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Here's a brief explanation of the three main parts found in the TOEFL essay structure:
Introduction
The introduction is the first paragraph of your essay. The first few sentences of this
paragraph simply introduce the reader to the topic. The last sentence is called the
thesis statement and clearly states your opinion. This is the most important sentence
in the essay.
Body
The body of the essay is usually three paragraphs long. Each paragraph begins with a
topic sentence that tells the reader what the rest of the paragraph is going to be about.
The remaining sentences are called supporting ideas because their main function is to
"support" the topic sentence.
Conclusion
The conclusion is the last paragraph of the essay. It restates the thesis and gives the
reader a brief summary of the essay's main points. This paragraph is usually about 3
sentences long.
The introduction has a "hook or grabber" to catch the reader's attention. Some
"grabbers" include:
1. Opening with an unusual detail: (Manitoba, because of its cold climate, is not
thought of as a great place to be a reptile. Actually, it has the largest seasonal
congregation of garter snakes in the world!)
2. Opening with a strong statement: (Cigarettes are the number one cause of lighter
sales in Canada!)
3. Opening with a Quotation: (Elbert Hubbard once said, "Truth is stronger than
fiction.")
4. Opening with an Anecdote: An anecdote can provide an amusing and attentiongetting opening if it is short and to the point.
5. Opening with a Statistic or Fact: Sometimes a statistic or fact will add emphasis
or interest to your topic. It may be wise to include the item's authoritative source.
6. Opening with a Question. (Have you ever considered how many books we'd read if
it were not for television?)
7. Opening with an Exaggeration or Outrageous Statement. (The whole world
watched as the comet flew overhead.)
Before we look at examples of unacceptable thesis statements, let's have another look
at our sample essay question:
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
Police officers should not carry guns.
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
Now take a look at an unacceptable thesis statement:
Police officers work hard.
This thesis statement doesn't give us an opinion. It also doesn't tell us what the essay
is about. In fact, it's not related to the essay topic at all. Here's another one that's not
so good:
Guns help to protect police officers.
Unacceptable. It may be true that "guns help to protect police officers," but we still don't
know what the writer's opinion is. And here's a third example:
Police officers don't need guns.
Again, it may be true that "police officers don't need guns," but what is the writer's
opinion? Should police officers carry guns?
Strong thesis statements
Now that we've seen a few examples of both good thesis statements and bad thesis
statements, the next question is this: how can we write a great thesis statement? Let's
start with a thesis statement that we already know is good:
Police officers should not carry guns.
This is a good thesis statement, but it's not a great one. We can improve it by making the
language stronger. Do this by using stronger language, words such as no or never.
Here's what it looks like when we've made our improvements:
Police officers should never carry guns.
We could also say something like this:
No police officer should ever carry a gun.
If our thesis statement is a positive sentence, we can strengthen the language with a
word like always. Here's an example:
Police officers should always carry guns.
Next we'll look at other ways of strengthening our thesis
statement.
Very strong thesis statements
Okay, we have written our thesis statement. Here it is:
Police officers should never carry guns.
Compiled and organized by LVARO DEL CASTILLO and
JOSEFINA MILLN
RECOMENDATIONS
Dont be afraid of controversy.
In an argumentative essay, a thesis is a declarative sentence that takes a stance. If you
feel strongly about a social issue and you believe you can back it up, then go ahead and
do it. Just be sure you back up your stance with facts and not opinions. Dont use cruel
or insulting statements, just the facts.
Be aware that there will always be someone who disagrees with your stance. Thats
what makes life interesting. Thats also what makes essays interesting!
Dont be ambiguous.
You may decide to take a stance, but you cant find facts to back up your argument. If so,
you might be on the right track, but you just need to focus a little more.
For instance, you might want to argue that music classes should be mandatory for all
students. You may believe this, but can you back it up?
First, do a little research. You may find evidence that children who study music at a very
young age tend to do well in math and science later in life. Based on this research, you
may want to narrow your thesis to reflect this more narrow argument.
Example Introduction:
"Do you think teenagers should have jobs while they are still students?":
I've worked ever since I was twelve. As a teenager, I cleaned houses for my
family members, made banana splits at an ice cream parlor, and waited tables at various
restaurants. I did it all while carrying a pretty good grade point average in school, too! I
definitely believe that teenagers should have jobs while they are still students because a
job teaches discipline, earns them cash for school, and keeps them out of trouble.
Example Introduction:
Many find it advantageous to purchase a home, but others find renting more
suited to their needs. While there are advantages for both options, renting is generally
the best choice for young foreign students. Foreign students often do not have good
credit histories or enough money to buy a home and need to know that it will not be
necessary to find a buyer for the home if they decide to transfer to another school or
return home.
Example Introduction:
[GRABBER-OPENING WITH A STRONG STATEMENT] Of all the problems facing the
environment today, the one that bothers me the most is global warming. [FOCUSING]
Some scientists say that the earth is getting warmer because of the greenhouse effect.
Example Introduction:
MUST
Its goal is to support thesis statement.
Paragraphs in the Body
Each paragraph of the body supports the thesis statement. And each paragraph has
the same structure--1 topic sentence followed by 3 to 5 supporting ideas. Like this:
A personal experience
A logical argument
Statistical evidence
Factual information
Expert opinion
We can use any of these four supporting ideas. However, most students use a
personal experience or something they have read about. This is probably because it is
easier to write about these things.
Writing supporting ideas
Before we begin, let's have another look at our first topic sentence. Here's what we
have so far:
First of all, guns cause more harm than good.
Now let's use something that we've heard or read about for our supporting ideas. Our
paragraph might look something like this:
First of all, guns cause more harm than good. There are often stories in
the newspaper about people who are accidentally shot. Moreover, many of
these stories involve police officers. If guns had not been involved, these
accidents would not have happened. On the other hand, there are very few
stories about how a gun has saved somebody's life.
In this example, our supporting ideas come from stories we've read in the newspaper.
And they all explain why guns cause more harm than good.
I. Introduction:
A. Get the readers attention by using a "hook."
B. Give some background information if necessary.
C. Thesis or focus statement.
II. First argument or reason to support your position:
A. Topic sentence explaining your point.
Elaboration to back your point.
III. Second argument or reason to support your position:
A. Topic sentence explaining your point.
Elaboration to back your point.
IV. Third argument or reason to support your position:
A. Topic sentence explaining your point.
Elaboration to back your point.
V. Opposing Viewpoint: (This is optional, however highly recommended, so that the reader will know you
have considered another point of view and have a rebuttal to it.)
A.
B.
C.
VI. Conclusion:
A.
B.
C.
APPENDIX
Moreover
here is some more information; in addition; also
Television is a complete waste of time. Moreover, there is never anything good to watch.
Nevertheless
but; however; in spite of that
Sometimes my boyfriend makes me crazy. Nevertheless, I still love him.
For example, here is one example of what I mean
A dog is a wonderful pet. For example, it always comes when you call its name.
For instance
here is one example of what I mean
The internet is one of the greatest achievements in history. For instance, people can
now learn about almost anything online--it has more information than most libraries!
For one thing
this is my first example; one example is this
I hate my car! For one thing, it never starts in the morning.
In fact
here is some more specific information
Americans are fat people! In fact, statistics show that 4 out of 5 Americans are
overweight.
In point of fact
but here is some surprising information
Some people argue that guns are responsible for violence in our society. In point of fact,
most violent crimes do not involve guns.
Similarly
in the same or similar way
Both of my parents were teachers. Similarly, I am also a teacher.
In other words
what I mean to say is this
All politicians lie, cheat, and steal. In other words, the only people they really care about
are themselves.
All in all
in general; overall
My town has a library, a swimming pool, and a few good places to eat. All in all, it's a
nice place to live.
In short
here is a summary in very simple language
Pollution causes global warming, destroys the environment, and endangers human life.
In short, there is nothing good about pollution.
Grammar note: don't forget the comma!
Transitional phrases are usually used at the beginning of a sentence. They are
always followed by a comma. Examples:
In contrast, humans can speak and communicate.
For example, it always comes when you call its name.
Moreover, there is never anything good to watch.
Never forget your comma! This is a very, very important part of writing your TOEFL
essay.
PASSIVE:
The active voice is much stronger than the passive voice. Use the active voice as much as
possible.
10. Use transitional words and phrases
Transitional words and phrases make your writing easier to understand. They connect
ideas and present them to the reader in a logical order. Here are some examples: First of
all..., In addition..., More importantly..., In closing..., In conclusion....