that there's no way out once that door has been sealed. Panthro: You are thinking logically, son. And sometimes logic doesn't work. Lion-O: What does? Panthro: Ingenuity! Time to plan for a rainy day is when the sun is shining! [in prison] Lion-O: If I had been more careful about protecting the Eye, we wouldn't be here now. Cheetara: Some things are beyond one's control, Lion-O. Do not blame yourself. Tygra: Have you any more of the fruit, Silky? Mumm-Ra: What could you possibly offer in return? I have it all! Tygra: You will never have it all as long as Lion-O lives. Mumm-Ra: You're probably right. Warrior maidens, prepare yourself for battle! This should be fun! Now, have some more fruit, Tygra... [Tygra pretends to eat the fruit] Mumm-Ra: Let the festivities begin! Tygra: Oh, Silky? There's one other thing I forgot to mention. Mumm-Ra: Silence him! Tygra [standing up]: The Sword, Mumm-Ra, will not respond to an evil command! Mumm-Ra: I know that? [pauses, realizing] ... What? Tygra: Yes! Yes, mighty Mumm-Ra! Willa: Lion-O! [tosses him the Sword] Lion-O: Thunder! Thunder! Thundercats! Ho! Tygra: Obviously I have a lot to apologize for. Panthro: Not you, Tygra; that was some other person. We're thankful that you had the strength to pull yourself out of it in time. Lion-O: And that you, Panthro, had the... what did you call it? Cheetara: Ingenuity. Lion-O: That's it! The ingenuity to prepare us for what was to come. Snarf: Were you scared, Lion-O? Lion-O: Me? I knew the Sword couldn't be used against me. Panthro reminded me of Jaga's warning. Snarf: But were you scared? Lion-O: Darn right I was! "The Trouble With Time" [at dinner] Slithe: Yuck! Slop! Unfit for mutant consumption! Monkian: Ooh, we need slaves, Slithe! Cooks, servants... the look of this place, a jackal wouldn't eat in this mess! Slithe: Then go, Monkian! Go! and do not come back without a few likely specimins. a woman's touch is what's needed here! Monkian: Hmph, chauvinist reptile... Slithe: What? Monkian: I-I said you're right, Slithe! a woman's touch by sundown! Monkian: A warrior woman. Alone. I wonder if she can cook! [chuckles] Alright, Slithe, one

servant coming up! This was too easy! Snarf: You usually find stuff like Thundrylium in a mine or some place, so be careful you don't fall down a mine shaft, Lion-O. Lion-O: Yes, Snarf, I'll make a point of it. Snarf: And stay out of drafts! Lion-O: I will, Snarf, I promise! Snarf: He's not a bad boy, but he never listens! Jaga: Wait, Lion-O. It's best to listen to what she has to say. Lion-O: But, Jaga, every minute I stay here I-Jaga: This is her home territory; she knows it much better than you. You should listen before you rush off headlong. Lion-O: But, Jaga-Jaga: Sometimes, you can save time, by waiting and finding out all there is to learn about a situation. Lion-O: Yes, I see that, Jaga. Cheetara: If I move fast enough, the cave won't affect me? Nayda: It's not possible to move fast enough, I tell you! Panthro: You've never seen a cheetah move, if you think that! "The Spaceship Beneath the Sands" Monkian: Do you think Mumm-Ra will really do it, Slithe? Slithe: Oh, yes. as i said, he needs us! Monkian: But what makes you so sure, Slithe? His power is unlimited! Slithe: Is it? Then why must Mumm-Ra always return to his tomb, if not to replenish that power? Jackalman: Ooh, the Sky Cutters are operational! So is the Nose Diver! Slithe: And most of our equipment can be transferred to Castle Plun-Darr intact! Now, finally, we mutants will teach the Thundercats a lesson! Tygra: Ouch! Cheetara: Sorry, Tygra! The adhesive stuff from the mutants' net takes forever to remove! Slithe: If sticky gunk is the worst thing the mutants throw at us, I guess we'll survive! [sudden explosion from outside] Wily-Kat: Ah! Hey, what was that? Panthro: SkycraftI We're being attacked! Lion-O: Skycrafts? But whose? Do you recognize them, Panthro? Panthro: Can't get a good look at their silhouettes! [zooms in with Cat's Eyes] They're Sky Cutters! Mutant ships! Lion-O: I thought all their equipment was destroyed! Panthro: Not completely, it looks like it. I'll tend to that now! [fires a blast] Panthro: Wait a minute. [to the Seaquine] Think you can pull the Thundertank off your baby? [Seaquine chirps affirmatively] Lion-O: It moved! But if the Thunder-Tank goes over the edge, we could lose it forever! Panthro: We can always replace the Thunder-Tank, but there's no way we can ever replace a life! Pull! Panthro: Now that the mutants have retrieved their weaponry, it's a whole new contest! Tygra: Hmm, they must have raised their spaceship somehow. Panthro: They couldn't have done it by themselves. Something else is behind this. Cheetara: Or someone else. Tygra: Mumm-Ra!

Lion-O: We'll have to be doubly watchful. Tygra: Yes. Evil never sleeps. Snarf: Even worse, he doesn't let anyone else any rest either! Mumm-Ra: It seems you fared no better aginst the Thundercats than before. Slithe: We had bad luck, Mumm-Ra. Our craft can be repaired, and now we can build weapons that are even more powerful! Mumm-Ra: That is not my wish! The equipment you transported to Castle Plun-Darr... you will return it to the spaceship! Slithe (quietly): No, Mumm-Ra. We will not. Mumm-Ra: You defy me, Reptilian? Slithe: Never, mighty one! We merely wish to be more useful to you! Mumm-Ra: Do you? Well, in that case... [returns to his sarcophagus] We shall see! "The Doomgaze" Mumm-Ra: Nemesis, force of darkness, come to the aid of Mumm-Ra! Give me the power to overcome the Thundercats and rule in darkness over the Third Earth. Tell me the secret force of darkness! Nemesis: You must summon the Princess Tashe. Free her from the Time Warp Prison and she will share with you the power of Doomgaze. Summon Tashe now, Mumm-Ra! Call her to you! Mumm-Ra: Tashe! Possessor of the power of Doomgaze! Come... to Mumm-Ra! Come... to Mumm-Ra! Tashe! Tashe: What do you want of Tashe? Mumma-Ra: The secret of the power of Doomgaze. Tashe: Why do you want this power? Mumm-Ra: With the power of the Doomgaze, we can control the Thundercats forever! Tashe: But I am trapped within the time warp prison! Mumm-Ra: I, Mumm-Ra, the ever-living source of evil, can free you. Tashe: Impossible! Do not taunt Tashe! No one but I knows the key to the time warp prison, and I am powerless to act! Mumm-Ra: Not so, Tashe! I too know the key! I can free you from the time warp prison! Tashe: And what is the key, o bane one? Mumm-Ra: A tuft of hair from a cheetah! Tashe: But that is not all... Mumm-Ra [laughing]: A tuft of hair, a Berbil's tear... Tashe: Still, that is not enough! Mumm-Ra [still laughing]: A tuft of hair, a Berbil's tear, and a shoe from an enchanted unicorn! Tashe: There is but one more element, evil Mumm-Ra! Know that, and you truly know the secret of the time warp prison! Mumm-Ra: A hero to take your place in the time warp. That is the final element! [after Slithe captures Cheetara in a net] Cheetara: Slithe! You slimy reptilian, I might have known you were part of this. Slithe: Silence, catwoman! A tuft of a cheetah's hair, yes... [Slithe cuts off a tuft of Cheetara's hair] [after rescuing the unicorn] Snarf: We got here just in time! Lion-O: But why did Jackalman want its shoe? Snarf: And who took Ro-Bear Belle? Cheetara: And what did they want with a tuft of my hair? Lion-O: What happened? Cheetara: Slithe set a trap, and I ran right into it. Lion-O: What did he want? Cheetara: That's the strange thing. He just cut off a piece of my hair!

Snarf: This just gets stranger and stranger! Cheetara: Then the man-o-war cloud helped him escape. Lion-O: Hmm, only one person -- one thing -- could be behind all this: Mumm-Ra! Mumm-Ra: Tashe! Taaashe! Come to Mumm-Ra, and be free of your Time Warp Prison! [Tashe appears in her boat] Ro-Bear Belle: Oh, Thundercats, save me, please! [while climbing the mountain] Snarf: Maybe there was an easier way! Lion-O: Save your breath for climbing, Snarf! You'll need it! [spotting Tashe] Snarf: Who is that? Lion-O: I don't know. But she's... so... beautiful! Snarf: Lion-O... Lion-O: In a kind of... evil way, of course! Mumm-Ra: Now, let the sorcery begin! Ancients spirits of evil... transform this decayed form, to Mumm-Ra, the Ever-Living! Tashe: O evil Mumm-Ra, free me from my Time Warp Prison so that I may share the power of the Doomgaze with you! Snarf: Lion-O! Lion-O! Monkian: A Berbil's tear... Ro-Bear Belle: No! I must not cry... [Mumm-Ra electrocutes her until she cries] Snarf: We've got to get her out of here! Mumm-Ra: Aha! I have them! Snarf: Lion-O, pull yourself together! She needs your help! What's wrong with you? Cheetara (to herself): Well, if Lion-O's not going to do anything, I certainly am! [after the Thunder-Tank is penetrated] Wily-Kit: I thought you said this thing was impenetrable! Panthro: Nobody's perfect! Mumm-Ra: Now, I have you, Lord of the Thundercats, helpless in the power of the Doomgaze! Soon you will be imprisoned in the Time Warp, roaming time and space for eternity while we rule the Third Earth and the universe! Snarf: You still got Snarf to deal with! Tashe: Puny creature, you may join your heroic master in his eternal prison! Cheetara (to Jackalman): So, it comes down to this! Cat against dog! A foregone conclusion, wouldn't you say? Mumm-Ra: Submit to a superior power, Cheetara! There is nothing you can do! [Tashe activates her Doomgaze] Mumm-Ra: With your master trapped in the Time Warp Prison, you will need our protection! [Cheetara shrugs it off] Tashe: The Doomgaze! It fails! Mumm-Ra: What? How can it be? Summon up your power! Cheetara: Your mystical powers have no effect on me. You may mesmerize men with your evil beauty, but I am a woman! You hold no mystery for me! [after being banished] Tashe: I want to be free! I only wanted to be free!

Snarf: Lion-O! You got trapped by Tashe's Doomgaze. I'd say that shows a certain weakness of character! Ro-Bear Bill's in trouble; we've got to help her! "Spitting Image" Driller: I will do business with you, evil one. My services, for your diamonds. Mumm-Ra: Such loyalty... You shall have diamonds! To the treasure room! [they go to the treasure room]Here are your diamonds! you shall have half of your payment now, the other half on completion of your mission! Driller: Enough diamonds here to keep my drill points sharp for centuries! Mumm-Ra: Of course, if you fail in your task, I shall recover these and you shall have nothing for your trouble! Then, your drill points shall grow dull, and you will stay locked under the earth forever! Mumm-Ra: Observe. The Thundercats sleep! This one, bring me the one they call Panthro! He is the one I want. Driller: Hmm, it will be difficult. The walls are thick. I'll need more diamonds to penetrate it! Mumm-Ra: No more diamonds unless you succeed, Driller! On your way! Mumm-Ra: Now, to bring this Panthro clone alive. Hammerhand! Mighty leader of the berserkers, agent of war and chaos! Come to Mumm-Ra! Rise from your watery grave and enter the body of my Thundercat clone! Fulfill your destiny of terror! Come... to... Mumm-Ra! Destroy! Destroy! Destroy! Panthro Clone: I will obey you, evil Mumm-Ra! I will spread fear and suspicion wherever I go! Lion-O: I sense Mumm-Ra's evil hand in this. I'm going to find Panthro! Wily-Kit: I'm going with you! Wily-kat: And me! Lion-O: No! We can't all look for Panthro. From the look of those screens, there's too much going on out there. Our friends need us! Tygra: Lion-O's right! We better find out what's happening. Lion-O: Panthro! You all right? What were you doing here? Panthro (weakly): I'll explain... just need a little... nap... Wolo: It's him! The Thundercat! Panthro: What's the problem? We're your friends! Wolo: Do 'friends' set fire to people's homes, uproot forests, smash fishing boats, burn crops? Is that what 'friends' do? Panthro: Me? You think I did that! Lion-O: You told me the Driller drugged you. Maybe you weren't in control? Panthro: But I was trapped in the chasm! I couldn't have done it. Could I? Lion-O: Maybe you should take the Thunder-Tank back to the Cat's Lair. I'll try to straighten this out. Panthro: You must believe me! I did not do any of those things. [Panthro leaves in the Tank] Wolo: I would not have believed it of a Thundercat, but I saw it with my own eyes! Lion-O: Whatever caused it, we will help repair the damage. Wolo: I'm sorry, Lion-O. None of us will ever trust you again. Lion-O: Panthro! Stop! You don't know what you're doing! Panthro Clone: Frightened, cub? Lion-O: You're not yourself! Don't force me to fight you! Jaga forbade us to fight amongst ourselves!

Panthro: Jaga is gone, cub! Now I serve a new master! [the real Panthro shows up] Lion-O (confused): Panthro... and Panthro? Panthro Clone: Panthro! Panthro: Yeah, the real one! Lion-O: How can I help you, Panthro? I can't tell the real you from the fake! Snarf: The Sword, Lion-O! Use the Sword! Lion-O: Not against a Thundercat, Snarf! Our Code expressly forbids it! Snarf: Exactly! The Sword will only harm the fake Thundercat! Do it Lion-O, or they'll burn! [Lion-O raises the sword] Lion-O: Jaga, guide my hand, and free Panthro! Panthro-Clone: You have deceived the spirit of Hammerhand, ever-living source of evil, evil, evil! You promised me destruction and devastation, but you gave me no power to overcome the Thundercats! Mumm-Ra: Ah! You failed, clone! And now I have no use for you! Panthro-Clone: Now, I will take my revenge! I will destroy, destroy, destroy! Lion-O: I guess I should have realized that clone could never have been the real Panthro. No true Thundercat would have done all that! Panthro: How could you know? It even had me fooled! Cheetara: Hey, imagine what would happen if one of us really did turn bad? Panthro: We just have to make sure we never do. Tygra: That's right, Panthro. The Thundercat power gives us extra responsibility. Lion-O: One thing's for sure: I'm glad you're one of the good guys! "Mongor" Mongor: No creature, no structure, no Third Earthling will escape the wra-a-ath of Mongor! Mongor is free! Mumm-Ra: Mongor terrorizes Third Earth, and wherever he finds fear, he grows in power and strength! Soon, he will be fit to destroy the Thundercats! [while the Thunder-Kittens try to unlock the tomb] Mongor: Mongor calls! Mumm-Ra, ever-living source of evil! Mongor will soon be free! Call your servant, and I will obey! Mumm-Ra: Mongor? How can it be? I have sought to free him for three centuries, and never found his prison... Wily-Kat: We got it! [Mongor appears] Wily-Kat: W-what's that? Wily-Kit: Who are you? Mongor: I am the eternal image of fear! I am called Mongor! [after chasing away the Thunder-Kittens] Mongor: Wherever fear is, Mongor grows more powerful! Mongor (to Tygra): You fool! Fire cannot harm me! Mongor (to Cheetara): Cute trick, Thundercat! But only a trick! [while reading the carvings in Mongor's tomb] Wily-Kat: Looks as if you can get him... by kind of redirecting his forces back at him! Wily-Kit: See these figures that are reflecting his power? They've all got their backs to him!

Maybe the secret is not to look at him directly. Wily-Kat: Maybe, but I sure wish we could ask Tygra about it. He could figure it out! Panthro (to Mongor): Whoever you are, you're tough opposition, but no way am I giving up! Mongor: Maybe this will change your mind! [Mongor's spell ties up Panthro] [after Panthro is defeated] Mumm-Ra: Two children, and little Lion-O: all that stand between me and my perpetual reign of evil! Lion-O: I don't like it, Snarf. None of the Thundercats have been in contact, yet we've all got communicators... and there's some kind of force out there that's blocking the Sword's vision. Snarf: What was that? Mongor (invisible): 'Some kind of force'? Heh heh heh... Lion-O: What? Mongor: What do you know about 'force', youth? Lion-O: Who are you? What are you? Mongor: I am the power of everything you fear! I am in everything you see! I am all around you! Above you, beneath you! I am... [Mongor appears] Mongor! Lion-O: Sword of Omens, do not fail me now! Lion-O: For Thundera, for Jaga, and for the Thundercats, strike down this power of fear! [Lion-O defeats Mongor] Wily-Kat: Don't look at him, Lion-O! Lion-O: No, Wily-Kat. I no longer fear his power. And without fear, he is nothing. [to Mongor] Go back to your ruined temple, and leave the Third Earth to live without fear! "The Astral Prison" Lion-O: Sword of Omens, give me sight beyond sight... [in Lion-O's vision] Nemex: Aaah, I have primed this moment for many years! Now at last, Jaga, you are my prisoner! A prisoner for all eternity! [laughs] [vision ends] Lion-O: Jaga, a prisoner! Cheetara! Panthro! Tygra! Lion-O: I have to help him, but how? Tygra: The problem is how to find Jaga! Panthro: We have to find some way of communicating with him. Cheetara: We need someone -- something -- that understand the Astral World. Wily-Kat: There's only one person like that on Third Earth! Wily-Kit: The Nether-Witch! Mumm-Ra: So, Lion-O wants the Nether-Witch to help him visit the Astral World... If only he knew that Mumm-Ra and the Nether-Witch are one and the same! (chanting) Ancient spirits of evil, transform this decayed form to Mumm-Ra, the Ever-Living! And now, sorcerers of the netherworld, make Mumm-Ra, the Nether-Witch! [Mumm-Ra becomes the Nether-Witch] Cheetara: Are you sure you want to go through with this, Lion-O? Panthro: You'll be putting yourself in grave danger. Lion-O: Jaga needs me, and if the Nether-Witch is the only person who can help me find him, I have no choice. Panthro: Well, there it is -- the Bridge of Slime.

Snarf: And that dark hole must be the den of the Nether-Witch! Tygra: We should go with you, Lion-O. Lion-O: No, Tygra! I have to do this alone. No one can help! Cheetara: There must be something we can do! Lion-O: You can wish me luck! All: Thundercats, ho! Slithe: With Lion-O out of the way, we'll never have a better chance to smash the Thundercats once and for all! Jackalman (nervously): If he is out of the way... Slithe: Why should Mumm-Ra lie? It's not in his interest! [Jackalman drops a wheel on Monkian's foot] Monkian: Watch what you're doing, you cowardly wretch! Vultureman: Relax, Jackalman! Those Thundercats don't stand a chance against the Thundrainium Cannon! Nether-Witch: So, Lord of the Thundercats, you want to enter the Astral World to free your mentor Jaga? Lion-O: How--how did you know that? Nether-Witch: I am the Nether-Witch, Lion-O, I know everything. Lion-O: Will you help me? Can you get me into the Astral World? Nether-Witch: Of course. But I warn you that once you are there, you will never return... Lion-O: But-Nether-Witch (angrily): No! Never! You will leave Third Earth forever! (calmly) You must make your choice, Lion-O. Lion-O: Whatever I have to do to free Jaga, I'll do it. Nether-Witch (chanting): Ancient spirits of the void... transport Lion-O to your Astral World! [the Nether-Witch turns back to Mumm-Ra] Lion-O: Mumm-Ra! Mumm-Ra: You will never return to the Cats' Lair, Lion-O! You are trapped in the Astral World forever! [Lion-O vanishes] Slithe: Is the Thundrainium Cannon ready, Vultureman? Vultureman: Ready, and loaded with Thundrainium shells, the only material on Third Earth that's known to weaken those blasted Thundercats! [in the Astral Prison] Nemex: Only when you surrender all your knowledge to me will I consider the possibility of your freedom, Jaga! Jaga: Never! Nemex: Brave words, feeble fool, but I, Nemex, have all eternity to change your mind! And Jaga, you can be sure I will change your mind! [Lion-O storms in] Lion-O: Not if I have anything to do with it! Brodo (from inside a cell): Help! Help me! [Lion-O busts open the cell] Lion-O: Who are you? Brodo: My name is Brodo. Many centuries ago, I was the most powerful magician on Third Earth! But my wizardry threatens Mumm-Ra's evil dominion... he tricked me, and I have been here in the Astral Prison ever since! Lion-O: Come on, let's get out of here before Nemex rallies his forces! [after they escape from the Astral Prison] Brodo: How can I ever thank you, young man?

Jaga: By Thundera, Lion-O, I never thought I'd see you again! Lion-O: Now we'll be together forever, Jaga. I can never return to Third Earth. Jaga: No, Lion-O, your place is there, not here in the Astral World. Lion-O: I have no choice; I am with you now, and forever. [the Eye of Thundera growls] Lion-O: Sword of Omens, give me sight beyond sight! [Lion-O sees a vision of the Mutants attacking the Cats' Lair] Lion-O: Cats' Lair is being destroyed! They need me, Jaga, and I'm stuck here! Brodo: I can get you back there! Lion-O: Will you do it, Brodo? Brodo: If it will repay you for saving me... (chanting) Ancient spirits of good, transport this young Lion-O back to his own world! [Lion-O vanishes] Jaga: I owe my freedom to your bravery, Lion-O. Lion-O: I don't think I'd have been so brave if I had known what I was getting into in the Astral World. Jaga: But you did confront the unknown, Lion-O. That takes real courage. It's always easier to deal with dangers you know and understand. Lion-O: Well, I just couldn't stand by and watch, Jaga. I had to do something! Jaga: I will always be grateful. Lion-O: It was no more than you did for us when you saved the Thundercats and brought us here from Thundera. [Jaga chuckles] Jaga: So, now we're even, Lord of the Thundercats! Lion-O: Jaga, wait! [Jaga vanishes] Lion-O: He's gone... I tell you, Snarf, the thought of being stuck there in the Astral World really made me appreciate our life here on Third Earth. Snarf: Mutants and all? Lion-O: Mutants and all! Snarf: Perhaps from now on, you'll keep your feet on the ground! "The Ghost Warrior" [at Grune's tomb] Bolkan 1: Those symbols were carved here, to ward off evil. Bolkan 2: We're not evil. Just poor! [after the Bolkans accidentally free Grune] Bolkan: It's him! From the legends! Grune, the Destroyer! The one who ravaged Third Earth! [Panthro gets shoved out of his chair] Panthro: All right, who's the wise guy? Cheetara: It wasn't any of us, Panthro! There's a force in here -- an alien force! Wily-Kat: And it's stronger than Panthro! Panthro: Stronger than me? Not likely! Grune: So this is what becomes of the Thundercats? Wily-Kit: Lion-O! It's a ghost! Cheetara: And it knows who we are! Lion-O: Stay back. (to Grune) Who are you? Identify yourself! I, Lion-O, Lord of the Thundercats, command you! Grune: And led by a mere cub?

Lion-O: Why did you come here, ghost? Who are you? Grune: You will know who I am soon enough, my Lord of the Thundercats! Oh yes, you will see me again! Wolo: It was Grune the Destroyer, Thundercats. He's come back to Third Earth! Bolkin: It had to be him. There's no mistaking that single saber-tooth! Wolo: He demanded that we give him Fire Rocks! Lion-O: Fire Rocks? Wolo: Yes! But we don't have any! Bolkin: It's been forbidden to mine Fire Rocks for a hundred mega-years, or more! Wolo: Their power is too difficult to control. Too dangerous! Tygra: We had something like that on Thundera. It was called 'Thundrainium'. Wolo: Oh please help us, Thundercats! We're helpless against him! Lion-O: Of course we'll help you. I'm not sure exactly how yet, but we'll do something. Lion-O: Grune the Destroyer, they call him. We must learn as much about him as he knows about us, if we are to fight him, and win. Cheetara: How, Lion-O? What we know is just legend. Myth. Lion-O: The Sword! The Sword may have the answer. Sword of Omens, give me sight beyond sight! Show us what we must know of Grune the Destroyer. [] Lion-O: Nothing. The Sword showed me nothing! Tygra: Because the Eye has no psychic powers. Panthro (looking to Cheetara): Yes... Cheetara: No! I can't. You can't ask me to! Lion-O: Cheetara? You have this gift? Cheetara: It's a curse, Lion-O! Sometimes visions just appear to me. At other times, I must bring myself to the brink of oblivion to call forth the vision. Tygra: Sometimes, it takes Cheetara weeks, even months to recover. Lion-O: Then you mustn't, Cheetara. Cheetara: This time I must. We must know who or what this Grune the Destroyer is, or risk being destroyed ourselves. Cheetara: I see... I see Grune. But not the Destroyer. He's... he's... yes... he's a Thundercat! Lion-O: Grune? A Thundercat? Never! Panthro: No way! Tygra: Shh! Don't disturb Cheetara's trance! It could harm her. Cheetara: I see... I see... Jaga! He and Grune are friends! Great friends, and great warriors, defending Thundera against all invaders! But greed overcomes Grune, and a lust for power. Grune and his army of marauders sweep across Thundera, destroying, looting, bringing shame to the Code of the Thundercats. Jaga pursues him. They clash. Hour after hour they fight, day after day... but Jaga is the mightier. Grune is banished from Thundera, set adrift in space. And... aand... it's gone! I see nothing more. Panthro: Rest now, Cheetara. We can figure out what happened from there. Tygra: Yes. His ship found its way here to Third Earth. Wily-Kat: Where he had easy pickings! Panthro: Sure. Who could stand up to a Thundercat gone bad? Lion-O: How can we stand up to him? Knowing who Grune is makes it even-[the ground shakes] Wily-Kat: What was that? Wily-Kit: The storm? I thought it was over! [Grune is smashing the Cats' Lair with his Thundrainium Club] Grune: Come meet your fate, Thundercats! Grune the Destroyer has come for his revenge! Lion-O: Your fate will be sealed by the symbol you betrayed, Grune! The Eye of Thundera! Ho!

Wily-Kit: Aw gee, how do we fight a ghost? Lion-O: Yes! How do we fight a-- wait! Cheetara gave us the answer! We fight a ghost with another ghost: the mightiest Thundercat of all! Thunder! Thunder! Thundercats, ho! [The Eye of Thundera appears] Lion-O: Jaga! Your ancient enemy awaits you! [Jaga appears] Jaga: Hello, Grune. Grune: So, I've finally drawn you out, Jaga? Jaga: I suppose we were destined to meet again. [while fighting Jaga in the astral world] Grune: Surprised, Jaga? I forged my battle-club from Thundranium. Tygra: Thundranium... Thundranium weakens us, Lion-O! Panthro: Jaga can't win! Tygra: That club will finish Jaga in moments! Lion-O: No! [Eyes flash] Jaga! Take my strength! Jaga: No! Lion-O, no! Lion-O: I command you, Jaga, as Lord of the Thundercats! I command you to take my strength! [while watching Jaga and Grune fight] Panthro: It's like they've set the entire heavens aflame! Tygra: Was there ever a battle such as this? Cheetara: I just hope Lion-O survives it! Grune: You've won, Jaga. I'll never fight you again. [Jaga turns] Grune: Jaga? You'd never turn your back on a hand extended in friendship, Jaga? Would you scorn an old friend who repents his evil ways? Jaga: No. I would not, Grune. [walks towards Grune; Grune snatches the sword from his waist] Grune: Your righteousness made you strong, Jaga, but it has also made you foolish! [Jaga's eyes glow; the Eye of Thundera obliterates Grune] Lion-O: You won, Jaga, as I knew you must. Jaga: No, Lion-O. It was the strength of the Lord of the Thundercats that one this day. As is only proper... [throws the Sword to Lion-O] Lion-O: Thank you, Jaga. But you knew that Grune would go for the Sword, didn't you? You let him take it. Jaga: Better an honest enemy than a false friend, Lion-O. You must learn which is which. Lion-O: I'll try to, Jaga. Jaga: You will, Lion-O. You will. "Dimension Doom" Mumm-Ra: Ancient spirits of evil, turn stone into flesh, blood, sinew, and claw! Wizz-Ra: After 7000 years, the hour has struck! The beautiful Cheetara and her feline cohorts will help me defeat the evil Mumm-Ra once and for all! Mumm-Ra: Behold, the Vulture King! That beam of sunlight smites his left eye! As the hours pass, the beam will move. When it smites the right eye, the single day is over! That's how little time Wizz-Ra has to regain the helmet! Snarf: The pyramid! Lion-O: Courage, Snarf!

Snarf: Right! We can handle anything! Snarf: Moons of Thundera! Lion-O's collapsed! Lion-O: Only Mumm-Ra commands me! Panthro: Only Mumm-Ra commands me! Snarf: Oh no! Mumm-Ra: Now, Panthro, let Wizz-Ra feel your strength! [after Wizz-Ra defeats Panthro] Wizz-Ra: Unless we get the enchanted helmet back, Mumm-Ra will enslave all the Thundercats! Snarf: Don't give up now, Wizz-Ra! We're winning! Wizz-Ra: But my powers grow weaker, Snarf! Mumm-Ra [spotting Wily-Kit and Wily-Kat]: The twins of mischief! Wizz-Ra: Ropes! Turn to chains! [changes the Thunder-Kittens' ropes to chains] Mumm-Ra: The Thundercats are my slaves, Wizz-Ra's powers are exhausted, and soon he must return to the Seventh Dimension... without the enchanted helmet! Slithe: The she-cat Cheetara! What of her? Mumm-Ra: Helpless, in a trance! The final triumph is ours! Mumm-Ra: Thundercats... who commands you? All [in unison]: Only Mumm-Ra commands us! Wizz-Ra: I thank you, Cheetara, for all you have done. Cheetara: Will I see you again, wizard? Wizz-Ra: Only in your dreams, beautiful Cheetara. Only in your dreams... Cheetara: I'm glad it all turned out well, but maybe if I had trusted you more, and told you about Wizz-Ra, all this wouldn't have happened. Lion-O: That's in the past, Cheetara. But in the future, we must hold nothing back from each other, if we are going to remain a team. Right? All: Right! Thundercats, Ho! "Queen of 8 Legs" [Mumm-Ra watches a vision of Spidera's birth] Mumm-Ra: Hmm? What is this? Some sort of activity in the Kingdom of Webs? Nemesis -- force of darkness, come to the aid of Mumm-Ra! Tell me the meaning of this nightmare event! What vicious evil hatches in the Kingdom of Webs, and how might I use it against the Thundercats? Nemesis: I, Nemesis, will tell you this! The Kingdom of Webs has a new Queen of Eight Legs! Spidera! Spidera! Mumm-Ra: I welcome such frenzy and hate to my dynasty of darkness! But how? How do I lure Lion-O and the Thundercats into Spidera's web of rage? Nemesis: The dark power is within you, Mumm-Ra: the evil of deception! Mumm-Ra: Yes! Yes! Ancient spirits of evil, transform this decayed form to Mumm-Ra the everliving! And now to... Diamondfly! [transforms into Diamondfly] [outside] Diamondfly: Oh help me, Lion-O! Help me! [nearby, the Eye of Thundera throbs]

Lion-O: Danger! But I don't see anything? Diamondfly: Help me, Lion-O! Help me! [begins glowing] Lion-O: Hey, turn down the lights! [dully] Pretty lights... pretty lights... lights... pretty... Diamondfly: You will help me, won't you? Lion-O (slowly): Thundercats... always... help those... in need... How... can I... help... Diamondfly: By following me... [in Mumm-Ra's voice] ...to eternal captivity in Spidera's web! Lion-O: I must help the Diamondfly. Snarf: Help who? Diamondfly: Help me, Snarf. Help me! Snarf: Oh, no, whatever you've done to Lion-O, you're-Diamondfly (in Mumm-Ra's voice): Meddlesome nursemaid! Nothing can save the Lord of Thundercats now! Snarf: You! Diamondfly: Lion-O shall walk into eternal captivity in Spidera's Kingdom of Webs! [spiders begin emerging from the darkness] Diamondfly: And you shall precede him! Snarf: The Diamondfly is Mumm-Ra! Lion-O: Mumm-Ra! Let's see you for what you are! [holds up the Sword of Omens] Ho! [the Diamondfly changes back into Mumm-Ra] Lion-O: Your fiendish deceptions have failed! Mumm-Ra: Perhaps, Thundercat, but let's see if you can rescue your nursemaid from Spidera's Kingdom of Webs! Snarf: Whoever you are, I'd let me go if I were you. I'm a Thundercat, Snarf! Spidera: Thunder-food! [a spider ensnares Lion-O] Spider: It's no use, Lion-O! They are webs of steel! Lion-O; I'll have you out in two shakes of a cat's tail, Snarf! [Spidera roars] Snarf: Run, Lion-O! [back at Cats' Lair] Cheetara: The Thundercat signal! All: Thundercats, Ho! Panthro: What on Third Earth did Spidera make this stuff from? We'll never get rid of it! Tygra: Whatever it is, it's pretty strong stuff! Snarf: But it wasn't strong enough to hold old Snarf. Lion-O: Yes, how did you break out of that cocoon, Snarf? Snarf: You know how it is. When you think you've got nothing left, you just have to... dig deep! "The Crystal Queen" Lion-O: The engine break down? Panthro: No way! When I build them, they don't dare break down! Panthro: Well, of all the-Lion-O: What is it? Panthro: Snarf was supposed to recharge the Thundrillium Module. He must have forgotten. Lion-O: He's getting a bit absent-minded. Panthro: Well, he's not getting any younger... Lion-O: Snarf... getting old? I never thought of that...

Panthro: We'll just have to cut down on his responsibilities. [back at Cat's Lair] Snarf: Where's Lion-O? Panthro: He's standing watch at the Thunder-Tank. The Thundrillium Module ran out because-[pause] --well, it's nothing to worry about. Did you reenergize the spare module, Snarf? Snarf: Of course! I know my duties! [over at the container] It's right here in the-- [finds nothing] I put it in the-- [still finds nothing] Huh, that's funny. I could have sworn... Let's see, I was cleaning up while the module was in the energizer... It's right here in the closet! [runs over to the broom closet and opens it; the module falls out] Wily-Kit: Yikes! Wily-Kat: Watch out! [Panthro catches it] Panthro: That's our only spare! Snarf: No harm done. It's perfectly okay! Panthro: Uh, I've got to get going. Lion-O will be wondering what happened to me. Snarf: I'm coming with you. Panthro: There's no need! We'll be back before you know it! [Panthro leaves] Snarf (to himself): 'There's no need'! 'Don't bother, Snarf!' I'm not good for anything any more, that's what they think! [pause] I've got, like, a feeling! A bad feeling! Lion-O! I have to get where he is, and nobody can stop me! [after Queen Tartarra steals the bird with her flying machine] Lion-O: What is that thing, Ro-Bear Bill? Ro-Bear Bill: Ohh, it's Queen Tartarra again. She's always trying to steal the Arietta Bird for her Crystal Kingdom. She wants the bird to sing for her alone. Lion-O: Why, that's the most selfish thing I've ever heard! Ro-Bear Bill: Yes, isn't it sad? She never learned that the greatest pleasure comes from sharing! Lion-O: Well, I'm not about to wait until she learns! [to the bird] Queen Tartarra: So, you'll sing for those wretched Ro-Bear Berbils, but not for me? Very well! Your feathers will enhance my own beauty, as a headdress! Guards, destroy it! Lion-O: No! Lion-O: I'm leaving, and I'm taking the Arietta Bird! Queen Tartarra: You will never leave. My treasure chamber is my pleasure alone. Even those who guard it are forbidden to look at it. Any who have seen it are doomed to remain here forever! Lion-O: I'm the exception, Tartarra. Thunder! Thunder! Thunder-[Queen Tartarra petrifies him] [finding the bird] Snarf: Oh, a bird. You're the bird, aren't you? The one that caused all this trouble? [bird sings] Snarf: Nah, no use trying to win me over! I'm tone deaf! [bird sings] Snarf: Hey, can you sing real high? [releases the bird] Okay, you're on. Give it your best shot. [bird sings high] Not good enough! Those top notes gotta through the roof! "Safari Joe" [after landing his space ship] Safari Joe: Ha, Safari Joe does it again! Another perfect landing! Tell me, Mule, can I hit a target or what? With spaceships, with weapons, my aim's always perfect! And that's why I'm the best big game hunter in the galaxy!

Mule: You're a living legend, Safari Joe! Safari Joe: These big cats you've found for more better be a decent challenge. Mule: Thundercats, sir. Safari Joe: Big cats, aqua cats, sky cats... I've hunted them all! Mule: You haven't hunted Thundercats, sir. They're different! We've never encounted life force readings like these! Safari Joe: Then get to work, you lazy mule! Do I have to set up the holo-jector myself? I should be watching prey specifications right now! A good hunter knows everything about his prey before moving in for the kill! [Wily-Kit is flying rings around Wily-Kat] Wily-Kat: You're a showoff, Wily-Kit! [after capturing the Thunder-Kittens] Safari Joe: Ha! Safari Joe does it again! Lion-O: It's all clear! Just a few more feet and... [Snarf runs out and kicks the bucket] Snarf: Ooh! Ouch! Lion-O: Ha ha, I'll never beat you at this Kick the Bucket game, Snarf. Snarf: Wanna give it another go? Lion-O: Well, okay, but you shouldn't kick the bucket so hard next time! Panthro: Yes. I've tried sound waves, alpha waves, radio waves... nothing works! Lion-O: Do you think it's the Mutants? Panthro: Technology's too advanced for them! Lion-O: Maybe the Sword can penetrate this blind wall. Sword of Omens, give me sight beyond sight! [he can't see anything] Hey, there is some sort of electrical interference! I can see it, but not through it! Tygra: Not even the Sword of Omens can see through that blind. I'm going to check it out. Cheetara: I'll go with you! [they leave] Mule: Congratulations, sir! A successful hunt. Safari Joe: Will these cages hold them? Mule: The bars are made of Thundranium, a substance that somehow weakens Thundercats. Safari Joe: Now, who's next on the holo-jector? [Tygra's image appear] Mule: Thundercat prey Tygra, the Architect: Defense systems -- paranormal strength, agility, and energized bolo whip. And invisibility. Weakness -- except when he's invisible, Tygra cannot swim. [Cheetara's image appears] Thundercat prey Cheetara, the Swift One: Defense systems -- super-speed, paranormal senses, including undeveloped sixth sense, and a power staff. Weakness -- Cheetara can maintain top speed only short distances. She is vulnerable to fire, lightning, and energy bolts. Safari Joe: These full-grown ones are dangerous! Any recommendations, Mule? Mule: Neutralize defense systems. Safari Joe: Pity the beasts. Pity them, when Safari Joe goes hunting! [after catching Tygra and Cheetara] Safari Joe: Ha! Safari Joe does it again! Cheetara: Doesn't that thing ever rest? Tygra: It wouldn't matter. This... Thundranium cage has me weaker than a kitten. Cheetara: Me too. And the poor kids... they're out like lights. Somehow, we've got to warn LionO! If only I had my staff... [Safari Joe walks by with the staff] Safari Joe: Ha ha, looking for this?

[Cheetara reaches for it] Nice kitty! Be nice, or I'll make your tiger friend into a rug. Cheetara: At least tell us why you're doing this, Safari Joe. Safari Joe: Why? For sport, why else? I'm a sportsman! Cheetara: No you're not! You're just a bully! [Safari Joe draws a gun] Safari Joe: Brave words, Thundercat! But let's see how brave you'll be with your friends Panthro and Lion-O safely behind Thundranium bars with you! Safari Joe: Mule! Who's next? [Panthro appears] Mule: Thundercat prey, the deadly Panthro! Defense systems -- paranormal strength, master of all fighting arts. His shoulder spikes are endowed with remarkable properties. Panthro is a master mechanic, but Panthro is most deadly when he uses his fighting sticks and the dangerous substances he might conceal within them! Weaknesses - Panthro fears bats! Safari Joe: Bats? That's all? Good! I love a challenge! [in the Thunder-Tank] Panthro: Moonlight's too bright. Even though I'm rigged for silent riding, I might be seen! Well, since there's nothing I can do about it, I might as well go in with teeth bared and furs flying! [loads all of the tank's weapons] [Lion-O's image appears] Mule: Thundercat prey, Lion-O, Lord of the Thundercats. Defense systems -- Paranormal abilities rivaling those of other Thundercat prey, claw shield with array of defensive properties. Lion-O wields the Mystic Sword of Omens, in which is embedded the Eye of Thundera-[the image of the Eye of Thundera shoots a lightning bolt that destroys the holo-jector] Safari Joe: Mule! What happened? Mule: Eye of Thundera object defies analysis! Safari Joe: Ha! A challenge I can sink my teeth into! Safari Joe: Perhaps I've underestimated your power, Thundercat! But what would you be without that sword? Lion-O: Release my friends, and I'll fight you without it! Safari Joe: You could not be that foolish! Lion-O: Release them! Safari Joe: The sword! First, throw down the sword, and then I'll release them! You have my word as a sportsman! [Lion-O throws down the sword] Safari Joe: Ha! Safari Joe does it again! [shoots Lion-O] Lion-O: Now we know you're a liar, Safari Joe! Let's see if you're a coward too! Come and get me! [runs into Cat's Lair] Safari Joe: Very clever, Lion-O. Lure me into your Cat's Lair, where hunting you is most dangerous! But, since you have nothing to fight with except your strength and wits, you don't stand a chance! [runs in after him] Safari Joe: You're not playing by my rules, Thundercat! Have you forgotten? I'm hunting you, not the other way around! Lion-O: All out of ammo, Safari Joe? [takes the gun from him] Looks like you ran out of courage, too. Safari Joe: Please--please don't--please don't hurt me! Snarf: Safari Joe turned out to be a big coward, didn't he, Lion-O! Lion-O: Most bullies are, Snarf. Most bullies are.

"Sixth Sense" Lion-O: But why did they try to destroy it? Tygra: Sometimes, when people come up across something they don't understand, they feel threatened. Panthro: And their first reaction is to destroy it. Jackalman (about the Control Unit): I don't like it! I don't understand it! We should get rid of it! Monkian: Destroy it, before it harms us! Vultureman: Ignoramus! We must learn from it. Slithe: I'll give you 12 hours, Professor Vultureman! If you have not unlocked its secrets by dawn, I'm going to obliterate it! "Snarf Takes Up The Challenge" Snarf: It's so quiet! Why aren't the lights on? [enters; turns on the lights and starts searching] Lion-O! [pause] Ch-Cheetara! [pause] Anybody home? Come on, stop kidding! Where are you all? [later] Tygra? Panthro, are you in there? Panthro! Where is everybody? Thundercats... ho-o-o-o? Unicorn Keeper: Slithe and his band of Mutant friends have captured the Thundercats! Snarf: Impossible! Unicorn Keeper: I saw it! It is true! Snarf: But... uh... couldn't... wasn't there anything you could do to help them? Unicorn Keeper: The Mutants are formidable opposition, even for Thundercats? What could I and my gentle unicorns achieve against them? Besides, it started in the Forest of Silence, where warnings go unheard! The Mutants began to herd my unicorns, driving them from the safety of their home. My husband, the Unicorn Keeper, went to the Cats' Lair and begged the Thundercats for help! Snarf: What can I do? Ro-Bear Bill: You're a Thundercat! You must save them. Snarf: I might be a Thundercat, but look at me! I don't have the cunning of Wily-Kit or Wily-Kat, the intelligence and strange powers of Tygra, the speed and the courage of Cheetara, or the technology or the skills of Panthro, the strength and youth of Lion-O... how can I save them, I'm-I'm just... Snarf... Ro-Bear Bill: You must use what talents you have. Snarf: Like what? Ro-Bear Bill: I don't know! You must have some. [pause] They say you can communicate with the creatures of Third Earth. Snarf: Yeah, creatures! [after Snarf frees the Thundercats] Lion-O: Too late, Mumm-Ra! Cheetara: It was a good plan! Tygra: But you made a fatal error! Panthro: You underestimated the seventh Thundercat! Wily-Kit: The bravest of us all! Wily-Kat: The Thundercat Snarf! [charging at the Thundercats] Mumm-Ra: Nothing will stop the vengeful force of Mumm-Ra! [Lion-O raises his sword] Lion-O: Except, evil Mumm-Ra, the horror of your own reflection!

"The Thunder-Cutter" Mumm-Ra: Once again, you have failed! Slithe: It's the Sword, Mumm-Ra, the Eye of Thundera. What can we do against it? Monkian: Each day, it seems to take on more power! Mumm-Ra: Sword? Sword? I'll show you a Sword! [conjures the image of Hachiman's sword] Here's a Sword! [conjures Hachiman] This is Hachiman, ultimate warrior bound to the Bushido code of honor. Slithe: You mean, he will fight on our side, yes? Hachiman: What is this place? Who are these foreigners? [draws] Slithe: Hey, watch it! Mumm-Ra: I, Mumm-Ra, Ever-Living Shogun of Third Earth, brought you here to my service. Your reward will be an empire of your own. Hachiman: My sword and my skills cannot be bought, Mumm-Ra-san. I fight only for honor, against evil. Mumm-Ra: And that is exactly why you are here! [conjures an image in his cauldron of the Thundercats] Mumm-Ra: My empire is threatened by evil invaders, and they attack my peace-loving soul! They are led by a warrior whose skill with a sword is unbeatable! [Hachiman draws his own sword] Hachiman: There is only one whose skill with a sword is unbeatable, and he stands before you! Mumm-Ra: This other warrior is called Lion-O, Lord of the Thundercats. Hachiman: So, it is truly fate who has summoned me! They call this great sword the ThunderCutter! Hachiman: Where can I find this lion swordsman? Slithe: We will take you in our machine. Hachiman: No! A samurai lives by the Bushido code, a simple, basic life. I have no use for machines! I will find him alone! Slithe: Whatever you say, sword-swinger! Lion-O: I get the feeling we're lost! Nayda: I'm taking you on a shortcut! Lion-O: Is that wise? Nayda: We have to cross the Four Day Drop, but it will save us a whole day. Lion-O: What in the world is a Four Day Drop? Nayda: You'll see! [seeing the Four Day Drop] Nayda: We call it the Four Day Drop because if you fall in... Lion-O: ...it takes four days to reach the bottom! Lion-O: Hey! Pardon me sir! As I started to cross first, I ask you please to back off! Hachiman: A samurai never backs off! Lion-O: Does that mean a samurai has no manners? Hachiman: Manners? It is good manners if a boy gets out of the way of a man! I will continue to cut this log until you back off! [begins slashing the bridge in half] What do you think of that, boy? Lion-O: This is what I think of that, samurai! [draws the Sword of Omens] Nayda: You fools! If one of you doesn't give way, you'll both wind up in the pit! Hachiman: Retreat, boy! Take your little sister's advice! Lion-O: I am not a boy, and that is not my little sister! [the bridge gives way] Nayda: What a perfect example of mindless combat! Hachiman: You stood up to me, my young friend, and we both kept our honor. Now I must go, for

I seek the Lord Lion-O. Lion-O: Why are you looking for this... 'Lord Lion-O'? Hachiman: My master, the shogun Mumm-Ra, has commanded me to destroy him and his Sword. Lion-O: Then go no further. I am Lion-O. Hachiman: What? This cannot be! How can I fight a man I respect, whose little sister has just saved my life. Nayda: You have already tested each other's bravery. Isn't that enough? Hachiman: Honor demands that I obey my lord, Mumm-Ra! Nayda: That's not honor! That's rigid, futile, and stupid! Hachiman: It is my belief, my code! And just because you do not understand it does not mean it is wrong! [Lion-O and Hachiman square off; Lion-O tries to draw his sword] Lion-O: The Sword refuses to fight you, samurai! It cannot be used for an evil cause, and this duel is evil! Hachiman: My honor demands that we fight to the finish! [tries to draw his sword] Hiyah! The Thunder-Cutter will not draw! This duel is wrong! Mumm-Ra lied! We are friends! I will go with you to fight this evil Mumm-Ra. [after capturing Slithe] Hachiman: Let me finish this worthless snake! Lion-O: No! He may be more useful as a prisoner. Let's find Willa. Monkian: How are we going to rescue Slithe? Mumm-Ra: They will expect us to attack, or negotiate. Monkian: So... which will we do? Mumm-Ra: Neither! Never do what your enemies expect. The samurai would not fight for us because of his code of honor. We need someone without honor! Abshe! Ancient spirits of war, Abydos, Abishemy, Duat! [a brilliant flash of light] Monkian: I don't see anyone! Mumm-Ra: Look behind you! [a ninja appears] Mumm-Ra: This is the ninja! If the samurai is for honor, the ninja has none. His methods are silence, secrecy, and stealth. And his weapons? Terror, and disguise! [at the warrior village] Nayda: It's just a Tabbut! [to the Tabbut] Identify yourself! Why are you here? Gumla: I am Gumla, the Tabbut. I have come to negotiate on behalf of the High King, Mumm-Ra. He wishes Slithe to be releaesd. Willa: Bring the Tabbut to me! [they do] Speak! Gumla: I bring assurances from the Mutants. All will be forgiven, forgotten, and filed away. All they ask is the return of their beloved leader, Slithe. [after finding Slithe] Ninja: The Mutant force will attack at first light. Be ready! [catching the ninja] Hachiman: Did you really think you could trick a samurai? You are finished, ninja! Nayda: What? [the ninja grabs her] Ninja: Another step, and I dive with her into the ground! Panthro: Lion-O, ho! Lion-O: Ho! Hachiman: Ho!

Nayda: Let me ask you, Lion-O. If it had come to it, who do you think would have won that sword duel? Lion-O: Why, Hachiman. He had the experience and strength. Nayda: When I asked him that, he said you, because you were young and flexible. Lion-O: The truth is, in a duel, nobody wins! "The Wolfrat" Mumm-Ra: Well, Vultureman, is it ready? Vultureman: Yes, Mumm-Ra! Allow me to introduce you to the robot, Wolfrat! He can penetrate the Cats' Lair's every defense! He is the state of the art in Mutant technology! Mumm-Ra: Ha, Mutant technology? Much good that has done us! Wolfrat: Attack! [fires a blast at the pool] Mumm-Ra: Ah! Perhaps I underestimated you, Vultureman. [holds up a potion] Get this into the Cats' Lair, and our problems are over. Vultureman: What is it? [Mumm-Ra sprays him; he shrinks down to tiny size] Mumm-Ra: That is the magic miniaturizing potion! It will turn the Thundercats into helpless Thunder-Kittens! [Wily-Kat is searching the Lair] Wily-Kat: Nothing so far, but when Cheetara gets a hunch, it's usually worth investigating! [after shrinking] Panthro: They say it's a small world, but this is crazy! Mumm-Ra: What we have here is a Third Earth pest control operations! [while fighting Wolfrat] Wolfrat: Attack! Attack! [fires lasers] Snarf: Candy fruit vs. lasers? Thank Jaga I can call on superior intelligence! Snarf: This armor better work, Panthro. Panthro: If it doesn't we're all finished! Wily-Kit: But how can we fight them, Lion-O? Our weapons are like toys now! Panthro: Not so fast, Wily-Kit! [Snarf emerges in a red armor] Panthro: The Snarf NK1 Charger: Guaranteed to strike fear into the hearts of all mutants. Lion-O: We may be small, but if stick together we can do it. Teamwork is everything. Panthro: United we stand, divided we fall. Wily-Kat: All for one... Wily-Kit: ...and one for all! All: Thundercats, ho! [after destroying the Wolfrat] Panthro: That'll teach you to bust in where you're not wanted, you mechanical monstrosity! [after entering the empty Cats' Lair] Slithe: Is this a trap? Vultureman: The Thundercats are now puny midgets! What 'trap' could they set for us? [after returning to normal] Cheetara: Now that we're up to normal size, let's cut those Mutants down to size!

Lion-O: Snarf's taking care of that! [after giant Snarf knocks the Mutants into the river] Snarf: Good riddance to bad rubbish! Snarf: What I want to know is, when am I going to get back to my normal size? Panthro: But Snarf, don't you enjoy being big? You were such a hero when the Mutants were around. Snarf: Just doing my duty, Panthro. But now I can't get into my bed, and I keep bumping my head in the doorway. Tygra: Aw, don't worry, Snarf. It'll wear off in a few days, and you'll be your normal size again. Lion-O: But, to honor you for fighting off the Mutants, I'm going to give up my chair on the Council table, and you can take my place! Snarf: Well, in that case... [gets up and sits down on the chair; it breaks he crashes on the ground] Lion-O: We asked you join us at the Council table, but we didn't expect you to take the floor so soon! Thunder-Cutter Power * by resting it on the tip the finger, it points towards the target * it can cut through stone "Mandora and the Pirates" Mandora: Pull over there! This is Officer Mandora, Evil Chaser of Control Force 5, speaking! Stand by, I'm coming aboard! [flies into the ship] Cracker: Good evenin' to ya, Officer. Eep, I'm Captain Cracker, of the Star Fish. Mandora: Mandora, Evil Chaser 1st Class, of Force 5 Control. Cracker: What's the problem, Officer? Mandora: Broken running lights, unreadable galaxy numbers, visible radioactive exhaust.... I want to see your papers, Mister. [Lion-O is watching that] Snarf: Listening to the police band? Lion-O: It's Mandora, calling in a space freighter! I'll see if I can get a picture on the monitor... there it is! Look at that old space wreck! Have you ever seen one like it? Snarf: Why... that's old X4 neutron drive! Wait a minute, look at that transeil! See how it's shaped like an ancient galleon? That's the Jolly Rogers! Lion-O: The what? Snarf: The famous pirate ship! Years ago, it plundered the planets. The captain was a renegade robot named Cracker! He was exiled to a fixed orbit, and left to space rot! Lion-O: But... he can't still be around... Snarf: No? Warn Mandora now! Before it's too late! [Mandora destroys one of Cracker's robots with her boomerang] Mandora: Cease and desist, Cracker, before anyone else is deactivated! [Mandora communicates with Lion-O by radio] Lion-O: Thundercats, here! This is Lion-O! Mandora: I'm trapped in the pirate ship, and they've overrun the guards and taken the prison! Lion-O: What can I do? Mandora: Get here immediately! Snarf: I don't like us going off alone. Lion-O: There's no other way, Snarf. I've got to get there fast to help out Mandora.

Snarf: That police person is always in trouble! Lion-O: Of course. That's the business she's in. [Lion-O flies off] Snarf: Go, with Jaga's luck! Cracker: Officer Mandora! Come out here, or we'll bust you out! Mandora: Oh no you won't! This ship is your only way out of here. You won't damage it! Cracker: You're right about that! But we have other ways! [See-Through and Rhino escort Quickpick out] You recognize Quickpick here? I'm told he's an old friend, a reformed man, and not popular among the other punishees and murderers! Quickpick: I assure you sir, I am neutral here! Just doing my time! Cracker: So, Officer Mandora, either you leave my ship, or I literally take this one time king of the pickpockets apart! Mandora: You can't threaten the law! [Rhino and See-Through start unscrewing Quickpick's hand] Quickpick: Oh! Please, sir! I'm right-handed! Ohh! Mandora: Stop that! Cease at once! Quickpick: Ohh! It's loose! Mandora: Alright! Enough! I'm coming down! Cracker: Wise decision! Rhino! See-Through! Escort Officer Mandora ashore! We'll have to have a special welcome for Officer Mandora! Parrot: Boil her in oil! Boil her in oil! [after trapping Rhino] Lion-O: What was that? Quickpick: A Rhinoceri! This prison is teeming with all sorts of monsters! All of them loose! Lion-O: I know. I got Mandora's SOS. Quickpick: I saw you come in. Uh, let's get on that Space-Bike and leave at once! Lion-O: Not before I find Mandora! Quickpick: Mandora? By now, Captain Cracker is boiling her in oil! Lion-O: What? Stay here if you want. I'm going after Mandora! [runs off] [pause] Quickpick: Wait for me! Anyway, you've got that Sword. Lion-O: The Eye of Thundera cannot be activated here, because of the magnetic field. Quickpick: You mean... we have to tackle this on our own? Quickpick: As a trusty, I had access to the prison keys. Fortunately, I made copies against just such an emergency! Lion-O: Stop talking and open it! Quickpick: With their head start, you'll never catch them! Mandora: Wrong! The Electro-Charger will catch them easily! Quickpick: ...I was afraid of that! [to Lion-O, who is walking the plank] Cracker: Keep going, boy! You've got a long walk on a short pier! Lion-O: You caught me! Mandora: Of course. Quickpick: No problem. Lion-O: Cracker is going to attack Cats' Lair, and I have no way of warning them! [Quickpick hands Lion-O the Sword of Omens] Quickpick: Will this help? Lion-O: The Eye of Thundera! You retrieved it! Quickpick: Well, I was certainly not going to let a valuable piece of property lay around with all those... uh... crooks loose!

[after trapping Cracker and his crew in nets] Panthro: Alright, mates, we've made our catch! Let's reel 'em in! Lion-O: Will Quickpick be pardoned? Mandora: I might ask the Galaxy Governor to parole him in my custody, as an assistant. Lion-O: Hear that? You're going to get to ride around on the back of the Electro-Charger with Mandora! Quickpick (sarcastically): Marvelous! Lion-O: What's going to be Captain Cracker's fate? Parrot: Boil him in oil! Boil him in oil! Boil him in oil! Cracker: Traitor! "The Return of the Driller" Wily-Kit: Look out, Wily-Kat! You'll fall! [Wily-Kat overreaches and falls] Wily-Kat: You made me do that, Wily-Kit! Wily-Kit: No I didn't! You fell because you broke the law! Wily-Kat: 'Broke the law'? Which law? Wily-Kit: The law of gravity! [watching the Thunder-Kittens] Mumm-Ra: How very charming! What a tranquil scene! The Thundercats romp and play unmolested on my planet! I shall soon put an end to this frivolity! Begone, foul image! Driller, Sand Devil of the Deep Earth, Mumm-Ra summons you once more! To the Pyramid! I await you! [the Driller arrives] Mumm-Ra: Diamonds, Driller! You like diamonds? Driller: It is not a question of 'like' or 'dislike', o mighty Mumm-Ra. Without diamonds, a Driller's drillpoint grows dull... Mumm-Ra: Yes! Dull! And when your point dulls, you are useless, correct? Driller: Yes, yes, all-powerful one! Unable to move, and buried under Earth for eternity. Mumm-Ra: I'm glad we understand each other! Then, you shall do as I say, Driller, or I shall stop giving you diamonds! Driller: I shall do as you say! Mumm-Ra: 'I shall do as you say' what? Driller: I shall do as you say... master. Tygra: Ready for the test, Panthro? Panthro: Ready! Lion-O: You sure that motor's nailed down tight? If this super-fuel is as good as Tygra says it is, it could rip that motor right off the table! Panthro: Trust me. It will never leave the table. Tygra: Ignition! Panthro: Ignition! [the motor and the table fly off and destroy half of the room] Lion-O: You did it, Tygra! Panthro: And like I said, the motor never left the table! Tygra: Red Alert! Get ready for possible evacuation of the Lair! Lion-O: What's going on? Tygra: That foul odor! I put it through the analyzer. It's ultrasolvic acid... the same stuff that's in Acid Lake! Mumm-Ra: Those accursed Thundercats have escaped the acid. But, without the protection of Cats' Lair, they will be no match for Mumm-Ra! And one hour is all it will take for that acid to turn

Cat's Lair to liquid chowder! Mumm-Ra: They escaped again, but for the last time! The only way back is over the River of Despair. This time, I shall put out their lights personally! Ancient spirits of evil, transform this decayed form to Mumm-Ra, the Ever-Living! Cheetara: Action stations! We're going into the Whirlpool of Infinity! Mumm-Ra: My time has run out. But I will never give in! I will return and wipe the Thundercats off the face of Third Earth! Lion-O: I still say something smells funny around here. Snarf: Three guesses! Lion-O: Applesauce? Snarf: Burned applesauce! We didn't get back in time to save it! Lion-O: Well... one of two isn't bad! "Sword in a Hole" Snarf: But who are they? Lion-O: Hijackers. Captain Shiner: Mercenaries... if you please. Snarf: The Sword of Omens! Why? Shiner: As I told you, I am a mercenary. I did it for the money. [Mumm-Ra appears] Mumm-Ra: And I paid the money! Snarf: You're wasting your time! The Sword of Omens does not work for evil. Mumm-Ra: I may not be able to use it, but I can certainly destroy it! Mumm-Ra: Hear me, Ankat! Anubis! Apophis! I offer up the Eye of Thundera! I consign to the deep this defender of the right, the just, and the weak! Snarf: We won't last twenty-four hours down here! Lion-O [grunting]: I'm afraid that's the idea! Shiner: This is your Captain! I would like to welcome two new engine rooms members: a lion, and a fuzzy dog! Panthro: That little joke will cost you, clown. Now I know where they are! Panthro: Stay on this course, Captain. Shiner: You're directing me back to the black hole? Panthro: Not back to it; into it! (Navy-Engineered Power Tower Under Nuclear Energy) Shiner (to N.E.P.T.U.N.E.): Sir, I demand to see your human control! N.E.P.T.U.N.E.: I am in control here. Lion-O: You mean, there is no human force in control here? N.E.P.T.U.N.E.: Fortunately not, or this plant would have broken down eons ago. Shiner (to N.E.P.T.U.N.E.): I demand officer's quarters! Jaga: The Eye of Thundera is with you, Lion-O, the source of the Thundercats' power. Lion-O: But I cannot summon it, Jaga. Shiner has sealed the eye! It sleeps, Jaga, and I cannot awaken it.

Shiner: Your young friend talks to himself? Snarf: Jaga! Jaga: Sealed or not, the Eye sleeps only until needed. Lion-O: No, don't leave us, Jaga! Jaga: The Eye sleeps only until needed! Shiner: Jump! She's going down! Lion-O: Come with us, Captain! It's no use! Shiner: I'm in command! I order you to jump! Panthro: Come on, Shiner. You don't have to go down with the ship. Shiner: Oh yes I do! Cheetara: It's sounds to me as if it took the team work of all of you to see it through. Snarf: That's right! And if it hadn't been for my cheerful optimism, we would have given up without a fight! Panthro: If that's optimism, I'd hate to see you depressed! Lion-O: I'm sorry Captain Shiner went down with the ship. He was on the wrong side, but he was a brave man. Panthro: Don't be too sure he didn't survive; he was a remarkable space seaman. Cheetara: But surely, if the Vertus was as badly damaged as you say, it was hopeless. Snarf: Yes, but what could he do to save her? Lion-O: You never know with a man like Shiner. "The Evil Harp of Charr-Nin" Charr-Nin: You have released me, young masters! I am in your debt. Wily-Kat: Uh, who are you? Charr-Nin: I am Charr-Nin, the genie of the great golden harp! [conjures flowers for Wily-Kit] Wily-Kit: Why, thank you! But why do you call us your "master"? Charr-Nin: This harp has been my prison for many thousands of years. But now, you have released me! I will grant your every wish! Mumm-Ra: So, the Thunder Kittens want to give Lion-O a surprise? Well, we'll give him the biggest surprise of his life! The last surprise of his life! It's time Charr-Nin, the genie of the harp, met Mumm-Ra, the ever-living! Lion-O (to Charr-Nin): I'll get out of here, and when I do, you and your harp will sing a different tune. Lion-O: This was our fault. We shouldn't have messed around with something we didn't understand. Panthro: It happens. Lion-O: Well, thanks for getting us out of a hole. [Others groan] "Anointment Trial Day 3: The Trial of Cunning" Monkian: It's true! He has to fight the Thundercats one at a time. If he defeats them, they will anoint him Lord of the Thundercats! Jackalman: But he's already Lord of the Thundercats! Monkian: Every Thundercat Lord has to go through the Anointment Trials. Lion-O's time has come! He's already defeated Panthro and Cheetara. Now, it's the Thunder-Kittens turn! Jackalman: Hah, they don't stand a chance against that wretched Sword of Omens! Monkian: That's the whole point! He's not allowed to use any weapons, and he can't ask for help. If he does, he fails the trial!

Slithe: We'll never have a better chance to destroy him, once and for all, yes! [while watching the viewscreen] Panthro: Lion-O should hit the maze any moment now! Cheetara: Look! There he is! Panthro: But where are the kids? [after the Thunder-Kittens slide through a chute] Lion-O: So, we start even after all, despite your secret shortcut! Wily-Kit: It looks like it! Lion-O: Any time you're ready then. Wily-Kat; We're always ready! [Wily-Kat laughs] Lion-O: That's Wily-Kat! Seems to come from the left. [Wily-Kit laughs] Lion-O: But that's Kit, from the right! Wily-Kit: Go right, Lion-O! Right! Wily-Kat: Go left, Lion-O! Left! Lion-O: Thanks just the same, kids, but I'll find my own way out. [while watching the viewscreen] Cheetara: Lion-O's still on the wrong route. Panthro: Yeah. Going through that part of the cave is almost impossible. Snarf: Look! Panthro: A vehicle of some kind. Snarf: Must be... Panthro: Mutants! Snarf: Look! Lion-O's finding his way back to the main track! Cheetara: And Wily-Kat and Kit are waiting for him, with more of their traps... Under-Man: Can you read, Over-Earth Man? Lion-O: Huh? Well, sure, I can read, but-Under-Man: You will read to us, Over-Earth Man! Lion-O: Why don't you read them your voice? Under-Man 2: One needs light to read! Under-Man 3: Our eyes can no longer bear the light! Under-Man 4: Because of you, and your kind! [Lion-O gets shocked by one of the Under-Men] Under-Man: A mild shock, Over-Earth Man. We can do worse. Under-Man 3: Much worse! Under-Man 4: Your kind forced our ancestors to hide in these caves! Lion-O: My kind? Under-Man 4: The Over-Lords! They feared our books! Under-Man 3: They sought to destroy them! Under-Man 2: Now you will read to us, until your eyes can no longer bear the light. Without OverEarth eyes, you must remain down here forever! Snarf: Lion-O's back on the track! Panthro: But look! Wily-Kat and Wily-Kit are off in one of the side caves. Snarf: Another underhanded trick! Cheetara: They're only doing what they're supposed to, Snarf! Snarf: But why do they have to do it so good? Lion-O: I can't hang on!

[Lion-O slips; an Under-Man catches him] Lion-O: You! Under-Man: We heard the cries! Under-Man 2: We'll help your friends. Under-Man 3: You helped us! Under-Man 4: You saved our books! [after Lion-O reaches the tree first] Thunder-Kittens: You tricked us! Lion-O: Yep! It's been a trick for a trick all day, but it's the last trick that wins the game! Cheetara: Panthro, the screen's gone dead! Panthro: And no signal from the Sword! Snarf: Does that mean...? Panthro: That Lion-O failed the Wily-Cats' trial? Probably. I wasn't crazy about Lion-O's chances against Tygra, even if he had beaten the Wily-Cats. Snarf: Hey, come on you guys, we don't know that he lost! [later, the Eye of Thundera flashes] Cheetara: The Sword! Panthro: He did it! Lion-O did it! Snarf: Yeah, I knew he would! Knew it all along! Look out, Tygra! "The Mumm-Ra Berbil" Jackalman: Why have you summoned us here, Mumm-Ra? Mumm-Ra: I wish to teach you a lesson. Look! A miserable record of consistent failure, Mutants. A pathetic exhibition of Plun-Darrian incompetence. A convincing demonstration of calamity, clumsiness, and cowardice. There is only one creature who can rid Third Earth of the Thundercats: me! Mumm-Ra, ever-living source of evil! And I will do it! Mumm-Ra Berbil: Fools! They're all fools! Ancient spirits of evil... transform this feeble Berbil into the one creature on Third Earth that the Thundercat Panthro fears: the energy bat! Tygra: That Berbil's no friend of ours. I wonder if it's a Berbil at all. Snarf: You mean... Tygra: Yes. Mumm-Ra can take any form. Mumm-Ra: Find your master, Snarf! Find Lion-O, and bring him home to his friends! We can't wait to see him! Lion-O: Oh, hi, Snarf! I guess you didn't find them either. Snarf: Oh, I found them all right... and we'll all do Mumm-Ra's bidding! Mumm-Ra: That piece of tin won't harm me! Lion-O: But the horror of your own reflection will! Mumm-Ra: Unlike those miserable Mutants, Lion-O, I learn from my mistakes! [puts on a pair of sunglasses] There is no reflection; nothing can save you now! Tygra: The party's over, Mumm-Ra! Mumm-Ra: This is not a failure, Thundercats. Merely a setback. And each time we meet, I learn more. One day, I'll prevail... "Mechanical Plague"

[watching Snarf jump around on the screen] Tygra: Was that Snarf? Snarf: Of course it was me! Tygra: Strange... didn't look like you! Snarf: Very funny. What are we going to do that thing anyway? Panthro: Each one of us will have one of these recorders. Lion-O: And we're going to make a holographic record of everything that happens on Third Earth. Wily-Kit: Sounds like fun, but what's it all for? Tygra: It'll be like a time capsule for future generations. Cheetara: So they can see what it was like here on Third Earth. Wily-Kat: What's the use of a time capsule, Lion-O? Who cares what happened in the past? Tygra: We can learn from the past! Wily-Kit: You see a mistake, and try not to make it again? Panthro: Exactly! Lion-O: Everybody set? Tygra: Let's go. Cheetara: Ready when you are? Panthro: Sure! Wily-Kat: We can't wait! Wily-Kit: Right! Lion-O: Okay, let's make it a great show! All: Thundercats... ho! [they split up] Snarf (to his holoprojector]: Hey! Know why ducks don't fly upside-down? Because they quack up! Get it? Quack up! Mumm-Ra: So, Lion-O wants a show? Heh, heh, I'll give him a 'show'! I'll give him... the Thundercats' last act! Mumm-Ra: Ancient spirits of iron and steel, salvage the robots and war machines of the past! Send me a mechanical plague to bring down the curtain on those wretched Thundercats once and for all! [resurrects the Giant Technopede, the War Machine, the Driller, etc.] Seek and destroy! Seek and destroy! Seek and destroy! Seek... and destroy! You may have got the better of these robots one at a time, Thundercats, they'll give you quite a different show! A tragedy! [Panthro vs. Giant Technopede "Turmagar the Tuska"] [Tygra vs. Slithe's War Machine "Return to Thundera"] [Cheetara vs. the Driller "Spitting Image" & "Return of the Driller"] [Thunder-Kittens vs. Mechanosect "Return of the Driller"] [to the camera while fighting the Mutants] Lion-O: I hope you're getting all this, because I'm not doing any retakes! [while fighting the Mutants] Lion-O: I think I've had it with this show! Time to change the scene! Thunder! Thunder! Thundercats... ho! Mumm-Ra: Cowards! Bunglers! Obviously, I expected too much from a cast of bit-playing Mutants! Rest assured, Thundercats, this was just a rehearsal! When it comes to the real performance, I, Mumm-Ra, the Ever-Living, will star... and I will not leave the stage until I have destroyed you! Lion-O: You were great, Snarf!

Tygra: The star of the show! Snarf: That's the last time I do a comedy part. Next time, I'm going to be serious. The real star! Panthro: You know what they say! Snarf: What's that? Panthro: There's a hidden Hamlet in every comic! Snarf: E-exactly! [walking away] What the heck's a 'Hamlet'? "Anointment Trial Day 4 - The Trial of Mind Power" Monkian: There's Tygra, Slithe! Jackalman: Hurry, Slithe! Lion-O has already passed Panthro's Trial of Strength, Cheetara's Trial of Speed, and Wily-Kids' Trial of Cunning! Monkian: We must stop at nothing to keep Lion-O from being officially anointed as the Lord of the Thundercats! Jackalman: Yes! If we cause Lion-O to fail, the Thundercats will be leaderless. Slithe: And Third Earth will be ours to rule as we please! [spotting the Mutants] Tygra: Mutants! Mustn't let them interfere. I should conserve all my mind power for Lion-O's Trial, but... [after watching the Mutants crash into the snow because of an illusion] Snarf: I don't get it! Why did the Mutants do that? Panthro: Tygra had something to do with that, if I'm not mistaken. One of his illusions! Wily-Kat: Why hasn't he ever used these illusions before? Panthro: Using his mind power is a terrible strain on Tygra. He's been storing up all his mental energy for today's Anointment Trial. Lion-O (thinking): Daybreak! Well, if my mind isn't prepared for Tygra's mind power now, it's too late to do anything about it! [looking at the map] The Desert of Sinking Sands lies on the other side of those mountains. I must get there before sundown. And Tygra will, somehow, be trying to stop me all along the way. Tygra: Ho, Lion-O! Lion-O: Ho, Tygra! I'm ready. Tygra: Have you focused your mind, Lion-O? Lion-O: I've tried to remember everything you taught me, Tygra! Tygra: The Lord of the Thundercats must be able to tell what is from what is not. Have you prepared yourself? Lion-O: That's what we're here to find out. Tygra: I am allowed to tell you this, Lion-O: Before this day is over, Lion-O, you will face your greatest fear. Lion-O: But... I fear nothing. That I know of. Tygra: We shall see. Let the Trial begin! Panthro: No way Lion-O can ever match Tygra in mind power. The Tygra clan of Thundercats have a special gift for it. Wily-Kat: Well, then how can Lion-O possibly win today's Trial? Panthro: By being able to resist the illusions created by Tygra's mind. Lion-O: A blizzard! I can't tell if this storm is real or another of Tygra's illusions. Either way, it's cold. No! Can't let myself feel it. Concentrate! It's not cold! It's not cold... it's freezing, is what it is! There is no blizzard. It doesn't exist! It's... getting worse! Tygra (chanting): Make him see what is not there! [sees giant snowflakes] Lion-O: Snowflakes can't be that big! It's Tygra's doing; he's making me see what is not there. There are no giant snowflakes! The blizzard is not... is not... is...

[the blizzard vanishes] Tygra: So much for the warmup! Now, for the game! [after dropping his belt next to Snowmeow] Lion-O: That arch! It's on my map; I'm still headed in the right direction. [looks down] My belt! I've got to go back for it! Monkian: I'm telling you, Slithe. There was nothing left of Lion-O but his belt! Jackalman: We've seen the last of him! Slithe: We've thought so before! Jackalman: You'd be convinced of it too, Slithe, if you'd seen that cave beast! Slithe: I'll never be convinced, until I see for myself, yes? [in his vision] Lion-O: It's not night... I'm in space! Going to... crash! [sees Planet Thundera] I can't see where I'm... [spots the scene] That's Thundera! I've come back, in time and space. It's happening again! It was Jaga who saved me; he got me aboard the spaceship, just in time to see my beloved Thundera blown into space dust. It's my nightmare, it's waken me in terror ever since! I hid my fear then, as I hide it now... Tygra (voiceover): Because... before this day is over, you will face your greatest fear! Lion-O: My greatest fear is... that I'll be afraid again! But I fear it no more! Do you hear me, Tygra? My nightmare is over! Lion-O: Now that I have survived the Trials of all the Thundercats, I wonder why they were so important. It is our tradition. Lion-O: Tradition? Tygra: Yes, Lion-O. It gives our lives form, tells us who we are and what we must do. "The Transfer" Ship: Off-course! Alert! Off-course! Alert! Mumm-Ra: "The Mountain" Mumm-Ra: It seems you have given up your fight to possess the Sword of Omens, Mutants! Monkian: That's not true, Mumm-Ra! Jackalman: But the Thundercats are cunning! Slithe: Mutants never give up! Mumm-Ra: Enough! Look! [conjures an image of Lion-O on a mountain] Lion-O is so bored that he has taken to rock-climbing to introduce an element of danger into his life! So much for any threat you pose! Slithe: As it happens, Mumm-Ra... [glares at Monkian and Jackalman] We were planning a little surprise for the Lord of the Thundercats! Mumm-Ra: If you don't succeed this time, Slithe, I will destroy Castle Plun-Darr and banish you miserable Mutants from the face of Third Earth. You will roam the galaxies for all eternity! Bring me the Sword of Omens! [on the Mountain] Slithe: Welcome, Thundercat. Lion-O: Slithe! Slithe: The Sword of Omens, if you please, yes? Jackalman: Unless you'd like to do some sky-diving! Lion-O: If you want the Sword of Omens, Mutants, you'd like to take it from me!

[seeing the Thundercats' signal in the sky] Panthro: This looks like real trouble! Emergency power! Monkian: You have no choice, Thundercat. Your friends can't save you now! Tygra: Think again, Mutant! [the Mutants turn and see Tygra and Panthro on the ledge behind them] [while they're falling off the Mountain] Lion-O: If you'd only let go, I could save us! Jackalman: Never! I want that Sword, Thundercat! Jackalman: Ah! The current! Help! It's dragging me-Lion-O: So long, Jackalman! Jackalman: Help! Please, help me! Lion-O: [pause] Oh, heck! [swims off to rescue Jackalman] [after stealing the Sword of Omens] Jackalman: You cannot resist the cunning of Jackalman, Sword of Omens! The Eye of Thundera is mine! I have the power of the Thundercats! Plun-Darr! Plun-Darr! Plun-Darr! Jackalman, ho! [the Thundercats see Slithe and Monkian shooting the rocks] Tygra: Slithe! Monkian! Panthro: Stop that, you idiots. Slithe: Who are you calling 'idiots'? Panthro: You're just melting those fallen rocks into one solid mass! Tygra: We'll never get out of here if we waste our energy fighting each other. We're going to have to work together! Slithe: Never! Tygra: In that case, we'll perish together! Monkian: He's right, Slithe! Panthro: A truce, then. Monkian: A truce! Slithe: Only until we get out of here, yes? [while walking through the forest] Jackalman: I can hear Slithe, now! [imitating Slithe] 'Jackalman, you seized the Sword of Omens! How did you do it?' [normal voice] 'Easy, Slithe! Like taking candy from a baby!' Jackalman, Lord of the Mutants! Panthro: Get off your tail, Slithe! You want to get out of here? You have to work to save your hide! I'm not going to do it all for you! Slithe (panting): It's s-so airless in here, Panthro. I-I can't breathe... Tygra: We are getting low on oxygen, Panthro. Monkian: We're doomed! Trapped in here forever! We'll never get out! Tygra: We'll never get out if you panic! Just keep working steadily. [Panthro picks up Slithe] Panthro: Move it, reptile! Start digging! Slithe: Get your hands off me, Thundercat. You'll be in big trouble when Jackalman gets us out of here! [Panthro laughs] Panthro: Jackalman? He couldn't get you out of a wet paper bag! Lion-O will get here first! Jackalman: Ho! [the Sword does not respond] Useless! But at least if I've got the Sword, Lion-O doesn't!

[at the Cave] Lion-O: You miserable, cowardly-Jackalman: Don't come any closer! Lion-O: I saved your life! Jackalman: Never do a favor for a favor. [Lion-O roars] Jackalman: One step closer, and I'll finish you with your own Sword. Lion-O: The Sword of Omens cannot be used for evil. [Jackalman falls off the cliff] Jackalman: Save me! Lion-O: Let go of the Sword and grab my hand! Jackalman: You'd drop me! I don't trust you! Lion-O: You have no choice! [Jackalman reaches and almost falls] Jackalman: No! You promised! [Lion-O pulls him up] Lion-O: It's more than you deserve, but Thundercats have a code of honor. Jackalman: We Mutants have no such handicaps, so you needn't expect any thanks from me! Lion-O: I didn't do it for thanks. Especially not for Mutant thanks. [after rescue] Lion-O: Let's get you two guys back to Cats' Lair. Slithe: Not so fast, Thundercats. We still have a score to settle, yes? Jackalman: The Sword, Lion-O! Lion-O: You never learn, do you? Slithe: Open fire! [their guns don't work] Panthro: Problems, Slithe? Tygra: We took the precaution of unloading their weapons back at the cave. Lion-O: Good thinking! Panthro: Now it's our turn. [pulls out his nunchucks] Monkian: You wouldn't attack an unarmed Mutant, would you, Panthro? Panthro: Try me! [the Mutants flee] "The Demolisher" Mumm-Ra: Follow the ball of light, Demolisher, and I will show you a fighter you will never defeat. Dirge: It may be a trick! Demolisher: It may be a fight! Demolisher: Show me this cub! Let me see his toy sword! I will demolish him! Dirge (chanting): Demolish the cub! Demolish the cub! Demolish the cub! Demolisher: A fool and his sword are soon parted! Dirge (to Snarf): Stay out of this, Furball! He'll finish you next time. [Snarf slaps him] Dirge: Oh! Don't take it out on me. I'm strictly a cheerleader! Lion-O: Why are you fighting me? What have I done to harm you? Demolisher: I fight you because you exist! But soon, you will not exist! Demolisher: There's nothing better than a good fight. Lion-O: But why?

Demolisher: If you don't fight, you don't conquer. And if you don't conquer, you don't exist! Demolisher (about the Sword of Omens): A harmless toy, for a harmless boy! Demolisher: Surrender, and I will spare you. Lion-O: Thundercats never surrender! Demolisher: Then you will be destroyed! Demolisher: Another victory for the Demolisher, the greatest fighter in the galaxy! Lion-O: So what? Who will know? Demolisher: I will know! Lion-O: And after me? Who next? Will you fight forever, for no cause? Demolisher: Ha! Forever! Demolisher: Too frightened to fight without your friends, coward? Lion-O: I'm no coward, Demolisher. I called my friends to save you, not to save me. Demolisher: To save me!? Lion-O: Force me to fight on, and I will surely destroy you! Demolisher: You're finished! Lion-O: Fight, Demolisher. But one day, you'll meet your match. And your string of worthless victories will be ended by a pointless defeat. Demolisher: It's all I know. It's all I can do. Without fighting, I am nothing! Lion-O: Then fight for a cause, Demolisher. Something you believe in. Demolisher: Never! I have no cause! I believe in nothing! I have nothing but strength! Lion-O: He was brave and formidable. I wish he'd joined us in our struggle to spread the Code of Thundera. Justice! Panthro: Truth! Cheetara: Honor! Tygra: And loyalty! All: Thundercats, Ho! Snarf (chanting): Victory to Lion-O, Lord of the Thundercats! Victory to Lion-O, Lord of the Thundercats! Tygra: If you want the drum, you have to fight for it! Lion-O: Now that's what I call a cause! "Tight Squeeze" Jackalman: Fire, Slithe, fire! If they get too close, the Thundranium shells won't work! Slithe: I'm running this ambush! Slithe: Save me! Save me! Lion-O: Shall we, Panthro? Panthro: Well, it's the right thing to do, even if it is a mutant! [after losing another fight] Slithe: Your technology was faulty! Vultureman: That's it! I've had it! You don't like my machines? The weapons I've built? Then see how well you do without them! Everything I've ever built, everything I've had to fix after your clumsy efforts contains a self-destruct circuit. And I have just destructed them! Lion-O: Come on, Snarf. No need to wait for Panthro. You're not scared, are you? Snarf: Of course not! Just terrified!

Jackalman: You've had it, you wretched Snarf! I'll show you what a Jackalman can do! Lion-O: Panthro! Cheetara! Not here, either; what happened to them? Slithe: We happened to them, Thundercat! Mumm-Ra: You may win today, Thundercats, but Mumm-Ra lives forever, and my time will come! Lion-O: We'll be ready, Mumm-Ra. Snarf: I'm never going into a kitchen again! I'm going on a diet! Wily-Kit: You mean, no more candy-fruit? Snarf: That's right! Wily-Kat: No more bread fruit, smothered in fresh honey? [Snarf moans] Wily-Kit: No more meat fruit roasts... Wily-Kat: ... with Snarf's secret seasoning? [Snarf moans] Lion-O: But I thought you were going on a diet? Snarf: I am... starting tomorrow! "Anointment Trial Day 2: The Trial of Speed" Jaga: If you are to be anointed as the true Lord of the Thundercats, you must pass all the Trials, Lion-O. Lion-O: But that means fighting and competing with my friends! Jaga: It is an important learning experience for you. Without the Sword, you will have to use ingenuity in addition to courage and strength. Lion-O: But I'm not better than the other Thundercats! Jaga: You don't have to be better, Lion-O, but you do have to prove your leadership qualities. Lion-O: And... if I fail? Jaga: You will fail, if you give up before you even begin. [while Lion-O wrestles with the Mandragora plant] Willa: Lion-O! We're coming to help! Lion-O: No! Don't help me! Nayda: Too proud to take help from women? Willa: I don't know. I didn't think Lion-O was like that! Lion-O: Cheetara! Cheetara: Lion-O! Why are you standing there? There's still five miles to go. Lion-O: I know. Cheetara: Then you know what that means? Lion-O: Yes. Cheetara: And... you concede defeat? Lion-O: No. I haven't lost until you've won, Cheetara. Cheetara: In that case, it's almost sundown, Lion-O! Lion-O: Yes. Let's do it! Cheetara: One! Two! Three! Go! Lion-O: You threw me that race, Cheetara! Cheetara: How dare you say that to me? The Code of Thundera forbids it! Lion-O: Then how could I win? It's not possible to run five miles faster than you. No creature living can do it! Cheetara: No, but I can't maintain my top speed for much more than two miles. The distance we ran was too much for me.

Lion-O: It was almost too much for me! Cheetara: But you didn't give up! You truly earned my insignia this day! Lion-O: I may lose, but it won't be because I gave up! Lion-O: I'll do my best. But even if I win, I'll never forget that you are my friends. Everything I am, I owe to you. All: Thundercats, ho! "The Rock Giant" Mumm-Ra: Thunder? Lightning? Storm? And fire? Something evil stirs deep in Third Earth! Lion-O: Snarf, where are the Thunder Kittens? Snarf: I don't know! Don't I have enough trouble looking after you? Lion-O: I don't like to run away from anything. Wily-Kat: That's not anything, Lion-O. That's--that's awesome! "Jackalman's Rebellion" Jackalman: Bye, bye, mutants! This time, I'm going solo! Wolo: General Jackalman will destroy us, if we don't submit to his rule. Snarf: General Jackalman? That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard! Lion-O: Cheetara, can you catch Mole Master before he reaches the forest? Cheetara: Gentlemen, place your bets! Tygra (after Driller digs a hole to escape): I guess he wants to bury our differences! Panthro: Looks like we overdid it with the help! Lion-O: You can never have too many friends! Cheetara: I wonder what will happen to Jackalman now? Tygra: One thing's for sure -- he's run out of friends this time. Cheetara: Justice. Tygra: Truth Panthro: Honor. Lion-O: And especially, loyalty. All: Thundercats... HO! "Monkian's Bargain" Mumm-Ra: Power has its price, Monkian. Are you prepared to pay the price? Monkian: I'll pay! Power is worth any price! Mumm-Ra: Any price? Monkian: Give me the spheres, Mumm-Ra! If they work, I'll pay anything! Monkian (to Tygra): Cats don't always land on their feet! Monkian: I am invincible! Mumm-Ra: Power has its price! Remember our bargain, Monkian?

Monkian: I am not afraid of our little bargain, Mumm-Ra. Tell me the price of my power. I will pay now! Mumm-Ra: You rule Third Earth, but it is a kingdom you can never see, because you will never leave my pyramid! That is the price of your power, Monkian! Lion-O (to Mumm-Ra): Behold, the horror of your own reflection! Wily-Kit: But what if we couldn't get the sword back from Monkian? Wily-Kat: Then he would have ruled Third Earth forever! Tygra: Don't be so sure of that, Wily-Kat. Some creatures are ready for power. Some... aren't. Panthro: Yeah! Monkian tried to make his own bargain with the sword.. but he just couldn't cut it! "Out of Sight" Tygra (as Ghost): Jackalman! You miserable creature! You have imprisoned Willa, the Queen of the Warrior Maidens! Jackalman: It wasn't me! Tygra (as Ghost): Release her! Or you will feel the wrath of the jungle spirits! Jackalman: I will! I will! Jackalman: I'm telling you, I was attacked by a ghost! Vultureman: Ghost!? Ah, my beak! Never heard such nonsense! You two fools let her escape! Willa: All right, you two. We're miles from the castle now; you can make yourself visible again. Nayda: Good idea! I've had enough of being heard but not seen! Vultureman: You'll never beat Lion-O with brute force! What's needed is a spark of imagination! Lion-O: You're outnumbered, and outgunned, Vultureman! Vultureman: You win this time, Thundercats! But one day, I'll get you, even if I have to do it without those superstitious fools! I'll get you! Lion-O: What was it like, being invisible for so long? Tygra: Well, invisibility has its uses, but as a way of life... Nayda: ...I just can't see it! "Turmagar the Tuska" Panthro: We heard the alarm. Lion-O: Who are you? Turmagar: I am Turmagar the Tuska! Cheetara: Why are you here? Turmagar: I need your help. Lion-O: What can we do? Turmagar: My people cannot live without water, but our water sources in Tuskania are under constant attack from a fearsome war machine, the Giant Technopede! Panthro: You want us to eliminate this Technopede? Turmagar: If you do not help us, rivers will dry up, fertile lands will turn to desert, crops will die... my people will not survive. Lion-O: We'll help you, Turmagar. We'll smash the Giant Technopede. Panthro: Take the Thunder-Tank, Lion-O. Sounds like you'll need it. I'll stay here and fix this... monster. Turmagar: That, sir, is not a monster. He is a Gumdrop, loyal and brave. My ancestors domesticated Gumdrops many centuries ago. Panthro: Well, Turmagar, whatever it-- um, he is, I'll fix him up while my friends take care of your Technopede!

Cheetara: A Black Widow Shark! Tygra: I've got something for her. [presses a button] Kind of a... shock! [activates the electric charge weapon] [the mysterious singing is coming from a mermaid] Cheetara: A mermaid! Turmagar: I have heard many legends concerning her hypnotic powers. Snarf: I don't think we should hang around here too long. Lion-O: You're right! Hey, where's Tygra? [they see Tygra walking towards the mermaid] Cheetara: We have to stop him! [after defeating a sea snake] Lion-O: Now, for vampire mermaid! [after being rescued] Tygra: That was close! Thanks! Snarf: Let's hope that's the end of the whole fishy business! Tuska Soldier 1: The Giant Technopede! I'm getting out of here! Tuska Soldier 2: No! We cannot desert our posts! That would betray Turmagar's quest for help! Tuska Soldier 1: What can anyone do against the Giant Technopede? Turmagar: My city is in ruins! We are too late! The Giant Technopede has conquered my people! We can no longer protect the source of the river, and the lands will wither and die! Lion-O: Hang in there, Turmagar! We'll straighten it out! Cheetara: Don't give up now! Snarf: Not while the Thundercats are pulling with you! [spotting the Technopede] Wily-Kat: Look at that thing! It's all legs! Wily-Kit: Well, let's pull them out from under! [at the spring] Turmagar: There! It is to protect springs like this that you fought so gallantly. Wily-Kat: Don't look like much, does it? Turmagar: But without such natural resources, however insignifcant they seem, life would not go on. We owe you more than you can say, Thundercats. "Divide and Conquer" Slithe: That voice imitator is the best idea I've ever had! Vultureman: Your idea? I invented it! Slithe (to Cheetara): Looks like we have you caught in a sting operation! Wily-Kat: Do you have any more sneeze dust? Wily-Kit: Sneeze dust? Can't you think of anything better than that? Panthro: I think this has caused enough trouble for one day. Tygra: No. We caused most of the trouble ourselves, because we didn't call for help and try to work out a plan together Panthro: You're right! Come on, let's go home. "Dream Master"

Mumm-Ra: Ancient spirits of evil, transform this decayed form to Mumm-Ra, the Ever-Living! Ancient spirits of the Dream World, transform Mumm-Ra, the Ever-Living to Mumm-Ra, the Dream Master! Panthro (to Mumm-Ra): I'll obey you if and when you catch me! Mumm-Ra (repeated): Sleeping Thundercat; I, Mumm-Ra, the Dream Master, command your dream-self to appear before me! Panthro: Maybe a little ice will cool off those mutants. Lion-O: You want ice? I've got ice! Panthro: Fire at will. Don't wait for the whites of their eyes! "Mumm-Rana" Wily-Kit: The Mutants are going to ram us! Panthro: Changing to orbital course to wreck us? Got to tickle 'em with the Cat's Whiskers! Mumm-Rana: Welcome, good people? Jackalman: Ha ha, 'good people'? Us? Slithe: Who are you? Mumm-Rana: I am Mumm-Rana the Merciful. Do I get no thanks for saving your lives? Slithe: Mumm-Rana the Merciful? We are Mutants from the planet Plun-Darr! We have no need for thanks! Mumm-Rana: Then you are evil, and I have no need for you! (chanting) Ancient spirits of goodness, transform this gentle form to Mumm-Rana, the Ever-Good! [she transforms] Leave here, Mutants from the planet Plun-Darr. Go! Slithe (about Mumm-Rana): She's powerful! Monkian: Just like Mumm-Ra! Mumm-Ra: Nicely done, Mumm-Rana the perfect! Mumm-Rana: You know of me? Mumm-Ra: I am Mumm-Ra! I know everything! Slithe: She's good, Mumm-Ra! Perhaps we can use her to seize the Sword of Omens, yes? Mumm-Ra: But first, she must be tamed! (to Mumm-Rana) So, good Mumm-Rana, now that we have met, we must work together! Mumm-Rana: I do not know you, and I do not need to work with you. Mumm-Ra: You will obey me! Mumm-Rana: Never! [Mumm-Ra blasts Mumm-Rana] Mumm-Rana: Good shall never succumb to evil! [they have a magical duel and Mumm-Ra wins] Mumm-Ra: You are in my power. Mumm-Rana (dully): Yes, my lord Mumm-Ra. Mumm-Ra: The Mutants of Plun-Darr are your friends! Mumm-Rana (dully): The Mutants of Plun-Darr are my friends. Mumm-Ra (dully): The Thundercats of Thundera are your enemies! Mumm-Rana: The Thundercats of Thundera are my enemies. [Mumm-Rana teleports the Thundercats into the wilderness] Mumm-Rana: Thundercats, you are condemned to wander in exile for all eternity! [in the wilderness]

Snarf: Can't we g-get out of here, Lion-O? Lion-O: And go where? By the looks of this territory, the closest thing is Castle Plun-Darr; we wouldn't get a warm welcome there! And I've lost the Sword of Omens. Jaga: No, Lion-O. [Jaga appears] Lion-O: Jaga! Jaga: You can regain the Sword. Lion-O: How how, Jaga? Mumm-Rana is too powerful! Jaga: Mumm-Ra controls her with an evil spell. But she is good. Remember. Lion-O; she is good! Slithe: Monkian, you will plunder the Western section. Jackalman, you will seize the North. I will take the rest for myself! Jackalman: Wait! We'll split Third Earth evenly! Slithe: Silence! I heard something! [Tygra moves invisibly towards them, carrying a letter] Jackalman: W-what is it? Slithe: A spirit, coming toward us! [Slithe takes the letter and reads it] Slithe: It's from Mumm-Ra! It says that the richest Tabbot of all will ride tomorrow through the Forest of Unicorns. We are to summon Mumm-Rana and attack! Tygra (thinking): They fell for it. Lion-O's plan is working perfectly! Mumm-Rana: Thundercats are my enemies! Lion-O: No, Mumm-Rana! We're your friends! [Mumm-Rana blasts Lion-O] Lion-O: We are not your enemies! They are your enemies! They tricked you! Break free of Mumm-Ra's spell. You saw the Mutants attack me; that proves that they are evil! Slithe: Don't listen to them, Mumm-Rana! [Mumm-Rana breaks free of the spell] Mumm-Rana: You lied to me! Slithe: Grab her! [Mumm-Rana captures the Mutants] Mumm-Rana: They tricked me, Lion-O. Now I will free your Sword of Omens. Mumm-Rana (chanting): Ancient spirits of goodness, free the Sword of Omens from its prison! Mumm-Ra: Now, good Mumm-Rana, let us see how powerful you really are. [Mumm-Ra blasts Mumm-Rana; Lion-O moves to help] Mumm-Rana: No, Lion-O! This is my fight -- good against evil! Mumm-Ra: Good can never withstand evil, Mumm-Rana! [Mumm-Ra strikes her down] There is nothing you can do, Thunder-Cub! Evil will prevail! Lion-O: Never! [the Feliner flies by and Mumm-Ra sees his own reflection in the ship] Lion-O: It's Mumm-Ra's reflection! He cannot withstand the face of his own evil! [Mumm-Ra flees from battle] [after bringing Mumm-Rana: You saved me, Lion-O. If ever you need my power, you have only to summon me. Lion-O: I won't forget that, Mumm-Rana. Mumm-Rana: We can only defeat evil if we work together. "The Shifter" [after Snarf falls off a ladder and drops a tool] Panthro: How come every time there's a big job to do around here, I'm stuck with you? Snarf: You'd see things differently if you were me, Panthro!

Panthro (in Snarf's body): Are you okay, Snarf? Snarf (in Panthro's body): No I'm not! Panthro: We've been switched! Snarf: What? Panthro: I've got your body! Snarf: And I've got yours! How did it happen? Panthro: I don't know. But I can guess who's behind it! Jackalman: What is that, some kind of noisemaker? Vultureman: It's the shifter! It shifts people into each other's bodies! I've just switched Snarf and Panthro! Slithe: What nonsense! Jackalman: What do you mean? Vultureman: I mean, I put Snarf's feeble mind in Panthro's powerful body! And all Panthro's skills in Snarf's useless carcass! Slithe (to Jackalman): I believe he's lost his mind, yesss... Vultureman: Lost my mind, have I, Slithe? Allow me to give you a demonstration! [Vultureman blasts Slithe and Jackalman with his invention] Jackalman (in Slithe's body): Ah! I feel so slimy! Slithe (in Jackalman's body): Watch it, Jackalman! This scrawny body of yours is no bargain! Change us back, Vultureman! I've had enough of this! Vultureman: I... uh... haven't worked that bit out yet! Slithe: What? Do you think I'm going to live the rest of my life in this cowardly body? Jackalman: Hyah! Hold the insults, Slithe! Vultureman: Have a little faith in mutant technology, Slithe. Somehow, I'll change you back! Slithe: Somehow? Snarf: Use your tail, Panthro! Your tail! I mean... my tail, I guess! [Panthro does] Panthro: Hey, it works! I'll never underestimate you again! Panthro: All right, mutants! I've going to teach you a lesson! Vultureman: You couldn't teach us to knit! Monkian (to Panthro): I'm going to put your lights out this time! Lion-O (in Wily-Kat's body): Quick, Wily-Kat, give me the sword! Thunder! Thunder! Thundercats, Ho! Slithe: It's useless, cub! Give it to me! Lion-O: You try it, Wily-Kat. Wily-Kat (in Lion-O's body): Thunder! Thunder! Thundercats, ho! Lion-O: We'll have to do it together, Wily-Kat. [together] Thunder! Thunder! Thundercats, ho! Monkian (in Vultureman's body): I can't fly this thing! Vultureman (in Monkian's body): Pull the control stick back! No, back! Back, you fool! Not forward! Slithe: Back! Back to Castle Plun-Darr! And if Vultureman doesn't give me back my body, I'll grind his beak to birdseed! [after everyone is back to normal] Panthro: Sure is good to be back where I belong. Snarf: You said it, Panthro. There's no place like... home. Lion-O: Thanks to the Sword, we're all back where we belong!

[Tygra, Cheetara, and Wily-Kit run up] Tygra: We saw the Eye... Cheetara: ...is there trouble? Lion-O: There was, but, uh, we took care of it. Cheetara: You shouldn't always take try to handle things by yourself. If I were you-Panthro: If you were Lion-O, Cheetara, we'd all be back where we started! "The Superpower Potion" Vultureman: Hah, my time has come! [drinks the Superpower potion] With my Superpower Potion, I'll be able to match those wretched Thundercats skill for skill and strike! Eh, I don't need Slithe, Monkian, or Jackalman! As for Mumm-Ra, I'll rattle that mummy's bones til he surrenders Third Earth to me, Vultureman! Tygra: Vultureman! Flying? Vultureman: 'Flying' is just for starters, Thundercat! [picks up a boulder and hurls it at Tygra] [something is smashing the Black Pyramid's roof] Mumm-Ra: Who dares disturb the sleep of Mumm-Ra? By all the Pharaohs, someone will pay for this! [checks his magic cauldron and sees Vultureman outside dropping boulders on the Pyramid] Vultureman: Hey, Mumm-Ra, you bag of bones! Mumm-Ra: Vultureman! [Vultureman flies in and shoves Mumm-Ra back into his sarcophagus] Mumm-Ra: Why, you miserable Mutant! Vultureman: Enough of your prattling, bone-head! Mumm-Ra: You've gone too far, Vultureman! [chanting] Ancients spirits of evil, transform this decayed form to Mumm-Ra, the Ever-Living! [Vultureman blasts Mumm-Ra with his laser eyes] Mumm-Ra: Wait, wait, Vultureman, let's talk! Vultureman: I hope you see things my way, Mumm-Ra! Mumm-Ra: I'm most impressed, Vultureman! I had no idea that you were so... talented. Vultureman: I'm not hear to listen to your flattery, Mumm-Ra! I'm here to offer you a deal! Mumm-Ra: A deal? Vultureman: I will smash the Thundercats! I will crush the other Mutants! Mumm-Ra: What do you want for me? Vultureman: The secret of ever-lasting life. Mumm-Ra: And if I share that secret? Vultureman: We rule Third Earth together, forever! [both Mumm-Ra and Vultureman laugh] [in Castle Plun-Darr] Vultureman: Ah, look at you! You call yourselves Mutants? No wonder the Thundercats control Third Earth! Slithe: Just who do you think you're talking to? Vultureman: You, for a start, Slithe! Our glorious leader! Slithe: You'll regret that, Vultureman! [after beating the Mutants] Vultureman: From now on, Mutants, things are going to be different around here. That means you do what I say! You got that? Slithe (slowly): Yes, Vultureman. I agree with you. Vultureman: You got that, Monkian? Jackalman? Jackalman (nervously): Yes, Vultureman! Sir! Monkian: You're the leader... for the time being...

Vultureman: Soon, Mumm-Ra will share with me the secret of ever-lasting life! I, Vultureman, will rule Third Earth! Vultureman: Your technology is useless. Your friend will remain frozen until I release him Panthro: Well, set him free, bird-brain! Vultureman: Oh no! This is just the beginning! Soon all you Thundercats will be in my power! Panthro: Not if I have anything to do with it! Jackalman: We have to get out of here! Monkian: How can we, with that...that... zombie watching us all the time? [Slithe blinks] Jackalman: Wait, look, Monkian! The trance is wearing off! Slithe: What? What happened? Jackalman: It was Vultureman, Slithe! He took over your mind, turned you into some kind of automaton. Slithe: If we don't find the secret of his superpowers, we're all doomed! Search every inch of the castle! [after finding the potion] Slithe: Now I'll be able to fight that miserable buzzard on equal terms! [Mumm-Ra swoops in and snatches the potion] Mumm-Ra: I'll take that, Slithe! Lion-O: Panthro! Come in, Panthro! Oh, come on... It's no use, Snarf. He's not answering! Snarf: First Tygra, now Panthro! This is getting serious, Lion-O! [Vultureman appears] Both: Vultureman! Vultureman: Ahh, Super-Vultureman, Thundercats! I've dealt with your feline friends, Panthro and Tygra! Now it's your turn! Snarf: Oh yeah? You and whose army, beaky? Vultureman: You fight well, Lion-O! But you have no defense against my Superpower Potion! Lion-O: No potion can make you less evil, Vultureman, and evil always loses out in the end. Vultureman: We'll see who loses out, Thundercat! Vultureman: Might is right, Thundercat, and you might as well give in now! Lion-O: Never! No Thundercat will ever give in to evil, whatever the odds! [Mumm-Ra appears during Vultureman's fight with the Thundercats] Mumm-Ra: Looking for this, Vultureman? Vultureman: Ah, quickly, Mumm-Ra! Give me the potion! Mumm-Ra: Not so fast, my feathered friend. We have some bargaining to do! Vultureman: But we had an agreement! Mumm-Ra: I'm changing the terms, Mutant! [Lion-O points the Sword at the Potion] Lion-O: Ho! [The Potion is shattered by the Sword] Vultureman: Ah! You fool! You've ruined everything! I'll never be able to duplicate that potion again! [Mumm-Ra vanishes] Lion-O: You should have known better than to strike a bargain with Mumm-Ra, Vultureman. Vultureman: This is not the end. One day, I'll be back, and all will bend before the might of Vultureman! Lion-O: Phew! That was close! Panthro: It's a good thing Mutants don't stick together as close as Thundercats!

Lion-O, Panthro, Tygra: Thundercats, ho! Lion-O: Well, I think that's the last we'll see of Vultureman for a while. Tygra: And let's hope that's the end of his ambitions to rule Third Earth. Can you imagine what that would be like? Panthro: I'd say that idea is strictly... for the birds! "Eye of the Beholder" [Jackalman corners Snarf] Snarf: Help, Lion-O! Help! [Jackalman spots the Sword of Omens on the ground] Jackalman: While the cat's away... Panthro: Not so fast, Mutant! Jackalman: If I can't have the Sword, at least you won't either! [hurls the Sword of Omens into the river] Lion-O: You okay, Snarf? Snarf: Jackalman thought he could catch old Snarf, but I was too smart for him! Lion-O: You could have drowned! Snarf: Maybe I should carry the Sword; then noone'll dare to bother me! Lion-O: Come on, we'd better get you back to the Lair before you catch pneumonia! Panthro: When we get back, I'll make you a Sword of your own... then you can fight the Mutants whenever you want! Lion-O: Tell me, Panthro; can you actually duplicate this? Panthro: Sure, why not? Everything except for the Eye of Thundera! Why? [Panthro is swinging the fake Sword of Omens] Panthro: Hi-yah! Tygra: Hey, Panthro, be careful with that thing! Panthro: [swings the Sword at Tygra] Hi-yah! [Panthro, Snarf, and Lion-O laugh] Tygra: Have you all gone crazy? Panthro: Your sword, Sir Snarf! Tygra (angrily): What's going on? Lion-O: It's not the real Sword of Omens, Tygra. Show him, Snarf. Panthro: I forged an exact duplicate, except for the Eye of Thundera, of course. Tygra: Hmm, why? Lion-O: Think about it. The Mutants and Mumm-Ra will stop at nothing to get their hands on the Sword of Omens. Panthro: Well, now, we'll let them. Snarf: Only it won't be the real Sword! Lion-O: All we have to do is drop them the word that the Sword of Omens is in the lair, and the Lair's unguarded... [they all laugh] [two Trollogs are spying on the Thunder-kittens] Wily-Kat (whispering): It's a Trollog. Wily-Kit (whispering): Okay, Wily-Kat. Here goes. (louder Can you fix it? I don't want to be late for the Berbil Harvest Festival party? Wily-Kat: Neither do I. Lion-O and the others are probably already there. Wily-Kit: I'm surprised they left the Lair unguarded. Wily-Kat: Snarf's there. Wily-Kit: Yeah, but he's got a terrible cold. Besides, what if someone wanted to steal the Sword

of Omens? What could Snarf do to stop them? Wily-Kat: There! That's fixing it. Come on, let's go to the party! [they fly off] Trollog 1: The Thundercats have left the Sword of Omens in the lair, unguarded. Trollog 2: Those miserable Mutants would pay well for that information! Monkian: The Sword of Omens is unguarded, at the Thundercats' Lair! Jackalman: Unguarded? Impossible! Monkian: Well, the Snarf is there, but he doesn't matter. Jackalman: Let's find Slithe and get going! Monkian: Slithe? Why do we need that reptile? Once I-- uh, we've got the Sword of Omens, we'll put Slithe back in the kitchen where he belongs! [in the sword chamber] Jackalman: Monkian, look! There it is! Monkian: The Sword of Omens! Soon, the power of the Eye of Thundera will be mine--uh, ours. Jackalman: I don't know. It seems too simple. Monkian: You're not frightened, are you? Come on! Lion-O: We shouldn't have left Snarf alone in the Lair. Panthro: Why? All he has to lay low until the Mutants have the fake Sword and then-[The Eye of Thundera flashes] Lion-O: Uh-oh. Sword of Omens, give me sight beyond sight! [sees a vision of Snarf and the Mutants] It's Snarf! The Mutants have got him! Our joke has backfired! Panthro: Well, let's go get him! Jackalman: Now, it's my turn to carry the Sword, Monkian. You take Snarf! Monkian: Not on your life! I know you, you'll run off with it! Jackalman: But we're supposed to be friends! Allies! Monkian: I have the Sword, and I have the power to keep it! Slithe (voiceover): Not yet you don't! [Slithe appears] Slithe: If you please! Monkian: No, Slithe! We found it, we'll keep it. Jackalman: Quite right. Why should we always listen to y-Slithe: Shut up, Jackalman! [to Monkian] Now, give me the Sword! [Monkian gives Slithe the Sword] Lion-O: I swear by the Eye of Thundera, I'll tear Plun-Darr apart with my bare hands if they've harmed one hair on Snarf's head. Panthro: We'll be there in less than thirty minutes, Lion-O. Take it easy. [at the Black Pyramid] Slithe: MUMM-RAAAA! Mumm-Ra: I hope there is some good reason for disturbing my rest, Slithe. Slithe: Yes. We have business to discuss, mighty Mumm-Ra. Mumm-Ra: You seem pleased with yourself. Slithe: You should be more respectful, Mumm-Ra! Mumm-Ra: I? Respectful of you? [laughs] Why? Slithe: Because I... have the Sword... of Omens! Mumm-Ra: The Eye of Thundera! Slithe: Hold it right there, Mumm-Ra! The Sword is mine! Mumm-Ra: Yours? You dare to claim it as yours? Slithe: I'll let you use it, if you share the secret of the Pyramid's power with me. Mumm-Ra: Mumm-Ra shares with no one! Give me the Sword of Omens! [chanting] Ancient spirits of evil, transform this decayed form to Mumm-Ra, the Ever-Living!

[inside Castle Plun-Darr] Jackalman: Hurry! Hurry! They're going to smash the door down any second! Vultureman: Ah! And when they do, they'll get a nasty surprise! [Lion-O destroys Vultureman's cannon with the Sword of Omens] Monkian: The Eye of Thundera! Jackalman: But it can't be! Mumm-Ra (chanting): Ancient spirits of evil, grant your malevolent servant one despicable wish: give me the power of the Eye of Thundera, and I shall remain your most evil slave! Panthro: Call the other Thundercats, Lion-O. Lion-O: No. This was my idea; I have to do it alone. Panthro: They say discretion is the better part of valor, Lion-O. Call them. Lion-O: You're right. Thunder! Thunder! Thundercats... ho! Mumm-Ra: Prepare to meet your end, Lord of the Thundercats! [Lion-O runs in] Lion-O: Snarf! Thank Jaga you're safe! Mumm-Ra: But you are doomed! [points the fake Sword at Lion-O] Lion-O: Ho! [blasts Mumm-Ra with the real Sword] Mumm-Ra: The Sword of Omens? But-Lion-O: Ha! A fake, Mumm-Ra! Mumm-Ra: No! Lion-O: Try it if you don't believe me. Try to summon the power of the Eye of Thundera. Mumm-Ra: I, Mumm-Ra, Ever-Living Source of Evil, command the Eye of Thundera to open! [the fake Sword's Eye flashes] Mumm-Ra: Ha! It obeys me! Your time is up, Lion-O! [the fake Eye turns into a mirror, reflecting Mumm-Ra's face] Lion-O: Yes, Mumm-Ra, a fake, with a mirror for the Eye of Thundera. A mirror to reflect your hideous image; the one force you cannot withstand! Mumm-Ra: One day, Lion-O, I shall find your weakness, and then you will regret the day you crossed Mumm-Ra... Vultureman's powers - Flight, super-strength, X-ray and laser vision, pyrokinesis "Fond Memories" opening monologue Safari Joe: Safari Joe does it again! Lion-O: Not this time, Safari Joe! Safari Joe: Ah, wait! I'm the hunter; you're the prey, remember? [emerging from his icon] Ratar-O: We meet again, Thunder-brat! Dr. Dometome (mockingly): Well done, Lion-O! [transforms to Mumm-Ra] Lion-O: Mumm-Ra! I should have known all along. Mumm-Ra: Did you really think that the miserable creatures of this planet would go to the trouble of building a museum, just for you? Lion-O: Well, I thought that-Mumm-Ra: That conceit will be your destruction, for now you must fight me! Lion-O: I've fought you before, Mumm-Ra, and won! I'll win again!

Mumm-Ra: Not after you get a taste of warp gas! [after dosing Lion-O with warp gas] Mumm-Ra: Now, fight! I challenge you! Lion-O: I-I c-can't fight. I'm t-too scared! Mumm-Ra: So, this is the mighty Lion-O? Lion-O (pleading): D-don't hurt me! Please! Mumm-Ra: One whiff of warp gas, and the Lord of the Thundercats is reduced to a sniveling coward! [after finding the cave] Panthro: A rogues' gallery! Tygra: Mumm-Ra's gallery, if I know anything about it! [as Spidera emerges from her painting] Cheetara: The painting is alive! Panthro: If those paintings are alive... Tygra: ...the odds are, Lion-O's trapped in one of them. Cheetara: There's only one way to find out! Snarf: You don't mean... Wily-Kit: We're going to have to break into them! Panthro: Tygra! Snarf! You come with me and Cheetara. We'll take the Thunder-Tank into Spidera's Kingdom of Webs. Snarf: I don't like this! Tygra: Wily-Kat, Kit, you take Safari Joe! [the Tank heads into Spidera's painting] Wily-Kit: Well, here goes! [flies off] Wily-Kat: Wait for me! [after catching the Thunder-Kittens] Safari Joe: Safari Joe does it again! [a statue of Lion-O with a plaque appears] Lion-O (reading the plaque): 'Lion-O; one-time Lord of the Thundercats'. One-time? We'll see about that! Mumm-Ra: You like my art collection? Lion-O: Free my friends from those collections, Mumm-Ra! Mumm-Ra: Oh no! [changes into a red-version of Lion-O] [while Lion-O falls] Mumm-Ra: Have a pleasant trip, Lion-O! [Lion-O has been pinned by Mumm-Ra in Lion-O's form] Lion-O: It has my strength, my cunning... it is my equal in every way! [Jaga appears] Jaga: Yes, Lion-O. It is just like you. An evil twin, your mirror image. Think! Lion-O: Yes! And what do you see in the mirror? Your own reflection, Mumm-Ra! [holds up the Sword; Mumm-Ra recoils] Back to your pyramid, mummy! [Mumm-Ra flees] "Secret of the Ice King" Snowman: Snowmeow, my last command... fetch... help! Fetch... the Thundercats... Lion-O: Sword of Omens, give me heat!

Panthro: It looks like a snow field's ahead. Tygra: But that's impossible at this time of year! Cheetara: You don't need my intuition to know something's wrong. Tygra: The Plain of Fertility. Buried. Panthro: The Mole Men pits. The Trollogs' and Giantors' caves. Buried. Tygra: It's hard to believe it.This ice cap's covering almost everything within miles. But what's caused it? "Thundercats Ho! - Part One" [on Thundera] Jaga: Lion-O! Where are you? Lion-O! Lion-O: I'm--I'm here, Jaga, over here! Jaga: Come, Lion-O! We must get away while we still can! Lion-O: Get away? But... my home, Jaga... Jaga: We must seek a new home, Lion-O. Be brave, my young lord -- Thundera is no more. Pumyra: Lynx-O, are you alright? Lynx-O: I think--I've been blinded, Pumyra. You and Bengali, run for the ship. Leave me! Bengali: No! We will not abandon you, old friend. Get his other side, Pumyra! Lion-O: Look, Jaga! Survivors! We must wait for them! Jaga: Can't we wait for them, Panthro? Panthro: Not if we're to save... uh, we've only moments left! Jaga: I understand, Panthro. Then... take off. [the ship takes off] Pumyra: Hey! They're leaving! Bengali: They have no choice, Pumyra. A second more, and they would have been destroyed by the quake. [on the ship] Lion-O: But we abandoned them! They were our countrymen! Jaga: One day, as Lord of the Thundercats, you will have to make many hard decisions, Lion-O. This is but the first of them! Lion-O: No! I can't watch! No! [present-day] Lion-O: No! I can't watch! No! Snarf: Lion-O, wake up! Lion-O! Lion-O: What? Oh, Snarf, it was that nightmare again. Snarf: Thundera? Lion-O: Yes. Snarf: I'll get your breakfast, Lion-O. It'll make you feel better! Lion-O: How many times must I watch my fellow Thunderians perish, while I sped to safety? [Jaga appears] Jaga: They didn't perish, Lion-O. Lion-O: Jaga? What are you saying? I saw the flames consume them! Jaga: It seemed that way. But they survived, and they are here on Third Earth. Lion-O: They are? Where? How? Jaga: Cheetara may be able to tell you that, if she uses her gift. Lion-O: Cheetara's gift? Oh, yes, her trance-visions. But-Jaga: Cheetara, Lion-O. Cheetara must tell you... Cheetara: I am beginning to see... Thundera! Yes, I see our countrymen as our shift lifts up! Oh, they have perished! No! They managed to survive! I... can... hear them clearly now!

[flashback] Lynx-O: Is the ship gone? Pumyra: Yes. Bengali: It was the royal flagship of the Thundercats. Lynx-O: Ah, then all is not lost! The Code of Thundera still lives! Pumyra: Justice, truth, honor, loyalty! Bengali: Yes, and the Thundercats will carry that code to all they encounter! [aboard the Robear Berbils' ship] Robear Bert: Robear Bert, look! Robear Bob: I know this, Robear Bot. It's Thundera! Robear Bert: Are there survivors? Robear Bob: We must save them! Bengali: An alien spaceship! Lynx-O: I hear it! Bengali: This way, Lynx-O! Lynx-O: Thank you. You are our friends indeed. Pumyra: And who are you? Robear Bob: We are Berbils, from the planet Robear! Robear Bert: It's a very tiny planet, and so we must go to other planets to survive. [the planet explodes] Lynx-O: What was that? Robear Bob: Your planet. It has been destroyed. Bengali: Be grateful you were spared the sight of that, Lynx-O! Lynx-O: The end of Thundera... Robear Bob: Robear Bert, look. The blast damaged one of the fuel tanks. Robear Bert: Is there enough fuel left to reach Third Earth [flashback ends] Cheetara: They did have enough fuel to reach Third Earth, but... Lion-O: But? But what, Cheetara? Cheetara: ...but not enough to make it to the Berbil village. They landed in the middle of the ocean, on a small deserted island. Lion-O: Where? Which ocean? Cheetara: I...I... I see no more. [in the Black Pyramid] Mumm-Ra: So, there are other Thunderians on Third Earth, and Mumm-Ra will find them, before the Thundercats do... and destroy them! [summons a demonic hound] I need you for this, MaMutt. Yes... I love you too, Ma-Mutt, my ravening beauty. Here is what you must do... [Ma-Mutt's eyes glow as it flies into the air] [Ma-Mutt summons Mumm-Ra onto Hammerhand's ship] Hammerhand: Mumm-Ra! Mumm-Ra: You are quite right to be frightened of Ma-Mutt. Hammerhand: Why are you here, Mumm-Ra? Mumm-Ra: I require your services. There some aliens on an island nearby, that Ma-Mutt has located. Cat-like creatures. You will deliver them to me. Hammerhand: And what do I get in return? Mumm-Ra: My... good will? Hammerhand: We hate good will! Aye, me buckos? [the other pirates clamor] Mumm-Ra: We work for gold, Mumm-Ra! Gold! [the other pirates clamor] Hammerhand: Very well. You will receive gold! Hammerhand: Top-Spinner, do your stuff! [Top-Spinner spins around, knocking Pumyra's rocks back at her]

Hammerhand: Crusher, get ready! [Crusher punches the rocks that the Thunderians throw at them] Lion-O: The Thunder-Claw looks good, Panthro. When will it be finished? Panthro: Closing in, Lion-O. The Hover-Cat is almost ready too! [the Thunder-Kittens arrived] Wily-Kat: Lion-O, Berserkers! Wily-Kit: We saw Hammerhand's ship in Plun-Darr Cove! And it looks like Thunderians are on board. Wily-Kat: And they were in chains. Prisoners! Panthro: What? Let's go get 'em! Lion-O: Wait. First, get this new vehicles operational. We'll need them. Wily-Kit: We'll give you a hand, Panthro. Lion-O: I'll meet you at the ship. Panthro: Right! Let's get at it, kids! Bengali: You! How about some water? Crusher: Sure, matey, maybe after we finishes our delicious dinner! Come on, mates! [leaves] [Hammerhand discovers Lion-O aboard his ship] Hammerhand: Arr, I thought I heard something! Lion-O: You'll wish you hadn't, Hammerhand! Hammerhand: So! It's the young lord himself! Arr, get him! Hammerhand: It's Hammerhand himself ye'll have to deal with, Thundercat! Lion-O: And it'll be a dirty deal if I know you, Hammerhand! Hammerhand: Rambam! The water may be a little cold for the Thundercat. Warm it up for him! [Rambam begins launching fireballs at the water where Lion-O is swimming away] "Thundercats Ho! - Part Two" Snarf: Lion-O's in a boiling sea, and I can't do anything to save him! Hammerhand: And that's the end of the Lord of the Thundercats! [they get blasted] Top-Spinner: We're being attacked! Rambam: What is it? What is it? Crusher: Don't know, don't know. But it looks like another Thundercat at the control! Lynx-O: Another Thundercat, Pumyra? Pumyra: Yes, Lynx-O. Bengali: We've seen him before, on Thundera. It's the mighty Panthro! Panthro: So, Hammerhand and his crew have a lot to answer for. Lion-O: They... have our fellow Thunderians, Panthro. Panthro: Somehow, I see Mumm-Ra's foul, decaying hand in this! Slithe: Ah, Berserkers! Monkian: Oh, I hate dealing with that bunch. Jackalman: They're disgusting! [on the Berserkers' ship] Crusher: Ugh, Mutants. Top-Spinner: I hate doing business with that crew! Rambam: They're revolting, revolting!

[on shore] Hammerhand: Here are the prisoners, Slithe. You have the gold Mumm-Ra promised us, of course? Slithe: Gold? Mumm-Ra promised you gold? Hammerhand: I could easily lose control, and go berserk, if you try to trick me, reptile! [after surrounding Lynx-O] Rambam: You'll have to move faster than that, blind one! Crusher: I've got him, Rambam! Rambam: You've got him? I've got him, Rambam! Crusher: You had him, Rambam? [they charge at Lynx-O; he jumps out of the way and they smash into each other] Lynx-O; Now you have each other, gentlemen. Slithe: We have brought your prisoners as ordered, o mighty Mumm-Ra. Mumm-Ra: So, it seems there were more Thundercats on Third Earth than we thought. Bengali: We are not Thundercats! Lynx-O: We are from Thundera, yes, but we do not have the honor of being Thundercats. Jackalman: Hmph, 'honor'. Slithe: Shh! Mumm-Ra: So, you are merely Thunderian commoners. Even so, I don't think the noble Thundercats would suffer the thought of your being in Mumm-Ra's clutches. Jackalman: Will you keep these Thunderians here, Mumm-Ra? Mumm-Ra: No. They will be taken to Fire Rock Mountain. Pumyra: Whatever your plan, it will fail, Mumm-Ra! Mumm-Ra: Oh, yes, your precious Thundercats will come to rescue you! But... they will have to cross the Fire Rocks to accomplish their mission. These Fire Rocks are known to Thundercats as... Thundrainium! Lynx-O: Ah! Mumm-Ra: The effect of Thundrainium on the Thundercats is known to you? Then you know it will make them as week as Thunder-Kittens! [the Mutants laugh] [aboard the Ratstar] Vultureman: What's that down there, Ratar-O? Ratar-O: It's only that ridiculous creature of the Thundercats! Vultureman: He's in an awful hurry to get somewhere! Ratar-O: Let's give him a lift, Vultureman! [uses a tractor beam to grab Snarf] Ratar-O: So, my prisoner again, eh? Welcome back, hairball! Snarf: I hated this rat's nest last time, Ratar-O! I like it even less this time! [spotting Lion-O on the viewscreen] Vultureman: Ah! It's the King of Beasts, with his little sword! Snarf: Lion-O? Ratar-O: Sword, eh? Let's try a little magnetic attraction! [in the Black Pyramid] Shiner: What is this chore you have for us, Mumm-Ra? Mumm-Ra: These prisoners are to be transported to Fire Rock Mountain? Shiner: Fire Rock Mountain? Ooh, treacherous updrafts in those canyons, Mumm-Ra. It, uh, will be expensive... Mumm-Ra: You are always expensive, Captain Shiner! Shiner: What can I tell you? I'm a mercenary!

[aboard Shiner's ship] Lynx-O: I will revive the pilot if you tell him to turn the ship around, Shiner. Shiner: Yes, yes, yes, certainly, right away! [Lynx-O revives the pilot] Shiner: Turn 180 degrees south. Pilot: Uh... aye, aye, Captain. Bengali: You're still heading for those horrible peaks! Turn now! [Shiner shuts off the tele-screen] Pumyra: What happened to the tele-screen? Shiner: Electrical failure! Bengali: Turn, or-Shiner: We're turning now! Relax! Lynx-O: Bengali, the ship is not turning. It's descending! Bengali: What are you up to, Shiner? Shiner: Nothing, my friend! I assure you, we're almost around! Pilot: 180 complete, heading south! [the ship's hatches open; Thundrainium fumes begin flooding in] Bengali: Those fumes! We must be near Fire Rock Mountain... below... Lynx-O: Thundrainium fumes... weak... [the Thunderians pass out] Shiner: Yes, my brave Thunderians... Panthro: It's my fault! I shouldn't have let Lion-O tackle Ratar-O alone! Now Snarf and Lion-O are missing, prisoners themselves! Cheetara: We don't know that, Panthro. Panthro: Then where is he? Tygra: He may on the trail of the Thunderians. Panthro: Alone? Cheetara: Well, you know how impetuous Lion-O is. Panthro: Impetuous, yes. Stupid, no! He'd never tackle that whole mob without us! Wily-Kat: Oh, Panthro's right! Tygra: Yes, Lion-O certainly learned the value of teamwork! Cheetara: But where could we look for him? Even in Panthro's new vehicles, we can't cover all of Third Earth. Wily-Kit: We can try! Panthro: Right. We sure won't find them sitting around in Cats' Lair! Tygra: But not you two! Sorry, someone has to hold the fort. Wily-Kat: What? Wily-Kit: Teamwork, remember! [after finding Lion-O beneath the snow] Snowman: Lord Lion-O! But is wrong color! Not supposed to blue! Lion-O mustn't give up! You hear me? Lion-O (waking): Snowman? Snowman: Yes, it is your wonderful friend, Snowman! Here, drink this! Mountain herb medicine! Lion-O: Ugh! That's awful! Snowman: Yes. But worse it tastes, better it is for you! [seeing Monkian in the Fistpounder] Lion-O: What is that thing? Monkian: You'll never make it, Thundercat! "Thundercats, Ho! - Part Three" Snowman: You are summoning your comrades, Lord Lion-O? But the Mutants have scattered! Lion-O: Only for a moment, Snowman. They'll be back.

[they get blasted] Lion-O: And there they are! Sky-Cutter! And there; it's Jackalman, in the Nose Diver. Slithe: Run, Lion-O, run... but there's no place to hide! Cheetara: Tygra, below us; a Nose Diver! Tygra: And, aha, look at who's after it? Snowman and Snowmeow will get mad if we try to help! But where's Lion-O? Cheetara: Tygra, dead ahead. A Sky-Cutter! Tygra: Slithe. I can handle him alone, Cheetara. You scout around, look for Lion-O. [Tygra begins shooting at the Sky-Cutter] Lion-O: The Hover-Cat, with Tygra at the controls! He thinks I'm Slithe, and I can't fire back! Tygra: He's taking evasive action. Why isn't Slithe counterattacking? Lion-O: Tygra's too good at this! I'm a goner if I don't do something. [spots the Sword] The Sword! On that ravine! Tygra: Got him dead in my sights... [Lion-O raises the Sword] Lion-O: Thunder! Thunder! Thundercats... ho! Tygra: The Cat Signal! Lion-O! Tygra: Lion-O, that was close! Lion-O: 'Close' doesn't count, lucky for me! Tygra: What next, Lion-O? Lion-O: To locate our fellow Thunderians, and if I guess right Mumm-Ra knows where they are. Cheetara: Hmm, we'll have to muster all our Thundercat strength. Lion-O: Yes. That'll be your job. Tygra: Our job? Where will you be, Lion-O? Lion-O: Confronting Mumm-Ra face to face, in his Pyramid. Cheetara: That's impossible, Lion-O! Lion-O: No, Cheetara; I've found my way into the Pyramid before. At the very least, I may find out what Mumm-Ra plans for the Thunderians. Hurry; our countrymen's lives are at stake! [Lion-O flies off in the Sky-Cutter] [after spotting Panthro] Monkian: The Thunder-Tank! Ooh, the Fist-Pounder has been waiting for this! Panthro: This thing could be trouble! [aboard the Rat-Star] Ratar-O: Vultureman, look! There's a battle raging below between the Thunder-Tank and one of the Mutant war wagons! Vultureman: It's the Fist-Pounder! The Thundercat doesn't have a chance! Ratar-O: Heh, looks like a standoff to me! Shiner: So, finally, the mighty Mutant warriors... and a pretty pair you make, I must say, eh, men? [the men laugh; Slithe attacks Shiner, who dodges] Shiner: Now, now, Slithe; we're comrades-in-arms... for the moment, anyway. Taking MummRa's prisoners to their cells is the first order of business. The Thundrainium has made them as weak as newborn cubs. Even you should be able to handle them... [Shiner and his men beam back onto their ship] Slithe (to Lynx-O): Up! I'm losing patience with you! Bengali: Stop that! Pumyra: Lynx-O cannot see! Slithe: All the better; makes him easier to handle, yes? Pumyra: Handle this, Reptilian!

[Pumyra kicks Slithe into Jackalman] Bengali: Run! There must be a way out of this place! Slithe: Get those two, Jackalman! I'll get the one they call 'Lynx-O'! [after being caught] Bengali: Ugh, looks like we've had it! Pumyra: Yes. No way out that I can see! Lynx-O: There is always a way. Bengali: You have a plan, Lynx-O? Pumyra: What is it? Lynx-O: We must wait for the proper time. [inside a hall of mummies in the Black Pyramid] Lion-O: Who would these guys be? Mumm-Ra's ancestors? Mumm-Ra: No, Lion-O... they are my prisoners for eternity, as you will soon be! [while being wrapped in mummy bandages] Lion-O: Too... strong! I'm... being mummified! "Thundercats Ho! -- Part Four" [after being freed from the bandages] Lion-O: These... ugh, mummy wrappings had me! What happened? [looks up] The Sun... maybe that's it! In the evil gloom of Mumm-Ra's Pyramid, these horrid rags were invincible. But exposed to the light, they crumbled to dust. [pause] That was useless; I'll have to assault Fire Rock Mountain directly, if we even hope to rescue our Thunderian country men! Snowman: We will get you out somehow! Panthro: It's no use. Leave me; I'm just one Thundercat. There are three Thunderian prisoners who need you. Tygra: They need you too, old friend! Snowman: Mustn't give up! [after freeing Panthro] Cheetara: Any injuries, Panthro? Panthro: Don't seem to be. Tygra: Did you take a direct hit? Panthro: Probably not. Looks like the shockwave from Ratar-O's cannon did the cannon. [the Thunder-Tank stalls] I owe you one, Ratar-O! [the Thunder-Tank starts up] Panthro: Aha! That's my baby! Let's go! Cheetara: No, Panthro, you need rest! Tygra: Cheetara's right. She and I will go on ahead. You take a few minutes and-Panthro: --our Thunderian countrymen may not have but a few minutes! Tygra: ...you heard the man! Slithe: Are you in position, Monkian? Monkian: Getting there, Slithe! Getting there! Slithe: 'Getting there'! You've had all day to get there! Monkian: All right, all right, I'm there! It's the only land approach to Fire Rock Mountain. When the Thunder-Tank comes around the bend, the Fist-Pounder will be waiting! [aboard the Ratstar] Vultureman: Interference on the tele-screen, Ratar-O! [Mumm-Ra appears on screen] Ratar-O: It's Mumm-Ra! What now?

Mumm-Ra: I want you on Fire Rock Mountain to reinforce the Mutants. Ratar-O: Not necessary, Mumm-Ra. I've destroyed the Thunder-Tank and-Mumm-Ra: Don't argue! I'm taking no chances, Ratar-O. I want the Thundercats wiped out! Ratar-O: Oh, very well, Mumm-Ra. Set the course, Vultureman. Take the direct route. Vultureman: But the direct route takes us over Tuska country! Ratar-O: So? Vultureman: 'So'? The Tuskans are Thundercat allies! Ratar-O: Who cares? Take the direct route, like I said! Vultureman: Nice clean shot, Ratar-O! Ratar-O: One more blast from the Varicannon, and the Tuskas are just a stain on the beach! Ratar-O: The magnificent Ratar-O, running from Tuskas? [Ratar-O retreats] Turmagar: My goodness! It's friend Snarf! Oh my, you poor fellow! Hold very still now! [frees Snarf] Hmm, yes, I'm afraid this won't be pleasant! [rips off the tape on his mouth] Oh, I'm so sorry, little friend! Come, you must tell us what happened... Hammerhand: Aye, me hearties, here's your share, Rambam! And yours, Top-Spinner! Crusher! Rambam: Hey, your share's bigger than mine, Top-Spinner! [they begin fighting] Crusher: While you two have been yelling at each other, you haven't noticed Hammerhand's pile! Top-Spinner: Hey, what's the idea, Hammerhand? Rambam: That ain't fair! Top-Spinner: Fair! Crusher: Fair! Hammerhand: If it's a bigger share you want, there's plenty more where that came from. Others: Where? How? Hammerhand: Mumm-Ra paid us this gold for delivering those catlike critters, right? Others: Right? So? Hammerhand: So, all we have to do is recapture them and... er... sell 'em to Mumm-Ra again! The Mutants were taking them to Fire Rock Mountain, weren't they? And there's a sea approach to Fire Rock Mountain, isn't there? Others: Yeah, sure! [on the ledge] Snarf: Ohh, the Thundercats have enough to deal with without the Berserkers! We have to think of something, Turmagar! Turmagar: Hmm, maybe I help! [after freeing the Robear Berbils] Robear Bob: Who are you? Snarf: Does the name 'Snarf, of the Thundercats' mean anything to you? [the Robears shake their head] Snarf: Never mind! Grab one of those jet life boats, make for shore, then hide! [after escaping] Bengali: Odd... I feel like I'm... losing strength... Lynx-O: We must be getting closer to the Thundrainium pits. Pumyra: You mean, we have to cross the Thunderian pits to get out of here? Lynx-O: Unfortunately, yes. Pumyra: Come on, Thunderians, let's not give up! Mumm-Ra: All goes well: the Thundercats are heading towards Fire Rock Mountain to meet their doom in the Thundrainium pits. My plan is perfect... except the Eye of Thundera must be put out of commission! And there is only one swordsman who has ever been a match for Lion-O.

(chanting) Hachiman! Appear! Hachiman! Hachiman: You, Mumm-ra-san! Why do you bring me to this bad place again? You know I will not serve you! Mumm-Ra: Lion-O of the Thundercats has done you great dishonor! Hachiman: No! This is not possible! Mumm-Ra: I shudder to show this, Hachiman, but... [in the pool, the image of an old samurai appears] Mumm-Ra; Your samurai ancestor, your great-uncle Nishida! Hachiman: But he seems to be in pain! Why? Mumm-Ra: Because Lion-O holds his spirit in bondage! He hopes to gather added samurai strength and skill for himself, to terrorize Third Earth! Hachiman: I cannot believe this! Lion-O-san is a man of honor! Mumm-Ra: Perhaps he once was, but lust for power has twisted his mind! Hachiman: Yes... this has happened to good men before... Mumm-Ra: You must destroy the Eye of Thundera if you would save him! Nishida: Release me, Hachiman... free my spirit... Hachiman: I obey, honorable great-uncle. The evil of Lord Lion-O shall not go unpunished while Hachiman lives! Where shall I find him? Mumm-Ra: I know where Lion-O will be. You will be waiting for him! [Hachiman walks away] Hachiman: You summon your fellow Thundercats, Lord Lion-O? They will not be here in time to help you. Lion-O: Hachiman! What are you doing here? Hachiman: I have come to put an end to your evil. Lion-O: What are you saying, Hachiman? We're friends! Hachiman: 'Friends'? Would a 'friend' defile the spirit of a friend's ancestor? Lion-O: Your ancestor? I don't-Hachiman: It is useless to pretend, Lord Lion-O! I know this from Mumm-Ra-san! Lion-O: Mumm-Ra! He lies, Hachiman! Hachiman: No! Mumm-Ra showed me what you have done! Defend yourself, Lion-O! Lion-O: No, I... can't fight you! [Hachiman charges, and slips off the side of a ledge] Lion-O: Hachiman! [Hachiman pulls him up] Hachiman: You saved my life, Lion-O-san? I, who must destroy you? Lion-O: No-[Lion-O slips; behind him, Nishida appears] Hachiman: Lion-O-san! The samurai... Nishida: Release me... Hachiman... free me... avenge me... Hachiman... Hachiman: I must obey... "Thundercats Ho! - Part Five" Hachiman: No! Take hold of the bridge, Lion-O-san! Lion-O: I... can't, Hachiman. Slipping... Hachiman: No, I will help you! [Hachiman pulls him up] Hachiman: You, Lord Lion-O, you were so frightened you could not move! I cannot believe this. Lion-O: Down there are Fire Rocks, Hachiman, what we call Thundrainium. It weakens Thundercats, takes our strength. Hachiman: I saw this. And, knowing that, you came out on the bridge to save me? Lion-O: Because you are my friend. Hachiman: Mumm-Ra has lied! My samurai ancestor would never command that I destroy a friend. The code of Bushido forbids it! I have been fooled! Lion-O: You couldn't have known, Hachiman. Mumm-Ra's evil has no limits.

Hachiman: I am shamed, Lion-O-san. Allow me to help you. I ask humbly. [in the Black Pyramid] Mumm-Ra: Hachiman saw through my trick! Even so, the Thundercats haven't a chance! Still... [Captain Shiner's image appears in the cauldron] Captain Shiner! Shiner: Yes, Mumm-Ra? What now? Mumm-Ra: The Thundercats are converging upon Fire Rock Mountain. Seek, and destroy them! Shiner: I tire of this game, Mumm-Ra. The price will be high. Mumm-Ra: Name your price, and it will be yours! [aboard the Vertis] Pilot: Captain Shiner, Thundercat ships! Shiner: Tiny little things... ah well. Attack! Mercenary: And now, you're weaponless! [Tygra disarms the mercenary with his whip] Cheetara: But not friendless! Just in time, Cheetara! Pilot: They're obviously gone! Shiner: Yes, they must be a hundred miles from here by now. We can relax. [Tygra and Cheetara enter] Tygra: Think again, Shiner! [seeing the Gumplin] Rambam: Hammerhand, it's back! It's back! That thing that towed our ship out to sea, it's back! Back! Hammerhand: Aaargh, blast it out of the sky! Now! Now! Monkian: I'm waiting for you, Panthro! [Panthro sees the Fist-Pounder on his radar] Panthro: Looks like I'm expected... Well, no other way to go but straight ahead! [after chasing off Monkian] Panthro: Thundercats, here comes Panthro! Ho! [after sinking the Berserkers] Thunder-Kittens: Thundercats, here we come! Ho! Tygra: All present, Lion-O! [Mumm-Ra appears] Hachiman: Mumm-Ra! Defend yourself, evil one! Mumm-Ra: You have betrayed me! [Mumm-Ra banishes Hachiman] Lion-O: Hachiman! What has Mumm-Ra done to him? [Jaga appears] Jaga: Hachiman is safe, Lion-O. Lion-O: Jaga! Jaga: He is back in his own time, in his own dimension. Lion-O: I'm glad to hear that. But we've failed. There's nothing more we can do. Jaga: There is something, Lion-O: the Star of Thundera. It can render the Thundrainium harmless to you. Lion-O: Then I must have it. How can I get it, Jaga? Jaga: I will try, Lion-O. I will try... Mumm-Ra: The Star of Thundera... the greatest power in the universe. If the Thundercats use it against me, I'm done. No one can stop Jaga except another of his kind... possibly Jaga's ancient

enemy, Grune the Destroyer! [in space] Jaga: The Star of Thundera! [Grune appears] Jaga: Grune! Grune: Yes, Jaga, old friend. Jaga: Stand aside; I have no time for you! Grune: But there's always time to settle old scores, Jaga. You have only to get past me to reach the star! A fight, Jaga. A fair fight. What do you say? [Grune attacks] Lion-O: The Star gave us its power? Jaga: Not 'gave', Lion-O. Power is never a gift, but a responsibility. Lion-O: Yes, Jaga. [Jaga gives Lion-O the Star of Thundera] Jaga: Wear this talisman, and the Thundrainium will not harm you. Go, bring back our countrymen. [Jaga vanishes] Lynx-O: Wait! The way out is that way. Bengali: There? But that's where the Thundrainium is, Lynx-O. Lynx-O: Even so, Bengali. We must go that way if we are to save ourselves! Pumyra: Lynx-O has been right so far! Bengali: Let's hope this gives him a perfect score, Pumyra. [after finding the Thunderians] Lion-O: Quickly, join hands. If you maintain contact with me, the Thundrainium cannot harm you. Mumm-Ra: He has power of the Star of Thundera around his neck! It must not be! Ancient spirits of evil, transform this decayed form to Mumm-Ra, the Ever-Living! [Mumm-Ra flies off after them] Cheetara: Look out! Mumm-Ra! [Mumm-Ra snatches the talisman] Lion-O: He's got the talisman! Mumm-Ra: The Star of Thundera, the greatest power in the universe, is mine! Mine alone! [Jaga appears] Jaga: No, Mumm-Ra! You mustn't open the talisman! Mumm-Ra: You tell me what I must or must not do? Mumm-Ra, who now rules the universe? [Jaga disappears; the talisman begins to glow bright, the volcano explodes] Lion-O: Lynx-O, Pumyra, Bengali, make yourselves at home. Pumyra: Cat's Lair! Bengali: Just as it was on Thundera! Pumyra: We haven't thanked you. Bengali: Especially you. And you haven't even told us your name! Lynx-O: You are standing before Lion-O, Lord of the Thundercats! Lion-O: How did you know, Lynx-O? Lynx-O: I hear your father's voice in yours. I could not mistake it. Lion-O: You knew my father? Lynx-O: Everyone knew him. Lion-O: You must tell me about him! I was just a child when we... we lost Thundera. Lynx-O: I will tell you gladly, when we visit here. Lion-O: 'Visit'? But you'll be living here, all of you. Pumyra: In Cat's Lair?

Bengali: On Thundera, the Lair was only for Thundercats. Lion-O: Well, you handled yourselves like Thundercats, and once I anoint you, you'll be true Thundercats! What say all of you? Tygra: Thundercats, one and all. All: Ho! "Mumm-Ra Lives! - Part One" Lion-O: Here's to Third Earth, and to peace at last! Panthro: Peace, huh? That's going to take some getting used to. I'm not sure I believe things will be that easy. Snarf: I don't know how I'm going to handle being an unemployed warrior! Lynx-O: Keeping the peace can be as difficult as winning it. Cheetara: Hmm, I suppose there's always fire drill and routine maintenance. Tygra: And Mutants, Cheetara. We can count on them to make trouble! Wily-Kit: We can teach our Thundercat technology to all our friends. Wily-Kat: And turn this whole planet into a model of peace and prosperity! Panthro: All right! That's the way to look at it! Snarf: We'll throw a great feast and invite all our friends to meet Pumyra, Bengali, and Lynx-O -the new Thundercats! Bengali: Sounds like we'll have our hands full, even with Mumm-Ra gone! Cheetara (moaning): Mumm-Ra! Bengali: Cheetara! Cheetara: Mumm-Ra! Panthro: Are you okay? Lion-O: What is it, Cheetara? Cheetara: I'm not sure. I guess I just can't believe that Mumm-Ra's finished, once and for all. [later] Lion-O (thinking): I know just how Cheetara feels. Mumm-Ra really gone? I can hardly believe it myself! [Jaga appears] Jaga: Can you be sure he has gone, Lion-O? Lion-O: Jaga! What do you mean? How could Mumm-Ra have possibly survived? The Star of Thundera tore Fire Rock Mountain apart, and destroyed Mumm-Ra along with it. There's no way he could have survived! Jaga: The forces of evil can never be entirely destroyed, Lion-O; only held in check by those with strength and courage. With an evil power as great as Mumm-Ra's, who can say that he is gone forever? [in a crater in Fire Rock Mountain, Ma-Mutt pulls Mumm-Ra out] Mumm-Ra: Ma-Mutt... my faithful Ma-Mutt... I am weak. Take me to my Pyramid... [in his Pyramid] Mumm-Ra: I have survived, Ma-Mutt, because I am Mumm-Ra the Ever-Living! But I am weak, and powerless. So, while I regain my strength, you must take my place! You must become Mumm-Ra! [Mumm-Ra changes Ma-Mutt into a ghostly image of himself] Mumm-Ra: A bit transparent, but you'll have to do. Certainly, you should fool the Mutants. Listen carefully to my instructions, Ma-Mutt... [in Castle Plun-Darr, Ma-Mutt appears disguised as Mumm-Ra] Slithe: Mumm-Ra! Jackalman: It's impossible! Vultureman: You're alive! Ma-Mutt: The fools! Do you think Mumm-Ra, the Ever-Living, could perish? [later]

Ma-Mutt: Not even the Thundercats will be able to resist the Lunataks of Plun-Darr? Snarf (outside): Mumm-Ra? Monkian: 'Lunataks'? They're here? Vultureman: Alive? Ma-Mutt: They're here, but hardly 'alive'! You see, long before you Mutants arrived here, the Lunataks tried to overthrow me! A fatal error of judgment! Jackalman: You destroyed the Lunataks? Ma-Mutt: To destroy them would be too easy a punishment! No, Mutants, I encased them in molten lava! You will now release them! Vultureman: No, Mumm-Ra! We will do anything you command, but we cannot release the Lunataks of Plun-Darr! Monkian: Let them stay encased in molten lava forever! Jackalman: They're too vicious even for my liking! Ma-Mutt: Exactly, Jackalman. This is enough to take care of the Thundercats forever. Slithe: Yes, but the Lunataks cannot be controlled, Mumm-Ra! Ma-Mutt: Nonsense, Slithe! I have already defeated and entombed them once, and I will do it again, after they have crushed the Thundercats! Jackalman: But--but where are the Lunataks now, Mumm-Ra? Ma-Mutt: On Dark Side! Monkian: The Forbidden Territories? Vultureman: Even if we find them, Mumm-Ra, how do we free them? Ma-Mutt: That, Vultureman, is up to you. You are a technician, after all! [changes back into Ma-Mutt and flies away] Snarf: Ma-Mutt! But I heard Mumm-Ra in there! [while shelling the Thundercats from the Sky-Cutter] Jackalman: Kiss Third Earth good-bye, Thundercats! Lion-O: I can't believe Mumm-Ra survived. Panthro: Sounds like we better prepare for some action. Snarf: I don't care about Mumm-Ra, Lion-O. At least we know him. But what about these... 'Lunataks'? What in the name of Thundera are they? Lynx-O: I have heard of some such. Fearsome raiders from the Moons of Plun-Darr. But they were before my time. Tygra: How can we find out about them? Lynx-O: I could find out, if I could touch the places they have been and interpret the information thus gained, on a Braille Board. Panthro: A Braille Board? What is that? Lynx-O: We have the technology. We could build one! Lion-O: If a Braille Board is what it takes to find out about the Lunataks, then that's what we'll build. Panthro and Tygra, you work on that with Lynx-O. The rest of us will check every known corner of Third Earth and see what we can find out. And if we come up blank, at least our new Thundercats will know the territory! All: Thundercats, ho! Jackalman: If that's Dark Side, I don't like the look of it. It's scary! Slithe: More scary than Mumm-Ra, coward? Jackalman: Oh, all right, all right. Let's go! Pumyra: What is Dark Side, Lion-O? Lion-O: Forbidden territories, by local legend. Snarf: Full of weird creatures and monsters and... stuff like that. Lion-O: It's guarded by the Thundrainium pits at Fire Rock Mountain. No Thundercat has ever crossed into Dark Side. Snarf: But I got a nasty feeling that we'll soon be breaking that rule!

Slithe: This better work, Vultureman, or Mumm-Ra will have your beak! Vultureman: Trust me, Slithe! Slithe: I've trusted you before, Feather-Brain! Monkian: Quit arguing, and tell me what to do, Vultureman! Vultureman: It's simple. You fly the Sky-Cutter up to the end of our channel. Then, you blast a hole right down into the heart of the volcano! The molten lava will flow into this channel, surround the Lunataks, melt the lava around them, and free them! Pure genius! Jackalman: But what about me? Vultureman: You've got the most important job of all, Jackalman. When the molten lava fills the channel, surrounding the Lunataks, you and the Fist-Pounder have to cut off the flow of lava before it traps us! Slithe: And if you foul up, Jackalman, you'll end up as a bath mat in Mumm-Ra's pyramid! Jackalman: Oh, wind your neck in, Slithe! Vultureman: Let's go, Mutants! Go, go, go! Cheetara: Lion-O, do you see that? Lion-O: Some kind of volcanic explosion! Sword of Omens, give me sight beyond sight! [sees a vision] The Lunataks! The Mutants have freed the Lunataks! We have to find a way into Dark Side! "Mumm-Ra Lives! - Part Two" Lion-O: Back to Cats' Lair! This is big trouble! Snarf: First Mumm-Ra resurfaces, and now Lunataks! I wish someone would tell me what's going on! Cheetara: There is no one to tell us, Snarf! We're on our own. We have to find out for ourselves. Slithe: Wait, wait, hear us out! Vultureman: You owe it to me, Lunatak! Slithe: Huh? Vultureman: To us! We freed you! Lunatak: We owe you nothing, Mutant! [Ma-Mutt appears in the guise of Mumm-Ra] Ma-Mutt: Stop! Mumm-Ra the Ever-Living, Lord of Third Earth, forbids you to fight each other! We may have had our differences in the past, but all that is forgotten! Forgiven! We should work together now, work to destroy our mutual enemies, the Thundercats! [Lunataks clamor] Ma-Mutt: Only by working together, will we purge Third Earth of their clingering good deeds! Luna: And then, Mumm-Ra? Ma-Mutt: And then, Luna, we will divide Third Earth among ourselves and plunder it at will! What do you say, Lunataks? [Pumyra and Bengali square off with the Brutemen] Panthro: Bengali, Pumyra, wait! Easy fellas, whoa! Be cool, now! [The Brutemen back down] Panthro: These are Brutemen. Bengali: Strong brutes, too! Panthro: But gentle! Pumyra: The poor things are manacled and chained. They're slaves. Panthro: We better find out who their masters are, because whoever they are, they've stolen our Thundrillium! [after Bengali strikes off the Brutemen's chains] Panthro: I'm impressed, Bengali! Bengali: I was a blacksmith on Thundera!

Chilla: I hope your stupid Brutemen can cope with the advance design of SkyTomb, Vultureman! Vultureman: Relax, Chilla! They built Castle Plun-Darr for us, didn't they? Chilla: Ha, some recommendation. Castle Plun-Darr is primitive! Light-years behind SkyTomb. Vultureman: If you Lunataks are so advanced, and we Mutants are so backward, do your own blasted repairs, Chilla! Chilla: Cool out, Vultureman! [Chilla blasts Vultureman's throat with ice] Chilla: You've got a job to finish! Now finish it! [Chilla melts Vultureman's ice with a heat blast; Vultureman flees] Chilla: Mutants never were a match for Lunataks! Cheetara: Lion-O's in trouble over at Fire Rock Mountain! Panthro: So what are we waiting for? Looks like the Thunder-Strike's first test flight will be it's first combat mission! Tugmug: So, this is the legendary Sword of Omens? [breaks the Sword of Omens in half] Lion-O: Who are you? Tugmug: They call me Tugmug, and I am a Lunatak from the moons of Plun-Darr! Ours will be a short acquaintance! Wily-Kit: Don't count on that! Hang tough, Lion-O... Wily-Kat: ...here we come! Slithe: Thundercats, Tugmug! And there'll be more on the way! Tugmug: I have no fear of Thundercats, Slithe! Slithe: Perhaps not, Tugmug, but getting the Thundrillium to SkyTomb is more important than fighting Thundercats, yes? Tugmug: For once, Slithe, you are right! [Tugmug grabs Slithe and leaps away] Tygra: Did you see that? Panthro: If that's a taste of what we're up against, we've got our work cut out! Let's link and land. Panthro: Who... Tygra: ...or what... Panthro: ...was that? Lion-O: That was Tugmug, from one of the moons of Plun-Darr! Lynx-O: Moons of Plun-Darr... certain of those moons have an extraordinarily powerful gravitational pull. Any creature from such a place would have quite exceptional powers here on Third Earth! Luna: We must be prepared to defend ourselves at any moment! Slithe: Ah, the Thundercats cannot enter Dark Side, Luna! They can't pass Fire Rock Mountain. Tugmug: Besides, Thundercats are no match for Lunataks! Why, I snapped that cub's sword like a twig! Luna: Never, never, never underestimate an enemy! We must be prepared! [after SkyTomb is activated] Jackalman: Impressive, huh? You could never have done it without the help of us Mutants! Chilla: Lunataks do not need Mutants, cur! [after reforging the Sword of Omens] Bengali: That should do it! Lion-O: I don't know how you did it! Bengali: A Thunderian blacksmith forged that mighty blade, Lion-O. Only another smith, like me, would know the secrets of its alloys. Lion-O: It's my guess that there are some secrets in that hammer, too!

Lion-O: If we could only find a way to bypass Fire Rock Mountain, we'd stand a chance of finding out what this new evil alliance is all about. Bolkan: But there is a way past Fire Rock Mountain. Lion-O: There is? Bolkan: Sure. I thought everyone knew that. Well, it's a legend, really. They say there's a canyon that leads directly into the Dark Side. Wolo: It starts in the Forest of Mists! Panthro: Ugh, much use that is. No one's found a way of navigating through that stuff! Lynx-O: Then perhaps I could. Since my blindness, I have had to learn many new ways, develop other senses. The Forest of Mists deprives you and our vehicles of sight, of radar. But it deprives me of nothing. I might be able to guide you through it. Panthro: Well, if we're going to do it, let's do it! All: Thundercats, ho! [after failing to find the SkyTomb] Wolo: It was here, Lion-O! You must believe me! Wolos do not lie! Bolkan: Neither do Bolkans! Panthro: Lion-O, over here! The ground is charred. Lion-O: That means... Lynx-O: Yes, Lion-O. SkyTomb is not a fixed fortress. Panthro: The blasted thing's mobile. Lion-O: The Lunataks can move anywhere, terrorize and plunder wherever they want to. There is no safe place on Third Earth. "Mumm-Ra Lives! - Part Three" Lynx-O: The decision is yours, of course, Lion-O. You are the Lord of the Thundercats. But we should return to Cats' Lair to devise an effective strategy which will contain the menace of SkyTomb. Lion-O: You're right, Lynx-O. I value your wisdom. Fire off the Thunder-Strike, Panthro, and let's get out of here! Mumm-Ra: So, my faithful Ma-Mutt, you have done everything I have asked for and more. You are indeed a mummy's best friend! The Lunataks are free and the SkyTomb is operational. The Thundercats' days on Third Earth are numbered! But we must go; the Thundercats' plans, MaMutt -- you must discover them! [chanting] Ancient spirits of evil, transform this decaying dog into Ma-Mutt, the Berbil! The perfect spy... now, my beauty, the Thundercats will never suspect you! Find out how they plan to resist the Lunataks of Plun-Darr, while I rest and regain my terrible powers! Redeye: Well, Lunataks, perhaps we misjudged our friends the Mutants. They seem to make excellent servants! Luna: You're wrong, Redeye. You can never trust a Mutant! Chilla: No Mutant has ever been a match for a Lunatak, Luna. Luna: Mutants may be stupid, Chilla, but they are also capable of great treachery! No -- once the SkyTomb is fully operational, we will dump the Mutants and those miserable slaves. Alluro: We will? Who says so? You? Luna: Yes, Alluro! I, Luna, say so! Tugmug: Who put you in charge? Lunataks are free agents! We owe you nothing! Luna: I put me in charge! I will command, and you will obey! You see, the Mutants are dumb, but you're no better! It was fighting among ourselves that enabled that bag of bones Mumm-Ra to defeat us the first time we visited this miserable planet. This time we'll fight united, under my leadership. And when we've wiped out the Thundercats, we'll teach Mumm-Ra a lesson in revenge! 'Mumm-Ra, the Ever-Living' will become 'Mumm-Ra, the Non-Existent'!

Lion-O: This, Robear Bill, is the Tower of Omens. Cheetara: We'll locate it right at the opening of the canyon that leads to the Forest of Mists. Robear Bill: But no one can pass through there, Cheetara. Panthro: I've got a plan to install fog lamps on all our vehicles that'll cut right through that soup, Robear Bill. Tygra: We have to build the Tower of Omens there. It's the ideal spot to monitor the Lunataks' activities. It'll give us the earliest possible warning of a Lunatak attack! Lion-O: So, Robear Bill, will you help us to build the Tower of Omens? Robear Bill: Yes, Lion-O. We will do it. Helping the Thundercats means helping everyone on Third Earth. Snarf: Snarf to Snarfer, can you hear me, over? Kid's never where he's supposed to be! [Snarfer appears on the viewscreen] Snarfer: Hi, Uncle Snarf! Snarf: It's about time! Now, when are you leaving? Snarfer: We're programming the ship now, Uncle Osbert. Snarf: I told you never to call me 'Uncle Osbert'! Snarfer: Sorry, Uncle Snarf! Snarf: You do understand that the Tower of Omens will be your sole responsibility. I'll be too busy running Cats' Lair to help you. Are you sure you're up to it? Snarfer: Ooh, you betcha, Uncle Snarf. I can do it! Ooh, yeah, no sweat! Snarf: Well, you better get moving. We've already started building the Tower of Omens! Snarfer: No sweat! I'm on my way! No sweat, be right there! [inside the Tower of Omens] Panthro: From this vantage point, Lion-O, Lynx-O will be able to see any attempt to invade Third Earth by way of the canyon or the Forest of Mists. Snarf (whispering): How can he see, Lion-O? Lynx-O's blind! Lion-O: Shh, Snarf! Lynx-O: That's all right, Lion-O. Most people assume that anyone without sight is practically useless. Snarf: Y-you heard me? Lynx-O: Of course, Snarf. I may not see like you do, but I have developed my other senses so that I know as much as you do about what is happening around me. And, now that Panthro and Tygra have built my latest Braille Board, ha ha, I probably know more about what happens around here than you do. Bengali: What news of young Snarfer, Snarf? Shouldn't he be here by now? Lion-O: Yes, Snarf. Where is young Snarfer? Snarf: Oh, relax! He's on his way! (quietly) I hope! Luna: We've been boarded, Amok! Amok: That's not possible, Luna! Chilla: SkyTomb is impregnable. Ma-Mutt (disguised as Mumm-Ra): Impregnable to all, except Mumm-Ra, the Ever-Living! Alluro: Ha! I should have known. Ma-Mutt: You know nothing, Alluro! Nothing, unless Mumm-Ra tells you! Tugmug: What have you to tell us, you broken-down bundle of bandages? Ma-Mutt: Only that the Thundercats have built an outpost on the approach to Dark Side. They call it the Tower of Omens! Luna: It must be destroyed! Battle Stations! [during the Lunatak attack on the Tower of Omens] Lion-O: Let's get out there and see what we can do, partner! Panthro: Just try to stop me!

Jackalman: A ringside seat at the Thundercats' final defeat! Slithe: Don't be too sure, Jackalman. The Thundercats aren't finished yet! Monkian: Perhaps we should join in and make sure! Vultureman: No! Not until we have a plan to defeat the Lunataks. Jackalman: What--what are you saying, Vultureman? Vultureman: I know those Lunataks. Once they've beaten the Thundercats, they'll turn on us. And if we don't end up as their slaves, we better have a plan! Alluro: You don't stand a chance, Panthro. Give in now, while you still have a choice! Panthro: Put your money where your mouth is, whoever you are, and let's get to it! Alluro: But you are only a Thundercat, and I am a Lunatak! (hypnotically) Give in... put your weapons down... Panthro (slowly): ...who are you? Alluro: They call me Alluro. Now, put the nunchucks down. Panthro: No... I... Alluro: You don't stand a chance. Panthro: I don't stand a chance... [Panthro falls to his knees] Wily-Kit: Panthro! Snap out of it! [Wily-Kit picks up Panthro and flies away] Panthro: Wily-Kit... you'll never know just how close that was! I owe you one! Snarf: There must be something we can do, Lynx-O. Those Lunataks are winning! Lynx-O: Our one chance is to knock out SkyTomb. If I could only reverse the flow of energy to the Cats' Eye, so that instead of receiving and amplifying signals, it could transmit them. Switch the tower to maximum emergency power, my friend! [Snarf does] Now line up on SkyTomb! [the Cats' Eye fires a beam at SkyTomb] When I give you the word, Snarf, throw those four polarity reversal switches! Snarf: Just tell me when, Lynx-O. Lynx-O: Now! Mumm-Ra: So, my faithful Ma-Mutt, the Lunataks failed to destroy the Tower of Omens. Only I, Mumm-Ra, the Ever-Living, have the power to wipe the Thundercats off the face of Third Earth. Yet... I am still weak, Ma-Mutt. I have only but one choice: to call upon these ancient priests of evil, and beg them to restore my powers. But this is a desperate gamble, Ma-Mutt. Yes, you are right to be afraid, my pretty. These ancient ones will either grant me their combined power, or condemn to burn forever in demon fire! "Mumm-Ra Lives! - Part Four" Mumm-Ra (chanting): O mighty ancestors, progenitors of all the evil on Third Earth, forgive your feeble servant Mumm-Ra's intrusion upon your eternal rest. But, if you will not listen, Mumm-Ra the Ever-Living will cease to exist and the Code of Thundera, justice, truth, honor, and loyalty will spread throughout our domain! [Ma-Mutt begins barking] Mumm-Ra: Quiet, Ma-Mutt! The great ones hear us! [Ma-Mutt cowers; the statues come to live and surround Mumm-Ra in water] Mumm-Ra (chanting): Ancient spirits of evil, transform this decayed form to Mumm-Ra, the EverLiving! [pause] We did it, Ma-Mutt! We did it! Mumm-Ra, the Ever-Living is back on stage! Thundercats, my debut will be your final curtain! Lynx-O (about Snarfer): He's off-course! Snarf: I knew the kid would goof! Lion-O: Hey, wait a minute, Snarf. It might not be his fault! Lynx-O: It isn't. A thermo-conduit snapped. Snarf: I know darn well it wasn't his fault. He's my nephew after all!

[while watching Snarfer's ship's distress] Redeye: The miserable little creature is going to burn up! Luna: You fool! That's the last thing we need! Alluro: Why, Luna? What difference does it make to us? Tugmug: He's just a feeble Snarfer. They're a dime a dozen on the Planet of Snarfs. Luna: Thundercats and Snarfs have been allies for eons. That 'feeble Snarf' will be valuable to us! So keep tracking it, Redeye! Redeye: A pleasure, Luna. That little Snarf just doesn't stand a chance against my eyes! 'Follow him'... finished! Lynx-O: Wait a minute... he's done it! He's adjusted the angle of entry! He won't disintegrate! Snarf: That's my boy! That's my Snarfer! Lynx-O: It's not all good news, Snarf. Snarf: It's not? Lynx-O: He's going to land in Dark Side! [after crashing his ship] Snarfer: Ooh, exactly a textbook landing, but any landing you can walk away from is a great landing! Pumyra: If we don't find Snarfer but the Lunataks get to him... Bengali: I know, Pumyra! Try not to think about it... Lion-O: Lynx-O! What happened? Lynx-O: I think the Lunataks are jamming the Braille Board, Lion-O. And without the Braille Board, I am truly blind. [after Snarfer evades Tugmug] Snarfer: No one gets the jump on Snarfer, no sir! Alluro: Nice move! Snarfer: Who are you? Alluro: Impressive, all that jumping about! But... primitive. Now me, I'm different. I'm Alluro, and you don't stand a chance. [Alluro activates his Psyche Club] Alluro (hypnotically): Just give in... come quietly. You don't stand a chance... Snarfer: Snarfs never give in, no sir! Never say die! [after freezing Lion-O's throat] Chilla: Lost your voice, Thundercat? It's all over! [the other Thundercats arrive] Pumyra: Not yet, Lunatak! Bengali: Not by a long shot! Mumm-Ra: Is everyone on Third Earth incompetent, Ma-Mutt? Do we have to do everything ourselves? Then no one can I can beat these accursed Thundercats! Come then, faithful mutt, I am stronger than ever before. Now is the time to cleanse Third Earth and restore it to the glory of its evil days! Now is the time to eliminate Lion-O and his cowardly cohorts forever! Third Earth shall be free! "Mumm-Ra Lives! - Part Five" Mumm-Ra: Listen to your master, Ma-Mutt, Mumm-Ra, the Ever-Living. I have a plan, a Thundercat trap, and our friends the Lunataks are just the bait we need! Snarf: Snarfer! Where is he? Snarfer?

[Snarfer arrives] Snarf: What kept you? Snarfer: Huh? Snarf: Never mind! Did you check the pressure gauges? Snarfer: Yes sir, Uncle Snarf, I sure did! Right on the money! 78 pounds per square inch! Snarf: 78 pounds? It should be at least 94! Snarfer: Gee, are you sure, Uncle Snarf? For a generator this small? Snarf: Oh--oh, yeah, yeah, quite right. Just testing you, of course. Cats' Lair is different. [pause] Cats' Lair? The communications' hookup with Cats' Lair! I forgot to do it! Snarfer: That's okay, Uncle Snarf. I did that already! Panthro and Lion-O are talking right now! Redeye: We are ready to switch to automatic fuel-feed now. We can jettison these dumb slaves! [Mumm-Ra appears] Mumm-Ra: No, you fool! You cannot get rid of these slaves! Chilla: But Mumm-Ra, who needs them? They're deadweight! Tugmug: We'll be better off without them! Mumm-Ra: They are the perfect bait for the Thundercats. Redeye: Bait? You mean the Thundercats will try to rescue them? Tugmug: Why? They are worthless slaves! Mumm-Ra: The Thundercats have the foolish notion that all life is precious! Rest assured, they will come here and we will profit from their weakness! Lion-O: It's agreed then. Cheetara and Lynx-O will check out the dark Pyramid. Bengali, you stay here. Bengali: But Lion-O, I'll miss all the action! Lynx-O: We all have a part to play, Bengali. Lion-O is Lord of the Thundercats and you must respect his decision. Wily-Kat and Wily-Kit are on duty at Cats' Lair; you will be on duty here. Panthro: Besides, the Tower of Omens is not fully operational yet. And it's a ton of Thundrillium through a Bolkin's bonnet that we'll need your help before the day is out. Bengali: Yes, you're right! Lion-O: The rest of us will travel to the Dark Side and find SkyTomb. Once we've freed the slaves, we'll deal with those miserable Lunataks! Panthro: If we're going to do it.. All: Let's do it! Lion-O: If I remember right, the opening though to Dark Side should be coming up any moment. Panthro: Then I guess it's time to switch on the fog lamp. Let's hope it works! Lion-O: It'll work, Panthro. Nothing you invent would dare not to work! [inside the Black Pyramid] Lynx-O: I have the strange feeling that, for all its evil, this place has known great forces for good. Cheetara: Must have been in the mists of antiquity, Lynx-O; this has been Mumm-Ra's home for thousands of years! [Lynx-O steps on an object] Lynx-O: Wait, what is this? Cheetara: It looks like some kind of symbol! Lynx-O: A talisman of some sort! Strange... it does not feel as though it belongs in a place of evil... Mumm-Ra: Lunataks, the Thundercats are here! Redeye: How can they be, Mumm-Ra? The sensors haven't picked up any signals! Mumm-Ra: 'Sensors'? I, Mumm-Ra, the Ever-Living, have survived on Third Earth for thousands of years without sensors! I have no need for your feeble-minded technologies! I tell you, the Thundercats are here! Luna: Well, Lunataks, the Thundercats have come here to find us. So, let us go out and greet them!

Redeye: Looking for me, Thundercat? Tygra: Now you see me... [Tygra uses his whip to turn invisible] Tygra: ...now you don't! [Redeye sees Tygra with his heat vision] Redeye: Wrong, Thundercat! [Redeye blasts him] Redeye: You came to find Skytomb, Thundercat? I'll take you there! [after being blasted out of the Black Pyramid] Cheetara: What... what happened? Lynx-O: I don't know! But this talisman seems to have some kind life-force. A power that fights evil! Panthro: No sign of that blasted Skytomb anywhere! [Panthro sees Alluro in the Thunder-Tank] Panthro: What--? You've got a lot of nerve, friend. Now, get out of here! Alluro: Relax, Thundercat. You won't be needing the Thunder-Tank where you're going! [Panthro takes out his nunchucks] Panthro: Are you going to go the easy way, or the painful way? Alluro: Put those toys away, Thundercat. (hypnotically) You don't stand a chance! No one stands a chance against me. There's no point in fighting. Whatever you do, I'll have an answer! [Alluro appears to become a giant] Panthro (slowly): He's right. I don't understand it, but there's nothing I can do. Alluro: I'm better than you... stronger than you... give up! Panthro: He's better than me... stronger than me... I don't stand a chance... [Alluro grabs the nunchucks and ties him up with them] Alluro: So primitive these Thundercats! But he'll probably make a first-class stoker! Pumyra: Skytomb! Chilla: Welcome to Dark Side, Thundercat! [Chilla blasts her but Pumyra dodges] Chilla: I'll ice you yet, or my name's not Chilla! [Chilla blasts her and hits her] Chilla: Scratch: one frozen Thundercat! Lion-O: Thunder-Luna: Heeeelp! Lion-O: Thun...der... Luna: Heeelp me! Pleeeease heeeelp me! Heeeeeelp! I'm over heeeeeere! [Lion-O finds her] Lion-O: Who are you? What happened here? Luna: Please, help me up! [The Eye of Thundera growls; Amok attacks Lion-O from behind] Lion-O: What...? Luna: Squeeze him, Amok! Squeeze! Cheetara: Lion-O's in danger. I can feel it! Lynx-O: Then let us call the others: Bengali, and the Thunder-Kittens. We will need help! Cheetara: There's no time, Lynx-O. Besides, no one can pass through the Forest of Mists. Only you can navigate to Dark Side! Lynx-O: But... I don't have a Braille Board with me. Cheetara: That's the risk we'll have to take. We'll go slowly; I'll follow your directions to the inch. Now, let's hit it!

Luna: Good work, my friends! See how well we work together? Teamwork is what counts! Alluro: It has nothing to do with teamwork, Luna. The Thundercats are no match for us! Redeye: They are primitive, like the Mutants. Chilla: And hampered by outdated notions of honor, truth, justice, and loyalty... Tugmug: They are worthless! Luna: And you are overconfident, conceited fools! [Mumm-Ra appears] Mumm-Ra: She's right! Do not underestimate the Thundercats. After all, you have only captured four of them. There are still five out there! Cheetara: We did it! Some close calls, but we made it! Lynx-O: More by good fortune than good judgment, Cheetara. Cheetara: Fortune favors the bold, Lynx-O! Lynx-O: Then, let us hope it continues to favor us... [after the Thundercats break free] Mumm-Ra: No! You cannot escape me now! Lion-O: Take a look at yourself, Mumm-Ra! The reflection you cannot face, the reflection of your own evil! [Mumm-Ra laughs and knocks Lion-O down] Mumm-Ra: Ah, think again, Lion-O! When the ancients revived me, they made me more powerful than ever before! My reflection means nothing to me now! And now, nothing stands between you and total destruction! [Lynx-O raises the talisman] Lynx-O: Your evil will never destroy the Thundercats, Mumm-Ra. [the talisman glows and Mumm-Ra recoils] Alluro: That talisman! It is even more powerful than Mumm-Ra! Chilla: Whoever has it will defeat Mumm-Ra! Tugmug: And control Third Earth! Redeye: I must have it! Give it to me, old man! Chilla: No! I will take it! Alluro: It will be mine! Luna: Stop this, Lunataks! We must not fight amongst ourselves! We must not--aah! [the Lunataks begin hitting each other] Lynx-O: Take it! It's yours! [Lynx-O throws into the air] Luna: No! Noooo! We must work together! Aaaah! Panthro: I think this is a good a time as any to get out of here, Lion-O. Lion-O: I'm with you, Panthro! [they leave] "Catfight" Mumm-Ra: Ah, Luna! Welcome to my humble abode! Luna: Cut the small talk, Mumm-Ra. Just tell me about this plan of yours! Mumm-Ra: Very well, Luna. I will transform myself and appear before Lion-O in the guise of Jaga, the Wise. But I will sow the seeds of discord so that the Thundercats will fight amongst themselves and destroy each other. While the Thundercats attack each other, the Lunataks will attack Cats' Lair and the Tower of Omens. And then, we will rid Third Earth of the Thundercats forever! Luna: Hmm, it might work, I suppose... Mumm-Ra: Of course it will work! But first, the transformation! (to Ma-Mutt) I know, Ma-Mutt. Once I have used the Lunataks to beat the Thundercats, I will cast them aside. Luna (to Amok): As soon as we've beaten the Thundercats, we'll get rid of him... Mumm-Ra (chanting): Ancient spirits of evil, transform this decayed form to Mumm-Ra, the EverLiving! And now, o ancient ones, give me the bodily form of Jaga, the Wise!

[Mumm-Ra appears in the disguise of Jaga] Lion-O: I thought I heard... Jaga! Mumm-Ra (as Jaga): Yes, Lion-O. Beware Lynx-O, Bengali, Pumyra, and Snarfer -- the new Thundercats. They will try to destroy the true Thundercats and take over Third Earth for themselves! Lion-O: Surely this can't be true-Mumm-Ra: Heed my words, for I am Jaga the Wise! [vanishes] Lynx-O: Welcome, Turmagar! What brings you to the Tower of Omens? Mumm-Ra (as Turmagar): Once again our lands are threatened by the forces of evil. We need your help if we are to survive. Lynx-O: Say no more, Turmagar. Bengali, Pumyra, Snarfer; take the Thunder-Strike. I will alert the other Thundercats to meet you along the way. Bengali: Okay guys, let's hit the road! Lynx-O (on the viewscreen): The Tuskas are in trouble, and they need our help. Bengali, Pumyra, and Snarfer are already on their way. I suggest you rendezvous at coordinate 17. Panthro: No problem, Lynx-O! [turns off viewscreen] You heard what the man said. Let's go! Lion-O: No, wait! It's a trap! Panthro: A trap? Lion-O: Jaga appeared to me last night. He came to warn me about the Thundercats of the Tower of Omens. He says that they're treacherous, that they're trying to take over Third Earth. Cheetara: Lynx-O and his crew? Treacherous? There's got to be some mistake! Lion-O: Jaga is never wrong. But if you want to find out for yourselves, go check it out. Snarf: We'll do just that, Lion-O, and if I found that Snarfer's up to something, I'll teach him a lesson he'll never forget! [after Mumm-Ra in disguise fires from the Thunder-Strike at the Thunder-Tank] Snarf: Hey, that was too close for comfort! Cheetara: They fired on us! So it's true! They are renegades! Panthro: Looks like it. I guess we're just going to have to teach those turncoats a lesson! [after getting blasted by the Thunder-Tank] Bengali: Pumyra, Snarfer, are you okay? Pumyra: I think so. Snarfer: Yep! Bengali: Well, I don't know what's going on around here, but it looks like we're going to have to fight back! [Bengali opens fire on the others] Cheetara: Whoa, it looks like those guys really mean business. Panthro: Jaga was right. They're traitors, Cheetara, and now they're going to get what they deserve! Chilla: If we're going to attack the Tower of Omens and Cats' Lair, why don't we just do it? Luna: The Thundercats are no pushover! We're going to need all the help we can get. That's why, just this once, we're going along with Mumm-Ra's plan! Alluro (scornfully): Mumm-Ra? [Mumm-Ra appears] Mumm-Ra: Yes, Alluro? Alluro (fearfully): Aah, I was just saying we couldn't do without you! Mumm-Ra: Correct, Alluro. Thanks to me, the Thundercats are tearing each other apart! Cats' Lair and the Tower of Omens are almost unguarded. The time has come to attack! [after getting blasted by Tugmug]

Lion-O (struggling): The gravity carbine's made the Sword so heavy that I can't hold it! Tugmug: Now it's your turn to hit the floor! Luna: Lion-O is not going to give in easily. Blast him, Amok! Amok: Blast him! Blast him! Pumyra: Enough of this fooling around. Come on out, Cheetara! We'll fight it out, woman to woman. Or are you scared? Cheetara: 'Scared'? I'll show you scared! [seeing the signal] Bengali: Lion-O needs help! Panthro: Why should you care? You want to see us all destroyed! Pumyra: That's not true! You tried to run us down, remember? Cheetara: But you fired on us? Snarfer: No sir, that was the Turmagar fella.... and it looks like he's taken a powder. Snarf: Looks like we've all made a mistake. So why don't we call it quits and get going. Lion-O needs us! Luna: Looks like the odds have turned against us, Redeye, so get us out of here! Redeye: But what about Amok? Luna: He can look out for himself. Move it! Amok: Luna, wait! Wait for Amok! [in the Tower of Omens] Mumm-Ra: You're helpless without your light shield, Lynx-O, and soon all the other Thundercats will be helpless as kittens! You'll all be in the power of Mumm-Ra, the Ever-Living! Mumm-Ra: You'll regret this, Lion-O. Lunataks, destroy him! Chilla: Forget it, Mumm-Ra. We're not risking our necks to save your miserable hide. Alluro: It's been delightful, but we really can't stay! [they leave] Mumm-Ra: Come back, you cowards! Lion-O: Your allies have deserted you, Mumm-Ra. Your evil plan has failed. You might as well give in! Mumm-Ra: Don't deceive yourself, Lord of the Thundercats! Whatever happens, I will never give in to you, for I am Mumm-Ra, the Ever-Living! [after Tygra and the Kittens return] Tygra: Well, well, the gang's all here. What's going on, guys? Wily-Kit: Hey, we didn't miss anything, did we? Pumyra: Oh, nothing much. Just a civil war between the Thundercats. Panthro: And the Lunataks did attack Cats' Lair. Bengali: Uh, yes, and they captured the Tower of Omens, didn't they? Wily-Kat: And all this happened when we were away having lessons? Cheetara: Well, we learned a lesson too, Wily-Kat. We found out you better look before you leap. Panthro: Cheetara's right. We should have known Lynx-O, Bengali, Pumyra, and Snarfer were not traitors. Lion-O: And we should have made sure we knew what we were doing before we got into a fight with them! Snarf: Well, all I can say is, it's a good thing we stopped fighting when we did, because I was just about to pulverize Snarfer! Snarfer: Oh yeah? Let's settle it now! [Snarfer chases Snarf]

"Psych Out!" Mumm-Ra: Look into the cauldron, Alluro! That box contains a force greater than any on Third Earth! [Mumm-Ra conjures the image of a snake talisman] Mumm-Ra: The Igora Talisman! Alluro: You called me here to see the image of a trinket? Mumm-Ra: Insolent fool! Many centuries ago, I lost the Igora Talisman. But, every 1000 years, when the tip of my Pyramid aligns with the full moon, the Igora Talisman gains awesome power! Alluro: And the time for this alignment is near? Mumm-Ra: Correct, Lunatak. Alluro: But... why did you call me here to tell this little tale? Mumm-Ra: You think yourself, Alluro, a master of the mind? Alluro: There is no one on this or any other planet who can resist my mental powers! Mumm-Ra: Yet you have allowed Luna to lead you and others while you should be the rightful leader of the Lunataks. Alluro: You are very wise, Mumm-Ra. But how can this talisman help me defeat Luna and become leader of the Lunataks? Mumm-Ra: The Igora Talisman will multiple your power 1000 times. It makes whoever possesses it self-confident to the point of being invincible! Once you have the talisman, Luna will grovel at your feet! Find the Igora Talisman, Alluro, and we will rule Third Earth forever! Alluro: You've got a deal, Mumm-Ra! [Alluro leaves] Mumm-Ra (to Ma-Mutt): Patience, my pretty... once we have the Igora Talisman, we will turn that insolent Lunatak into dog food! [after Lion-O startles Snarf] Lion-O: Calm down, Snarf, it's only me! Snarf: Oh, Lion-O, you scared me half to death. How did you know where I was hiding? [Lion-O holds up a clump of hair] Lion-O: Rule number one of tracking: when you're being tracked, don't leave behind a trail of Snarf hair! Snarf: It must be the shedding season! Alluro: The riddle in this scroll that Mumm-Ra gave me should lead to the Igora Talisman. (reading) 'Through mountains high and valleys low, to find the Igora talisman you must go; through stormy mist, take the ride, till you reach the unlit side'. [Ma-Mutt shows up and attacks Alluro] Alluro: Cease, you mangy mutt! You miserable mongrel! [Alluro activates his Psyche Club] Alluro (hypnotically): You will release my pant leg, you miserable hound! You will release... and now, you will roll over and play dead. [pause] You have no choice. You will play dead! Very good, mongrel. Once I find the Igora Talisman, all of Third Earth will roll over play dead at my feet... even that bandaged bundle of bones Mumm-Ra! Lion-O: The Igora Talisman. Jaga has spoken of such a magical charm. Its bearer becomes supremely self-confident. Unbeatable! Snarf: There must be something we can do! Lion-O: We must find the Igora Talisman before Alluro. And we're going to need some help. Thunder! Thunder! Thundercats... ho! Lion-O: If we could only figure out that riddle we heard Alluro reading, it would lead us to the location of the Igora Talisman. 'Through stormy mist, take the ride, till you reach the unlit side'. Lynx-O: 'Stormy mist', 'unlit side'... Pumyra: 'Stormy mist'... that must mean the Forest of Mists! Lynx-O: You're absolutely right, Pumyra! The Igora Talisman must be in Dark Side!

[while flying through the Forest of Mists] Bengali: Calm down, Snarf. Lynx-O's gotten us through tougher spots than this before! Snarf: Don't speak too soon! Snarf: The next time we go looking for a Talisman, we ought to find our way around the Forest of Mists! Alluro: There will be no 'next time', Thundercats! [Alluro appears] Alluro: I beat you to the talisman, Thundercats, and that means I'm invincible! Lion-O: Actions speak louder than words, Lunatak. [Alluro lifts his Club] Alluro: Not so fast, Lion-O... Lion-O: Sword of Omens-Alluro: That pathetic Sword is worthless against me. (hypnotically) You do not even have the power to lift it! Lion-O: He's right! I can... barely lift the Sword! [Pumyra and Bengali run towards him, along with Lynx-O and Snarf] Alluro: Hold it right there, Thundercats! Lynx-O: What's happening? Pumyra: I can't move! Alluro: There's no point in fighting, Lion-O. Give it up! You don't have the power to defeat me. Lion-O: I...I don't have the power! I can't do it. Alluro: You don't stand a chance... Lion-O: I don't stand a chance. [drops the Sword] No power... no chance... he's right, I don't stand a chance... there's nothing I can do... Alluro: So much for the Lord of the Thundercats, reduced to a groveling lackey! Snarf: The Thundercats aren't finished yet, Lunatak! Alluro: They look pretty 'finished' to me, furball! And what can you do about it? You and that blind old man. I'm going after the rest of your friends now. And don't bother to warn them; it won't make any difference. They don't stand a chance, now that I possess the Igora Talisman! [Alluro leaves] Pumyra: Doesn't make any difference... Bengali: Don't stand a chance... Lion-O: No chance... Snarf: Do something, Lynx-O! Lynx-O: That's strange. Alluro's power over me has faded, yet his hold over Lion-O and Pumyra and Bengali seems to as strong as ever! Lynx-O: There must be a way to defeat Alluro and restore Lion-O and the others back to their normal states. Cheetara: Right now, Alluro holds all the cards. Even on his own, he is a formidable enemy. And now he has found Mumm-Ra's talisman, he seems to be invincible! Panthro: I just don't see how we can defeat him. Tygra: 'Don't see'... hmm, maybe that's our answer! Cheetara: What do you mean, Tygra? Lynx-O: I think Tygra means that the fact that I am blind may be to our advantage. Alluro's hold over Lion-O and Bengali is complete, but he never did completely overpower me. Perhaps that is because I can't see the light from his Psyche Club. Maybe I'm the one person who can get that blasted talisman away from Alluro. I've got to try it! Panthro: You can't go alone. You need someone to help pilot the Thunder-Strike. I'll go with you! Alluro: No need to fight me, Thundercats. It's futile. You will be defeated. Panthro: No! Never! Thundercats never surrender!

[after breaking Lynx-O's light shield] Alluro: You Thundercats are so easily controlled. I will control you all. The Igora Talisman makes me invincible! Third Earth will tremble at my feet! [The Thundercats stand in a circle in Cats' Lair and discard their weapons] Lion-O: There is nothing we can do, Thundercats. Alluro is invincible. Tygra: We're powerless. Wily-Kit: It's futile. Snarf: Lion-O, don't you remember! We're Thundercats! [picks up Lion-O's Sword] Remember, Lion-O? Thunder, thunder, thunder, Thundercats, ho? Lion-O: It's no use. We can't win. Snarf: Remember, Cheetara? Remember 'Thundercats, ho'? Cheetara: Alluro is invincible. Snarf: Poor old Snarf is the only Thundercat that Alluro didn't even try to control. He didn't think old Snarf was worth wasting his time on! Well, I'll show Alluro that Snarf is a Thundercat to be reckoned with! I'll find that Igora Talisman, become invincible, and I'll defeat Alluro! [the alarm goes off] Snarf: Something fishy going on! [Snarf goes to check it and sees Alluro land] Snarf: Alluro, prepare to meet your match! [after finding the box in Alluro's ship] Snarf: Hey! This is the box that contains the Igora Talisman Now I've got supreme selfconfidence! I'm... invincible! Alluro: But you cannot defeat Alluro, you wretched creature! [Alluro appears] Alluro: Give up, Thundercat. You cannot win. Snarf: Wrong, Alluro! I've got the Igora Talisman; I'm invincible! Alluro: You are a mere furry joke! Snarf: I'm no joke! I'm a Thundercat! [later] Snarf: ...then I said, 'Alluro, your days are numbered'. That's when I hit him with the old Snarf's one-two, and shattered that dumb ball on Alluro's Psyche Club! Lion-O: And since Alluro was defeated, and his Psyche Club was smashed, his psychological hold on the Thundercats was broken. Snarf: And with the Igora Talisman, I'm invincible! I never did open this box to see what the talisman looks like... [Snarf opens the box and sees the broken talisman] Snarf: The talisman was smashed! It never even gave me any special power! Lion-O: Snarf's self-confidence and power came from within himself, not from some external source! [Snarf moans] "The Mask of Gorgon" [seeing Lynx-O flying towards them] Snarf: Isn't Lynx-O a little old for joyriding? Lion-O: This is no game; something is terribly wrong! Pumyra: Lynx-O's lost his head! Bengali: I was bringing him to you, piloting from the left pod. Pumyra: But his central controls can cut out the pods-Bengali: He took over and-Pumyra: Lion-O, he'll destroy himself! Lion-O: We have to get him down. Panthro, fire up the Thunder-Claw!

Lion-O: Lynx-O! Lynx-O! Lynx-O: No... evil beyond evil... there is no defence against the power of the Gorgon! Aah! [Lion-O holds up his Sword] Lion-O: Listen to me, Lynx-O! I am Lion-O; you will allow me to board the Thunder-Strike. Now! [Lynx-O lets him in, then faints; Lion-O lands the ship] Lion-O: Pumyra, Bengali, what brought on this terrible attack? Pumyra: It was last night... he was at the Braille-Board in the Tower of Omens when his hand received information so terrible that... [flashback] Lynx-O: No, no! The pages turn, and their words bring madness! The Hills of Elfshima, the Mask of Gorgon, and the child... sight beyond sight brings evil beyond evil! [/flashback] Lion-O: What has the Eye of Thundera's sight beyond sight got to do with this? Bengali: Lynx-O couldn't tell us. He kept babbling about masks and books and a child. And what are the Hills of Elfshima? Lion-O: A forgotten range of hills behind Mumm-Ra's pyramid. Panthro: Lynx-O's a grand old warrior who's fought every form of evil. What could his hands have seen to affect him so terribly? Pumyra: There is no way of knowing. Lion-O: There is a way. Sword of Omens, give me sight beyond sight. [Lion-O sees a vision of a closed book] Lion-O: I see nothing but an ancient book. But there's an uneasy feeling that... that... Sword of Omens, show me more! [the book opens; the vision disappears] Lion-O: The Sword lost the vision! Whatever that volume is, its powers are unfathomable! [Mumm-Ra stands before a giant book] Mumm-Ra: The Book of Orbag: The only history of Third Earth, when there was no light, no joy, and all was evil. All the terrible secrets lost for an eon, then dug up, quite by accident, by a mummy's best friend while digging for a bone! Enough! Now, to bring forth the child, we must first get the Mask of Gorgon! Tugmug! Chilla! [Chilla and Tugmug appear] Chilla: Why this urgency, Mumm-Ra? Mumm-Ra: I have summoned you for a very special mission. Do you know the Treetop Kingdom of the Warrior Maidens? Chilla: That pack of musclebound Brunhildas? Mumm-Ra: The Maidens are charged with the guarding of a certain mask; the Mask of Gorgon! It is embedded in the trunk of Shemlock, the oldest and mightiest tree in the Kingdom! Destroy the tree, free the Mask of Gorgon, and bring it to me now! Nayda: Who are they, Willa? Willa: I don't know, Nayda. I can't recognize them. [Nayda runs to challenge Chilla] Nayda: Hold! Don't come one step closer! Chilla: I don't know why I waste my breath on you. [Chilla freezes Nayda] Willa: Got to get help! Thundercats, ho! [Willa swings away] Mumm-Ra: The Mask of Gorgon turned Tugmug to stone. Poor little Lunataks... but I had to see if the Mask really did flesh to stone. Better than risking either of us, eh, Ma-Mutt? Free now from the bark of Shemlock, I have only to find the proper incantation to call it here! [petting Ma-Mutt] Have no fear; the Mask of Gorgon cannot harm its master. Ah! Here is the incantation! (chanting) Mask of Gorgon, silver-white; I now claim thy evil might! Come to me, through mystery's mist;

flesh-to-stone, then stone to black! [The Mask appears to him] You are mine now, mine to command for all eternity! And my first command will be to turn the Thundercats to stone! Lion-O: You say the Lunataks froze Nayda, then stole a mask? Willa: The Mask of Gorgon! Forest creatures have always tended it. Lion-O: But why was it embedded in the bark of that tree? Willa: So that it always faced westward, away from the Hills of Elfshima. Panthro: Blast, those Elfshima Hills again. Why? Willa: The answer lies buried in the Norvag Nosh. Lion-O: Norvag Nosh? It's not lost any more, for I have seen it. Lynx-O: We both have seen it! Lion-O: Lynx-O! Lynx-O: And what my hands perceived drove me mad. But time is short. We must find that mask before... the Hills of Elfshima... Bengali: Easy, old friend. Here, sit. Lion-O: What do those blasted hills have to do with all this? Lynx-O: The child! The child! Don't you understand? Find that mask! [Lynx-O faints] [in Lion-O's vision] Mumm-Ra: Ah, Lion-O, cast the Eye of Thundera upon the Mask of Gorgon! This is the real power! You haven't the courage to recapture the Mask of Gorgon! Lion-O: You will call me 'coward'? Let's go, Panthro! We'll show Mumm-Ra who-Lynx-O: Don't be impetuous. The power of the Mask when combined with the Eye of Thundera... terrible... wait till I can guide you. The child must not live again! [Lion-O collapses] Panthro: We have to do something, and do it now. Both: Ho! Mumm-Ra: So, Lion-O, your foolish pride has delivered you into my hands along with the Sword of Omens! [he takes the Sword from Lion-O] It is written that when the Mask of Gorgon has sight beyond sight, then it not only turns flesh to stone, but stone to flesh! Observe! Lynx-O: Faster! Faster! It's almost daybreak. Bengali: But why the Hills of Elshima? Lynx-O: Look at your monitor screen. There is word: Elfshima. Norvog Nosh revealed to me that ancient anagram, a puzzle! I rearranged the letters and... Bengali (reading): 'I am flesh'! Lynx-O: Not a range of hills, but a sleeping giant! A giant turned to stone, thousands of years ago. A gigantic evil slave, and whoever masters this creature masters Third Earth. We will destroy the Gorgon; I have a way... [after reviving the giant] Mumm-Ra: Behold... the Child of Gorgon! Bengali: Lynx-O, we'll crash the blasted creature's head. Lynx-O: I'm aiming for the ear canal! [pause] I'm not mad, Bengali. We are in the giant's ear structure. This is the auditory canal. Ahead is the inner ear. When we reach it, I shall give it a blast from the laser cannon. The slightest disturbance in the inner ear affects balance! All right, blast! [they fire; the creature shrieks] Lynx-O: Now, to get the blazes out of here! Lion-O: Lynx-O, you were right. I should have waited for you. But Mumm-Ra made me so thundering angry! Lynx-O: You needn't apologize. Just remember: actions taken in a fit of anger are seldom

successful. Panthro: And I guess there's nothing heroic about losing your temper. Lion-O: Yeah! Hot heads get turned to stone and miss all the fun! Bengali: You call being a living earache 'fun'? "The Mad Bubbler" Alluro: According to this geological survey map, there is a Thundrillium mine on Hook Mountain. Premium Thundrillium! Some local superstition keeps these Third Earthers from entering the mine, so it's all ours! Luna: The Thundercats cannot survive without Thundrillium. If we control the supply, that would make us the undisputed kingpins of Third Earth! Chilla: What are we waiting for, Luna? Let's go get it! Lion-O: I'm off to the Berbil village to deliver these seedlings. I may not be back until this evening. Snarf: Take your time, Lion-O. I'm spending the day at the Tower of Omens, showing that nephew of mine how to hook up the tracking beam. Panthro: Need any help? Snarf: No I don't, thank you! I may not be the superheroic type, but I'm perfectly capable of installing a tracking unit! Lion-O: Snarf, anyone who can put up with all of us is pretty superheroic in my book. Snowman: Who are you? What do you want here? Luna: The answer to your questions are: A -- Lunataks, and B -- Thundrillium from that mine! Snowman: I forbid you to enter. It's too dangerous! Luna: Forbid me? Chilla: Stand back, Luna. I'll take care of this... primitive! [throws an ice-grenade at Snowman] Snowman: I am concerned about your safety, even if you are not! [sends an ice cage around Chilla] Luna: Show him who's boss, Chilla! [Chilla fires on them] [inside the mine] Chilla: Look, Luna! Pure Thundrillium! Luna: Ha, lucky for us these Third-Earthers are too cowardly to mine it! Mad Bubbler: Lucky for me, you're not! I am the Mad Bubbler! I am the Mad Bubbler! Welcome! I hope you like bubbles! [The Mad Bubbler traps them in bubbles] Chilla: I'm choking in here! Mad Bubbler: Breathe deeply and inhale the vapors of my madness! If there is any evil in your heart, the vapor will cause it to flourish and grow until you are consumed by your own violent evil impulses! Here is all that remains of the last mining party! They became victims of my madness, doomed to spend their days on an endless course of destructions! No one can escape! You are doomed to destroy or be destroyed! [the Mad Bubbler vanishes] Chilla, Luna, Amok: Destroy, or be destroyed! [they attack each other] Snarfer: Uncle Snarf is showing me how to hook up the tracking beam. Cheetara: Making any progress? Snarfer: Ooh, you betcha, yes sirree Bob, no problems! [Snarf gets electrocuted] Snarfer: Well... maybe a minor snag! Snarf: 'Minor' snag? I'd hate to see what he calls a major snag!

Snowman: Some creatures that call themselves 'Lunataks' have gone into the Thundrillium mine. Tygra: That mine is full of premium Thundrillium. We can't let the Lunataks get their hands on that. Panthro: We'll stop them, Snowman. Bet on it! Snowman: But you can't go in there. Others have gone in, but no one has come out. Panthro: With all due respect, Snowman, they weren't Thundercats! [after capturing the Thundercats in his bubbles] Mad Bubbler: Struggle as hard as you like, Thundercats, but there is no escape, no cure for my madness! In every heart, there are the seeds of evil. Breathe deeply, Thundercats, and those seeds will flower! You will be the seeds of your own destruction! Mad Bubbler: Destroy, or be destroyed! [he traps the Snarfs in bubbles and leave, but they escape] Snarf: What'd he say? Snarfer: Beats me. Some character, huh? [after being rescued] Tygra: Snarf, Snarfer, you saved our lives. Snarf: All in a day's work, Tygra. Snarfer: That's what we Snarfs are here for. Yes sirree boss! All: Thundercats, ho! "Together We Stand" Lion-O: Cheetara, are you okay? Cheetara: It was like a bomb going off in my head! Lion-O: Sword of Omens, give me sight beyond sight! [The Eye sees nothing] You're right! There is something out there, but whatever it is, not even the Eye of Thundera can see into it. Mumm-Ra: O ageless forces of darkness, once Third Earth was ours to pillage and despoil... but the Thundercats have invaded us with justice, truth, honor, and loyalty! Give me the power to return us to our glory! Hammerhand: What would you be wanting with us, Mumm-Ra? Mumm-Ra: I seek an alliance to plunder the high seas of Third Earth. [the Berserkers clamor] Mumm-Ra: But first we must remove the Thundercats! Your part will be to capture their accursed Tower of Omens and I shall give you the power you need to accomplish the task! [throws a chalice into the pool] A quick dip in the magical cauldron will coat your weapons with Thundrainium, the mystical metal that renders the Thundercats powerless! Rambam: No thanks! We had about two months ago, two months ago! Hammerhand: Aye, we do need more power to defeat the vile cats, tis true! [throws Top-Spinner into the cauldron] Mumm-Ra: The Thundercats in the Tower of Omens are doomed. And when their miserable friends try to rescue them, their lair will be mine as well. [after capturing Pumyra] Hammerhand: Hold her there! Now we'll use her for bait, lay her out to hook bigger fish! Catfish, heh heh! Hammerhand: After him, lads! Go berserk! Bengali: Hammer of Thundera, strike for justice, truth, honor, and loyalty! [begins blasting with his Hammer of Thundera] Top-Spinner: Give up, give up, no Thundercat has a chance of Thundrainium, Thundrainium!

Bengali: The Berserkers are armed with Thundrainium; I must get Pumyra before I'm took weak to help her... [throws a smoke bomb into the air] Lynx-O: Quick, get Pumyra into the other pod. Bengali: But the pod only holds two, and they have Thundrainium weapons. I can't leave you at their mercy! Lynx-O: Please do not worry about me. There is little time! Go! Mumm-Ra: So, the Thundercats rush from their lair to rescue their feline friends. Good! They too shall succumb to the Thundrainium! (to Ma-Mutt) Now go! Fly to Skytomb and summon Luna to me! [Ma-Mutt flies off] While the Berserkers defeat Lion-O and the others, the Lunataks will invade their loathsome lair. And once I have cleared them from Third Earth, no one will challenge my ever-living reign of terror! Luna: Reveal yourself, Mumm-Ra, and tell me why you have sent for me. [Mumm-Ra appears] Mumm-Ra: I have information concerning the Thundercats which you may find of interest... Behold! [the image of the Cats' Lair appear] Luna: So? The cat box? What of it? Mumm-Ra: Oh, patience. There is more to tell. [an image of Wily-Kat, Wily-Kit, and Snarf appears] Mumm-Ra: Those you see are the only ones there present. I thought you might help them give their elders a warm welcome when they return... assuming of course you are capable of crushing a couple of kittens... Luna: Those Thundercats have been nothing but trouble! Nothing will give me greater pleasure than to be rid of them! Tygra: We're nearing the Tower of Omens, Lion-O! Lion-O: We're going low to catch the Berserkers off guard. Let's hope we got here in time... [after firing on the Berserkers] Tygra: My cannon cannot penetrate the Berserkers' armor. Only Thundrainium can give it such power! Lion-O: Thundrainium... maybe we can rub it off them. Follow me into a tight bank, then circle at top speed! [the whirlwind blows off the Thundrainium] Hammerhand: Aargh, the storm has passed! After 'em, me lads! [in the Tower of Omens] Lion-O: Will be all right? Pumyra: His wound doesn't seem too serious, and I've treated him with all the healing skills I learned on Thundera, but he is older... Lion-O (to Lynx-O): Friend of my father and fellow Thundercat, we need you here on Third Earth with us! [Jaga appears] Jaga: The Eye of Thundera holds many powers in the hands of the Lord of the Thundercats. Call on them now, Lion-O! [Jaga disappears; Lion-O draws the Sword] Lion-O: Mystic Eye of Thundera -- I, Lion-O, Lord of the Thundercats, call on your magic powers to heal our friend Lynx-O. [the Eye's beam heals Lynx-O] Lynx-O: What... what happened? Where am I? Pumyra: You're safe and sound in the Tower of Omens, old friend!

Lynx-O: Tower of Omens to Cats' Lair, come in! [Alluro appears on the viewscreen] Alluro: Ah, brave Thundercats! We knew you would defeat the Berserkers. Lion-O: Alluro! What are you doing in Cats' Lair? Alluro: See for yourself... [reveal Wily-Kit, Wily-Kat, and Snarf serving the Lunataks] Alluro: Don't they look happy and content? You will be too. (hypnotically) Come home... come home to serve us... Lion-O (whispering): Tygra, follow my lead. [Lion-O and Tygra pretend to be hypnotized and walk to the elevator] [seeing Lion-O and Tygra] Alluro: What a fine-looking pair! They will make excellent slaves, eh, Tugmug? Tugmug: They surely will! Alluro: You are happy to be here, to serve, to serve us. Lion-O, Tygra (dully): Happy to serve us! Alluro: You will take that hideous Cats' symbol down off the wall and replace it with this beautiful moon! [Lion-O draws his Sword] Lion-O: Thunder! Thunder! Thundercats, ho! [seeing the trashed dining hall] Lion-O: What a mess! Snarf: That Alluro! I can't believe what he made us do! Wily-Kat: It even looked like you and Tygra were in his power. Wily-Kit: How did you break his spell? Snarf: Yeah, come on, Lion-O, tell me how you did it! Lion-O: Sorry, Snarf. I couldn't hear you! [takes earplugs out of his ears] Tygra and I plugged our ears so Alluro's voice couldn't get to us. Now what were you saying? Tygra: Those Lunataks really tore up the place. We better clean up. Snarf: I'd rather face those Lunataks in battle than clean up after 'em! Lion-O: Come on, Snarf, we'll all pitch in and do the job Thundercat-style, as a team! "Time Switch" Lion-O: Careful, Tygra! That time capsule is dangerous cargo! Tygra: I know, Lion-O! Those suspended animation gases are very unstable. That capsule could blow apart at any minute! Lion-O: The sooner we get this thing buried, the better I like it. Take it a bit to the right. Tygra: You got it! [after being hit by the suspended animation gases] Tygra: Lion-O, are you all right? Lion-O: 'All right'? I feel great! Really great! [laughs childishly] Tygra: I'm afraid I have some very bad news. Cheetara: What's happened? Snarf: Where's Lion-O? [Young Lion-O enters on a spaceboard] Young Lion-O: These spaceboards are so neat! Tygra: Lion-O is in terrible danger. If the effects of the gas can't be stopped, Lion-O will get younger and younger, becoming one day old, one minute old, one second old... then nonexistent! Cheetara: There must be something we can do.

Tygra: Well, we might have one chance; we might be able to reverse the effects of the gas if we can put Lion-O into the Cave of Time. The Cave advances the passage of time and-Panthro: Tygra, that's dangerous. You almost died in the Cave of Time! Tygra: We'd have to pull Lion-O out of the cave at just the right time. It is dangerous... but right now, it's the only choice we've got. [at SkyTomb, before the viewscreen] Luna: A miniature Thundercat, just ripe for the picking! Young Lion-O: Hey, Snarf, we can get to that Cave by ourselves. I'm Lord of the Thundercats, remember? Maybe on the way to that Cave we'll get some bad guys! Snarf: But Lion-O, you're just a little boy! And you didn't eat your breakfast yet, and-Young Lion-O: Worry, worry, worry! We're going to have fun, Snarfy! Don't be such a wimpydimpy! [runs off] Come on, Snarf, catch me if you can! Luna: 'Worry worry wimpy-dimpy'! Well, you miserable little squirt, I'll make sure you never reach the Cave of Time... and that will be one less Thundercat to deal with! Young Lion-O: Boy, Snarf, I wish I was a grownup. Then I'd get to drive the Thunder-Tank and fight the bad guys and-Snarf: You've got to make the best of who you are now, Lion-O. 'Now' is all anybody's ever got! Snarf: No, Lion-O! That's the River of Despair! We have to cross it further upstream! Young Lion-O: So it's the River of Despair, so what? It's still just a river! [pause] What does 'despair' mean? Snarf: Whoever set that trap for the Tongue-a-saurus sure did us a favor? [the Lunataks appear] Luna: No such luck, Thundercats! That trap was meant for you! Snarf: For us? Chilla: Take it easy, Thundercats! Everything will be cool... [Chilla blows ice at Lion-O] Snarf: Back off, Lunatak, or you'll have old Snarf to reckon with. Chilla: Take a chill pill, furball! [Chilla blows ice at Snarf] [in SkyTomb] Luna: So, the Lord of the Thundercats, a little child! Before I finish you off, I will study the process that caused you to regain your youth, and I will use to regain my youth! Young Lion-O: You just wait till I tell Panthro what you guys did. He'll turn you into Berbil food! [after escaping] Young Lion-O: Wow, I really fooled them that time, huh? Those two were no match for the Lord of the Thundercats! Why I had them--aaah! [a trapdoor opens underneath them] [in Luna's cell] Baby Lion-O: Lion-O too little! Lion-O hungry! When we go home? Luna: You'll never go home! You're trapped in here until you fade away! Chilla: The heat is on, Thundercats! Cheetara: Aah! Panthro: Cheetara's in trouble! Tygra: We're all in trouble!

[after being captured] Panthro: I thought it would be tough to get into SkyTomb. Guess it wasn't that tough after all... Tygra: The really tough part is going to be getting out! [Lion-O begins shrinking] Cheetara: Tygra, what's happening to Lion-O? Tygra: He's down to two years old! He doesn't have much time left; we've got to get him out of here! Wait, maybe... maybe Lion-O can get us out. Now that Lion-O is smaler, maybe he can fit through these bars and open the door from outside. Want to give it a try, little fella? Baby Lion-O: Lion-O Thundercat! [Baby Lion-O opens the cage] Thundercats ho! Others: Ho! Luna: I masterminded the conquest of the Thundercats. The Sword is rightfully mine! Chilla: You didn't lift a finger to defeat them! The Sword belongs to me! Tygra: Please, Lion-O! Stop crying and go into the Cave. Panthro: Maybe I can carry him into the Cave myself. Tygra: No way, Panthro! You and I are too old; the Cave of Time would age us too quickly, it would kill us. Lion-O is much younger than we. The Cave will advance him to his normal age, then we'll pull him out with this rope. If we could only make him stop crying, maybe he'd crawl into the Cave! Panthro: Maybe this will get the little guy to stop all that hollering! [picks up Baby Lion-O] Look at Panthro, little fella! Ooh ooh gaa gaa goo goo! [sticks his tongue out; Baby Lion-O keeps crying] Cheetara: Maybe this will stop his crying... [Cheetara rubs his back but he keeps crying] Snarf: I've got an idea. Hey, Panthro, do you still keep those emergency rations in the ThunderTank? Panthro: Snarf, this is no time to think about eating! Snarf: You don't understand, Panthro. Lion-O hasn't eaten in hours! It's way past his feeding time. Maybe he's crying because he's hungry! Panthro: Well, we've tried everything else. Might as give it a shot! [gets the food] Emergency sea rations, just like mother used to make! Snarf: I sure hope this works! [Adult Lion-O emerges from the cave] Panthro: Jumping Jupiter, it worked! Lion-O: I... I don't understand. Memories... hazy. Where have I been, and where in the world did I get this biscuit? It's hard as a rock! Nearly broke my tooth on it! Tygra: Will you look at that? Cheetara: When Lion-O was transformed into a child, he caused more trouble than a pack of bobcats! (reading Lion-O's graffiti) 'Lion-O was here'! Panthro: And he left teething marks all over my nunchucks! Snarf: And my tail! Panthro: Lion-O, it's good to have you back to your old self. Cheetara: You were one of the most mischievous little kittens I've ever seen. Lion-O: Well... I don't remember exactly what happened, but from I heard, I was a real wildcat. Panthro, I heard what happened to your nunchucks, so I made you a new weapon! [holds up the biscuit attached to a chain] "The Sound Stones" Slithe: For the last time, Vultureman, no! I've had it with you and your half-baked inventions! Vultureman: I'm telling you, this plan will work! Jackalman: Oh sure! We've heard it before and we're sick of it. You're always coming up with some new surefire weapon to take over Third Earth, but so far we've been on the losing end of every encounter!

Vultureman: Aah, okay, so we've had some setbacks, but this map shows us where to find the legendary Sound Stones of Dark Side! And if I can get my hands on a Sound Stone, I can produce the ultimate sonic gun, a weapon which will blast the Thundercats off the face of Third Earth! Slithe: Enough of this nonsense, Vultureman! The Thundercats are not going to be afraid of a little noise! Vultureman: 'A little noise'-Jackalman: Face it, Vultureman, you just don't have what it takes to defeat the Thundercats. This time, you're on your own. Vultureman: So that's the way it is, huh? Well, fine! I'll take out the Thundercats on my own! I, Mutant genius, will work alone! I'll design the Sonic Gun, and I'll build it around a Sound Stone from Darkside, which I'll find by myself! [while watching Vultureman in the viewscreen] Alluro: It looks like Vultureman is doing some sightseeing in Dark Side. What is he up to? Luna: Beats me! Let's make a landing, grab him, and find out. Chilla: So, Vultureman, what brings you to Dark Side? Vultureman: None of your business, Chilla! [Chilla freezes Vultureman's throat] Chilla: Perhaps I can persuade you it is my business, Beaky! [Chilla unfreezes Vultureman's throat] Vultureman: I came for this, a Sound Stone. I'm going to build a Sonic Gun which will make me the most powerful force on Third Earth. Tugmug: Hmm, 'the most powerful force on Third Earth', eh? Why don't you come back to SkyTomb and tell us all about this Sonic Gun? Vultureman: Uh... thanks, but I'm working alone on this caper. Chilla: Au contraire, Vultureman. From now on, you're working for us! [Lynx-O groans] Bengali: What is it, Lynx-O? What is the matter? Lynx-O: That... that noise! That sound! It's unbearable! Pumyra: But I don't hear a thing! Lynx-O: You wouldn't, not at this distance. But my hearing is more developed; the decibel level is almost deadly! I must trace the source! Aaaah! Must measure the sound level... Lion-O: How's it going, Panthro? Panthro: Not well. I've tried every crystallized power source in the book! None of them produce the right note or hold it long enough. I can't imagine what the Lunataks are using to generate that frequency. Lion-O: We've got to come up with something soon, Panthro. The Lunataks could attack at anywhere, at any time. Wily-Kat (off-screen): Lion-O! Panthro! Get up here quick! Lynx-O's calling! Trouble at the Tower of Omens! Snarf: Looks like that time is now! Pumyra: Look! Lion-O's in trouble! Bengali: But how can we help him? The Thunder-Strike won't move fast enough as a unit, and we can't leave Lynx-O to pilot it alone. Lynx-O: That sonic wave may have neutralized my Braille-Board, but it didn't neutralize my ability to judge speed and disaster. I can pilot my way back to the Lair from memory. Go to Lion-O; he needs you more than I do! Panthro: I've analyzed all the recordings and I'm positive that the power source Vultureman is using is one of the legendary Sound Stones of Dark Side. Snarfer: Uh oh! That's bad news!

Lion-O: You know about the Sound Stones, Snarfer? Snarfer: Well, according to legend, the Sound Stones of Dark Side are guarded by the priestess Soundora! Panthro: We've got to get hold of one of those Stones. It's our only hope. Snarfer, do you think you could figure out where in Dark Side we should look? Snarfer: Gee, Panthro, I'll give it a shot, but heck, it's only a legend. Snarf: You get yourself to the Lair library and look up that information before Vultureman has a chance to play 'Plun-Darr' with our eardrums again! Snarfer: Y-yes sir, Uncle Snarf! You got it! [Runs off] Lion-O: Cheetara, you organize a ground patrol to retake the Tower of Omens when we get back with the Sound Stone. [at Soundora's temple] Snarfer: This place is creepy! Panthro: Well, if we're going to do it, let's do it! [seeing the Sound Stone chamber entrance] Panthro: That looks promising! Snarfer: Depends what you mean by 'promising'! Tugmug: I say let's load the Sonic Gun into Skytomb, go to Cats' Lair, and lower the sonic boom now! I'm tired of waiting! Redeye: The wait is over, Tugmug! We've got company! Soundora: I am Soundora, keeper of the realm! Who is it that comes to take a Sound Stone, yet claims not to be of evil? Lion-O: I am Lion-O, Lord of the Thundercats. And we would not take the stone without your permission, Soundora... but we do need it badly. The evil Vultureman, who stole the other Stone, is using it to attack our people. Soundora: By your voice, I know you to be good, and your cause just. You make the Sound Stone. I must warn you, Vultureman's Stone is very powerful. If you are to defeat him with this Stone, you will need a warrior who understands the power of sound. [Lion-O glances back at Lynx-O and smiles] Lion-O: I think I know just the guy for the job! Cheetara: Good. They still haven't seen us. Redeye: So, Cheetara, did you really think you could stay out of my eyesight? [Redeye throws a weapon at Cheetara, who dodges] Chilla: Not bad, Cheetara, but let me show you a really cool move! Cheetara (to herself): If I time this just right... [Cheetara dodges Chilla and Redeye's blasts, causing them to strike each other] Alluro: This Thundercat will be finished, when I put the fear of Alluro into him! [Alluro throws his Psyche Club's ball at Bengali, but the Thunder-Kittens deflect it] Wily-Kit: Have a little case of your medicine, Alluro! Bengali: Thank you, Thunder-Kittens. That was a close one! [Tugmug is blasting Pumyra misses] Tygra: Such a lousy shot! I bet you can't even hit me! [Tugmug shoots and misses] [inside SkyTomb] Luna: Bumbling buffoons! This has gone on long enough, Vultureman! Fire up the Sonic Gun and bury those Thundercats once and for all! [later] Do it, Vultureman! Do it now! [the Sonic Gun blasts the Thundercats] Luna: Ha! They're done for! They're-[Lynx-O's Sonic Gun blasts Vultureman's ship]

Lion-O: I have returned the Sound Stone as I promised, Soundora. On behalf of the Thundercats, and all the people of Third Earth, thank you for your help. Soundora: Wait, Lion-O. For centuries we have guarded the Sound Stones well. But now things have changed; Mutants and Lunataks know of their power, and if they ever stole all the Stones, Third Earth would know a new master. [the Sound Stones vanish] Lion-O: What happened to them? Soundora: They are safe in another dimension, Lord of the Thundercats. Your enemies will never again threaten Third Earth with the Sound Stones. Lion-O: Once again I thank you, Soundora. Our enemies are many and powerful. We need all the help we can get if Third Earth is to be free. Soundora: One day Third Earth will be free, Lion-O. One day, you and the Thundercats will achieve that goal, because you work together, and because you have right on your side. Lion-O: I'm afraid just being right is not enough. We have to fight for our beliefs, and that takes power. Soundara: As long as you Thundercats work together, Lion-O, you will have that power. Lion-O: That is true. I guess we just have to hope that the Lunataks, the Mutants, and Mumm-Ra will never learn that kind of teamwork. Soundara: If that day comes, you can always count on me. Until then... [Soundara vanishes] Lion-O: Thundercats, ho! "Day of the Eclipse" Mumm-Ra: This is a special day, Ma-Mutt! A red-letter day! A day for which I have waited for one hundred years! Why? My pretty putrid pet, that is why! [points to carvings on the wall] Every one hundred years, Third Earth enjoys a total eclipse of the Sun. And any spell I choose to cast on this one day will last until the next eclipse! Today is the day of the eclipse, my dreadful dog, and we will make today the day of decay! First, we'll make Cats' Lair crumble to dust! Then we'll let loose the Mutants and the Lunataks on the pathetically innocent creatures on Third Earth! After today, no one will question my evil dominion over this miserable microcosm! [Ma-Mutt barks] Ancient spirits of evil, granting me your special power on this day of the eclipse! Turn your magical might against Cats' Lair! Cause stone to crumble and steel to corrode, systems to fail, and friends to quarrel! Make today the Thundercats' last day on Third Earth! Make today the day of decay! Lion-O: It's really strange. I've never seen the moon shine brightly in the middle of the day. Panthro: It'll get stranger, Lion-O! Wait till you see the moon cover the Sun. Now that's strange! It'll be like a permanent twilight... kind of spooky! Cheetara: It's beautiful! [lightning flashes] What on Third Earth? Tygra: A weather disturbance, due to the eclipse... I presume... Mumm-Ra: It's happening at last! Soon Cats' Lair will crumble around the Thundercats' cankered ears! [a valve breaks off in Panthro's hand] Panthro: Huh? That's odd! This valve just broke off in my hand, and I only replaced it this morning! [the Mutants are shelling the Berbil village] Monkian (singsong): Berbils! Jackalman: This is like shooting fish in a barrel! Monkian: It's sure to bring the Thundercats... Jackalman: ...and if Mumm-Ra's right, it'll be a piece of cake to take them down in a useless toy

tank! Lion-O: I thought you said you tuned up the Thundercat. Panthro: I did, but she sure is handling funny! [looks up] Uh-oh, look up ahead! [Jackalman and Monkian fly in] Jackalman: Welcome to the party, Thundercats! Your farewell party! [after their weapons all fail] Panthro: All our weapons' systems are out. We'll have to run for cover or the Thunder-Tank will be Thunder-junk! Ro-Bear Bill: Panthro? Are you all right? Lion-O: We're fine, Ro-Bear Bill. But why did we go out of control? Panthro: I don't know, but I'm going to find out. What in Great Thundera? This blasted megacondenser's shot! Corroded! Rusted! Useless! There's something strange going down here, LionO. All these equipment failures... and we know we check everything regularly. Routine maintenance is the basis of efficient operation! [spotting Tygra and Cheetara on the Cats' head] Redeye: Look at them, Tugmug. Sitting ducks! Mumm-Ra wants their hides... let's knock them down a peg! [starts blasting] Cheetara: You're off your turf, Tugmug! [speeds past him] Tugmug: It's no use, Thundercat! It doesn't matter how fast you move. No one can outrun Tugmug! [after defeating Tugmug] Cheetara: Tugmug is stuck in the mud, but it won't hold him for long. Tygra: And it's only a matter of time before Redeye is back in action! Let's back to the lair and do what we can to protect it! Lion-O: The Lair is under attack, and all the defenses are malfunctioning. First the Tank, now the Lair. There is no logical explanation for all these disasters. This has to be Mumm-Ra's evil work. I'm going to pay a visit to the Pyramid and stop all this nonsense at its source! [after finding the hieroglyphs in the Black Pyramid] Lion-O (reading): 'An evil spell cast during one eclipse will remain in effect until the next eclipse.' Mumm-Ra: And this eclipse, my Day of Decay, is ending! You'll have to wait another hundred years for this spell to wear off, Thundercat! Lion-O: We'll see about that, Mumm-Ra! Lion-O: Maybe I can create my own eclipse. Thunder! Thunder! Thundercats... ho! [after repairing the Lair] Cheetara: All the communication channels are open. Tygra: If anything, the computers are functioning better than they did before! Lion-O: Ha ha, maybe Mumm-Ra's magic did us more good than harm. Let's remember to thank him the next time we see him! Where's Snarf? Panthro: He said that after a day like today, we deserve a little of his style of magic, and he's bringing us some wonderleaf tea! "Sideswipe" Mandora: Chilla is no doubt hiding out in some inaccessible spot, and we'll have to be-[Chilla swoops past] Hey, that's her! That nervy law-breaker is asking for it! If she wants pursuit,

she'll get it! "Mumm-Rana's Belt" Wily-Kat: That was a great story, Snarf! Tell us another one! Wily-Kit: Tell us the story of Queen Luna and the Magic Belt. That's my favorite, and Pumyra's never heard it! Pumyra: Please tell it, Snarf. Snarf: Queen Luna, huh? Luna (to herself): Watch it, furball! That's my grandmother you're talking about! Snarf: Once upon a time, in the ancient days of Third Earth, there was a wicked queen who fought on the side of evil! Her name was Queen Luna, and around her waist she wore an ancient mystical belt of gold. The belt was the source of all her great magical powers, but she misused her powers and sought to make slaves of the people of Third Earth! She made slaves of the Wolos and the Berbils. Then she forced them to work in the underground Thundrillium mines. Not even the Warrior Maidens could defeat her! There was only one being on Third Earth was strong as Queen Luna, and that was Mumm-Rana! [flashback to fight between Mumm-Rana and Luna, and Mumm-Rana wins] Snarf: Mumm-Rana returned to the White Pyramid, and ever since that day she has been the guardian of the magic belt and all its powers! And according to the legend, as long as MummRana keeps the magic belt, the people of Third Earth are free from slavery! Luna (to Amok): So that's what happened to Grandmother's belt! That belt belongs to me, Amok, and now that I know where it is, I intend to get it back! [Luna and Amok are smashing the White Pyramid] Mumm-Rana: Old enemies disturb the sleep of Mumm-Rana! (chanting) Ancient powers of goodness, transform this--- ahhh! [Mumm-Rana collapses] [after Luna puts on the magic belt] Luna: Tremble and quake, Third Earth! Princess Luna is back to terrorize your miserable, worthless lives! Pumyra: I'm too late! [enters the White Pyramid] The belt! I must find Mumm-Rana's magic belt! Luna: It's in good hands, Thundercat! [blasts Pumyra] [Amok is sealing Luna up in the wall] Luna: Seal her up, Amok! You do good work, Amok. Maybe that should be your new job; bricklayer at the Thundrillium help! Amok: But... I go where you go. Luna: I don't need you any more! Princess Luna, the All-Powerful, doesn't need anybody! Finish this up, then report the mine! I have my own plans: the enslavement of the Mutants, the destruction of the Mutants, and the elimination of the Thundercats! [Luna is banging on the door while the Mutants play cards] Monkian: We're not home! Slithe: Nobody here, yess! Both: Leave! [Luna storms in] Luna: Stand up when Princess Luna comes into the room! Monkian: Luna? Is that you? Luna: From now on, Mutant, I am your Royal Highness, the Princess Luna! And I've got a job for you two, so step lively! Amok: It's not fair. Luna sent faithful Amok away. Not fair! I show her. Amok get revenge! Luna will regret day she messed with Amok! [starts smashing at the wall where Pumyra is trapped; Pumyra escapes and goes to Mumm-Rana]

Pumyra: Wake up, Mumm-Rana! Wake up! Third Earth is in terrible danger! Mumm-Rana: The power of the White Pyramid has been destroyed. I cannot awake. Cannot transform. Pumyra: But you are the only power on Third Earth who can control the power of the magic belt. Mumm-Rana: Without the power of the White Pyramid, I can do nothing. Until the White Pyramid is restored, I must rest... Pumyra: Then I must confront Princess Luna myself! Panthro: It's Luna! And look what she's wearing: the legendary magic belt! Luna: You've got it, Thundercats! And now that I've got the belt, I'll finish what my grandmother started! Lion-O: Not while we're on the scene, Luna! Thundercats... ho! Panthro: Hold on, Lion-O! I'll settle this! Monkian: Let him have it, Your Wickedness! Luna: I'll let him have it all right, but you two bring me that Sword! I'd like a souvenir of the day I put these two on the hot seat! [starts blasting Panthro] Mumm-Rana: The power of the White Pyramid is being restored! I can feel my strength returning! The Lord of the Thundercats calls for my help; once more, the time has come for me to face Princess Luna, and for good to prevail over evil. [Mumm-Rana appears] Luna: Mumm-Rana! Mumm-Rana: Yes, Princess! It is I, your nemesis! [knocks Luna out] Luna: Amok! Amok! Quick, throw me the belt! [Amok throws the belt down] Luna: Now, you wait till I catch up with you. I'm going to whip some sense into your stupid head! [looks at the belt] You could have least thrown it to me! [Amok picks up a rock] Luna: No! No! Amok, noo! [Amok knocks the belt into the chasm with the rock] Luna: No, look what you've done! You've destroyed it! I'm finished it! No more Luna, the AllPowerful! [Amok picks Luna up and puts him on her back] Luna: Let's get out of here! Well, come on, what are you waiting for? [Amok growls] Okay! Okay! I'm... sorry! [Amok charges away] Wily-Kat: What an adventure! I can't believe we missed it! "Hachiman's Honor" Luna (off-screen): Samurai, help me! Hachiman: Who calls Hachiman? Luna: Me! Hachiman: Who are you? What has happened here? Luna: I slipped off the trail! Please help me up! [Hachiman helps her up] Hachiman: You must be more careful, little one. These mountains are treacherous. Luna: Oh, thank you! Come to my cave, samurai. I will reward you for your good deed! Hachiman: No reward is necessary, little one! Good-bye! [lightning flashes] Luna: But... but a storm is coming! I don't think I can get home all by myself! Hachiman: Very well, but we must hurry! My friends, the Thundercats, are expecting me to arrive

at the Tower of Omens today! Luna: The Thundercats? Oh my, you can't keep them waiting! Alluro: Ah, Hachiman! We've been waiting for you! Hachiman: Who are you? What do you want? Luna: Calm yourself, samurai. These are my friends, and all we want is your sword, the ThunderCutter! Hachiman: Hiyah! [draws his sword] Do nothing you would live to regret! Alluro: My, such a brave sword-swinger! We'll have to do something about that... [draws his Psyche Club and hypnotizes Hachiman] [after crashing in the storm] Snarfer: Nope! No broken bones! Yep, I'm all in one piece... [starts shivering] I am cold though! Wily-Kat: We're going to be worse than 'cold' if we don't find some kind of shelter, fast! Wily-Kit: Over there! See? It's a cave1 Lynx-O (over radio): Tower to Hover-Cat! Tower to Hover-Cat! Come on, please. Lion-O: Lion-O, here. Lynx-O: I've lost contact with Snarfer and the Thunder-Kittens. I'm afraid they're lost in the storm too! Lion-O: I'll swing south and try to find them. Lynx-O: All right. Be careful, Lion-O; I have a feeling this is more than just a freak storm... [after being dethawed] Hachiman: I had no idea that strange little creature was the leader of the Lunataks! Wily-Kit: Yes. And Luna wouldn't go to all that trouble to steal your sword unless she intends to use it herself somehow! Wily-Kat: You're right! We'll take Hachiman back to the Tower and alert Lion-O right away! Hachiman: No! I must go after these Lunataks now! Wily-Kat: But Hachiman, you'll walk right into another one of Luna's traps! Hachiman: It makes no difference! The Lunataks did more than steal the Thunder-Cutter; they stole my honor! I will not rest until I have both my sword and my honor back! [Hachiman runs off] Wily-Kit: Talk about stubborn! Wily-Kat: You better find a way to signal Lion-O! Snarfer and I will go after Hachiman; we have to help him... somehow! Snarfer: Right you are! Yep! Let's go! Hachiman: An evil-looking place if ever there was one. Snarfer: 'Evil-looking' is right. Yessir, they call it the Valley of Chains! Hachiman: The Valley of Chains... what do you know of it? Snarfer: Not much. Only that an ancient wizard placed a curse on the Valley, and no one's ever returned from it! Wily-Kat: Never returned from it? Hachiman: The Lunataks traveled through this Valley, and if they can do it, so can Hachiman! Snarfer: You did it, Lion-O! You beat the Valley of Chains! [Lightning flashes; Luna's face appears in the sky] Luna: I knew the ancient evil of this Valley would be no match for your skills, Lord Lion-O! However, let me introduce you to a new evil; your last opponent, your final fling! [the Thunder-Cutter appears] Hachiman: My sword! The Thunder-Cutter! Snarfer: Here it comes! [the automaton appears, carrying the Thunder-Cutter] Luna: Meet Automaton, Lion-O, the ultimate warrior! We built him just for you! He is not troubled by such petty distinctions as good or evil! He exists only to obey... and destroy! Right,

Automaton? Automaton: Yes, master! Haah! Wily-Kat: I don't understand! How can your sword be used against Lion-O? Hachiman: Since the warrior who bears it is only a machine, and is neither good nor evil, then the Thunder-Cutter cannot distinguish between right and wrong. It can only fight... [while watching the Automaton fight Lion-O] Wily-Kat: Lords of Thundera, look how strong that thing is! Luna: What? How can this be? The samurai destroyed the Automaton! Alluro: Yes, Luna! Another of your foolish schemes up in smoke. I say it's time we Lunataks have a new leader. Tugmug: Alluro is right. Luna has let our enemies make fools of us again! We need a new leader! Now! [Amok rises] Luna: Remember this, you fools, and remember it well: I will command, and you will obey! And right now, I command you to get SkyTomb under way! We can still capture the Thundercats if we hurry! Lion-O: Thanks, Hachiman. I don't know how you did it, but thank you! Wily-Kit: Yes. How did you destroy that thing? Hachiman: Once my hand touched the sword, it understood the machine's true purpose was evil. And when the Thunder-Cutter turned against it, it was the end of the Automaton! [after the Lunataks cornering them in the cave] Luna: So, puny cats, do you really think you can fight all of us? Wouldn't you rather surrender? Lion-O: We're not going to fight, but we won't surrender either. Luna: Then what are you going to do? Hachiman: This! [Lion-O and Hachiman start an avalanche] [after being buried by snow] Luna: Quickly, you fools! Back to the cave! We can still beat those Thundercats! Alluro: Luna, you've got to be kidding! [pushes Luna's head into the snow] "Hair of the Dog" Panthro: That's the last one! Looks like we're about ready for takeoff. Lion-O: Okay, Panthro, you'd better get going. Take care; you're going to be tackling some of the most dangerous criminals in the galaxy. Snarf: By everyone, and look after yourselves! [the Thundercats take off in the Feliner] Snarf: I sure hope the others don't have to stay away too long. It's going to be lonely here without them! Lion-O: Never mind 'lonely', Snarf; it could be dangerous! With only the two of us here, we're going to have keep our wits about us. Snarf: We'll need to keep up our strength, too! And I know just the thing for that! [outside, skipping] 'I'm off to gather candy-fruit, all juicy fresh and sweet; it's such a fine and dandy fruit, the one we love to eat!' Mumm-Ra: Excellent, Ma-Mutt! The cats are away, so we shall play! I have a plan, a way for us to break into Cats' Lair and, without the protection of blasted Thunderian technology, the Thundercats will be powerless to resist Mumm-Ra, the Ever-Living! Go, my horrible hound! Bring that miserable Snarf creature to me!

Mumm-Ra: Fine work, my beautiful pet! Snarf: Just wait'll I-Mumm-Ra: Silence! [knocks Snarf out with a lightning bolt] Now, you will take on the bodily form of this Snarf creature so you can gain access to Cats' Lair. I shall not be far behind! I will disable Cats' Lair, and with neither friends nor the power of the Lair to help him, I will challenge the Lord of the Thundercats fist to fist! I will trample all over him! (chanting) Ancient spirits of evil, let your mighty powers descend on these two creatures, so that they may exchange their bodily forms! Let Snarf become Ma-Mutt, and Ma-Mutt become Snarf! [they change shape] Perfect! No one would know the difference! Now, all we have to do is fill the basket with poison catnip, and we're ready for the next stage! Be gone, Ma-Mutt, to Cats' Lair! Ma-Mutt (as Snarf): Cat's Lair! [Ma-Mutt enters Cats' Lair disguised as Lion-O] Lion-O: Hey, Snarf, you've been gone for hours! What kept you? Ma-Mutt: Ate too much candy fruit! Feel ill! Lion-O: You feel ill? Is that why your voice sounds so funny? Ma-Mutt: Yeah! Yeah! Voice gone funny! Lion-O: Well, that's bad news, Snarf. Better rest up a while. Ma-Mutt: Yeah! Yeah! Take candy fruit! Lion-O: Not right now. Maybe later... Ma-Mutt: Take candy fruit! Lion-O: What? Ma-Mutt: 'Later' not good. Fruit not fresh. Better now. Lion-O: Well, okay, if you insist... [Lion-O takes a bite] Lion-O: Something strange about this fruit. It tastes...bitter. (groggily) Funny, I-I feel... faint. I knew something was wrong. You're not Snarf. You're-- [collapses] Ma-Mutt: Ma-Mutt! Lion-O (to Ma-Mutt): What have you done with Snarf? [Mumm-Ra appears] Mumm-Ra: Pick on someone your own size, Thundercat! [blasts Lion-O] Without your friends, you are a pathetic opponent, Lion-O! Drag him away and lock him up, Ma-Mutt, while I think of a suitably humiliating way to destroy the Lord of the Thundercats! [on the Tower of Omens viewscreen] Snarfer: Am I glad to see you, Uncle! I had this weird dream, that you'd been turned into a dog! But I guess you're okay, huh, you're okay, huh? Ma-Mutt: Everything good! No problem! Snarfer: Your voice sure sounds funny. Did you catch a cold? Ma-Mutt: Yeah! Yeah! Snarf gotta go now! [turns off the viewscreen] Pumyra: Well, he looks okay to me. Snarfer: He sure didn't sound okay. Something's wrong! Bengali: Snarfer's right! Maybe we should check it out! Snarfer: All right! Let's go! [seeing the Thunder-Strike] Mumm-Ra: So, the upstart Thundercats are poking their noses in? Well, we'll singe their whiskers! [watching Ma-Mutt chase Snarfer] Mumm-Ra: Ma-Mutt is giving the Thundercat creature a run for his money. Lion-O: And now you're going to get a run for your money, Mumm-Ra! Mumm-Ra: I should have destroyed you when you were at my mercy! But it's not too late! [blasts Lion-O]

Mumm-Ra: Surrender, Thundercat! Lion-O: Thundercats never surrender! [Mumm-Ra knocks Lion-O down] Mumm-Ra: It's over, Thundercat! This time you are finished! [the Thundercat signal appears in the Black Pyramid] Snarf (as Ma-Mutt): The Thundercat signal! Lion-O must be in trouble! I have to get out of here somehow! [struggles and fails to escape] There's just one chance! If I could only remember the words Mumm-Ra used... Evil spirits of... no, ancient evil of spirits... hey, I got it! (chanting) Ancient spirits of evil, transformed this canine form to... Snarf-Ra, the Ever-Living! [Snarf becomes a giant creature] Mumm-Ra: At last! The moment when you must yield to Mumm-Ra, the Ever-Living! Snarf-Ra: Not so fast, Mumm-Ra! First you've got to deal with Snarf-Ra, the Ever-Living! Mumm-Ra: Aah! How dare you, Thundercat creature! [blasts Snarf-Ra] "Vultureman's Revenge" Vultureman: Today will be the turning point in the history of Third Earth! And this, the Thundrainium Projector, will prove once and for all that I, Vultureman, am the true Mutant leader! I will drive the Thundercats from their homes and Mumm-Ra will be so grateful that he will reward me for all eternity! But first, a trial run... [fires the Thundrainium Projector into the air] Perfect! A ray of pure Thundrainium, the one substance which reduces the Thundercats to puny kittens! And, a precision aiming device, so that I can hit a single target or saturate an entire area! Who needs a team of Mutants when Vultureman swings into action? [after flying into the Thundrainium cloud] Wily-Kat: Kit, are you okay? Wily-Kit: Yeah... I think so... Wily-Kat: What is that stuff? Wily-Kit: I don't know, but I feel so weak... Wily-Kat, do you think it might be Thundrainium? Wily-Kat: I think we better find out! Slithe: Our weapons are a mess! Jackalman: I thought you ordered Vultureman to fix them, Slithe! Slithe: I certainly did! Find him at once, and tell him they'd better in perfect order by tomorrow or I'll wring his scrawny neck, yes! [after the Thunder-Kittens the Thundrainium Projector] Vultureman: You've broken my masterpiece! I'll get even with you for this, Thunder-Kittens! No one messes with Vultureman! [Snarf is dusting] Snarf: If it wasn't for old Snarf, Lion-O wouldn't be able to see the Eye of Thundera through the dust in here! [The Eye of Thundera opens] Lion-O! There's trouble! Come quick! Lion-O: Quick, Snarf, give me the Sword. Sword of Omens, give me sight beyond sight! [sees a vision] The Thunder-Kittens are in danger! They're heading right into the Field of Daggers. They look exhausted; they won't be able to hang on much longer. There's no time to lose; we have to get after them! Come on, Snarf! Slithe: Get a move on, Vultureman! You're taking all day! Vultureman: I'm working as fast as I can! What's the hurry, anyway? Slithe: We're running low on munchies! I'm going to steal some snacks from those pathetic Wolos, and tomorrow, we'll take their entire harvest, yes? Vultureman: There you are, Slithe. A-OK for takeoff!

[Slithe climbs into his Nose-Diver] Vultureman: Try to bring it back in one piece this time! Slithe: Don't you worry about me, buzzard! Just check out the Sky-Cutters, yes? We'll need them tomorrow! [Slithe flies away] Vultureman: If Slithe's going to boss some Wolos around, you can bet that Lion-O will ride into the rescue! And I will be waiting for him, with the Thundrainium Projector! I'll take care of Slithe and Lion-O together! 'Two birds with one stone'! [pause] I hate that expression! Vultureman: Plun-Darr to Skytomb! Come in! [Chilla appears on the viewscreen] Chilla: What do you want, Mutant! Vultureman: The Thundrainium Projector worked exactly as planned! Tomorrow, there will be a perfect opportunity to defeat Lion-O! But... I need more Thundrainium. Chilla: Very well! I will meet you one hour before sunrise. Do not be late! [later] Vultureman: Just like Chilla to threaten me not to be late, then keep me waiting! [Chilla arrives] Chilla: A primitive design but it should be effective enough... Vultureman: How dare you insult my precious Thundrainium Projector? This is the weapon that will deliver Third Earth into the hands of the forces of evil! Now, where's my Thundrainium? Chilla: Mind your beak, insolent turkey! [blasts ice at Vultureman] You risk a cold sleep... [blasts fire at Vultureman] ...or being steamed like an oyster! Now fetch the Thundrainium from the IceRunner and be quick about it! Snarf: Where are they, Lion-O? [sees a space board near a chasm] Uh-oh, I sure hope they didn't fall down there! Lion-O: We'll check it out anywhere, Snarf. [they fly down the chasm] Lion-O: You look down there, Snarf. And be careful; I sense something evil about this place. Snarf: If you feel that way, maybe I should go along to protect you! [after finding the Wolo village frozen] Wily-Kat: No natural storm would do that! This looks like the work of Mutants! Oh, I'd like to get my hands on them! Slithe: We would be happy to arrange that, yes? Seize them! [the Mutants attack the Thunder-Kittens and the Wolo] Slithe: I would prefer a more permanent way to deal with meddlesome imps! Chilla: Your preference is of no concern, Mutant. I need live bait for my trap! Make sure you're ready, Vultureman! Vultureman: Oh, yes. I'm ready, Chilla! I've been ready a long time for this... Chilla: Lower your Sword, Thundercat, or I'll frost your precious Thunder-Kittens! Lion-O: If I give in, you'll do it anyway! Ho! [Lion-O blasts her] [Bengali smashes the Thundrainium Projector with his hammer] Bengali: Time you took a hammering, Vultureman! Lion-O: You got caught in the crossfire between the Thundercats and the Mutants. I'm sorry. Wolo: You have nothing to apologize for, Lion-O. The Thundercats have come to our help many times. We are always happy to see you... even under circumstances like these! Wily-Kat: I can't believe that Chilla and Vultureman would ruin an entire harvest just to try to get us. Wily-Kit: There must be something we can do for these Wolos, Lion-O.

Bengali: Perhaps Panthro could come up with something... Lion-O: Well, he could try, but it doesn't seem likely. [Jaga appears] Jaga: This is not a task for technology, Lion-O. Lion-O: Jaga! Jaga: This is a task for ancient powers. Ancient magical powers, Lion-O. Lion-O: Magical powers... the Sword! The Sword of Omens! [Lion-O raises the Sword of Omens] Lion-O (echoing): Ho! [the ice melts] Wily-Kat: The ice has melted! Bengali: The Wolos' crops are saved! Lion-O: Thanks to Jaga! Wolo: Please pass him my people's humble thanks. Lion-O: I'll pass on your thanks, old friend. You can be sure of that! "ThunderCubs Part I" Mumm-Ra: Ma-Mutt, come join me for a history lesson! Let us examine the past: a time before those wretched Thundercats came to Third Earth! A time before the destruction of Thundera, when Jaga was at his prime, and the miserable Lion-O was just a cub! [flashback to war on Thundera] Ratilla: It is mine! At last, I have found it -- the Treasure of Thundera! This casket contains the Thundercats' every secret! Now I, Ratilla the Terrible, will rule Thundera! [the Sword of Plun-Darr flashes] Ratilla: The flames of the Sword of Plun-Darr warn me of danger! [Jaga approaches] Jaga! Jaga: Lay down your sword, Ratilla! The Treasure of Thundera cannot be yours! Ratilla: Never! [they fight] [after Jaga beats Ratilla] Ratilla: You better finish you now, Jaga! Because if you don't, I will surely return to destroy you and all Thundera! I will have my revenge! Jaga: The Code of Thundera does not permit me to 'finish you', Ratilla. You will spend the rest of your days in exile, and as for the Sword of Thundera, you will never see it again. I will seal it in the rocks of the deepest canyons of Thundera; not even the Sword of Plun-Darr will escape a tomb of molten rock! Mumm-Ra: So, for many years, Ma-Mutt, the Sword of Plun-Darr remained trapped deep in the molten core of Planet Thundera. But its powers could not be subdued! Look! Yes, Ma-Mutt -- it was the Sword of Plun-Darr that caused the calamity which brought those despicable Thundercats to Third Earth! For, as it fought to escape its stone tomb, the Sword destroyed Thundera! We must salvage the Sword of Plun-Darr, Ma-Mutt! We must find the Treasure of Thundera for then we will possess the secrets of the Thundercats, and we will have the power to remove them from Third Earth forever! Come, Ma-Mutt -- we will travel through time and space. We will explore the debris of Thundera! We will find that treasure and we will retrieve the Sword of Plun-Darr! Lion-O: What is it, Lynx-O? Lynx-O: I don't know, Lion-O, but something strange is happening in deep space! Snarfer: Gee, Lynx-O, there's always something strange happening in deep space! Lynx-O: This is no laughing matter, Snarfer. The signals are coming from Thundera! Lion-O: Thundera? Our home planet? But it was totally destroyed; how could any signals come from Thundera?

Lynx-O: I just don't know, Lion-O, but it's almost as... as though parts of the planet were reforming! Lion-O: Let's get a second opinion; I'll call Panthro! Panthro: Those light clusters are the remaining fragments of Thundera. This shows that the fragments are concentrating in one area. Tygra: It sounds impossible, but it's almost as though Thundera is reforming! Lion-O: That's exactly what Lynx-O said! Wily-Kat: Boy, that Lynx-O may be blind, but he sure is smart! Wily-Kit: Why shouldn't he be smart, just because he's blind? Wily-Kat: Hey... I didn't mean it like that! Wily-Kit: Maybe you should be more careful what you say, Wily-Kat! Cheetara: Is it possible that anyone on Thundera might have survived when the planet exploded? I mean, some of those fragments are pretty big, and if the planet is reforming, maybe there are some Thunderians up there who need our help! Panthro: The situation's worse than that, Cheetara. Watch! [activates the holo-jector] Lion-O: A pyramid! Tygra: Just like Mumm-Ra's! Cheetara: It can't be! Pumyra: Well... if Mumm-Ra's up there, he can't be down here, right? Lion-O: Right. Panthro, you and I will check out Mumm-Ra's Pyramid, find out if he really has gone. Tygra, you and Snarf keep monitoring Thundera. We'll figure this out somehow. Thundercats... ho! [in the Black Pyramid] Lion-O: The Sarcophagus is empty! He's not here! [Mumm-Ra laughs] Mumm-Ra (offscreen): Maybe I am here, maybe I'm not, Thundercats! Panthro: We're coming for you, Mumm-Ra, you worthless bundle of bones! [takes off] Lion-O: Panthro, wait! Mumm-Ra: So good of you to visit me, Panthro. We don't see enough of each other... [Mumm-Ra vanishes behind a wall] Panthro: You won't get away that easily, you miserable mummy! [blasts the wall away] Lion-O: No, don't do it! [Panthro yells in the distance] [after escaping from Mumm-Ra's water trap] Lion-O: Well, that was too close for comfort! Panthro: I owe you, Lion-O... and I owe you all an apology! I got us into that mess; I took off after Mumm-Ra like a terrier after a rat: impulsively, without thinking! I guess I just lost my temper. Lion-O: Forget it, Panthro! Snarf: We all do it sometimes, even us Snarfs! Bengali: I don't think it was Mumm-Ra you chased. I'd bet a Thunderian fortune that this place is empty! Tygra: He must have left some kind of spell, an image of himself! Cheetara: Like a hologram! If he's not here... Lion-O: He's on Thundera! Panthro: But why? [Jaga appears] Jaga: He's searching for the secrets of the Thundercats, Lion-O! Lion-O: Jaga! Jaga: You must stop him before he finds the Treasure of Thundera, Lion-O, before he can use the Sword of Plun-Darr! Lion-O: Treasure? What treasure? And what is the Sword of Plun-Darr?

Jaga: Stop him, Lion-O, or he will destroy the Thundercats! [Jaga vanishes] Snarf: Lion-O, Lynx-O, look! Lion-O: What is it, Snarf? Snarf: Snarfer, transfer the image to the monitors! [an image of Snarfs being marched in chains appears on the screen] Snarfer: That's the Valley of Despair! It survived! Snarf: And Ma-Mutt's treating the Snarfs like slaves! We have to do something, Lion-O! Those Snarfs are family! Snarfer: If I ever get my hands on that Mumm-Ra, I'd-Snarf: Don't you worry, Snarfs! I'm coming! This Snarf'll save you, you can count on that! Panthro: Think we can design a booster rocket for the Feliner with enough thrust to reach Thundera? Tygra: I'll have to look at the figures, but I believe I could do it... Panthro: And whatever you can design, I can build! Vultureman: The Thundercats have deserted the Tower of Omens! Jackalman: Slithe will want to know what they're up to... Vultureman: Slithe? That rotten reptilian has had his day! Luna will pay well for this information! Jackalman: Luna? You're going to side with the Lunataks? Vultureman: You bet, scavenger, I'm sick of always being on the losing side! Jackalman: You're a traitor, Vultureman! A traitor to Mutant-kind! Vultureman: 'Mutant-kind' has never done anything for me! From now on, I'm going to take care of myself! [later] Luna: This better be good, Vultureman! Vultureman: Oh, it is! How would you like to take deliver of the Tower of Omens? Luna: Spill it, bird! Don't speak in riddles! Vultureman: The Thundercats have left Lynx-O and the Thunder-Kittens at the Tower... alone! You'll never have a better chance to take it! Luna: This one's yours, Tugmug. And don't mess it up! Tugmug: You got it, Luna. I'll take Redeye with me. Vultureman: Just the two of you? Luna: If Tugmug and Redeye can't deal with two kids and a blind old geezer, they shouldn't be called Lunataks! Vultureman: They're not just kids, they're Thunder-kids! Luna: Enough, featherhead! Do it, Tugmug, and do it now! [after Snarf shocks himself on a wire] Snarf: You sure you know what you're doing, young fella? Snarfer: Of course I do, Uncle Osbert--er, Snarf! I took Advanced Electronics at Snarf College! Snarf: I suppose shocking your elders was part of the course! Lynx-O: All the Braille-board's powers are focused on Thundera. We are extremely vulnerable, Thunder-Kittens. Wily-Kat: Relax, Lynx-O! We're here; there's nothing to worry about. Everything will be okay. Lynx-O: I keep getting strange vibrations... Wily-Kit: I'll go and take another walk around, see if anything's ha--aaah! [the Lunataks burst in] Lion-O: Tugmug's inside the Tower of Omens! Cheetara, Pumyra, Snarf -- let's go! Tygra: If Lynx-O and the Thunder-Kittens are in trouble, you're not leaving without us! Lion-O: No, Tygra; you specialists have to keep working on the booster. We need to get up to Thundera fast! We'll take care of the Lunataks!

"ThunderCubs Part II" [after beating the Lunataks] Pumyra: Time for you to pack your bags and travel, Lunataks! Lion-O: Next time, we may not be so easy going... Vultureman: I told you, it would take more than these two incompetents to deal with Lynx-O and the Thunder-Kittens! You should have sent all the Lunataks, but no, you always know best! Luna: Silence, insolent Mutant! I don't have to listen to you! Vultureman: It's a shame you didn't listen to me, because if you had, the Thundercats would be our prisoners by now and we'd own the Tower of Omens! Luna: Enough, Vultureman! Vultureman: When I'm done telling you-Luna: I warned you! Throw him out, Amok! [the Thundercats are watching the Braille-board's recording] Wily-Kit: This is the new Thundera. You can see that it's almost completely reformed! That's the good news. Wily-Kat: The bad news is that the new Thundera is directly under the influence of these moons -- the Moons of Plun-Darr! Snarf: The Moons of Plun-Darr? That's where those horrible Lunataks come from! Wily-Kit: It gets worse! Look! [the image of the Snarfs appear in chains] Snarfer: hey! What's going on? What's wrong with those Snarfs? Wily-Kat: They're working in a part of Thundera we call 'the Mountains of the Moon'. Wily-Kit: It's under the influence of the First Moon of Plun-Darr! Wily-Kat: Where Tugmug comes from! Tygra: The First Moon of Plun-Darr has a super-strong gravitational pull. That's why Tugmug has such extraordinary abilities down here on Third Earth, where there's normal gravity. Panthro: You mean that area of Thundera, the Mountains of the Moon, is an area of increased gravitational pull? Lynx-O: I'm afraid so. If we're going to be able to move around there freely, we'll have to develop some kind of... anti-gravity equipment. Wily-Kit: That's not all! Take a look at this! Snarfer: Now what's happening? Snarf: I can't bear this! Lion-O, do something! We have to help them -- they're our people! Lion-O: We're moving as fast as possible, Snarf, doing everything we can. Wily-Kat: Those Snarfs are working under an area that we call 'the Caverns of Cold'. Wily-Kit: That's under the influence of the Second Moon of Plun-Darr, where Chilla comes from. Lynx-O: We'll have to design some way of keeping warm in those Caverns of Cold. Some kind of... thermal suits! Snarfer: Thermal Thunder-wear! Snarf: This is no time for childish jokes, Snarfer! Snarfer: Sorry, Uncle! Lynx-O: One other thing. Look! Cheetara: But there's nothing there! Lynx-O: Exactly -- the Jungles of Darkness. Wily-Kit: The Jungles of Darkness are under the influence of the moon which Redeye comes from! Wily-Kat: And anyone entering this area might as well be blind! Lynx-O: Of course, that wouldn't make much difference to me, but the rest of you-Tygra: We'll need some kind of night-vision system. Infrared, perhaps! Panthro: Night vision systems, anti-gravity units, thermal suits... seems to me that if we're going to survive on that new Thundera, we've got out work cut out, Tygra! Tygra: I'll start putting some ideas together, right away!

[after eavesdropping] Vultureman: So, Mumm-Ra's on Thundera and the Thundercats are going to pay him a surprise visit! If I could throw a wrench in their works, Mumm-Ra would owe me a big one! There wouldn't be anything I couldn't ask him! So, Thundercats, I think it's time to prepare the Ratstar! Lion-O: This expedition to the new Thundera will be tough, but we have to go there, and we have to confront Mumm-Ra. Snarfer: You bet! Yessir, the Snarfs will be free! Lion-O: It's more than that, Snarfer. If Mumm-Ra gets his hands on the Treasure of Thundera, if he can seize the Sword of Plun-Darr, none of us will survive. But here's the toughest part: some of you will have to stay here. Lynx-O, you and Pumyra will man the Tower of Omens. Lynx-O: As you say, Lion-O. You are the Lord of the Thundercats. Lion-O: Bengali, you will take care of Cats' Lair. Bengali: I'd rather be fighting Mumm-Ra, but I understand, Lion-O. Lion-O: Wily-Kit, Wily-Kat-Wily-Kat: I don't think we're going to like this... Lion-O: You will be staying on Third Earth-Thunder-Kittens: Oh, Lion-O! Lion-O: More than that, you will be working separately. Kit, here at the Lair, Kat, with Lynx-O and Pumyra, at the Tower of Omens. Wily-Kat: But Lion-O, we always work together! Wily-Kat: We've never been apart! Lion-O: We've never faced a danger like this before, either. If we're going to pull through, you have to play your part. You are Thundercats; we need you more than ever! Wily-Kit: ...we understand, Lion-O. [after the Ratstar takes off] Vultureman: A maana, Mutants! A well-planned ambush in space, and soon it will be adios, Thundercats! Vultureman and Mumm-Ra will be all-powerful, and Third Earth and the New Thundera will be ours! Vultureman: Nothing can stop me now! I'm the smartest Mutant in the business! [Slithe appears behind Vultureman] Slithe: Not quite, Vultureman! Vultureman: Aah, Slithe! What are you doing here? Slithe: Protecting my interests! And you owe me an explanation! Start talking, yes? [after the Thundercats have been petrified by the Ratstar's Varicannon] Snarf: The Sword! The Sword of Omens! Lion-O, we need you! The Thundercats need you! Wake up, please, wake up! [Snarf puts the Sword of Omens into Lion-O's hand] Lion-O (slowly): Snarf. Can't move. Seem to be... locked in place... Snarf: Try, Lion-O! Use the Sword of Omens! Try! You're our only hope; we have to get to Thundera or it'll be the end of the Thundercats! Lion-O (slowly): I can't... give in... Sword... of Omens... [The Sword flashes, Lion-O is healed] Lion-O (slowly): Thunder.... Thunder.... (normally) Thundercats... ho! Lynx-O (over the radio): Tower, calling Feliner! Stand by to receive an urgent telecast! Panthro: Go ahead, Lynx-O! Lynx-O: We've picked up a high level of induced volcanic activity on Thundera. We have every reason to believe that Mumm-Ra has located the Sword of Plun-Darr! "ThunderCubs Part III"

Mumm-Ra (chanting): All you ancient spirits of evil, help your servant Mumm-Ra in the hour of his need! Summon the mirthless might of the Sword of Plun-Darr and bestow those powers on your ever-living servant! [the Sword rises from the chasm] Mumm-Ra: It worked, Ma-Mutt! The ancients have bestowed the Sword of Plun-Darr upon us! O Sword of Plun-Darr, come to the hand that would wield your evil! [the Sword flies into Mumm-Ra's hand] Mumm-Ra: We have it, Ma-Mutt! We have the Sword of Plun-Darr! And when we find the Treasure of Thundera, the Thundercats will meet their doom! Oswald: More junk for you to sort through, Snarf Eggbert! Eggbert: If you ask me, Snarf Oswald, this hunt for the Treasure of Thundera is a complete waste of time! [they see a ring buried in the dirt] Eggbert: Wait a minute... [they clamor] Oswald: What do you suppose it is? Eggbert: Maybe it is part of the Treasure of Thundera! [Ma-Mutt runs in and grabs the ring] Mumm-Ra: I hope you have a good reason to wake me from my ancient sleep, Ma-Mutt! [Mumm-Ra sees a ring in Ma-Mutt's mouth] Mumm-Ra: What have we here? Aha! Can it be that we are nearing the Treasure of Thundera? I have heard that it contained valuable jewels as well as the key to the Thundercats' secrets! Make those miserable Snarfs work harder, Ma-Mutt! The Treasure of Thundera is the key to the fate of the Thundercats! [after they land] Snarfer: Well, what are we waiting for? Let's go free those Snarfs! Lion-O: Not so fast, Snarfer! Snarf: Mumm-Ra's terrorizing our families! We have to go free them! Lion-O: We will free your friends, Snarf. But that's not the only thing we have to accomplish here. Cheetara: Lion-O's right, Snarf. The Treasure of Thundera and the Sword of Plun-Darr must be our first priority. Snarf: More important than us Snarfs? Panthro: No. Nothing is more important than freeing the Snarfs... Tygra: ...but, if we rush headlong in there and free the Snarfs without finding the Treasure or the Sword first... Cheetara: ...Mumm-Ra will know we're here, and if he finds the Treasure first... Panthro: ...he'll know how to defeat us for once and for all. Lion-O: Thundercats and Snarfs will be slaves forever. All our efforts will come to nothing. Snarfer: Well-Snarf: Easy, nephew; Lion-O's right! Snarfer: Uncle, what are you doing here? Snarf: We're going to go rescue the Snarfs! Snarfer: But... but you said Lion-O was right! Snarf: The Thundercats will do what the Thundercats think is right, and but a Snarf's got to do what a Snarf's got to do, and this Snarf is going to rescue his friends and family. Snarfer: Right on, Unc! Snarf: Come on. We'll take what we need from the Feliner and we'll get underway! [in the Feliner] Snarf: Here, Snarfer! Cat-Suits, full thermal protection! They'll keep us warm in the Caverns of Cold! Snarfer: Uncle, Spring-Heels! Anti-gravity systems for the Mountains of the Moon!

Snarf: Now all we need are the Cat's Eyes... Snarfer: ...to see in the Jungles of Darkness! Snarf: It's dark out there! We could wear them now! Snarfer: Good thinking, Unc! [Snarfer puts them on] Snarfer: Hey, these things really work! Snarf: Of course they do! Come on, let's get going! [after sneaking into the Snarf slave camp] Snarfer: Over there, Uncle! Look! Snarf: Cousin Eggbert and Oswald! [Snarf throws a rock] Snarfer: Uncle Oswald! Eggbert! Over here! Oswald, Eggbert: Snarf! [they run over and hug; Ma-Mutt sees them] [Mumm-Ra sees Snarf and Snarfer] Mumm-Ra: Snarf and Snarfer? What in the name of all the ancients are they doing here? Can this mean that the Thundercats themselves are here? Well, there's only one way to find out, MaMutt: we'll capture those sniveling Snarfs and interrogate them! (chanting) Ancient spirits of evil, transform this decayed form to Mumm-Ra, the Ever-Living! Come, Ma-Mutt. we will teach them such a lesson! We will squeeze those Thundercat lackeys until their hips squeak, and they will tell us if their masters have found our Thunderian paradise! [after Oswald escapes] Mumm-Ra: Wait, Ma-Mutt! I have an idea! Let him go. If he escapes, that pathetic furball may well find the Thundercats, and if he does, he will surely bring them here! Then, my loathesome loyal pooch, what better way to locate the Treasure of Thundera than by using the Sword of Omens' Sight Beyond Sight? Snarf: You'll never be able to persuade Lion-O to use the Sword of Omens to help you! Mumm-Ra: I may not, but Snarfer will! Bring them to the pyramid, Ma-Mutt! Mumm-Ra (chanting): Ancient spirits of evil, grant me, Mumm-Ra, your venomous bootlicker, the disguise of Snarfer! [Mumm-Ra changes his form to Snarfer's] Mumm-Ra (as Snarfer): Take them away, Ma-Mutt! Yep, lock them up in the sarcophagus! I will wait for the Thundercats! [after finding Mumm-Ra disguised as Snarfer] Panthro: Snarfer! Mumm-Ra (as Snarfer): Panthro! Good to see you! Yup! Panthro: You blew the mission, Snarfer, you and Snarf! And what's worse, Snarf deceived me. He conned me into letting him take guard duty so that you and he could come here. You may have had the best intentions, but you gave away our hand to that fiend, Mumm-Ra! Mumm-Ra: Gee, Panthro, uh-Cheetara: Easy, Panthro. They meant well... Panthro: Good intentions aren't enough! You shouldn't have done it! Cheetara: Where is Snarf, anyway? What happened here? Mumm-Ra: When Mumm-Ra realized the Thundercats were here on Thundera, he high-tailed it with Snarf, and all the Snarf slaves. I managed to escape! Lion-O: Has he found the Treasure of Thundera yet? Mumm-Ra: No sir, not yet! But we Snarfs all know is that it's buried somewhere in the ruins surrounding the pyramid! And I know how you can locate the Treasure! Lion-O: How's that? Mumm-Ra: With the Sword of Omens' Sight Beyond Sight!

[after Lion-O detects the Treasure of Thundera] Lion-O: From what I could see, the Treasure of Thundera is buried where those two walls meet. Mumm-Ra (as Snarfer): Well, what are you waiting for, Thundercats? Dig! [The Thundercats snarl] Mumm-Ra: Sorry, Thundercats! I must be getting over-excited. Yup, that's it. Sorry. Lion-O: Stand back. Ho! [Lion-O uncovers the Treasure; Mumm-Ra/Snarfer runs over to it] Mumm-Ra: At last! My dream's come true! The Treasure is mine! All mine! Panthro: Snarfer, what's got into you? [the Eye of Thundera growls] Lion-O: The Sword of Omens is warning us! Cheetara: That's not Snarfer... Mumm-Ra: No, Thundercats! Not Snarfer, but... [Mumm-Ra takes on his true form] Mumm-Ra! And now that I possess the Treasure of Thundera, your days are over! "ThunderCubs Part IV" Mumm-Ra: It's not over yet, Thundercats. I may have lost the Treasure of Thundera, but this is the Book of Omens! It contains the key to your Thundercat powers, and when I have deciphered this book, your days are done! Lion-O: This expedition to Thundera has been a disaster. Snarf: It's my fault, Lion-O. Snarfer and I should never have run off on our own like we did. Lion-O: That's true, but I can understand why you did it. No, the real problem is that I made all the wrong decisions. Maybe I shouldn't be Lord of the Thundercats any more... [Jaga appears] Jaga: You can't expect everything you do to be an instant success, Lion-O. Lion-O: Jaga! Jaga: The Thundercats need you more than ever. Lion-O: But I've made so many mistakes-Jaga: Stick to it, Lion-O; find the Book of Omens, salvage what you can of the Treasure of Thundera. [Jaga disappears] Lion-O: By Thundera, Snarf! Jaga's right! Let's get to work! At least it's just Mumm-Ra and us up here -- no Lunataks! Snarf: And no Mutants! [aboard the Ratstar] Vultureman: I'm the commander of this ship, Slithe! Slithe: Back off, Vultureman! I'm taking the Ratstar in! Vultureman: We're diving too steeply, Slithe! Pull up! Slithe: I know what I'm doing, Vultureman! [the controls explode] Vultureman: I'd hate to be with you when you don't! [the Ratstar crashes] Cheetara: Hey, look what I found! Panthro: What is it? Cheetara: Some kind of flute. Listen! [Cheetara plays the flute; the Snarfs are entranced] Cheetara: Snarf, Snarfer, what's the matter? Snarf, Snarfer (slowly): Nothing is the matter, o great Cheetara... Tygra: Nice try, Snarf, but we don't have much time for jokes. Panthro: They're not joking; that flute has some kind of power over them. Cheetara: Easy enough to find out for sure. [plays another tune]

Cheetara: Now... snap out of it! [the Snarfs are revived] Mumm-Ra (to the Mutants): One other thing! The new Thundera is a strange place, Mutants. There are mountains of super-gravity, where no ordinary creature can stand up! Caverns so cold that no one can survive there! Jungles so dark you might as well be blind! And... there are other, stranger places! Without my protections, you Mutants wouldn't last three minutes! (chanting) Ancient spirits of evil, protect these servants of madness. Give them the special powers they need to avoid the dangers of the new Thundera! [after spotting the Feliner] Slithe: Thundercats! How did they get onto us so quickly? Vultureman: Do something, Ma-Mutt! Call Mumm-Ra! Help us or it'll be over before it's started! [Ma-Mutt surrounds them in a ball of light and they fly towards the Caverns of Cold] [after the other Thundercats shrink to childhood size] Lion-O: The Thundercats have turned into children! What in the name of Jaga do I do now? Young Cheetara: Who... who are you? Lion-O: It's me, Cheetara. Lion-O! Young Cheetara: I don't know any 'Lion-O'. Do you? Young Panthro: Not me! Young Snarf: Aw c'mon, let's go play! [they run off] Lion-O: The Sword of Omens protected me, but what good is that? These Thunder-cubs don't know who I am! Mumm-Ra: You may have been prepared for the physical dangers of Thundera, Lion-O, but your friends had no defense against the Canyons of Youth! They have regressed to their childhood and there is no way back! [on Third Earth, the other Mutants and the Lunataks are outside the Cats' Lair] Jackalman: Bengali and Wily-Kit are alone in the Lair, and Lynx-O, Pumyra, and Wily-Kat are alone at the Tower! Monkian: There's no sign of the other Thundercats! Luna: You know the plan, Alluro! Get to it! Alluro: My pleasure, Luna! [Alluro throws his Psyche Club at the Cats' Eyes] [the Lunataks break into the Cats' Lair] Alluro: It's no use, Bengali. Your heroics are admirable, but there's really no point to them. All you have to do is give in to the inevitable... Luna: Finish them off, Tugmug! Tugmug: My pleasure, Luna! [he begins blasting Bengali and Wily-Kit] My gravity carbine will weigh you down, Thundercat! Chilla: Cats' Lair is ours, Luna. Luna: We haven't finished yet! Not until we take the Tower of Omens! Lion-O (thinking): The Sword of Omens protects the Thundercats. Only the Sword can help me now. (out loud) Sword of Omens, give the Thunder-cubs the understanding of Thundercats. Thunder! Thunder! Thundercats, ho! [the Sword of Omens' beam restores the Thundercats' minds] Young Cheetara: We'll do everything we can to help you, Lion-O! Lion-O: You must take the Feliner to Third Earth, find Skytomb, and free our friends. I must stay here and get the Book of Omens, or all will be lost. Young Snarf: We've never even been in that contraption, let alone know how to fly it!

Young Cheetara: We have to try, Snarf! I'm sure we can do it! Young Panthro: We just have to learn what to do! Young Cheetara: All set? Young Snarf: No, wait! I'm not going! Young Snarfer: But you have to! We can't leave you here! Young Cheetara: There's nothing to be afraid of, Snarf! Young Panthro: We know what we're doing... I hope! Young Snarf: It's not that. I'm not frightened... that is, I am, but that's not stopping me. I just know I have to stay with Lion-O. Don't ask me why! I just know it! Young Tygra: You can't stay, Snarf. Lion-O told us how we have to go to Third Earth. Young Snarf: I don't care! I'm not a Thundercat, I don't have to do what he says. I'm a Snarf, and I'm gonna stay! "ThunderCubs Part V" Mumm-Ra: If only I could decipher the Book of Omens, Ma-Mutt, all our troubles would be over! Ah! I can't make any sense of it! O ancient spirits of evil, grant me the strength to overthrow those meddlesome do-gooders, the Thundercats! Spirit: Mumm-Ra! Do you hear us, Mumm-Ra? Mumm-Ra: Aah! I--I do hear you! Who are you? Spirit: We are the ancient spirits of evil, and we have heard your plea. When the time comes, we will indeed give you the power to finish the Thundercats for all eternity! Mumm-Ra: Oh, you will never regret this! I will be your loyal slave and-Spirit: Cease groveling, Mumm-Ra! Now, go to your sarcophagus! Rest, and when you next encounter the wretched Lion-O, even you will be astonished at your power! [the Spirits vanish] Ro-Bear Belle: Where are you taking us? Chilla: Think of it as a 'mystery tour'! Redeye: But don't worry! We'll put you to good use. Ro-Bear Bill: Oh, where are you, Thundercats? If ever we needed you, we need you now! [at the Thundrillium mine] Snowman: Psst! Over here! Wily-Kit: It's the Snowman of Hook Mountain! Wily-Kat: Snowmeow! Boy, are we glad to see you! [Snowman raises an ice axe] Snowman: Let's cut you free from that. Hold out your wrists! Wily-Kit: I just hope you know what you're-[Snowman smashes their chains] Wily-Kit: ...doing! [later] Alluro: Luna will skin us alive if we tell her the Thunder-Kittens have escaped! Tugmug: So, who's going to tell her they escaped? We'll say they fell into a--a Thundrillium Pit! That's probably what happened anyway! The Thundrillium bunkers are filled, so let's get moving! [Skytomb takes off] [beneath the Black Pyramid] Lion-O: This leads to a cavern beneath the Pyramid, Snarf. Why don't you stay here? Snarf: I'm not afraid of any Egyptian relic! Mumm-Ra: 'Egyptian relic', eh? Well, we'll see about that... (chanting) Ancient spirits of evil, transform this decayed form, into Mumm-Ra, the Ever-Living!

[as the Feliner lands] Wily-Kit: Right on time! Wily-Kat: Boy, are those Lunataks in for a surprise when we turn up at Skytomb with a fullstrength Thundercat force! [the Thunder-cubs emerge from Feliner] Wily-Kit: Wha--wha... who? Wily-Kat: Panthro? Cheetara? Tygra? Snarfer? Wily-Kit: What happened? Wily-Kat: And where's Lion-O? Young Cheetara: You obviously know us, but who are you? Wily-Kit: I'm Wily-Kit, and this is my brother Wily-Kat. This is all too weird! You better do some explaining! Young Cheetara: Well, let's start with Lion-O: he stayed on Thundera to find the Book of Omens. He sent us to help you free your--our friends. Wily-Kit: The Lunataks have Lynx-O, Bengali, and Pumyra imprisoned in Skytomb. Young Panthro: And where is Skytomb? Wily-Kat: Deep in Dark Side, behind the Forest of Mists. That's going to be our first problem -getting through the Forest. [Cheetara moans] Young Tygra: Cheetara, what's the matter? Young Cheetara: I don't know. For a moment, I...I saw Lion-O in some kind of danger. Like... a daydream... [after seeing a vision] Lion-O: The Thunder-cubs are trying to fly through the Forest of Mists! They're going to crash! They'll be destroyed! Mumm-Ra: And I'll destroyed you! Lion-O: Mumm-Ra! Mumm-Ra: Yes! A Mumm-Ra you have never encountered before, Thundercat! [raises the Sword of Plun-Darr] Mumm-Ra: So, Thundercat, you have finally met your doom! [throws the Sword of Plun-Darr at Lion-O, who dodges; the Sword hits a statue, destroying it] Mumm-Ra: No, no, no! What have I done? [the Black Pyramid begins to crumble around him] Lion-O: Let's go Snarf! Snarf: Lion-O, wait! We have to save Ma-Mutt! Lion-O: What? Snarf: I mesmerized him with the magic flute. He's helpless! I'm responsible; I just can't leave him there! Lion-O: Okay, I can't argue with that... Lion-O: We have to get back to Third Earth, Snarf. Snarf: But how, Lion-O? We're marooned up here! Lion-O: Wait a minute, how did Mumm-Ra get here? Snarf: Ma-Mutt came with Mumm-Ra; he'd know. Play the flute, Lion-O, and wake me when it's over! [Lion-O plays the flute] Lion-O: How did you get here, Ma-Mutt? Show me how you got here! [Ma-Mutt runs off; Snarf and Lion-O follow] [outside SkyTomb] Luna: Welcome home, Thundercats! [Lion-O appears] Lion-O: Ho! [Lion-O blasts the Lunataks into the water]

Snarf: Quick, follow me! [they all run into the Black Pyramid] Lion-O: Take it away, Ma-Mutt! [the Black Pyramid teleports them away] Lion-O: Thunder-cubs, ho! [later] Lion-O: The Cave of Time is the only way the Thunder-cubs can return to their true Thundercat ages. Bengali: But what happens if they stay in there too long? Lynx-O: They'll end up older than me. "Totem of Dera" Mumm-Ra: Once again, you miserable Mutatns have failed to rid me of those accursed Thundercats! Vultureman: It's the Eye of Thundera, Mumm-Ra! It's too powerful! Mumm-Ra: Power? Power? I'll show you power! Spirit: Mumm-Ra! I have done your bidding, Mumm-Ra! I searched the new Thundera, seeking the Thundercats' treasure, and I have found the Totem of Dera! Mumm-Ra: The Totem of Dera! (chanting) Ancient spirits of evil, tell me of the Totem of Dera! How can I use it against the Thundercats? Spirit: We ancient spirits of evil have heard your plea, Mumm-Ra, and it pleases us to tell you that the Totem of Dera has legendary healing powers! Through the centuries, successive generations of Thundercats have used the Totem to overcome sickness and disease! Mumm-Ra: But how can I use healing power against the Thundercats? How? Spirit: The Totem's healing powers are so great that it can even bring inanimate objects to life. You, Mumm-Ra, can pervert its energies with your dark powers and, using the Totem, you can create minions, the likes of which the Thundercats have never dreamed possible! Mumm-Ra (to himself): Yes, but to use the Totem could prove dangerous... (to Vultureman) You there, Vultureman! Vultureman: Yes, Mumm-Ra? Mumm-Ra: This Totem... if you could instill your weapons with its power, surely you will have a force to equal that of the Eye of Thundera? Vultureman: Certainly, Mumm-Ra! I will destroy the Thundercats and prove we Mutants are worthy of your service! Mumm-Ra: Very well, Mutant. But do not dare fail me! [Mumm-Ra gives Vultureman the Totem] [Wily-Kit and Snarfer are sparring] Wily-Kit: Looking good, Snarfer! Now remember what I told you: always keep your eye on your opponent! Snarfer: Yes! [Snarfer charges, misses, and loses his balance] Snarfer: It's no use, Wily-Kit. I--I don't think I'll ever be a Thundercat. Nope... no sir... Lion-O: Just believe in yourself, Snarfer! Use the talent you have and you'll always find a way to do your part as a member of the team! [after Lion-O is poisoned, Jaga appears] Jaga: Lion-O, can you hear me? Lion-O? Lion-O (weakly): Jaga...? Snarfer: If only I was a real Thundercat, I'd know what to do right away! Yep, yessir! Jaga: You may not be able to see me, Snarfer, but concentrate. Hear my thoughts, and I will tell you what to do. Listen: the weapon Vultureman used, the Totem of Dera, the most magical and ancient of the Thundercat treasures... that is the only hope of saving Lion-O! Wily-Kit: Snarfer, what is it?

Snarfer: It's like someone is talking to me, telling me what to do... Wily-Kit! We have to find the Totem of Dera! We have to get it back from Vultureman! Wily-Kit: Totem of Dera? Vultureman? What are you talking about, Snarfer? Snarfer: It's the key to saving Lion-O! [Snarfer runs off] Wily-Kit: Snarfer, no! Don't leave us! I don't understand. What's gotten into Snarfer? Jaga: I've done all I can do, Lion-O. It's up to Snarfer now. [while they're wrestling with the Totem of Dera] Snarfer: You give that to me, Mutants, or else! Monkian: Give it up, Snarfer! Jackalman: Yeah, you don't have a chance! Snarfer: Nope! Thundercats never give up! No sirree! [the Totem comes off in Snarfer's hand] Vultureman: Don't just stand there, Mutants! Get after him! [after finding Wily-Kit] Vultureman: Well, well, an itty-bitty Thunder-kitty! Wily-Kit: Stand back, or... Vultureman: Or what, pipsqueak? [after Lion-O is revived] Lion-O: As usual, Mutants, you're very brave when it's three against one. But when the odds are even, you're just a bunch of cowards. Monkian: Are we going to let him talk to us like that? Vultureman: ...yes! [the Mutants run off] Mumm-Ra: I'll take that, thank you, Snarfer! [Mumm-Ra takes the Totem of Dera] Lion-O: Mumm-Ra! I might have known you were behind this! Mumm-Ra: You're finished, Lion-O! You will never withstand the combined power of the Totem of Dera and Mumm-Ra's magic! (chanting) Ancient powers of healing, hear me, and do my bidding! Bring me the Demon of the Swamp! [the Demon of the Swamp emerges from the water] Cheetara: The Thundercat signal! Panthro: That's with a capital T, for trouble! Tygra: Lion-O needs us! Let's go! [after the waterfall washes away the Swamp Demon] Cheetara: We did it! We stopped the Swamp Demon! Lion-O: Yes, but we lost the Totem of Dera... [Mumm-Ra emerges from the mud] Mumm-Ra: You'll pay for this... this indignity, Thundercats! You will rue the day you crossed swords with Mumm-Ra, the Ever-Living! [Mumm-Ra disappears] Panthro: That was a close call, Lion-O. Lion-O: Too close! Thank you, Snarfer; you saved us! Snarfer: Golly, yessir, I was just trying to be a Thundercat, Lion-O. All: Thundercats, ho! "The Chain of Loyalty" Tygra: This isn't getting us anywhere, Lion-O! (yawns) We're never going to decipher the Book of Omens!

Lion-O: We can't give up, Tygra. Tygra: Wait a minute, what's that? Lion-O: Those pictures, that's us -- the Thundercats! Panthro, Bengali, come and take a look at this. What do you make of it? Bengali: Some kind of ceremonial chain? Panthro: With pictures of the Thundercats on it? Snarf: Come and get it! Candyfruit pie, just like mama used to make! Bengali: Sounds good to me! Panthro: Then what are we waiting for? Tygra: Aren't you coming, Lion-O? Lion-O: I'll be with you in a while. There must be some way to figure this out... [Jaga appears] Jaga: You're looking at the Chain of Loyalty, Lion-O -- one of the most sacred pieces of the Treasure of Thundera. They say that once the Chain is broken, the Thundercats will begin to fight amongst themselves. Lion-O: But where is it, Jaga? How can I find it and protect it? Jaga: It remains on the new Thundera, Lion-O. You must go there and find it. Lion-O: Jaga, wait! Jaga: Find the Chain of Loyalty, before it falls into dangerous hands! But be careful; it is deceptively delicate... [after seeing the Feliner take off] Mumm-Ra: Aha, the Thundercats' infernal space-machine, and headed for the new Thundera, by the look of things! Come, my decrepit dog! Let us prepare to the Mumm-Raft! We must prevent them from salvaging even the smallest remnant of the Treasure of Thundera! But first, I must prepare myself! (chanting) Ancient spirits of evil, transform this decayed form to Mumm-Ra, the Ever-Living! [after the Feliner lands] Panthro: Hey, Eggbert! Tygra: Just the Snarf we need to see! Cheetara: You can help us find the Chain of Loyalty! Mumm-Ra (thinking): The Chain of Loyalty? Sounds like something I should know about! (out loud, as Snarf Eggbert) Just say the word! I'll do anything I can, Thundercats. Lion-O: This is what we're looking for, Eggbert. It's called the Chain of Loyalty. Cheetara: And it's vital to the continued existence of the Thundercats! Mumm-Ra: Hmm, I'll call a council meeting of all the Snarfs! We'll find that, ah, Chain thing for ya, never fear! Just leave it to good old Mumm--er, Eggbert! Lion-O: We'll split up. Panthro, you take the Caverns of Cold. Cheetara and Tygra, take the Jungles of Darkness. Thunder-Kittens, you and I will search the Mountains of the Moon. Eggbert, you join us at the Mountains of the Moon when you've spoken to all the other Snarfs! [while Mumm-Ra/Eggbert struggle with the Springheels] Wily-Kit: What's your problem, Eggbert? Wily-Kat: A little too much 'spring', and not enough 'heel', perhaps? [they laugh] Mumm-Ra (to himself): You laugh now, Thunder-Kittens, but I'll soon make you laugh on the other side of your faces! [after finding a can] Panthro: So, even on Thundera, people leave their litter all over the place. A very nasty habit! [while Tygra struggles to climb] Cheetara: You've been eating too much of Snarf's candyfruit pie! Lion-O: Is it up there, Eggbert?

Mumm-Ra: Oh, yes, Thundercat! It's up here, all right! It's up here... (changes back to MummRa)... and so am I! Thundercats: Mumm-Ra! Mumm-Ra: Yes! Mumm-Ra! Thanks to your stupidity, I have the Chain of Loyalty, and that spells the end of the Thundercats! [after Lion-O accidentally breaks the Chain] Wily-Kat: Give it to me! I saw it first! Wily-Kit: Back off, Wily-Kit! [they begin fighting] Lion-O: Wily-Kit! Kat! What in the name of Jaga do you think you're doing? Stop it! Wily-Kit: Oh, take a hike, Lion-O! Back off! Wily-Kat: Yeah! We're sick of being bossed around by you! Lion-O: What? Wily-Kit: Just who do you think you are anyway, huh? [they keep fighting] Mumm-Ra: Well, Thundercat, it seems you have done my work for me! Breaking the Chain of Loyalty has some interesting results, doesn't it? Instead of working together, the Thundercats fight amongst themselves! Eggbert (thinking): Now to get out of here and help Lion-O! No sign of that dreadful dog. I wonder where he is? If Mumm-Ra can trick Lion-O by disguising himself as me, maybe I can trick Ma-Mutt by disguising myself as Mumm-Ra! But that horrible hound will tear me to pieces if I fail! Now, pull yourself together, Eggbert! Be a Snarf! The Thundercats need you! (out loud, as Mumm-Ra) Ma-Mutt! Ma-Mutt! Can you hear me, you cantankerous canine? [Ma-Mutt wakes] Eggbert: I have another task for you! A task which will take you beyond the farthest horizons of Thundera! Go, Ma-Mutt -- follow the setting sun! Go now, and when you have reached that distant destination, I will contact you again! (thinking) I hope that worked! Well, only one way to tell... Panthro (thinking) : Getting warmer. I must be leaving the Caverns of Cold. Another couple of hours and I'll reach the Feliner! (Panthro laughs) What better place to ambush the Lord of the Thundercats! Lion-O: Cheetara! Tygra! Wait, stop! You don't know what you're thinking! Cheetara: Wrong, Lion-O! I know exactly what I'm doing! I'm going to destroy you! Tygra: Not if I get there first! And when I'm finished with Lion-O, I'll finish you! Lion-O: Stop this senseless fighting! We're Thundercats! I don't want to fight you; you're my friends! [Tygra ties Lion-O's feet with his whip] Lion-O: I'm sorry it's come to this, Tygra. [Lion-O pulls Tygra down] Lion-O: Panthro! Take it easy, Panthro. This is me, Lion-O! Your friend! Panthro: I have no friends! I hunt alone! Everyone is my enemy! [Panthro knocks Lion-O over] Say good-bye to tomorrow, Thundercat! "The Telepathy Beam" Luna: Time's a-wasting! If we're going to beat the Thundercats to the Treasure of Thundera, we've got to find a way to get to new Thundera! So what are you two geniuses doing about it? Alluro: Relax, Luna. Vultureman and I have come up with a plan to do just that, and more! Vultureman: Yeah! A bonus plan! Only one person on Third Earth has the know-how to modify the Skytomb for the journey -- Panthro! So, we capture him... Alluro: ...and persuade him to do the job. And the bonus is, in the process, we eliminate Cheetara for good!

[Cheetara is having a vision] Cheetara: The Berbil village--the Berbil village is under attack! Slithe and Monkian are strafing them with laser fire! They need our help! [later] Cheetara: We've got to hurry, Lion-O! There's no time to lose; my sixth sense has never been this strong before! The images are sharp, distinct, and... [Cheetara has another vision] Cheetara: ...it's even worse than I thought! Skytomb has arrived! It's a slave raid! Lion-O: We'll stop them! Stop them once and for all! [at the Ro-Bear Village] Lion-O: Ro-Bear Bill! Are you all right? Ro-Bear Bill: I'm fine. Thank you. Flowers? Cheetara: Where are the Mutants? Skytomb? I thought you were being attacked! Ro-Bear Bill: What made you think that? Cheetara: My sixth sense! I was sure you were being enslaved! Ro-Bear Bill: Not today... Cheetara: I... don't know what to say! I... [Cheetara has another vision] I was wrong! I'm seeing something else now! It's the Warrior Maidens who are under attack! Lion-O: Are you sure, Cheetara? Cheetara: Hurry, Lion-O! Alluro: This idea is brilliant, Vultureman! I don't know why we've never teamed up before! Vultureman: I knew our combined skills could make the Telepathy Beam work! All we have to do is plant enough phony images in Cheetara's mind, and soon her sixth sense will be worth two cents! [at the Warrior Maiden kingdom] Willa: We have had no trouble in a long time. The Mutants and the Lunataks leave us alone, now that they know you will come to our aid! Cheetara: I'm seeing things, Lion-O! My powers are failing me, and I brought us on two wild goose chases! Lion-O: I've never know you to be wrong before, Cheetara. Let's take a look around. We'll circle the woods. Lion-O: What's the matter, Cheetara? Is it another vision? Cheetara: I thought I saw Panthro. Tugmug and Alluro were after him. But I was wrong. It's nothing! Lion-O: Are you sure? Cheetara (thinking): I've made a fool of myself twice today, and that's two times too many! (aloud) I'm sure, Lion-O. Alluro (hypnotically): Listen carefully, Panthro, and pay attention! We need you to do a job for us, so we can do a job on the Thundercats! A hatchet job! Cheetara: I don't know what to tell you, Lion-O. I have no explanation for what happened today. It's as if-Tygra: Bad news, Lion-O! We found the Thunder-Tank abandoned, and no sign of Panthro anywhere! Cheetara: Oh no! I thought Panthro was in trouble, but I was afraid to say anything after what happened! I was afraid to look foolish, and now... oh! [Cheetara has a vision] Cheetara: I'm getting images of Panthro! He's on Hook Mountain! No, he's in the Pyramid... Castle Plun-Darr... oh, I don't know, I don't know what's real any more! Lion-O: We can't afford to let any lead go unchecked. Thunder-Kittens grab your Cat-suits and

get up to Hook Mountain and scour it. Tygra, grab the Spring-heels and check out Castle PlunDarr. I'll pay a call on Mumm-Ra! Cheetara: What about me, Lion-O? Lion-O: I... think you better stay here, Cheetara. Uh, the Feliner may call in for help! [Lion-O leaves] Cheetara: He's lost faith in me. And I don't blame him; I've lost faith in myself... [at Castle Plun-Darr] Tygra: Getting in there is no problem with these Spring-heels. And now, for the fast fade... now you see me... [Tygra turns invisible] ...now you don't! Redeye (to himself): Right on schedule! Bengali (on the radio): We're in trouble, Tower! We've lost power and our orbit is decaying! Lynx-O: Don't worry, Feliner. We'll recharge your energy bank from the Lair's Thundrillium tanks. Cheetara, are you monitoring? Cheetara: I'm monitoring, Tower, but-Lynx-O: Activate the remote power charge, Cheetara. Cheetara: I'm not sure which sequence... Pumyra (on the radio): We're shaking apart, Third Earth! Lynx-O: Activate now, Cheetara! Hurry! Cheetara: Too much power could blow them apart! One mistake and... Lynx-O: Press 12, 4, and 6 now! [Cheetara presses it] Pumyra: We're back in orbit, but just barely. I'm afraid we'll have to come back. Lynx-O: Very well, Feliner. I'm programming you for automatic return. Over and out. Cheetara: I'm sorry, Lynx-O. My indecision cost precious time and ruined the mission. Lynx-O: Cheetara, you know that sequence like the back of your hand. You taught it to me! What happened? Cheetara: I don't trust myself any more! Not after what's been happening! Lynx-O: Don't worry about that! [Luna has the Sword of Omens] Luna: Ho! Sword of Omens, give me sight beyond sight! Ah! This thing is worthless to us! Trash it, Amok! [Amok begins trying to break the Sword of Omens] Amok: Amok trash! [the Sword flies into the air] Cheetara: My sixth sense is out of control! Lynx-O: Listen to me, Cheetara. In piloting the Thunder-Claw, I've been picking up atmospheric readings like I've never seen before! Based on what you told me, I'd say it's some kind of psychoelectric field. Cheetara: You mean, someone is planting these images in my mind? Deliberately? Then I've got to fight back! But how? Lynx-O: Cheetara, I gather my information with my ears. And, because my hearing is acute, I pick up sounds that no one else hears. So many sounds that sometimes it's impossible to sort out the information they provide. When that happens, I quit listening with my ears, and listen with my heart. Listen to your heart, Cheetara. What does it tell you? Cheetara: I am Cheetara. In my heart, I know I'm the strongest of my kind, the pride of my people. I am unique in this universe, and I will not be defeated! [after the Thundercats escape] Luna: I don't know how you did this, but you're going to pay for it! Lion-O: Thunder! Thunder! Thundercats... ho! [the Feliner spots the Cats' signal] Pumyra: Look, Bengali! Lion-O needs us!

Luna: Aah, attack them! Alluro: Not just now, Luna! Look! No way can we take on the Feliner with our engines off line! It's time to cut and run! Luna: It's not over, Thundercat! We'll be back! Cheetara (watching the signal): Now there's one image I can always trust! Wily-Kit: Wow, Cheetara, we knew you were telepathic, but we never knew you were telekinetic! Cheetara: Neither did I, but I was so angry and desperate I tapped into strength I didn't know I had. Lion-O: Do you think you could do it again? Cheetara: I don't know, but I do know this: I'm stronger now. I may not be able to control my sixth sense, but I know that when I do use it, it won't weaken me the way it has in the past. Panthro: Well, it's been some day all right, but I better get my gear together! As soon as Snarf gets back from the Berbil village, we're going over the Tower to repair the Thunder-Claw. Cheetara: Then you better hurry, because Snarf should be getting here just about... now. [Snarf arrives] Snarf: I'm back! Did I miss anything? Wily-Kat: How did you know, Cheetara? Did your sixth sense tell you? Cheetara: No. I saw him coming from the window! "The Mark of Xero" Captain Dodgers / El Xero: From the darkness of space comes a hero, the righter of wrongs A hero named Xero! With the tip of his blade A deep X he has made The mark that stands for Xero! When evil tyrants steal With the sword they must deal This sword belongs to Xero! Dodgers: Good morrow, gentle kinsmen! Commandante Hildalgo: Ah, Captain Dodgers! It is a pleasure to see you! Dodgers: And you, Commandante. Of course you know my deaf-mute manservant Carsdez! Cadet: Hello! Hildalgo: I thought you said he was deaf and mute! Dodgers: Don't mess this up! We've got them completely fooled! Cadet: I know. But what's with all these costumed capers? Dodgers: You know that, as a Protectorate captain, I can't officially interfere with a lessadvanced planet. But I look out and see the suffering of the peasants, and my soul is touched. Give me your tired, your poor, your wretched garbage, yearning to drink tea! To be born free, as free as the wind blows, as free as the cock crows, with liberty and justice... for most! And besides, it's fun! Teresa: Our people suffer under the boot of Hildalgo! Dodgers: Such harsh talk from such a delicate face! [Hildalgo arrives] Hildalgo: Captain Dodgers! You forgot your hankie! Dodgers: Thanks! These things are more expensive than you think! Teresa: This is the man who has made misery of our lives! Hildalgo: Such harsh words from such a delicate face! Teresa: He already used that! [to Dodgers] Have you nothing to say?

Dodgers: Have you seen this one, my dear? [uses his handkerchief to conjure three birds] Teresa: All flash and no substance! Hildalgo: Sergeant! Take the senorita into custody! Vasquez: Guards! Teresa: You will never get away with this! Hildalgo: It appears, my dear, I already have! [screen fades to black] Dodgers: Hey, hey, hey! Wait a second! Just exactly what's going on here? [screen returns to normal] Hildalgo: I'm scheduling a little hanging for the young lady I just arrested. When El Xero hears of it, he'll come to the rescue. Then, I'll take care of him! Dodgers [repeating]: "The Commandante will take care of him"... thanks! I think I got it! Hildalgo: No problem! I majored in exposition in college! Cadet (disguised as a friar): Excuse me. I'm here to bring comfort and solace to the condemned. Guard #1: Go right in, padre. Guard #2: Huh! A pig! And I thought only a chicken could be a friar! Dodgers: This is the last time I buy a Mustang! Sergeant Vasquez: Commandante, we are losing light! Hildalgo: Yes. What say we fire up some torches? That will give us more dramatic illumination. Vasquez: Commandante, El Xero is very late. The crowd goes restless. Hildalgo: Yes, but you must admit the lighting is very dramatic. Vasquez: We must give the crowd something quick, or we'll lose them! Hildalgo: Watch out! El Xero is very cunning. He could be anywhere. Well, not anywhere, I guess. There is no reason he'd be at the bottom of this well. Unless he were a complete dolt. An idiot! But he's not; he is a worthy adversary. [El Xero comes out of the well behind him] Teresa: You're all substance, no flash! Dodgers: My hats off to you, gentlemen! [Throws his hat] A little trick I learned from Odd Ball. Oddjob: Odd Ball!? Dodgers: Another successful escape for El Xero! Hildalgo: I don't know if I'd go that far! Dodgers: Time for the climactic sword fight? Hildalgo: How perceptive! [after Hildalgo disarms him] Dodgers: Excuse me whilst I retrieve my wayword weapon. Let's watch the rough stuff, bub. I think you gave me a booboo on my pinky! Hildalgo: Enough! You fight well, but not well enough to defeat me! Dodgers: Even if I fail, the peasants will rise up and overthrow your evil empire. Hildalgo: The peasants are weak, and will do whatever I tell them. Dodgers: Wrong again! [The shadow of a mob appears on the nearby wall] Lo, the proletariat rises to thwart the evil oppressor! Hildalgo: You win, Xero. Dodgers: Have you seen this one? [takes off his mask] Hildalgo: Duck Dodgers! Vasquez: Told you! Dodgers: How about this one? [handcuffs Hildalgo] Cadet: Captain Dodgers, Captain Dodgers! That was great!

Dodgers: 'Twas nothing! So, um, where's your huddled masses yearning to breathe free? Cadet: They got bored and went home. So I made a reasonable facsimile out of shadow puppets! Dodgers: Well, that gives me an idea! In order to fill the power vacuum, we'll have to install a government! Cadet: Oh yeah? Dodgers: A puppet government! [cut to Dodgers using Cadet -- dressed as a king -- as a puppet] Dodgers: All right? Cadet: S'alright. "I See Duck People" Dodgers: Wow! Two full days of gorgeous golf at the Tiger Woods' Planet of Rest and Relaxation! This is going to be the game of a lifetime! And check out my fancy new duds! New shoes, a new moisture-wicking golf shirt, and these new derriere-slimming slacks! I got all the best new equipment! Dr. I.Q. High, Cadet: We noticed. Dodgers: Vintage is nice, but how about my high-tech putter? It's the Mind-u-Flex EZ. It broadcasts waves of sonic energy, allowing me to control the ball even after I hit it. Cadet: Isn't that cheating? Dodgers: I prefer the term "technologically-enhanced". Cadet: It seems like cheating to me. Dodgers: Maybe that's why you're wearing the stupid outfit! Dodgers: No way! It's a ghost! My ship is haunted! Cadet: But Captain Dodgers, there's no such thing as a gh-gh- uh, poltergeist! Dodgers: I'll have you know that certain members of the Dodgers' family are born with... a gift. Dr. I.Q. High: Just what are you getting at, Dodgers? Dodgers: I can communicate with the dead! [Lightning flashes] Dr. I.Q. High: Whoa! Was that lightning inside a space-ship? We better check this out! Cadet: I don't believe in spirits. Dr. I.Q. High: Me neither. This ghost business, it's pure hokum. Cadet: Silly nonsense. Silly juvenile nonsense! Dr. I.Q. High: Right you are, my boy. A sure sign of an infantile mind! Cadet: Yeah. For babies. Dr. I.Q High: Little girly babies! Cadet: Crying to their mamas! [mocking] "We're so scared!" Dr. I.Q. High: "Save us, mommy, from the scary ghosts!" Dodgers: Hold up! [Dr. I.Q. High jumps into Cadet's arms, terrified] Dodgers: The best way to flush out a poltergeist is with this! [takes out an instant camera] Cadet: That's just an old instant camera! Dodgers: Deceptively simple, but essential for spirit photography. I just snap a picture like so, wait a few seconds for it to develop, and behold! The ectoplasmic entity! [image of his thumb appears on the photo] Cadet: That's your thumb! Dodgers: Hmm. How about this one? Cadet: Thumb. [Dodgers takes many pictures] Dodgers: Well, chubby, take a look at these! Cadet [flipping through the photos]: Thumb. Camera strap. Thumb. Thumb. Thumb. Thumb. Lens cap. Eyeball. Thumb. [pauses, looks startled] [Dodgers takes the photo from him]

Dodgers: That's for an article I'm doing in a respected medical journal. Cadet: Um, this one's of a banana! Dodgers: Huh! Where would a banana come from? [looks over and sees I.Q. High eating a banana] Dodgers: What are you doing? Dr. I.Q. High: Well, if you must know, I have a potassium deficiency. [pauses] Bananas are loaded with potassium. Dodgers: Now I know why he never comes on these adventures. Dr. I.Q. High: Potassium deficiency is responsible for fatigue, constipation, insomnia, and low blood sugar! Dodgers: You doubted my powers, didn't you? But now the great unknown is staring you right in the puss! How foolish and small-minded you were! [to I.Q. High] That goes for you too, bananafiend! Dr. I.Q. High: I have a medical condition! Cadet: Captain Dodgers, where are you? Dodgers (disguised as fortune teller): Step forward! The Great Duckini knows all, sees all! I will be your bridge to the other side! My crystal will allow me to peer beyond the veil! Speak to me, o disembodied souls! The departed draw nearer! Cadet: I think he's in a trance. Dodgers: I am in a trance! I am your living conduit to the other side! The entities are beginning to speak! Aha! Did one of you have a grandfather? Dr. I.Q. High: Yes! Yes, I had a grandfather! Dodgers: Was your grandfather, by any chance, a man? Dr. I.Q. High: He was indeed! Dodgers: I'm getting something with a "p", a "p" word. Pam, pat, pan... did your grandfather ever wear pants!? Dr. I.Q. High: Oh my, you're freaking me out! Dodgers: Now, we haven't arranged any of this in advance, have we? Dr. I.Q. High: I've never met this duck before in my life! Cadet: This is ridic-ridic-ridicu-- er, just plain stupid! "Pig Planet" [at the wedding] Dodgers: Wow, she's one barb-e-cutie! Cadet: You know, you're right! She is kinda c-c-c--uh, she's hot. Dodgers: Yeah, they all start out that way. Then one day wake up all alone and find yourself in an empty house handcuffed to the radiator. I'm not bitter! Incense: What is the meaning of this? Zag: If I can't marry you and be king, no one will! Cadet: He's stolen my princess! Dodgers: Looks like she's been shanghaied and hogtied! Zag: Ha ha, looks like she's been shanghaied and hogtied! Dodgers: Now he's stealing my lines! Incense: Save me, my prince! Dodgers: Say, those were some pretty fancy manuevers! Cadet: Thanks, I play a lot of video games! Cadet: Halt, in the name of Imperial Traffic Court 839! Dodgers: ...You might want to try something with a little more bite to it. Cadet: We take our traffic laws very seriously.

Dodgers: We'll never catch 'em at this rate. Poor kid needs a little help... this rocket booster should do the trick. There! [rocket takes off] Cadet: Wow, that rocket just came of nowhere! It almost hit me in the head! Dodgers: Probably just some overenthusiastic royal watchers, celebrating your wedding with fireworks, or something like that! Oh no, those fools snagged their rocket on our carpet! There should be a law against that. Cadet: We're unravelling! Dodgers: Curse you, royal watchers! Incense: You'll never get away with this, Zag! Zag: Oh, my dear, don't be so cross. After all, that's no way to speak to your future husband! Incense: I will never marry you, you deviled ham! I'd sooner die than be your bride. Zag: Then you shall have your wish! Incense: Why did you bring me here to the power converters? Zag: Take a look. [Incense gasps] Zag: Just one little nudge and it's lava bath time... or you can come to your senses and be my bride... [off-camera] Dodgers: Hey, ham hock! We've got something for you! [slams into Zag] Cadet: I hope you realize I lettered in laser sabers in high school! [Cadet and Zag duel] [after Cadet disarms Zag] Dodgers: Hey, Cadet, what are you doing? Incense: Don't let him get up! Dodgers: This is a false ending! You know, a momentary pause when the hero has the upper hand but then the villain does something unexpected or reveals some secret device that leads to the real dangerous and exciting climax. I guarantee he's got something up his sleeve! Cadet (to Zag): You don't have anything up your sleeve, do you? Zag: As a matter of fact, dear cousin, I've been developing a technology to allows me to use these amazing Bracers of Lava Control to bend all thermodynamic energies to my very will. Dodgers: Thank you. Zag: Now witness my might! I have the power! [Zag raises a lava monster to fight for him] Incense: Oh no, that monster will turn my prince into an extra-crispy pork rind! Dodgers: Okay, this is where the beautiful girl comes up with a super-intelligent plan. Incense: But I don't think I can! Dodgers: Yes you can. Don't you see, you've always had it inside. You just needed this moment of crisis to bring it out. Incense: Oh, you're right! I do have an idea! Follow me! Incense: According to my calculations, if we redirect the dynamic matrix and energize the power string to 100%, the power converters will transform the lava monster into pure energy. Dodgers: Of course, it's all so simple! [pause] What do we do? Incense: Just pull that switch. [points to a large switch] Dodgers: Always gotta be the big heavy one, doesn't it? [after getting arrested by the Cadet] Zag: I hope the exile planet is nice this time of year... "Six Wazillion Dollar Duck"

Dr. I.Q. High: Those cyborganics cost 6 wazillion dollars. Duck Dodgers: Is that a lot? Dr. I.Q. High: It's so much money, we had to make up a number and multiply it by six just to count it! Dr. I.Q. High: There was already a hole in the floor! Why make another!? Duck Dodgers: It's like I'm invincible! Cadet: That makes one of us! Martian Centurion: You are now both prisoners of Mars! Steve Boston: I don't think so. Try again! Martian Centurion: Uh... surrender? There is no escape! Steve Boston: Even you don't believe that! Martian Centurion: ... we have fresh pie? Dodgers: Pie? What kind? Martian Centurion: Um... all your favorites! Dodgers: Impossible! You'd need an oil tanker just to carry them! Steve Boston: That's a shame. You should never lie. Especially about pie. Martian Queen: So, no Dodgers or Boston. If our scientists understood cyborganics, we wouldn't have to kidnap people! Martian Commander: I know, that's why I've hired an external robotics specialist for us! I present... Dr. Maniac! Martian Queen: Isn't he a mad scientist? And not a very good one? Martian Commander: He's turning his life around! Taking night classes, wearing pants, talking to his keys less... Dr. Maniac [to his keys]: No, not right now! Later, I promise! Jamie Winters: Excuse me, doctor? Shouldn't I be asleep? Dr. Maniac: You are asleep! Martian Commander: Um, actually, she's not. Dr. Maniac: That's a shame, because this is going to hurt! Are you a doctor? Martian Commander: No. Dr. Maniac: Are you sure? Because we should really have a doctor here! Martian Commander: You're a doctor! Your name is Doctor Maniac, remember? Dr. Maniac: Oh! Right, right! Well, never mind! Scalpel? Martian Queen: I told you, we don't have a scalpel! You were supposed to bring one, because you're a doctor! Dr. Maniac: I am?! Martian Queen: Perhaps we should rethink this. Jamie Winters: I'm with her. Martian Commander: Oh, give him a chance! This is his first surgery! Jamie Winters, Martian Queen: First!? Martian Commander: Uh, didn't I mention that? Dr. Maniac: And didn't I ask for a scalpel? Jamie Winters: Seriously, I'll tell you everything I know about cyborganics if you'll stop making balloon hats! Dr. Maniac: Excuse me! These are neuro-inhibited detonators! Jamie Winters: They're... balloon hats! Bigfoot: Balloon hats! Dr. Maniac: Okay, fine, big boy. They're balloon hats filled with explosive gas. Are you happy now? Jamie Winters: Not really!

Martian Commander (to Martian Queen): Okay, he's a friend of my uncle's and he needed a job. He does have experience... [mumbling] as a circus clown. Martian Centurion: You are now all prisoners of Mars! Steve Boston: Do we really have to do this again? Martian Centurion: ...no. Go right ahead! Duck Dodgers: Good to see you again! Martian Centurion: You too! Martian Queen: I thought you said your Vortex Tunnel would stop them. Dr. Maniac: It did! Martian Queen: No it didn't! They're right there! Dr. Maniac: Who's right there? Martian Queen: Arrgh!! [takes out microphone; feedback] Sorry! Welcome, gentleman! I'm sure you've noticed your friend's accessories! The hats, while ridiculous, will destroy the lab and everyone in it if removed. As for the collars, they use high-voltage shocks to turn you against each other. Whoever survives will have the honor of joining our new army of cyborganic warriors. [to Maniac] You're sure the collars will work? Dr. Maniac: Work? I never said that. No, no, no! Steve Boston: Jamie. Just hit me. I can take it. [She does] Steve Boston: You don't have to hit that hard. Jamie Winters: Sorry. Got a little carried away. AARGH! [She hits him again] Sorry again, honey! Cadet: Captain, you have to help Steve! Dodgers: Help Steve?! He's fighting the girl! I'm the one who needs help! Jamie Winters: Did that hurt, sweetheart? Cadet: Steve can't fight his wife! You're the only one who can stop this! Dodgers: Hey, I warned him. He was too 'in love' to listen to his best friend! Cadet: Then do it for your other best friend! Dodgers: Pizza? Cadet: No. Me. Dodgers: Fine. But don't tell pizza about this. Dr. Maniac: I am so happy for them! You know, we should buy them a gift. Something... red. Martian Commander: Come on, Dr. Maniac. I hear they're hiring at Waffle Warehouse. Dr. Maniac: Oh no! Don't say waffles! Anything but waffles! Wait a minute; I'm thinking of... pancakes! Never mind! Dr. Maniac: Don't fear, my jumbo-footed friend. Soon, we'll conquer this Waffle Warehouse. Then Mars. Then... more Waffle Warehouses! All thanks to my latest invention... Bigfoot: Stereo! Dr. Maniac: Okay, that's what I'm going to call it! The STEREO! Oh, we make a fine team, you and I! Boss: Hey! Knock off that racket! Dr. Maniac: Quick, my furry ally! More batter! Bigfoot: Aargh! Duck! Nappers Never Sleep Rodeo Clown: They wouldn't let me in. My father was a rodeo clown, and my father's father! You don't understand! Ingrid: Fillmore, when I signed onto the safety patrol, no one ever said anything about having to dress up like this.

Fillmore: Going undercover's part of the gig, Ingrid. Besides, you were good at rodeo clowning. What was your clown name again? Ingrid: Daffodil, Fillmore. "Duck Codgers" Duck Dodgers: I think I shall never see, a thing as lovely as a flower. Dodgers [reading]: 'The pollen of the Ferocious Octogerius creates an allergic reaction that causes most species, especially Earthlings to age in a rapidly accelerating manner.' Ah! I'm doomed! Cadet: But, wait! There's a cure! Dodgers: There is? Cadet: 'The special water...' Dodgers: Ducks love water! Cadet: ...of a one-of-a-kind mineral spring... Dodgers: 'kay! Cadet: ...that flow deep beneath the imperial Martian palace. Dodgers: The palace with the guards and the... zappy things that burn you like toast? [Dodgers's hair turns gray] Dodgers: ...set a course. Martian Commander: A thousand pardons, my queen, but Duck Dodgers' ship has been detected heading straight for us. Martian Queen: Duck Dodgers? Martian Commander: Yes, your Beautifulness. I mean, your Highness! Martian Queen: Something serious must be going on for Dodgers to risk coming here. Observe him. Report to me. Cadet: Should I call the paramedics? Dodgers: Eh, put 'em on speed-dial! Baby Martian Commander: Me blast ducky-wucky into chunky-wunky! Dodgers [about the Cadet]: Oh, the poor little guy! There ain't nothin' left of him! Ashes to ashes, pork to dust! I just wish I would've had a chance to stay good-bye. [Starts crying] [Cadet shows up and starts crying too] Cadet: Need a tissue, friend? It's coated with lanolin! Dodgers: Cadet! You're alive! Boy am I happy to see--hey, what are you crying about anyway?? Cadet: I lost my glasses! Baby Martian Commander: Goo goo! Dodgers: Alright, Martian! Let's get this over with once and for all! Baby Martian Commander: Goo goo ga ga mama dada! Dodgers: Don't you mama dada me! Feel the sting of my laser saber! Baby Martian Commander [starts crying]: Dodgers: Keep your diaper on, Sonny! I'll be with you in a moment! Cadet! How do you turn this flippidy-gibbet doohickey on! Cadet: Green button is on, red button is off. Or... or is it the green button is percolate and the red button is Esperanto? Dodgers: Ah, forget it! "The Return" Supergirl: A barbershop?

Steel: I gotta hand it to you, Luthor; nobody would think to look for you here! Atom: The android... why does he hate you so much? Lex Luthor: I once took advantage of his naivete. He's not so naive any more, and I've stopped taking advantage of the innocent. Atom: Let's hope you'll be more convincing if you have to tell him that! Martian Manhunter: Have you come to offer help? Dr. Fate: Not help. Hope. Martian Manhunter: It's... the only way. Dr. Fate: Hmm. Those words are always used to justify destruction. Martian Manhunter: We can only guess how much power the android has amassed as its worked its way across the galaxy. It has to be stopped, Fate, here and now, not just for the sake of this world, but for all worlds. Dr. Fate: Then for the sake of all worlds, I will continue to seek a better way. [after the Atom shrinks himself and Luthor down to a subatomic level] Luthor: A subatomic universe... Atom: Figured the android can't kill what he can't see. [Amazo's face appears above them] Amazo: Oh, but I can see you. Did you really think I couldn't follow you here? No universe, however large, however small, is denied to me. Amazo: You have everything humans desire. Wealth, power... yet you crave more, and you will do anything to get it. Why? What is your ultimate purpose? Luthor: What you're really asking is... what is yours? Green Lantern: What the Devil is going on? Dr. Fate: Lex Luthor... is saving the world. Luthor: The truth is... for all my struggles to make my mark in life, for all I've accomplished, in just a few short generations my name will be forgotten. Even the greatest of us can't compete with time. And death. Amazo: Then why do you go on? Why does anyone? Why don't I just destroy you, and everything else, right now? All it would take is a single thought, and-Luthor: No! If you do that, you won't see the end of it! Amazo: The end of what? Luthor: The evolutionary process. You of all beings should know something about that! Amazo: Yes. Yes, I'm evolving. That's why Professor Ivo made me. These past months, I have amassed so much knowledge, and yet, I remain confused. Empty. What am I evolving into? What is my purpose? I must know! TELL ME! Luthor: There's no way to tell. And that's why I stay in the game. My purpose, if you will, is to see where it's all going. And you! You'll live forever; you'll be able to see it all! Amazo: Is that my purpose? Simply to be... a witness? Luthor: We create our own purpose in life. Now go create yours! [pause] You know, when I heard you were coming, I was actually afraid of you. Petrified! But now, when I see your fear, your uncertainty, I just pity you. Atom: ...you should have quit while you were ahead. Atom: Told you we'd beat him! Luthor: What do you mean, we? "The Great Brain Robbery"

"The Power Within" Shendu: Valmont, are your men blind? It would seem those possessed of sight might have taken note that the shield contained no talisman! Ratso: Why is the boss taking guff from a statue? Finn: ...cause it talks? Valmont: Rest assured, Shendu, you will have you talisman. And I will ensure that Jackie Chan never again interferes with the Dark Hand. Ever. Uncle: Ancient legend speaks of 12 talismans, one for each animal of the Chinese zodiac. Each possessing a different magic. Jade: What kind of magic? Uncle: Legend also says that the talismans were scattered to the four corners of the globe. If this, or any talisman, should fall into evil hands-Jade: --Jackie will give them smacky with his lightning fists of steel! Jackie: The wise seek power within themselves. The foolish seek it in others. Until you harness the power within yourself, I cannot teach you. Jade: Huh? Jackie: It means that you must have the discipline to behave yourself. Now eat your food. Jade: Power within? Got it. Jade (reading fortune cookie): "Danger looms in your future". Uncle: We must be very cautious... Jackie: You listen to a cookie? [The Enforcers walk up] Finn: Evening, Chan! Uncle: Never mock the cookie. Jackie (to fleeing Enforcers): Thank you for dining with us! Finn: Mr. Valmont, sir? It didn't go quite as planned. Valmont: Regale. Finn: Well, we stomped Chan. Ratso: Stomped him good! Finn: ...but we didn't see any talisman. Valmont: You will be punished. Shendu: Hindsight, Valmont. But perhaps the blind can be made to see... with the eyes of a dragon! Jackie: Ancient proverb: Do not fight when you can run! Tohru: The tracker points to the girl, but she does not have the talisman. Valmont: Well, it must be hidden on her somewhere. I'm sure she didn't eat it. Shendu: Man is much the wiser, when he looks within... Tohru: I understand. Valmont: And while you're at it, eliminate Jackie Chan. Tohru: I... hate fish! Jade: Why fight when you can run? Jackie: You're learning! "The Mask of El Toro Fuerte"

Jackie: A Chinese talisman in the tip of Mexico! Uncle wasn't kidding about the 'four corners of the globe' thing. [spotting Chan from outside] Finn: He's in the pyramid. Let's move. New Guy: Uh, don't pyramids have mummies inside them, sir? Finn: Only in Egypt. New Guy: Why don't we just let Chan find the talisman? Just take it from when he climbs out. Finn: Listen up, new guy. We don't know what power this Ox talisman has. Chan might come busting out of there fifty-feet tall with laser eyes. New Guy: I don't wanna fight giant laser eyes! Everyone after him, now now now! Jackie: Why are you here? You are supposed to be back at the hotel, doing your homework? Jade: Lucky for you, I breezed through! Tohru was gonna bust you like a pinata! Jackie: Thank you! But don't finish your homework early again; it's too dangerous! Paco: Hola. I am Paco. What might a charming senorita such as yourself be doing this evening? Jade: Ew! Are you asking me on a date? Paco: Oh, no, no, no! I am gathering an audience for El Toro Fuerte. Jade: El Who-o What-ay? Paco: El Toro Fuerte: Mexico's mightiest wrestler! He has never lost a match. I want to grow up to be just like him! Jade: Wrestling? Tch! Everybody knows that's all fake! Paco: El Toro Fuerte is no fake! El Toro Fuerte is undefeatable, because El Toro Fuerte is the best. Jade: Oh, really? See that guy over there? [points to Jackie] He's the best wrestler in the world! Paco: The Mouse Man? Jade: He can smack your boy down. Paco: Can not! Jade: Can too! Paco: Can not! Jade: Can too! Paco: Can not! Jade: Can too! Paco: Then the two best should meet, don't you think? I will see you and your Mouse Man tonight, senorita...? Jade: Jade. Paco: Jade! Jackie: Jade. One should not fight for the sake of fighting, but only when one has no other choice. Jade: Makes sense! When you get in the ring and this El Toro guy starts wailing on you, you'll have no other choice. Jackie: Er... you have an interesting mind, young Jade! Tohru: Hello, Chan. [turns Jackie Chan upside down] The talisman! [Jackie is unconscious] Uncle's Head: Jackie! Jackie! Remember, Jackie; each talisman possesses a different magic. Jackie: Yes, yes, Uncle, twelve animals, Chinese zodiac. Uncle's Head: One more thing. What happened to you? You lost that match so fast and he gave you such a whooping! Jackie: I know! He was strong! Uncle's Head: Hmm... perhaps the power of the Ox talisman is strength! Jackie: Ohh, of course! Strength! Uncle's Head: One more thing! [hits Jackie; Jackie wakes up]

Jade: How could you not win? Jackie: Jade, the Ox talisman gave El Toro superhuman strength. Jade: [pause] Knew it! Wrestling is so fake! Finn: El Toro! Meet Tohru. Tohru, Toro. Toro, Tohru. Tohru-- [Tohru shoves him aside] Tohru: The mask. El Toro: El Toro Fuerte never removes his mask. Tohru: Then I will remove it for you! Paco (to El Toro): Jade was right! You are a fake! [leaves] Jade: Mr. Toro, we gotta help Jackie. El Toro: Paco is right. I am a fake. Jade: Come on, come on, come on! Up we go! El Toro: With the power of the Ox, I was undefeatable. Ha! Jade: I think I hear Jackie screaming! You know, the nice guy you knocked out twice? He's in big trouble, and you owe him! El Toro: And without the mask, I can help no one. [Jade hands him his mask] Jade: Hey, lookie here, you're golden! El Toro: And without the talisman, the mask is useless. Jade: Tch! Forget about the magic. Look, Mr. Toro; Jackie once told me, 'The wise seek power within themselves. The foolish seek it within others'. El Toro: Que? Jade: Yeah, I don't know where Jackie gets this stuff either, but what I think it means is, you're not going to let a little girl go fight those bad boys all by herself, now are you!? Jade: Mr. Toro! [throws him the Ox talisman] El Toro: Gracias, Jade. But I would rather lose with dignity, than with by deception. Paco: El Toro? [El Toro throws the talismans back to her] Jade: Whatever! [Tohru knocks Jackie and El Toro out with one blow] Tohru: Now tell me: who is the mightiest? Jade: Give you a clue! [drop kicks Tohru into a wall] Paco: El Toro Fuerte? Will you teach me the ways of the wrestler? El Toro: With all the wisdom of my experience. "Project A, for Astral" [Finn holds up the Sheep talisman to Valmont's video-screen] Finn: Valmont? Score! Valmont: And Chan? Finn: We'll miss him dearly! [fires rockets] [after witnessing Jackie run up a falling train] Ratso: No way he's human! Uncle: What did you bring me? Jackie: The Sheep talisman? Uncle: Good! Now we can do research! Jackie: Oh, but I'm very tired. Uncle: Oh, I'm sorry. [holds the talisman up to his ear] Wait. Jackie: What is it? What do you hear? Uncle: I hear the sound of the Sheep not telling me what power it holds!

Shendu: Chan possesses yet another talisman, while I have none? You are weak, Valmont, and your men are fools! Finn: That's it! I ain't taking no more lip from a statue! [draws his gun] Shendu: I am no statue; you stand in the presence of a demon sorcerer. I once held dominion over a vast empire, but my subjects betrayed me. They cast a chi spell which imprisoned me in this pitiful icon where I have remained for 900 years. The twelve talismans from which I drew my powers were scattered to the winds. Ratso: Whoa. Finn: You got jacked. Shendu: Acquisition of all the talismans will allow me to be free of my confinement and walk the Earth once again. Valmont: At which time, we will be rewarded the lost treasure of Qin Shi Huang. Well worth taking a little lip, don't you think? Finn (sheepishly): Heh. Uncle: One more thing! Stay awake! You break many antiques when you sleepwalk. Jackie: I don't sleepwalk! Uncle: So, you break my antiques for fun? [outside Uncle's shop] Ratso: Waste of time. They probably got it locked up at Section 13 by now. Wherever that is... [the Seeker Wand activates] Finn: Uh, I'm sorry, did you say something? Ratso: So Chan lifts a whole bus off the ground and chucks it at us! Finn: He wasn't easy to take down, but we knew how much you wanted this. [takes out the Sheep talisman] [Valmont throws the Sheep talisman to Shendu] Valmont: Cheers, Shendu. The first of an even dozen. Shendu: I am free! The Sheep talisman enables me to project my astral form. An admirable start, but I must have the others! Ratso: Yeah, but finding Section 13 won't be as easy as taking a talisman out of a sleeping kid's hand-- [Finn elbows him] Valmont (sardonically): Did that occur before or after Chan chucked the bus? Shendu: This 'sleeping child' may not be sleeping at all. And if her spirit wanders... [Shendu projects his astral form] ...her vessel has a vacancy! [in astral form] Jade: Whoa! What are you? Shendu: Everything you will grow to fear! Hah! [Shendu flies into Jade's body] Jackie: This will sound crazy but-Uncle: Jade took the talisman and now she is trapped in astral form while an evil spirit walks in her body! Jackie: Uh... yes? Uncle: Sheep talisman put a wolf in sheep's clothing. You find Jade, and I will find a chi spell to banish the wolf. Jade: Go Uncle! Jackie: Captain Black! Trust me, you are in terrible danger! Jade is evil! Captain Black: I know she's a handful, Jackie, but evil? Melvin Moose: Duhh, smile for the camera? Shendu (as Jade): Soon, I shall devour your soul. [Melvin Moose flinches]

[at the amusement park] Jackie: Captain Black! Get away from her! Captain Black: Whoa, there, Jackie. Jackie: She's not really Jade! The talisman's magic has made her a sheep! Er, no, I mean-- I'll prove it! What's the moose's name? The name! Jade: Give you a hint: another word for wedgie! Jackie: You can't name it, can you? You're evil! You're evil! Captain Black: Jackie, you look like you could use a little sleep. [Shendu/Jade knocks out Captain Black and the other agent] Jackie: Who are you? Shendu: Your executioner! [after being banished and trapped back into his statue by the spell] Shendu: Cannot...break... free! Blasted chi spell! Valmont: Shendu? Back so soon? What, no talismans? "Shell Game" Nelson: Andrews, have a look! I've never seen anything like it! Andrews: I've seen you see something just like it, Nelson. It's called a 'tortoise'. Nelson: No, no, look here! There's something encrusted onto its shell. [close-up on the Rabbit talisman in the tortoise's shelf] Andrews: Oh my! What do you think it is? Jackie: Breathe deeply. The breath flows to the fingertips, and down to the toes-Jade: --then the toes go up... the bad guy's nose! Hyah! [karate kicks the air] [Jackie glowers at her] Jade: What? He was asking for it! Jackie: Discipline, Jade! Jade: But I want to be a lean mean Jackie Chan machine! Jackie: Don't be in such a hurry! 'Slow and steady wins the race'. Jade: Chinese proverb, right? Jackie: Greek, actually. The story of the Tortoise and the Hare. Once upon a-- where are you going? Jade: Breakfast! Race ya! [Jade runs off] [Finn is flipped through the channels] Valmont: Stop! Finn: Ah! Valmont! Uh, new suit! Looking sharp! Valmont: Go back one. [Valmont sees the Rabbit talisman in the turtle's shell] Valmont: Tohru! Jade: So there I was, flying the plane, all by myself, no co-pilot, and Jackie's hanging out the back, flopping around, with no parachute or anything! Drew: Yeah, right, I bet the snake lady was there too. Jade: Viper? Nah, that was in New York! Ms. Hartman: Jade! Perhaps you can answer the question for us? Jade: Uh, that last question, or the one before it, Ms. Hartman? Ms. Hartman: The one you would have heard if you were paying attention. Perhaps you need an extra credit assignment? Jade: Hmm... dibs on the topic? Jackie: Jade, there really is a talisman in the tortoise, and if you saw it on TV, you can bet the

Dark Hand did too! Jade: Tch, like the bad guys watch-[The Enforcers smash through the wall] Jade: ...TV. Valmont: You know, Shendu, these talisman expeditions... heh, let's just say I'm racking up some hefty out of pocket expenses, and as of yet, there's nothing coming back into my pocket. Shendu: When, and only when your men acquire all twelve talismans, the Lost Treasure of Qin Shi Huang shall cover your expenses ten thousand times over. Valmont: The reputed Lost Treasure... Shendu: Aahh, so we have a skeptic... [A Shadowkhan emerges, carrying a piece of the treasure] [Finn is on the video phone with Valmont] Finn: Valmont, we scored the talisman! Heh heh, and a team mascot! Valmont: You have the tortoise? Finn: Uh, when Chan showed, we had to bail with the snail. Valmont: Prepare for a detour. I have an acquaintance who I'm certain will pay top dollar for our endangered friend. Finn: That's why you're the boss, V! [phone rings] Whoa, getting another call! Yello! [inaudible] Yo, Ratso! [inaudible] Oh! Sorry, dude! Ratso: Forget sorry! I need a ride! [inaudible] Where? [inaudible] Yeah, I can find it. Jackie (whispering): He's arranging to meet with the others. Jade (whispering): Cool! Now we jump him? Jackie (whispering): Keep low, he'll see us! Ratso: But this time wait for me! [Ratso storms off] Carl Nivor: Care to join me for dinner? Tohru: Thank you. No. Nivor: But we're having quite the delicacy. A dish to rare you might say it's... endangered. Turtle soup! [to the Chef] Nivor: Well? The sooner you fetch a forklift, the sooner I can lift a fork to my lips. Jade: Jackie! Where are you going? Jackie: After the talisman! Jade: But what about Aesop? Jackie: You can choose another topic for your report. Jade: Duh, this isn't about the report! Aesop's going to be that creepy guy's din-din if we don't do something. Jackie: We will do something, after I get the talisman! Follow me! Jade: But you never want me to follow you, and Aesop's in immediate danger! Jackie: Jade, we don't know what power this talisman possesses. If the Dark Hand, people could be in danger! Jade: Oh, so you're okay with letting something that looks just like Uncle get eaten? Jackie: Ah, where do you come up with these things? [Tohru appears] Tohru: Chan! I thought I heard your voice!

"Bullies"

Shendu: Valmont? Where is the Dragon talisman? Valmont: My men are on it. Shendu: Your men could not find their own shadows, and your incompetence continues to stupefy me. Valmont: Oh? I'll stupefy you-- [the Shadowkhan appear around him] Shendu: Temper, Valmont... Valmont: The arrogance of that over-sized lawn ornament. Finn: Valmont! Check it out! Valmont: You actually did your job? Imagine! Finn: You're not stoked? Valmont: I'm absolutely giddy! [hurls the Dragon talisman into the wall] [after embedding the talisman] Valmont: Puff the Magic Dragon. Jackie: I'm going with you. Jade: Uh, Jackie? You're not a secret agent. You're an archaelogist, right? Jackie: I know that, Jade. I'm just going to retrieve a talisman. [Jackie leaves] Uncle: His anger clouds his judgment. Jade: I noticed. [inside the U.S. Mint] Valmont: A shame Captain Black won't be visiting today! I understand he had a doctor's appointment. [Jackie Chan screams in anger and karate chops the railing] Valmont: Chan! [after catching Jackie] Valmont: Jackie Chan! Finally, we meet. It was nice knowing you. Captain Black was lucky, but my aim has improved with practice... [a man grabs Uncle from behind] Jade: Uncle? How do you spray for bugs? Uncle: Ohh! Like this! [He stomps on the man's foot] Shendu: Valmont, where are you? Valmont! [pause] Something is amiss. [summons his Shadowkhan] Find Valmont. Find my talisman. Jade: Valmont's still dragon-powered! How is Jackie going to take him down? Uncle: By not fighting. Valmont: You really go for the gold, Mr. Chan. Fool's gold. Jackie: You know, Valmont? I was wondering, what is one of these worth? An all expenses paid trip to Melvin World? [tosses a gold brick into the water] Valmont: You'll pay for that! [Jackie begins throwing dozens of gold bricks into the water] Jackie: What about these? A new Ferrari? Valmont: Chan! Jackie: A summer home? Your own private island to build it on? A robot butler to build it on? Valmont: Aaarrrgh! [blasts his ship in half] Blast. Valmont: Shendu, I beg your forgiveness.

Shendu: You may earn it. Rumor tells of a talisman hidden at the North Pole. Dress warmly... "The Rock" [the henchmen all have colds] Finn: Big V, d-d'you think you c-could turn up the h-heat? Shendu: Allow me. [Shendu breathes fire at them] Finn: That's plenty! Ratso: Much o-obliged. Valmont: Careful, Shendu. If you charbroil the help, they'll never find the next talisman. Shendu: The 'next talisman' is insufficient, Valmont. I need all twelve to shed this petrified form, and regain my true powers. Valmont (tersely): We are working on it, Shendu. Shendu: With your customary ineptitude, once again, this Chan has snatched a talisman from your so-called professional... Ratso: Too bad Chan ain't working for us! Valmont: Perhaps he can be persuaded... [at the vault] Jackie: It's not polite to hack into security systems that don't belong to you! Jade: I saw a '7'! [a Shadowkhan hands Valmont a vial containing a poison] Shendu: This potion should accommodate your needs perfectly, Valmont. Valmont: Then by this time tomorrow, Chan will have no choice but to work for the Dark Hand. Now for the bait. Uncle: I have translated the inscription on the back of the talisman! A very perplexing riddle... Jackie: 'If activated, the noble Horse expels all alien forces within'. Jade: I bet those alien forces fly out and latch out onto human brains and turn people into mindcontrol zombies to conquer the world! [Jackie and Uncle stare at her] Jade: Uh, alien forces signal the Mother Ship to launch an invasion? [Jackie and Uncle stare at her] Jade: This... isn't the Martian talisman? Uncle: There is no such thing as Martians! The talismans are magic! [on Mt. Rushmore, after seeing the fake talisman in the statue's eye] Jackie: Aah, what big eyes you have. Don't blink, Mr. President. [takes the talisman] The Snake talisman? We already got that one! [the fake talisman injects him with poison -- Jackie starts to collapse] Valmont: Upsy-daisy! [lifts Jackie Chan to safety] Oh, snake bite? Could be fatal! Jackie: You bring me all the way out here just to poison me? Valmont: A rather appropriate lure, since the venom now rushing through your veins will soon turn you to stone. Jackie: Just because I believe in magic talismans doesn't mean that I'm gullible! Valmont: Visual aid! [catches a fly and injects it with the venom; it quickly turns to stone] In twelve hours, Mr. Chan, you shall be among the statuesque. Valmont: The venom takes 12 hours to fully infect humans. Fortunately for you, an antidote does exist. I can provide you with that antidote, Mr. Chan. Jackie: What's the catch? Valmont: An exchange of goods -- the cure to your affliction, for the talismans in Section 13. Should you decide you're interested in my offer, you may rendezvous with my men at Koyt Tower in exactly 11 hours 52 minutes. And, don't forget the talismans...

Jade: You're turning to stone? Jackie: I have until 6 am. Valmont's men will be waiting with the antidote at Koyt tower. Jade: W-what are we going to do? Uncle: The riddle of the Horse talisman can wait. I will make an antidote! Jackie: But Uncle, we don't know the formula. Uncle: Bah! Mine will be just as good! [hands Jackie something to eat] Swallow. [Jackie chokes on it] Jade: That's the antidote? Uncle: No. Fermented beetle larva -- it's good protein. [Uncle gives Jackie a potion] Uncle: Drink. [Jackie's face contorts] Uncle: Nothing. D-don't look in the mirror! [Jackie looks in the mirror and screams when he sees his face covered in scales] Uncle: I told you not to look in the mirror! Jackie: I am a lizard! I will become a stone lizard! [after the 1st antidote fails] Jade: Maybe Captain Black can get the Section 13 doctors to help? Uncle: Pah! Modern medicine has no power over ancient spells. I will make another antidote. Jade: Jackie, you have to give the talismans to Valmont! Jackie: I can't. According to the legend, the power of each talisman is nothing compared to the power of all twelve combined. Jade: But if you're all turned to stone, who's going to stop the Dark Hand from getting the talismans anyway? Jackie: That's Captain Black's department. I'm just research, remember? Jade: Jackie, please! I don't want a boulder for an Uncle! [Jackie calls Captain Black] Jackie: Captain Black? I need a ride back to Section 13 for Jade. It's past her bedtime. Jade (quietly): Okay, if that's the way you want it... Uncle: I have a new antidote! This may sting. [blasts Jackie in the face with a fireball] [after making the trade for the antidote] Tohru: One is missing. Jade: No way! I cleaned out the vault! [gasps] I forgot the Horse one at Uncle's! Um, if you give me the antidote, I really for-sure promise to get you the other one. Scout's honor? Finn: Tch, like she's a scout! [Tohru smashes the antidote] Jade: Noo! Why? Tohru: Because Chan makes me sick! [after catching the talisman] Jackie: The Dark Hand... will... never... have all... twelve! [turns to stone] [pause] Ratso: A dollar says his hand will snap right off! Finn, Chow: Deal! [after using the talisman] Tohru: My cold is gone! Like magic! Uncle: 'The noble horse expels all alien forces within'... Jade: The riddle! It doesn't mean aliens within the talisman, it means aliens within the sick person

holding the talisman! Uncle: The Horse is the healing talisman! Jade: Think it only works on colds? "The Dog and Piggy Show" Tohru: Chan! The tali-Jackie: -sman? What talisman? [Tohru holds up the talisman-tracking statue] Tohru: The ones the dragons indicate! Jackie: Ohh, this talisman! You know, Tohru, you really should consider coming over the good side? Section 13 has a marvelous dental plan, and every Thursday is Donut Day! [on the phone] Jade: Jumping Jackal? It's me. Fearless Hyena. Jackie: Jade-Jade: Shh! Wise old goat roams near! Jackie: What? Jade: Ancient rabbit has very long ears! Jackie: What are you talking about? Jade: It's Uncle's birthday, where are you? Jackie: My flight had a layover in Bavaria. If I never see Bavaria again-Jade: Jackal, this isn't about you! Jackie: Don't worry, Jade. My plane will arrive in plenty of time [whispering] for Operation Surprise! Uncle: Jade. Jade! Jade! Jade: Ah! Uncle, you scared me! Uncle: And the rock and roll noise is scaring away the customers. Jade: Tch, it's hiphop, duh! Come on, Uncle Coolio, I'll teach you some moves! Uncle (sighing): My hip does not hop... [Uncle drops a vase] Uncle: I am like that antique. Jade: Uh... valuable? Uncle: Old... and brittle. Uncle: I will do research now. Jade: But Uncle, we have cake! We have to celebrate! Uncle: When I am another year younger, then I will celebrate. Valmont: You failed to retrieve the talisman, and you sat on this! [holds the broken Seeking Device] Shendu: The Seeking Device was forged by magic. Such things are hard to come by. Tohru: Apologies, master. Valmont: Perhaps the time has come to have a freelancer lead future missions. Tohru: No need, master. I will do better! Valmont: Ah, too late! Tohru, meet Hak Foo. [Hak Foo enters] Tohru: The... Black Tiger? He does not look so ferocious. Hak Foo: Angry crow takes flight! Eagle stands on mountaintop! Monkey plucks two peachesssss! Ah! [Hak Foo lands on Tohru's shoulders] Tohru: Uh... looks can be deceiving! Uncle: 'The Dog talisman is best friend to man. It restores youthful energy to its holder... and grants eternal life.' Hmm... immortality...

Valmont: The mainframe indicates that one Mr. Chan has purchased three airline tickets to Bavaria. The Dark Hand jet awaits. Tohru, be a sport and tag along, in the event Hak Foo requires your services. And when you meet our friend, Jackie Chan... Hak Foo: Smashing melon fist! [smashes a melon with his fist] Uncle: You know, Jade, they have hiphop here in Bavaria? Jade: Really? Uncle: Yes! They call it oompah! [They both laugh] Tohru: So... uh... where shall we begin our serach for the talisman? Hak Foo: I don't know. You sat on the seeking device, remember? Tohru: Well, the only talismans left to be found are the Tiger and the... [sees pigs everywhere] Pig. Hak Foo: Wait here and stand watch. And I mean stand. Less chance you'll break something. Hak Foo: Seeking a talisman? Only counterfeits here. Jackie: Do I know you? Hak Foo: I am Hak Foo, the last human you will ever lay eyes upon. [Hak Foo beats Jackie] Hak Foo: Black Tiger crushes Chan. [Uncle and Jade enter the room] Uncle: You! Tiger Man! Remove your feet from Jackie! Jackie: What's a Jackie? Hak Foo: Take your leave, or feel the burn! Uncle: You talk the talk, but can you walk the walk? Hak Foo: Gorilla snaps frail twig! [Uncle leaps out of the way] Uncle: Twig may be frail, but roots are slippery! Hak Foo: Angry crow takes flight! [Hak Foo leaps into the air] Uncle: Thank you for sharing angry crow! [Uncle leaps as well] Jackie: Jade, Uncle just leapt twenty feet into the air! Jade: Go Uncle! Hak Foo: Elephant thrusts its leg! [leaps, then punches Uncle into a nearby wall] I meant 'fist'! Hak Foo: Retire from talisman-hunting, Chan. It is a hazardous occupation. Uncle's Head: Uncle! Uncle! Uncle: Yes, Uncle? Uncle's Head: What happened? You got such a whooping! Uncle: Big mouth had a big fist! Uncle's Head: One more thing, there is work to do. You must acquire the Pig talisman and discover the power that it possesses. Uncle: But... I'm dead. Uncle's Head: Ai-yah! How can you be dead? You are wearing the immortality talisman! Uncle: Oh. Right. Uncle's Head: One more thing! [whacks him in the head; Uncle wakes up] Uncle: Uncle! You're okay! Uncle's Head: See? Lots of garlic is good for you! We must get the Pig talisman before the big

mouth finds it! [after Jackie, Uncle, and Jade find the Pig talisman] Hak Foo: Many thanks for leading us to the prize. Uncle: You are not welcome. Jade: Three against one, we can take him! Jackie: Jade, the talisman! Jade: Oh, right! [Jade runs to get the talisman] Hak Foo (to Tohru): You, Family-Size! Stop the girl, sit on her, do something! [after Hak Foo uses the Pig talisman to fire heat beams from his eyes] Jackie (realizing): The lucky pig was how Grandpapa Ferkel melted his cocoa beans! [Uncle looks confused] Hak Foo (after discovering the Pig's magic): Heat beam eye blasts! Heat beam eye blasts! [after falling from the clock tower] Jackie: Uncle, explain. Uncle: Jackie, thank you for allowing me to re-experience my youth. [Uncle hands back the Dog talisman] But being young is too dangerous! And exhausting! Uncle needs a nap! Jade: You earned it, Uncle! Jackie: See, Jade? As Tohru demonstrated, one cannot turn back the hands of time!

"Snake Hunt" Tohru: Chan! Finn: We really have to stop using the same travel agent! Jade: The Dark Hand! Wesley Rank: More archaeologists? Dino Stefansson: Quite popular secret site! Jade: Jackie's totally ready to host his own show! Educational, but with an actionadventure slant. We're thinking of calling it Jackie Chan Can! And I'm his plucky co-host! Rank: Just the Artifacts has the exclusive scoop on the infamous Snake talisman! Whatever that is! Dino: Huh, maybe we should ask an archaelogist. Rank: I am an archaeologist! Dino: Oh, yeah, destroying 4000 year-old drawings, right, that's what archaologists do... Rank: Pipe down, you! Tohru (to Valmont): Rest assured, master. We will find your talisman. And I will break Jackie Chan! Rank: Aw crikey! Jade (running off): Sorry we didn't rewind thank you! Jackie: A snake biting its tail... that's a symbol of the circle of the life. The end is in the beginning! The drawing was a map, telling us the talisman is at the cave, where we began! Jackie: Bad snake bad snake bad snake! Jade: Liar liar liar! [hits Rank in the stomach]

Rank: Ow, that hurt! [pause] Edit that out. Rank: Everything alright? Dino: Maybe a sprain... Rank: I meant the camera! [Giant snake appears] Jade: Senor Gigante, I presume? Jackie: The snake talisman is gone! But how? [flashback] Rank! Jade: What a snake! "The Tiger and the Pussycat" Jackie: The Tiger talisman is inside one of these pies. Jade: Piece of cake! Er... pie. We just join the contest and eat til we find it. And the beauty is... Mr. Green-jeans is our only competition! [Tohru arrives] Jackie: Er... was! Jade: Maybe Tohru didn't leave room for desert! Shendu: After nine centuries, all twelve talismans have been recovered... yet I possess only two, while Jackie Chan has ten! You have failed me, Valmont. Valmont: Now, Shendu, just because Chan's locked them away in Section 13 doesn't mean we won't find-Shendu: The New Year approaches! It is essential that I have all twelve talismans before then... if you ever wish to lay eyes upon the Treasure of Qin Shi Huang. Valmont: Tohru! Bring me Jackie Chan! He will surrender the location of Section 13..[unsheathes his sword cane]...with proper prodding! Uncle: Hot-cha! Jackie, the Tiger talisman possesses the power of balance! [Jade snatches the talisman and jumps on top of a stack of book] Jade: Cool! So whoever has it can't lose their-[Jade loses her balance and falls into Jackie's arms] Jackie: The kind of balance that your parents in Hong Kong sent you here to learn. Uncle: Within each of us lies conflicting forces -- yin and yang, light and dark, good and evil... Jade: Like Jackie has a dark side! Jackie: I do! Her name is Jade! Jade: Balance? That's not even a real power! Jackie: Good! I will enjoy taking this powerless talisman back to Section 13 so we can put this quest to rest. [after seeing the two Jackies] Uncle: Hmm, when the talisman broke, Jackie's yin was separated from his yang. Jade: Whoa! Jackie Light, and Jackie Dark. Jackie Light: I am the dark side! I murdered a bug! Jade: You're the side that ate my candy? You're evil! Evil! Uncle: Not 'evil', just lacking sound judgment, without his good side to guide him. [Jade is looking out the window] Jade: Uhh, Jackies? Jackie Light (frightened): The Dark Hand! Jackie Dark (excited): The Dark Hand! Uncle: Hide the talisman! Jade: What are we gonna do? Jackie Dark: Laugh like circus clowns while they scream for mercy.

Jackie Light: Run! Tohru: Chan, you're coming with-[Jackie Dark dropkicks him] Finn: Hey! You didn't let him finish! Jackie Light: Fighting is not nice! Ratso: Get him! [after getting thrown out by Jackie Dark] Finn: Seem like Chan's in a particularly bad mood today. Chow: You mean the psycho? He copped my jacket! Finn: Who cares? Look what I copped. [holds up half of the Tiger talisman] [while watching Jackie in the rearview mirror] Finn: Ha. He'll never catch us! Chow: Weren't we supposed to catch him? Finn: ...shut up. [after capturing Jackie Dark] Valmont: Half a talisman? It's a start, I suppose... now tell me the location of Section 13 or-[cell-phone rings] Valmont: What is it? Ratso (on vidphone): We got Chan! Valmont: I know. He's right here. Jackie Light (on vidphone): He is? Ratso: No he's not! He's right here! Jackie Light (to Valmont, on vidphone): Hello! How are you? [later] Shendu: The Tiger talisman is the glue that binds the conflicting powers of all the other talismans into one unified whole. If it was divided by Chan, it is likely that Chan himself was divided, into light... and dark. Valmont: So which Chan do we have? [Jackie Dark is laughing with Finn and Chow] Jackie Dark: And when the fish hit the road, you guys all went 'bwahhh!' [Enforcers laugh] Finn: You know, Chan, you're all right! Chow: Yeah, too bad we gotta eliminate ya! Valmont: Perhaps there's another option. Bring the talismans from Section 13, and I will make you rich. Jackie Dark: Works for me. Jackie Light: Brother! You're okay! [spots the tackle box] Ooh, are you going fishing? Jackie Dark: Went. Talisman fishing. Jackie Light: Oh! You're a bad boy! Jackie Light: And you're ugly! Now where's the other half of the talisman? Jade: Wait! You can't do this! If the Dark Hand gets all the talismans, then something... really, really bad is going to happen! Jackie Dark: So? Jade: But you're not evil, remember? Uncle said everyone has yin and yang! You can't be all yang! Jackie Dark (dismissively): Yang dang doodle dooby-dooby doo. [walks away] [Jackie Light kicks Jackie Dark to stop him from kicking Jade] Jackie Light: It's not nice to dropkick little girls!

Jade: See? If he has a fighting side, then you have to have a nice guy side! Jackie Dark: Once I give these to Valmont, I'll have a rich guy side! Valmont (on the phone): Any sign of Chan? Tohru: No. Valmont: Then get off your tremendous behind! I want those talismans! Tohru (angrily): Yes, Master. [crushes phone] [Tohru kidnaps Jade and drives away] Jade: Help! Jackie! Jackie Light: Jade! Jackie Dark: Too bad, I kind of liked her. She's scrappy. Jackie Light: Oh, she's family! We have to save her! Jackie Dark: We do? Jackie Light: Uh... you get to fight more bad guys! [at Dark Hand headquarters] Valmont (counting the talismans): Eight... nine... ten... and eleven... Shendu: Yes... I can feel my power returning! Jade: The statue talked? You guys are working for a statue? Tohru: Quiet! Valmont (still counting): Eleven-and-a-half... [looks to Tohru] Tohru: What? Valmont, Shendu: Where is the other half? [when the Shadowkhan appear] Jackie Dark: Come on down! Jackie Light: Can't we get along? [after Valmont takes the last half of the talisman] Jade: Stop him! He has all twelve! Jackies: Stop! [Valmont puts the second half into Shendu; the two Jackies become one] Valmont: Game over, Chan! Way over! [Shendu returns to life] Shendu: I live!

"Day of the Dragon" [Shendu is revived] Shendu: At long last. My powers restored! Speed! Invisibility! Astral projection! Jade: That thing's why Valmont wanted the talismans? Shendu: And my personal favorite: combustion! [throws a huge fireball at Jackie] Finn: Whoa, Shen-dude. Ratso: Uh, welcome to Earth? Chow: Good to see ya up and around. Valmont: Well, the office is a-shambles, but the lost treasure of Qin Shi Huang should more than cover the cleaning deposit. Shendu: Regrettably, Valmont, you did not provide me with the talismans. Jackie Chan did. Valmont: A technicality-Shendu: Read my lips! No treasure for you. Valmont: Tohru, make this deadbeat pony up.

Finn: You go, bro. Ratso: We're right behind you. Chow: In spirit! Tohru: But master... Valmont: Do it! [Tohru attacks Shendu] Shendu: Need I remind you that I possess the power of levitation... and super-strength? [knocks Tohru out of the building] Valmont: Ugh. Fine. Treasure's yours! [in the elevator] Ratso: Too bad about the Lost Treasure of... you know, what-you-call-it. Finn: Uh, will this affect our bonuses? Ratso: You get a bonus? Valmont: Shut up! Jackie: Who--what are you? Shendu: I am the keeper of the talismans. I am the Apocalypse of which legend speaks. And I am, for once and for all, your executioner! [seeing Shendu fly off] Captain Black (weakly): Jade. Please explain. Jade: I think it used the power of the levitation talisman combined with the speed talisman so it could fly. Captain Black: What? What did all that so it could fly? Jade: Got me. But it used to be a statue! Uncle: Did the demon have any specific markings? Captain Black: Red eyes, great big claws, and razor-sharp teeth isn't specific enough for you? Uncle: Thousands of demon sorcerers have existed throughout history. I need more information! A symbol! A name! Anything! Tohru: Chan! Jackie: Go away! We have no more talismans! Tohru: The demon's name: Shendu! Uncle: Shendu was evil warlord of a vast kingdom. He was imprisoned by his subjects, and the twelve talismans from which he drew his powers were scattered to the winds. He vowed to return one day not only to resurrect his palace but to conjure dragon minions to wreak his vengeance upon the descendants of those who rebelled against him, by destroying all of Asia! Uncle: I will come. Tohru: I will come too. Jackie: Um, that's okay! Captain Black: Tohru, why help us? Tohru: I am told that Section 13 serves doughnuts on Thursdays. [Valmont begins removing one of his teeth] Ratso: Whoa! Finn: Big V.. w-what are you doing? Valmont: Raising cane. [his cane flies towards their prison cell] [Section 13 agent is banging on the bathroom door] Uncle: Go away! I am busy! Agent: Uhh, you've been in the lavatory since take off. Uncle: That is right! Laboratory! Do you want Jackie to defeat the evil demon? Yes? Then go

away! Let Uncle work! [Shendu is tearing open a portal in space] Jackie: What is Shendu doing, Uncle? Uncle (whispering): Releasing his dragon minions! Captain Black: Let's turn up the heat. Uncle: No! Shendu is immortal! Magic must defeat magic! Captain Black: Men! [Men lower their weapons] Uncle: Jackie, this balm will allow you to penetrate Shendu's demon shell and remove the talismans. Jackie: Remove? All twelve? Uncle: Not if you are cunning like Jade. Certain talismans offer Shendu not firepower but sustenance. For example, without the reanimation that the Rat talisman provides, Shendu would revert back to being a statue. [seeing Jackie] Shendu: How many lives do you possess? [after removing the Sheep talisman from Shendu] Jackie: Sheep, sheep, sheep, which power was that? [he activates it; his astral form projects from his body] Huh? Oh! The astral projection talisman! Of all the useless... what am I supposed to do with that? Captain Black (about Jackie): He's out cold! Men! [Men raise their weapons] Uncle: Ai-yah! Magic must defeat magic! [Men lower their weapons] [Shendu's chest heals itself up after Jackie blasts it with the Dragon talisman] Shendu: You cannot harm me, Chan! The Horse is the healer! [Shendu slams Jackie at super speed, knocking him into a wall] Jackie (dazed): And the Rabbit is speed... Captain Black: That tears it! Men! [Uncle knocks Captain Black out] Uncle: Who else wants a piece of Uncle? [Men lower their weapons] Jade: It's the Chinese zodiac hit parade! [after finding the treasure of Qin Shi Huang] Valmont (to the Enforcers): At last! Well, boys, let's dig in! [Jackie and Shendu are grappling] Jackie: The playing field is almost even, Shendu! Shendu: You may have the Ox, but relative to me, all that makes you is a very strong mouse! Jade: No! Mom and Dad -- all of Asia -- are counting on you! [sees the potion] And me! [Shendu is about to feed Jackie to the dragon minions in the portal] Shendu: Pity you will not live to witness my reign over your world... but you shall be the first to visit theirs! [Jade pulls a talisman from Shendu's back] Jade: Little Jade Horner pulled out a Dog!

[Jackie pulls the Rat talisman from Shendu] Jackie: Rat! Shendu: Nooooo! [Shendu reverts to being a statue] Uncle: See? What have we learned? Agents (in unison): 'Magic must defeat magic'. Shendu: I will have my revenge, if it takes another nine hundred years. Jade: Tch. No Rat means you're just a statue. And no Dog means you're not immortal! [Jade blasts Shendu with the Dragon talisman] Jackie: Happy New Year, Jade. Happy New Year, Uncle. Uncle: You destroyed the demon! Yin and Yang... now the world is out of balance! Nobody told you to destroy the demon! Jackie: ...Jade did it! Uncle: Now, there is a void for a new, stronger evil to fill! Finn: I know how much the treasure meant to you, Big V. [spots the talismans] But how about a consolation prize? Jackie: You should visit your parents. Jade: They... might want me to stay with them. Jackie: Would that be so awful? Jade: Tch. For you.

"The J Team" Valmont: It would seem we have lost the Lost Treasure of Ching Shui Han. On the bright side, however, Jackie Chan has done me a tremendous favor by eliminating my albatross. Ratso: Albatross? I thought Shendu was a dragon. [Valmont lays out the talismans] Valmont: ...which means we now have exclusive access to some very potent magic! Uncle: Jackie! Jackie: Uncle! We're moving back in! Uncle: You cannot move back! Jackie: Why not? Uncle: Where would Tohru sleep? Jade: Heh, you've been jacked! Shendu: Once I make Jackie Chan pay, I shall tear that buffoon Valmont to pieces! Dai Gui: SILENCE! The only future you have is here with us, brother! Xiao Fung: Indeed! Let the eternal torment begin. Shendu (startled): Torment? Eternal? Tso Lan: The punishment for betrayal, Shendu. You chose to spend your time ruling China... Bai Tza: ...while we withered this bone-dry pit... Hsi Wu: ...bored out of our wits, all those centuries, each exactly like the one before it! Po Kong: You never even attempted to free us! Shendu: I--your rescue was in the planning stages! But I became imprisoned in a statue-Tchang Zu: Excuses! Shendu: Aah! Tchang Zu: You desired the earthly realm for you alone. Shendu: Aaah!

Hsi Wu: A shame you never learned to share, brother! Shendu: No, wait! I can free you! Bai Tza: Do not toy with us! The doors can only be opened from the other side. Dai Gui: The human side! Shendu: Precisely. As the... humble spirit you now see before you, I am free to cross over and possess any human you wish, enabling me to undo the sacred spells that keep you here... if you so deem it... [Valmont is distributing the talismans to his men] Valmont: Twelve talismans, four Enforcers... three each. Ratso: Uh, boss? There's only three of us since Tohru cashed in his frequent-flyer miles. Finn:: So, I'll just hang onto these-[Hak Foo snatches up three of the talismans] Hak Foo: Hungry crane spears fish! Valmont: Everyone remembers Hak Foo? Ratso: Hiya, Hak. Chow: Or do you prefer 'Foo'? Valmont: Master Foo. The Black Tiger shall be your new lieutenant. Jackie: Jade, you should never play with things you don't know how to work. Jade: I didn't know I didn't know! Now I do! Jackie: Perhaps now you know why we have to leave Section 13. Jade: But Tohru will have nowhere to sleep! Jackie: I found a very charming apartment for us. They allow children or pets, but not secret agents, Dark Hand thugs, or magical talismans! Captain Black: Jackie! Robbery in progress -- financial district! It's the Dark Hand? Jackie: Uh... good luck with that? Captain Black: They're packing heat. Talisman heat! Finn: Astral projection? Motion to the motionless? Yin/Yang? How come I get all the loser powers? Officer: Freeze! Hak Foo: Mule kick! [kicks the officer aside] Finn: No fair! You're not even using yours! Hak Foo: The Horse for healing? I am not easily injured. The Rooster for levitation? I already fly. The Dog for immortality? There is not a man alive who can vanquish me! Finn: That's cool! Trade ya? Hak Foo: [pause, tosses him the talismans] Baby. Ratso: Ha ha, we're like superheroes! Who steal stuff! Captain Black: Freeze! Step away from the vehicle! [about his talismans] Finn: Immortality and healing? That's redundant! Shendu: So, I trust you'll agree that my... er... martyrdom has left a void for a new, stronger evil to fill. Namely you, my brothers and sisters. Shall I... proceed then? [the other sorcerers blast Shendu] Shendu: Ah! What trick is this? Hsi Wu: You have proven crafty, brother, so we require a safety measure! Bai Tza: Our spell will keep you bound within the human of your choosing until you release us. Xiao Fung: A precaution: so that we know exactly where to find you... Tso Lan: ...should we deem it necessary to resume your eternal torment.

Shendu: I accept your terms. I will choose my vessel well, to best serve you. The human most capable for this task is my nemesis: Jackie Chan! Captain Black: All agents, fall back! Repeat, fall back! Jackie: One last time... [Jackie runs after the Dark Hand] Captain Black: Jackie, I said 'fall back'. That means you too! Jackie: I'm not an agent! [Finn slams into a bridge overpass] Finn: Ugh, immortality hurts! Valmont: What is taking you so long? Ratso: Uh... flat tire? Shendu (possessing Valmont): We have more important matters to attend to! Get in! Ratso: We'll just grab the loot and-Shendu: No loot! Get in now! Valmont (reasserting control): Why are you standing there? Collect the cash! Ratso: But you said... Valmont: Are you questioning me? Shendu: Where are you going? Come here, or I shall destroy you all! [Enforcers look confused] Finn: We must've left millions on that beach! What is the deal, Big V-[Shendu shoves him] Shendu: Valmont cannot hear you! Chow: Uh-oh. Finn: Shendu? Ratso: He's ba-a-ck! Chow: Your talismans, Mr. Shendu. Ratso: We was takin' care of 'em for you! [The Enforcers lay down the talismans and try to leave] Shendu: Keep your talismans. They no longer matter to me. [Valmont reasserts control] Valmont: Ugh, how did I-- where is the money? Finn: Uhh, Big V? Shendu's back! Valmont: What? Where? Ratso: Inside you! Valmont: That's preposter-[He sees his reflection; Shendu's face appears above his own] Valmont: Ahh! Dah! Get out! Shendu: Trust me, Valmont, the feeling is mutual. But for now, you and your thugs will assist me or perish! Tohru: [sees Valmont in the door way] Master? [sees Uncle's body] Sensei? [pause] I will show you the door! [Shendu blasts Tohru unconscious] [on the roof] Captain Black: He's gone... Jackie: Why did he take one of Uncle's books? [Shadowkhan appear] Jackie: But I don't understand. Valmont can't summon the Shadowkhan. Only Shendu... Shendu: Reports of my demise... have been greatly exaggerated, Chan. Captain Black: Whoa.

Shendu: Destroy them! Chow -- Ox Ratso -- Snake, Pig Hak Foo -- Horse, Rooster, Dog Finn -"J Team 2" [Jackie and Captain Black are surrounded by hundreds of Shadowkhan] Captain Black: I'll take the guy in the ninja suit. Captain Black: Whoa! Unc, that was some magic! Uncle: Eh, simple chi spell. Many others in my book. Jade: So the big bad dragon's back, and he's packing the talismans? Uncle: Talismans are not important! Shendu is a spirit now; not even the talismans can change that. Captain Black: So you figure he's onto something bigger, mi compadre? Uncle: The book that Shendu stole from my library is a key to understanding his motives. Tohru: But... which volume did he take? Uncle: How do I know! We must take inventory! Uncle: Go away! We are closed for inventory! El Toro: We are not customers. Uncle: Jackie! A burglar! Jackie: Uncle, he is no thief! He is-Uncle: Of course he is a thief! He is wearing a mask! Paco: Oh no no no, El Toro Fuerte never removes his mask. [El Toro and Tohru are wrestling and breaking everything] Viper: I've heard of a bull in a China shop, Jackie, but two? Jackie: Viper? [grabs her arm] No thieves allowed in Uncle's store! Uncle: How can she be the thief? She is not wearing a mask and wrecking my store! Jade: Alright! Viper! El Toro! You made it! [spots Paco] Who invited you? Jackie: I'm sorry you all came here for nothing, but I didn't realize my niece read so many comic books. I cannot accept your help. Viper: Never pegged you as the macho type, Jackie. Jackie: I especially cannot accept help from a super thief! Viper: Ex-super thief. Went legit after the Pink Puma fiasco. Shendu: Ah, the Pan Ku Box... soon my demon brethren will be free, and their new reign of terror will begin! Jade: Okay, team, let's move out! Jackie: Jade, there is no team! Jade: Oh? These J-Team jackets say you're wrong! Uncle: Tohru! Tend the shop and watch Jade. The rest of you? Get out! [Valmont and Shendu are fighting inside of Valmont's body] Valmont: It's my body, and I say we're going home? Shendu: You dare defy me? Valmont: Ahh, my hair! Shendu: You will suffer for--aahh! Valmont: Get out of my head! Shendu: You mortal--!

Ratso: So... uh... who're we rooting for? [Tohru bursts into the room] Finn: Tohru, buddy! Ratso: You're alive! Tohru: Good to see you. [slams them against the wall] Chow: Tohru's a traitor! Finn: Then give him a taste of talisman! [nothing happens] Finn: Huh? Our powers! Chow: My pants! [after the Dark Hand escapes] Jackie: Look what you did! Viper: Hey, it's not my fault you're not a team player. Tohru: We only wished to help. El Toro: And without us, you would have been pulverized. Jackie: I was pulverized! And the Dark Hand still has all the talismans! Uncle: I told you, talismans are not important! El Toro: Of course talismans are important. Uncle: Talismans are not important! El Toro: Talismans are very important! Uncle: Not important. El Toro: Very important! Uncle: Not important! El Toro: Very important! Jackie: It's your fault we lost the talismans! Viper: No, it's your fault! Paco: The grown-ups are starting to sound like us! Jade: And we don't have time for kid's stuff! Come on, we gotta follow Shendu! El Toro: Muy importante! Shendu: Ah, the Pan Ku Box. Okay, take it. Finn: Uhh, why don't you take it? Shendu: I cannot touch it! It is forged of good magic, and I, most decidedly, am not. Ratso: Invisibility and speed! I'll kick your butt in fast forward! [charges at El Toro, but slams into the wall] Ratso: Ugh! Gotta work on my aim... Hak Foo: Mad monkey kung fu! Octopus fist of fury! Shredding lion claws! Minnow wallops whale! Tohru: I'm sorry, what was that last part? Hak Foo: I said, minnow-[Tohru body slams him] Hak Foo: Hmph! 'What was that last part'? [Chow misses Viper with his heat beams several times] Viper: I'm going out on a limb here, but it looks like you need contacts. Chow: ...maybe... [Hak Foo is holding the Tiger talisman] Hak Foo: Yin-yang, the power of balance! You will be unable to knock me-[Tohru knocks him over] Tohru: Spiritual balance, Hak Fool.

[after Dark Hand is defeated] Jackie: We have all twelve talismans! Uncle: Talismans are not important! The inscriptions are! [translating] Shendu was one of eight demon sorcerers who terrorized the ancient world, each with his or her own magic derived from fire, sky, moon, thunder, earth, mountain, wind, and water. One by one, the demons were defeated by the Eight Immortals, legendary heroes of ancient China. The Immortals used powerful chi spells to banish the demons to another realm, each demon behind its own portal. The only thing that could locate and unlock those portals is the Pan Ku Box itself. So, it is a very good thing that Shendu did not-Jade: Shendu's gone and he took the Pan Ku Box! Uncle: Ai-YAH! Uncle: We cannot accept help from a thief! El Toro: I am the wrestler, she is the thief. Viper: Ex-thief. Don't worry, handsome; th-e next time Jackie's in a pinch, Jade knows who to call. Paco: Well, Jade, El Toro may be the best-Jade: And Jackie may be better-Both: But the J-Team is the greatest! Finn - Sheep, Rat, Tiger (switch with Hak Foo) Chow - Ox, Monkey, Dragon Ratso - Pig, Snake, Rabbit Hak Foo - Dog, Rooster, Horse (switch with Finn) "Jade x Jade" [Ratso tries to drill through the Pan Ku Box but fails] Finn: Whoa! Not even a scratch, Big V--I mean, er... Shendu, sir. Shendu: Try harder. The Pan Ku Box must be opened! [Hak Foo tries to smash the Box with his forehead but fails] Hak Foo: Charging rhino cracks walnut! [Chow picks up the Box and strokes it] Chow: Uh... open sesame? Valmont: What an absurd waste of time! Cheerio! [tries to leave] Shendu (taking over): Need I remind you, Valmont, that is I who holds controlling interest in this partnership? The sooner we find the portals and release my demon brethren, the sooner you will have your pathetic body back! [Valmont grabs the Box -- it electrocutes him] Valmont: Gaah! Go! Open already! Aah! Shendu: Remember, I cannot touch good magic! [Valmont kicks the Box against the wall -- it opens] Finn: Uh, Shen-dude? Ratso: Hey, it ain't no box -- it's a puzzle! [the Box projects an image against the wall] Shendu: Ah, a map to the first portal! Chow: Uh, it says that we gotta find... (translating) 'that which runs but never walks, to the mouth which never talks'. Ratso: A puzzle with a riddle! Shendu: At last, the demon sorcerers will return, and walk the Earth, casting their shadow upon all humans! [Pan Ku Box deactivates] Valmont: Tell me someone wrote that down? Anyone? Jackie: Uncle, please! Slow down!

Jade: You so need to chill! Uncle: If I 'chill', demons will be dancing upon all our graves! I must research the proper chi spells to seal the seven portals! All required ingredients must be on hand and ready! Jackie: Uncle, at least let me help! Uncle (screaming): What do you know about magic? I was apprentice to Chi Master Fong for fifteen years! [Tohru's ladder breaks and he falls onto Uncle] Uncle (weakly): Perhaps it is time for me to train an apprentice of my own... [Jade gasps] Uncle: Someone of sound judgment, who I can trust with my chi knowledge... Jade: Me, me, me! I'll put some pocus in your hocus! Uncle: Tohru! Tohru, Jade: Huh!? [Ratso struggles with the Box] Ratso: It won't budge! Shendu: Clearly the Box's way of telling us we must find the first portal before proceeding to the next. [Hak Foo enters with a globe] Shendu: Well, if our recollections of the directions are accurate, the portal which imprisons Po Kong, the Mountain Demon, will be found in what is now Tokyo, Japan... [Tohru is sleeping with a book] Jade: Hey, T, what are you working on? (reading) 'Duplication spell for beginners'. Huh... Jade (about a vase): Uncle always says this is his most valuable vase. Time to double his money! [Jade uses the powder to duplicate the vase once] Jade: Whoa! Uncle is going to beg me to be his apprentice! [Jackie enters] Jackie: Uncle! Uncle! Uncle! Pack your things! [Uncle enters] Jackie: Captain Black just informed me that Shendu is heading for Tokyo! Uncle: Do not move. Jackie: What? What is it? [Uncle whacks him] Uncle: Do you expect me to seal the demon portal with salt and pepper? No? Then you go to Tokyo and find out which demon we are dealing with so that I can research a proper chi spell! Good night. Jade: Sounds you could use my help, Jackie-O. And I've never been Tokyo-Jackie: Jade, it's a school night. Jade: Aww! Jackie: Now promise me you will stay here and do your homework. Jade: Promise. [Jackie leaves] [Jade walks past a mirror and gets an idea] Jade: I can do my homework and go with Jackie! [she uses the chi spell to duplicate herself] Jade, Jade Duplicate: Whoa, freaky! Jinx! [they both laugh] [in Tokyo] Shendu: The map indicated that we proceed 300 paces southeast from the cherry blossom grove, where we will follow 'that which runs but never walks, to the mouth which never talks'. Chow: I don't see any cherry blossoms... Valmont (dryly): That wretched box is thousands of years old, there have clearly been some

developments in the landscape since then. Ratso: Ooh, ooh, lookie, lookie, lookie, lookie! [Ratso indicates a giant cartoon electric billboard] Finn: No, Ratso, you can't have one! Ratso: Don't you see? It runs... on batteries, but doesn't walk. It's got a mouth... no way it talks! Valmont: I suppose it's worth a look... [they walk away; Jackie steps out from behind a newspaper stand] Jackie: 'That which runs, but never walks...' [Jade and Jade 2 are on a roof in Tokyo] Jade: You can tag along, but no more surprises, capisce? [Jade 2 generates another Jade duplicate] Jade 2: Uh... surprise? [Jackie has been cornered with the Pan Ku Box] Jade: I'm open! Jackie: Jade, what are you doing--oh, why do I even bother to ask? [he punts the Box over to Jade] [The Enforcers are chasing the three Jade copies] Ratso: I got her! Chow: No, I got her! Finn: What do you mean? I got her... but she don't got the Box! [after Jackie falls off the billboard] Jade: Jackie, are you okay? Jackie: Ohh. [lifts his shirt, revealing an imprint of the trigram of the Box] I landed on the Box. Jade: Ooh, belly flop! Uncle: A full line atop two broken lines... Jackie, that is a trigram of the Mountain Demon! I will gather chi ingredients and come at once! Tohru: Allow me to assist you, sensei! Uncle: Why? You are a lousy apprentice! [Uncle gestures at the hundreds of vase duplicates in the room] Tohru: But I did not cast the duplicator spell. Uncle: Bah. If you did not, then who did? [Uncle gasps in realization] Jade (to all of the Jade duplicates): Can't you guys just pull yourselves together? Jade Duplicate: Don't look at us, Copperfield Jade Duplicate 2: You're the one who cast the spell! Jackie (from the bathroom): Jade. Have you been contemplating the riddle? Jade: Sure! What riddle was that, Uncle Jackie? Jackie: The riddle we must solve before Shendu does! 'Runs but never walks, a mouth that never talks'. [Jackie looks out the hotel window] Jackie: Ah! Jade, you are a genius! A river runs but never walks, has a mouth which never talks! The Tsumia River must lead to the portal! [Jade duplicates in front of her] Jade: Jackie, don't worry, I can explain everything! [a dozen Jade duplicates fall out of the closet] Jades: Hi Jackie! [Jackie sighs] [after Jackie finds the portal location]

Shendu: Many thanks for leading us here, Chan! Ratso: So, how're we going to open the portal? [The Pan Ku Box activates, opening the portal] Ratso: Whoa. Shendu: Behold, the triumphant return of my sister: Po Kong, the Mountain Demon! Ratso (whispering): Must be his big sister. Po Kong: Enough fanfare! What's for supper? Shendu: Chan! Bon appetit. [Jackie is about to get eaten by Po Kong] Jade: Hey, Big Bertha! It's not polite to play with your food! Po Kong: Hmph, another tiny portion? [the army of Jades appear in front of Po Kong] Shendu, Enforcers: Whoa. Jackie: Jades! Po Kong: Finger food! Jades: You mean... knuckle sandwich! [They punch her all at once] Uncle: Now, drum! Tohru: Uh, 'drum'? Uncle: The symbol of the Immortal who originally imprisoned Po Kong! Tohru: I... thought you had it! Uncle: Ai-yah! What kind of apprentice are you? Tohru (sheepishly): A lousy one? Jackie: Uncle! The Pan Ku Box! Uncle: I think there is a bigger problem to solve. [Uncle indicates the army of Jades] Uncle: I must do research... Tohru: No need, Sensei. I believe no finishing charm was applied to the original duplication spell. That is why it continues to repeat. [Uncle gasps] Tohru (sheepishly): Uh, I did some reading on the long flight... Uncle: Tohru will be a good apprentice! Jackie: Did you bring the finishing charm? Tohru: Uh-huh. But it will only work on the original Jade. Jackie: Jade! [all the Jades clamor at once] Jackie: Gah! [pause] Okay, whoever cast the spell in the first place is grounded, with no TV for a year! [all the Jades point to the original] Jade: Tch. Tattletales! "Rumble in the Big House" Shendu: The portal of Xiao Fung the Wind Demon lies on the southern land mass, four million and one cubits above the southern hemisphere, beyond the blasted forest, nestled between the rolling hills. Ratso: Uh, the only thing I see nestling... Finn: ...is Hollowlands Penitentiary! Valmont: You mean to tell us that the demon portal lies within those prison walls, Shendu? Shendu: Do not take that tone with me, Valmont! I did not build the fortress! Ratso: I've heard of busting out of jail, but breaking in? Finn: No problem -- I did a stretch here. Rumor has it there are miles of tunnels under the joint. Shendu: The Pan Ku Box mentioned no tunnels, and I will not waste time chasing windmills

when we can simply allow ourselves to be taken prisoner! Ratso: Oh no! Finn: I don't wanna go back! Captain Black: Valmont and his pals have been spotted downtown. You in, Jackie? Jade: We're there! Jackie: Is your name Jackie? [Jade growls] Captain Black, I thought all Dark Hand matters had been reassigned to Section 12! Captain Black: That may be so, but I'm not going to sit pretty while the Dark Hand strolls into my backyard and hands a hall pass to a hobgoblin! [Captain Black storms off] Jade: Captain Black is in the house! [Valmont fights to avoid getting out of his car] Valmont: As the head of an international crime syndicate, I refuse to expose myself by robbing a common bank! Shendu (asserting control): You seem to forget, Valmont, that in the event of a stalemate -- I win! Captain Black: Freeze, Valmont! Valmont, Ratso, Finn (dully): We surrender. Captain Black: You do? [pause] Take them away! Judge: And for your long career of federal crimes, I sentence you to fifty years in Hollowlands Maximum Security Prison. [Finn bursts into tears] Captain Black (on the phone): Yes, the Dark Hand has been successfully shut down, sir, but--thank you, we are proud, sir, but I want to recommend that Valmont be reassigned to another prison immediately. I have reason to believe he orchestrated their appointment to Hollowland in order to locate a demon portal... [pause] No, sir, I've never received psychological counseling. Why? Jackie: They didn't believe you, did they? Captain Black: And if we can't stop the demon by moving Valmont out, we are going to have to move in. Jackie: ...you don't really mean 'we', do you? Captain Black: You in? Jade: Cool! You're going undercover! Jackie: But I don't want to be a prison guard! Captain Black: Not a guard, Jackie -- an inmate. Captain Black: Don't worry. All you have to do is fix your way into Valmont's gang, and get ahold of that Pan Ku Box before they open the portal with it. Jackie (sarcastically): Oh, is that all? [after Captain Black and Kepler disguise Jackie and show him a mirror] Kelper: Say 'ah'! [Jackie screams] Captain Black: Jackie Chan, meet 'Chance Jackson', master criminal. Valmont: We can't find the portal until the Pan Ku Box arrives, so we will just have to wait. Finn: Well, we could have been traipsing our way out through those tunnels with our 'demon-ofthe-week' by now! Valmont: Alleged tunnels. Finn: Anything's better than doing time! Right, Ratso? Ratso (holding a baseball glove): Come on, let's toss a few before lunch! They're serving gruel

again! [Valmont and Finn glare at him] Ratso: What? It's fun food! [Jackie bumps into another inmate] Jackie (as Chance Jackson): Ooh, sorry! [gruff voice] Er... sorry I didn't rearrange your molecules! Watch where you're goin' next time! Chance: So, uh, what're you in for? Valmont: Go away! Chance: Chance Jackson, safe-cracker. Finn: Big whoop. Chance: I crack them with my head! [pause] So, uh, you like baseball? Ratso: Oh, do I? Ratso: Aw, you guys oughta give Chance a chance! He's one of us! Probably why he reminds me of some body... Finn: Whoa, we struck demon! Xiao Fung: Not any demon! Xiao Fung, Demon of the Wind! Ratso: Uh, like breakin' wind? Xiao Fung: Like breaking bones! Xiao Fung: Ahh, the sweet scent of freedom! Finn: Uh, actually, Your Breeziness, sir? You're not exactly free. Xiao Fung: No? Ratso: You're in the hoosegow! Finn: Prison! Xiao Fung: This 'prison' is paradise compared to the ghastly abyss I've escaped. Finn: Whatever you say, chief, but outside's even better! Beaches, movies... Ratso: Yeah, so why don't you huff and puff and blow the big house down! Chance: No! I--I mean, you can't leave without your boss, can you? Xiao Fung: Where is Shendu? Ratso: Shendu's in Valmont. Finn: And Valmont's in solitary. Xiao Fung: Hmm, if I do not free this Valmont, I will be burdened with freeing my brothers and sisters. Very well. [changes into a human] Finn: Whoa, you guys can do that? Xiao Fung: Concealment seems prudent. Demons appear to stick out like sore thumbs in this modern world... [Captain Black is taking an ink blot test] Captain Black: Demon. I see a demon. Therapist: And this one? Captain Black: Socks. Worn by a really big demon. [after Uncle hangs up on Jackie] Jade: Who was that, Uncle? \Uncle: Eh, crank call. Jade: Prince Albert in a can? Uncle: No. Crazy talk about demons and prisons. [Jade gasps] Uncle: Ai-YAH! Ratso: We're going to create a diversion so we can sneak into solitary?

Chance: What's the plan? [Finn throws a bowl of food into his face] Finn, Ratso: Food fight! [a food fight ensues; during the struggle, some men grab Chance and pull off his mask] Ratso: Psst! Chance, let's break for it! Chance: So, we goin' or what? [Ratso gasps and picks up the mask] Ratso (heartbroken): I liked you! Finn: Hey, Xiao, meet Jackie Chan! Xiao Fung: Nemesis to my brethren? [Jackie suddenly vanishes] Finn: ...what just happened here? Xiao Fung: Never mind! Solitary! [after finding the tunnels] Finn: See, I knew there were tunnels! [while wandering the tunnels] Finn: Way out's gotta be that way! Ratso: Awh, we just came from there! Xiao Fung: Shendu, I have had enough of your lost expedition! Valmont (nervously): Shendu, your brother is speaking to you! Xiao Fung: So good to see you again! In fact... [transforms back into demon form] I'M ALL ABLUSTER! Uncle (to Xiao Fung): You are going to be sorry! [begins casting the spell] Shendu: Xiao Fung! The chi spell will seal your doom! Xiao Fung: One cannot cast what one cannot catch! [Xiao Fung begins blowing as hard as he can] [while Xiao Fung blasts them with wind] Uncle: Rabbit talisman is very good, but demon breath is better! Tohru: Tohru, human wind shield! [Tohru puts his body between Xiao Fung and Uncle, shielding him] "Queen of the Shadowkhan" [after finding the Demon Archive] Jackie: Uncle said this book will help put an end to all this 'demon portal' busines. I hope Uncle is right... [a hand reaches out and grabs the book] Jackie: Aah! Shadowkhan! Finn: Chan, 12 o'clock! Grab the ladder! We're showing Chan the door! [Jackie parachutes away with the curtains] Jackie: I guess it's curtains for me... Girl: Drew got a tattoo? Jade (relaxed): Yeah, been thinking of getting one of those... Drew (sarcastically): Oh, yeah, sure, Jade, like your dig-in-the-dirt-with-tiny-brushes Uncle Jackie would ever let you get a tattoo! Jade: He would so let me, Drew! By tomorrow, I'm going to have the gnarliest tattoo in the history

of... of gnarl! Uncle: The Archive of Demon Magic is an encyclopedia of spells, written by the demon sorcerers themselves. But it may hold clues that will help defeat the demons who created it. Both of you, clear room for my new research project! Jackie, Tohru: Yes, Uncle. Jade: Hey Jackie, [quickly] how was your trip, have you lost weight. can I get a tattoo? Jackie: Hah, my trip was--a tattoo? Jade: Please, Jackie? All the kids at school are-Jackie: No. Jade: But-Jackie: No. Jade: But-Jackie: No tattoos for Jade. Period! [after spotting the Demon Archive] Jade: My tattoo doesn't have to be real. It just has to be gnarly... Valmont: I will put up with a lot, Shendu, but I draw the line at wearing a dress! Shendu: This is a sorcerer's robe! Finn: Heh! Shendu-dette! [bows] Ratso: Pretty dress! Chow: Very... becoming! Shendu: Where is my Archive? Ratso: Uh, Chan's got it. Chow: But it wasn't our fault! Finn: Yeah, that's right -- the Shadowkhan were there too! Shendu: The Shadowkhan are my puppets; they do only what I command! Are you suggesting that this is my fault? Finn: Uh-uh! Shendu: Then redeem yourselves! No doubt Chan has brought my book to his Uncle's shop. Ratso: Aw, but every time we go there we get our butts kicked! Hak Foo: You have never been there with me. [after finding the tattoo on Jade's ankle] Jackie: Jade, wash this off right now! Jade: Er... tried that... Jackie: What? It's a real tattoo! Jade: By accident! Uncle: How can you get a tattoo by acci-- [sees the tattoo] aah! [later] Uncle: This is a symbol of great evil! We must find a spell to remove it immediately! Who knows what catastrophe such a tattoo will bring? [the Enforcers burst into the shop] Ratso: Hand over the-[Hak Foo leaps over his head] Hak Foo: Angry Crow takes flight! Hak Foo: Black Tiger corners little lamb.. Jade: Help! Anybody... [Shadowkhan appear] Jade: Shadowkhan... oh no oh no oh no! [Shadowkhan beat up Hak Foo] Hak Foo: Bunny flees from vicious jackals! Aaaahhh! [runs away] Jade: I'm... still alive? Weird!

[Hak Foo is severly injured] Hak Foo: I'm telling you, it was the Shadowkhan who did this to me! Finn: Chan kicked our butts too. Chow: Yeah, you don't hear us lying about it! Shendu: Need I remind you, the Shadowkhan do only what I command! Come, minions! [lightning flashes; nothing happens] Valmont: It would seem that you have lost your touch, Shendu. Shendu: I have not lost my touch! Chan is obviously using the power of my Archive against me! I don't care how you do it, but get my book! Jade: Tch, I wish I had time for breakfast. [gargles, spits, then notices the Shadowkhan behind her] Jade: Gaa! [the Shadowkhan present her with breakfast ites] Jade: Breakfast? [realizes] Whoa, the tattoo! That's what happened last night! I called for help, and you guys came! Jade: Get ready, guys; time to prove my magic ninjas are for real! Drew: Oh yeah? Being dumb enough to get a real tattoo is one thing, but ninjas? Come on! Jade (darkly): I better show you... [the Shadowkhan reach out to grab Drew; the bell rings and the Shadowkhan vanish] Drew: Later, Ninja Girl! [he runs off] [at Uncle's shop] Uncle: Go away! Come back later! Finn (disguised): But I am a wealthy art collector! Uncle: Welcome to Uncle's Rare Finds! [below, Chow tunnels below the shop] Uncle: Were you looking for anything in particular? Finn: Oh, just some priceless artifacts for the many, many museums I owning! Uncle: Jackie, Tohru, bring tea! [holds up artifact] This one dates back to the Hong Dynasty. It is a very good piece! [Finn's fake stomach/pillow falls out] Finn: Eh... I'll let you know. [leaves] Uncle (to Jackie and Tohru): You are both very bad salesmen! Finn: Can you believe they bought my disguise? Ratso: Oh-ho, what a plan! Chow: We're geniuses! [the Enforcers notice Jade] Hak Foo: Hmm? [the Shadowkhan appear around her] Hak Foo (weakly): They're here. Jade: Give 'em a spanking! Uncle: You were too slow with the tea! Good salesmen must always-- [notices the Archive is gone] Where is the Archive! [Tohru falls into the tunnel that the Enforcers dug] [after seeing the Shadowkhan spank the Enforcers while a demonic-looking Jade watches] Jackie: Jade! Jade! [runs to her] Jade? [the Enforcers run off; the Shadowkhan surrounds Jackie] Jade: It's okay. He's one of us. [later]

Jade: See, Jackie, total control. They do what I tell them, and I only tell them to do goo. Jackie: No, Jade. Jade: Aw, why not? Jackie: Because... you're turning blue! Jade: Blue's my favorite color! Besides, we gave Tohru a chance! Jackie: Tohru is human! Now, I want you to make them go away until Uncle can find a-Uncle: Hotcha! I have found a potion that will make Jade's tattoo vanish! Jade: But I like my tattoo! You can't do this to me! Jackie: It's for your own safety, Jade. Uncle: Now sit still while I apply the potion. [Jade conjures a powerful whirlwind] Jade: Do not touch me! I am, and shall remain, Queen of the Shadowkhan! [at Section 13, Jade appears] Captain Black: Whoa, Jade, what happened to you? Jade: I've become Queen! [summons her Shadowkhan] And every Queen needs a palace! [Jackie is searching for Jade] Jackie: Jade! Jade! [phone rings] Jackie: Jade? Captain Black: Black. Jade's gone ninja. And they've taken Section 13. [Jade is struggling to translate the Archive] Jade: How can I know the secrets of the Archive if I can't understand a single stupid word of it? [to the Shadowkhan] Bring me someone who can! [later] Shendu: Are you telling me I still don't have my book back, and the child controls my minions? [Shadowkhan appear and grab Shendu] Valmont: What? Help! [the Enforcers run towards them] Shendu: No. This could work to my advantage... [goes with them willingly] [at Section 13] Valmont: We're in Section 13! The talismans... Shendu: Quiet, you fool! Jade: Take the talismans if you desire them. I am interested in far greater powers! Valmont: Smashing! I'll just-Shendu: --I require no talismans, Your Majesty! I only wish to pay my... respects... Jade: Read me a story, demon! Shendu: Forgive me, Your Highness. I could easily translate this entire volume for you, but true power does not reside in textbooks. I could teach you, dark queen. Jade: And why should I trust you? [Jackie appears] Shendu: Beware! [the Shadowkhan grab and unmask Jackie] Jade (to Jackie): You! Shendu: Do you trust me now? Shendu (to Jade): Your skill far exceeds your years, Majesty! [after capturing Jackie] Shendu: Hear this, my Queen. Your first and most valuable lesson: always destroy your enemies!

Jackie: Don't listen to him, Jade. He's a demon! I'm your Uncle, your friend! Jade: Tch! You were! But things are different now! I have new friends! Jackie: Oh? If Shendu is your friend, why is he stealing your book? [Jade spots Shendu sneaking off with the Archive] Jade: Traitor! After him! [the Shadowkhan chase Shendu] [Tohru sneaks up and pours the potion on Jade's ankle; the tattoo vanishes] Jade: No! Shendu: No, destroy Chan! [the Shadowkhan turn and run towards Jackie] Jade: No... destroy... the book! [a ninja destroys the Demon Archive] Jade: Ugh, I have a weird feeling that I did something bad. Jackie: If you mean getting a tattoo when I told you not to, yes you did. But if you mean destroying the Demon Archive... we can live with that. "Shrink Rap" Hak Foo: The Bands of Shiva! With these, I will be unstoppable! Jackie (from inside the statue): Stop! (as Shiva) Do not take that which does not belong to you! Hak Foo: Shiva speaks! [pause] With a familiar voice... HAH! [punches the statue] Jackie: Shiva runs too! Jackie: Hak Foo seemed very interested in having these relics. Uncle: And Uncle is very interested in having his lunch! Jackie: What happened? Where am... [spots Hak Foo] we? Hak Foo: Geography later! Bands now! "And He Does His Own Stunts" [the Enforcers are carrying an antique] Shendu: Ah, ah, gingerly, watch your step. Place it over to the left-Valmont: --and into the incinerator. We could use some firewood. Shendu: Silence! With some sprucing, this fish heap will be worthy of housing a demon sorcerer-Valmont: --ex-demon sorcerer-Shendu: I may be vanquished, but I am still in charge, Valmont, as you can well see! Valmont: This is my hideout, and my body, Shendu! Shendu: Which reminds me, I have a change in wardrobe in mind for us. Valmont: Ah! You wouldn't dare! [The Enforcers drop the chest] Shendu: That is a thousand-year-old heirloom from the Ling Dynasty! Finn: Huh! Maybe if Game Geek over there would have helped...[points at Ratso] [Ratso solves the Pan Ku Box, revealing the location of the next demon portal] Valmont: Chow! [Chow grabs a camera] Shendu: Yes! Directions to the door which contains Tchang Zu, the Thunder Demon! Finn: Hey, Californi-yay! Ratso: We are here... Hak Fu: And we are to go south to-[the Pan Ku Box deactivates] Valmont (to Chow): You got that, didn't you? Chow (nervously): Pretty much all of it... before we ran out of tape... [Shendu starts snarling]

Finn: Dude. Run. [Chow runs out of the room, avoiding Shendu's fireball] [in California] Ratso: Aw, we're wandering anyway! I want to see Clark Gable's old house! Finn: Frankly, Ratso, I don't give a darn! And we got directions right here! Chow: Yeah, half way between the Pools of Despair and the Trails of Treachery. It's all so clear! Jade: Hey, look, the three stooges! Enforcers: Where? [Jade snatches map] Jade: Duh! Ratso (picking up Jade): Say cheese, princess. Tohru (picking up Ratso): Cheese, princess. Finn: Tohru! Finn Chow: Maybe he'd like to see some real stars! [takes out nun-chucks] [Jackie arrives] Finn: Chan! Chow: Uh, does this qualified as being outnumbered? Ratso: Works for me! [They run off] Larry Franklin (to Jackie): You have an agent? Jade: That would be moi? Franklin: Wham, bam! This town's getting younger every day! [after Jade shows Jackie a photograph she made of the demon portal map] Jade: Jade, how do you do that? Shendu: Greetings, Tchang Zu! Tchang Zu: What took you so long? Shendu: Just the usual interference from Jackie Chan. Tchang Zu: Then he will interfere no longer... [throws a lightning blast at him] [after Tchang Zu blasts Jackie] Shendu: As the thunder claps, so do I applaud your skill, brother. Tchang Zu: Shendu... you may call me "master". Shendu: Of course... Master. Finn: Ooh, tss! [Tchang Zu and the Dark Hand are traveling through Hollywood] Shendu: The surroundings may not seem familiar, but I assure you-Tchang Zu: Aargh! My palace! These humans have paved my paradise and constructed a... Ratso: ...parking lot? [Tchang Zu roars in rage] Tchang Zu: I will rebuild my palace. For the time being, Shendu, you shall find a dwelling place which befits me. Ratso: Uh, how about that one? [Ratso points to the new studio being opened] Tchang Zu (grudgingly): That would do. Tchang Zu: Away, infidels! [blasts the sky; the crowd claps and cheers] Tchang Zu: Why do they not flee?

Shendu: They think you are... entertainment. Uncle: The immortal who cast the original chi spell of Tchang Zu, the Thunder Demon, was patron deity of actors. Jackie: And the portal was located in a movie studio? Weird! [his cellphone rings] Hello? Where are you? Jade (on cellphone): Duh, Chinese theater! But so's the Thunder Demon, and he's packing serious voltage! Jackie: How do you do-- ugh. Jade, do nothing until I get there. Uncle: Jade never does nothing. Jackie: I know, but I feel like I have to say it. Jackie: Where is the demon? Tohru: Inside. Jackie: Uncle, the chi spell's ready? Uncle: I cannot prepare the spell. Jackie: What? Uncle: Need ingredients! Jackie: Why don't you have ingredients? Uncle: How am I supposed to gather chi ingredients when you steal my apprentice? 'Chaperone', hah! [at store] Uncle: One more thing: powder of Komodo dragon tooth. One more thing: tincture of tortoise shell! One more thing -- castanets -- the symbol of Cao Giu Jiu! Shopkeeper: In Chinatown Tchang Zu (on stage): I will scorch this city to the ground while the sound of thunder resonates! Finn: Heh, guy's a regular Olivier! [Jackie is sneaking into the Chinese theater] Hak Foo [behind him]: Welcome to the cheap seats, Chan! Tchang Zu (spotting him): You! I shall prove that lightning does indeed strike twice! [Tchang Zu hurls a lightning bolt -- Jackie dodges but Hak Foo is knocked unconscious] Jade: Uncle! Uncle: Must prepare chi spell. [hands Jades castanets] Hold these! Franklin: Who's the old guy? Jade: Cranky co-star, occasional comedy relief! Shendu (to Tchang Zu): Forget Chan! If that accursed old man completes his chi spell, you will be cast back into limbo! Finn: That would be our cue! [The Enforcers race towards Tohru] [one of Tchang Zu's bolts destroys Larry Franklin's car] Franklin: Bam! Jade (nervously): Uh... bam? Jade: So, Lar, I'm thinking 'buddy picture'! Chan and DiCapizzio, DiCapizzio and Chan! Franklin: There is no picture! And Jackie Chan will never do lunch in this town again! Ever! [Franklin storms away] Jackie: Lar didn't say anything about dinner. Come on, my treat! Tohru: We know of a Mexican restaurant where Uncle found the castanets! Jackie: In Chinatown? Uncle: Hollywood is a strange and mysterious place!

"Shanghai Moon" [after solving the Pan Ku Box] Hak Foo: To find this portal, we must travel north. Very north. Ratso: Brr, chilly! Hak Foo: Very very north. Chow: Okay, check the warranty on the box. We're, like, halfway to the moon! Shendu: Where did you think Tso Lan the Moon Demon would be found? [Jade's volcano project explodes] Jade: Maybe a working volcano exhibit is too advanced for me. Jade: Hey! Going on a mission, Jackie? Jackie: Uh, no! Not a mission! It's... uh... a conference. On feng shui. Captain Black: In Minnesota! Jackie: Want to come? Jade: Um... I would, Jackie, but you know how I have that new science project to cook up... [runs off] [while trapped on a rocket ship heading to the Moon] Captain Black (answering phone): Black! Jackie: Tell Uncle I have a strong hunch that the portal belongs to the Moon Demon! Shendu: Ah, lift off in-Valmont (taking control): Where are we? What are you wearing? [Finn points outside] Valmont: Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! Oh noo! Finn: Uh, we're cruising for Luna, Big V. Valmont: But that's impossible! Who's piloting this craft! [goes to the control room] Valmont: Ahoy! There has been a grave error. I demand that you turn this ship around posthaste! [pilot turns around; it turns out to be a monkey] Finn, Valmont, Chow, Hak Foo: (screaming) Ratso: Aww! [Jade shows up wearing the monkey's space-suit] Jade: Hi Jackie! Jackie: Jade! Jade: Check out the monkey suit. Literally! Jackie: But how did you-Jade: Speed talisman. Fastest way to get to 'Minnesota'. [winks] Jackie: Heh. Finn: Autopilot. You can relax, Big V. Major Matt Monkey is flying with training wheels! Valmont (dryly): I feel so much better. Ratso: Oh, those whirly rides make me nauseous. Chow: Space makes me nauseous! Shendu: Now we wait for this station to intersect with the portal belonging to Tso Lan... Chow: ...and open her up with this key! Jackie (whispering): I hope Uncle's on his way with that chi spell! [later] Captain Black: I have a second shuttle prepped to take you to Jackie. Uncle: Ai-yah! Do I look like Flash Gordon? I am too old to play 'spaceman'! Tohru: But, if you do not go, Sensei, who will cast the chi spell.

[Captain Black and Uncle turn to him] Tohru: Hmm. [Jackie Chan shows up] Ratso: Whoa! Shendu: Chan! Finn: Everybody's an astronaut... [after Jackie sends the Pan Ku Box into space] Shendu: Hak Foo, retrieve it! Ratso: You go, Hak! Shendu: And you simpletons -- get Chan! Shendu: Where is Hak Foo? The portal approaches! Jade: No box, no demon! Check please! Shendu: Tso Lan, so good to see you! Tso Lan: Save the pleasantries, Shendu. I am interested only in seizing control of the moon's gravity, so that I may pull the ball from its orbit. Jade; But--but that'll wreck all of Earth's ecosystems! Ratso: How do you know? Jade: I watch the science network! Tso Lan: The child is correct. And only then will Earth's landscape be to my liking. Ratso: Whoa. He wants to kibosh the planet! Finn: And you made us let him out? Shendu: Just be glad you are up here! Shendu: You have joined us in time to see the nemesis of all demon sorcerers destroyed! Tso Lan: This is Jackie Chan. [points to the monkey] [after the Dark Hand is ejected through the chute] Valmont: Shendu, I despise you. Shendu: I heard that! Tso Lan: It appears that the pleasure of destroying you shall be mine alone... Jackie: Uncle's chi spell would be nice right now. Tso Lan: Hiding only delays the inevitable. [arriving in space] Tohru: I see no one. Uncle: Prepare the chi spell. Then socialize! Tso Lan: Behold my mastery of gravity! Tso Lan (to Jackie and Jade, after finding them): And for you, things look very grave... Jackie: This is very bad. We need Uncle's chi spell. Jade: Earth to Jackie, we're in space! Where are we gonna get a chi spell? Jackie: A lotus pod? Jade: Isn't that... Tohru: ...the symbol of the Immortal who originally defeated Tso Lan, the Moon Demon! Jackie, Jade: Tohru! Jackie: But... where's Uncle? Uncle (over the headset): Tohru! Do you or do you not have nose-hair of possum?

[leaving the space shuttle] Jackie: Jade, it's not safe. Jade: So? Jackie: Where on Earth do I find a Moon Demon on the moon? [Tso Lan picks him up] Tso Lan: Behind you. Jackie: H-hello. Tso Lan: You dare interrupt me in my moment of triumph? Jackie: Heh, it's what I do. Uncle (over speaker): Yu mo gwai gui fai di zao, yu mo gwai gui fai di zao-Tso Lan: An incantation? The lotus pod... in order for it to hex me, you must remove your helmet... which you cannot do. Jackie: Then let me air this out! [removes helmet] [after Tso Lan is banished] Jackie: So long, Tso Lan. "Armor of the Gods" Jackie: Jade, what are you doing up? Jade: Old Yeller is keeping us all up. He hasn't slept in days! Uncle: TOHRU! WHERE IS MY TEA? Jackie: Uncle, why won't you sleep? Uncle: Because... I have demons on the brain. I lay down, and all I hear is chi spell chi spell chi spell! Jackie: Have you tried counting sheep? Uncle: Demons always eat them! Captain Black: Jackie, we've spotted the Dark Hand. Jackie: I'm on my way! Captain Black: Care to know where you're going? Jackie: I don't care! Anywhere but here! Jackie: Uncle, I am off to Spain! I will call you for the chi spell once I find out which demon we are dealing with. Uncle: Take the Armor! It could be of some use. Jackie: But you have to discover what magic it holds! Uncle: How can I do that if you take with you? [in Pamplona, Spain] Ratso: I'm telling ya, Pamplona's famous for something! Hak Foo: It must be the paella. Ratso: Ooh, the thing they whack with a stick until candy comes out? Valmont: That would be a pinata, Ratso. This is Spain, not Mexico. Ratso: I know this place is famous for something! Shendu: Soon, it will be famous for the return of Dai Gui, the Earth Demon! Jackie (quietly, from a distance): No it won't... Uncle: Jade! TV is too loud! [Jade turns down the TV] Uncle: Still too loud! [Jade turns off the TV] Uncle: I can hear the electricity in the wires! Unplug!

Jade: Ugh, I wish there was a way to unplug Uncle. [thinks] Hmm... [after making sleeping potion] Jade: Call Uncle a lumberjack, because he's going to be sawing logs! Uncle: Jade, the books are laughing at me! Jade (whispering): Not for long... [aloud] Tea, dear Uncle? [Uncle takes several sips] Uncle: This tea tastes like it was brewed with beard of goat! One more thing, it is bitter! One more thing, it is cold! One more thing!... ahh... [falls asleep] Jade: Hot-cha! [after Jackie Chan grabs the Pan Ku Box] Shendu: Stop him, you fop! Valmont: I'm trying, you old dragon! [sounds of yelling from the bull stampede reaches them] Hak Foo: Do you hear that, Chan? The Earth Demon has been released? Shendu: How can that be the Earth Demon, you buffoon? The portal remains to be released! [they see a stampede of bulls coming towards them] Ratso: That's what Pamplona's famous for! The running of the bulls... [inside the dream] Uncle: Jade! How happy I am to see you! Jade: You are? Uncle: You are my favorite person in the whole wide world! Jade: You're not Uncle! What have you done with him? Uncle: Oh, Jade, you are such a card! Ha ha ha! [Uncle dances around] Jade: It's only a dream... it's only a dream. [to Uncle] Just give me the ingredients to cast a spell against the Earth Demon, and you can go back to being all weird, 'kay? Uncle: Must I think about demons? Happy thoughts! Only happy thoughts! Jade: Uncle! I need the chi spell! Now! Uncle: Okay, Little Miss Cranky! First, you need the symbol of the Immortal who originally defeated the Earth Demon. Jade: And that would be...? Uncle: A flower! Second, you need the key ingredient found in every chi spell: hair of ewe! Jade: Didn't know my hair was so potent! And third? Uncle: For that, I must do research... after a nap! [after freeing the Earth Demon] Shendu: So good to see you out and about, Dai Gui. Dai Gui: Ugh, too many flowers. Dai Gui does not like pretty. My kingdom must be submerged into the depths of the earth! Do not stand there; start digging! Ratso: D-d-digging? Shendu: We would most happy to assist, burliest of brothers. But we have other portals to seek, family to release. Dai Gui: Very well then. The dirty work shall be mine alone. Dai Gui: You are either a very large grub, or this 'Jackie Chan' of whom all demons speak. Jackie: Grub! Grub! Dai Gui: Consider yourself buried, Jackie Chan! [Dai Gui smashes Jackie with a boulder] Dai Gui: Grub? Or flatworm? Heh. Heh heh. [Jackie emerges from beneath the boulder, wearing the armor]

Jackie: Didn't feel a thing. Tohru: Earthquake? Jade: Earth demon. Dai Gui: I shall shell you of that armor. I bet that you are soft inside, like the lee chee nut. [after Uncle wakes] Uncle: Good morning, Jade! [Dai Gui advances on them] Uncle: Ai-yah! [Jade blasts him backwards] Jade: Uncle, we have the ingredients! What are we doing wrong? Uncle: I see no hair of ewe! Jade: I keep plucking, I'm going to get a bald spot! Uncle: No, Jade, ewe! A female sheep! Jade: Well, there's plenty of those... in your dreams. [Tohru points to Uncle's jacket] Tohru: Wool? [Uncle plucks a strand of wool from his jacket] Uncle, Tohru (very quickly): Yu mo gwai gui fai di zao, yu mo gwai gui fai di zao... Jade: Here comes my favorite part... Jade, Dai Gui: NOOOOOOOOOOOOO! [Dai Gui is banished back through his portal] Jackie: How are you feeling, Uncle? Uncle: Very well, thank you... except for the demon screaming in my face! One more thing, I told you the Armor was good armor! One more thing, you should never question Uncle! Tohru: You should have made Uncle's tea stronger. He is still cranky. Jade: I don't think that there's enough tea in China to simmer Uncle down. But I'll take Mr. Sour Puss over Mr. Happy Pants any old day! "Tale of a Demon Tail" Jackie: You have everything you need for the Sky Demon chi spell, Uncle? [Uncle inspects each ingredient in turn] Uncle: Bat-wing dust, lotus oil, hummingbird saliva, root beer... [pauses] root beer?! Jade: Sorry, mine! [Jade drinks the soda] Jackie: That's your fifth soda! Jade: One for every Fenway frank! Had to wash it down with something. Tohru: I do not know where she puts it all. Jade: Uh-oh, pitstop! Jackie: You have to do this now? Jade: Hello, five sodas! [Jade runs to the women's bathrooms] [Shendu approaches the women's bathroom] Ratso: Whoa, boss! You can't go in where no man has gone before. Shendu: We are not going in, fool! Hsi Wu the Sky Demon is coming out! [the Enforcers take out their nunchucks] Chow: Da da da da! Ratso: Charge! [They attack Jackie] [Hsi Wu emerges from the portal]

Shendu: Welcome back, Hsi Wu! [baseball crowd applauses] Hsi Wu: The crowd roars for me? [Jackie begins playing the flute; Hsi Wu severs his own tail in order to escape] Hsi Wu: Retrieve my tail! [Hsi Wu flies away] Jackie: It didn't work! Uncle: Of course it did not work -- the demon is out of range! Shendu: The tail! Captain Black: I don't care if you are wearing a dress, Valmont. You are not going in the little girls' room! [Hsi Wu's tail is wreaking havoc] Uncle: Ai-yah! Jackie, restrain the tail! Jackie: I'm trying, Uncle! [the tail smacks Jackie] Jade: I don't think he likes you, Jackie. Uncle: The tail seeks its owner: Hsi Wu, the Sky Demon. [Uncle puts the tail in a box] Uncle: This box is now protected by a chi spell. Bad magic cannot touch it. Until we devise a way to use the tail to our advantage, we must be very cautious. This chi powder will also keep any demon from entering, unless they are invited. [Uncle closes the door] Hsi Wu (whispering): So, I need an invitation, do I? Drew: Hey, Jade, going to the spring dance Friday night? Jade: Eh, was thinking about it. Drew: Who are you gonna go with? A ninja? Or do you only fight them? Hyah! Hyah! [children laugh] Jade (sarcastically): You're a riot, Drew. Hsi Wu (as Seymour): Hey, Drew, who are you gonna go with? Your mother? [children laugh; Drew storms away] Jade: Thanks, uh... Seymour: I'm Hsi W... Seymour... W...Jahoositz. Jade: Jade Chan. You must be new! Seymour: Yeah, I just... flew into town. So, Jade, is it true? Jade: Of course! [pause] What? Seymour: Do you really fight ninjas? Jade: You bet! [later] Jade: ...and Jackie was knocking them off the rollercoaster tracks! Seymour: That is so awesome! Jade: Tch, that was nothing. Lately, Jackie's been taking on way worse than ninjas. Seymour: Like what? Jade: Well, you probably won't believe this, but yesterday, we captured part of a demon. Seymour: No way! Jade: Way! Wanna see it? Seymour: You bet! [in the room where the box is] Uncle: Jade, what are you doing? (to Seymour) And who are you? Jackie: Uncle, what's going on? Uncle: Jade opened the box with the You Know What inside? Jackie: Jade, you know you're not supposed to open the box with the You Know What inside.

Seymour: Jade didn't open it; I did. Uncle: Bad magic cannot touch good... show me your burn marks, demon boy! Seymour: I didn't mean to cause any trouble, sir. I just wanted to see the You Know What inside. Uncle: This friend of Jade's is too polite. Jackie: Uncle, Jade finally has a friend her own age. This could keep her away from portals and demons. Jade: Seymour, thanks for taking the hit. Nobody's ever done that for me. Seymour: Hey, what are friends for? Jade: Well, see you tomorrow? Seymour: Probably! [Jade sighs and closes the door; Seymour/Hsi Wu touchs the door and gets burned] Seymour: Ow! Until tomorrow then... [sprouts wings and flies away] [Tohru and Jade are folding socks] Jade: Seymour's loads more fun than any of the other kids in school. We like the same things, and he actually listens to me! We're like Yin and Yang, Yang and Yin. Tohru: Good and evil? Jade: Left and right; two halves of the same whole. Duh. I'm just not sure if Seymour knows it. Tohru: Why don't you ask him to the school dance? Jade: Ew, you mean, like, on a date? We're friends. Besides... what if he says no? Uncle: Since the tail wants to find its owner, I will coat it with the proper chi spell ingredients, then release it and let it lead us to Hsi Wu. Tohru: Where it will reattach, infusing the demon with the chi spell... Jackie: ...which I will activate, by blowing the flute! [Jackie blows the flute] Uncle: Ai-yah! Blow only once the tail attaches! [Uncle begins packing his bag] Jackie: What's all that, Uncle? Uncle: Mung bean sandwiches for the trip! Jackie: Trip? Uncle: The Sky Demon could be halfway around the globe by now! Seymour: So, we going inside to study? Jade: Maybe later. I--I have something I want to give you first. [Jade gives Seymour a necklace] See? It's a friendship medallion -- y'know, two halves of the same coin. Seymour: Gee, I'd love to see how I--how we look in them. D'you have a mirror inside? Jade: You really like it? You can wear it to the Spring dance! Uh... I'd wear mine, but I don't know if I'm going. Are you? Seymour: Me? Why would I-- [pause] Well, actually, I was thinking about going, but I need to call my mother first and get her permission. I guess I have to go inside and use your phone... [Jade pulls out a cellphone; Hsi Wu scowls] [Uncle, Jackie, and Tohru emerge with the demon tail] Seymour: I smell a spell! [the tail flies towards him; he catches it] Seymour: Stee-rike! Uncle: Hsi Wu! I told you I did not like him! Jade: You're--you're... Seymour (making his face into Hsi Wu's): A demon? Still want to go the dance with me? [on the roof] Seymour: What have you done to my tail, sly Uncle? Uncle: Ancient proverb: none of your beeswax!

Seymour: I am in no mood for games! Now, remove your spell from my tail or you'll wish you had wings! Uncle: What is hexed cannot be unhexed. Seymour: Then cast another spell! Uncle: How can I cast a spell without my spell books? [Jade takes the Tiger Talisman] Jade: Fight fire with fire. Fight yin... with yang. [on the roof] Shendu: Greetings, brother Wu. Seymour: Did you bring them? [the Enforcers clamber onto the roof with the books] Ratso: The geezer's books... right here... Chow: Nosebleed city! Seymour (to Uncle): Well? You have your texts; seek a spell! Uncle: Uncle... er... does not have his reading glasses! [after Jade tracks Hsi Wu/Seymour with the Tiger Talisman] Jade: Hey, friend! Wanna dance? [Seymour transforms into Hsi Wu] Hsi Wu: Let's! [Jade flies into the air] Hsi Wu: You? But... how? Jade: Talisman math: Levitation + Speed = Flight! Jade: Jade, why are you-- [ducks Ratso's punch] how did you-- [dodges Chow's kick] why did you-- [ducks Shendu's attack] ...ah, talk later! [Shendu breathes fire at Jackie] Shendu: The choice is yours, Jackie Chan: crash... or burn! [after Hsi Wu's banishment] Jade: So long... Seymour. Jade: You were right about the good and evil thing, T. Tohru: There will be other dances, Jade. Jade: Dance, schmance. I am so over Seymour! I just miss having someone around who listens. [pause] Someone... like you! [gives Tohru her necklace] Yin and Yang. Big and small. You and me. "The New Atlantis" [after summoning Bai Tza] Shendu: Join us, sister dearest! [Bai Tza screams] Ratso: Whoa, fish out of water! Bai Tza: At last! Liberation! And now, for some libation! Which will require moister climes than this... Shendu: Now that I have opened the last portal, sister Bai Tza, it is time to liberate me from my prison of flesh. Bai Tza: You dare request your freedom? Shendu: Have I not earned it? As promised, I have released all our brothers and sisters! Bai Tza: How curious then, that six demon sorcerers remain trapped in the void! I should obliterate you on their behalf!

Shendu: I held my part of the bargain! You cannot blame me for the meddlings of Jackie Chan! [Jackie Chan arrives] Shendu: Speaking of whom... [The Enforcers draw their laser swords] Finn: Chariot race is over, Chan. Ratso: It's gladiator time! Chow: Strength and honor! Valmont (reasserting control): Is it over? Am I free of Shendu? Finn: Uh... the mermaid said 'no deal', Big V. Valmont: Ugh! Bai Tza: Your spells may have quelled my siblings, but I am a slippery one! [hurls a water ball at Uncle] [after Bai Tza gets run over by a truck] Jade: Huh! Guess we won't be needing that chi spell after all! Jackie: Don't be so sure, Jade--Jade! I thought I told you to stay with... [notices Tohru] ...Tohru. Tohru: Heh. She is very persuasive. Uncle: The Water Demon will return to her undersea empire. Then, not even my most powerful chi spell will stop her! Jade: So forget the books! Let's pack our flippers and-[Uncle hands her a huge stack of books] Uncle: Research! Bai Tza's empire is also known as the lost continent of Atlantis. Jackie: Atlantis? Tohru: I thought it was merely a myth. Uncle: No one has ever been able to find it! Jade: Heh, hence the "lost" part... [Bai Tza floats among the ruins of Atlantis] Bai Tza: My empire lies in ruins! Time has done its worst... which means it's time for me to claim a new empire! [Valmont now has green skin and horns] Valmont: Wearing the skirt is demeaning enough, Shendu, but this is over the line! Shendu: Do you think I am pleased with our union, Valmont? But if I am to remain in your pathetic body, I must at least make a few cosmetic improvements! Now hold still while I sprout our tail. [Shendu and Valmont begin fighting inside Valmont's body] Valmont: Oh, you'll do nothing of the-Shendu: --do not try to-Valmont: --I'll fight you with every last-Shendu: --you will lose-[Bai Tza emerges] Bai Tza: Shendu! Valmont: Good madam, free me of Shendu, I beg you! Look what he did to my head! Bai Tza: My answer to you and my sniveling brother remains... no. [Bai Tza knocks Valmont aside] Finn (whispering): Oooh, nasty piranha. Bai Tza: You! [grabs Finn with her tentacles] Finn (nervously): Hey, you're a fish, I'm Finn! We're simpatico! Bai Tza: Direct me to a suitable new empire! Finn: Mi casa es su casa, Your Amphibiousness!

Bai Tza: A fish cannery? Finn: Heh, see your point. Well, there's lots of nice places here in San Fran. And it's all by the water. Chow: Yeah, great town! Ratso: Except for the quakes... Bai Tza (pensively): Earthquakes? Finn: Uh, yeah. The San Andreas fault runs right through downtown. Better idea -- you should move to the East Coast! Bai Tza: So be it. Your San Fran shall be the cradle of my new undersea empire! Ratso: Uh, but isn't your undersea empire supposed to be, y'know... Chow: ...undersea? Bai Tza: And so it shall be, once I sink this city! [Bai Tza vanishes] Ratso: Uh-oh. Chow (nervously): Sh--she's gonna sink the city? Finn: Uh, can we be excused, Shendu? Ratso: Seeing as how we opened all the portals for you, heh heh... Chow: ...you don't need us to carry old Pan Ku any more... Shendu: Never seeing any of you ever again will make me a very happy dragon! [the Enforcers leave] Valmont: Weren't you listening, Shendu? If we stay here, we will drown! Shendu: Not if we have gills... Valmont: If you change so much as another hair on my head, I'll... Shendu: You will what? [Valmont spots the Pan Ku Box] Shendu: Do not be a fool! The Pan Ku Box is forged of good magic. You know we cannot touch it! Valmont: No! You cannot touch it! [Valmont grabs the box, electrocuting himself; his horn vanishes and his skin goes back to normal] Valmont: My face! He's gone! He's gone! He's-- [looks in the mirror] --out cold... [Valmont enters Uncle's shop] Valmont: Good evening! Jackie: What do you want? Valmont: Shh! You will wake Shendu! Jackie: He's... napping? Valmont: I rendered him unconscious. Now please, you must help me. I want him exorcised! Jade: Tch, like we're going to help Shendu get in shape! Uncle: Exorcised, Jade. Jackie: He wants to remove Shendu's spirit from his body. Jade: Oh. Jackie: But why should we help you? Valmont: Because there is nothing either of us wants more than to be rid of that blasted Fire Demon! Tohru: A Dark Hand trick. [Tohru grabs Valmont and prepares to eject him] Valmont: No trick! I will tell you anything you want to know. Our hideout -- it's the Helm's Fish Cannery! Jade: That's nice. We have bigger fish to fry. Jackie: Like finding the demon you unleashed, remember? Valmont: She's in San Francisco! Uncle: Bai Tza? Jade: Here?

Jackie: Where? [Tohru sets Valmont down] Valmont: You scratch my back, I'll scratch yours..... Jackie: Bai Tza plans to sink San Francisco by causing an earthquake? But how? Valmont: Just because I'm possessed by a demon doesn't mean I can read their minds. Jackie: She would need to jar the fault. An explosion... Jade: ...a flood! Tohru: Tea, sensei? Uncle: Thank you. Valmont: Jolly good, Tohru, I would love a spot. [Tohru growls] Valmont (nervously): Ah, right then. [Uncle draws a symbol on Valmont] Uncle: This hanzi will suppress Shendu's spirit until I am able to concoct a true exorcism spell. Valmont: Well, it's more becoming than a horn, I suppose... [aboard Valmont's jet] Valmont: Just like old times, eh, Tohru? [Tohru growls] Valmont: I recommend you watch your back, Chan. Tohru turned coat on me, you remember? Tohru: You forced me to fight a demon! Valmont (sarcasm): Oh, yes, that's completely different from what Chan has you doing. [after Jade sneaks up on them] Valmont: So this is why your niece is always with you. And here I just thought you were horribly irresponsible! Jade: Bai-Jackie: And good-bye to you, Jade. Jade: No! Bai Tza! [points to Bai Tza entering the train station] Bai Tza (chanting): Lai shui zai, lai shui zai... Tohru: I have seen such symbols in Uncle's books, used for summoning spells. Jade: What's she trying to summon? Jackie: Enough water for a flood? The station's lower levels are underground, closer to the fault. Valmont: And I can't imagine that the subway station is built to withstand the crushing pressure of raging floodwaters. Jackie: Quickly, Tohru, the chi spell! Tohru: I need preparation time! Jackie: I will run interference! [Jackie jumps into Bai Tza's summoning circle and begins fighting] Tohru: I must be within range. (to Valmont) Jade does not remain safe, I will turn you inside out. Valmont: I won't let her out of my sight, old chap. [Jackie gets blasted by Bai Tza] Jade: Jackie! Valmont: Ah ah, stay right here with Uncle Valmont! Tohru: I hate fish! Jade: Uncle, we need another gourd. And while you're at it, we need to break a water summoning spell.

Uncle (on the phone): Ai-yah! Too many spells! Valmont: And how's that exorcism spell coming along? [while fighting Jackie underwater] Bai Tza: Welcome to my world, Chan! [watching the fight] Jade: Jackie! Valmont: I'm not sure who to root for! [Jade punches him in the arm] Valmont: Go Jackie. Jade: Go Valmont. Valmont: And ruin my Italian shoes? Jade: And keep Shendu for a roommate? Valmont: Oh, all right! [after Valmont drop-kicks Bai Tza] Bai Tza: You dare to betray me, Shendu? Valmont: ...Yes, he does. I insist you remove him from me at once and give him a trouncing! [Bai Tza blasts him water, washing off the suppression spell] Jackie: Valmont? Shendu: Chan! Bai Tza: They've been playing tricks on you, brother! Shendu: Then they shall suffer a dragon's fury! [Shendu exhales a blast of flame; Tohru throws Bai Tza into its path] [after Shendu and Bai Tza flee] Jackie: Uncle, you did not remove Shendu from Valmont? Uncle: With what spell? Too many interruptions! I had to concoct anti-water summoning spell first! Jackie: So Bai Tza and Shendu remain at large... Jade: Jackie, hello, we just saved the city from the big one! Jackie: She will return. Jade: And when she does, we'll hook her like a trout. Now, come on, I say we treat you to a Pan Ku breakfast! [pause] Pan Ku? I meant pancake. Duh! "The Eighth Door" [Jackie watches the storm through the binoculars from their boat] Jackie: Nice day for a tsunami. [pause] Too nice. Tohru: Why here? Uncle: The Water Demon will need a palace from which to rule her new undersea kingdom. Jackie: Here she comes, Uncle -- Bai Tza. Uncle: Jackie, take the gourd. I will prepare the chi spell! Right! [notices Jade] Ah! Jade? Jade: No, I'm a Moose! Marlon Moose! Jackie: Jade, you were supposed to wait at Section 13! Jade: Tch! I've been to every demon sendoff so far! Did you really think I was going to sit out the last one? [holds up a video camera] Besides, now we can sell our story to reality TV! Tohru: Shall I turn back? Jackie: No. (to Jade) Please, just keep out of harm's way. [Uncle begins chanting] Bai Tza: The chi wizard! [Bai Tza gets hit by the chi spell] Jade: Ooh, fish fry! [Jade gets too close and falls into the path of the chi spell]

Jackie: Jade! Jade: Jackie! Jackie: Uncle! We have to get Jade! You have to reopen the portal! Uncle: The chi spell has sealed the portal, like it has sealed all the others: forever! [in the Netherworld] Jackie: Hurry, Uncle! We must fly to Rome! Uncle: Jade is not in Rome, Jackie; she is trapped in the Demon Netherworld. Tohru: Oh, why couldn't it have been me? Jackie: There must be something we can do, Uncle. A counter-spell, a stronger spell, some way to-- [Uncle hits him] Uncle: I cannot think with all your noise! [pauses, looks up] The eighth door! Jackie: Uncle? Uncle: We have permanently sealed seven portals belonging to seven demon sorcerers, but not the one belonging to Shendu. It is Jade's only hope of escaping from the demon realm. Tohru: But how do we find Shendu's door? Uncle: There is only one way. Jackie: The Pan Ku Box. Tohru: But Shendu has it! How do we find him? [flashback] Valmont: --our hideout! It's the Helm's Fish Cannery! [/end flashback] Tohru: Oh. Uncle: Quickly -- we must find the eighth door before the demons find Jade! [Jade is recording herself] Jade: The Demon Netherworld. Where demon sorcerers go when they've been bad, where no human has gone before. Until now... My ratings will be huge! If I ever find my way out of here. Hsi Wu: Sister Po! Jade: Uh-oh! [Jade hides] Hsi Wu: Sister Po! [Po Kong wakes] Po Kong: Dinner time? Hsi Wu: Meeting time. Our sister Bai has returned. Po Kong: I see. Well, perhaps she brought hors d'oeurves. Mmm, I love the taste of humans! Jade (quietly): Oh boy.. Hsi Wu: Over here! [all the demons congregate around them] Jade: Double 'oh boy'... Shendu: You may take your leave, Hak Foo. [Hak Foo bows and leaves] Valmont: I order you to stay! [Hak Foo stops] Hak Foo: Hmm? Shendu: Leave! Valmont: Stay! Shendu: Leave! Valmont: Stay! Shendu: Leave! Valmont: Stay! Shendu: Leave! Valmont: Stay! Shendu: Your ruffian has outlived his usefulness to me, Valmont. Get rid of him! Valmont: And be left alone with you? I think not, Shendu!

[The Demon Sorcerers appear in Valmont's mirror] Bai Tza: On the contrary, the both of you... Tso Lan: ...are far from alone. Shendu (nervously): Brothers and sisters! So good to...see you! Xiao Fung: Your sentiment will quickly subside, Shendu... Dai Gui: ...once your punishment is under way! Shendu: P-p-punishment? Before I finished securing your release? Po Kong: And how do you plan to do that, with all our portals permanently sealed? Jade (quietly): Yeah, how? Shendu: ...w-why, through my portal, dear sister! Bai Tza: The eighth portal? Shendu: It remains unsealed. All I need do is unlock it with the Pan Ku Box, a task for which I have retained the services of a mortal servant who may touch good magic! Hak Foo: Huh? Shendu: What is mine is yours, demon brethren! [Po Kong begins scratching herself noisily during the meeting] Bai Tza: What in the Netherworld is wrong with you, Po Kong? Po Kong: ...itch...cannot reach... Bai Tza: You! Scratch your sister's back so that we may get on with our meeting. Hsi Wu: Ugh, there's a lot of back! Could take a while... [Jade quickly scratches Po Kong's back for her] Hsi Wu: So, you wanna back scratcher... [Po Kong grabs Hsi Wu] Po Kong: It passed. [She flicks him away] Bai Tza: Now about the eighth door, Shendu. It is the portal of your banishment; only you may pass through it. Shendu: That once was true, Bai Tza. But now that I am a spirit, my portal is vacant, waiting to be filled by others. Tso Lan: You mean another. Only one may pass through each portal. Xiao Fung: That is the rule! [pause] Shendu: Do you think I have been dallying here? [picks up a phone book] I have discovered a spell... which will keep the portal open until the last of you is freed! In fact, I was just preparing to journey to it when you called. Hak Foo, bring me-[he notices the Pan Ku Box being stolen] Shendu: --the Pan Ku Box? Hak Foo: Shark snatches bait! [Hak Foo jumps to grab the box] Bai Tza: What shark? Xiao Fung: What is he talking about? Jade (whispering): Jackie! [Jackie kicks Hak Foo into a gong] Bai Tza: Shendu, what is happening? Shendu: Uh, Hak Foo always hangs the gong as we take our leave. Which reminds me, see you all at my portal! [Shendu covers the mirror] Bai Tza: Shendu! Po Kong: Can be trusted? Dai Gui: Of course not. Xiao Fung: Yet we have no other options... Tso Lan: ...but all of eternity to punish him should he again deceive us... Hsi Wu: Then let us go to the eight door. Jade (whispering): Yes, let's. Shendu: Why the interest in the box, Chan? You have sealed all the portals. Jackie: I want a keepsake of our time together.

Uncle: In ancient times, Shendu ruled what is now China. I am betting that that is where we will find his portal. Tohru: But even if we are able to make this box provide the portal's location, how will Jade find it from the demons' side? Uncle: With proper guidance. That is why I have brought research! [Jackie struggles with Pan Ku Box] Jackie: Nothing. Jade is good at puzzles. She could figure out... if she were here... [on the plane] Uncle: In ancient times, Shendu ruled what is now China. I am betting that that is where we will find his portal! Tohru: But even if we are able to make this box provide the portal's location, how will Jade find it from the demon side? Uncle: With proper guidance! That is why I have brought research. [Jackie struggles to open the Pan Ku Box] Jackie: Nothing. Jade is good at puzzles; she could figure it out... if she were here... Valmont: We are on our way to China... why? Shendu: Chan has stolen the Pan Ku Box. Clearly, he wants to find my portal so he can seal it. Valmont: Now, why would Chan go to all the trouble if he knows you don't need the portal to pass between the realms? Shendu: For good measure, I suppose. Meanwhile, my brothers and sisters are expecting me to open my door and free them. Hak Foo: I brought your spellbook. [holds out the phone book] Shendu: You brought a phone book, you simpleton! I was bluffing! Valmont: So there is no way to free all of them? Shendu: Of course there is! I... just need to find it, that's all. Jade: Day number... ugh, I haven't the foggiest. The good news? The demons have left to find the eighth portal. The bad news? I lost their trail... Jackie, Tohru, Uncle, I may never see you again, but in case you ever find this footage, edit this mushy part out before you sell it to a TV show. Just want you all to know I miss you. I even miss Uncle's garlic breath... [Uncle's head appears] Uncle: Jade! Jade: Ah! [Jade's camera goes flying] Jade: Uncle? How did you--? Uncle: Not important! And garlic is good for you! Are you okay? Jade: Tch. Just lost. Uncle: Listen closely. We are trying to find the eighth door! Jade: Shendu's door! Uncle: You know about that? Jade: The demons are looking for it too. Shendu told them he's going to open it up so they can all break out. Uncle: Ah, Shendu deceives them! Only one being can now exit through that portal, and that being must be you! Jade: So how do I find the portal, Uncle? Uncle: When I know where it is, I will lead you there myself! [Uncle's head vanishes] Jade: Go Uncle! [Uncle's head reappears] Uncle: One more thing -- I cannot know where it is unless I know how the Pan Ku Box works. Jackie said that you are good with puzzles! Jade: Hmm... [time passes] Those little lines on the Pan Ku Box! Uncle: The trigrams?

Jade: Yeah, those! Tell Jackie the 'trigrams' must be the key! Uncle: I will do that, Jade! Hsi Wu: Time flies while you're waiting for a cell door to open... [the camera hits Hsi Wu in the head] Jade: Where's my camera? [Hsi Wu flies towards her, holding the camera] Hsi Wu: Oh, Jade? Say chi spell! Jackie: The trigrams must be the key. Oh, what could Jade mean? Uncle: Shendu's trigram representing fire is a broken line between two solid lines! Tohru: The trigrams could be a Morse code... Jackie: ...or the combination to a lock! If a solid line is a half turn... Tohru: ...and the broken lines are quarter turns... [Jackie turns the puzzle -- it fails] Jackie: Ugh. Tohru: Um, perhaps the unbroken lines tell us to turn it the long way. [Jackie begins turning it again] Jackie: Half... quarter... quarter... half... [the Pan Ku Box activates, revealing the portal location] Jackie (happily): Jade knows her puzzles! Jade: And I know my demons! Shendu's portal is in Hong Kong! [the portal turns out to be at Hong Kong Mooseworld] Jackie: You have to be kidding. Jade: It is as if Jade herself guided us here... Jackie: Hong Kong Mooseworld! Uncle: I will alert Jade! Hsi Wu: Brothers and sisters, I bring you the mortal called 'Jade'! Po Kong: Mmm, yummy! [Uncle's head appears behind the demons] Jade: Uh, if you think you're all getting out, well, I hate to break it to you, but... Shendu's lying. [demons gasp; Uncle winks and vanishes] Jade; Only one of you can go through the portal. End of story. Dai Gui: How do you know? Jade: Uncle told me. Bai Tza: The chi wizard! Tso Lan: So Shendu did deceive us... Xiao Fung: There's a surprise. Jade: So, uh, which one of you is it going to be? Xiao Fung: Surely there must a civil way to resolve this! Tso Lan: Like what? Alphabetical order? Uncle: Jade awaits us! Jackie: We must open the portal immediately! Shendu: So that is why you wanted the box! Well, I assure you, Chan: the only thing emerging from my portal will be a demon! [after Hak Foo opens the portal] Uncle: Jackie! There is more than one way to skin a cat! And two ways to open a portal! [tosses Jackie a sword and begins chanting] Shendu: Aaah, the symbol of the immortal who defeated me! Jackie: Sword slays dragon! [Shendu leaves Valmont and falls into the portal]

[the demons and Jade all race to exit through the portal] Jade: Hsi Wu? One goes through, that's the rule! [blows him a kiss, then enters the portal] [after the last portal closes] Tchang Zu: That is number eight. Tso Lan: Which would make us fresh out of portals. Hsi Wu: Say chi spell! [the other demons surround Shendu angrily] Shendu: Perhaps we should seek a...er... tear, in the time-space continuum? "Demon World" Shen: Cousin Jackie! It is so good to see you again! Shen's Wife: You have been such a good role model for Jade. Jackie: Oh, well, thank you. I-Uncle: You take credit for my good influence? Shen, Wife: Uncle! Jade: Tch! Is Uncle everyone's Uncle? Shen: He's actually our cousin. [to Uncle] Aren't you? [Jackie and Uncle shrug] Shen's Wife: What brings you all to Hong Kong? [Tohru enters] Tohru: We banished the last demon! Shen, Wife: Demon? Tohru: Uh... Jade (hastily): Er, right! The Demon is the name of the new rollercoaster at the Hong Kong Moose World! Look at the cool watch Jackie got me there! [presses a button] Watch: Hey-hey-hey, I'm Marlon Moose! Shen, Wife: Ohhh... [Shendu is being tortured] Shendu: Stop! Hsi Wu: What is it now, Shendu? Shendu: Admittedly, I have failed you, my siblings. [Tchang Zu blasts him] Aaah! But I may yet save you as well. We can all regain our freedom, and even reclaim the centuries wasted in this void... if you allow me to pursue one last recourse! Po Kong: Hah! And that would be? Shendu: The Book of Ages! [gasp] Dai Gui: Ludicrous! Hsi Wu: Even we never dared to tamper with that! Bai Tza: You risk altering the very fabric of reality! Shendu: Am I to assume this reality pleases you, sister? Po Kong: Hmm, these are desperate times. Shendu: Then I will make things right. All you need do is allow me to once more depart from this realm and possess a human. The right human. [after Jackie gets possessed by Shendu, he goes crazy and escapes] Shen: We are very sorry, Jade, but it seems that it is unsafe for you to remain with Cousin Jackie. Shen's Wife: He is clearly a troublemaker! [They leave] Jade: Jackie's not a troublemaker. But he is in trouble... [at the airport, on the phone] Jackie: Jade! Jade: Jackie? Jackie: I'm at the airport! Shendu's flying to Australia!

Jade: Australia? Why? [Shendu reasserts control] Shendu: You will find out soon enough! [in Australia] Shendu (chanting): Kuai kuai qi lai, kuai kuai qi lai, kuai kuai qi lai... [a portal opens up] Uncle: The Book of Ages, where all history is magically-recorded! Jade: History lesson's over, Shendu! [attacks him; Shendu shrugs her off] Shendu: So is it written, so it shall be! [in Demon World] Jade: Mom, Dad? Shen's Wife: What are you doing here? Jade: Uh, Hong Kong Moose World? Shen: Why aren't you at the palace? Shen's Wife: And where did you find those strange clothes? Jade: I was going to ask you two the same thing Shen's Wife: And what do you have in your hand? Shen: Hurry! We must pay our respects! Jade: Respects? To who? What's going... [everyone bows down; Shendu parades past on a chariot pulled by dragons] Jade: ...on? Shen's Wife: It is forbidden! Get down! Jade: Shendu! [pause] Jade: Shendu's alive? I gotta tell... [spots Jackie (long pony tail) sweeping] Jackie? What'd you do to hair? What are you doing? [hands Jade his broom] Jackie: Your job! Jade (skeptically): Sweeping dragon doo? Jackie: Where have you been, Jade? Where is your uniform? Jade: Um... why exactly do we have to wear uniforms? Jackie: Because it is required of all servants of the Supreme Ruler, his Majestic Highness, Lord Shendu! Jade: Are you telling me Shendu rules the world? Jackie: Oh, of course not! Each of the eight emperors has his or her own domain! Jade: Since when? Jackie: Since the dawn of history! What is wrong with you today? [Jackie leaves] Jade: Hmm, 'history'.... Uncle said that the Book of Ages magically recorded history! When Shendu wrote in it, he must have rewrote the past so that he was never destroyed, and the demons were never banished through their portals! And now... [gasps] I'm in Demon World! Jackie: Today, you must scrub Master's bath chamber. Jade: No way! Jackie: Then fill his tub with fresh muck. Jade: Ew! Blegh! Jackie: And, it's Talon's Day! So don't forget to trim Master's toenails. Jade: Jackie, listen to me! I don't work for Shendu, and neither do you. Demons don't rule the world, humans do! The demons were banished into the Netherworld by the Eight Immortals a long time ago. Then they got out, and we banished them again! But Shendu possessed you, found this magic book, changed the past, and now none of that ever happened! Jackie: That's crazy, Jade. You're crazy! Humans ruling the world... Jade: It's true! We built cities, with cars and computers, and... my watch! Look at my watch!

Jackie: What's a 'watch'? [Jade activates the watch] Watch: Hey-hey-hey, I'm Marlon Moose! Jackie: Ah! Magic is outlawed! You know that! Jade: It's not magic, it's technology. Human technology! And you gave this watch to me! But I guess you wouldn't remember that... Jackie: Jade, if what you say is true, why don't I remember any of it? Jade: I don't know! [takes out the page corner] Maybe... (reading) 'And Jade Chan became a wily accomplice in the battle versus evil'. This is from the book, and it's about me! It didn't get rewritten and neither did I! That's why I remember, and... that's why I'm still wearing these clothes. [Shendu spots Jade] Shendu: You! Why do you not bow? Jackie (bowing): Your Scaliness, please excuse my slow-witted niece! [Shendu picks up Jackie by his ponytail] Shendu: If she were not excused, she would be in flames! Now fetch my dinner! [drops him] Jackie: Yes, master! [returns with a platter] Tasty treats for His Glorious Excellence! Shendu: What a good slave you make, Jackie Chan. Jackie: My joy is to serve you, master. Shendu: Keeping one's enemies close is not just wise, it is gratifying! Jade: Shendu treats you like a dog on a leash. I can't stand it! Jackie: Oh, what can I do? I am just a food servant! His slave! Jade: The Jackie Chan I knew was nobody's whipping boy. He was a hero! Jackie: He was? Jade: And you can be again, Jackie. Help me fix history. Help me rewrite the Book of Ages! [in Shendu's library] Uncle: Get out! Jade: Uncle! Uncle: Only Master's library boy is allowed in here! Jade: Uncle, we need your help! We're looking for a book! Uncle: Forbidden! These books are filled with magic! Even I am not allowed to read them! Jade: The Book of Ages! Uncle: Never heard of it! [Jade runs around] Jade: Are you sure? Maybe it's over here! Uncle: No it is not! Jade: How about here? Uncle: Not there! Jade: No, maybe over here? Uncle: No! I have been library boy for sixty years! I am sure! Jade: Really? Uncle: Really! Jade: In that case... [Jade knocks over a giant book and opens it] Uncle: Ah! Forbidden magic! Jade: Relax, it's just an atlas! [turns some pages] If the book's not here in Shendu's library, there is only one other place that it could be... Australia! Uncle: Ai-yah! No-man's-land! That continent is forbidden! Jackie: There is nothing there, Jade! Just a fortress! Jade: Tch! Fortresses are used to protect something! Duh! Uncle: But it is said that all who approach the fortress will be destroyed. Jade: Well, we have to get inside it somehow. Uncle: Why? Jade: Because Shendu used the Book of Ages to rewrite reality!

Uncle: Feh! That is crazy! [to Jackie] You do not believe her, do you? [Jackie sighs] Jackie: There is one thing that I believe. Demons ruling the world is a bad thing. Jade (to Uncle): I can prove I'm telling the truth. [Jade activates her watch] Watch: Hey-hey-hey, I'm Marlon Moose! Uncle: AI-YAH! [Jackie quickly covers his mouth] Jackie: Shh! You will alert the-[the Shadowkhan appear around them] Jade: --Shadowkhan! Jade: Get 'em, Jackie! Jackie: Get them? Jade: You know! Hyah! Jackie: Oh! The martial arts are outlawed! I do not know how to fight! Jade: Serious? [Jackie grabs Jade and runs] Jackie: But I do know how to run! [after a Shadowkhan's shuriken severs Jackie's ponytail] Jackie: Ah! My hair! Jade: You were due for a trim! [after being cornered by Shadowkhan] Jackie: Master's magic chamber! Entrance to this room is punished by... [the Shadowkhan grab them] Uncle (chanting): Yu mo gui gwai fai di zao, yu mo gui gwai fai di zao... [the Shadowkhan dissolved] Jackie: Uncle, you saved our-[Uncle hits him] Uncle: What choice did I have? You are family! Jade: A chi spell? Thought you weren't allowed to read the forbidden books? Uncle: I do not read! I...I skim! Jackie: We must leave, Uncle! It is only a matter of time before Shendu discovers you used magic to... Jade: ...kibosh his ninjas! Uncle: But where will we go? Jade: All aboard the Jade Express to Australia! Uncle: Oh, we are doomed! Even if we escaped from here, we have no way to journey to noman's-land! Jade: The talismans would sure help! Jackie, Uncle: What talismans? Jade: Uncle, let me reacquaint you with a little magic trick you once knew? [in Shendu's bed chambers, using Uncle's potion] Jade: This will let us grab the twelve talismans that give Shendu his magical powers! Uncle: There are no such things! [Jade reaches in and draws out a talisman] Jade: Believe me now? [Jackie reaches in as well; Shendu wakes] Shendu: Chan? [Shendu throws him aside, then breathes fire at him] Jade: Jackie?

"Demon World II" [after punching out Shendu] Jackie: How did I do that? Uncle: and why do you not catch fire? Jade: Dog makes you immortal, Ox makes you super-strong! What else we got? Speedy Rabbit, levitating Rooster, invisible Snake, and explosive Dragon. Ooh, good ones! [Shendu rouses] Jade: Maybe we better not try for the other half dozen! [on Shendu's flying carpet] Jade: Levitation plus speed equals flight. Jackie, Uncle: Huh? [the flying carpet takes off at super speed] Shendu: Centuries of history altered, your very memory erased, and still somehow you defy me! I shall find you, Chan, and I promise you I shall erase more than your memory! Jackie: Jade was right, Uncle! I am a hero! We can infiltrate the fortress, find the Book of ages, and correct history! [Uncle hits him] Uncle: There is a big army of ninjas at the fortress in No Man's Land! No magic trinkets will help us because we will be outnumbered! Jade: Uncle's right. Jackie: He is? Jade: If we're going to pull this off, we're going to need more muscle. We're going to need... the J-Team! [in Po Kong's realm] Uncle: I see no one here I would choose as my apprentice! [Jade spots Tohru] Jade: Well, look again! Jackie: He's... big! [Po Kong arrives] Uncle: But Po Kong is bigger! Po Kong: More salt for my meal, or I shall devour you all! Uncle: Our 'hero' cannot stop a demon that size! Jade: You're right.You do it! Uncle: Me? [Jade gives Uncle a spell book] Jade: There's only one surefire way to stop a demon, and that's to show them... the door! Jade: Jackie, leap and kick! Leap and kick! [Jackie leaps and kicks, knocking Po Kong to the ground] Jade: Uncle, hurry! Uncle: I do not have the symbol who defeated her! Jade (muttering to herself): Fire was sword, Water was gourd, Sky was flute... [Po Kong picks up Jackie] Po Kong: You are going to be scrumptious! Jade: Earth was flower, Wind was fan, Mountain was... [realizes] Drum! [looks up] Tohru! Tohru (startled): You-you know my name? Jade: Talk later! Bang the drum three times! Uncle (quickly): Yu mo gwai gui fai di zao, yu mo gwai gui fai di zao... [the portal opens, Po Kong is banished] Uncle: That was a very good spell!

[people cheers] [at his arena] Xiao Fung: No mercy, gladiators! Battle to the finish! [after Xiao Fung is banished] Enemy Gladiator: Finally, we can remove these ridiculous masks. El Toro: El Toro Fuerte never removes his mask! [in Hsi Wu's castle] Hsi Wu: What? No music while I bathe? Sing for me, my little caged song bird! Viper (dryly): Tweet. Tweet. [after Hsi Wu is banished] Viper: Who are you guys? Jade: Everybody, say hello to Viper -- the craftiest member of the J-Team! Viper: 'Team', huh? Jade: It's a wrap. The J-Team is reassembled, and Hsi Wu's singing career is down the drain! [lightning and thunder effects; Tchang Zu appears] Viper: Uh... guess you didn't know that Hsi Wu was scrubbing up because he was expecting company... Jackie: The Thunder Demon! [Jade drops her wristwatch] Watch: Hey-hey-hey, it's Marlon Moose! Jade: Heh, I guess time flies when you're having fun! Jade: Go Jackie! Paco: Your mouse man is good, Jade, but El Toro is the best! Jade: [pause] No time for that now, Paco. [after Shendu finds the Ox Talisman] Shendu: Chan! [the other demon sorcerers' images around him] Dai Gui: So he is behind this! Tso Lan: and things were going so well... Bai Tza: We were even almost beginning to like you, brother! Shendu: W-what do you mean? I was just coming to visit-Dai Gui: ---Hsi Wu? He has been banished to the netherworld! [Shendu steps on the watch] Watch: Hey-hey-hey it's Marlo-o-on M-o-o-o-se! Shendu: Technology? [puse] The child! Tso Lan: She somehow escaped the historical alteration! Bai Tza: and if she knows the history that was... Shendu: ....then Chan now knows of the Book! [Jackie is moping] Jade: What's up, Mr. Pouty-snout? Jackie: I do not belong with these heroes. The Ox made me strong! Without it, I'm-Jade: Hello! The talismns never made Jackie Chan a hero! You didn't even like to use them! Courage, brains, and heart are your secret weapons, and you've already got those! all you need is proper training. Jackie, I can teach you what you taught me. You game? Jackie: Game! Jade: Cool! First lesson; the ancient art of butt-whoop starts with breathing. The breath flows to the fingertips, then down to the toes...

Viper - Dragon Tohru - Sheep Jackie - Snake Uncle - Dog [in Australia] Jade: The Book lies behind those walls. Ready, team? Jackie: Let's make history. [Tohru runs around the building at super speed] Tohru: There is no way in. [Jade and Viper both scoff; then Viper uses the Dragon talisman to blow open the wall. Shadowkhan emerge] Viper: Guys in pyjamas? They don't look so tough! [the demons arrive] Jade: Quick, the spells! [Shendu vaporizes Uncle's spell ingredients] Shendu: What spells? [the demons laugh] [Tohru flees from Dai Gui with super-speed] Dai Gui: Shendu, and his accursed talismans! [Viper blasts Bai Tza with the Dragon Talisman] Viper: You're the only girl with tricks up her sleeve! [Bai Tza reforms] Viper: But you are the only one who can do that! Tso Lan: Behold, my mastery of gravity! El Toro: Behold, my mastery of... uh... pollo! Uncle: Jackie, help Uncle search! Stop fooling! Jackie: 'Fooling'? I'm not immortal! Uncle: Feh, excuses! [Shendu and the other demons arrived, carrying the defeated J-Team members] Shendu: Get away from that book! Surrender -- your team has been neutralized! Jade: Big whoop! If I can't find Shendu's changes, I'll make some of my own! [writing] 'and then Jackie grew 20 feet tall!' [Jackie becomes 20 feet tall] Jackie: Hyah! Paco: Now Jackie is the greatest! Dai Gui: The girl! Jade: [writing] "Here comes Super Tohru!" [Tohru becomes a superhero] "Say hello to RoboViper!" [Viper becomes an android] Viper: Like nuking fish in a barrel! [blasts Bai Tza] Uncle: You want to defeat the demons? Yes? Then write that Uncle banishes the demons already! Jade: Duh! [writes in the book] [Uncle begins casting the portal spells] Jackie: Bad day... for demons! [the demons are banished]

"The Lotus Temple" Jackie: Jade! I thought you were going to gather firewood. Jade: Hello, have you learned nothing from the movies? Whoever gets the firewood is always the creeping terror's first victim! Jackie: So that's what happened to the other little girl I sent out to gather firewood... Jade: Very funny. Monk: Ancient wisdom: crouching tiger is invisible until teeth flash in moonlight. Jade: Well, duh! Can we go home? Jackie: Jade, it is very important that we locate the Lotus Temple. Somewhere inside is the Scroll of Hung Chao. It holds inscriptions of great power. Monk: Ancient wisdom: words are breath that blows the fires of knowledge. Jackie: Yes! And our fire needs wood. [to Jade] Go! And stay in sight of the camp! Jade (to herself): 'Stay in sight'. Like I was going to [realizes that she's lost] ... get lost! Oh boy, this is exactly what happens before the creeping terror shows up. Jackie: Jade! Ugh, I told her to stay close! She never listens! Monk: Ancient wisdom: the foolish monkey chases its tail, and catches trouble. Jackie: ...I should have brought a map. Jade! Xu Lin: I humbly beg forgiveness. Jade: Huh? Xu Lin: It is the power of the Lotus Temple that changes me. I am forced to guard it against all intruders. Jade: Yeah, well, you should put up a 'Beware of Monster' sign or something! Xu Lin: If you heard my tale, you would understand. [starts crying] Please! Jade: Aw, man! I'll listen, as long as you don't get all 'rraargghr' on me., Xu Lin: Five years ago, on an evening like this, I wandered into the forest against my father's wishes. It grew dark, and I was soon lost in the bamboo. Jade: Same here! Xu Lin: Then, under the light of the full moon, the Lotus Temple appeared. I thought it was a miracle, saving me from the cold. The next morning, with the first rays of the sun, the Temple began to disappear. And I vanished along with it. Jade: Hold the cell phone! Are you saying that this place only exists at night? Xu Lin: Yes, and only under a full moon. Anyone trapped within when the sun rises becomes a Temple Guardian and may never leave again. Jade: Pretty good fairy tale, but there's one hole in the story. Why weren't you attacked by a Temple Guardian? Xu Lin: The previous Guardian found the means to escape. I've searched five years for that secret but have not found it. I miss my family so much... Jade: Hmm, I'm all about beating the system. Let's see... you only go monster-y about intruders, right? Well, if you ask for my help, I'm not intruding. I'm helping! [the Monk pulls aside the bamboo to reveal the Lotus Temple] Monk: Perhaps the little monkey is closer than you think. Jackie: Ah, the Lotus Temple. Are you coming? Monk: I will wait here. I would not want to... intrude. Jackie: You knew about the Temple Guardian! [snatches the Scroll of Hung Chao from the Monk] Monk: Of course! Ancient wisdom: the worm realizes that he is bait only after the fish bites! [snatches the Scroll back]

[the Monk prepares to blast Jackie, Jade, and Xu Lin] Monk: Ancient wisdom: the cornered rat finds peace... in eternity! Xu Lin: Ohh, leave me Jade! Escape while you can! Jade: No, we're going to find a cure, or an antidote, or something! Jackie: We will try! Xu Lin: Ugh, Jade, I'm changing. Jade: No biggie. Stay calm; just try to remember: I'm your guest, and Uncle Jackie... Xu Lin: He is... invited... Jade: Good girl! [Jackie is grappling with the Monk] Jackie: No more palm-blasting! Monk: You think that is the only power granted by the Scroll of Hung Chao? [chanting] Hai shan! Hai shan! Hai shan! [a suit of armor comes to life and attacks Jackie] [watching Jackie getting beat up by the armor] Monk: Ancient wisdom: the wise man never walks out on free entertainment! Jade: Uncle Jackie, the sun's coming up! Jackie: Good! Jade: You don't understand! The Temple vanishes at dawn, and anyone inside goes with it! Jackie: How many crazy rules does this Temple have? [inscription on his hands vanish] Jackie: Heh, easy come, easy go. Xu Lin: Oh thank you for freeing me! Jackie: At least the Scroll of Hung Chao was destroyed. No one else will learn its dangerous secrets. Jade: You know, I'll bet we could redraw those inscriptions on your hand. I mean, it'd take a few tries... Jackie: Jade, playing with magic is too dangerous. Xu Lin: I only hope to once again see my parents, and have nothing more to do with magic ever again! Jade: Come on, where's your spirit of adventure, Xu Lin? Jackie: Ancient wisdom: wise monkey knows when to stifle spirit of adventure and concentrate on schoolwork. Jade: You just made that up! Jackie: No. It's old. Very old! "The Lost City of the Muntabs" Jackie: I cannot believe I am stuck in the jungle with such a spoiled brat! Jade: You invited me! Jackie (looking at Smith): I was talking about him! (to Smith) Mr. Smith, please, we must stay together! There are many dangers in the bush! Smith: Yes, yes, so you keep saying. (to Butler) Hop to it, Larsen! Jade: Why don't we ditch Frick and Frack, and have some real fun. Go swinging with the monkeys, or wrestle a crocodile! What do you say, Big J? Jackie: I am sorry, Jade, but you must learn that growing up sometimes means having to do things that are not fun! Jade: Like guiding obnoxious jerks through the jungle just 'cause they give lots of money to the

museum? Jackie: ...yes. Jade: In that case, I never want to grow up. [pause] What am I saying? I can't wait to grow up! Get my own car, cell phone -- which, now that you mention it... Jackie: I didn't mention it. Jackie: Throw me your camera! Smith: That is a $4000 Zoltex with a hand-ground German lens and a-[Jade snatches the camera and throws it to Jackie] Jade: What's so great about these Muntabs anyway? Smith: Ancient legends speak of the Muntabs' extraordinary health and long life. Oh, just imagine what secrets their artifacts might reveal! Jackie: I suggest we turn back before the storm gets any worse. Smith: I refuse to give up so easily! I can't! I won't! Smith: I have found it, Larsen. The Lost City of the Muntabs! Larsen: Bully for you, sir. [Jackie runs away] Smith: What is he, a coward? Jade: It's called 'capturing the high ground'. Martial arts 101, hello? Jade: You don't know who you're messing with! Once my Uncle Jackie gets ahold of you, you're history! Jackie: Jade, please! You're angering them. Larsen: A bit late for that, I daresay. [Jackie does the fire dance poorly] Chief: Honored guest spoke truth. Not good dancer! Chief: Chalice filled with water from altar gives Muntabs eternal life. Stay young forever. Jade (to girl) So... you weren't kidding. 230? Abeela: I will be 231 next week. Jade: Uh... happy birthday! Chief: Without chalice, we will grow old. Jade: And Smith will be immortal? 2000+ years of obnoxiousness? Yuck! Smith (peering into chalice): Everything I've ever hoped for, Larsen. Right here, right now: eternal youth, eternal life. Larsen: Perhaps you'd like me to sample it first, sir. To make sure it's safe. Smith: Oh, no, that won't be necessary . Oh, you don't think I'd leave you out of this, do you, old friend? After all your years of faithful service? Larsen: Well, I had hoped... Smith: Larsen, I want you by my side, to serve me forever. Larsen: Oh goody. Teenage Smith: My camera! Completely ruined! Well, that's it, Larsen. I'm docking your wages for the next seventy-five years! Teenage Larsen: Yes, sir. Jade: Uh, Jackie, that was Smith's map. Jackie: Yes. No one will ever find the Muntabs again. Jade: Hello! How are we supposed to find our way back through the jungle?

Infant Smith: Well, Larsen, how do I look? Infant Larsen: Very youthful, sir. Infant Smith: I, uh, think I need to be changed. Infant Larsen: Oh goody. "Scout's Honor" [while searching the caverns] Jackie (reading from map): 'One more thing... go through archway then go thirty more paces'. [keeps walking] Ah, the Sorcerer's Eye! Just where Uncle said it would be! And the inscriptions are intact! The museum will be very pleased to--! [a secret doorway opens up, revealing a statue wearing the Eye of Aurora; Jackie reaches for it, activating a trap] Jackie: Aaah! Bad day! Bad day! [Vanessa Barone uses her whip to snatch the necklace] Jackie: Ah! Who are you? Vanessa Barone: The new owner of that necklace. Give! Jackie: No! This artifact belongs in a museum! Sorry! Vanessa Barone: Oh, you will be! [yanks on the whip] Jackie: Why are you doing this? You seem like such a nice lady. Vanessa Barone: Been called a lot of things: Relic hunter, mercenary, thief. But Vanessa Barone: 'nice lady'? That is a new one! The necklace! Jackie: No -- it belongs in a museum! Woman: Got to admit, Sal, Venice is a nice change! No street crime, no weirdoes, no-[Jackie crawls out of a sewer; the woman gasps] Jackie: Heh, guide book was wrong: no subway in Venice! [on a gondola] Vanessa Barone: Know what I'm holding here, paisan? A key to all the riches in the world! Sailor: Eh, no speak English! "Viva Las Jackies" [while falling] Finn: Dudes, we have powers! Ratso: Ohhh yeah! Chow: Sweet! Uncle: Room service? Yes. Please send up one vial of eel saliva, three jars of powdered duck feet, and a pair of moose antlers. What? What kind of hotel does not have eel saliva? Jackie Yin (to Jackie Yang's head): Hey, I have a zit. Get off of my body, or I'll pop you! Jackie Yang: I do not wish to harm you, but this is my body too! Jade: I didn't let the Yin-Yang power finish separating you. So one head's your dark side, and the other is... Jackie Yang: Light! That's me! Jade: There's only one sure way to finish putting your heads back together. Now we really have to find those tigers! Jackie Yang: I do not see the tiger! Maybe we should split up! Jackie Yin: ... So I got all the brains.

Jackie Yin: Three jokers, and Jackies are wild. Who's in? Jackie Yang: Not me! Ratso: Heads? You lose! Uncle: Room service? I have been waiting for-Jackie Yang: Uncle! Thank goodness you are-Uncle: Jackie! How could you leave Uncle at a shabby hotel with no eel saliva? Jackie Yin: Pull your tongue out of your mouth and wring out the spit. Uncle: You call Uncle an eel? Jackie Yang: Uncle, I'm sorry. Jackie Yin: No I'm not. Jackie Yang: Yes I am! Jackie Yin: No I'm not. Jackie Yang: Yes I am! Jackie Yin: No I'm not. Jackie Yang: Yes I am! Uncle: Jackie, why do you babble like a crazy person? Jackie Yin, Yang: Because I have two heads! Jackie Yin: Hurry, fat head! Jackie Yang: Hey, our heads are the same size! Jackie Yin: Ah! Free at last! Daolon Wong: You cannot defeat me, old man! Uncle: Who are you calling "old", bag of bones? Daolon Wong: Your half-baked spells cannot defeat me. Uncle: I blame room service! Jackie Yin: No! I don't wanna go back! Jackie Yang: Come on, we belong together! "Aztec Rat Race" Chow: Too bad your niece won't be showing up with the federales any time soon. El Toro: Help has arrived, amigo! Dark Chi Warriors: El Toro! El Toro: You... did not mention that there would be more than... one rat.... er, not that I am bothered! Quetzalcoatl: Who dares trespass in my lair? El Toro: The Talisman power? Jackie: Motion to the motionless... Quetzalcoatl: Well? Jackie: We are not trespassers, your lordship, sir. We are... uh... [Jade traps the Noble Rat] Jade: Gotcha! Jackie: Pest control! Yes! A deity such as yourself cannot have rats in his lair. Most unbecoming! Paco: The statue can shoot fire from his hands? Jade: God of the Sun, duh!

Finn: Chan had a masked crimefighter with him, Your Wongship. Chow: The sun was in our eyes! Ratso: We need bigger weapons! Daolon Wong: Excuses, excuses! I see that if I wish this task accomplished, I must do it myself! Finn: That's cool! We'll wait here, rest up, order some chi pizza... Daolon Wong: Hah! You three shall accompany me and watch! Perhaps you will learn something... Paco: The statue can fly too? Jade: God of the sky, duh! Quetzalcoatl: Flee no more, Xolotl! [Quetzalcoatl traps El Toro, Jackie, and Paco in a cage of unbreakable vines] Paco: The statue can grow unbreakable vines? Jade: God of-Paco: I know. Agriculture. Duh! Daolon Wong: The rat is mine, and like the rat, many enemies have been caged, apparently by this able-bodied warrior! Finn: Yeah, well, maybe giant lizard guy has better powers than us. Ever think of that? Ratso: Yeah... Daolon Wong: Excuses! Daolon Wong: You just stand there? Finn: Hey, 'watch and learn'? Quetzalcoatl: You there! Daolon Wong: Your power of light is no match for the blackest chi! [Daolon Wong blasts him] Quetzalcoatl: Dark magic... then you are truly Xolotl! [looks at Jade] You then... Daolon Wong: See? The first lesson of battle: surprise the enemy! Jade: Surprise! [Jade grabs the rat from Daolon Wong] Daolon Wong: What? Stop her! Finn: Little girl? We can handle that! Chow: Hi! We're your new neighbors. Can we borrow a cup of... rat? Jade: ... how about a heaping helping of moose? [Hundreds of Super Mooses appear] Mooses: Da da da... antler action! Quetzalcoatl: Stop, Xolotl! I shall right my wrongs! Daolon Wong: You shall try! Finn: Okay, it's on! El Toro: No, it is over. Daolon Wong: Give me the rat, or I will scatter its power back to the winds! Jade: I don't care if he isn't cute. I won't let you hurt him! Daolon Wong: Very well, child! Quetzalcoatl: And I do not care that she is not a goddess. I will not let you harm her! Quetzalcoatl: Such power within this small creature... and such courage within you. With heroes such as you protecting the land from the forces of darkness, I am content to return to my proper place. [touches the Noble Rat] Quetzalcoatl bids you, farewell.

"Monkey A Go-Go" Mahoney: "To free me of glitches, and put you in stitches, this merry ape begs: pull my leg". Jackie: The Monkey Talisman! Uncle: Its power! You destroyed the Talismans! Daolon Wong: I will seize control of the chi waves, novice! My power is far greater than-Uncle [recording]: One more thing: phbbbt!! One more thing: phbbbtt! One more thing: phbbbtt! Monkey King: Not funny? Not funny? I'm the Grand Poobah of ha ha! Tell me where I can find your pals, or I'll show you "not funny"! Uncle: To find the monkey in any shape or form, you must feel the power within the peel! Uncle: Perhaps we should find some way of communicating! Jade: How? Haiku doesn't speak English, and we don't speak Monkey. Monkey King: No problem! I just happen to be bilingual! Monkey King: The King is back. [like Elvis] Uh-huh-huh-huh! Uncle: How did you know where to find us? Monkey King: Let's just say... someone you know ratted you out! Jackie: You know, this isn't a very humorous revenge for the... King of Comedy. Monkey King: ...sweet simpering simian, you have a point! We're gonna wrap it up in a luau! For the main course, hams-a-la-Chan... [sprinkes pepper on Uncle] with a little tenderizer for the old bird, of course! Monkey King: Go fish! [Haiku changes into a fish] Monkey King: Hey, that was a figure of speech! Monkey King: Uh-oh, my simian senses are tingling! Jade: We want our monkey back! Daolon Wong: Talisman power, be mine! Monkey King: Paws off the fur, Shakespeare! Jade: I never thought I'd be rooting for Daolon Wong over anybody. [Daolon Wong blasts Jade, Uncle, and Tohru] Jade: On second thought, go Monkey King! Daolon Wong: Monkey King? Ah, I should have recognized the antics of the famed prankster puppet made flesh! Monkey King: And I got a payback gig with an exploding volcano finale that you're messing up! Daolon Wong: So, why do I see no lava? Monkey King: Huh? [reads list] I'm still three pounds of wood short of a gusher! Daolon Wong: Then, for your lousy spell-making, you shall return to wood! [blasts the Monkey King] Monkey King: Everybody's a critic! Mac (to Mahoney puppet): Come on, buddy, say something! [Mahoney returns to normal] Mahoney: ...get your hand out of my shirt, Mac.

"When Pigs Fly" Finn: Guess the chicken can't fly. Question is, Chan, can you? Jackie: Jade, you are supposed to be on observation! Jade: I was! How do you think I observed you getting creamed? Jade: Another mission? Where are we going this time? Paris? Moscow? Tahiti? Jackie: ...Arline, Kansas. Jade (bored): Yee haw. Jackie: Jade, you are supposed to be guarding the-Jade: Eggbert wanted to hang with the other white meat! Jackie (to farmers): Can't we just talk about this? Jade: Maybe they don't know how to talk? Buford: My brother E.B. graduated Stanford Phi Beta Kappa! E.B.: Buford here is a renowned nuclear physicist! Farmer MacDonald: Ain't nobody takin' my pig, Mr. Archaeologist! Jackie: I'm sorry, I owe you a scarecrow! Buford: I thought gallus domesticus was a flightless bird! Farmer MacDonald: And I think that flying rooster wins blue-ribbon at the state fair! Daolon Wong: Gan! Ran! Chui! [Dark Chi warriors appear] Farmer MacDonald: ... what city are you fellers from, anyhow? Farmer MacDonald: What in Sam Hill's nanny is going on here? Jackie: The animals have magic powers, and dark forces have come to claim them. Farmer MacDonald: Magic? Well, why didn't you just say so in the first place? Jade: Jackie, get those swine! [Mordecai grunts] Jade: Heh. Sorry! Ratso: Ready to buy the farm, Chan? Jade: Let us go, power hog! Daolon Wong: No, but with the power of the hog, I shall reduce you both to ashes! Daolon Wong: Your feeble cage cannot withstand the burning gaze of my... er... heat beam eyes? Uncle: My cage is forged of good chi, feeble one! Daolon Wong: I will incinerate you, next time! "The Invisible Mom" Uncle: Do not even breathe. Cobras are very poisonous. Jackie: I... know... Uncle: Not our snake. Put basket down! Jackie: ...how?

Uncle: Quickly, of course! Jade: Whoa, Mrs. T? What brings you to bizarro-world? Uncle: And when are you leaving? Tohru: Mother! What a coincidence bumping into you all the way in India! Tohru's Mother: Coincidence? You invited me! Uncle: Tohru, you did not tell me that you invite Spider Woman? [Jackie stumbles past] See? Even Jackie moans with displeasure at her arrival! Ratso: I'm not sure who's dizzier: Chan or us? Uncle: The Talisman power of invisibility lies within the snake... within the egg. Jade: Ooh, Uncle, you so sly! Tohru's Mother: Too much garlic! Uncle: No such thing: "too much garlic"! Uncle knew you were vampire! Tohru's Mother: Junk seller! Uncle: Blood sucker! Jade: Told you the dark chi dudes didn't get her. Uncle: Of course they did not. She is more fearsome than they! Chow: I know three dark warriors who are finally about to make Daolon Wong a happy wizard! Finn: Uh, let's not be hasty. This snake can make us invisible... Ratso: We can sneak into any movie we want for free! Chow: Hmph. Finn: If old crazy eyes can't see us, we can sneak up and stomp the chi out of him! Chow: ...and force him to turn us back into our normal old selves! Finn: Talisman power... ho! Ratso: Uh, I can still see us? Finn: Because we're all invisible! Chow: Ohh! Ratso: I was never any good at science! Tohru: Do not worry, Mother. Sensei will find a way to make you visible again. Uncle: Why? She is more pleasing to the eyed this way! Tohru's Mother: This is my choice, Tohru. I will remain invisible, so that I may always protect my baby. Tohru: Always? Chow: End of the trail! Tohru: For you! Tohru's Mother: I told you, no fighting the forces of darkness! Tohru: ...not even the skinny one? Chow (mocking): That's right, Tohru! Listen to mommy. Tohru: Sometimes I can take care of myself, mother. And you. "Sheep In, Sheep Out" Jackie: You are supposed to be at the bed and breakfast, where there is no Daolon Wong, no Dark Chi warriors... Jade: No cable! Jade: Baa baa black sheep, have you any magic?

Finn: Chan? I'll have the roast lamb! Ratso (to Jade): Ha ha, you've been fleeced! Daolon Wong: I have no further use for those who allow themselves to be waylaid by unconscious livestock! Daolon Wong (to Shadowkhan): Awaken from shadow! Serve your new master! Jade: Cool specs! And they're 3D. Uncle: They are 4D, Jade, and not a toy! Jade: Whoa, Uncle, your spells are getting more awesome! Uncle: Must keep up with forces of darkness! Uncle: The Cube of Hang Shan! It absorbs astral forms! Jackie: The Shadowkhan are working for Daolon Wong? Jade: Larry, Curly, and Moe must be on spring break. [while in the magical prison] Chow: No exit... Ratso: And no magazines. Uncle: You are the first line of defense, and Shadowkhan cannot physically penetrate a Tai Ho Han circle as long as Jade sleeps. Jade: Hurry, Uncle! Uncle: You two run; Uncle will power walk! Daolon Wong (to Jackie and Jade): A little finishing spell to seal your physical forms makes both of you as good as ghosts! Jackie: Uncle, we're right here! Jade: Hello, he can't see you! Jackie: Then how will he know where we are? Uncle: Daolon Wong now possesses the power of astral projection which he has inflicted upon Jackie and Jade and then applied a finishing spell so that they cannot return to their bodies! Jade: ...and you doubted him! Uncle: Jade is better at being you than you, Jackie! Jade (in Jackie's body): Who da man? I da man! Daolon Wong: Shadowkhan, pah! Gan! Ran! Chui! Finn: Big D, dude, I know you'd take us back! Chow: Did you lose weight? Looks good! Ratso: You should apologize to us. Daolon Wong: I will pulverize you if you do not assist me in reversing the old man's finishing spell! "Rabbit Run" Finn: D. Master Wong wants the power of super-speed, Chan. Ratso: So hand it over, pronto! Jackie: But we haven't even found it yet!

Finn: Be that way! Jade: Nice catch! Ratso: Heh, thanks! That was a close one! Uncle: So, the Dark warrior wants a piece of Uncle--AH! [Uncle Ratso: Heh, a geezer in a geyser! Finn: I'll teach you to mess with Finn 2.0. [Uncle vanishes Finn] Uncle: And I will teach you to mess with Uncle: Original Recipe! Jackie: It is very important that we locate a particular rabbit. Man: Well, you're barking up the wrong tree, partner. I said this was jackalope country! Jackie: Look, we both know that jackalopes are rabbits who wear fake antlers for the tourists! Man: No sirree, I assure you that Douglas jackalopes are the real deal! [Jackie takes antlers off of rabbit's head] Man: Now that was an ugly thing to do. Coach: Hey, Chip! Chip: Ready for me, Coach? Coach: How about some H20 for the troops? Chip (disappointed): Right away, Coach... Chip: It's tough enough getting Coach to take me seriously. I don't need your help in that department. Jade: Tch. Listen, Chip; there's one rule Jade Chan lives by, it's this: if Coach won't give you a shot, you have to put yourself in the game! Chip: You're just a little girl. What do you know about football? Jade: Let's just say my coach doesn't always put me in the game, but I know you can't make the big plays from the sidelines. Chip: Totally! I'm as good as the other players. Well, I could be faster... Jade: Faster, schmaster! I can see you got what it takes! Chip: You can? Jade: Sure thing! So are you just going to sit there and look pretty, or are you going to belt this pigskin to the moon! Chip: Go Jackalopes! Uncle: Jackie! You are terrible rabbit-catcher! Chip: Whoa! Lucky! [sees Daolon Wong] Chip: Sir, you are in possession of Warren Oats Memorial High football team property! [Daolon Wong turns and hisses] Chip: W-what school are you from? Jackie: I will not bring it back later thank you! Chip: How many schools are trying to nab it? Daolon Wong: Because of you, I have lost the rabbit? Chip: Um... i-it's a jackalope... Chip: Lucky is more than lucky! He's magic! Daolon Wong: Gan! Ran! Chui!

[Dark Warriors wappear] Chow: Hey, football! Finn: Bonding time! Ratso: We knew you were one of us! Daolon Wong: The rabbit! Finn: Let's win one for the Wongster! Ratso: Go Dark Warriors! Chow: Let's get 'em! [sees Uncle losing his duel to Daolon Wong] Jade: Uh oh; Uncle needs an assist! [to cheeleaders] Hey, girls, wanna learn a new cheer? Jade: Gimme a Di! Cheerleaders: Di! Jade: Gimme a Zhao! Cheerleaders: Zhao! Jade: Put that together and what do you have? Cheerleaders (chanting): Yu mo gwai gui fai di zhao! Yu mo gwai gui fai di zhao! Yu mo gwai gui fai di zhao! [Uncle's spell destroys Daolon Wong's spell] Uncle: Go Jackalopes! "Little Valmont, Big Jade" [Daolon Wong and Valmont bump into each other in the street] Daolon Wong: The supplies for my locator spell! You shall suffer for what you have done! Valmont: What I have done? You turned my Enforcers to samurai zombies! I've been reduced to performing my own dirty work! Return Finn, Ratso, and Chow to me at once! Daolon Wong: Huh! Why would Daolon Wong heed the demands of an insignificant pickpocket? Valmont: Because I'm bigger than you! Daolon Wong: Oh? [Daolon Wong blasts Valmont] Little Valmont: Ah! Daolon Wong: Not any more! [vanishes] Little Valmont: Blast! Jackie: Ugh, Uncle, have you ever considered traveling lightly? Uncle: Uncle is traveling lightly! Brought only one cauldron! Little Valmont: What are you doing here? Jade: What are you doing small? Little Valmont: Brilliant! Now I have a paper cut! Uncle: Tohru, it is your former boss. Tohru: Uh... half of him! Jade: News flash! The talismans are history! The Horse we're after is an animal Little Valmont: You'd best watch your tone with me, child! Jade: Why should I, child? Little Valmont: Because I am bigger than you! Jackie: While Uncle and I search for the Horse, you two will wait here and stay out of trouble. Little Valmont: Now see here, just because I look like a child doesn't mean that you can treat me like one! Jackie: I am treating you like a criminal. Tohru will treat you like a child. Tohru: Now, are you going to be a good little boy?

Jade: Tell Tohru you're sorry! Little Valmont: Why should I? Jade: Because I'm bigger than you! Little Valmont: Ah! You are! Jade: I am? [Jade measures herself] Jade: Two whole inches! My grow-up spell is working! Tohru: Grow up spell? Daolon Wong: Gan! Ran! Chui! Finn: I'm Finn, he's Ratso, that's Chow. Would it kill you to learn our names! Finn: All right, Stretch. Get off your high horse and-Little Valmont: Unhand me, you buffoons! Chow: Whoa! Finn: It's Big V! Ratso: And he's mini! Little Valmont: Indeed. I attempted to liberate you three, and that rancid prune of a wizard burdened me with this juvenile curse! Finn: Whoa, you tried to rescue us? Ratso: Awww! Chow: We didn't know you cared! Uncle: Jackie! Stop horsing around! Little Valmont: See what you've reduced me to? I'm helping Chan! [Daolon Wong grabs him] Little Valmont: Oh, be careful, I have a paper cut, you know! Daolon Wong: A mere flesh wound is the least of your worries! [prepares to blast Valmont] [The Dark Chi weapons block Daolon Wong] Finn: Ease up, sweaty. No one touches Little V with us around! Chow: At least Valmont bothered to learn our names! Ratso: And he's so cute now! Boss! Daolon Wong: I am not your boss! I am your master! Little Valmont: Well, isn't that just dandy! The one time I want Chan to win, he makes a hash of it! Daolon Wong: With the power of healing, I shall become invincible! [to giant Jade] Finn: You're going down, Queen Kong! Ratso: The bigger they are, the harder they-[Jade stomps them] Little Valmont: They didn't see that coming? Honestly, why did I ever want them back? Jade: Just call me... Jade-Zilla! Little Valmont (to Royal Medicine): Right then, break the curse, make me big, squander my youth! Come on, heal me! [talisman power activates; the paper cut vanishes] That's it? You healed my paper cut? I am still a child, you incompetent nag! "The Ox-Head Incident" Uncle: We must bring the Ox to the safety of the Ben Shui temple before the forces of darkness

descend upon us! Finn: Consider yourself descended upon, Gramps! Finn: Say good-bye, Chan! [The Dark Chi warriors get crushed] Jackie: Uh... good-bye, Chan? [The Dark Chi warriors reappear in Daolon Wong's castle] Ratso: Uh, where'd they go? Chow: Ugh, we blew it again! Finn: All in favor of keeping this setback quiet, say Aye! All: Ay-argh! [Daolon Wong appears] Daolon Wong: Give me just one reason why I should not destroy you instantly! Finn: Cause... things are about to change? Chow: No more embarassing defeats! Ratso: Cross our hearts and hope to-Hak Foo: Aargh! Daolon Wong: Ollie-ollie Oxen Free! Daolon Wong: Zhen! Jackie, Jade: Hak Foo? Daolon Wong: So, you have met? Acquaint yourself to the new you! Hak Foo: My pleasure... master! Hak Foo: Phoenix flies to moon! Meteor brings mass extinction! Tohru: Hak Foo! This is where you go poof! [Tohru drops a boulder on Hak Foo] Hak Foo: I do not 'poof'. Daolon Wong: Fool! The Orb of Guan Lo will reveal your secrets, exposing those thoughts you hold most dear! [Mung bean sandwich appears] Daolon Wong: What? Uncle: Uncle is hungry? Daolon Wong: I shall peel back the layers... [Uncle spanking Daolon Wong] Daolon Wong: What is this? Uncle: Your destiny, evil one! Daolon Wong: Why has your incessant mouth suddenly grown silent? [turns around, sees Jackie] Jackie (imitating Uncle): One more thing! Oh... who am I kidding? [runs off] Daolon Wong: Gan! Ran! Chui! Stop Chan! Finn: Who, us? Ratso: Why don't you ask your precious Hak Foo? Daolon Wong: Why don't I turn you inside out! [blasts them] Finn: We're on it! Ratso: You say 'jump'... Chow: ...we say 'how high?' Uncle: Book is only a guide! Good chi wizard makes spell his own! Jackie: Look at yourself, Hak Foo. Daolon Wong has made you his lackey, his slave. Is this how

you really want to be? A freak? Hak Foo: Yes! "Animal Crackers" Ms. Hartman: It seems every other student managed to prepare an exhibit for tomorrow's school fair. What is your excuse this time, Jade? Jade: Um, would you believe I had to rescue a super-strong ox from the dark warriors? Drew: What, no invisible rabbit? Jade: Put a sock in it, Drew! And it's a super-speed rabbit! Ms. Hartman: Jade! Luckily you still have one day to put an exhibit tomorrow. Which shouldn't be too much of a problem, considering your imagination. Drew: You could always bring in your magic animals! [Everyone laughs] Jade (thoughtfully): Yes I could, couldn't I? Daolon Wong: My enemies possess 9 talisman powers, and I only possess two? I've got you to thank for that! Ratso: Hak Foo! Finn: Sheesh! Chow: Get with the program, will you? Daolon Wong: I meant all of you! Pah! I must locate the remaining animal, and find a way to tip the balance of power in my favor! Jackie: Oh, Jade, have you come up with anything for the fair yet? I cannot wait to come see! Jade: The f-fair? Uh, you really don't want to come. Jackie: I don't? Jade: No! I decided to make an exhibit of, uh, mashed potatoes sculptures. Snoresville. Well, gotta cook up some spuds! Later! Captain Black: Potato sculptures? Jackie: Young Jade has a very unique mind. [at the fair] Jade (to the animals): Now, remember, ix-nay on the agic-may, okay? If anything goes wrong, Uncle Jackie will ground me for life! Drew: No way! A petting zoo? Jade: Look, but don't touch. Drew: Where did you get all of these? Jade: These, Drew, just happen to the animals I-- borrowed from my cousin, the zookeeper! Drew: Hey, these are the magic animals, aren't they? Jade: No! I mean, heh, you got me, Drew. I was making all that 'magic' stuff up the whole time! Heh heh, me and my imagination! Daolon Wong: Ah, yes, reveal yourself to me. The... Dog? There must be some mistake! They are vulnerable again? [at the fair] Ratso: Ooh, games! Who wants to play whack-a-mole? Hak Foo: We are here to whack real animals! And this time, we will not fail! Drew: Come on, Jade, I've never seen a magic animal trick! Jade: Shouldn't you be annoying people at your own booth? [after all of the noble animal powers activate at once] Drew: Whoa! I wonder what else Jade's been saying that's true? Super Moose: Evil on the loose; here comes Super Moose!

Jade: Heh, I bet you're wondering why all the animals-Jackie: I know why. Uncle: Which way did they go? Jackie: Every way! Tohru: We must split up! [Tohru and Uncle leave] Jackie: Remain here! Jade: But Jackie, there are nine animals, four evil dudes, and only three of you! We need to even things-Jackie: Jade, you have caused enough trouble. [Jackie runs off] Jade: You're right. I have. [pause] Which is why I need to make things right. Uncle: Hand me the Tiger! Finn: Funny, I was gonna say the same thing. Jackie: No no, do not eat the astroturf! Chow: What do you know, Chan? You're on a roll! [rolls logs down at him] [Sheep releases Chow and Jackie's astral forms] Chow: We're on astral turf! Hak Foo: I will take the Rat! Super Moose: Dun-dun-dun! Antler Action! [Super Moose slams into Hak Foo] Jade: You will take the moose, on the jaw! Rabbit (Tohru and Ratso) Rat (Jade and Hak Foo) Sheep (Jackie and Chow) Tiger (Uncle and Finn) "Re-Enter The Dragon" Uncle: As long as Daolon Wong roams the Earth, nothing remains safe. Daolon Wong: Your answer, most malevolent of fire breathers? Shendu: It would seem that you have summoned me merely to humor me, for to obtain the power of combustion you would require a living, earth-bound dragon, which I am not. Daolon Wong: Hmm, you underestimate my talents, Lord Shendu. As the most malevolent of dark chi masters, I know a multitude of ancient spells, some of which might restore you. Shendu: Ah! Then you may have my rightful power, Daolon Wong... if you find the spell that will allow me to live again! Uncle: The making of talisman is very tricky business! The spell which created them hve been lost for thousands of years! Daolon Wong: Return to us, Shendu! Rise again! Uncle: If the locator detects a dragon now, someone must be conjuring one. Jade: And I'll give you one guess as to who that someone is! Daolon Wong: Gan! Ran! Chui! Zhen!

Ratso: Hey, backyard barbecue! Chow: What are we grilling? Hak Foo: Jackie Chan! Finn: Let's tenderize him! Hak Foo: Hurricane kick! Earthquake punch! Asteroid belt! Meteor pummels mountain! [Hak Foo lands in the lava and disappears] Jade: Cold shower? [after returning to life] Shendu: Greetings, everyone! It is great to be back! Finn: Yo, Shen-Dude! Chow: Uh, long time no... breathe? Ratso: Happy, uh, re-birthday! Daolon Wong: Yes! My prize approaches! The power of combustion-Shendu: --belongs to me! [Shendu shoves him out of the way and absorbs the power himself] Jade: Mega bad day! Shendu: Ahh, feel the burn! Daolon Wong: But, brother of darkness, we had an arrangement! Shendu: I may be a noble dragon, but I am also a demon sorcerer... and not known for keeping promises! Daolon Wong: I still possess two talisman powers with which to destroy you! [Shendu begins absorbing his powers away from him when he attacks] Shendu: Levitation! Heat beam eyes! What thoughtful birthday presents! And you will tell me where to retrieve my other powers, after I have had the pleasure of quick-frying Jackie-- what? Agent: Sir! We have a bogey approaching from the perimeter! [spots Shendu on camera] A big one! Captain Black: This is it! If the demon breaches the outer defenses, we make our stand here. Protect that vault! Uncle: Stop fooling! Help Uncle research! Captain Black: Everyone, grab a book! Jackie: Jade! Are you crazy? If anything has ever been 'too dangerous', this is it! Jade: Tch. Where the pooch goes, I go! Shendu: One cannot begin anew without burning a few bridges! Uncle: Hot-cha! Captain Black: You found a way to defeat Shendu? Uncle: Shendu not important! I found a way to defeat the person who knows how to defeat Shendu, even though that person does not yet know he knows! [Everybody looks confused] Jade: Hey! What do you get when you cross an ox with a rabbit? Shendu: Huh? Jade: A ram! Daolon Wong: Gan! Ran! Chui! Zhen! [outfits them in armor] Daolon Wong: Prepare for battle! Chow: Whoa! Finn: We rock! Ratso: I'm feeling prepared!

Daolon Wong: That thieving lizard Shendu will pay dearly for his betrayal! [after losing their dark chi powers] Hak Foo: We are weak! Ratso: We are human. Chow: We are free! [Captain Black holds up handcuffs] Finn: Nuh-uh! Busted. Shendu: No! No! Not again! "Mother of All Battles" Jade: You've been acting all weird lately. Come on, you can tell me. It's Uncle, right? That garlic smell? Tohru: It's... my mother. Jade: What? Is she sick or--you have a mom? Tohru: She is arriving from Japan to attend the expo. She is a big fan of Kare Noke and her Yodeling Kabukis. Jade: The screechy country singer? Yuck! But what's so 'yuck' about a visit from your Mom? Tohru: Oh. I am the black sheep. All I have ever wanted was for my mother to be proud of me. Jade: She will be! Look at you! You're handsome and... big! You've got a-- um, you're big! Tohru: You do not understand. My mother is very hard to please. [Tohru's mother arrives] Tohru: Mommy! Jackie, Uncle: Mommy? Mama Tohrus: This where you live? Ugh, you gave up good job with nice Mr. Valmont for this? Jade: 'Nice'? Hello, doesn't she know Valmont's a crook! Tohru: No, and please do not tell her! Mama Tohru: Ugh, my son, a servant in a junk shop! Uncle: Junk shop? Jade: This is an antique store! Mama Tohru: What? Only antique I see is the billy goat there! Jade: Billy goat? Tohru: Mommy! Mama Tohru: Hush up! Uncle: Dragon lady shuld watch her forked tongue, unless she wants a piece of Uncle! Mama Tohru: Hah! I would sleep floor with you... and this floor needs it! Uncle: Evil eye cannot work on me! Mama Tohru: Huh! What junk seller know about work? [Jackie is talking to Captain Black on the phone] Jackie: You want me to guard a fish? Captain Black: Actually, octopuses aren't fish. They're multipods. Jackie: Octopi. [to Uncle] Please behave! Captain Black: I'm sorry, grammar was never my best subject in school. Jackie: Oh, you mean the Kyoto Octopus! It is the most famous relic of the Kimodo Dynasty. Captain Black: Intelligence sources indicate that the Yokinowo crime family has the Octopus in its sights. Mama Tohru: Huh, why don't you get some light in here? Uncle: Thought bats could see in the dark! Jackie: [to Uncle and Mama Tohru] This must stop! Captain Black: My thinking exactly. I'll set it up. Thanks for your help, Jackie.

Tohru: Does it have fish? Waiter: This is a sushi restaurant. Everything has fish. Tohru (sadly): I hate fish... Boss Yokinowa: So, uh, Tohru, I gotta proposition for ya! Tohru: No thank you. Boss Yokinowa: Just hear me out. This isn't just some two-bit heist. What I've got in mind has eight legs and is loaded with jewels. [gestures] Tohru: You will kidnap Kare Noke and her Yodeling Kabukis? Boss Yokinowa: Kare Noke and her... ah ha ha, I love this guy! No, my friend, I'm talking about the Kyoto Octopus! Tohru: I don't think so... Boss Yokinowa: Hey, for old times sake! Serious payday. Could buy yourself a car just like this one. Make your mom proud.... Boss Yokinowa: You made a wise choice, Tohru. Tohru: sWhat do I do? Boss Yokinowa: Nothing fancy. You cruise into the expo, create a diversion... meanwhile, my boys make an end-run, grab the octopus. One tiny problem, Tohru; word is, you double-crossed your old boss, Valmont; that you're a rat. Tohru: I am no rat. Henchman 1: Yeah? Prove it! Tohru: I have information. Boss Yokinowa: Yeah? Henchman 2: I heard of him! They say he's unbeatable. Tohru: Nobody is unbeatable. Boss Yokinowa: I trust you'll take care of this Jackie Chan personally, Tohru. And I mean permanently. Jackie: Thank you for the tip off, Tohru. Tohru: Of course. Jackie: Your Mom will be very proud. Henchman (dazed): Tohru has a Mom...? Boss Yokinowa: Nobody doublecrosses the Yokinawa mob, Tohru. You just made the biggest, dumbest, and last mistake of your life. Jackie: But... you have a deal, right? Once you get the Octopus, you set us free. Boss Yokinowa: Once we get the Octopus, you and your chum are gonna be chum. Henchman 1: Huh? Henchman 2: Fish bait. Tohru: Oh, I do not like fish... Boss Yokinowa: Quit the squabbling, and put the fish on the table! Henchman 1: Uh, boss? Technically, an octopus is a member of the multipod family and-- [Boss Yokinowa glares at him] --put the fish on the table! Uncle: Hand is quicker than the eye! [kicks Henchman in the face] ... but should have been watching the foot! Tohru: I am sorry for the unpleasantness Mommy. Mama Tohru: My brave little boy! You make your mother proud. I am glad that you are not hurt... and also glad that you are with people who care about you. Jackie, Jade... the billy goat! Uncle: I will show you a billy goat!

Yokinowa Crime family - snake tattoos, green scale pattern; gold bling, shades, jackets and suits Boss Yokinowa - plays with yoyo 4 Henchmen - squeaky voices; Henchman #1 big, dumb, wears green jacket; Henchman #2 shorter, smarter, with long hair, goatee, shades, black suit "Deja Vu" Uncle: Quickly, Jackie! We must find Deja Vu Stone before Daolon Wong! Can you believe Dark wizard was released from jail for good behavior? Jackie: Uh, I do not think the justice system is prepared to comprehend crimes of magic, Uncle! Uncle: Whosoever possesses stone can transport himself into his own past and back, simply be willing it. Daolon Wong could revisit all his past defeats. [montage of Daolon Wong's defeats] Jackie: Why would anyone want to be defeated over and over again? Uncle: You are slow on uptake! Daolon Wong is now powerless! He will change past outcomes to regain his magic. [they hear footsteps] Uncle: The Dark chi master himself! [Jade appears] Jade: Tch! The sly niece-meister herself! [watching Jackie lose to past Tohru] Jade: Didn't Jackie get out of this scrape in one piece the first time around? Uncle: When one revisits past, one risks changing its outcome! Jade: Uncle, do you think Jackie's right? Did I really mess things up? Uncle: Nonsense, Jade! Jackie needs to watch where he's going! Jade: Not the broken leg, the Deja Vu thing! I stood there like a dummy while Wong snaked it from me. It's all my fault Jackie's stuck in rerun-ville! Jade: Whoa, look at Jackie go! [sadly] Hmm, guess he does do okay without my help. [after Jade fails to catch the antidote during "The Rock" episode] Jade: Tch, you think I would have gotten right the second time around! Uncle: Your past self does not know then what you know now, Jade. Jackie: Of all the villains, I had to bump into Shendu? Jade: So I'm quite the rascal, but it's not like I'm evil or anything! [Uncle shows her a vision from "Queen of the Shadowkhan"] Jade: I couldn't help it! I was possessed! Uncle: Did Uncle ask you to tattoo demon face onto your leg? No? You do not see Uncle walking around being evil, do you? Jade: Uh... Unc? [Flashback to "Chi of the Vampire" with the vampire-bitten Uncle] [after watching Past Uncle beat Past Tohru in "The Dog & Piggy Show"] Uncle: That will teach foolish Tohru to mess with Uncle when he is powered by immortality talisman! [pause] Uh, do not tell faithful apprentice that Uncle said that! [after being teleported by the Deja Vu Stone] Daolon Wong: Hmph! So here we are, back in the old fool's trash heap! Uncle: That is old fool's rare trash heap to you! Past Finn: You're Jackie Chan, the archaelogist?

Jackie: I bet you are looking for the shield I brought back from Bavaria. Past Finn: We're looking for--how'd you know? Jackie: He has it! [points to Daolon Wong] Daolon Wong: Chan is lying! Do you not recognize your master? [The Enforcers grab him and take him away] Finn: The only master we have is Big V! Chow: And he's gonna want to here all about where you stashed the shield! "The Curse of El Chupacabra" Jackie: Incredible. Jade: Incredibly boring! What kind of lame pyramid is this? No mummy curses, no booby traps, no bonus points? Jackie: Oh, this is not a video game, Jade. This is important research! [spots an angry panther] Jackie: I have had enough work for one day, it is quitting time, bye-bye! Go! Go! [the phone rings while the panther is chasing them] El Toro: It is I, El Toro. I have unfortunate news. An ancient evil plagues my people. It is the goat eater, the Chupacabra Jackie: Chupacabra? But that is just a fairy tale. El Toro: No. It is a real evil from which grown men hide like frightened children, and no goat is safe. Jade: Uhh, Jackie? Jackie: El Toro, I am a little busy right now! May I call you back? El Toro: Of course! But the sun will soon set and I... need your help, my friend. I know of ancient tablets that tell the legend of the Chupacabra. They may reveal a method to rid us of the beast. I need you to translate. Jackie: Hello, Mr. Chupacabra! You look like you are having a very bad night. Do you have a splinter in your paw? Perhaps we can help! [Chupacabra screams] Paco: Stay beside me, Jade! I will keep you safe! Paco: It is after the goat. Let's just give it to-Jade: Don't even finish that sentence! Jackie: You don't want to eat me! I am not a goat! El Toro: Fear not. The beast is no match for El Toro the Bull! Jackie: And El Jackie the... uh... Chan! Paco: You destroyed the Chupacabra! El Toro: It was not me, Paco. It appears sunlight was the victor. Jade: That's one point for sunlight! [at the celebration] El Toro: The goats are afraid, as if the Chupacabra is near. Jackie: Oh, that is crazy talk! El Toro: Perhaps not, my friend. Do not the children know; the beast wounded me, but it is a small injury to which I would normally give no notice. I fear I have been tainted by the creature's evil, infected by its ancient malevolence.

Jackie (translating): 'The beast hunts by night, hides by day; it feeds on livestock and goats; sunlight will destroy the beast'. [El Toro begins to transform] El Toro: Ah, my friend, I fear you must translate more quickly! Jackie: I feel like I am missing something obvious... [El Toro becomes the Chupacabra] oh, wait, here it is! 'Beware of the Chupacabra's claw; the evil can be transferred from beast to man, and the man will become the beast'! Oh, bad news-- ah! [El Toro attacks] Paco: Where's El Toro? Jackie: Uh... Paco, that was El Toro. It is the curse of the Chupacabra. El Toro is no longer the bull; he is... El Toro-cabra. [Uncle arrives] Uncle: The flight was delayed, the food was terrible, the movie had no plot, and I have turbulence! Jackie: Can you cure El Toro? Uncle: Do not rush the chi! Jackie: You are not an animal! You are... the Bull! [El Toro/Chupacabra screams] Jackie: Okay, 'Bull' is an animal, but it is only a nickname! [Jackie sweeps El Toro-cabra off its feet] Jade: Okay, that's one point for Jackie, but I don't like this game any more! Paco: It will be game over in a minute, and I cannot let that happen! "Origami" [appraises the theft] Jackie: Northern Song dynasty, 11th century, ink and pale color on sink... it's beautiful. An authentic Chinese masterpiece! Amber: C'est formidable! One moment while I fetch the authentication papers. [leaves the room] [after the robbery] Inspector (skeptically): You claim a fold-up man stole the painting, slipped between the bars, transformed into a bird, and flew away? Jackie: I'll show you! [grabs the Inspector's note and begins folding them] He bent like this, folded like that, twisted over, then again, then he looked just like this! [the notes are balled up] Uh, but more bird-shaped. Inspector: Monsieur Chan, I will thank you not to destroy my notes, si'l vous plait! Uncle (to bus driver): You drive too fast! How can Uncle see the sights? Slow down! Jade: What's with the look? Did that painting turn out to be bogus? Jackie: No, it was a true masterpiece. But a fold-up man stole it, turned into a bird, and flew away! Jade: Ha ha, 'fold up man'. Jackie: That is what the police said too. Oh, poor Amber. She will be in trouble with her bosses. I must retrieve the painting. Somehow. Jade: Lucky you got me. I read in a comic book once: 'to catch a thief, you must think like a thief'. Jackie: But I am no good at thinking like a thief. Jade: Yeah, I know. That's why I recommend we find some expert help! [later, at the airport] Jade: Viper! Viper: Jade! [looks up] What's with him?

Jade: Nothing. He's just having a hissy about you being a bad influence on me because you're a thief. Viper: Former thief. Now I'm a security consultant for the Bechtel Corporation. And Jade tells me you need some assistance? Jackie: No thank you. I have enough problems with one criminal. Jade: Aw, come on, Jackie. Viper's a good guy now! Here, Viper, the painting stealer left this behind! [Jade hands Viper a paper crane] Jackie: Where did you find that? Viper: Ah, yes, they call him 'Origami'. Jackie: Huh!? Jade: You know tihs guy? Viper: I've heard only a rumor of a mastermind who leaves origami animals at all his thefts, like a calling card. Jackie: And can he fold himself into different shapes. Viper: There is one person who might know more, but... Jackie: 'But'? But what? Viper: But...you don't want my help... [later, at the Fox] Viper: The Fox -- this is home base for every crook in Paris. The proprietor is... an old friend. Jade: Cool, a wretched hive of scum and villainy! Jackie: Jade, if I let you come inside, you must do everything I say. First, touch nothing. Second, see nothing. Third, talk to no one, and -- [Jade runs into the Fox after Viper] Hey! Fox: Viper! I heard you went... legit. Viper: You heard right. Listen, Fox, I need some 411. What can you tell me about this? [shows the paper crane] Fox: Oui, Origami. He only steals the finest in Far East art. They say he has... magical powers. Jade: Cool! Fox: The way I heard it told: he was just a small-timer. Vending machines, picking pockets, little penny-ante heists. Until, one day, he found an enchanted square of paper, with the power to transform. The paper, well, let's just say it... remade him! Now he has some kind of folding power... if you believe that sort of thing. Which I don't. Jackie: But it is true! I saw Origami with my own eyes! Fox: Ah! Did you see his henchmen, the Easter Bunny and the Tooth Fairy as well? [laughs] [outside] Jackie: Well, that was useless. I already knew the thief could fold up. Jade: Yeah, but now we know he only steals 'the finest Far East art'. Viper: Hey, the kid's a good listener! Jackie: How come you never listen to things I say? For example, 'stay with Uncle'? Jade: Aw man! Viper: The house of Kunihiko Kasahara, of Kasahara Exports. He possesses more Far East art than the Far East itself. It's just a matter of time before Origami shows up to rob the place. Jackie: We have to warn Mr. Kasahara! Viper: Have you never heard of a stakeout? That means we hide and keep watch, with the emphasis on hide. [Jackie gets out and walks towards the Kasahara house] Kasahara: May I help you? Jackie: Mr. Kasahara, sir, your art collection is in danger. There is a thief who... uh... is very resourceful. I would like to offer my assistance. Kasahara: Please leave my doorstep, Mister... Jackie: Chan. Jackie Chan. Kasahara: Go away, Chan Jackie Chan. I will not pay for your protection. [slams the door]

[on the tour bus] Uncle: You are driving too slow! I want to see all of Paris before I get old! [on the roof] Jackie: Jade should not be running around on rooftops with thieves! Viper: I'm not a thief! Better she learns to catch bad guys from a pro! Jackie: Jade does not need to know how to catch bad guys! Viper: But you do! [Kasahara is admiring the stolen painting] Kasahara: Ah, another masterpiece for my eyes only. Jade (whispering): It's him! Kasahara is Origami! Jackie: That painting does not belong to you! [Kasahara secretly activates the alarm] Kasahara: Ah, Mr. Chan Jackie Chan! Jackie: Return to the painting to the university! Kasahara: Why? So it can end up in a mueum? [Jackie attacks, Kasahara dodges] Jackie: No more games. I know who you are -- Origami! Kasahara: I'm sure we both agree that there's nothing to be gained... [Kasahara changes into Origami] ...by my denying it! Jade: Jackie! Viper: Jade, wait! Jumping into a fight before you're needed usually makes things worse. [Origami slices through a stone pillar, nearly crushing Jackie] Viper: Okay, now he needs help. But you stay here. Jade: Aw man... [The Inspector bursts into the room] Inspector: Police! Stay where you are! Jackie: Detective, I found the fold-up man! He's over here! [gestures with the swords at Kasahara] Inspector: What is this madness? Mr. Kasahara, sir, are you all right? Kasahara: This man is crazy! He is dangerous! He destroyed my gallery, attacked me with my own 12th-century swords. Jackie: No! He's lying! He changed back into a normal man! Jade: It's true! Viper: Kunihiko Kasahara is Origami, the master thief! Inspector: Hmm... are you not a thief yourself, eh? La Viper, I believe? [he holds up a pair handcuffs] Viper: Uh... run! Inspector: After them! Jade: Well, now we know how Kasahara built such a large collection of Far East art. Jackie: But now the police think I'm crazy and dangerous! Viper: You know what we have to do. We have to catch Kasahara in the act. Viper: Breaking into the Louvre. I've been planning this in my head for years... Jackie: Remember, we are here to catch Origami, not steal anything. Viper: Don't you trust me? Jackie: No, I do not! [on the tour bus] Uncle: It is too dark to see anything! Is not Paris the City of Lights? Make it brighter!

[after Viper slides through the closing doors of the Louvre] Jackie: Viper! I knew she would betray us. [Viper opens the door for them] Viper: I heard that. Jade: See, Jackie? I told you Viper's a good guy now! Jackie: Hmm. [the police arrive at the Louvre] Inspector: Halt! are all under arrest! Viper: You don't want us! Jade: You want the fold-up man! Inspector: Oui, oui, the paper-fold up man! I have heard all about it for the last time! Jackie: No, no, he's right there! [they see the fold-up man struggling with the urn before crashing to the ground] Inspector: The fold-up man! Jackie: The man is too heavy for him to fly away! Inspector (to his men): S'arrete! [they run after Jackie and Origami] Jade: Is this one of those times when it's better to wait before jumping in? Viper: No. [they follow] [in the truck] Jackie (to Origami): Fine, you take the wheel! I'll just take this! [grabs the stolen urn] [after causing the bus to stop suddenly and scatter cheese on Uncle] Jackie: Sorry Uncle, I'll see you later, don't miss the Louvre, bye-bye! Jackie: Stealing a police car? Shame on you! Viper: Didn't you just steal that urn from Mr. Kasahara? Jackie: That is different! Jackie: Viper, look after Jade, call the police! [leaves] Viper: Wait, did he just ask me to look after you? Jade: Duh, Jackie likes you! Viper (surprised): How about that! Jackie: Origami, look at me! I have a rare porcelain urn from the kilns of Jingdezhen! [Origami turns into a paper pterodactyl and takes after him] [Kasahara corners Jackie Chan on the roof] Kasahara: Well, Chan Jackie Chan, it appears that you are down to two options: hand over the urn, or jump! Jackie: The police already know the truth. They saw you try to fly away. Kasahara: They will think it was only their eyes playing tricks on them. No one believes that there can be a 'paper fold-up man'! Jackie: All right, you win! [Jackie throws the urn; when Kasahara goes after it, Jackie jumps on him, folds him up, and places him in the urn] Amber: Merci, Jackie. Was the thief a fold-up man like you said? Jackie: Uh, no. My eyes played tricks on me. It was just a normal thief. [Amber walks away] Viper (mockingly): 'Just a normal thief', huh? Then I guess you really didn't need my help... [Jade winks] Jackie: That is right. No help.

Viper: I understand. [kisses him and then walks away] [Uncle arrives and grabs Jackie's ear] Uncle: Ai-yah! Do you know how long I was stuck on that bus with cheese on my face? Jackie: I said I was sorry! "Return of the Pussycat" [Jade jumps out at Jackie in her costume] Jackie: Ah! Is it Halloween already? Jade: You forgot, didn't you? Tonight's the school play; I'm Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde -- it's my big debut! Jackie: Oh, I am sorry, Jade! But the University asked Uncle and me to explore a subterranean city under the streets! Jade (skeptically): Uh-huh! Jackie: No, it's true! A recent tremor has opened a passageway to parts of San Francisco which have been buried since the 1906 earthquake! Another tremor may collapse the passage at any moment, so there's not much time! Jade: But... my play! Jackie: Oh, I'm sorry. I would love to see your play, but I have to do this now, and I cannot be in two places at once. Jade: Hmm... that's okay, I understand. Your work is pretty important. [Jade leaves and returns with the Tiger talisman] Jackie: Huh? Why do I need the Tiger talisman-[The talisman activates; Jackie splits in two] Jade: Two Jackies can be in two places at once! Jackie Dark: Aah, all right, the Tiger is free, free to be me! You know how lame it is being trapped in the same body as him? Jackie Light: Oh no! This is a big mistake! We should not be two Jackies! Jackie Dark: See what I mean? Out of my way, Pussycat! Jackie Light: I am very disappointed in you, Jade! You know playing with magic is a no-no! Jackie Dark (sardonically): Heh, 'no-no'? Oh no, say it ain't so? Jackie Light: We should turn ourselves back into one Jackie, right away! Jade: So, Uncle, did you pick up my cape from the Clean-o-max? Uncle: Cape? What cape? Jade: Tch, the school play! If I don't have a cape, my big debut will be ruined! I'll be ruined! Everything will be ruined! Uncle: Okay, okay, you are making my brain hurt! Tell Jackie to be ready for our journey when I return! Jade: Deal! [Uncle leaves; Jackie Dark comes out of hiding] Jackie Dark: Nice save, Jade-ster. Jade: 'Our' journey? Uncle's going underground too? Isn't anyone coming to see me be Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. Jackie Light: I would love to! Oh, the theatre! The theatre! Jade: Uh-uh. No way am I showing up at school with him! Jackie Dark: I know exactly how you feel. "The Chi of the Vampire" Uncle: Not so fast! I must first appraise the items. I do not want my shop to be full of junk! Jade: Then how did it get so full of junk? Mr. Lam: Be assured that all of the heirlooms are of the finest quality. Uncle: Then you will not mind if I take time to examine them. Mr. Lam: They have already been--

Uncle: --not by me they haven't! Mr. Lam: You have my word that-Uncle: --even so, I would-Mr. Lam: --just take them and-Uncle: --I will do no such-Mr. Lam: --wait-Uncle: --no-Mr. Lam: --but-Uncle: --nooo! I will appraise everything or purchase nothing! [while driving away] Assistant: Perhaps we should warn them! Mr. Lam: Do not be foolish! If they knew what was hidden among those relics, they would never take it off our hands! [while hiding underneath a coffee table] Jade: This isn't a coffee table... it's a coffin table! Cool! But why would a coffin have a lock? Uncle: Ai-yah! Jackie, guard the door in case it returns! Jackie: 'It'? Uncle: Hidden inside of an antique... Mr. Lam tried to trick us into taking it! Jackie: What is 'it'? Uncle: A Kiang Shi... a vampire! Jade: Told ya! Jackie (skeptically): Did the little monster put you up to this? Uncle: Chinese vampire drain chi -- life energy -- from the prey, making the vampire stronger and turning their victims into servants! Without any chi, Tohru will soon transform into fiendish minion of darkness! We must perform a chi transformation! [after slamming the vampire into a wall] Tohru: I just slam-dunked a chi-sucker! I rule! Go Tohru, go Tohru, I'm the bomb! Uncle: Hmm, it appears the chi transfusion was successful! [after Uncle gets his chi sucked out] Tohru: How are we gonna save Uncle without Uncle? Jade: We must do research! Jackie: ...you gotta be kidding me. Tohru: He's starting to go all 'fang-y'. Jackie: Uncle is turning into the vampire's minion. Use my chi for the transfusion. Jade: I do not know such spells! Jade has Uncle's chi, not his brains! Possessed Uncle: I will vanquish you, and feed your chi to my master! Jade: Ai-yah! He is a servant to the vampire! Tohru: Duh! Jade: As long as the parchment spell is in place, Uncle cannot place. [Jackie creeps up to Uncle] Possessed Uncle: You are doomed! Jackie: Ah! Jade: One more thing -- he can still talk. Possessed Uncle: You may have defeated the servant, but you shall never defeat the master! The glorious one will devour every last bit of your delicious chi. Tohru: Shoulda put that paper over his mouth. Jade: We must all reclaim our chi before sunrise, or it will belong to the vampire forever.

Tohru: You mean, I'd be stuck in 'Jade'-mode? Jade: You would rather have Uncle's chi? I cannot stop thinking about digestion! Jade: We must collect a toadstool from a graveyard, place it inside the vampire's left sock, and throw the sock into a river. Jackie: You're making this up. Jade: You want to stop the Kiang Shi, yes? Then do what Jade tells you! Tohru: Come on, Jackie! It's Vampire Butt-Kick Time! Jackie: ...this is too weird. Kiang Shi: I see you! Jackie: You can talk? Kiang Shi: With so much chi to nourish me, I have grown stronger. I can withstand anything, even the light of day! [after getting knocked over] Possessed Uncle: Master! I have fallen... and cannot get up! Jade: Jade may have Uncle's chi, but Jade is still Jade! Jackie: So, everybody's chi is back where it belongs? Tohru: Thank you for the loan, Jade. It was... cool. Jade: No problem, big T, but I don't think Uncle got all his chi back! I have this monster craving for mung beans! "Attack of the J-Clones" Jade: Well, if not Captain Hook, then who? Jackie: The museum surveillance tape is about to show us. [They see Viper] Viper: So, uh... who's the babe? Viper (from inside a prison cell): Really, I appreciate you guys giving me the benefit of the doubt! El Toro: A fine example of prehistoric lucha libre. Captain Black (about the talking El Toro mask): The lab says its constituent parts aren't based on any science we know. Jade: Then maybe it's time we bring in the man from U.N.C.L.E. El Toro Mask: I will pin all of you to the mat! Jade: With what arms, El Fake-O? Chang Clone: As much I would enjoy having revenge on the J-Team for retrieving the precious jade I worked so hard to steal, you know my every move is monitored. I'm sure your people are even aware of the flavor of my chewing gum. [Jackie splutters] Captain Black: Spearmint, Jackie. Uncle: That is not really Chang. It is his magical duplicate! Captain Black: You mean, we're dealing with clones? Uncle: Ai-yah! Who said anything about clowns? We are facing forces more powerful than the circus! Jackie Clone: I'm sorry I'll be back to destroy you later thank you!

Jade: Doesn't anyone think that I might be a clone? Everyone: No! Jade: I'm not feeling the love here! Jade Clone: Okay, team, let's rock! Viper Clone: What's the kid doing here? Jackie Clone: She never listens! Uncle: Like the originals, magical duplicates were naturally good. An additional spell was required to make them evil. On an interesting side note... [Tohru and his clone fight] Uncle: ... which is why your mother has terrible manners. Tohru: Uncle, please, the spell! Uncle: I am getting to that! Jade, Jade Clone (at once): Let's rock team! Jackie, Jackie Clone (at once): Jade! Leave this to the grownups! "Mask of the Shadowkhan" Jade: Dullsville! Jackie: No, the capital of Georgia is Atlanta! Jade, your geography test is tomorrow. Let's try, Oregon! Jade: Why does Tohru get to study the fun stuff? Uncle: Uncle is waiting! Tohru: Ooh, I know this one. That is the symbol for a conjuring spell, one which requires garlic and... ginger? Uncle: Correct... if you are making chicken chow mein! Do you plan on becoming chi wizard, Tohru? Then you must prepare for day when new evil enters our world. [in prison] Hak Foo: This had better work, wizard! Daolon Wong: While I no longer possess my full powers, I, Daolon Wong, have amassed the spell ingredients required to make our escape. [chanting] Come to me! Yes! Liberate us, Shadowkhan! Rise, my army of darkness. Tarakudo: Your army? I am the one and only King of the Shadowkhan! Daolon Wong: Tarakudo? Awakened? Tarakudo: And redy to reclaim my ninja magic. A task for which I will require... assistance! Tarakudo: Serve me well, and your reward will be great. Finn: Yeah, about that. We appreciate you busting us out and all, Tarakudo-san, but the truth is we're kind of burned out on the whole henchmen-for-hire thing... Tarakudo: Ah, you require motivation then? [sends a giant flying barrel at them] Ratso: We're on board! Chow: When do we start? Finn: Ready to work! Tarakudo: That's the spirit! [seeing Tarakudo] Tohru: Oni! [Uncle gasps] Jackie: New evil, right? Uncle: The symbol of the Shadowkhan! Tarakudo: What fun's a cymbal without drums?

[sends a bunch of flying drums at them] Jade: Hi Jackie! [Jackie screams] Jade: Before you get mad, listen, the capital of Kansas is Kansas City. Jackie: The capital is Topeka and that is not the point! [seeing Jade] Tarakudo: You! Aah, the former Queen of the Shadowkhan, returning to the forces of darkness? Jackie: Thank you, no, not today! Jade: Er, what Jackie said! Tarakudo: In time. You're young. [Captain Black is using binoculars to watch a falling object] Captain Black: It's Jackie, and he doesn't appear to have a parachute. [waking up suddenly on plane] Tohru: Mommy! Jackie: Tohru? Tohru: Heh, bad dream? [Jade pops out of overhead compartment] Jade: Let me guess? Mr. Creepy Head? Jackie: Jade, you are supposed to be with Captain Black! Jade: Thought I should be here in case you fall from another plane! Tohru: The head, it reminded me of the oni. Jade: The who-ni? Tohru: When I was a child growing up in Japan, my mother told me tales of the oni, hideous horned demons who would sneak into the rooms of disobedient children. Jackie (looking at Jade): And what did they want with these 'disobedient children'? [Jade blows raspberry] Tohru: The oni would eat their souls! [shudders] Jade: So these oni are like Japanese boogeymen. Uncle: Feh! Fairy tales! Floating head cannot be oni! Tohru: It can't? Uncle: Of course not! Everyone who has controlled the Shadowkhan has been Chinese. Shendu, Chinese! Daolon Wong, Chinese! But oni are Japanese! Jackie: Radar indicates that the Dark Hand jet has landed in Hong Kong. Uncle: See? Hong Kong, Chinese! [in Hong Kong] Jackie: Shendu's palace? Uncle: Shendu collected many artifacts possessing great magic. Floating head may be seeking one of these. Tohru: Uh, I will stand guard outside. Jade: Don't be afraid, T. It's just a silly old head. Tohru: Just a silly, old soul-stealing Shadowkhan-controlling head!... [inside Shendu's palace] Tarakudo: Aah, consider it... a gift. Ratso: Ooh, just like Christmas. Chow: Bet there's a ton o' treasure in it! Finn: Dude, you brought us all this way for a mask? Tarakudo: It was from this mask that Shendu drew the power to control his Shadowkhan army, and through which Daolon Wong's magic drew that very same power. [to Hak Foo] Why don't you see how it fits?

Tarakudo: Again? Who are these people? Ratso: Well, Jackie Chan is some kind of do-gooder, and the big guy over there used to be one of us but now he's on their side and the old guy pointing the blowfish is-- [gets blasted by Uncle] Uncle: Who else wants a piece of Uncle? Tarakudo: You have no idea who you are dealing with! Uncle: Enlighten me! Tarakudo: Bow before Tarakudo, King of all Shadowkhan, Lord of all Oni! Uncle: So you are Japanese! [Tarakudo blasts Uncle] Tarakudo: Consider yourself 'enlightened'. Chow: Four against one? Now that hardly seems fair... Jade: Uh, Jackie? I'm getting the feeling this mask thing gives Chow the power to summon... [Shadowkhan appear around them] ...Shadowkhan. Chow: It's over, Chan. Uncle (chanting): Tokeru, yimen jaaku. Jackie: Yes... it is. Tarakudo: You have failed me! [Chow bows] Tarakudo: Do not fret; it is but a minor defeat. Finn: That's cool. Ratso: Tarakudo's an okay guy! Tarakudo: Besides, our mission has only yet begun. Tohru: It goes on to say that Tarakudo once terrorized the land with his trusted oni generals. Each demon general controlled its own army, which were comprised of a different tribe of Shadowkhan. Jade: Uh, different how? Jackie: I would prefer not to have to find out! Tohru: Tarakudo's reign came to an end when the spirits of his generals were trapped within masks. Nine generals, nine masks. Jade: Nine... different tribes of Shadowkhan? Uncle: What are we waiting for? There are eight more masks which we must find before forces of darkness do. Jackie: Let me guess; the masks were scattered across the Earth? Tohru: Yep. Uh, one more thing... should the nine masks ever be rejoined, their combined power may summon enough Shadowkhan to engulf the Earth in eternal darkness. Uncle: Ai-yah! Tohru, must do research! Tohru: He must? Uncle: You were told childhood tales of oni by mother. You read Japanese. You are Japanese. So you must do research!

"Samurai Ratso" Uncle: Can you not read faster, Tohru! Cobwebs are forming on Uncle? Tohru: My Japanese is rusty, Sensei! Uncle: At this rate, new forces of darkness will locate eight other masks before we leave room! [standing in front of a wall of masks] Jade: Jackie! Why research when you can come on down to the Oni Mask Superstore? Uncle: Until a cursed one is worn, these are merely masks!

Tohru: Then why do I have a strange, clammy feeling down my spine? Uncle: You have the willies? [Tarakudo appears] Tarakudo: Usually a pretty good sign that the King of All Onis is in the house! Tarakudo: Hello? Henchmen? Lend a hand won't you and fetch the mask! Ratso: Uh... which one? Hak Foo: The magic one! [after wearing the mask] Ratso: Oh man I feel like... Tarakudo: ...summoning Shadowkhan? Ratso: Yeah! So, do I just yell for them or what? Tarakudo: You must feel the power, Ratso. Call upon the darkness within. Tohru: I hate fish. Tarakudo: A job well done, boys. For our next trick... ooh! Chow: Whoa, are you alright? Finn: What is it, big kahuna? Tarakudo: I think I... have the willies. Tohru: Sensei, the scroll speaks of the legendary Hana Fuda, an ancient deck of cards. My mommy told me of these cards when I was young. Uncle: Pah, more fairy tales! Cards not important. Tohru: But legends indicates that the cards are magic, and may point the way to the remaining oni masks! Uncle: I am telling you, cards not important! [Tohru shudders] Jackie: Tohru? Jade: Let me guess: your old pal... 'Willie'? [Tarakudo appears] Tarakudo: So, hoping to find the Hana Fuda cards? Well, I can't let you do that! Uncle: ...okay. Maybe cards important! [holding up an onion] Tohru: Back! Uncle: Onion? Do not be foolish, Tohru! Use garlic! Tarakudo: Whoa, easy with that veggie, big fella! [Tohru throws the onion at him] Tarakudo: Ah! My eyes! My eyes! Tohru: It does work! Jackie: Ah, I think it is check out time! Tohru: Mommy always told me that onions keep the oni away. I used to sleep with one under my pillow. Jade: You da man, T! You da man! Uncle (sadly): Yes... he is. Jackie: Uncle, that is not our train. Uncle: It is mine. Uncle must go to airport now. Jackie: What? Jade: Why? Uncle: Being away from shop for so long makes me nervous? Jackie: Uncle...? Uncle: I am only getting in your way. Tohru has knowledge of Japanese legends, which Uncle does not. Tohru gets willies from oni, which Uncle does not. Tohru knows tricks with vegetables,

which-Tohru: Please, Sensei, I require your guidance. Uncle: I offer you my confidence. [Uncle boards train] President: ...thus the cards were handed down my ancestors. As you can see, I based my company logo on the Hana Fuda kanji. So why are you so interested in my family's deck of cards? Jackie: Are you familiar with oni? President: Of course! My grandmother would read me stories when I was a child. Why? Tohru: Some very bad oni know of your cards! President: Oni are not real! They are stuff of children's tales! [gasps] Jackie: What is it? President: The girl! Her shadow! [a Shadowkhan steps out of Jade's shadow] Ratso: Hiya! President: Ah! Take the cards! They are yours! [Jade and Tohru are trying to figure out the cards] Tohru: Uh... gin rummy? Jade: How about 'crazy eights'? [cards activate] Jade: Look! It's showing us the mask! Tohru: But we already know that part! [second card activates] Jade: This one's telling us where to find--er, where we found it! [third card activates] And, for a life-time supply of grape soda, the mask removal spell ingredient is... Tohru: Japanese silk! Jade: You mean, like in a kimono? Tohru: Where can we find a kimono at this time of night? [Ratso appears] Ratso: Game over! [after blasting away all of Ratso's Shadowkhan with Tohru's spell] Uncle: Hmm, very good stun spell! Jade: Uncle, you're back! Uncle: Only because I realized I do not have keys to shop! Tohru: Oops! Uncle: Keys not important now! Did you discover ingredient for mask removal spell? Tohru: Japanese silk! [reaches for Uncle's jacket] Uncle: Blended wool and polyester! Uncle does not wear clothes of movie star or male model! Tohru: Or... President of car company? [Ratso gets dragged back to Tarakudo's roof] Tarakudo: It would appear Chan possesses the cards, since you no longer possess horns! Tohru: Sensei, what will keep Tarakudo from penetrating the vault? Jade: Oni magic cannot defeat onion magic! Uncle: A little trick I learned from my apprentice! "Black Magic" Jackie: Why did I let you talk me into this? Jade: You said yourself, Jackie: you're too fat! Jackie: I said I am too heavy to climb the totem pole without risk of damaging it, Jade.

Jade: Heavy, fat, same diff! [Enforcers are playing rock paper and scissors; Ratso gets paper and the other two get Rock] Finn: Sorry, dude. Chow: Rocks crush paper! [later] Ratso: Wait a minute; paper covers rock! Jade: Look out! [mask lands on Captain Black's face] Jackie: Captain Black! Jade: I said look out, not look up! Finn: Tarakudo's going to be one unhappy camper! Ratso: Well, it ain't my fault! I was paper! [Tarakudo appears] Tarakudo: What is not your fault? Finn: We never had a chance, Big Head Honcho, sir. Chow: That oni mask, it's defective! Ratso: Yeah, Captain Black's wearing it. Tarakudo: The Captain Black? Enforcers: Yes! Tarakudo: Then we now have a man on the inside. Jackie: He does not seem evil. Uncle: Because, Captain Black's inherent goodness is keeping the dark forces within him at bay. For the moment. But we must remove the mask before it corrupts his chi, and to accomplish that we must acquire more spell ingredient. Tohru: Apologies, Sensei. Uncle: One more thing; while Tohru and I are away, it is essential that Captain Black not learn the full extent of the mask's magic. He must not summon his Shadowkhan! Jade: So, what are we supposed to do? Distract Captain Hornhead with videos and board games? [alarm blasts] Agent: Code Blue: three dozen tourists have been abducted on Alcatraz. Captain Black: Take five, boys! I'll handle this one solo! Jackie: Er, maybe that's not such a good idea. Captain Black: What's wrong, Jackie? Don't think old Black Magic's up to it? Tarakudo: Help us.... help us.... help... oh! (normal voice) CAptain Black! We've never been formally introduced: I am Tarakudo, King of all Shadowkhan. You may bow. Captain Black: The only king I bow to is Elvis, and I don't see you wearing blue suede shoes. Captain Black: Jackie, why didn't you tell me I could summon these shadow guys? They're gnarly! Jackie: Heh, must have slipped my mind. Hak Foo: Black has beaten us! Again! Tarakudo: Calm down. By summoning his Shadowkhan, Black has sealed his promotion from Captain... to Demon General! [after the Shadowkhan force random people into jail] Man: I'm telling you, I'm innocent! Chow: Yeah, yeah, save the drama for your mama!

[about Captain Black's prisoners] Jackie: What did all these people do? Captain Black: It's what they didn't do, Jackie. Jackie: I'm... sorry? Captain Black: They're not one of us! Jade: How can you be sure? Captain Black: The mask tells me. It knows whose naughty and nice. It tells me who to punish! Jade: If we keep him inside Section 13 until Uncle gets back, what's the worst that could happen? [gasp] Both: The other oni masks! Jade: We've got to snag those face-huggers before Captain Black remembers they're in the vault! Jackie: Easier said that done. Section 13 is crawling wiht his Shadowkhan police. We must act like nothing is wrong. Captain Black (quietly): Bad move, Jackie. Captain Black": You're not planning on stealing my masks, now were you, Jade? Jade: You're getting kinda greedy, aren't you, Captain Black? You only have one face! Captain Black: But three partners in darkness, itching for a makeover! Jade: The Captain Black I know would never do that! Captain Black: The Captain Black you know is on permanent vacation. Jade: Well, he's about to catch the next flight back! [blasts him with the Tiger Talisman] Light Captain Black: Haven't been feeling quite myself... Jade: Your other self isn't quite yourself either! Light Captain Black: Whoa, nelly! Dark Captain Black: So you've gone and yanked my yin from my yang. Feels like a burden's been lifted! Dark Captain Black: Oh, Captain Black? I don't think that Section 13 is big enough for the both us! Light Captain Black: Then I'm afraid I'm going to have to ask you to leave! Jade: Warning; I may look small, but I'm a giant can of butt-whoop just waiting to be opened! Dark Captain Black (to Light Captain Black): I'm embarassed that we're even related. Uncle: I told you! Do not allow Captain Black to summon Shadowkhan. Dark Captain Black: Captain Black doesn't live here any more, old man! Light Captain Black: Guess again, sparky! [knocks the other one out] Jade: It's good to have you back, Captain Black. Captain Black: It's good to be good. Fisherman: Oni. This antique looks valuable! Today is my lucky day! [Ratso shoves him into the water] Ratso: Not! Chow: Demon magic, here I come! [Finn grabs the mask] Finn: Not! You clowns had your shot at being ninja masters, and you blew it! Ratso: We was doing okay until Chan showed up. Finn: Well it's Finn's turn, baby! Those Shadowkhan are gonna be my slaves, because nobody's taking this mask! Jackie: Not! [Jackie grabs the mask]

Tohru: I hate fish! [after Chan escapes the mask] Finn: Aw, man. Tarakudo's gonna have our heads! Tarakudo: That can be arranged. Tohru: I will rule, after a nice hot bath. Uncle: No time for rest, Tohru. Uncle has located Japanese encyclopedia of evil. You must research away to defeat Tarakudo, and end oni mask quest. Tohru: Yes, sensei. Uncle: One more thing, do not forget to sweep. Tohru: Yes, sensei. Uncle: One more thing, sink is clogged. Please plunge! Tohru: Yes, Sensei. Uncle: One more thing! P.U. Rotten fish! Take a bath! [Tohru growls] Uncle: One more thing-Tohru: No more things! Uncle: You disrespect Uncle? Uncle took you in, put roof over your head, put food in your belly -lots of food -- and this is how you repay me? Tohru: I cook, I clean, I travel the world to be smothered in fish, and you thank me by demanding many more things? Both: I will never speak to you again! Ikazuki: Ikazuki lives! Bow before my mighty form and-- [looks around] Where is my mighty form? Insolent humans, you shall pay for your trickery at the hands of my Shadowkhan! [pause] Ahem, at the hands of my Shadowkhan! [pause, nothing happens] Tohru: The masks may only summon Shadowkhan if they are whole, attached to a human host. Uncle: Jade, please tell Tohru not to state obvious. Jade: Uncle said 'duh'! Jade: Okay, Jackie; good cop, bad cop. Jackie: Uh, hello, Mr. Ikazuki-san. We were wondering if maybe you might tell us how to defeat Tarakudo? Ikazuki: I shall devour your brains! Jade: All right, you half-baked arts and crafts project. Start talking, or I'll redecorate your mug with macaroni and paint! Jackie: Please, we just want to know--Jade: I have a glue gun and I'm not afraid to use it! Ikazuki: Your threats do not interest me. But he does. Tohru: M-me. Ikazuki: With my magnificent face atop your mighty form, we would be unstoppable! Tohru: Uh, no, but I-I do not want-Uncle: Jade, please tell Tohru to stop quivering like frightened chihuahua! Tohru: Please tell the scowling billy goat that I am not frightened! [Both growl] Jade: Easy there, boys! Uncle: Please tell Tohru that Uncle will give him something to be frightened about! Tohru: Please tell Sensei that I would like to see him try! Jackie: If Ikazuki gets loose, he could wind up on someone's face. Jade: And be able to summon his Shadowkhan! [the mask appears on Finn's buttocks] Ikazuki: Ikazuki leaves! Bow before my mighty form! Finn: This is not happening! This is not happening!

[pause] Ratso: No way am I bowing to Finn's tookus. Tohru: Jade, please tell Sensei that we should conjure a locator spell. Uncle: Jackie, please tell Tohru that proper locator spell will take too long to make... not that I could hear him! Jackie: Please, I am tired of listening to you two not talk. The mask escaped because you two were fighting, and if you keep fighting, it will wind up on an innocent face before we can find it! Uncle: Ai-yah! Tell ex-apprentice that he did not give Uncle mask removal potion. Tohru: Tell Sensei that his ex-apprentice has it covered. [holds up the mask removal potion vial] Uncle: lizard says, mask is this way. Tohru: Blowfish says, mask is that way. Uncle: Please tell Tohru that Uncle's lizard has seniority over his blowfish. Jackie: ...I give up. Tarakudo: General Ikazuki, how good to see you. You're looking rather... heinous. [The Chans see Ikazuki on Finn's buttocks] Jackie: Huh? Finn: Hello, rude to stare! Uncle: Ai-yaaaah! Jade: The demon from planet Ur-Jackie: Jade! Jade: Er, Neptune! Uncle: Ow! Ow! Jackie: Uncle, please! Uncle: No, Uncle has it coming! Ow! Uncle had opportunity to warn Tohru, but did he? No! All because of silly argument! Now, my apprentice is in danger of becoming demon! Ow! One more thing, Tohru was right; Uncle says one more thing too often! Jackie: Do not worry, Uncle. Ikazuki cannot remove himself from Finn without the mask removal potion, and that is safe and sound... Jade: ...in Tohru's pocket. Jackie: Bad day... Ikazuki: They tell me you are a conjurer of good magic. They tell me you are the maker of mask removal potions. So... provide me with the potion I require! Tohru: Your breath smells like Finn's underwear! Finn: Dude, let me have a crack at him. Tohru, T-Man, buddy, maybe you haven't noticed but I kinda have a face on my sitting place, so I was wondering if you could be a pal and-Ikazuki: The potion, or I shall feast upon your brains! Ratso: Oooh, the old good cop bad cop. Uncle: And to guide us to him, a strand of Tohru's hair. He never did unclog sink. Jackie: Uncle, are we sure that dabbling with shadow magic is the best idea? Uncle: If we are to find where Shadowkhan are keeping Tohru, then like Shadowkhan we must travel through shadow... Ikazuki: Remove the wart from me, and place my glorious face upon the giant's mighty form! Finn: Woohoo, free at last, baby! Tohru: Nooo, anything but oni! [Ratso hesitates] Ikazuki: Well? What are you waiting for? Ratso: Uh, well, this is kinda awkward. Ikazuki: Simpleton! Do as you are told!

Ratso: Okay! But we are never gonna bring this up again! Chow (turning away): I'm not even here! [after being removed] Ikazuki: Fools! I shall claim a new mighty form and devour your-[Jade removes Rat talisman] Jade: Blah blah blah! Jackie: Thank you, Jade. Uncle: Yes. All that chatter was giving Uncle headache. Besides, there are others who I would rather hear speak. Tohru: Likewise, Sensei. "The Shadow Eaters" Hak Foo: And now, Chans, prepare to meet the fiercest tribe of Shadowkhan yet; mine! Demon summons ninja army! [Hak Foo summons a swarm of very tiny Shadowkhan] Hak Foo: They--they are--they're so... Jade: ...cute! Hak Foo (charging at Jackie): Demon compensates for inferior ninja army! Hak Foo (after seemingly throwing Jackie to the alligators): I will not see you later, alligator! Uncle: Jackie! You are trying to find card with mask removal ingredient? Jackie: No, Uncle! I am trying not to become alligator bait! Uncle: Well, you must learn to multi-task! Uncle: This is monumental before. Never before we have captured a Shadowkhan! Tohru: It is... so cute! Tohru: Cookie-eating Shadowkhan! Tarakudo: How charming. Hak Foo (to Shadowkhan): Show Master Tarakudo your war faces! Tarakudo: Ooh, if I had a spine, it'd be tingling. Hak Foo, all Shadowkhan are deadly; you just need to be aware of their strengths. Hak Foo: You call these strong?! Jade (after vacuuming up Shadowkhan): You've been hosed. Uncle (translating poorly): Substitute mask removal ingredient is often "shoelace of giraffe". Aiyah! Giraffes do not wear shoes! Hak Foo: Good morning, Chan... and good night! Uncle: Japanese translation is not going well, Tohru. Unless ingredient we seek is 'lobster wearing corduroy pants'. Jade: There's more than one way to skin a ninja. Tohru: What is that? Uncle: Oil painting! Uncle must learn to take time out for Uncle! "Fright Fight Night" Jackie (leaving with the mask): Trick for you, treat for me!

Ratso (spots the mask): I know what I'm wearing for Halloween. Jackie: Jade! Jade: Who is Jade? I am Oni Booboo, mistress of the dark! Jade: Nice chicken suit! Captain Black: Bald eagle! Tarakudo: Pop quiz. Why is Jackie Chan not also here searching for the mask? Chow: Uh...? Tarakudo: Answer: Because Mr. Chan already has the mask. Ratso: I knew that! Tarakudo: End of quiz. Now for the pop. [blasts Chow and Ratso across the room] Paco: I have mucho competition in the scary department. Tarakudo: Believe me, you have no competition. Paco: Are you the Great Pumpkin? Tarakudo: Uh... indeed! and I'm here to show all ghoulies, goblins, and demons how to be as scary as they can be. Paco: Teach me, Great One! Tarakudo: All you need do is feel the darkness within... Jackie: Shadowkhan! Jade: Slimy, slithering, made-for-Halloween Shadowkhan! Paco: Shadowkhan are excellent minions of darkness, are they not, Jade? Tarakudo: Spiffy costume. Rehearsing your inevitable return to the dark side? Jade: Maybe so... Tarakudo... Tarakudo: Tsk, tsk, Mr. Chan. No mask? [slams a pumpkin into Jackie's head] Much better! Jackie-o-Lantern. Now it's time to send you to the pumpkin patch. El Toro: I would prefer the onion field! [throws onion at Tarakudo] Paco: No contest; I am the scariest! Which means you no longer need to wear a mask. Jade: Heh, but I'm not wearing a mask! Paco (sharpens his claws): I know. I am the winner, and second place... loses face. El Toro (weakly): I will pin Paco, after a brief siesta. Jade: Smash him, El Toro! Jackie: Jade! He's still Paco. Jade: Hehe, sorry, I was in the moment!

"The Good Guys" Jade: Easy does it, Jackie! Jackie: Ah! Jade! Why do you have to show up every time? Jade: You'd miss me if I didn't. [cut to Dark Hand] Finn: Why does he have to show up every time? Jade: Hey, Finn, I'll hold that for ya!

Finn: Aw, thanks! Hey, give it! Finn: So much for our wealth. Ratso: At least we have our health... [they fall] Finn: Shut up, Ratso! Finn: We weren't always bad guys! Jade: Let me guess, you sang in disco bands at weddings. Chow: I was employee of the month at Sunglass Shack, three times! Ratso: I studied theoretical physics! Chow: We only went bad because we fell in with the wrong crowd. Ratso: Yeah. Each other! Uncle: Dark magic reversed cosmic yin and yang while we were getting lo mein! Finn (to Strikemaster Ice): Freeze! Back away from our Bosley! Uh... I mean, buddy. Jackie: Jade! What are you doing here? And why did you bring them? Jade: It's all part of their good-guy training. They can sit around at home being good, or they can go out and do good. Jackie: Or get smacked down... real good. Chow (seeing the Zu Monastery): Whoa! Just like the pimply kid said. Ratso: "Floating above the clouds... yo yo yo"... Strikemaster Ice: Yeah, see how you like preachin' peace with your temple in pieces! Lock 'em up, boys. Jackie (to Strikemaster Ice): You know, your Crane Stance could use some work. Strikemaster Ice (to Jackie Chan): That's it; you're history! Finn: Wait... we can't let Chan go out like this. Ratso: Yeah. After all the times we tried to knock him off... Chow: ...letting someone else do the job, just doesn't seem right. Finn: Let's rescue the Chan man! Finn: Ah, you know, we're not very good at being bad guys either. "Rise of the Dragons" Jade (in the junkyard): Is it just me, or is this place a dump? Uncle (about Future Jade): Who is this stranger? Jade: Beats me, but she kind of rocks! Jade: Why didn't you just tell Jackie and Uncle who you were back there? Future Jade: I didn't have time to convince them. Too busy trying to save the future. Jade: From... what? [Drago crashes through the roof] Future Jade: Him! Shendu's son! Drago: Please, call me Drago! Hey, you two related? Because I definitely see a resemblance here. Future Jade: Resemble this, Junior! [blasts him with the Dragon Talisman] Jade: Drago's a hot head.

Future Jade: Like father like son. Drago (blasting the Dragon Talisman to dust): Fire magic. It does a talisman good! Drago: Ah, Mr. Jackie Chan. My dad sends his best! Jackie: Your father? Who is your father? [Drago shoots a fire blast at him] Jackie: Ah, never mind! I have a pretty good idea, thank you! Jackie: Jade? Jade, Future Jade: Yes, Jackie! Jackie: ...explain! Jade: Say, are you sure he's Shendu's kid? Future Jade: Who, the Tooth Fairy here? Jade: Tch, I mean, Shendu had edge, but this Drago dude's more like... Future Jade: ... a gecko with zits? "The J-Tots" Chang: No one can stop the Chang Gang! Not even... the J-Team! Tohru: The coast is clear. Jackie: Move quickly, Tohru. Jade must not find out that Captain Black is assembling the JTeam, or she will hatch another kooky-Jade: Jackie, I hatched a mondo plan to take down the J-Team's arch-nemesis, Bartholomew Chang. I'll tell you all about it on the way to Section 13! Captain Black: While in prison, Chang managed to recruit an elite team, each possessing skills matching your own. An anti J-team, if you will. Viper: Knockoffs are never as good as the originals. Captain Black: Don't be too sure, Viper. Meet master thief Phillip Crane. He's pulled heists on several international museums: the Louvre, Guggenheim, Mufizi, Tate Viper: I hit each of those back when I was a thief. Captain Black: Not on the same day. Viper: Oh. Captain Black: El Toro, meet your counterpart: Bob "The Bopper" Hathcock, pro wrestler gone renegade. His trademark move -- "Bopper's Bash". El Toro: "Bopper's Bash"... Uh, uh, I mean, everyone knows American wrestling is fake! Captain Black: Tohru, say hello to Helga Sorenson. She held the World's Strongest Woman title before throwing it away for a life of crime. Tohru: How strong could a woman be? Captain Black: Here's Helga lifting the world's strongest man. [Tohru gulps] Jackie: And my dance partner would be? Captain Black: Little Tony Chung. Don't be fooled by the glasses. He's the most feared martial artist on China's Most Wanted list. Jackie: Guess he's not as cuddly as he looks. Chang: Ah, green; the color of jade! Jackie: Really, Chang, you should consider taking up a legal past time. Viper: Collecting baseball cards, snow globes maybe? Chang: Warriors, attack! Crane: Jolly good! Viper: Where did you pick up that accent? Spies-R-Us?

Crane: The same place where I picked up this little gem. [activates smoke emitting wristwatch] Bopper: I'll hang your mask on my mantel! El Toro: El Toro Fuerte never removes his mask! Paco: El Toro... is el nino? Chang: If you brats don't mind... go find a busy street to play in while the grownups steal a fortune in jade! Child Tohru: Uh... friends? Helga: I will break you. Child Viper: V! V! (singing) V - My name is Viper. My boyfriend's name is Van. He lives in Venuezela, and he picks violets when he can! Child Uncle: Ai-yah! What have you done to us, Jade? Jade: Well, let's see; I turned Jackie into a roughouser, Tohru into a crybaby, Viper into a girlygirl, and El Toro into... (sniffs) Child El Toro: Sorry. Jade: P.U! Paco, maybe you should change your hero? Child El Toro: El Toro Fuerte never removes his pants! "Half a Mask of Kung-Fu" Jackie: www.alfiesantiqueauctions.com? Oh, bad day! Uncle: www.dotwhatdot.who!? Uncle sent you to find oni mask and you return with gibberish? Jade: Hello, it's not gibberish, it's a site on the web! Uncle: Oh, the mask has been taken by giant spider? Jade: The World Wide Web! It's for sale on the Internet! See? Uncle: So many antiques! For sale? Jade, why did you not tell Uncle your waffle-iron was magic? Jade (to Valmont): You're Filthyrich1? But you're not rich; just filthy! Jackie: Believe me, Valmont, you do not want to wear that mask. Valmont: I'll do what I please with the mask I purchased fair and square... with stolen money! Jade: A broken mask won't work. Will it? [Valmont summons Shadowkhan] Jackie: He only has... half his Shadowkhan? Jade: Maybe they'll be half as dangerous? Valmont: On the contrary, half is more than enough to destroy you completely! Jackie: Can you make more potion? Tohru: The key ingredient is Japanese monkey tears, and sensei still has the monkey. Jackie: Why in the world did you put that thing on your face? Jade: Duh! To save us from Valmont's Shadowkhan! Besides, now that it's attached, Valmont can't take it! Jackie: But who is going to save us from you? The mask is evil, Jade! It is a matter of time before it turns you evil too! Jade: Tch, I can handle it! One: it's only half the evil of a regular mask, and two: [demonic voice] the next time you call me crazy, I shall devour your brains! [regular voice] Heh, see your point! Uncle: Key ingredient is Japanese monkey tears!

Jackie: But Tohru said you still had the monkey! Uncle: Monkey, yes! Tears, no! Japanese monkeys are not sentimental creatures! They weep only once every seven years! Besides, Uncle has no time to make potion. Too busy selling antiques with Jade's magic waffle iron! Valmont [demonic voice]: Surrender my face, or face obliteration! Jade: My guys can take 'em, Jackie. Go grab the potion! Jackie: No, I cannot let you-Jade [demonic voice]: Do not question me! Tohru: Jade, I will have to buy you a new computer. I'm afraid that Sensei has crashed this one. Jade: Tch, crashes are a cinch to fix. Just hit the reset button and-Tohru: Uh, no, I mean he has crashed it. Onto the floor. Uncle: Ai-yah! Uncle's antique auctions have vanished! Magic waffle-iron is forged from dark magic. It is evil! Evil! Evil! "Ninja Twilight" Jade: Getting warm, warmer, boiling... [spots mask] cooked! This seems way too easy, doesn't it? Jackie: Easy? We are the bottom of the ocean! Jade: Yeah, but, this is the last oni mask! Where are Tarakudo and his goons! Where's the ultimate good-vs-evil battle royale? Jackie: I, for one, am not complaining! [the masks are coming apart] Jackie: How is this happening? Uncle: Uncle not sure... but it must be your fault! Ikazuki: Many thanks for our freedom, Chan! Now it is time to surrender yours! Uncle: Dark forces are not attacking? Tohru: The combined power of the nine masks can summon enough Shadowkhan to engulf the Earth in eternal darkness. Viper: Watch out, boys! Snake in the grass! Super Moose: I'm bad! You're a fad! Super Moose: Can you feel the love? Can you punch? Tarakudo: Within hours, this planet will succumb to the forces of-[Tarakudo shudders] Ikazuki: The forces of... oooh? Tarakudo: I'm picking up some... interference. Ikazuki: It would seem humankind's last line of defense... Tarakudo: ...has reached the end of their line! Allowing our generals to resume their progress towards making this world... a much darker place! Uncle: Tarakudo hid the mask in the one place no mortal would dare enter -- the Shadow Realm! El Toro: But how do we get out of here? Viper: And into there? Uncle: We need not leave this cell. All shadows lead to the Shadow Realm. All that we need is dark magic to take us there!

Jade: Easy! As any ex-Queen of the Shadowkhan can tell you, wearing the sign of Tarakudo gives you control over ninjas! It's tattoo time! Jackie: No, Jade! It is far too dangerous, even if you have done it before. Uncle: I volunteer Tohru! Tohru: Wha-wha-buh-but m-me? Uncle: There is no time to face your fear of oni than when fate of world is at stake! Now, enter Shadow Realm quickly! Tohru: How do I...? Uncle: Call upon darkness which now lies within you. [Shadowkhan appear] Jade: You're the boss, T. Just tell 'em what to do! Tohru [to Shadowkhan]: Take me to... the Shadow Realm! Uncle: One more thing: Uncle never leaves shop without magic socks! Jackie: He cannot be serious! Jade: Be thankful that he's not talking underwear. Uncle: Tohru had better find mask before we run out of sock... and before evil wizard tattoo consumes his very being! Uncle: Jackie! Uncle needs ingredient to complete spell. Jackie: What ingredient? Uncle: Hair of Japanese samurai! Tarakudo: Shame that ancient Japan is ancient history! [after Tarakudo regains his body] Jade: Whoa, Tarakudo has legs! Did your spell do this, Uncle? Uncle: Of course! It is the only way for mask to stick to face! Tarakudo: Over my demon body! Jackie: No mental powers, Tarakudo? It is about time you fought fair. Jade: 10 demons and a kajillion ninjas in one teeny-tiny mask? Cozy! Tohru: So, there are no more masks? Uncle: Does Tohru have willies? No? Then there are no more masks! Jackie: Thanks... to the winning team. Jade - Dog and Rat Viper - Snake and Dragon El Toro - Ox and Rooster Tohru - Pig and Monkey Jackie - Rabbit and "Relics of Demons Past" Drago: I am Drago, the son of Shendu! Serve me well now and be at my side when I rule the world! Chow: Uh... sorry, kid, but your old man kind of burned us. Ratso: Yeah, and I got the scars to prove it. Drago: You're turning me down? Finn: Look, all that world domination stuff just don't pay the rent. Jade: But... what about freedom of expression? This is America, you know! Jackie: Jade, this has nothing to do with free speech, and everything to do with self-control. Promise me: no more burping. Jade: Fine. I'll just explode from all the pent-up gas before I'm sixteen! [Finn blows up a car]

Finn: I see a bus pass in your future. Captain Black: And I see prison stripes in yours. Chow: Jackie Chan! Long time no rumble! Captain Black: Claws up, Drago! Drago: With pleasure! Jackie: All of this for a fan? Uncle: Not a fan; the Fan of the Immortals! Dragon teenybopper wants to absorb its powerful Wind Demon chi! Chow (about Drago): This guy's worse than his old man! Ratso: But he looks so peaceful. Finn: Yeah, so do cobras just before they strike. Jade: Ah! What's wrong with me? Drago: You're short, you're green, and a real pain in the butt! So stick out your chi and say ah! Drago: I'm going to need to see your hall pass! Drago: Sorry, your minutes have expired. And now, so have you! Finn: Drago wants the Wind Demon chi. Jade: Isn't he enough of a blowhard already? Finn: Uh... a little help here, boss? Drago: Weak and worthless! You're fired! [Drago drains the demon chi from the Enforcers] "It's All in the Game" Drago: Ugh! Henchmen! Waste of time, excess baggage! Killing my mojo! Solo is the way to go! Uncle: What about personal property? Woman: We ship it. You should get it in about a week... or six. Jade: Flat-screen TV, here I come! Jade: I win! I win! I win! I win! Drago: That's where you're wrong, short stuff! I win! Drago: Water, water, everywhere, and more than an ocean to drink! [after Drago absorbs Water Demon chi] Jackie: Nice trick, Drago, but if you ask me, your act is all wet! Drago: Nobody likes a critic, Chan! "Black & White & Chi All Over" Jackie: Did you come to Section 13 to turn yourself in? Drago: In your dreams, Chan! I'm here to throw a little barbecue... [Alarms blast] Drago: Huh? Captain Black: You're surrounded, Drago. Game's over! Drago: Over? I'm just getting warmed up!

Drago: Aargh! Surrounded! Outnumbered! Maybe I shouldn't have gone solo... but I will not repeat your mistakes, Father! I will find the biggest, baddest henchmen in the world, and fulfill my destiny! [at henchmen auditions] Strikemaster Ice (to Drago): Yo, dude. You've seen the rest, now eyeball the best! Drago: What's your name? Strikemaster Ice: They call me Strikemaster Ice. And this here's my crew, D.J. Fist and M.C. Cobra. [Drago goes into a trance] Strikemaster Ice: Yo, gecko-boy be buggin'! Drago (to Strikemaster Ice and his crew): You each now have a small piece of my Fire Demon power. (to M.C. Cobra) Dragon speed! (to D.J. Fist) Dragon strength! (to Strikemaster Ice) And dragon breath! Strikemaster Ice: That'll work! Salesman: May I help you? Jackie: Uh, it's a... Flower Freshness Detector! My Uncle is very picky! Drago: So am I! I want a flower that smells like demon chi! Tohru: Drago! Jackie: And... Strikemaster Ice? Jade: Hey, Pizza Face got a Drago makeover! Strikemaster Ice: Yo, dawg, you didn't say nothing about putting a hurt on Chan! First day on the job, and we already gettin' a bonus! Drago (picking flowers): Chi loves me, chi loves me not! Drago (to henchmen): Was that a joke back there? Did I hire clowns? I give you powers beyond your wildest imagination and you amateurs can't get past an archaeologist, a tub of guts, and old man, and a little girl? Uncle (watching floating panda): Moon Demon chi: control over gravity! Uncle: Jackie! Do not let Drago touch you; he will try to drain demon chi! Drago: Oh, I won't just touch you, Chan! I'll rip you apart! Strikemaster Ice: Yo, shortstop, why don't you let the grownups handle this, a'ight? Jade: Afraid I'll whoop your butts again? Strikemaster Ice: You got the crust, little lady; let's see if you got the sauce! [Strikemaster Ice and his crew are trapped under the Earth] Strikemaster Ice (to Drago): Yo, D, a little hizzle? [Drago roars] "Dragon Scouts" [after the bad guys' shoes stick to the ground] Jackie: High heat and rubber soles make for a sticky situation! Jackie: At first, I suspected the Enforcers, but they were sent to prison last month. Captain Black: And released three days ago. The court ordered them to serve out the rest of their sentence doing community service. Jackie: If they are back to their old ways, the community does need that kind of service.

Jade: I quit the Buttercups! Jackie: What? Why? Jade: Quilt-making? Cookie-selling? Hello! If I wanted to be bored out of my gourd, I could just hang here with you and Uncle! Uncle: You want excitement? Sweep up shop! Jackie (to Finn): Perhaps you have something to hide! Chow: Perhaps you don't hear so good! Frank (Finn), Charlie (Chow), and Rocko (Ratso) Jackie: Oh! You are janitors! Chow: Hey! Custodial engineers! Finn: Ot-nay in front of the ephews-nay! Look, Chan, the whole reason we want the kids to be scouts. Ratso: So they don't end up bums, like us. Jackie: Jade, we must not pre-judge. Sometimes, the apple falls far from the tree. Jade: Til it hits the ground and turns rotten. Charlie: She's a wannabe, same as her uncle! Jade: Uh, reality check? My uncle's a wannabe? Charlie: Uh, yeah? We got the 411, how your Unc is bunk! Rocko: Heheh, Unc is bunk! Charlie: Can't even hold down a job! Frank: Wishes he was big time like our Uncles! Charlie: Which is why he's always following them around! All: Loser! Jade: Hey! The only reason Jackie's always tailing your uncles is because they're low-life crooks! Frank: Jade definitely needs an attitude adjustment! Charlie: She's a bad egg! Rocko: I like eggs! Over easy... Chow: If you need some parenting tips, Chan, I'm here for ya! Uncle (spots Jade levitating): Ai-yah! Magic is not to be trifled with! Jackie: Hand over the talisman, Jade--OW! Uncle: As long as you are up there, clean cobwebs from ceiling! Jackie: I have caught you red-handed with... toilet paper? Ratso: We're running low at home? Chow: What are ya gonna do, call the Potty Patrol? Frank (to Jade): Yo! That's my locker! Charlie: Back away, or you're gonna pay! Jade: It's... the museum curator! Charlie: Whoa, didn't see that coming! Frank: Inside job! Rocko: Yeah! Inside where? Finn: The only street we're gonna be working from now is Easy Street! Finn: Thanks. Maybe, who knows, someday we can redeem ourselves. Become the upstanding, lawabiding citizens they think we are. [pause] Nah

Chow: No way. Ratso: I don't think so. Finn: Scary thought. Ratso: Be laughing if I could be breathe. "The Demon Beneath my Wings" Jackie: Jade, what are you doing here? Jade: Tch, like I'm going to come all the way to Australia and not ride a kangaroo? Drago: Try to throw this shrimp on the barbie! Jade: Hey, since we're still on Australian time, technically it's tomorrow and I've already been to school! Jackie: Ha ha. A for effort, but F for logic. Uncle: Ai-yah! Sky Demon chi did not transfer into containment tank! Jackie: You need help? Uncle: Yes, very important. Write down: mung bean, loaf of garlic, essence of sea salt, and mustard on whole what. Jackie: These ingredients will repair Chi-o-Matic? Uncle: No! Ingredients for sandwich! You fix Uncle's snack, Uncle will fix Chi-o-Matic! Drew: Whoa! Total creep-fest! Jade: Please! Total tourist trap! Drago: Did I scare you? Jade: Yeah! But... looks aren't everything! Drago: I want the Sky Demon chi! It's here; I can smell it! Ms. Hartman: What do you want? Drago: What do you think, lady? You just sprouted wings out of thin air? You have my Sky Demon chi and I want it back! [Ms. Hartman knocks Drago back] Ms. Hartman: Maybe next time you'll remember the magic words! Jackie: Uh... Uncle? This place... Explain! Uncle: Double dose of demon chi has awakened angry spirits in house! Ms. Hartman: Well, this has certainly been more exciting than grading papers. Jade: I think it's about time we got you back to normal. Ms. Hartman: Oh. But I was considering flying south for the winter... "Mirror Mirror" Uncle: The city of Honglu, Uncle's home town! Uncle cannot believe this is last time he will ever see it! Jackie: That must mark how high the flood waters will rise, when the new dam is finished. Tohru: Everything will be submerged? Uncle: The original birthplace of the Chan family, gone. Forever. That is why Uncle needed to come, and this is why the two of you needed to join me! Jackie: Perhaps we should visit the temple anyway. There may be articles inside worth preserving. Uncle: Thank you, big-headed know-it-all, for your input, but I think Uncle knows more about Ming Shan Temple than you. Some things are better left at the bottom of the river. Now, as I was

saying, third-cousin-once-removed's house was there! He still owes Uncle money... Uncle: Touch nothing! Were Uncle's lips not moving? Did word's about Temple not come out of Uncle's mouth? Why no one ever listen to Uncle? Jackie: We weren't ignoring you, but we have to find Jade. Perhaps we should split up... unless you think I'm being a know-it-all again? Uncle: Touch nothing else... big-head! Mirror Spirit (to Jade): Well, if you're going to be a stubborn mule about it! All: Stubborn mule! Stubborn mule! Stubborn mule-Tohru: Jade! What are you doing? Uncle warned you not to come inside the Temple! It's too dangerous! Jade: Like I haven't seen danger before! Stop being so overprotective! You're starting to act like your mother! Tohru: I am not like my mother! Mirror spirits: Just like your mother! Who's your mommy? Mother may I? LIGHT! Uncle: Dark magic! Why do I bother speaking? [after the Mirror Spirits cast their spells] Jade: Oh no! I'm a mule! A stubborn mule! Jackie: My head! It's huge! Tohru: I'm turning into my mother! [Uncle claps] Jade: It's like someone hit Uncle's mute button! Tohru (as mother): Sometimes wishes do come true! Jade: Sorry, Uncle. I guess I should have been listening. Jackie: Me too. Uncle: Apologies accepted. But Tohru is another story! Mirror spirits turning you into mother is no excuse for the way you talked to Uncle, especially when nobody can hear Uncle's snappy comebacks! Vanessa Barone, Angus McGudgeon & Haggis, Ice Kidnapper Guy, Evil Monk "Antler Action" Strikemaster Ice: Yo, why do you gotta wake me up, dawg? My dream was off the hook! Larry: Demons? There's no such thing! Fire-breathing lizardmen maybe, but not demons! Larry: This is my city. San Francisco: the city I've sworn to protect. I am... uh... I... uh... ooh Spectacu-Larry! Larry: I'm... uh... I'm turning into Super Moose! Drago: What you're turning into is a major pain in my tail! Drago (to Larry): A hero ain't nothin' but a sandwich... mama's boy! Uncle (chanting): Yu mo gwai gui fai di zhou, yu mo gwai gui fai di zhou... Larry: What trickery is this? Jade: He's taking away your powers, Larry. It's for your own good! Larry: I thought I could trust you! You have betrayed me! [blasts the Chans] Once my friends... now my enemies! Uncle: His transformation into Earth Demon Dai Gui is nearly complete!

"Clash of the Titanics" Jade: Titanic, Oceanic, potato po-tah-to. It's still deep-sea salvage and that is mondo-coolio! Jackie: It is mondo-dangerous, Jade. The ship sits at the bottom of an icy ocean. Drago: And where do you three snowbunnies think you're off to? Strikemaster Ice: Gonna bust a move on some fresh powder, dawg. Drago: Wrong answer, dawg! [breathes fire at him] All: Whoa! Strikemaster Ice: A'ight, I-I feel ya, D. You vibin' on some new demon chi. Drago: Well? Strikemaster Ice: It's all good, dawg. We got everything we need! Drago: You've got a submarine in there? Strikemaster Ice: Naw, we got tools! Cobra and Fist are gonna build you one! Drago: I wouldn't trust those two to mow my lawn! Strikemaster Ice (to D.J. Fist): Yo, we don't ski until we get the chi, ya feel me? Uncle: Ai-yah! Giant crab monster! Jade: I never thought I would be on this side of a submarine sandwich! Jade: Uncle, isn't there some kind of... Crab-B-Gone mojo you can do? Uncle: Magic must defeat magic, not overgrown shellfish! Jackie: You are right Uncle! [takes controls] Crab must defeat crab! Jackie: It is an enormous ship. Finding the castanets among the wreckage will not be easy. Uncle: So use Chi-O-Matic! Jackie: Underwater? Uncle: The bag seals in freshness! Jade: No problem! I'll go! Jackie: No you will not. I will go. Jade: Fine. But only because you weigh more. A lot more! A whole lot-Uncle: Jackie, do not surface too quickly or you will get the 'bends'! Jade: He gets a German luxury car? Jackie: No, Jade, the bends is a condition that occurs if a diver rises too quickly. Jade: You brought a hairdryer on a deep-sea mission? Tohru: Ocean air gives me the frizzies. Jackie: Hello, neighbors! Nice day! Strikemaster Ice: Aww yeah; nice day to bust open a can of whoop-Chan! Strikemaster Ice: Alright, fool, enough reindeer games. Hand over the castanets! Jackie: Cast a net? Oh, we go fishing? I like fishies! Strikemaster Ice: Chan, you feelin' alright? Jackie: Pretty keen! Jade: Didn't anyone ever tell you that smoking is bad for your health? Strikemaster Ice: Shrimp, you headin' for the barbie! Tohru: Jackie, are you all right? Jackie: Yes, but you two are very wobbly. 'Wobbly' is a funny word. Rhymes with gobbly!

Jade: He has so got the bends. Jackie: I do? Oh, what a nice car! [Drago breaks into the ship] Drago: Crunchy metal outside, gooey chi filling inside! Uncle: You want a piece of Uncle? Drago: There'll be several pieces of Uncle when I'm through! Drago: Anyone up for some flame-enco dancing? [starts blasting] Uncle: Ai-yah! Drago is absorbing power of Tchang Zu, the Thunder Demon! Jackie: Pretty! Drago [as Elvis]: Tchang Zu. Tchang Zu very much! (normal voice) And don't even think about following me! [destroys their boat] Much as I'd love to stay and chill, I'll leave that to you! "Stealing Thunder" Uncle: Chi-o-Matic senses the presence of dual demon chi; Drago must be near! Jade: So let's throw him a little surprise party, Chan-style! M.C. Cobra: Yo, girlfriend, you're disrespecting my hizz-ouse! Jade: My bad! I meant to dis you! Strikemaster Ice: You're way out of your league, Gramps! Uncle: Smartypants teenager want a piece of 'Gramps'? Tohru: Double mocha latte, or choca-cino steam expresso, or double-decaf half-caf with a twist-Uncle: Hot-cha! Coffee is coffee! Jackie: Where is Drago? Strikemaster Ice: Kickin' in his new digs, where else? Love to stay and jaw, but we've burned too much daylight as it is. Peace! Drago: The storm's almost here! Finish securing the lightning rod! M.C. Cobra: You got it, dawg! I mean, sir! Dawg-sir! Strikemaster Ice (to Tohru): It looks like it's just you and me, Homes. Mano a sumo! Drago: You can't defeat me! I'm on top of the world! Jackie: I have reconsidered. If you promise to play only after your homework is completed, you may have a Robo-Mercs game. Jade: No thanks, Uncle Jackie. Been there, done that! [Tohru shows up with a giant Robo-Mercs] Tohru: Jade, I do not believe this will fit in the overhead compartment. "Weight & See" Tohru: I... I can't make it! Jade: 'Can't' Isn't in our vocabulary! Feel the burn! Jackie: 'Ancient Rice and Artifacts Collection'? Rice? I thought we were searching for a drum? Maybe that thing is broken! Maybe it's that new containment jar! Uncle: Since when are you big-time expert? New containment not the problem! Uncle made so device can hold more than one demon chi at once! Does not affect the way the detector works! Now, knock!

Uncle: Uncle knows that people collect many things! But rice? Drago: Chan-fried rice, anyone? Jackie: Drago! Drago: I'd say it was good to see you, Chan, but why start the day with a big fat lie? Jade (singing): Eating right is what you dig! If you don't your butt's too big! Drago: I can't believe we're back in this lame junkyard! Space Needle lair? Gone! The Thunder Demon chi? Gone! And any faith that I had that you three were strong enough to defeat Jackie Chan? Gone! Strikemaster Ice: Yo, dude, step off the blame game! It wasn't our fault! Drago: Then who's fault was it? M.C. Cobra: Yours? [Drago grabs him] Drago: You wanna guess again? M.C. Cobra (nervously): N-nah, I'm cool! Drago: I'm through losing everything to Jackie Chan. I want that Mountain Demon chi, and then it's payback time, oh yeah! It's going to be something Chan's never gonna forget! But first thing's first! [Drago leaps into the air] Strikemaster Ice: Uh... we supposed to follow him or what? Jackie: How is it possible? None of these chopsticks contain the demon chi? Uncle: Maybe you dropped pair? Jackie: I did not drop anything! Besides, you were the one holding the bag! Just admit that I'm right: that machine of yours has gone haywire! Uncle: Uncle not saying 'yes'. Uncle not saying 'no'. Uncle not saying 'haywire'. Uncle will run tests! Happy? Jade: You've got to be kidding me! Seven more pounds in one day! Tohru: Uhh Jade: Don't even tell me that you're not cheating, because I know you are! Tohru: I may have been... snacking. Jade: On what? Concrete? Uncle: Uncle has been robbed! Jackie: What did they take? Ancient carvings? Rare paintings? Uncle: Bagels! Jackie: Bagels? Jade: Bagels. Tohru: Huh. Uncle: Doughnuts, soup, hummus... everything's gone! Jackie: What kind of thief steals only food? Uncle: Hungry thief! Calling police, put out APB for Uncle's cream cheese! Drago (into headset): Approaching target of opportunity. 200 yards and closing... continue stealth mode! M.C. Cobra: Why's he talkin' into the headset? Y'know, we're right here! Strikemaster Ice: Hey, dude's into protocol! Drago: Game over, Chan! Strikemaster Ice: Whoa, looks like someone already crizz-ashed this par-tay!

Drago: You're going to pay for that! Uncle: Uncle does not have cash. How about I.O.U.? [Uncle begins chanting to remove Drago's Fire Demon chi] "J2 Revisited" Tohru: My feet could use a coat of sun block... Jade: No offense, but I'd rather kiss a sand crab! Uncle: A chi wizard must learn from his defeats as well as his victories! Jimmy: Is Uncle always that cranky? Tohru: No. He is in a particularly good mood today. Iso (after finding Jade and Future Jade): This must be lucky day! One bargain: two Jades for the price of one! Iso (chanting): Ju ichi bu shun li! Future Jimmy: Jade, just listen! I figured out a spell to locate the other half of the orb. Yu mo gwai gui fai di zhao, yu mo gwai gui fai di zhao! Jade: Whoa, that's Eagle's Peak, a dormant volcano just outside the city! Jimmy, you're a genius! You up for a little rock climbing? Future Jimmy: Me? I'm not a field agent! But if I were, and I needed to do something major to win back my job... Jade: I knew there was a reason we became friends! Uncle: Of course, the other half of Arcanum was on top of volcanic mountain! A yang location, earthy and hot! Jackie: Well done, Uncle! Uncle: Uncle was not responsible. Tohru? Jade: Actually, it was... Future Jimmy: Me! It took me over ten years of research, but now I'm going to reap the rewards. Future Jade: 'Reap the rewards'? Jimmy, what are you talking about? Future Jimmy: Actually, call me Iso! Iso: Since I never fit into cliques, it's time to create my own! [chanting] Ju ichi bu shun li... Captain Black: He has an endless army of Isos! How do we stop him? Future Jade: Magic must defeat magic. Captain Black: Hold the line! Jade (points to Future Jade): That's me! Do I rock or what? Jimmy: What about me? Jade: You're... more like disco. Jimmy (to Future Jimmy): I may be a freakoid now, but there's no way I'm turning into a megaloser like you! "The Powers That Be Pt. 1" Waitress: Refill, hun?

Captain Black: Thanks! Ah, to have a few moments before heading into the office. Waitress: So what do you do? Captain Black: I'm in... uh... pest control. Strikemaster Ice: You just need to put a little ice on that. Strikemaster Ice! Jade: Jackie? Drago: Ehh! Guess again! But your Uncle is a guest of mine, along with the old-timer and Captain Black. Jade: You touch one hair on their head -- well, not Captain Black, because he doesn't have any -- but you know what I mean! Drago: Be there or... Jade: ...be square? Drago: No! Be there or spend the rest of your wonder years being raised by that 500-pound sumo! Jade: Sheesh! Evil and a jerk! Tohru: Hmph. I weigh only 480! Drago: Everyone comfy? No? Good! Captain Black: Whatever it is you want, Drago, you're not going to get it! Drago: Oh, but I am. In 8 chi-licious flavors! Drago: See, this world of yours is a real yawn. And you know why? No demons! They're all stuck down under, while you humans run around like you own the place. Is that fair? No! Well, guess what? Planet's about to come under new management! And my first order of business will be... to turn this world inside out! Just imagine, a population of demons running amok, with me, Drago, pulling the strings! Yep, pretty soon now it's good-bye humanity and hello Demon-ville! Uncle: Dopey demon will not succeed. Drago: And why is that? Jackie: Because we are going to stop you! Drago: I thought I told you to stay nearby! They nearly escaped! Strikemaster Ice: Yeah, dawg, we noticed. Too much for you? Drago: I wouldn't take that tone with me if I were you. [Strikemaster Ice blasts him] Strikemaster Ice: You ain't the big cheese no more, D. Me and my posse got mad powers. You got zip! Drago: Yes, well, that's about to change. And when it does, I won't forget our little chat... Jade: Ah! Y-you're not scaring me! You're stuck in stone and can't do a thing! Shendu: Why so nervous? As you say, I am powerless in my current form... yet see how the very elements of your earthly realm shudder in my presence? Jade: Yeah, well, okay, whatever. Great special effects. Not! Shendu: I know why you are here. Jade: No way. Shendu: My ungrateful, traitor of a son, Drago. He is close to gaining possession of the demon powers. Jade: But it's not going to happen. Not on my watch. Shendu: Foolish child! There is but one power on Earth that can defeat Drago! And it is I, his father! Jade: We're on the same page, Rocky Road. [Jade hacks a chunk off of Shendu's statue] Shendu: What do you think you're doing-Jade: It's just a trim! You'll never miss it! Thanks! Er, don't get up; I'll let myself out.

Captain Black: Jackie, what if we break huddle, throw ourselves at the line, and allow Uncle to make end-run. Jackie: ... Captain Black: ...not a football fan. Got it. Uncle: He means you should create diversion! Jackie: Oh! Yes! Drago: I told you slackers to stay in the truck! Strikemaster Ice: Yeah, well us slackers kind of changed our minds about how this is gonna go down. M.C. Cobra: Figured, why let you get all the powers. Drago: You... want some of them? Strikemaster Ice: Naw, dawg. We want all of them! Drago: I may not have fire, but you're still toast! Jade: No Jackie, no containment unit. We had a deal! M.C. Cobra: Yeah, well my man D.J. Fist got the dealbreaker! Strikemaster Ice: Eight powers, three of us... let's see, we gotta divide that by eight, by three... aw, carry the--naw, see, we gotta--naw.... M.C. Drago: Two of us got three, one of us gets two. Strikemaster Ice: Okay, here's the dealio. D.J., you get Earth and Moon. D.J. Fist: ... Strikemaster Ice: See, those are the two best powers, yo, I'm doin' you a solid here... [D.J. Fist smiles] Captain Black: Jackie, you can't take them on. No arms, no legs... Jackie: No problem! It is simply a matter of balance! Uncle: Ai-yah! Something is rotten in Denmark! Drago [chanting]: Ya ga mee mo ya ga meecheewa! Drago: Take a last look of this world of yours, humans, because I'm about to turn it topsy-turvy, and all kinds of curvy! "The Powers That Be Pt. 2" Tohru: I hate fish! Captain Black: Okay, people, listen up; at 0300 hours, Drago absorbed all eight demon powers. I need all available equipment and personnel ready to deploy by dawn. This isn't going to be easy, but I know you're up to the task. The fate of the entire planet rests in our hands. Now let's move! Uncle: All these years, Black has learned nothing! Magic must defeat magic! Uncle: Drago has absorbed all eight demon powers. Do you know of a spell to remove them? Shendu: And why should I help you? Uncle: Revenge? Shendu: My son may have betrayed me, wizard, but I will watch proudly as he destroys your world. Once all eight powers have combined, nothing can remove them! Ever! Uncle: Then conversation is over! Shendu: Wait! Release me -- and I will deal with Drago, and see that you are spared! Uncle: That, Uncle cannot do! Shendu: Then your Earth is doomed! Strikemaster Ice: It was a misunderstanding, yo.

Drago: I don't suffer traitors well. [Drago transforms into a hideous monster] Strikemaster Ice: Yo, that is nasty! Uncle: Do you want Drago to turn world inside-out? No? Then let Uncle work! [closes door; reopens door] One more thing; hiyah! Chow: Whoa, take it easy old timer. Hak Foo: we are not here to harm you. Finn: We just heard about this 'Drago turning the world inside-out' thing. Ratso: I thought it was meteors coming. Chow: Hey, the world can't end now! We just got out of the slammer! It ain't fair! Finn: So, what do ya say, Unc? We're freelance, we're reasonably priced... Ratso: And we promise not to steal nothing! Uncle: Hmm... do not just stand there! Get cracking! [spots gigantic Drago] Captain Black: You have got to be kidding me. Jackie: Bad day. Drago: I was hoping you't put up a fight. Captain Black: It's go-time! Jackie (to D.J. Fist): You don't talk much, do you? Drago: I should prepare a proper welcome for my demon brethren. A city in ruins will make them feel right at home! Strikemaster Ice: Cool. Let's get this party started! Drago: No. I have a special task for you. [blasts the henchmen] I have given you each another a taste of demon chi. [to Strikemaster Ice] Earth! [to D.J. Fist] Thunder! [to M.C. Cobra] Wind! I want you to eliminate Section 13 and everyone in it, once and for all! Strikemaster Ice: Yo, yo, yo, the Ice Crew is in the hizz-ouse! Uncle: Scale of cod fish! Finn: Coming right up! Uncle: Tail of ground hog! Chow: I got it! Uncle: Powdered butterfly wing! Ratso: Monarch or swallowtail? El Toro: I thought you could use a hand, mes amigos? Jackie: El Toro! Viper: Heard you were having a shindig. Jackie: Viper! Er. [deeper voice] Viper. Paco: And do not forget El Paco Fuerte! Er... where is Jade? Uncle: Ai-yah! Spell will not work! Chow: So... the Earth is doomed? Ratso: But I like it here! My Mom lives close. Uncle: Ai-yah! Section 13 is rubble! Finn: Oh, bummer! Chow: Eh, never liked the place. Ratso: They had good doughnuts! Uncle: Stop! You want to earn paycheck? Yes? Then start digging!

Finn: Sure thing, boss. Ratso: I love manual labor! Hak Foo (grunting): Hungry gopher digs hole! Super Moose (singing): And puff goes the demon! Drago: If that's the best you can do, the future belongs to me! Shendu: I think not, boy! First, you must pay for your treachery! Drago: Dad? Strikemaster Ice: Yo, that thing's Drago's pop? Uncle: Demon must defeat demon! Drago: You're weak, old man! Conquest is a job for a fiery young dragon! Shendu: You are an impudent child! Drago: Father! Help me! Shendu: You deserve such a fate for your disloyalty! Drago: I'm sorry, Father! Please! Shendu: This is my domain! Remember your place. [Shendu reaches out to help him] Drago: Yes, Father... psych! [Drago and Shendu are fighting in the demon netherworld] Drago: The Earth was within my grasp! You never let me have what I want! Shendu: I told you not to play with your father's world! Drago: Why not? You aren't using it! You're always too busy fighting wizards! El Toro - Ox Jackie - Rabbit Captain Black - Dragon Viper - Snake D.J. Fist - Earth, Moon M.C. Cobra - Water, Thunder, Strikemaster Ice - Wind "The Journey of a Thousand Miles" Master Fung (voiceover): Thousands of years ago, a furious battle was waged between the great and noble Xiaolin Dragon Dashi, and the evil Heylin witch, Wuya. Thsi was the first Xiaolin Showdown. Wuya pitted her dark magic against Dashi and his mystical power objects, the Shen Gong Wu. In the end, Dashi triumphed and Wuya was forever imprisoned in a simple wooden puzzle box. The threat averted, Dashi spread his Shen Gong Wu around the Earth. For generations, they have simply maintained the balance between good and evil, and a long line of Xiaolin Dragons has stood ready to face evil, should that balance ever shift... Master Fung: Omi! Time to come in, young monk! Omi: But, Master Fung, my Lotus Strike ends an eight of the inch to the left! As a Xiaolin Dragon of the Water-Master Fung: You're not a Dragon yet, Omi. Omi: Yes, but I have been chosen to become one, and that means striving for and obtaining perfection! Master Fung: It also means having the sense to get out of the rain. Come, young monk. There are things I must tell you. Dojo: Calling it quits, kid? That Lotus Strike looked like it was pulling to the left...

Master Fung: Dojo? Don't you have a Scroll you're supposed to be guarding? Dojo: The Ancient Scroll of the Shen Gong Wu? 1500 years I've been watching it, and all it's done is gather dust! Master Fung: Each day holds new surprises, Dojo Kanojo Cho. Dojo: Okay, I'm going! I'm going! Master Fung: Speaking of surprises, I have one for you, Omi. New students are joining the Temple! [the other Dragons arrived] Master Fung: Omi, I would like you to meet Raimundo-Rai: Sup! Master Fung: --Kimiko-Kimiko (on the phone): He said that? No way! Master Fung: --and Clay. Clay: Howdy! Omi: Oh, what is that? Is it... magic? Kimiko: It's a PDA. I'm sending a message to a friend in Tokyo. Omi: A secret message? Kimiko: Noo... I'm just telling her I meant a very strange kid who apparently doesn't know about personal space issues. Omi: Really? Who? Is it that guy? [points to Clay] Clay: Not me, pardner! Raimundo: It's you, Chromedome! [Omi blushes] Omi: I am the teacher! You are the students! You will give me the respect I deserve! Raimundo: Respect this! [pulls Omi's pants down] Kimiko (on the phone): No way! The Brazilian kid just pantsed the bald kid! Jack Spicer: I want to rule the whole world! All of it! Not some of it, not just Iceland, or Fiji... I want to rule the whole world! Jack-Bot: Pardon me, sir? Jack Spicer: What? Can't you see I'm on an evil rant here? Jack-Bot: Yes, sir, but your father sent you a gift from Hong Kong. Jack Spicer: Oh! Puzzle box! [opens the box] Let's see... my prize is... a mask? Lame! [throws the mask away] Alright, to world conquest. My favorite pastime... now, let's see... Europe might not be a bad place to start, or is that too obvious? I could go for the unexpected, like Paraguay, but is that enough of an attention grabber? Could go down to Africa, over through South America-[Wuya emerges] Wuya: ...onward through Asia! Jack Spicer; Spooky ghost lady! Attack! [the Jack-Bots fire their weapons through Wuya] Wuya: Plans for world conquest? My dear boy, we have much in common. What's your name? Jack Spicer: Jack Spicer! Who are you? What are you? Wuya: Me? I'm your new best friend! Jack Spicer: Let me get this straight, Wuya: You have no physical form... Wuya: Very perceptive. Jack Spicer: ...so you need me to get these... 'Shen Gong Wu' things. But here's my question: what do I, Jack Spicer, evil genius, get out of this? Wuya: Your dreams of world conquest! We shall rule, side-by-side! Jack Spicer: I like where this is going. Okay, so once we get all the Shen Gong Wu, then what? [later]

Master Fung: ...the world will be thrown into ten thousand years of darkness. It is your most solemn duty as Xiaolin warriors to find all the Shen Gong Wu before Wuya does. Raimundo: I have a question. Master Fung: Yes, Raimundo? Raimundo: I saw my room, and no bed, just a mat. What's the dealie? [everybody stares at him] Raimundo: Um... we can talk later. Master Fung: Learning is a treasure that will follow its owner everywhere. Omi: The Ancient Scroll of the Shen Gong Wu! [Master Fung unravels the scroll] Master Fung: Ah, the Mantis Flip Coin! It has revealed itself! Whoever holds the coin will leap with the skill of a mantis. Omi: And so, our grand quest begins! Follow me, to victory! [charges off; pause] ...I have no idea where I'm going. Kimiko: Yeah, how do we find the Shen Gong Wu? Master Fung: Dojo, you helped Master Dashi hide them... Dojo: Yeah, but that was a long time ago. You can't possibly expect me to remember [starts vibrating] Gah! This way! [points] Raimundo: Right, like we're going to take direction from a gecko. Dojo: Gecko? [grows to giant size] Don't ever call me a gecko! [Raimundo turns off Omi's game] Omi: Yah! My little friend has been taken by the dark forces of evil! Pochi, are you in there? Can you hear the sound of my voice? [Kimiko hits Raimundo] Kimiko: Don't mess with the monk! Raimundo: Girl, you hit hard! Kimiko: No worries, Omi. The power just got switched off. See? [turns the game back on] Omi: Pochi! You have returned! I must remember to honor the power of the off-switch. [seeing the crowded city] Dojo: Whoa! A lot has changed in the past 1500 years! Jack Spicer: Bow before me, citizens of planet Earth! I now rule you with the Mantis Flip Coin! [jumps down to street level] Wuya: You cannot rule the Earth yet! You have but one Shen Gong Wu! Jack Spicer: How many are there? Wuya: Hundreds! Jack Spicer: What? Okay, you're going to have to get solid and help me out here! Jack Spicer: This Shen Gong Wu is mine! Raimundo: How does he know about Shen Gong Wu? Wuya: How indeed? Dojo: Wuya! The years have not been kind to you! Wuya: Mind your tongue, reptile! Dashi isn't here to protect you! Omi: Away, evil spirit! You cannot stop us! Jack Spicer: She can't. I can! Jack-Bots! [summons an army of Jack-bots]. ...mince them! [while flying away with the Mantis Flip Coin] Jack Spicer: A lesson for losers: don't mess with Jack Spicer! Raimundo: We'll do better next time! Dojo: Uh, next time is now! I'm sensing another Shen Gong Wu! Kimiko: Let's see what we've got. [She unravels the scroll] The Two-Ton Tunic! Dojo: Oh, I remember that. It was Dashi's invulnerable armor.

Kimiko: Ha, excellent! Spicer better watch his back! This one is ours! [reading the scroll] Kimiko: The Eye of Dashi! Clay: The way I figure it, it shoots lightning something fierce! [Omi and Jack are pulling at the Eye of Dashi] Jack Spicer: Hey, what's with the glowing? Omi: It... is a Xiaolin Showdown! Raimundo: It's a what now? Dojo: A Xiaolin Showdown! It's what happens when two warriors reach a stalemate over Shen Gong Wu. Two words: frea-ky! Omi: Jack Spicer, I challenge you to a Xiaolin Showdown. I wager my Two-Ton Tunic against your Mantis Flip Coin. Whoever reaches the last stone first wins the Eye of Dashi, and the other Shen Gong Wu as well! Wuya: Accept the challenge! Accept it! Jack Spicer: I accept your challenge, Omi. Omi: Let's go! Xiaolin Showdown! [the environment transforms] Omi: I did not expect this! Dojo: That's a Xiaolin Showdown for you. Gong Yi Tanpai! [pause] That means 'go'. [while in the lead] Jack Spicer: I've got this in the bag, but... it never hurts to cheat! Jack-Bots! I don't care, I don't wanna know how, just make him gone! Omi: I cannot fight with this heavy garment! [pause] It's not your weight... it's how you throw it around! [smashes the first Jack-Bot] Clay: That's showin' 'em! Omi: Honor the power of the off switch! [turns off the second Jack-Bot] Kimiko: Don't mess with the monk! Jack Spicer: Now that I've defeated you, perhaps you'll respect the genius of... Jack Spicer! Omi: Respect this! [Omi tugs down Jack's pants] Master Fung: The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. Dojo: Where do you get this stuff? Master Fung: I have a desk calendar. Omi: Master Fung, there are so many Shen Gong Wu left to be fou nd. Master Fung: Your new friends will help. Omi: Oh, yes, Master Fung! I have already taught much to Kimiko, Raimundo, and Clay. Master Fung: But Omi, they are here to teach you. Omi: But... I am the Chosen One! Master Fung: You aren't the only Chosen One. Some day, your new friends may become Dragons as well. Kimiko -- the Dragon of Fire; Clay -- the Dragon of Earth; and Raimundo -- the Dragon of Wind! "Like a Rock!" [after passing the obstacle course] Kimiko: Nice, Omi! 8 seconds faster than Raimundo! Rai: Yeah! You're one slippery little dude! Omi: I foolishly and shamefully lost a quarter second on the sand bags. As you might say, I smell bad!

Rai: I stink, not I smell bad. Omi: I 'stink'? Rai: Yeah, and you smell bad, too! Clay: So all I got to do is be the fastest to get to that doggie? Omi: Correct! Clay: Alright... Rai: Your record's safe; Clay's element is Earth -- speed of a rock! Kimiko: Ready, set, go! [Clay walks over and picks up the dog] Clay: Here you go! I think I shaved a few seconds off your record, Omi. [Rai and Kim laugh] Omi: But... but... you are supposed to go run and jump and kick! Clay: Well, I didn't see much point in all that whooping and hollering as long as I got the dog. Raimundo: Or, you knew you couldn't beat us with your old man kung-fu! Omi (laughing): Raimundo mocks Clay's tai chi by calling it 'old man kung-fu'! He implies Clay is like an old man doing kung fu! [Master Fung arrives] Kimiko: Omi, ix-nay on the easing-tay! Master Fung: Is there something funny about old men and their kung-fu, young monk? Omi: Master Fung! Master Fung: There is more to be a Xiaolin Dragon than running and jumping, young monk. Omi: Oh, yes, Master! There is kicking, too! Master Fung: True, but being a Xiaolin Dragon also means seeing the world in a different way. For example, finding simple solutions to complicated problems! Omi: In your head, Raimundo! Raimundo: In your face! Omi (dismissively): Talk to my fingers! [in Paris] Jack Spicer: Hmm, I like it! This Third-Arm Sash is tight! Wuya: Insolent boy, you are misusing the power of a Shen Gong Wu! Jack Spicer: Oh, come on! What's the point of taking over the world if you can't have a little fun? Wuya: This mime has magical abilities! [the Mime hits Jack in the stomach with an invisible golf ball] Yes! He may be of use to us! Or do you require another demonstration...? Dojo: That Fist of Tebigong must be close, 'cause I'm getting a wicked case of Shen Gong Wu rash! Kimiko: Could you be more specific? Dojo: Yeah, it kind of itches here, but it's more burning down here and behind my tail I got this unsightly cracking and-Kimiko: I meant with the location of the Shen Gong Wu! [after doing a backflip with the Mantis Flip Coin] Raimundo: I bet you wish you had this Shen Gong Wu. Omi: Yes! But you need it more than me! Omi: The battle is over, Jack Spicer! You lost! Jack Spicer (sarcastically): Whatever shall we do? Wuya: Perhaps they should meet our new friend: Le Mime! [after Le Mime traps the three monks] Jack Spicer: You kids have fun! We're off to grab the Fist of Tebigong.

[while Clay tries to figure out what they're doing in the box] Raimundo (in thick Southern accent): It's... some... sort... of... invisible... box! (regular voice) Hey, took him long enough! Dojo: Magic mime? They've always been obnoxious but now they're dangerous too! Omi: Our fate rests in Clay's hands. Kimiko: So what you're saying is... we're doomed. Raimundo: Nice knowing you guys! Omi: Raimundo, Kimiko! We must have faith in our comrade Clay! Raimundo: Old man kung-fu to the rescue? Pbbt, not in this life! Kimiko: Face it, Omi; if Clay's our last hope, we're hopeless. Raimundo: Good-bye, Fist of Tebigong... Kimiko: ...hello, ten thousand years of darkness! [facing the Mime] Clay: He's doing everything I do! Dojo: The mirror gag! I hate mimes! Raimundo: Oh, this is nice, huh? The three of us friends, having a few laughs together. But where's our fourth friend, Mr. Clay? Oh, that's right: he's losing the Fist of Tebigong to Jack Spicer! Did you guys forget that? Wuya: What are you waiting for? Vaporize them! Jack Spicer: Wuya, Wuya, Wuya, how long have you been at this villain game? Wuya: I wreaked havoc and destruction when the Earth was still young, and mankind was still crawling out of the mud! Jack Spicer: And yet you still make amateur mistake. Everyone knows: gloating first, then vaporizing!