Communicate With Power

Brian Tracy Teleseminar Notes

July 26, 2004

Introduction

Fully 85% of your success in all areas of your life will be determined by your
ability to communicate effectively with others. Everything you accomplish will be
associated with other people in some way. And people account for 85% of your
happiness and your results.

The quality of your communications therefore determines the quality of your life.
It determines the quality of your relationships, of all kinds.

The good news is that communicating is a skill that you can learn with practice.

Here are the “Big 5” of goals that you want to accomplish in your interactions with
others:

1. You want people to like and respect you, to reinforce and validate your
self-image.

2. You want people to feel that you are valuable and important, to build your
self-esteem and feelings of worthiness.

3. You want to be able to persuade people to your point of view, to sell your
products, services and ideas to others.

4. You want to get people to change their minds and to cooperate with you in
achieving your goals.

5. Overall, you want to be more personally powerful and effective in all your
relationships, personal and business.

These are the keys to success in leadership, life and love.

Some years ago, Daniel Goleman wrote the book Emotional Intelligence. He
argued that “’EQ’ is more important than ‘IQ.’”

His conclusion was that your ability to persuade others is the highest form of
emotional intelligence and the true measure of how effective you are as a
person.

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form for any purpose without the written permission of Brian Tracy.
The question is: How do you get your ideas across to others, get people to
cooperate with you, and develop the abilities to communicate, influence and
persuade others?

1. People do things for their reasons, not yours. To communicate and

persuade effectively, you must find out what their “motives” really are.

2. The key is to get out of yourself and get into the mind, heart and situation
of the other person. Focus on the needs and desires of the other person,
rather than your own.

3. You can only persuade and influence others if they believe that you can
do something for them, or to them. Or if they believe that you can stop
something being done to or for them.

People are motivated by two major factors:

a) Desire for gain – physical, material, financial and emotional.

b) Fear of loss – physical, material, financial and emotional.

Rule: the fear of loss is 2.5 times more powerful than the desire for gain in
motivating human behavior.

Everything is perception; how people perceive you as being able to help them or
hurt them in some way.

All of human behavior is based on the “Expediency-Factor” – the factor of

expediency in human behavior.

Rule: people always strive to get the things they want the fastest and easiest way
possible, with little immediate concern for the long-term consequences of their
behaviors.

Your job is to make your idea or proposal appear to be the most expedient way
for the other person to achieve their personal and business goals.

Four P’s

The Four P’s are the four keys to persuasion that you can develop and use.

1. Personal Power – the more people see you as having power over people,
money or resources, the more open they are to being persuaded by you.

2. Positioning – how people think and talk about you, your reputation
amongst people you are trying to persuade.

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form for any purpose without the written permission of Brian Tracy.
3. Performance – your ability and competence in your field, having a
reputation for expertise and knowledge.

4. Politeness – the use of kindness, courtesy and respect in all your

dealings with other people.

The deepest need that each person has is for a feeling of importance and value.

The most powerful influence factor in psychology is “Liking.” The more people
like you, the more open they are to being persuaded and influenced by you. This
is the key to effective communication.

Five A’s

The key to the Five A’s is to make people feel important.

1. Acceptance – satisfies a deep subconscious need. Smile, be friendly and

accepting of each person you meet.

2. Appreciation – say “Thank you” for everything people do for you, large
and small.

3. Admiration – express sincere compliments on the traits,

accomplishments and possessions of other people.

4. Approval – give praise for both small and large accomplishments. Key
point: be specific with your praise, and be immediate. Praise delayed or
referred has little effect on the emotions and behavior of another person.

5. Attention – listening to people when the talk.

Each one of these behaviors raises the self-esteem of the other person, makes
them more open to your ideas and more desirous of helping you achieve your
goals.

Effective listening is the key to leadership, persuasion and good communications.

It is so powerful that it is called “White Magic.”

Four Keys to Being a Great Listener:

1. Listen attentively, lean forward, no interruptions – when you listen

attentively, you raise the other persons self-esteem and make them feel
important.

2. Pause before replying – this benefits you in three ways:

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form for any purpose without the written permission of Brian Tracy.
 a) You avoid the risk of interrupting;

b) It allows you to hear at a deeper level.

c) Pausing tells the person you consider his or her words to be

important.

3. Question for clarification – never assume that you know what the other
person meant by what he or she said.

“How do you mean?”

“And then what did you do?”

“How did you feel about that?”

Rule: the person who asks questions has control over the person who is
answering the questions.

4. Feed it back, paraphrase it in your own words. This is the “acid test” of
listening.

Aristotle’s Rhetoric, the Three Parts of Any Communication:

1. Ethos – the character of the person speaking.

2. Pathos – the emotions that you address in your audience.

3. Logos – the words you use (least important!).

UCLA Study into Communication (Albert Mehrabian):

1. Body language – 55% of the message.

2. Tone of voice – 38% of the message.

3. The words themselves – only 7% of the message! People believe the

dominant message.

Four Personality Styles – Determined by Two Scales:

1. Introvert (self-contained) vs. Extrovert (expressive).

2. People oriented (emotional) vs. Task oriented (practical).

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form for any purpose without the written permission of Brian Tracy.
 • Relater personality – is both introverted and people oriented. This
type of personality is sensitive, slow, careful to make decisions and
most motivated by getting along well with others. They need to be
liked, understood and supported.

• Analyzer personality – is introverted and task-oriented. Their

primary motivation is “accuracy.” They are careful about details and
like to double-check everything. They are found in accounting,
engineering and computer programming.

• Director personality – is outgoing and task-oriented. This makes

him/her impatient, practical, bottom-line and task-oriented. Their
primary concern is for “results.” You must get to the point quickly
with these people.

• Socializer personality – is outgoing and people oriented. They love

to talk about you and about themselves. They are friendly,
expressive, warm and agreeable. They make good managers and
executives, but they are often forgetful about details and
agreements.

Key: flexibility rather than treating everyone the way you are is the key to dealing
with different personalities.

Method: ask questions, listen, look for clues to indicate what kind of a personality
you are dealing with. Speed up or slow down to synchronize your words and
behaviors with the person you are talking to.

The most important word in persuasion, influence and communicating with power
is CREDIBILITY.

Question: how much does the person like you, trust you and believe in what you
say?

Rule: “Everything Counts!”

Everything helps or hurts, adds up or takes away from your credibility. Nothing is
overlooked or ignored.

The key to being trusted is to be trustworthy. Keep your promises. Do what you
say you will do. Be punctual for every meeting.

Concentrate on developing a reputation for honesty and dependability. People

will buy more and pay more from a company that is reliable than one that offers a
better, cheaper product or service but is not reliable.

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form for any purpose without the written permission of Brian Tracy.
 To communicate effectively with others, you must “look the part.” People
are 95% visual in their thinking about you.

1. It takes only four seconds to make the first impression.

2. It takes only 30 seconds to finalize the person’s impression of you.

3. After the first impression has solidified, the person seeks reasons to justify
and validate the impression they have already made. Simultaneously, they
reject all counter information.

4. Dress for success! Your clothes are 95% of your first communication to
others, because they cover 95% of your body.

a) Get and read books and articles on how to dress successfully in

whatever business or occupation you are in.

b) Look at the most successful and respected people around you.

c) Make them your role models; copy their ways of dress and
grooming.

5. Preparation is a powerful way to communicate and build credibility, before every

meeting; do your homework!

a) People know immediately when you are well prepared for a

meeting. Your credibility goes straight up!

b) People know immediately when you are unprepared for a meeting;

your credibility goes straight down.

There are three business tools that you must master for success:

1. The one-on-one conversation – asking questions, listening, and

presenting your ideas.

2. The presentation before a group – requiring thorough preparation and

good presentation skills.

3. The written letter or report – can make you or break you in business
situations.

Good news? Each of these is a skill that is learnable by practice and repetition.

To give an effective presentation, there are five key steps:

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form for any purpose without the written permission of Brian Tracy.
1. Prepare thoroughly in advance; effective presentation is 90% preparation.

2. Point-of-view – state your idea or goal clearly at the beginning of your

presentation.

3. Give the reasons you have for your point-of-view.

4. And give evidence for your reasons.

5. Restate your point-of-view once more and call for action.

The Traditional Speech Outline

1. Tell them what you are going to tell them.

2. Tell them your message.

3. Tell them what you just told them, summarize your key points and ask for
action.

How to Interview For Any Job

1. Do your homework on the company or organization. Use the Internet.

Prepare thoroughly.

2. In the interview, ask prepared questions about the company, the person
interviewing you, the job and the future. (“The person who asks questions
has control.”).

3. Practice all your listening skills as talked about earlier during the interview.

To influence people in business, always refer back to the “Expediency Principle.”

In business especially, people buy or decline to buy based on their conclusion
that your offering is the fastest and best way to get what they want, right now – or
not!

1. Liking is the most important factor in communicating effectively in

business.

2. Credibility and trust are the most powerful reasons for being persuaded by
another person.

3. Social proof – refer to others who have accepted your idea or product and
who are happy with it; use letters, lists, names and photographs.

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form for any purpose without the written permission of Brian Tracy.
4. You build buying desire by focusing on the benefits, and by answering the
question, “What’s in it for me?”

a) Explain how the person will be better off using your product or
service.

b) Imply scarcity – you often increase-buying desire by suggesting

that there is a limited quantity or a limited quantity at that price.

c) The “Contrast Principle.” Contrast the price of your item with a

similar item that is substantially more expensive. This puts your
price into perspective and often makes the sale.

5. Ask them to buy your product or service; don’t wait for them to offer.

6. Promise them superb quality and excellent follow-up service.

There are several differences between men and women in communicating,

persuading and influencing:

1. Men are direct, women are indirect.

2. Men want a recommendation; women prefer to choose from a selection of

available items.

3. Men use words as tools, to do a job; women use words to connect,

nurture, build relationships.

4. Men like to make quick, practical decisions; women prefer to listen to their
emotions.

5. Men are motivated by success, status, power, results and achievement;

women are more concerned with family, children, friends and
relationships.

6. Men like to talk about sports, business and politics; women prefer to talk
about people, relationships and emotions.

7. Men can only focus on one thing, one sense at a time; women can both
talk and listen, interact and do other things simultaneously.

To get along better with women, men need to ask more questions, listen
more attentively, offer fewer suggestions or solutions.

To get along better with men, women need to be more direct, to be clear
about what they want, to ask for help or involvement.

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form for any purpose without the written permission of Brian Tracy.
 • Men cannot read minds; women can.

• Men do not think a lot about relationships, communications; women

think a lot about them.

• Men have very simple inner lives and women are much more
complex.

Resolve today to become an expert in Communicating With Power. Read books

on the subject. Attend courses on effective communications. Listen to the audio
programs with this Teleseminar. Most of all, practice, practice, practice!

© Brian Tracy. All rights reserved. The contents, or parts thereof, may not be reproduced in any
form for any purpose without the written permission of Brian Tracy.