Learning Journal #6

Step Two: In this week, the class learned how to construct a narrative-like
script that consists of various observations and our own thoughts of them. As
with any major essay or work, an outline was set up in order to easily
organize our thoughts and describe our experience in a fluid manner.
Through this, I was able to be selective on the observations Ive made in the
event I attended and provide my own descriptive input on the data I
collected. On a much deeper scale, however, I began to understand the
scope of what occurs and what can occur in my surroundings and see the
tiny details that I as an individual overlook on a daily. In respect to revision
of written works, I learned one must be open to criticism, both negative and
positive, and be able to withstand the truth of ones writing ability to further
improve in the future.
Step 3: The two articles that I read this week, Brock Dethiers Revising
Attitudes and Donald Murrays The Makers Eye, revolved around two core
aspects of revision and writhing. These aspects were attitude and structure,
respectively. As previously stated by both Dethier and I, being open to
criticism and accepting of such feedback allows for individuals to better
utilize suggestions and consequently improve upon their work. But at the
same time, one must be selective on the feedback he/she wishes to use or
sees as beneficial so as to further improve their writing capabilities. As for
The Makers Eye, the author defines writing as a never ending process and
one in which the participant must be wary of their own attachment to what
they write. One of the core elements Dethier talks is the fact that a decent
piece of writing is based on a sturdy framework of logic, argument, narrative,
or motivation.
Step 4 and Step 5: For the revision of my living narrative, I will better
describe how the events that took place during my baseball career improved
my literacy in the realm of baseball and influenced my persona. I will also
have my roommates revise my narrative to further provide input on my
writing. To better provide unity and fluidity to my narrative, I will implement
more effective transitions to change the focus of my paragraphs more fluidly
as well as better tie in my thoughts with more descriptive terminology. Of
course, I will also implement related pictures and captions to bring my
personal journey to a visually appealing status. To finalize my revisions, I will
visit the Student Academic Success Center to gain even more feedback on
how to improve my narrative. The approach I will use to revise my narrative
on my own will be the descriptive outline in Dethiers article.