Bonding & attachment issues

In comparison to all other animals, human infants are born at a time of incredible vulnerability,
when they are totally dependant on others meeting their needs. This vulnerability is, in part, an
evolutionary trade-off. Human infants, and the infants of other primates, have a much larger brain
in relation to body size than the young of all other mammals. Human adults also have a much
smaller pelvis than our evolutionary ancestors due to us walking upright on two legs. The
combination of these two factors means that the human infant has to be born at a much earlier
stage of his developmental process in order to be able to pass safely through his mother’s pelvis

As a consequence of this, human infants are unable to care directly for themselves and to meet
their own primary needs. Because they require the longest period of care, protection and nurturing
of any other species, there needs to be a way in which their parents feel motivated enough to
expend the time, energy and effort required to look after them. How then, does the vulnerable
newborn infant ensure his survival? The way this is done is through highly specific behaviours that
enable both the baby and his parents to fall in love with each other and develop a bond that
endures for life.

The Sensitive Period

Most people will be much more familiar with the term bonding than they are with attachment. Both
of these terms have been used extensively for several decades to describe the way in which the
intimate relationship between a baby and its parents develops. Bonding can be defined as the
earliest connections that exist between a mother and her baby throughout the prenatal period to
the time immediately following birth. Attachment can be defined as the relational process that
develops from after the bonding period through the first three years of childhood, by which time it is
considered to be fully hardwired into the brain.

In 1976, paediatricians Marshall Klaus and John Kennell published a ground-breaking book entitled
Parent-Infant Bonding. In this, and later publications, they document the existence of a "sensitive
period" of approximately 30-60 minutes that exists immediately after birth during which the
potential for early maternal-infant bonding is at its optimum. They showed that if a baby is left
undisturbed in skin to skin contact with its mother, rather than immediately taken away for
cleaning, weighing, testing etc., he can slowly begin to adjust to life outside the womb and develop
a more intimate relationship with both of his parents in his own time.

Following birth, the way in which a healthy bond is developed is through the daily interactions that
the infant has with his caregivers. Simple behaviours such as eye contact, gentle touching, smiling
and rocking are essential components in this process. In order for an infant to develop a sense of
security in his relationships, his needs need to be met consistently by a loving, reliable and sensitive
caregiver. The following list indicates a number of attributes associated with healthy bonding.

Symptoms of healthy bonding

• Good sense of self-worth

• Independent and autonomous
• Resilient in the face of adversity
• Ability to manage impulses and feelings in a healthy way
• Ability to maintain long-term friendships
• Good relationships with parents, caregivers and other authority figures
• Trust, intimacy and affection
• Empathy, compassion and clear conscience
• Good behaviour and academic success at school

The bonding & attachment process affects us in every aspect of our lives, including our physical,
neurological, emotional, psychological, social and spiritual development. It becomes the basis for
our development of trust, sense of self-worth and ultimately shapes how we relate to the world and
other people.
Bonding & Attachment issues

When this process is interrupted, or does not occur at all, infants and children can develop specific
problems in one or more of these areas. These can manifest as behavioural, emotional and learning
difficulties as well as possible developmental delays. The degree of disturbance can vary from quite
mild to severe.

Potential causes of disturbed bonding & attachment:

• Prenatal causes – including unwanted pregnancies, in utero drug and alcohol exposure as well as
violence, illness and extreme or prolonged stress during pregnancy.
• Premature birth and/or other significant birth trauma
• Maternal post-natal depression.
• Early hospitalisation
• Separation from a primary carer
• Adoption
• Frequent moves and/or placements
• Insensitive parenting that lacks respect, discipline, consistency and sensitivity
• Abuse
• Neglect
potensial Penyebab mengganggu mengikat& pemasangan:

o penyebab Sebelum melahirkan- termasuk kehamilan tak dikehendaki, dari kandungan ekspose
alkohol dan obat/racun seperti halnya kekerasan/kehebatan, penyakit dan ekstrim atau
memperpanjang tekanan selama kehamilan.
o kelahiran Prematur dan/atau trauma kelahiran penting lain
o Maternal post-natal tekanan.
o Awal hospitalisasi
o Separasi dari suatu utama [kereta;mobil]
o Adopsi
o penempatan dan/atau gerak Sering
o orangtua Tidak dapat merasakan yang kekurangan rasa hormat, disiplin, kepekaan dan
konsistensi
o Sakititi
o Lalaikan
It used to be thought that if the bonding-attachment process was interrupted, or even did not
happen at all, then there was no way in which it could be changed. However, it is now recognised
that the brain is highly plastic and continues to change and adapt to new situations and
circumstances throughout life. This means that, with the appropriate therapeutic care and support,
a child who did not have a secure early attachment experience can begin to re-pattern this process
in a more positive direction. Positive re-patterning of early bonding-attachment issues can also
occur in teenagers and adults.

In many cases, families who have children with compromised bonding and attachment find that they
become overwhelmed due to the extreme nature of the children’s behaviour. Traditional parenting
techniques do not work with these children and so it is important that parents are able to find the
support they need in order to help them cope. This often needs to be a combination of appropriate
therapy for the child along with the parents learning effective therapeutic parenting skills.

Further details on bonding and attachment can be found in the article Understanding Attachment

© Graham Kennedy 2006