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Nathan Torres
Professor Lervold
Communication 100
Perception Checking
Perceptions play a major role in communication. There are many things that influence
our perception such as access to information, physiological influences, psychological influences,
social influences, and cultural influences. A common tendency in perceptions is attribution,
which is when a person attaches meaning to a behavior. This often causes people to make snap
judgments. Sometimes perceptions can be out of synch causing conflict between two
communicators. An example of this can be seen between a couple. Let's say a couple is sitting
together on the sofa. One person in the relationship is being unusually quiet. The other person
in the relationship is confused due to this behavior and asks "Why are you mad at me?" The
person who is being quiet then becomes defensive and asks "Who said I was?" The other person
then responds saying "Well you are not talking to me which means you must be mad at me."
This shows how people can make snap judgments and is one of many examples that shows how
it is easy for a communicator to jump to a wrong conclusion and make an assumption that is
incorrect. Luckily, there is a tool a communicator can use that helps us understand our
perceptions and the perceptions of others. Now instead of jumping to a conclusion, one of the
ways to review and share your assumptions is to use perception checking.
Perception checking is a tool that helps us understand others without assuming that our
interpretations are correct. This prevents people from making snap judgments and to look at a
situation from different points of view. The goal of perception checking is to reach a mutual
understanding. Perception checking does this by using a cooperative approach to a situation.

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This tool also shows respect and concern for the other person showing them that the person
questioning them cares and wants to understand what he/she is feeling.
A complete perception check consists of three parts. The first part is a description of the
behavior you noticed. The second part is to address two possible interpretations of the behavior.
The third part is a request for clarification about how to interpret the behavior. For example,
going back to the example in the first paragraph, a couple is sitting on the sofa and one person in
the relationship is being unusually quiet. This is the description of the behavior being noticed.
Next, instead of assuming that person is mad, the other person needs to give two possible
interpretations as to why he/she is being unusually quiet. An example of this is for the other
person to ask whether he/she is sad or angry. After giving two possible interpretations of the
behavior, the other person then needs to give a request for clarification. An example of this is
saying "How do you really feel?" or "What's up?" A complete example of this perception check
is "You have been unusually quiet lately [behavior], I am not sure if you are just sad [first
interpretation] or if you are angry at me [second interpretation]. How do you really feel?
[request for clarification]" This will allow for the person who is being quiet to realize that
his/her partner cares and wishes to know how he/she is feeling. This perception check will allow
the other person to express their feeling and will state that he or she is sad or angry, and from
there, the couple could then talk about why that person is sad or angry.
An example of using perception checking from my personal experience in an actual
communication event can be seen with my friends. A time I can remember using perception
checking was last year. The event took place at Golden West College. I was walking the campus
and I passed by my friend and said "hey Tom." We were walking the same path and I knew he
saw me from afar, however when I passed by him, he started to look down at his phone while I

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said "hey." When I said "hey," I stopped for a moment thinking he would stop and say "hey"
back to me, but he did not. After the incident I went home as usual. That night, I was thinking if
I had recently done anything to upset Tom. I thought maybe I told a joke that offended Tom or
maybe I accidently ignored him one day. The next day during break I saw him again with a
group of my other friends. In the group he was laughing and joking around and was back to his
usual self. After we exchanged jokes, Tom and I started walking, I was walking back to class
and Tom had a class near mine. Tom was being quiet and I thought he was still mad at me. I
used perception checking on Tom to figure out whether he was mad at me or not. I stated the
behavior descriptor saying "Tom, I passed by you yesterday and I said hello, however you looked
at your phone and ignored me and kept walking by." Then I stated two possible interpretations.
I said "Are you mad at me, or did you not hear me say hello?" Then I stated a request for
clarification saying "So what's up, everything okay?" Tom then said, "you said 'hey' to me
yesterday?" It was obvious to see that Tom truly did not hear me say hello to him. Tom said
"I'm sorry man, I didn't hear you, I had a big test yesterday that I was thinking about and I was
studying by reading the book on my phone." At that point I felt dumb for even thinking that
Tom, one of my best friends, would ignore me for no reason. I said to Tom "ya, I thought you
were mad at me or something, I was wondering why you would ignore me." Tom said "ya, I
didn't even see or hear you, I was so focused on trying to read the book from my phone, I needed
a good grade on that test in order for me to bump my grade up from a B to an A." After the
discussion, Tom and I continued to walk to our class and everything was back to normal. At the
time, I did not know what a perception check was, however I did it. I figured it was the best way
to approach the situation instead of accusing Tom of just ignoring me. Since I knew we were
best friends, I knew there was no way he would just ignore me and that there would of had to be

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a good reason for him not to say "hey" back. Perception checking made the situation better and
it shows how this tool can prevent a person from jumping to conclusions. It also helped me
understand Tom's actions, it created a mutual understanding, and it strengthened the friendship.

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