First Aid Parenting

Jean & Shawn Boonstra
and Pacific Press Publishing Association

Design & Layout by Fred Knopper
Cover Photo by Photos.com
Edited by Michele Stotz
Proofread by Ashley Wagner
Text Typeset: 11 pt. ITC New Baskerville
Copyright 2008 by It Is Written. All Rights Reserved.
Additional copies of this book and a

host of other spiritual resources are available
from It Is Written. For more information call
toll free 1-888-664-5573 or visit
www.itiswritten.com
Unless otherwise noted, all Bible texts are from the

New King James Version, copyright 1979, 1980, 1982
by Thomas Nelson, Inc. Used by permission.
Printed in the United States of America

by Pacific Press Publishing Association
Nampa, Idaho / Oshawa, Ontario, Canada
www.pacificpress.com
ISBN 10: 0-8163-2169-8

ISBN 13: 978-0-8163-2169-8
❦
Contents
Introduction ........................................................................5
In an Emergency .................................................................7
When Should I See the Doctor?.......................................13
Fever ..................................................................................17
Fractures and Sprains .......................................................22
Isolation .............................................................................25
Underdosing on the Best Medicine .................................30
Preventive Medicine .........................................................35
Poisons ...............................................................................40
Inoculations.......................................................................46
Hypothermia .....................................................................51
The Great Physician ..........................................................55
Emergency Quick Reference Guide ................................59
Emergency Help from the Great Physician .....................60
❦
Introduction
It is with great trepidation that we begin this little

book, First Aid Parenting. We feel woefully inadequate to
write anything about parenting for many reasons! The
first reason is that we hardly feel we are model parents.
Just visit our house some busy school morning as we’re all
getting ready to dash out the door and you’ll see a brilliant
example of our shortcomings.
Secondly, we are not child psychologists. We are not
marriage and family counselors, or teachers or physicians.
We are just two people who love each other and our
children. We have muddled through our parenting
experience thus far, with the help of the Great Physician,
and if we have learned anything, we have learned solely
through trial and error.
The third reason that we have entered into this journey
cautiously is that our children are still young. It is far too
early to know if what we’ve been doing is actually going
to “take” over the long haul or not. Our two girls are only
eight and five, and so we still have many, many years ahead
of us to confirm just how little we know about parenting!
It is because of these precluding factors that what you
find before you is not an expert treatise on parenting. It is
not an exhaustive work, as you must certainly have already
guessed from its size. It is not a manual and it is definitely
not the final word on parenting. This having been said, if
you are willing to come on this parenting adventure with
us, we welcome you inside.
5
“For I know the plans
I have for you,”
declares the Lord,
“plans to prosper you
and not to harm you,
plans to give you hope
and a future.”
Jeremiah 29:11 (NIV)

❦
In an Emergency
Do you ever feel like your life as a parent is just about

surviving one emergency after another? In our household,
it seems like even the smallest things can turn into full-
scale emergencies—especially when lack of sleep is a
factor. Our youngest daughter, Naomi, has been known to
crumple into a heap of tears over a missing sock!
Our children are certainly a treasured gift from God.
We love them desperately, but that doesn’t mean that every
day is smooth and easy sailing. In spite of our love and
devotion to our children, it often feels like life is all about
whatever emergency is consuming the moment. In our
house, and likely in yours too, real emergencies are rare,
but perceived emergencies abound.
So, what do we do when we feel like we’re living
in a state of emergency? How is being a parent today
different from when our parents were raising us, or our
grandparents were raising them? In many ways, modern
parenting is essentially the same as it has always been.
There are things that are universally true of all parents,
of all generations. Many of the things that defined my
great grandmother as a mom are the very things that
define me.
Still, modern parenting is decidedly different than
it was for any generation before us. There are things I
encounter daily that were unheard of in my grandmother’s
or even my mom’s day. Let’s take a look at some of the
universals of parenting first, and try to determine if this
7
8 FIRST AID PARENTING
state of emergency parenting has always ruled, or if it is

something that our generation invented!
Parents, no matter the time or the place, have an
indelible influence on the life of their child. The decisions
we make as parents, and the way we treat our children, will
affect them for the rest of their lives. A parent is the first
person a child relies on, learns from, and trusts. The things
we teach our children will go with them for a lifetime.
The parental influence is difficult to understate. It is an
awesome responsibility and a very humbling experience! I
vividly remember the day I overheard our oldest daughter
Natalie, then two, talking to some of her dolls. She was
being sweet and kind and I loved listening to her. Then I
heard her snap to one of her little dolls, “Not right now.
I’m busy.” And I knew exactly who she was imitating…it
was me! It was terribly humbling. A parent’s influence over
his or her child, whether good or bad, is huge.
Parenting has always been hard work. The core
challenge is the same now as it always has been: kids are
born without an instruction manual, and it is our job
to figure things out on our own. Shawn and I waited
several years before we started our family, and so by the
time I was expecting our first daughter I was overflowing
with expectations and hopes for our little one. We had
everything all mapped out in our minds, and we thought
that we knew just how we were going to raise our new
arrival.
Then our vocal little bundle arrived and most of our
plans and ideas went right out the window! We suddenly
realized that we were going to have to learn how to be
parents, just like everyone before us, through a lot of
sanctified guesswork. We had no idea that our beautiful
little girl could possibly cry so much, and so loudly! We
struggled along, eventually learning what worked for
Natalie.
IN AN EMERGENCY 9
We were admittedly smug the second time around,

but learned very quickly that what worked with our first,
definitely did not work with our second! Parenting has
never been easy because we all start the job inexperienced,
and each child is a unique creation of God.
Many days, the fast paced state of emergency that
I find myself in does seem to be a product of modern
parenting. My life as a mom is somewhat different for me
than it was for my mom, and quite a lot different than it
was for my grandmother. Our modern life is busier, much
more cluttered with things and demands, and technology
has been both a blessing and a strain. Our world and our
homes have changed.
Shawn and I both grew up in small towns as younger
children and we can remember playing outside, with little
supervision, for long periods of time. Shawn remembers
his mother telling him to come home when the noontime
siren rang out for lunch. I remember my mom telling my
sister, brother and me to come inside when the streetlights
came on. These kinds of freedoms are fairly unusual
nowadays.
Even in our safe, family oriented neighborhood, I
wouldn’t think of letting my children play on their own
beyond the boundaries of our court. Our world is just
different. Kids are confined to backyards or the indoors,
where influences like satellite TV and the Internet were
nonexistent when we were young. Parents have to play a
larger supervisory role nowadays than ever before.
One of the biggest changes in modern parenting has
been the definition of roles for fathers and mothers. Single
parent families and mixed families are commonplace, too.
In our Western culture, the roles of fathers and mothers
were fairly static for many generations. The father earned
the living, cut the grass, fixed the stuff that was broken and
drove the car on family vacations. The mother took care
of the home, cooked the meals, did the laundry, was the
primary caregiver for the children and, most of the time,
went along for the ride. There have always been exceptions
to the rule in every generation, but the fact remains that
this was the norm up until my mom’s generation. The
average family has certainly changed from just a few
generations ago.
The traditional male/female division of labor is quite
different. In most families both parents work, even if one
of the parents is working from home or part-time. Even
in families where only one parent works, there still seems
to be a less traditional division of chores. In our family,
Shawn travels a lot and so by default I am the one who fixes
the broken stuff and cuts the grass.
When both parents are working and children’s lives are
more cluttered with materialistic wants and activities, the
combination is pretty hectic. I think about how different
my children’s lives are from mine, and I’m not that old!
A lot of this change has been positive, because both
parents now have more choices open to them than they
did a few generations ago. The changes in parental roles
have not all been positive, though, and that goes for both
moms and dads. The women of my mom’s generation
were encouraged to follow their hearts into the career
world or the domestic life. It was an exciting time where
many women felt, for the first time, that they could choose
their own destiny.
Much of this freedom to choose has now been lost
in my generation. Our society and economy are now
structured in such a way that it is almost impossible for
mothers not to work outside of the home. I know so many
friends that would rather be at home full-time, if only the
family could afford the loss of their income. So, we have
almost swung around full circle. This generation of moms
is bearing a tremendous amount of responsibility not only
IN AN EMERGENCY 11
in the business world, but on the home front as well.

Today’s dads are far different from their grandfathers.
Dads nowadays are increasingly involved in their children’s
lives, and that is a wonderful thing. Dads are still carrying
the bulk of the financial burden in most families, and they
are also helping out around the house more than ever.
These changes are wonderful, but I find it disappointing
that the role of the father in the family has lost the respect
that it once garnered. I am always saddened when I
see fathers ridiculed and disparaged on television and
in books. The dad seems to be the last fair target for
ridicule.
The modern father carries a lot of responsibility,
with little recognition or thanks. The father’s role has
become rather uncertain in our modern world, and this
is a tremendous shame, because his role is incredibly
important.
A father’s most lasting role is to show his children a
picture of what God, their Heavenly Father, is like. A father
shows his children that he is dependable and willing to
sacrifice of himself for his family, and that sometimes “no”
is the best answer! These are all things that show a child
what God is like. Ultimately, a father’s role is to lead his
children to God. This is the mother’s role also, and even
more so in a single parent family. We read about it in
Deuteronomy 6:6, 7 (NIV):
“These commandments that I give you today are to be upon

your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when
you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie
down and when you get up.”
This is a high calling, and one that deserves the utmost

in respect and love. It is a calling that keeps Shawn and me
humble every day.
Parenting in today’s world is certainly not business as

usual! We still love our children, work for our children and
learn from them—as parents always have. The fast paced
life that we live creates unique challenges and frequent
emergencies. Our challenge is how, with God’s help, to
survive the emergencies.
❦
When Should I See the Doctor?
Maybe, like me, you have rocked a sick toddler in your

arms and worried. You took her temperature and, yes, it
was high, but not too high. She has a cold and is sleepy
and cranky. Maybe it is an ear infection, or maybe it is just a
little bug that will soon pass. You give her Tylenol, rock her
a little more, and worry. Should I take her to the doctor? It
could be tonsillitis, but then again, it could just be a cold.
You go back and forth in your mind a few dozen times,
certain that whichever choice you make will somehow be
wrong. You worry, worry and worry! This kind of worrying
doesn’t just happen over illnesses, either. Worry seems
to be an inborn part of being a parent, and especially of
being a mother.
There are so many things to worry about when you are
a parent. The worry over a child with a terminal illness is
a genuine worry, but thankfully most parents do not carry
that burden. Most of our worries are over the day-to-day
things.
When Natalie arrived in this world, she surprised us
by arriving two weeks early! Shawn was on the other side
of the country and I was at home with his mom—who,
thankfully, was there to help me.
Natalie was a little on the scrawny side, due to her
early arrival, and our first worry became, is she eating
enough? Is she gaining enough weight? The burden of
that responsibility was tremendous in those early days.
Suddenly, we were responsible for another human life,
13
and a fragile little one at that. We never felt like we were

doing the right thing. I soon discovered that this was to
be the first of many worries, some legitimate, and others
definitely self-imposed.
There are so many things to worry about! When
children are little, it is so easy to worry about their growth
and development. Is my child growing enough? Is she
eating too little, or too much? Should I let him drink
juice or water, milk or soymilk? Does ketchup count as a
vegetable? Should I hand out candy at her birthday party,
or will the other parents turn up their noses at my liberality
with sweets? If I deny her treats, will she overindulge in
them later in life? Why isn’t she talking yet? Why won’t she
stop talking? Am I really up for this challenge of parenting?
I just don’t think that I can do it. I could go on and on.
I misguidedly dreamed that once the girls got older,
and a little more independent, that my job as a mom would
get easier. Wow, I was wrong! The worries are different,
but there are even more of them! Did I teach her enough
at home to prepare her for school? Private school, public
school or home school—did I make the right choice? Does
she have enough friends? Is she a strong leader, or too
bossy? Should she be learn-ing a sport and taking music
lessons, or will she be over-scheduled? Is she well adjusted?
Why are all the other kids in the class taller than she is?
The list is endless.
Our children haven’t even entered the teen years
yet, but we are already worried about them. With two
daughters, Shawn has already lain awake at night worrying
about the boys ringing the doorbell to take his girls out. I
can’t even imagine my babies going away to college.
Worry is such a natural part of being a parent. We love
the little beings in our care desperately and want only the
best for them. We want them to have the best of the things
that we enjoyed in our childhood, and all of the things that
WHEN SHOULD I SEE A DOCTOR? 15
our own childhood lacked. Worry seems to go hand in hand

with this. Worry has plagued many of my days and nights,
but I have found in recent years that there is a doctor with
a prescription for that—God, the Great Physician!
There is a verse in the Bible that has truly helped me
to turn my worries over to God and let Him take care of
them. This verse is in Jeremiah, and I have written it on the
back of an old photo of the girls that is tucked inside my
Bible. Jeremiah 29:11 (NIV) says:
“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord,
“plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope
and a future.”
This verse is a wonderful comfort to me. It reminds

me that ALL is in God’s care and in His hands. He is in
charge of all things. It also reminds me that He created
my children, and me, too, for a purpose. My life is not
something random. He planned for me to be the person
that I am, in spite of my bumps and flaws.
God also allowed for Shawn and me to be the parents
of these two children, and He must think that we are up
for the task, or He wouldn’t have entrusted them to our
care. God has a wonderful plan for our daughters’ futures,
and part of His plan was to have us raise them. I cling to
this promise in Jeremiah and the knowledge that He has a
plan for a hope and a future for our children and us.
There are many times when I come to the end of the
day and wonder just where things went haywire! The day
usually starts well enough, and intentions are good, and
then some little thing goes wrong and the whole day goes
sour after that.
It is on evenings like this that I love to sneak into the
girls’ bedrooms and kiss their soft cheeks while they are
asleep. Their peaceful, sleeping faces ease the pain of the
frustrations and mistakes of the day and remind me of the

precious gift that God has given me.
A great deal of my worry as a parent also stems from the
expectations that I have of myself, and my constant failure
to meet those expectations. I worry a great deal about what
I am doing to raise my children, and if I am making the
right decisions. I feel the heaviness of the responsibility
often, and it is then that this verse encourages me greatly.
We read in Romans 8:28 (KJV):
“And we know that all things work together for good to them
that love God, to them who are called according to his purpose.”
Worry may continue to plague us all from time to

time in our parenting experience, but it doesn’t need to
overwhelm us. We are all errant humans making our way
through our parenting experience as best as we know how.
There is one worry that we can lay to rest right now, and
that is when to see the doctor. Jesus, the Great Physician,
is on call 24/7 and He loves to hear our concerns, our
disappointments and our joys. All of them. He truly does
have the answers for all of our worries!
❦
Fever
Have you ever felt like you are constantly running a

temperature? I mean, life is so busy that it demands we live
it at a feverish pace—always rushing, feverishly, from one
task on our to-do list to the next. We rush through tasks
leaving them half finished, and then move feverishly on to
the next ones.
Our lives today are so busy that this fevered pitch
seems normal. There just isn’t enough time in the day to
get done what needs to get done. We all live this way, so
there mustn’t be any other choice in the matter, right? I
wish that I could say that my life was calm, cool and fully
under control on a daily basis, but it definitely is not. We
parents seem to be running a collective fever!
If you were to ask me, my friends with children, my
sister and my sisters-in-law what our biggest frustration is as
moms, I can almost guarantee that our answers would all
be the same: not enough time! The demands on a modern
parent’s time are tremendous and they are even bigger
than they were a generation or two ago. Most parents today
juggle childcare, household chores and career demands.
Our families are smaller than they were a hundred years
ago, we now have countless “time-saving devices,” and yet
we seem to spend even less time with our children than
ever before.
Modern technology can be a blessing and a curse. Our
family loves our Web camera and the ability it gives us to
talk “face to face” with grandparents and Shawn when he
17
is away from home. Technology can also be a time robber,

though. I can’t count the number of times that I’ve sat
down at my desk “just to check my e-mail,” and before I
know it an hour has vanished!
Each day is only 24 hours long, and life does go much
more smoothly when we sleep for eight of those 24 hours.
What can we do to keep our temperature down during the
remaining busy 16 hours? I am definitely not an expert
in this area, but I have worked diligently in recent years
to bring my temperature down, and here are a few of the
things that have worked for me.
First, it helps to realize that balancing the demands on
my time is not always going to work. It seems like everyone
is talking about time management and finding the balance
in life. This is a constant struggle, and it is also wrought with
somewhat unrealistic expectations from ourselves. Balance
is a fantastic goal because God certainly did not design us
to be completely focused on our work, our homes, or our
appearance at the expense of our children.
Thinking that you can live every day in perfect balance
is unrealistic. If you have a deadline looming at work, or
your taxes are still undone and it is April 14, then your
life will be unbalanced. Most of us cannot cook a gourmet
meal, exercise for 60 minutes, spring clean the house and
meet a pressing deadline all on the same day. Life, by
nature, is often temporarily unbalanced.
On the rare day that my home, work and family
duties all fall into place beautifully and peacefully, I feel
truly blessed. However, letting go of the goal of perfect
balance every day has helped me a lot. If your life is always
unbalanced, then it is time to reassess your priorities.
Allowing yourself to let go of the notion of perfect daily
balance will let you ignore the pile of dirty laundry in favor
of a spontaneous summer day at the beach. It will take
a lot of the heat off! One of the best things that I have
FEVER 19
done recently is to start saying “no” to others and to take

better charge of my schedule. I know that, like me, you’ve
probably heard it a hundred times before, but it really does
bring the temperature down a lot.
A few years ago, Shawn and I had the privilege of visiting
a poor country (I can’t tell you where because it is illegal to
preach there) to share the gospel and to help build several
churches. It was truly a life-changing experience, and while
there we were struck by how happy the children were! They
live in shacks and run around in bare feet, but all the while
they are smiling and content. I could not help but think
of how “cluttered” my own life, and our children’s lives
are. While there, I made a conscious decision to simplify
our lives. Often I have fallen short, but I try to get back on
track and stay focused.
There are always demands on our time, and people
will be unhappy when we say no, but saying no is just what
might be best for our children. Shawn and I have also
made a concerted effort to not let our children take on too
many activities. School, music lessons and church activities
are more than enough for their young lives. Saying no
is extremely difficult for me, but I have found that it is
getting easier!
Before our children were born I faithfully kept a
journal. I also kept a pregnancy journal through my first
pregnancy and thoroughly enjoyed it, but after Natalie was
born, my journaling became very sporadic. I managed to
keep a journal through my second pregnancy, but after
Naomi was born, I convinced myself that journaling was a
luxury that I did not have the time for anymore.
It wasn’t until just a few months ago that I began
journaling again and it has been a wonderful blessing to
me. It has been a welcome time of peace and serenity in
my feverish schedule. I am not as thorough as I once was,
but my journal is a place where I can express my thoughts,
fears, hopes and thanksgivings freely, and then bring them

to God in prayer. It is a wonderful blessing to be able to
flip back through the pages and enjoy again the blessings
that I recorded, and to see how God has been working in
my life by answering my requests and helping me solve my
problems.
The biggest time-related frustration I’ve faced is to find
time for my spiritual life. We began reading Bible stories
to our girls and having morning and evening worship with
them since before they could walk. It has always been a
very special family time, but there never seemed to be time
for me, alone, to read the Bible and pray. I tried many
different things in those early years of parenting. I tried
reading in the evening but, invariably, I would fall asleep,
Bible in hand. I tried getting up early and reading in the
morning. That worked fairly well for a while until our
youngest learned that if she got up early, too, she could
snuggle with mommy on the couch and ask her lots of
questions.
I always carried a great load of guilt over this until one
day a friend, also a pastor’s wife, whose children were now
grown, shared with me that she too had struggled when
her children were young. “It’s okay,” she reassured me, “I
think that God winks at young mothers because he knows
that there just isn’t time in the day!”
That eased a lot of my guilt, but I knew that I needed
my quiet time with God. I stopped thinking of it as
something on my to-do list that I had to get in before I
could move on to the next task, and began to think of it as
my time of renewal.
I always seemed to have the time to steal 10 minutes
to surf the Internet or catch one of my favorite cooking
shows on TV, so what if I spent just 10 short minutes a
day reading my Bible? I printed off a reading program for
reading the Bible in a year and told myself that I would
FEVER 21
follow the plan, but would take as much time as I needed.

Any time with God was better than none.
It has been a great source of strength and comfort
to me. I now feel so much better equipped to handle
my feverishly paced life. God always leads me to read
something that I need for that day, to help me at work or
with the children. It is the best fever reducer going!
❦
Fractures and Sprains
In spite of our greatest desires and best intentions,

no parent is perfect. Our relationships with our children
contain at least a few fractures and sprains. Unlike a
fractured collarbone or sprained ankle, fractures and
sprains in relationships with our kids can be fixed without
casts and slings.
I have made so many mistakes as a mom that I am
humbled daily. I have learned a lot about God, my
Redeemer, through my relationship with my children. My
children are amazingly quick to forgive, and their love for
their parents never falters in spite of our imperfections.
Our Heavenly Father is the same. He is always ready to
forgive us for our mistakes, no matter how grievous, and
His love is undying for His children.
I could fill volumes with a retelling of all of the mistakes
that I have made as a parent. Shawn and I both seem
to struggle with the same thing with our children—and
that is patience, or a lack thereof! Often, we have acted
too hastily with the girls when resolving disputes, or just
interacting with them.
This past summer, while on vacation, I was reminded
afresh about just how impatient I can sometimes be. We
had spent a long, hot day in the car and we were all tired
by the time we got into our hotel room. I was hurrying
the girls along into bed when a tussle broke out between
them. I don’t recall the details of the incident, but I do
remember hastily coming to the conclusion that Naomi
22
FRACTURES AND SPRAINS 23
must be the offender, and swiftly applying retribution for

the crime.
Naomi wailed and mournfully declared her innocence,
just as Shawn walked in the room. She pled to her daddy
for justice and, sure enough, she was right and I was wrong.
I felt terrible! A few sniffles later, though, I was gladly
forgiven and daddy made all well again by letting her eat a
Kit Kat in the bathtub to make up for mommy’s premature
judgment. By no means was this my finest hour as a parent,
but the fracture wasn’t permanent. My daughter forgave
me, and her daddy showed her a picture of what God is
like because He, too, is always on the side of truth.
In my journey as a parent I have learned so much
from God and His Word on how to heal the inevitable
fractures and sprains. I have learned so much about God
and His character. Most importantly, I have learned that
it is okay to apologize and say you are sorry. Our girls are
so incredibly willing and able to forgive our transgressions
that it humbles and amazes me. It is never an easy thing
to say you are sorry, but I am finding that it gets easier
when I realize just how much my daughters love me and
are willing to forgive. Some of our best talks come after an
open and willing apology from each of us. The walls then
come down and we can talk about whatever is behind the
incident that caused the problem in the first place.
In the Bible, God calls this willingness to apologize and
forgive repentance. Repentance is a genuine remorse for
wrongdoing and is accompanied by a strong desire to not
make the same mistake again. This does not mean that
we will never make the same mistake again, but it does
mean that our heart has turned away from the sin. This
repentance comes directly from God Himself. He wants us
to turn our back on sin, and He is longing for us to come
to Him and ask for His forgiveness, for He is willing and
able to grant it.
So, as a parent, what can we expect from God when

we make mistakes? I think it is important to realize that
when you are a parent you are “job-sharing” with God.
Our children are on loan from Him. He tells us to be the
teacher. He’ll be the coach and He will be tech support.
God is not just on our side—He is the coach! I wish that
this meant that I would never make a mistake with my
children again, but the Bible is clear that “all have sinned
and come short of the glory of God.”
As parents, we put unrealistic expectations on our-
selves. In other areas of our lives we freely accept that we
are not perfect, but yet somehow we feel that we should
be perfect parents. The reality is that those fractures and
sprains are going to keep happening. Hopefully we learn
from the mistakes and, with God’s help, the fractures
happen less often and heal quickly. Just as our precious
little ones are so willing to forgive, so is God. In 1 John 1:9
it says:
“If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us

our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.”
This is the best kind of healing, and it doesn’t require

so much as a bandage!
❦
Isolation
In our early years of ministry, Shawn and I lived and

worked in Northern British Columbia, at mile zero of the
Alaska Highway. The Northern Lights were magnificent
and our quiet drives to and from our three little churches
were special times. While we were working there, we met
a man who had lost one of his legs. He shared his story
with us. He had been snowmobiling in the bush one winter
when his snowmobile broke down. He was unable to fix
the machine and the temperature was at least 45 degrees
below zero Celsius.
Far away from any town, he had to assess his situation.
How soon would someone be by to ask for help? There
was no way of knowing. He waited, alone, in the subzero
weather for a little while, but quickly realized that if he
didn’t start walking to the nearest town, he would die from
the extreme cold. Alone, he began walking and after several
hours arrived at the town, exhausted and frostbitten. They
tried to save his leg, but eventually it had to be amputated.
The cold had damaged it beyond saving.
That story has stuck with me over the years. I admire
the courage it took for him to walk to safety. We are fragile
creatures when we are alone, isolated, and especially when
we are at the mercy of the elements.
Parents today, more than ever, are taking care of
their children alone. Single parent families are much
more common than they were even a generation ago,
and extended family support systems are less common.
25
This isolation in parenting is not easy. Single parents are

responsible for every aspect of rearing their children and
I imagine it must often be a lonely and difficult task. In
other families, work frequently takes one of the parents
away from home and the other parent is alone, caring for
the household and the children. Isolation and loneliness
can be real challenges when raising a family.
Before we had children, Shawn traveled extensively for
his work. We knew that this was going to be a part of our
lives that we would have to manage carefully while raising
a family, and it was a challenge we happily accepted. It has
not always been easy. It sometimes feels like the inanimate
objects in our world know when Shawn is away. The car
waits until he is gone to suddenly quit in the grocery store
parking lot, and the air conditioner quits when he is on
the other side of the world!
When the girls were little, it was especially hard for
me when one or both of them were sick. I had no one to
help, or watch them, so that I could just run out and get
medicine or juice! Isolation has not been an easy part of
parenting, but we have learned to cope with it in different
ways over the years.
There are several practical things that have made
isolation easier for our little family. In the first place, it is
important to the whole family that everyone knows that
absences are kept to only those that are essential. This
number, obviously, varies widely from family to family.
Military men and women may need to be away from home
for an entire year, but it is still important that everyone
understands that this time away is essential to the parent’s
work, and that the parent does not accept assignments
away from home lightly.
We have made it a practice that from the youngest age,
we include our daughters in the discussions of why daddy
is away. We talk to them about how he is helping people to
ISOLATION 27
learn about Jesus. We visit the library and read books about
the people and the culture of the places in which Shawn is
working. We also make it clear to them that their sacrifice
of not having their dad at home for a little while means
that they are doing an important job, too, and that they
are helping the whole family. We are working together for
the good of the family. Our daughters have accepted this
assignment gladly, and although there are days when they
just miss their dad and wish that he were home, generally
they are very brave.
When possible, we accompany Shawn on short trips,
and often on long stints away from home, we will visit
him for a part of the time. Modern technology has been
a tremendous practical blessing, too. Now with satellite
phone service, Shawn was able to call home from the
depths of the Canadian Arctic last year! We both have Web
cameras on our computers and we use these often. Shawn
will even pick up his laptop, and with the Web camera, give
the girls a “tour” of his hotel room, and show them what it
looks like outside his window.
There are a few little things that I do daily while
Shawn is away that together make the difference between
miserable isolation and tolerable aloneness. The parent
at home, in our case me, has a tremendous influence on
how the children perceive the other parent’s absence. I
have, from the beginning, been extremely positive about
Shawn’s travel. There have been days where I have felt
like I just couldn’t go through another day alone, but I
have never let that show around the girls. I save the tears
and frustration until after they are in bed at night. When
we moved a few years ago, I made a conscious decision to
only surround myself with friends who were supportive
and encouraging about Shawn’s absences. I didn’t want
anyone dragging me down into a pity party, and this has
helped me considerably.
I’ve also learned, through trial and error, that he

is away often enough that it works best if we stick to our
usual household routine, even when alone. I do save
certain things for when he is gone, such as sleepovers with
friends and certain outings, but generally, keeping to the
same routine gives a sense of comfort and regularity for
the children. When Natalie was two she fell in love with
chocolate pudding! The girl could eat it every day if I let
her and so I rationed her by saying that I would only buy it
when daddy was away. For some reason, this has stuck over
the years, and even now I still buy them chocolate pudding
when Shawn is gone.
Every obstacle in our lives, and especially in our
parenting experience, teaches us about God. He uses these
challenges to draw us closer to Him. Shawn’s absences
remind us of Jesus and His work. Right now we have to be
away from Him, but He still provides. Just as the parent who
is away is still caring for and providing for the family, Jesus
is working with us and for us in heaven. He is preparing
a future for us, just as the absent parent is doing for the
family. It is a beautiful picture.
My strength and hope while parenting in isolation has
always been that I’m never actually parenting in isolation.
I am never alone, no matter how alone I perceive myself to
be. One of my favorite verses is Deuteronomy 31:8 (NIV):
“The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; he
will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be
discouraged.”
God Himself is always with me. He is always available to

listen, to share my frustrations with and to encourage me.
And so, isolation is, in the end, never a factor! I love the
verse in Hebrews 13:5 (NIV), too:
ISOLATION 29
“…never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.”
God is the cure for isolation! He is the source of

strength and power for the parent who is parenting
alone.
❦
Underdosing on the Best Medicine
A few weeks ago, while driving to Natalie’s piano

lesson, I had a magnificent view of a crescent moon, bright
and glowing in the evening sky.
“Look at the shape of the moon,” I said to Natalie and
Naomi, who were riding in the back seat.
They oohed and aahed appropriately and then Naomi
said, “Maybe the aliens are using their flashlights and
lighting up only part of the moon!”
Before I could say a thing, Natalie retorted, “Naomi,
what do they teach you at school?” I started laughing
hysterically, and the girls joined me. We were still laughing
when we arrived at the piano studio!
A good belly laugh is one of the best feelings in the
world, isn’t it? All of the cares of the last few hours seem to
melt away. Laughter really is still the best medicine, and as
parents, too often we underdose on it! The responsibility
that we bear for the well being of our children is huge, and
weighs heavily on us a lot of the time.
Time pressures and demands can consume every
waking moment. A typical day at our house involves me
hurrying the girls out to the car on time for school, running
to the classroom because we are late, going to the office,
picking up the girls from school, then heading home for
homework, piano practice, dinner, baths and bedtime.
Whew…barely a second to catch our breath, never
mind laugh! The day ends with everyone seriously
underdosed with joy. These kinds of days are typical, but
30
UNDERDOSING ON THE BEST MEDICINE 31
everyone is happier when they get a dose of joy in the mix

of even the busiest days.
Motherhood seems to bring out the “Martha” in many
women, myself included. We have huge demands on our
time, and these demands are often overwhelming. Let’s
take a look at the story of sisters Martha and Mary, as found
in the Bible. These sisters, and their brother Lazarus,
were all friends of Jesus. One afternoon, Jesus was in their
village and so Martha invited him to their home for a meal.
It became a wonderful time of fellowship, and many of
Jesus’ followers gathered in their home to listen to Him.
Martha was busy rushing about in the kitchen getting the
food ready and serving her many guests, and where was
her sister? She should have been helping, but instead she
was seated among the others, listening to Jesus.
I can imagine Martha, alone in the kitchen, slamming
down a pot and muttering to herself. Martha was upset,
indeed, and she approached Jesus and said, “Lord, do
You not care that my sister has left me to serve alone?
Therefore tell her to help me.”
I can feel the frustration in Martha’s voice. She was
overwhelmed—alone and desperate for help. I’ve been
there myself many a time. She pled to Jesus for justice.
Jesus—God—is the embodiment of justice, but His answer
surprised Martha, and might surprise you, too. He said,
“Martha, Martha, you are worried and troubled about
many things. But one thing is needed, and Mary has
chosen that good part, which will not be taken away from
her.”
Wow! I can imagine that took a minute or two for
Martha to understand and accept. Jesus had reminded her
that He was more important than making sure that each
guest had a refill of grape juice. This story is a wonderful
reminder that the joys of life are often fleeting. It is best
to take time for God and for the pleasures that He has
provided for us in life, and to set our inner Marthas aside

and experience the joy of living.
God doesn’t want us to go through our lives miserable,
our heads down, plowing through an impossible to-do list.
If God had wanted robots, he would have created us that
way! I can’t prove it, but I imagine that God Himself likes
to laugh. Look at Zephaniah 3:17 (KJV):
“The Lord thy God in the midst of thee is mighty; he will save,
he will rejoice over thee with joy; he will rest in his love, he will joy
over thee with singing.”
God joys over us with singing! That verse is a wonderful

comfort to me, because it is a reminder that God is my
creator, my Heavenly Father, and not an absent taskmaster.
He is a loving Father, and if He takes the time to joy over
me, a sinful child, I should certainly have the time to joy
over my beautiful children.
My greatest doses of joy in life come from the little
things. Really! Like Naomi’s goodnight kisses. She puts so
much gusto into puckering up her little lips and smacking
them against our cheeks at night, that there is nothing in
the world like it.
When I’m away from home, accompanying Shawn on
a trip, my favorite moment home, after the welcome home
hugs, is Naomi’s good night kiss.
Then there is the memory of the time that Natalie first
laughed. I had her all bundled up in her snowsuit and we
were ready to go somewhere with daddy. For some reason,
Shawn was late picking us up, and so I was sitting on the
bottom step on the stairs, bouncing her on my lap and
singing “God told old Noah, to build him an arky, arky…”
She was all smiles and then it happened…a giggle! My
heart leapt for joy. I sang the song again and there was
another giggle. By the time Shawn got there, Natalie and I
UNDERDOSING ON THE BEST MEDICINE 33
were both laughing over and over. Natalie still has a really
infectious giggle and it brings wonderful joy to my heart
whenever I hear it.
By nature I am not a goofy person. I love to laugh,
but I’m rarely the person who initiates the silliness. I’ve
been making a conscious effort to move myself out of
my comfort zone, though, and into the silly zone. With
both girls in school now, so much of my time with them is
“scheduled” time where we have to conquer homework or
chores, or something similar. So, I’ve been getting my joy
doses in little bursts, wherever I can.
Just before Christmas is the busiest time of the year for
our family. One day this past year, the girls and I were all
overtired and cranky. We were sitting at the table trying to
get homework done. I had to hop up and work on dinner
at one point. As I looked back at the kitchen table, their
long faces and slumped shoulders seemed so wrong for
such young kids.
It was going to be Christmas soon, and we were all
miserable. So, I forced myself WAY out of my comfort zone
and in my most exaggerated British accent, I asked the
girls if they would care for broccoli or carrots with their
“tea” this evening.
Their little faces lit up and their shoulders straightened.
“Mommy,” asked Natalie, “was that YOU talking?”
I replied, staying true to my newfound British character,
“Yes, love. Would you care for a biscuit?”
I kept up the silliness until bedtime, and all of our
moods improved! I think we overdosed on joy that
evening, if that is possible.
Shawn is the expert in the silliness department. He
loves to be Mr. Fun. He can make the girls giggle just by
crossing his eyes or winking. They know that daddy equals
fun, and he normally has no problem getting his daily dose
of joy.
On summer vacation a few years ago, we splurged a

little and took the girls to Legoland. They enjoyed it, but
daddy enjoyed it even more! We bought a big tub of Legos
the next day and Shawn and the girls spent hours building
houses, towers and even a lion. Shawn said that it was for
them, but I know that he enjoyed playing with those Legos
as much as they did. When Shawn is away, he will often call
home and give the girls a little “silliness pep talk”—just
enough to hold them over until he comes home!
Journaling lets me experience my joys over and over
again. Kids say the funniest things, and I could fill this
entire volume with ones that just our two have come up
with. I think of my journal as a joy journal, and over and
over again, I get great joy reading the funny things that
the girls have said. This is from one of my recent journal
entries:
Naomi was sick for a few days and hadn’t eaten
anything, and so when I finally got her to eat some soup
and a piece of bread for supper, I was thrilled. She mostly
picked the potatoes out of her soup and left her bread
crust on her plate and then asked, “Do I have to eat my
crust, Mommy?”
I replied, “No, not tonight honey.”
“Wow,” she answered, “you’re way nicer to me when
I’m sick!”
I laughed then, and again every time I read it—getting
a dose of joy every time!
❦
Preventive Medicine
There are a few awkward situations in life that make

us all uncomfortable, and here is one of them. You are at
a friend’s house, or in a public place, and a child starts to
misbehave. We’ve all been in that position before, haven’t
we? The child misbehaving doesn’t usually bother me too
much; I’m always just glad that it is not my child causing
the scene that day.
The awkward part begins when the parent either
ignores the blatant rebellion, or comes down on the
kid with a crushing blow to their spirit. I feel terribly
uncomfortable when another parent is, in my opinion,
unduly harsh with their child. I cringe and fidget and
just want to be anywhere but there. It is terrible. Likewise,
when the parent is conciliatory toward a rebellious child,
I feel like screaming, “Would you please do something to
make that kid stop?” Both extremes are awkward, and they
typify why the subject of discipline is so complex and full
of emotion. One parent’s definition of harsh might be
another’s definition of lenient.
Disciplining a child is like using preventive medicine!
When a child is disciplined lovingly and consistently, he or
she is being trained to be a good, moral and law abiding
adult. Shawn and I don’t like to send our daughters to the
corner, or to ground them from an activity, but we know
that it is in their best interest. I can’t count how many
times I have told them, “I don’t like to punish you, but it
is my job, as your mommy, to help you to grow up to be
35
a nice lady.” They hear it often, but they probably won’t

understand until they are nice, grown up ladies!
When doling out some preventive medicine, finding
the balance is really important. Children are very trusting
of their parents, and it is easy to crush their spirits if they
are treated harshly.
At the same time, it is our parental duty to provide them
with a framework in which to live and act. I’ve certainly not
been a model parent in this area, but my goal is simple.
When disciplining our children, our motto is “kind but
firm.” I have literally chanted these words to myself, teeth
clenched, as I’ve faced a defiant little angel!
Shawn and I are both strong-minded (read: stubborn)
and, not surprisingly, so are our two offspring! When
things get really heated with our girls, I send them to
their rooms for a time out and, more often than not, it is
because mommy needs a time out to think things over and
cool down, too.
Preventive medicine is part of the burdensome side
of parenting. Finding the right balance, and consistently
adhering to it, can make the difference between a happy
home and a miserable one. “Kind but firm” is the balance
that we are comfortable with in our home.
There are many days when I wish that I didn’t have
to discipline my girls. I wish that this preventive medicine
would be a little less painful, or that maybe we could just
skip it altogether. I know that if it were put to a vote, the
girls would certainly relegate it to the history books. It is
easier to not discipline. Consistent, fair discipline takes a
lot of work. In the short term it is much easier to let things
slide.
Our children are only perfect when they are sleeping,
and I regularly have to act as referee around our house.
On innumerable occasions I have been in the middle of a
task, answering an e-mail or getting dinner ready, when a
PREVENTIVE MEDICINE 37
fight breaks out upstairs. I hear Natalie holler, or Naomi

squeal, and I cringe!
I want to ignore it, pretend that I didn’t hear it and
actually finish an entire job without an interruption. I
wait awhile and see if they resolve it themselves, but if it
continues, I wearily march upstairs and dish out a little
preventive medicine. It would be so much easier to let it
slide, but in my heart I know that I would be doing them
a disservice. The consequences of fighting with your sister
are much easier to take than the consequences of fighting
with your boss.
It is much better that they learn the consequences for
their actions now, in the confines of a loving family, rather
than later as an adult where, in the real world, long-term
consequences are harsh. It is better that they learn not to
“borrow” a toy from the kindergarten room, than to reap
the consequences of stealing in the adult world. The Bible
is clear when it says in Proverbs 13:24 (ESV):
“He who spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is
diligent to discipline him.”
The idea of using a rod is unthinkable to most

modern parents, but the principle is the same: if you fail
to discipline your child, you are shortchanging them.
Like anything worth having in life, taking the time for
preventive medicine isn’t always easy, but it is the right
thing to do.
So, how do the roles of mom and dad differ when it
comes to the issue of discipline? Typically, the dad is the
“alpha male” in the family, and the children look to him
for guidance and a strict adherence to the family rules of
conduct. Perhaps this is because fathers have deeper voices
and are generally less involved in the daily nurturing of
children. The traditional role of the father gives him a
voice of authority. In our family, Shawn is Mr. Fun! He

loves to play and goof around, but he is also the final court
of appeal when it comes to discipline. The girls know that
when daddy asks something of them, he means it, and that
disrespecting him is not an option. It is better that they
learn to respect their parents now, than to learn the lesson
later when disrespecting a police officer or a judge. The
Bible has some very clear instruction for fathers. Ephesians
6:4 (ESV) says:
“Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring

them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.”
God desires that fathers raise their children, teaching

them in love how to be responsible adults, and also to
learn of God and His love.
The mother’s role in teaching and correcting the
children is equally important. We work together to
provide a consistent and united front. With Shawn gone so
often, the bulk of the correction and teaching of the girls
becomes my responsibility. Sometimes I feel like I have to
be the big meanie, and then he comes home and gets to
be the fun parent!
My feelings aside, I know that it is important that our
family expectations and rules are consistent, even when
daddy isn’t home. My approach to specific situations
might be different from his, because by my nature I am
the nurturing, caregiving parent, but the principles that
I follow are the same. Also, the children know that daddy
stands behind my decision, even if he is not home.
From my point of view, it is unhealthy for one parent
to undermine the wishes of the other. Preventive medicine
is ineffective when children receive inconsistent, or
contradictory doses! I have seen the pain and confusion
that it causes.
PREVENTIVE MEDICINE 39
A child that grows up in a family where one parent

disrespects and contradicts the other is learning to
disrespect and belittle their future spouse. It sets the child
up for an unhappy home life in the future, and it is a
terrible inheritance.
Consistent preventive medicine lovingly, kindly and
firmly given by both parents gives the child an inoculation
against future heartache. It isn’t always easy to administer,
but the results last a lifetime. Proverbs 22:6 says:
“Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old

he will not turn from it.”
This is a promise that we can claim and then cling to.

❦
Poisons
When Naomi was just 20 months old, we moved from

Toronto, Canada, to Southern California. It was a busy,
stressful and exciting time. We had been unable to find a
home here in California before we made our move, and so
we put all of our things in storage in Toronto, and moved
on faith.
God was working mightily, and before the girls and I
had even arrived, Shawn had already found us a house! We
had to wait for a month until we could move into it, and
so we gladly accepted the kind invitation of friends to stay
in their home while we waited. It was hectic with escrow
paperwork, immigration paperwork, and Shawn starting a
new job. One evening, I agreed to prepare dinner while
the rest of the adults were at work. I was busy in the kitchen
when I suddenly realized that the house was VERY quiet.
I went to check on the girls and found Natalie quietly
looking at a picture book. Good!
Then, I found Naomi. She was sitting on the bathroom
floor, a half eaten pill in her hand. I panicked! I plunged
my fingers into her mouth to see if more were inside, but
her mouth was empty. I grabbed the little pill and saw
that very little had been eaten, and looking at her shirt,
probably not swallowed, but spit out. The pill was an adult
extra strength Tylenol. I still don’t know where exactly
they came from, but there were a few loose pills on the
bottom of the open drawer beside her, and I had no way of
knowing how many she had eaten.
40
POISONS 41
I wasn’t ready to take a chance, and so I phoned Shawn

right away. He was back shortly and we took Naomi to the
ER. A blood test, and an ECG later, we discovered that she
was just fine. None of the Tylenol had made it into her
system. Praise God! It was only once we were sure that she
was okay that the nurse told me, “She is a lucky little girl. A
Tylenol overdose in young children can be fatal.” I prayed
to God that night and praised him for keeping our baby
out of harm’s way, and for saving her from the poison!
Poisons are all around our children. The physical
poisons are usually quite easy to control. When the
children are little, we keep the poisons locked up and out
of their reach. When they get a little older, we teach them
to read labels, and not to touch anything with a skull and
crossbones on the label.
The poisons that are much more evasive, and eternally
harmful, are the ones that poison the soul. The modern
world is full of them: inappropriate television programs,
explicit ads in stores and on the Internet, and materialism
in every shape, size and color. Spiritual poisons permeate
our modern world and are impossible to completely
avoid.
Television can be both a blessing and a poison. I cannot
say that all television is poisonous, of course, because we
use television to tell the world about God and His love each
week. Any medium that allows this work to be done cannot
be all bad. Television, however, is much different than it
was even just one generation ago. When Shawn and I were
children, we both remember having two channels and,
sometimes, if you wiggled the rabbit ears just right, you
could get three. Most of the programming was appropriate
for the family to watch, and the inappropriate stuff was at
least relegated to the later time slots, or cable channels.
Most of what we watched seems harmless by today’s
standards. The standards for acceptable family viewing
have changed dramatically, and they put the modern

parent in a unique position. Often, even when a family
friendly program is playing, the advertisements are
hideously inappropriate, and it makes me feel like there is
just no way to win! The children in many “kids” programs
are whiny, mouthy, cutting class, and making fun of their
parents. This kind of poison may seem innocent, but it is
harmful, nonetheless. The Internet is no better. Natalie
figured out long ago that certain websites play long TV
clips.
You may be one of the rare families in North America
that has banished the TV from your home, but most of
us have at least one in the house. It can be a vehicle for
good, and so the question becomes, how do we control it?
What is educational and innocent, and which programs
are poisonous?
The first choice has to be to control what kind of TV
comes into the house. We decided we didn’t need all 7,000
channels that the cable guy wanted to sell us. There are
options. On our satellite system there is a family package
that offers only family appropriate channels. No matter
the package or lineup that you choose, it is really easy
nowadays to block inappropriate channels from little eyes,
and really there is no excuse not to.
We have a few favorite family TV shows that we are
comfortable with watching, but more often than not, when
we sit down to watch something, we choose a DVD. There
are so many fantastic programs on DVD nowadays, that
our girls get to grow up watching Little House on the Prairie
and The Waltons. I’m just a little bit too young to remember
The Waltons, and so I am learning to love it right along with
them!
When it comes to TV and the Internet, it has helped
me to remember who is the boss! I am still the parent, last
time I checked, and I have the right to say “no” to certain
POISONS 43
programs, and to decide whether or not the TV comes on.

Children are not the best judges of what kind of, and how
much, TV they watch, or how many games they play on
the Internet. I have found that careful guidance is really
necessary.
During the school year, our TV rarely comes on during
weekdays. Life is just too busy. I’ve had a hand in this,
too, because the first infraction of the week, and the first
dose of preventive medicine that I dole out is the loss of
TV privileges. It is the first thing to go! It is difficult to
negotiate TV privileges with an emotional child, but it is
very important. Just like we put the cleaning supplies up
high when children are little, TV viewing needs parental
monitoring!
Natalie has always loved to dress up and look pretty. It
just seems to be a part of her genetic makeup. When she
was barely two years old, a friend traveled to Brazil and
brought her back a beautiful little dress. It fit her to a T
and came down to her ankles. As Natalie was twirling in her
new dress and admiring herself in the mirror, Shawn and
I giggled. “Natalie,” Shawn teased, “are you vain?” Natalie
batted her eyelashes at herself in the mirror and quickly
replied, “I’m not vain. I’m gorgeous!” We’ll probably still
be teasing her about that one when we’re 80.
Natalie has a natural love for pretty, sparkly things,
and most of the time this is innocent and sweet—but not
always, because our modern world is so incredibly geared
toward materialism. Our kids are exposed to a lot more
stuff than we ever were just a generation ago. Having more
stuff is not the road to happiness, but our materialistically
oriented world seems to teach kids that it is!
We live in Southern California, arguably the most
materialistic society of our present age, and so it is a
particular problem in our family. It is difficult to keep the
children grounded, when the emphasis on “things” is all
around them. Society’s modern materialistic expectations

are so high. We don’t want to do without anything, and
are willing to put ourselves into terrible debt to have
everything that we want right away. This lifestyle can easily
translate to our children, and can poison their sense of
priorities.
Since raising our daughters in a bubble isn’t an option,
we talk to them a lot about making good choices. We talk
freely about what it is like for families in other parts of the
world, and about how blessed we are to live in the West
and to have enough food to eat, and nice clothes to wear.
There are a few constant challenges, though, like birthday
parties. Some of their friends have nice, reasonable parties,
but there have been a few that are just over the top! I don’t
allow myself to feel the pressure to “compete,” but instead
try to think creatively to give my girls memorable, but sane,
parties.
Naomi loves dogs and is particularly attached to a
friend’s border collie, Kali. She wanted to have a doggy
party, and since we don’t have a dog, we invited Kali to the
party along with all of Naomi’s little friends. Her birthday
is in the spring, and so the kids had a great time petting
the dog, and playing an assortment of party games in the
backyard—then chasing the dog all through the house!
It was simple, but Naomi was very happy. Living in a
materialistically obsessed world makes it difficult to keep
our priorities straight, but it isn’t impossible.
We had a good lesson in money priorities over
Christmas break last year. It was one of those quiet, sleepy
days between Christmas and the New Year, and the girls
decided to draw pictures and set up an art gallery. The
pictures were all for sale, of course, and the sales pitches
began. They even offered commissioned originals; we
could put in our orders. Shawn, always ready to encourage
a little entrepre-neurship in his girls, gladly put in a couple
POISONS 45
of orders, and so did I. We were having fun, and Shawn was

feeling generous. He sent the girls to their rooms to get
their wallets. They ran upstairs, and Shawn got his wallet
out, and was getting ready to pay them their price, plus a
little bonus.
Shawn’s generosity suddenly vanished when the
girls appeared, and he discovered that they both had
empty wallets! “Where is all of your money?” he asked,
flabbergasted.
“We both spent our money,” Natalie answered matter-
of-factly, Naomi nodding beside her.
I must admit that I was at least a little to blame, because
I had let them spend their money and had not kept track
of how quickly it was going.
Shawn took out the money for the art, but didn’t
hand it over. He got out a little binder and a couple of
envelopes, and set up an account sheet for each of them.
The girls already understood what tithing is, but they
got a little refresher course. Shawn put the money in the
envelopes and it was decided that there was to be no more
free spending of money, other than a little bit from their
allowance each week, until they had each managed to save
$100.
This news did not go over well at first, but the girls
have now taken up the challenge with gusto. At the time
of this writing, three months have passed and they are
getting close, but are still not there. I do believe that they
are learning, though, and that they’ll probably always
remember this. The poison of materialism is insidious, and
it takes a little tough slugging to fight against it.
❦
Inoculations
The world that our Creator made for us is full of

wonder and beauty. It is also, sadly, full of disease and
poison, and unless we live on a deserted island, our
children are in contact with them every day. Our world
was created as a perfect paradise. It was only after sin came
into it that the disease and poison affected God’s perfect
design. All that is still good in our world comes from God,
and all that is bad is a result of sin. How do we as parents
protect our children from the bad, and particularly from
choosing the bad?
An inoculation is the introduction of an antigen into
the body to create immunity to a particular disease. So,
what is the antigen against sin? Certainly, it is the love
of God. God’s love is free and readily available as a daily
inoculation against sin and the big bad world. In our
family we have discovered a wonderful, free way to daily
inoculate our children and expose them to the antigen. It
is through family worship.
Worshipping God daily, and as a family, is a wonderful
way to inoculate children against the big bad world.
Worshipping God together brings our family closer to each
other, and closer to our Heavenly Father, too. Worship
time is a safe, comfortable time to learn about God and
what He has planned for our lives. It is a safe time for the
family to talk about things, and to learn from each other.
Natalie has an incredible memory, and when she hears
something, she rarely forgets it. During worship time she
46
INOCULATIONS 47
loves to teach us what she has learned from the Bible at

school.
Family worship can take many different forms, and
whatever is comfortable for your family is good. It probably
shouldn’t be long, and it should focus on the Bible and on
a time of prayer. It is not meant to be a burden, or a source
of frustration or boredom for the children or the parents.
It is never too early to start! We began reading Bible
stories to the girls and folding their little hands inside of
ours for prayer when they were less than six months old.
We learned long ago to let go of the idealistic picture of
family worship—the image of father in a red cardigan and
seated next to the fire, mother by his side, and the children
gathered round, sparkling clean and smiling.
Modern families don’t usually fit into that picture
perfect stereotype. Parents work shifts and travel, and
children are not always sparkling clean or smiling! In our
family, I lead out in family worship most days, and most
days it is just the girls and me, because of Shawn’s work
schedule. It isn’t ideal, but it is the reality! I challenge
you to embrace your family’s plan for worship and, if you
haven’t already, make it a part of your life. Every day.
Over the years we’ve changed how we have worship
from time to time. We’ve always had worship in the
morning and the evening, but it has had a few different
forms. When the girls were toddlers, I spent a little extra
time with them at morning worship time. After breakfast,
we would read a story, and often bring out props or do a
craft to go with it. We were at home all day and it worked
for us. The day would end with a story, then another Bible
story and prayer at their bedside. It was our bedtime
routine and it worked.
The girls are older now, and both reading, and so we’ve
changed things. Mornings are now crazy busy, and so we
have our morning worship at the breakfast table as we’re
finishing up our toast and juice. We take turns reading out

of a devotional book and then another person prays. It is
a short time, but it is very special. We have the chance to
pray for each other, and uplift one another before we head
out the door into the big bad world. We are drawn closer
to God, and we are inoculated with His love.
We have our evening worship around the dinner table,
or in the family room if we have been lucky enough to
eat out that night! We read a Bible storybook together. It
isn’t always easy to find books that are at both Natalie and
Naomi’s interest or reading level, and so we alternate. We
read more books aimed at Natalie’s level, which I think is
good for Naomi, but we do read books that are for Naomi’s
age level, too. It is a time for the girls to practice their
reading skills, to ask questions and to talk about whatever
is important to them that day. We then close in prayer.
At bedtime, Natalie has her own devotional reading
time. She is eight now, and so she enjoys reading at
bedtime and being in control of this time. We have given
her the freedom to dictate her personal devotional time.
This is an important part of her building a relationship
with God for herself. Naomi is still pretty little and she
still likes one of us to read to her and pray with her. I’ll be
sad when this phase passes and she is independent, too!
Our patterns of worship work for us right now, and when
they stop working we’ll change it up, but we’ll continue to
come to Him morning and night.
A few years ago we started a fun tradition in our house.
It is one that our girls love, and look forward to each week.
Every Friday night, we have a special meal and eat it in the
family room around the coffee table. We dim the lights,
light the fire (if it is winter) and play soft music. The girls
and I set the table with a tablecloth, candles and our good
stemware. We enjoy finger foods, drink bubbly grape juice
and, inspired by the Jewish tradition, eat Challah bread.
INOCULATIONS 49
Before we eat, though, Shawn leads out in family

worship, and then has a special prayer for our girls. We
linger around the table for quite some time after we’ve
finished eating, and it is a special time.
When we are away from home the girls miss it, and
they even talk to each other in terms of one “Challah” to
the next—meaning a week’s time. We didn’t plan for this
to become a tradition in our family. We tried it once and
we liked it, and so we tried it again the next week. This
particular family worship routine is special to us because
it works for our family. The modern world does have its
wonderful technological advantages. When Shawn is away,
he joins us for Friday night worship by Web camera. We set
my laptop on the couch and it is almost like he’s there!
Worship is also something that happens outside of
the designated worship times. It is a time to draw closer
to God, and to offer Him adoration and praise. It is a part
of all that we do, day in and day out, and I love to find
things in the world to praise and thank God for. Beautiful
flowers, or a funny looking bird, are reminders of God’s
love and creativity. We worship God in the small things in
life, by talking to the girls about them, and sharing how
God created them all for us.
Corporate worship, in church, is also important to our
family. I don’t believe that God intended for us to worship
Him in a vacuum. He created all of us, His children,
and He also made us social creatures. We can learn, be
encouraged and be uplifted through fellowship with like-
minded believers. A church family is an extension of the
home, and offers a lot of antigens against the bad in the
world.
Personally, I have found that the friends I have made
through my church family have helped me tremendously
in my parenting experience. It has been very encouraging
to have friends—who are going through the same things—
that I can talk to and bounce ideas off of! It has also been
helpful to have friends whose children are grown up, and
to learn from their experiences. No church is perfect, it is
made up of errant humans after all, but a Bible believing
church is a wonderful place to let your children get
another inoculation against the big bad world.
❦
Hypothermia
As I write this, I am on an airplane and just beginning

a long journey across the Pacific to get back home. As
usual, before we took off, the safety video was played and
instruction “in the event of an emergency” was given.
Included in the safety demonstration was the usual re-
minder that should the cabin pressure fall, oxygen masks
will appear above your seat. This always seems less than
comforting to me for some reason!
The video then reminded us all that “If you are traveling
with someone who needs assistance, please secure your
own mask first, and then you may assist others.” The video
then showed a computer-animated mother, oxygen mask
on, calmly assisting her smiling child. Whenever I hear this
safety reminder, a little rebellion always bubbles up in my
soul. “Yeah, right,” I think, “I would never put my own mask on
first in an emergency!”
I think that is the typical parental reaction to the
situation. The children always come first, even at the
cost of our own lives. That is how we are designed to
feel about our precious offspring, and it is a God-given
determination.
Is it always the right choice, though? Well, in the case
of a burning building, or a teeming river, I would gladly
enter any scary situation to save the life of either of my
children. I wouldn’t hesitate for a nanosecond, and I
know that Shawn feels the same way. There may be some
crazy-minded people who actually think that the airlines
51
are right about the oxygen masks, too. There is one area,
though, that our paternal desire to put our children—and
every commitment and chore that comes with parenting—
first is definitely wrong. This is in our spiritual lives. It
can lead to spiritual hypothermia, which, like its physical
equivalent, can be fatal.
Hypothermia is a real concern and danger in cold
climates, even today in our modern world. When we lived
in the northern part of Canada, Shawn drove many miles
between our three churches. Much of his driving was on
quiet roads with little traffic, and so I worried about him
a lot. In the winter, he always carried a sleeping bag, a
candle, matches and a Coleman camping stove with fuel,
in the back of our minivan.
We knew that if he were to have a problem with the
vehicle that these things could prevent hypothermia, and
keep him alive until help came.
Spiritual hypothermia isn’t only for those who live in
cold climates! It sets in slowly and insidiously over time in
the absence of the warmth of God’s love. It may take years
or months, and one may sense it coming on, or a person
might just wake up one morning and find themselves
frozen to the warming rays of anything spiritual.
God and His love never leave us; He is always with us.
Deuteronomy 31:6 tells us:
“Be strong and of good courage…for the Lord your God, He

is the One who goes with you. He will not leave you nor forsake
you.”
Hypothermia sets in when we consciously, or uncon-

sciously, neglect to spend time with Him.
I think that parents are particularly prone to this
problem, and that for the most part it is unconscious. We
are just too busy! We have a million things to accomplish
HYPOTHERMIA 53
during the day, and then another thousand that we

hurriedly squeeze in after the children are asleep! Our
schedules are too tightly packed to allow us to take the
time that we should to read the Bible and to pray. Not for
the children, not to teach a class, but just for us. Just to feel
the warmth of God’s love and thrive under His care. It is so
easy to set it aside, and I certainly have been guilty of being
neglectful of my spiritual life at different times.
Life is hectic, and children by nature like to scramble
our perfectly ordered routines and schedules. I always feel
guilty when I take time for myself, too. The housework
is never done, and there is always at least one item of
clothing that needs repair.
There is a verse in the Bible that makes me think that
God really understands the nurturing part of the human
heart. I feel that He understands what it is like to care for
our children, even at our own expense. This verse talks
about how God felt when the city of Jerusalem was being
destroyed. Matthew 23:37 (KJV), says:
“How often would I have gathered thy children together, even

as a hen gathers her chicks under her wings.”
God understands the indescribable longing in a

parent’s heart to care for and protect one’s children. We
are His children and He feels that way about us.
The results of spiritual hypothermia aren’t pleasant.
They come on gradually over time and eventually leave you
frozen and joyless. We are left to go through the motions
of life, frustrated, feeling alone and unhappy.
So, what are the benefits of a life full of the warmth of
God’s love? The benefits are beyond my human capacity to
understand fully, because they are innumerable. The Bible
is full of inspiration and reassurances of God’s love, and
one of my favorite verses is in Jeremiah 17, verses 7 and 8:
“Blessed is the man [or woman] who trusts in the Lord, and
whose hope is the Lord. For he [or she] shall be like a tree planted by
the waters, which spreads out its roots by the river, and will not fear
when heat comes, but its leaf will be green, and will not be anxious
in the year of drought, nor will cease from yielding fruit.”
In my life I have noticed that there are two things

that if I make time for them—just for me—I seem to gain
back the hours and minutes throughout the day. The
accounting of time in debits and credits doesn’t seem to
apply when I take time to pray and read my Bible, or when
I take time to walk. Somehow these activities feed my soul
so incredibly that I end up making up the lost time! I’m
not sure if it is because I move faster the rest of the day, or
if I just have a better attitude about not getting through
my to-do list.
I have often struggled with guilt over taking any time
for myself in the day, but I recently came to a rather
obvious, eye-opening conclusion. The best thing that I can
give my children is a content, spiritually alive mother, and
not a frozen, cranky one. No one wants to live in a home
with a cranky parent, although that’s not to say that I don’t
have my off days; I’m far from perfect! We all know, too,
that children learn by observing us. They are incredibly
perceptive little creatures, too, and they can discern
whether we have the love of God warming us, or if we are
frozen icicles, stiffly going through the motions.
The wonderful part about it is that God gives us His
warmth and love freely. We don’t have to be good enough,
smart enough or good-looking enough to receive it. Like
the sun’s warming rays, His love is free to all His children,
and all we need to do is bask in it a little while. I don’t worry
about physical hypothermia anymore, now that we live in
a warm climate. God’s love and warmth have provided a
happy shield against spiritual hypothermia, too.
❦
The Great Physician
Parenting is so often about surviving one emergency

after another. It is fast paced, hectic and pushes us into
sensory overload! Shawn and I have found that there is
absolutely only one way to survive this emergency. Visit the
ER Doctor, and visit Him often. We don’t worry about the
bill, because His is free! We visit Him daily, and take the
kids along. The Doctor knows the whole family intimately.
The Doctor is our coach, confidant, teacher, healer and
Savior.
The ER Doctor, of course, is the Great Physician, who
is God Himself. It was God’s plan to allow us to become
parents of His precious children. It is also His plan that
we draw closer to Him, and learn more about Him by
being parents. He is fully aware of each emergency that we
encounter, and He uses each one to teach us more about
Him, and to have us become closer to Him.
I have learned so much about God by being a parent—
things that I don’t think I could have comprehended any
other way. God knew that, and so He allowed two darling
little patience testers to enter my life! I have learned of
God’s patience by experiencing my own patience and
impatience with my children.
When the girls first learn a new skill, it is so easy to be
patient with them. I held their hands tightly as their wobbly
little legs fought to take their first steps. I listened patiently
for hours as they stumbled over syllables and sentences as
they learned to read.
55
I had an infinite amount of patience because I was full

of love and joy at my children’s learning and discovery.
That is how God is with us. He is full of joy and love and
infinite patience.
My own impatience has also taught me about God.
So often my patience has grown short with my children
when their behavior has been less than model perfect.
Admittedly, I have even grown impatient with them when
I was at fault and they were completely innocent, too. It is
so very easy to do when tensions are high, sleep is lacking
and I’m preoccupied. This has taught me so much about
the character of God. How often I have given Him cause
to become impatient with me. I have let Him down so
often, and yet He is always patient and loving with me. His
patience goes beyond what I deserve, and far beyond my
understanding.
God is love. As it says in John 3:16:
“For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten
Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have
everlasting life.”
God is love, and I am much better able to understand

that now than I was nine years ago. From the moment I
saw Natalie’s tiny fingers and toes swishing fuzzily on the
ultrasound monitor, my heart was changed. I had only
begun to experience a little piece of heaven.
Parental love of a child is different from any other kind
of love. God has taught Shawn and me so much about His
love through our experiences as parents. There is nothing
in this world that either Natalie or Naomi could ever do
that would make Shawn or me stop loving them. Certainly,
we could be disappointed or regretful, but that would not
supersede the love that we have for them. They will always
be our children, a part of us.
THE GREAT PHYSICIAN 57
This is a sinful world and, sadly, not every parent over

the years has felt this way about his or her children. Yet,
the fact that I, a sinful human being, am capable of loving
my children so fully, allows me to see the scope of God’s
love. The intense love that we feel for our girls is nothing
in comparison to the love that God has for each of His
children. His love is deeper than a mother’s love. His love
is stronger than a father’s love. God’s love is unconditional.
There is nothing that any of His children could ever do
to make Him stop loving them. Anything. Ever. It is an
awesome thought.
There are a few especially poignant parenting memories
that Shawn and I will never forget. They are preciously
tucked away in our memory banks and make us beam from
ear to ear when we remember them together. They are the
joys that we share in our daughters’ accomplishments.
Not the big things; they are only eight and five, so they’ve
obviously not graduated from Harvard or Yale yet! We
rejoice in their small, meaningful accomplishments. It has
given us a taste of how God cheers for us, and joys in our
accomplishments.
When Natalie was three months old, Shawn and I just
could not wait until she rolled over. We would place her
baby blanket on the living room floor, or the bedroom
floor, and cheer her along as she tried and tried. She was
always a determined little thing, and she would throw one
of her tiny little legs over and try and try. Finally, one day,
we were watching and coaxing her and suddenly, she did
it! She rolled from her side to her tummy all by herself.
We looked at each other with utter joy and amazement.
We cheered and cried; we were ecstatic. An outsider might
have thought that we were crazy, but our hearts were full
of joy.
Just a few months ago, I was down in the kitchen tidying
up, when Shawn’s voice beckoned me upstairs. It was a day
off and he and the girls had been goofing off upstairs for
a while. I went upstairs, and was met by Shawn’s delighted
face. “Did you know that Naomi can read?” he asked me,
absolutely glowing with joy.
“Well,” I corrected, “she’s learning to read. I mean she’s
got a lot of words down.” Shawn furrowed his eyebrows at
me and motioned for me to sit down.
“Naomi,” he said, “read Mommy the book you just read
me.”
Sparkling with pride, Naomi opened up an old book
we picked up somewhere over the years. It was a first grade
reader. Shocked, I listened as she flawlessly read the first
two pages.
“You helped her,” I whispered.
“I did not,” Shawn insisted.
Quietly, we listened to our baby read us the entire
book. We cheered and cried when she was finished. It was
another time of incredible joy! Oh, how God must joy over
our accomplishments.
Parenting is a challenge. It is often a chore. Parenting
has a lengthy job description that includes changing wet
sheets at 2 a.m., and consoling a crying infant on long
overseas flights. It includes packing lunches that are
guaranteed to come home only half-eaten and, eventually,
it includes letting our children go. It includes more
emergencies than any of us thought possible before we
took on the task!
Parenting is also full of the things that matter most
in this world. It is full of joy and love. Parenting is part of
God’s plan to draw us closer to Him, and to teach us about
Him. We have been blessed by this privilege.
❦
Emergency Quick Reference Guide
In case of the following emergencies, try the suggestions
below:
Fever: The very next request that someone makes of your
time, say “no.” Be careful—the request will likely be for
something important, interesting and something that
cannot go on without you. Still, say “no.”
Fractures and Sprains: Swallow your pride and say sorry.
Hug. Repeat!
Isolation: Put on headphones, close your eyes and listen
to a favorite inspirational song. You’re never far away
from God.
Underdosing on Joy: Find a kindergartener and ask him
or her to tell you a joke. Laugh, and then try the joke on
your spouse later!
Preventive Medicine: For a whole day, say “no” when you
know that it is the right answer, and say “yes,” even when
the request might be inconvenient.
Poison: Unplug the TV and declare it “broken” for a
whole week, or longer if you dare.
Inoculations: Take family worship outside, whether the
weather is warm or freezing, and find something new to
be in awe of God for.
Hypothermia: Give yourself the gift of an hour alone
with your Bible, even if you have to lock yourself in the
bathroom to be uninterrupted.
59
❦
Emergency Help
from the Great Physician
To Find Peace
John 14:27 — “Peace I leave with you, my peace I give to
you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your
heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.”
Proverbs 15:16-17 — “Better is a little with the fear of the
Lord, than great treasure with trouble. Better is a dinner
of herbs where love is, than a fatted calf with hatred.”
1 Peter 5:6-7 — “Therefore humble yourselves under the
mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you in due time,
casting all your care upon Him, for He cares for you.”
Romans 15:13 — “Now may the God of hope fill you with
all joy and peace in believing, that you may abound in
hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.”
Isaiah 32:17 — “The work of righteousness will be peace,
and the effect of righteousness, quietness and assurance
forever.”
To Fight Loneliness
Isaiah 41:10 — “Fear not, for I am with you; be not
dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, yes, I
will help you, I will uphold you with My righteous right
hand.”
Proverbs 18:24 — “A man who has friends must himself
be friendly, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a
brother.”
60
EMERGENCY HELP FROM THE GREAT PHYSICIAN 61
James 4:8 — “Draw near to God and He will draw near to

you.”
Psalm 27:10 — “When my father and my mother forsake
me, then the Lord will take care of me.”
Matthew 28:20 — “…lo, I am with you always, even to the
end of the age.”
To Manage Time Pressures

Proverbs 16:3 — “Commit your works to the Lord, and
your thoughts will be established.”
Psalm 37:5 — “Commit your way to the Lord, trust also in
Him, and He shall bring it to pass.”
Matthew 11:28 — “Come to Me, all you who labor and are
heavy laden, and I will give you rest.”
Proverbs 3:5-6 — “Trust in the Lord with all your heart,
and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways
acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths.”
To Fight Worry
John 14:1 — “Let not your heart be troubled; you believe
in God, believe also in Me.”
Philippians 4:6-7 — “Be anxious for nothing, but in
everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving,
let your requests be made known to God; and the peace
of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard
your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.”
Colossians 3:15 — “And let the peace of God rule in your
hearts, to which also you were called in one body; and be
thankful.”
Philippians 4:19 — “And my God shall supply all your

need according to His riches in glory by Christ Jesus.”
To Grow Stronger Spiritually

Psalm 119:28 — “My soul melts from heaviness;
strengthen me according to Your word.”
Isaiah 40:31 — “But those who wait on the Lord shall
renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like
eagles, they shall run and not be weary, they shall walk
and not faint.”
John 5:39 — “You search the Scriptures, for in them you
think you have eternal life; and these are they which
testify of Me.”
Matthew 5:6 — “Blessed are those who hunger and thirst
for righteousness, for they shall be filled.”
Jeremiah 15:16 — “Your words were found, and I ate
them, and Your word was to me the joy and rejoicing of
my heart; for I am called by Your name, O Lord God of
hosts.”
To Find Forgiveness for Mistakes
1 John 1:9 — “If we confess our sins, He is faithful and
just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all
unrighteousness.”
John 3:17-18 — “For God did not send His Son into the
world to condemn the world, but that the world through
Him might be saved. He who believes in Him is not
condemned; but he who does not believe is condemned
already, because he has not believed in the name of the
only begotten Son of God.”
EMERGENCY HELP FROM THE GREAT PHYSICIAN 63
Psalm 103:12 — “As far as the east is from the west, so far
has He removed our transgressions from us.”
John 5:24 — “Most assuredly, I say to you, he who hears
My word and believes in Him who sent Me has everlasting
life, and shall not come into judgment, but has passed
from death into life.”
1 John 3:20 — “For if our heart condemns us, God is
greater than our heart, and knows all things.”
To Find Joy
Psalm 16:11 — “You will show me the path of life; in Your
presence is fullness of joy; at Your right hand are pleasures
forevermore.”
Psalm 31:24 — “Be of good courage, and He shall
strengthen your heart, all you who hope in the Lord.”
Isaiah 55:12 — “For you shall go out with joy, and be led
out with peace; the mountains and the hills shall break
forth into singing before you, and all the trees of the field
shall clap their hands.”
Psalm 33:21 — “For our heart shall rejoice in Him,
because we have trusted in His holy name.”

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Jean & Shawn Boonstra

and Pacific Press Publishing Association

Copyright 2008 by It Is Written. All Rights Reserved.

Additional copies of this book and a

Unless otherwise noted, all Bible texts are from the

Printed in the United States of America

ISBN 10: 0-8163-2169-8

It is with great trepidation that we begin this little

Jeremiah 29:11 (NIV)

Do you ever feel like your life as a parent is just about

state of emergency parenting has always ruled, or if it is

We were admittedly smug the second time around,

in the business world, but on the home front as well.

“These commandments that I give you today are to be upon

This is a high calling, and one that deserves the utmost

Parenting in today’s world is certainly not business as

Maybe, like me, you have rocked a sick toddler in your

and a fragile little one at that. We never felt like we were

our own childhood lacked. Worry seems to go hand in hand

This verse is a wonderful comfort to me. It reminds

frustrations and mistakes of the day and remind me of the

Worry may continue to plague us all from time to

Have you ever felt like you are constantly running a

is away from home. Technology can also be a time robber,

done recently is to start saying “no” to others and to take

fears, hopes and thanksgivings freely, and then bring them

follow the plan, but would take as much time as I needed.

In spite of our greatest desires and best intentions,

must be the offender, and swiftly applying retribution for

So, as a parent, what can we expect from God when

“If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us

This is the best kind of healing, and it doesn’t require

In our early years of ministry, Shawn and I lived and

This isolation in parenting is not easy. Single parents are

I’ve also learned, through trial and error, that he

God Himself is always with me. He is always available to

“…never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.”

God is the cure for isolation! He is the source of

A few weeks ago, while driving to Natalie’s piano

everyone is happier when they get a dose of joy in the mix

provided for us in life, and to set our inner Marthas aside

God joys over us with singing! That verse is a wonderful

On summer vacation a few years ago, we splurged a

There are a few awkward situations in life that make

a nice lady.” They hear it often, but they probably won’t

fight breaks out upstairs. I hear Natalie holler, or Naomi

The idea of using a rod is unthinkable to most

voice of authority. In our family, Shawn is Mr. Fun! He

“Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring

God desires that fathers raise their children, teaching

A child that grows up in a family where one parent

“Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old

This is a promise that we can claim and then cling to.

When Naomi was just 20 months old, we moved from

I wasn’t ready to take a chance, and so I phoned Shawn

have changed dramatically, and they put the modern

programs, and to decide whether or not the TV comes on.

around them. Society’s modern materialistic expectations

of orders, and so did I. We were having fun, and Shawn was

The world that our Creator made for us is full of

loves to teach us what she has learned from the Bible at

finishing up our toast and juice. We take turns reading out

Before we eat, though, Shawn leads out in family