Primer on Coaching and

Mentoring

PG page 1
 Objectives

• Understand the similarities and differences

between Coaching and Mentoring.
• Establish a coaching relationship using the
five-step preparation process.
• Plan a coaching session.
• Identify ways to establish a mentor and a
mentee relationship with others.
 What is Coaching?

• The sharing of knowledge, experience,

and ideas.
• A means for gaining understanding.
• Assisting another in reaching their goals
and objectives.
• Focusing more on people than on tasks.
 What is not Coaching?

• Behavioral feedback
• Manipulation
• Direction and supervision
• Providing (all) the answers
 Why Coach or be Coached?

• To take advantage of personal strengths

• To overcome weaknesses in skill set
• To learn new skills for the current job
• To gain new competencies to handle new
responsibilities
• To improve sense of personal
responsibility
• To enhance self-motivation
 Coaching Can Be…

• Spontaneous
• Scheduled
• Formal
• Informal
• Situational
• On-going

Important: Recognize the “teachable” moment

 Are You Ready to Coach?

• Coaching is about:
– The right reasons
– The right mindset
– The right preparation
– The right approach
 The Coaching Structure

• Active Listening
– At the base of interpersonal communication.
• Feedback
– The embedding of Active Listening as the last
step in a process that creates an opportunity for
improvement.
• Coaching
– A specific form of Feedback that stresses (among
other things) the building of agreements.
Establishing the Coaching Relationship:
The 5-Step Coaching Process

1. Observe (don’t act without the facts)

2. Document (in order to clarify
observations)
3. Propose (possible reasons for behaviors)
4. Test (the proposed hypotheses)
5. Discuss (your observations and thoughts)
 Step 1: Observe

• You need to understand the situation.

• You need to understand the individuals
involved.
• In other words, you have to observe and
listen.
 Step 2: Document

• Answer the following questions (in writing)

as accurately and precisely as possible:
– What actions are being done effectively?
– What actions are not being done effectively?
– Is the individual’s actions affecting the team in
reaching its goals and objectives?
– How are other team members reacting to the
individual’s actions?
 Think Non-Judgmentally

• This is not an requirement not to use your

judgment!
• It is a warning not to jump to conclusions,
especially before you have all the facts.
– Early in this process, it helps tremendously to
focus on actions you are observing.
– Don’t focus on what you “think” the causes of
those actions are, focus instead on facts.
 Non-Judgmental Example
• “David is rude and overbearing – he only
wants to listen to his own ideas.”

vs.

• “During team meetings, David frequently

interrupts other team members and talks,
rather than listens, the majority of the
time.”
 Step 3: Propose

• Consider what you have observed.

• Think about multiple reasons for the
behaviors you observed
– Write these down.
– Are there ways to test these “hypotheses”?
 Step 4: Test

• Test your proposed hypotheses.

• Continue to observe the individual in various
situations.
• Where appropriate, speak with others to
garner other opinions.
• Keep in mind your own motivations and
biases
– Don’t project
– Don’t be self-serving
• Are you part of the problem???
 You
• Are you being unrealistic about expected
performance?
• How are you feeling towards the individual?
– Frustrated
– Angry
• Are you really listening to them, or just going
through the motions?
• Are you giving positive feedback when they
demonstrate progress?
 Step 5: Discuss

• Discuss what you have observed with the

individual
– Don’t lecture
– Ask for feedback
– Keep in mind the feedback model
• Here is what I observed (as factually as possible)
• Here is my feeling concerning that observation
• This is what I think the consequence is of the
observed behavior*
• Actively listen to the response**
 Looking Forward

* The consequence should be the

suggestion that you and the individual
enter into a coaching relationship.

** The discussion may also include

“negotiation” as to goals, objectives, plans,
and actions.
- important for establishing buy-in
 Success

• Success depends more on attitude and

approach, more than technique
– If your motives are suspect, even the best
techniques are not going to make the
coaching work.
– If your motives are good but your technique
isn’t perfect, the coachee will forgive you.
What is the Difference Between
Coaching and Mentoring?
 Mentoring

• Developmental Relationship
– More experienced person helps guide a less
experienced one
– Ongoing relationship
• Learning
• Challenging
• Communications
 Types of Mentoring

• “Mosaic” approach
– Cheerleader
– Coach
– Confidant
– Counselor
– Patron
– Role model
– Can you think of others?
 Mentoring can be …
• Directive – transfer of knowledge and wisdom
– Advantages
• Experience, hindsight, provided with solution
– Disadvantages
• Less committed
• Non-Directive – helps mentee form their own
solution
– Advantages
• Buy-in, no need for mentor to be expert
– Disadvantages
• Longer time, may not have experience to form
 5 Myths of Mentoring

• Mentoring is the same as coaching

• Mentors should choose their mentees
• Mentoring is a formal relationship
• Consult with only one mentor at a time
• Mentors do not need mentors
Mentoring is the Same as Coaching
• Have many features in common
– Unlike coaching which can be a sporadic or
even one-time encounter, Mentoring assumes
an ongoing relationship.
– While coaching is often performed to help
correct an issue, Mentoring can be used to
support:
• Work
• Career
• Professional Development
 Identify a Mentor

• Someone who:
– Enjoys helping others
– Has requisite experience
– Is successful in your area of interest
 Approach the Mentor
• Easier if you already know them personally
– Schedule a meeting
– Meet over a cup of coffee
– Discuss a particular issue
– Keep the meeting short
– Let the relationship grow organically
• More difficult if you do not
– Ask a mutual acquaintance to introduce you
(consider using LinkedIn)
– Bold approach is to contact them directly
– Follow coffee/meeting approach above
 Making the Most of Mentorship

• Mentor’s time is valuable

• Before meetings with your mentor:
– Plan out goals for the conversation
– Prepare questions you want to ask
– OK to go off-topic, but hit all of the prepared
questions
Summary: Coaching and Mentoring
• Both Coaching and Mentoring take advantage of
basic communications skills such as Active
Listening.
• Although good Coaching and Mentoring may look
effortless, both require developing different skill
sets so that they can be done effectively.
• Using the coaching model can help you apply it
quickly and effectively.
• Establishing a mentor and a mentee relationship
with others is a great strategy for career
development.