Friendships

By Richard Church

Friends are very important in our lives. Friendships are easily formed when we are young
and do not demand too much out of it. According to studies and research, humans tend to
form highest number of friendships at kindergarten and primary level. However, one tends to
have less friends as one grows older and wiser. This is because we realize there are good
friends and bad ones.

The saying that a friend in need is a friend indeed is very apt in this scenario because good
friends are those who are reliable and trustworthy. at a younger age, our demands are not
too high regarding friendships as we rely mostly on our parents, siblings and relatives for
important things. The friends we formed at this age are merely considered playmates rather
than companions and confidants. Thus, our expectations of them are not high.

More serious friendships are formed when one enters puberty and achieves certain level of
maturity. the latter allows one to forge fellowship with those who share the same interests,
passion as well as similar moral and religious values. Thus, it is not surprising to observe that
in some Asian country, mature students at the upper secondary level have friends of the
same ethnic and religious backgrounds. At the university level, it is even more apparent.
Even the Ministry of education has voiced concern over this phenomenon where polarization
is prominent. The Indians, Chinese and Malays hardly mix with each other and are seen
usually in the company of their own kind.

One of the main reasons for polarization among university students is that as they reach a
certain level of maturity, common binding factors such as religion, customs and traditions
play important role in selection of friends or mates. In addition, since majority of these
students come from rural backgrounds where there is not much cultural interchange, they
feel rather awkward to forge friendships with students of other races. However, this does not
mean the students are racist or suffer from superiority complex. Thus, the university should
introduce more programs that allow cultural and religious mixing and understanding of the
other.

Nevertheless, in the working world, a different scenario prevails. One finds Indians, Chinese
and other races forging stable and long lasting friendships. This is most probably due o the
fact that to be productive in one's work, one has to believe in team work. The latter actually
enhances the bond between the workers and eventually long lasting friendships are formed.
In fact, this situation has even led to many inter racial marriages between the three major
races. the products of the intermarriages are very unique as they have friends and relatives
from both ethnic backgrounds.