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Amaya

Durnin - 20141733

Feedback for Humanities and Social Sciences: Year 4



Student name: Alex

Objective Excellent Proficient Satisfactory Unsatisfactory Comments:
Brainstorm Shows explicit Shows some Shows limited Shows no Student has
ideas about knowledge, knowledge, knowledge, evidence and researched
what a convict evidence and evidence and evidence and knowledge of events, but they
who travelled to research of research of research of the the events that have chosen
Australia on the events and events and events of the occurred during events that are
First Fleet would experiences that experiences first settlers. the first settlers not as major as
do in their the first settlers during the First arrival at others.
everyday life went through in Settlers arrival. Sydney Cove.
upon arrival to their life upon
Sydney Cove. arrival.
Compose a Demonstrates Shows some Shows little Shows no Student has
sequenced diary understanding understanding understanding understanding mentioned life
entry based on of the of the of the of the of the past, but
the events of a differences differences differences differences has not
first settler in between life between life between life between life explicitly
the first six now and life of now and life of now and life of now and life of explained what
months of their the past. the past. the past. the past. it was exactly
time at Sydney Student has Student has Student has Student has like in order to
Cove. developed a demonstrated a developed a developed a show the
sequenced diary somewhat slightly diary entry with differences
entry using sequenced diary sequenced diary no historical from now and
historical terms. entry with entry with no terms or then.
limited historical terms. sequence of
historical terms. events.
Demonstrates Demonstrates Demonstrates Demonstrates Does not Student has
an and expresses and expresses an opinion of demonstrate an given opinion of
understanding opinion of some opinion of some events opinion or what happened
and opinion of attitudes and attitudes and through emotions of in the past, but
the events that feelings through feelings through characters and events through only in one
occurred in the the characters the characters context but characters and event. They
first six months and context and context does not show context. have shown it
of the convicts about particular about some emotions through a
life. events that events that through feelings character.
occurred. occurred. of the Although they
characters. do not show
emotion in the
story.

Commentary:

Alex, you have done some great work on your diary entry. You have constructed a diary entry that is
contains three events from the past, highlights your characters lifestyle and some research. Although, I
think with a bit more research you would be able to create a diary entry that contains events that show
more understanding and knowledge of the life of a first settler. But, I do like the way you have related to
your settler, their family and what they have to do in order to survive the first six months of settlement.

Overall, I think with more development in your sequential writing skills, spelling, your understanding of
events and the difference between the past and present, you will be able to improve your Humanities and
Social Sciences skills.

I look forward to seeing your growth in Humanities and Social Sciences in the near future!

Best wishes,

Miss Durnin