Jenna Engelbert

Professor Fielding

WRTC103

January 21, 2019

On My Own

There is one constant that hasn’t changed much in society despite numerous changes in

history; women and their roles in everyday life. “Girls were found to spend more time overall

than boys in the areas of shopping, house cleaning, food preparation, dishwashing, clothing care,

and clothing construction”(Blair). Here, the stereotype of a woman’s job being in the kitchen

while the man of the house went out into society with a real job and money is represented.

Regardless of women’s attempts to be seen as equals in all aspects of life, this stereotype

remains. Even in my own life, due to cultural and societal norms, I was pushed into taking on all

the domestic work while my twin brother holds little to no responsibility in the family. I feel as

though I was given more work and more stressful responsibilities because of my gender. Within

my childhood, my brother was treated differently and given different tasks despite our identical

upbringing, education, and age.

Historically in traditional American households, the women of the house take care of all the

housework. “Girls were considerably more likely to clean the house, work in the kitchen, and

babysit their younger siblings. Boys, on the other hand, were more likely to perform outside

chores and taking out garbage”(Blair). This is shown further through distribution of chores

between daughters and sons. Girls, on average, have double the number of hours of chores than

boys; which seems not only unfair but discriminatory. When I was young, chores were done

together and were of the same substance: washing dishes, cleaning rooms, and raking leaves.
After a certain point, these got divided up between the two of us; “gender role stereotyping by

parents tends to increase with age”(Blair). No coincidence that I was stuck inside cleaning up

after everyone else while my brother dealt with natures messes. I strangely found myself jealous

that he got to rake the leaves and shovel the snow. Being the only female in a house full of boys

made me feel as if I were at a disadvantage, my end of the scale kept being thrown new tasks

while my brothers stayed the same. This is when I saw that these chores were not only becoming

my entire life but left me feeling trapped in my own house.

While my home work load continued to build, that

didn’t stop other aspects of my life from piling up as

well; school, work, and a social life kept me very busy

every minute of the day. Most seventeen-year-olds

wouldn’t know how to balance these many

responsibilities, but my extenuating circumstances of

helping out my single parent, taught me how to do it

all. One thing I was not prepared for was the most
stressful time of the year shoved into my already busy
schedule. I was already aware the first Christmas after
being left with a house full of boys would be difficult,
Picture Taken: 01/20/2019 4:38pm
This photo represents what my thoughts looked like
during this time in my life. I was trapped in my
bedroom prioritizing, dreaming that I could do
something I wanted to do like hanging out with
friends and family. Before quickly realizing that my
priorities weren’t up to me, I had to do what needed
to be done, not what I really wanted to do.

but I didn’t realize how much my dad relied on me. Not for not just little day to day things, but

for all tasks once taken care of by my mom. I accepted these with open arms knowing it was the

best thing I could do to keep my family feeling as normal as possible. I couldn’t help but notice

my Christmas bonus what much different than those of my three brothers, especially my twin.
 As Christmas was quickly approaching, I reached out to my brother for help as I tackled the

entire holiday season alone. He immediately declines because “shopping is not something he

does” and “he wouldn’t know what to do.” He implied that I knew exactly what I was doing

which was the opposite of true and as if shopping for others was my purpose in life. I just wanted

a little help, even if it was just moral support. When you go through life together, just his

presence would’ve made me more secure in what I was doing. In annoyance, I brought the

predicament to my dad, hoping he’d see me drowning and ask my brother to help me stay afloat.

To my disappointment, I was left alone with a long list of “to do’s” and not much help. I yelled

at the both of them for failing to see what I had on my plate, I couldn’t believe that all of this was

asked of me; shopping, baking, decorating, and my brother simply had to help shovel the snow

and put up exterior lights. Nonetheless, he split these tasks among the four men living under the

same roof as me. All of my errands should have been fun holiday experience, but suddenly a

once joyous time of year had become a nightmare.

After this incident, I was amazed at the division of labor in my house. I hated feeling like my

own parent and always doing things for other people, I wanted to be in charge of just my own

life. I felt alienated from the rest of my family; while they were relaxing on the weekends, I was

constantly running errands and fulfilling tasks that were asked of me. However, I learned a lot

about myself and adult responsibilities from my quick transition from teenage girl to mom of the

house. I think these circumstances prepared me well for my upcoming, now current, life away

from home. Even when things were very hard for me, I knew I was helping my family in an

irreplaceable way that made it worth all the headaches. I could tell that by me taking on all the

tasks my mom used to do, especially around the holidays, it comforted my dad and my brothers

that things felt familiar. I found strength to keep a house together while everything is telling it to
fall apart. I saw the life that I’m living now, doesn’t have to be my life forever. I am excited to

say that I am looking forward to a future where I get my own list of chores, where I get to have a

job, and when I can rake the leaves.

Works Cited

 “Gender Role | Definition of Gender Role in English by Oxford Dictionaries.” Oxford

Dictionaries | English, Oxford Dictionaries,
en.oxforddictionaries.com/definition/gender_role.
 Blair, S. L. (1992). The sex-typing of children's household labor: Parental influence on
daughters' and sons' housework. Youth and Society, 24(2), 178. Retrieved from
https://search.proquest.com/docview/1295944308?accountid=11667
 Drake, C.E., Primeaux, S. & Thomas, J. Gend. Issues (2018) 35: 3.
https://doi.org/10.1007/s12147-017-9189-6