Professional Documents
Culture Documents
for meaningful
results Asset-Building Tips,
Tools, and Activities
for Youth and Adults
Easy-to-Use
Handouts for
Mentors
Mentees
Parents
Program
Leaders
KRISTIE PROBST
mentoring
for
meaningful
results
Asset-Building Tips, Tools,
and Activities for Youth and Adults
KRISTIE PROBST
Mentoring for Meaningful Results: About Search Institute
Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and Activities for Youth and Adults Search Institute is an independent, nonprot, nonsectarian orga-
nization whose mission is to provide leadership, knowledge, and
By Kristie Probst resources to promote healthy children, youth, and communities.
Copyright 2006 by Search Institute The institute collaborates with others to promote long-term orga-
nizational and cultural change that supports its mission. For a free
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Search InstituteSM and Developmental AssetsTM
are trademarks of Search Institute.
About This Resource
The content of this resource was developed with input from indi-
viduals at Big Brothers Big Sisters of the Greater Twin Cities, Colby
Cares about Kids, Maine Mentoring Partnership, Mentoring Partner-
ship of Minnesota, Mentoring USA, MENTOR/National Mentoring
Partnership, and other organizations. Search Institute is grateful for
All rights reserved. No parts of this publication may be reproduced
insights from these valuable partners.
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5
DEVELOPMENTAL ASSETS: A POWERFUL TOOL FOR SHAPING
HIGH-QUALITY MENTORING PROGRAMS
The Developmental Assets framework began with a simple question: What is it that
young people need to grow up healthy? As Karen Pittman of The Forum for Youth
Investment suggests, we can understand healthy to mean not only as problem-free
as possible butmore importantfully prepared to be responsible and productive citi-
zens. Search Institutes list of 40 Developmental Assets describes positive skills, experi-
ences, and opportunities that help young people grow into caring, condent adults.
People have traditionally viewed youth-serving programs such as mentoring
programs in terms of their role in preventing and curtailing the potential problems
youth face. This has been particularly true for programs designed for older youth
and adolescents. A growing movement among researchers and those who work with
youth points to an expanded role for programs that serve youth in the out-of-school
hours. While embracing prevention and safety as vital aspects of a good mentoring
program, the positive youth development movement takes a more holistic view of
youth and the power of youth programs to ensure access to an interrelated range of
experiences, relationships, and skills all youth need to grow up healthy.
Since its founding in 1958, Search Institute has been a key agent in the positive
youth development movement. Individuals, organizations, and communities seek-
ing to implement a positive approach to raising competent and caring young people
have adopted the framework of 40 Developmental Assets. Because the Developmen-
tal Assets constitute a conceptual framework, any individual, program, organization,
or community can incorporate the concepts in shaping efforts to provide all youth
with the essential elements of healthy development.
In exploring the question of what youth need to grow up healthy, Search Institute
has done extensive research, reviewing more than 1,200 studies from major bodies
of literature, including prevention, resilience, and adolescent development, to iden-
tify what young people need to thrive. Institute researchers have documented that
young people who are healthy, whether they come from the poorest or the wealthiest
environments and from diverse ethnic and cultural groups, have certain meaningful
elements in their lives. Researchers identied eight categories that describe these
elements:
The solid presence of support from others;
A feeling of empowerment;
A clear understanding of boundaries and expectations;
Varied opportunities for constructive use of time;
A strong commitment to learning;
An appreciation of positive values;
Sound social competencies; and
A personal sense of positive identity.1, 2
6
Moreover, research conducted by Search Institute consistently shows that the
strengths described within these categories provide a solid foundation for positive
development and academic success, and that their presence helps protect youth
from engaging in risky behavior and promotes acting in productive ways. The insti-
tute identied 40 different components and gave the name Developmental Assets
to these building blocks of healthy youth development. The data consistently show
that the power of assets is cumulative: The more assets young people report experi-
encing, the more apt they are to succeed in school and live positive lives, and the less
likely they are to participate in high-risk behaviors such as drug use, violence, and
early sexual activity.
When adults make deliberate efforts to help young people increase the num-
ber and degree of Developmental Assets they experience in their lives, it is called
asset building. As mentoring programs strive to reduce risky behaviors and increase
positive outcomes for youth, asset building is a powerful approach for helping youth
acquire the skills and experiences they need. The Developmental Assets framework
and the asset-building approach have been used by hundreds of communities, as
well as numerous organizations and individuals, to identify assets they are already
building and where they might make changes in their work to provide a healthier,
more nurturing environment for young people. Mentoring programs can also use the
framework to bring out and support the best in the young people they serve.
The assets have slightly varied denitions for different age groups, and these are
shown on pages 811. As you read through the items that involve parents, you may
recognize that many young people experience parental relationships with grand-
parents, older siblings, or other family members. Review the lists and imagine for a
moment how many of the assets are or might be available to young people in your
mentoring program.
7
40 Developmental Assets for Middle Childhood
WITH DEFINITIONS (STUDENTS IN GRADES 46)
EXTERNAL ASSETS
10. SafetyChild feels safe at home, at school, 20. Time at HomeChild spends some time most
and in her or his neighborhood. days both in high-quality interaction with
parent(s) and doing things at home other than
watching TV or playing video games.
CONTINUES
8
40 Developmental Assets for Middle Childhood
WITH DEFINITIONS (STUDENTS IN GRADES 46)
INTERNAL ASSETS
Reprinted from Coming Into Their Own: How Developmental Assets Promote Positive Growth in Middle Childhood; copyright 2004 by Search Institute. Develop- 9
mental Assets are positive factors within young people, families, communities, schools, and other settings that research has found to be important in promoting
young peoples development. This handout may be reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses only (with this copyright line). From Mentoring for Meaning-
ful Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and Activities for Youth and Adults. Copyright 2006 by Search InstituteSM; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org.
40 Developmental Assets for Adolescents
WITH DEFINITIONS (STUDENTS IN GRADES 612)
EXTERNAL ASSETS
10. SafetyYoung person feels safe at home, 20. Time at HomeYoung person is out with
at school, and in the neighborhood. friends with nothing special to do two or
fewer nights per week.
CONTINUES
10
40 Developmental Assets for Adolescents
WITH DEFINITIONS (STUDENTS IN GRADES 612)
INTERNAL ASSETS
28. IntegrityYoung person acts on convictions 38. Self-EsteemYoung person reports having a
and stands up for her or his beliefs. high self-esteem.
29. HonestyYoung person tells the truth even 39. Sense of PurposeYoung person reports that
when it is not easy. my life has a purpose.
30. ResponsibilityYoung person accepts and 40. Positive View of Personal FutureYoung
takes personal responsibility. person is optimistic about her or his personal
future.
31. RestraintYoung person believes it is
important not to be sexually active or to
use alcohol or other drugs.
Reprinted from Developmental Assets: A Synthesis of the Scientic Research on Adolescent Development, 2d ed.; copyright 2004 by Search Institute. Develop- 11
mental Assets are positive factors within young people, families, communities, schools, and other settings that research has found to be important in promoting
young peoples development. This handout may be reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses only (with this copyright line). From Mentoring for Meaningful
Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and Activities for Youth and Adults. Copyright 2006 by Search InstituteSM; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org.
The Power of Assets
On one level, the 40 Developmental Assets represent common wisdom about the kinds of positive experiences
and characteristics that young people need and deserve. But their value extends further. Surveys of more than
2 million young people in grades 612 have shown that assets are powerful inuences on adolescent behavior.
(The numbers below reect 2003 data from 148,189 young people in 202 communities.) Regardless of gender,
ethnic heritage, economic situation, or geographic location, these assets both promote positive behaviors and
attitudes and help protect young people from many different problem behaviors.
88% 89%
87%
78% 76%
69%
66%
60% 54%
48% 48%
39%
34%
27%
19%
9%
62%
45%
38% 38%
34%
26%
18% 18% 23%
11% 11%
6% 6%
3% 1% 3%
12 Developmental Assets are positive factors within young people, families, communities, schools, and other settings that research has
found to be important in promoting young peoples development. This handout may be reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses
only (with this copyright line). From Mentoring for Meaningful Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and Activities for Youth and Adults.
Copyright 2006 by Search InstituteSM; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org.
In the survey ndings described above, young people reported experiencing, on aver-
age, only 19 of the 40 assets. Although it may not be likely that a young person would
possess all 40 assets, the fact that the average young person experiences fewer than
half should concern every community.
Mentoring programs are in an ideal position to help correct this imbalance,
because they can (and do!) provide the kinds of positive relationships, places, values,
and activities that build assets for and with young people. The Developmental Assets
framework can also enhance the efforts of programs to provide healthy, asset-rich,
nurturing environments for the youth they serve.
13
The asset framework emphasizes that strong relationships are essential for healthy,
productive lives and makes cultivating and promoting them a priority. Mentoring
programs, which are based on building relationships between mentors and mentees,
provide a prime opportunity to build assets.
The asset framework also acknowledges that everyone can build assets for and
with young people. Certainly, professional youth workers have a critical job and
make important contributions to the community. However, building assets within
a youth program or organization is not the job of youth workers alone. In a mentor-
ing program, mentorscaring adults who usually are not formally trained youth
development professionalsare in a unique position to provide opportunities for
young people to thrive. Just as important, mentees (youth who have mentors) them-
selves have a responsibility to foster a positive environment. Adults will benet from
embracing them as contributors, not just passive recipients. Families, too, play a
critical role in mentees experience of assets, not only through daily care and by set-
ting examples, but also through their support of mentors as an important part of a
childs life.
The asset framework thus gives a fresh way to assess what your program is doing,
what is effective, and what needs to be improved. Looking at your work through an
asset lens helps you see opportunities to do what you already do better and lends clar-
ity as you consider what you want to alter or enhance in your mentoring program.
14
This book is for anyone who is helping mentors and mentees build and sustain
meaningful, nurturing relationships, while also encouraging families of mentees to
support their childs relationship with their mentor. The ideas and advice compiled
in this book come from mentors, former mentors, and mentoring program profes-
sionals who have spent years supporting mentoring matches. Like you, all of these
contributors are keenly aware of two very important realities about mentoring:
At its best, a successful mentoring relationship can provide a young person with
critical support and opportunities for growth that he or she may not be receiving
in life. As professionals in the eld of mentoring, you are in a unique position to
work with mentors, mentees, and mentees families to help young people thrive.
Unsuccessful mentoring relationships can have distressing impacts on mentees
and their families.4 For this reason, it is crucial that mentoring professionals are
equipped with multiple tools to help relationships between mentors and mentees
succeed.
The research behind the Developmental Assets can also assist you in making the
case for your program and give leadership and staff a context for talking with com-
munity leaders and funders about what you do, why you do it, how your efforts are
effective, and why they matter. In addition, the framework uses a common language
that assures youth receive the asset message from everyone in your organization.
By examining the roles of program staff, mentors, mentees, and mentees fami-
lies, we see how each person can contribute to a successful mentoring relationship.
No doubt your program already has its own policies and practices; this is not a sug-
gestion to implement a new program. Instead, this book allows you to enhance the
good work you are already doing and to select the handouts that best serve the people
in your mentoring setting.
15
mentees are meeting outside of school, congregation, residential, or programmatic
settings. However, participants in all kinds of mentoring programsincluding those
with group mentors or teen mentors of younger kidswill nd helpful advice they
can adapt for their unique situations.
Although the handouts for mentors, mentees, and parents can be useful tools
for supporting mentoring relationships that are already active, nothing can replace
effective recruiting, screening, matching, training, and ongoing support from your
program as the primary means to ensure that a mentoring match has the strongest
chances of ourishing. The rst section of handouts in this resource offers program
leaders tools for establishing these effective up front infrastructures that position
a mentoring relationship for success. You may already have a solid process in place,
but this section can help inform and enhance your existing strategies.
MOVING FORWARD
Effective mentoring programs build a strong team composed of a mentor, mentee,
and the mentees family, with program staff offering coaching and support along the
way. The concepts and language of the Developmental Assets framework can make
mentors feel more equipped and empowered to make a difference. In addition, the
asset approach can help mentees understand the gifts and talents they have to offer
the world and help parents see easy, doable ways in which they can guide their chil-
dren toward a healthy future. For mentoring programs, the Developmental Assets
can provide the framework and language to unite the mentoring team around a truly
meaningful resulthelping young people thrive.
NOTES
1. Scales, Peter C., and Leffert, Nancy. (2004). Developmental Assets: A Synthesis of the Scientic Research
on Adolescent Development, 2d ed. (Minneapolis: Search Institute).
2. Scales, Peter C., Sesma, Arturo, Jr., and Bolstrom, Brent. (2004). Coming into Their Own: How Develop-
mental Assets Promote Positive Growth in Middle Childhood (Minneapolis: Search Institute).
3. Rhodes, J. E., Grossman, J. B., and Resch, N. L. (2000). Agents of Change: Pathways through Which
Mentoring Relationships Inuence Adolescents Academic Adjustment. Child Development, 71 (6),
16621671.
4. Grossman, J. B., and Rhodes, J. E. (2002). The Test of Time: Predictors and Effects of Duration in
Youth Mentoring Relationships. American Journal of Community Psychology, 30 (2), 199219.
16
HANDOUTS FOR
s a mentoring professional you know that These handouts are not recipes for an ideal
A your work, when done well, can make a pos- asset-building mentoring program. Rather, the
itive difference in the lives of young people, their ideas offered here can complement your current
families, and their mentors. But you may wonder: strategies and help you identify opportunities to
Are we doing enough? Could we do more to sup- incorporate the principles of asset building more
port effective mentoring experienceswithout intentionally. You may nd it helpful to start by
seeking additional funding or staff? asking yourself:
With any job, how you do the tasks is as impor-
tant as what you do. Being a mentoring program What are the best strengths I bring to my role in
provider is no different. The handouts in this sec- supporting mentormentee matches?
tion present a variety of ideas for how you can use In my role, how can I most effectively leverage
the Developmental Assets framework to examine those strengths in our mentoring organization?
your strengths and improve upon your existing How can other staff in our program share their
practices. This section begins with introductory talents as asset builders?
information about assets, then takes program pro-
viders from recruitment through match support, Understanding each persons role as an asset
showing how you can foster the development of builder will help your staff send consistent messages
caring, healthy, and responsible young people at to program participants. Once your staff learns to
every stage. By reminding your staff people to think unleash the power of this positive approach, youll
of each other, mentors, mentees, and the families be ready to continue your journey toward even
of mentees as members of the same team, you can more meaningful results for mentors, mentees,
begin to build the web of support that helps young and mentees families.
people thrive. Use these handouts to be sure your
staff learns how to purposefully integrate asset-
based strategies into your program.
17
FOR MENTORING PROGRAM PROVIDERS
What Are
Developmental Assets?
You have decided to work in mentoring at least in in their community, succeed in school, and main-
part because you want to make a positive difference tain good healthall outcomes we want for kids.
in the lives of young people. Whether you realize it Just as important, the more assets young people
or not, you are in a fantastic position to help young have, the more likely they are to resist risky behav-
people attain the experiences and qualities they ior, such as using alcohol or other drugs, skipping
need to be successful. Search Institute, a nonprot school, or ghting.
research organization based in Minneapolis, Minne- Assets dont just happen as part of growing
sota, uses a framework of 40 Developmental Assets up. They are built for and with children through
to describe what youth need to grow into caring, all of the caring relationships they have at home
responsible adults. (If you havent already received and in their communities. Family members, men-
a copy of the complete list, please visit www.search- tors, teachers, coaches, youth directors, neighbors,
institute.org/assets/assetlists to learn more.) and employers all have opportunities to help young
You can think about assets as nutrients that people be stronger.
are necessary for a child to grow a strong mind and The 40 assets are grouped into two main types:
character. Knowing more about Developmental external and internal assets. The external assets
Assets can equip you to build an even more mean- are the good qualities of life young people get
ingful mentoring program, because the list can from the world around them. The internal assets
help you give mentors tools and ideas for build- are the traits, behaviors, and values that help kids
ing on the strengths of mentees and helping them make positive choices and be better prepared for
overcome difculties. challenging situations. Internal assets are like the
Simply but powerfully, assets build the good internal compass that helps guide them. These two
stuff in kids and help them resist the bad stuff. types of assets are divided into eight categories of
Research has shown that the more assets young human development that make it easier to think
people have, the more likely they are to be leaders about activities to build them.
CONTINUES
18
WHAT ARE DEVELOPMENTAL ASSETS? 1
Developmental Assets are positive factors within young people, families, communities, schools, and other settings that research has found to be important in promoting 19
young peoples development. This handout may be reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses only (with this copyright line). From Mentoring for Meaningful
Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and Activities for Youth and Adults. Copyright 2006 by Search InstituteSM; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org.
FOR MENTORING PROGRAM PROVIDERS
An Asset-Building Checklist
for Mentoring Organizations
Think of Developmental Assets as salt in the ocean infused throughout a mentoring program. Use
or oxygen in blood. Asset-building opportunities this checklist to see how youre currently building
should permeate the life of a young person, and Developmental Assets and to identify areas you
likewise, the Developmental Assets need to be could strengthen.
SUPPORT
Does our program aim to be part of a larger
web of support that includes mentees families,
schools, and neighborhoods?
EMPOWERMENT
Does our training and recruitment process
reect that we appreciate young people
as valuable participants with something to
contribute, not just as needing our help?
CONTINUES
20
AN ASSET-BUILDING CHECKLIST FOR MENTORING ORGANIZATIONS 2
COMMITMENT TO LEARNING
Does our program motivate mentees to do well in school?
POSITIVE VALUES
Have we identied all the ways our programs may
affect or engage all young people, regardless of gender,
ability, race, ethnicity, culture, sexual orientation, or
socioeconomic status?
SOCIAL COMPETENCIES
Do we provide mentors and mentees with tools for
building strong, positive relationships?
POSITIVE IDENTITY
Do the adults in our program share power and work
with young people instead of doing things for them?
After you have completed this worksheet, use it as of opportunity? Which things are you unable to do,
a discussion starter. What are your current asset- given the structure, nature, or mission of your orga-
building strengths? How can you build on the things nization? How can this checklist help you in mak-
that are already working well? What are your areas ing plans and developing ways to act?
Developmental Assets are positive factors within young people, families, communities, schools, and other settings that research has found to be important in promoting 21
young peoples development. This handout may be reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses only (with this copyright line). From Mentoring for Meaningful
Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and Activities for Youth and Adults. Copyright 2006 by Search InstituteSM; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org.
FOR MENTORING PROGRAM PROVIDERS
AN ASSET-BUILDING
MENTORING MYTHS
APPROACH TO MENTORING
Mentors are substitute parents. Mentors and families are on the same team.
One caring adult is all a young person needs. Young people benet from positive relationships
with many caring adults.
Only formal, one-on-one mentoring matters. Effective mentoring can happen in both informal
and group settings.
All mentoring relationships are equal. Mentors and mentees can have even more meaning-
ful relationships by building assets together.
Its often unclear what actions and activities in The research-based framework names concrete
the program actually make a difference in the things the program can do to make a lasting
lives of youth. difference for youth.
Mentors are recruited to be saviors for youth Mentors are recruited to engage in positive
who are at risk. relationships with young people who have the
potential for great things.
Mentors are in charge of selecting activities to Mentors and mentees jointly select activities to
do with the mentee. do together.
Mentors give advice and build skills; mentees are Mentors help mentees see that they have gifts
recipients of their help. and talents to share with their mentors and their
community.
Families are only supercially involved in the Families are active partners in shaping the program
mentoring program and are consulted primarily and are supported by the program in their roles as
when behavioral issues arise. parents or caregivers.
The program operates as a separate entity with The program views itself as a part of a web of
little or no connection to other community community support for youth and is connected in
organizations and institutions serving youth formal and informal ways with other organizations
and their families. and institutions serving youth and their families.
22 Adapted from More Than Just a Place To Go: How Developmental Assets Can Strengthen Your Youth Program by Yvonne Pearson, Kristin Johnstad, and James Conway. Copyright
2004 by Search InstituteSM; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org. Developmental Assets are positive factors within young people, families, communities, schools, and other settings
that research has found to be important in promoting young peoples development. This handout may be reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses only (with this copyright line).
From Mentoring for Meaningful Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and Activities for Youth and Adults. Copyright 2006 by Search Institute; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org.
FOR MENTORING PROGRAM PROVIDERS
Incorporating Asset-Building
Strategies into Mentor Recruitment
Developmental Assets are positive factors within PRESENTATIONS
young people, families, schools, and other settings When making presentations to potential mentors,
that have been found to be important in promoting whether in a group setting or a one-on-one meeting,
young peoples development. Incorporating asset- remember to incorporate the following messages:
building language and principles into your mentor
recruitment process can help you frame the role of Think back on the adults outside your family
a mentor in a way that encourages potential men- who made a difference for you when you were
tors. Below are ways to consider using the concepts growing up. Who were those adults? What did
inherent in the Developmental Assets framework they do to make you feel special? Mentors need
to enhance your recruitment strategies. not have a degree in youth development to
make a difference. They just need to believe in
MARKETING the potential of a young person.
How you portray mentors and mentees in your pro- Relationships, not programs, build healthy
grams marketing can determine how people per- young people. Mentoring programs are about
ceive what mentors areand are not. Some hints: sparking and supporting relationships between
young people and adults.
When recruiting mentors, make sure to use
marketing materials and handouts that depict Remember that the little things are the big
young people with promise and potential, things. A mentor may never have a dramatic,
rather than just with problems that need xing. life-changing conversation with a young per-
son like you see in the movies. However, the
Portray mentors as friends and role models who accumulation of everyday interactionsdoing
can bring out the best in a young person, not as homework together, laughing over ice cream,
rescuers or problem xers. shooting hoops, or talking during a bus ride
Use images and anecdotes that reect men- gradually builds the foundation upon which
tors and mentees with diverse characteristics mentors can help young people thrive.
and experiences. Focus on positive possibilities All young people have the potential to grow,
rather than decits. and having a caring relationship with a nonfam-
ily adult is one key way young people nd the
means to ourish.
Mentees arent just recipients of mentors car-
ing and affection. They may have just as much
to offer and teach as adults do. Mentoring ben-
ets mentors as well as mentees.
Developmental Assets are positive factors within young people, families, communities, schools, and other settings that research has found to be important in promoting 23
young peoples development. This handout may be reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses only (with this copyright line). From Mentoring for Meaningful
Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and Activities for Youth and Adults. Copyright 2006 by Search InstituteSM; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org.
FOR MENTORING PROGRAM PROVIDERS
Incorporating Asset-Building
Strategies into Mentor Screening
Once you have recruited a potential mentor into the JOB DESCRIPTIONS
screening phase, the Developmental Assets frame- Give potential mentors a written description of the
work can act as a guide for getting to know more expectations your program has of mentors. Use the
about the potential mentors style for interacting asset categories in your descriptions.
with young people. Equally important, the way you
ask questions and present program requirements Provide support to mentees by being there
using the asset framework helps potential mentors during tough times and celebrating their
sense the kind of mentor you expect them to be. successes.
Below are some tips for ensuring that your mes- Empower mentees to be full partners in the
sage comes across. relationship by sharing responsibility for choos-
ing activities you do together.
INTERVIEWING Believe in young people and their ability to
Once a potential mentor has signed on to proceed make a difference in the world.
through the screening process, there are ways that Have high expectations for the behavior and
you can look for their existing asset-building ten- achievement of mentees. Set fair but clear
dencies and build on those strengths. In your inter- boundaries for how they should behave.
viewing of mentors, ask the following questions:
Engage mentees in a rich array of activities,
When you think of young people, what comes from just hanging out to trying creative new
to mind? (Look for people with a natural experiences.
tendency to view young people as having the
Foster mentees commitment to learning.
potential to succeed.)
Connect their real-world interests to academics.
What would you see as your role in the men-
Model positive values through your priorities
toring relationship? (Look for responses that
and choices.
indicate that this person would be open to both
supporting a young person and to growing as an Help mentees hone positive values and social
individual through the experience of mentor- competencies, such as honesty, integrity, and
ing. Too much emphasis on only one of these respecting people who are different from them.
interests could be problematic.) Be a trustworthy adult. Maintain condentiality
How do you currently interact with young whenever possible, and help mentees seek
people you encounter in your daily life? (Look outside help when necessary.
for people who say they try to say hello and Remind mentees of their purpose, worth,
engage in conversation with young people.) and promise.
24 Developmental Assets are positive factors within young people, families, communities, schools, and other settings that research has found to be important in promoting
young peoples development. This handout may be reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses only (with this copyright line). From Mentoring for Meaningful
Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and Activities for Youth and Adults. Copyright 2006 by Search InstituteSM; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org.
FOR MENTORING PROGRAM PROVIDERS
Incorporating Asset-Building
Strategies into Orientation and Training
Both mentors and mentees can benet when you the eight asset categories) as a series of topics
incorporate asset-building information, ideas, and for developing and providing ongoing training
strategies into orientations and ongoing trainings. and support opportunities with mentors and
Launching the mentoring relationship on the right mentees.
foot can help ensure the relationship is grounded in
an environment of thriving and growing, rather than ASSET-BUILDING ORIENTATION AND
one of bridging differences and problem solving. TRAINING FOR MENTEES
Obviously, a mentee orientation should help young
IN GENERAL people understand the nuts and bolts of a men-
Introduce the Developmental Assets framework toring relationship, such as who their mentors are,
during orientation sessions for mentors and what they can expect will happen during visits, and
mentees. Explain that good mentoring builds how often they will spend time with their mentors.
assets in young peopleand good mentoring The orientation is also a great opportunity to intro-
requires both mentors and mentees to under- duce mentees to the concept of Developmental
stand what they need to do to make the rela- Assets.
tionship a success. Below are some ideas for how to introduce
asset building to mentees:
Find ways to reinforce with both mentors and
mentees in ongoing training what asset build- During orientation, address the following topics
ing is (intentionally creating the opportunities with mentees:
and experiences described in the framework), My Mentors Role in My Life
why asset building matters (the more assets
What Are Developmental Assets?
young people have, the more likely they are
to grow into healthy, caring, and responsible Conversation Topics for Introducing
young adults), and how people build assets Yourselves
(through relationships with family, friends, Deeper Conversation Topics
and other caring adults). (See additional handouts in Mentoring for
If mentees and/or mentors are given orienta- Meaningful Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools,
tion in a group setting, use the activity called and Activities for Youth and Adults, copyright
Building a Web of Support at the end of this 2006, Search Institute.)
handout to demonstrate what asset building is. When talking to mentees about why they are
Consider using the Developmental Assets frame- enrolled in a mentoring program, give them the
work (either the individual assets themselves or following kinds of messages:
CONTINUES
25
INCORPORATING ASSET-BUILDING STRATEGIES INTO ORIENTATION AND TRAINING 6
CONTINUES
26
INCORPORATING ASSET-BUILDING STRATEGIES INTO ORIENTATION AND TRAINING 6
INSTRUCTIONS
1 Have your group stand or sit in a circle. Give one person a ball of yarn. Have that person
name one person who has supported her or him and describe how.
2 Ask that person to hold on to the end of the yarn and throw the rest of the ball to another
person in the circle.
3 The person who catches the ball of yarn then names a person who has supported her or
him and describes how, before holding on to the yarn at that point and throwing the ball to
someone else.
4 As the activity continues, a web will form that connects all the people in the circle. Make
sure everyone gets to participate at least once.
5 After a web has been spun and the people in the circle begin to run out of ideas, explain to
them that the ball represents young people and the crisscrossing yarn is the web of support
made up of all of the people mentioned and the asset-building actions they have taken.
6 Throw the ball into the web and encourage the group to move it around without letting it
slip through the gaps in the web. If the web cannot support the ball, continue adding to it until
the ball bounces easily without falling through.
Is it more important to you to have lots of different people who are supportive or
just a few who are very supportive? Why?
What happens when the gaps in our webs of support are too wide?
If someone you know seems to need more support, how would you suggest
that he or she nd it?
Adapted from Building Assets Together: 135 Group Activities for Helping Youth Succeed by Jolene L. Roehlkepartain. Copyright 1997 by Search Institute; 800-888-7828; 27
www.search-institute.org. Developmental Assets are positive factors within young people, families, communities, schools, and other settings that research has found to be
important in promoting young peoples development. This handout may be reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses only (with this copyright line). From Mentoring
for Meaningful Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and Activities for Youth and Adults. Copyright 2006 by Search InstituteSM; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org.
FOR MENTORING PROGRAM PROVIDERS
Incorporating Asset-Building
Strategies into Match Support
Whether or not the Developmental Assets were Never forget the power of afrmation. The
introduced directly to mentors and mentees in more mentors and mentees hear genuine praise
your program orientation, the framework can still for their efforts, the more motivated they will
provide matches with helpful guidance on where be to stick with the program during any tough
to focus their energy and how to approach issues times that may arise.
that arise. Ultimately, the Developmental Assets Remind mentors and mentees that no one is
serve as a strong reminder of why theyre in this expecting perfection. Rather, the hope is that
relationship in the rst place. mentees and mentors will put forth their best
There are plenty of ways you can intentionally efforts to reach out to each other, to model
incorporate asset-building advice and tips into your appropriate behavior, to admit when theyve
staffs match support efforts. Some ideas include: made a mistake, and to be willing to forgive.
Share handouts from Mentoring for Meaningful Use the Developmental Assets framework to
Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and Activities shape questions you have for mentees and
for Youth and Adults or other asset-building mentors during match support conversations.
materials to help mentors and mentees For example, to learn more about how mentors
think about situations from an asset-building provide support in the relationship, you could
perspective. ask the mentor, What strategies have you been
Remember that mentoring should be about using to show your mentee your support?
helping mentees be all they can be, rather than Mentees could be asked, When your mentor
about xing mentees problems. Focusing on shows that he or she supports you, how do you
whats right with a young person is key to how know it? What does he or she say or do?
you frame your support strategies.
28 Developmental Assets are positive factors within young people, families, communities, schools, and other settings that research has found to be important in promoting
young peoples development. This handout may be reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses only (with this copyright line). From Mentoring for Meaningful
Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and Activities for Youth and Adults. Copyright 2006 by Search InstituteSM; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org.
HANDOUTS FOR
MENTORS
eople unfamiliar with mentoring may will provide you with a rich supply of helpful tools
P assume that, as long as mentors care about to offer mentors as they learn about mentoring
their mentees and spend time with them, the rela- and encounter challenges. This section continues
tionship will yield positive outcomes for mentees. to use the Developmental Assets framework as a
As a mentoring professional, you know that men- lens through which to look at common mentoring
toring is much more complex than that. For exam- issues. The advice focuses not just on addressing
ple, how a mentor engages with her or his mentee problems but also on recognizing the mentors
is just as important as how often. Equipping men- many opportunities to foster mentee development
tors to build healthy relationships with mentees is in the process.
one of the most crucial roles you play as a program Chances are, you are already well aware of
provider. how valuable mentors can be as agents of positive
The following section gives mentors informa- youth development. Use this information to chan-
tion, tips, and concrete ideas for making the most nel their enthusiasm toward even more meaning-
of their time with their mentees. These handouts ful mentoring results.
29
FOR MENTORS
YOU ARE . . .
. . . a friend. Like peer friendships, mentors and mentees do things together that are fun and
engaging. They support each other both in good times and in tough times. They teach each
other. They help each other. Theyre honest with each other. And sometimes they have to have
hard conversations about concerns they have, asking the right questions at the right time. By
being a good listener and engaging in authentic conversations with your mentee, you are help-
ing her develop important life skills.
. . . a role model. You are expected to set a good example to the mentee for how to live your life.
This is not the same as being perfect. Rather, it is about acknowledging your imperfections and
sharing your strengths. It is also about advocating for your mentee when dangers to his physical
or emotional well-being are present.
. . . a condant. Building a close relationship with your mentee will help her build better relation-
ships with others in her life as well, such as parents and peers. In the process, your mentee may
tell you things she does not feel comfortable telling anyone else. Sometimes she may tell you
about her hopes, dreams, or insecurities. Other times she may reveal mistakes she has made.
Unless your mentee is in trouble and needs outside help, try to keep her private comments
between the two of you. Your role is to be supportive of your mentee as a person with potential,
regardless of the kinds of actions or attitudes she condes in you.
. . . a nurturer of possibilities. Your role is to see the gifts and strengths of your mentee and help
him ourish personally. You should help your mentee channel his gifts toward actions that make
him a resource to others in his family, neighborhood, school, or community.
CONTINUES
30
WHAT IS MY ROLE AS A MENTOR? 8
. . . a social worker or doctor. If your mentee tells you about experiences or health conditions
that concern you, always turn to the mentoring program staff for help. Although arming yourself
with information about, say, a learning disability or abuse may help you understand your mentee
better, it is not your responsibility to try to address conditions or situations that require profes-
sional help. The staff at the mentoring program may be able to nd additional help for the men-
tee, including local information and referral services.
. . . a savior. You should not see your role in this relationship as coming in to make a young
persons life better or to x his problems. Certainly your support can help your mentee over-
come hurdles. But dont forget that every young personregardless of his circumstanceshas
gifts and talents that make him more than a recipient of your support. Your mentee should be
treated as having much to offer to the world, because he does.
Developmental Assets are positive factors within young people, families, communities, schools, and other settings that research has found to be important in promoting 31
young peoples development. This handout may be reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses only (with this copyright line). From Mentoring for Meaningful
Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and Activities for Youth and Adults. Copyright 2006 by Search InstituteSM; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org.
FOR MENTORS
CONTINUES
32
FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS ABOUT BEING A MENTOR 9
Realize that youre both starting from the same tions that require a yes or no response. Instead, use
place, but as an adult you have the benet of a few open-ended questions and share anecdotes about
extra years of experience, and maybe more con- your own feelings and experiences. By stopping
dence. Look beyond the surface. Allow yourself to to ask, Can you think of anything that made you
be curious and to learn. Dont think you have to feel the same way? or Do you have any advice for
be an expert in the latest music, slang, clothes, or me? you can build trust and identify similarities
piercing trends to make a connection with a young between the two of you.
person. In fact, thats not what most young people
want; they want you to be a grown-up, but a grown- 6 What if I say the wrong thing?
up who connects with them and looks for common Mentors are not perfect. Just like any other human
ground with them. You dont have to be the same being, you may nd yourself saying something
as one another; but as you explore similarities and embarrassing, hurtful, or even offensive to your
differences, your mutual understanding will ll the mentee. When you realize that youve made a mis-
gaps and form a friendship bond that lasts. take, you can use the opportunity to model humility.
Offer a heartfelt apology. Admit you were wrong.
4 Im not exactly cool. What if my You may be the rst adult who has ever shown your
mentee doesnt like me? young friend this type of respect by asking for for-
Dont worry. Most young people dont expect you giveness. Seeing adults handle problems and take
to be cool, and they can like you without being like responsibility can help youth develop their own
you. Whats more important to them is that you positive conict resolution skills.
be authentic. Theyd much rather you be yourself,
complete with all your quirks and imperfections, 7 What kinds of things will my mentee
than keep your distance for fear of being thought and I do together?
uncool. If you can show sincere interest in young Mentoring programs vary widely. You may be par-
people as unique human beings with gifts to be dis- ticipating in a one-on-one mentoring program that
coveredas people who deserve to be respected meets in a school cafeteria, a group mentoring pro-
and supportedthats really all it takes. Youll be gram organized by a juvenile justice organization,
surprised how fast you connect with your mentee or an informal mentoring club started by a congre-
when you genuinely take an interest in who they gation. Depending on the location and boundaries
are. set by your specic program, you may have pre-
planned activities or a range of options.
5 What if my mentee wont talk to me? Talk with program staff to learn which activi-
Shyness is especially common at the beginning of ties are appropriate in your setting. You and your
a relationship, but even prolonged silence is not mentee may do homework assignments, or you
necessarily an indication that youre not connect- may conduct service projects for a local charity, or
ing. Some young people will simply enjoy your you may play card games, or you may occasionally
company without saying much about it. Silence is just run errands together. The important thing is
okay, and you might learn to feel more comfortable not what you do, but how you do it. Make it clear
with it if you discover that your mentee is just a that friendship and learning more about each other
quiet person. are the main goals.
When you begin talking with your mentee, try
to avoid bombarding her or him with lots of ques-
CONTINUES
33
9 FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS ABOUT BEING A MENTOR
8 What will I do if my mentee tells me helpful to dene ground rules for condentiality.
something Im not sure how to handle Early on in your relationship, you and your mentee
(e.g., hes afraid to tell his parents he is gay, can talk about what you expect from each other.
shes being bullied at school, his girlfriend Explain that you will be an open listener, but you
is pregnant)? will always try to do what is best for your young
When you build trust with a young person, you friend. Talk generally about physical and emo-
may nd that you hear intimate, unexpected, and tional health and safety issues that might require
even shocking or upsetting revelations. As a men- help from other people. Assure your mentee that
tor, your job is to listen, to avoid being judgmen- you will always act with her or his best interests in
tal, and to defer to program staff or other profes- mind. If there comes a time when you need to seek
sionals when you know that a mentee needs help. outside help for your mentee, you can refer back to
Before you nd yourself in a situation like this, it is the promises you made in this early conversation.
34 Developmental Assets are positive factors within young people, families, communities, schools, and other settings that research has found to be important in promoting
young peoples development. This handout may be reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses only (with this copyright line). From Mentoring for Meaningful
Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and Activities for Youth and Adults. Copyright 2006 by Search InstituteSM; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org.
FOR MENTORS
10
CONTINUES
35
10 WHAT ARE DEVELOPMENTAL ASSETS?
36 Adapted from Conversations on the Go: Clever Questions to Keep Teens and Grown-Ups Talking by Mary Alice Ackerman; copyright 2004 by Search Institute.
Developmental Assets are positive factors within young people, families, communities, schools, and other settings that research has found to be important in promoting
young peoples development. This handout may be reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses only (with this copyright line). From Mentoring for Meaningful
Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and Activities for Youth and Adults. Copyright 2006 by Search InstituteSM; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org.
FOR MENTORS
11
CONTINUES
37
11 WHAT IS ASSET BUILDING?
When adults make deliberate efforts to help the lead. You dont need a careful plan to build
young people increase the number and degree of assets.
Developmental Assets they experience in their Get to know your mentees interests and
lives, it is called asset building. If you focus your hobbies. Help him nd opportunities to get
energy on nding ways to help your mentee build involved with organized activities or programs
these commonsense assets through your rela- that use or develop those interests or hobbies.
tionship, you stand a good chance of making a dif-
Talk about and model your personal values.
ference in her or his life.
Encourage your mentee to think about the
values that are important to her and how those
SOME BASIC TIPS FOR HOW MENTORS values affect behavior and decisions.
CAN BUILD DEVELOPMENTAL ASSETS
Share a new experience together, such
Remember that the focus of mentoring
as shing, visiting a local museum (some
is on forming a relationship and being a
have days when entrance fees are waived
positive adult role model. What you do during
or reduced), taking a class, eating at a new
your regular visits with your mentee matters
restaurant, or ying a kite.
less than the fact that you are spending time
together and providing your mentee with Practice life skills together. For example,
support and care. prepare a meal together and serve it to your
mentees family or friends.
Show your mentee that she is a priority by
keeping in touch on a regular basis. Even if Emphasize the importance of a lifelong
you cannot be together very often, write letters, commitment to learning. Go to the library
send cards, talk on the phone, or send e-mail or together and check out books to read together.
text messages. Help your mentee with homework or nd
someone who can.
Let your mentee know that you care about
things that are important to him. For Talk about some of your hopes and plans
example, if your mentee has a special friend or for the future and ask about your mentees
pet, ask regularly about how he is doing. If your vision of the future. Share ideas with each
mentee plays a sport, attend a game or match. other about how you can make your respective
If he sings or plays an instrument, ask for a dreams come true. If it seems as if your dreams
personal recital once in a while. cant or wont come true, work together to come
up with ways to deal with barriers.
Be exible. If your mentee has ideas about
things to do or ways to do them, let her take Enjoy your time together and have fun!
38 Adapted from Pass It On! Ready-to-Use Handouts for Asset Builders; copyright 1999 by Search Institute. Developmental Assets are positive factors within young
people, families, communities, schools, and other settings that research has found to be important in promoting young peoples development. This handout may be
reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses only (with this copyright line). From Mentoring for Meaningful Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and Activities for Youth
and Adults. Copyright 2006 by Search InstituteSM; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org.
FOR MENTORS
12
When you think of yourself, your friends, or What kind of help do you think young people
your classmates as a whole, what types of often need?
challenges do you see young people having?
How do peers hurt, rather than help, one another, What kinds of issues or problems are appropriate
sometimes making life even more difcult? for a peer mentor to deal with? What kinds of situ-
ations might be better handled by an adult?
Adapted from An Asset Builders Guide to Training Peer Helpers; copyright 2003 by Barbara B. Varenhorst, Ph.D. Developmental Assets are positive factors within 39
young people, families, communities, schools, and other settings that research has found to be important in promoting young peoples development. This handout may
be reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses only (with this copyright line). From Mentoring for Meaningful Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and Activities for
Youth and Adults. Copyright 2006 by Search InstituteSM; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org.
FOR MENTORS
13
CONTINUES
40
DEVELOPMENTAL STAGES OF YOUNG PEOPLE 13
Suggest that your mentee break planning and age when romantic relationships start to become
decision making down into a series of steps. of interest, and friends and peers become even
Ask questions that highlight the positive more important in their lives. As young people
results of good decisions and the unpleasant mature, they begin to actively seek out ways to
consequences of poor planning. be more independent of their family and to bond
more closely with peers.
Listen carefully without criticizing.
Tips for interacting with your mentee:
Listen to your mentees thoughts about
the future. At this age, young people are beginning to think
Support and respect his decisions. like adults, but they dont have the experience
and judgment needed to act like adults. Help
Offer ideas about what you think she might your mentee recognize this.
like to do or be good at.
Suggest constructive behaviors, but provide
Find other mentors who can help direct his multiple options to allow your mentee to
choices. make choices. For example, describe the
Share your own excitement about the world and positive aspects of helping a younger child with
its possibilities. homework, doing chores without being asked,
or volunteering with a friend at a local charity.
RELATIONSHIPS WITH OTHERS Never give up on your mentee, even when
Generally, 10- to 12-year-olds still enjoy being things get tough.
around their family members. This is typically the
Developmental Assets are positive factors within young people, families, communities, schools, and other settings that research has found to be important in promoting 41
young peoples development. This handout may be reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses only (with this copyright line). From Mentoring for Meaningful
Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and Activities for Youth and Adults. Copyright 2006 by Search InstituteSM; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org.
FOR MENTORS
14
CONTINUES
42
SAFETY, LIABILITY, AND BOUNDARIES 14
Transportation issues
Developmental Assets are positive factors within young people, families, communities, schools, and other settings that research has found to be important in promoting 43
young peoples development. This handout may be reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses only (with this copyright line). From Mentoring for Meaningful
Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and Activities for Youth and Adults. Copyright 2006 by Search InstituteSM; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org.
FOR MENTORS
15
44
MAKING THE TIME: INCLUDING YOUR MENTEE IN YOUR ALREADY BUSY LIFE 15
Some mentoring programs have reasons to programs policies. If you are part of a program that
restrict your interactions with your mentee and allows you to choose your activity and location,
limit you to a designated meeting place, such as you have the opportunity to think outside the box
a school or a residential setting for young people. about when and where you and your mentee get
Make sure you are familiar with your mentoring together.
Developmental Assets are positive factors within young people, families, communities, schools, and other settings that research has found to be important in promoting 45
young peoples development. This handout may be reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses only (with this copyright line). From Mentoring for Meaningful
Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and Activities for Youth and Adults. Copyright 2006 by Search InstituteSM; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org.
FOR MENTORS
16
46 Developmental Assets are positive factors within young people, families, communities, schools, and other settings that research has found to be important in promoting
young peoples development. This handout may be reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses only (with this copyright line). From Mentoring for Meaningful
Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and Activities for Youth and Adults. Copyright 2006 by Search InstituteSM; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org.
FOR MENTORS
17
Adapted from Conversations on the Go: Clever Questions to Keep Teens and Grown-Ups Talking; copyright 2004 by Search Institute. Developmental Assets are positive 47
factors within young people, families, communities, schools, and other settings that research has found to be important in promoting young peoples development. This
handout may be reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses only (with this copyright line). From Mentoring for Meaningful Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and
Activities for Youth and Adults. Copyright 2006 by Search InstituteSM; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org.
FOR MENTORS
18
Baking cookies Baking is a good skill to learn; the I can encourage my mentee to take the
conversations we have strengthen lead in reading the recipe and measuring
our relationship; and when were ingredients. When were done, we
done, we have cookies to eat! could take cookies to a neighbor whose
husband is ill.
Planting a garden Its a satisfying activity when We could take owers we grew to
the plants start growing; they someone who is feeling ill or down,
create a visual reminder of fun or to thank someone for being there
times together; and we have an for us. We could plant and maintain a
opportunity for conversations about ower bed for someone with physical
harder topics, since we dont limitations.
necessarily have to be face-to-face.
Swapping books Its fun; it helps us appreciate We could choose books that address
and magazines reading for pleasure; we can learn important social or emotional issues
about each others favorite reading and read chapters aloud together.
materials.
Attending a Its fun; its exciting, especially if I could start a conversation about players
professional a home run ball comes your way; who have made good with their fame
baseball game and we get to watch some of our and fortune by supporting causes and
favorite players. valuing their family. We could talk about
the reality of just how many athletes
become professional. We could discuss
other ways to make sports a part of your
life besides being a professional athlete.
CONTINUES
48
LITTLE THINGS CAN MEAN A LOT! 18
Developmental Assets are positive factors within young people, families, communities, schools, and other settings that research has found to be important in promoting 49
young peoples development. This handout may be reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses only (with this copyright line). From Mentoring for Meaningful
Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and Activities for Youth and Adults. Copyright 2006 by Search InstituteSM; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org.
FOR MENTORS
19
50
MODELING POSITIVE BEHAVIOR 19
Developmental Assets are positive factors within young people, families, communities, schools, and other settings that research has found to be important in promoting 51
young peoples development. This handout may be reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses only (with this copyright line). From Mentoring for Meaningful
Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and Activities for Youth and Adults. Copyright 2006 by Search InstituteSM; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org.
FOR MENTORS
20
1 Beginning the relationshipIn this stage 2 Building trustNow that the two of you know
mentors and mentees are testing the waters with each other better and have some shared experi-
each other. Mentees may feel nervous or wary, and ences under your belt, you and your mentee may
they may be putting on their best behavior for you. experience greater trust. Your mentee may be
They may also get frustrated if things dont go as coming out of his shell, feeling better about him-
they expected. You as a mentor may want to x self, or simply more condent because you have
everything. You may nd yourself adjusting your ini- demonstrated that you care. As a result, he may
tial expectations about being a mentor, once youve share more information with you. He may start
experienced it for real. Both of you may be trying to to rely on you more for support and validation in
bridge each others age, cultural, and lifestyle differ- this stage, possibly to the point of becoming over-
ences as well as nding things in common. dependent. At this stage, you may be experiencing
more satisfaction with the mentoring relationship.
Strategies for this stage:
You also may, however, be feeling overwhelmed by
Be consistent and reliable. the extent of the issues faced by the mentee.
Show you are willing to listen. Strategies for this stage:
Focus on doing things with rather than for Be patient.
your mentee.
Expect setbacks.
Be aware of your own feelings about age,
cultural, and lifestyle differences. If you think your mentee is becoming too
dependent, set limits around the frequency and
Be nonjudgmental. duration of visits and encourage him to broaden
Reach out, be available. his support network.
Be open and honest about what you can, Be involved, yet keep perspective.
cant, or have to do. Continue to be consistent and reliable.
Continue to treat your mentee as capable.
CONTINUES
52
COMMON PHASES OF A MENTORING RELATIONSHIP 19
Common Phases of a Mentoring Relationship is adapted from Growth Cycles of a Match, copyright 2005 by Big Brothers Big Sisters of the Greater Twin Cities. 53
Developmental Assets are positive factors within young people, families, communities, schools, and other settings that research has found to be important in promoting
young peoples development. This handout may be reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses only (with this copyright line). From Mentoring for Meaningful
Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and Activities for Youth and Adults. Copyright 2006 by Search InstituteSM; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org.
FOR MENTORS
21
54 Developmental Assets are positive factors within young people, families, communities, schools, and other settings that research has found to be important in promoting
young peoples development. This handout may be reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses only (with this copyright line). From Mentoring for Meaningful
Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and Activities for Youth and Adults. Copyright 2006 by Search InstituteSM; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org.
FOR MENTORS
22
Developmental Assets are positive factors within young people, families, communities, schools, and other settings that research has found to be important in promoting 55
young peoples development. This handout may be reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses only (with this copyright line). From Mentoring for Meaningful
Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and Activities for Youth and Adults. Copyright 2006 by Search InstituteSM; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org.
FOR MENTORS
23
Family Relationships
Adolescence is a time when young people naturally Help your mentee focus his frustration with
begin to exert their independence from their families. family members on behaviors, not on the
It is also a time of more volatile emotions. All of this persons themselves.
alone can naturally cause stress on the home front Talk about why families enforce boundaries
for teens and their parents or caregivers and siblings. on young people. A curfew that seems unfair
Add to this mix any other stresses on a familysuch may be in place because parents and caregivers
as divorce, nancial problems, health issues, or legal want to protect their child.
challengesand an adolescents already stressful
existence can be thrown into overdrive. Continue to have high expectations for your
Rest assured that just by being a constant, posi- mentees behavior and achievement. Dont
tive presence in your mentees life, you can help allow family situations to be used as a barrier or
her or him through the ups and downs of life. But an excuse.
there are times when, as a caring nonfamily adult Help your mentee strategize the many ways
in your mentees life, you may need to provide extra she could confront a difcult family situation,
support. So how can you help your mentee through weighing the pros and cons of each approach.
changing family relationships and challenges with- Advocate for your mentees health and
out crossing the line into interfering? This is a
safety. It is possible that your mentees parent
tough distinction, and you can always consult pro-
or caregiver is not making good choices on
gram staff for assistance with difcult situations.
your mentees behalf. If you suspect that his
Here are some additional ideas for helping your
home situation is in serious turmoil that could
mentee with family interactions:
escalate to abuse or neglect, talk to program
Let your mentee know you are there for staff about your concerns. Ask them to connect
her, no matter what. Be a constant source of the family to professional services. Do not try to
support even when her family is struggling. step in and mediate the situation yourself.
Point out the positive things that are Reach out to your mentees family early on in
happening in his family. When a family the relationship to help build strong support
member shows love or caring, be sure your for the mentoring relationship. Be sure to
mentee notices. honor any policies the mentoring program has in
Assure your mentee that she is a good place regarding whether or how you can interact
person with gifts and talents to contribute. with your mentees caregivers. If the program
Tell her about specic times when you have encourages mentor interaction with parents, and
observed her being a good daughter, sibling, you are comfortable doing so, nd ways to build
grandchild, or friend. rapport and trust with them. It may take months
before a parent or caregiver is comfortable
When conict arises, help your mentee
reaching out to you, but eventually you and your
separate the person he is in conict with
mentees family may be able to build a strong
from that persons behavior. Mom may be
alliance of support for your mentee.
a fun, caring person who made a big mistake.
56 Developmental Assets are positive factors within young people, families, communities, schools, and other settings that research has found to be important in promoting
young peoples development. This handout may be reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses only (with this copyright line). From Mentoring for Meaningful
Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and Activities for Youth and Adults. Copyright 2006 by Search InstituteSM; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org.
FOR MENTORS
24
Developmental Assets are positive factors within young people, families, communities, schools, and other settings that research has found to be important in promoting 57
young peoples development. This handout may be reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses only (with this copyright line). From Mentoring for Meaningful
Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and Activities for Youth and Adults. Copyright 2006 by Search InstituteSM; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org.
FOR MENTORS
25
58 Developmental Assets are positive factors within young people, families, communities, schools, and other settings that research has found to be important in promoting
young peoples development. This handout may be reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses only (with this copyright line). From Mentoring for Meaningful
Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and Activities for Youth and Adults. Copyright 2006 by Search InstituteSM; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org.
FOR MENTORS
26
CONTINUES
59
EXPLORING OPPORTUNITIES FOR GROWTH 26
60 Developmental Assets are positive factors within young people, families, communities, schools, and other settings that research has found to be important in promoting
young peoples development. This handout may be reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses only (with this copyright line). From Mentoring for Meaningful
Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and Activities for Youth and Adults. Copyright 2006 by Search InstituteSM; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org.
FOR MENTORS
27
61
WHAT TO DO WHEN THE RELATIONSHIP ENDS 27
presence of staff from the mentoring program. Make sure your mentees family knows
Be honest but careful. If lack of time is the about the change. Either ask your mentoring
issue, dont leave your mentee thinking he program staff to tell the family or tell them
is not important to you. Rather, frame the yourself. This will help give them time to
conversation about the strengths your mentee prepare ways they can support their child
has, the changes he has made in your life, and through the transition.
the realities you face (demanding job, household
responsibilities) that are unavoidable.
62 Developmental Assets are positive factors within young people, families, communities, schools, and other settings that research has found to be important in promoting
young peoples development. This handout may be reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses only (with this copyright line). From Mentoring for Meaningful
Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and Activities for Youth and Adults. Copyright 2006 by Search InstituteSM; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org.
FOR MENTORS
28
Looking Back on
Your Mentoring Experience
Youve experienced mentoring rsthandthe ups mentoring experience and, just as important, what
and downs, the small victories and the setbacks. impact your mentee has had on you.
You may spend a lot of your energy focusing on Below are some questions to help you reect
how this relationship has affected your mentee. on your mentoring experience. If you feel comfort-
But in order to make a healthy transition into a able, discuss this handout and share your answers
different stage, it is important for you, the men- with your mentee.
tor, to take stock in what you have gained from the
CONTINUES
63
LOOKING BACK ON YOUR MENTORING EXPERIENCE 28
64 Developmental Assets are positive factors within young people, families, communities, schools, and other settings that research has found to be important in promoting
young peoples development. This handout may be reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses only (with this copyright line). From Mentoring for Meaningful
Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and Activities for Youth and Adults. Copyright 2006 by Search InstituteSM; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org.
HANDOUTS FOR
MENTEES
istorically, our society has viewed the cli- level. The handouts that follow provide another
H ent of any social program as simply a pas- collection of helpful tools you can offer mentees as
sive recipient of an organizations services. For they meet their mentors and learn more about this
some mentoring programs, this means mentors type of friendship. Once again, the Developmen-
and program staff unintentionally deliver help to tal Assets framework adds structure and additional
mentees instead of working with young people. An meaning to the advice.
asset-building approach goes beyond this concept You are not just in the business of matching
to welcome mentees as active contributors to the young people with mentors. You are also helping
mentoring team, treating them as important play- build a foundation for mentees to grow into healthy,
ers in the success of a mentoring relationship and caring, and responsible adults. Empowering them
in their own development. to take charge of their own healthy development is
This next section will encourage mentees to an important way to make the mentoring relation-
make the most of their mentoring relationship as a ship stronger and more meaningful.
way of taking their positive development to the next
65
65
FOR MENTEES
29
YOUR MENTOR IS . . .
. . . a friend. Like any friendship, mentors and mentees do fun things together. They also teach
each other, help each other, and are honest with each other. And sometimes they might want to
have conversations about things that make them feel worried or upset.
. . . a role model. Mentors try to set a good example for how to live. Mentors are not perfect
people. Your mentor will do his best to share with you what hes good at, and he should be
honest about mistakes he has made or things he is not good at doing.
. . . a listener you can trust. You may say things to your mentor that you dont feel comfortable
saying to anyone else. Sometimes you may tell your mentor about your hopes, dreams, or fears.
Other times you may reveal mistakes youve made. Mentors have your best interests in mind and
try to be supportive of you, regardless of what you conde in them.
. . . someone who is proud of you. Your mentor should be able to see all the talents you have
and help you learn and grow. She can help you take actions that make a positive difference to
others in your family, neighborhood, school, or community.
. . . a social worker or doctor. You may tell something to your mentor, or she may think some-
thing is going on in your life, and she may need to ask for help from other people in order to
help you. This is because some problems you face may be complicated, and your mentor might
need professional help in order to be the best mentor to you that she can be.
. . . a xer. Your mentor is not trying to change you or make you better. Of course, his sup-
port can help you overcome hurdles in your life. But dont forget that you have gifts and talents;
you have a lot to offer the world. Your mentors job is to help you build and use those gifts and
talents to make a difference in your life and the lives of others.
CONTINUES
66
MY MENTORS ROLE IN MY LIFE 29
REMEMBER TO. . .
. . . give your mentor a chance. Nobodys perfect, and it may not seem at rst like you have
much in common. But give it some time, and try to get to know her. You may be surprised at
how much you can enjoy being with your mentor once you get to know her.
. . . show your mentor you appreciate him. Tell him when youve had fun with him. Thank him
when he has spent time with or money on you. This will help your mentor feel good about the
time you spend together.
. . . be open to new experiences. Your mentor may ask you to try new things. Maybe its a differ-
ent kind of food, or maybe its a trip to a museum. Give it a chance.
Developmental Assets are positive factors in young people, families, communities, schools, and other settings that research has found to be important in promoting 67
young peoples development. This handout may be reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses only (with this copyright line). From Mentoring for Meaningful
Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and Activities for Youth and Adults. Copyright 2006 by Search InstituteSM; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org.
FOR MENTEES
30
68 Developmental Assets are positive factors within young people, families, communities, schools, and other settings that research has found to be important in promoting
young peoples development. This handout may be reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses only (with this copyright line). From Mentoring for Meaningful
Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and Activities for Youth and Adults. Copyright 2006 by Search InstituteSM; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org.
FOR MENTEES
31
What Are
Developmental Assets?
Do you ever wonder: Who linked with having what researchers call Develop-
am I? Where do I t it in? mental Assets. Grouped into eight categories, the
How do I gure out whats assets are positive qualities, skills, characteristics,
important to me? How can and experiences that young people need. (If you
I reach my dreams? havent received a copy of the complete list, you
can visit www.search-institute.org/assets/assetlists
If youre wondering about these
to learn more.) By focusing on assets, you can aim
things, youre not alone; theyre
toward being your besta person happy to be alive;
questions most people want to gure out. How you
someone who makes the most of every day with a
answer these questions is part of what makes you
positive attitude; a person others look up to, count
uniqueand can help you follow your dreams.
on, trust, and respect.
Trying to gure out the answers can be dif-
Below is a list of the eight categories of assets
cult and confusing, but theres a lot that can help
that young people need in order to be caring,
you along the way. The choices you make and the
healthy, and responsible. There are also ideas for
way you live your life, including doing your best
how you can build these assets in your own life.
in school and staying healthy and safe, are strongly
SupportAll of us need to feel loved, cared To become more empowered, think about what
for, appreciated, accepted, and included. Sup- youre willing to work on. For example:
port is about being there for others, and others being When youre feeling powerless, look for oppor-
there for you. tunities to help other people in your community.
To get more support in your life, work on forming
good relationships. For example: Pitch in with chores at home or volunteer to be
on a safety committee at school. Find useful
When you dont know how to connect with roles like these in all aspects of your life.
someone new, try telling a little bit about your-
self to get started. You could say, I just heard
Boundaries and ExpectationsWe all
the best song, and see where that goes.
need to know that what people expect of us is
Be respectful of what the other person prefers. reasonable and also challenges us to do our best.
Some people feel ne asking for help; others Sometimes adults need help seeing that youre
would rather you offered them help rst. ready to have more responsibility and freedom. Being
patient and willing to negotiate and showing respect
EmpowermentAll of us need to feel that and responsibility will make discussions about whats
people believe we have something important to in bounds and whats out of bounds go more smoothly.
give the world and encourage us to contribute our time
and talents. Empowerment is about feeling valuable.
CONTINUES
69
31 WHAT ARE DEVELOPMENTAL ASSETS?
Think about a time when you were proud of you the leader of yourself (and maybe others, too).
yourself because you tried hard. Remember- To act on your positive values, show others what
ing those times can help you keep having high you care about. For example:
expectations of yourself. Choose a social problem, such as homelessness,
Talk openly with an adult about a rule youd to help work on. Try not to be discouraged by
like to change. Think about ways to meet in the the size and difculty of a problemthat just
middle on a new version of the rule. means your help is needed even more.
Think about what you like to learn and what you Positive IdentityWhen you have self-
dont. For example, try classes taught by teach- esteem, you have condence in who you are
ers youve heard other students really like, even and can talk comfortably and proudly about what
if theyre subjects youre not sure about. It may makes you unique. When you believe in your ability
be easier to learn something when your teacher to make good things happen, you feel more hopeful.
cares about you and is excited about what he or To develop a positive identity, pay attention to
she is teaching. how you think about yourself and your future. For
example:
Ask an adult to teach you a new skill, such as
shing or cooking. Remember that not all Focus on your best skills and give yourself credit
learning happens in a classroom. for the things you try but dont do so well.
70 Adapted from Me @ My Best: Ideas for Staying True to YourselfEvery Day; copyright 2003 by Search Institute. Developmental Assets are positive factors within
young people, families, communities, schools, and other settings that research has found to be important in promoting young peoples development. This handout may
be reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses only (with this copyright line). From Mentoring for Meaningful Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and Activities for
Youth and Adults. Copyright 2006 by Search InstituteSM; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org.
FOR MENTEES
32
Talk about what you expect. Before a problem happens, try to let your mentor know about
things that matter to you or make you upset. Here are some
examples:
Learn that its okay to disagree. You and your mentor probably arent going to agree on
everything, and thats just ne. It doesnt mean anything is
wrong. Youre just two different people getting to know each
other, and its okay to have different opinions.
Use I statements. You might feel like saying, You make me so mad, or You
never call me. Instead, try starting your sentences with I and
describe your own feelings without blaming your mentor. Here
are some examples:
CONTINUES
71
32 HANDLING CONFLICT WITH MY MENTOR
Listen respectfully. Even when you feel upset, try to remember that your mentor
has feelings, too. Give your mentor a chance to talk about the
conict. Pay close attention and try not to interrupt. When your
mentor has nished speaking, ask questions to make sure you
understand how he or she feels. Here are some questions you
might use:
Have you had a conict like this before? What did you do
to solve that problem?
Talk to another caring adult. Sometimes you might not feel ready to talk with your mentor
about a problem. Instead, you might nd it helpful to talk with
an adult in your family or with a staff person at the mentoring
program. Other adults can help you sort out your feelings and
think of ways to make the problem better. It might also help you
cool off until youre ready to talk respectfully with your mentor.
Reach out for help immediately. There are certain situations when you should
denitely talk with another adult, and not with
your mentor. Be sure to ask a different person
you trust for help in the following situations:
The whole point of mentoring is to form a rela- mentor or with the help of other caring adults, you
tionship that makes you feel valuable, cared for, will have a stronger friendship that is more fun for
and safe. By working through conicts with your both of you.
72 Developmental Assets are positive factors within young people, families, communities, schools, and other settings that research has found to be important in promoting
young peoples development. This handout may be reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses only (with this copyright line). From Mentoring for Meaningful
Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and Activities for Youth and Adults. Copyright 2006 by Search InstituteSM; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org.
FOR MENTEES
33
It is important to remember that every mentoring Sometimes you grow away from people, and some-
relationship ends at some point in time. In fact, your times friends may talk less, but that doesnt mean the
mentoring program may set up a limited amount relationship was a failure. If your formal mentoring
of time for your mentoring relationship. Besides, relationship is ending, you can try a few things to
its normal for relationships to change over time. make the situation go as smoothly as possible.
Developmental Assets are positive factors within young people, families, communities, schools, and other settings that research has found to be important in promoting 73
young peoples development. This handout may be reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses only (with this copyright line). From Mentoring for Meaningful
Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and Activities for Youth and Adults. Copyright 2006 by Search InstituteSM; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org.
FOR MENTEES
34
Looking Back on
Your Mentoring Experience
SO WHAT HAVE I GOTTEN OUT OF
THIS RELATIONSHIP? ship, it is important for you to think about what you
have gained from the mentoring experience.
Youve been through a lot with your mentorthe Below are some questions to help you reect
ups and downs, some fun activities, and maybe some on your mentoring experience. If you feel comfort-
tough discussions. As you look back at your time able doing so, discuss this handout and share your
together or move toward a different kind of friend- answers with your mentor.
CONTINUES
74
LOOKING BACK ON YOUR MENTORING EXPERIENCE 34
Because of my mentoring
experience, what will I do more,
less, or differently in my life?
Developmental Assets are positive factors within young people, families, communities, schools, and other settings that research has found to be important in promoting 75
young peoples development. This handout may be reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses only (with this copyright line). From Mentoring for Meaningful
Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and Activities for Youth and Adults. Copyright 2006 by Search InstituteSM; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org.
HANDOUTS FOR
MENTORS AND MENTEES TO USE TOGETHER
our organization may already do substantial Whether they are working out schedules or strug-
Y upfront work setting up mentormentee gling with stereotypes, matches will nd that the
matches for a successful, thriving relationship. Developmental Asset approach helps them face the
Effective recruitment, screening, matching, and challenges of mentoring as a team. As they work
training all go a long way in building a positive together toward common goals, they will develop a
experience for mentees and mentors. One of the more productive and rewarding friendship.
most challenging parts of your job may be helping You know the benets of mentoring dont just
matches build their relationship during their time come from the pairing of a mentee with a mentor.
together, when you may or may not be present to Rather, its the quality of the relationship between
prompt them with ideas. the two that nurtures the positive development of
The following handouts will supply mentor mentees (and their mentors, too). Use these tools
mentee matches with information, talking tips, and to help mentoring pairs achieve the meaningful
concrete activities for enriching their time together. results you know are possible.
77
FOR MENTORS & MENTEES
35
Conversation Topics
for Introducing Yourselves
Take turns asking each other to ll in the blanks after the items listed below.
When I was younger, the person I liked to be around was ___________________, because he or she . . .
CONTINUES
78
CONVERSATION TOPICS FOR INTRODUCING YOURSELVES 35
One adult who valued and accepted me was __________________________. Our relationship was . . .
CONTINUES
79
35 CONVERSATION TOPICS FOR INTRODUCING YOURSELVES
Parents and other adults need to try to understand that young people . . .
I sometimes fear . . .
Im looking forward to . . .
Some of the feelings or questions I have about my role in our friendship include . . .
To make our times together fun and interesting for both of us, Im willing to . . .
When I look back on this experience a year from now, I hope Ill be able to say that I helped you to . . .
(list)and that you helped me to . . .
80 Adapted from In Good Company: Tools to Help Youth and Adults Talk; copyright 2001 by Search Institute. Developmental Assets are positive factors within young
people, families, communities, schools, and other settings that research has found to be important in promoting young peoples development. This handout may be
reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses only (with this copyright line). From Mentoring for Meaningful Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and Activities for Youth
and Adults. Copyright 2006 by Search InstituteSM; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org.
FOR MENTORS & MENTEES
36
What is a subject or
What is one thing about What do you do when
topic that isnt taught in your
your cultural heritage that you you disagree with rules you
school, but one you would
are really proud of? are supposed to follow?
really like to learn about?
You fast-forward 50
When people rst meet
If you could achieve only years and discover a new
you, what do you think they
one great thing in your life, holiday is named in your honor.
see? What do you wish they
what would it be? What would people be
would see in you?
celebrating about you?
Adapted from Conversations on the Go: Clever Questions to Keep Teens and Grown-Ups Talking; copyright 2004 by Search Institute. Developmental Assets are positive 81
factors within young people, families, communities, schools, and other settings that research has found to be important in promoting young peoples development. This
handout may be reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses only (with this copyright line). From Mentoring for Meaningful Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and
Activities for Youth and Adults. Copyright 2006 by Search InstituteSM; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org.
FOR MENTORS & MENTEES
37
Pick a regular day to meet. Your mentoring Practice time management skills. If you have day
program may have guidelines about when and planners, pencil in your next few visits. Obviously,
where you meet. If your schedules allow for it, try mentees need to check
selecting one day you will do something together with their families to
each week. If you can also set the meetings at a make sure the time will
predictable time, so much the better. (For work. Make scheduling
example, you will pick up your mentee every fundraw pictures and
Wednesday at 5:00 p.m.) use fun colors to code
different kinds of activi-
Talk between visits. Decide which of you will be
in charge of calling the other person a few days ties. If one of you does not have much practice
before your next visit to check in about how with maintaining a calendar or planner, work
things are going and remind each other of your together to identify regular activities, family obli-
next visit. gations, and other ways you occupy your time
and plug those things into a day planner.
Keep a calendar. If there is a family calendar in
the mentees house, use it to write down your Leave a note on the fridge. Mentee, pick out a
next visits. If there is not a family calendar in the refrigerator magnet that you like. At the end of
house, mentors and mentees can look for a cal- each visit, decide with your mentor and your
endar that the parent(s) or caregiver(s) might family when the next visit will be. Write the date
like. Your mentoring program staff may even have and time on a piece of paper, and put it on your
calendars or supplies you can use to make a cal- homes refrigerator with the special magnet.
endar together.
82 Developmental Assets are positive factors within young people, families, communities, schools, and other settings that research has found to be important in promoting
young peoples development. This handout may be reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses only (with this copyright line). From Mentoring for Meaningful
Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and Activities for Youth and Adults. Copyright 2006 by Search InstituteSM; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org.
FOR MENTORS & MENTEES
38
MENTORS REFLECTIONS
Date
MENTEES REFLECTIONS
Date
Developmental Assets are positive factors within young people, families, communities, schools, and other settings that research has found to be important in promoting 83
young peoples development. This handout may be reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses only (with this copyright line). From Mentoring for Meaningful
Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and Activities for Youth and Adults. Copyright 2006 by Search InstituteSM; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org.
FOR MENTORS & MENTEES
39
FAMILY
Who raises/raised me
CONTINUES
84
IDENTIFYING COMMON INTERESTS 39
SCHOOL
My favorite subjects
INTERESTS
Hobbies
Places I like to go
CONTINUES
85
39 IDENTIFYING COMMON INTERESTS
Favorite animals
Favorite foods
CONTINUES
86
IDENTIFYING COMMON INTERESTS 39
VALUES
I believe strongly in . . .
FUTURE
Developmental Assets are positive factors within young people, families, communities, schools, and other settings that research has found to be important in promoting 87
young peoples development. This handout may be reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses only (with this copyright line). From Mentoring for Meaningful
Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and Activities for Youth and Adults. Copyright 2006 by Search InstituteSM; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org.
FOR MENTORS & MENTEES
40
CONTINUES
88
REFLECTING ON THE ASSET CATEGORIES 40
Adapted from Handouts and Overheads from Great Places to Learn; copyright 2000 by Search Institute. Developmental Assets are positive factors within young 89
people, families, communities, schools, and other settings that research has found to be important in promoting young peoples development. This handout may be
reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses only (with this copyright line). From Mentoring for Meaningful Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and Activities for Youth
and Adults. Copyright 2006 by Search InstituteSM; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org.
FOR MENTORS & MENTEES
41
ADULTS ARE . . .
. . . go to a dance at school?
strict, . . . go on a date?
CONTINUES
90
BRIDGING GENERATIONAL DIFFERENCES 41
What was/is the television you had growing up What was/is going on in the world that really
like (e.g. remote controls, number of channels)? made/makes you think about life and your role
in it?
ENTERTAINMENT What events happened/happen in your
neighborhood or community that made/make
What kind of music did/do you and your friends
you think about life and your role in it?
listen to? Why did/do you like it?
How did/does your family feel about the music
JOBS
you like?
What was your rst job? How much did/do you
What television shows did/do you watch?
make an hour?
Which celebrities were/are popular with you
Whats the weirdest job youve ever had?
and your friends?
What concerts have you attended?
Developmental Assets are positive factors within young people, families, communities, schools, and other settings that research has found to be important in promoting 91
young peoples development. This handout may be reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses only (with this copyright line). From Mentoring for Meaningful
Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and Activities for Youth and Adults. Copyright 2006 by Search InstituteSM; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org.
FOR MENTORS & MENTEES
42
Avoiding Stereotypes
Getting to know and like people requires you to see 3 Point out the good or positive things
them for who they really are. This seems obvious about others.
and straightforward, but it is easy to get caught up Example: My mentee always nds the time to nish
in what people have, where theyre from, what they her homework after helping care for her brothers
look like, or how old they are and to assume things and sisters.
about them based on very little information, rather
than actually nding out what they are like, what
4 Share cultural information.
they enjoy doing, and what their hopes and dreams
for the future look like. Example: My mentor fasts during Ramadan. He
It is very possible that the two of you live in showed me the Islamic calendar and explained why
different parts of town (or in different cities alto- Ramadan happens at a different time each year.
gether), grew up in different kinds of families, or
have different cultural or ethnic backgrounds. That 5 Actively question (even just to yourself)
the reliability of the source of information.
doesnt mean you cant nd common ground and
even enjoy each others company. Example: I wonder if John really knows what people
The Peace Corps Web site (www.peacecorps. who live in a rural area are like. He was only there a
gov) offers advice to teachers and students on how few times. Maybe he or someone he knows just had
to avoid stereotyping others. These tips also work a bad experience.
well for mentors and mentees.
6 If you disagree, do so politely.
1 Think about or share opposite examples Example: Really, I just dont agree with you that girls
when someone makes a sweeping general- dont do as well as boys in math. That hasnt been
ization. true in our class.
Instead of saying: My mentor cant be cool because
she drives a minivan. 7 Point out that what may be true for some
is not necessarily true for all.
You can say: My mentor may drive a minivan, but
Example: I know some people in my mentees neigh-
she listens to great music on the radio.
borhood are not employed. However, most of his
neighbors are looking for jobs or already hold down
2 Give specic rather than general
two or more jobs to make ends meet.
information about people.
Example: My mentee loves to read and does well in 8 Wait before making a judgment.
school. In his spare time, he likes playing basketball
Think to yourself: That girl seems really stuck-up to
and hanging out with friends. Our favorite place to
me, but Id better wait to form an opinion about her.
eat together is at the local Chinese restaurant.
Maybe she just doesnt speak English very well. Or
maybe shes shy.
92 Parts of this handout were adapted and used with permission from Peace Corps World Wise Schools, www.PeaceCorps.gov/wws. Developmental Assets are positive
factors within young people, families, communities, schools, and other settings that research has found to be important in promoting young peoples development. This
handout may be reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses only (with this copyright line). From Mentoring for Meaningful Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and
Activities for Youth and Adults. Copyright 2006 by Search InstituteSM; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org.
FOR MENTORS & MENTEES
43
Age (teenager,
young adult,
middle aged,
elder)
Gender
Neighborhood
Race/ethnicity
Family structure
Developmental Assets are positive factors within young people, families, communities, schools, and other settings that research has found to be important in promoting 93
young peoples development. This handout may be reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses only (with this copyright line). From Mentoring for Meaningful
Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and Activities for Youth and Adults. Copyright 2006 by Search InstituteSM; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org.
FOR MENTORS & MENTEES
44
General Activities Wed Like to Try Academic, Career, and Life SkillsFocused
Activities Wed Like to Try
tor
tee
Men
Men
tor
tee
Men
Men
Cooking
Having lunch together Doing homework
Going bargain shopping Reading
Playing board games Working on a rsum
Playing video games Talking about career interests
Playing card games Talking about education possibilities,
beyond high school
Spending time on a farm
Visiting a local technical school, community
Making crafts or art college, or university
Attending a family gathering Working on college applications
Going to a book signing or author reading Working on nancial aid applications
Working on cars or bikes Practicing job interview skills
Scrapbooking Learning to balance a checkbook
Talking on the phone Going to a library
Taking care of pets Investigating the pros and cons of
Eating ice cream credit cards
Learning photography Taking a community education
Doing simple building projects class together
Learning how to knit or quilt Looking for jobs or internships
Visiting each others faith community Touring the mentors workplace
Figuring out how to program a VCR, x Talking about balancing work and life
a computer, or some other appliance Talking about living within ones means
Volunteering together for a local cause
Making stationery together, then sending
each other notes on it over the course of
the next year CONTINUES
94
FREE AND LOW-COST ACTIVITY IDEAS 44
Sports and Physical Activities Events and Activities That May Cost
Wed Like to Try More Money That Wed Like to Try
tor
tee
tor
tee
Men
Men
Men
Men
Swimming Going to a play
Bike riding Going to a museum
Rollerblading Attending a poetry slam
Bowling Going to an amusement park
Canoeing or boating Going to a county or state fair
Sledding Attending a community or neighborhood
Going to a park parade or festival
Fishing Attending a fund-raiser for a school,
congregation, or other cause
Playing catch
Attending a sporting event together
Horseback riding
Going to a concert together
Hunting
Visiting the zoo
Learning karate
Going to a movie
Snowboarding or skiing
Going to a show together (like a ower
show or an auto show)
Developmental Assets are positive factors within young people, families, communities, schools, and other settings that research has found to be important in promoting 95
young peoples development. This handout may be reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses only (with this copyright line). From Mentoring for Meaningful
Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and Activities for Youth and Adults. Copyright 2006 by Search InstituteSM; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org.
FOR MENTORS & MENTEES
45
Attend a hockey game or gure skating show. Here are a few ideas:
Write thank-you notes for holiday presents. Go to a baseball game.
Your ideas: Plant seeds for a garden.
Talk about taxes.
Tour a college campus and learn about
how to prepare for enrollment.
FEBRUARY Your ideas:
Here are a few ideas:
Rent each others favorite movies.
Read the same book and discuss it.
MAY
Go sledding.
Here are a few ideas:
Talk about your rst job.
Go to a high school play.
Your ideas:
Work on a rsum.
Plant a tree.
Go shing.
MARCH Your ideas:
Here are a few ideas:
Go to a high school basketball game.
Make plans for spring break. CONTINUES
96
A YEARS WORTH OF MENTORING ACTIVITIES 45
A Years Worth of Mentoring Activities is adapted from a handout updated by Polly Roach. Copyright 2005 by Mentoring Partnership of Minnesota. Developmental 97
Assets are positive factors within young people, families, communities, schools, and other settings that research has found to be important in promoting young peoples
development. This handout may be reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses only (with this copyright line). From Mentoring for Meaningful Results: Asset-Building
Tips, Tools, and Activities for Youth and Adults. Copyright 2006 by Search InstituteSM; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org.
FOR MENTORS & MENTEES
46
Experiences I Might What I Might Need Ways I Could Find Out What Else I Might Need
Want in My Life to Know About about These Things to Make It Happen
CONTINUES
98
SETTING AND REACHING GOALS 46
Experiences I Might What I Might Need Ways I Could Find Out What Else I Might Need
Want in My Life to Know About about These Things to Make It Happen
Adapted from Take it to the Next Level: Making Your Life What You Want It to Be, copyright 2004 by Search Institute. Developmental AssetsTM are positive factors within 99
young people, families, communities, schools, and other settings that research has found to be important in promoting young peoples development. This handout may
be reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses only (with this copyright line). From Mentoring for Meaningful Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and Activities for
Youth and Adults. Copyright 2006 by Search InstituteSM; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org.
HANDOUTS FOR
FAMILIES OF MENTEES
esearch shows that the presence of a sup- thank the new friend in their childs life. Even if
R portive family in a mentees life can signi- your program serves a population with limited fam-
cantly enhance the effectiveness of the mentoring ily involvement, the Developmental Assets are use-
relationship. However, parents and guardians may ful in helping parents or caregivers recognize that
not fully grasp just how much their encouragement mentoring can be a powerful strategy for enhanc-
(or lack of it) can inuence the relationships suc- ing their childs positive development.
cess. Preparing families to contribute positively to Because you probably have less contact with
the mentoring experience is another important them, the families of mentees may be one of your
challenge you face as a program provider. toughest audiences to reach. The tools offered here
The following set of handouts will help fami- will open the door to their supportive involvement.
lies see how valuable their contributions are. As When families identify themselves as an impor-
parents or caregivers learn more about the role of tant part of a childs mentoring team, the experi-
a mentor and this opportunity to help their child ence becomes more rewarding and meaningful for
grow, they may learn to welcome, celebrate, and everyone involved.
101
FOR FAMILIES OF MENTEES
47
A MENTOR IS . . .
. . . a friend. Like peer friendships, mentors and mentees do things together that are fun and
engaging. They teach each other. They help each other. Theyre honest with each other. And
sometimes they need to have hard conversations about concerns they may have.
. . . a role model. A mentor should try to set a good example for how your child can live his life.
This is not the same as being perfect. Rather, mentors should admit their imperfections and
share their strengths.
. . . someone your child can talk to. Your child may tell her mentor things she does not feel com-
fortable telling you or anyone else. Sometimes she may tell the mentor about hopes, dreams, or
fears. Other times she may reveal mistakes she has made. The mentors role is to be supportive
of your child as a person with many life possibilities, regardless of the kinds of actions or atti-
tudes she condes.
. . . another person who is proud of your child. Your childs mentor should be able to see all the
gifts he has and help him learn and grow. The mentor can help him channel his gifts toward actions
that make a positive difference to others in your family, neighborhood, school, or community.
CONTINUES
102
THE MENTORS ROLE IN YOUR CHILDS LIFE 47
A MENTOR IS NOT . . .
. . . a mentor to the family. The mentors role is to provide special attention to one child, your
child. While getting acquainted with you and your childs siblings can help the mentor better
understand your child, his energy and attention should only be focused on your child.
. . . a social worker or doctor. If your child tells the mentor about experiences or health condi-
tions that concern her, the mentor may turn to professionals for help. It is not a mentors respon-
sibility to try to address conditions or situations that require professional help.
. . . a savior. Certainly the mentors support can help your child overcome hurdles. But mentors
should know that all young peopleregardless of their circumstanceshave gifts and talents
that make them more than just receivers of services. The mentor should treat your child as
though he has much to offer to the world, because he does.
Your role in your childs mentoring relationship more likely their relationship will be a healthy and
is also important. The more supportive you are, the successful one.
YOU CAN BE . . .
. . . a good listener. Share in your childs excitement and concerns about her mentor.
. . . a schedule keeper. Help your child plan time with his mentor, and nd ways to remind him
about upcoming meetings.
. . . a voice of gratitude. Help your child show her appreciation to her mentor. Find ways to show
your appreciation.
Developmental Assets are positive factors within young people, families, communities, schools, and other settings that research has found to be important in promoting 103
young peoples development. This handout may be reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses only (with this copyright line). From Mentoring for Meaningful
Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and Activities for Youth and Adults. Copyright 2006 by Search InstituteSM; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org.
FOR FAMILIES OF MENTEES
48
CONTINUES
104
SUPPORTING YOUR CHILDS RELATIONSHIP WITH A MENTOR 48
Give your childs mentor copies of school so that the mentor and mentee are together for
calendars so that he knows about time off for a limited time. If the relationship is strong and
holidays, opening and closing days of the school life remains relatively stable for the mentor
year, special events, and other considerations. and your child, it may not end until your child
The program may take care of this, but its graduates from high school. The fact that your
always a good idea to provide your childs childs mentor has gone through a recruitment,
mentor with emergency contact information training, and screening process is a good sign
for someone with a phone, just in case that she is committed to staying involved with
something happens and the mentor cannot your child over a signicant period of time.
reach you. Unfortunately, sometimes things change in
either the mentors or your childs life that are
Let the mentoring programs staff or your
out of either ones control, and a relationship
childs mentor know if there has been a
change or incident in your childs home life
may need to end prematurely. Remember that
that the mentor should know about. Did you
sometimes a mentoring relationship ends in a
two have a particularly bad ght recently? Has healthy way for good reasons. For example, your
there been a death in the family? Are there child may get swamped with school activities
nancial stresses in the household right now? like band and sports, or the mentor may be busy
Is one of her siblings in need of extra attention with a new baby. No matter what the reason, you
right now? This kind of information will help can be ready to listen and provide extra support
the program and the mentor to more effectively when the relationship ends.
support your child. You may also want to make Remember that the mentor is not going to
some suggestions about how the mentor can be replace you. You are still your childs parent,
supportive in these situations. and nothing will ever change that. The mentor
Be prepared in the back of your mind for the
can complement and reinforce what you are
inevitable end to the mentoring relationship.
doing as a parent, helping you be even more
Every mentoring relationship ends at some effective.
point. Some mentoring programs are designed
Developmental Assets are positive factors within young people, families, communities, schools, and other settings that research has found to be important in promoting 105
young peoples development. This handout may be reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses only (with this copyright line). From Mentoring for Meaningful
Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and Activities for Youth and Adults. Copyright 2006 by Search InstituteSM; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org.
FOR FAMILIES OF MENTEES
49
Mixed Feelings
What If My Child Seems to Like the has engaged in negative behaviors that close
Mentor Better Than Me? doors to future opportunities.
Sure, youre already convinced that having a men- The mentor can never replace you. You are
tor will be a wonderful experience for your child; still your childs primary caregiver, and nothing
however, you may also feel a little worried that will ever change that. When your child feels
the mentor has it easier than you, the parent or affection toward another person, that doesnt
caregiver. The mentors main role is to be your mean his love for you is lessened. You and
childs friend, someone who gets to swoop in for your child have a history together that cannot
a few hours a week to have fun with your child. be replaced by someone, however caring, who
You are still left with the day-to-day necessities of spends a few hours a week with your child.
being your childs parent, like making sure he does The mentor can actually strengthen what
his homework, stays healthy, is well behaved, and you are doing as a family by reinforcing your
completes household chores. Even when you know rules, helping you be even more effective. If you
how important your role is, it can be difcult to dont communicate with the mentor directly,
feel like the bad guy who enforces all of the rules ask program staff to pass along your familys
and doesnt get to have fun. rules about curfews, eating sweets, watching
Its very natural that a parent or caregiver of a movies, or other issues that concern you.
child who is involved with a mentor may feel a little
The mentor may improve the relationship
jealous or worry about losing some of the childs
between you and your child. As your child
affection to this new person in her life. Share your
feelings with the staff at the mentoring program, talks things over with another adult, she may
and ask if they have any advice for you. If you start learn new communication skills. A caring
to worry that your child will like her mentor better mentor may also be able to help her recognize
than she does you, remind yourself of these things: positive things about her family.
You can set aside your own special time
Young people who have more caring adults
together. When you and your child nd time
in their life do better in school, get involved
in fewer risky behaviors, and are more likely
to have fun with each other, you may feel better
to become caring, healthy, and responsible about the time he spends with his mentor.
adults. Research shows that your childs Even if you simply make dinner together, you
successful involvement with a mentor can boost can spend the time telling jokes and having
her or his odds of becoming an adult who has meaningful conversations.
numerous options in life, rather than one who
106 Developmental Assets are positive factors within young people, families, communities, schools, and other settings that research has found to be important in promoting
young peoples development. This handout may be reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses only (with this copyright line). From Mentoring for Meaningful
Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and Activities for Youth and Adults. Copyright 2006 by Search InstituteSM; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org.
FOR FAMILIES OF MENTEES
50
CONTINUES
107
50 WHAT ARE DEVELOPMENTAL ASSETS?
108 Adapted from Your Family: Using Simple Wisdom in Raising Your Children; copyright 2003 by Search Institute. Developmental Assets are positive factors within
young people, families, communities, schools, and other settings that research has found to be important in promoting young peoples development. This handout may
be reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses only (with this copyright line). From Mentoring for Meaningful Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and Activities for
Youth and Adults. Copyright 2006 by Search InstituteSM; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org.
FOR FAMILIES OF MENTEES
51
Ask your child questions. Whether or not your If you see the mentor, ask for her or his
child acts as if she wants to talk to you, asking perspective on what the pair has been up
her about what is going on in her life shows her to. You might learn different details your child
you care. didnt think to share.
Keep asking. If you ask after every visit your
child has with his mentor, regardless of the
reaction you get, your child will at least know
you care about what is happening in the
relationship.
Developmental Assets are positive factors within young people, families, communities, schools, and other settings that research has found to be important in promoting 109
young peoples development. This handout may be reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses only (with this copyright line). From Mentoring for Meaningful
Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and Activities for Youth and Adults. Copyright 2006 by Search InstituteSM; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org.
FOR FAMILIES OF MENTEES
52
CONTINUES
110
SUPPORTING YOUR CHILD THROUGH THE PHASES OF A MENTORING RELATIONSHIP 52
Common Phases of a Mentoring Relationship is adapted from Growth Cycles of a Match, copyright 2005 by Big Brothers Big Sisters of the Greater Twin Cities. 111
Developmental Assets are positive factors within young people, families, communities, schools, and other settings that research has found to be important in promoting
young peoples development. This handout may be reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses only (with this copyright line). From Mentoring for Meaningful
Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and Activities for Youth and Adults. Copyright 2006 by Search InstituteSM; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org.
FOR FAMILIES OF MENTEES
53
CONTINUES
112
HELPING YOUR CHILD SAY GOOD-BYE TO A MENTOR 53
If the Mentor Initiates the End Explain that sometimes the ending of a
of the Relationship relationship can be a healthy thing in the
long run. It may hurt to end the mentoring
If your child is feeling badly, remind your child
that this outcome is not her fault. relationship right now, but he will get through
this in time. Learning to handle these situations
Remind your child that he is a worthwhile positively is a valuable part of growing up.
person with gifts and strengths.
Developmental Assets are positive factors within young people, families, communities, schools, and other settings that research has found to be important in promoting 113
young peoples development. This handout may be reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses only (with this copyright line). From Mentoring for Meaningful
Results: Asset-Building Tips, Tools, and Activities for Youth and Adults. Copyright 2006 by Search InstituteSM; 800-888-7828; www.search-institute.org.
resources from search institute
Below is a summary of Search Institutes resources that can help you enhance your
mentoring program, as well as support materials you can provide to mentors, men-
tees, and families of mentees. At the time of rst publication of Mentoring for Mean-
ingful Results, these resources were all available. Please check the online catalog
(www.search-institute.org/catalog) or contact client services staff at 1-877-240-7250
to obtain further information.
115
Working Shoulder to Shoulder: Stories and Strategies
of Youth-Adult Partnerships That Succeed
Looking for a way to enhance your organizations involvement
with youth? How about inviting youth to the table? Working
Shoulder to Shoulder is lled with inspiring, true stories about
youth and adult partnerships and practical steps to get posi-
tive relationships started. In their own words, adults and youth
describe the barriers theyve encountered, lessons theyve
learned, and successes theyve shared. The book provides tips, ideas, and practical
wisdom and advice from people engaged in real youth-adult partnerships. Here
youll nd a step-by-step guide to starting and building partnerships.
116
150 Ways to Show Kids You Care /
Los Nios Importan: 150 Maneras de Demostrrselo
Even the simplest acts of kindness can build assets in the lives
of children. This warm, inviting, and colorful book provides
adults easy ideas and meaningful reminders about how they can
show kids they really care. Based on the best-selling poster of
the same name, 150 Ways to Show Kids You Care is the perfect gift for parents, teach-
ers, babysitters, youth workers, yourself, and anyone who touches the lives of kids,
especially those ages 10 and younger. Includes an introduction to the Developmental
Asset categories and 150 ideas in both English and Spanish.
This intimate little book will touch your heart as you read poi-
gnant and practical real words from teensdescribing what
they really want from the caring adults in their lives. Let me
share my worries with you . . . Never give up on me . . . Encour-
age me more, criticize me less. A perfect gift book for anyone who touches the lives
of teens. Based on the popular In Our Own Words posters.
117
RESOURCES FOR MENTEES
Parents dont have to be all things at all times for their teens, and
many teens yearn for more warm, trusting relationships with car-
ing adults. In Connect 5, author (and mother) Kathleen Kimball-
Baker provides hope, encouragement, and practical advice for par-
ents and caregivers who wish to reach out and help their teens con-
nect with other responsible and supportive adults, a critical factor in their healthy
development.
118
Parenting at the Speed of Teens:
Positive Tips on Everyday Issues
Parenting at the Speed of Teens is a practical, easy-to-use guide that
offers positive, commonsense strategies for dealing with both the
everyday issues of parenting teenagersjunk food, the Internet,
stress, jobs, friendsand other serious issues teens may encoun-
terdepression, divorce, racism, substance abuse. It illustrates
how the daily little things, such as talking one-on-one, setting boundaries, offering
guidance, and modeling positive behavior, make a big difference in helping a teen-
ager be successful during these challenging, exciting years of adolescence.
119
Your Family: Using Simple Wisdom in Raising Your Children
All families need as much condence and support as they can get.
This compact booklet helps parents and caregivers reect on their
important roleand the power they haveto bring good things
into the lives of their children. By introducing the concept of
Developmental Assets as simple wisdom supported by compelling
research, the booklet is a perfect tool for strengthening the posi-
tive qualities of families. It concisely provides parents and care-
givers with easy-to-follow summaries of the eight asset categories and what these
areas of development mean to their children.
120
E D UC AT I O N / M ENTO R I N G
Captures the challenges faced by mentormentee pairs and provides a wealth of information for program
coordinators, mentors, mentees, and the families of mentees.
Cindy Sturtevant, Director, MENTORs National Mentoring Institute
Gives a good overview as to how mentoring works and how to understand the 40 Developmental Assets
in relationship buildingvery critical!
Holly Choon Hyang Pettman, Mentor, Big Brothers Big Sisters of the Greater Twin Cities
Far and away the most useful resource for mentors, mentees, parents, and mentoring programs currently
available . . . sure to improve and advance mentoring programs in schools, organizations, and communities
across the country. Mark Tappan, Professor of Education and Human Development, Colby College
hat can you do to reenergize your and communities starting new mentoring programs
W mentoring program? How should busy or seeking fresh ideas to enhance an existing
mentors make the most of their time with program. Topics include:
mentees? What strategies can mentees use for Mentor recruitment
communicating with their mentors? What is the
The role of a mentor
role of parents and caregivers in the mentoring
relationship? Packed with the answers to Conversation starters for
these questions and many more, Mentoring for mentormentee pairs
Meaningful Results is the perfect roadmap to the Low-cost activity ideas
mentoring experience.
Parental support for the
Comprehensive in scope and organized
mentoring relationship
around common mentoring issues, Mentoring for
Meaningful Results addresses the needs of the Based on Search Institutes Developmental
entire mentoring team: program leaders, mentors, AssetsTM, a powerful research framework for under-
mentees, and the families of mentees. Over 50 standing healthy youth development, the content
easy-to-use, reproducible handouts help program focuses on strengths and positive outcomes for
leaders speak to each participant with practical everyone involved. More than a simple how-to
tools they can distribute in their programs. This book, this manual promises to enrich programs and
book is a must-have for schools, organizations, improve relationships for countless mentoring pairs.
#302 $27.95