BICOL COLLEGE

Daraga, Albay
Graduate School

“PSYCHOLOGY OF RELATIONSHIP
MANAGEMENT”

Narrative Report

JESSE ALLAN S. GO
Student # 201501628
March 10, 2018
Psychology of Relationship Management
Topics
A. Stages of Relationship
B. Ten Tips for Healthy Relationships
C. Maintaining Healthy Relationship
D. Individual Differences
E. Types of Interpersonal Relationship
F. Impression Management

What is the definition of a True Relationship?

If you break down the word Re-la-tion-ship: Taking a journey on a ship with your
partner and learning how to relate to one another. It is a journey to relate or learn
from each other and from everything around you. You are taking this life journey
together, creating magic moments and working through the hard or tough times,
and most importantly growing stronger together. It is like you are consciousness
merging to become one - not just getting along
Definition: A relationship is a bond between two individual or more.

A. Stages of Relationship:
The Good Time: The role of the individual here is fairly straightforward – provide
a loving, attentive environment for one another where trust and communication are
vital factors.
The Bad Time: In this stage trust and communication breakdown. Now the role of
the middleperson change dramatically, their role is now to provide the “glue” in the
relationship.
The End Time: This is the end stage of relationship, if the Middleperson succeed
to maintain relationship then both individual move back to the first stage otherwise
relationship break.

B. Ten (10) Tips for Healthy Relationships

Healthy relationships bring happiness and health to our lives.
Studies show that people with healthy relationships really do have more happiness
and less stress.
There are basic ways to make relationships healthy, even though each one is
different…parents, siblings, friends, boyfriends, girlfriends, professors,
roommates, and classmates.
Here are Ten Tips for Healthy Relationships!
1. Keep expectations realistic. No one can be everything we might want
him or her to be. Sometimes people disappoint us. It’s not all-or-nothing, though.
Healthy relationships mean accepting people as they are and not trying to
change them!
2. Talk with each other. It can’t be said enough: communication is
essential in healthy relationships! It means—
· Genuinely listen. Don’t plan what to say next while you’re trying to listen.
Don’t interrupt.
· Listen with your ears and your heart. Sometimes people have emotional
messages to share and weave it into their words.
· Ask questions. Ask if you think you may have missed the point. Ask
friendly (and appropriate!) questions. Ask for opinions. Show your interest. Open
the communication door.
· Share information. Studies show that sharing information especially
helps relationships begin. Be generous in sharing yourself, but don’t overwhelm
others with too much too soon.
3. Be flexible. Most of us try to keep people and situations just the way we
like them to be. It’s natural to feel apprehensive, even sad or angry, when people
or things change and we’re not ready for it. Healthy relationships mean change
and growth are allowed!
4. Take care of you. You probably hope those around you like you so you
may try to please them. Don’t forget to please yourself. Healthy relationships are
mutual!
5. Be dependable. If you make plans with someone, follow through. If you
have an assignment deadline, meet it. If you take on a responsibility, complete it.
Healthy relationships are trustworthy!
6. Fight fair. Most relationships have some conflict. It only means you
disagree about something; it doesn’t have to mean you don’t like each other! When
you have a problem:
 · Negotiate a time to talk about it. Don’t have difficult conversations when
you are very angry or tired. Ask, "When is a good time to talk about
something that is bothering me?" Healthy relationships are based on
respect and have room for both.
· Don’t criticize. Attack the problem, not the other person. Open sensitive
conversations with "I" statements; talk about how you struggle with the
problem. Don’t open with "you" statements; avoid blaming the other person
for your thoughts and feelings. Healthy relationships don’t blame.
· Don’t assign feelings or motives. Let others speak for themselves.
Healthy relationships recognize each person’s right to explain themselves.
· Stay with the topic. Don’t use a current concern as a reason to jump into
everything that bothers you. Healthy relationships don’t use ammunition
from the past to fuel the present.
· Say, "I’m sorry" when you’re wrong. It goes a long way in making things
right again. Healthy relationships can admit mistakes.
Don’t assume things. When we feel close to someone it’s easy to think we
know how he or she thinks and feels. We can be very wrong! Healthy
relationships check things out.
· Ask for help if you need it. Talk with someone who can help you find
resolution—like your a counselor, a teacher, a minister or even parents.
Check campus resources like Counseling Services at 532-6927. Healthy
relationships aren’t afraid to ask for help.
· There may not be a resolved ending. Be prepared to compromise or to
disagree about some things. Healthy relationships don’t demand conformity
or perfect agreement.
· Don’t hold grudges. You don’t have to accept anything and everything,
but don’t hold grudges—they just drain your energy. Studies show that the
more we see the best in others, the better healthy relationships get. Healthy
relationships don’t hold on to past hurts and misunderstandings.
· The goal is for everyone to be a winner. Relationships with winners and
losers don’t last. Healthy relationships are between winners who seek
answers to problems together.
· You can leave a relationship. You can choose to move out of a
relationship. Studies tell us that loyalty is very important in good
relationships.
7. Show your warmth. Studies tell us warmth is highly valued by most
people in their relationships. Healthy relationships show emotional warmth!
 8. Keep your life balanced. Other people help make our lives satisfying
but they can’t create that satisfaction for us. Only you can fill your life. Don’t
overload on activities, but do use your time at college to try new things—clubs,
volunteering, lectures, projects. You’ll have more opportunities to meet people and
more to share with them. Healthy relationships aren’t dependent!
9. It’s a process. Sometimes it looks like everyone else on campus is
confident and connected. Actually, most people feel just like you feel, wondering
how to fit in and have good relationships. It takes time to meet people and get to
know them…so, make "small talk"… respond to others…smile…keep trying.
Healthy relationships can be learned and practiced and keep getting better!
10. Be yourself! It’s much easier and much more fun to be you than to
pretend to be something or someone else. Sooner or later, it catches up anyway.
Healthy relationships are made of real people, not images!

C. Maintaining Healthy Relationship:

Some other steps:
1. Speak a little less, listen a little more: Most people get tremendous
pleasure from speaking about themselves. But, here we have to be careful; if we
always speak about our achievements or tribulations, people will get fed up with
our egoism. If we are willing and able to listen to others, we will find it much
appreciated by our friends. Some people are not aware of how much they
dominate the conversation.
2. Which is more important being right or maintaining harmony?- A lot
of problems in relationships occur because we want to maintain our personal pride.
Don’t insist on always having the last word. Healthy relationships are not built
through winning meaningless arguments. Be willing to back down; most arguments
are not of critical importance anyway.
3. Avoid Gossip: If we value someone’s friendship we will not take
pleasure in commenting on their frequent failings. They will eventually hear about
it. But, whether we get found out or not, we weaken our relationships when we
dwell on negative qualities. Avoid gossiping about anybody; subconsciously we
don’t trust people who have a reputation for gossip.
4. Forgiveness: Real forgiveness also means that we are willing to forget
the experience. If we forgive one day, but then a few weeks later bring up the old
misdeed, this is not real forgiveness. When we make mistakes, just consider how
much we would appreciate others forgiving and forgetting.
5. Know When to Keep Silent: If you think a friend has a bad or
unworkable idea, don’t always argue against it; just keep silent and let them work
things out for themselves. It’s a mistake to always feel responsible for their actions.
You can offer support to friends, but you can’t live their life for them.
6. Right Motive: If you view friendship from the perspective of “what can I
get from this?” you are making a big mistake. This kind of relationship proves very
tentative. If you make friendships with the hope of some benefit, you will find that
people will have a similar attitude to you. This kind of friendship leads to insecurity
and jealousy. Furthermore, these fair weather friends will most likely disappear just
when you need them most. Don’t look upon friends with the perspective “what can
I get out of this?”. True friendship should be based on mutual support and good
will, irrespective of any personal gain.
7. Oneness: The real secret of healthy relationships is developing a feeling
of oneness. If you have a true feeling of oneness, you will find it difficult to do
anything that causes suffering to your friends. When there is a feeling of oneness,
your relationships will be free of jealousy and insecurity. For example, it is a feeling
of oneness which enables you to share in the success of your friends. To develop
oneness we have to let go of feelings of superiority and inferiority; good
relationships should not be based on a judgmental approach. In essence,
successful friendship depends on the golden rule: “do unto others as you would
have done to yourself.” This is the basis of healthy relationships.
8. Humor: Don’t take yourself too seriously. Be willing to laugh at yourself
and be self-deprecating. This does not mean we have to humiliate ourselves, far
from it — it just means we let go of our ego. Humor is often the best antidote for
relieving tense situations.

D. Individual Differences:
A learner's personal characteristics that can affect how he / she learns. Individual
differences are often explanations for differences in learning and performance
among learners. The ways in which people differ in their behavior, thinking,
working style, Attitude, values etc.
Bridging Individual Differences:
1. Perceived Interdependence
2. Shared goal
3. Sense of Crisis
4. Respect
5. Trust
E. Types of Interpersonal Relationship:
1. Family 2. Friends 3. Co-worker
4. Enemy 5. Teacher 6. Counselor
7. Mentor 8. Advisor etc

Categories of Personal Relationship:

1. Kinship Relationship: Which we got through genetically and marriage
like- Father, Mother, Father in Law, and Mother in Law etc.
2. Formalized relationship: for example, Boss, co-worker, doctor,
counselor etc.
3. Non-formalized relationship: friends, family member, boy friend, girl
friend etc.

G. Impression Management
Impression Management is the goal directed activity of controlling or
regulating information in order to influence the impression formed by an audience.
How to leave a positive impression:?
1. Eye Contact (70% to 80%)
2. A firm handshake
3. Smile on your face
4. Sit with your back straight
5. Never ever cross your legs or fold your arms.
6. Wear blue cloth, blue gives the impression of loyalty and respect.
7. Your tone of voice
8. Social skills