WEEK 30, SEPTEMBER 1993

Report from Week 30, in which you were asked to interpret any of four Rorschach ink blots.
Disturbing results. Thousands of entries, many of them too crude to publish even for the Style
Invitational, which traffics proudly in subliminal poopy jokes. The things you saw in these innocuous
blots! And you were unnervingly synchronous: More than a dozen of you turned Blot C upside down and
saw Ross Perot in a pith helmet explaining his economic program, using Richard Nixon hand puppets.
Frankly, it weirded us out.
+Seventh Runner-Up: (Ink Blot A) Brain surgery by corkscrew, a money-saving procedure under the
Clinton health plan (Patricia Smith, Fairfax Station)

Our first ink

blot contest, in the pre-Staake Year 1. Results are in the column. (Blots and cartoon by Marc Rosenthal
for The Washington Post )
+Sixth Runner-Up: (Ink Blot A, upside down) Bill Clintons Harley, with training wheels (Ken Wood,
Columbia)
+Fifth Runner-Up: (Ink Blot C) Minnie Mouse at the gynecologist (Wendy Borsari, Washington; also,
Dave Zarrow, Herndon, and Heidi Moore, Alexandria)
+Fourth Runner-Up: (Ink Blot D) J. Edgar Hoover, playing Im a Little Teapot (Sue Davis, Beltsville)

+Third Runner-Up: (Ink Blot D) The avenging angel of clubbed baby seals (Chuck Smith, Woodbridge)
+Second Runner-Up: (Ink Blot D, upside down) A rabbinical student flexes his muscles for the muchcoveted Mr. Tel Aviv trophy (Matthew J. Peterkin, Washington)
+First Runner-Up: (Ink Blot C) I cant keep going and going and going. My feet are killing me! (James
H. McDonough, Indian Head)
And the winner of the two-person horse costume:

Bob wasnt credited for these blots from

1994, but thats his first Loser T-shirt shown above them. (Bob Staake for The Washington Post )
(Ink Blot C) Disney horror! Mickey Mouse spotted carrying two severed heads! (Steven King,
Alexandria)
Honorable Mentions:
Ink Blot A:
Carmen Miranda on a bad fruit day (Dan and Lecia Harbacevich, Stephens City, Va.; also, Claire Timms,
Fredericksburg)
Dogs spit-in-the-cup contest (Ann Hall, Fort Belvoir)
The Mayan god of panhandlers (Gregory Dunn and Karen Wright, Alexandria)

Two Bavarian beer drinkers with big hangovers (Barbara Kallas, Washington)
Ink Blot B:
Socks found sleeping on Pennsylvania Avenue (Bob & Lisa Waters, Andrews Air Force Base)
Socks, after 10 minutes in the dryer (Lynne DePaso, Herndon)
(upside down) Olive Oyl on the cotton-candy weight gain plan (Chuck Smith, Woodbridge)
Garfield the Sailor Man (Bill Myrons, Crofton; also, Adam Hirschfeld, Annandale)
(upside down) Lani Guinier, cheerleader (Joyce Small, Herndon)
The Tasmanian devil at ballet class (Beth Tucker, Manassas)
Ink Blot C:
(upside down) The Big Bad Wolf polishes off that first little piggy (Mike Thring, Leesburg)
Attack rabbit as seen by Jimmy Carter (Stu Segal, Vienna)
New, non-threatening Tailhook convention logo (Robin D. Grove, Washington)
(upside down) Bob Dole (Elizabeth Rangan, Dayton, Md.)
Ink Blot D:
(upside down) The director of Roseanne backs the star into her chair through hand signals (Chuck
Smith, Woodbridge)
A Lamb-Chop-skin rug (Dan and Lecia Harbacevich, Stephens City, Va.)
Cabbage Patch roadkill (Katherine Struck, Columbia)
--The second go at the ink blots was in Week 77, in September 1994. By then we had a new cartoonist,
some whippersnapper in St. Louis named Bob Staake. .
FOR WEEK 77, 1994:
Report from Week 77, in which you were asked to interpret Rorschach blots. Many of the better entries
utilized more than one of the blots. One of our favorites was by Noah Schenendorf of Gaithersburg, who
said all six blots, taken together, represented works of modern art by Desmond Howard, for which
Redskins GM Charlie Casserly paid millions.
Third Runner-Up: (Blot 3) This ultrasound view of the female abdomen shows that storks really are
involved in human reproduction. (Steve Dunham, Fredericksburg)

Second Runner-Up: (Blot 1) What [The Symbol Known as Prince] intends to name his first son. (Kevin
Mellema, Falls Church)
First Runner-Up: (Blot 6) It was not until deeper excavations on Easter Island that the colostomy bags
were discovered. (Chuck Smith, Woodbridge)
And the Winner of the Two Frogs Playing Pool: Halloween in Georgetown (See illustration at top of
page) (Dennis Goris, Alexandria)
Blot No. 1
A chandelier made from the spines and vertebrae of politicians. (Richard E. Brock, Adelphi)
Major league baseball owners have resorted to genetic engineering to produce replacement players. Initial
attempts have been unsuccessful. (Kurt Larrick, Burke)
The common wishbone, redesigned to meet federal safety standards. (John J. Kammer, Herndon)
Blot No. 2
Marilyn Quayle comes face to face with the Devil. (D.J. Dohahey, Reston)
The controversial Shroud of Mary Tyler Moore. (Gloria Federico, Springfield)
Blot No. 3
The Cowardly Lion after cosmetic surgery. His doctor misunderstood when told the lion wanted little
tucks around his eyes. (Ann M. Burton, N. Bethesda)
Dan Quayles Zero Population Growth Plan involves Air Force fighters destroying stork habitats. (Earl
Gilbert, La Plata)
The June Taylor Dancers performing Swan Lake. (Larry Gordon, Potomac)
Blot No. 4
What Madonna wears to church. (Susan Davis, Beltsville)
A reflected image of a decapitated buffalo, next years Bills logo if they lose the Super Bowl again. (T.L.
McBride, Upper Marlboro)
Blot No. 5
(Upside down) Opus, bound and gagged. (Stu Segal, Vienna)
(Upside down) A rear view of refrigerator repair men building a human pyramid. (Marta Graffy Sparrow,
Springfield)
Mickey Mouse checking Stan Laurel for head lice. (Doug Burns, Falls Church)

The ill-conceived Mighty Morphin Power Penguin. (Mike Thring, Leesburg)

Blot No. 6
The jacket cover for the new book Women of the Supreme Court. (Joseph Romm, Washington)
Manic-depressive thought balloons. (Chuck Smith, Woodbridge)
There were constant arguments between the twins as to who would get to wear both earrings that night.
(Paul A. Alter, Hyattsville)
(Upside down) A new form of birth control: ankle weights for sperm. (Bill Epstein, Bethesda)
And Last: Mr. Style Comes a-Courtin (Kathleen Pendracky, Avella, Pa.)
And finally ...
WEEK 148, 1996
Report from Week 148, in which we asked you to interpret any of four ink blots [see them here]:

Second Runner-Up: (Blot A,

upside down) A pair of giant, cleavage-feeding hummingbirds attack two women involved in a tug of war
for the last Wonderbra in the lingerie department. (James Hopenfeld, Arlington)
First Runner-Up: (Blot A) In a stunning reversal, crabs get a man. (Chuck Smith, Woodbridge)
And the winner of The Scream by Edvard Munch:
(Blot B) The American Bar Association logo: two vultures on a field of billing receipts. (Jennifer Hart,
Arlington)

Honorable Mentions:
Blot A:
(Upside down) Bob Dole wearing his campaign smile enhancer. (Kirsten Schneider, Fairfax)
A supine woman with exposed reproductive tract and several links of sausage draped across her belly.
What pervert devised this contest, anyway? Jim Ketchum, Columbia)
Mr. Toad and his hat at an X-rated movie. (Chuck Smith, Woodbridge)
Blot B:
Two flying monkeys, each of which first wonders if the woman who left her tennis shoes and bra at his
feet will learn to love him, and then thinks, Yeah, and maybe a flying monkey will fly out of my butt.
(Mike Connaghan, Gaithersburg)
(Upside down) The Reliable Source, Annie Groer and Ann Gerhart. (Jim Day, Gaithersburg)
Blot C:
(With musical notes) Mighty Mouse to save the daaaay . . . (Audrey Scruggs, Alexandria)
(Sideways) The Ear No One Reads. (Mike Connaghan, Gaithersburg)
Leonardo Da Vinci even left sketches for the Wonderbra. (Jessica Steinhice, Washington)
Autopsy X-ray shows Elviss real cause of death: a severely worn-out pelvis. (Dave Zarrow, Herndon)
Blot D:
Overlooked footprint recently discovered at the murder site by O.J.s investigators. (Elden Carnahan,
Laurel)
Bad: An octopus is thrown onto the ice during a hockey game. Worse: The Zamboni runs over it. (Jennifer
Hart, Arlington)
Georghe Muresans wisdom tooth. (David M. Magness, Arlington)
An octopus with at least a million tentacles, probably more. Louis Farrakhan (Greg Pickens,
Alexandria)
The Eggplant From the Black Lagoon. (Jonathan Paul, Garrett Park)
What John Bobbitts appendage would have looked like if Lorena had had access to a shredder. (Priscilla
Pellegrino, Great Falls)
A squid on Prozac. (Tim Sweeney, Churchville)

All blots The family tree. (Nancy Israel, Bethesda) [Dont try something like this for Week 1185]
And Last: (All blots) They are the first four letters of the alphabet. I dont know what your problem was.
This has GOT to be the easiest contest Ive ever seen. (Mike Connaghan, Gaithersburg)