Buddy To Bedmate

Ross Jeffries Speed Seduction
From Buddy to Bedmate

Get Out Of The Friend Zone And Into The F**k Zone in 30 days Or Less
www.Seduction.com
Copyright 2009, Ghita Services, Inc. All Rights Reserved. This transcript may not be duplicated without written permission from the author.
Disclaimer
The Speed Seduction Coaching Program may contain viewpoints that may be considered controversial by certain audiences. It is intended as a powerful guide for self-respecting, intelligent men who are looking to avoid from "real-hate-shun-ships by default" and instead claim the happiness that they deserve. I, Ross Jeffries, Ghita Services., Inc, and/or Seduction.com (or any of our other websites or entities) cannot and will not be held responsible in any way for your actions, and will not be held liable for any and all claims from you or any other third party. You alone are responsible for your decisions and actions, even if they have an impact on others. This information is meant for "entertainment" purposes only. While this transcript contains information, tips, tools, and strategies that are recommended by us and, in most cases, have succeeded when applied by others, this product and its contents carry no warranty or guarantee (either explicit or implied) that the purchaser or reader will achieve success with women, or in any other endeavor for which they may be used.
Ross:
Welcome to my special live video broadcast, From Buddy to Bedmate: How to Get Out of the Friend Zone and Into the F**K Zone in 30 Days or Less, using 10 totally stealthy, undetectable methods that dont rely on language patterns. I just want to set up a few expectations for this event. First of all, whether youre watching the live broadcast or the replay, please understand that these methods Im going to present dont require you to use language patterns. Bear in mind that I love language patterns. I have no problem with language patterns. They are still the central core of what I do. However, many of you have said to me over the years, Id like to start using Speed Seduction on some female friends, but Im afraid if I start changing my language, theyre not going to like it, theyre going to notice it, and its going to seem weird or different. I actually found that not to be the case. Since I do like to please my audience, Ive come up with this stuff. You are part of my laboratory. Some of what Im going to present to you will seem very counterintuitive, particularly Techniques 3 and 4. You will see that they do work. The other thing before we get into the actual 10 techniques is this. This depends on having a certain attitude. The attitude is basically, Lets have some fun. Try this stuff, and see what happens. If you come at this from a desperate attitude or an attitude or perspective that says, Ive got to make it work. Ive got to get the girl, then its going to significantly degrade the power of these things. De-crushing yourself is perhaps a subject for another 1
Ross Jeffries Speed Seduction From Buddy to Bedmate Transcript Copyright 2010, Ghita Services, Inc. All Rights Reserved. Website http://www.seduction.com
broadcast. Nonetheless, its really important that we approach this from the right frame of mind. Before we get to the slides, let me also say that from time to time, all of us have heard the terrible words, Lets just be friends. I know when I was in college, and then later after college, I had so many women and its not that I only wanted to f**k them. I really liked these girls, but no matter what I did, I was stuck in the friend zone. Women do tend to slot us men into certain categories. They will make up their minds. I dont believe they make up their minds in minutes. At least within a few days, theyre going to put you in a certain category. Once they put you into that category of the buddy, friend or big brother, its f**king hard to get out. Believe me. I have been there. I dont even want to go into my personal horror stories. Here we go with the instructional video module, From Buddy to Bedmate: Ten Easy Ways to Get Out of the Friend Zone and into the F**K Zone in 30 Days or Less. Lets get to Technique 1. I call Technique 1 angles. Its very important when youre spending time with a woman who has up until this moment thought of you as a friend that you present yourself at a certain angle. The ideal angle, whether youre walking, sitting or standing, is to be side by side with that woman. Youll notice that couples who are really, deeply into each other dont sit across from each other. I tend to observe couples now, just as a professional thing and for fun. I was out and I noticed a couple sitting across from each other, and the table separating them was at least 6 feet long. Theres no way 2
they could touch each other or lean into each other. I just saw it was a bad situation. Theyre clearly not into each other. Its really important as you get out of the friend zone that you begin to establish a different angle with that woman. Whether youre sitting, walking or standing, you want to be side by side as much as possible. Remember, with all of these techniques Im going to share with you, please dont call attention to it. Dont say, Do you notice were sitting side by side? That ruins the whole thing. This is something they pick up on unconsciously. Its a sub-communication, not something you want to talk about. I hope thats evident and you guys understand that. If you cannot sit side by side, then at the very least, sit at a 45degree angle so youre diagonal to her. All you have to do is turn your head and see her, and she can turn her head a little bit and see you. The principle here is that people tend to feel emotionally about others based on the way their bodies relate. This is a pretty simple idea. Of these 10 techniques, some of them youre going to do once in awhile, some youre going to do frequently, some youre going to do once, and some youre going to do all the time. Pretty much, you can start doing the angles thing all the time. If she calls attention to it and says, What are you doing? Why are you sitting that way? or whatever, just say, I like to people watch. Ive just decided that Im going to do more people watching, and its
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more fun to people watch side by side than it is across from each other. We can see the people much more easily. Angles are very important. You can add into this. If, for example, you want to add in a little people watching to justify the sitting in angles or side by side, you can do that, too. One of the games Ive been playing lately is to sit side by side with a woman in a crowd and to pick out people. The game I now play is Whats His Line. Ill point out a guy say, Whats his line? What do you think his favorite chat-up line is? I know. Then, Ill lift her hair and whisper in her ear, If I told you that you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me? Ill just share corny lines, and then Ill pick out a girl and say, Whats her excuse? What do you think her favorite excuse is for cancelling a date? I think its, Ive got to wash my hair. Now youre sitting side by side and playing a little game, making fun of other people. If you can add in that little game to the angles when youre sitting side by side, it makes it even better. Technique 2 is the relaxed lean. Theres been so much said in the seduction community about this concept of Kino. You want to get kinesthetic with girls. Thats all good. Im all in favor of it. I like that. The thing is that theres a unique thing in beginning to test the waters with how she responds to being touched. Here it is. I say lean your body into hers when youre standing or sitting side by side. The key element here is to relax your body. Theres something in the social contract that says its okay to lean up against a stranger if youre in a crowded subway or some 4
crowded area where you cant avoid it, but youre not allowed to relax your body. If youre on a subway, train, bus or whatever it is, youre really crowded, and you cant avoid touching the other person, thats okay. The unwritten social contract says that you have to keep your body tense. The minute you relax your body and muscles against the other person, that means youre enjoying the contact. What I would instruct you to do is lean into the girl, but stay relaxed. Relax your body and lean into her for maybe a count of five, six or seven. See how she responds to that, and then take it away. This is one of the techniques youre not going to do all the time. Youre just going to test it. If she leans back in a relaxed way into you, thats good. Stay there for about 20 seconds, and then pull it away. Again, dont call attention to it. If you call attention to any of these techniques and say, Wow, isnt that cool? Were leaning into each other, then youre going to be f**ked. Dont do that. Heres Technique 3. This technique and the next one are counterintuitive. They rely on creating a little bit of discomfort. I know thats not something I would normally teach or something you would normally think of, but youll see its important. Weve all had the situation with women weve had crushes on and women we really want to impress where theres an uncomfortable silence. We are so eager to fill that gap. Were so eager to be witty, entertaining and invested in making sure this conversation really goes somewhere that were the ones to break that silence.
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What I would like you to do is, not deliberately create a silence, but when the invariable silence comes about as it will, rather than thinking of something to say, just sit there and be perfectly fine with nothing being said by you. Here are the reasons why this is powerful. Reason 1 is that it breaks the pattern, so she begins to see you in a different way. Reason 2 is that it may make her think youre actually a little bit bored with her. Reason 3 is that it may make her feel judged. All of these may cause her to reassess her take-it-or-leave-it attitude toward you. Even more importantly, Ill get to something else. The person who breaks the silence is really showing that theyre the most eager to keep the conversation going. Its a way of getting her to invest in the interaction with you by moving away from her discomfort. Its very counterintuitive. I would only do this once or twice during the period of time when youre going to be working your plan to turn her into your bedmate. Technique 4 is uncomfortable eye contact. Again, we all have those moments, and this is part of the silence too, where the eye contact is held and one of you looks away. When you look away first, you sub-communicate subordination and submission. This is important, especially in the context of being in the friend zone. When were in the friend zone, almost invariably, were doing everything for that girl. Were so eager to please her. Were overgenerous, we buy too many gifts, and we give her too much validation or contact.
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The thing is that with many women, particularly younger women, if youre very generous, kind, loving and giving and if theyre not already hot for you, they will unconsciously interpret that as you being subordinate or submissive to them, and that will kill the attraction. If shes already hot and bothered for you, thats fine. If shes not hot and bothered for you, and youre being kind, loving and generous, which well get to because you want to cut back on that too, youll communicate that youre subordinate. You need to be able to hold her eyes and let her be the one to break eye contact. The one who breaks eye contact is the one whos showing submission. This is really important. Again, use it sparingly, maybe once or twice. Heres a really good one. Technique 5 is having a neutral topic, but a sexual tone and vibe. I dont want you to directly sexualize the conversation yet. I dont want you to start bringing up sexual topics. Some of you have managed to do this. Some of you have used quotes and gotten a female friend into bed. That works. You can tell a dirty joke or quote what a friend said that a guy said to her. Remember, part of this is premised on the fact that were not going to be using language patterns as we do this. The way that would work is that you would talk about a neutral topic, like the train station or the subway, but you put a little bit of sexual tone into it. Youd say, It very interesting. I was looking at the train schedules the other day, and then go back to a regular tone of voice. Put in a sexual tone and vibe with a neutral topic. 7
Technique 6 is dominant, leading touch. Ill tell you a story about this one. My nephew, Gideon said this. This was a few years back before he started dating his now ex-girlfriend, who is a smoking hot girl. Theyd been hanging out for a while, and he said, Uncle, I know Tina likes me, but I just cant get out of the friend zone. What can I do? I dont want to do language patterns because she knows what you do for a living. Im afraid of getting caught. What do I do? I said, With a girl like Tina, you have to be a little bit more dominant and you have to do it subtly. Heres what you do. The next time youre out with her doing anything, just take her under the arm very lightly and just move her on the dance floor or somewhere, very subtly or slightly. Thats what I want you to do. He did that. The very next day, he got an email from her saying, Theres something subtly more commanding about you. I like it. The next night, they were f**king. Use a slight, dominant, leading touch. When I get back on the air and show the video, Im going to show you what that looks like. Technique 7 is a really clever technique. It takes some time to explain, so bear with me. I call this the double-blind random ignore. Remember, one of the things here is the pattern interrupt. We want to interrupt the pattern of expectations that you set with this girl. You want to do it truly randomly so even you yourself dont know when its going to occur. Heres how this is going to work. Youre going to get a pair of dice. Every time she calls or texts you, up until the time you f**k, instead 8
of calling or texting her back right away, which is what I know youve been doing if youre in the friend zone, youre going to roll the dice. If you roll a hard 12, eight or 10, youre going to wait 24 hours to return that call or text. What does that mean? A hard 12 means you get two sixes. A hard eight means you get two fours. A hard 10 means you get two fives. Once youre f**king, thats a different story. What makes this work is that even you dont know when youre going to do it or not do it. It makes it truly random, and thats where the magic takes place. If you want to play super hardball here, you can play hardball with this. Lets get to the hardball. If you really want to play hardball with this, youre going to flake or cancel on a meeting. I only want you to do this once. If you actually have a meeting set up with her, youre going to roll the dice, and youre going to cancel on the hard eight, 12 or 10. Never do it more than once. What makes this work is the truly random element of this, where its not just random from her perspective. Its random from yours. Theres a magic in that. Its a surrendering of control on your part. Technique 8 is the back-of-the-neck erotic touch. Only do this once every seven to 10 days, unless she asks for more. Im going to now show you a video of how that works. [Begin video]
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Ross:
By the way, guys, here are some touch tips. Take a deep breath. Right back here. It feels good doesnt it? Ill show you something. If youre touching with your fingertips, youre doing it wrong. Thats like what the barber does to get your hair out of the way. When you were a kid, did you ever go to the barber? When I was a kid, we had a barber. Did you have the barber poles here in England? We went and had this old time barber, whod tie on the thing, do this, pull and cut. You dont want to do that. Use the flat of the palm. Are you ready? She liked that. I didnt even have to do it. It feels good, doesnt it? I can rub the back of my own neck because its an anchor now. The palm of the hand goes here.
Participant: Ross:
Can you turn around? Yes, I will, but wait. Just like this. It feels good, doesnt it? Am I touching hard?
Participant: Ross:
No, not at all. Im barely touching at all. Its very soft. There are energy centers in the palm of the hand. I happen to believe this. Whether you believe it or not, act as if its true. Do you mind turning this way? Turn sideways. Sit down. Honey, Im sorry to treat you like Im grooming you. Theres the back of her neck. Im touching here with the flat of my palm like this, very lightly. Im not putting a lot of force or pressure. Heres what Ill do. I dont want to move you around like youre chattel. Sit like that. Lets say Im having some coffee with her. 10
[End video] Ross: [Begin video] Ross: Those are nice shoes. What are they, 4-inch heels? Theyre shiny. Dont wear a miniskirt. Have you got mirrors on your shoes? Because I can see myself in your pants, ba-dum-bah. Thats a bad Groucho line. Im sorry. If we were having coffee and I was talking to her, I would get up to go to the bathroom. When I get up to go to the bathroom, I would say, Ill be right back. [End video] Ross: There you go. Technique 9 is get mad and express anger. I have to say a few things. This has to be justified. Dont make up a reason to be angry. Chances are that shes going to do something to piss you off or violate your rules. You probably get a lot of this pent up. It has to be justified. You have to make it a quick outburst with no profanity or name-calling. If you say, You f**king whore. Ill kick your teeth in. F**K you, thats wrong. The right way is to stay grounded in your feet and say, Dont ever talk to me that way again. Technique 10 is date other women. Its really crucial that you get your mind off of her. The whole thing that were going to be doing here has to be subtle and unhurried. Start dating other women. I got her really hot. She was steaming.
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Theres more here. How are we going to see the signs that this is working? Shes going to start giving you the signals. Shell be calling you more frequently. You may begin to see her sexualize the conversation. She may talk about how she wants to f**k or how shes missing being touched. She may even ask you to touch her more behind the neck the way you did before. You will find her beginning to sexualize the vibe. Shell lean into you and relax her body into you. Youll feel the warmth coming off her body. The other thing you do is count the touches. When youre sitting with her, count the number of times she touches you in an hour. Women touch guys who they really like. If she cant keep her hands off you, thats a really good sign. You also want to look for what I call the eye scan. If a woman is really into you, what shell do is look in one eye, then the other eye. Shell look from eye to eye, to the lips, to the eye, to the eye and to the lips. Thats what I call the eye scan. When she starts giving you the eye scan, thats when you want to pull here into you. Just put your hand behind her neck, which youve already established through that dominant touch. The dominant touch is to take her by the arm and move her like that. Pull her to you and kiss her. Then you want to pull back and say, That was a mistake. We shouldnt be doing this. Then lean into her. Pull her into you again, kiss her and say, That was totally wrong, and then keep going.
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I actually learned this from a female friend. I didnt know she had a crush on me. We were both out one night. She was a little drunk. We were waiting for a cab. When the cab was pulling up, she just pulled me to her and started macking on me really hard. Then she said, That was wrong. Then we got in the cab and she jumped me again and was grabbing my cock and making out with me. She said, No, this is a mistake. We shouldnt be doing this. Then she went right back to it. I just take what I learned from females. Theyre the best people to learn this from. Let me go through some troubleshooting now with all of this. Here are some of the things you have to stop doing. I told you 10 things to do. Let me tell you some of the things you absolutely have to stop doing to get out of the friend zone. The first thing is no more gifts or presents. If youve been spending money on this girl, youve got to stop. No more dinners, movies or presents. Stop it cold. If she asks you why or brings it up, then you know youve got a little bit of a gold digger. Just say, Im feeling money is a little tight right now. I really want to invest in my education, business or whatever it is. Say, The government just hit me with some back taxes. I really have to back off the spending right now. Also, cut back on the validation. Please hear this. I want to tell you guys that validation is any contact you make or any attention you give her through any format, whether its a text message, Facebook, email, a phone call, or dropping by her house. All of that
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constitutes validation and attention. Youre going to have to radically cut back on that, particularly on initiating it. Also, give no more compliments. That doesnt mean you cant enjoy her, but no more compliments or spending money. If you cut your initiation of contact by any format, cut it down to one-third of what it is. If youre contacting her 10 times a week, which is way too much, cut it down to three times a week. This is very important that you really get out of your own way. The other thing is that if she starts talking about other guys, you no longer want to get involved with that or buy into it. If she starts talking about another guy and says, What do you think I should do? blow it off. Say something like, You know what? It seems to me like youve really got this under control already. Im sure youll figure out what to do. Change the subject. Do not give her any advice about any other guys. You especially want to watch the validating, the gift giving, and being stuck in the role of an advisor. Heres what to do if she asks you about something else going on in her life that doesnt involve guys, and you really feel that you want to share something. Lets say she suddenly tells you that her sister has been diagnosed with lung cancer. You dont want to say to her, Sorry, babe. I dont talk heavy subjects. What I would say is, I really dont give advice to people anymore, but I can share a life experience with you. Frame it as sharing a life experience rather than giving advice. Theres one
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thing Ive learned. Women do not f**k guys who give them advice. They will f**k guys who share a life experience. That is the essence of this broadcast right there. Ive made it compact and quick so we can now turn around and have a discussion about it.
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