Professional Documents
Culture Documents
by Raymond Weisling
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by Pierre Abbat
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by Meaghan Desbiens
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Seth at Sainsbury's sells thick socks.
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Six sick hicks nick six slick bricks with picks and sticks.
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I wish to wish the wish you wish to wish, but if you wish the wish the
witch wishes, I won't wish the wish you wish to wish.
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Stupid superstition!
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Picky people pick Peter Pan Peanut-Butter, 'tis the peanut-butter picky
people pick.
from a commercial
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Luke's duck likes lakes. Luke Luck licks lakes. Luke's duck licks lakes.
Duck takes licks in lakes Luke Luck likes. Luke Luck takes licks in lakes
duck likes.
27
There those thousand thinkers were thinking how did the other three
thieves go through.
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Did Dick Pickens prick his pinkie pickling cheap cling peaches in an inch
of Pinch or framing his famed French finch photos?
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When you write copy you have the right to copyright the copy you
write. ...
continued here
45
A big black bug bit a big black dog on his big black nose!
by Kitty Morrow
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47
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Flash message!
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51
How many cookies could a good cook cook If a good cook could cook
cookies? A good cook could cook as much cookies as a good cook who
could cook cookies.
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How much pot, could a pot roast roast, if a pot roast could roast pot.
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56
Mr. Tongue Twister tried to train his tongue to twist and turn, and twit
an twat, to learn the letter ""T"".
57
Pete's pa pete poked to the pea patch to pick a peck of peas for the
poor pink pig in the pine hole pig-pen.
58
She saw Sherif's shoes on the sofa. But was she so sure she saw
Sherif's shoes on the sofa?
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Rory the warrior and Roger the worrier were reared wrongly in a rural
brewery.
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personal name
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I stood sadly on the silver steps of Burgess's fish sauce shop, mimicking
him hiccuping, and wildly welcoming him within.
81
When I was in Arkansas I saw a saw that could outsaw any other saw I
ever saw, saw. If you've got a saw that can outsaw the saw I saw saw
then I'd like to see your saw saw.
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90
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by Matt Duchnowski
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Rhys watched Ross switch his Irish wristwatch for a Swiss wristwatch.
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107
2 Y's U R.
2 Y's U B.
I C U R.
2 Y's 4 me!
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111
112
The ruddy widow really wants ripe watermelon and red roses when
winter arrives.
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114
Triple Dickle
a strong drink
115
How many sheets could a sheet slitter slit if a sheet slitter could slit
sheets?
116
Supposed to be pistachio,
supposed to be pistachio,
supposed to be pistachio.
by Diane Estep
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118
119
Argyle Gargoyle
120
Peggy Babcock
personal name
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122
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by Pierre Abbat
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125
Yally Bally had a jolly golliwog. Feeling folly, Yally Bally Bought his jolly
golli' a dollie made of holly! The golli', feeling jolly, named the holly
dollie, Polly. So Yally Bally's jolly golli's holly dollie Polly's also jolly!
126
Out in the pasture the nature watcher watches the catcher. While the
catcher watches the pitcher who pitches the balls. Whether the
temperature's up or whether the temperature's down, the nature
watcher, the catcher and the pitcher are always around. The pitcher
pitches, the catcher catches and the watcher watches. So whether the
temperature's rises or whether the temperature falls the nature watcher
just watches the catcher who's watching the pitcher who's watching the
balls.
by Sharon Johnson
127
128
John, where Peter had had ""had had"", had had ""had"";
""had had"" had had his master's approval.
129
from India
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132
133
by Pierre Abbat
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135
136
138
139
140
141
142
143
Roy Wayne
Roy Rogers
Roy Rash
personal names
144
Wunwun was a racehorse, Tutu was one too. Wunwun won one race,
Tutu won one too.
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146
147
Mo mi mo me send me a toe,
Me me mo mi get me a mole,
Mo mi mo me send me a toe,
Fe me mo mi get me a mole,
Mister kister feet so sweet,
Mister kister where will I eat !?
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As one black bug, bled blue, black blood. The other black bug bled blue.
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163
The owner of the inside inn was inside his inside inn with his inside
outside his inside inn.
164
If you notice this notice,
you will notice that this notice is not worth noticing.
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166
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places in Ohio
168
Chukotko-Kamchatkan
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177
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The seething sea ceaseth; thus the seething sea sufficeth us.
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186
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188
Swatch watch
189
Dr. Johnson and Mr. Johnson, after great consideration, came to the
conclusion that the Indian nation beyond the Indian Ocean is back in
education because the chief occupation is cultivation.
190
Round and round the rugged rock the ragged rascal ran.
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192
193
194
195
by Julia Dicum
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197
How may saws could a see-saw saw if a see-saw could saw saws?
by Jillian Goetz
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199
How much myrtle would a wood turtle hurdle if a wood turtle could
hurdle myrtle?
A wood turtle would hurdle as much myrtle as a wood turtle could
hurdle if a wood turtle could hurdle myrtle.
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205
206
207
208
209
211
212
213
214
215
This is a zither.
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219
Big black bugs bleed blue black blood but baby black bugs bleed blue
blood.
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221
difficult in Brazil
222
Come, come,
Stay calm, stay calm,
No need for alarm,
It only hums,
It doesn't harm.
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224
Red blood, green blood
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227
228
229
230
231
A lady sees a pot-mender at work at his barrow in the street.
""Are you copper-bottoming them, my man?""
""No, I'm aluminiuming 'em, Mum""
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240
Sweet sagacious Sally Sanders said she sure saw seven segregated
seaplanes sailing swiftly southward Saturday.
241
Betty Botter bought some butter but she said the butter's bitter. If I put
it in my batter it will make my batter bitter. So, she bought some better
butter, better than the bitter butter and she put it in her batter and her
batter was not bitter. So 'twas good that Betty Botter bought some
better butter.
242
How much oil boil can a gum boil boil if a gum boil can boil oil?
243
Good blood, bad blood, good blood, bad blood, good blood, bad blood.
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245
246
There are two minutes difference from four to two to two to two, from
two to two to two, too.
247
There once was a man who had a sister, his name was Mr. Fister. Mr.
Fister's sister sold sea shells by the sea shore. Mr. Fister didn't sell sea
shells, he sold silk sheets. Mr. Fister told his sister that he sold six silk
sheets to six shieks. The sister of Mr. Fister said I sold six shells to six
shieks too!
248
Sally sells sea shells by the sea shore. But if Sally sells sea shells by the
sea shore then where are the sea shells Sally sells?
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Knapsack strap.
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John, where Molly had had ""had"", had had ""had had"". ""Had had ""
had had the teachers approval
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How many yaks could a yak pack pack if a yak pack could pack yaks?
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277
Can you imagine an imaginary menagerie manager
imagining managing an imaginary menagerie?
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Betty Botter bought some butter but, said she, the butter's bitter.
If I put it in my batter, it will make my batter bitter.
But a bit of better butter will make my bitter batter better.
So she bought some better butter, better than the bitter butter,
put it in her bitter batter, made her bitter batter better.
So 'twas better Betty Botter bought some better butter.
284
A box of biscuits,
a box of mixed biscuits,
and a biscuit mixer.
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287
If two witches would watch two watches, which witch would watch
which watch?
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She sees seas slapping shores.
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by Ray Weisling
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Greek grapes.
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A flea and a fly in a flue,
were imprisoned. So what could they do?
Said the fly, ""Let us flee"".
Said the flea, ""Let us fly"".
So they flew through a flaw in the flue.
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313
Esau Wood sawed wood. All the wood Esau Wood saw, Esau Wood
would saw. All the wood Wood saw, Esau sought to saw. One day Esau
Wood's wood-saw would saw no wood. So Esau Wood sought a new
wood-saw. The new wood-saw would saw wood. Oh, the wood Esau
Wood would saw. Esau sought a saw that would saw wood as no other
wood-saw would saw. And Esau found a saw that would saw as no other
wood-saw would saw. And Esau Wood sawed wood.
314
Betty bought some bitter butter
and it made her batter bitter,
so Betty bought some better butter
to make her bitter batter better.
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by Pierre Abbat
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One black beetle bled only black blood, the other black beetle bled blue.
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Ed Nott was shot and Sam Shott was not. So it is better to be Shott
than Nott. Some say Nott was not shot. But Shott says he shot Nott.
Either the shot Shott shot at Nott was not shot, or Nott was shot. If the
shot Shott shot shot Nott, Nott was shot. But if the shot Shott shot shot
Shott, the shot was Shott, not Nott. However, the shot Shott shot shot
not Shott - but Nott. So, Ed Nott was shot and that's hot! Is it not?
324
We will learn why her lowly lone, worn yarn loom will rarely earn
immoral money.
by Ray Weisling
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Unique New York, unique New York, unique New York, ...
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Elmer Arnold
personal name
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A big black bug bit a big black bear and made the big black bear bleed
blood.
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I thought a thought.
But the thought I thought wasn't the thought I thought I thought.
If the thought I thought I thought had been the thought I thought,
I wouldn't have thought so much.
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The Leith police dismisseth us
They thought we sought to stay;
The Leith police dismisseth us
They thought we'd stay all day.
The Leith police dismisseth us,
We both sighed sighs apiece;
And the sighs that we sighed as we said goodbye
Were the size of the Leith police.
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Mares eat oats and does eat oats, but little lambs eat ivy.
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Courtney Dworkin
personal name
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She sells seashells on the seashore. The seashells she sells are
seashore seashells.
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Irish wristwatch
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My Friend Gladys
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The crow flew over the river with a lump of raw liver.
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Did Doug dig Dick's garden or did Dick dig Doug's garden?
by Paul Davies
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If a Hottentot taught a Hottentot tot to talk ere the tot could totter,
ought the Hottentot tot be taught to say ought or naught or what ought
to be taught 'er?
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How many cans can a canner can if a canner can can cans? A canner
can can as many cans as a canner can if a canner can can cans.
378
Which witch snitched the stitched switch for which the Swiss witch
wished?
by Ann Clark
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I wish to wish, I dream to dream, I try to try, and I live to live, and I'd
die to die, and I cry to cry but I dont know why.
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by Pierre Abbat
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389
Said to be a diction test for would-be radio announcers: To be read clearly, without
mistakes, in less than 20 seconds (from Coronet Magazine, August 1948).
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Kanta is a masai girl, she can tie a tie and untie a tie, if kanta can tie a
tie and untie a tie, why can't I tie a tie and untie a tie?
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Seven slick and sexy sealskin ski suits slid slowly down the slope.
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Fred Threlfall's thirty-five fine threads are finer threads than Fred
Threlfall's thirty-five thick threads.
by Anthony Nichols
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403
Two dozen double damask dinner napkins
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The cat crept into the crypt, crapped and crept out.
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Dear mother,
give your other udder
to my other brother.
406
Rough Translations
3.
Hard for PL/I compilers to understand. The key to understanding
this is that there is no lexical distinction between keywords (IF,
THEN, and ELSE) and variables, which can also be IF, THEN, and
ELSE. Likewise, there is no lexical distinction between testing for
equality ('=') and assignment ('='). So, this means: If the
variable IF is equal to the variable THEN, assign the variable
ELSE to the variable THEN, otherwise, assign the variable IF to
the variable ELSE. As with many tongue twisters in natural
languages, this is NOT good style.
107.
Too wise you are. Too wise you be. I see you are. Too wise for
me!
147.
(?)
336.
397.
name of a road in Batesville Arkansas
Thanks
I slit the sheet, the sheet I slit, and on the slitted sheet I sit.
Knapsack straps.
Inchworms itching.
Greek grapes.
Peggy Babcock.
Flash message!
Sixish.
Don't pamper damp scamp tramps that camp under ramp lamps.
I thought a thought.
But the thought I thought wasn't the thought
I thought I thought.
Betty and Bob brought back blue balloons from the big bazaar.
Pacific Lithograph.
Thank the other three brothers of their father's mother's brother's side.
Selfish shellfish.
They have left the thriftshop, and lost both their theatre tickets and the
volume of valuable licenses and coupons for free theatrical frills and thrills.
Of these, the Noun is the most important, as all the others are more or less dependent
upon it. A Noun signifies the name of any person, place or thing, in fact, anything of
which we can have either thought or idea.
There are two kinds of Nouns, Proper and Common. Common Nouns are names which
belong in common to a race or class, as man, city. Proper Nouns distinguish individual
members of a race or class as John, Philadelphia. In the former case man is a name which
belongs in common to the whole race of mankind, and city is also a name which is
common to all large centres of population, but John signifies a particular individual of the
race, while Philadelphia denotes a particular one from among the cities of the world.
Nouns are varied by Person, Number, Gender, and Case. Person is that relation existing
between the speaker, those addressed and the subject under consideration, whether by
discourse or correspondence. The Persons are First, Second and Third and they represent
respectively the speaker, the person addressed and the person or thing mentioned or under
consideration.
Number is the distinction of one from more than one. There are two numbers, singular
and plural; the singular denotes one, the plural two or more. The plural is generally
formed from the singular by the addition of s or es.
Gender has the same relation to nouns that sex has to individuals, but while there are only
two sexes, there are four genders, viz., masculine, feminine, neuter and common. The
masculine gender denotes all those of the male kind, the feminine gender all those of the
female kind, the neuter gender denotes inanimate things or whatever is without life, and
common gender is applied to animate beings, the sex of which for the time being is
indeterminable, such as fish, mouse, bird, etc. Sometimes things which are without life as
we conceive it and which, properly speaking, belong to the neuter gender, are, by a figure
of speech called Personification, changed into either the masculine or feminine gender,
as, for instance, we say of the sun, He is rising; of the moon, She is setting.
Case is the relation one noun bears to another or to a verb or to a preposition. There are
three cases, the Nominative, the Possessive and the Objective. The nominative is the
subject of which we are speaking or the agent which directs the action of the verb; the
possessive case denotes possession, while the objective indicates the person or thing
which is affected by the action of the verb.
An Article is a word placed before a noun to show whether the latter is used in a
particular or general sense. There are but two articles, a or an and the.
An Adjective is a word which qualifies a noun, that is, which shows some distinguishing
mark or characteristic belonging to the noun.
DEFINITIONS
A Pronoun is a word used for or instead of a noun to keep us from repeating the same
noun too often. Pronouns, like nouns, have case, number, gender and person. There are
three kinds of pronouns, personal, relative and adjective.
A verb is a word which signifies action or the doing of something. A verb is inflected by
tense and mood and by number and person, though the latter two belong strictly to the
subject of the verb.
An adverb is a word which modifies a verb, an adjective and sometimes another adverb.
A preposition serves to connect words and to show the relation between the objects which
the words express.
A conjunction is a word which joins words, phrases, clauses and sentences together.
An interjection is a word which expresses surprise or some sudden emotion of the mind.
ENGLISH GRAMMAR IN A NUTSHELL
Nouns. These are words that name people, places, things, concepts, etc. More about
them in parts II and III.
Pronouns. These are basically placeholders for nouns in sentences. They function
grammatically just like nouns, but the things to which they refer are context-dependent.
They come in several flavors:
Personal Pronouns: I, we (1st person), you (2nd person), he, she, it, they (3rd
person).
Demonstrative Pronouns: this, that, these, those. (These words can also be used
as adjectives.)
Relative Pronouns: who, which, that, in phrases such as “the man who won” and
“the book that I read.”
Interrogative Pronouns: who, which, what used as question words, as in “Who is
she?” and “What do you want?”
There’s also the impersonal pronoun one, as in “One should get lots of sleep.”
Adjectives. These are words that modify nouns, such as small, red, and important. The
articles a, an, and the are a particular type of adjective; they’re essential in English, but
some languages (e.g., Hindi, Russian) get along without them.
Verbs. These are words that describe actions, states of being, etc. (The action can be
abstract as well as physical, as in the word “describe” in the previous sentence.) More
about them in parts II and III.
Adverbs. These are words that modify words other than nouns. Usually they modify
verbs, adjectives, or other adverbs, as the word “completely” does in these sentences:
I agree completely. (modifies the verb “agree”)
Completely happy people are rare. (modifies the adjective “happy”)
It was completely badly done. (modifies the adverb “badly”)
Occasionally they can modify other parts of speech:
He is really into Indian music. (“really” modifies the preposition “into”)
Many adjectives can be made into adverbs by adding –ly: complete, completely.
Prepositions. These are words such as in, on, for, by, with, from, to, about, etc. A
preposition is followed by a noun or pronoun (perhaps with modifiers) called its object.
The unit formed by a preposition and its object (with modifiers) is called a prepositional
phrase. Prepositional phrases modify other words in the sentence, that is, they function
as adjectives and adverbs. For example, “in the big room” is a prepositional phrase that
can be used as follows:
The table in the big room is round. (modifies the noun “table”)
He stood in the big room. (modifies the verb “stood”)
Conjunctions. These are words such as and, but, or, because, although, etc., that join
words or parts of sentences. Some words can be used as either prepositions or
conjunctions, such as after:
I went home after lunch. (preposition)
I went home after I ate lunch. (conjunction joining two clauses)
Interjections. These are words such as oh, well, alas, etc., that can be stuck into a
sentence but are structurally separate from the rest of the sentence.
Inflection is the general term for changing the form of a word depending on how
it functions in the sentence --- for example, adding –s to a noun to make it plural, or
adding –ed to a verb to make the past tense. Inflection in English is a relatively simple
matter; many languages employ much more elaborate inflections than English does.
Inflection of nouns, pronouns, and (in some languages, but not English) adjectives
is called declension. (The verb corresponding to “declension” is decline.) Declension is
a matter of number, gender, and case.
Number: Singular and plural. Most nouns form the plural by adding –s, but there
are exceptions (e.g., mouse, mice).
Gender: The only place where gender rears its ugly head in English grammar is in
the third person singular pronouns: he (masculine), she (feminine), and it (neuter).
Case: English has three cases: nominative, objective, and possessive. The
nominative is used for the subject of a sentence; the objective is used for objects of verbs
and prepositions; the possessive is used to indicate possession. English makes no
distinction between nominative and objective for nouns, only for some of the personal
pronouns and the relative or interrogative pronoun who:
Nominative: I, we, you, he, she, it, they, who
Objective: me, us, you, him, her, it, them, whom
The possessive case for nouns is formed by adding an apostrophe-s (or just an apostrophe
for plurals that already end in –s): Joan’s, students’. Pronouns have distinct possessive
forms:
Possessive: my, our, your, his, her, its, their, whose
(Footnote: The pronoun you is grammatically plural, although it can refer to just
one person. English also has a second person singular pronoun, but it dropped out of
common usage about 300 years ago: thou (nominative), thee (objective), and thy
(possessive).)
Inflection of verbs (for tense, mood, person, number, gender, etc.) is called
conjugation. Most English verbs have at most four distinct inflected forms besides the
root form (the form you look up in a dictionary). For the verb speak they are:
speak (root form and present tense, except 3rd person singular)
speaks (present tense, 3rd person singular)
spoke (past tense)
spoken (past participle)
speaking (present participle)
The big exception is the verb to be, which has three forms in the present tense (am, is,
are) and two in the past tense (was, were) as well as the participles been and being and
the root form be. The majority of English verbs form both the past tense and the past
participle by adding –d or –ed. (I deliberately chose an example where these forms are
different.) All English verbs form the present participle by adding –ing to the root form.
The past participle serves two functions: It is used in forming the perfect tenses
(see below), and it can be used as an adjective (e.g., the spoken word). The present
participle also has two functions: It is used in forming the progressive tenses (see
below), and it can be used as an adjective (e.g., a growing boy, the shining light). The
form of the present participle can also be used as a noun (e.g., “Reading is fun”), but
when so used, it is properly called the gerund.
While we’re at it, let’s mention the infinitive, which is formed by prefixing the
word “to” to the root form: to speak. The infinitive functions as a noun in sentences; for
example, in “I like to swim,” “to swim” is the direct object of “like.”
But inflection is only the beginning of the story of verb forms in English, which
has a complex and subtle system of verb tenses. This is a complicated subject, and I’m
just going to talk about the basics here. Most of the work is done by auxiliary verbs such
as be, have, and will.
There are three simple tenses:
Present: I speak
Past: I spoke
Future: I will speak (or shall speak)
There are also three perfect tenses, formed by the past participle with the auxiliary have:
Present perfect: I have spoken
Past perfect or pluperfect: I had spoken
Future perfect: I will have spoken
Each of these six tenses also has a progressive form, formed by the present participle
with the auxiliary be:
Present progressive: I am speaking
Past progressive: I was speaking
Future progressive: I will be speaking
Present perfect progressive: I have been speaking
Past perfect progressive: I had been speaking
Future perfect progressive: I will have been speaking
There are at least three other forms that function as distinct tenses, although they don’t
have standard names:
I am going to speak
I am about to speak
I used to speak
Then there are the conditional and quasi-subjunctive tenses formed with the auxiliary
verbs may, might, would. But now we’re getting into questions of mood rather than
tense --- I don’t want to go there right now.
A couple of other things to end this discussion before it gets too involved. The
present and past tenses have emphatic forms, formed with the auxiliary do:
I do speak, I did speak.
And transitive verbs can also be used in either the active or passive voice:
Newton discovered the formula. (active construction)
The formula was discovered by Newton. (passive construction)