THE INTERDENOMINATIONAL THEOLGICAL CENTER

WHO YOU BE: A PASTORAL THEOLOGICAL REFLECTION PAPER ON

MENTORING AND COUNSELING AFRICAN AMERICAN MALES

SUBMITTED TO DR. WILLIE F. GOODMAN, JR.

IN PARTIAL COMPLETION OF THE REQUIREMENTS
FOR PSC 715B: PASTORAL COUNSELING WITH AFRICAN AMERICAN MEN

BY
ANTHONY D. CLINKSCALES

ATLANTA, GA
JULY 31, 2009

Good-Enough Mentoring, a model of black pastoral counseling for the black male
pastoral counselor working with African American men, provides a systemic and systematic
approach to counseling. This paradigm can be beneficial to African American men who are selfdestructive, self-loathing, and need to learn to be self-soothing. In this paper I will reflect upon
the relevance of the pastoral theological reflections discussed in Dr. Willie Goodmans (hereafter
referred to as Dr. G-dman) class concerning his Good-Enough mentoring model. Pastoral
theological reflections include the following: the Self Psychology of Heinz Kohut, the Black
Liberation Theology of James Cone, the Black psychology re-education model of Naim Akbar,
and the cultural criticism of Cornel West. I will discuss these topics as they help me to better
understand myself, and facilitate future pastoral counseling of an African American male.
When I think about all the problems that persist in the world, I know that the work of a
counselor is never done. Dr. G-dmans lectures have helped me to understand many
fundamental realities: In forming a collaborative mentoring relationship, one has to have the
ability to immerse oneself into the life of another person. This is the definition of empathy and
the starting point for successful dialogue with a counselee. Essentially, we need to know that
although we may have some pathologies, we are not pathological. Nonetheless, we have to be
intentional about not pathologizing us or others who look like us. There needs to be sober
conversations about how we respect ourselves and relate with other people. The best thing
about being a counselor is that the discipline allows one to make use of oneself in helping
others, while simultaneously being helped personally. In pastoral counseling, one is blessed as
one is being a blessing to others.
During one of our class sessions, I asked Dr. G-dman about the relevancy of pastoral
counseling with African American men ages 18-22 who lack work ethic, direction, and familial
support. Dr. G-dman affirmed that the main thing such persons need is fathering. There needs
to be a father-figure in their lives. It is important that the young men have some attachment with
a father-figure so that they can learn to be confident, productive, and accountable. People often

adopt substitutes as compensation for being deprived of natural sources as a result of poor
family structure. Persons need to be affirmed and taught how to persevere. Relatedness is
essential for the development of individuals. We need family and family structures in order to
function correctly. Internalized relationships with self-destructive objects are counterproductive
to the needed compensation for the damaged self, for instance, due to empathic failure with
significant persons such as a father. Considering all of this, I thought about my present
relationship with a young man by the name of Howard with whom I have had the opportunity to
be a friend and mentor. Howard lacks an older male self-object in his immediate family and is at
threat of finding self-destructive compensatory structures. Because the father is out of the
picture, I have to be a father-figure for Howard.
My friend Howard is tall, dark-skinned, handsome, smart, and athletic. He likes to run
and enjoys sports. His speed puts him at an advantage while playing Ultimate Frisbee twice a
week. He is the star player of the team. He is the only African American person on the team.
There have been other African Americans to join the team, but Howard is the most consistent
and visible. The rest of the players are white males and females. Howard feels very
comfortable relating with white people. He once lived with a white family for a month. This was
the home of Brian, his friend on the team. Howards stay with Brian was steady up until Brians
mom asked him to move out. Apparently, Howard had been given an ultimatum. He had to find
a job or volunteer at a facility in Buckhead. Howard did not do either and was asked to leave.
Howard suggested that there were some misunderstandings that put him in a situation of
homelessness. This was not the first time Howard was on the streets because he left home a
year earlier.
Howard believes that he can always depend on friends to keep him from having to go
back to live with his mother. Howard keeps close ties with three best friends, Brian, Kevin, and
Jabri. Kevin and Jabri are two males born into upper-middle class African American families.
Howard calls his friends frequently and hangs out with them. Howards friends have cars.

Howard does not have a drivers license. They come to pick him up whenever they have gas
money. Every time Howard moves, he seems to move to areas far away from where his best
friends live. Sometimes he moves to areas that have no bus routes or train stations. At that
point he has to depend on favors and rides to get to his games and back home. Howard does
not work and is unable to make any financial contribution toward gas. Howard does not mind
asking for favors. For him, those that have things should share what they have with him.
With regards to the Good-Enough Mentoring model, I immediately have two concerns
about Howard and Howards perception of himself. My first concern is his unwieldy embracing
of Ultimate Frisbee, including his association with the white race, and his disassociation with his
own family. James Cone suggests that our world tries constantly to change us and influence
how we dress, feel, and think. Moreover, African Americans unknowingly value certain things
and devalue others based on a system that was not designed by or for African Americans. We
have to be careful not to down-play ourselves, not to undermine our being because we have
been hoodwinked, bamboozled, and led astray by a society that sets norms and does not have
our best interests at heart. My second concern is for his lack of work ethic and constant
dependence upon others to provide for his needs and wants. Naim Akbar speaks poignantly
about African American mens need to be re-educated about themselves including their selfworth. Also, he discusses the fallacious perception of work that cripples many African American
men. The heart of both of these theologians arguments is that God knit the African American
male together in his mothers womb. And African American men have to learn to honor God and
Gods creation by first honoring and respecting who they are in creation. As suggested in the
139th psalm, we should see ourselves as being fearfully and wonderfully made. In other words,
God is very intentional when God makes an African American male. God did not make a
mistake when God made us. The mistake we make is not embracing who we are. Many make
the mistake of trying to be something other than what God has made them to be. We are born
an original but many of us die a copy. Liberation occurs once a person stops trying to fit in.

James Cone, the father of Black Liberation Theology, suggests that African Americans
need to take a deep introspective look at who we are and where we are as a people with regard
to progress and thriving in the American Capitalistic society. Cone notes that white theology has
not been intentional in dealing with racism in America. African Americans have suffered unjustly
in a white-supremacist system that stereotypes, marginalizes, and disenfranchises African
Americans. Moreover, if African American people will go on living and doing business as usual,
we will only contribute to the furtherance of our own disappointment and hostility that generally
comes out as misplaced anger and rage.1 Cones observations make us take a real look at who
we are as a people and the systemic, strategic, and sordid actions of white people that
undermine, manipulate, and oppress African American people. There has been no significant
culture shift from the past; normalcy is still defined by the Caucasian. Whites are privileged in
society and it shows up in most, if not all aspects of life.
We constantly see subliminal attacks against people of color encapsulated in movie
scripts and films. Stereotypes are exemplified that make many think that to be an African
America male is undesirable. Among many negative images, stereotypes suggest that African
American men resort to violent, animalistic lashing out when things do not go our way. Talented
actor, Samuel L. Jackson often portrays characters embodying bleak stereotypes that cripple so
many African American men today. For instance, in the movie Changing Lanes (2002) Jackson
was disheveled and unorganized. Jackson was a substance abuser, wrestling with an alcohol
addiction. The law did not work for him in a traffic violation or in a court appearance for custody
of his children. There seemed to be a perpetual cycle of failure and disappointment for him in
all affairs of his life. Much like the dilemma of many African American men, however, the
ignorance of Jacksons character led to his disintegration. We can be ignorant of our own
authority. Many, like Jackson, do not know that they have the ability to manage themselves.
African American men do not have to remain the attraction of chaos. Part of our problem is that
1

James H. Cone, A Black Theology of Liberation (Maryknoll, NY: Orbis Books, 1986), 1-20.

we are always haphazardly engaging. Generally, when African American men are reacting in an
emotional state we never think or look beyond the circumstance.
James Cone makes us consider the difference between being Black and being African
American, which speaks volumes to this predicament. Accordingly, to be African American is to
perpetuate this insanity, doing the same thing over and over while expecting different results. To
be Black is to be interested in the ultimate well-being of self.2 African American is a mindset
internalized of white supremacy, trying to fit in, experiencing oneself as ill-equipped. To be black
is to be in opposition to anything that is oppressive. We do not need to try to deny our
blackness. We certainly do not need to idealize and adopt the ways of white people, especially
when society has suggested that the black race is insignificant. Whiteness is about being
committed to the perpetuity of white dominance and oppression of African Americans. God
wants us to be liberated in our minds, body and spirit. African American men can benefit from
counseling. In counseling, we are impelled to stop, be still, and reflect. Unfortunately, many of
us have been traditionally taught to never be self-soothing. We find self-objects, including a
wife, children, or a job that replicate the same disenchanted situation.
Akbar has also written essays that make us think about the reality of a damaged psyche
within the minds of African Americans. He takes a modern psychological approach that is
African-centered and beneficial for the descendants of slaves in America. His concept of being
re-educated is posited and is designed to lift the veil of ignorance that overshadows many
African American men. In being re-educated we can learn to relinquish the hopelessness,
meaninglessness, and lovelessness in our individual and collective lives. Through Natural
Psychology we are able to mature into a state of being where we value ourselves individually
and we see ourselves simultaneously being valued by our connection in our community.
Because I am, my community is; because my community is, I am. This concept is reminiscent
of the African adage, I am because we are; we are, therefore I am.
2

James H. Cone, 21-39.

Akbar suggests that the African American male has to take an introspective look and
admit that he needs to unlearn some things. The truth of the matter is that slavery was
detrimental to the minds of African American people and there have been some residual effects
that persist and plague African Americans to this day. For instance, Akbar talks about how work
was associated with punishment and the avoidance of work was associated with freedom.
Today, too many African American men lack work ethic that has been passed down from slavery.
Too many are involved in get-rich-quick schemes. Some depend on women to provide
sustenance and finances. Others get involved in questionable, unethical, immoral businesses
because of greed and convenience. Nonetheless, joblessness persists mostly because of the
effortlessness of many African American men hanging onto excuses. As Akbar acknowledged,
The ability to look successful without doing any identifiable work became the image of affluence
of many street hustlers and pimps.3
The African American male has to adopt a new paradigm that will last. The paradigm
has to be authentic. Authenticity is associated with that which is true and genuine. Akbar
suggests, and I concur that we have to believe that our decisions are consistent with the laws of
nature, are consistent with the order of nature, and are consistent with the responsibility of
humanity and its evolution towards the right path of human evolvement. We have to
understand that we are a part of a universal process of truth, and that truth is on our side.
Marcus Garvey once said that man is the individual who is able to shape his own character,
master his own will, direct his own life, and shape his own ends. For Akbar, we can be men
without anything except our human dignity, our character, and our will power. A vision for black
men is drawn from a metaphysical conception of the order of the universe. It must incorporate
the triumphs over encounters with disordered life forms and it must have a sustained
conception of the resurrecting, regenerative, and transformative nature of human existenceIt
must consider that life events and causative factors cannot be gleaned from observations of the
3

Naim Akbar, Breaking The Chains of Psychological Slavery (Tallahassee, FL: Mind Productions, 1996), 5.

immediate circumstances, but must understand the interplay of multiple and metaphysical
causationThe body does not even experience tension that is not simultaneously registered in
the mental and spiritual spheres.then we can move beyond seeing ourselves as endangered
victims and seeing ourselves as agents of self-determining creators of change.4
All African American men, including my mentee Howard, can benefit from a new
paradigm and vision for their lives. Presently, this is a very critical time in the life of Howard as
he transitions from boyhood to manhood. He is finding it difficult to define the lines between his
fantasies, or fleeting delusions, and his Phantasy, his real desires concerning how he wants to
see himself.

Unfortunately, Howard did not finish High School, and he is presently working

towards earning a GED. Howard feels that he has talents in music, acting, cooking, and sports.
Howards wish and dream is to become a successful actor with big pictures on the screen.
Howard would like to be a chef, an actor, and a Marine. Like many young African American
men, Howard has many dreams and desires, and needs guidance and support from others. He
has great ideas, but finds the game of life very challenging because of many challenges and
distractions in society. Howard does not mind talking about his concerns and anxieties. He
often engages others with his queries about life and his future. He recalls stories of the past
and acknowledges his disappointments. Howard knows of his struggle and admits of past
failures where he became a part of the status quo. He once sold marijuana in order to make
money to try to compensate for the lack of financial support from his mother and father.
However, Howard was smart enough to get out of the drug game. Howard has a daily struggle
of combating nihilism which is prevalent in his immediate surroundings.
The famous German philosopher, Friedrich Nietzsche spoke of nihilism as a natural
repercussion of a society resting on the shoulders of self-righteous, self-centered political,
moral, and intellectual authority. The ideals of 19th century Europe were based on the
rationalizations of a select few, and Nietzsche asserted that this group only pretended to have
4

Naim Akbar, Visions for Black Men (Tallahassee, FL: Mind Productions, 1991), ix-xi.

everyones interest at heart. The system by default marginalized and disenfranchised the
common people.5 By the same token, Cornel West has identified the detriment of modern
America with succumbing to impositions of a society who does not have the African Americans
interest at heart. The result is nihilistic threat, the nemesis of the survival of African American
men and women. West defines nihilistic threat as a loss of hope and absence of meaning.
Nihilistic threat far exceeds that of oppression or exploitation in America.6 According to G-dman,
nihilism could be summed up as corporate depression.
When the ancestors of African Americans were very successful in cultivating healthy self
images, we now suffer from amnesia. This is mostly attributable to our adoption of Americas
capitalistic society. The media and cable television have been very instrumental in undermining
our proud legacy, and desensitizing spiritual people by promoting hedonistic lifestyles. White
supremacy has victimized African Americans with its own system of normalcy. Moreover, we
have victimized ourselves by trading meaningful values for meaningless ideals. Tavis Smiley
compiled and edited How to make Black America better: Leading African Americans speak out
(2001) in which there was an overwhelming consensual, unfortunate observation of self-inflicting
actions that are being perpetrated by our people against themselves. This is what Cornel West
coined as walking nihilism.7 In other words, because so many people feel the strain to keep up
with our ever-growing, global and technological society, a sense of hopelessness, lovelessness,
and meaninglessness prevails. Furthermore, nihilism and nihilistic threat in society influences
Americans and particularly African Americans self-destructive behavior.
Wests cultural criticism suggests a means of combating nihilism through our collective
efforts. The first suggestion is the revamping of leadership in our communities that are informed
of our dire situations and who are resourceful in meeting the needs of the people spiritually,
psychologically, through empowerment. I agree with Wests affirmation of the fact that nihilism
5

Ted Honderich, ed., The Oxford Guide to Philosophy (New York, NY: Oxford University Press, 2005), 656.
Cornel West, Race Matters (New York, NY: Random House, 1994), 23.
7
Cornel West, The Political Intellectual, in The Cornel West Reader (New York, NY: Basic Civitas Books,
1999), 293.
6

cannot be overcome by debates or critical analyses, but through love and care. There must be
dialogue that is not preachy or condescending. Love overcomes all evil. There needs to be
self-love and self-respect as well as a love and genuine concern for one another. Counseling
should aim to strengthen the sense of self, as well as family structures, and promote friendship.
It should not promote complete individualism and separatism. Ministries could help ward off the
nihilism by preaching and promoting holiness and unconditional love. Essentially, this is a battle
that requires a renewing of our individual and collective minds.
Heinz Kohut suggested that introspection and empathy should be looked at as an
informer of appropriate action. Introspection and empathy are terms that Self Psychology helps
us to understand. Because of the grandiosity of self-experience, we replicate relations that
keep us in a cycle of not advancing ourselves. Thusly, we have to be very intentional of
deciding on who we are and what we are going to do with who we are. When we start talking
about acting appropriately, we have to take into consideration the relativity of our actions with
regard to how we see ourselves in relation to others. It is challenging enough to view oneself
with honest, sober reflection and be willing to justify our actions as being grounded in self-love
co-existing with a concern for the common good. This is especially hard for the African
American because of the residuals of slavery impacting our behavior. In addition, the African
American male is negatively impacted by the present white system of normalcy. There is much
frustration persistent among our race. And there is justification for this sentiment. And the
question remains: How should African American men respond to all of this information
summed-up in the Good-Enough mentoring paradigm?
The first thing we need to do is to begin to engage in sober conversations with one
another. We should realize that it is okay to be upset and utterly distraught at our predicament.
In the midst of it all, once we get to that point where we cant hold it in, we are actually where we
need to be. The psychologist calls it optimal frustration. In other words, there is an optimal
level of frustration with having your needs provided and providing them for yourself. This

optimal frustration is what one needs for encouragement to take over, for oneself, what others
have been doing. For without this optimal frustration, we will not move forward, but will stay
stagnant if we do not have a healthy image and idea about ourselves. Essentially, when you
are not getting the empathic responsiveness that you want from anybody, you will be motivated
to go and do for yourselves. This is very real, and is a good thing for the growing, maturing
person to learn to do. At some point and time, we have to get up and do something for
ourselves in order to help ourselves.
In conclusion, Good-Enough Mentoring can be the springboard for the renewal of the
black mans mind, body, and spirit. Much of the model is centered on the importance of
discovering, knowing, and being who you are. Once we consider that God was intentional when
God knit the African American male together and that the world has been intentional in how it
plays itself out with the white system of normalcywe can begin to move in the right direction.
The right direction is the direction of self-love, self-preservation, and self-healing. Then we can
become the embodiment of the poem put forth by William Earnest Henley (1849-1903):
Out of the night that covers me,
Black as the Pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.
In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeoning of chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed.
Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds, and shall find me, unafraid.
It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll,
I am the master of my fate;
I am the captain of my soul.
Finally, as summed-up in this poem, we can master our fate; we can be the captain of our soul.
This is what makes us distinctive. This is what makes us powerful. This is being who we be.
Bibliography

Akbar, Naim. Breaking the Chains of Psychological Slavery. Tallahassee, FL: Mind
Productions, 1996.
Akbar, Naim. Visions for Black Men. Tallahassee, FL: Mind Productions, 1991.
Cone, James H. A Black Theology of Liberation. Maryknoll, NY: Orbis Books, 1986.
Honderich, Ted, ed. The Oxford Guide to Philosophy. New York, NY: Random House, 1994.
Smiley, Tavis, ed. How to make Black America Better: Leading African Americans Speak Out.
New York, NY: Anchor Books, 2001.
West, Cornel. The Political Intellectual. In The Cornel West Reader, edited by Cornel West,
278-301. New York, NY: Basic Civitas Books, 1999.
West, Cornel. Race Matters. New York, NY: Random House, 1994.