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Alexandra Stepanov
Dr. Grajeda
ENG 3014
5 May 2015
An Analysis of This is How You Lose Her by Junot Diaz
Junot Diazs This is How You Lose Her is comprised of nine non-linear first-person
short stories all concentrated on the love, loss, and adversities of the main character throughout
each story, Yunior. The book as a whole offers several complex and rich layers of storytelling.
The chapters offer the overarching story of Yuniors love and home life. Throughout the stories,
the Dominican protagonist cheats on every partner he is with, struggles with each breakup, and
handles the loss of his brother while finding his purpose. In this paper, I will be analyzing Diazs
story through the lenses of feminism and race studies. I will be paying particular attention to the
patriarchal and misogynistic elements, the societal imposition of gender, and the hybridity/nonessential nature of ethnic identity as seen mainly through Yuniors character.
In feminism, a literary critic analyzes the use of patriarchal (centering on men and
underestimating women) and misogynistic (not respecting women) elements through the
storys characters that either criticize or encourage sexist ideals (Parker 149). There is also a
focus on the non-essential nature of gender. Parker mentions this non-essential ideology by
stating that the rules are cultural constructions, not inevitable consequences of sexual
difference (167). This shows that feminism is interested in the way that a text shows gender to
be constructed by society.

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Yunior usually presents female characters with a description of their physical attributes
before anything else. However, it isnt just their physical description, but a description of the
traits that are considered feminine. In the first story, Yunior initially refers to Magda (the first
girlfriend) as a girl that is short with a big mouth and big hips and dark curly hair you could lose
a hand in (Diaz 5). Nilda, his brothers girlfriend, is discussed as a girl that had super-long hair,
like those Pentecostal girls, and a chest you wouldnt believe Im talking world-class (Diaz
29). Alma, another of Yuniors girlfriends, is depicted as having a long tender horse neck and a
big Dominican ass that seems to exist in a fourth dimension beyond jeans (Diaz 47). Yuniors
focus on typically sexualized and feminine characteristics, such as the big hips and breasts, gives
a simple basis for the misogyny present in Yuniors character.
An article in The Atlantic showcased Yuniors descriptions as a mental checklist of
physical attributes, a man scoping a woman's dimensions the way a butcher might rove his eye
over a calf (Fassler). The repetitive nature of Yuniors degrading characterization of female
characters and the lack of emotional description shows the audience that Yunior may not entirely
understand the female persona as a whole. He seems to see females in a two-dimensional light,
rather than taking into consideration the many facets of a female as a human. In his mind,
females seem to only serve the purpose of fitting into his checklist, rather than fitting the role of
a complex, emotional human.
Yunior is also consistently committing adultery throughout the book. There are five
women that he is emotionally involved with, a chapter dedicated to each. With each relationship,
he repeats the same pattern of infidelity. The last relationship ends with his fiance finding out
that he had cheated with about fifty women over the course of six years. Yunior sees no clear
issue with this until the final chapter.

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Many a time, Yunior dismisses the female feelings of betrayal. In the first story, after
Magda finds out Yunior cheated on her, he shortens the after-math of his serious mistake to
Anyway I wont bore you with what happens after she finds out (Diaz 5). Magdas feelings are
reduced to a sentence that passively dismisses them. When discussing his adulterous actions, he
says comments such as You know how it is. A smelly bone like that, better off buried in the
backyard of your life or You [Yunior] are overwhelmed by a pelagic sadness. Sadness at being
caught (Diaz 3, 49). These comments show Yuniors apathy towards the hurt he may be causing
the other party. The apathetic manner Yunior has of treating the women in his life further
engrains his misogynistic views.
Yuniors views on women have been influenced by outside factors. The males in his life
exhibit the same values as Yunior. He mentions comments made by his friends about the women
he dates. They claimed that, after Magda found out that Yunior was cheating on her, they would
have pulled a Total Fucking Denial (Diaz 4). When Magda gave Yunior a hard time after finding
out, they told Yunior Fuck her, dont sweat that bitch (Diaz 7). His friends hated on [one of
Yuniors girlfriends] - how skinny she was, no culo [butt], no titties, como un palito [like a
stick] (Diaz 153). They had the same view of women that Yunior partially weaves into his own
attitude towards women.
His brother and father also exemplify these ideals. Yunior mentions that he wanted to
warn her [Nilda], tell her he was a monster (Diaz 33). He describes his brothers dating and
cheating throughout, making statements such as Dude was figuerando [sleeping around] hard.
Had always been a papi chulo, so of course he dove right back into the grip (Diaz 96). He
mentions that both [his] father and [his] brother were sucios [adulterers] and that his father
would leave [him] in the car while he ran into cribs to bone his girlfriends (Diaz 165). He also

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states that his brother was no better, boning girls in the bed next to yours (Diaz 165). These
statements show that Yunior was exposed to this concept of women as a child and it was later
reinforced by his friends.
Despite all of this, Yunior still shows signs of acknowledging the fact that his concept of
women is demeaning and immoral. Most of these come from his choice of words. He justifies his
actions, but uses the word stupid in narration to describe the infidelity, shown during his first
cheating offense when he refers to it as that particular bit of stupidity and later when he calls it
an outrageous sinverguenceria [shameful action] (Diaz 3,50). He states that Years later [he]
would wonder if it hadnt been for [his] brother would [he] have done it? in reference to having
an affair with an older woman, which was something his brother had done. When he reflects on
his brother and fathers behavior with women, he says now its official: you [Yunior] are one,
too. You had hoped the gene missed you, skipped a generation, but clearly you were kidding
yourself (Diaz 165). In the later stages of the book, after the audience has seen emotional
growth from Yunior, he says You are an extraordinary young woman to one of his girlfriends,
which is uncharacteristic of him (Diaz 172). These thoughts point to an acknowledgement and
resistance towards the misogynistic mindset that has been instilled in him. He seems to want to
fight against the ideals of the men around him, but struggles. This shows that Diaz may be
making rhetorical moves to illuminate sexist attitudes and point to the injustice in the patriarchy
by showing the morality conflict against them through his seemingly conforming character. At
the end of the book, Yunior even literally blames the patriarchy when trying to point a finger at
anything but himself to get back with his fiance (Diaz 180).
He mentions, uncertainly, the idea of love between his girlfriends and him, rather than
just the idea of physical aspects of a romantic relationship. In regards to a relationship that began

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as strictly physical, Yunior narrates I was staring at you and you were staring at me and right
then it was sort of like love, wasnt it? (Diaz 89). When discussing the relationship with the
older woman, he wonder[s] if she feels like [he] do[es]. Like it might be love (Diaz 163). After
each of these highlighted relationships discussed in the book, Yunior always feels heartbroken
despite having betrayed the women that are leaving him. This also highlights the struggle Yunior
faces in wanting to listen to his heart, rather than solely displaying the values his brother and
father seem to hold.
Through race studies, this same conflicting feeling depicts Yuniors war between his
culture and himself. Race studies examines the idea of ethnic identity as a social construct,
taking a non-essentialist approach to ethnicity as opposed to the commonplace genetic idea of
ethnicity or race. It also pays attention to the complex hybrid nature of ethnic identity, as well as
racism (particularly in the form of white privilege).
This internal battle that Yunior is fighting is exemplified throughout the book with the
repeated phrase Dominican men are sucios (Diaz). The phrase is in reference to more than just
his father and brother. On the first page alone, the audience is introduced to the dangers of the
Dominican man with Magda saying that she considers [Yunior] a typical Dominican man: a
sucio, an asshole (Diaz 3). Later in that chapter, Yunior mentions that all of Magdas friends
say [he] cheated because [he] was Dominican, that all Dominican men are dogs and cant be
trusted (Diaz 18). His underlying desire to surpass these stereotypes through trying to learn how
to love and view women as more human, proven by his heartbreak and word choice, shows the
audience a divide between the typical Dominican man and Yuniors own constructed identity as a
Dominican man.

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In this phrasing alone, the audience sees a stereotype developing. Diaz seems to be saying
that this is how the world views Dominican men. This shows a deeper implication at the core of
the story. This stereotype creates a structure that is held constant because of its integration by the
very people it is demeaning. Diaz exposes the systematic structure that males of Dominican
heritage are raised into. Yunior watches his brother and father do what he eventually begins
doing. He acknowledges that he wishes it had skipped a generation, as if it was genetically
passed on and there was nothing he could do about it. Yunior also tries to resist; he does not seem
to want that lifestyle for himself, but cannot resist its temptation and comfort, much like a bad
habit that is hard to get out of. However, even when he tries to change, he is shot down and
women literally run from him. Women judge him and are afraid to be in a relationship with him
without even knowing him as a person, just because hes Dominican. This perpetuates the cycle
given that people eventually give up trying to change since others already expect a certain kind
of behavior. Yunior is led towards this vicious cycle. Evidence of this in the book is presented
when he finds the one and is told that the only thing that is not acceptable is cheating. He
proceeds to cheat on her with fifty women, despite his love and supposed devotion to her. He
goes on to blame not only the patriarchy, as mentioned previously, but Santo Domingo the
capital of the Dominican Republic (DR).
With his attempted construction, the audience sees evidence of the creation of Yuniors
own definition of Dominican. Yunior sees being Dominican as knowing Spanish, going back to
the island and feeling at home, being aware of its history, worrying about appearance and food,
eating merengue, knowing about poverty, practicing misogyny, and having ample amounts of
melanin. To break down his definition further, one of the major components of Yuniors
perspective on Dominican culture is language. Throughout the book, he portrays that a large

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portion of Dominican cultural identity stems from knowing the language. He narrates in
Spanglish as seen from the quotes presented previously. He mentions that a girl hes dating starts
speaking Spanish to his mother, which is a sign that she is reclaiming her Dominican heritage
(Diaz 48). He dates a Dominican woman that is only in the states for a few months. When she
goes back, she emphasizes that it is her home and not his (Diaz 197). Yunior tries to defend his
nationality and she retorts with Say that in Spanishand of course [he] cant (Diaz 197). From
these constant mentions of the Spanish language and their tie to Dominican identity, the audience
sees that an essential element of being considered Dominican and something considered of value
to the community is knowing the language well.
He goes on to differentiate between Dominican Dominican and Dominican from here
(Diaz 102, 29). Dominican Dominican is referred to as fresh-off-the-boat-didnt-have-nopapers (Diaz 102). Yunior himself came over to the United States at a young age, but still lived
in the DR as a child. He seems to struggle with this. Yunior was raised half in the DR and half in
the US causing confusion in his sense of self. This is evidenced through his resistance to the
stereotype, which conflicts with his show of pride in his nationality. It is also seen when he feels
ashamed that he cannot speak in Spanish towards the end of the novel. In one instance, a
girlfriend of his calls him a real Dominican and he comments to the audience that he wouldnt
rank on the Dominican index (Diaz 48). The resistance and pride that Yunior feels causes tension
and internal conflict on what his ethnic identity is.
This is further seen from his trips to the Dominican Republic. In the book, he makes
several trips to the island and back. This back and forth travel between two geographical
locations may signify a back and forth for Yuniors identity. On the first trip, his recount begins
with I love Santo Domingo. I love coming home (Diaz 9). He continues by describing the

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beautiful scenery and other things he loves, but afterwards he breaks apart the illusion of a
paradise-like island by detailing the poverty and terrible traffic (Diaz 9). The description he
provides gives the audience the impression of a love and hate relationship with the island. He
doesnt know how to feel about his home. He knows what life is like in the US and that threatens
his blindly prideful view of the DR. He is not ethnocentric with full pride in his Dominican
heritage, but rather struggling with his dual ethnic identity. He manages to mix the two identities
primarily through language with his use of bilingualism throughout the book.
The confusing hybridity of a mix of cultures is not only present in Yuniors internal
struggle. The audience sees others battle with their ethnic background and what it means as well.
In reference to a girlfriend his brother had, Yunior depicts her as from Trinidad, a cocoa panyol
[Hispanic from Trinidad], and she had this phony-as-hell English accent. It was the way we all
were back then. None of us wanted to be niggers. Not for nothing (Diaz 39). This shows the
audience a girl born in Trinidad that is of Hispanic heritage who moves to the United States and
grapples with the complicated mixture of identities that she possesses. This reaches the heart of
hybridity of ethnic identity by crossing the borders of multiple identities instead of supposing
that different identities can stay on different sides of an imposed and unsustainable dividing line
(Parker 312).
The issue of ethnic identity becomes more complex with an analysis of the actions of the
characters. The female from Trinidad tries to assimilate and create a persona that matches that of
her current location. Yunior has a hard time figuring out whether he is prideful or rejecting of his
Dominican heritage, but ultimately integrates both to create his own hybrid identity. A girlfriend
of Yuniors reclaims her Dominican heritage and begins to act like a Dominican woman by
changing her wardrobe and speaking Spanish. All of these examples point to ethnicity being

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created. Diaz portrays characters that seemingly perform an ethnicity and are concocting a
mixture of identities on their own. This shows readers a statement on the fact that the concept of
ethnicity is culturally constructed.
One of Yuniors challenges in regards to his ethnic identity was coping with the rejection
that tagged along with it in the form of racism. Readers do not see as much rejection early in the
book, however in the last short story, Yunior is bombarded with racism. He lives most of his life
up north in a community mainly comprised of Hispanics of one kind or another. In moving to
Boston, he is forced to acclimate to an environment where not everyone is Hispanic and where
Dominican men, in particular, have a bad reputation. Among the racist acts that Yunior encounter
are white people pull[ing] up at traffic lights and scream[ing] at [him] with a hideous rage
security follows [him] in stores and every time [he] steps on Harvard property [hes] asked for
ID (Diaz 182). The racism only continually worsens, with vulgar name calling and the throwing
of a soda can at Yunior.
After these racist actions take place, Yunior dates a Dominican woman in Boston who
denies and dismisses his claims of the city brimming with racism. When he mentions it, she
looks at [him] like [hes] crazy. Boston isnt racist, she says. She scoffs at the idea of racism in
Santo Domingo (Diaz 196). With this, readers see the setting up and disregard towards white
privilege. In describing the perpetrators of the racist acts, there is always a mention of the person
being white. The girlfriends character exemplifies the way that this issue is passed over without
another thought because it isnt believed to exist. This depicts the engrained nature of white
privilege in society because these acts are not acknowledged as racist actions. No one stops them
and allows the racism to perpetuate, giving way to the oppression of the community not
described as white.

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As shown from the breakdown of the literary components present in Junot Diazs book,
his wonderfully intricate stories illuminate layers of social issues, including the oppression of
women, the damage of stereotypes on a culture, the complexity of ethnic identity, the nonessential roots of ethnicity, and the oppressive nature of white privilege. He remarkably
comments on society through the eyes of a complex character that is in no way flat. He shows his
audience what his meaning of being a Dominican man is, how people create the image for them,
and how to fight the image and create a new one. He also depicts the difficulties of having
multiple identities and compromising between them. These nine woven short stories, despite
being non-linear, turn society and culture towards a mirror to point at the flaws in a subtle
manner.

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References
Diaz, Junot. This Is How You Lose Her. New York: Riverhead Books, 2012. Print.
Parker, Robert. Feminism. How to Interpret Literature: Critical Theory for Literary and
Cultural Studies. New York: Oxford Press, 2015. 148-184. Print.
Parker, Robert. Postcolonial and Race Studies. How to Interpret Literature: Critical Theory for
Literary and Cultural Studies. New York: Oxford Press, 2015. 285-329. Print.
Fassler, Joe. How Junot Diaz Wrote a Sexist Character, But Not a Sexist Book. The Atlantic.
The Atlantic. 11 Sept. 2012. Web. 23 March 2015.
Brizee, Allen and Tompkins, J. Case. Feminist Criticism 1960s-Present. The Purdue Owl.
Purdue U Writing Lab, 21 April 2010. Web. 23 March 2015.