Healing Hands

Jacob's POV

Prologue

"Jacob."

I turned away from the mirror where I'd been adjusting my tie to look at my 13-
year-old god-daughter Renesmee. She was the image of her father with the
exception of her warm chocolate brown eyes…Bella's eyes.

I felt the familiar ache that I always did when I thought of Bella, my ex-
girlfriend.

"Nessie, what are you doing here?" I asked in surprise. I was 10 minutes away
from getting married to Leah Clearwater. I turned back to look into the mirror
as I eyed my tux one more time.

"Jacob…please don't marry Leah," Ness's voice interrupted my inspection.

I looked over at her with a frown. Nessie's eyes were filled with tears. I quickly
walked over to her and cupped the side of her face. I'd always been close to
Renesmee. From the moment she was born, I'd watched over her and
protected her. I loved Bella with all my heart and soul. As Ness was an
extension of Bella, I made sure that she never had a care in the world. Edward
told me on numerous occasions that I was spoiling his daughter, but I knew
that was impossible. Ness was one of the most selfless, caring people I'd ever
met…even if she was just a kid.

"Ness, what's got you so upset?" I asked in concern.

"You're making a mistake," Ness suddenly said. "You don't love Leah."

My stomach twisted painfully at her words. Did I love Leah as I loved Bella? No.
I had been in love with Bella for over half my life, from the moment she moved
to Forks when she was 12 and I was 10. We had become instant best friends.
She'd been my first kiss…my first girlfriend. Of course, as soon as Edward
Cullen moved into town that all changed. Edward swept Bella off her feet. He
was rich, sophisticated, and I'd never stood a chance.

Bella broke up with me and began dating Edward their senior year. We'd
miraculously remained friends, and I'd even sucked it up and become amicable
towards Edward. I'd rather have had Bella as a friend than not have her in my
life at all. When Bella and Edward had turned 18, they'd gotten married and a
year later, my god-daughter was born.
I swallowed as I met Nessie's unrelenting stare. "Why don't you think I love
Leah?"

"You're only marrying her because she's pregnant," Ness stated firmly.

My hands began to shake in anger. I had told Bella that fact in confidence. How
could she discuss that with anyone, especially her impressionable daughter?

"That's none of your business, Renesmee," I snapped and felt instantly

ashamed as tears streamed down her cheeks.

"So it's true?" Nessie whispered. "I overheard Mom talking to you about it on
the phone but I…I wasn't s-sure."

I sighed before grabbing her hand and pulling her over to the couch that was
set up in the room. How did you explain to a 13-year-old girl about facing the
consequences of your actions? If Bella hadn't told me that she and Edward
were expecting another baby after trying for so many years, I probably
wouldn't have slept with Leah that night. But Leah had been my friend for
years…even longer than Bella and I had been. She'd just found out that her ex-
boyfriend had gotten engaged to her cousin and we'd turned to each other in
comfort. Now, I was doing what I felt was best to rectify the situation. I was
going to marry the mother of my child. Since I knew I'd never love anyone as
much as I loved Bella anyway, why not do the responsible thing and do right by
Leah?

"Yes, Leah is pregnant," I admitted.

"But Jake…you don't have to marry her! That idea is so outdated!" Ness
insisted.

"Maybe it is…but Ness, I'm 30-years-old. I've always wanted a family and this is
my chance. I know given the circumstances, it doesn't seem like I love Leah,
but I do," I told her and watched her flinch. I continued gently, "Maybe it's not
with all the fire and passion I thought I would have with my wife, but Leah and I
have been good friends for a long time. We've talked this over at length, and
we both want this."

There was a knock on the door and I heard Leah's brother Seth call out, "Jake,
it's time. Are you ready?"

"Yeah, I'll be right there," I returned, standing up.

Nessie stood up too and grabbed my hand, halting me when I went to walk
away.

"Jake, please…" Steady tears continued to run down her face. "I…I have
something I need to tell you…"
I looked at the door and then back down at my god-daughter. "Can it wait?"

She instantly shook her head before swallowing. "J-Jake…I'm begging you.
Please don't marry her. W-wait for me to grow up. I love you, Jacob."

My heart turned tenderly as I stared down at my beautiful, brave girl. Leaning

down, I kissed her gently on the forehead and pulled away. Her eyes were
closed as tears seeped out from behind her closed lids.

"Nessie," I said softly, grasping her chin lightly. When she opened her liquid
brown eyes, I told her, "Someday…you're going to make some guy a very lucky
man."

Defeat and heartbreak filled her expression. Pulling away from me, she turned
and went to look out the room's window. I could hear music begin to play in the
church. Looking back at Ness one more time, I turned and headed towards the
door.

Just as my hand reached the doorknob, Nessie spoke up.

"You'll regret it, Jacob," she told me in a voice that was suddenly wise beyond
her years. "Someday, you'll look back on this day and wish you'd listened to
me."

I stared at her, trying to think of something to say to make her understand. I

felt for her. I'd been in her exact position when Bella married Edward 14 years
ago.

"I'm sorry, Ness," was all I could get out, before opening the door to face my
future.

Chapter 1 – My Angel

Nine Years Later

Pain. Every single molecule in my body was screaming out in excruciating pain.
What the fuck happened? One minute I was riding my motorcycle and then…

"Mr. Black? Can you hear me?" An unfamiliar voice asked.

I tried to answer, but I couldn't open my mouth. I felt like I was drowning. All I
could taste was blood. Something was shoved down my throat making me want
to gag, but I was suddenly, blessedly able to breathe again. My eyelids were
shoved open as a light was flashed into my eyes.

People were asking me questions, but I couldn't respond. I wasn't able to move
at all, which was beginning to fill me with blind panic. I could hear one
authoritative voice order that I be given a sedative and soon after that
welcoming darkness overtook me.

From there on out, I was in and out of consciousness. I thought I recognized my

sister Rachel's voice and her husband Paul's. Another time, I heard Leah mutter
something about how she couldn't handle living with a "cripple." A cripple?
What the fuck was she talking about?

Every time I tried to speak, I found that I couldn't muster up the energy to form
a single word, let alone ask the questions that were torturing my confused,
exhausted brain. At one point, I heard someone crying softly next to my bed. I
was conscious enough to realize that they were touching me. One soft hand
was holding mine…it felt so delicate and tiny. The other was running soothingly
through my hair. It felt good. The sobbing tore at my heart though. I wanted to
comfort the person. When I was unable to, I internally began screaming in
frustration. What was wrong with me?

"Jacob, please keep fighting," an achingly familiar voice said. "I need you so
much…I-I'm not ready for you to leave yet."

Concentrating with every ounce of strength I had, I finally whispered, "Bella."

The caressing hands suddenly disappeared. I groaned and this time, I heard it
echo around the room. I tried to turn my head but couldn't. I didn't want her to
go away…my angel. The room was suddenly filled with activity.

"It looks like he's coming around," a male voice said. I moaned again. I didn't
want that voice. I wanted the one who'd just been speaking to me…my angel.

"Jacob, my name is Dr. Carver. Can you hear me?"

"Mmhmm."

"You gave us quite a scare," the doctor said. "Do you remember what
happened?"

I felt myself frown as I tried to focus. I couldn't remember a thing at first and
then fuzzy memories began to filter through my mind. I remembered fighting
with Leah…again. I was upset because it was the anniversary of our son's
death, and she'd wanted to go to some party.

That was the problem about having a ton of money. There was always some
place we had to be seen. I had stated, yet again, that I wanted a divorce and
Leah had just laughed. I'd gone for a ride on my Harley to cool down when a
car suddenly went through a red light and-"

"Accident," I finally answered.

"That's right," Dr. Carver responded. "You've been in a coma for the past two
weeks. However, your vitals are looking good."

I opened my eyes and found myself looking into the elderly face of the man
speaking to me. I glanced around the room and saw a couple of nurses working
over me. I also saw Rachel and Paul standing on the opposite side of the room.
I didn't see anyone else. Uncontrollable anger began to swell inside me. Where
was she?

"Angel," I murmured.

"What angel, Jake?" My sister asked, looking worriedly at the doctor. He just
shook his grayish brown head.

I sighed and repeated, "Angel."

"It's just us," Rachel said, trying not to sound as frightened as she looked.

"You know…why don't you just try to relax, Jacob?" Dr. Carver insisted, his blue
eyes looking at me intently as the nurse standing next to my bed injected
something into my IV. My eyes rolled in my head and I was out again.

Over the next few days, my room became a flurry of activity. Rachel came to
visit me every day. Even my other sister, Rebecca, flew in from Hawaii and
spent a couple of days with me. The three of us were all that was left of our
family. Our mother had died from cancer when I was still a teenager, and our
father had passed away the year before from a heart attack. I really wished he
was here right now. I could have used his wisdom to get me through what I was
dealing with.

Aside from a concussion, broken arm, and collapsed lung, we also found out
that I'd been paralyzed from the waist down. The doctors told me that there
was a possibility it was temporary. A body scan showed that I hadn't severed
my spinal cord when I flipped off my bike, but there was massive swelling
throughout my back. I was able to move my upper body, but my lower half was
useless dead weight.

I tried to keep my spirits up, but it was hard. What if I remained paralyzed
when the swelling went down? Evidently my beloved wife wondered the same
thing. About a week after I had woken up, Leah finally made an appearance.

"Here," she said, handing me an envelope.

"What's this?" I asked, not even bothering to open it.

"I've decided you were right," Leah said, pulling out a cigarette from her purse.
"Leah, you can't smoke that in here," I reminded her. Sighing, she put the unlit
cigarette back, and ran her hands through her expertly dyed hair.

"Look Jacob, this marriage was a mistake. If I hadn't gotten pregnant, you
wouldn't have married me in the first place. I think it's time we both accept
that what we had is over."

Ironic. I'd been telling her that for months…hell, for years, but she would never
hear it. We were part of high class society…the toast of Seattle. Leah refused
to lose her throne as one of the wealthiest socialites in the state of
Washington. I could understand her insecurities in some ways. We'd both
grown up poor on the reservation. I'd worked my ass off to build my empire,
and Leah had been the perfect trophy wife. But it was an empty existence.

As I glanced at her, I tried to remember that we had been friends at one time. I
had even convinced myself during the early years of our marriage that I was in
love with her. But when I looked at her now, all I could feel was disgust and
anger. Sometimes I thought she was glad that our son died. He would have
interfered too much with her social life. I should have never married her. If
there were ever two people more incompatible for each other, it was Leah and
me.

"So why the divorce now?" I asked her, before waving at my motionless lower
body. "Is it because of this?"

"Jacob, I'm sorry," Leah said, holding her chin up in a way that emphasized her
plastic surgeon's excellent work. "I'm not good with this."

She nodded in the direction of my body, but wouldn't look at it. It was as if I'd
suddenly grown scales and a tail. I couldn't really say I blamed her. If I could
escape from myself, I would too.

"Fine," I sighed, closing my eyes to block her out. I was trying very hard not to
lose my temper. It seemed that I was always ready to lash out anymore.

"You'll recover Jake…I just know it," Leah tried to assure me, but it was half
hearted at best.

"Just go," I responded through gritted teeth.

I heard the taps of her heels on the linoleum grow distant. I opened my eyes
again to stare at the wall. So what now? I was a soon-to-be wifeless cripple.
Before I could wallow any further in self-pity and depression, my door opened
and Bella and Edward Cullen walked in. My heart did its familiar tug of longing
as I looked at Bella.
Even at 41, she was just as beautiful to me as she'd been when we were
teenagers. Her hair was still a rich dark brown. She normally wore it just past
her shoulders, but today she had it back in some kind of twist. There were lines
around her mouth and eyes, but they only defined her features in a good way.
To me, she was even more desirable than she'd been 20 years ago.

"Jacob, hey," she said as she approached me, giving me a hug. I tried not to
dwell on her familiar, incredible scent.

"Hey Bells," I murmured.

"I'm so sorry we weren't here for you earlier. We just got back from taking
Oliver to Disneyworld in Florida."

My stomach lurched as I thought about Edward and Bella's son, Oliver. My son
would have been about the same age as Ollie, but my son had been stillborn.
He'd been beautiful though, with dark hair and perfect features. My little J.J.

"How was the trip?" I asked casually, trying not to dwell on the past.

"It was good, Jacob," Edward spoke up for the first time. "Ollie had a blast."

He looked at me in sympathy. I had a feeling it was because he saw some of

the torment on my face, rather than any pity he felt towards my present
condition. Edward had always been very good at reading people. I was pretty
sure he knew that I had never gotten over Bella.

Pulling my thoughts away from that dangerous path, I wondered, "What about
Nessie? Did she have fun?"

My relationship with my god-daughter had grown strained over the years. At

one time, I'd been closer to her than anyone. After my marriage to Leah, Ness
had avoided me at all costs.

"She didn't go with us," Bella spoke up. "She's studying for her exams right
now."

"I'm surprised she didn't come and see you," Edward said with a frown.

Truth be told, I was too. Even with our differences, I couldn't believe Nessie was
so unfeeling towards me that she wouldn't come and visit. She lived and
attended school in Seattle, for Christ's sake. She probably lived only a few
minutes from the hospital. I took a deep breath as I forced myself to rein in my
temper again.

"It sounds like she's pretty busy right now," I replied through gritted teeth,
trying not to show my hurt.
"It's probably that guy she's involved with," Bella said disdainfully.

Edward chuckled. "He's pre-med Bella. I don't think he's out to corrupt any
souls."

"He's not good enough for our daughter," Bella remarked.

"Well, who is though?" I tried to joke.

"Who is indeed," Bella murmured, her eyes lingering briefly on my face before
she turned to her husband. "We should probably get going."

"We're going to be staying with my sister and Jasper while we're here," Edward
told me. "Ollie's with them right now, in fact."

"Oh…okay," I replied, trying not to look too disappointed. They just got here
after all.

"We'll come see you tomorrow," Bella assured me. "And if I can track down that
daughter of mine, I'll make sure she comes to visit you too."

"Thanks Bells, I'd like that," I said, suddenly drained.

She leaned down and kissed my cheek. "You'll get through this Jacob. You're
one of the strongest people I know."

And with that, she and Edward left me alone with my thoughts. What was I
going to do with my life if I remained impaired? I really didn't need to work. I
had started off as a mechanic in a garage when I was a teen. By the time I was
20, I owned my own shop. When I reached 25, Edward's sister, Alice, talked me
into growing my business and buying another shop outside of Port Angeles. She
was an investor and convinced me that it would be a good idea. She also took
some money I gave her and put it into the stock market. Even in a recession,
she knew when to buy and when to sell. By the time I was 35, "Jacob's Garage"
was a successful chain throughout the state of Washington, and I was a
millionaire several times over. Now, I worked behind a desk…something I could
easily do at home. If there were complaints, I had well paid managers who
could handle them.

My thoughts turned to La Push. I was technically supposed to have inherited

the title of "Chief." It was my father's before me, but since I didn't live on the
reservation, I passed the title to my sister, Rachel. She was the first woman
chief in our tribal history and she excelled in the role. I hadn't forgotten my
roots though. I had donated plenty of money to the rez over the years, and the
people used it to make improvements. La Push was now building up a
reputation of being an "eco" tourist place to visit for bored suburbanites.
Maybe my next step in life would be to go back to La Push for awhile. I owned
property there. After donating a million dollars to the reservation, they had let
me build a green home that sat on the cliffs overlooking the ocean. It might be
just the place I needed to go to recuperate. And if my body didn't heal, then I
could always throw myself off the cliff…or should I say, roll myself off. I
chuckled at my own dark humor as I waited for Dr. Carver to make his rounds.
When he came to check on my progress, I told him my idea of returning home.

"I'm okay with that," the doctor replied hesitantly. "But you'll need to hire
someone to go with you. You're going to need assistance with your physical
therapy exercises. You'll also need to set up an appointment with the hospital
in Forks so that you'll continue to get monitored care."

"Okay," I replied, my spirits lifting for the first time since I'd regained
consciousness. The longing to go home was suddenly overwhelming. I told
Edward and Bella my plans when they came to visit me the next day.

"You know what," Bella said excitedly. "This is perfect. Nessie is training to be a
physical therapist. She's already certified as a physical therapy assistant. Her
summer break starts soon. I'm sure she'd be willing to help you if we asked."

I snorted. I was pretty sure given Ness's disdain for me that she'd sooner help
me off a cliff than assist me…how convenient that one would be so readily
available for her.

"What do you think, Edward?" Bella asked her husband.

"I'm not sure," Edward frowned.

Bella rolled her eyes. "C'mon Edward, it's not like Jake is going to seduce our
baby. He'll be the perfect gentleman, won't you Jake?"

"Yeah, there's no problem there. I can't seduce anyone right now," I reminded
them both.

"That's the thing…there's a possibility that you can," Edward replied, crossing
his arms over his chest.

I sometimes forgot that Edward was a doctor. Granted he was a psychologist,

but I was pretty sure he dealt with patients in my condition before. I also had
the humiliating feeling that he talked to his dad about my case. Carlisle was a
world renowned doctor who lived and worked out of Forks. I could just imagine
the two of them discussing my sex life.

"Well, Ness and Jacob are both adults," Bella told her husband dismissively.
"Besides, I trust Jake to do the right thing."
"Thanks Bells," I muttered, my cheeks burning. I eyed Edward who was still
looking at me suspiciously. "Look…even if Ness agreed to help me, which I
doubt she will, I can promise you I won't touch her. She's just a kid."

"She's not a kid. She's a 22-year-old woman," Edward reminded me. I was
actually a little startled to hear that. When had Nessie grown up?

"You still have nothing to worry about…she's my god-daughter, Edward. I don't

have any intention of seducing her. I'm too old for her anyway."

"You're 39. I don't think you're ready for the retirement home just yet," Edward
huffed.

"Edward, enough," Bella finally said in an exasperated tone. "If Ness can help
Jacob, then she's going to help him. I'd feel better knowing that Jake's being
cared for by someone he knows rather than some unfeeling stranger. I'm going
to call Renesmee right now."

Edward and I stared at each other uncomfortably before he broke away and
went over to glance out the window. Bella left the room to make her call. I was
left staring up at the ceiling, trying not to get too hopeful. I seriously doubted
Nessie would help me. I'd have to go through the hassle of finding and hiring
someone else, but at least I'd be back home.

Still…I really hoped it would be Ness that oversaw my care. Bella came back
about 10 minutes later. She had a satisfied smile on her face.

Renesmee had said yes.

Chapter 2 – No Pain, No Gain

Jacob's POV

"C'mon Mr. Black, just a couple more stretches," the blonde bitch of a physical
therapist instructed. I gritted my teeth as I twisted the exercise ball I was
holding from side to side. Who would have ever thought something so simple
could be so friggin painful. Aside from the pain killing my back, my broken arm
throbbed painfully in its cast.

"Don't be a slacker. We need to keep your upper body strong," Rosalie

remarked as she made notes on her clipboard.

"Fuck you," I snarled.

"Now, now, Mr. Black, that negative attitude is not going to help you any," she
said.
How the hell did I end up with her as a physical therapist? She had the face of
an angel, and the work ethic of a slave driver. I grunted as I continued with my
task. In the almost month since I'd been in the rehabilitation center, I had only
recovered slightly from my paralysis. I knew when I had to use the bathroom,
but I still had no sensation in my legs. I feared the worst. Most people who
suffered from temporary paralysis usually regained full sensation after two
weeks. I was going on three weeks and two days.

"Hey Mr. B, you're looking good today," Emmett, one of the other physical
therapists, said.

He went up to Rosalie and whispered something in her ear that made her
giggle before he moved onto his own patient. I was pretty sure they had
something going on. I just hoped they weren't having sex on the mats that I
was currently being tortured on.

"One more, Mr. Black," Rosalie insisted.

I rocked the ball from side to side again. My arm felt like it was being stabbed
by a thousand knives. My face broke into a sweat and finally having enough, I
chucked the ball across the room causing Rosalie to jump.

"God dammit!" I yelled as pain wracked my body.

"Aww…don't let him intimidate you, Rose," a feminine voice said.

My head whipped in the direction of the newcomer. Standing in the doorframe

was Renesmee. I hadn't seen her once in the entire time I was hospitalized. She
looked…different. Older. I was startled to realize that the last time I saw her
was two years ago at her 20th birthday party. Her bronzed curls were pulled
into a ponytail, which emphasized the alabaster completion of her skin. She
had minimal makeup on and was wearing yoga pants and a form fitting t-shirt
that had an employee badge attached to it. Yet, she looked…beautiful. And it
pissed me off.

"Where the hell have you been?" I snapped at the same time Rosalie said, "Hey
Nessie."

"Hey Rose. Sorry Jacob, I've been busy with school," Ness explained, not quite
meeting my eyes as she looked at my chart. "I stopped by to see you a couple
of times but you were always asleep."

"Do you know him?" Rosalie asked in a low tone.

"He's my godfather," Nessie replied.

"Oh…sorry," Rosalie whispered, giving an exaggerated wince which caused

Renesmee to smirk.
"Yeah, I'm right here, you know," I said waspishly. "Just because I'm a cripple
doesn't mean I still can't hear you."

"And you're in such a wonderful mood too," Ness remarked. "I'm sorry I wasn't
here earlier to enjoy your delightful company."

"I'm surprised you even thought to come visit me at all," I responded

petulantly.

Somewhere in the back of my head, I realized I was pouting like a little bitch,
but I couldn't seem to help myself. Ness realized it as well, because she just
rolled her eyes. She and Rosalie discussed my case for a few minutes before
Rosalie turned her attention back to me.

"Well, I think we're all finished here. Just think, one more week and you get to
go home."

"Can't wait," I muttered.

"Ness, could you take our patient back to his room?"

"Sure," Renesmee replied a little reluctantly which only made my temper rise
even more.

Emmett came over and helped me into my wheelchair. Once I was settled,
Renesmee started to push me. She began to speak to me as though I were an
acquaintance instead of someone who'd known her since the moment she was
born.

"Don't get used to all this assistance," she said in an impersonal tone. "Once
your arm is healed, then you're going to have to start pushing your own chair.
In fact, it might not be a bad idea to look into a motorized chair in the
meantime."

"If I'm such an inconvenience to you, maybe I should just hire someone else to
help me."

I heard Ness sigh behind me.

"Jacob, I know you're angry, but you will walk again. The fact that you've
gained some sensation in your lower region is an excellent sign. The body heals
differently for everyone. Even though statistically most people who are
temporarily paralyzed regain full mobility after two weeks, that's not always
the case for everyone. In school, I learned about a woman who didn't start
regain mobility until three months after her accident."
I didn't say anything, but I felt some of my anger drain away. Her words gave
me slight hope. I wasn't sure if that was a good or bad thing though. We soon
arrived at my room.

"Do you need help getting into your bed?" Ness asked.

I didn't, but since I was feeling slightly pissed off still, I decided to make her
work.

"Yeah."

Nessie looked at me suspiciously before reaching for my side. She slipped her
arm under mine and I was suddenly surrounded by her sweet, rose petal scent.
I could feel her chest pressed against me as she got ready to assist me into my
bed. I was ashamed to admit that I liked the feeling. If I turned my head just
slightly, our lips would be touching. That thought was quickly squashed as I
remembered that this was Nessie. I remembered Bella changing her diaper for
Christ's sake. And any strange new desire I was suddenly feeling for my god-
daughter was instantly forgotten as I remembered Bella's delicate features.

"Jake, are you okay?" Nessie asked. "You stiffened up."

"Yeah, I just want to get into bed, okay?" I said distantly.

"Of course," Nessie replied, equally as formal.

Once I got settled, I looked at Renesmee as she stared at a small pad of paper
she'd brought with her. She frowned as she made some notes. She was
effectively shutting me out and I didn't like it. A part of me mourned for the
easiness of our past relationship. Another part…the bitter, angry part that was
coming to the realization that I'd never walk again, wanted to lash out at
anything and anyone who got in my way.

"So why didn't you come to see me?" I asked peevishly.

"I told you," Renesmee said, as she put her notes away and sat in the chair
next to my bed. She pulled her legs up and wrapped her arms around them. "I
had school. Final exams were wrapping up."

"Are you all done then?" I wondered.

"For now," Ness replied. "I'm taking the summer off to help you, but I've still
got four more years to go."

"To become a physical therapist?" I said in surprise.

"I'm getting my doctorate." Ness shrugged.

"So what were your original plans for the summer?" I questioned.
Ness didn't say anything for a moment. She bit her lip before saying, "It doesn't
matter. This looks better on a resume anyway."

I didn't know why, but that idea really irritated me.

"Well, so glad that I could help you progress in your career," I sulked. I didn't
say anything, just folded my arms across my chest and stared at the TV screen
that wasn't even on. I heard Ness giggle and I looked over at her.

"What?"

"Nothing," Ness said, but she laughed again. I'd always found her laughter
contagious. I felt myself smiling back against my will. The expression felt
foreign to me.

"What's so funny?" I insisted on knowing.

"Well…you. When you pout, your lower lip sticks out a little. It's kind of cu…
err…funny."

"I'm glad I can amuse you," I retorted, making sure not to look so pouty. Ness,
aware of this, only laughed harder.

"Jake, I wanted to help you, okay?" Renesmee finally said. "And it's not because
of how it'll look on a resume. I'm sorry that I didn't come and see you as much
when you were first injured. I had a lot going on. But believe me when I say
that my mom's kept me updated on your condition, and I've also talked to your
doctor about your case several times."

"Okay," I said, feeling better knowing that she at least cared. I didn't even
question why I should feel relieved. "So what were your plans this summer?"

Ness sighed. "If you really want to know, I planned on going to Chile with my
boyfriend, Nahuel. His family is from there."

"Oh yeah…your mom told me a little bit about him."

"I'm sure she did," Ness grumbled. "Mom doesn't care for him too much."

"Your mother is an excellent judge of character."

Renesmee actually snorted. "Umm…that's debatable. But we'll save that for
another argument."

"So what did your boyfriend say when you canceled?" I asked curiously.

"He was disappointed. He's still leaving in a few days to go visit his parents for
a couple of weeks, but he'll be back for the remaining summer. He might come
and see me when I'm in Forks."
"Great," I murmured, deciding I didn't want to hear about Ness's boyfriend
anymore. "So you're planning on living at my house, right?"

"Oh…" Renesmee replied, her cheeks going red. "I wasn't…uh…I wasn't sure if
you would want me to or not. I was going to stay with my grandparents."

"My house is big enough for both of us and you shouldn't have to commute
everyday from Forks. Besides, it'd be nice to have some company."

I really didn't want to admit that. But I didn't want to be left alone with my own
thoughts too much either. The idea of Ness staying under the same roof as me
became more and more appealing. Still, Renesmee seemed hesitant.

"I know you and Leah are having some problems right now, but wouldn't she
object to you moving another woman into her house?"

"First off," I replied, taking in the reserved way Nessie was holding herself.
"Leah and I aren't just having some little spat. We're getting a divorce.
Secondly, the house in La Push was never Leah's. She never even set foot in it.
And third, I don't really care what Leah thinks. Last I heard, she was off in
Barbados with her personal trainer."

Ness looked at me sadly. "Jake, I'm really sorry that things didn't work out."

"Hey, you told me, right?" I shrugged indifferently. If Renesmee's cheeks were
red before, they were white now.

"I really should apologize for what I said back then. It was none of my
business."

"Ness, c'mon that was ages ago-"

"I know," she interrupted. "But I really want to say this, okay?"

I nodded.

"I had a bit of a crush on you when I was a kid. Coming in and bothering you
right before your wedding was inexcusable, and I'm sorry I did that to you.
Blame it on the emotions of a hormonal kid, all right?"

"Sure Ness," I said with a slight grin and she smiled back.

"Good, because I'd hate for you to think I meant any of what I said…especially
the part about being in love with you."

She said it with a smirk and I joked back, "So you're not dying of love for me
now?"
"Oh sure," Ness responded with a big roll of her eyes. She looked down at her
clipboard again and pulled out her pen. "So I think I'm going to order
everything you need for your therapy. Do you mind if I go to your house ahead
of time and get things set up?"

"No, that's fine, go ahead. If you drive to my sister's place, she has a key. I'll let
her know that you're coming."

"That'd be great," Nessie replied. "I guess the only thing left to discuss is our
schedule. Rosalie and I discussed it, and I'm going to have you working out in
the morning with the afternoons off, and then more exercise in the evening.
We don't want you to overwork your body, but we want to continue to keep it
moving as much as possible. You get a break on the weekends. I've seen how
you react around poor Rosalie, so by Saturday, I'm sure we're both going to
want some space."

"Plus, you'll want to see your boyfriend on the weekends," I said, watching
carefully for her reaction.

"That's not going to be a problem, is it?" Ness asked.

"Why would it be?" I responded casually then frowned. "But no overnight

guests."

Renesmee looked like she was trying very hard not to smile. "Okay Dad."

She stood up from her chair and stretched a little. I couldn't help but notice
how the material molded to her breasts.

"I'm not old enough to be your father," I muttered, tearing my eyes away from
her chest region. What the fuck was wrong with me?

"Well, if you had me in high school you could have been."

Impossible. The only girl I had ever had sex with in high school was her mother.
Not that Nessie needed to know that.

"Thanks for reminding me that I'm an old man," I grumbled.

Ness laughed at that. "You're not old, Jacob. Guys don't get old. They become
refined. Women get old."

"So I see." I eyed her up and down. "Yeah, you look decrepit."

"Ha ha," Ness said, sitting slightly on the edge of my bed. "Look at you though.
You've got gray hair right here."

She reached up and ran her fingers through the front of my hair. Little electric
bursts of energy shot all over my scalp. I closed my eyes in response. I liked
the feel of her touching my skin. I'd been feeling so inhuman since the
accident. There was something very soothing and comforting about Ness's
touch. She had magic hands…healing hands.

"See, if women had gray hair like that, we'd be calling the salon," Ness
continued softly. "But you…you look like a young Cary Grant or George
Clooney."

"Is that a good thing?" I wondered, my eyes still closed as her fingers continued
their path through my hair.

"Mmhmm…that's a very good thing," Nessie answered. "It means there's still
hope for you yet."

"So you think some woman will want me, even like this?" I asked.

"Jake, no matter what, you're still you," Ness replied, her fingers now skimming
over my neck and cheek. "I've watched for years as women tried to throw
themselves at you, even after you were married. You're…you won't have any
trouble finding a woman if that's what you want."

Something in her tone changed and I opened my eyes. She was looking at the
hair resting on my forehead with a slight frown. As if sensing my eyes on her,
she began to pull back. I reached up and clasped her wrist, holding her hand to
my cheek. I moved my fingers so that they were covering hers. I watched her
full lips part slightly.

"Hey Nessie…" I whispered, my eyes drawn to her mouth.

I forgot everything in that moment. I forgot that I had been in love with her
mother most of my life. I forgot that I was still technically married to Leah. I
forgot that she was my god-daughter. The fact that this was the little girl I'd
watched grow up didn't even cross my mind as I felt Ness's hand cup my face. I
was about to reach for her to pull her closer to me when someone walked into
the room.

"Hey Jake, I-" Bella began but stopped as soon as she saw her daughter. Nessie
jumped off the bed and took several feet back, her face flushing as she looked
from me to her mother.

"Hi baby," Bella said as she went over and hugged her daughter. "Glad to see
that you finally caught Jacob when he was awake. Did Ness tell you she
stopped by a couple of times to see you but you were always sleeping?"

I nodded my head dumbly. My heart was beating awkwardly, but I didn't know
if that was because I just tried to kiss my god-daughter, or if it was because
Bella of all people was the one who interrupted us.
"Well, I'm glad to see you two are getting a chance to catch up." Bella went on
to say.

"We were just talking about what Jacob was going to need to do his therapy at
home," Ness hurriedly explained.

"Oh…should I come back?" Bella asked.

"No, I think we've gotten everything settled," Ness replied, not looking at me as
she picked up her notepad. "Jake, I'm going to spend the next few days with
Nahuel before he leaves, and then I'm going to head straight for La Push. You
have a ride there, right?"

"Yeah, your parents are going to come get me," I told her, willing her to look at
me. I also wasn't too thrilled about the mention of her boyfriend again.

"Will we see you at Grandpa and Grandma Cullen's house?" Bella asked
Renesmee.

"Uh, no," Ness said, looking at her notepad again. "I'm going to stay at Jake's
house. He thought it would be easier for us to do his therapy if I was living in
his home instead of commuting."

"Did he now," Bella said, looking at me with a raised eyebrow. I squirmed as

best as I could. Bella continued, "You better call your grandparents and let
them know."

"Sure," Ness said, before briefly glancing at me yet still avoiding my eyes.
"Uh…I'll see you both later then."

And with that, she hurried out the door. Bella sat in the chair next to my bed
and just looked at me through narrowed eyes.

"What?" I said, instantly defensively.

"Does Edward need to get out his shotgun? Because as much as he pretends to
know how to use it, I'm pretty sure if he attempted to shoot you, it would be
messy and painful."

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"So it was just my eyes and my daughter wasn't practically lying across your
lap when I walked in?"

"We were just talking, Bella," I replied.

"Jacob, I love you. You know that, right?" Bella said sincerely and my stomach
twisted painfully. I didn't know how many times she told me she loved me over
the years. Nor how many times I wished it were the same type of love that I'd
always felt for her.

I swallowed over the lump in my throat. "I know you do."

"When I suggested Ness help you, I didn't think she'd be spending the night at
your place. Jesus, if Edward had issues with you two working alone together
before, just imagine his reaction to this. You will be careful with my daughter,
won't you?"

"What do you mean?"

"She's always been a little vulnerable, especially when it comes to you. It really
upset her when she heard of your accident."

"It upset her so much that she couldn't even come see me?" That fact still
rankled.

Bella just shook her head. "You don't get it, do you?"

"I get it perfectly. Ness is young, in college, has a pre-med boyfriend, and a full
social life. Who cares if her surrogate uncle was almost killed in an accident." I
could feel my anger start to rise again. My body hurt from my workout with
Rosalie and as much as I adored Bella, I wanted peace and quiet.

"You know that's not Renesmee's style. She cares deeply for you-"

Bella quickly held her hand up when I went to interrupt. She continued, "All I'm
asking is that you don't hurt her, okay?"

"How can I possibly hurt her?" When Bella didn't say anything, I finally said,
"Does this have anything to do with that crush she used to have on me? Cause
Bells, she as good as told me that she only saw me as some old man."

Bella giggled a little at that.

"Besides, she's got her superstar boyfriend," I said sarcastically.

"Oh yes…him," Bella said with a frown.

"What do you have against him? Is he a prick or something?" I asked,

unconsciously holding my breath.

"No," Bella replied slowly. I ignored the strange disappointment I felt. "Not
really. I just don't think he can make my daughter happy. And that's all I want."

"That's all I want too, Bells. I promise that when she's at my house, I'll make
sure she's looked after. I've always taken care of Ness, and that's not going to
change now."
"Okay Jake," Bella said, before adding, "So you're not going to try to seduce her
then?"

"For God's sake, Bella," I replied, throwing my hands in the air in agitation. "I
have no interest in sleeping with your daughter. She's just a kid to me."

It was a lie. It was a complete and utter lie. But I couldn't very well admit that
to Bella. Bella was about to respond when something caught her eye. She
stiffened as she looked at the doorway.

"Sorry to interrupt," Renesmee said, her face unusually pale. "I just wanted to
let you know, Mom, that Grandpa Carlisle asked that you give him a call when
you're done here."

"Sure," Bella said, looking at her daughter then at me with regretful eyes.
Renesmee didn't even acknowledge me as she turned and left the room.

"I should go make that call," Bella added, shaking her head remorsefully. "I'll
see you next week, Jake. Edward and I will be here early to pick you up."

"Thanks Bells," I replied, my eyes still trained on the door half hopeful that
Nessie would magically reappear.

Bella leaned over and gave me a chaste kiss on the cheek. For the first time in
29 years, her touch had zero effect on me. I had bigger things to think about.
Like the shattered look on Renesmee's face before she left my room.

Chapter 3 – Roomies

Jacob's POV

I sat in my wheelchair and stared at the clock impatiently. Edward and Bella
weren't due for another half hour. I really wished they'd show up so I could get
the hell out of here. I was more than a little tired of living in the rehabilitation
center. I was sick of the lack of privacy. I was fed up with the constant noise. I
felt like the walls were closing in on me. Day in and day out, I would get a
claustrophobic sensation of being trapped. When the panicky feeling would
begin to overtake me, I'd force myself to picture the cliffs of La Push which
always helped calm me down.

I looked at the clock again. To hell with it! I was going to call Bella and see
what the hold up was. She said they would be here early, but apparently not
early enough. As I went to grab my phone, my door was pushed open with such
force it slammed against the wall.

"Uncle Jacob!" Oliver Cullen came running into the room, climbing on my lap to
give me a huge hug.
While Nessie took more after her father, Ollie was the image of Bella, with the
exception of his bright green eyes. He had a natural enthusiasm that could
make anyone smile. However, I was so desperate to get out of this place, all I
could muster was a pained grimace.

"You ready?" Edward asked, coming into the room followed by Bella.

"Yes, I've already been discharged."

"We just have to wait for an orderly to escort you outside," Bella said.

"Why? I can get myself out of here without any help," I replied, already
reaching for the wheels.

"Company policy Mr. B.," Emmett the physical therapist said as he came into
the room. "We're a little short staffed so I volunteered to take you."

"Fine, let's go then," I muttered.

"Oliver, get down," Bella instructed.

"Can't I get a ride on Jacob's lap? Please?"

"He's not a toy, Ollie."

"It's okay," I spoke up. I loved Ollie. He reminded me so much of what I could
have had if my son had lived. But I couldn't compare him to what I'd lost. Oliver
Cullen was his own natural force of nature. You couldn't help but get swept in
by the kid.

As we started down the hallway, Ollie held out his hands like an airplane,
making a humming noise as we went. Emmett started chuckling. He began
pushing us faster then he'd go slow, which prompted Oliver to shout out, "go
fast" several times. I covered my face with one hand, trying to ignore the looks
we were getting.

Once we got to the parking lot, Emmett assisted me into the car. I had to
snicker when I saw what Edward was driving. He had a thing for Volvos ever
since we were teens. He was now driving a Volvo XC90, which screamed family
with kids…but it was still his precious Volvo. I took the backseat because it was
actually cozier than the front. Bella reached in and went to help me with my
seatbelt.

"Jeez Bella, I can handle buckling myself in. My arms still work, you know?" I
tried to ignore how close she was to me.

I forced myself not to look at her lips. After Bella had broken up with me and
before my marriage to Leah, I'd gone out of my way to finding a replacement
for her. But no one could ever compare Bella. Her lips were addicting. They
always tasted like strawberries. Even now, I wanted to bend my head just
slightly so that I could lick them and to hell with the fact that her husband and
kid were right there. I sighed as I pushed her hands away from my buckle and
fastened it myself. I'd found myself not obsessing about Bella as much as I had
in the past, but you couldn't just turn off twenty some odd years of longing.

Everyone got settled in their seats and we got on the road. It was a long drive
to La Push, a little over five hours. I spent the first hour letting Ollie show me
how to use his latest gaming toy. It seemed like every year they came out with
some new advanced technological plaything that parents would have to go out
and buy. After a while, Oliver began to yawn. He sprawled out on the backseat,
using my lap as a pillow before promptly falling asleep. I reached out and
touched his soft hair tenderly.

I had given up long ago on the dream of ever becoming a parent. In my current
condition, I knew that dream was now impossible. Contrary to what Nessie said,
I knew I would be a burden to any woman who took me on. Even if someone
did manage to fall in love with me, I didn't know if I could impregnate her.

"You'll be happy to know that Jenny has decided to come to La Push with you."
Bella interrupted my morose thoughts. She turned around in her seat so that
we could talk face to face.

Jenny was my housekeeper in Seattle. She was in her early 30s, full of spunk,
and never let me forget how much I needed her. It was true too. I think Leah
and I probably would have starved over the years since neither of us could
cook. I was surprised to hear that Jenny would be willing to leave Seattle, but I
was grateful too.

"That's good news," I replied to Bella. I noticed that Edward had a satisfied look
to him. Hesitantly, I asked, "What about Ness? Has she gotten settled in yet?"

Edward's face changed into a scowl. Obviously, he wasn't happy about his
daughter's future living situation. Now I understood why he'd looked happy at
the idea of Jenny living at the house too. He thought she'd be a chaperon. I
carefully hid a smirk. Edward took the role of "overprotective father" to such an
extreme. Little did he know that once Jenny did what she was paid for, she
disappeared, usually going to her room or out with friends. It was one of the
reasons I employed her for so long. She loved her privacy almost as much as
she liked to give me mine.

"Yes, that boyfriend of Ness's left a couple of days ago," Bella informed me.
"She went straight to La Push after that."

"She seems really serious about the guy, huh?" I questioned casually.
"They're very happy together," Edward answered with a hint of what I could
only describe as warning in his voice.

"Pfft," Bella replied. "She doesn't love him. Not enough to marry the guy."

"Are they talking marriage?" I asked, feeling slightly uneasy.

"No, I'm just saying. When you meet the guy you're supposed to be with, you
just know," Bella remarked, reaching out to touch the side of Edward's face
lovingly. I looked out the window.

"Well, she says she's happy with Nahuel," Edward countered. "And our
daughter is a grown up who can handle her own decisions."

"Yes, she is," Bella said, looking pointedly at Edward, causing him to squirm.

We stopped at McDonald's for lunch, before getting back on the road again.
Oliver, who was now awake, pulled out a book, Percy Jackson and the
something something, and began to read. I felt myself begin to relax once we
got past Port Angeles. I really wanted to get settled into my home. I was glad
that Jenny would be there but I had to admit, I was more excited about the idea
of getting to spend time with Renesmee.

I frowned as I thought of her. I wasn't happy with how things ended on her last
visit. I was pretty sure that she heard me call her a kid. Not that that should
have bothered her. She made it more than clear that her priority was her
boyfriend. But I couldn't forget the fact that I had wanted to kiss her.

Renesmee had grown into a very desirable young woman. As long as I

remembered that she was my god-daughter and that it was pretty much
forbidden for me to touch her, I'd be all right. What I needed to focus on was
re-establishing our friendship. Even though Ness was a lot younger than me, I
really missed our former closeness. We'd gotten along so well years ago. When
I'd come to visit Bella and Edward, I'd also spend time with Ness, either reading
her a book or watching her favorite cartoons with her. She'd been a really
sweet kid. And I needed to remember that I shouldn't be looking at her in any
other way.

We finally arrived in La Push and went straight to my house. Rachel, Paul and
their three children, River, Willow, and Raine, were there to greet me. Oliver
went shyly up to Rachel's youngest girl, Raine, and said hello. He mumbled
something to her that made her face turn red. Edward chuckled next to me.

When I looked at him questioningly, Edward nodded at his son and said lowly,
"Taught him everything he knows."
Ollie said something else to Raine, which made her stick her nose in the air and
walk back over to her siblings. I started to snicker.

"Yeah, nice job there, Edward. The kid's got no game."

Jenny came flying out of the house and wrapped her arms around my neck
from behind. She was a little bit too enthusiastic and I began to cough.

"Jen-ny…choking me," I spurted.

"Oh…sorry boss," Jenny said, stepping back with a chagrined look on her face.
"It's good to see you out and about."

"It's good to be out," I smiled back.

I was going to tease her about leaving her social life behind in Seattle when I
was suddenly distracted by Renesmee coming outside. She had on form fitting
jeans and a cream colored sweater that hung slightly off her one shoulder.
Either she was wearing a strapless bra or she wasn't wearing one at all. I was
busy trying to decide on which when Ollie went running at his big sister.

Renesmee bent down which allowed me a peep down her shirt. Strapless bra.
She picked Ollie up and started pressing kisses all over his cheeks, which
caused him to squirm and demand to be set down. Once she did, he looked
nervously at Raine, but she was too busy staring in awe at Ness.

"Hey sweetie," Bella said, as she went and hugged her daughter.

Edward quickly followed and whispered loud enough for me to hear, "You know,
you don't have to stay here. You're always welcome at Grandma and Grandpa
Cullen's house."

"Dad, I'll be fine," Renesmee huffed impatiently. Apparently this was an

argument they'd had before. I was starting to feel slightly annoyed with
Edward. When had I ever given him the idea that I would harm Renesmee in
any way? Hadn't I kept my hands off his wife for more years than I could
remember?

"Listen, I figured you guys would be tired from the long drive," Jenny said. "I
have coffee, tea, and snacks prepared if you'd like something."

We made our way towards the house. Someone had arranged for a ramp to be
built next to the front porch steps so that I could get inside without assistance.
I entered the main room and looked around.

It was an open floor plan. Immediately walking into the room, you were greeted
with the sight of two large white stone pillars, marble floors, and white
furniture. The wall opposite of the main entrance was floor to ceiling windows
which showed off a panoramic view of the ocean. The only splashes of color
were a Native American painting hanging over the white stone fireplace and a
red and black native floor rug. Off to the living room was the kitchen. I could
see plates piled on the kitchen island that had delicious fruit, a pitcher of sweet
tea, and a pot of coffee. It was good to be home.

The kids went down to the lower level of the house to play in the game room I'd
had set up for my nieces and nephew. After spending some time talking to his
sister, Oliver went down and joined them. Jenny, Rachel, Ness, and Bella sat at
the barstools next to the island, while Edward, Paul, and I watched a little
baseball on my flat screen. The sun was beginning to set before anyone made
any noise to leave.

When it was just Jenny, Ness, and me, Jenny said she planned on cooking a
huge dinner in honor of our first night in La Push. Ness looked at me
awkwardly. She hadn't really spoken to me much all afternoon.

"Since we have a little over an hour before dinner will be ready, why don't you
and I get a workout in," Ness told me. I was distracted by how the setting sun
coming from the windows had turned her bronze hair into a fiery glow.

"Hmm…" I mumbled before it dawned on me what she said. "I just got here.
Can't I have one night off?"

"You've been sitting in a car or in your chair most of the day. If we don't get
some exercises in tonight, you are going to be too sore to move tomorrow."

"Fine," I grumbled, heading to my room to get changed.

My room was in a secluded part of the house, offering optimal privacy for the
master suite. I assumed that Jenny would take one of the extra bedrooms in
the lower level. I wondered where Ness was going to be sleeping. I had three
guest rooms on the main floor, plus two more in the basement. I didn't allow
myself to dwell on it for long. I changed into some sweats and a plain white-t-
shirt. I rolled my wheelchair back into the living room and looked around for
Ness.

"We converted one of the guest rooms into an exercise room," Jenny told me as
she put some spices into whatever she was making. "Ness is probably in
there."

"Thanks," I mumbled before heading towards the other side of the house.

As I entered, I saw Ness sitting on a massage table, her legs swinging. She was
on the phone and as I didn't want to interrupt her, I looked around the room. An
exercise bike and rowing machine were set up on one side of the room along
with some mats and weights. On the other side were parallel bars.
"Listen, Nahuel, I have to go," Renesmee said as she looked at her watch.
"Okay…I love you too."

She hung up and turned around, jumping slightly when she saw me.

"Sorry, didn't mean to interrupt your time with lover boy," I tried to joke,
however, it came off more snippy than I intended.

"No worries," Ness said. "Let's get you started on the mats."

I went over and got out of my chair as I'd been taught. Once I got myself
situated, Nessie had me start off with a few warm-up exercises before she
actually had me doing harder work. I began to sweat and felt my muscles begin
to tighten. She'd make remarks every once in awhile, but they were always
cool and professional, usually just words of encouragement.

"Would you just talk to me?" I finally snapped as my arm, which was still
healing, began to throb excruciatingly.

"What would you like to talk about?"

"I don't know, but I can't stand this. I hate how there's a wall between us. If
we're going to be living together for the next few months, can you at least
pretend to like me?"

"I do like you, Jacob," Ness replied, not quite meeting my eyes.

"Then look at me when you say that," I demanded.

"Why do you care how I act or what I say?" Ness said angrily, looking me dead
in the face. "I'm just a kid, remember? My thoughts shouldn't matter to you."

So she had heard what I said. I closed my eyes briefly.

"I'm sorry," I finally murmured.

"It doesn't matter," Ness shrugged indifferently. "I can see why you'd think
that. You've always been my parents' friend."

"I'm yours too, Nessie," I told her, reaching up to cup her face. She pulled back
before I could make contact and my hand fell limply to the floor. I tried not to
show how much her rejection stung.

"Well, as your friend, I think I should tell you that you still have a half hour of
hardcore working out to do."

I moaned but did as I was instructed. By the end of 30 minutes, I couldn't do

anymore. As I tried to get back into my chair, my back began to spasm
painfully. I fell on the floor groaning loudly. Ness was by my side in an instant.
"What is it?"

"My back."

Ness bit her lip for a moment before she reached for the hem of my shirt. She
began to tug it off.

"What are you doing?" I asked in surprise.

"I'm going to give you a back massage. That's part of my job," Ness informed
me. "It'll hopefully help relieve some of your pain."

I tried not to show how much I was hurting as she helped me roll onto my
stomach. I placed my head on my hands as I felt Ness begin to work. The pain
was between my shoulder blade and spine.

"I can actually see the muscle twitching," Ness said, before adding in self-
disgust. "I knew we should have flown you home instead of driving. You were in
the car for too long today. No wonder your back is messed up."

I winced as her hand began to move in circles on the spot hurting me the most.

"If it helps, try to picture something pleasant."

"Like what?" I replied through gritted teeth.

"I don't know," Ness responded as she continued to work on me. "How about…
what's your favorite place in the world?"

Anywhere Bella was normally, but I didn't want to say that. Instead, I
concentrated on her question and found that it did distract me from the pain.

"I guess being here. La Push has always been home to me."

"What do you like about it so much?" Ness asked, her hands running soothingly
up and down my back.

"The ocean. The smell of the trees. The people. Being near my family again."

"Family is important," Ness agreed as she began to massage my neck.

"What about you?" I asked curiously. "What's your favorite place?"

"Well…I guess it would have to be Venice."

"Why Venice?"

"It's a very romantic and classic place, you know?"

"Did you and Nahuel go there or something?" I wondered, trying to keep my
voice from becoming annoyed. I didn't know the guy, and quite frankly I didn't
want to hear about him either. I conveniently forgot that I was the one who
brought him up in the first place.

Ness laughed. "No, I went with my parents when I was eight. My dad had a
medical conference there. We got to spend an entire day together, just me and
my parents. My mom kept hitting all the souvenir shops and I eventually got
bored. My dad took me to the Rialto Bridge. Do you know that one? It's
probably the best known bridge in Venice."

"I think so," I replied.

"We spent the next hour there, just watching the gondolas and boats going by.
It's one of my favorite childhood memories. I remember pretending that one
day I'd return with the man of my dreams and we'd come to that bridge
because the view was so romantic."

"And did you have the guy picked out too?" I chuckled.

Ness was quiet for a moment before she finally said, "I don't see your back
spasms anymore. How are you feeling?"

I realized that my back had in fact stopped hurting. "It feels good. Thanks,
Ness."

"Just part of the job," she said casually, handing me my shirt. "I think after
supper, you should take a bath. The heat will be good for your muscles."

"Okay," I said, rolling over so I could face her. "Hey, where are you sleeping
anyway?"

"In the room next to this one. Why?"

"Just wondering if you'd be around in case I needed someone to help wash my

back."

What the fuck? Shut up Jacob. Now!

"I think you'll manage on your own just fine," Ness replied dryly.

"Dinner's ready," Jenny's voice came over the intercom.

"Thanks Jenny," I called, grateful for the interruption.

Ness grabbed my wheelchair and helped me get into it. Together we made our
way to the kitchen area where the three of us ate. The conversation was casual
and tension-free. Ness and Jenny found that they had quite a few things in
common. Their favorite show was, Gene Simmons: Family Jewels. They made
plans to watch the next episode together. I was never big on TV so I felt kind of
out of loop with their conversation.

I found myself looking at Ness quite a few times over the course of the meal. I
kept trying to picture her as a little girl in pigtails, but I was having a lot of
trouble seeing her as anything other than a very beautiful, very attractive
woman. I wondered how serious things really were between her and lover boy.
Not that it was any of my business. Still, he seemed like kind of an ass. Not that
I had any proof to that…I only could go off of Bella's distrust in the guy. Edward
seemed to worship the ground he walked on, but then again, Edward and I only
ever had the same taste when it came to Bella. So maybe Bella's was right on
this one and Edward was wrong. I really hoped that he was wrong anyway.

Ness bit into a piece of fruit that she was having for dessert. A bit of juice
began to work its way down her chin. She ran her finger over it, sucking on the
tip, which of course made me instantly think of sex. Worse, it made me think of
sex with Nessie. I forced myself to think of something else. I wondered what
Leah was doing and that instantly killed any perverted thoughts I was having.

What worried me was that mentally I wanted to reach over and lick the
sweetness from Ness's chin with my tongue. Physically, nothing happened.
That was detrimental to me. Even with my physical therapist, Rosalie, nothing
had made me react to her and she was undoubtedly one of the most beautiful
women in the world. What if I was impotent? Even permanent paralysis didn't
scare me as badly as that thought. I'd researched what people had to do in my
situation. Some guys had to have a pump surgically implanted; others had to
rely on erectile dysfunction pills.

No fucking way was I going to take that route if I didn't need to. What I needed
to find out was if I could still get an arousal. In fact, that was the most
important next step in my recovery. I think it was about time to see if I could
still get one or not.

And I knew just what I needed. Operation Erection was now in full effect.

Chapter 4 – My Experiment

Jacob's POV

I had come up with a game plan for Operation Erection. It was simple enough. I
was going to do the good ole method of whacking off until I went blind. The
problem was, no matter how much I tried, I couldn't get aroused. I was
becoming frustrated and scared shitless.

Two weeks after I had decided that getting an arousal was going to be my life's
main objective, I was still no where near achieving my goal. And on top of that,
things were just awkward between Renesmee and me. My piss poor attitude
probably wasn't helping things either. She was so coolly professional, I felt like
hitting something after every workout I had with her. Instead of reestablishing
our friendship, we became even more distant.

I began to tune her out while she worked on me, because her indifference
drove me up a wall. I'd let my mind wander instead. She told me to concentrate
on happy thoughts to take my mind off the pain and that's what I did.

I'd spend hours fantasizing about Bella. I'd picture us doing it all over the
exercise equipment. I'd imagine me bending her over the massage table, her
straddling me on the rowing machine, us rolling around together on the
workout mats. The images were detailed and explicit. And not one fucking
twinge from Mr. Happy happened.

Should I have felt guilty for fantasizing about one woman while her daughter
continuously tried to get my useless limbs to function again? Probably. But
perhaps if Renesmee hadn't suddenly turned into a cold, unfeeling bitch then I
wouldn't be thinking about fucking her mother all the time. Maybe if she'd just
relax around me and talk to me like she used to, I could keep my thoughts G-
rated.

Ahh, who was I kidding? The only reason I spent hours obsessing over Bella
anymore was because I was trying not to think about Renesmee in an
inappropriate way. The more time I spent with her, the more I realized how
truly grown up she was. She was incredible and when she sometimes forgot
that she didn't like me, I'd catch glimpses of the warm-hearted girl I once knew.

I had to admit, I was more than a little fascinated by the woman Renesmee had
become. Physically, she could drive a man insane. She was beautiful. There
were more times than I could count that I had to resist touching the coppery
locks of her hair. I ached to feel the silky texture with my fingers. And that
wasn't the only thing. Her cheekbones were set high in her sculpted face. When
she smiled, which was rare, they seemed to stand out all but begging me to
cup them in my hands. But it was her eyes that really drew me in.

Her chocolate brown eyes outlined in black were so wonderfully expressive. If

she was happy with whatever progress I made, her eyes would crinkle at the
sides. If she became annoyed by my shitty attitude, then her eyes would spark
angrily. I could tell Renesmee's mood just by a glance into her eyes.

But it wasn't just her physical appearance that attracted me. She had a general
optimism that I found addicting. Even when she was trying to pretend that we
were strangers, she never let me get down on myself. She'd throw statistics at
me about other people's successes in an attempt to remind me that nothing
was impossible. She was also always encouraging me. Whenever I did
something I wasn't able to do before, Nessie would cheer me on, making me
feel like I'd just won an Olympic gold medal.

I also loved how she acted when she didn't think I was paying attention to her.
She was always so relaxed and carefree when she was joking around with
Jenny. Sometimes I'd hear her laugh and it'd make me want to laugh to, even if
I wasn't included in the conversation.

If it weren't for the fact that it was Renesmee, I would have asked her out in a
heartbeat. But I couldn't stop thinking about how she probably only saw me as
an unofficial uncle. Nor could I forget the fact that she was my friend's
daughter. The idea of us dating was just not a possibility.

And so, Operation Erection reached an impasse. Renesmee was a no touching

zone, my Bella fantasies weren't working, and I couldn't get an erection on my
own. I decided to call in for backup.

"Hey Seth, it's Jacob," I called my brother-in-law one day.

"Jake, it's good to hear from you. How are you?"

Seth and Leah were complete opposites. While Leah abhorred rez life, Seth
embraced it. He didn't live that far from La Push and came back to visit it often.
He donated part of his salary as district manager for Jacob's Garage to the rez.
Seth had married when he was in his early 20s and had two children from that
relationship, though he'd been divorced for years now. We had known each
other almost our entire lives, but only became good friends once I married his
sister.

"I'm good, thanks,' I replied. "How are the kids?"

"Laura's good. She has band camp starting soon, so she's pretty excited. I still
can't believe my little girl is thirteen! Cameron's got soccer camp coming up
too. Angela and her new husband Ben are planning on taking the kids to
Disneyland once their schedules calm down. Kids today are so busy."

One of the amazing things about Seth and his ex-wife Angela was that they
were able to put the bitterness of their past behind them and put their children
first. It was something I always admired about them both. And Laura and her
younger brother were some of the most well adjusted children I had ever met.

"I'm glad to hear it," I said. "You still planning on taking the kids to the cabin in
Vancouver this summer?"

It was an annual tradition Seth had started with his kids when he and Angela
first separated.
"Yep, the trip's still on once they come back from California," Seth answered,
before questioning, "So how are things going with you and Renesmee?"

I sighed as I sat back in my wheelchair and stared out my bedroom window at

the ocean below.

"It's…okay. Nessie's an excellent physical therapy assistant and she's definitely

making me work."

"And that's all?"

"Of course. What else would there be?"

"Well…with all that's going on between you and my sister with the separation
and everything, I thought you and Nessie were maybe…you know…"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa," I interrupted. "First off, I'm still married to your sister.
Secondly, Nessie is my god-daughter-"

"A very hot…very legal god-daughter."

"Who's still the child of my closest friends," I replied before lowering my voice.
"Not to mention that I was once intimately involved with her mother. That shit's
just weird. Besides, I don't even think of Ness that way."

"Yeah, but she thinks of you that way," Seth instantly replied.

"What do you mean?" I asked, trying to squash the strange happiness I was
suddenly feeling.

"Puh-lease," Seth said and I knew he was rolling his eyes at me. "That girl has
wanted you since forever. She's hot, young, probably very flexible and bendy-"

"Okay, I'm going to stop you right there," I quickly interrupted. "Don't talk
about Ness that way."

"Sure," Seth snorted.

"Besides, even if I wanted to do that with her, which I don't, I'm…uh…I'm

having trouble in that department right now."

"What? You can't get a stiffy?" Seth asked blatantly. I felt myself cringe.

"No…not right now," I said quietly, though I was the only one in the house.
Jenny and Ness went grocery shopping.

"Dude, I'm sorry…"

I sighed. "That's actually what I'm calling you about."

"Uh…not really sure how I can help you there. I mean, I like you Jake, but
you're not really my type. Dammit, I knew Leah would turn you gay-"

"Would you shut up, dickhead! I don't actually need your personal assistance
on this one. But I do need a favor…"

A couple hours after I got off the phone with Seth, I was waiting in the living
room for him, watching TV, when Nessie and Jenny got home.

"Hey girls," I said, my eyes glancing nervously towards the open front door.
There was still no sign of Seth.

"Hi Jake," Jenny said brightly. "Did you get yourself something to eat, or do you
want me to fix you a sandwich?"

"I'm good, thanks," I replied, my eyes absently following Ness as she helped
unpack one of the grocery bags. She glanced at the clock on the wall.

"I need to get going," she mumbled apologetically to Jenny.

"You have a hot date or something?" I joked. It was Saturday, which was my
one day off from physical therapy with Nessie.

"Actually I do," Ness said, not meeting my eyes. "Nahuel is back from Chile so
he's coming into town for the evening."

"No overnight guests, remember?" I automatically responded and wanted to

curse myself when Renesmee immediately stiffened. Jenny rolled her eyes at
me.

"Yes, I remember your rules," Ness said formally. "He's actually going to crash
at Grandpa Charlie's tonight after our date. Now, if you'll excuse me."

She walked out of the area without a backwards glance at me. I heard Jenny
snort.

"What?" I asked defensively.

"What was that about…'no overnight guests?'" She mocked.

"I'm responsible for Ness while she stays here," I explained. "And I don't think
her parents would want me to allow her boyfriend to spend the night."

"You realize that she's 22-years-old. I seriously doubt that they go out and play
Parcheesi with each other."

"You know what? I don't want to discuss this with you," I told her, grabbing the
remote control and turning up the volume on the TV, all the while ignoring my
suddenly churning stomach.
"Fine, whatever you say, boss," Jenny muttered, going back to unpacking the
groceries.

There was a knock on the front door. It opened without invitation.

"Anyone home?" Seth called out, poking his head in the room while holding a
brown paper grocery bag.

"Come on in, Seth," I called, my eyes instantly shooting to Jenny before

glancing towards the hallway where Ness's bedroom was. I really didn't want
them to know what I was up to.

"I brought you all the…" Seth started to say before he saw Jenny in the kitchen
and stopped talking. I looked at my housekeeper and watched as she made
eye contact with Seth. She began to nervously pat her sandy blond shoulder
length hair.

"Hello Seth," Jenny said.

"Hey Jen," Seth responded. "I didn't know you had decided to come to La Push."

"Felt like a change of scene," Jenny shrugged.

I sat back in my chair and looked at first one person, then the other. It was like
watching a tennis match. You wondered who was going to shoot the ball in the
other's court next. I never quite understood Jenny and Seth's weird
relationship. I wondered sometimes if they had at one time had a thing
together shortly after Seth's divorce, but they always remained distant around
each other. At first, I thought it was because of Leah. If she'd known that her
brother was involved with one of the "help" she would have insisted that we
fire Jenny. But they were standoffish even when Leah wasn't around.

"Well, it's uh…it's nice to see you again, Jen," Seth stumbled.

"Nice to see you too," Jenny said with an insincere flash of a smile. She eyed
the package that Seth was holding. "Do you want me to take that for you?"

"No!" Seth exclaimed, holding the brown bag even tighter to his chest, all the
while his face turning bright red. "This is for Jake."

"Oookay," Jenny drawled out, turning to begin working on some meal she was
planning. Seth sent me a look that shot daggers.

"Where do you want this?" He asked, looking down at the bag.

"Can you put it on my bed?"

"Sure," Seth replied, sending Jenny a fleeting look before hurrying in the
direction of my room.
Ness came into the living room then. I lost all conscious thought. She looked
magnificent. Her hair which normally hung just past her shoulders was pulled
into some kind of loose bun, which immediately drew attention to her long,
kissable neck. She was wearing a black strapless satin dress that hugged her
body with a neckline that emphasized her breasts. The skirt flowed just passed
her thighs and had deep pockets to it. She had on fuck-me red high heels
which showed off the pale smooth color of her legs. She wore red studded
earrings and a chunky red bracelet as her only jewelry. I wanted to force her to
go into her room and put on sweats and a baggy shirt. I had never seen her
look more adult…or more desirable. And I didn't like it one fucking bit.

"You're wearing that for a date in Forks?" I asked with a little too much bite.

"Yes," Ness said, looking down to inspect her dress. "We're going to the Lodge,
and since I haven't seen Nahuel in two weeks, I thought I'd dress up."

"This isn't Park Avenue, you know? Isn't your everyday look good enough for
lover boy?" Bella was right! This guy was a prick. He sounded like a snob.

"Nahuel grew up in a poor village. Trust me when I say, he doesn't care

anything about fashion. I don't get a lot of chances to dress up and I felt like
going all out tonight. Is that okay with you?"

I gritted my teeth and was about to tell her something stupid…like she couldn't
go out with her dipshit boyfriend…when Jenny interrupted.

"You look really cute, Ness. Pay no attention to Jacob. He wouldn't know good
taste in clothes if it bit him on the ass."

"Don't you have some cooking to do," I told my housekeeper before turning on
Renesmee. "I don't think your parents would approve of that outfit."

"Aunt Alice bought it for me with my parents' knowledge. Jeez Jake, would you
relax?"

Before I could say anything else, I heard a cat call whistle. Seth came into the
room and hugged Renesmee.

"Wow Ness, you're looking good. What's it been? Two years since I last saw
you? You've grown up."

Seth said it with a wiggle of his eyebrows. Ness just laughed. I suddenly felt like
getting up and punching my brother-in-law in his face. Jenny apparently had
the same idea, because she slammed a pot on the stove loud enough to make
us all jump.

"I guess I should get going," Renesmee said, grabbing her purse off the hallway
table.
"What? He's not even coming here to pick you up?" I asked snidely.

"No Jacob, you said you didn't want him here. And as he only recently got back
from Chile and made the special trip all the way out here just to see me, I
thought the least I could do was save him the extra 15 minutes and meet him
at Grandpa's."

"All right, fine," I told her while folding my arms over my chest. "Will you at
least let me know when you're home?"

"Fine," Renesmee responded, before waving goodbye to Jenny. She reached

over and gave Seth a brief hug before heading out the door without another
glance in my direction. I felt restless and moved my chair to the window,
looking out at the ocean below.

"I…uh…I guess I'll get going then," Seth said. Through the reflection of the
glass, I saw him staring at Jenny again.

"See ya," she responded indifferently. I almost smiled. If Seth wanted to act like
a friggin player with my god-daughter, then I was big enough of a dick to
appreciate when he got shot down by someone else.

"I put the package on your bed per instructed, Jake," Seth said, reminding me
of the favor he was doing for me.

"Thanks Seth," I turned around and nodded.

"Sure," he replied and with a sudden snicker added, "I hope it rises to your
expectations."

Before I could throw anything at him, Seth was out the door laughing as he
went. Jenny made us a simple dinner. Neither one of us were in the mood for
small talk. I kept glancing at the clock wondering when Renesmee was going to
come home. Finally around 11 PM, I called it a night. I wondered if Ness was
going to crash at Charlie's. I didn't like the idea. I knew she wouldn't do
anything with lover boy in her grandfather's house, but who knew what the
boyfriend would try. Charlie might have been the former Chief of Police, but he
was retired now and not as quick as he used to be.

I rolled myself into my bedroom and saw the package Seth had left me sitting
on the bed. I began to drum my fingers nervously on the arm of my wheelchair.
On one hand, I really wasn't in the mood to do what I was about to do. On the
other, I really wanted to see if Operation Erection was going to be successful or
not. Finally deciding I couldn't put it off any longer, I went over to the bed and
dumped it over. DVD after DVD of pornographic movies poured out.

Saturday Night Beaver, Legally Boned, Spankenstein, Rambone

What the fuck was wrong with Seth? From what he hinted, these came from his
personal collection. I looked at what else he included in the bag and almost
laughed when I saw a bottle of Jergen's lotion and a box of Kleenex. Well, at
least he thought of everything.

I shifted through the movies and picked out one that looked the most
promising, Buffy The Vampire Layer. Making sure my bedroom door was shut, I
took off my t-shirt and shorts and after putting the movie into the DVD player, I
pulled myself onto the edge of my bed, completely naked. Putting some lotion
in my hand, I began to spread it over my softened member in preparation. It
felt abnormal. I hadn't tried anything like this since before the accident.

An hour into the movie I was in the same position, sitting on the bed with my
dick in my hands. I had tried everything, jerking it, using soft strokes, hard
strokes…nothing worked. Instead, I was busy critiquing the horrible acting of
the porn stars. This shit was seriously terrible. I was about to give up on Buffy
and put in another movie, when there was a knock on my bedroom door.

Horrified that someone might have heard the overly acted moans of pleasure
coming out of the TV speakers, I hit mute and called out, "What?"

"Jacob?" Renesmee's quiet voice responded. F-U-C-K!

"Uh…just a second," I answered, completely panicking.

I hit the off button on the TV and quickly scooted myself on the bed, taking all
the movies, bottle of lotion, and tissue with me. I shoved everything under the
covers and threw my blanket over myself. I looked around, making sure that all
evidence of my little experiment was invisible.

"Come in," I finally said, my heart pounding. Renesmee came into the room,
still wearing her dress and looking beautiful.

"You said you wanted to know when I was back, so I'm back."

"Oh…right," I replied. "Did you have fun?"

"Yeah, we had a nice time, but Nahuel was pretty tired so I decided to come
home."

I really liked when she called my house, "home."

"Are you feeling okay?" She suddenly asked.

"Yeah," I said a little too quickly. "Why would you ask that?"

"You seem kind of sweaty."

Yeah, getting caught almost in the act did that to a guy. I hadn't experienced
this situation since I was 12 and my mom walked in on me once beating it to
her JCPenny lingerie catalog. I looked over at Ness. While a part of me was
suddenly tempted to keep her in my room all night, I really didn't want her in
here right now. Especially when I was lying in a bed filled with pornos, not to
mention the fact that I was currently butt naked.

"I'm fine," I responded before adding dismissively, "thanks for letting me know
you're home."

"Sure," Renesmee nodded, looking at me almost expectantly. When I didn't say

anything else, she sighed quietly and turned to leave. She paused as she
looked at the foot of my bed. With a strange smirk on her face, she bent down
to the floor and lifted up a DVD, The Devil Wears Nada.

Before I could even respond or self-implode from humiliation, Ness threw the
movie on the bed.

"I think you dropped this," she said. With a shake of her head, she left the room
laughing as she went. I laid back against my pillow and threw an arm over my
eyes. If I ever made it through this embarrassment I was going to kill Seth. Not
that it was his fault, but I needed to blame someone.

After about an hour, I finally got out of bed and rolled myself into the
bathroom. I needed to take a shower. I had lotion on parts of my body that
should never have lotion. My bathroom was meant to match the grandeur of
my master suite. Aside from his and her sinks, I also had a Jacuzzi tub, and a
double head shower which included a stone bench. The bathroom was covered
in cream and light brown colored tiles. It was stylish, convenient, and
comforting all rolled into one.

I arranged myself on the shower's stone bench and reached up for the
detachable showerhead. Grabbing a bar of soap, I began to lather my nether
regions. I went to put the soap back but it slipped out of my hand and hit the
floor below. Could this night get any worse?

Reattaching the showerhead to the wall, I bent down to get the soap.
Unfortunately, I wasn't balanced properly and I fell off my bench, hitting my
head on the tiled wall as I went. I let out a little yell as I hit the ground. My
head ached painfully in return.

"GOD DAMMIT!" I added for good measure.

My head began to immediately throb like a son of a bitch. I tried to pull myself
back up on the bench, but I became dizzy with the effort. I leaned back and
accepted my fate. It looked like I was going to be sleeping on the floor of the
shower tonight with the water still running all over me.
"Jacob?" A voice said. "Jake, are you okay?"

"Ness, I fell," I answered. "But don't come in-"

It was too late. Renesmee already entered, her face filled with worry. I noticed
that she had changed out of her dress. She was now wearing a long white
nightgown with spaghetti straps. It was made of silk. I filed that tidbit away in
my head. Nessie liked to wear soft materials.

"What did you do?" She asked, coming over to me.

"I went to get some soap I dropped and I lost my balance."

"Are you hurt?" She questioned, stepping into the shower, seemingly unaware
of the water from the showerhead that was now turning her nightgown into a
second skin…a very wet, very sheer skin.

"How…uh…how did you hear me?" I asked, pulling my eyes away from her
body.

"I was getting some juice in the kitchen when I heard you yell," she explained,
before reaching up to touch the side of my face. "It looks like you bumped your
head pretty hard, but you should live."

It was in that moment I remembered I was completely naked. A second later, I

realized that the nightgown Nessie was wearing had turned completely
transparent. I could see everything. Her areolas were the color of rose petals,
her nipples jutting temptingly towards me. I also noticed that she apparently
didn't wear panties to bed. I was just starting to focus on the enticing triangle
barely hidden from my view when it happened.

"Ah," I quickly rolled myself away from her, facing the wall. I reached down and
tried to cover myself as best as I could.

"Jake, what's wrong?" She asked, immediately concerned.

"Could you hand me a couple of towels?" I begged. Oh God, please tell me she
didn't see Mr. Happy. Please, please, please.

She immediately got up and handed me some towels. I threw one over my
waist and the other over my stomach.

"I'm okay Ness," I told her. "I'm sorry I startled you. You better get back to
bed."

"Jake, I don't mind helping-"

"No!" I snapped, eager to get her out of this room, before I did something
regrettable…like grab her and try to test out how long I could make my
erection last.

Instead of touching her, I said, "I'm fine. Please Ness, can you just give me
some privacy?"

"Fine," she finally said in a slightly injured tone. "Good night Jacob."

"Night."

As soon as I knew she was gone, I took the towel off and stared at my lower
half which was now beginning to ache. What the hell had I done in my former
life to deserve this? I had spent hours fantasizing about Bella and just spent a
good chunk of my night watching porn, and I couldn't get even the slightest
twinge out my member. But seeing my god-daughter's wet, almost naked
body, and I was harder than a rock.

Renesmee was off limits, and yet, she was the secret to unlocking my trapped
desire.

I was so completely fucked!

Chapter 5 – Not So Good News

Jacob's POV

It was strange how a sudden discovery in your life could change the dynamics
of your relationship with someone. Since becoming injured, I couldn't deny that
I hadn't had the odd fantasy here and there about Renesmee. Maybe I even
fantasized a little bit too much about my god-daughter. But I wouldn't be a
flesh and blood heterosexual male if I hadn't. She was gorgeous.

However, in the week since my little experiment proved to me that all I wanted
was Ness, there was a subtle difference in our relationship. I was more aware
of her than ever. And I think she felt the same way.

Sometimes when she worked on me, she'd stretch my legs in a way that would
cause my shorts to tighten across my lap. Several times I caught her eyes
drifting there which would make her face flame. Her reaction made me wonder
if she'd gotten a peep of Mr. Happy when she found me in the shower. I
couldn't decide if I was horrified by the idea or really intrigued.

At this point in my life, I wasn't sure about anything anymore. I didn't know if
I'd ever walk again. I wasn't sure how sex would work for me given that I
couldn't move the lower half of my body. I wasn't sure if I should give into the
lust I felt for Nessie. I didn't even know if she'd give me the chance. There was
only one thing I was perfectly sure of.
I was becoming way too preoccupied with my god-daughter. Everything about
her captured my attention. The way her eyebrows would sometimes draw
together when she was in deep thought. The way she'd subconsciously twirl the
back of her hair when she was reading the newspaper during breakfast. The
way she'd sometimes look at me from the corner of her eye. And most of all,
the way she'd blush when she realized I was staring back…which was all the
time now.

I think before my experiment, I was able to still put Renesmee into a safely
gilded box. I wouldn't permit my thoughts to stray for too long on her.
Whenever my mind would go X-rated, I'd remind myself that she was Bella's
daughter. Now, all my good intentions were out the door.

I wanted Ness. Whether it was right or wrong, I wanted her. It was sometimes
difficult for me to concentrate when she was nearby because all I wanted to do
was grab her and make wild, passionate love to her.

I doubted she'd ever allow it though. I might have finally seen the light and
realized that Ness was someone I physically wanted, but that didn't mean she
returned what I was feeling. She had her bloody lover boy. He called all the
damn time. Overly persistent people bugged the shit out of me, but Ness didn't
seem to think there was an issue. If I'd complain, she'd always just roll her eyes
and remind me that I wasn't her father.

Which brought me to my biggest problem. Ness still treated me like a lovable

uncle. I knew I should be treating her likewise, but Pandora's Box had been
opened and as far as I was concerned there was no going back.

The thing was that even though, yes, I wanted Ness sexually, that wasn't the
only thing that had changed. We had begun to talk more. Though the sexual
tension was thick, we were re-establishing our former relationship. I didn't
know what caused Ness to lighten up around me. Maybe it was the fact that
she'd caught me with a bunch of porn and took too much joy in my humiliation.
Maybe it was because of what happened in the shower. I didn't know what had
changed between us, but I was grateful that something had. We joked a lot
more during my therapy sessions or we'd have serious discussions about her
school or my business. Our conversations helped me get through our workouts
without my thoughts drifting too much into pervert land.

I knew I was becoming physically and emotionally attracted to Renesmee. And I

didn't know what to do about it. So instead of dwelling on what I couldn't or
shouldn't have, I began focusing all my energy into getting better. I threw
myself into my workouts with gusto.

I was actually looking forward to my next checkup with my doctor. I was pretty
sure that when I saw him again, he'd tell me that I could expect my legs to
start working at any moment. Though I spent most of my days in a wheelchair,
I felt in better shape than I'd ever been before. It was on a Friday that I got the
not so good news.

"Jacob, I'm sorry," the doctor told me after conducting several tests." The
swelling has completely dissipated from your back. Every sign indicates that
you should be able to walk right now…"

"But everybody's body heals differently," I interjected thinking of something

Nessie had told me once.

The doctor paused before looking at me regrettably. "I think you should make
long term plans for permanent paralysis."

"Are you saying there's no hope left?" I asked in a shaken voice.

"I'm saying that I believe it to be in your best interest to make the necessary
arrangements in your life to make things more accommodating to your
paralyzed state."

I couldn't say anything. Feeling defeated and depressed, I rolled myself into the
hallway where Jenny was waiting for me. Ness had to attend some all day
seminar in Seattle as a requirement to keep her physical therapy assistant
certification. She was going to be spending the night at Nahuel's place.

"So what'd the doc say?" Jenny asked as we drove back to La Push.

"Nothing new," I replied quietly, staring out the window.

"You must be happy to finally have that cast off, huh?" Jenny remarked. That
was the only good thing about my appointment today. The cast that I'd had on
my arm since the accident had finally been taken off.

"Mmhmm," I responded desolately.

I remained quiet for the rest of the evening, locked in a prison of my own
personal hell. I couldn't accept that I was going to be confined to this
wheelchair for the rest of my life. How could I start making plans for what my
doctor thought was inevitable when my mind refused to accept it?

"Jake, I'm going to turn in for the evening," Jenny said as I sat watching TV. "Do
you need anything?"

"No, that's okay. Thanks Jenny," I replied.

"Sure," she answered, looking at me with concern. She'd been looking at me

like that all evening. I ignored her and continued to stare at the television
screen blankly, not comprehending anything that was on. It was sometime
after 11 PM that I heard the front door open. I glanced over and saw Renesmee
come in. She stopped when she saw me.

"I thought you were staying in Seattle," I said in surprise, ignoring the way my
heart sped up slightly at her presence.

"I thought I was too," Ness replied, putting her car keys and purse on the table
next to the main entrance. "And then I got a call from Jenny telling me you
were acting like a zombie."

She walked over and sat down next to me on the couch.

"So you wanna tell me about it?" She asked.

"Wasn't lover boy pissed that you ditched him?" I questioned instead.

"He was…understanding," Ness remarked hesitantly. "He's going to come here

tomorrow instead and we're going to go out."

"Why did you come back tonight?" I wondered.

Ness's brow furrowed before she admitted, "I was worried about you. Jenny
said you seemed upset after the doctor's today, but you wouldn't say what was
wrong."

"You don't have to worry about me," I remarked, glancing at her before looking
back at the TV again.

"Jake," Ness said in an impatient tone. "What did the doctor say?"

I sighed before running my hand wearily over my face. "He said that I should
be walking by now and that I might as well accept my fate. I'm going to be
crippled for the rest of my life."

My hand was still covering my face when I felt Ness move next to me. Her
fingers were suddenly around my wrist, dragging it away from my face. I
looked at her and found that she had moved so that she was kneeling in front
of me on the floor. She was staring up at me earnestly.

"I don't believe it," she told me. "I don't believe that you'll never walk again."

I couldn't resist. I reached out and touched a lock of her soft hair, tucking it
behind her ear before cupping her one cheek. She leaned into it slightly.

"Ness, it's over, okay?" I replied. "The sooner I accept it, the better off I'll be at
moving on with my life."

"So that's it?" She asked. "One asshole doctor tells you something and you
become a defeatist? Where's the Jacob that I know because you're not him."
She pulled away from me and began to pace. If I wasn't so fucking useless, I'd
be able to get up and pull her back to me. Guess that'll never happen though.

"The Jake I know never gives up on anything," Renesmee continued. "Where's

the Jacob who taught me how to ride a bicycle and wouldn't let me give up no
matter how many times I wanted to quit? Where's the Jake who built an entire
empire from the ground up?"

"I'm tired of deluding myself," I admitted. "It's over. I understand that this
means your work here is done."

My stomach lurched at the idea of her leaving, but there was no point of
continuing to employ her. I was just wasting her time.

"Oh no." Ness finally stopped in front of me and crossed her arms over her
chest. The action only emphasized her breasts which made me quickly look
away. "You might have given up Jacob Black, but I haven't."

She knelt back down in front of me and rested her elbows on my legs. I wished
I could feel it.

"Starting Monday, we're going to up your routine," she informed me. "I'm going
to have you start using the bike. It has a mode on it that will automatically
make your legs move so you don't have to manually pedal. It'll help with the
circulation though. I also want you to start using your pool. It's heated, right?"

"Yes," I nodded. I had an indoor pool included when I built the house. Not that
I'd ever used it that much.

"Good, we'll start using that as well. It'll help build up your upper body
strength. Plus, you'll be able to move around on your own. Your problem is that
you've gotten way too comfortable in letting your chair do all the work for you.
I think you're going to like swimming. It'll give you the ability to move on your
own again. We need to start building up your confidence."

"Why don't you just give up on me?" I asked, half smiling at her determination.

"That'll never happen," Renesmee replied instantly.

And then she did something I didn't expect. Getting up on her feet, she leaned
in and kissed my cheek. Or at least, it was supposed to be a friendly kiss on the
cheek. I was so surprised to see her head so close to mine that I turned my
head at the last moment and our lips made contact.

It was the briefest of seconds, but it was enough to shoot need throughout my
entire body. I wanted to grab her and pull her on my lap. I went to deepen the
kiss, but Renesmee pulled back.
"Whoops," she said with a blush, not looking at me as she put some distance
between us. "I guess I should watch my aim, huh?"

"It was my fault," I told her gruffly. "I moved my head."

Not that I regretted it. It was sad to admit, but though it was just a small kiss, it
had been the highlight of my year so far.

"Well…" Ness said, looking at me with an embarrassed smile. "You want to

watch a movie? I could make some popcorn."

"Yeah, I'd like that," I responded, somewhat relieved that she didn't go running
off into her room. I was also a little disappointed we weren't going to kiss some
more. I watched as Ness went into the kitchen to make the popcorn.

"Do you mind if I burn it a little?" She asked.

Since Renesmee was a kid, she loved to eat popcorn that was always slightly
burnt. And somewhere over the years, I'd picked up her habit. Anytime I would
deliberately burn my popcorn, it would remind me of Ness and some of the
happier times in my life. Plus as an added bonus, Leah used to get so pissed if I
burnt the stuff and wouldn't touch it if she saw one darkened kernel.

"Burnt popcorn is fine with me," I replied to her question.

"What do you want to drink: soda, water, or beer?" Ness asked.

"A beer would be great," I told her. She came back carrying two Buds and our
bowl of slightly burnt popcorn. Ness settled down next to me and threw a
blanket over both of our laps. Though it was summertime, there was a chill in
the air.

We decided to watch Avatar, though I wasn't sure if either of us would be able

to stay awake long enough to get through the whole movie. But it was a nice
compromise. Ness got the romantic plot she preferred, and I got the action I
liked in my movies. Halfway through it, I felt Ness slump against my shoulder.

Looking down, I saw that her eyes were closed, her breathing even. As carefully
as possible, I pushed Ness away from me so that her cheek was resting against
the seat cushion. I debated with myself for a moment. The proper thing to do…
the thing I should do as her unofficial uncle…would be to wake her up and tell
her she should go to bed. But the part of me that felt unmanly, the part that
felt pathetic and useless, wanted to hold her even if it was just for a short time.
I wanted to pretend that I was a full functioning man again. And I really, really
wanted to know what it was like to hold Ness in my arms.

Decision made, I maneuvered myself so that I was lying with my back against
the back cushion of the couch. I was careful not to jostle Ness too much, but it
wasn't easy. Once I got situated, I placed an arm around Nessie's waist and
dragged her until her head was underneath my chin. She shifted and I
momentarily froze, thinking I'd woken her. She murmured incoherently and
pressed herself more fully against me before settling down. Her breathing
became steady and even and I knew she was in a deep sleep.

Careful not to disturb her, I wrapped my arm around her waist, trying not to
groan as I felt her bottom press against my member. I tried to ignore the
sensation and instead took a deep breath of her hair, running my cheek and
lips over the back of her head. It was like kissing gold spun silk. I loved it. I
shifted my attention back to the TV and continued to watch my movie with
Ness curled into me. I almost felt like myself again.

Towards the end, I fell asleep. When I woke up again, it was morning.
Sometime during the night, I had managed to shift so that I was lying on my
back. Renesmee had her arm around my waist, her head resting on my
shoulder, one knee between my legs. Her thigh was pressed against my groin,
which may have been what woke me up.

She hadn't hurt me with her pressure to that sensitive area. Far from it. I was
fully aroused. I made a hissing noise as Nessie shifted, adding friction against
my erection. The noise made her eyes flutter before they slowly opened. She
looked at me for a moment before lifting slightly away. Her leg moved away
from my lower half and I whimpered remorsefully.

"Why didn't you wake me last night?" Ness asked in a bemused tone, her voice
sexily groggy.

"Sorry, I just…" I didn't know how to excuse my behavior so I just told her the
truth. "I wanted to feel what it was like again."

"What do you mean?" Ness questioned in confusion.

"I wanted to…to remember what it was like to hold an attractive woman in my
arms all night. To remember what it's like to be a man."

Ness's face flushed when I called her attractive, but she didn't get up off my
lap. She reached up and ran her thumb across one of my eyebrows before
letting her hand rest against my cheek.

"You are a man, Jake. Being in a wheelchair doesn't change that," she told me.
I scoffed in return, which made her angry. "What do I have to do to prove that
to you?"

She suddenly shifted over me so that her arms were on either side of me. She
pushed her legs between mine. My one leg slipped off the couch, but neither of
us noticed. Ness lowered herself against me so that her breasts were pressed
firmly against my chest, her lips mere inches from mine.

"Being in a chair doesn't define who you are, don't you get that?" she
whispered.

She angled herself so that her feminine core was right against my member.
She felt incredible and my body became even harder. Ness's eyes widened as
she realized what was happening to me.

"See…" she said breathlessly. "You feel very manly to me."

She pressed her lower half against me causing me to groan. How badly I
wished I could thrust up. Instead, I placed my hands hesitantly on her back,
before letting them drift to her round bottom. Her breath hitched and she
rocked against me several more times. The friction began to build.

"Is this part of my therapy?" I joked tenderly.

"Whatever works," Ness smiled back, her eyes flaming with desire as she
pressed against me again causing us both to moan this time.

I moved one of my hands from her bottom until it was at the back of her neck. I
started to pull her towards me so that I could finally kiss her lips more fully
when we heard something that made us freeze.

"Jenny," Ness whispered, leaping off me. She threw the blanket over my lap to
hide the evidence of what we were doing. She shook her head as she looked at
me.

"What am I doing?" She asked in disbelief.

"Ness-" I replied slowly, reaching out for her. She jerked even farther away
from me.

"Nahuel is going to be here in an hour." She shook her head at me before

repeating to herself, "What am I doing?"

She hurried past me and headed down the hall. I heard her murmur something
to Jenny but I couldn't hear what it was. Jenny came into the room moments
later in a sundress.

"I'm headed out," she told me. Saturdays were her day off. "I'll probably be
gone for most of the day. Do you need anything before I leave?"

"Could you get the coffee going?" I pleaded.

Jenny glanced from where Ness had disappeared to where I was laying on the
couch. She raised an eyebrow at me.
"We fell asleep watching Avatar," I explained defensively.

"Sure," Jenny replied with a smirk. She headed over to the coffee pot.

Grumbling to myself, I got into my chair and headed down the hallway for a
shower. When I came out, Jenny was gone, but some badly needed coffee was
waiting for me. I grabbed a cup and was drinking it, waiting impatiently for
Ness to make an appearance, when there was a knock on the front door.

Please tell me it's not lover boy.

Whatever higher power I was praying to apparently had voicemail and didn't
get the message, because when I opened the door, the punk was on the other
side.

"Hello sir, my name is Nahuel, I'm here for Renesmee," he said, putting out his
hand for me to shake. I gritted my teeth. Sir? He could go fuck himself. I forced
myself to reach out and briefly return his proffered handshake.

"She's getting dressed," I said in a tone that indicated I had personal

knowledge of Ness's state of undress. I felt satisfaction when Nahuel's
eyebrows snapped together. That's right, bitch.

Instead of ordering him off my property, I decided to be cordial. "Come on in.

She should be out in a moment. Would you like some coffee?"

"No thank you," Nahuel responded politely as he looked around.

I took my time to observe my competition, because that was exactly what this
guy was. I guess he could be deemed "good-looking," if you were into that
preppy, Latin look. Nahuel had dark brown hair that flopped down past his ears.
He had almond shaped dark eyes that took in everything. He was tall, though if
I were able to stand I'd probably be taller. Worse, the shorts he was wearing
revealed muscular full functioning legs. They were at my eye level and seemed
to taunt me. God, I hated this guy.

I went over to the intercom and stabbed it with my thumb. "Ness, Nahuel is
here."

There was a pause before I heard, "Be right there."

I rolled myself into the middle of the room and turned back to give lover boy
my full attention.

"So where are you kids off to tonight?" I asked condescendingly.

"Well sir…" he started and I gritted my teeth. I swear to fuck, if this son of a
bitch called me 'sir' one more time, I was going to find a way to drop kick his
ass. "…we're going to the movies and then out to dinner. I plan on taking Ness
to Port Angeles."

"That sounds…cute." I said in a derogatory tone.

Nahuel's eyes flashed. "It probably is cute to someone of your advanced age,
but Ness and I enjoy it."

That was fucking it! I was going to kick this fucker's little ass all the way back
to Seattle! I put my hands on the wheels of my chair, intending to roll over and
punch him in the gonads. Unfortunately, I heard the clicking of Ness's heels
before I could do anything. She soon came into view looking stunning as
always. She had on a short sleeved sky-blue sweater which matched her blue
plaid capri pants. The pants molded her shape reminding me of the fact that I
had been grabbing that ass not even two hours ago.

"Hi." She smiled at Nahuel, making my stomach twist. Her eyes moved over to
me and our gazes seemed to lock. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Nahuel
look from me to Ness.

"You look beautiful," he stated, walking over to Renesmee and kissing her. It
was obvious what he was doing. He was staking his claim. My hands clenched
on the wheels of my chair. I relaxed slightly as Ness broke away quickly.

"Ready to go?" She asked in a high-pitched voice.

"Yes," Nahuel replied, wrapping his arm possessively around her waist.

"I'll see you later, Jacob," Ness said, meeting my eyes one more brief time
before she went out the door with lover boy. What the fuck!

I tried to reason with myself. What happened on the couch was probably just a
fluke. Renesmee and Nahuel had been dating for awhile now. I couldn't just
expect her to dump him because we had an incredibly arousing session of dry-
humping earlier.

But seriously, what the fuck!

I went over to the kitchen cupboard and pulled out a bottle of bourbon.
Glancing at the clock, I saw that it was only a little after noon.

Ah well, it was 5 o'clock somewhere.

Hello Jim Beam. It's time we got reacquainted.

Chapter 6 – The Better Choice

Nessie's POV
What the hell had I been thinking?

That was the question I'd been asking myself since I had woken up this
morning draped all over Jacob on the couch. And my wanton behavior didn't
just end there. No, no. What made everything so much more cringe-worthy was
that I practically threw myself at him. I felt his erection against my body and I
took advantage of the situation. I'd pressed myself against him and told him
how manly he was.

How manly? Seriously? What kind of lame ass line was that to use on my
godfather of all people?

"I really think you're going to like this movie, Ness," my boyfriend Nahuel said
next to me, interrupting my inner rant. I smiled sickly at him before turning my
head to look out the window of the car.

We were driving into Port Angeles for a movie then dinner. I'd planned on
staying with Nahuel last night at his apartment in Seattle, but that idea got
nixed because Jenny had called me and told me Jacob seemed upset after his
doctor's appointment. So naturally, I freaking had to drop everything to rush
right back to Jake. Then I practically had sex with him this morning right before
my devoted boyfriend picked me up for our date.

What the hell had I been thinking?

But that was the problem. I hadn't been thinking. I always seemed to suffer a
severe case of stupidity whenever I got around Jacob Black. I never looked at
the big picture. It had been that way for as long as I could remember.

I couldn't think of a time when a part of me hadn't loved Jake. He was like a
force of nature: beautiful, mysterious…and devastating if you didn't respect the
power. When I was a little kid, Jacob had been my friend…an unofficial uncle
who would sneak candy to me when I wasn't supposed to have any. I hero-
worshipped him. No man on Earth could ever compare to my Jacob. And then
somewhere around the time I turned eight, I developed my first big crush.

While all my friends worshipped movie stars and members of the latest boy
band, I would pretend that I was going to marry Jake. At that age, I didn't even
really understand what I was feeling, but I knew it was strong. When I'd play
with my Barbies I would pretend that my Ken doll was Jake and I was Barbie,
and I made my dolls kiss and have sex…a lot.

When I hit puberty though, that's when things turned into an outright
obsession. For some reason, I developed a horrific shyness around Jacob that
lasted from ages 11 to 12. When he'd speak to me, my face would always turn
bright red. It was obvious that I liked him, but he never teased me about it or
made me feel awkward. And I absolutely adored him for that. Sadly for me
though, he never once saw me as anything but a child.

I still cringe when I think back to how I acted on his wedding day. I had naively
believed that I would confess my love for him and he would immediately cancel
the wedding. I was so childishly stupid.

Jacob broke my heart that day and a part of me never recovered. Before his
wedding, I had convinced myself that I would someday be Mrs. Jacob Black. I'd
felt so ridiculously betrayed when I had learned that Jake not only slept with
Leah and had gotten her pregnant, but that he'd also been willing to marry her
instead of me. That had been unforgivable to my young teenage heart.

I still didn't know where I'd found the courage to speak to Jacob right before his
wedding. I'd hid outside the room he had been getting ready in for five minutes
before I finally walked in and begged him to wait for me to grow up. And what
did I get in return? A kiss on the head and a promise that I'd make someone
else a lucky man someday.

I sat through his wedding with my chin up. Hell, I even danced with him at his
reception. He'd walked over to me, held out his hand, and said, "How bout it,
Ness?" And I plastered on a bright smile, got up from my chair, and danced
with him. He had tried to make small talk with me and I'd pretended like I
didn't give a damn. But to be that close to him and know that he would never
be mine had devastated me. Especially as I knew he was about to leave for his
honeymoon to the whore he'd married.

To say that I hated Leah is an understatement. She's always been a cold,

calculating, heartless bitch. She never loved Jacob anymore than he loved her.
Their marriage had been for their baby's sake…at least on Jacob's end of
things. I think when Leah saw Jake she saw a human cash register. In my
deepest, darkest thoughts, I sometimes wondered if she had gotten pregnant
on purpose so that he would have to marry her.

The feelings of dislike between Leah and I were entirely mutual too. Leah hated
me just as much as I disliked her. She used to go out of her way to either
ignore me or make snide remarks which she'd direct at me. She constantly
pointed out the age difference between Jacob and myself and would refer to
me as "the child." What finally drew the line for me though and pushed my
dislike for Leah into absolute loathing was my 20th birthday party.

It had been hard for me to be around Jacob after he had gotten married. He
was my parents' best friend and my godfather. He had been nothing more than
a kind friend to me my entire life. But I couldn't be around him after his
wedding. It hurt too much, so I avoided him as much as I could. I wasn't able to
avoid him at my party though. Unfortunately for me, he brought Leah with him.
It was during my party that Leah confronted me and put the final wedge into
Jacob's and my relationship…

"Jake's coming to the party tonight," my mother told me.

"Oh?" I replied casually, trying to control my suddenly pounding heart.

"Are you okay with that?" She asked.

My mom always saw too much. After Jake's wedding reception, I'd gone into
my room after we had gotten home and cried my eyes out. My mom had given
me an hour to myself before coming into my room, pulling me into her arms,
and hugging me while I sobbed.

"I'm fine," I answered her question. "I have to go get dressed."

Knowing that Jake was going to be there, I took extra time getting ready for my
party. I pulled my hair back into an elegant twist with a few loose tendrils for
added sophistication. The dress was something my Aunt Alice had bought for
me in Seattle. It was a purple cocktail dress with a black sequined overlay on
the skirt and a large black satin bow that went around the waist and tied in the
back. It was the most beautiful dress I'd ever owned. For my makeup, I added
dark purple eyeshadow and heavy black eyeliner. My father's eyes almost
popped out of his head when he saw me, but my mother just smiled
sentimentally. The party was in full swing when Jake and Leah made an
appearance.

"Ness, you look beautiful," Jake said, his eyes running over my figure briefly
before he leaned in to kiss my cheek. "Where'd my little girl go?"

"It's called growing up, Jacob," I replied stiffly. His eyebrows shot up at my
tone.

"Why Renesmee, don't you look absolutely adorable," Leah remarked, her tone
belittling. "That dress is just so sweet. It's perfect for such a young girl."

Bitch.

I looked at what Leah was wearing. She had on a dress that was bright red,
fitted in a way that left nothing to the imagination, and was way too short.

"I love your dress too," I replied, smiling brightly. "Though I think it's kind of
sad and pathetic when womenof your age try to hold onto their youth by
dressing younger than their years."

With that, I turned and walked away, smiling as I heard Jake snort behind me.
He quickly tried to cover it with a cough, but it still made me grin. An hour
later, the smile was gone and I was beginning to feel drained. I had opened up
my presents and cut the birthday cake. Now the dancing had begun. My
parents lived in an old Victorian mansion about an hour west of Seattle. It
came with everything you could imagine from that era of architecture,
including a ballroom, library, and study.

I danced with several friends and slow danced with a couple of guys I knew.
Mike Newton came up to me and asked me to dance for a second time. Mike
worked as a receptionist at my dad's office. He was paying his way through
college and was about my age. I was dancing and talking amicably to him
when I felt eyes on me. I looked across the room and saw Jacob staring back at
me. He was looking at me intensely. Though the lights in the ballroom had
been dimmed, I could still see his expression. He was looking at me in away
that I had never seen before. It was almost predatory, causing me to shiver.
His eyes narrowed at my reaction. He took a hesitant step towards me, but
Leah suddenly appeared and whispered something in his ear. He nodded and
they disappeared soon after.

I finished my dance with Mike and rejoined my friends. Feeling depressed and
tired of putting on a happy front, I excused myself a half hour later and made
my way to the library. What I needed was a quiet place to think. What did
Jacob's expression mean? I opened the heavy oak door to the room and
entered, freezing at the sight before my eyes.

Jacob was zipping up his pants. Leah was sitting on the edge of my father's
desk, pulling on her panties. Both looked sweaty, their hair mussed. Jake's
head shot up as soon as he saw me.

"Ness-" He started to say, taking a step towards me, while tucking in his shirt.

"I-I'm sorry," I whispered, taking a step back while shaking my head in

disbelief. I turned and headed down the hall. I made my way into the formal
dining room and grabbed the back of one of the chairs, gripping it until my
knuckles turned white.

"I apologize for what you just saw." I looked over and saw Leah standing in the
doorframe of the room.

"Jacob's worried that he might have upset you given your obvious crush on
him," Leah said, looking down at her manicured nails as though bored by my
very presence.

"I don't know what you mean," I replied, my cheeks flushing in embarrassment.

"Oh come on, Renesmee," Leah answered, looking up and giving me an

assessing look. "Normally Jacob finds your little puppy dog devotion amusing,
but you looked so absolutely devastated just now, he's concerned that he
ruined your birthday."
"He has nothing to worry about." I raised my chin defiantly.

"Good." Leah smiled, reminding me of a snake before it's about to strike. "Then
let me give you some friendly advice. While your obvious feelings for Jacob
have been endearing in the past, it's becoming uncomfortable for both my
husband and myself to have to endure them. I would suggest that you move on
and try to find someone else your own age. Jacob is out of your league, dear.
Do I make myself clear?"

"Perfectly," I responded sickly. Leah gave me another cold smile and left.

I took Leah's advice to heart too. I went out of my way to forget Jacob. He and
Leah left the party soon after my little talk with her. He didn't even say
goodbye. Later that night, I gave my virginity to Mike Newton. When it was
over, I cried like a baby. As for Jacob, I didn't see him again until the accident.

As far as I was concerned, Jacob's behavior was reprehensible. I'd been

humiliated by the one person I had given my heart completely to. I'd loved him
for half my life, and per Leah, he thought it was laughable. From that point on, I
did everything I could to put Jacob firmly in the past. I met Nahuel a year ago
and began dating him. I was able to successfully keep Jacob out of my life. I did
everything I could to avoid him and my parents didn't push me to socialize with
him.

He would still be out of my life if it hadn't been for the accident. I couldn't stop
myself from running to see him as soon as I found out he had been injured. His
battered and bruised body had almost been too much for me to take. I had
wept heartbrokenly next to his bed for two days. When he had finally stirred, I
romantically deluded myself into believing I was the reason. And then he
opened his mouth and called me, Bella. Even injured and half out of it, Jacob
didn't want me. So I left before he knew I was even there.

I still wasn't sure how my mom talked me into overseeing Jake's care. Perhaps
my hopeless love for Jake had turned me into a masochist over the years. I
tried to rationalize and figure out why I would give into helping him after trying
to pretend he didn't exist for so long. Maybe I had developed a God complex.
The sight of his broken body had made me want to rush in and save him.
Maybe I just felt sorry for him because his horror of a wife finally left him. I
could question my motives until I was blue in the face, but the sad pathetic
truth was I feared that my true reason for wanting to help was because I was
irreversibly in love with Jacob still. I had a feeling that I would be in love with
him for the rest of my life.

"Ness, we're here," Nahuel said, interrupting my thoughts again.

I looked out the window and saw that we were sitting in the parking lot of the
movie theater. I glanced over at Nahuel and saw him staring at me with a
concerned look. I put a bright smile on my face and saw him relax in return. He
got out of the car and walked over to my side, opening the door for me. I got
out and lightly brushed my lips against his. He cupped the back of my neck,
deepening the kiss, before letting go. He then grabbed my hand and we walked
into the movies.

I watched him as he bought our tickets and popcorn. Nahuel was good for me.
In fact, he was too good for me. He was everything that Jacob was not. He
made me laugh, he cared for me, and best of all, he loved me. And the sex was
amazing. There was only one fault that Nahuel had.

He wasn't Jacob.

He didn't make my heart skip just by looking at him. I didn't long to hear his
voice when he wasn't around. Usually, it was out of sight, out of mind when it
came to Nahuel. I knew that I loved him. The problem was that it wasn't with
the intensity that I had always felt for Jacob. It was a healthier love though.
Jacob was a sick, obsessive delusion. Nahuel was the better choice for me.

"Ready?" He asked, his dark eyes looking at me inquisitively.

"Yeah." I nodded, taking the sodas he got us and walking into the theater.

I watched the movie but nothing registered. I couldn't stop thinking of what
happened earlier at Jake's place. If Jenny hadn't come upstairs, would I have
slept with him? It would have been a fantasy years in the making. When I was a
kid, I used to practice kissing on my hand, pretending it was Jacob's lips. And
when I started dating as a teen, I would imagine Jake kissing me instead of my
boyfriend.

Why did he have such a hold on me? I was nothing to him now except perhaps
a convenience. Before I moved in with him, he saw me as a little girl. Now…I
wasn't sure.

I knew Jacob was worried about his ability to have sex. It was obvious what I
had walked into the day I caught him watching porn. I also saw his reaction
when I helped him in the shower. What he didn't know was that I wanted to see
if I could make him react. After all, what did porn stars have that I didn't? So I'd
deliberately stepped into the shower without turning the water off first. I made
sure that my nightgown got wet. And Jake reacted. His eyes had widened and
before I knew it, he was turning away from me. But not before I saw what had
happened to him. Which made me wonder about this morning on the couch.
Was he attracted to me, or was it because I made it so easy for him?
I didn't want to go down that road again. I was playing Russian roulette with my
heart and it had to stop. I had Nahuel. He was safe. I couldn't risk falling in love
with Jacob all over again. That path had offered me nothing but heartache.

With that thought in mind, I laid my head on Nahuel's shoulder and kept it
there until the end of the movie. Once the credits began to roll, we left the
theater and headed to a diner for a light supper. After we ordered drinks,
Nahuel put his hand out in front of him, laying it on the table with the palm
facing up. Smiling at him, I put my hand in his, letting our fingers entwine.

"So what did you think of the movie?" Nahuel asked. I loved the sound of his
voice, he had been in the States for 10 years now, but he still had a sexy
accent.

"It was good," I replied. I actually couldn't remember one detail of the movie.

"I loved the scene where the guy killed the werewolf. That was really intense,
huh?" Nahuel questioned.

I had no idea so I nodded. "Mmhmm."

Nahuel chuckled. "Did you even pay attention to the movie?"

"Of course I did," I instantly responded. When he gave me a knowing look, I

sighed. "No, I'm sorry. I wasn't paying attention. I have a lot on my mind right
now."

Nahuel hesitated before he nodded his head in understanding.

"Have you been giving some more thought to what we discussed yesterday?"
He asked hopefully.

Nahuel and I had been in the middle of a very serious discussion yesterday
when Jenny had called me about Jake. Truth be told, I was glad for the
interruption at the time. Now, it looked like the conversation was back on.

"Nahuel…I love you," I told him. "I…I'm just not sure if I'm ready for marriage
yet. I want to finish school first and get my career going before I can even
begin to think about marriage."

Disappointment flashed across Nahuel's face. He let go of my hand, putting his

on the seat next to him.

"Does this have anything to do with your godfather?" He wondered after

several awkward moments.

My face flushed guiltily. "What do you mean?"

"Let's just say that he wasn't exactly welcoming today when I came to pick you
up for our date."

"That's just Jacob." I shrugged. "He told my dad that he'd watch out for me
while I was living there and he takes that responsibility seriously."

"Are you sure that's all?" Nahuel carefully inspected my face.

"Why do you ask?" I questioned casually.

"What is that expression? I felt like I was in a pissing contest when speaking
with him earlier. You might not be interested in him, but he seems possessive
of you."

"You're exaggerating," I replied, ignoring the butterflies in my stomach.

"If you say so," Nahuel retorted, sitting back to look out the window. "If I'm
wrong and he isn't interested, then he's a prick."

"He's not a prick," I responded, instantly defensive. "He's just not himself right
now. Jacob's depressed and scared that he'll never walk again so he acts out.
You should have met him before the accident. He was so confident and funny.
Now he's angry all the time. But he's not a prick."

Nahuel didn't say anything. Our food was soon delivered and we ate for several
minutes in silence. I felt his eyes on me several times, but when I tried to make
eye contact, he'd look away.

"So…I assume you are rejecting my proposal," Nahuel finally said.

"I'm not rejecting it," I told him. "I just want to postpone getting engaged right
now."

"Fine," he replied, looking so despondent I had to blink away my tears before

he saw them.

He took his napkin and wiped his mouth before he said, "I need to get an early
start tomorrow and I'm staying at your Grandpa Cullen's tonight. I was hoping
to talk to him a little bit about how my residency is going before he goes to
bed. Is it all right if I take you back now?"

"Sure," I replied, swallowing over the lump in my throat. Nahuel paid for the bill
and we left, driving the hour back to La Push in more strained silence.

"Will you call me tomorrow and let me know you got home safe?" I asked once
we got back to Jake's house.

"Yes." Nahuel nodded. I leaned close to him and felt him cup my cheeks in his
hands. His lips brushed my mouth once, twice, before he let me go.
"Sweet dreams, Nessie," Nahuel whispered.

"You too…I love you," I told him.

"I love you too," he responded.

I got out of the car and watched him pull out of the driveway. My shoulders
slumped as soon as he was out of sight. What the hell was wrong with me?
Why didn't I just say yes?

Images of Jacob flashed through my mind and I sighed. Rubbing my forehead in

an attempt to relieve the sudden tension I was experiencing, I turned around
and pulled my key out of my purse. I wondered briefly if Jacob would be up. It
was only 9 PM. I didn't know if I wanted to see him right now; not after my
lousy evening with Nahuel. I also wasn't sure if I trusted myself to be around
him, especially as Jenny had made arrangements to go out with some friends
tonight and wouldn't be back until Monday morning.

As quietly as possible, I let myself inside. I was greeted by the very drunk
singing of Jacob Black. Feeling my mouth drop, I slowly walked over to the
living room area where the noise was coming from, though I couldn't see Jake.
Peeping around the couch, I found him lying on the floor. The back of his head
was against the bottom of the couch, his chin on his chest. There was an empty
bottle of Jim Beam next to him and a half empty bottle of rum in his hand. He
was singing something that was either incoherent or in Quileute. Either way I
couldn't understand him.

"Jacob?" I questioned in an unsure tone.

He stopped singing for a moment and cocked his head to the side as though he
imagined my voice.

"Jake," I repeated.

He turned his head and looked over at me, a smile breaking out on his face.

"Hey dere, Nessipoo!" Jacob slurred. I shook my head. He was hammered!

I went over and picked the rum and empty Jim Beam bottle up, walking over to
the kitchen counter, where I placed them both.

"Having a little party?" I asked.

"Yep," he replied with the "p" making a popping sound. "Had too. You left me
all needy and alone."

I froze for a minute before walking back over to him. "You are going to be sooo
hung over tomorrow."
"I neber get hung ober," Jacob replied, pointing his finger at me for added
emphasis.

"C'mon big boy, we've got to get you to bed," I said, wheeling his chair over to
him.

"Nessie, are you invitin' me to bed?" Jacob asked, his chin resting on his chest
again.

"You think you'd be in any condition to have me in your bed?" I questioned and
then instantly cursed myself for flirting.

"Hell yeah I could," Jacob replied, suddenly sitting up. "You want me to poove
it?"

"No," I replied. "C'mon."

I bent down and wrapped my arms around his waist. It took us several tries, but
I was finally able to get him in his chair. I started to walk behind him.

"What are you doin'?" Jacob wondered, turning his head to look at me.

"I was going to help push your chair."

"I don't need your help, tanks," Jacob stated. He grabbed the wheels of the
chair and began to maneuver himself around the furniture. I was impressed
that he managed until he drove himself straight into the hallway wall.

"Fuck! Where'd dat come from? That's what I get for drinkin' and dribing," he
stated right before he broke out into giggles. I covered my own laugh with my
hand. I never thought I'd live to see the day when Jacob Black, Mr. Masculinity,
freaking giggled.

He turned and looked at me very seriously then. "Well, what da hell you
standing dere for? Aren't you gonna help me?"

"Sure, sure." I nodded, struggling to keep my face straight.

I went over to him and grabbed the handles of his chair before pushing him
towards his room. Once we got in, I let go of the chair to turn on the lamp next
to his bed. When I turned around, it was to find him watching me closely.

"Did you sleep with that dick tonight?" He asked, suddenly angry.

"How is that any of your business?" I snapped back. I went to walk by him but
he grabbed my wrist and yanked me down on his lap.

"Did you?" He questioned again, his face inches from mine.

"No," I whispered. He searched my eyes for a moment before moving his head
even closer to me.

"Nessie," Jacob murmured right before he brought his lips to mine.

The kiss was hesitant at first, almost exploratory in nature. Jacob was learning
the feel of my mouth as I was learning his. His bottom lip was fuller than his top
and before I could stop myself, I captured it with my lips, sucking on the plump
skin. Jake groaned in response. Our mouths turned hungry then, each greedy
for more. His hand reached up and clasped the back of my neck before his
fingers moved through my hair. I could feel his fingers wrap around the
strands, holding me to him. My own arm wrapped around his back so that I
could press myself against him.

Jacob's tongue suddenly jutted out, running along the seam of my lips, before
purging forward to caress the inside of my mouth. I shivered as I felt our
tongues meet. I couldn't believe I was kissing Jacob.

I was kissing Jacob Black.

I froze for a minute before breaking away as reality set in. I was kissing Jacob.
That wouldn't be happening if he wasn't drunk off his ass. And I knew he was
drunk. I could taste the alcohol he had consumed in my mouth.

"Wass wrong?" Jacob murmured, brushing his lips against mine once more
causing me to tremble in need. I hesitated, wanting to give into temptation, but
I couldn't do it.

"Jake...you're drunk."

"I've neber felt more sober in my life," he answered.

"Sure," I sighed, getting up off his lap.

"Ness, don't," Jacob begged, reaching up and putting both hands on my waist,
pulling me back to him so that he could nuzzle his face against my stomach.
"Do you hab any idere what you do to me?"

Letting my masochistic side take over, I asked. "What?"

"You make me tink tings that would make Edward shoot me. Bells told me
Eddie was a shitty shot and dat it would probably hurt," Jake said in a
completely serious tone. I looked up at the ceiling and pressed my lips together
in a vain attempt not to laugh out loud.

My giddiness drained away when Jacob continued, "You make me wish dat I
was ten years younger so dat I could be allowed to feel dis way about you."
"How do you feel?" I asked against my better judgment.

He looked up at me in confusion. "You're so amazing and beautiful and funny.

And I really really like you. And I hate dat you're dating that mutter fucker. And
I-I want you so much dat it drives me crazy sometimes. And I tink about you all
da time. I tink that I'm becoming addicted to you, Ness."

"Jake," I whispered regretfully. "Why don't we get you into bed?"

"Will you stay wit me?" He questioned, his eyes blazing. I bit my lip before
nodding slowly.

Jacob moved his wheelchair to the side of the bed. I went over and wrapped my
arm around his waist. Together we were able to get him onto the mattress. He
pushed himself so that he was lying across the middle of the bed. Smiling at
me, he laid back and closed his eyes.

My heart debated with my head. Did I want to go through with this? If I stayed
with Jake tonight, what would he say when he was thinking more clearly
tomorrow? My head started screaming at me to run, that I had Nahuel. My
heart was reminding that I was moments away from sleeping with the guy the
man of my dreams. Decision made, I crawled onto the bed next to him.

"Jake, you want the truth?" I asked, not meeting his eyes. "I think that I might
like you too. In fact, I-I don't think I ever stopped loving you."

I looked at him expectantly. He snored in response.

"Jake?" I put my hands on his chest and gave him a little shake. He mumbled
incoherently and then snored again.

Laughing in disbelief, I put my forehead against his chest and closed my eyes.
So much for that idea. I moved myself into the nook of his arm and placed my
head over his heart. I stayed there for several minutes, enjoying the feel of his
chest rising up and down against my cheek.

Sighing, I finally pulled myself away. Carefully rolling him, I pulled the sheet
and bedspread out from beneath him and covered him as best as I could,
considering he was lying sideways on the mattress. Once he was situated, I
crawled back next to him and hovered over him for a moment.

"Goodnight Jacob," I murmured, leaning down to kiss his lips lightly one more
time.

With that, I got off the bed and turned out the light before heading out the
room, shutting the door quietly behind me.

Chapter 7 – Something Fishy

Jacob's POV

I woke up feeling sicker than I'd ever felt in my entire life.

I was pretty sure that there were a hundred oompa-loompas break-dancing

inside my head. I was also confident that my eyeballs were going to explode
from the daylight I could feel streaming through my bedroom windows. My
stomach felt like it had been turned inside out. And I had the strangest taste in
my mouth…like I'd sucked the ass out of a dead horse.

What the fuck happened last night?

I remembered drinking the Jim Beam and then thinking it would be a good idea
to drink some rum. After that, I had no idea what the hell happened. I sat up
and instantly groaned as the room spun sickeningly around me. Laying back
down, I cautiously opened my eyes and then immediately shut them as pain
shot across the back of my eyeballs.

With the pain, images flashed through my brain. Images of Ness…of holding
her against me…of kissing her.

My stomach rolled as I hurried over to the side of my bed and grabbed the
small waste receptacle that was there. I hurled whatever remained of last
night's contents into the trash. When I was done, I carefully placed the now
saturated bucket on the floor, before moving to lie on my back again. Jenny
was going to be pissed at me for that one.

I frowned as I stared at the ceiling. Did I really kiss Renesmee last night or was
it part of an alcohol-induced hallucination? It felt real, but the memory was so
foggy that I couldn't tell if it was just wishful thinking on my end or not.

After lying in bed for another hour and emptying out my stomach one more
time, I shakily got into my wheelchair. Holding my breath, I grabbed the soiled
wastebasket and rolled myself into the bathroom. I quickly emptied my mess in
the toilet before making my way into the shower. I stayed under the warm
spray until the water began to cool. Feeling slightly more human, I got dressed
in some cut-off shorts and a gray t-shirt and made my way into the kitchen.
Ness was sitting at the kitchen island, cradling a warm coffee mug in between
her hands. She smiled hesitantly when she saw me.

"Good morning, Jacob."

"Hey Ness," I said, unsure how to approach her. "Did…uh…did I say or do

anything inappropriate last night?"

"You don't remember?" She asked, raising an eyebrow at me.

"My memory's a little cloudy last night," I admitted sheepishly. I looked at her
and asked again, "So…did I?"

Ness frowned as she looked at her coffee. She finally raised her eyes and said,
"No…you didn't do anything wrong."

"But you did help me into bed, right?"

Ness got up off the stool she'd been sitting on, grabbed a cup out of the
cupboard, and filled it with coffee before handing it to me.

"I came home, found you singing on the floor, and I wheeled you into your
room."

"And that was it?" I persisted.

"That was it," she confirmed, emptying out her remanding coffee in the sink.
"Listen, will you be okay if I take off for awhile? I need to do some errands in
Forks and then I'm going to go fishing with Grandpa Charlie."

"Charlie, huh? I haven't seen him in ages. How's he doing?" I asked, my eyes
lingering on her profile as she grabbed a dishcloth and wiped at a coffee stain
on the counter.

"He's good," Ness replied, before looking at me unsurely. "Would uh…would

you like to come with me? I know Grandpa would be happy to see you."

Given the choice between being in the house alone with nothing but my
hangover for company or getting to spend some time with Ness that wasn't
required physical therapy, the choice was easy.

"Yeah, fishing with Charlie sounds good."

"Okay then," Ness said. "I'm going to go get dressed. You should eat some
bread. It will help soak up any lasting alcohol in your stomach."

I chuckled. "Thanks for the tip."

My amusement faded though as I watched her leave the kitchen. I felt like I
was still missing something. I couldn't shake off the feeling that I had really
kissed her last night. And I was pretty sure that we both enjoyed it.

Ness came back a half hour later, her hair damp from her recent shower. She
was wearing a form fitting pink and yellow flannel button down shirt with khaki
shorts. She also had on dark brown leather sandals. She was dressed for
comfort, yet she had never looked so sexy.

"What?" Ness asked, as she caught me looking at her.

"You look really nice," I told her, my eyes lingering on her curvy figure.

"Thanks," Ness replied, for some reason blushing. "Are you ready to go?"

"Let me just grab some shoes," I said. I rolled myself into my bedroom and
grabbed some sporty sandals. Putting shoes on usually depressed me. Knowing
that I'd never get a chance to walk in them again made them seem pointless.
But today, I didn't really mind.

After finishing getting ready, I went back into the living room where Ness was
waiting for me.

"Okay, let's get going," I told her. We got into my Escalade and headed towards
Forks.

"You know," Ness said from the driver's seat. "You could always try driving
again."

"Don't you need functioning legs for that?" I half-joked.

Nessie frowned in response. "There are ways for you to drive. You just have to
figure which method works best for you. I'll look into it for you, if you want."

"Sure, thanks," I replied, turning my head so that I could stare at the delicate
side of her face. "So how'd it go with the boyfriend last night?"

Ness's cheeks suddenly flamed and she looked strangely guilty.

"It went fine. We went to the movies and then had a light dinner."

"See anything good?" I questioned.

"I don't know. It was some kind of werewolf movie," Nessie replied.

"That doesn't sound like your kind of thing," I said knowingly. "Doesn't he know
what kind of movies you like?"

"I'm into werewolf movies," she said defensively.

I snorted. "Since when?"

"Maybe you just don't know me as well as you think you do," Ness stated
matter-of-factually.

I stiffened a little at that. As much as I wanted to deny it, I had to admit that I
didn't know Renesmee anymore. She had grown up and away from me, turning
into the fascinating woman before me.

"Maybe I need to get to know you again," I murmured quietly.

Ness pulled in the parking lot of a drug store and parked the car. Turning, she
looked at me for a moment before saying, "Why?"

"Shouldn't I know my god-daughter?" I asked the first thing that popped in my

head and cringed.

I didn't want to keep putting her in that category. That was the area where
there were age differences and inappropriate thoughts about her mother. I was
startled to realize how little I had been thinking of Bella lately.

Ness looked down at the seat and frowned. "Yeah, I guess it's important that
you get to know me again since you're my godfather. Sure."

She got out of the car and reached back to grab her purse.

"I'm going to run in and run out," she told me. "Did you want to stay here?"

"Okay," I responded and grimaced when she slammed the door in my face. The
oompa-loompas were now doing the conga.

What the hell happened last night? My mind went over the events of last night
again. Ness said nothing had happened…or did she say I didn't do anything
inappropriately? I closed my eyes and tried to remember.

I think that I'm becoming addicted to you, Ness.

I jolted up. Did I really say that? Oh God and if I did, what was her response?

I eyed her carefully as Ness made her way back to the car. She got behind the
wheel and threw a small package down between us before starting the engine.
She kept her eyes off me the entire time. I glanced down at her package and
saw through the plastic bag that she had picked up a prescription for birth
control. Jealousy shot through my body, making me careless.

"Ness, did I kiss you last night?" I asked flat out.

I watched with interest as the wheel jerked in her hand.

"I told you. Nothing inappropriate happened last night," she reminded me.

"That wasn't what I asked."

Her shoulders, which were rim-rod straight, suddenly sagged slightly.

"Yes, you kissed me," she admitted.

My eyes were glued to her face, which was fluctuating between looking very
pale to beet red.

"Did I also tell you that I was addicted to you?" I whispered.

Ness froze again before laughing shrilly. "Don't worry Jacob, I knew you were
drunk."

I wanted to pursue the conversation further, but it was apparent that

Renesmee didn't.

Sighing, I said, "I'm sorry, Ness. I hope I didn't make you uncomfortable or
anything."

"You were fine. Don't worry about it," she replied.

We drove in awkward silence to Charlie's house. Charlie came out of the house
to greet us as soon as we pulled up.

"Hey Peanut," he said to Ness before shaking my hand. "Jake, it's been a long
time."

"Hey Charlie," I returned.

Charlie was a man of few words. He had been like that for as long as I could
remember. I knew Bella worried about her dad. He was sixty-two, living alone,
with nothing but his job as chief of police to occupy his time. I always thought
Bella underestimated her dad though. Charlie seemed pretty content with his
lot in life.

"So you ready to go fishing, Ness?" Her grandfather asked.

"Yeah," she replied before glancing at me. "Is it okay if Jake comes?"

"Of course," Charlie said, smiling at me. "I don't think we've been fishing since
you and Bella were in high school."

I shifted uncomfortably. I saw Ness stare at me inquisitively. I began to pray to

whichever god was listening that Charlie wouldn't continue with his trip down
memory lane. All I needed was for him to blurt out that I had once been
involved with Ness's mother. I wasn't sure how Ness would respond to that
news, but I had a feeling it wouldn't be good.

"So what we fishing today Charlie?" I asked in a desperate attempt to change

the subject.

"Trout," he replied before going into his garage and coming out with a couple
extra fishing poles.

"Peanut, which pole do you want?" Charlie asked Renesmee.

"Yeah Ness, which pole do you want?" I repeated in a suggestive tone. When
Ness looked over at me, I wiggled my eyebrows at her. She rolled her eyes in
response.
"My usual, Grandpa," Ness replied.

"Are you sure you don't want to try something new?" I questioned and
suddenly the conversation was no longer about fishing equipment.

"No, I'm perfectly happy with the one I use," Ness answered.

"Are you positive? Don't you want to catch the prize fish?"

Ness's face became frosty. "I'm perfectly satisfied with the pole I've been
given. If I switched, I probably end up getting nothing but muck and seaweed."

She walked away with her nose slightly in the air. I had to smile. God, she was
something…brains, brawn, and beauty all rolled into one.

We piled into Charlie's truck and headed out to a small lake that Charlie
preferred to fish in. Ness helped him unload the rowboat from the truck trailer
while I sat uselessly nearby. I found myself staring at Ness's ass as she bent
down to put the boat next to the water's edge. She turned around abruptly and
caught me staring.

Raising an eyebrow at me, she walked over to me as Charlie went to unload

the gear from the truck.

"Let me help you get into the boat."

"I can do it," I exclaimed indignantly.

"Fine," Ness replied, crossing her arms over her chest.

I rolled myself over to the rocky beach. The wheels of the chair instantly began
to sink. Fuck!

"Need help yet?" Ness asked innocently.

"I've got it," I gritted.

Using strength I didn't know I possessed, I managed to finally get myself over
to the boat. I threw Ness a triumphant look. She rolled her eyes in return.
Perching myself at the edge of my chair, I lifted up to pull myself into the boat.
Unfortunately, the boat wasn't secured well. It rocked away from me causing
me to fall into the water with a humiliating splash.

"You okay there, Jacob?" Charlie asked from his truck. I could barely hear him
over Nessie's laughter.

"I'm fine," I sat up, water running down my face. My shirt and shorts were
drenched while my legs remained on dry land.
I gave Ness a mock glare. "You think this is funny?"

She covered her mouth with her hand and nodded. I could still hear her
giggling.

"You want to help me now?" I asked.

"Help? As in someone assisting you with something?" She asked precociously.

"Just help me before I begin to chafe," I ordered.

Still laughing, Ness walked over to me and bent down to help lift me back into
my chair. As soon as she got close enough, I grabbed her waist and threw her
sideways into the water.

She came up from beneath the surface next to me and shrieked, "Jake!"

"Not so funny now that the shoe's on the other foot, is it?" I told her with a
smirk, rolling myself so that I could place an elbow on either side of her.

"You are such a jerk," she said, propping herself on her elbows to get her hair
out of the water. All the action did was bring our faces closer. My eyes drifted
to her lips. What would it be like to kiss her with both of us aware of what we
were doing? I felt myself inching closer to her.

Ness's eyes widened before she turned her head slightly.

"You smell like fish," she said, slightly breathless.

I bent my head so that I could nuzzle her neck with my nose.

"So do you," I replied lowly, my lips brushing her neck. I heard her suck in her
breath.

"Uh…you two planning on fishing today?" Charlie asked awkwardly. I rolled

over and saw him looking at both of us with something akin to shock in his
eyes.

"Yeah…sorry Grandpa," Ness said, pushing at my chest. I rolled off her and she
quickly got up.

"There are some spare towels in the back of the truck, Ness," Charlie told her.

"Okay, thanks." She hurried away without looking at me. I tried but failed to
keep my thoughts G-rated as I saw Ness's wet t-shirt cling to her body.

Charlie looked back at me with a distressed expression written on his face.

"Something going on between you two that I should know about?" Charlie
asked.
"No," I replied a little too quickly.

Charlie's eyebrows snapped together. "Jacob…she's a lot younger than you."

"I'm well aware of that," I grumbled.

"Hell, you practically helped raise her."

"I'm aware of that too," I sighed.

Charlie looked at me then back at Ness, who was drying her hair while
watching us. We had been speaking too low for her to hear our conversation.

Charlie looked thoughtful for a minute before shrugging. "Okay then."

"Charlie-"

"It's none of my business, Jacob. I just wanted to make sure you were aware of
the consequences of whatever is happening between you two. This is either
going to end very good or very bad."

He reached down and wrapped an arm around my waist. Together, we were

able to get me into the boat. Ness came over and handed me a towel.

"Thanks," I said, deliberately brushing my fingers against hers. Her eyes flared
for a moment before she pulled away.

"Hopefully Jacob didn't scare the fish away with his acrobatics, huh?" Ness
joked to her grandfather.

"We'll go to the other side of the lake and try there," Charlie assured her.

Charlie hopped in the middle of the boat. I was sitting in the bow. Ness looked
at me then took the seat on the stern side. Sighing quietly, I tried not to stare
too often in her direction as Charlie began to row us across the water.

I tried to understand Ness's hot and cold behavior. It must be disturbing for her
to suddenly be hit on by her godfather. It was creepy to me too. But there was
something between us. Maybe there always had been, but I'd been too blind to
see it for obvious reasons. Ness had only ever been Bella's daughter to me. I
never saw her as anything else until recently.

Another reason Ness might keep her distance from me was because of lover
boy. I knew how loyal Ness was. She had been dating the dickhead for a long
time. If we kissed and flirted, that would play on Ness's conscience. I frowned
as I stared out at the water.

At one time, Nessie had given me her heart and I had rejected it. Now, I'd do
anything for a chance with her. Whether it was right or wrong.
I wondered briefly what Bella and Edward would say if they knew of my
growing conflicted feelings for their daughter. I look at Charlie, remembering
his reaction. He had been stunned to see our flirtatious behavior. He'd been
quick to point the obvious facts…Ness was too young for me and practically
family. They were major concerns for me too.

But…how could it be so wrong, when everything in me was telling me that what

Ness and I had together was so right? Even paralyzed and with my future
unknown, Ness made me happier than I'd been in years. I hadn't even been
this happy when I was involved with Bella. What we had couldn't be wrong.

I looked over and found her staring at me. Her face was etched in concern.

"Are you okay?" She mouthed behind Charlie's back. I nodded and smiled. Ness
smiled back and closed her eyes, tilting her face up to the sky.

It was a rare sunny day in Forks. I watched as the sun highlighted her bronze
hair, giving it a fiery glow. Her flawless skin shimmered under the bright
natural light. She turned her head just slightly and it suddenly hit me like a
wrecking ball.

Fuck! I was falling in love with my god-daughter!

It wasn't just mere physical attraction. It wasn't even a case of me liking her.
The feelings were more profound then that. I had been falling in love with her
since the night of her 20th birthday party. She had literally taken my breath
away that night, she'd been so beautiful. However, at the time, I was trying to
still resolve my feelings for Bella as well as deal with my growing failure of a
marriage to Leah. But I'd struggled to keep my eyes off of her all night. When I
saw her dancing with a co-worker of Edward's, I'd wanted to punch the guy
because she wasn't dancing with me. And then I made the mistake of sleeping
with Leah at Ness's party. I'd closed my eyes and pretended I was making love
to Ness, and before I knew it, Nessie had walked in on us.

I lost her after that night. I didn't see her again until the accident. It wasn't for
lack of trying on my part either. I had started making excuses to visit Bella and
Edward on the off chance that Ness would be there. She never was. I tried
calling her a few times, but she never answered.

I should have realized what was going on with me emotionally. Her rejection
had hurt more than my own wife's indifference. And then when I had gotten
injured, I had been more upset about the idea that Ness hadn't come to see
me, than I was about the fact that Bella hadn't been there when I first got hurt.
That right there should have been an indicator of my shift in emotions.

I had held onto my love for Bella for more years than I could count because it
was a safe love. I had fooled myself into thinking that Bella was the one that
got away. I had held onto the fantasy that she was an unrequited love. Because
then I wouldn't have to risk my heart again. Bella had nearly destroyed me in
high school when she had broken up with me. I'd held onto all the pain of that
breakup and tricked myself into believing that there was something more than
there actually was. I now knew that I was in love with the idea of Bella more
than I was in love with the actual person.

How could I possibly love her? The woman I was supposed to be with was right
in front of me. Our only problem was that we were born a generation apart.
Oh…and there was the whole, I'm married, she's dating a dickhead problem.
And then we had the issue that while I might be falling in love with Nessie, she
might still see me as an uncle. That probably was why she was so
uncomfortable with the idea that I had kissed her the night before.

The solution was that I needed to make Ness see me as a potential boyfriend
instead of an unofficial family member. Well, that was just one of many
problems I needed to work on. But that was the number one goal right now. I
needed to test the attraction we had to see if she continued to be receptive to
me. And then I was going to court her. I was going to make her see that given
the option of dating the dickhead and dating me, I was the one she should be
with. I glanced over at her and saw that she still had her eyes closed. My heart
ached a little. There were many things I had fucked up in my life…my
relationship with Ness being one of them. I couldn't mess up with her again.

"I think this is a good spot to try," Charlie said, interrupting my thoughts. He
dropped the anchor and picked up a fishing pole. "Here you go, Peanut."

"Thanks Grandpa," Ness replied, meeting my eyes as she took the pole. She
immediately blushed and looked away to bait her hook. We spent the next few
hours fishing. I caught one fish that was so pathetic I threw it back. Ness
caught two worth keeping. Charlie caught three before he was satisfied and
decided to call it a day.

"Hey Charlie, why don't we switch spots and you let me row us back in?" I
offered. "It'd be a good workout and I'm supposed to exercise my upper body
as much as possible. Right Ness?"

"Yes?" She said it like a question, as though she were wondering what my
motives were.

"Sounds good then," Charlie agreed. He slid over to my seat.

After some careful balancing on my part, I maneuvered myself into the middle
seat so that I was facing Ness. There wasn't a ton of room. I made sure to
position my legs so that they were between hers, our skin touching. What I
wouldn't give to be able to feel that.
"It's getting hot, huh?" I said, lifting up the now dry hem of my t-shirt to wipe
my forehead.

It was a tactical move on my part. If there was one thing I was confident about
when it came to my body it was that I still had my 6-pack. I had taken up
working out after I married Leah to relieve stress. Since the accident, I'd had to
focus even more on my upper body, which helped strengthen my muscles. As I
pulled my shirt away from my face, I saw Ness quickly look away from my abs.
Smiling smugly, I grabbed the oars and rowed us to shore.

Operation Erection had been a success of sorts. Now it was time to focus on a
new game plan.

Operation Win Renesmee had been launched. And this was one mission I
couldn't fail.

Chapter 8 – Swimming Lesson

Jacob's POV

I headed towards the kitchen for breakfast, humming off-key as I went. I

couldn't help myself. I was so damned happy. I'd stayed up most of the night
trying to figure out a way to win Renesmee over, and I finally came up with a
strategy that was guaranteed to work.

#1 Flirt…flirt as much as possible.

#2 Make her see me as a man and not some creepy, surrogate uncle.

#3 Prove to her that I was a much better match for her than her dip-shit
boyfriend.

#4 Remind her that I might have seventeen years on her, but that was
seventeen years of experience that could work in her favor.

Which brought me to my fifth and favorite point in the game plan:

#5 Seduce her (and hope that Edward didn't learn about it until we were
married with three kids).

I spent a lot of time going over that last point while trying to fall asleep the
night before. Dozens of scenarios went through my head of exactly how I could
make love to Ness. I might not be able to move my lower half, but I'd be
damned if I left her unsatisfied. I had thought in detail of several different
positions we could try. Unfortunately, I had to stop after awhile because it only
left me hard and aching.
I rolled myself into the kitchen area and grabbed a piece of fruit that Jenny was
cutting up. Popping it into my mouth, I chewed on the delicious texture while
continuing to hum. Jenny eyed me suspiciously.

"What?" I asked, after swallowing.

"You're awfully chippy today," Jenny remarked with narrowed eyes. "You eat a
small child or something?"

"Ha-ha," I replied dryly. "Can't a guy be in a good mood?"

"Other guys yes…you, no."

I rolled my eyes, before giving her a pointed look. "So…what'd you do this
weekend?"

"Went to Seattle and barhopped with some friends," she murmured while
continuing to cut up food.

"Meet any guys there?" I asked, wiggling my eyebrows.

"I'm not telling you about my sex life, Boss." She emphasized the last word
which made me chuckle. Jenny had no problems interfering with my private
life…funny how it worked when the shoe was on the other foot. She continued,
"Sorry, you're going to have to live vicariously through someone else."

"You're no fun anymore, Jen," I told her before grabbing another piece of fruit
and putting it into my mouth. I cocked my head slightly towards the hallway,
listening for any signs of Ness. When I didn't hear anything, I asked, "Have you
seen Renesmee this morning?"

"Oh…so that's it," Jenny said, putting down the knife she was using and going
over to the sink to wash her hands.

"What?" I asked innocently.

Jenny gave me a knowing look, before grabbing some juice out of the
refrigerator and pouring herself a glass.

"You've got your eyes set on our Nessie, have you?"

"I don't know what you mean," I stated, not making eye contact.

"Jacob…" Jenny paused, her tone suddenly serious. "You will be careful with
her, right?"

"You think I'd hurt Ness?" I asked in an injured tone.

"Not intentionally, no," Jenny replied. "But Ness isn't Leah. She has a heart."
I chuckled a little at that. "I know that. I just…I like her, Jen. I really, really like
her."

Jenny looked at me carefully before saying, "Okay. Just remember, you mess
with Renesmee, you mess with the friendships you have with her parents."

"I'm aware of that," I responded through suddenly clenched teeth. I didn't want
to be reminded of all that was on the line if this went to shit. And I certainly
didn't want to think about Bella when thoughts of seducing her daughter were
on the forefront of my mind.

"And…" Jenny continued, "Then there's the fact that she has a really cute
boyfriend."

"I get it, all right?" I grated out. "I'm aware of what the obstacles are."

Jenny nodded in satisfaction.

"You know," she said suddenly. "It's a beautiful morning. Why don't you and
Ness have breakfast on the patio?"

I looked out and saw the morning sun bathing the ocean, making it sparkle as
though a thousand diamonds were just underneath the surface.

"Are you helping me win Ness?" I asked curiously.

"As long as you don't fuck it up, sure," Jenny returned, with a slight smirk on
her face.

"Have I ever told you that I love you?" I gave her my most endearing smile.

"Yeah, yeah, save it for the one who should really hear it. Now go outside and
get yourself situated."

I grabbed the plate of fruit off the island and placed it on my lap, before
carefully rolling myself out the door that led to the patio. It was really a large
balcony that took you to the very edge of the cliff. I set the plate on the white
stone bistro table and rolled over to the black railing that was the only guard in
protecting people from falling over. I glanced down at the water crashing onto
the rocks below. I could hear Jenny bringing more stuff outside, but I was too
lost in thought to offer to help.

Now that Jenny had brought up Bella, I couldn't stop thinking about her. It was
amazing how much she had consumed my life up until Ness moved in with me.
I'd been completely obsessed with her. Now, I barely thought of her. So what
did that say about me? Was I an indecisive flake? Or had my mind deliberately
blocked me from seeing what was right in front of me all these years until Ness
and I were both ready for a relationship?
"What's all this?" I heard Ness say behind me.

I quickly turned and felt my breath hitch in my throat as I stared at her.

Renesmee was dressed for our physical therapy session in a loose fitting blue t-
shirt that barely showed off the curves hidden beneath. She was also wearing
white shorts that hung just above her thighs. They seemed to accentuate the
endless length of her shapely legs. Her hair was pulled back into a no nonsense
bun. She wasn't dressed any differently than she ever was for our sessions, but
now that I was more aware of my feelings for her, I felt like I was staring at a
precious jewel. I wanted to pull her down on my lap and loosen her hair until I
could run my fingers through it.

"What?" Nessie asked, shifting uncomfortably underneath my stare. I tried to

remember my strategy that I'd worked on for half the night, but it seemed to
have just taken a nose drive off the cliff. Wait…focus!

"You look beautiful," I said honestly. Her creamy cheeks filled with faint color.

"Uh…thanks," she replied, sitting down at the table and grabbing some of the
fruit laid out. I rolled myself over to her and deliberately brushed my leg over
against her. At least I thought I did since I couldn't feel it, but I must have
succeeded because Renesmee almost jumped out of her seat.

"Oh sorry," I said as innocently as I could. "Did I hurt you?"

"No, you're fine," she answered, not taking her eyes off the food in front of her.
I grinned to myself and helped myself to a bagel. Several times while we ate, I
made sure to brush my fingers over Ness's whenever she would pass me some
food or the jug of juice.

"So what's on the agenda today?" I asked.

"Stretching this morning, swimming this afternoon."

"You in a bathing suit…I can't wait," I told her, rubbing my hands together in
anticipation. "I bet you'll look sexy."

Ness gave me a mischievous look before saying, "Sure, if you're into women
wearing bloomers, I guess it's sexy."

"Bloomers?" I choked on the strawberry I was eating.

"What can I say? I like the retro look," she replied, before carefully covering her
smile with a napkin.

"I didn't realize the Edwardian era was considered retro," I responded. "Well,
I'm sure your father would approve of you wearing bloomers."
"Whose idea do you think it was?" Ness smiled sweetly. My eyes drifted to her
lips and I watched as her mouth parted slightly under my gaze.

"I…um…I should get things set up for this morning's exercises," Renesmee
murmured. She quickly got up from the table and hurried away before I could
stop her.

So…that kind of went smooth. I got the flirting in at least. And she certainly
hadn't looked at me like I was some pervy uncle just a few seconds ago.

"How'd it go?" Jenny asked as she came out to clear off the table.

I shrugged slightly. "It's a work in progress."

Jenny grabbed the dirty dishes with a disappointed look on her face. She went
back into the house muttering something about people being blind. I made my
way to the exercise room. I couldn't help but feel somewhat satisfied with this
morning's outcome. Ness might not want to admit it, but she felt an attraction
to me too.

"Where do you want me?" I asked, rolling myself over to her after I entered the
room.

"Mats for warm-up," she instructed.

Sighing, I lowered myself onto the floor. All of this seemed so pointless and
routine. I did the same thing over and over again. The doctor already told me I
wouldn't recover the ability to use my legs so what was the point of all this?

"What's the sigh for?" Renesmee asked.

"Just wondering how much longer we're going to keep this up?" I told her.

"Until you walk again," she stated, grabbing my thigh and stretching it.
Normally having a woman that close to my nether region would have caused
me to react, especially as it was Ness. However, I was filled with too much
frustration over my lack of progress to do anything but clench my hands into
fists.

"And what's this about?" she asked, letting go of my leg and picking up my one
hands. I immediately uncurled my fist and captured her fingers in mine.

"I was just thinking that normally the feel of a beautiful woman touching my
thigh would have caused my body to become aroused. Why can't I react,
Ness?"

I tried to say it casually, but she must have picked up on my panic.

"Jacob, if you don't walk again, you'll find a way to adjust," she said softly,
running her fingers that I wasn't holding across the back of my hand. "There
are ways for you to be intimate still."

"What kind of ways?" I asked, my voice suddenly seductive.

Ness quickly let go of my hand and moved away from me. "Ways that you and
Leah can figure out together."

I snorted, ending the sexual tension that had been surrounding us. "Yeah,
that's not going to happen."

Nessie turned away from me and began to fiddle with the exercise bike. "You
never know."

I sat up and frowned at her. "Ness, you know that's not going to happen, right?
Leah and I are through. I don't even want to consider letting her back in my
life."

Renesmee shrugged indifferently. "It's none of my business. Time for the bike."

She patted the seat of the machine. I wanted to argue with her more and prove
to her that I meant what I said. From the set tone of her face, I knew now
wasn't the time. I pulled myself over to the machine and got settled. Ness
strapped my feet onto the pedals and turned the bike on so that my feet
automatically began to spin. We spent another hour doing exercises before she
called it quits.

I decided that we would pursue our conversation over lunch. Sadly, I never got
a chance. Just as we sat down at the table, Seth walked in.

"Afternoon, everyone," Seth called out, his eyes lingering on Jenny who
stiffened and turned away to make sandwiches on the kitchen counter.
Disappointment flashed across his face.

"Hey Seth," Renesmee called out. "You want to join us for lunch?"

Did she have to seem so excited to see him?

"Uh…would it be a problem?" he asked, looking over at Jenny as he sat at the

table.

"No," she replied waspishly, carrying over a sandwich and setting it down in
front of Seth with a loud thud before heading back into the kitchen.

"So, uh, how's it going, Seth?" Ness asked, looking from Jenny back to him.

"Fine," he answered, giving Renesmee a strained smile. "I just had some
business I wanted to discuss with Jake."
"Well, don't let me stop you," she said, getting up and quickly leaving the table.
She put the plate she was using in the dishwasher then turned to me. "Jake,
don't forget we have swimming in an hour."

"Sure," I responded, trying to catch her eye. Ness nodded and went down the
hallway towards her room.

"Hey, Earth to Jake." Seth's hand started waving in front of my face.

I pulled my attention away from where Ness had disappeared to. "Sorry. What
did you need?"

"Jake, mind if I head out?" Jenny asked before Seth could start talking. "I've got
some shopping to do for dinner."

"Yeah, we're all set," I told her. "Thanks Jen for lunch."

"No problem," she returned. Seth stood up as Jenny walked by him. He looked
like he was going to go after her, but he just frowned and sat back down in his
chair.

"What's with you two?" I questioned.

"What do you mean?" Seth asked with a deceptively innocent expression on his
face.

"You and Jenny. You're so weird around each other all the time."

"Kind of like you and Ness?" Seth said with a pointed look.

"Touché," I smiled. "Does that mean you want Jenny?"

Seth looked surprised. "Are you admitting something?"

"I…" I wiped my hand wearily across my face before saying, "Yeah, I like Ness.
Way more than I should."

"About bloody time you admitted it." Seth leaned over and lightly punched me
on the arm.

"Yeah well…as Nessie kindly reminded me before lunch, I'm still married. To
your sister I might add."

"Yeah, but that shit's been over between you and Leah for awhile," Seth
responded, leaning back in his chair and putting his hands behind his head.

"I can't believe your advocating me getting involved with another woman."

"Jacob, you know I love you. I also love my sister, even if she can be a raging
bitch. But if there was something I learned from my own failed marriage is that
life is too short to be miserable. You and Leah aren't happy together, and
you've been through hell since your son died. If anyone deserves to be happy,
it's you."

I felt a little choked up at Seth's unwavering support of me. "I appreciate that,
man."

"Well, I mean it," Seth said, before shifting uncomfortably. "So are we done
talking emotions and shit?"

"Yeah," I laughed. "What did you need to tell me about work?"

We spent the next hour going over business. Seth finally got up and left. I knew
from the way he kept peeping towards the front window that he'd been hoping
to see Jenny again before he left. Going into my room, I changed into my swim
trunks. Deciding to go shirtless, I pulled my wheelchair down the hall until I
made it into the poolroom. Ness was already there, doing laps.

"Hey," I called out. She jerked her head up and pushed her hair out of her face.

"Hey," Ness returned. She made her way over to the ladder and climbed out.
She was wearing a black one piece bathing suit which thankfully didn't include
bloomers. Her suit wasn't meant to be sexy, but she somehow managed it
without trying.

"You ready for this?" she asked as she walked over to me, her eyes running
briefly over my abs causing her face to turn slightly red.

She reached up to pull her hair back with her hands. When she did that, Ness's
back arched slightly, causing her breasts to stick out prominently. I could see
the effect the cool air of the room was having on her. Seeing her like this was
also having an effect on me. Feeling Mr. Happy rise to the occasion, I quickly
got out of my seat and went over to the edge of the pool.

"Yep, I'm ready," I declared before rolling myself into the water.

"Jacob, wait!"

But I had already hit the surface. I sunk like I had a metal chain attached to my
feet. I tried to kick up, but I couldn't move. Panicking, I began to thrash around,
which only made me sink faster. I suddenly felt arms around my chest and
feminine curves pressed against my back. We broke the surface a few seconds
later, me gasping for air gratefully.

"You stupid idiot!" Nessie breathed out angrily as she towed me to the
shallower end of the pool. "What the hell were you thinking?"

Err…that I had a raging erection and I didn't want you to see it.
"If we're going to do this, you're going to do exactly what I say," Ness ordered
as she sat me on the steps leading out of the water. "Is that understood?"

I could only nod, still shaken by my near drowning.

"Your legs are going to act like an anchor. You can't swim like you used to.
When you're in the water, you've got to keep yourself horizontal, otherwise
you'll sink."

"Okay," I said.

She eyed me through narrowed eyes before adding, "All right. Let's start with a
few exercises."

Ness went over to the side of the pool, grabbed a life jacket, and handed it to
me. "Here, put this on."

"Really?" I muttered in disgust.

"Until you figure out how to swim, yes."

"Fine," I grumbled, putting the jacket on. There was something so emasculating
about wearing a life vest at my age. I sat back on the step and gave her my
best smile. "How do I look? Sexy?"

"Oh yeah…hold me back. Oh baby," Ness said so dryly I rolled my eyes at her.

"All right, Loch Ness, show me what you've got," I teased and earned a light
punch on my arm. Renesmee never liked the nickname I'd given her when she
was little. The girl swam like a fish when she was a kid and the name stuck.

"Jerk, I should let you drown," she said through narrowed eyes, even as she
bent down to grab my arms. I was given a peep down her low cut neckline.

"Keep showing me that view and I'd happily die," I teased. Her eyes widened
and she immediately covered her chest with one hand, blocking my view.

I sighed dramatically. "Pity."

"You're such a perv," Ness said, though she had a slight smile on her face. She
placed herself under one of my arms and we began to float towards the middle
of the pool.

"Yeah, but you love me anyway," I half-heartedly joked, secretly hoping she'd
admit it.

"Whatever," she said casually, though her face flushed slightly. "All right,
enough of this foolishness. Time to get to work."
"Okay, boss-lady." I grinned at her. She smirked at me in return.

"First things first," she instructed. "Slowly lean back."

I did as I was told and my lower half soon began to float up, my legs drifting
slightly under the surface.

"Now, I want you to push yourself with your arms. Really feel the water," Ness
said, standing next to me as she eyed my position carefully.

I began to slowly move across the pool. Ness swam sideways next to me. When
I reached the edge, she stopped me before I could hit my head and grabbed an
arm, pulling me around until I was able to go across the pool in the opposite
direction. We did this for several laps. Each time I became a little more
confident. As I was halfway across the pool mid lap something dawned on me
that made me lose my balance and my feet sink. If I hadn't been wearing the
life jacket, I would have gone under.

"What is it?" Ness asked, instantly concerned.

I was embarrassed to admit, but I was a little choked up. I had to blink a couple
of times.

"This is the first time I've been able to move around without my wheelchair
since the accident," I whispered.

"Oh, Jake…" Ness murmured. Her eyes glistened for a moment as well.

"Thank you for this, Nessie," I told her in a barely audible voice.

"You're welcome," she replied, a gentle smile lingering on her lips. "You ready
to get out now?"

"No." I instantly shook my head. "Give me a few minutes more—please?"

"Sure." Renesmee swam over to the side of the pool and rested her elbows
against the edge, facing me so that she could still keep an eye on me in case I
needed her. I leaned back as I was taught and felt myself begin to float. I
stared up at the ceiling, all thoughts of my agenda to seduce Ness temporarily
forgotten.

I never realized how much I took my ability to walk for granted until it was
taken away from me. I knew as I swam there that I'd never take another thing
for granted again. Even the slight freedom this pool allowed me from my chair
was something I knew I'd cherish for as long as I lived. I looked over at
Renesmee. She was staring out one of the giant windows that lined the wall
overlooking the ocean. She had a contended smile on her face.
I had this freedom because of her. Ness had given me so much since she
moved in. She gave me her patience, her never ending hope, and she had
given me her care. She was my angel. That thought made me pause.

I remembered when I was in the hospital. I thought an angel had been sitting
with me. I remembered waking up and being furious when she wasn't there.
For some time, I had thought that maybe it had been Bella who'd been with
me, but she had been in Florida with Edward and Oliver.

"Ness?" I asked.

"Hmm?"

"When you came to see me in the hospital when I was first injured, did I ever
say anything to you?"

Her cheeks flushed. "What do you mean?"

"I just thought…I don't know. Never mind," I said, turning to look back at the
ceiling.

"What is it, Jake?" Ness questioned, swimming over to my side.

"It's just that when I was in the hospital, I had been convinced that I had an
angel sitting with me. I remember even calling out for my angel. I just
wondered if that was you."

Renesmee looked away. I thought for a moment her face looked pained. "No,
you didn't call me an angel while I was visiting you."

"Oh…" I said, feeling disappointed. I could have sworn it had been Ness.

"Come on, time to get you out of the water," Ness ordered, reaching for my
hand so that she could drag me back to the pool steps.

Once we got there, Ness climbed out of the pool and moved my wheelchair
over to where I was sitting so that I could climb into it easily. I took off the life
jacket and handed it to her. She put it back where it originally was before
turning to me.

"Ready?" she asked.

"Wait," I responded. "Can we just sit here for a second? It's not like the pool
isn't heated or anything."

"All right," Nessie said hesitantly before sitting next to me. "For just a few more
minutes. I don't want to cause too much stress to your body. You used muscles
today that you probably don't realize you have and-"
"Relax," I said, leaning over and pinching her lips together with my thumb and
index finger. "Let me just enjoy the moment for a little bit longer, all right?"

She nodded and I let go of her mouth, but I didn't move away.

"Ness," I said, running the tip of my thumb along the bottom edge of her lip.
"This afternoon has meant more to me than you could know."

"I'm glad," she murmured.

I continued to run my thumb along her lip, moving it to the center and pressing
down a little. Her mouth parted slightly.

"Nessie," I whispered. "I wish I could remember everything that happened the
night I got drunk. I wish I could remember what it was like to feel your lips
against mine. I wish it didn't seem so much like a dream to me."

"Jacob, I-"

"Shh…" I responded. My hand went around her neck so that I could bring her to
me. Closing the remaining distance, my lips lightly brushed against her. Jolts of
fiery heat raced over my skin.

"Jake," Ness mumbled against my mouth in slight protest, before her arms
went around my neck of their own accord and she pressed herself against my
chest. Kissing Renesmee was like being given Christmas presents from your
entire lifespan all at once. It was incredible.

I wrapped my arm around her waist and pulled her more fully against me,
moving so that my back was against the pool step. Ness straddled my waist,
her mouth not breaking from mine. My tongue darted out and entered her
mouth, tasting and exploring the sweet area. I couldn't help but moan as her
tongue caressed mine. I felt myself instantly harden. I knew Renesmee felt it
too, because she moved her lower half right against my aroused flesh.

Ness broke away from my mouth as she threw her head back, her lower half
beginning to build friction against my erection. I reached up and nibbled on her
throat. Nessie, in return, grabbed my head and held me to her as I continued to
nip and lick the skin being offered to me.

"Oh God, what am I doing?" she asked, almost to herself.

"You're giving into what we both want," I told her gruffly, my one hand drifting
down her back to mold her curvy bottom. She froze at my words even as I
began to kiss her jaw line.

"Jake, stop, we can't do this," Ness pleaded. I moved my mouth and began to
nuzzle her neck.
"I thought you said it wasn't inappropriate," I recanted her words from this
weekend. Ness's features blushed delicately.

"I was trying to let you off the hook, jackass," she replied, even as she angled
her head, giving me better access to her neck.

"Ah…is that what you were doing?" I murmured, brushing my lips against her
rapidly beating pulse line.

I hitched her up higher so that her breasts were almost eye level with me.
Leaning forward, I kissed the indention in the middle of her collarbone, before
making my way to her left breast. She was just on the small side of being
medium, but her size was perfect to me. I reached out with a shaking hand and
cupped her through her bathing suit. Her nipple protruded tantalizingly through
the material of her suit. I rolled the tip gently with my finger and thumb.
Renesmee closed her eyes in response.

I soon replaced my hand with my mouth and lavished her rigid point with my
tongue. Ness clasped me to her, making a seductive humming noise at the
back of her throat. The sound turned me on more than anything. I broke away
and reached up to pull her bathing suit straps down her arms. Renesmee's
eyes snapped open.

"Ness?" I asked at the sudden confusion that appeared on her face.

She seemed dazed for a minute before she shook her head. "No…I can't do
this."

She pushed off my lap and swam back until she was several feet away.

"Jacob…why are you so interested in me? Why now? Why after all these
years?" Ness questioned.

"What?" I felt like I was drowning again.

"They're simple enough questions. Why are you pursuing me?"

"I'm attracted to you," I told her honestly. I didn't think she'd be ready to hear
that I was falling in love with her just yet.

"So it's not just because I'm available and can turn you on?" Ness asked, her
face taut.

"No, of course not," I replied instantly. "Renesmee, I know this is weird, given
who we are to each other, but I'm interested in you. You're sweet, kind,
generous…y-you're amazing."
"I'm amazing," she repeated with a bitterness that she didn't even try to hide.
"I'm so amazing that you decided that you were only interested in me after I
moved in with you and became a possibly convenient lay."

"No, that's not it at all," I tried to move towards her, but she swam back until
she was in the middle of the pool. Her face was pale and I could see the tears
in her eyes. "Nessie, please."

She shook her head. "Nahuel asked me to marry him."

"What?" I asked, feeling as though I had just been kicked in the stomach.
"What did you say?"

"I told him that I wanted to wait until I was done with school."

"So you didn't say yes," I said, praying silently that she'd give me some hope.

"It's the inevitable conclusion," Ness said. "Once I'm established in my career,
I'm going to marry Nahuel."

"Ness, please," I reached out my hand, hoping that she'd take it. She didn't.

"Jacob, when all this is over and my time with you is through, you're going to
be walking. And when you walk, you're going to walk away from me…just like
you always do."

"That's not true," I stated, feeling as though I were pleading for my life right
now.

"Of course it's true," Renesmee countered. "It's what you've always done. But
this time, I'm not going to put myself in the position of being hurt again."

She went over to the side of the pool and pulled herself out. She grabbed a
towel she set out and wrapped it around her tightly.

"This won't happen again," Renesmee said coldly. "If it does, I'm out of here."

She headed for the door and left the room without a second glance.

Chapter 9 – Starting Over

Jacob's POV

To say that Operation Win Renesmee was a disaster was an understatement.

My plans to win her over crashed and burned, the pitiful ashes scattering in the
wind.

In the week since our encounter in the pool, Nessie had put up a wall against
me that was so strong, even the most skilled invader wouldn't have been able
to conquer it. I realized about ten minutes after she left me in the pool how
stupid I'd been in my entire approach to winning her heart.

All this time I had been thinking about myself…of my wants and needs. I never
even considered what Ness could want. It shamed me to admit, but I'd been
acting like a child. Honestly, I'd been acting like one ever since the accident. I
was so afraid and angry at the thought of never walking again, I behaved like a
brat throwing a tantrum.

Ness had been my anchor the entire time. And how did I treat her in return?
Like an easy lay. I wouldn't be surprised if Ness packed up one day and never
came back.

I had to remedy the current situation fast, because there was no doubt in my
mind that I needed Renesmee. I needed her in my life. It wasn't because she
was convenient either. The accident woke me up to right what was in front of
me.

I couldn't picture my life without Renesmee anymore. Truth was, it had always
been this way. Even after I first got married, I had felt like there was an
emptiness inside me because Nessie wouldn't have anything to do with me. Of
course, I hadn't realized at the time what was missing in my life. I had felt her
absence more on a subconscious level.

Yet at the very lowest points in my life, Renesmee was always there for me,
even when she hated me. I remembered right after my son was born stillborn,
Leah had decided to "mourn" by going out with her friends to some trendy
club. I never blamed her for that. I understood that each person handled death
differently, and if Leah needed to go out and get drunk, then so be it.

For me, I thought I needed Bella. I'd gone to her and Edward's house late one
night and Edward had offered me their spare room. While I'd be lying in bed
staring up at the ceiling, I had heard Bella's newborn son, Oliver, crying in the
room down the hall. I hadn't been able to take the sound and made my way to
Edward's study. I'd sat on the leather couch in the room, put my face in my
hands, and cried my heart out.

It was while I was sitting there that I'd felt the thin arms of my fourteen-year-
old god-daughter wrap around my waist. I hadn't hesitated. I'd pulled her onto
my lap and buried my face into her neck, sobbing out my heartbreak. Nessie
held onto me tightly until dawn, murmuring over and over that everything was
going to be okay and that she loved me. When I finally pulled myself together, I
had thanked her sheepishly. She patted my face with her tiny hand and we
went our separate ways. The next time I saw her, I didn't mention that night,
and she went back to ignoring me.
It was strange now that I thought about it. Even then, I needed her. I had been
blinded by my love for Bella for so long, but the person I always turned to
during the darkest times in my life was Renesmee. Though I was the older one,
Ness was stronger. She always had been. She was my rock. And now that I
knew my feelings were changing for her and I was actually falling in love with
her, it didn't seem strange or awkward. It just seemed so natural and right. But
now I needed to find a way to prove to her that she meant more to me than a
piece of ass. Ness was my whole world. I needed to convince her of that.

The first step I needed to take was to call Edward's brother-in-law, Jasper. After
a Friday morning workout session with Renesmee which had been conducted in
complete silence, I made my way into my home office. Shutting the door
behind me, I rolled myself over to my desk, picked up the phone, and dialed
the number I'd been given.

"Law offices of Whitlock, Uley, and Young, this is Gianna speaking. May I help
you?" A woman's voice said.

"Yes, this is Jacob Black. I'd like to speak to Jasper, please." Jasper was a
lawyer, one of the best in the business. He knew just which emotions to press
to get his way when negotiating.

"Is he expecting your call?"

"I have a feeling he's been expecting my call for months," I muttered.

"I'm sorry?"

"Uh yeah, I'm a client of his," I stated.

"Oh," Gianna replied. "Just one moment please."

A song by The Carpenters began to blare in my ear as I was put on hold.

Against my will, I began to nod my head in time with the music. Sadly, I grew
up listening to this crap. My mom had been obsessed with the likes of John
Denver, Perry Como, and her all time favorite, The Carpenters. I started
humming along to the melody I was currently listening to. As soon as it hit the
chorus, I couldn't stop myself from belting out the words.

"Baby baby baby baby, oh baby. I love you."

I was really getting into it when the music went dead.

"Uh, thanks Jake, I love you too," Jasper's amused voice came on.

"Oh sorry," I replied. I felt my neck heat up in embarrassment.

"No problem," Jasper chuckled. "How've you been?"

"I can't complain," I returned.

"And how's my niece doing?"

My stomach twisted as I thought of Renesmee's blank expression this morning

while we were doing our exercises.

"She's fine," I told him, even as my grip on the phone tightened. "She's helping
me a lot."

"Glad to hear it," Jasper responded. "Ness has always been the type who'd give
the shirt off her back if someone needed it."

My mind instantly started conjuring up images of Ness shirtless. No. Focus!

"Listen Jasper, I was wondering how things were going with the divorce."

"Things are on track. It usually takes ninety days for a marriage to be dissolved
in the state of Washington. I'm negotiating with Leah's lawyer on some things
still. You already agreed to give her the penthouse in Seattle and the home on
Martha's Vineyard, plus an eight million dollar settlement. Her lawyer is
demanding more money though."

I ran my hand tiredly over my face. "Just give it to her."

Jasper snorted. "Absolutely not."

"Jasper, I just want to be through with this."

"I know you do, but it's my job to protect my clients' interest. Trust me, Leah's
not going to get any more than she deserves."

"How much longer till I'm free?"

"About thirty days."

"Fine," I sighed. "If you can push things ahead, I'd appreciate it."

"Sure thing," he replied. "I'll keep you updated."

"Thanks, Jasper. Give Alice my best."

"I will."

I hung up the phone and rolled myself into the kitchen. I was surprised to see
Seth there. He was talking to Jenny, his expression strained. Neither of them
noticed me.

"Jen, please. I'm sorry." He tried to put his hand on her shoulder but she
shrugged him off.
"It doesn't matter anymore," Jenny said as she moved away from him. "It was a
long time ago. Forget about it."

"I don't want to forget about it," Seth murmured, trying to reach for her again.

She stepped away from him once more. "You made your choice."

I tried to back away so that I could retreat to my room. This was obviously a
very private conversation. As I tried to turn my chair though, I miscalculated
how much room I had. I hit the wall with a resounding thud, which caused them
both to snap their heads in my direction. Jenny looked relieved to see me. Seth
looked frustrated.

"Jake, are you ready for lunch?" Jenny asked, walking over to the kitchen table
and setting a plate on it.

"That'd be great, thanks," I replied before offering, "I can come back though."

"Don't be silly," Jenny waved off my concern. "Come and eat."

I rolled myself over to the table shooting Seth an apologetic look. He nodded
before glancing over at Jen.

Sighing, he said, "I should get going."

He turned and walked out the door, closing the door quietly behind him. I
looked at Jenny and raised an eyebrow at her.

"What?" she said innocently.

"You two need to just get a room and get it over with."

Her cheeks flushed but she didn't say anything. She carried a bowl of pasta
salad along with some rolls over to where I was sitting and placed them in front
of me.

"Listen, I was thinking of visiting my sister in Portland this weekend. Do you

need me for any reason?"

"No, you can head out if you want," I assured her.

"Thanks, Jake," she replied. "I'm going to go pack right now."

I nodded and she left the room. I scooped some pasta on my plate, eating it
slowly as I thought of this weekend. Ness and I would have the house to
ourselves. Maybe we could finally talk and get some things out in the open. Just
as I took another bite, Ness walked into the room. She had changed her clothes
from the workout outfit she'd had on earlier. She was now wearing a pink
stripped halter top that somehow complimented her bronze colored hair and a
hot pink skirt that had layered ruffles on it and went about mid-thigh. Her hair
fell into waves and curls around her shoulder. Her skin had a pinkish tinge to it
indicating that she had recently stepped out of the shower. She looked and
smelled amazing.

"You look nice," I remarked casually.

"Thank you," Ness said, grabbing a plate and sitting down next to me. I
watched as she began eating. I could feel the tension rising inside of me. She
was shutting me out again. Finally, I had enough.

"Ness, aren't we even going to talk about what happened in the pool?" I asked
softly.

"No." Renesmee immediately stiffened. "Look, I think we've done enough

exercise for the day. I'm going to cancel our afternoon session."

I eyed her more carefully. I had a sneaking suspicion as to why she was
dressed up.

"You have big plans tonight?" I wondered.

"I'm leaving for Seattle," Ness said as she pushed her food around on her plate.
"I'm spending the weekend with Nahuel."

"Oh," I replied, feeling crushed. I wanted to beg her not to go; to give us a
chance. Instead, I smiled painfully at her and said, "Have a safe drive."

She looked somewhat surprised, but she nodded, "Thanks."

"Well," I murmured, looking down at the exercise shorts I was still wearing from
earlier. "If we're done for the day, I'm going to take a shower."

Giving her another sick smile, I grabbed my plate and put it in the dishwasher
before heading to my room. Grabbing some fresh shorts, I went into my
bathroom. Stripping off the clothes I was wearing, I positioned myself on the
bench that was inside my shower stall. Turning on the water, I let it run over
me, closing my eyes as I tried to relax.

How the fuck could I prove to Renesmee that I was serious about wanting to be
in her life when she was always running off to lover boy? I looked down at my
legs…my pathetic, useless legs. Anger began to overwhelm me as I stared at
them lying there motionless.

Balling my hand into a fist, I punched one as hard as I could. It felt like I was
hitting someone else. I watched with detached interest as the skin turned red
before becoming puffy. I knew I'd have a bruise there, not that I would even
feel it. Sighing, I began to wash up. Once I was through, I got out of the shower
and dried off, pulling on my clean shorts before making my way back towards
the center of the house.

"Hello?" I shouted out. No one responded. I rolled myself to the window

overlooking my driveway and glanced out. Jenny and Renesmee's cars were
gone. Feeling my shoulders sag, I made my way back to the middle of the
room.

Now what?

I thought about calling Seth over, but I had a feeling he was still ticked at me
for interrupting his conversation with Jenny. I could always hang out with
Rachel and Paul, but I really didn't feel like having Rachel hover over me all
day. I looked down at my legs. There was a large purple bruise forming where
I'd hit the one earlier.

As I stared at them, it dawned on me that I knew exactly how to prove my

feelings for Renesmee. She thought I had taken a defeatist attitude about my
ability to walk again. A part of me had. The doctor told me I wouldn't walk
again and I just accepted that. But Nessie believed in me. I was going to work
my ass off proving that her faith was justified.

I rolled myself into my exercise room. Going over to the mats, I laid down and
began to do the stretches Renesmee had taught me. Once I was sufficiently
warmed up, I went over to the exercise bike. I strapped my feet onto the pedals
and turned the machine on. I leaned back in my seat and closed eyes as I let
the bike move my legs. I needed to keep them circulating.

I sat like that for the next couple of hours. I knew my body would pay for
overstressing my muscles, but it was for a good cause. I was debating whether
to go for another hour when I heard someone call out my name.

"In here," I yelled out, before turning slightly to face the door. My mouth
dropped open a little when I saw it was Bella.

"Hey Jake-" Her eyebrows snapped together as she looked at the sheen of
sweat on my face to the machine, before she looked around. "Where's
Renesmee?"

"She went to see lover boy this weekend," I grunted, turning my attention back
to my bike and shutting it off.

"Should you be exercising without her?"

"I'm a grown man, Bella," I snapped. "I don't need to be coddled."

"I know that, Jake, but…how long have you been at it?"
I shrugged. "I don't know. A couple of hours, I guess."

"Won't that hurt you?"

"What are you doing here, Bella?" I gritted as I bent down to unhook my feet. I
grabbed my one leg and swung it over the middle of the bike so that it was
next to my other one. I went to reach for my wheelchair when my back started
to clench up into spasms. Letting out a cry of pain, I hit the floor.

"Jake!" Bella screeched.

"My back," I yelped.

"What should I do?" she questioned worriedly.

"Massage the area just left of my right shoulder blade," I instructed.

Her cool fingers drifted lightly across my back. I couldn't help but compare
them to Ness's firm, knowing hands.

"To the left," I ordered and she did what I asked. "Now a little to the right."

Fuck! Ness would already be taking my pain away if she were here. Bella finally
found the sore spot. I felt like pounding my head against the floor when I barely
felt any pressure from her.

"Harder," I yelled as the pain became excruciating. She added only slightly
more pressure. "Jesus, fucking press harder, Bella. Dig your elbow into it if you
have to."

She leaned in close and used her elbow against me. I felt her breasts against
my back, but I had no reaction to her much to my relief. After awhile, she was
able to work out the knot in my back.

"Okay, that's good." I eventually muttered.

She laid down next to me breathing hard. "You stupid shit. Don't ever exercise
like this again unless Renesmee is here. What if I hadn't shown up? You could
have ended up on the floor in pain all weekend."

"I know," I grumbled. "Thank you, Bells."

"Why?" she asked, rolling on her side and raising herself up on her elbow. "Why
would you risk your safety like this?"

I rolled gingerly on my back and stared up at the ceiling. "I'm tired of being a
cripple."

"Oh Jake-"
"I'm not looking for sympathy," I said testily. "I've been wallowing in self-pity
long enough. I need to focus on getting better and stop doing everything half-
ass."

"Where'd you get all this new motivation from?" Bella wondered.

I glanced at her and debated telling her the truth. What could I say though?
Well, Bella, remember how we gave each other our virginity? Yeah, now I want
to be with your daughter.

I took the pervasive approach instead. "What are you doing here anyway?
Where's Edward?"

"We came into town so that he and Carlisle could take Oliver out this weekend
for a camping trip. They're doing some male bonding, so I thought I'd pop over
and spend some time with my daughter."

"I'm sorry you missed her," I replied, carefully sitting up and cautiously placing
myself into my wheelchair.

"I'm sorry too," Bella said, sitting up. "Now, stop trying to change the subject.
Why were you trying to kill yourself on the bike?"

I snorted. "You're such a drama queen. You've been like that since high school.
I wasn't trying to kill myself."

Bella's eyes narrowed. "Tell you what. You go take a shower…cause Jacob, you
kind of stink right now, and I'll make us some dinner. Then you and I are going
to have a nice long talk. We haven't had one in a long time."

I silently groaned but agreed. Going back into my bathroom, I took my second
shower of the day and then got dressed, pulling on a black t-shirt and Army
green shorts. When I went into the kitchen, Bella was cooking hamburgers on
my George Foreman grill. She grabbed a bag of potato chips out of the
cupboard and poured some in a bowl. She placed it on the table along with
some condiments and two beers. We soon started eating.

"So how are thing working out between you and Ness?" Bella asked after taking
a bite out of her sandwich and swallowing it. I nearly knocked over my can of
beer when she mentioned Ness's name. I grabbed it just before it tipped over.

"Jeez, jumpy much?" Bella joked.

"Sorry," I said stupidly. "What do you mean…how are things working out
between me and Ness?"

"What did you think I mean?" she asked coyly. "I meant how's it going working
with her?"
"Oh," I muttered, picking up a chip and popping it into my mouth. "It's going
good."

"What would she say if she knew how you over exercised yourself today?"

"She'd probably say the same thing you did…I was being a stupid shit."

"You never answered me before," Bella remarked casually. "Why are you
suddenly so motivated now? Why not before?"

I shook my head. Bella was so damn stubborn. She never let anything go. In
that regard, Ness was very much her mother's daughter.

"I just…I want more out of life than this," I finally said. "I want to know that I did
everything possible to walk again."

"Oh," Bella replied, looking dissatisfied with my answer.

"Isn't that a good enough reason?" I wondered.

"Yeah, it is," she nodded but still looked disappointed. "It's just that, Jasper said
you called him earlier…"

Before I could get react to that news, she swiftly added, "Don't worry, he only
mentioned that you called, not the reasons behind it. I assumed though it had
to do with your divorce and I just thought maybe…I don't know. I thought
maybe you had met someone else and that's why you were suddenly taking an
interest in your divorce."

I open and closed my mouth. I was on very tricky ground right now. I wanted to
confess everything, but there was no way in hell I could tell Bella that my
interest was in her daughter. But Bella had also been my sounding board and
best friend for as long as I could remember. If I was close to anyone and felt
that I could share confidences with any particular person, it was her.

"There is someone," I finally admitted. Bella shrieked and came over and
hugged me.

"Finish eating," she ordered once she let me go. "I want to get comfortable
while you dish out details."

As I shoved more food in my mouth, Bella started clearing off the table. She
went back into the kitchen and restored it to Jenny's pristine condition. As soon
as I was done, we went to the living room. I got settled on the couch while Bella
took a chair opposite of me.

Curling her feet underneath her, she said, "All right, spill."

"What do you want to know?"

"What's she like? Are you dating? Who asked who out? What does-"

"Whoa, one at a time," I interrupted with a laugh. "To answer your first
question, she's amazing. She's sweet, funny, caring, blunt, doesn't put up with
any of my shit, and she's beautiful. I mean, drop dead gorgeous."

"She sounds perfect," Bella said with a smile.

"She is," I nodded sappily. "She's perfect for me at least."

"How'd you meet?"

Fuck!

"Uh, she works at the hospital where I got treated."

"Oh, so she works in Seattle, not here?" Bella questioned.

"No, I mean…she works locally. Remember, I was treated by a doctor here," I

said evasively.

"Oh…" Bella replied with slight confusion before asking excitedly, "Did you ask
her out yet?"

"No." I frowned. "I want to be on my feet first."

"Jake, you should ask her out now. Before someone else does."

"I can't, Bells. It's complicated," I muttered.

Bella crossed her arms over her chest. "Then un-complicate it. You like her.
Does she like you?"

"I think so…I don't know," I responded with a sigh. "We haven't always had the
best, uh…working relationship."

Bella's eyes narrowed for a minute as she observed me. I felt like a bug being
inspected under a microscope.

"So tell me more about her," Bella demanded though her face was thoughtful.
"How old is she?"

I felt my face flame. "She's…um…she's younger than me; in her twenties, in

fact."

"My, my, she's practically Nessie's age," Bella stated almost smugly.

"Yeah," I said with a cough. "How about that?"

"Is the age difference a problem for her?" Bella asked.

"I don't think so," I murmured. God, I really hoped it wasn't.

"I bet it's not," Bella said, looking out the window as she watched the sun begin
to set. "I bet this girl has feelings for you, too. I bet it wouldn't matter to her in
the slightest if you were five, ten, or seventeen years older than her."

I froze as Bella mentioned the exact age difference between Ness and I. I
glanced at her, but she was still staring out the window.

"Well, Jake, I say go for it," she finally replied after a moment of silence. "Don't
be an idiot about it though. Girls that young will think you're only interested in
them to be a trophy wife. She's not the type looking for a sugar daddy, right?"

"No," I replied instantly. "She's definitely not the type. She's not interested in
that kind of stuff at all. She's above that. S-She's completely amazing."

Bella carefully inspected my face and smiled. "Wow, I never thought I'd live to
see the day."

"What are you talking about?" I asked in confusion.

"Jacob Black…finally in love."

I rolled my eyes at that. "Bells, I've been in love before."

She made a scoffing noise. "It certainly wasn't with Leah, and it definitely
wasn't with me."

I felt my eyebrows draw together. "You don't think I loved you?"

"Jacob, I think you were more interested in the idea of me than the real me. I
mean, we started dating right after your mom died. You needed that female
companionship. But in the long run, our love never really went deeper than
friendship and occasional sex. That's why I was so confident that Edward was
the one for me the second I saw him. All these years I've been hoping you'd
find a great love, too. And now you have."

I frowned as I glanced at the arm of my couch. Was what Bella said true? Had I
only held onto her so tightly all these years because I was looking for a female
substitute in my life after my mom died? Damn, Freud would have a field day
with that one.

"Now," Bella continued. "From what I've picked up so far, you haven't done
much in the act of pursuing this girl. What have you done?"

I went over the basics.

"So basically, you've tried to seduce her? That's been your big plan so far?"
Bella asked condescendingly.
"Yeah, well, I'm still working out the kinks to my game plan."

"How about this?" Bella retorted. "First off, drop your stupid plan. This girl
sounds like she sees right through all your antics, which means she probably
doesn't think you're serious about her. Stop playing games and follow your
heart."

I looked at her unsurely which caused Bella to giggle.

"Trust me, Jacob, this girl could be yours. Just be honest with her. She'll respect
you a lot more for that." Looking down at her watch, Bella said, "I should get
going. Esme and I are going on an all day shopping trip in Port Angeles
tomorrow. Alice is meeting us, so I'm going to need plenty of rest."

She came over and kissed me on the cheek.

"Give Ness my love," she requested as she pulled away. With a slight smile on
her face, she added, "And good luck with her."

"Her?" I asked, my heart pounding. Had Bella figured it out?

"The girl you're so interested in," Bella replied innocently. She headed towards
the front door, but turned around before she went through it. "Oh, and I'd stop
with the crazy exercise routine. Unless Renesmee is here to save you, that is."

With that, she closed the door behind her, leaving me to wonder if I had
stepped into some strange universe where people spoke in codes. I made my
way to my room for an early night's sleep. The next day my body was so sore, I
didn't move unless I needed the bathroom or food. I felt a lot better the
following day. I got dressed in a nice pair of jeans and a button down shirt. I
went into the kitchen and cooked an omelette for my dinner. Just as I was
about to eat, Renesmee walked in.

"Hey," I said, looking at her tired, strained expression. She looked like she'd
been crying. "Everything okay?"

"Yeah," she replied, making her way over to me. "I don't suppose you have
anymore food left?"

"Sure," I said, shoving my plate towards her before grabbing more food. I asked
casually, "How'd this weekend go?"

Ness's fork was partially raised to her mouth. She seemed to hesitate before
she placed it back down on her plate. "It was fine."

"I'm glad," I murmured. What I wouldn't give to be able to just pull her onto my
lap and hold her close.
Sitting back in my chair, I observed her closely.

Deciding that I couldn't put off any longer, I said, "Ness, I want to talk about
what happened in the pool."

She pushed her chair back and started to stand up. I leaned over and grabbed
her wrist, restraining her.

"Please," I begged.

Sighing, she sat back down. "Fine. What is it that you have to say?"

"I'm sorry," I stated simply.

She stared at me for a moment before looking back down at her food. "Okay."

"No, you misunderstand. I'm not sorry we kissed. I've been wanting to do that
since your twentieth birthday."

Her head popped up on that. I continued.

"I'm sorry that you felt I was treating you like a convenient lay. I never meant
to make you feel that way. The truth is, Renesmee, I'm more attracted to you
then I've been to anyone else in my entire life. It's not just a physical thing
either. There's so much I like and admire about you. I like the sound of your
voice and how much you care for people. I like your sense of humor and your
passion for life. The truth is, there are so many things I completely adore about
you. When I said you were amazing, I meant it. I know me saying this to you is
strange given that you've always seen me as your godfather. But I'd really like
to explore what's between us some more. Because you feel it too, don't you?"

"Yes," Nessie whispered, her eyes shining with tears as she met my eyes. I
reached over and grabbed her hand, flipping it over so that the back of it was
on the table. I ran my thumb across her palm.

"Renesmee, all I'm asking for is a chance," I pleaded. "I know you have Nahuel
and you said you were planning on m-marrying him someday. But if a part of
you wonders what this is between us, I'm begging you to give me a shot. That
way, years from now when you look back on your life, you won't have to say, I
wish I would have done it differently."

"Is that what you've done?" Ness questioned softly. "Do you have regrets?"

"Yeah, I have a ton," I admitted.

"Like what?" she asked, her head cocking adorably to the side. I decided to be
honest.
"I wish I wouldn't have married Leah. I wish that I would have waited until I was
really in love with someone before I got married. I wish I would have seen how
wonderful you were even earlier than I did. I wish I would have done things
differently with you so you'd know beyond a shadow of a doubt how much you
truly mean to me."

A tear spilled over her cheek. I reached over and wiped it away with my finger.
Ness pulled away from me and walked over to one of the large windows
overlooking the ocean.

"What about Nahuel?" she wondered heartbreakingly.

"If you decide in your heart that you want to be with him instead of me, I won't
interfere with that. What I'm proposing is that we try dating. We can keep it
just between us if you want."

"That's stupid and destructive," Ness said with a shake of her head. She didn't
say anything for the next few minutes.

Just as I was about to accept defeat, she turned to me and said, "Okay, Jacob.
Let's try this and see where it takes us."

Chapter 10 – Many Firsts

Ness's POV

I applied mascara to my eyelashes as carefully as I could considering my hands

were shaking like a leaf. Putting the finishing touches to my appearance, I
examined myself carefully in the bathroom mirror. Tonight was my first official
date with Jacob.

I didn't look like someone who was about to go out with the man of their
dreams. I looked anxious and tired. I had done my best to cover up the dark
circles under my eyes, but I hadn't slept well the night before and it showed. It
was a good thing we were only eating at the house.

Jake had ordered Jenny to take the day off. If she thought it was weird, she
didn't say anything. Since we weren't going out, I dressed semi-casual. I pulled
my hair back into a simple ponytail. For clothes, I decided to wear navy colored
slacks and a navy and cream striped top. I loved the comfortableness of the
outfit, but I still felt nervous. Sighing, I turned to exit the bathroom door, but
stopped before I reached the handle.

If I left the sanctuary of this room, I had a feeling nothing in my life would be
the same again. In the week since Jake asked me to give him a chance, I must
have changed my mind a thousand times. Yet, I never once voiced my
opposition. Instead, I pretended like everything was normal.
We'd played it cool all week, not wanting to give Jenny any clue as to what had
transpired between us. But Jacob had been relentless in the privacy of our
workouts. He flirted with me in ways that reminded me of the days before he
was married when he'd bring girlfriends over to our house.

I remembered my parents had invited him and some floozy over for dinner
once when I was around eleven. I'd had to endure him flirting with the woman
at our table as we ate. It had made me want to vomit all over my plate. After I
got done doing the dishes, I'd walked in on him and the woman making out on
my parents' couch. They had left shortly after with his hand on her butt, and I'd
spent the night writing in my diary how much I hated the woman.

I knew he'd had a lot of women before he married Leah. I was also aware that
he knew how to work all the angles. But he didn't seem insincere in his flirting
with me. When Jake wasn't putting the moves on me, he asked me a dozen
questions, all wanting to know more about the adult me. I had to admit, I was
thrilled by the attention. Jacob was finally seeing me. I should have been
ecstatic.

And I would have been if I wasn't living with gnawing guilt over Nahuel. By
going out with Jacob, I was cheating on Nahuel and he didn't deserve that. He'd
been so sweet to me the previous weekend when I had gone to visit him in
Seattle. I'd been stiff and unnatural the entire time I was with him. When he
tried to make a move on me, I'd rejected him and told him I had a headache.
All I could think about was returning home to Jake. I knew I had hurt his feelings
with my cold behavior. But he never once let his frustration show. I cried the
entire way home, the remorsefulness of it all overwhelming me.

I was being selfish. I knew I needed to end it with him. Nahuel deserved
someone better than me. It was hard though, because I did love him. The
problem was that I didn't love him enough. Jacob had owned my heart for as
long as I could remember. And now he was offering me a chance to actually be
with him. It was like all my fantasies were coming true.

That was the problem. I feared that this would be one big fat fantasy, and when
it was over I'd have nothing. I knew I'd never love anyone more than I did Jake.
Yet, Nahuel made me happy. Wasn't it stupid to give up a guy who could make
me feel like that? With Jake, I foresaw heartache. Nahuel could give me
everything I wanted in life; marriage, kids, all the while supporting me in
having a career.

But I knew if I did stay with him, I'd just be settling and that wasn't fair to
Nahuel. As conflicted as my feelings were, I knew I needed to let him go…just
as soon as I got up the nerve. That was the right thing to do, no matter what
happened between Jake and me.
With that decision finally made, I took a deep breath and stepped into the
hallway. The scent of something burning and Jacob swearing greeted my
senses. Hurrying into the kitchen, I saw him in his wheelchair near the oven
door, waving an oven mitt back and forth over what I assumed was pizza.

"Dammit to hell and back," Jacob muttered as he inspected the piece of

charcoal in disgust.

"Problems?" I asked, trying to hide a smirk.

Jake's head whipped in my direction. His eyes ran over me briefly before he
smiled. "You look nice."

"Thanks," I replied, trying not to blush. I still wasn't used to Jake's compliments.
"So was that our dinner?"

"Yeah," Jake grumbled, rolling his wheelchair over to the sink area.

He opened up a cupboard door and pulled out the garbage pail inside.
Grabbing a spatula off the counter, he rolled back to the oven and scooped the
pizza into the trash. I opened up the refrigerator and pulled out the items I'd
need for our new meal. The scent of scrambled eggs soon filled the kitchen.

"Sorry about this," Jacob said in a frustrated tone as he watched me work. "I
wanted tonight to be nice and casual, and here you are cooking our meal."

"It's fine," I told him, scooping some eggs out and putting it on a plate for him.

He still looked disappointed. "This doesn't really set the mood though."

"And frozen pizza does?" I joked.

Jake gave me a half smile. "Probably not, but I thought that…"

"What?" I asked curiously when he stopped.

He shrugged. "I've been watching you all week. Sometimes you seem so tense I
was afraid you might break our date. I wanted to keep tonight as light and
informal as possible."

My heart melted a little. I didn't even think Jake noticed my unnatural behavior.

I bit my lip before admitting, "I'm not going to lie. I'm not entirely comfortable
with this. You're still technically married and I…I don't want to hurt Nahuel
and-"

"But you know it's only a matter of weeks and then I'll be divorced, right?"
Jacob interrupted.
"I know," I said, reaching over to cup his face tenderly. "I just can't help but
wonder if we aren't making a mistake."

"Nessie." Jake grabbed my hand and held it against his skin. "We don't have to
do this. I want us to try…God, I want it more than you could know…but I don't
want you to do anything you're uncomfortable with."

"I know that, too," I returned. "Like you said, I want to see what happens
between us."

I badly wanted to sit on his lap and kiss him. He had a full bottom lip that made
me ache to run my tongue along it. Instead, I moved away from him and
grabbed my food, saying, "We should eat before our food gets cold."

Jake kept the conversation light during our meal. He carefully avoided bringing
up anything that would remind me of Nahuel. I got up once while we ate and
grabbed a bottle of wine. After we managed to finish it off in a relatively short
time, our conversation became a lot more loose, probably having to do with the
fact that I was feeling lightheaded from the alcohol.

"How old were you when you lost your virginity?" Jake asked, as he poured the
rest of the wine into my glass.

Picking it up, I swirled it into my glass sophisticatedly before swallowing some.

Giggling, I answered, "I lost it on my twentieth birthday."

"Your birthday?" Jake sat up in his chair. "You mean the night of your party
when you were wearing that purple dress?"

"Yep," I answered, making a popping noise when I emphasized the "p."

"Who'd you sleep with?" Jake questioned. I frowned as I picked up underlining

anger in his tone.

"Mike Newton," I said, watching his reaction carefully.

"Mike Newton!" Jake practically shouted. "That geek your dad works with?"

"He's not a geek," I defended. "He's very sweet."

"He's a loser," Jake spit out. "Why would you sleep with someone like that?"

"Why are you getting pissed off? That was two years ago."

"Because I…" Jake stopped, looking frustrated.

"Because what?" I asked, bemused by his reaction. "Are you seriously judging
me here? As I recall, you had sex with Leah on my father's desk at that party."
"That's only because I wanted you and couldn't touch you," Jake answered
angrily before a look of surprise crossed his face, as though he had let that last
part out by accident.

"Oh," I said before giggling. "You're jealous."

Jacob's face relaxed before he chuckled. "Maybe a little."

I finished off my wine before I put my elbow on the table, resting my head in
my hand. "All right, I've admitted my dirty little secret, now spill. How old were
you when you lost your virginity?"

Jake suddenly looked very awkward. He wouldn't meet my eyes as he told me,
"I was fifteen."

"And who was the lucky woman?" I questioned, secretly planning to root
through Jake's house for his yearbook so that I could see what the girl looked
like.

"Uh…no one you know," he replied, grabbing his plate quickly from the table
and wheeling himself over to the dishwasher.

"Yeah, but what was her name?" I insisted.

"It was a long time ago," Jake countered.

"And you don't remember the name of the first girl you slept with?" I asked in
disbelief.

"Something like that," Jake muttered as he made his way into the living room. I
cleaned up the kitchen quickly before joining him. Jake settled himself on the
couch and I sat next to him, sitting closer than necessary.

"I think you remember her name, you just don't want to tell me," I finally said.

"Hmm," was his only response.

"So why wouldn't you want to tell me?" I analyzed more to myself than him.
"Could it be because you loved her so much that she broke your heart, making
it impossible for you to even mention her without breaking out into big, weepy
girlish tears?"

Jake raised an eyebrow at me but I continued, "Or maybe it's because I know
her and the sex was so bad you don't want me to find out."

My mind started to race as I tried to think of acquaintances from my parents

and Jake's past. All I could come up with was Aunt Alice. The idea of him
sleeping with her made me feel queasy.
Jacob snorted at my comment. "If that's what you want to think…"

He reached out and grabbed my arm, running his fingers up and down the
length of it. If his plan was to distract me, it was working. I tried not to shiver as
I reacted to his touch.

"I can't see you being bad in bed though…" I murmured absentmindedly.

Jake chuckled, the sound deep and throaty. "Thanks. Been giving this a lot of
thought, have you?"

"No," I said, my attention returning instantly as I realized what I'd said. I felt my
face flush in embarrassment.

Jake gave me a seductive smile, but instead of pursuing me, he said, "Why
don't you put in a movie?"

Getting up eagerly, I went over to the DVD cabinet to peruse his selection of
movies.

"What are you in the mood for?" I asked.

"How about a classic," Jake suggested.

"Ghostbusters?" I questioned, pulling the movie off the shelf to inspect the
cover.

I heard Jake laugh before he said, "I guess that would be a classic to you."

I glared at him and grabbed another movie I saw. "How about The Godfather?"

"Ha, ha," Jake grumbled in return. I smiled in victory. Jake didn't like being
reminded that he was my godfather because then he was forced to remember
our age difference. He was touchier about that than any woman I knew.

We finally decided on Casablanca. It was pretty fitting considering it was about

a forbidden love. As I watched the hero and heroine part ways at the end, I felt
slightly depressed. Granted, it was just a movie, but they had an epic love and
it hadn't worked out.

Jacob, sensing that my spirits had suddenly taken a nose dive, picked a
comedy for us to watch next. I spent the next couple of hours laughing at the
antics of the characters. When it was over, we decided to call it a night. Ever
the gentleman, Jake walked me to my bedroom door.

"Tonight was fun, Jacob, thank you," I told him honestly.

"Does this mean you'll go out with me again?" he asked warmly. The look he
gave me sent my heart pounding against my chest. All I could do was nod.
"How about next Saturday? We can go to Port Angeles for lunch and maybe a
movie," he offered.

"I'd like that," I replied. "But you have to drive."

Jake instantly frowned. "I haven't driven since before the accident."

"I know," I said. "I've been giving this some thought, and I want to reintroduce
you to the world of independence. Let's try getting you behind the wheel
sometime this coming week."

"Nessie, I don't know…"

"What do you have to lose?"

Jake snorted. "Just our lives. What if I lose control?"

"I'll make an appointment for you to meet with a Driver Rehabilitation

Specialist. He or she will be able to assess what equipment you need to get you
back on the road. And I'll be with you the entire time."

Still looking unsure, Jacob finally nodded before his mouth formed into a wicked
smile. "Okay, I'll do it under one condition."

"What's that?" I asked suspiciously.

"You have to give me a good night kiss," he replied, looking mischievous. I

rolled my eyes and bent down, lightly brushing my lips against his.

"I would have done it without the bribe," I whispered against his mouth. Before
I could back away, Jacob grabbed my hips and pulled me onto his lap. I landed,
making a slight "oof" noise.

"Yeah, but this way is more fun," Jake retorted, moving me so that I was more
fully on his lap.

He cupped the back of my neck and reclaimed my lips with his. His kiss was
gentle at first, before his lips became more demanding, pressing more urgently
against mine. I felt a spurt of ecstasy shoot through me as he nibbled lightly on
my bottom lip. I turned and pressed my breasts against his chest and felt his
arms encircle me in response, holding me tightly to him. His tongue peeked out
and traced the seam of my lips before pushing in to explore the recesses of my
mouth. My own tongue met his eagerly, seeking. I squirmed on his lap as I
began to ache for him and heard Jacob moan in return as his body began to
harden underneath me. He broke away, his breathing heavy as he rested his
forehead against mine. Jake closed his eyes for a minute, before opening them
to look at me tenderly.
"Good night, Renesmee," he finally murmured. I tried not to let my hurt show
as I slid of off his lap.

"Good night," I mumbled. Before I could take a step away, Jake grabbed my
hand.

"Ness, I'm sure you felt how much I want you. But I want to do this right," he
said, giving me a sheepish smile. "I'm trying to court you here."

The sting of his rejection dissipated as though it never existed. Though the idea
was completely archaic, it was also quite possibly the most romantic thing I'd
ever heard in my life.

Trying not to smile, I said, "Oh, I see. Well, good night then."

He kissed my hand before whispering once more, "Good night."

I entered my room and closed the door behind me, leaning against it and trying
my best not to squeal like a schoolgirl. The next day, Jenny was back. I think
she had a pretty good idea what Jake and I had been up to from the way we
kept smiling at each other, but thankfully she didn't say anything.

Monday morning, I made an appointment for Jake to meet with a Driver

Rehabilitation Specialist in Forks. Being the granddaughter of Dr. Carlisle Cullen
had its perks. I was able to get Jake in the next day.

We met with the specialist early in the morning. The man showed Jacob the
latest technology in driving with paralysis. It was decided because of Jake's full
upper body mobility that they would put a control stick next to the center
console in Jacob's Escalade which would then be connected to the car's main
controls. If Jake pushed the stick backwards, the car would accelerate. If he
thrust it forward, the car would come to a stop. He could also move the stick
from side to side to activate the left and right turn signals. Not only that, but he
could activate the headlights, windshield wipers, and horn all from the control
stick.

The specialist took Jake onto the rehabilitation center's driver's range so that
he could get a feel for the controls. After a few hours, he was maneuvering
around without even the slightest hesitation. The specialist was so pleased with
Jake's progress, he let Jake drive him on the open road. Jacob passed that little
test with flying colors as well.

The sheer joy on Jake's face reminded me of his expression when we'd gone
swimming, and he was able to move around for the first time without his
wheelchair. I had to turn my face away so that Jacob wouldn't see my
emotional tears. Much to Jake's excitement, the specialist, who was also a
qualified driver's trainer, certified that Jake was able to drive again. After we
left the center, we grabbed a light lunch before heading over to the
Washington State Department of Licensing office. Though Jake had been
driving for years, he needed to be issued a new license that accommodated his
disability. After waiting for about an hour, we left the office with Jake's brand
new driver's license in his pocket. He paused once we reached his car.

"Well?" I asked.

"You want me to drive home?" he questioned, his voice nervous.

"I just watched you drive around a driver's range for the past few hours," I told
him dryly. "I have absolute confidence that you'll be able to get us back to La
Push in one piece."

Smiling at me shakily, Jake got behind the wheel. Operating the controls the
way he'd been taught, we were soon on the road and headed for home. Once
we reached La Push, he kept driving, going straight past the turn off that led to
our house. We drove from one end of the reservation to the next and then
repeated the same journey several times. I started to laugh and he turned the
car around so that we could do the drive once again.

"Are we going to be joyriding all evening?" I asked.

"Sorry," Jake chuckled. "I just can't get over it. I'm driving again."

He finally pulled the car into a parking lot that overlooked First Beach. Easing
the control stick forward, he brought the car to a stop. Putting it into park, he
sat back in his seat and stared out at the ocean. It was getting cloudy. I had a
feeling we were going to be getting a storm any minute, yet Jacob had a
contented, carefree smile on his face. He reached over and grabbed my hand,
bringing it up to his lips so that he could kiss my palm.

"Thank you," he whispered.

"I didn't do anything," I said simply, cupping his cheek in my hand.

"You have no idea of how much you've done for me," Jake returned. "I would be
completely lost without you."

"You would have found your way eventually," I countered.

Jacob instantly shook his head in disagreement. "I don't think so. My life has
been dark and miserable for a long time, Nessie, even before the accident. You
make me feel alive again. I always feel alive when I'm with you."

He leaned close to me and ran his thumb against my bottom lip. I closed my
eyes at his touch. They jerked open when I felt his mouth plant a series of light
shivery kisses against my lips. My emotions were about to skid out of control
when Jake pulled away.

"Jenny's probably wondering where we are," he murmured.

"Yeah," I replied, trying not to show my disappointment that he ended things

again when they were starting to get good. I got that he was trying to "court"
me, but if he was secretly trying to drive me out of my mind, it was working.

The rest of the week flew by and before I knew it, Saturday was upon me. This
time, I got ready for our date with a lot more enthusiasm. I decided to wear a
white Calvin Klein Jeans dress, which had a wide scoop neck, eyelet trim, and a
thin relaxed fit belt to go around my waist. I matched it with long, dangly
earrings and gold strappy sandals. I decide to leave my hair down. Jacob had
mentioned during one of our weekly workouts that he loved to see it when I left
it loose and wild.

As I was about to leave my bedroom to join Jacob, my phone rang. Looking

down at it, I sighed when I saw it was Nahuel again. He had called me a few
times since I last saw him, but I hadn't had the nerve to answer the phone. I
had to talk to him soon though. Perhaps tomorrow, I would make a special trip
to Seattle to see him. I felt sick with myself for letting things go this far without
ending my relationship with Nahuel first. My heart broke as I brought his
handsome face to mind. It killed me that I was going to hurt him, but it had to
be done. Now that I was officially cheating on him, there was no going back
anyway.

Filled with despair, I tried to mentally shake it off as I went into the living room
where Jake was waiting for me. I took a moment to examine him unnoticed. He
was busy looking at the movie times listed in the newspaper. I felt my heart
turn over as I stared at him. He was so beautiful, even in something as simple
as a blue plaid shirt and khaki shorts. Even with my heart torn up over Nahuel, I
couldn't regret going out with Jacob.

"Hey Nessie, you look nice," Jenny said, causing Jake to snap his head in my
direction. I went over to the kitchen area.

"Thanks Jen," I replied. "So what are your plans for today?"

"Well, since you two are hanging out today in Port Angeles," Jenny answered,
giving us a suspiciously knowing look. "Rachel and Paul invited me over for a
game of cards."

"Give my nieces and nephew a hug for me," Jake said as he rolled over to us.
He looked at me and his eyes softened. "You do look really beautiful. Ready?"
I nodded and Jake headed out the front door. I was about to follow him when
Jenny called out, "Ness, be careful."

I turned and looked at her. "We're just going to have lunch and a movie."

"You know what I mean," Jenny replied. "I'm not stupid. I've seen a change in
you two this week. And I'm happy for you. But you're playing with fire, honey."

I felt my shoulders sag, but I nodded at her in acknowledgement before

following Jacob outside. I already knew that this could be the biggest mistake of
my life. It was still worth the risk though.

Jake and I talked and laughed the entire way to Port Angeles, Jacob being in an
especially happy mood as he got to drive again. By the time we got to the
restaurant, I was completely relaxed. After we ate our lunch, we headed over
to the movie theater. We made it to our seats just in time for the previews. Jake
had insisted that we sit in the back row, which would have been a problem due
to the fact that the theater had stadium seating, but we were able to take an
elevator to the second floor and enter the theater from a back side entrance.

I went into the row first. I was about to sit in the end seat, when Jake put his
hand on my butt and gave me a little push. My heart skipped a beat at his
touch, but I turned around and looked at him with a raised eyebrow.

"I'm going to sit there," he said lowly and I nodded. Using his arms, he grabbed
the seat's armrests and maneuvered into it. Folding his wheelchair up, he
placed it behind him and out of the way before smiling at me proudly. I giggled
and sat down next to him.

The movie was just underway when Jake leaned over and whispered to me, "Do
you know what I like about this theater?"

"No," I shook my head, hypnotized by the hints of seduction I could hear in his
voice.

"This," Jake said with a smirk. He reached for the end of the armrest that was
between us and lifted it up and out of the way. Without the barrier blocking us,
he wrapped his arm around me, and brought me close to his side. I sighed in
contentment.

Halfway through the movie, I was so completely engrossed in what I was

watching that I almost jumped out of my seat when I felt Jake's hand on my
thigh. He had moved his arm from around my waist some time ago, but I'd
hardly noticed. Now, I was completely focused on him as his fingers made
circular patterns near my knee. My stomach did a somersault when his hand
became bolder, running from the inside of my knee to just stopping inches
from the juncture of my thighs, before returning back to the same spot. He did
this repeatedly. I wondered briefly at the wisdom of wearing a dress today
even as my legs parted without conscious thought. He took this as a signal of
consent. His hand bunched my dress up as he went straight to the top of my
inner thigh and froze. I could feel the heat of his pinky finger millimeters away
from my center.

I continued to stare at the screen, praying that no one would look over and see
what Jake and I were up to. Thankfully, we had the back row to ourselves and
the theater was only half full. But to act like this in public was something I'd
never done before. And I had to admit, I kind of liked it. There was the element
of the forbidden, of possibly getting caught. I could feel myself becoming
slightly damp at the idea.

Jake must have felt a change in me because his finger finally made contact
with my aching need. He began to move his pinky back and forth against my
mound. My breath became shallower as pleasure began to radiate throughout
my entire body. Jake's hand shifted and I suddenly felt his index finger and
thumb touch my tender bud, playing with it through my panties. I closed my
eyes as a new wave of desire hit me. Needing more, I slid down in my seat so
that my lower half could arch up. Jacob's hand covered me completely,
caressing me gently until I was pressing myself frantically against him. My own
hand moved over his and together we began to massage me. I completely
forgot that we were in a public theater at that point. I felt myself getting close
when Jake stopped and pulled away. I let out a mew of protest, which earned
me a devilish laugh from my tormenter.

"Baby, you have to keep quiet," Jake whispered and I nodded.

I felt his hand return, only this time he went under the barrier of my panties
and straight to the heart of me. My eyes rolled as I felt his fingers run along my
aroused flesh.

"Fuck," Jake muttered thickly as he felt my wet heat.

His finger circled the outer lips of my warm center before dipping inside. I
grabbed onto his arm and held on tight as he began to move his hand. His pace
was tauntingly slow, sending pulses of bliss-filled agony through me with every
thrust. I didn't know how much more I could take when he added a second
finger and picked up the speed. I was just starting to climb towards my peak
when Jacob twisted his hand slightly, found my pleasure spot, and I was done. I
went skyrocketing, turning my head to bite his shoulder in an attempt to keep
quiet as I burst into sweet release. I closed my eyes and feared that I might
blackout as my entire body began to tremble.

"You okay, Ness?" Jake murmured near my ear. I opened my tired lids so that I
could stare at him.
I wanted to tell him that I loved him.

Instead, I leaned in close and pressed my lips to his, whispering, "Thank you."

"You're welcome," Jacob replied, giving me a kiss that was surprising gentle
after the recent eruption of pleasure I'd just experienced because of him.

The movie soon ended and we left the theater and headed for home. Unlike the
relaxed journey to Port Angeles, the drive back was filled with unspoken sexual
tension. Neither of us made much effort to speak. Jake flicked on the radio and
I turned my head to stare out the window, watching the world get darker as
night set in. I couldn't wait for us to get home. If what happened in the theater
was a preview of things to come, I had a feeling I was in for a night to
remember.

What I didn't expect was what was waiting for me when we finally reached our
destination.

Nahuel. Sitting on the front porch. His face thunderous.

Chapter 11 – Poker Night

Ness's POV

I couldn't wait for us to get home. If what happened in the theater was a
preview of things to come, I had a feeling I was in for a night to remember.

What I didn't expect was what was waiting for me when we finally reached our
destination.

Nahuel. Sitting on the front porch. His face thunderous.

"What the hell is he doing here?" Jake asked, a bite in his tone.

"I-I don't know," I whispered, suddenly feeling sick with shame. "I haven't been
answering his calls lately."

"Do you want me to run him over with the car?" Jake joked sadistically. "I could
say it was an accident."

I closed my eyes wearily. "Jacob, please."

"Sorry," he apologized immediately. "I guess we should go out and speak with
him."

I looked over at him cautiously. "What do you mean 'we'?"

"I'm not going to leave you alone with him."

"Why not?" I asked in confusion.

"What if he hurts you?" Jake questioned, running a hand tensely through his
hair.

I rolled my eyes at that. "He won't hurt me. And I need to speak with him
alone."

"Nessie-"

"Alone, Jacob," I stated firmly.

"Fine," he grumbled, opening the car door, before turning around in his seat to
reach for his wheelchair which was behind him. He was soon rolling himself
towards the house. He paused momentarily when he reached Nahuel. I held my
breath waiting for him to say something, but instead he shook his head and
went inside. I slowly got out of the car and walked over to my boyfriend.

"Hey," I remarked. "What are you doing here?"

"I was worried about you," Nahuel replied, his body stiff. "I guess I didn't realize
you'd be out with your godfather. What the hell were you doing out with him
anyway?"

"Like you said, he's my godfather," I returned, trying to not sound as guilty as I
felt. "It wouldn't be the first time we went out."

"Really?" Nahuel asked bitterly. "And you always dress like that for a casual
day out with someone who isn't your boyfriend?"

I didn't say anything. What could I say? I knew the guilt was written all over my
face for Nahuel to see.

"Renesmee, you've changed," he said quietly. "Before you moved in here with
him, we seemed to both have the exact same goals in life. Now…you're
different. I thought that maybe you'd want to get married, yet you won't even
discuss it. You break our dates so that you can come rushing back here all the
time, you blow me off when I try to get intimate with you, and then you avoid
my phone calls. Please credit me with having some intelligence. Is something
going on between you and your godfather?"

"Nahuel, I-" My face flushed, but I couldn't go on. It didn't matter. Nahuel could
read the duplicity in my expression. He started pacing back and forth in front of
me, swearing in his native language the entire time.

"How long?" he finally asked.

"It hasn't even really started yet," I murmured quietly.

"Really started?" Nahuel snapped. "What the fuck does that mean?"
"We went out for the first time tonight."

"Oh, well in that case I feel much better," he replied sarcastically, his accent
become heavy. "Don't you think I deserved some courtesy here, Renesmee?
We've been dating for over a year now, I proposed to you, and you couldn't
even bother to break it off with me before moving on to that son of a bitch."

Before I could even make a comment, he asked, "Have you slept with him?"

"No," I responded immediately. My mind instantly flashed to the movies, my

face becoming hotter as memories of Jacob pleasuring me in the darkened
theater began to invade my mind.

"But you've let him touch you," Nahuel stated, reading me so clearly yet again.

"I'm sorry," I whispered.

His face crumpled. Before I knew what was happening, he grabbed my

shoulders, though his grip wasn't painful.

"Why?" he roared even as his voice broke with emotion. "Why would you do
this to us? Why would you do this to me? Why Renesmee?"

"I'm sorry," I repeated, tears beginning to spill from my eyes. I had caused the
look of devastation he was now wearing. I went to put my hand on his chest,
but he started to back away, his grip on my shoulders loosening. Unfortunately,
to an outsider looking at us, they wouldn't have known Nahuel was releasing
me.

Jake's voice resounded through the air. "Get your fucking hands off of her!"

Nahuel immediately let go only to run over to the porch where Jacob was
sitting. Before I could guess his intention, he drew back his hand and punched
Jake hard in the face. Jacob's face snapped sideways. Nahuel went to punch
him again, but Jake was expecting it this time, he drew up his arm and blocked
the shot while giving Nahuel a sucker punch to the stomach with his other
hand. Nahuel stumbled back, clutching his stomach as he gasped for air.

"Stop it, both of you," I yelled just as Jake lunged himself out of his chair and
grabbed Nahuel's waist, sending them both hurtling to the ground.

They began to roll, each doing their best to get in a few good jabs. I ran over
and tried to separate them, but I somehow got caught in the crossfire. As I bent
down towards them, Jake's elbow drew back. My face made impact and I fell to
the ground with a whimper, clutching the area beneath my left eye.

The porch light came on distracting the men. Jenny came out in a short
bathrobe and fluffy pink slippers.
"What in the Sam Hill is going on out here?" she shouted. Looking at me with
wide eyes, she asked, "Did Nahuel punch you?"

"Of course not," Nahuel snapped in an affronted tone at the same time I
replied, "No, my face ran into Jacob's elbow."

"What?" Jake asked me, his eyes running over my face. He looked sick as his
gaze lingered on the area under my eye which was now aching.

Nahuel shoved Jacob away from him and stood up, taking a moment to brush
off his pants. Without giving me another look, he walked over to his car and got
in. With the engine revving, he tore out of the driveway, the tires screeching as
he went.

"Ness," Jenny said. "You better put some ice on that eye."

"Nessie, I'm so sorry," Jake whispered from where he was sitting on the ground.
"I didn't mean to hurt you."

"I know," I replied dully.

Without even offering to help him get into his chair, I went inside and grabbed
a ready made ice packet out of the refrigerator before heading to my room. I
stripped off my dress and threw it in my hamper. I didn't want to see it. I
suddenly felt dirty for what I'd allowed Jacob to do to me at the theater. I had
no business acting that way when I was still committed to Nahuel. I had
behaved no better than a common slut, and I had hurt a guy who'd always
treated me like a queen. Nahuel hadn't deserved what happened tonight. He
certainly hadn't deserved to find out about Jake and me the way he did.

I grabbed the tank top and shorts that I normally wore to bed and went into the
bathroom connected to my room. I removed my bra before throwing on my
pajamas. I grabbed my makeup remover and moved in front of the mirror so
that I could see what I was doing. I gasped at my reflection.

My face was so pale it reminded me of a corpse. Under my left eye, my face

was puffy and violet. I'd have a bruise tomorrow. I touched it tenderly and
winced at the accompanying pain. But it was what was in my eyes that
disturbed me the most. I looked so shamefully guilty for what I'd done. I
finished getting ready for bed without taking a second glance in the mirror and
made my way back into my room. I'd just laid down on the mattress when I
heard a soft knock on the door.

"Nessie?" Jacob whispered. "Ness, are you up?"

I held my breath, not answering him. I wasn't ready to face him just yet. I didn't
know if I'd ever be able to face him again after what we did tonight. And a part
of me was extremely ticked off at Jacob for the fight. Granted, Nahuel threw
the first punch, but Jake didn't need to retaliate. He shouldn't have come out to
check on me in the first place. I told him I wanted to talk to Nahuel alone.

He must have known I was still up, because I heard him sigh before saying,
"Please Renesmee, open up."

I put the ice packet on my sore face instead. Jacob let out another deep breath.

"I guess I'll talk to you tomorrow then," he said tiredly. "I am sorry for what
happened tonight."

I felt a tear spill from the corner of my good eye. I heard Jacob's wheelchair roll
away from my door. I got out of bed and hit the light switch, sending the room
into darkness. I laid back down and curled up on my side, finally breaking loose
and sobbing my heart out. I knew that for as long as I lived, I'd never forget the
expression on Nahuel's face when he found out that I fooled around with Jacob.
With the ice pack between my head and my pillow, I continued to cry until I fell
into an exhausted sleep.

The next morning I got up and took a quick shower. I didn't even bother to look
at my complexion as I threw my hair back into a wet ponytail and left the
sanctuary of my room. I could hear Jenny and Jacob talking quietly as I
approached. They both immediately stopped talking as I entered the room. I
noticed with some satisfaction that Jake had a nice bruise on his cheek where
Nahuel had punched him.

"Shit," Jacob muttered as he rolled over to me. Reaching out for my hand, he
tugged me down until I was eye level with him. His thumb ran soothingly over
my bruised skin.

"Does it hurt?" he whispered.

"No, it feels friggin fantastic," I replied sarcastically, pulling away from him so
that I could get a half of a grapefruit out of the refrigerator. I placed it in a bowl
and carried it over to the kitchen table. Jacob rolled over to me and began to
eat some toast that Jenny had prepared. He kept glancing at me, but I ignored
him.

"A bunch of the guys are coming over on Wednesday," Jake told me
conversationally. "It's Collin's birthday. Do you remember Collin?"

I nodded as I scooped some of my fruit up with a spoon. Jacob continued, "Well,

he's coming over, along with Quil, Embry, Seth, and Brady. We're having a
mini-poker tournament. You're welcome to join us."

"That's okay," I replied, still not looking at him.

"Are you going to need me there?" Jenny asked, her voice high-pitched. Jacob
and I both looked at her inquisitively.

"Yeah. If you could make your special chicken wings, that'd be great," Jake
responded. "And we should probably stock up on the beer."

"Fine," Jenny said, her face grim.

Jacob looked from her to me and muttered something that sounded like
"women." I didn't say anything as I got up and carried my dirty bowl over to the
sink. Jenny eyed me sympathetically.

"I think we still have another ice packet in the freezer," she stated. "Do you
want it?"

"I look that bad, huh?"

"Didn't you look at yourself in the mirror this morning?"

"I didn't want to," I replied.

"Well, you look like shit."

"Thanks, Jen. I appreciate that," I said dryly.

"I'm just saying." She shrugged. "You should take it easy. You don't have a
workout with Jake today, right?"

"No, it's Sunday," I explained. I glanced over my shoulder and found Jake
watching us. He had a preoccupied expression on his face as he listened to our
conversation.

"Definitely a day to relax then," Jenny remarked.

"I was thinking of going swimming," Jacob spoke up. "You want to join me,
Renesmee?"

My mind instantly drifted to the last time we went swimming. That was the first
time we'd ever really kissed. Thinking of that made me automatically
remember Jake and me together in the theater the night before. I felt my face
flame.

"No thanks," I responded to his question in a choked voice. "I think I will go lay
down for a bit. I didn't get much sleep last night."

Jacob's face instantly became concerned, but I went back to ignoring him.
Hurrying over to the freezer, I grabbed another ice pack and went to my room.
I remained there for the rest of the day, only coming out for meals. I knew I
was being childish, but I didn't know how to handle myself. A part of me longed
to join Jacob in whatever part of the house he was in, but I denied myself that
pleasure. It was punishment after the lousy way I'd treated Nahuel. And I was
feeling depressed over my breakup. I did love Nahuel in my own way. It just
wasn't enough.

A part of me felt embarrassed, too. Jacob had been a part of my life for as long
as I could remember. I was feeling a little weirded out by what happened
between us and needed time to adjust.

But mostly I was scared. While I'd been in the middle of breaking up with
Nahuel, a part of me had felt relieved. As fickle as it made me, ending things
with Nahuel meant that I had a clear path to pursuing a relationship with Jacob.
I was now willing to admit to myself that I had never stopped loving him. Even
when I thought I had gotten past it and buried my feelings deep inside me, it
was a waste of time. No one ever compared to him; no one ever would. He was
everything I wanted in life. That didn't mean he felt the same way about me. I
spent a turbulent night's sleep worrying over that fact.

The next morning we did our normal physical therapy session. I felt like I was
twelve again, too nervous to even speak in front of him. This behavior lasted
until Wednesday afternoon. Jacob had watched me carefully, waiting for me to
relax. When that didn't happen, he finally lost his cool.

"Is this the way it's going to be between us from now on?" he grunted as I
made him work out on the rowing machine.

"What do you mean?" I asked innocently.

"The silent treatment you've been giving me the past few days," he responded
impatiently. "Look, I'm sorry I got in a fight with lover boy, okay?"

"Don't talk about him that way," I snapped.

"Is that what this is about?" Jacob questioned, his eyebrows pulling into a
frown. "Are you upset because of the breakup with Nahuel?"

"Shouldn't I be?" I retorted bitterly. "I cheated on him. I broke his heart, Jacob.
After over a year together, I treated him with complete disregard. Don't you
think I should have some emotions over that?"

He turned off the machine and made his way over to the mats. I marveled
secretly as I watched the muscles in his arms bulge as he pulled himself across
the floor. I automatically reached for his legs, stretching them as we continued
to talk.

"You really loved him, didn't you?" Jacob asked.

"He's a good person," I countered and silently cursed as Jake's eyes narrowed.
Before I knew it, I was on my back with Jacob hovering over me. He quickly
glanced down to make sure his lower half wasn't crushing me, but he had
managed to place his legs between mine. Satisfied, he looked back at me.

"You didn't answer my question."

"Yes, I loved him."

"But?"

"I didn't love him enough, okay?" I cried. "I wanted to love him like he loved
me, and I feel horrible for not being a good enough girlfriend."

"Renesmee," Jacob replied softly. "You can't force yourself to love anyone.
Trust me, I have firsthand experience in this area. I thought I could love Leah
and look how that turned out."

"I shouldn't have cheated on him though," I sniffed.

"Maybe not," Jacob answered. He moved his hand so that the back of his
knuckles could brush my cheek. "But you were following your heart. There's
nothing wrong with that."

"How do you know what's in my heart?" I whispered shakily.

His thumb moved to my bottom lip, running across it before pressing down
lightly, causing my mouth to part slightly.

"I know that our kiss in the pool was ten times more passionate than anything I
ever saw happen between you and him."

"Conceited much?" I remarked lamely.

"Nah." Jacob smiled at me in a way that sent a jolt straight to my heart. "I'm
just truthful. He might not thank you now, but in the long run, you'll both be
happier."

"And you speak from such great experience?"

"Yes," Jake replied simply. "You two weren't meant to be together."

"Then who am I supposed to be with?" I wondered sardonically.

"I thought that was obvious," Jacob whispered seconds before he lowered his
mouth to mine.

The kiss was like being touched by the sun, completely consuming. I
instinctively reached up and wrapped my arms around his neck, bringing him
more fully against me. He shifted, his weight bearing down on me, though it
wasn't uncomfortable. It felt so perfectly right. He showered kisses against my
lips before moving down to my jaw. I threw my head back, giving him access to
my neck. He proceeded to kiss along the skin there, before running his teeth
over the sensitized flesh. A sudden tingling shot over my body until it reached
my center which began to throb in longing. I closed my eyes as I let sensation
take over.

"Renesmee," Jacob said softly, his mouth moving to my ear. He licked the rim
of it, before lightly blowing on it. I shivered in return. "Do you know what I want
right now?"

"Hmm," I murmured as I ran my fingers through his hair.

"Beef."

My eyes shot open. "What?"

"I want beef. You hungry?"

"Are you serious?" I asked, my body beginning to overheat. I was ready to jump
him and he was talking about food.

"Aren't you hungry?" he questioned, his eyes filled with mirth.

"I guess I'm not hungry for the same thing you are," I grumbled.

Jacob chuckled. "Ness, as much as I'd love to finish what we have going on
here, the guys are going to be over here shortly for Collin's birthday/poker
game. Now if you want to greet them in your skimpy workout clothes, I guess
that's all right, as long as you stick by my side. Especially around Collin. He's a
pervert."

I looked down and saw that my clothes were clinging to me in all the wrong
ways after the friction Jacob and I had created. The hardened points of my
breasts were sticking out for all to see. Making an "eep" noise, I pushed Jake off
and scrambled to my feet, pulling at my clothes.

Jacob sighed dramatically before remarking, "Pity."

"What was that about Collin being the pervert?" I asked with a raised eyebrow.

Jacob grinned in response. "Yes, but that's different. I'm your pervert so that
makes it okay."

I rolled my eyes at him. "Whatever, perv."

Grabbing his wheelchair, I brought it over to him and watched as he got settled
into it. Reaching out for my hand, he kissed it tenderly before letting me go so
that he could get changed. I went into my room and took a quick shower,
before pulling on black pants and a black silk top that hugged my shape. Piling
my hair on top of my head, I pulled a few tendrils loose for effect. I also added
half a pound of cover-up on my face. By the time I was done, the bruise wasn't
even noticeable. Thank goodness for Aunt Alice and her incessant make-up
tips. I added a pair of black sandals to the outfit and went into the kitchen.
Jenny was dressed in a nice wrap around dress. Her blond hair was pulled back
on the sides. She would have looked gorgeous if she hadn't appeared so
frazzled.

"You need any help?" I offered.

"Yeah, thanks," Jenny replied, handing me several bottles of different dips.

"Can you pour each one of those into the bowls I have laid out?"

"Sure," I answered. I walked over to the island and began to pour each one into
their individual bowls. Next I grabbed some celery sticks out of the refrigerator
that Jenny had already cut up and laid them artistically on a tray. There was a
knock on the door just as I was finishing up so I went to go answer it. Seth's
smiling face greeted me.

"Hey Nessie," he said, stepping forward to give me a hug. "You look amazing."

"Thanks, so do you," I told him and I meant it. He was wearing black pants and
a button down black shirt. He looked good, but he shrugged off my
compliment. His eyes immediately went to Jenny in the kitchen.

"You want some help there, Jen?" he asked, walking over to her.

"No, that's okay," she said formally.

Seth looked disappointed, but he didn't push it. He turned back to me.
"Where's Jake?"

"I'm here," Jacob responded, rolling himself into the room. He immediately
came over to me and grabbed my hand, intertwining our fingers. Seth watched
with interest.

"It's like that, is it?"

"No," I replied at the same time Jacob stated, "Yep."

Seth snorted. "So what happened to your face, Jake?"

"I got in a fight." He shrugged.

"You win?"
"I'd say it was a drawl," Jake replied, looking disgruntled. We were saved from
further discussion when Quil and Embry entered the house.

"Ness?" Embry questioned, his eyes running up and down my figure in an

exaggerated way. "Damn kid, you've grown up."

I laughed. "Yeah well, you haven't seen me since I was a teen."

I went over and gave him a hug. He instantly wrapped his arm around my waist
and started raising his eyebrows up and down suggestively.

"So, are you seeing anyone?"

"Yeah, she is." Jacob glared, coming over to us and grabbing my hand, giving it
a tug. I lost my balance and landed on his lap.

"Ness is involved with you?" Quil laughed as he looked at Jacob. "I thought Ness
had better taste than that."

"Ha, ha," Jake said, even as his arms tightened possessively around me.

"I must be doing something wrong," Embry grumbled. "First Quil hooks up with
Claire whose fifteen years younger and now this."

"Maybe you should try to hook up with a cougar instead," I suggested, raising
an eyebrow at him.

"Yeah," Embry said thoughtfully, rubbing his jaw. "Maybe that's what I need to
do."

Quil rolled his eyes and gave Embry a shove in Seth's direction. I looked at
Jacob.

"I guess this means we're going public?" I whispered, my face flushed.

"I hope you don't mind," Jake replied. "I just wanted them to know you weren't
available."

"You're a caveman, you know that, right?" I joked.

"Yes," Jake responded before lightly brushing his lips over mine. The rush of
blood filling my ears blocked out the sound of two more arrivals.

"Damn, did you start the party without me?"

I looked over and saw Collin and Brady standing in the doorway. Collin had a
mischievous expression on his face. Brady's was filled with condemnation.

"Hey guys, welcome," Jacob said jovially.

"You sharing there?" Collin asked, looking at me.

"Absolutely not," Jacob quickly replied.

"Isn't that your god-daughter?" Brady wondered.

"Yes, I am," I responded, lifting my head defensively.

"Isn't that incestuous or something?" he questioned condescendingly.

"They aren't related, numb nuts," Collin said, punching Brady on the shoulder.
Brady scowled before looking at Seth.

"Seth, I can't believe you're okay with this."

"Why wouldn't I be?" Seth asked through a mouth full of food. I noticed he was
hovering very close to Jenny who was looking flustered.

"He's married to your sister, isn't he?" Brady stated.

"My divorce will be final in a couple of weeks," Jacob gritted out. I could feel his
anger building by the tension in his body frame.

"Yeah," Seth added. "Besides, what happened between Jake and Leah was over
ages ago. If Jake can find some happiness, especially with someone as gracious
as Renesmee, then more power to him."

"I'm sorry." Brady shook his head. "I can't be a party to this. I understand,
Jacob, if you're going through some mid-life crisis, but to act this way while
you're still married, and with someone who you've told me you view as a niece
is just wrong. What do her parents have to say about your conduct?"

"My relationship with Renesmee is no one's concern but ours," Jake practically
growled. "And if you have an issue with it, then maybe you should leave."

"Fine," Brady retorted disdainfully. "Are you coming, Collin?"

"Of course not," he replied in disgust. "Thanks for being a dick though and
ruining the party."

Brady glared at him before turning on his heel and walking out the door. There
was an awkward silence in his wake.

"Sorry about him," Collin said apologetically. "He went to some religious camp
a few months back with his girlfriend, and ever since then he's become a bit of
a zealot."

Quil snorted. "He was okay with playing poker, but had issues with Jake moving
on with his life? What a douche."
"Well, fuck him," Embry said. "Let's get this party going, huh?"

We spent the next few hours playing poker. The guys spent that time ribbing
Jake over the bruise on his face. I was so thankful that they hadn't detected
mine. Jenny joined the game much to Seth's delight. The atmosphere was still
subdued compared to how it was before Brady got there.

I knew Jacob wanted to talk to me about what had happened. I could feel it in
the way he kept glancing at me throughout the night. But I was glad for the
reprieve. The truth was, I was feeling a little num after Brady's attack. When
everyone finally called it a night and left, Jacob led me to my bedroom door.

"Ness," Jake said, grabbing my hand. "What Brady said didn't mean anything."

I didn't look at him as I replied, "But it does mean something. He's only one
person judging us. What are others going to think about this?"

"They don't matter," Jacob insisted.

"What will my parents think?" I whispered.

Jake didn't say anything so I tugged my hand out of his grip and reached for
the door handle of my room.

"Okay," he finally said.

"Okay what?"

"Okay, we'll tell your parents."

"What?" I asked, swiveling around to look at him.

"Ness, I'm not with you as some sort of experiment. I've told you this before. I
want a long term relationship with you. If you're worried about what people will
think, we'll start with the two people whose opinions matter the most."

I shook my head. "Jake, my dad will kill you."

"I can handle Edward," he responded, giving me one of his sexy half smiles. "So
how about we go this weekend and tell them?"

"Are you serious?" I had to ask. "I just broke up with Nahuel."

"I've never been more serious about anything in my life. Renesmee, I want to
be with you for as long as you'll let me be in your life. If you need more time to
recover over your breakup, I'll understand. But I want you to know that this
isn't some spur of the moment decision I'm making. I've wanted to be with you
since I saw you on your twentieth birthday."
"You mean the night you had sex with Leah in my dad's study?"

"I mean the night I had sex with a substitute because I couldn't be with you.
And before you ask, no, what I feel for you isn't just about sex. My feelings for
you are so much stronger and more profound than that. They have been for
some time. Nessie, I want us to be in a relationship. I want to tell everyone that
we're together. So let's go to Seattle and tell your parents about us first. We
can even spend the rest of the weekend there. I'll take you out for dinner and
give you the kind of date you deserve."

I didn't know what to say. Jake had just admitted that he had strong feelings for
me and that he had felt this way for awhile. It was more than I ever thought
possible. It seemed as though something infinite had shifted between us. I
already knew that he was my whole world. Now I was beginning to think there
was an actual possibility that I was becoming his.

"So what do you say?" Jacob asked hopefully.

I smiled at him. "I think that sounds like a good idea."

Chapter 12 – Seth's Story

Seth's POV

"I know it's your weekend to have the kids," my ex-wife Angela hurriedly
stated. "But Ben's aunt and uncle are celebrating their fiftieth wedding
anniversary and the family is throwing them a surprise party."

I pinched the bridge of my nose tiredly. "So when will I get to see the kids
then?"

"If it's all right with you, maybe you could take them on Monday," she said.
"School starts up soon so they aren't going to have many free days in the near
future."

"All right," I replied. I guessed one day was better than nothing.

"Thanks Seth," Angela said in a relieved tone.

"Sure," I responded, trying to sound peppy. "Are they around? Can I talk to
them for a minute?"

"Err…Laura's at her friend's house right now, and Ben took Cameron to the
soccer field so Cam could get in some practice time."

Well, bully for Ben, I wanted to snap. Instead, I remarked, "Fine, give them my
love."
We said our goodbyes and I hung up the phone. I went to the window of my
office at Jacob's Garage and looked outside. I didn't want to feel jealous that
Ben was spending time with my son, but Cameron had gotten into soccer
because of me. It was kind of our thing…something to bond over the every
other weekend I saw him. And I really didn't like Ben taking that away from me,
even if he was only being a good step-dad to my son.

Feeling disappointed and out of sorts, I decided to call Jacob. Maybe we could
hang out tonight, though going by how things looked between him and
Renesmee at Collin's party a few days ago, it was pretty much a guarantee that
he'd be spending this weekend with her.

I was glad for him. I knew that might seem weird to some people considering I
was Jacob's soon to be ex-brother-in-law, but Jacob was a great guy who
deserved some happiness. From the moment I heard that Leah and Jake were
getting married, I knew it was a mistake. They weren't compatible. More
importantly, they weren't in love with one another.

I tried to tell my sister that. But Leah was always the type who wanted what
others had. If I got a toy for Christmas, she would throw a tantrum unless she
got one too.

She had a boyfriend in high school, Sam Uley. They fought all the time and
mutually decided to break up. Years later, he met and fell in love with our
cousin, Emily. Leah had absolutely no interest in Sam at that point, but as soon
as she heard that Emily and Sam were together, she had done everything she
could to win him back. She'd even shown up naked in his bed the night right
after he and Emily had formally announced their engagement. Sam had been
furious and called me to come get her.

I think that's why she pursued Jacob the way that she did. When we were
younger, she, Jake, and Bella had all run in the same circle. Jake had adored
Bella. He never looked twice at another girl. And that pissed my sister right off.
So when Leah had her chance to seduce Jacob, she took it. It was by sheer
chance that she got pregnant.

Going over to my desk, I picked up the phone to call Jacob. He answered on the
third ring.

"Hello."

"Hey Jake, it's Seth."

"Seth, how's it going? How's the office?"

"Same old, same old. Profits are up, so you know we're keeping busy. I was
actually calling to see if you wanted to hang out tonight."
"I thought you had the kids this weekend."

I grimaced, but told him, "I was supposed to, but they're playing happy family
with Ben's relatives this weekend."

I tried to pass it off lightheartedly, but the bitterness was obvious even to my
own ears.

"Sorry to hear that, Seth," Jake said sympathetically.

"It's okay," I replied. "Anyway, did you have plans?"

"Actually I do," Jacob returned. "Nessie and I are leaving for Seattle in a little
while."

I smiled at that. "So things are going good between you two?"

"I hope so," he muttered, almost to himself. "I mean, she just broke up with her
boyfriend last weekend, so we're taking things slow. The thing is, Seth…I really
care about Ness. I just get the feeling that she doesn't believe me when I tell
her I want to be in a relationship with her. That's kind of what this weekend is
all about."

"So you're going to tell her you love her this weekend?" I asked.

"I didn't say love," Jake replied quickly. "But things might be headed that way."

I rolled my eyes. Who was he seriously trying to kid? It was obvious to anyone
who ever met Jacob and Renesmee that they loved each other. I'd always
guessed that Nessie had been in love with Jake most of her life. And the way
Jake talked about her…especially the last couple of years. It didn't take a
genius to know that he worshipped her. They seemed to be the only two people
who were clueless.

"Whatever, Jake," I answered him drolly. "What's this weekend about then if
you aren't going to fess up to loving her?"

"We're going to tell Bella and Edward that we're dating."

I snorted. "Make sure you wear a bulletproof jacket. Bella will probably be cool
with it, but I can see Edward flying through the roof."

"I'm not worried about Edward," Jake replied confidently. "I'm just not sure how
Bella will take it."

"Ah…you mean because you used to boink her and now you're boinking her
daughter."

"There is no boinking going on between Ness and me," Jacob said waspishly.
"Yeah, but there will be," I assured him. And just to give him a hard time, I
added, "It's kind of creepy when you think about it."

"Was there something else you wanted?" Jake snapped causing me to chuckle.

"Nah, have fun this weekend."

"What are your plans?" he asked.

"Don't know yet. I'll probably just hang around the house and watch movies."

"Sounds kind of pathetic."

"Ouch," I replied. "We can't all have barely legal, hot physical therapy
assistants at our beck and call, you know."

"Renesmee is twenty-two," Jake replied snippily. "That's more than barely

legal."

"I don't know why you're getting so defensive," I stated innocently. I heard
Jacob huff and then he chuckled.

"Remind me again why I socialize with you?" he asked.

"Because I'm just too damned cute to ignore," I joked.

"Sure, sure," Jake snickered. "Hey listen, if you're bored, you can always come
over to the house and use the pool. Jenny will be here."

Upon hearing that news, my stomach dropped down to my feet and proceeded
to tap dance.

"Hmm…maybe I'll do that," I said as casually as I could. "Have a good trip and
give Renesmee a big, wet, sloppy kiss with tongue for me."

"I swear to God, if you were in front of me right now, I'd deck you," Jake said
with a laugh. "Talk to you later."

We disconnected the call, and I went back to my window. If I showed up at

Jake's house, there was a good chance that Jenny wouldn't even let me set a
toe inside. I sighed wearily and rested my head against the cool glass.

It wasn't easy to be around Jenny. At one time, our relationship had been as
easy as breathing. Jenny came to work for Jake shortly after he and Leah
married. I'd noticed her right away with her dark blonde hair, cool looks, and
blunt manner. She wasn't classically beautiful, but there was just something
about her that made it hard for me to look away from her. Of course, I was still
married to Angela at the time I'd met Jenny. I was a good husband though. I
never cheated, even if Jenny could tempt a saint with her vivacious curves.
My marriage to Angela had started falling apart before I met Jen. Angela and I
simply realized we didn't love each other anymore. And no matter how much
counseling we had, we just couldn't ignite the flame again. The more my
marriage began to disintegrate, the more time I spent at Leah and Jacob's.

They were both wonderful to me, even Leah. Leah wasn't a bad person; she
was just incredibly selfish and self-centered at times. But during the darkest
times of my life, she was there for me. When Angela had told me she wanted a
"trial separation," I spent even more time at my sister's. Leah had been
sympathetic and let me crash in their spare room whenever I needed to. She
and Jake never considered it an imposition, even though they were still in the
honeymoon stage of their marriage at that time. It couldn't have been easy
having me around, but neither of them complained. Maybe having me there
was a relief to them. Though Leah had been pregnant at the time with their
baby, it was obvious that their marriage wasn't a joyous one.

But while I sought out my sister and brother-in-law's company, after awhile it
was really Jenny that I'd go to see. Even when I was at my lowest, she had a
way of making me feel invincible. As months drifted into a year, I became more
and more addicted to her.

I was careful to never act inappropriately in front of my sister, especially after

she lost the baby. To Leah, image was everything. There was no way in hell
she'd ever let Jenny continue to work for her if she had a clue how fascinated I
had become with the "help." I knew Leah would've fired Jen. And I couldn't risk
that. Jenny had become too important to me.

Things finally came to a head the night my divorce became finalized. While
Angela and I had needed to go our separate ways before things got ugly
between us, the idea of not getting to see my kids every day broke my heart. I
knew they were hurting over the divorce, and that caused me more pain than
the dissolution of the marriage itself.

I'd gone to Seattle that night with every intention of getting drunk. I went to
the first random bar I could find and drank until I went numb. Too intoxicated to
drive, I'd hired a taxi and gone over to Leah and Jacob's. And that was the night
I irrevocably fucked up any chance I had with Jenny…

I tipsily trudged into the building that housed Jake and Leah's penthouse
condo.

"Good evening, Mr. Clearwater," the security guard greeted professionally.

"Hi ya," I mumbled before making my way into the elevator. Once I stumbled
inside, I heard a buzz indicating that the guard had given me clearance to go
up to the secured top floor. The elevator doors closed and I had to grab onto
the rail to avoid falling over as it shot up. It soon came to a halt and the doors
opened. I wobbled into the lobby.

"Hello," I called out. I heard light footsteps and then Jenny appeared.

"Hi," she said in surprise.

"Hey," I replied before looking around. "Leah and Jake here?"

"No, they went out. Leah went with her friends to a club," she told me in a
disapproving tone she didn't attempt to hide. "And Jacob is spending the night
at Edward and Bella's place."

"Oh…well, shit," I muttered. I took a step and almost fell on my face. Jenny
quickly came over to me and wrapped her arm around my waist. Her nose
wrinkled as she caught a whiff of me.

"You smell like a brewery," she stated disgustedly.

"I sure as hell should," I said as I leaned heavily on her. "Jen, you're looking at a
newly single man. I was out celebrating my official divorce."

How I didn't slur my speech was beyond me. Maybe I was starting to sober up.
That didn't mean I was ready to let go of Jenny though. My arm tightened on
her shoulder. She turned sympathetic eyes on me.

"I'm sorry about that," she told me.

"Are you?" I questioned, trying not to feel disappointed. It was pathetic

considering I was only just divorced, but I kind of wanted her to be happy about
my single status.

"Well, you aren't happy, are you?" she asked.

I frowned. I honestly didn't know.

"I'm going to miss seeing my kids," I admitted. "Cameron's so young, he won't

even remember a time when his parents were married. But Laura keeps asking
me why I'm not around anymore. I hate that."

"Kids are pretty resilient," Jenny told me comfortingly. "And so are you. You're
an incredibly strong person, Seth."

I glanced down at her and found her staring back at me with an expression on
her face that my alcohol-induced brain struggled to recognize. I found myself
not wanting to look away. She smiled gently back.

"Why don't I make you some coffee?" she offered.

"Sure." I nodded. "Coffee might not be a bad idea right now."

We went into the kitchen and she helped me to the table. I watched her every
move as she got the coffee brewing and started slicing up some French bread
and cheese. She carried the food over to me.

"Why don't you try to eat something," she instructed. I complied and began to
eat. After a while, the lightheadedness caused from the alcohol began to
dissipate. Jenny handed me a cup of strong coffee which I sipped gratefully.

"How'd you get here?" she asked as she took a drink from her own mug.

"Taxi," I explained as I ate some more bread.

"Well, you should probably crash here tonight," Jenny said with a thoughtful
expression. "I don't think you should be out driving."

"Yeah, probably not a good idea," I replied with a grin. At this point, I was
feeling completely sober. I still wasn't ready to go. I didn't want to leave Jen…
not in that moment. She looked at me, her eyes searching, before she glanced
at the table, a frown forming on her delicate features.

"I guess I should go make the bed." She got up and started to walk by me. I
reached up and grabbed her wrist before she could move any further.

"Don't go," I begged. Logically, I knew what I wanted to happen wasn't a good
idea. I was still feeling too raw over the divorce. But now that I was in Jenny's
company, I couldn't bear the idea of her leaving me, even if it was for a few
minutes.

"Seth…what do you expect to happen between us tonight?" she asked, blunt as

always.

"I don't know," I whispered as I stood up, towering over her. "Maybe this…"

I leaned down and brushed her mouth lightly with mine. The mere touch of her
lips set me on fire. I deepened the kiss, encircling her body in my arms. Just as
the kiss began to take on a more powerful urgency, she broke away from my
grasp.

With a shaking breath, she shook her head. "Seth, you're drunk."

"I can tell you with absolute certainty that I've never felt more sober in my
life," I told her and pulled her back to me.

She offered a token resistance, before she wrapped her arms around me. I
moved my own arms so that they were nestled against her spine. The feel of
her against me, her body curvy and so incredibly feminine, made me harden
instantly. I ended our kiss so that I could move my mouth along her jaw and
neck, sucking and tasting the skin there. My hands went to her blouse, undoing
the buttons as fast as I could. Once I removed the garment, her bra and my
shirt soon followed. We shuddered as our naked chests came together. Picking
Jenny up by the backs of her thighs, I placed her on the table and bent my
head so that I was level with her breasts. Kneading one with my hand, I teased
her other breast with my mouth, lapping and nipping at her rosy tip.

Jenny wrapped her legs around me, bringing my arousal eagerly against the
junction of her thighs. While my mouth continued to revere her womanly
curves, our lower halves began to move together, building a friction that was
magnificently painful. Needing more, my hands went to her pants at the same
time she reached for mine.

Just as my teeth scraped her nipple again, Jenny threw her head back and
moaned, "Seth…get my purse."

"What?" I asked in confusion.

"On the counter…hurry."

I reluctantly pulled away and grabbed her bag. When I turned around it was to
find that Jenny had stripped off her pants and underwear. I stopped mid-step
as I stared at her in her bare glory. I wanted to bury my face between her legs
and worship her like she deserved, but I didn't think my body could wait.
Handing her the purse, I tentatively touched between her legs, gently cupping
her heated mound with my hand.

"Oh God," Jenny moaned as she began to squirm against my questing fingers.
Biting her lip, she reached inside her bag and pulled out a condom.

"You keep these in stock?" I asked, half-jokingly.

"You never can be too careful nowadays," she replied, but didn't look ashamed.
I smiled as I took the condom from her and pushed my jeans out of the way
along with my boxers.

"Are you ready?" I questioned as I moved between her thighs.

"Yes," she said breathlessly, shifting to a better position on the table,

spreading her legs welcomingly.

Rolling the rubber on, I placed myself at her entrance and pushed in slowly. I
didn't hurry. I wanted to prolong the experience for as long as I could. Jenny,
however, had other ideas. She wrapped her legs tightly around my back. With
one hand gripping the table, she reached between us and began to fondle my
exposed hardness. Feeling her hand on me sent me over the edge. I began to
pound into her, right on Jacob and Leah's kitchen table. It didn't take long
before we both went toppling over the edge. When I finally stopped
shuddering, I slowly pulled away.

"I love you, Seth," she murmured tiredly. "I have for a long time now."

I froze…and then I did the unthinkable. With my divorce and my kids'

heartache suddenly foremost in my mind, I said, "This was sex, Jen. Very
enjoyable sex, but nothing more than that. I'm not looking for anything else.
Certainly not with you."

Jenny went from looking happy to horrified in the space of a few seconds. With
a sob, she grabbed her clothes and ran out of the room.

Of course, it was only after Jenny left that I realized how much I'd messed up. I
had run after her, but it was too late. She wouldn't talk to me, and when
morning came, Leah was home and I wasn't able to get any alone time with
Jenny.

Instead of trying for a relationship with her, I took some time to heal from my
divorce. The first year after my marriage ended, I lived like a hermit, only going
out to eat and work. The year after that, I went on a binge of sexual
exploration. I slept with as many women as I could. Not one single experience
was one-tenth of what I'd experienced with Jen. It was after I had slept with one
of those faceless women that something dawned on me. I never got much
satisfaction, because there was only one woman I wanted.

I wanted Jenny. Once I realized that, I pursued her with everything I had in me.
But by then, she didn't want anything to do with me. She'd heard gossip about
me. I had developed a reputation as a womanizer. She had even told me one
time when I asked her to give me a second chance that I had become someone
she couldn't respect. I never touched another woman after that conversation. I
watched the occasional porn movie to get some release, but that was it.

I'd been so hopeful when she came to La Push to help Jacob. She had gotten
good at avoiding me over the past few years. But I thought when she came to
live on the rez that it was a sign she was finally willing to give me another shot.
What a joke that turned out to be. On the days she had off, she went out with
friends or family. Once I went into Forks and even caught her on a date when
some random local. I went home and hit my punching bag for an hour after I
saw that. It truly sucked ass to realize you were in love with someone who
couldn't stand the sight of you.

Pulling my thoughts from the past, I went back to my desk and worked,
keeping an impatient eye on the clock on my desk. When it was almost five
o'clock, I decided to leave for the day. Hitting the drive-thru at the local fast
food restaurant, I went home and ate a hasty meal. Around six, I decided that I
was restless and needed to go for a swim. Grabbing my swim trunks, I got in
my car and headed towards La Push. The closer I got to Jake's house, the more
nervous I became.

What would Jenny say when I got there? I had tried asking her out a few weeks
ago, but she had rejected me. The damn woman was the most stubborn
creature ever to be put on the planet. That still didn't mean I was willing to give
up.

Pulling into Jake's driveway, I put the car into park, and then cupped my hand
over my mouth for a quick breath check. Deciding that I smelled okay, I got out
of the vehicle and made my way to the front door, giving it a tentative knock.
Jenny answered minutes later.

"Jacob's not here," she said immediately, looking at me wearily.

"I know that," I replied as casually as I could, my stomach twisting with tension.

"Then why are you here?"

"Jake said I could use his pool," I explained.

"Hmph," was her only response. She stepped back and let me in. I silently
sighed with relief.

I followed closely behind. When she suddenly stopped, I ran into her. She would
have fallen, but I grabbed her by the waist and pulled her to me so that her
back was against my chest.

"Sorry about that," I said close to her ear, not letting her go.

"That's okay," she said, her hand going to mine where she tugged my fingers
off her body. "The pool is that way."

She pointed in the direction down the hall and went into the kitchen.

"You want to join me?" I asked with a wiggle of my eyebrows.

She glared at me. "I'm not here to entertain you. I'm here to work."

"Ah, but the boss isn't here," I reminded her. "Come on, Jen."

"No," she said firmly before she went back to whatever she was doing. It looked
like she was making a pie. I tried not to get frustrated as she effectively shut
me out, but I finally snapped, her indifference making me lose my temper.

"Why did you come to La Push if it wasn't for me?"

"Excuse me?" she asked in disbelief.

"For years, you've avoided getting anywhere near me since the night we slept
together. And now you transfer to a job that's only thirty minutes from where I
live?"

Jenny stiffened…a really bad sign that I just pushed her past her tolerance
level. She came over to me angrily, poking me hard in the chest.

"First off, a quick lay on the kitchen table does not constitute as 'sleeping'
together. Secondly, I know this might be too much for your big, fat, oversexed
ego to comprehend, but did you ever think that perhaps I came to La Push,
because my boss was paralyzed in an accident? And that maybe…and I know
this is really crazy…but maybe I thought Jacob might need my help."

Her face was red at this point, her breasts heaving in her indignation. I wanted
to grab her, throw her onto the kitchen island, and finish what we started all
those years ago. I tried very hard to keep my face passive.

"You know, you're beautiful when you're pissed," I told her.

"Fuck off, Seth," she replied before turning away from me.

Okay, so not the great start I was looking for. Still, I guessed it was a good sign
that I could get under her skin so easily. That must mean that she wasn't as
indifferent to me as she pretended.

I tried again. "Look, I'm sorry. I'm sorry for what I just said. I know you didn't
come to La Push for me. You've got too big of a heart to not help Jacob when
he needed you the most. And I'm sorry for hurting you that night—"

"You've apologized before for that," Jenny reminded me with a bittersweet

smile. "And as I told you before, it's in the past."

I moved so that I was next to her. "Jen, I don't want it to be in the past. I was in
a bad place that night, but I've changed since then—"

"Sure you've changed," she interrupted again. "You went from being married to
sleeping with half the state of Washington."

I tried to reach out to her but she moved away. Frustrated, I grabbed her arm
and turned her so that she had to look at me.

"Okay…I fucked up. I get that. I didn't handle my divorce well. I was messed up
and you got caught in the middle of that. I pushed you away and…"

I let her go and walked away. Jenny followed me.

"What?" she asked when I didn't continue.

I ran a hand through my hair before I confessed in a ragged tone, "I didn't want
to care for you, okay? I didn't want to care for anyone after my marriage failed.
I pushed you away because I knew you'd be too important to me. Hell, you
were already too important and I wasn't ready for that. So I slept with a bunch
of women to try to forget you. Not Angela…you!"

I turned and faced her. "You remember four years ago, when you said I was a
womanizer and you couldn't respect what I had become? I haven't touched a
woman since then."

"Seth…"

I saw the indecisiveness on her face. I knew she was weakening. I pressed my
advantage.

"Look, why don't you and I just hang out tonight. No pressure and if you still
want to kick me in the face by the time I leave, then I'll never bother you again.
Can we do that at least?"

She looked at me with a frown before looking back at the kitchen counter.
Waving at it, she said nonchalantly, "I'm baking a pie."

"I'm really good at cutting up fruit," I promised. She smiled a little at that and I
felt my heart soar.

"The apples are in the fridge," she said. Grinning, I grabbed the fruit out of the
refrigerator and began to peel the amount Jenny told me she needed.

"So what do you think about Renesmee and Jacob dating?" I asked.

"I'd say it's about time," Jenny said, looking at me over her shoulder.

"Yeah," I agreed. "I think it's well past time."

She looked at me for a moment, her eyes silently acknowledging that my

comment wasn't about Jake and Ness. We continued to talk for the next few
hours. Jenny relaxed the more we chatted, our conversation as easy as it was
years ago. Finally around midnight, I decided to leave.

"I had fun," I told her in a hopeful tone as I made my way to the front door.

"Yeah, me too," Jenny said. "Good night."

"Good night," I responded in a disappointed tone. If I was looking for a sign that
she had forgiven me, I didn't get it. I was halfway down the walkway when I
heard her call my name.

"Seth."
"Yeah?" I asked as I turned to look at her.

She shifted nervously before saying, "Jake and Ness are going to be gone all
weekend. If you're not doing anything tomorrow, why don't you come back and
try a piece of that pie."

I felt my face light up.

"I'd like that."

Chapter 13 – Edward's Warning

Jacob's POV

Ness and I decided to fly to Seattle to see Bella and Edward instead of driving
the five hours it would've normally taken us to get there. Our plane landed at
Sea-Tac Airport. We left the busy terminal and found the car I had rented
waiting for us outside. A car company employee handed me the keys and
discreetly left us alone. The car had been equipped with all the gear I needed
to be able to drive it. Now that I had the ability to operate a vehicle, it was a
privilege I didn't easily give up.

To get to Ness's family home, we were going to have to backtrack and head
west. We decided to take the ferry from Seattle to Bremerton, which was where
Edward, Bella, and Oliver lived. As we got on the ferry, we found a bench on
the outside deck to sit on. Pulling myself out of my wheelchair, I sat down on
the cold seat. Ness cuddled into my side as the cool sea air began to whip
around us as the ship set into motion. I kissed her temple before wrapping an
arm around her. We sat that way for the next forty-five minutes, chatting
inanely.

"What are you thinking about?" I asked when she went quiet for too long. I
watched her ever expressive face pull into a frown.

She linked her fingers with mine. "I was just wondering how my parents are
going to take the news of us dating."

"It'll be fine," I assured her. And if it wasn't, tough shit.

I hoped for Nessie's sake that Edward wouldn't be as close minded as Brady
had been. But if he was, that was too bad. I was going to continue my
relationship with Ness. But I knew things would be easier on Nessie if Edward
accepted us.

I thought back to a conversation I'd had with Seth earlier in the day. He had
asked if I was going to fess up this weekend to loving Renesmee. It was a
conversation I couldn't stop thinking about.
I looked at her now…at the sheer perfection of her profile and felt my heart jolt.
The fact of the matter was that I was in love with Renesmee. It was no longer a
matter of thinking that I was possibly falling in love with her. I was head over
heels, completely and permanently in love this woman. I couldn't even imagine
my life without her.

I rubbed my chin against her soft hair. The words were right on the tip of my
tongue. What would she say if I told her how I felt? Would she say it was too
soon? My stomach twisted at that thought.

Then again, she might say that she loved me back.

Please love me back.

"Hey Ness," I started to say, my stomach twisting with nerves. She lifted her
head and looked at me. I lost my train of thought as I stared into her warm
chocolate colored eyes.

"Hmm?"

"I…" And then I lost my nerve. I broke my gaze away from hers and looked out
at the water. "Nothing. I just wanted to say that everything will be all right this
weekend."

"You don't think the shock of us dating will give my dad a heart attack then?"
she half joked.

I chuckled a little. "It might make his head explode, but I'm pretty sure his
heart will be fine."

"We're doing the right thing though, right?" Renesmee bit her lip worriedly.

I felt a pang of panic. "You're not having any regrets, are you?"

"About you?"

"Yeah."

She smiled at me then, and it filled me with so much hope and strength, I felt
like I could have gotten out of my wheelchair and walked…if that were
possible.

"If there's one thing I'm positive about, it's that I want to be with you," she said
firmly. To my relief, I didn't see a speck of doubt on her face. She continued,
"I'm just not sure if we should be open about it with everyone yet."

"That's why we need to tell people," I insisted. "The quicker people know about
us, the easier it will be in the long run."
Renesmee nodded before smiling at me. She leaned forward and pressed her
open lips to mine. I wanted to explore the recesses of her mouth with my
tongue, but an announcement came over the ferry's loudspeaker that we were
about to reach land. Pulling back regretfully, I grabbed my wheelchair next to
me and maneuvered myself into it.

Once we docked, we were able to get into our rented car. We drove off the
ferry and headed to Edward and Bella's house. As soon as we pulled into the
driveway, Renesmee's brother, Oliver, came running out of the house. I put the
car in park and watched with amusement as Ness scrambled out of the car and
caught her baby brother, lifting him off the ground. She swung him around a
few times before placing him back down.

"I missed you, Nessie," he told her, giving her waist a hug.

Renesmee cradled her brother to her. "I missed you too, Ollie."

"So why can't I eat dinner with you tonight?" Oliver asked petulantly.

"Because Jacob and I need to have a grownup conversation with Mom and
Dad," Ness explained gently.

"But I never get to see you," Ollie complained. I had pulled myself into my
wheelchair at this point and headed over to them.

"Sorry, squirt," I told him. "Adults only this time."

"Hey Uncle Jacob," Oliver said, giving me a hug.

"Hi ya, kid. Jeez, you've gotten big," I remarked.

Ollie grinned at me, revealing a missing tooth in the front of his mouth, though
I could see the other growing in.

"Yep," he said proudly. "I'm the tallest in my class."

"Very cool," I said, ruffling his hair. I rolled us into Bella and Edward's house.
Someone had thoughtfully organized a ramp to be put out front so that I would
have easy access to the home.

As we entered the hall, Bella came hurriedly towards us. She gave me a brief
hug, before embracing her daughter.

"You two get into a fight?" she asked, eyeing the light bruises on our faces from
my fight with Nahuel and from where I elbowed Ness in the face.

"It's a long story," Ness said. "But no, we weren't fighting each other if that's
what you were wondering."
"And what exactly is your excuse for not coming to see me more often?" Bella
reprimanded, giving Ness's hair a gentle tug. "My only daughter and I never get
to spend anytime with you."

Ness gave her mother a chagrined smile. "Sorry Mom."

"It's okay," Bella replied. "I blame this one here."

She nodded at me. I feigned a hurtful expression. "What'd I do?"

"You treat my daughter like an indentured servant. The girl never gets to see
her poor, aging, decrepit mother."

Renesmee gave a delicate snort. "You're hardly decrepit."

Bella gave her a mock glare before stepping back. "Well, come in and stay
awhile. You are planning on spending the night here, correct?"

"Oh," I said, startled. I was really hoping for some privacy with Ness tonight.
"We were actually thinking of taking the late ferry back to Seattle tonight."

"Forget that." Bella dismissed any notion of the idea. "I've already made up the
beds in the spare rooms. You've got to stay with us."

Bella gave me a look that I recognized immediately. It was her, I'm more
stubborn than you and you might as well do what I say because I'm not taking
no for an answer, look.

"Fine," I muttered. "We'll stay here tonight."

"Good," Bella said in complete satisfaction. "Edward should be home in a

couple of hours. Everything has been arranged so that we can have the private
dinner you requested, Ness."

"Thanks," Renesmee replied. She seemed less animated since I agreed to

spend the night here. "Oliver, do you want to help me get the bags?"

I watched as Ness and Oliver went back out the front door to get our suitcases.
I turned to find Bella giving me an appraising look.

"What really happened to cause those bruises?"

"Nahuel showed up at the house," I explained. "Ness broke up with him, and he
punched me in the face for some reason."

"Oh…so he just randomly punched you," Bella remarked, raising an eyebrow at

me.

"Yeah," I told her innocently.

"Right…so what's the real story? Did he have reason to punch you or not?"

"Maybe a little one," I finally admitted sheepishly.

"And is his reason actually why you're really here this weekend."

Dammit! Sometimes Bella was too smart for her own good.

"Possibly," I replied vaguely.

"I see," she said with a look of satisfied amusement.

I looked at her closely. Why did I get the feeling that she saw a lot more than I
gave her credit for? I suddenly felt reassured that Bella would be okay with
what Ness and I were going to tell her and Edward later. A sense of rightfulness
washed over me. The past was truly the past. At this time last year, I had
thought of nothing but the woman in front of me. Now, I knew that life was
always trying to point me in a different direction. It was trying to point me to
Renesmee.

Ness came in at that moment, carrying our two suitcases. Oliver was tagging
behind her with Ness's small carry-on bag that was filled with God knew what.

"Where should I put these?" Renesmee asked, nodding at the bags.

"I put Jacob in the guest room on the main floor. Your old room is made up as
well," Bella said to which Ness rolled her eyes.

"Great," she mumbled. "Nothing like sleeping on a pink canopy bed."

I grinned at that. Ness had once told me when she was younger that her
Grandma Renee had bought her a bed which included a pink ruffled canopy.
She hated the bed, but never said anything about it because she didn't want to
hurt her grandmother's feelings.

"It's just for one night," I reminded her indulgently.

"Sure, sure," she muttered as she handed me my suitcase before heading up to

her room with Oliver still following her.

"Do you want me to take that for you?" Bella asked, already reaching for the
case.

"That's okay," I told her. "I've got it."

I carefully balanced my bag on my lap, before rolling myself down the hall to
the spare room I had used on numerous occasions. I put the suitcase in the
room and went back down the hall, going into the living room. Bella and I were
catching up when Oliver and Renesmee reappeared. We sat around talking
until Edward came home. Bella then got Oliver's dinner ready with Ness's help,
while Edward and I conversed amicably.

When Oliver was fed and sent to bed, Renesmee set out the dinner plates in
the dining room while Bella put our meal on the table. My stomach growled
appreciatively as I saw she had fixed one of my favorite dishes, beef stew.

With homemade biscuits and red wine served with our dinner, we were really
enjoying ourselves until Edward said, "So Nessie, how are things going with you
and Nahuel?"

Renesmee took a deep breath before saying, "We broke up."

"Is that why you have that bruise on your face?" Edward asked, examining his
daughter before glancing at my discolored flesh.

"Err…kind of," Ness said, looking to me for help.

"The short story is…" I began. "He punched me, I tackled him, Ness tried to
break us up, and I hit her in the face with my elbow when I was pulling back my
arm to deck Nahuel."

Edward's face seemed to turn an angry shade of red while I spoke. A vein
began to stand out on his forehead.

"And why would he punch you?" he asked in a grated tone.

"Because Renesmee and I had just returned from a date," I stated

unabashedly.

Edward sucked in a furious breath. Bella looked like the cat that swallowed the
canary. She was grinning from ear to ear, which made me smile in return. It
was like we were back in high school again; both in on a great secret.

"You two are dating?" Edward asked menacingly.

"Yes, Dad, we are," Ness answered, raising her chin defiantly.

He nodded slowly and for a minute I began to relax. Maybe he was going to
accept us. That optimism lasted until Edward slammed his hand angrily against
the table. The noise echoed loudly in the room, causing us to jerk in our seats.
Edward stood up quickly, the chair toppling behind him.

With a shaking hand, he pointed at Ness. "Go to your room."

"What?" she asked in shock.

"You heard me," Edward shouted before looking at me. "And you…you sick
perverted fuck. How dare you—you of all people—touch my daughter!"
"Edward, I love her," I told him quietly, causing a hush to fall over the room.

My eyes flew to Ness's. Everyone else faded away as we looked at each other.
This wasn't exactly the way I wanted to tell her, but now that the truth was
finally out there, I didn't have any regrets. I was nervous to see her reaction
though. Her eyes glistened with sudden tears before a tremulous smile lit her
face. I felt something warm erupt inside me, evaporating any pain and worry I'd
been feeling since the accident until I was left with nothing but a contented
peace.

So this was what it was like to really be in love with someone…to know it and
acknowledge it.

"Bella, will you take Ness out of the room? I'd like to speak to Jacob privately,"
Edward said in an even tone.

I was startled back to awareness by the sound of his voice. I quickly looked at
Bella. She gave me a sympathetic smile before standing up.

"Ness, why don't we give these two a moment alone," Bella suggested.

"Whatever Dad has to say to Jacob, he can say in front of me," Renesmee said
stubbornly. I felt myself smirk. Nessie was already presenting a united front. I
really liked that idea more than I should.

"No, I really can't say what I have to in front of you," Edward remarked, giving
me a warning look that made me instantly uneasy.

"Ness," I stated. "Give us a moment, okay?"

"But—"

"Please," I pleaded.

"Fine," she snapped. She stood up and left the room. Bella came over and
squeezed my shoulder in understanding before she left as well. When we heard
the women head up the stairs, Edward finally spoke.

"I only have one question for you," he said angrily. When I nodded, he asked,
"Does Renesmee know of your previous relationship with Bella?"

"Does she know that we've been friends for years?" I questioned flippantly.

"Don't play stupid, though right now you're excelling at it," Edward replied
bitterly.

"No," I finally said with a sigh. "She doesn't know that Bella and I once dated."
"And you don't think my daughter has a right to know that her boyfriend once
slept with her mother?"

"The past is the past," I responded weakly.

"How can you have a relationship with Renesmee when you aren't being honest
with her?"

"I plan on telling her…everything."

"When?"

"When the time is right," I answered impatiently.

"You tell my daughter the truth—all of it—or I will," Edward promised.

I blew up then. "Renesmee isn't a little girl anymore. She doesn't need you to
protect her."

"She'll always be my little girl, Jacob. And the fact that you're withholding
information from her doesn't sit well with me. For example, my daughter
doesn't know that you slept with Bella. Or that you only married Leah because
you couldn't have my wife. She doesn't know that you've been in love with
Bella for a majority of your life."

I must have looked startled because Edward gave me a cold look.

"Yes, I've known how you felt about Bella. I've known for years that you've
been in love with her. I never brought it up before because I thought you were
an honorable man. I knew you wouldn't try anything. Clearly, I was wrong
about you though if you decide to keep this information to yourself. Do you
honestly think that Ness won't be bothered that you withheld something this
important from her?"

I felt my stomach twist painfully. Could I lose Ness over the past when I only
just found her?

"I'll tell her. I promise you that, Edward."

He looked at me and nodded. "Good. Now that that's settled…what exactly are
your intentions towards my daughter?"

I smiled at that. Now he was sounding more like a traditional father.

"Well, dating is a definite. Eventual marriage if she'll have me. And children."

My heart ached at the idea. What I wouldn't give to hold my child. It would be
amazing to see a miniature little Renesmee walking around with her bronze
curls and my attitude. Or maybe we would have a little boy with my sense of
humor and Ness's spirit.

"Grandpa Edward," Edward muttered to himself. He frowned for a minute

before a small half smile broke out on his features. "Yeah, I guess that'd be all
right."

I looked at him in bemusement. "So you're okay with this?"

He eyed me before shrugging. "My daughter could do worse. Though I think

Nahuel is much better for her, as long as you provide for her and keep her
happy, then what more could a father ask for?"

I went around the table and stuck out my hand for him to shake. Edward
leaned down and gave me a brief hug instead.

"You're a good friend," I told him as I hugged him back.

"I've got to be to put up with this shit." He stepped back from me and grinned.
"But just so you know…if you hurt my daughter, I'll make that shiner Nahuel
gave you look like nothing at all."

"Got it," I said, smiling back. He shook his head.

"You and Ness," he remarked before dramatically shuddering. "Yeah, that's

going to take some getting used to."

I nodded for his benefit, but I already knew that Ness and I made sense. Things
might just work out after all. I just had to tell Renesmee about my past, and
then I'd know where things stood.

Later on that night, I was lying in the spare room staring up at the ceiling as I
thought about the events of the day. Edward wasn't exactly approving of my
relationship with his daughter, but at least he was accepting. As for Bella, she
had come up to me after Edward and I'd talked and had given me a hug.

She had whispered into my ear, "I knew it. From the moment I walked in on you
two when you were in the hospital, I knew that this was probably going to
happen. Love her well, Jacob…love her like she deserves."

A quiet knock on the door pulled me from my thoughts. The door cracked open,
and I saw Renesmee poke her head in.

"Are you a sleep?" she whispered loudly, causing me to chuckle.

"Even if I was, that would have woken me," I told her.

"Can I come in?" she asked hesitantly.

"Sure," I said. I looked at the bedside clock and saw that it was a little after 1
AM. "Can't you sleep?"

"I had some things on my mind," she explained. She made her way across the
moonlit room and sat down on the edge of the bed. I noticed she was wearing a
thin tank top and shorts.

"Want to tell me about it?" I asked, holding out my one arm. She immediately
laid down next to me, curling into my side. I held her against me as she
wrapped her arm around my waist.

"Did you mean what you said at the dinner table?" Renesmee asked with her
chin on my chest as she looked at me.

"Which part?"

"About loving me."

"Yes, I did," I told her. "Ness, spending these last couple of months together
has opened my eyes. I love you…I've been in love with you since your
twentieth birthday. The fact that you completely dropped me and wouldn't
have anything to do with me after your party killed me more than ending my
marriage did. I love you, Nessie."

A tear spilled down her cheek. I reached up and traced its path with my thumb.

"I love you, too, Jake. I have since I was a little girl. It's never stopped, no
matter how hard I tried to forget you and move on with my life."

"Thank God," I muttered before I pulled her to me. I crushed her lips with mine,
devouring her sweet softness. She moved so that she was more fully over me,
straddling my thighs with her legs. I pulled back slightly and moved my mouth
so that I could nibble her earlobe with my mouth.

"Ness," I whispered.

"Mmhmm?"

"I want to take you tomorrow to a condo I'm thinking of buying in Seattle. If you
like it, maybe we could…uh…you know…move in together. It's not that far
away from your school."

It was something I had been thinking about a lot lately. After living this summer
with Ness in my house, I couldn't bear to go without seeing her on a daily basis.
The very idea sent me into a blind panic.

She pulled back and looked down at me. "Are you serious?"

"If it's too soon and you don't want to, I understa—"
Her mouth stopped my words, as she reclaimed my lips with hers.

Whispering against my mouth, she said, "Yes, I want that. Very much."

I reached up and grasped the back of her head, holding her to me as our lips
resumed their play with each other. My body began to ache for her, but with
what little restraint I had, I finally pulled away.

"What is it?" Renesmee asked in confusion. "What's wrong?"

"I can't do this," I confessed on a shaky breath.

"Can't do what?"

"Ness," I said with a slight laugh. "If we continue doing this, I'm going to end up
seducing you."

She giggled at that. "Maybe I want to be seduced."

I shook my head. "Your father is just getting used to the idea. I don't want to
push him any further by having sex under his roof."

Renesmee sighed and climbed off me. "Spoil sport."

"After we leave here though, it's open season," I said, my voice deepening
lustfully.

"Promise."

"I guarantee it."

I saw her smile before she leaned down and kissed me lightly. "I guess I should
let you sleep then. Tomorrow is a brand new day for us."

"Is it at that," I told her with a smirk.

She climbed off the bed and headed for the door. I watched her hips sway
seductively as she went. When she got within the doorframe, she turned back
to face me.

"Good night, Jacob."

"Night, baby."

She smiled and went out the door. The next morning we were still all smiles as
we bid goodbye to Bella, Edward, and Oliver. There was a new tension in the air
between Renesmee and myself as we drove away. There was a sexual need
that lay just underneath the surface. Any minute I expected it to explode.
We made our way back to Seattle and headed north of downtown. I had a
difficult time concentrating on the road. Ness was utterly captivating in a pink
strapless summer dress. It hugged her chest and flared out at the waist, the
bottom hem resting just at Nessie's knees. Even though Ness had bronze
colored hair, she loved wearing pink. And it complimented her. It was ultra
feminine, yet screamed at me to touch her. It didn't help that Renesmee kept
parting her legs only to close them again teasingly.

I drove the car to the condominium complex my realtor had told me about with
what little focus I had left. Going into the building, I was happy to see that
everything was wheelchair accessible. I rolled my chair over to the desk.

"May I help you?" a professional looking woman said behind the front desk.

"I'm here to see the penthouse that's for sale. My realtor made the
appointment for me. My name is Jacob Black."

"Of course, Mr. Black," she said, reaching inside a drawer beneath her desk and
pulling out a plastic card. "Here is the keycard you'll need to get to the top
floor. If you have any questions or would like to consult with the building
manager, please let us know."

"Thanks," I said. She pointed me in the direction of the elevator, and Renesmee
and I entered it. I inserted the keycard into the designated spot and the doors
closed in front of us.

"Don't we need someone to show us around?" Ness wondered.

I chuckled. "Not at this price point."

The doors opened onto a large entry room. The walls were made of warm oak;
the floors a dark marble. Directly in front of us was a hallway entrance. On
either side of it were two shelves embedded in the walls. Statues sat on each
shelf, spotlighted by recessed lighting above them.

"Were they going for the Greek revival look?" Renesmee joked as she eyed the
white marbled statues.

I snorted. "Let's hope the rest of the penthouse isn't like this."

To the left of the entryway was a room, which was obviously designated for any
help that might be living there. To the right was a closet. We walked down the
short hallway straight in front of us. To my relief it opened onto an open living
room. Floor to ceiling windows made up the walls, providing a panoramic view
of the Seattle skyline. In the distance I could see Elliott Bay and Mount Rainer.

"Wow," Ness said breathlessly.

"Not bad," I agreed.

One wall had a glass door that opened out onto a large deck that seemed to
span the entire length of the room. We turned and headed right and found a
dining room and kitchen. A little further we found an office, guest room, large
bathroom, and then the master suite.

"I guess I could take the guest room and you could have this room," I said
reluctantly as I looked around the spacious space.

Ness's face whipped to mine. "Or we could just share this one."

"Is that what you want?" I asked cautiously, careful to not get my hopes up.

"Isn't that why you asked me to move in with you?"

"Nessie," I said, rolling over to her and picking up her hand so that I could kiss
her palm. "I don't want you to feel pressured or anything. We can take this slow
—"

"Jacob," she answered, covering my mouth with her hand. "I've been waiting
for you my entire life. I'm done with taking things slow."

I held her wrist so that she couldn't pull away. I licked the center of her hand,
tasting her smooth skin. Her pupils dilated in reaction. Letting her go with a
smug smile, we continued to explore the room. There was a large closest which
could have passed for a bedroom all by itself. There was also a gigantic master
bathroom with a Jacuzzi tub, separate shower, and built-in vanity.

"That'll be good for you," Ness said, looking at the vanity. "You'll be able to get
your chair under there so you can get ready in the morning."

"Yes, it's the perfect place to make myself beautiful," I joked, patting my face.

Ness rolled her eyes at me. Leaving the room, I heard her call out, "Where does
this door lead to?"

I followed her voice and found her standing by a door that discreetly blended in
with the wall.

"I don't know," I said with a shrug. "Open it and find out."

"I hope this isn't the fire escape," Ness said with a giggle. "Wouldn't that be
embarrassing if we set off any alarms?"

"They probably wouldn't want us moving in here, that's for sure," I said with a
snort.
Biting her lip nervously, she turned the handle and opened the door. Sunlight
filled the doorframe. I heard Ness gasp and I hurried over to her.

I rolled outside and stopped. We were on a private patio. Or at least I thought it

was a patio. On either side of me were large hedges. There was a lattice
wooden roof that had vines with blossoming flowers growing all over it. At the
end were large potted plants that overlooked more of the Seattle skyline. The
floor was covered in actual grass. It was like stepping into an urban garden.
The patio offered seclusion and escape.

"Okay, if this doesn't sell you on this place, I don't know what will," Ness
muttered.

"I agree," I said. "This place is perfect for us."

I went over and pulled her on my lap.

"We could get some nice patio furniture," Ness said, already planning
everything. "I could study out here when the weather is nice. You can come
here and relax after a hard day of work."

"That's not all we can do out here," I whispered. I moved Ness's hair off her
neck and began to kiss the skin there. Ness slid back until her gently round
bottom was resting firmly in my lap.

"Mmhmm, very true," she said as my arms wrapped around her, holding her
firmly against me.

My one hand drifted to her breast. I molded it with my hand as I began to

lightly suck on the throbbing vein in her neck. My other hand went to her
stomach where I spanned out my hand; the pinky touching the top of her pubic
bone. I began to do circles against her tummy area. Ness spread her legs so
that they were on either side of mine. My hand became bolder. I used just my
fingertips on her, creating smaller circles as I headed lower, my nails moving
across her femininity.

Ness began to squirm against me, causing me to harden. I slipped my other

hand inside the top of her dress. To my relief, she wasn't wearing an interfering
bra. I cupped her bare breast, taking her pebbled nipple between my index and
middle finger and pulling on it. Ness arched her back.

Feeling impatient, I pushed the top part of her dress down, exposing both of
her curves. I went back to administering my attention there, while my other
hand pushed Ness's skirt up until there was nothing but her panties in my way.
Even those weren't a barrier for long.
I reached the top of them and let my hand sink underneath. My fingers slipped
past her downy curls until I was at the very center of her. I began to rub her
bud up and down.

"Jacob," Ness moaned, throwing her head back against my shoulder.

I kept my one hand active, continuing to knead her breasts, while I moved the
thumb of my other hand to her nub. While that played with her, I moved my
fingers to her wet folds. I encircled them several times before dipping below.

One finger entered her slowly. I rocked it back and forth a few times before
slowly allowing another finger to join in the fun. I explored her heated haven,
touching different spots, listening to Ness's breathing to detect which areas
had the biggest effect on her. When her breath hitched, I touched the spot
again. Renesmee's hands grabbed onto the armrests of my wheelchair.

"Right there, Jacob," she pleaded as she began to bounce up and down on my
hand. I continued to pleasure her, until I felt her clench around my fingers and
her wetness increase.

"Oh God," she cried out before slumping against me.

"How was that?" I teased.

"There are…" she began breathlessly, "no words."

My phone began to ring in my pant pocket. Ness scrabbled off my lap,

stumbling a bit in her dazed state.

I answered it and barked, "Jacob Black."

"Jacob, this is Peter," my realtor stated. "How it'd go at the condo?"

"I'll take it," I told him.

"Another bid came in just this morning," Peter explained. I was only half paying
attention to him because Ness had just reached behind her and unzipped her
dress. She was soon standing in nothing but a pink thong. I groaned.

"Jacob? Are you there?" Peter questioned worriedly.

"I'm here," I responded gruffly. "I want this place, Peter. Make it happen. Offer
ten percent more than whatever the highest bid is."

"You've got it," Peter replied. I hung up and shoved the phone back inside my
pant pocket.

"What are you doing?" I asked distractedly as Ness came slowly over to me.
She bent down so that she was kneeling in front of me.
"You didn't think that was it, did you?" she stated. Reaching for the fastening of
my pants, she undid it before carefully pulling the zipper down. Next, she
reached to the side of my wheelchair and put the brake on. She bent down and
removed my feet from the footrests attached to my chair.

"Lift up," she ordered. I grabbed my armrests and raised myself off the seat of
the chair. Ness pulled my pants and briefs down until they were around my
knees.

"Nessie, are you sure about this?" I wondered hopefully.

Instead of responding, she bent her head and licked my shaft from base to tip.
She then sucked lightly on the head. My chest and arms shook in response. I
wanted to move more, but the lower half of my body remained dead.

"Did you enjoy the feel of my mouth on you?" Ness questioned almost
clinically.

"Yes," I groaned, half in pleasure, half in frustration. "I wish I could react…I wish
I could be normal for you."

She frowned at that. "You are normal, Jacob. You feel this, don't you?"

She gripped my sensitized sack with her hand.

"Yes," I gritted out.

"And I already know that you feel this." She ran her hand up and down my
erection. My eyes closed as hot desire raced over me.

Suddenly, I felt her breath on my cheek. I opened my eyes to find her face
inches from me.

"I think you're very normal, Jacob," she assured me, before pressing her lips to
mine. I grabbed the back of her head and held her to me as my tongue traced
her mouth before plunging inside. Our tongues tangoed together; my body
trembling in need. Ness finally broke away.

"Scoot up," she instructed. I did as I was told. She was after all the physical
therapy assistant and I merely the patient. Looking at me, she hooked her
thumbs in her thong underwear and slid it down. She stepped out of it before
looking hesitantly at me.

"You're beautiful," I told her. "Come here."

I held out my hand and she took it. I pulled her to me, but before she could sit
down, I turned her so that she was facing away from me.
"Straddle my lap," I said in complete command. She looked over at me, her
eyes kindling with passion.

Renesmee did as I asked. She moved her legs so that they were on either side
of me. She slowly lowered herself on me. I positioned myself so that my tip met
her simmering entrance.

"Now, baby," I said and Ness pushed down until I was buried inside her. We
paused for a minute, adjusting to each other. It took every ounce of control not
to explode inside her. It felt like I was being wrapped inside molten silk.

My one hand went to her waist while the other returned to the bud between her
thighs. I toyed with her as she began to move against me. Her one hand
gripped the armrest of my chair while her other clasped the hair on the back of
my head. We moved together, my hand at her waist guiding us into an even
pace that soon spun out of control.

"Jacob, I'm coming," she shouted just as her insides pulsated around me. I
moved both of my hands to her hips and moved her up and down several more
times until I also convulsed, releasing myself inside her as I groaned out in
jarring satisfaction.

I let go of Ness's waist, hoping that I didn't bruise her. She collapsed against
me as we both tried to catch our breath.

"Don't ever…" she panted. "Don't ever doubt you're a man again. Wow."

I chuckled as I felt my masculine pride—something that had been badly bruised

since the accident—shoot through the roof.

"Are you saying it was good?" I had to double check.

"It was…wow," she repeated and I laughed, wrapping my arms around her and
holding her against me.

"I love you more than life itself, Renesmee Cullen," I whispered tenderly in her
ear.

"I love you," she responded, turning her head so that we could kiss, even at the
awkward angle. My phone rang in my pocket.

Groaning, we broke apart. Ness carefully slid off of me while I reached for my
phone that was still in the bundled pants around my ankles.

Answering it, I asked rudely, "What?"

"Jacob?" Peter said hesitantly.

"Sorry," I said as Ness began to pick up her clothes. She mouthed "bathroom"
and I nodded.

"I just wanted to let you know that the sell went through. The place is yours. I
just need you to stop by my office and sign some paperwork."

"Fine, give me an hour," I told him and disconnected the call.

After getting dressed, Ness and I left the condo and headed to our hotel. After
getting our room, I took a quick shower, before dressing in a nice suit.

"Why so fancy?" Ness asked as she watched me tighten my tie.

"Because," I said as I rolled her to where she was lying on her stomach on the
bed. "When I get back, I'm taking you out to dinner. Wear something dressy."

"Where are we going?" she asked in excitement.

"It's a surprise," I replied, chuckling at the giddiness on her face.

I made my way out of the hotel and headed to the realtor's office. After about
an hour, I headed back to the hotel and Ness. I was eager to see her again.
We'd only been away from each other for a short time, and I already missed
her. I was so thankful that she had agreed to move in with me. After what
happened between us in the condo, I couldn't let her slip out of my life again.

It wasn't about sex. We were truly connected in everyway except marriage.

And that wasn't far from my mind. But first, I had to wait for my divorce to
become finalized. Then I'd reevaluate things. Ness and I needed some time as
a couple first, but I knew I wanted matrimony down the road.

"Ness," I called out as I entered the hotel room and then froze. Ness stood up
from the chair she was sitting in. She was wearing a one shouldered black
dress that hugged her waistline and floated down mid-thigh. The strap around
her shoulder was shaped into a delicate bow tie.

"Wow," I repeated her word from earlier. "You look amazing."

"Thank you," she said, her cheeks delicately flushing. The sight of it made me
grin. After everything we had shared this afternoon, I could still make her react
like that. We went out front where there was a limousine waiting for us.

"Where are we going?" Ness asked.

"The Century Ballroom," I told her. "There's a restaurant there called The Tin
Room that I've heard positive things about."

"I didn't think there was anything but dance lessons there," Renesmee
remarked.
"It's a little hideaway," I told her with a wink. She looked at me and shook her
head.

"Look at that," she said lightly. "Give a man a little sex and he becomes cocky."

I grabbed her hand and entwined her fingers with mine.

"Give a guy great sex," I stated softly into her ear. "And you'll have one happy
man who will give you everything you could wish for."

Ness's expression turned serious as she reached up and tenderly touched my

face. "I haven't seen you this happy since before you were marri—I mean, since
I was little."

I knew she meant since before I was married, but it went back before then.
Actually, I couldn't remember ever being this happy.

"What can I say?" I told her, kissing the corner of her mouth. "You bring out the
best in me."

The car pulled to a stop, waking us from our sensual world. We headed inside
only to find that the restaurant was on the second floor. We heard loud salsa
music playing above us. One of the employees took us to the service elevator,
and we went up that way. The music got louder as we approached the Century
Ballroom. Across from the entrance to dance room was the door to the
restaurant.

We headed inside the cozy and amazingly quiet interior. One wall was made of
brick creating a warm atmosphere. We were immediately seated, our food
coming a half hour later. Ness and I laughed and joked as we ate our meal, the
mood completely relaxed.

After we were done eating, Ness said, "Now what?"

"Well…" I said hesitantly. "I was thinking maybe we could go dancing."

I held my breath as I waited for her reaction. Somewhere in the back of my

mind, I couldn't help but wonder if she would roll her eyes at me and remind
me that I was crippled. Instead, her eyes sparked with joy.

"Really?" she asked excitedly. In no way was there any doubt in her expression.
I felt my sense of masculinity become completely restored.

"God I love you," I told her intensely.

"I love you, too," she responded immediately. "Now get your ass moving. I want
to dance."
Grinning at her, we made our way across the hall to the ballroom. Couples
everywhere were dancing to the rich Salsa sounds. Ness moved to the edge of
the floor. I looked around and saw a few people staring at me. I turned and
kept my focus on Renesmee.

She spun around, smiling eagerly at me. She looked so happy…and youthful.
But instead of feeling my age, I felt youthful too. A couple of months ago, my
life had been bleak. Now, because of this woman, I had hope again. I had life
again.

Renesmee began to sway her hips dramatically back and forth in front of me.
She started to shake her chest exaggeratingly in my direction. I was
immediately distracted as I watched her breasts sashay back and forth.

"Hey perv," she called out. "My face is up here."

She grabbed my hand and pointed it above my head. Not letting me go, she
began to circle around my chair. As soon as she was in front of me again, I
pulled her onto my lap where she landed with an oof. Just then, the music
slowed down to a romantic song.

"Perfect timing," I muttered. I began to move the chair back and forth. The
motion reminded me of our own rhythm from earlier in this very chair. I knew
Ness was thinking the same thing from the way her eyes traveled to my mouth.
I was about to close the distance between us and capture her lips with mine,
when I heard a voice straight from my nightmares call out.

"Jacob, darling."

Fuck! Pulling back, I sighed and turned towards the voice.

"Hello, Leah." My soon-to-be ex-wife was standing in front of us in a dress too

short and revealing for a woman of her age.

"It's good to see you out and about, my love," she remarked in her false
friendly tone. "I was just thinking today that I should come and visit you and
here you are."

"Well, I guess it's a good thing we ran into each other," I said dryly. "I've just
saved you a trip."

"And I see you're here with our dear, sweet Renesmee," Leah said
condescendingly. My arms wrapped protectively around Ness's waist.

"Who'd you come here with?" I asked, not really caring. I just wanted Leah
away from Renesmee. "Last I heard you were in Barbados with your personal
trainer."
"I didn't come here with anyone, darling. We are still married after all."

"The divorce will be final by the end of next week," I reminded her through
gritted teeth.

"Semantics," Leah replied with a shrug. "We should get together for dinner now
that you're back in town."

"I'm sorry, but that's impossible," I replied as politely as I could. I'd rather have
dinner with a pit full of poisonous snakes. "We're heading back to La Push
tomorrow."

"Well, I should let you and little Nessie get on with your play date then. I'll see
you later, darling."

She kissed the air dramatically before turning and walking away. I held Ness
even tighter to me. Something in my future ex-wife's expression sent chills
down my spine.

I had the horrible feeling that I hadn't seen the last of Leah.

Chapter 14 – Dark Clouds Ahead

Jacob's POV

I picked up Ness's hand as the plane began to descend, lightly kissing her soft
knuckles. We were going to be landing in Port Angeles soon, and then it was
back to La Push. In a way, I was sad to see Seattle go.

Even after running into Leah at the club, Renesmee hadn't let the mood be
spoiled for either of us. Her never ending enthusiasm for life had quickly
bounced back. We'd danced the rest of the night away, Ness for the most part
sitting in my lap as I rocked the chair back and forth in time to the music. I had
noticed guys watching her hungrily the few times she'd danced around me, her
hypnotic hips swaying to the music, but she never saw anyone but me. And I
had made sure to kiss and hold her close so that everyone knew she was with
me.

Afterwards, we went back to our hotel and continued where we had left off in
the penthouse. We'd taken our time loving each other, spending our entire
Sunday pleasuring one another. We had played a sensual game, each trying to
outdo the other.

I yawned and closed my eyes briefly. Though it had been a great weekend,
catching an early flight home the next day probably hadn't been the best idea.
The plane landed and Ness and I were allowed to leave the plane first. Getting
into my wheelchair, we retrieved our bags from the luggage terminal and made
our way to where we had parked my car. Climbing into the driver's side, I
looked at Ness and wiggled my eyebrows up and down a few times.

"So…what do you want to do when we get back?"

Renesmee's face turned seductive. I watched with anticipation as she leaned

close to me. I went still as I felt her lips brush my jaw.

"I'm exercising your ass," she answered.

"Perfect," I told her as I turned my head and claimed her lips with mine. Pulling
away slightly, I said, "That's exactly what I had in mind."

"No, you don't understand," Ness replied with a smirk. She moved back over to
her side of the car. "We haven't done physical therapy in a few days. You're
going to workout when you get home."

"Tease," I said before whining jokingly, "We only just got back."

"I don't care. It's Monday, which means it's a workout day for you," she
returned. "Your legs will never get better if you don't consistently work out."

"They're never going to get better regardless," I stated matter-of-factually.

"Jacob—"

"No, it's okay," I interrupted before she could lecture me. "I'm really okay with
it now, Ness."

"How can you say that?"

I looked out the front windshield with a frown. "I've always believed that all
things happen for a reason whether we know it or not. I finally figured out why
this happened to me."

"And why is that?"

I looked at her tenderly then. "If I hadn't gotten hurt, we wouldn't be where we
are right now. I love you, Nessie. If it weren't for the accident, you'd probably
still be with that dickhead, and I'd still be with the witch."

"Don't call them that," she said, even as a half smile appeared on her lips.

"The point is that I've accepted who I am. I know that I'm still me even if I am
confined to a wheelchair. And that's all because of you. Whether I walk again or
not is irrelevant, as long as I have you."

Renesmee gave a little sniff. "That's probably the sweetest, most romantically
mushy thing anyone's ever said to me."
I grinned widely at her. "I aim to please."

"It still doesn't get you out of your afternoon exercises," she told me with a lift
of one eyebrow.

"Fine," I grumbled as I started the car, but I felt a smile tug on my lips as I
heard Renesmee giggle next to me.

We made our way back to the reservation. As we passed the center of town, I
pulled the car up to a stop sign. Looking out my window, I saw Collin and Brady
standing outside the rez's grocery store. They looked like they were having an
argument. Collin threw his hands up in exasperation at one point. He caught
sight of my car and waved. Brady turned in our direction. His face became
glacial as soon as he saw Renesmee in the car with me. With what could only
be described as a stomp, he hurried down the sidewalk. Collin pointed at
Brady's back with his thumb and shook his head before making the jerk-off sign
with his other hand. I nodded and gave him a wave, before putting the car into
drive again.

"What's with Brady? Have we really offended him that much?" Renesmee asked
in a quiet voice.

"He's become a bit of a zealot," I explained. "He thinks we're sinners because
we got together before my divorce was finalized."

"I'm sorry," she whispered.

I glanced at her before concentrating back on the road. "What do you have to
be sorry for?"

"For ruining your friendship."

"Ness, c'mon," I said as I pulled into my driveway. "If that's the kind of narrow-
minded asshole that Brady is, it's no loss. Besides, it's not your fault."

Renesmee gave me a weak smile and got out of the now parked car without
another word. She grabbed our bags as I reached behind me for my
wheelchair. Once I was settled, we made our way inside the house—

And saw Seth in his boxer shorts eating at my kitchen island. Jenny was
standing on the other side in her robe, pouring a cup of coffee. When she saw
us, her hand jerked and coffee spilled over the side of her mug. Seth looked at
us and smiled.

"Hey, how was Seattle?" he asked as though it were an everyday occurrence

for us to find him half naked in my kitchen.

"How was Seattle?" I repeated dumbfounded. "What the hell is this?"

"Breakfast," Seth answered with a shrug, grabbing a muffin and stuffing his
face.

I looked over at Renesmee to see if she was seeing the same thing I was. She
had a half shocked/half amused expression on her face. I felt better knowing I
wasn't the only one feeling confused.

"I mean you," I said to Seth. "What are you doing here?"

"Uh…Jake, that would be my fault." Jenny spoke for the first time.

"I thought you hated Seth," I reminded her and saw Seth cringe.

"I do," she quickly answered. Seth went pale and got up wobbly to his feet.
Jenny's head whipped to his and her face instantly softened. "I mean I used to. I
don't anymore though."

"I can see that," I replied, my eyes giving Seth's shirtless attire a once over.

Jenny's face flamed before she said almost questioningly, "Umm…we made
up?"

"Yeah, I think I got that, too," I responded, starting to feel amusement in the
situation. "Well, well, well, after all this time of you lecturing me, Jenny. How
many times did you tell me over the summer that I should put every effort I
had into winning Ness over? And you turn around and have sex in my house—
in your employer's house—with someone you hate."

"Technically, I'm an employee too," Seth spoke up.

"This is shameful behavior…absolutely shameful," I told them gravelly while

trying to fight off a smirk.

Nessie gave me a knowing look. "Stuff it, Jacob. After the way you've been
acting towards me. You're my employer. Should I accuse you of sexual
harassment?"

I picked up her hand and ran my thumb across the back of it. "Does it count as
sexual harassment if you're a willing victim?"

Seth, who'd been eyeing our play-by-play like an avid sports fanatic, suddenly
burst out, "Holy shit, you two slept together!"

"Classy, Seth," I said, rolling my eyes at him.

"You dirty dog you," he replied, giving me a shit-eating grin.

"You're one to talk," I stated, looking pointedly at Jenny who glared at me.
"You defiled my poor Nessie?" she remarked.

"Oh yeah," I boasted proudly. Renesmee made a huffing noise.

"And on that note, I'm going to unpack my bag," she told us. Glancing at me,
she said, "Don't forget. I want to see you in the gym in a half hour."

"You two just got home. Don't you want to eat brunch?" Jenny said.

"That's okay, thanks Jenny," Ness responded. "Jake needs to do his exercises,
or he'll pay for it later."

Seth snorted. "Didn't he get enough exercise this weekend? He's an old man,
you know. You need to take it easy on the guy."

Jenny went over and smacked Seth on the back of the head. He responded by
wrapping his arm around her waist and kissing the corner of her mouth. Jenny
seemed to melt under the attention. This was going to take some getting used
to.

"I think Jake can handle what I throw at him," Ness said, giving me a saucy
wink, before going down the hallway to her bedroom.

I watched her leave, feeling myself grin as I stared at her butt. Seth said,
"Jacob, stop smiling like that. You're beginning to scare me."

I sighed as Renesmee disappeared from my sight as she entered her room.

Rolling my chair over to Jenny and Seth, I said, "So…when did this happen."

"Umm…" Jenny replied, looking at her fingernail suddenly as though it were the
most interesting thing in the world. "I guess you could say it happened right
after you were married."

"What?" I exclaimed.

"Not right away," Seth assured me. "We flirted for awhile, but we didn't actually
have sex until the night my divorce became final."

"Jeez Seth," Jenny said, her face red again. "Ever hear of giving out too much
information."

"It's called TMI," he answered, putting the word TMI in air quotes. "I'm down
with the kids' lingo, baby."

"Aww, that's so sweet, honey," she responded, leaning in to kiss Seth's lips.

"Yeah…I really don't need to be here for this, do I?" I spoke dryly.
"Sorry." Jenny pulled away from Seth's embrace. "Anyway, Seth was a
complete ass to me after it happened—"

"Typical," I interrupted, which they both ignored.

"And I've been trying to win Jen back ever since," Seth said, looking at her
adoringly.

"Yes, you have, sweetheart," Jenny said, snuggling into Seth's side. I made a
gagging noise. Jenny glared at me in return. "Anyway, Seth came over on
Friday—"

"And I told her how much I needed her in my life," Seth interjected.

"And then after we talked, I invited him to come back over Saturday night to
eat some apple pie I made," Jenny explained.

"Which was amazing, by the way," Seth remarked, earning him a glowing look
from Jenny. "And then I came over again last night to watch some movies..."

"And we started kissing…"

"And one thing led to another…"

"And…" They both said in unison.

I quickly held up my hand. "I think I can figure out what happened next."

"I'm sorry, Jake," Jenny said as she looked at me in embarrassment. "We didn't
realize you and Ness would be home so soon, otherwise we wouldn't have been
dressed like this when you got here."

"That's okay. I'm just glad you were wearing something at all," I replied,
grimacing when Seth leaned over and began whispering sappy sentiments in
Jenny's ear making her giggle. I shook my head in amazement. Jenny was a
tough, no nonsense woman. Yet in Seth's arms, she was putty.

"Is this how it's going to be from now on?" I questioned. "Will I be coming home
every day to find Seth walking around my house in his boxers?"

"Well, if that's the way you want it," Seth said, batting his eyes at me.

I sighed dramatically and looked up at the ceiling. "Why do I surround myself

with people like this?"

"People like what?" I heard Ness's voice and turned around. She was standing
in tiny workout shorts and a sports bra. Very little was left to the imagination.

"Fuck me," I whispered aloud as I stared at the soft curves of her belly area.
"I think that's Nessie's job now," Seth replied, earning himself another hit on
the back of the head from Jenny.

"You about ready?" Ness asked.

"I'd say he's more than ready." Seth snorted.

"That's it." I turned my chair so that I was facing my voyeurs. "Jen, take the day
off. And take this dipshit with you."

"You got it, boss," Jenny said, giving Seth a look that made him instantly beam.

Muttering to myself, I rolled into my bedroom and quickly got changed. When I
returned to the kitchen, it was to find it blessedly Seth-free. I went into the
exercise room and found Renesmee on the floor doing stretches. I cocked my
head as I took a moment to enjoy the view. I knew that Ness realized I was
there when a quirky smile appeared on her lips.

"Well," she finally said, looking at me. "Are you going to workout or gawk?"

"Gawk, definitely," I told her.

She crossed her arms over her chest and gave a look that said, don't push it.
Chuckling, I made my over to her and laid down on the mat. I started stretching
out my arms as Ness had taught me to do in the past.

"So what do you think about Seth and Jenny?" she asked, as she grabbed my
one leg. She placed it so that my knee rested on her shoulder while the rest of
my leg went down her back. She leaned forward, stretching my useless thigh
muscles. It was something a position we'd done countless times before, and
each time it made my perverted mind go into overdrive. It was even worse
after the weekend we'd just had. I forced myself to concentrate on the ceiling.

"I'm glad for them," I told her honestly. "Seth is a great guy. He deserves some
happiness. So does Jenny."

"Yeah," Ness said as she started to work on the other leg, hovering over me as
she stretched. "It seems that everything is working out for everyone."

"Mmhmm," I agreed. Reaching out quickly, I pulled her down on top of me

causing her to shriek a little. "Speaking of things working out, Jen is going to be
gone today. We have the place to ourselves."

"The only working out that's going to happen right now is you doing your
exercises. I'm not doing anything else with you until we finish your physical
therapy."

"You're withholding your body from me?" I said in mock despair.

"Absolutely. Now get to work, Black." She pulled away from me and went over
to where we had some free weights. Grumbling, I started to make my way
across the floor when I felt a sharp shooting pain in my body.

"What is it?" Renesmee asked, instantly rushing to my side.

"Spasm," I told her, trying to breath through the pain.

"Where is it?"

"Here," I rolled over on my stomach as carefully as I could and pointed to

where the spasm was coming from.

"Is this a line?"

"What?" I could barely get out.

"You're having a spasm in your ass area?"

The pain was beginning to make its way upward. "Jesus, Renesmee, I'm not
going to lie about something like this."

"Sorry." Her hands were instantly on me, applying just the right pressure. She
worked quietly for a moment before she said, "You know, you should consider
these spasms a good sign. It just means your nerve endings are talking to each
other."

"Right," I gritted out as I closed my eyes. When the gripping pain began to
ease, I felt my shoulders relax. "I'm sorry I snapped at you."

"That's okay," she said. "I should have known you were being serious."

I smiled a little. "Still, it did get your hands on my butt…"

"Forget it, I'm onto you now," Ness replied. "How do you feel now? Is the pain
gone?"

"Yeah, thanks," I said, cautiously rolling over onto my back.

She looked at me carefully. "Is that the first time you've had a pain in that
region?"

"A pain in the butt?" I replied with a snort. "Nah, Seth just left."

"I'm serious, Jacob."

I sat up on my elbows. "I don't know, maybe. Why?"

Ness was beginning to look excited. "The area that triggered your spasm was
very close to your upper thigh. You're beginning to feel pain closer to your
legs."

"Oh," I said, trying not to get too excited myself. "That doesn't mean anything
though."

Renesmee moved so that she was near my feet. I watched as she touched one
foot, running her fingers from the heel to the toes. It aggravated me to no end
that I couldn't actually feel that.

"Anything?" she asked.

"No," I told her despondently.

She moved so that she was sitting next to my knees. She leaned down and
placed her hands on my outer ankles before moving them up to my knees. She
looked at me questioningly and I shook my head. She got to my upper thigh
area and again I had to shake my head when I didn't feel anything. Frustration
overtook me and I slammed my one fist against the floor mat.

"It's okay, Jake."

"How is it okay?" I questioned hopelessly.

"Because…" She picked up my hand and placed it against my head. "You still
feel here."

She next moved my hand to my heart. "And you still feel here."

I looked at her and was surprised to see tears in her eyes.

"You're still alive, Jacob," she whispered. "Whether you walk again or not,
you're still alive. I've had nightmares thinking about what could have happened
to you during the accident. At least you're with me."

She moved my hand so that it was next to her mouth. She gave the center of
my palm a kiss.

"That's true. We have each other," I said gruffly. I pulled her to me. This time
she didn't resist. "I love you Renesmee Cullen."

"I love you, too," she murmured before joining her mouth to mine.

We spent the next couple of hours christening the floor mats like I'd always
wanted to. And over the next week, Ness and I spent every moment together.
Our days were filled with laughter and physical therapy. Our evenings were
filled with discussion and movie marathons. And our nights were filled with
passion.
Ness didn't return to her room after our Seattle weekend. Instead, we spent
hours in my bed talking, touching, discovering, and becoming closer than we'd
ever been before. During our exploration into the land of intimacy, I discovered
that Ness was a cuddler. She liked to be held throughout the night; something I
had always abhorred doing before. Yet with Ness, my arms felt empty if I didn't
hold her. We were in a world of our own, completely secluded from the rest of
society. Somewhere in the background was Jenny, running things as smoothly
as ever, giving us food and drink when we resurfaced, but otherwise, it was just
Nessie and me.

I was completely and utterly happy. Life with Renesmee was like a dream come
true for me...well almost. Somewhere in the back of my mind was my promise
to Edward. I had told him I'd tell Renesmee the truth about my relationship with
Bella and I had given my word. That was important to me. All I needed was the
right time to tell her.

But like everything else in my life, things rarely worked to my advantage. I

woke up Saturday morning feeling as though something was off. I reached for
Ness, but she wasn't beside me. I quickly sat up and looked at her side of the
bed. A note was attached to her pillow.

Out doing some errands. Will be back around noon. Jenny is out with Seth
today, but she made you a quiche for breakfast. Be back soon.

Love,

Ness

I looked at the clock near my bedside table. It was almost 11:30 AM. Getting
into my wheelchair, I went over to my bedroom window and checked the
weather. There were dark clouds in the sky, but otherwise things looked
perfectly normal. I still couldn't shake the feeling that something was wrong.

I made my way into the bathroom and took a shower. After getting dressed, I
went into the kitchen and ate some of the quiche Jenny made. I was just
finishing up when the doorbell rang. With a slight frown, I rolled myself to the
door and opened it.

Leah was standing on the other side.

"Darling," she said, bending down to kiss my lips. I quickly rolled away from her
before we could make contact.

"What the hell are you doing here, Leah?"

She entered the room and looked around. "This is nice, Jake. Quite the retreat
you have here."
"Is this why you came to La Push?" I asked impatiently. "To discuss the décor?"

Leah turned back to me. She fiddled with the belt of her beige trench coat.

"Of course not, love. I came here to see you."

"Why?"

"I missed you, of course."

My eyes narrowed. "Cut the bullshit. What do you want?"

"Can I at least sit down?"

I jerked my head in the direction of the couch. She sat and resumed her
inspection of the room.

"I love it here, Jacob. It's absolutely perfect."

Something in the way she stated that put me on edge. "Perfect for what?"

She gave me an innocent look. "Why, perfect for us, darling."

I stared at her as if she had just sprouted another head. "What the fuck are you
talking about?"

Leah moved quickly. Before I knew it she was on her knees next to me. She
grabbed my hand and held the back of it to her chest.

"I've decided that asking for a divorce was a horrendous mistake," she told me,
giving me a smile as if that made up for everything.

"You mean my condition doesn't disgust you anymore? Have you forgotten that
I'm still paralyzed?"

"Oh…that." Leah had the decency to blush. "We can work around that."

"Work around it? You served me divorce papers while I was in the hospital
because you said you weren't cut out to live with a cripple."

"I was upset."

"And I wasn't?" I asked incredulously.

"Jake, you're the only man I've ever truly loved," she said simply. A part of me
almost believed her. Maybe Leah did love me in her own way…as much as she
was capable of loving someone other than herself.

"Leah, the only reason we married was because of the baby. It was over the
moment our son was stillborn."
Leah flinched. "Must you say it so coldly?"

"If that's the only way to get through to you then yes. I don't know why you're
here now when you've had all this time to reconsider, but I have no interest in
resuming our marriage. Our lives together were miserable. You cheated on me
numerous times…did you think I wasn't aware of that?"

"Yet I always came back to you," Leah defended as if that made it okay.

"And why did you come back? For the money? The prestige?"

"I told you already. It's because I love you, Jacob," she stated dramatically.

I shook my head. "That's not the kind of love I want or need. It's over, Leah.
There's someone else now."

Leah's cheeks burned in angry rejection. She stood up in front of me, her hands
going to the belt of her coat.

"I can make you forget her…just like I made you forget Bella." She undid her
coat and pushed it off her body, revealing a black lace teddy. "We were always
good together this way."

I was so shocked I didn't react as Leah sat down on my lap. She grabbed my
hand and placed it on the area between her thighs.

"Make me wet for you, darling," she murmured. I snapped out of my stupor and
was trying to pull my hand away when I heard the front door open. Leah heard
it too. She tightened her grip on my wrist, holding me to her as she mashed her
lips against mine and began moaning loudly.

"Am I interrupting something?" Renesmee's cold voice asked.

I tore my mouth away from Leah. I looked at Ness with horror on my face. She
looked at me as if I'd just climbed out of the fiery pits of hell.

"Ness, this isn't what it looks like," I stated, instantly cringing at the old cliché.

"What? You're not finger fucking Leah right now?" she questioned lividly.

"Oh Nessie, this is what married people do," Leah said sneeringly.

My patience reached its boiling point. With my temper snapping, I shoved Leah
off my lap. She landed at my feet ungracefully.

"Get out," I told her menacingly, my lips barely moving in my fury. "If you come
near me again, I'll file a restraining order. Wouldn't that be something for the
society pages to write about?"
The threat was enough to make Leah stand to her feet, her body shaking in its
indignation.

"Over her?" Leah screeched, pointing to Renesmee.

"I told you our marriage is over. I told you I found someone else. I love Ness
more than I've ever loved anyone…including you." I was beyond trying to spare
Leah's feelings at this point. In the nine years of constant fighting, being
cheated on, and being humiliated by this woman, she had rarely ever
considered mine.

Renesmee's expression softened at my words, though she stiffened when Leah

scoffed and said, "You love her more than anyone else? Really Jacob? What
about your precious Bella? Do you love her more than the woman you've been
obsessed with for years?"

"Shut the fuck up!" I roared. Her face became triumphant right before she
turned to Renesmee who was now looking at me with disbelieving eyes.

"Did he tell you that he loved you?" Leah asked piteously. "Well dearie, he lied.
He could never love you. He never even loved me. He's been in love with your
darling mother since before you were born. He's completely obsessed by her.
He used to shout out her name while he was climaxing inside of me—"

"Leah, that's enough!" I yelled furiously. She ignored me. Renesmee became
paler with each word Leah spoke.

"But then again, I guess it's difficult to get over the first woman you ever slept
with," Leah finished victoriously.

At that Renesmee blanched. Her face was now ashen as she looked at me with
horrified eyes. "You slept with my mother?"

I felt my world unravel. "Nessie, let me explain—"

"And you've been in love with her all these years?"

"Ness, please," I pleaded, but it was too late. The guilty admittance was written
all over my face.

She backed away slowly, her head shaking back and forth, her eyes wide.
Without another word, Renesmee turned and fled down the hall. I heard her
bedroom door close quietly behind her. Leah turned and looked at me smugly.

"Ah…there's nothing like a woman scorned, wouldn't you say, darling?"

I looked at Leah and felt a dead calm that I'd never experienced before. I pulled
my cell phone out of my pocket and dialed a number. Jasper's voicemail picked
up several moments later.

"Jasper, this is Jacob Black. I want to get a restraining order against Leah. I also
want to renegotiate the terms of the divorce. I know I told you that I wouldn't
enforce the pre-nuptial agreement I had with Leah, but I want to do that now. I
want everything. Our penthouse in Seattle, the cars…all of it. I also want to
make sure that the monthly allowance I had initially offered her doesn't
happen. Leah gets nothing, understand? If her lawyer gives you any problems,
make sure the judge knows that Leah abandoned our marriage while I was in
the hospital. And contact your investigator Maria. Get the pictures she took of
Leah having sex on that beach in Barbados while I was laid up in the hospital.
The judge should see that as well."

I hung up the phone. Leah looked at me with loathing and fear.

"You had someone spy on me?" she asked in a shaky voice.

"I know you, darling," I said mockingly. "I knew you would try something like
this, though I underestimated how far you'd sink."

"You can't do this, Jacob." She looked like a woman who knew she was about to
lose everything. Good.

"You showed me what a woman scorned looks like. Now you know what a man
will do. And now…get the fuck out of my house before I call the police and have
them escort you out."

"You bastard," she yelled before turning away from me. She went to the front
door, but swiveled around to face me one more time. "This isn't over. Not by a
long shot."

I chuckled cruelly. "Yeah, Leah…it is."

She went out the door, slamming it behind her. I didn't even wait for it to close
before I was heading to Ness's room. She came out in the hall before I got
there, carrying two large bags. My heart dropped.

"What are you doing?" I whispered, looking at her red, puffy eyes.

I saw her swallow before she said in a choked voice, "I'm leaving."

"Ness, wait." I tried to reach for her, but she jerked back. I stilled, my stomach
twisting. I begged quietly, "Please let me explain."

She shook her head. "Just tell me one thing. Did you sleep with my mother?"
I closed my eyes, my body lancing over in pain. Finally, I forced myself to look
at her.

"It was a long time ago."

Ness's face crumbled and she let out a sob. Turning away from me, she asked,
"Were…were you imagining it was her while you were having sex with me?"

"What?" I questioned, horrified. "Of course not. Ness, I love you—"

I reached for her, but she took another step away from me.

"Don't," she snapped. She wouldn't look at me. "All this time…all these years, I
always felt like you were hurting over something, even before Leah. I just never
once thought that the reason you were hurting was because you were in love
with my mother. God, I'm so stupid. The signs were there and I never paid
attention…I never connected the dots. The way you used to freeze when she'd
come close to you. The way you'd sometimes stare at her. Your feelings were
so obvious, and I never wanted to acknowledge them. And then when you
couldn't get the woman you really wanted, you settled for her daughter."

"That's not true. Renesmee, please," I pleaded. "Let's sit down and talk about
this."

She looked at me then and I felt my world shatter around me. She was staring
at me as though I were a complete stranger…one she didn't want to know or
be around.

"There's nothing to say," she replied. "Don't come near me again."

She walked around me and left the house, the front door closing softly behind
her. I rolled myself into the living room and looked around, feeling empty. This
past week, I had been filled with life and laughter.

Now I had nothing. Everything I had Renesmee took with her.

Chapter 15 – See You When I See You

Ness's POV

I walked around a crowd of German tourists and made my way to my favorite

spot on the Rialto Bridge. Coming to Venice had been just what I needed after
Leah's bombshell…after my life had been shattered into oblivion.

When I had left Jacob's house that fateful day over a month and a half ago, I
had gone straight to Forks to see my Grandpa Carlisle. I told him I needed to
get out of town. My grandfather owned an apartment in Venice. I had so many
fond memories of going there as a child with my parents. I begged him to let
me use it only to be told he'd loaned it to an Italian friend and his wife.

My grandfather had looked at me worriedly when he told me this. He probably

had noticed the blatant horror in my eyes that I couldn't quite hide after finding
out about Jacob's past relationship with my mom. My grandpa ended up calling
his friend on my behalf and asked if I could stay with them for awhile. The
answer we received was that I was more than welcome.

Dr. Aro Volaterrae and his wife, Jane, had been kind to me, though I had to
admit I was a little creeped out by their relationship. Aro was in his sixties; Jane
was younger than me. I wasn't really in the position to judge them considering I
had fallen in love with a man my parents' age, but Jacob was only seventeen
years older than me. There was a good forty-seven years age difference
between Aro and his wife. But it was obvious that Jane was the one in charge of
their relationship. She'd just smile at him in a certain way and Aro would be
putty in her hands. Still, they gave me my privacy. They never once asked me
why I came to the breakfast table each morning with puffy eyes, though I'd felt
Aro's concerned gaze on me more than once.

The truth was that I wasn't ready to talk to anyone about what I'd learned. I
couldn't even think about it without getting queasy. I realized just this morning
though that I'd have to head back home soon. And classes for school had
started two weeks ago. If I stayed any longer, I'd have to drop the semester.

A part of me didn't care. I didn't think school was in my foreseeable future now
anyway. Plus, I couldn't work up any enthusiasm for my major anymore.
Physical therapy reminded me too much of Jacob.

I felt myself frown as I watched a gondola lazily go by on the canal below. I

wondered for what felt like the millionth time how Jake was doing. He had left
me frantic voicemails soon after I left him, begging me to talk to him…to let
him explain. I never returned his messages. The calls had dwindled to once a
day over the past couple of weeks. I hadn't received any the last few days. I
probably could have called my mother to find out how he was, but Jacob was
now a taboo topic between us.

After I had made the arrangements with my grandfather to go to Venice, I had

gone to Bremerton to confront my mom. She hadn't appeared surprised to see
me when I arrived, which meant that Jake must have called her before I got
there. The idea of them discussing me, or even talking at all had sent me into a
rage. I'd immediately confronted her.

"How could you not tell me that you and Jake used to have sex? Didn't you
think I had a right to know after you found out I was dating him?" I yelled, the
volume of my voice rising emotionally with each word.
"Ness, please," my mother said, her face paler than normal. My mom and I
both had very light complexions. I wondered agonizingly if that was another
reason Jacob had been drawn to me…because I had the same coloring as my
mom. She looked at me, silently pleading for understanding. "It was a long time
ago. Let the past stay in the past."

"He slept with you!" I spat out, struggling for breath as the pain of that
reminder sliced through me.

"Before you were even born!" my mom countered. "Why get upset over
something that happened so long ago when Jake and I were only teenagers?"

I shook my head as I stared at her in disbelief. "How can I not get upset? He
had sex with you. He's wanted you ever since. And when he couldn't be with
you he slept with me! How can that be okay?"

"I didn't know he slept with you," my mother whispered.

"But you had to have known that was coming," I responded bitterly. "You knew
we were dating. And you couldn't bother to mention that you had sex with him
first?"

"You found out about my past with Jake after he slept with you?"

"Yes," I confirmed, feeling my eyes well with tears.

"Oh Jacob, that idiot," my mother murmured before looking at me. "Ness, sit
down."

She pointed at the couch. I wanted to defy her childishly, but I did as I was told.
She sat down next to me and reached for my one hand. I quickly moved it so
she couldn't touch me. She flinched as though I'd slapped her.

"Renesmee, you need to understand something. Jake and I have been friends
for a long time, even before we dated. After his mother died though, things
changed briefly between us. He needed comfort in his life; some kind of
womanly affection. I was it. The sex was born out of my need to comfort him.
As soon as I met your dad though, Jake's and my relationship went back to how
it always should have been…friends and nothing more."

"So in other words, if you hadn't met Dad, you'd still be with him," I replied, my
heart breaking all over again.

"No," she said with a shake of the head. "Jake and I weren't meant for each
other."

"You might have stopped loving him," I told her, tears finally spilling from my
eyes. "But he's loved you ever since you two broke up."
My mother reached up and wiped a tear away from my cheek before I could
stop her. "Honey, he doesn't love me."

"He pretty much admitted it," I argued back.

My mom shook her head. "Jacob's a stubborn ass. When he gets an idea in his
head, he doesn't let it go. But that's just it. It was an idea. I think Jake needed
to hold onto something familiar after his mother died. He may have thought he
was in love with me, but he hasn't been for a long time. Maybe not ever."

I scoffed. "Is that what you seriously believe? I saw him with my own eyes,
Mom. All these years he's worshipped you."

"No baby, you're wrong on that," my mother insisted. "I mean, Jake loves me,
sure. But he's not in love with me."

"Why are you denying it?" The little patience I had left was running out.

"Because," my mother replied firmly. "I've never seen Jacob look at anyone,
including me, the way he looks at you."

I sucked in a breath at that, unable to answer.

"I know Jake, Renesmee. He loves you very much. He's crazy about you. All I've
ever wanted was for him to find some happiness in his life. He hasn't had a lot.
He's lost so much…his mother, his father, his child. The one beacon of light in
Jacob's darkness has always been you, even when you were just a kid. I
remember all the times he used to show up at our house looking so lost. Yet
you always had a way to reach him and make him smile. I know how much it
bothered him when you distanced yourself from him after he married Leah. He
used to ask me about you all the time. Then after your twentieth birthday,
Jake's questioning changed. He'd ask me things a married man shouldn't ask…
questions regarding if you were dating anyone, if it was serious. He seemed so
jealous when I told him about Nahuel. I remember even teasing him a few
times, telling him he had a crush on you. But it was when I saw you two in the
hospital together…that's when I knew. It was so obvious that you were in love
with one another. Why do you think I suggested you help him with his physical
therapy?"

She smiled sadly at me and said, "He needs you, Nessie. And you need him,
too. I want you both to be happy. Don't let something that happened before
you were born ruin your relationship."

"Mom…I'm just so confused," I confessed. "I need time away. To get used to
the idea of y-you and him."
"I understand," she said, tucking a tendril of my hair behind my ear. "Just think
about what I said while you're gone, okay?"

"Okay."

"Nessie…" She seemed hesitant. "We're all right, aren't we?"

I looked at her before slowly nodding. It hurt, her past with Jacob. But I knew in
my heart she wanted what was best for me.

She looked relieved before she asked, "When will I see you again?"

"I don't know." I shrugged. "I'll see you when I see you. But I'll think about what
you said while I'm gone, I promise."

I kept my word, too. All I thought about over the past month and a half was
what she'd said to me. We talked a few times on the phone since then, but my
mother had the good sense to never bring up topics that would threaten the
fragile thread of our relationship. She kept our conversations neutral. She had
tried bringing up Jacob only once, but I had immediately interrupted and
threatened to end communication with her if she brought him up again. It hurt
too much to talk about him, especially with my mom. She never discussed
Jacob after that, though I had the feeling she wanted to. My father, on the other
hand, was surprisingly not so reserved on the topic.

"Nessie, why don't you give Jake a call?" he implored a few weeks ago.

"I can't believe this," I muttered. "I don't want to talk about him, Dad. You of all
people should understand—"

"Renesmee, what happened between your mother and Jacob has nothing to do
with you. Hell, it has nothing to do with even me. If anyone has a right to be
upset about their past relationship, don't you think it should be me? Your
mother didn't stop being friends with Jake after she and I began dating. She
even insisted that he be your godfather. I agreed to it, and I never once
regretted it. I could have been an ass. I could have insisted that Jacob stay out
of our lives. I would have missed out on a having a great friend if I had. And
need I remind you that you were the one who wanted a relationship with Jake.
No one ever comes without baggage."

"That's a lot of baggage to accept," I protested bitterly.

My father sighed tiredly over the phone. "If you love someone, you accept
everything about that person. Jake's still the same person you fell in love with,
Ness. He's still the same guy that you've always known. Sure, he's made some
horrible mistakes. I told him when you came to see us that he needed to tell
you the truth. I think he was scared though…probably because he knew you'd
react in the exact manner that you did. You claim to be an adult. Act like it.
Adults don't run away. They face their problems."

I swallowed painfully. "Dad, it just…it hurts so much."

"I know it hurts. He loved someone else before you. But Ness, he's seventeen
years older than you. Of course he would have loved someone else before you.
He's got a few years ahead of you, kid. It would have been strange if he hadn't
been in love before. But Jake has always adored you. He'd never do anything to
deliberately hurt you, which is probably why he avoided telling you about the
past in the first place. Ness, call him. Who cares that once upon a time he
loved your mother? It's you he loves now."

"I'll consider it," I told him, though I knew it was still too soon.

I think my father must have sensed my hesitation because he said, "Jake…he's

not doing so well."

My heart instantly worried. "Is he not doing his physical therapy?"

"No, actually in that department he's been working overtime—"

"Dad," I said, finally reaching my limit. "I know you mean well and I know you
think I'm being childish, but I just can't have this conversation anymore. I don't
want to talk about Jake. Please respect that."

"Fine," my father said in frustration. "But let me just say this. Think about
calling him. Last time I saw him—I don't know—he looked really worn down. But
his eyes…there was something unsettling in them, like he was barely holding
on. He needs you, baby."

"Goodbye Dad." I'd ended the conversation then and that was the last time my
father brought Jacob up.

Of course I never tried to get a hold of Jake. I knew I was being stupid and
overdramatic, but I needed this time away from him. I needed time to think. It
wasn't the fact that Jake slept with my mom that bothered me so much. The
problem was that I didn't know if Jake's feelings for me had ever been real. I
couldn't help but wonder if he only said he loved me because I reminded him of
my mother. How did I ever know that Jake loved me for me, and not as some
pathetic substitute for the woman he really wanted? My mom had said he
never looked at anyone like he looked at me. But how did I know if he was
looking at me and only seeing her?

I felt someone approach me, but I ignored them as my thoughts continued to

linger over my painful self-doubt.
"You were right," I heard a deep familiar voice say next to me. My stomach
lurched and my hands began to tremble as I spun quickly in shock. Jacob was
standing a few feet away from me.

"I-I was?" I replied, barely able to form the sentence.

"The view here is amazing," Jake stated, nodding towards the water, never
taking his eyes off of me. "You once told me when we first started doing
physical therapy together that this was your favorite spot in the world. You said
that when you were little you used to picture returning here someday with the
man of your dreams so that you could both enjoy the romantic view. I had
asked if you had the guy picked out, but you never answered me, remember?"

"That's because it was you," I whispered before I could stop myself. Jacob
closed his eyes in response. I noticed the purple circles of exhaustion under
them.

That wasn't the only thing I noticed. Jake was standing in front of me, leaning
heavily on a white cane. He opened his eyes and stared at me tenderly before
taking a couple of stiff steps towards me.

And that's when it really hit me. Jacob was in Venice. He was walking towards
me!

He was walking!

"You…you're walking," I stated in shock.

"Yeah," Jake confirmed with a half smile though his eyes were dark and serious.
"I would have been here as soon as you left me, but your parents wouldn't tell
me where you had gone. They're both pretty pissed at me…said I had to clean
up my own mess. And then about a week after you left, I woke up one morning
to sharp, excruciating pain in both of my legs."

He chuckled briefly. "I never thought I'd be so happy to be in pain. You called it.
You said it was a good sign that my last spasm was close to my thigh. I spent
the past month doing hardcore physical therapy. I had a lot of motivation to get
back on my feet, you see."

He stopped walking when there was less than a foot between us. He put the
cane against the bridge and placed a hand on the structure to steady himself.
He never looked away from me as he continued to speak.

"Then things got a little messy with my divorce. I had everything taken away
from Leah. She tried to fight it, but it looked really bad on her end that she
served me divorce papers as soon as she found out I was paralyzed. It took a
few more weeks then expected, but the divorce is now official. I was going to
try to come see you last weekend, but of course, something else came up.
Jenny and Seth eloped in Reno and they wanted me to be there—"

"Seth and Jenny are married?"

"Yep." Jacob grinned, causing my heart to leap practically out of my chest.

I shook my head, still in disbelief that Jake was here. "How did you end up-"

"Finding you?" He reached out as if to touch me, but dropped his hand, most
likely worried that I'd reject him. "Carlisle told me."

"My grandfather told you where I was?" I asked incredulously.

"Well," Jacob said, looking suddenly mischievous. "Not by choice. I was going
crazy trying to figure out where you were. You wouldn't answer my calls. And
like I said, your parents wouldn't tell me anything. I knew you hadn't returned
to school. Then I thought about how much you said you loved this place. I also
remembered that your family had the apartment here. I went to Carlisle and
said something like, 'How's Ness enjoying Venice?' He thought I already knew
where you were so he confirmed it and said you seemed homesick last time he
spoke to you."

"That was pretty low," I murmured, though I suddenly found that I didn't really
mind.

Jacob's face turned serious. "Ness, if you want me to go, I'll leave. But will you
hear me out first?"

I wanted to remain indifferent and tell him I didn't want to listen. But then I
looked into Jake's eyes, and I saw something that made me pause. Even after
the accident he never looked like he did just now.

Jacob had fear in his eyes. He was scared…scared that I'd tell him to go away.
My heart melted a little against my will, and I felt myself nodding. Jacob visibly
relaxed, his shoulders dropping in relief.

He gave me a small smile before turning and looking out at the canal. "It's
funny…life, I mean. For so long, I thought I wanted something—something I
couldn't have. I fixated on it for years and it blinded me. I didn't realize that I
was holding onto something I didn't want anymore."

"Are you going to deny that you loved my mother?" I questioned coldly. He
glanced back at me, his expression sad.

"No, I'm not going to deny it," he admitted, ignoring my gasp of shock. "The
truth is I do love Bella. I always have, I always will."
He reached out and touched my cheek then, running his fingertips across my
skin. I stiffened and tried to pull away, but Jacob moved quickly, grabbing my
shoulders and giving me a little shake.

"That doesn't mean I'm in love with her, Ness. Sometimes I wonder if my
feelings for her were ever as deep as I thought they were."

"How can you say that?" I asked angrily. "Are you really so fucking fickle?"

Jake looks pained as he let me go, his hands dropping to his sides. He
continued on as if I hadn't just insulted him. "Loving Bella was a safe option for
me. I held onto what I thought was love for her, like a kid holds onto a security
blanket. If I loved Bella, I wouldn't be risking my heart on someone else. On
someone who could breakup with me. On someone who could leave me or die."

He frowned, lost in thought. I wondered what he was thinking about. Was he

thinking about my mom who dumped him for another man? Perhaps his mother
who he lost at such a young age. Or maybe he was thinking about his poor son
who never had a chance at life. Jake's face lightened as he turned his gaze
back to me, his lips tugging into a smile. My mother's voice echoed in my mind.

The one beacon of light in Jacob's darkness has always been you, even when
you were just a kid... you always had a way to reach him and make him
smile….he needs you, Nessie.

I slowly smiled back at him. I get it now, Mom. I heard Jake's breath catch as he
lifted his hands and cupped my cheeks.

"So there I was, secure in the knowledge that my heart was safe. And then you
happened," he murmured. "I saw you in that goddamn purple dress on your
twentieth birthday, looking so beautiful and vulnerable, and that was it. My
safety net was ripped away from me, and for the first time in my life I was in
love…really in love. Not that I wanted to acknowledge it. Up until the accident
happened, I even pretended that it was Bella I still wanted. I kept telling
myself, this is Nessie—this is your god-daughter. She's too young and full of life
to be with a cynical fuck-up like you. But nothing I told myself mattered. From
the moment I saw you at that party, you've been it for me."

"How do I know I'm not a substitute for my mother?" I whispered my worst fear.

Jacob moved so that his forehead was resting against mine. "Don't you get it?
She was a substitute for you. The truth is, I forgot all about Bella the moment
you re-entered my life. I love you, Renesmee. If I had someway of knowing
what you would mean to me one day—some magical sign telling me that you
were my soul mate—I would have lived my life very differently. But I can't
change the past. All I can ask is that you find a way to forgive me."
He pulled his head back so that he could look at me. "Give me another chance
to show you how much I love you…please."

He held himself stiffly, as though already anticipating my rejection. Yet it still

didn't stop him from pleading, his eyes desperate. In that moment, I realized
the past didn't matter anymore. My dad was right. Jacob might have loved my
mom a long time ago, but he loved me now. And that was all that mattered.

"Jacob," I finally said, feeling relieved that I could accept his love again. I closed
the distance between us and wrapped my arms around his waist. His arms
instantly embraced me, holding me to him as though he'd never let me go.

"I love you," he told me, burying his face in my hair. "I love you so much."

"I love you, too," I told him softly and felt his body shudder in response.

"My angel," he murmured.

"What?" I pulled back to look at him. Jacob leaned down and lightly kissed the
tip of my nose.

"When I was injured," he explained, "I heard someone next to my bed, pleading
for me to wake up. That was you, wasn't it?"

"Yes," I admitted.

Jake shook his head in disbelief. "All this time my angel was with me. You saved
me, Nessie."

"You saved yourself," I responded.

He gave me a mock frown. "Don't argue with me, woman. I'm trying to be
romantic here."

"Sorry," I said with a grin which he responded to with one of his own. He pulled
my hands from around his waist and held them in his.

"It started with these," he told me, bringing my one hand to his mouth and
kissing the back of it before doing the same to the other. "You have healing
hands, do you know that? When I was unconscious in the hospital, I remember
the feel of them on me. They felt so soft and comforting as you held my hand. I
never wanted you to let me go. Then after we started our physical therapy
sessions and I'd have spasms, you'd massage my back, always knowing how to
make me feel better. I used to think your hands were magical. You made the
pain go away."

His voice was gruff with emotion when he added, "I wouldn't be standing here
today if it weren't for you. Your determination to get me to walk again...your
constant hope and encouragement…I became addicted to it. You gave me
something to fight for. Even after you left me, I was determined to get back on
my feet for you. But even if I never walked again, it wouldn't have mattered
because of you. You gave me my life back."

I was going to deny my role in his recovery, but I never got the chance. Jacob
bent down and kissed my lips. Our mouths fused together hungrily, reuniting
after so long apart. A cat call ringing through the air made us break away from
each other, like two kids caught making out in the hallway by the school
principal. We laughed shamefacedly as we looked at each other. Jake reached
out and ran his thumb across my bottom lip.

"Nessie," he whispered tenderly. "You've given me so much. I just wish there

was something I could give you in return."

"Actually, you already did," I murmured as he began to kiss the shell of my ear.

"Hmm?"

"I was thinking just this morning I needed to return to Washington," I told him.

Jake nodded as he pulled away from me, his hand going to the back of my neck
to massage it. "I half expected you to come home before now. As it is, you're
going to be behind in your classes."

"Well…that's the thing. I'm not sure if I'll be going back to school anytime
soon."

"What?" Jake said sternly. "That's ridiculous. Ness, you're too good at your job
to throw your career away—"

I covered his mouth with my hand before he could go into full lecture mode.
"Jake, I'm pregnant."

He was about to pull my hand away when he froze, my words slow to register.

"What'd you say?" he asked, his voice muffled against my hand. I removed it
and looked at him, glowing.

"I'm pregnant. We're going to have a baby. I took a pregnancy test this
morning and it came back positive."

"Yeah?" he asked in shock. "But I…we used protection."

My face blushed as I thought back to the week long orgy of sexual delight we'd
had before I left. "We did use protection…with the exception of that first time."

"The penthouse patio," Jacob confirmed, his eyes widening.

"Yep," I replied.

"A baby," he said, his voice suddenly filled with wonderment. Maybe it was the
Italian sunlight playing tricks on me, but I thought I saw moisture in Jake's eyes
as his hand went to my flat stomach, caressing the area where his child rested
inside me.

He bent down and lightly brushed my lips with his, whispering, "thank you."

He repeated that word to me seven and a half months later when I gave birth
to our beautiful, healthy baby boy, Jonathan Jacob. J.J. quickly stole both of our
hearts, along with the hearts of his grandparents, godparents Seth and Jenny,
and anyone else who laid eyes on him. He was so easy to love, especially as he
was a little miniature of his proud father.

It had been a whirlwind several months before the birth of our son. Jacob and I
married in Venice before we returned home. We immediately moved into our
new penthouse in Seattle. As a wedding present, Jacob hired world-renowned
interior designer Demetri Tracker to help with decorating our place. Demetri
was a force to be reckoned with. He had the penthouse in move-in condition
within no time.

Neither Jacob nor I wanted a nanny to raise our child, so Jake decided to work
from home and stay with J.J., giving me the opportunity to attend classes and
continue with my education. It was just one of the endless gestures of love my
husband did for me. Every day he showed me in a hundred different ways how
much he loved me.

And every day I was reminded how lucky I truly was. I had everything I ever
wanted because of Jake. For years—ever since I fell in love with him when I was
just a little girl—I had felt an uneasy restlessness, as though I were seeking
something that was always out of my grasp. Now…all I felt was peace.

Jacob might have thought I healed him, but he was wrong.

We had healed each other.

THE END