Teachers of English to Speakers of Other Languages, Inc.

(TESOL)

Complexities of Identity Formation: A Narrative Inquiry of an EFL Teacher

Author(s): Amy B. M. Tsui
Source: TESOL Quarterly, Vol. 41, No. 4 (Dec., 2007), pp. 657-680
Published by: Teachers of English to Speakers of Other Languages, Inc. (TESOL)
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Complexities Formation:
ofIdentity
A NarrativeInquiryofan EFL Teacher
AMY B.M. TSUI
The University
ofHong Kong
Hong Kong SAR, China

This articleexploresteachers'identity formationthrougha narrative

inquiryof theprofessional identityof an EFL teacher,Minfang, in the
People's Republicof China. on
Drawing Wenger's(1998) social theory
ofidentityformation as a dual processofidentificationand negotiation
of meanings,it examinesthe livedexperienceof Minfangas an EFL
learnerand EFL teacherthroughout his 6 yearsof teaching,the pro-
cesses thatwereinvolvedas he struggledwithmultipleidentities, the
interplaybetweenreificationand negotiationof meanings,and the
institutional
construction and hispersonalreconstruction ofidentities.
The storiesofMinfanghighlighted thecomplexrelationships between
membership, and
competence, legitimacy ofaccessto practice;between
theappropriation and ownershipofmeanings,thecentrality ofpartici-
pation,and themediatingrole ofpowerrelationships in theprocesses
of identityformation.

professional is considereda criticalcomponentin

identity
Teachers'
thesocioculturaland sociopoliticallandscapeof the classroomand
in teachers'professionaldevelopment(Varghese,Morgan,Johnston, &
Johnson,2005). In the fieldof TESOL, althoughresearchon teacher
cognition,teacherknowledge,teacherlearning,and teacherdevelop-
menthas burgeonedin thelasttwodecades,onlya verysmallnumberof
studieshavefocusedon teacheridentity (see, e.g.,Duff& Uchida,1997;
Morgan,2004;and Pavlenko,2003). A reviewoftheliterature in thisarea
suggeststhatrelevantstudiesconvergeon threemajorissues.The first
issue is the multidimensionality
or multifaceted natureof professional
identity and the relationshipsbetweenthesedimensionsor facets.Al-
thoughresearchers seem to agree thatprofessional identitiesare multi-
dimensionalor multifaceted, theyhold opposingviewswithregardto
whetherthe "sub-identities" (Mishler,1999, p. 8) should or could be
"harmonized" and "wellbalanced"(Beijaard,Meijer,& Verloop,2004,p.
122) or whetherthe construction of identityis a "continuingsite of
struggle" betweenconflictingidentities(MacLure,1993,p. 313; see also
Lampert,1985; Samuel & Stephens,2000).

TESOL QUARTERLY Vol. 41, No. 4, December 2007 65<7

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 The secondissueis therelationship between thepersonalandsocial
dimensions ofidentity formation. Moststudiesemphasize thepersonal
dimensions, focusing on self-reflection
onwhooneis,whatonewantsto
become,and teachers' personalpractical knowledge (Antonek,McCor-
mick& Donato,1997).However, a number ofresearchers havepointed
out theimportance of theprofessional context, whichis partof the
broadersociocultural and politicalcontext, in shapingteacheridentity
(Duff& Uchida,1997;He, 2002a,2002b,2002c;Reynolds, 1996).
The thirdissue,whichis closely relatedtothesecond,is therelation-
shipbetweenagencyand structure in identityformation. Coldronand
Smith(1999) stresstheimportance ofagencyoversocialstructure and
arguethatthechoicesthatteachers makeconstitute theirprofessional
identities.
On the otherhand,Moore,Edwards,Halpin,& George
(2002)arguethatteachers' activelocationinsocialspacecanbe under-
minedbypoliciesor institutions thatrequireconformity, whichcould
marginalize theirpositionings in thatspace.
littleattention,
Relatively however, hasbeengivento understanding
theprocessesof identity formation, theinterplay betweenthesepro-
cessesand theidentities constituted as teachers positionthemselves.In
thisarticle,
I explorethecomplexprocesses ofteacheridentity forma-
tionthrough a narrative inquiryoftheprofessional identityofan EFL
teacher,Minfang,1 in the People's Republicof China.Drawingon
Wenger's(1998) socialtheory of identity formation, I examineMin-
fang'slivedexperienceof Minfangas an EFL learnerand teacher
throughout his6-year teaching career,theprocesses thatwereinvolved
as he struggledwithmultiple identities,theinterplaybetween reification
andnegotiation ofmeanings, andtheinstitutional constructionandhis
personalreconstruction ofidentities.

METHODOLOGY: NARRATIVE INQUIRY OF

IDENTITY FORMATION

The investigation
ofMinfang's formation
identity as a teacherwascon-
ductedthrough a narrative Connelly
inquiry. and Clandinin (1999)refer
to teachers'professional in
identity termsof "storiesto liveby"(p. 4).
Accordingtothem, stories
provide threadthatteachers
a narrative draw
on tomakesenseoftheirexperience and themselves.AsBeijaardetal.

1To
protectthe real identityof the EFL teacher,Minfang,all personal names,and names
of institutionsare fictitious.The place of originof Minfangwas also deliberatelyvague.
This does not in anywayaffectthe authenticity of the stories,however.The authorwishes
to thankMinfangforsharinghis movingstorieswithher.

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(2004) pointout,"Through teachersengagein narrative
storytelling,
'theorizing' and,basedon that,teachers mayfurther discover andshape
theirprofessional identity in newordifferent
resulting stories"(p. 121).
Minfang's narrative wasconstructed andreconstructed overa periodof
6 months. It startedwithface-to-face whenwemetat a con-
storytelling
ferenceandwascontinued and reshapedthrough Minfang's reflective
diarieswhichhewrote forhimself andsharedwithme.Thesereflections
werefurther reshapedand enrichedas I respondedto his diariesby
sharingmyownexperiences andprobing formoreinformation. Finally,
we had intensive face-to-faceconversationsovera periodofone week
duringwhichMinfang relivedthestoriesthathe had told.Duringthis
period,wemetfourtimesforabout4 hourseachtime.
The analysis of thedatawereconductedin thefollowing manner.
thedataweresortedchronologically
First, fromhischildhoodlearning
experience tohislastyearofteaching beforehe leftforfurther studies.
Second,thedataweresortedaccordingto theidentity conflicts that
Minfang experienced. Forexample,theconflicts he experienced as an
EFL learnerand as an EFL teacherweresortedand therelationships
between theseconflicts wereanalysed. Thisprocessinvolved reorganiz-
ing the flashbacks thathe used as he explainedthe psychological
struggleshe experienced whenhe wasa learnerand a teacher. Finally,
thedatawereanalyzed according to theframework ofthedualprocess
ofidentity formation proposedbyWenger(1998),thatis,identification
and negotiability of meanings. In particular,
thefollowing aspectsare
examined: forms and sourcesofreification, participationand nonpar-
ticipationin reification, andnonnegotiability
negotiability ofmeanings,
andparticipation andnonparticipation in thenegotiationofmeanings.
Again,therelationship between theprocesseswasexamined.
In therestofthisarticle, I presentWenger's framework and a brief
outlineoftheELT landscapein Chinain whichMinfang's storieswere
situatedand interpreted. Next,I analyseand thendiscussthestories.2
Thisarticle concludes byshowing howtheinterplayofidentification and
negotiation of meanings shapesteacheridentity and highlighting the
centralityofparticipation in bothprocesses.

THEORETICAL FRAMEWORK: THE DUAL PROCESS OF

IDENTITY FORMATION
One ofthemostpowerful theoriesofidentity whichillu-
formation,
minatesthe threemajorissuesof teacheridentity
researchoutlined
2 The
excerptsfromthe writtennarrativesby Minfangwillbe presentedverbatimso as to
retaintheoriginalflavor.The conversations
wereconductedin Cantoneseand everyeffort
was made to keep the Englishtranslationas close to Cantonese as possible.

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earlier,is thatproposed by Wenger (1998). In Wenger'sframework,
one's identitydoes not lie onlyin the wayone talksor thinksabout
oneself,or onlyin thewayotherstalkor thinkaboutone, butin theway
one's identityis lived day-to-day. Wengerproposesthatidentitiesare
formedamid the "tensionbetweenour investment in thevariousforms
of belongingand our abilityto negotiatethe meaningsthatmatterin
thosecontexts"(p. 188). Therefore,identity formation is a dual process
of identificationand negotiationofmeanings.By identification, he means
theinvestment ofselfin buildingassociationsand differentiations. Iden-
tificationis reificative:
We identify,
or are beingidentified, as belonging
to sociallyorganizedcategories,roles,and so on.3It is also participative:
Itis thelivedexperienceofbelongingthatconstitutes whowe are.There-
fore,identification is both relationaland experiential.

Identification

Wenger(1998) proposesthreemodesofbelongingas the sourcesof

identification:
engagement, imagination, and alignment. Engagementin
is a
practice powerful source ofidentificationin that it involves
investing
ourselvesin whatwe do as wellas in our relationswithothermembers
of the community.It is throughrelatingourselvesto otherpeople that
we geta senseofwhowe are; it is throughengagingin practicethatwe
findout how we can participatein activitiesand the competencere-
quired.
Anothersourceofidentification is imagination. Imaginationis a pro-
cessofrelatingourselvesto theworldbeyondthecommunity ofpractice
in whichwe are engaged and seeingour experienceas located in the
broadercontextand as reflective of the broaderconnections.Imagina-
tionis "theproductionofimagesoftheselfand imagesoftheworldthat
transcendengagement"(Wenger,1998,p. 177). However,imagination,
Wengerobserves,can also lead to stereotyping whenpracticeis notfully
understoodand whenovergeneralizations are made on thebasisofspe-
cificpractices.
The thirdsourceofidentification is alignment.It is a processin which

refers
Wenger'sconceptof reification to givingconcreteformto something whichis ab-
Forexample,theblindfolded
stract. womanholdinga scaleis a reification the
ofjustice,
awardofa certificate
toan individual ofthelearning
at theendofa courseisa reification
experience individual
thatthisparticular hasgonethrough. AsWengerpointsout,reifi-
cationisa processinwhich"aspectsofhumanexperience andpracticearecongealedinto
fixedforms andgiventhestatusofobject"(p. 59). In otherwords,
through the
reification
meanings producedbyourexperience areprojected intoan independent
andconcretized
existence. oftheconceptofreification,
(Fora detailedexposition see Wenger, 1998,pp.
58-62,287.)

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participantsin a community becomeconnectedbybringingtheiractions
and practicesin line witha broaderenterprise. It is throughalignment
thatthe identityof a large group such as an institution becomes the
identityofitsparticipants.Alignment allowsus to see theeffectiveness
of
our actionsbeyondour ownengagement.It involvespowerand,as such,
it is oftenachieved througha complex interplayof complianceand
allegiance.Wenger (1998) pointsout thatalignmentachievedpurely
throughcoercionand oppressionnotonlyaffects our identities
butalso
leads to dissociationand alienation.

Negotiationof Meanings

The otherprocessofidentity formation is thenegotiation ofmeanings

thatare definedin the processesof identification. The negotiabilityof
meanings,accordingto Wenger(1998), determinestheextentto which
one is able to contributeto and shape the meaningsin whichone is
invested;itis therefore
fundamental to identity formation.Meaningsare
producedin theprocessofparticipation and theycompeteforthedefi-
nitionof events,actions,and so forth.Some meaningshave morecur-
rencythanothersbecause of the different relationsof powerbetween
thosewho producedthem(see also Freeman& Johnson,1998). Their
relativevalues,however,are subjectto negotiation.People claimowner-
ship over the meaningsproduced in the sense of being able to use,
modify, and appropriatethemas theirown.Ownershipof meaningsis
increasedifmanypeople participate in thenegotiationprocess.Wenger
refersto theprocessesin whichthevalue of meaningsis determinedas
the "economiesof meanings"(p. 197). Wengerpointsout thatthe in-
abilityto negotiateand claimownershipof meanings,oftenbecause of
asymmetrical powerrelations,can createan identity ofnonparticipation
and marginality. The appropriationofmeaningscan alienatethosewho
producedthe originalmeaningswhen theyfindthemselves unable to
reclaimthe meaningstheyproduced.
In a community ofpractice,engagementin thenegotiationofmean-
ingsinvolvestheproductionand adoptionofmeanings:The twomustgo
together.Memberswhosemeaningsare consistently rejectedand whose
experiencesare consideredirrelevant,and hence notacceptedas a form
of competence,willdevelopan identity of marginality.
Wenger'stheoryofidentity formation just outlinedprovidesa power-
fulframework forexploringthemajorissuesdelineatedat thebeginning
of thisarticleand formakingsense of the livedcomplexity of teachers'
professionalidentityformation.In the followingsection,I presenta
narrative inquiryof Minfang'sprofessional identityformation.

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A NARRATIVE INQUIRY OF MINFANG'S
IDENTITY FORMATION

EFL Landscape in China: Deaf-and-dumbEnglishand

CommunicativeLanguage Teaching

SinceChinaadoptedan open door economicpolicyin 1978,the

dramatic increasein theneedtouseEnglishinface-to-face interactions
withforeignersthrew intoquestiontheprevalentEFL teaching method-
ologiesat thetime.Thesemethodologies consistedofa combination of
Chinesetraditions oflearning,suchas intensive
study andrecitation of
andwestern
texts, influences,
includinggrammar-translation,extensive
and intensivereading, linguistic and thestudyofliterary
analysis, texts
(Burnaby & Sun,1989).University graduateswerefoundto be highly
competent inwritingandgrammar, butpoorin speaking andlistening.
In 1986,the then-State EducationCommission (nowthe Ministry of
Education)conducted in 15 provinces
a nationalsurvey and cities,and
thefindings revealedthatmostmiddle-schoolgraduates foundithardto
converseinsimpleEnglish evenafter 900hoursoflearning (Liu,1995).
The termdeaf-and-dumb
English[lungya has been used to describe
yingyu]
theEnglishtaught in China.
in schoolsand universities
To addresstheproblem, a largenumber ofnativespeakers ofEnglish
havebeenrecruitedsincetheeighties fromtheWestto teachEnglish,
mainlyin universities,
and theyhavebeenreferred to as foreign
experts.
Communicative languageteaching(CLT) wasintroduced to Chinain
thiscontext
and takenon boardinitiallybya smallteamofprofessors
whoproduceda textbook seriesbasedon thisapproach, calledCommu-
nicative forChinese
English In 1980,theseriesbecamepartofthe
Learners.
StateEducationCommission's (latertheMinistryofEducation)5-year
planforproducing highereducationforeignlanguagecurriculum ma-
and thetextbook
terials, serieswasfurther developedjointlywiththe
Councilanda number
British fromtheWestactingas
ofELT specialists
advisors.In 1985,theMinistryofEducation recommended itfornation-
wideadoption.Thisserieshas wonnumerous awardsat nationaland
provinciallevels.
The adoptionofCLT in Chinawashighly at thetime.
controversial
Questionswereraisedaboutthe appropriateness of a methodology
rootedin Western forChineselearners
cultures withdifferentcultural
backgrounds. In someuniversities,
CLT wasvigorously promoted and
theprevailing methodologieswerelumpedunderthetermtraditional
method (TM), as opposedto CLT whichwasconsidered a newmethod
and approach.It wasin theELT context justdescribedthatMinfang's
livedexperience ofEFL learningand teachingwassituated.

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Minfang'sEFL Learner Identities:Social and Educational

Minfangwasbornin a poor villagein a minority regionon theeve of

China's open door economicpolicyin the midseventies. His familywas
originally from Guangdong but his father, a medical professor, was
posted to thisregionduringthe CulturalRevolution(1966-1976) for
re-educationby peasants.Like mostpeople in China, the familywent
througha greatdeal ofhardship;resourcesforlivingand educationwere
scarce.
Minfang'sfatherwas verystrictwithhis two children.From a very
youngage, Minfangand his sisterhad to finishtaskssuch as practicing
Chinesecalligraphy, recitingclassicalChinesepoems,doing theirmul-
tiplication tables, and copyingthe Englishalphabetbeforetheywere
allowedto havetheirmeals.Theyworkedveryhard,and theywereboth
top studentsin the province'sbest school. In Minfang'sparents'eyes,
goingto university wastheonlywayto escape poverty. LearningEnglish
was highlyvalued because it offeredthe possibility of going overseas,
whichwas generallyreferredto as gettinggold-plated* Therefore,his
parents were delighted when Minfang was admitted to Nanda, a presti-
giousuniversity in the Guangdongprovince thathas a strongreputation
foritsEnglishlanguageteaching.
Minfang'sfirstyearat Nanda was a "painful"experience.Firstof all,
he spoke a dialect that,althoughmutuallyintelligiblewithstandard
Cantonese,madehimfeelas thoughhe soundedlikea country bumpkin
to thecityfolksin Guangzhou.His peersnicknamedhimBrotherFang
aftera TV characterwhowas a caricatureof an immigrant froma poor
innerregionlivingoffhis relativesin an affluent city.His classmates
made funofhimbymimicking thewayhe spokeand acted.He feltthat
not onlywas his Englishpoor, but his communicationstylewas also
different.He wrotein his narrative, "Mostof the studentsfromGuang-
zhou wereverytalkative and communicative, using'sandwichedEnglish'
in theirdailyconversation, thatis, code-switching betweenCantonese
and Englishin class. Comparedwiththem,I was an inertand quiet
countrybumpkinwho was ignorantof thiscosmopolitanfad."He was
scared of going to class because he could not followthe teacher'sin-
structions. For thefirst3 months,theteachersconstantly remindedhim
thathe was on the wrongpage. He was sent to eveningclassesin the
languagelaboratory tailoredforstudentswithpoor listeningand speak-
ing skills.
Despite his good knowledgeof Englishgrammarand good
writtenEnglish,he was stigmatizedas the "deaf-and-dumb English

4
Gettinggold-plated(dujiri) is a Chinese expressioncommonlyused to referto people
gettingqualificationsoverseasand therebyadding value to themselves.

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learner"with"specialneeds." Nevertheless,he embracedthe opportu-
nitybecause he had neverbeen in a languagelaboratorybefore,and he
consideredit a golden opportunityto improvehis English.

LearnerIdentity
Reconstructing

Minfangworkedhard to be accepted by the learnercommunity at

Nanda. He startedsocializingin the local Cantonesecommunity and
learningto speakstandardCantonese,code-mixing and pickingup Can-
toneseslang,whichtookabout a year.
Aftersettling intotheCantoneseculture,I foundmyself minglingvery
wellwiththecommunity; myroommates lendingme Englishmagazines
and myclassmates helpingme withmypronunciation. The communica-
tiveEnglishteacher(thatis,theteacherresponsible forteachingCLT)
evensenta bag ofcrackers to mydormitoryhearingthatI did notknow
the Englishword'crackers.'Whileenjoyingthe crackerswithme, my
roommates urgedme to tellthe teacherthatI did not knowtheword
'watermelon' nexttime.Althoughtheydid itjokingly,I washappythat
they talked
tome like
an which
insider, made me feel and assured.
affiliated
In the restof the year,therefore,/ couldcompletely on mystudies
concentrate
andI evenwonthefirstprizeinthepronunciation contest
andintonation
at theend oftheyear.(Emphasisadded)

and Reclaiming
Appropriating MeaningsofEFL Learning

Investinghisselfin hisrelationswithhispeersconstituted one aspect

of Minfang'sidentity. The otherequallyimportant aspectwas investing
his selfin whathe did as an EFL learner.Nanda offeredtwoparallel
coursesin the firstyear,IntensiveEnglish,whichwas intendedto help
studentsmastervocabulary, grammarand syntax, and CLT, whichaimed
to developstudents'communicative abilities.However,the CLT course
took up sevenlessonsa week,whereasIntensiveEnglishtook up only
fourlessons.
AlthoughMinfangdid verywellin English,he wasnotable to identify
his learningwiththe CLT approachmuch celebratedin his university.
He describedtheteachingstyleas "softand unrealistic" and wasskeptical
about the basic assumptions of CLT. It was "soft"because thelinguistic
pointswerenot made entirelyexplicitin the communicative activities.
Studentscould finisha host of activitieswithoutknowinghow these
wererelatedto the languagesystemand whatwas learned.It
activities
was"unrealistic" because itrequiredtheteacherto havepragmaticcom-
petence.Minfangpointedout thatmostofhis teachershad neverinter-
actedwithnativespeakersofEnglish,had nevergone overseas,and had
neverfoundthemselves in a situationwheretheyhad to use Englishfor

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dailyinteraction. It was therefore
unrealisticto expectthemto evaluate
theappropriateness utterancesand communication
of More-
strategies.
over,he feltthattheseactivitiescarriedunderlying culturalassumptions
whichrequiredstudentsto assume different personae if theywere to
participatefully.For example,instantaneous oral participation in class
requiredstudentsto expressopinions spontaneouslywithoutcareful
thinking.For Minfang,thisactivity wentagainstthe Chinese culture,
whichattachesa greatdeal ofimportanceto makingthoughtful remarks
and not babblingbeforeone has thoughtthingsthrough.
NeitherMinfangnorhisclassmates feltthattheyhad learnedmuchin
the CLT lessons.Minfangdefinedlearningas beingable to understand
whathe was readingand doing and to clarify whathe did not under-
stand.He likedIntensiveEnglishwhichrequiredrigoroustextand gram-
maticalanalysesand learningnewvocabulary. These learningtasksmade
himfeelthathe had learnedsomethingsolid. He wrote,
I loathedthe communicative activities
withloud studentshuddlingto-
getherand performing mini-dramas.
The teachertoldus thattheactivi-
tiesweredesignedto helpus developcommunicative competence, butI
just could notunderstand whywe should staytogether in
[sitting groups]
and call outloudlyto learn.
Forhim,theCLT classroomwas"a battlefield" inwhichtheteacherfired
questionsat thestudents and the studentshad to shieldthemselves with
answers.He added,"I liketo learnindividuallyand enjoytheautonomy of
being myself. On the surface I did not defy CLT and [was] actively
engagedin the activities,but / knewwhatI likedand disliked'(emphasis
added).
CLT as "CruelLanguageTeaching"
Minfanghad a clearidea ofhowhe wouldlearnbest,buthe also knew
thathe needed to cope withthedemandsoftheCLT teacher.His coping
strategywasto distinguishbetweenwhathe called the"regular"and the
"peripheral"timeslots."Regular"timeslotswereperiodsof timewhen
he wasable to concentrateon hiswork,suchas between8 and 10 o'clock
in the evening,and he spent most of thistimeon IntensiveEnglish
assignments and readingEnglishnovels."Peripheral"timeslotswere
timesbeforemeals and goingto bed when he workedon his CLT as-
signments.
In thesecondyearofhisuniversity studies,theexaminationpressure
began to mount.Minfangand his classmatesfeltthatCLT tasksgot in
the wayof preparingforthe examination.TheystartedskippingCLT
assignments and cuttingcorners.The teacherreprimanded themand,as
a penalty,gavethemmoreassignments. For 3 monthsbeforetheexami-
nation,theyhad to finishtheirhomeworkin thebathroomsbecause the

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lightsin theirdormitories
wentoutat 11 o'clockin theevening.Minfang
wrotein his diary,"Huddlingin thestinking place,we cursedCLT and
called it Cruel LanguageTeachingbecause it intensified
our pain and
sufferings."

In-Class and Out-of-Class

Learning:IntensiveEnglish VersusCLT
Minfangalso made a clear distinctionbetweenlearninginsideand
outsidetheclassroom.Accordingto him,EFL learningduringclasstime
shouldfocuson understanding the buildingblocksof a sentenceand
how theyare configuredto sound logicaland meaningful. This under-
standinglaid the foundation for a student's outside the
self-learning
classroom.He also believedstronglythathe could developcommunica-
tivecompetencethroughdailyinteraction withhis friends.He feltthat
too muchvaluableclass timewas spenton the CLT textbookand that
studentscould have learned more using other resourcesoutside the
classroom.He wrote,
AlthoughI did not understand the term'communicative competence'
and what it implied at the time, / knewthatonlyhard workand serious
learning and theso-calledinterpersonal
mattered, [communication] skills
weredevelopedfrommyintegration intoa community of cultureand
practice.(Emphasisadded)
Minfangand hisclassmatesactively soughtopportunities forlearning
in thesocialspace in whichtheywerelocated.Minfangused theanalogy
of lookingforfood and feeding.He said,
IfI had thespace,I wouldbe able tolookforfood.Theykeptfeedingme,
and did notallowanyfreedomforme to choosewhatI wantedto learn
.... In fact,thoseclassmates whowereable to learnverywellwerethe
oneswhodid nottaketheCLT courseseriously; theylookedforalterna-
tivewaysoflearning.
For example,the more well-off studentsread magazinesand watched
EnglishTV programsfromHong Kong. Poorerstudents,likeMinfang,
listenedto the radio.Everyeveningat 6 o'clock,Minfangand his class-
mateswould run to the classroomto catchthe BBC newsbecause the
wirelessreceptiontherewas better.Minfangalwaysmade sure he was
fullypreparedforthelistening task.He readall theChinesenewsarticles
and listenedto the international newson the CentralPeople's Broad-
castingStationin China so thathe had an idea of the mostimportant
international newsstoriesand could thereforefollowthe newsin En-
glish.Afterthe 6 o'clock news,he and his classmateswouldstayin the
classroomand listento thesamenewsbroadcastagainat 7 o'clock.They
also pairedup witheach otherforcampuswalkseveryeveningduring
whichtheyhad conversations in Englishforabout an hour.

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 When Minfang'sEnglishimproved,he was most unhappythathis
teachersascribedhis improvement to CLT. He wrote,
The teachersalwaysboastedhow much Communicative Englishhad
helpedus improveourlinguistic competence, as wellas pragmatic
com-
petenceand affective
competence,5 butI knewthat linguistic
competence
was achievedthroughhardworkafterclassratherthan [through]the
communicative buzzin class.. . . Myexcellentacademicachievement ...
reinforcedmybeliefthatTM [Traditional Method]isno worsethanCLT.

Minfang'sEFL Teacher Identities:A Genuine Product

of CLT
Afterobtaininghisfirst degreeat Nanda,Minfangwasoffered a teach-
ingpostthere.The appointment, however, washighlycontroversial. Min-
fangdid not make the highestgrade,thoughhe had receivedan out-
standinggraduateoftheyearmedal.He did nothavea master'sdegree,
whichwas a newuniversity requirement forteaching.He was told that
therehad been heateddebate about his eligibility forthe position.He
feltthatthestigmaofa "deaf-and-dumb studentwithspecialneeds"from
a minority regionwas stillattachedto him. Manyseniorteacherstold
himthathe shouldbe gratefulforthe appointmentand that"he must
behave himself."He was also told thathe was a "genuineproductof
CLT" and therewas a strongexpectationthathe wouldbe a good CLT
teacher.Ashamedof his "disgraceful" pastand gratefulto his teachers,
he triedto liveup to theirexpectations.He wrote,
Fromthenon, I stuckthelabel 'a genuineCLT product'on myself to
concealmydisgraceful . . . and tosoundas thoughI 'fit'verywell
identity
intothecultureof thedepartment. . . . However,I stillhad an implicit
beliefthatTM workedbetter.
The "Deaf-and'DumbStudent"and theMarginal EFL Teacher
At Nanda, the CLT componentwas consideredthe core and was
taughtby the best teachers.All the otherareas,such as grammar,vo-
5 In theForewordto the Communicative
forChinese
English Learnerstextbookseries,theauthor
of the seriesproposed thatcommunicativecompetencein Englishconsistsof threecom-
ponent parts:linguisticcompetence,pragmaticcompetence,and cognitiveand affective
capacity(whichMinfangreferredto as "pragmaticcompetence"). The authorargued for
the inclusionof thiscomponenton the ground thatlanguage is best learned when it is a
medium for learning some other subject or an exchange for affectiveor humanistic
purposes.Therefore,she argued,acquiringa language and increasingand refiningone's
cognitiveand affectivecapacityare intrinsically
concurrentand contributeto each other's
development.Minfangexplained his interpretation of affective as "the abilityto
competence
showyourfeeling,be itjoy or sorrow,appreciationor criticism,praise or complaint."In
his teaching,he tried to create opportunitiesfor the studentsto express theirfeelings
because he feltthatthe emotionalaspect of studentlearningwas veryimportant.

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 cabulary,intensivereading,and listening,were consideredauxiliary.
Amongthem,listeningwas rankedleastimportant and usuallygivento
newteachers.Eventhepayofthelisteningteacherwasthelowest.In his
firstyearof teaching,Minfangwas assignedto teachlisteningskills."It
was made veryclear thatI had to improvemyEnglishproficiency, my
teachingskills,everything. That'swhyI wasgiventhe teachingoflisten-
ing.I had to practice[myskills], and whenI provedto be okay,I could
be promoted,"Minfangrecalled in his writtennarrative.Therefore,
whenhe wasteaching,he cautiously monitoredhisutterances and made
surethathe did notmakeanygrammatical mistakesso thathisstudents
wouldnot considerhim to be professionally incompetent.
Minfangfoundthatthelistening activities
in thetextbooks werestruc-
turallyoriented,and he thoughtthatin thespiritofCLT, he shouldadd
manyinteractive suchas morningreports,
activities, songdictations, and
so on. He wasalso concernedthatifhisstudentshad poor examination
results,he would not onlylose face but also his position.However,his
studentsdid not respondwellto whathe thoughtwouldbe "interesting
communicative activities."
Theydescribedhis listeninglessonsas "con-
centrationcamps,"whichrequiredthem to do listeningtasksfor 90
minuteswithno breathingspace. Eventuallytheycomplainedto his
divisionhead. Minfangreceiveda reportfromthe head of his depart-
mentwhichstatedthathe shouldadjusttheworkloadgivento students
and improveon his teachingtechniques.He recalled,"I was desperate
and I blamedit on CLT."
On gettingsuchfeedback,he decidedto revertto whathe referred to
as theTM of teaching,withplentyofexerciseson studying and reciting
texts,and listeningto and transcribing newsexcerptsand audio novels.
He said,"Mybehaviormatchedmybeliefsforthefirst timesinceI began
teaching."At the end of the year,two of the threeclasseshe taught
rankedfirstand second respectively in the examinationamong all the
classes.Althoughhe was told that the differences
first-year in scores
amongtheclasseswerestatistically notsignificant,he stillfeltveryproud
ofhimself. Thisfurther reinforcedhisbeliefin hisapproachto language
learning,whichhe describedas the "hardlearningapproach."

A Personal Struggleto ConstructEFL TeacherIdentity

Reflectingon his firstyear of teaching, Minfangwrote,

It was a personal struggleto constructmy identityas a teacher in a
well-regardedEnglishdepartmentin China .... I consciouslyand prob-
ablytacticallyburied myformeridentityas a cripplingstudent.6Myage,

6
By "crippling,"Minfangmeant the stigmaof being "deaf and dumb."

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 and family
educationalbackground,
experience, situationall cameinto
in
play my first the of an
year,blurring boundary being authoritative
teacherand a humblestudent.
He did not knowhow to deal withthe intimaterelationshipwithhis
friends,1 yearor 2 yearshisjunior,who had nowbecome his students.
Theymade funofhimand greetedhimcheekilyas Lin Laoshi(Teacher
Lin) in hisdialectand calledhimbyhisnickname,BrotherFang.Senior
teacherscriticizedhimforbeing too friendly withthe studentsand re-
mindedhim thathe was no longera studentbut a teacher.To avoid
beingcriticizedas gaoguanxi(buildingrelationships) which,in thiscon-
text,means a
playing popularity game withthe students, he triedto put
on a sternfaceevenwhenhisstudentssmiledat him,becausehe thought
thatsmilingtoo muchwouldunderminehis authority. He stoppedask-
ing his students to call him by his Englishname, Matthew. Despitehis
attempts to distance himself from hisstudents,at the end ofhis first
year
of teaching,he became knownas the popular listeningteacher.How-
ever,Minfanggot no personalsatisfaction fromthispositivereference.
He did not wantto encourageany discussionin case his "disgraceful
past"wasinadvertently revealedin thecourseofthediscussion.Nor did
he wantto be a popularteacher,because in Chineseculture,a teacher
whois popularwithstudentsis perceivedas a teacheroflittlesubstance
and one whohas nothingbutguanxi(relationships) to winthestudents'
hearts.He foundworkingin a hierarchical institution oppressivewithso
manypowerfulpeople above him. During his first2 yearsof teaching,
Minfang never once felt thathe was a member of the EnglishDepart-
ment.

oftheTM Approach
The CLT Teacherand theDemolition

In his thirdyearof teaching,Minfangwas assignedto teachthe CLT

course. Because CLT was consideredthe core course in the English
program,thisassignmentplayed a criticalrole in Minfang'sidentity
formation.For the firsttime,he feltthathe was fullyaccepted as a
memberof theNanda staff. This identification,however,did not entail
a changein hisbeliefsaboutTM and CLT. Whenhe wasusingtheCLT
textbook,he incorporatedwhathe thoughtwas good forthe students.
For example,afterteachingskimmingand scanningskillsin reading
comprehension, he woulduse thesamepiece oftextas a springboard for
teachinglinguisticstructures and vocabulary.The studentswelcomed
thisapproach.However,afteran unannouncedvisitby an internalin-
spector,his TM approachwas completely demolished.
As a qualityassurancemechanism,the university appointedsenior
professors fromdifferent departments to act as internalinspectorsand

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conductlessonobservations. Minfangwasundertheimpressionthatthe
inspectors would givehim advance noticebeforevisiting hisclass.He was
traumatized when one of themappeared at the back of his classroom
one day.He had not been feelingwell the day beforeand was ill pre-
pared.He initially plannedto askhisstudentsto do somesilentreading
in class.However,he could not possiblydo thatin the presenceof an
inspector, norcould he ask theinspectorto come backanotherday.His
mindwentblank.All he could see was the inspector,crossinghis arms,
puttingon a sternface and sizinghimup.
The class thathe was teachingwas quiet,and he had not had much
successin gettingthemto participatein class.He thoughtit wouldbe
disastrous ifhe used oralactivitiesand thestudentsdid notrespond.He
said,"Atthe time,myunderstanding was thatiftheclasswasnot active,
ifnobodyrespondedto you,how could you call it communicative lan-
guage teaching?" So he decided to adopt an avoidance strategy.He
startedwithreadingcomprehension insteadand hoped thatbythetime
he had finishedthe parton readingforgist,the inspectorwould have
gone. But when he had finishedthatpartof the lesson,the inspector
showedno sign of leaving.To avoid oral activities, he used the same
readingpassage forintensive readingcomprehension and explainedthe
linguisticstructuresand vocabulary in detail.He stumbled and sweated.
Attheend of thelesson,theinspectorgavehima piece ofpaperfullof
commentsand said sternly, 'Young man,CLT shouldnotbe taughtlike
this.You havetoworkhardon this.Don't ruinthereputation oftheCLT
course."Minfangwas horrified. He read the inspector'scommentsbut
he could not understanda word.
Aftertheroundofinspections wascompleted,thehead ofthedepart-
mentsaid at a departmental meetingthatifteachersdid not teachCLT
properlywhen theywereinspected,the reputationof the department
would be ruined.He cited an example of how CLT was taught,and
Minfangknewthathe wastalkingabouthislesson.He could notlookthe
head of thedepartment in theeyeand he wasconvincedthathe would
be fired.Afterthistraumaticexperience,Minfangdecided to stickto
CLT and followthe textbookdoggedly.He was afraidthatan inspector
mightshowup at anytime.The burdenofruiningthereputation ofCLT
and bringingshameto the department was too greatforhim to shoul-
der. Yet, in his heartof hearts,Minfangbelievedthatsomethingwas
missing.He recalledhis learningexperienceas a studentand howfrus-
tratedhe was when the teacherdid not make explicitthe linguistic
objectivesof theactivities and he wasleftgropingin thedark.He knew
thathis studentswouldfeelthe same way.
Minfangwas caughtbetweenhis allegianceto his institution and his
moralresponsibility to his students,bothbeingpartofwhatit meantto

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himto be a teacherat Nanda. He feltthathe waspulledone wayor the
otherdependingon wherethepressurecamefrom.Aftertheinspections
werefinished, he feltthathe had morespace to exploremethodologies
suitedto the needs and wishesof his students.When his divisionhead
monitoredhis teachingand pointedout thathe focusedtoo much on
linguisticstructures,he would lean more towardthe communicative
activities.

The "ModelCLT Teacher"and theCustodianofCUT

In his fourthyearof teaching,Minfangwas selectedas the "model

teacherof CLT" because of his high studentevaluationscores. Col-
leaguesfromhisdepartment as wellas fromotherdepartments thronged
to observehisteachingwithor withoutadvancenotice.To liveup to this
award,he abandonedhis eclecticapproachand stuckfirmly to CLT. In
thesame year,Minfangwas giventhe responsibility fornewstaff induc-
tion.As partoftheinduction,he talkedabout thesuccessofhis depart-
mentin CLT teaching.He pointedout theimportanceofusingtheCLT
textbookseries,highlighting thatit was developedwiththe help of the
BritishCounciland a numberof big namesin the fieldof Englishlan-
guage teaching,and thatit had won numerousawards.This enhanced
his identificationas a memberof the department. He drewan analogy
betweenhis role and the role of the eldestson of a traditional Chinese
family who explained the family'straditionsand secret skillsthatwere
passed on from to
generation generation,7 and how all members of the
family had to striveto the
preserve reputation, the tradition,and the
skillsofthefamily. In hisfifthyear,he became thedeputy directorof the
Teaching ResearchOffice(jiaoyanzhi)and was made the directorthe
following year.He wasalso appointedthecourseleaderofCLT and the
coordinatorof a project.
Engagementof thisnaturewas a source of identification withthe
institutionforMinfang.He investedhis selfin buildingup the institu-
tion'sreputationand inductingnewteachersintothepedagogicalprac-
ticesthattheinstitution advocated.He also investedin hisrelationswith
colleagues such that he sawhimself and wasseen as thecustodianofCLT
pedagogy. He said,
evenifI didnotbelieveinwhatI wasdoing,
foran office;
I wasresponsible
I couldnotsayso. I wasrepresenting . . . [WhatI said]would
theOffice.
influencemyaudience,whichcould be ... a hundredpeople if I was

7
Accordingto the Chinese martialart legends,each familyhad developed a set of expert
skillswhichwould not be revealed to outsiders.

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 to thepublic.Yourownbeliefsaresomething
talking personal,so isyour
psychological You haveto behaveresponsibly.
struggle. Therefore, I was
verycautiousaboutwhat I said.
He also feltthatit would not have been possibleforhim to provide
leadershipifhe did not embraceCLT as the official methodology.
His identificationwiththeinstitution, whichwas bothreificativeand
did
participative, not entaila in
change beliefs, however. Because of his
officialpositions,Minfangbecame verycautiousabout disclosinghis
viewsaboutCLT. He wasworriedthathe mightbe consideredan outlaw
bythe authorities. He spelledout the followingcriteriawhendeciding
on how frankhe could be withhis colleagues:social distance,profes-
sionalrelationship, formality ofcontext,age, and experience.He would
notdisclosehisviewsto hisformerteacheror to teacherswhowereolder
or moreexperiencedthanhe was.Nor wouldhe discusshisviewsifthe
conversation waslessthaninformal, forexample,a sit-down conversation
in whichhisviewsweresolicited.However,ifthe teacherwas of his age
or younger,lessexperienced,and he knewthathe/shewassimplyvent-
ing his/herfrustrations and thathis wordswould not get back to the
powers thatbe, he would empathizeand disclosethathe wasnotentirely
in agreementwithsome of the pedagogicalsuggestions in CLT.

PracticalKnowledge
Theorizing and Reclaiming
Meaningsof
EFL Teaching

As soon as Minfangsettledintohis teachingjob afterthefirst3 years,

he enrolledin a master'sdegreeprogramin EFL teachingat Nanda to
obtainthemissingqualification forhisappointment and completeditin
his fourthyearof teaching.The exposureto theoriesand models of
Englishlanguageteachingprovideda different perspectiveon the con-
flictsthathe had experiencedduringhis4 yearsof teaching.In particu-
lar,he founddiscussionsof the misconceptions of CLT veryuseful.He
realizedthataccuracyand fluencyshouldnot be seen as dichotomous,
and thatone was not supposed to be achievedat the expense of the
other.Similarly, student-centerednesswas not to be understoodas the
absenceof teacherguidance.
He was relievedto see thathe could actuallydefendsome of his
pedagogiesthatwerebased on his own learningexperiencerootedin
Confucianlearningculture.He also feltthathe wasable to see intuitive
classroompracticesin a theoretically principledway.For example,an
understanding of the principlesbehind information gap activitiesen-
abled himto understandhowinappropriate modificationsof theactivi-
tiesmightdestroytheircommunicative purpose.An understanding of
the difference betweenintensiveand extensivereadingenabled himto

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 use readingtextsappropriately. He providedroom forstudentsto ex-
plore the linguisticstructures forthemselves withoutrelinquishing his
responsibilityas a teacherto provideexplicitexplanationsofthesestruc-
turesafterthestudentshad completedthe task.He felt"morecomfort-
able" about the eclecticapproachthathe had adopted.
The theoretical inputfromthemaster'sprogramenabledMinfangto
theorizehispersonalpracticalknowledge, whichempoweredhimto re-
claimthemeaningsof EFL teaching.However,it did not empowerhim
to do thatin public.He said,"I wasonlya teacherwitha Master'sdegree.
How could I assertmyviewsin themidstofall theprofessors and teach-
erswithPhDs?"Withcoercionbeingthedominantmode of alignment,
Minfangtaughtaccordingto whathe felt"comfortable with"and what
students responded wellto onlyifhe feltno external
pressureto conform.
He narratedan episode in his sixthyearof teachingthatepitomized
theconflicthe had experienced.He wasput in chargeofpreparingfor
theMinistry ofEducation'squalityassuranceinspectionofCLT and was
appointedbythe university to conducta demonstration lessonto illus-
tratethe principlesof CLT. The pressureon him was enormous.He
startedto preparethemostdetailedlessonhe had everplannedaccord-
ingto theofficially sanctionedmethodology. The lessonwasrecordedin
a studioand televisedlivein the department.
The demonstration lesson,in Minfang'seyes,was a disaster.The stu-
dents,highlyexcitedunderthe spotlight, wereover-responsive. He de-
scribedthelessonas "unreal"and theexperienceas "traumatic." He was
disgustedbyhis"dualidentity as a fakedCLT practitioner and a realself
[that] believed in eclecticism."He feltthatCLT had been elevatedas "a
religion" in his institutionrather than an to
approach learning.
At the end of his sixthyearof teaching,he took leave to pursuea
doctoraldegree in the United Kingdom.Reflectingon his emotional
journey,Minfangwrote,

werenotresolveduntilafterI lefttheinstitution.
The conflicts Nowthat
I am pursuingmydoctoraldegreein the U.K., and withtwoyearsof
researchstudy[behindme], I feelthatI am moresolidand I knowwhat
I am doing.

He beganto questionwhethertherewassucha thingas themostsuitable

methodology, be it CLT, task-based
learning,or some othermethodol-
ogy.He feltthattheteacher'slivedexperiencein theclassroomwasthe
bestguide forpedagogicaldecision-making.He remarked,"Myunder-
standingnowis thatno matterwhatmethodology youuse,youhavetobe
humanistic.The essenceofCLT is humanism.I do believeteachingis an
skilldevelopedthroughexperience,inspiration
integrated and passion."

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DISCUSSION

Minfang'sstoriesshowthatidentities are constituted byidentification

and negotiationof meanings,as Wenger(1998) pointsout. Identifica-
tionis bothreificative
and participative.
Reificationinvolvesinclusionas
well as exclusionfrommembershipin variouscommunities. Member-
shipis inseparablefromcompetence.Centralto theprocessof identifi-
cation is participationas well as nonparticipation. As Freeman and
Johnson(1998) pointout,participation in the social practicesand the
socioculturalenvironments associatedwithteachingand learningis es-
sentialtolearninghowto teach.Participation is contingenton legitimacy
of access to practice.Negotiationof meaningsinvolvesbeing able to
shape and hence claimownershipof meaningsthatmatterin the com-
munity.In otherwords,participation as wellas nonparticipation in the
negotiationof meaningsis centralto identity formation.

Membership,Competence,and Legitimacyof Access

to Practice

Membership in a community consistsofnotjust thereifiedmarkers of

membership butmoreimportant, thecompetencethatmembership en-
tails.As Wenger(1998) notes,the recognitionof one's competenceas
valuedbythe community is an important sourceof identity formation.
Thiscompetenceencompassesknowinghowto engagewithothermem-
bers,understanding theenterprise in whichmembersare engaged,and
the
sharing mediating resources. When Minfangfirstjoined Nanda, al-
thoughhis membershipas a studentof Nanda was reifiedthroughfor-
mal admissionprocedures,he wasnotfullyacceptedas a memberofthe
learnercommunity by his peers. Instead,the othering (Said, 1978) of
Minfangthroughreifications such as a "deaf-and-dumb studentwitha
specialneed" and "Brother Fang" indicated hismarginalityin thelearner
The
community. marginality ofmembership wasthe resultofan unequal
powerrelationship, whichwas socioeconomicas well as symbolic.Be-
cause of theasymmetrical relationshipbetweentheeconomicpowersof
the innerand coastalregionsin China (Hu, 2005), Minfang'sprevious
learningexperiences,despitehis outstanding achievements in English,
wererenderedirrelevant; so washismothertongue,a dialectofan inner
region.The marginalization had a profoundeffect on Minfang'ssenseof
self-worth and identity,which,as we have seen,keptsurfacing through-
out his teachingcareer.
To be fullyrecognizedas a memberof the community, he acquired
thecompetencethatdefinedthislearnercommunity throughengaging

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 in thesocialdiscourseand activities, and aligninghimself withthenorms
and expectationsof its members.This included,among otherthings,
beingable to speakstandardCantonese,to code-mix,to use Cantonese
slang,and mostimportant ofall,beingproficient in English,particularly
in spokenEnglish.Minfang'soutstandingachievementin English,the
core competency on whichthereputationofhisdepartment rested,was
crucialto his recognitionas a memberof the learnercommunity.
Similarly,the recognitionof Minfang'scompetencein EFL teaching
wasa majorsourceofidentity formation. In hisfirst2 yearsof teaching,
Minfang'sidentityof marginality in the EFL teachingcommunity was
largelyshaped by the factthatthe teachingcommunity did not fully
recognizehis EFL teachingcompetence,as evidencedby his being as-
signedto teachlisteningskills,whichwereleastvalued,beingreminded
ofhis"disgraceful history" as a "deaf-and-dumb student," and beingtold
thathe was recruitedas an exceptionto theruleand thathe shouldbe
"grateful" fortheappointment. It wasnotuntilhe wasgiventherespon-
sibilityto teach CLT, whichwas a recognitionthathe possessedcore
competence,thathe began to identify himself,and feltthathe was
identified byothers,as a fullmemberof the department.
Closelylinkedwiththeconceptofcompetenceas a sourceofidentity
formationis the concept of legitimateaccess to practice.Lave and
Wenger(1991) proposetheconceptof legitimate peripheral as
participation
an importantformof learningin whichlearnersare givenaccess to
practicewithoutassumingfullresponsibility. Wenger(1998) further dis-
tinguishesbetweenperipherality and marginality accordingto the tra-
jectoryof participation: Peripherality leads to fullparticipationwhereas
marginality does not. Minfang'sstoriesshowthatapartfromthe trajec-
toryof participation, legitimacy ofaccessto practicewas criticalin reshap-
ing his identity as an EFL teacher.It encompassesnotjust beinggiven
legitimate accessto participation butalso legitimatingaccesstopractice.
For
example,in his thirdyearof teaching,even thoughMinfangwas given
legitimate accessto Nanda's core practice,thatis, the teachingof CLT,
he triedto legitimate thisaccessas wellas hisreification as a CLT teacher
because of his identity as a formerstudentin Nanda who did not make
it to the top of his class.He triedto demonstrate thathe possessedthe
necessaryprofessionalcompetenceby aligninghis practicewiththat
sanctionedbytheinstitution despitehisreservations aboutit,and byob-
taininga master'sdegreein TEFL, whichwastherequiredqualification.
Minfang'slived experience shows that there are two important
sourcesof identity formation: The individualrecognizesthathe or she
possessescompetencethathis or her community values,and the indi-
vidualis givenlegitimacy of access to practice.These twosourcesare
dialectically related.Recognitionofcompetencevaluedbya community
and legitimacy of access to practiceare mutuallyconstitutive.

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Appropriatingand ReclaimingOwnershipof Meaningsof
EFL Learning

in theconstruction
The abilityto participate and negotiationofmean-
ings,and to claim ownershipof meaningsis anothercrucialaspectof
identityformation.Minfang'sidentityas an EFL learnerwas deeply
rootedin hislivedexperienceoflearningat a timewhenresourceswere
scarceand educationwas highlycompetitive. He had to grabeverypos-
sibleopportunity forlearning.The learningstrategies thathe developed
and hisallocationof timeand place fordifferent typesoflearningtasks
wereall partof the educationlandscape,whichis inseparablefromthe
socioeconomiclandscapeat the time.
The identity conflictsthatMinfangexperiencedas a learnercould be
attributed to the factthatthe studentsand the teachers,or rather,the
authorities at Nanda, definedthe meaningsof the learners'enterprise
differently.For Minfang,developinga highlevelof Englishproficiency
meantgaininga good understanding of the Englishlanguagesystem
throughtheintensive studyoflanguagestructures, texts,and vocabulary.
Accordingto him,thelearnershouldachievethisunderstanding under
the teacher'sguidance,whichhe believedwas the mostefficient and
effective use of class time.The developmentof communicationskills
shouldtakeplace outsideof classtimeand could be managedperfectly
wellbythestudentson theirown.MinfangdefinedthemeaningofEFL
learningas "hard workand seriouslearning,"and he and his peers
definedthe meaningof CLT as "funactivities," whichincluded oral
participation, movingaround in the classroom,and shoutingat each
other.However,theirCLT teachersappropriatedtheirexperiencesof
learningEFL outsidethe classroomas theexperiencesof learningCLT
in the classroom.This renderedMinfang'slearningexperiencesand
learningstrategies The reification
irrelevant. ofMinfangas a CLTproduct
by his teacherswas an appropriationof Minfang'smeaningsof EFL
learning.As Wenger(1998) observes,appropriationof meaningsoften
leads to the alienationof the originalproducersof thosemeanings.In
Minfang'sstories,the alienationtook the formof his, as well as his
peers',nonparticipation in the CLT approachto learning.
Similarly,Minfang'sparticipation in the act of teachingshaped his
understanding thatan EFL teacherdoes more thansimplyadopt offi-
ciallysanctionedpedagogicalapproaches.He was constantly coerced,
however,to relinquishthisownershipand to alignwiththe meanings
definedbythe institution. Evenwhenhe was givenlegitimateaccess to
CLT, he playeda minimalrole in the negotiationof itsmeanings.The
institution'sappropriationof Minfang'smeaningsof EFL teaching
throughreifying him as a modelCLT teacher led him to resistthe CLT

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approach.Minfangresistedalignmentbycoercionand reclaimedown-
ershipofmeaningsbyintegrating TM intoCLT whenhe wasnotunder
externalpressureand beingcautiousaboutdecidingto disclosehisviews
versionof CLT.
on the institution's

Power and Economies of Meaning

The complexinterplay ofappropriating and reclaimingownershipof

meaningsbetweenMinfangand his teacherscould be explained by
Wenger's(1998) conceptofpowerand economiesofmeaning.CLT has
highercurrency thanotherELT methodsin China because thegovern-
menthas recognizedit as the mostvalued approach to EFL learning.
More important, such recognition, shaped byWestern-dominated ELT
discourse,has been supportedbyauthoritative voicesin thefieldofELT.
Minfang'sresistanceto appropriationtook the formof otheringCLT.
Insteadof trying to understandthe theoreticalassumptionsunderpin-
ningCLT, Minfangreifiedhis ownapproachas theTM, and he reified
CLT as cruellanguageteaching.Hence, Minfang'sidentity as a CLTproduct
nevertookrootalthoughhe had won prizesin English.Neitherdid his
identity despitehisleadershippositionsin ELT. In fact,
as a CLT teacher
themoreresponsibilities he wasgiven,the morehe wasunderpressure
to alignwiththe goals of the institutionand the less ownershiphe had
of the meaningsofwhathe was doing.
Studying fora master'sdegreeprovidedMinfangthe opportunity to
understandthe theoreticalunderpinnings of CLT and enabled him to
theorizehis personalpracticalknowledge.This blurredthe imagined
boundariesthathe had previousdrawnbetweenhis own pedagogical
approaches,reifiedas TM and CLT, and broke down the imagined
dichotomy. By imaginedboundaries I mean boundariesthatare brought
intobeingthroughimagination as a mode ofbelonging(Wenger,1998).
Onlywhen the imaginedboundarieswere brokendown did Minfang
begin to gain confidencein his own pedagogicalstrategiesand feel
empoweredto adopt an eclecticapproach.At the same time,he began
to see theinadequaciesofsomeofhispedagogicalstrategies and started
to modifythem.The sourcesof Minfang'sempowerment werethe pos-
sessionof knowledgeand a master'sdegree,bothofwhichwerevalued
bythe EFL community. However,such empowerment, as we haveseen,
wasnotsufficient forMinfangto negotiatethemeaningsofEFL teaching
and learningwiththe powersthatbe. In an institution witha clearly
delineatedhierarchyof power,the asymmetrical power relationship,
whichled to the nonnegotiability of the meaningsof CLT, was a major
reasonwhyMinfang'sidentity as a CLT teachernevertookroot.

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CONCLUSION: IDENTITY FORMATION
AS PARTICIPATION
The narrative inquiryofMinfang'sexperiencesas an EFL learnerand
teacher shows that teacher's identityformationis highlycomplex.
Wenger's(1998) socialtheoryofidentity formation provideda powerful
framework formakingsenseof theprocessesinvolved.Minfang'sstories
showthatidentity is relationalas wellas experiential, reificative
as wellas
and
participative, individual as well as social. The lived experiencesof
oneself
reifying and having oneself reified as a member of a community
constitute
an important aspect of identification. The legitimate accessto
practiceand the so
competence developed constitute another crucial
dimensionof identity formation. This studyfurther showsthatidentifi-
cationinvolvesnotjust beinggivenlegitimate accessto practicebutalso
one's
legitimating access to practice as well as legitimating reifications,
no matterwhetherthesereifications are givenbyoneselfor others.Both
processescould be capturedunder the broader concept legitimacy of
access to practice.
The processofidentification interactswiththeparticipation in nego-
that in
tiatingmeanings, is,participation negotiating meanings shar-
and
ing the of
ownership meanings.Participation as well as nonparticipation
in negotiating meaningsis shaped bypowerrelationships amongmem-
bers of a community. Being able to participatein the constructionof
meanings that matter in a is as as
communityjust important beinggiven
legitimate accessto practicethroughreification. In otherwords,partici-
pation is central to identity formation.
The interplayof identification and the negotiability of meanings
couldgenerateidentity conflicts. couldlead to newforms
These conflicts
of engagementin practice,newrelationswithmembersof the commu-
nity,and newownershipofmeanings.Or theycould lead to identities of
marginality, and as
disengagement, nonparticipation, Minfang's stories
showed.Teacher educatorsand teachermentorsmustunderstandthat
the processesof identify formation are complexand thatparticipation
plays a central role in those processesso thatteachers,especiallynew
teachers, are afforded legitimacy ofaccessto practiceand opportunities
fordevelopingprofessionalcompetenceand havingtheircompetence
recognized.Equallyimportant,theymustalso understandthatlegiti-
macyof access to participationis oftenshaped by powerrelationsin
communities' social structures, whichare inseparablefromthebroader
sociopolitical contexts (see also Freeman& Johnson,1998).

ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
reviewers
The authorthanksthetwoanonymous on the
fortheirusefulcomments
manuscript.

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THE AUTHOR

AmyB. M. Tsui is chair professorof language and education at the University of

Hong Kong, Hong Kong SAR, China. She has publishedin a range of areas, includ-
ing teacher education,classroomdiscourse,and language policy.Her most recent
book, co-editedwithJamesTollefson,is LanguagePolicy,Cultureand Identity
in Asian
Contexts.

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