Establishing

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an Identity 39

\' I II dl 1'11'1' 10 the second major comp n .nr () S 1(. 'onl"'1 iru.ion II 111 I tll(\' N oi.l'o(Fdefjllitioll, just as we hav b Ii -($Id iut our worth, II 1 II II h IV' beliefs about who we ar and what \V. :11", S( me IH I 1111, p~1 i .ularly adolescents, 1'1 seem to b - cl1ga" -d i 11 II, I 'Ill 'rate 1IIII,HI,llod-/intbcmselves, Othersappeartole I' .rncd primacily " III 11\11"lining or preserving " beliefs about therns lvcs. Still thcr II I oil - -11l to I now what they are now, but are int nt on di o ring "II IIll' l1\i.rht become, In every case, however, attempts I define lilt \'IJ'I't ~t1tin ertainbeliefs about the self, or what w shall refer to I I "r I'lfMjn age" or "identity.t" 'I'hl' lil'st sc tion of this essay will examine SOme of the interpersonal II P' -lor solf-eualaatio. Our primary focu will be on re-eualuation of ,II, 01' the possibility of change in level of self-esteem after adoles11'1\ " Ilowever, the section begins with a discussion of the initial iii -lupm 'nt of self-esteem, and an examination of some critical eleIII III 01 I HI'.nt-child interaction, After a description of several possiIt! 1)111101\\'$ of t:arly relationships, we turn to a consideration of straII I (' III f' mai ntaining self-esteem. The first section closes with a consitli t II 011 o( S 'If-exposure as a strategy for testing possibly invalid as111111'1 about self-worth, ons and an examination of some problems inIII 'II n obtaining useful "evaluative" feedback. ','II' "ond section of the essay examines the relevance of interper1111 I '1111 tI ionships to the process of self-definition. The section begins \ I ill II I rI 'f xamination of some ways an identity-is formed, and then I Ill' III' pr iblcms of maintaining an identity or self-image. The second 1'1 I on loses with consideration of the possibility of enlarging or ex'I'fldln/tt on's personal identity. The concept of "self-lessness" and 1111!'1Ilt- or" I scriptive" feedback from other persons are discussed II III (')11', t.

SELF-EVALUATION
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The process of learning about ourselves begins very early in life. Clearly not all of it involves. social interaction. The infant explores his body and experiences recurrent organic sensations which lead to the evolution of a sense of bodily self, He interacts with his physical environment and learns the distinction between what is himself and what is not himself. But the infant also learns very uickl t~t som~ of his actions elicit responses of approval, attention, love. Others seem to go unnotlcea. Still others' are responded to with withdrawal, coldness, or irritation, As he progresses from infancy to young childhood, he discovers more and more evaluative elements in the responses of others to his behavior, or to is self, -The result of these different responses to his acts soon becomes quite apparent, Acts that elicit responses of attention or app:oval..,?r a~~ction tend to occur In.-ore -an more frequently. Behavior iliat elicits wiUidrawal or coldness or rejection occurs less and less frequently.f Gradually the overt personality of the child, as manifested)n his behavior, i~ha...ed by the eo le with whom he interacts. . However, because of the human capacity for self-consciousness, the process of personality-formation is not entirely a matter of simple reinforcernent.. The child's patterns of behaviour arouse res on_ses lvithin himself leading to a set 0 perceptlOns 0 imse which beco~e stab e. Once self as a sea15llizing concept begins to emerge, the child associates certain of his acts with this self, even if others ignore or L punish them, In this case the acts may become a covert part of the child's self, and others' responses to those acts become judgments ~f parts of the- chilcPs self. ---~-~~ - - Mos 0 us w 0 are parents set an impossible task for ourselves: we want our children to believe that our love for them is unconditional but we' also want them to behave in -a reasonably acceptable manner. To accomplish the latter we must respond differentially to their behaviors, to the different parts of their selves that are, manifested in th~ir behavior, We must communicate approval in response to some, dISappr?val in response to others. A child must inevitably experience our dISapproval as a withholding or withdrawal of love, and thereiore 0111' love as conditional, regardless of our intentions and real feelings. >-It may be helpful.to think rather crudely of the evolution of a " OO? self" and a "bad self." We behave, and in doing so we always marufes t or ex ose a-part of our self. In some cases our behav~or elici.ts a response from others that we perceive as accepting, approving, loving. Thus we learn that certain p~rts of ourselves are acceptable and lov-

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