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There is increasing evidence 18, recalls how shocking it can be when seen
for the first time. "Porn can spread around
that children regard online so easily. In Year 11, we sent videos around
pornography as a way of using our mobile phones and you'd look at
learning about sex and it and wonder how anyone could do some
relationships. But, says Sara of the things - the fact that young kids can
get hands on that footage is worrying."
Parker, some teachers are Rebecca Avery, e-safety officer at
reluctant to tackle the issue Kent County Council, is concerned that
youngsters are using pornography as a

W
hen he was 11, Max used to source of information and education. "It's
sneak into his mother's bedroom easy for their perception of what is normal
when she was out and use her to get warped if they have no comparison
computer to Google words such as other than what they've seen on the
"cock and boobs". What he discovered internet or mates have loaded on to their
was a world of web-based pornography, mobile. We've got to teach them to be safe
which he admits gave him unrealistic and discuss with them what they've seen."
expectations of sex and relationships. She has found that even primary pupils
"I was at that 'in-betweeny' stage have accessed pornography, sometimes by
between innocence and maturity," says using the history on their parents' laptop
Max, now 18. "Watching porn gave me a or, as in the case of one nine-year-old, by
grand idea of what sex is. I thought, This working out the password to crack the
is going to be brilliant', that I would be parental controls on the home computer.
sitting there eating a pizza and some girl At this age there can also be an element
would come in and have sex with me. of bravado or cyber bullying.
"Obviously, that's completely unrealistic "Sometimes they may get sent a link to
because the first time it's a bit stiff and something nasty or they'll be dared by a
rookie and very brief. But you've got to mate to type 'sex' into the search engine,"
learn about sex from somewhere and for she says. "If you type in anything to do
me it was from friends and the internet." with porn, it will come looking for you."
It is hard to know how many teenagers As one of the first local authority
regularly watch internet porn, but the e-safety officers in the UK, Ms Avery runs
technology is moving so fast that many training courses for teachers and others
adults find it impossible to keep up with working in schools, as well as providing
computer-savvy youngsters who can often education for parents and pupils.
get around parental controls and share She would like the issues of porn and
pornography on their mobile phones. social networking sites to be built into sex
Even hardcore and "special-interest" and relationships education as a matter of
pornography is accessible. Damien, now course, but she says some reachers are ..

26 TES MAGAZINE I OCTOB ER 2010


wary of such discussions, preferring to
wait until individual pupils raise them.
Watching porn gave authority to appoint an e-safety officer.
The girls were targeted by a 21-year-old
She also finds that parents are often in me a grand idea of man in Canada, who has since been
denial, refusing to accept that their convicted and sentenced to three years'
teenage child is accessing pornography or what sex is. I thought I imprisonment for extortion, blackmail
using their mobile phone to share sexually would be sitting there and creating indecent images.
explicit images. Ms Gillings believes there is huge
"No one likes to think of their child eating pizza and some pressure on young people to appear
watching pornography," she says. "The
biggest problem with the internet is that
girl would come in and sexually available, not only from their peer
group but from an increasingly sexualised
children and teenagers don't feel they can have sex with me celebrity culture. She says: "It only takes a
tell anyone if they see something they Max, 18 celebrity to say they go on a site such as
shouldn't. Their assumption is the Chatroulette for youngsters to go on that
computer or mobile will be taken away they can lie, so can the other people site in the hope of meeting that celebrity."
from them. Parents often feel their children they meet online," says Ms Avery. . Ms Avery has come across youngsters
are safer on the computer because they're And much of this is hidden from both organising Chatroulette parties. Intended
at home - that may not be the case." teachers and parents. "There's loads of to be a harmless random communication
That it may not be the case has things adults don't know about," says using webcam, the site was soon taken up
prompted many schools in Kent to take Jemima, 14. "I've had friends who've met by people masturbating or performing
up the e-safety training and support on up with older guys they've met online and other sexual acts in front of the camera.
offer, while pupils are encouraged to someone was asked to send pictures of She says that when youngsters stumble
report anything online that makes them herself topless - she didn't because she across such images, it difficult for them
feel threatened or uncomfortable. didn 't want to embarrass herself, but she not to watch, even though it is real people

A
t one primary, this open-door carried on talking to him." doing real things in their front room.
policy led a 10-year-old girl to Another teenager tells how a 15-year­ "It's what I call the 'car crash effect'," she
report an online friendship which old girl in her school was videoed by her says. '''1 can't believe "vhat I am watching'
immediately rang alarm bells with head boyfriend having sex and the footage was - so they keep on watching."
Richard Sutton Smith. "They were asking Bluetoothed around his whole year. "She A lot of pornography holds similar
to meet her," he says. "It may have been put a brave face on it although she was fascination for sexually curious teenagers,
innocent but we informed the police and obviously very distressed. 1 don't think even when it is accidentally accessed or
told the girl to reply saying she wanted her parents or teachers knew," she says. unsolicited. One 14-year-old girl kept on
nothing more to do with the contact, who These are the kind of stories Vicky being sent pop-ups and links to porn sites
started sending emails with explicit Gillings, of the Child Exploitation and by another pupil during their MSN
content. Online Protection Centre (CEOP), hears conversations. "It was horrible and you
"Unfortunately, there were 11 or so daily. As a policing authority funded by can't get rid of those images," says the
other girls in the online friendship group the Government, it receives more than girl, now 18.
who were also flooded with something 6,000 reports of online abuse a year, some While the assumption is that it is mainly
like 20 links to explicit sites," he says. directly from children, others from boys who are consumers of pornography,
Mr Sutton Smith copied all the paref\ts parents, teachers or other professionals. girls are by no means aloof from it all, even
into the exchanges. "1 knew that none of Every day, the centre has at least four if they see it as "a bit of a giggle",
them would be aware that their child was cases on which it must take immediate something to add spice to a sleepover.
gaining access to that sort of stuff simply action because a child is at such severe "I remember when 1 first saw porn at
by trying to have friends," he adds. risk, either from a possible sex offender one of my friend's sleepovers and we were
When it comes to the Pandora's box or because the situation has become so just looking it up for a joke," says one 17­
of internet porn, Ms Avery finds that bad that they are threatening suicide. year-old girl. ''There was about 20 of us
older boys are more likely to push the "Children and teenagers are vulnerable and literally you can just type in anything
boundaries, while girls tend to sign up on online," Ms Gillings says "They often and see all kinds of porn. We were just
social-networking sites. Age restrictions don't realise the risks of sharing sexually messing around, but if you watch it when
seem to pose few barriers. Parents may provocative images that can do the boys are about they often try to lad it up
give in to the pressure of the "all my rounds, be manipulated and end up on and it's just embarrassing."
friends are doing it" argument and sign up a paedophile website. She went on to watch more
their children to sites such as Facebook "They are open to blackmail and pornography with her gay best friend. "We
even though they are under age - Facebook coercion. They may be told that if they were lying on his bed when he asked me if
has a lower-age limit of 13. She even came don't do something, their account will be 1 wanted to watch gay porn - and 1 said
across a four-year-old on Facebook, signed deleted or their profile page hacked into. yes," she says. "1 find it quite interesting,
up by his 10-year-old brother, who in turn The screen and keyboard give an illusion the different categories. Some can be sexy
had been registered by his parents. of safety and anonymity, but there are but some are ridiculous. I've been shocked
Many free pornography websites only hugely powerful grooming techniques by sadist pornography and 1 did see some
require children and teenagers to tick a that can sexualise or normalise what this men cut their girlfriends, but the more you
box to say they are over 18. Even where child is being asked to do." watch it the less shocking it becomes - the
they have to complete a form to register, In Kent, it was an incident in which human brain can only maintain the shock
they can lie. girls were asked to pose online for sexually factor for a couple of seconds."
"We mUSt make them realise that if explicit images that prompted the local Psychosexual therapist Dr Frances

28 TES MAGAZINE 1 OCTOBER 201 0


pornography for young people is that
they will see the other person as an
exciting object to be discarded once
they cease to be exciting. And when it
comes to choosing a partner, you have a
shopping list of what they should be like,
what they should do or not do."
But one I8-year-old, who is now in a
steady relationship, believes his exposure
to pornography has improved his sex life.
"You want to experiment with things­
different positions, different types of oral
sex," he says. "When you see bondage and
that sort of stuff, you think T d never do
it' because it looks like it's hurting, but
when you're having sex you may try
different things like pulling your partner's
hair to see if it does turn you on, if it
spices things up or not."
Dr Emeleus is concerned that some girls
are now being asked to do things during
sex with which they are uncomfortable.
"Sexual experimentation between young
people has been going on for ever, but
there's something about the extreme
images which is disturbing," she says.
"Learning about them is one thing, but
ramping it up to avoid dealing with the
issues of relationships and needing the buzz
of that excitement is not a safe way to go."
The proliferation of internet pornography
may also be behind the rise in the number
of girls as young as 13 coming to health
professionals having had anal sex as a way
of avoiding getting pregnant.
Simon Blake, chief executive of sexual
health charity Brook, says anal sex is seen as
less intimate than oral sex. "It's a cultural
problem that we don't talk to young
people about sex in ways in which they
can protect themselves early on," he says.
He believes pornography can create
feelings of inadequacy around body
image. Brook has also seen girls who are
worried about having pubic hair after
seeing waxed porn actresses. For boys, the
feelings of inadequacy often revolve
around penis size.
Mr Blake would like to see more
It's easy for their Emeleus, who has worked with
youngsters addicted to pornography, is
age-appropriate sex and relationships
education from primary school onwards.
perception of what concerned that such desensitisation can "We've got to start talking about the way
is nonnal to get normalise extreme sexual behaviour as
well as leading to unrealistic expectations
the body works from early on so we can
discuss the gritty issues later," he says.
warped if they have no of themselves and their partner. "We've got to help young people
She is concerned that repeated exposure understand that pornography isn't real
comparison other than to sex at a young age can lead to "a split life. It is a horrible way of boys learning
what they have seen between feeling and excitement". about sex which objectifies women a lot of
"When there is no feeling, the the time - and can be very frightening."
on the internet or on pornographic image has to escalate to
their mobile fill the whole sexual field and produce
the same hit of excitement," she says.
• Sara Parker is the producer of'Sex, Pom and
Teenagers ', a documentary to be broadcast on
Rebecca Avery, Kent County Council "The danger of repeated exposure to BBe Radio 4 on Monday, October 4 at 8pm

1 OCTOBER 2010 TESMAGAllNE 29

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