Posted originally on the Archive of Our Own at

http://download.archiveofourown.org/works/11311416.

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Archive Warning: No Archive Warnings Apply
Category: M/M
Fandom: D.Gray-man
Relationship: Kanda Yuu/Allen Walker
Character: Allen Walker, Kanda Yuu, Lavi (D.Gray-man), Lenalee Lee
Additional Tags: Ensemble Cast
Stats: Published: 2017-06-26 Words: 3221

Like an Optical Illusion

by zovinar

Summary

Now you see it, now you dont.

Its not like they should have seen this coming or should have known. Its just that when it
was going on, they shouldve actually noticed.

Notes

See the end of the work for notes

Lavi probably wasn't the first to know, but he may have been the first to figure out that something
was happening. He did have a good vantage point after all. Despite how many people like Allen,
most wouldn't risk sitting next to him in the dining hall. And its not just because their meal might
end up being devoured in Allens mad quest to eat as much as possible at once.

Lavi watches dispassionately as Kanda stomps over, shoves a researcher out of his seat, then drop
his food down with a huff.

Honestly, Lujun should have know better. The only time Kanda doesn't sit at the end of a table is
when he has one all to himself. Also, hes recently picked up the habit of sitting across from Allen
so that they can bitch at each other.

God Kanda, why do you have to be an ass at every conceivable moment.

Oh, silly Allen. Kanda never answers questions he doesnt want to.

If you dont clean up your disengagement pattern, youre gonna fall on your face and I will laugh
over your corpse. Normally that would be a blatant lie, but Kanda has actually been known to
laugh at other peoples pain. Occasionally.

Oh but Kanda, wouldnt you catch me? Allen simpers. I'm sure that the only reason youd do
so would be to sate your enormous ego, but I still have faith in you.

Kanda snorts. Right. If youre actually stupid enough to get your sword stuck in an akuma, you
deserve it.

Its so nice to know that you care. Allens smile is sickly sweet.

Kanda hates sweets. He kicks Allen under the table.

Ouch, fuck. Youre such a dick.

Everyone knows you dont fucking let go of your weapon in a fight except you. And yours is
your fucking arm. Kanda shoots him a nasty look in between bites. Only youre stupid enough
to lose track of something that's supposed to be attached to you. He points his chopsticks across
the table for emphasis, Imbecile.

Allen just rolls his eyes. Like I havent seen you chuck Mugen across a battlefield before.

Kanda slams a hand down on the table and starts to yell, startling Lavi out of his light doze.

Hes had a night ok? His mission with Kory and Lenalee didnt get in until practically morning
and he kinda wants to go back to bed. Listening to these two argue like theyre about to go for
each others throats (as per usual) does get the adrenaline kicking, but not quite enough for him to
keep up.

He thinks the current thread is something about the difference between doing things for shits and
giggles and a practiced maneuver? Yeah, that sounds enough like something Kanda usually yells
at Allen about. A lot.

You know, most people in the Order have this odd notion that Kanda hates talking, would rather
ignore you than not. Which, ok Lavill give them that, hed probably rather ignore you, but thats
not because he doesnt want to talk; its because he doesnt care. Kandas perfectly willing to go
on and on listing all your character flaws and how much he thinks youre an idiot at great length
and volume when youre short, aggravating, and actually able to make conversation with him
without shitting your pants.

S probably why he got on so well with Lena.

He pays for drifting off again when Allen elbows Lavi in the face as he waves his arms in
exasperation.

Right! Right, exactly, Im absolutely sure that in my great incompetence Ill die far sooner than
you ever will! Ouch Allen.

Kanda throws his chopsticks at Allens face.

You have the communication skills of a five-year-old!

Id be more fucking offended if everything you said wasnt a pile of garbage. Are you even
capable of having a conversation without bullshitting someone at least once?

Im gonna beat the God damned piss outta you next time n rub your face n the dirt! Allens
getting really red in the face now. Cmon Sprout, gotta watch that blood pressure.
Kanda leans forwards and snarls. Why dont you put your money where your mouth is
beansprout.

And then both of them freeze. Allens face slowly lights up with undisguised glee while Kanda
looks more and more like hes just stabbed himself in the foot.

Shit.

Kanda vaults over the table, lands, and sprints out of the hall at full speed.

Allen cackles and steals Kandas unfinished soba. When he strolls off, hes still grinning.

Lavi blinks at the two empty seats.

Huh.

None of the finders ever use a training room if Allen and Kanda are in it; they dont even go near
it. There is, in fact, a highly sophisticated and efficient chain of communication that they use to
avert any accidental incidents. The last time someone was unlucky enough to happen upon them,
they ended up with 180 pounds of pissed off exorcist being kicked into them. And a fractured
skull.

Actually, the only person who ever voluntarily interrupts one of their sessions is Lenalee because
shes a crazy person. The science department and half of the exorcists would never believe it, but
the finders actually go on missions with her. They know.

Recently, theyve really tightened up their network. No one wants to end up in one of those
rooms.

Lenalee blinks. Shed just come down to the medical ward to pick up some papers for Koumi; she
hadnt expected this.

Allen, are you ok?

He looks up from where he been glaring at the wall and Lenalee sees his hands are tucked up
against the side of the bed and

Are those handcuffs?

Allen looks extremely indignant. No, he hisses, puffing up like an irate pigeon, he just took
one of those metal bars and wrapped it around my wrists.

I see. And why would Kanda do that?

His face goes through a few nasty expressions before he grinds out, he says I need bed rest so Ill
be less useless.
Lenalee furrows her brow and steps further into the room to rest a hand on Allens knee. Did
something happen?

He hedges before mumbling, I may have bruised a few ribs.

Allen.

A pause then, some of them might be fractured, he admits.

Allen!

Its not like its that bad! And you know theres not much they can really do about cracked ribs
anyway!

I think, Lenalee huffs, then straightens and shuffles the papers in her hands, he might have a
point this time. It may be for the best if you get some rest. She gives him a warm smile before
turning to leave.

Wait, Lenahey!

Something smashes up against the walls hard enough to shake them.

Link checks his watch.

The tremors break off to be replaced by a screech, then muffled swearing.

Its not exactly in his assignment to leave Walker unattended for any length of time, but Link had
judged that directly supervising his and Kandas spars was neither necessary nor good for his own
health.

The finders have fervently recommended that he wait outside and Link had decided to take their
advice. Besides, hes quite sure that Kanda would take just about any excuse to injure him in some
way.

The door suddenly flies open, bounces off the wall, and almost shuts of its own accord. Link,
delicately so as to not further damage the hinges, pulls the door back open to glance inside.

Walker has a smear of blood on his face from a cut in his lip and he's covered in scrapes and has
finger shaped bruises on his neck. A grappling match today then.

He also, as usual, looks unbearably smug. I think we're done for today! He chirps as he skips
over. Link has learned to distrust that look.

He raises an eyebrow, Isn't it a tad earlier than usu

ing bitch! Oh, it looks like he did cut it a bit short.

Walker seems to almost glow as he makes a show of tossing his hair over his shoulder.

Feel free to swing by when you can finally fucking stand!

Walker beams at Link and kicks the door shut after him. We should run.
They do.

Now that theyre hooked up to the Ark, the Asia Branch sees many more exorcists come through
its doors. Still, the habit of welcoming any visitors is a hard one to breakthe turnout to meet
Walker after his mission is more of a welcoming party than anything else. Bak learns that day how
much of his staff has spent any time at all at the European Branch.

When Walker almost falls through the doorway, barely catching himself before shooting a
poisonous glare at the Ark, a number of people take a generous step back. When Kanda steps
through and punches Allen Walker straight in the mouth, those people leave. The general outcry
from everyone else is startled and loud, researchers surging forwards to try and intervene. Bak sort
of wants to cry.

The next time you try something like that Im gonna cut off your legs.

Walker seems more concerned about making sure all his teeth are intact than with the homicidal
exorcist with a sword.

What was even the point of doing that you little shit, what were you thinking? I told you to watch
your fucking disengagement sequence moron!

Yeah, Bak can definitely tell who has any experience with this kind of thing. Most people look
downright appalled at the sight of the two of them. Not to say that the exorcists arent an even
more distressing sight to look at than usual, though.

Walkers right shoulder is an angry, swollen red and there are puckered abrasions and bruises all
along his ribs, all of which is pretty evident as most of his uniform on that side looks like its
melted off. Hes also missing most of his left boot and his jacket which, while present, seems more
scorched than not. Kandas not much better, his uniform is in what could be generously called
tatters around his waist and everything below is drenched in blood. Which is probably because it
looks like someone actually tried to cut him in half. Hes leaving red smears behind him because
the area over his hip is still gushing a little.

To top all of that, Kandas yelling down at Walker, whos currently sitting on the ground and
spitting up a mouthful of blood, looking murderous. Bak can understand why this is pretty
upsetting to most of his branch. The floor may never be the same.

Youre goddamn lucky you didnt rip your fucking arm straight off! Dipshit, why the fuck would
you exacerbate an injury like

Fuck off.

What.

Walker surges forwards. I said. Fuck. Off. He snarls straight in Kandas face; one hand (the left
one Bak notes) fisted in Kandas collar.

Kanda headbutts him. Using the space when he stumbles back, Kanda knees Walker in the
diaphragm then sweeps his legs out from under him, sending him crashing to the floor.
Kanda steps over Walkers body on his way out of the room. Make sure you drug the dumbass
when you fix his shoulder. He doesnt even spare a glance behind him as he stomps off.

Even Lo Fwa and the others, who would usually be the first to help, are keeping their distance;
uncertain if they should offer assistance or get the hell out while they still can. Bak understands.
The sewage pouring out of Allen Walker's mouth right now is terrifyingly impressive.

When he finally does track Kanda down, Bak finds him with medicalwhich is beyond
surprising, hes actually letting the staff bandage him up a bit. What isnt is that he seems to only
be allowing the nurse to suture the gash over his hip so he can list off every injury Walker
acquired on their last mission as some form of retribution for slights committed.

Seriously, make sure you sedate him when relocating his shoulder. Hes gonna cry like a baby
because he wouldn't let me do it yesterday. Fucker.

(He goes to see Walker after he wakes up. When Bak mentions what Kanda said, Walker makes a
face like a wet cat.

He sat on me and told me to not to be a bitch so I kicked him in the face. If he'd actually
said anything about my shoulder, maybe I would have let him help.)

Are you sure thats what you want? Jerrys used to Allens habits by now but this is pretty odd.

Yes, ten orders please.

Jerry peers at him, a finger tapping on his chin. I thought you werent exactly fond of soba Allen.
Especially, ah, not this much.

Allen smiles with a satisfied look. Kanda, he relishes over the word, is currently being bullied
by Head Nurse because he has bruised kidneys, several crushed fingers, and a broken collarbone.
He smiles to himself, I, on the other hand, will be sitting on the other side of the room and
enjoying a delicious meal; keeping him company like a good friend. The last part is delivered
with the deliberate emphasis of gleeful spite.

Oh this wont end well.

Allen, please see sense, Jerry hopes, are you absolutely sure thats a good idea?

Yes, very much so. He looks far too pleased in spite of the absolute chaos this is bound to lead
to.

Okay Allen

Jerry throws in an extra pair of chopsticks for Kanda because he knows better than to fight the
inevitable.
s dick so hard.

Lenalee looks kind of pained. Admittedly, Kanda might not actually use his dick for much but
Lavis pretty sure hed still beat the shit outta Allen if he did anything to it. Whatever's going on
over there is a disaster waiting to happen.

Hed come over mainly because hed wanted the gossip and everyone knows better than to go
after Kanda when he's done something as dramatic as kick Allen through a bench. And a table.

Anyway, Lavi's starting to regret it because Allen has a blissed out look that usually means candy
but here leans more towards pandemonium in the coming hours and no one being able to eat
dinner tonight.

Allen calls it divine retribution. Kanda calls it petty. The rest of them call it terrifying and try not
to get involved. Lena used to call it flirting and laugh it off but these days she usually mutters
something about squabbles while looking sorta pissed.

Allen, the rest of us don't want to be involved in your spat. Oh yeah, that's the face.

If he's gonna pull this kinda thing in public, you can't blame me for collateral damage.

We both know Kanda doesn't solve problems with anything other than excessive violence, Allen.
Fix your goddamn shit and don't pull us in the middle of it.

Hmm. Lavi's just gonna leave.

Apparently, it doesn't help because two days later its Lavi who catches them in the hall because
the world hates him.

It was the low pitched hiss that caught his attention as he passed and, curious as ever, hed padded
over on quiet feet out of habit more than anything else.

Its not really a surprise to find Kanda and Allen having some kind of disagreement, but
something about it has Lavi frowning and keeping out of sight as he edges closer.

Theyre tucked in one of the corners where Kandas backed Allen into a wall, having a fierce but
quiet argument (for once) and Kanda hisses something as he rests a hand on Mugen for a moment,
then makes a cutting gesture. Allen rolls his shoulders in a languid shrug that leaves one shoulder
up and says something thats probably sarcastic, derisive, or both from the way Kanda growls and
steps in closer to loom even more.

None of thats anything new, but it rankles all the same. A charged feeling in the air and it pings
Lavis attention, the odd feeling getting stronger and more unsettling

Its just something in the way they were leaning into each other; Kanda wrapping a hand around
Allens neck, thumb pushing his chin upKanda wearing a stormy, intense expression thats not
quite ragenot really boxing Allen in but with a curve to his stance that screams trapped and
Allen with his palms against the wallnot bracing but not resting on it eithera sly look on his
face and a sharp smile with just a hint of smug that curls his lips, tilting his head then arching his
back ever so slightly as his chest pushes upand then some of Kandas hair trickles over his
shoulder to sway in between them and
Oh.

Oh no.

Oh fuck he needs to find Lena.

Kanda snatches the file out of Koumi's hand with a growl and twaps Allen upside the head with it
as he storms out. Allen, naturally, trips him and then shoves Kanda into the door. The resulting
scuffle somehow ends up with the both of them leaving the office with only a broken picture as a
casualty. Looks like the doorframe got off easy today.

Koumi takes a delicate sip from his mug. A bang and several thuds later it quiets down.

Reever taps the ash off of his cigarette. It's nice to see them getting along.

It'd been a deft move, but they'd both noticed Kanda fishing out the inventory lists, maps, and
transportation forms out from the briefing before he threw it at Allen. Personal reports, local notes,
additional background reading leaving the folder with enough heft to warrant Allen's shout.

A few minutes peace is all the time they have before Lavi bursts into the room. Ah, doorframe.
We hardly knew ye.

Who had money on sex!?

Koumi carefully sets down his mug, props his elbows on his desk, and clasps his hands.

Pardon? That is a very daunting question and Koumi is very uninclined to try and parse without
more information.

Shit, they were just here werent they? Oh God how did we not notice.

Miranda trails into the room listlessly. I was blind and now I see, she murmurs.

Look, wheres the betting roster for how Allen and Yuu were eventually gonna kill each other?
Lavis voice has a hysterical tinge to it near the end.

Ah. Hm.

The door bangs open again and person after person spills in; the crowd of people somewhere
between panicked and horrified. That is, all but Marie and Lenalee who seem to have been swept
up in the commotion. Marie looks bemused; Lenalee just looks bored.

Someone check the books!

Where's the ledger?

No way someone actually had odds on that.

The frantic voices swell in shrill denials and muffled prayers.

Its Johnny who finally digs it out, carrying the heavy tome of bets and rankings over like its the
 Grail itself. He reverently lays in on Koumis desk and begins to delicately page through, people
hovering over his shoulders with anxious trepidation.

When they finally find it, a hush falls over the crowd.

No is someone's aghast whisper.

Scrawled at the bottom of a page is a wager written in a careless yet elegant script.

They're gonna fuck and all of you will cry.

Cross

Pandemonium breaks loose.

End Notes

lmao yeah my other ship manifesto.

runs against my other work A Modest Proposal which is a very different take on this
shitshow of a ship.

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