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Oh human beings! Oh the children of Adam! These are the

terms Allah has frequently used to refer to us with in His doubtless
Qur͛an. But most of all let us put into consideration the heaviest
term being none other than Oh you who believe!!! I feel what any
contemplating man has in mind that this is not an honour we can
have heads high on and let it go. We claim to own the title ͚those
who believe͛ just like the sahabas of the prophet did own it and
their followers after them. The big question arises, are we those
who believe the same as those who believed? Aren͛t people with
the same title supposed to play the same roles? Where does the
difference crop up? Eventually, we are left wondering, so who are
the believers and how are believers supposed to be? It dawns on
my mind a nasheed which says ͞We look for stories of love in
places dark and cold, when we have a guiding light for the whole
world to behold.͟ Words which leave me trembling thinking of this
fact which is irrefutable. Examples have been set before us
centuries before and we still cling to emerging issues set by our
known enemies. Brothers and sisters, where is the lie, where is the
truth?

It is Allah who has placed the existence of families as a gift

and comfort to the heart to each and every one of us. Behind this
family lies a lot, from it grows a lot and to it we do a lot. When I
say a lot I mean what the world can bear. Believe it or not, this
family is the sole founder of those proceedings. One may always
wonder if for Muslims there are various ways which a family can
come into existence. It is that we are to call each other boyfriend
and girlfriend for a number of years before doing what is right
which is marriage? Or is it the system of ͚come we stay͛ for years
where we stay as husband and wife illegally before really
becoming husband and wife? So what wrong has been done by
those who simply marry and begin the new chapter of life? My
fellow Muslims, Allah says in Surah Ar-Rum ayah 21 (And among
His signs is that He has created for you wives from among
yourselves that you may find repose in them, and He has put
between you affection and mercy. Verily, in that are indeed signs
for people who reflect.) Allah has said wives and nothing like
girlfriends or boyfriends. Involving ourselves in pre-marital
relationship is zinaa and it leads to the unstable marriages we are
suffering.

This is what the words we mentioned previously were

pointing to. We look for stories of love from the western who are
our open enemies with various plans of destroying us and leaving
the best examples of the prophet and his sahabas. It is the western
that tell us to know each other before marrying each other but
where has our reliance on Allah gone to? Misled by satan͛s fake
feelings of love we end up moving proudly into the hole. If the
western͛s life style is the trend we should follow, ask yourself why
is divorce rate increasing every now and then? Why aren͛t people
happy in their marriages? Why are families no longer heaven but
hellfire to hearts? Our marriages are lasting months, weeks or
unfortunately even days. Couples during the prophet͛s reign
onwards buried each other in love and passion and still prayed to
meet in heaven. Oncoming generations did the same down to our
grandparents and parents. Why is this chaotic generation trying to
be unique even when no success is showing up? Once again, where
is the lie, where is the truth?
 As if not enough, we let the relationships exist and claim
them to be successful at the instance of marriage. Beware! You
may travel all the way to marriage with that ͚boyfriend͛ or
͚girlfriend͛ of yours but you never know what Allah has planned for
you after the marriage that you force to be. Allah has a set destiny
for each human being so fear your day and better your days! Well,
let us see how these couple comes into being. How is this great
ceremony done and what are its contents? Many will agree with
me that our ceremonies leave a lot to desire and for one who is
really struck by this on goings combines pity and despair. Since
when were our weddings adorned by disrespectful music,
undignified dressing styles, intermingling of men and women and
even wastage of food, dresses and all the things used to make the
wedding a classic one? When are we going to consider this a heavy
issue and avoid doing matters which will cost you your life?
Remember, similar positions have similar roles. Ask yourself; are
we, who believe, taking after those who believed?

We live in these families; we laugh, entertain ourselves, and

spend time together and everything to make it a wonderful place
to exist. What is the secret behind all these? It pities me to say that
most fathers are ensuring full time provision for their families
through illegal businesses let alone gambling, banking with
interest, name it. Our Qur͛an says heavy words from our Lord in
surat at-talaq, ͞And the one who fears Allah, He will put a way out
for him. And He will provide him from sources he would never
imagine. And whosoever puts his trust in Allah. Then He will suffice
him. Verily Allah will accomplish his purpose. Indeed Allah has set
a measure for all things.͟ Subhanallah! If each and every human
being put these words into consideration we would absolutely
have no fear, worry and discontent in our hearts. If each and every
human being put these words into consideration, Allah would do
as He promised. He would provide us abundantly more than we
expect more than we work for and even beyond our desires. Our
bread winners are obliged to inspire themselves and revive the
real them and the exact picture of what they are supposed to be.

Many have said and they keep on saying that behind every
successful man there is a woman. This has been proven right
centuries ago and was continuously proving to be right till this
generation the so called unique one started pushing its way out.
Mothers to hold this pride are very scarce. Respect for husbands
has disappeared just at the time when men and women are
pointing fingers at each other claiming a two way treatment when
neither of them is ready to practise it. The trend has been, ͚what is
the exact importance of me being under his orders when I͛m a
grown up?͛ No more assistance she offers, no advice, no more
consolation, she remains just inactive in the house and a real
bother for the husband. My mothers and future wives, where are
the several Khadijas bint Khuwailid that we long to see and be
proud of?

No doubt, the problem is a serious one and let us see why

pointing fingers is nowhere from stopping. Wives have left house
assistants to serve their own husbands in a very disorganized
manner in return the husband loses his closeness with his wife. To
rebel him, the wife disobeys him and portrays all sorts of violence.
In return the husband lessens his financial provision to the house.
Chaos takes over. Children as a result misbehave; girls abandon
their hijabs, boys retire to stealing, girls in relationships, boys in
drug abuse, girls impregmented, boys jailed and both of them end
up miles away from Islamic principles and have slight differences
with our enemies. Regret strikes the parents leaving the mother
saying ͚It was not my only responsibility, what about the father?͛
and the father replies ͚I had no time with them, what did the
mother do with them at home?͛

This is only one house which has gone into this damage.
Think how many families have undergone this and how many
societies have been destroyed completely. Problems are far
beyond mentioning them on paper. We are living not even
knowing our destiny and sorry to say, all this originates from the
confusion and competition between mothers and fathers. Fathers
want mothers to be like Khadija and mothers want them in return
to try being like the prophet. If each one does not try where will
the mutual treatment exist? If khadija bint khuwailid is required
then the one requiring has to first take after the prophet and vice
versa.

Brothers and sisters in Islam, we have a great task ahead to

carry out. Change has to be in me and you. Examples, Infact the
best examples have been set so we have where to turn to. Time
change is not an excuse because time is just moving and the world
is at a standstill. The only ones changing is us so we should adjust
our changing style and ensure it is still in line with religion. It is
high time we say no to what our enemies have in store for us.
There is a hard day awaiting us ahead so let us fear it. Let us know
all the fundamentals and abide by them. If we really work for a
better tomorrow, Allah will put the best success we can ever
imagine in our future lives and the hereafter. ͞Surely, Allah does
not change what is within a group of people until they change
what is within their hearts.͟ QUR͛AN.

Ô

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