have joined recently. I like to think that I am a good writer and trainer.

In the last four years over 200 write-ups of mine have been published. I
have selected 70 of them and would gladly send it to anyone who asks
for it. One of the most recent is :

Success is a matter of attitude.

Your attitude and how people see you is more important to

success than all your qualifications. You may have a lot of
information crammed up in your head but have you learnt to
"Apply" it in real life situations? What Image are you projecting?
What Impression are you creating? Have you considered how your
habits and mental assumptions are being judged by others?

I relate an incident from my own life when I was teaching French,

Acting as Trainer for teachers, running an institution and
Counseling disturbed students. I was on top of the world and with
all my education, job experience and all, I was sure my view-point
was uncontestable. I was absolutely certain that when I spoke
people would consider my word as final; there was no iota of
doubt that I was listened to and people were seeing me as the
wise old one. With my strong training in languages and special
training in teaching, I normally am able to make my point quite
precisely and accurately and in my mind I was certain that people
were definitely understanding me and listening to me.

Life has shown how wrong I was!

For one, a friend said that they came to me to talk because

they were certain of passing away an hour or two without much
effort. All they needed to do was to ask me a provocative
question and this would ensure that I kept lecturing them for the
next hour or two.
What a blow it was to my vanity!

Another friend told me that they could not understand half the
words and expressions I was using. This was the second blow.

Lastly I was told by an aunt that I should stop lecturing on

children. What after all did I know about them? It seems
according to the accepted wisdom, only people who have had their
own children can know anything about them. This was absolutely
illogical but I just did not have the energy to argue further.

I suppose from the above I have made clear how erroneously we

can be assuming to know ourselves and what we think of our image
can be totally opposite in reality.

What is the most important question bothering you today? The

answer to which would change/help-you-reach-your-goal in life.

What finally determines if you will be successful or not?

There are many possibilities and many answers to this

question. The correct answer is of course a matter of

personal perception. This leaves room for much argument.
Yet for argument's sake let's squeeze the nectar out of the
fruit of most experienced and successful people and we will
see the truth of the matter more in its entirety and
simplicity.

When we talk of success we normally understand it in terms

of the American Dream which equates success with financial
worth. This is the most generally spread notion. Again for
arguments sake if we do accept it, the next question is how
to manage arriving there.

The first step though has to be preparation; this means

education and training to become a product that has value
to others. Your financial success as an employee depends on
how valuable an asset others perceives you to be to them or
their organization. The word that crops up again here as you
will notice is "Perceive". Let's take another situation; a
business of your own. You have product or/and services to
sell. Your success depends on how your customer perceives
you for fulfillment of his requirement. If it is a product, does
it meet his perceived needs? He will know it only after he
has bought the product and used it. So your homework if
done well to make the product is done well, you will end up
selling successfully. If it is a service there will be not only
the final product but also your personal behavior pattern
that will be playing a big part in the successful culmination
of the transaction. It is all in the perception of the client.

The trick therefore is to be "perceived" as valuable and

necessary to others right from form the word go. How does
one do that?

What is the first thing from which a person will judge you?
This is a no-brainer. Of course what he will try to see in you
is how you are dealing with him and his requirement. Are
you being attentive, honest; do you come through as
reliable and as friendly; do you see things on a similar plane
to his; do you come on as arrogant, inflexible or the
opposite? The first impression can make or mar the future
relationship.

So finally we come to the crux of the question. What attitude

do you wear and does the other person see the image you
are trying to project on to him? To answer this question a
certain maturity is essentially required. First one needs to be
clinically honest and accept that the image of yourself in
your mind is rarely what you are projecting on to others.
Second is the fact that you may be plagued with a totally
erroneous image of yourself. Thirdly you may be in gross
error in gauging the views and requirements of others. Both
in terms of an employee or a businessman, you can be
successful only when you can positively say that you know
yourself very correctly and you have the ability to project
the image you want to.

Good sense advises us to first learn about how the rest of

the world thinks, behaves and expects you to think and
behave. Then you have to modulate your own image
accordingly. This requires again an objectivity which
individuals rarely show. It would be wise to admit that we
are not always 100% sure of the accurate image we are
projecting. The moment we accept this fact, the act of
transformation begins. This does not mean that you have a

negative personality but it is simply a remark to highlight

the point that there is always room for improvement.

But if you are sincerely interested in being successful then

there is a lot of reading material available to show you the
way. Pay attention to quotations and notice and keep aside
the ones that strike you as worthwhile. Study books and
articles on self-improvement. Books and articles by
management experts always have something in them to
learn from.

Part of your attitude is also the philosophy that makes you

tick. By philosophy it is meant the values and rules that are
shaping your thoughts and actions. A good approach is to
attach yourself to the people you admire and try and
become like them. Of course the final result will depend on
the person you choose as your mentor.

Most attitude discordant notes stem from two sources:

1) The upringing and environment one has grown up in
2) Self-centredness.
In one's arrogance of being somebody we easily forget that society is a multi layered
group. Different behavior patterns and rules run in different groups. One needs to study
each other's groups and understand their needs.
Self-centredness does not need any expalanation It blinds us to see only what is
convinient and useful to us. This will never bring success as it alienates
For different people success means different things. Most of the people equate
success with reaching a particular goal. But success is not a destination but
it is a road. You can be successful everyday if what you are doing has
following impact:
1. You have grown towards your potential
2. You have sown some seeds that will take you towards your dream
3. You have sown seeds that is foing to be helpful to the society.

Therefore our money, fame, power are not success. Irs our Attitude.