1. Detach yourself emotionally.

Most of the emotions that grow

out of negative situations are negative. When you refuse to be
engaged emotionally, the situation becomes emotionally neutral.
That means that you can cope with it rationally instead of reacting
to it emotionally. This also changes how the experience is recorded
in your memory and nervous system.

2. Forget about asking why. You can ask why later, for now focus
on asking, Whats the best way to cope with this challenge? Your
mind loves to solve problems. By asking whats the best way to
cope you are telling your mind that there is a workable solution to
be found. It will immediately go to work looking for the very best
solution. This keeps your focus on creating a positive outcome.
3. Look for the value. There is almost always some value in
challenging situations. The more we train ourselves to see the value
in every experience, the more resourceful we will be when those
experiences are challenging and unexpected. The truth is that we
grow from facing challenges more than we would without them. I
know, sometimes there are growing pains involved, but thats just
tuition in the school of life.
4. Ask for help. We cant always get ourselves out of a mess. Dont
be afraid to ask those who are more knowledgeable for help or
direction. Most of the time they are glad to help or at least point you
in the right direction. For example. with regard to running this
website, I am not the most tech savvy guy around, so when I need
help, I ask. The willingness of others to lend assistance is
heartwarming.
5. Remember, its temporary. One way or another, you will get
through it. Every situation has a conclusion. Even if its not the
conclusion you wanted, at least it will be over and you can start
from there. If you have to rebuild some aspect of your life, you will
probably do it better and faster than you did the last time.
6. As long as youre at it, upgrade. If something in your life falls
apart, turn it to your advantage. One way to do this is by using your
energy to upgrade rather than repair. Granted, this isnt always
feasible, but when it is, it provides you with the opportunity to turn a
setback into progress. So, the end result will put you ahead of
where you were and that will mean that you actually benefited from
the experience.
7. Role play. This is an effective tactic for removing yourself
emotionally from a frustrating challenge. Pretend that you have
been called in to handle the situation because of your calm and
logical demeanor. The person facing the challenge needs someone
who is cool and capable to cope with it, and thats why you are
there.
8. Take rescue remedy. Maybe youve never heard of Rescue
Remedy, let me tell you this is some good stuff. Its a flower remedy
developed by Dr. Edward Bach. Flower remedies work on a very
subtle level to help with a wide array of emotional issues. As you
can tell from the name, Rescue Remedy is there to rescue you
during periods of emotional stress.
9. Laugh your way through it. Sometimes things get so ridiculous
that its almost laughable. When that happens, go ahead and laugh.
When you laugh at a stressful situation it provides a healthy outlet
for your emotions. Laughter is a much better way to release that
emotional stress and cope with a challenge than anger is.
10. Dont take it personal. At times it can feel like you have been
singled out to receive more than your share of hardships.
 Everybody faces more than enough challenges. The universe has
not conspired against you. Sometimes bad stuff just happens.
Taking things personally just leads to excuses and blame and a
whole host of other worthless thoughts and emotions. Dont even go
there, just learn to cope with it and move on.

Learning to roll with the punches

I wish I could say that at some point in your personal development
bad things will never happen again. That would be nice, but I prefer
to keep it real. How you cope with the challenges you face says a
lot about your emotional maturity and true nature. Learning a few
simple skills to help you cope resourcefully will help you
turn challenges into opportunities. Having a positive perspective in
this area will go a long way toward improving the quality of this
journey we call life.
How do you cope with your challenges?
Do you have a favorite skill that help you cope?
How do you feel about change?
Share your thoughts on facebook or google+

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How to Face Challenges

Two Parts:Tackling the ProblemChanging Your

PerceptionsCommunity Q&A
Everyone faces challenges in their life. Even people that seem like
everything comes so easily to them. So how does everyone cope?
How to you keep from just giving up and moving to Antigua? We'll
help you change your outlook with a few coping skills and strategies
and we'll walk you through the steps you need to take in order to
tackle that challenge like a champ.
1
Part

Tackling the Problem

1.

1
Accept that this challenge is happening. A lot of people will dismiss challenges
that come before them. Theyll convince themselves that the problem is smaller than
it really is or that it doesnt exist in the first place. You need to recognize when you
start thinking this way because its true what they say: the first step in overcoming a
problem is admitting that you have one.
This isnt a fun part of the equation. Accepting that this challenge is real and that
youre going to have to deal with it can be really scary. If youre scared of what this
challenge can mean for you, just remember: so far in life, youve met every challenge
thats come before you and made it out okay. Theres no reason to think that this is
any different.
2.

2
Take action. Its important, with any challenge that you end up facing, to start doing
something about the problem as soon as you possibly can. Each moment of inaction
becomes an action in itself. By doing nothing, youre still doing something. And that
something probably isnt helping the situation. Problems usually multiply when left to
themselves, like rabbits. The sooner you start facing the challenge, the easier it will
be to overcome.
3.

3
Evaluate the facts. So, youre ready to start tackling this challenge? Great! The best
place to start is by evaluating the facts. What do you really know about whats going
on? Are you sure you understand the situation? Dont just deal with what you think
the problem is; the real issue might be something you didnt even realize was a
problem. Take some time to make sure that you understand the situation as fully as
possible.
This usually means that youre going to have to talk to people, although who will
depend on your situation. Are you having problems with school? Talk to your
teacher. Problems at work? Talk to your boss or a coworker. Problems in your
relationship? Talk to your partner. Problems with your health? Talk to your doctor.
You get the idea.
 It can help to make a list. A challenge is rarely one single task or problem, but is
instead made up of lots of different parts. Make a list talking about what the smaller,
sub-challenges are and what youll need to do in order to combat them.

4.

4
Take account of what you have. Now that you know what youre dealing with, youll
want to think about what tools and resources you have available to help you in facing
this challenge. What resources are most important will depend on your problem, but
there are lots of things you can consider. Think about your strengths, the people that
can help you, and any physical resources you might have (like money). You should
also think about areas in which you are weak. This will let you plan ahead so that
you can compensate or at least be prepared in areas where something might go
wrong. Be realistic about both the good and bad things that you have to offer this
situation: fantastic optimism is not your friend here.
 For example, lets say that youre facing a challenge in your marriage. What do you
have that can help you face this? Well, youre good at communicating how you feel.
Thats important for reaching understanding in interpersonal issues. You also have
your parents available to you, as theyve managed to stay together through some
pretty serious fights. They might have some advice. You also know that youre not
good at changing your habits, so youll know that youll need to be prepared to pay
extra attention to that.

5.

5
Find more information. Now that you know about what the facts of the situation and
what you have available to you, you can start finding information that can help you.
Find out more about the challenge youre facing. Talk to people that have faced the
same challenge. The more you know about the facts, similar situations, and the
 experiences of others, the easier time youll have making smart decisions about
facing your own challenge. Itll also help keep you from feeling alone.
You can find a lot of information by going online and using Google to find websites
that deal with your specific problem.
For example, lets say that youre facing a challenge at work; you are up for review
and youre worried that your performance has been poor. Now, go to Google and
search for performance reviews. Youll learn about the process and hear how things
have gone for other people. You can also learn about what you can do to improve
your chances for keeping your job if your review goes badly.

6.

6
Look at all possibilities. When were worried, we tend to see only a few paths out
of a challenge. You might see your situation as either I do this or I do that.
However, this is rarely an accurate view of the situation and thinking of it in this way
 can often be harmful to your decision-making process. Challenge your ideas of what
is really necessary to the situation or what your options really are. Find the paths
between the ones that are so clearly marked in your mind. You may find that a
middle road or a total detour is better for you in the long run, even if it doesnt match
what you thought the situation would be.
If youre having a hard time looking at a situation and finding an alternative route,
one of the easiest ways to get ideas is to talk to someone you trust. Get advice. If
youre on your own though, look at you main goal point (the thing youre trying to
reach). Its got a problem in the way, keeping you from getting there, right? Now,
look at the actual function of the goal. Is there another way to get the same thing to
happen? This can open another path for you to take.

7.

7
 Communicate, communicate, communicate. If the challenge youre facing in any
way involves other people, then a large part of your challenge can be dealt with by
talking to other people. Most of our problems come up in the first place because we
fail to communicate in the way that we should.
For example, lets say that youre having problems in your relationship. The best way
to solve relationship problems is to talk to your significant other. Be honest about
how you feel and what you want and encourage them to do the same. If they wont
talk with you, well that kind of answers the question, doesnt it?
Another example would be if youre having problems at school. Talk to your teacher
or the schools counselor. No matter what the problem is, one of them should have
some ideas that can help you. You might think that they might be mad at you, judge
you, or make things worse, but that is very likely not true. Youre very unlikely to tell
them something that would surprise them and theyll have a lot more experience in
handling the problem and will probably have some good ideas for you.

8.
 8
Look for a mentor. When youre facing a challenge, one thing you can do to really
transform your experience of the situation is to find a mentor. This can be a person,
a website, a book: anything that can give you advice on your specific situation and
inspire you to take it like a champ. Having a mentor can make your experience more
positive and help you change how you experience whats happening to you.
For example, if youre having problems with a friend, talk to your older sister. Shell
probably have had similar troubles at some point in her life, so shell be able to give
you advice. Shell also be able to support and comfort you.
Online communities can also fill this role, so dont worry if youre not that great at
talking to people or asking for help face-to-face.

9.

9
 Keep trying until you find a solution. The final key for dealing with challenges in
your life is to just keep trying. You have to be persistent. Without being persistent,
youll frequently find yourself unsuccessful in the things you try. We wont
recommend trying the same approach over and over again but you shouldnt give up
on finding a solution. Every challenge can be met and every situation made better,
so long as you keep your mind open.
Now sometimes the solution to a challenge is accepting the inevitable. Lets say that
your challenge is that youve been diagnosed with a chronic illness. Now, you
shouldnt keep fighting to get rid of the illness. The reality is probably that youre
stuck with it. However, the solution in this situation would be that you should find a
sense of community and identity with others who share your situation and learn to
better embrace and appreciate the good things that you do have in your life.

2
Part

Changing Your Perceptions

1.
 1
Recognize that this too shall pass. So youve got this incredible challenge before
you: now you need to really face it. How do you deal, how do you cope, when this
very upsetting thing is happening to you? Its very important to remember that time
passes and things change. Always. The only constant is that the sun will rise each
morning. Whatever youre dealing with, however terrible and permanent it feels, its
important to remember that you will not always feel this way. Your challenge will not
be there forever. A new reality will form and you will find a way to keep living. Just
keep telling yourself: This too shall pass.
For example, your boyfriend that youve been with since you were young might have
just left you. It will feel horrible, like youll never be happy again and youll never find
someone else that you love that much. It might feel like youll never find anyone. But
time will pass, youll be out at a party, and then suddenly...your prince charming will
walk into the room. Hell be funny and charming and hell think youre just the most
incredible thing to grace this Earth. Itll happen. You just need to be patient and give
it time.
2.

2
Remind yourself of the good things in your life. When bad things happen to us or
when were stressed, we tend to forget about all of the wonderful things that exist in
our lives. No matter how bad things seem, the world really is a wonderful place. Take
account of the good things in your life. Spend time enjoying them and tell the people
that love you how much you love them in return. Not only will this keep you sane
during this challenging time, it might also help you find a way to take on your
challenge.
People sometimes have a hard time seeing the good things in their life. Dont let this
happen to you. You dont have a significant other? You do still have friends and
family. Not much in the way of friends and family? Youre alive and you have the
wonderful opportunity to go out into the world and make friends and have
 experiences. Theres always some incredible experience thats just waiting for you to
get up and take it.

3.

3
Be flexible, always. No matter what challenge youre facing, being flexible will make
a huge difference in helping you face it. See yourself as a tree thats fallen in a river.
You can try to go against the flow, but youll end up struggling and youll bang
against every rock on the way. If instead you go with the flow, change with each
direction that the river wants to take you, youll glide smoothly until it carries you to a
resting place.
4.

4
Find meaning in your life. When you have a goal or find some kind of greater
meaning in your life, youll find that facing any challenge is easier. This is because it
gives you something to work towards, hope for, or will simply inspire you and make
you happy. There are lots of ways to go about this. You can set a goal, like that you
want to buy a house in five years. Some people become more religious and find
comfort in their religious community. Some people volunteer and find strength in
helping others. Find something that works for you.
Finding meaning if you dont have meaning can be tricky. The best way to go about
it, as with most things in life, is to give it a try. When you find the right thing for you,
youll know it. Just keep yourself open to as many possibilities as possible and dont
keep yourself from getting out there and trying things.
5.

5
Let yourself be challenged. Handling stress takes practice. Youll find that you
have an easier time facing challenges if you face more of them. When you keep
yourself sheltered and always take the easy route in life to avoid the challenges,
youll never show yourself that you can in fact face a challenge. Let challenges
happen. Take risks that have promising rewards. Youll find that you can do more
than you give yourself credit for.
Its a bit like learning to ride a bike: you have to get up on the bike and you might get
a few scrapes and bruises while you learn to keep your balance, but each wobble
will teach you something about staying upright. If every time you wobble you get off
the bike and stay off for a few years, youre never going to learn.
6.

6
Be grateful for the challenges you have. When you do face challenges in your life,
be grateful for them. Each challenge you face will teach you more about yourself. It
will become a part of who you are...and that person is an incredible person. You are
unique and wonderful and it is your challenges that have made you that way. You
might be struggling right now but remember, even while youre worrying and upset,
that this challenge is going to make you a better person.
7.

7
Believe in yourself. The most important thing you can do for facing any challenge is
to believe in yourself. When you doubt yourself, youll falter. Youll make poor
decisions. You want to make good decisions! Not believing in yourself can also
powerfully transform what you take away from this experience. Either you believe in
yourself and what you take away is ultimately good and you learn from it...or you
dont believe in yourself and this experience is negative because you see it as a
failure on your part. Which experience would you rather have?
Sometimes, life has been so unkind that we really dont want to believe in ourselves.
Please, dont let your experiences diminish your wonderful spirit. You are so strong.
Look at all the stuff that youve made it through so far! We know that you can face
this challenge and do so with grace. We believe in you and we are so proud of the
person that you are. Just keep trying and dont forget to be awesome.
 Community Q&A
How can I help others face difficulties in life?
wikiHow Contributor

Be a good listener, volunteer your time and offer assistance when needed. Try to
understand the other person's struggles and be a good friend.
Not Helpful 0 Helpful 1

Is it possible to die of stress?

wikiHow Contributor

Stress won't kill you directly, but its effects can be harmful. Stress causes a release
of hormones, including primarily cortisol. Too much exposure to cortisol over time is
associated with deleterious effects on the body, including especially the heart and
brain. There is also some research that links stress with DNA degradation. After a
significant amount of time, you would most likely wind up dying from some kind of
stress related heart disease.
Not Helpful 0 Helpful 1

What should you do if my challenge is with my teacher?

wikiHow Contributor

Sit down with your teacher one-on-one and express your concerns. You can include
a parent and/or guidance counselor in the discussion if need be. Explain you
problems without anger, simply as a situation you'd like to resolve.
Not Helpful 0 Helpful 0

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Tips
Realize that you are most likely not the cause of a certain situation.
(such as a death or job loss)
 Realize that not all negative situations are directed at you! (or only
you!) Some happen for many reasons, and they are just there to
bug you at the least. Do not over think why or how the situations
occurred.

Warnings
If you need guidance on the above steps, contact a counselor, or
trusted level-headed/ grounded friend/colleague. Make sure you are
improving and going down the right path.

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