Chapter 1

S he watched as the swans drifted lazily across

the still water. In the darkness the lake seemed
black and formidable, yet she felt safe and pro-
tected there. That must be why she returned so
often to this secret place.
She brushed her fingertips gently across the
water’s surface; her reflection disappeared for just
a moment. When the water grew still again she saw
someone in the reflection behind her. She smiled.
Although she was not certain who this person was,
she knew the image was someone special to her.
She turned and looked into the gentle eyes. The
women with the soft, sparkling blue eyes spoke
to her, but this time in an urgent manner, trying
desperately for her to understand. She strained to
hear, listened intently, but she just couldn’t make
out the words. She looked away for just a moment,
glancing at the dark forest across the lake. She
wondered vaguely where the swans had gone.
When she returned her gaze, the kind old woman
with the sapphire blue eyes had vanished.
It was still dark when Lauren stirred from her
dream. The little room that she slept in was blue,

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as if a little boy had lived there before her. The

furniture was old and mismatched. There was a
nightstand, an old twin bed, and a dresser on
the other side of the room topped with a wob-
bly lamp. The old tattered carpet smelled of dirty
socks that made her lip curl and her nose wrinkle,
which is why she always kept her window open.
She rubbed her cheek with the back of her hand
as her beautiful chocolate brown eyes fluttered
open. She lay there for a moment trying to clear
her head.
Lauren was slender for her age and much tall-
er than the other fourteen-year-old girls she knew.
She had the most striking honey brown hair that
hung to her waist in a thick mane that she kept
pulled back in a headband. She had a laugh that
was infectious, which made everyone around her
laugh too. But it had been a long time since she
had laughed like that. As she opened her eyes she
wondered why she had dreamt the same dream
yet again. She tried to remember what the dream
was about, but like all dreams, the harder she tried
to remember, the more it slipped away.
The part she could remember was of a kindly
old woman who seemed almost like…well, like
a grandma. She had held Lauren’s hand as she
spoke. There was a sense of urgency in her man-
ner. It was frustrating to Lauren that she couldn’t
make out what she was saying. As the dream
melted away the only thing she remembered—
the only thing she ever remembered—was the
kind old grandma.

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She rolled over and pulled the thin, threadbare

blanket close to her chin. Of all the dreams she’d
had, this one touched her spirit in the most pro-
found way. This dream seemed to tug at the deep
recesses of her soul. There was a yearning that
made her heartsick. She couldn’t explain it, even
to herself, but she wished beyond all measure that
the grandma in her dreams was real. Maybe if
she tried she could slip back into her dream. She
closed her eyes and willed herself to sleep.
It was cold in her room and Lauren shivered.
The darkness was fading and light began to creep
into her window. It was no use, the dream was
gone. As she lay there she began thinking about
things. Is this where she belonged? Is this where
she would always be? The thought made her
heart ache. She quickly brushed that notion out of
her mind. She heard someone stir in another part
of the house. Her foster parents were awake and
starting their day. It was time for her to get up too.
She pushed the dream out of her mind and
climbed out of bed. As she got ready for school
she remembered that she had a vocabulary test
today. “Phooey!” she muttered under her breath.
She’d forgotten to study. Well, she would just have
to study a bit on the bus.
Now what to wear? She mindlessly picked
through clothes in the dresser drawers when she
heard a voice in her head say, “You’re as beau-
tiful on the inside as you are on the outside, my
dear.” Startled, she stopped what she was doing
and stared blankly into space. Someone used to

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say that to her. She knew it, but whom? She was
concentrating so hard that she didn’t hear the
tap on the door. Lauren jumped when she heard
her foster mother’s voice say, “Time to get up,
Lauren.”
On a grassy knoll under dappled moonlight
stood an elegant estate. The grounds were lush
and well kept with mature trees and shrubs. In the
middle sat a most majestic mansion, which, de-
spite the size, seemed warm and inviting. It looked
very much like an old English estate in the shape
of an “H” that created an east wing and a west
wing with an area in the middle large enough to
host grand balls. There were two floors, an attic,
and a basement. To one side of the mansion the
swans drifted lazily across a calm lake. The weep-
ing willow trees’ long branches dipped softly into
the water from the bank, while the reeds of the
cattails rattled quietly in the gentle night breeze.
On the other side of the stately mansion sat a
forest thick with ancient trees. The forest was just
the sort of place young children would spend
countless hours investigating. The ground beneath
the trees was damp and covered with moss that
smelled of rich, loamy earth.
In the mansion, a second-floor window stood
open. A kind old woman awoke slowly from her
dreams feeling heartsick and disappointed. She
walked to the window and sighed. A shaft of
moonlight cut through the darkness, illuminating a
single tear on her cheek…

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Lauren waited until everyone else was off the

school bus before she got off herself. She walked
slowly behind all the other kids. One of the boys
holding a worm was chasing a squealing young
girl. Lauren smiled. She was satisfied with the B+
she’d gotten on her test today considering she’d
crammed for the test on the bus that morning.
Although summer vacation had ended just weeks
earlier, the leaves had already begun to change
color and there seemed to be a chill creeping
into the afternoon air. She buttoned her sweater
and walked slowly until the other kids were far
enough ahead of her that she didn’t run the risk
of having to walk home with them. It wasn’t that
they were mean to her; on the contrary, they had
tried to include her. But Lauren never felt com-
fortable. She couldn’t shake the feeling that she
didn’t belong. She thought about the dream and
the kind grandma trying to tell her something. Her
heart ached all over again. What she would give
to have someone so kind and gentle to be hers,
to comfort her when she was down or to hold her
when she cried. Someone that loved her, wanted
her, cared for her.
She was so lost in her thoughts that she didn’t
realize she’d already made it home to the shabby
little house with the weeds overtaking the front
yard. She walked through the front door and
made a quick detour to the kitchen to grab some
milk and cookies before heading to her room.
She wasn’t sure where her foster mom was, but
she heard what sounded like the television in the

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front room. Initially when she had arrived from so-

cial services Lauren tried to spend time with her
foster mother, following her from room to room. It
soon became apparent that any attempt at cre-
ating a bonding, lasting relationship was pointless.
Lauren realized that the only thing her foster moth-
er expected from her was to eat dinner there and
sleep there. Kindness and compassion played no
role in this home. So, with a package of cookies
and large glass of milk in hand, Lauren went to her
bedroom and unloaded the library books she’d
checked out earlier that day. She climbed onto
the bed, opened the top book, and nestled in for
the afternoon.
That night, as Lauren slept, she found herself
strolling through the most beautiful garden she
had ever seen. She cupped a rose in her hand and
smelled the sweet, spicy fragrance. She strolled a
bit farther breathing in the heady scent of lilac.
She was startled at how much it filled her with such
a sense of peace and happiness. As moonlight
drifted down in dappled bits, she caught a flicker
of movement near the honeysuckle. She searched
but saw nothing but a few branches gently sway-
ing. “It must have been the wind,” she mumbled
to herself.
Just then she felt the softness of her cotton night-
gown brush against her shin. I must be dreaming,
she thought. But it feels so real. She continued on
blissfully, stopping to smell flowers along the way.
As she made her way through an archway cov-
ered with star jasmine she saw someone sitting on

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a bench. It was the woman she had seen so many

times in her dream.
The woman smiled at Lauren and said in a
quiet voice, “I’m so glad you’re here, my dear.”
She stood and took Lauren’s hands in hers. “I have
been here every night since we last met, hoping to
see you again. I knew you would return, you clever
girl. I don’t know how much time we have so you
must listen to me carefully.” Her voice sounded
urgent. “I have been tirelessly searching for you
since you went missing. I knew you’d come home,
if only in your dreams. Your memory must be com-
promised or you would have activated the tracer
beacon in your wrist long ago. Here is what I need
you to do: when you wake you must search the
inside of your left wrist for something that feels like
a little grain of rice.” She took Lauren’s hand and
pointed to a spot under her wrist. “When you find
it, press it until you hear a slight cracking noise.
Once the tracer is activated I shall be able to find
you. Can you do that?”
“I’ll try, but who are you?” asked Lauren,
confused.
“I’m your Grandma Aggie, dear. I love you
so very much and have missed you beyond all
reason. Now do as I say and I’ll explain every-
thing once you’re home.” With that Aggie pulled
Lauren into the warmest hug she had ever felt. All
of Lauren’s fears faded away, and she felt loved
for the first time in months.
Lauren’s heart raced. She had so many ques-
tions that she wanted to ask. She pulled back to

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speak, but the dream had begun to weaken.

“No!” Lauren cried. She began grasping aimlessly,
but the image of Aggie had grown so faint that
she could hardly see her. “Oh no! Please wait…
PLEASE!” Lauren cried. But Aggie had now van-
ished completely. The garden was gone, her little
blue room reappeared, the dream had come
to an end, and Lauren sobbed quietly as she fell
back to sleep.