YELLOW FEVER'S FINGER ON LOCAL FOOTBALL'S PULSE

Edition Nine
EXTRA LONG
BIG BULGING
WEEKEND
SPECIAL EDITION
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 All Whites in Aussie Park Life has spies everywhere-
Like a Capital 3 game between Lower Hutt and Kapiti Coast United, last
years pre-world Cup ‘friendly’ between the All Whites and the Socceroos
including Queensland
was anything but friendly. Mostly they are useless layabouts, but sometimes they stumble on a gem
of a story, and this one is a cracker.
With Vince Grella, Tim Cahill and Marco Bresciano all pulling out stunts
that wouldn’t have looked out of place at a Roller Derby the Socceroos
Miron Bleiberg, the Israeli big-mouth in charge of A-League outfit Gold
hardly showered themselves with honour. They did however win.
Coast United, is known for not being shy. He speaks his mind, and isn’t
Monday 5th June sees the chance for revenge and although Tim Cahill is afraid to give anyone a spray. Most recently he and Ricki Herbert gave it
out the rest of the criminals are likely for a call-up and without a World to each other on the sidelines at Westpac Stadium.
Cup for them to kick our players out of it might just be the chance for
revenge. Of course captain fantastic Ryan Nelsen and Tommy Smith But it’s giving a different kind of spray that Miron’s in trouble for now. He
will be out – it is a friendly after all – along with Phoenix favourites Leo
turned up to a Brisbane Strikers game in the local Queensland Premier
Bertos and Tony Lochhead - and no-longer favourite Marco Rojas listed
as ‘questionable’ - but with Mark Schwarzer showing form recently League. Leaving the ground, he felt the call of nature, and took a quick
reminiscent of a Wellington United 2nd team keeper anyone could score. wazz in the carpark. That didn’t impress passing police very much. They
gave him a ticket for his trouble.
While Australia will have eyes on a game against Serbia two days later,
the All Whites have been together for a week having played Mexico on We all knew that Gold Coast United were pretty much pissing into the
Thursday. This could be the best chance in a while (well, since last year)
wind, but this takes it to new levels.
to get a win over the mortal enemy.

Meanwhile the White Noise boys are lining up behind them as always.
The core of White Noise are off for a couple of days of outlet shopping,
casual (not binge) drinking and State League football in Melbourne
followed by a jaunt to the City of Churches. Our match day base in
Adelaide will be the British Hotel in North Adelaide. The nice people there
have lined us up a pack of sale prices on tap beer and cider as well as
attractively priced eats and we’re a short walk through tree-lined streets
and parkland to the Adelaide Oval.

Check it out here: http://www.britishhotel.com.au/

If you can’t get there, the lads at the Four Kings (less Matty who will be in
Adelaide) will welcome you with open arms (and bars) and make you feel
like it will be All White on the night. Take your back page of Park Life Four
Kings voucher along and get a little something from them as well.

Meanwhile Parky’s people will skip brushing up on what the German is

for ‘I’ll have two bottles of your cheapest Shiraz’ in the Barossa Valley
and instead be at the coalface of local football around the grounds of
Wellington looking for next weeks cover story.

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 BIG CUP MONDAY! WE’RE JUST A
Parky is a massive fan of the Chatham Cup. And there is nothing SMALL CREATIVE AGENCY
better than celebrating the queen by getting out and watching coalface
football. It’s what Nana Liz would have wanted. So here are the eight
BUT WE CAN DO A LOT OF
games happening at a field near you.
REALLY COOL THINGS
TWO CENTRAL LEAGUE CLASHES
Both Napier City Rover and Miramar received byes through to round 2, GRAPHIC DESIGN
however Parky doesn’t quite understand how the holders enter the comp a
TV COMMERCIALS
full round before five North Region teams. Someone needs a Lower Hutt like
upper cut for that decision. These two teams played out a 0-0 draw back on DIGITAL MEDIA
May Day (May 1st for those Tory’s out there) up in Napier in Central League THOSE SORTS
action. The Mar should head into this as luke warm favourites after being
unbeaten in 9 games, while Napier is heading towards mid-table mediocrity.
OF THINGS
2-1 to the Miramafia after extra time.
e: info@neonmammals.com
Undoubtly the game of the round sees two Central League team duke in out w: www.neonmammals.com
at Bell Park (evitable transferred to Fraser Park). Lower Hutt were rewarded
with consecutive Central league opponents after they schooled West 3-0
in a fiery first round encounter. Koach Keinzley had a slightly easier task of
dispatching Wainuiomata 5-1. With both team in the top half of the Big Travel
league, this should be a cracker. Wairarapa to edge it 2-1 and Jake Theorn to
throw a tanty after being subbed.

The first of two Wellington derbies sees Upper Hutt host lynn of Tawa. Upper
Hutt saw of a poor Karori side (Hi Porteous) in round one, and have been
struggling for form since Wayne Rooker and Dion Bartosh headed overseas
for work. Tawa have been tagged with the giant killing label after they beat
Wairapapa and Olympic, and drew with Miramar, however their inconsistent
form was highlighted after they only just sneaked past North Wellington in
extra time in round one. This one could go to penalties. Makeshift keeper
Karl Romijn to save two penalties to help Tawa to a 4-2 penalty win (1-1 after
extra time).

Parky is the finger on the pulse of local football, however, even he has
no clue about Red Sox and Taradale. Red Sox are currently second in
Western Premiership, while Taradale seem to have a team in both the
Western (currently 4th) and Pacific Premiership (currently 2nd) , further
highlighting the Mickey Mouse nature of Central Football. Not that

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 BIG CUP MONDAY!
anyone probably cares, but Red Sox to sweep aside Taradale 3-1
(google broom sticks and Taradale to get that reference).

In what is almost certainly another one sided affair, Stop Out host
Ingelwood. Like NP Rangers, Ingelwood are in the 3rd tier of Central
Football, and have chalked up 3 wins from their first 8 games. After a
slow start, Stop Out are in a mini resurgence in Capital Premier and put 7
past a helpless Stokes Valley in round one. Inglewood will leave the Hutt
with nothing but a stinging sensation when they pee. Expect at a 5 goal
winning margin in this one.

Big travel for Petone in Big Cup

Petone head north to Taranaki this Queen’s Birthday weekend to take
on top of the table Taranaki premier league side New Plymouth Rangers
(NPR) at Merrilands Domain. Most will be expecting a walk in the park for
the big travel league team, however the smooth talking and high rolling
NPR owner Mickey Abramovich, a local celebrity and oil & gas tycoon will
be thinking otherwise after securing the services of a barrel load of last
season’s Team Taranaki players to join the ‘gers.

Notable signings include Nathan Hill, who is preparing for a trial with
an S-league club, Jared Macelhannan, Greg Clark, James Grieve, B Rad
Hickling and an unnamed Argentinean oil rig worker with very, very
greasy hair. The inside word is the Argentinian will make Petone spill
more ball than a BP well spilling oil into the Gulf of Mexico.

Home advantage and a greasy surface could cause Petone to slip, look for
an upset.

Two Worlds Collide

Wellington United Argentina travel all the way from Buenos Aires to
Palmerston North on Monday to take on the mightily monikered North
End AFC 1sts M B Cranes & Engineering.

If nothing else, this will be a chance for Palmerston Northites to see some
football. Wellington United are flying in Capital Premier, and while we
like poking fun at G Little’s boots and Ken Allen’s life there is no denying
that they area super side in top form. Emiliano Tado is one of the talents

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 BIG CUP MONDAY!
of Wellington football and last weekend Park Life watched him toy with
Wests ressies. He even lobbed the keeper from the edge of the box for fun.

North End by contrast sit mid table in a league that is being comfortably
won by schoolboys. Expect a mismatch of mighty proportions.

Still in Palmy, but across town, Island Bay United, complete with new
transfer Corey Mills (cousin of professional angry man and bobsledder
Davie Rutherford) will get a true test of their league promotion chances
when they take on Central League cellar dwellers Palmy North Marist.
The Pope’s Own Marist are clear last in the Central League, and really are
woeful, so don’t expect much.

ASB CHATHAM CUP Draw

Palmerston Nth End vs Wellington United Skoglund Park, 2pm
Palm Nth Marist vs Island Bay Utd Memorial Park, 2pm
Napier City Rovers vs Miramar Rangers Park Island, 2pm
New Plymouth Rangers vs Petone Merrilands Domain, 2pm
Upper Hutt City vs Tawa Harcourt 1, 2pm
Red Sox Manawatu vs Taradale Skoglund Park, 2pm Four Kings
Stop Out vs Inglewood
Lower Hutt City vs Wairarapa Utd
Hutt Park 1, 2pm
Bell Park, 2pm
Saturday June 11th
7.30pm kick off
Super Saturday for Cap Premier
Ignoring Central League for a minute, this Saturday could have a major
impact on who finishes where in Capital Premier.

Top takes on bottom as Island Bay host the Nui. Wainui have struggled On Easter weekend Dave Capstick,
since promotion and things don’t get any easier for them. The Sharks are football lover and self employed
in great form and have shrugged off last year’s struggles to emerge as builder, suffered a fractured skull
genuine title contenders this year. Any point here would be a great one for in a horrific head clash with his
Wainui, while the Bay could extend their lead at the top of the table to 5
points over some of the trailing pack of three. Karori team mate.
Join us in this fundraiser event to
The Sharks will be hoping for a draw or a Stop Out win in the game of the
round - Upper Hutt City vs Stop Out. Stop Out have quietly gone on a run
help make Cappy’s road to recovery
that little bit easier. All proceeds
in recent weeks that has lifted them to within 4 points of first place. Upper
to the Cappy family.
Supported by
$25 per head gives you a pint,
some snacks and the funny money
for the casino.
Great prizes to win and a
stack of raffles.
200 tickets only.
For tickets or contribution
enquiries email
mike.greene@paradise.net.nz

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 BIG CUP MONDAY!
Hutt in contrast have hit a bit of a flat spot, giving up points to Waterside
Karori last weekend that would have had them outright leaders.

Wharfies will be looking to carry on their non-losing streak, but will have
a tough task as they visit former coach Shaun Gill at Miramar Rangers.
Three points for Wharfies could lift them to the safety of 10 points, and
clear of Marist who will certainly lose to Wellington United. It won’t be
easy though, with Rangers a strong outfit.

Olympic have a day off, travelling to Wests for a formality match that
will earn them three easy points. Wests first team had three sent off last
week so there isn’t even the spectre of team stacking to worry about.
LOTTO MENS CENTRAL LEAGUE
Just wave em through. Maycenvale vs Tawa Hastings Sports Park, 2.30
Lower Hutt City vs Wairarapa Utd Bell Park, 2.30
PN Marist vs Petone Memorial Park, 2.45
Wharfies vs Petone in Big Cup Napier City Rovers vs Olympic Park Island, 2.30
(4 May 2002) Western Suburbs vs Miramar Rangers Endeavour 1, 2.30
Boh. Check dis. It is me, Ali G. Last weekend me and me boyz went to
chek a game hof football betweun da Karori massive and the Petone
massive at Karori Park – which is just like the John Nike Leisure Centre in
FOOTBALL CENTRAL PREMIER LEAGUE
Bracknell. Da game was for the Chatham Cup and me was keen to chek Olympic vs Western Suburbs Endeavour 2, 12.30
hout this Wharfies side that everyone has been banging on about. Hit Island Bay United vs Wainuiomata Petone 1, 2.30
was expected to be a close encounta. Upper Hutt City vs Stop Out Harcourt 1, 2.30
Miramar Rangers vs Waterside Karori David Farrington Park, 2.30
Now me mate Dave says that there is some well fit birds that watch Marist vs Wellington United Kilbirnie, 2.30
these games, but all I could see was a couple of mingers who seemed
to know Matt McGloughlan. Aye. Karori’s passin wuz well wicked in the
first harf, and dey took da lead in the 20th minute, when Trapper Rogan,
who happarently is well good at taking free kicks, scored a wicked one.

In the second harf Karori was playing well badly, and in the 70th minute
Jesse Phillips did a well rank mistake to give Petone a chance that me
Julie could have taken. The Petone striker took the ball off Phillips and e
shot da ball past da goal keepa.
Don’t forget to follow Park Life
Da game wuz a well close one, and in the 80th minute da Petone massive
struck again. Some rank defending by Karori, and quicker than a drive-
on Facebook and Twitter
by, the Petone striker finished of an easy chance. Greenie had a chance
We are @Park_Life on Twitter. And at facebook.com/parklifenz
to level the game in the last minute, but da shot went wide hof da goal
which was a bit racialist. Petone won da game 2-1.

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 VOUCHER

2 for 1
Pitcher Limit one per person
Valid until Tuesday 7th of June
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