Catigan, Angienette Richelle N.

2014-0703

A. Detest Simplifiable Jargon

Original:
In this case, Weng Sai Qin was unable to testify in the administrative
proceedings before the BID because she left the country on February 6, 1993,
or even before the administrative complaint against petitioner was instituted.
Revised:
Here, Weng Sai Qin was unable to testify in court because she left the country
before the complaint against petitioner was instituted.
(Records, p. 53)

B. Use Strong and Precise Verbs

Original:
The petitioners and the private respondent are substantially in agreement
concerning the facts as found by the Trial Court.
Revised:
Both parties agreed substantially concerning the facts as found by the Trial
Court.
(G.R. No. L-514450, February 10, 1989)

C. Turn -ion Words into Verbs

Original:
Wherefore, it is respectfully prayed that after proper hearing, the defendant
be adjudged guilty of contempt of court, and be committed to prison until he
withdraws the application, or asks for the cancellation and revocation of any
authority that might be granted him in case No. 48802 of the Public Service
Commission.
Revised:
Wherefore, it is respectfully prayed that after proper hearing, the defendant

be adjudged guilty of contempt of court, and be committed to prison until he

withdraws the application, or asks any authority to be cancelled and revoked
that might be granted him in case No. 48802 of the Public Service
Commission.
(G.R. No. L-46174, November 29, 1938)

D. Simplify wordy Phrases

Original:
The plaintiffs-appellants rely on the survey plats of the claims of Albert Wright
on the two mining claims, which plats were approved in 1907 by the Director
of Lands and on a publication entitled "The Mineral Resources of the
Philippine Islands for the Years 1921, 1922 and 1923" issued by the Division
of Geology and Mines, Bureau of Mines, Manila, and which was printed in
1925 by the Bureau of Printing.
Revised:
The plaintiffs-appellants rely on the survey plats claim of Albert Wright on the
two mining claims, which were approved in 1907 by the Director of Lands and
on a publication entitled "The Mineral Resources of the Philippine Islands for
the Years 1921, 1922 and 1923" issued by the Division of Geology and Mines,
Bureau of Mines, Manila, and which was printed in 1925 by the Bureau of
Printing.
(G.R. No. L-18904, July 11, 1964)

E. Avoid Doublets and Triplets

Original:
To permit parties to alter and modify their contracts as they please, and to
hold the sureties answerable for the performance of such parts as were not
altered, would be transferring their responsibility, without their consent, from
one contract to another.
Revised:
To permit parties to modify their contracts as they please, and to hold the
sureties answerable for the performance of such parts as were not altered,
would be transferring their responsibility, without their consent, from one
contract to another.
(G.R. No. L-13307, February 3, 1919)

F. Make Everything You write speakable

Original:
It is, however, here contended for the surety that the court erred in holding
him liable for any part of the debtedness which is the basis of this action.
Revised:
However, it is contended here for the surety that the court erred in holdling
him liable for any part of the debtedness which is the basis of this action.
(G.R. No. L-13307, February 3, 1919)