Unit Theme: Precision Painting with Words

Objective: At the end of this writing unit, the 4th grade students will be able to write a creative
narrative using concrete words and phrases to depict a real or imagined experience.
Common Core
CCSS.ELA-LITERACY.W.4.3
Write narratives to develop real or imagined experiences or events using effective
technique, descriptive details, and clear event sequences.
o CCSS.ELA-LITERACY.W.4.3.D
Use concrete words and phrases and sensory details to convey experiences
and events precisely.
The Continuum of Literacy Learning, Grades 3-8 by Gay Su Pinnell & Irene C Fountas
Use a range of descriptive words to enhance the meaning.
Use memorable or vivid words.
Use strong verbs (hurled instead of threw) and nouns (matriarch instead of mother).
Show through language instead of telling.
General Materials
Mentor Texts
o The Night Gardener by Jonathan Auxier
o Fortunately the Milk by Neil Gaiman (Skottie Young, Illus.)
o Zathura by Chris Van Allsburg
Pencils
Writers Notebook
Graphic Organizer(s)
o My Razzle Dazzle Words
o Vague Vocab to Precise Prose
Word Choice Definition Poster
Rubric (Summative Assessment)
Checklist (Self-assessment)
Day 1
Topic: What is Word Choice?
Resources/Materials
o Word Choice Definition Poster
o My Razzle Dazzle Words sheet
o Mentor Texts (3)
Teacher Actions
o Provide overview of the unit
Learn about word choice
Differentiate between strong and weak words
Use mentor texts to explore and apply knowledge of strong words
Write our own narrative using strong words
o Lead the students in a discussion of word choice

Ask the students a series of questions pertaining to word choice: what is

word choice; why is it important to use strong words; how do we decide
what strong words are; and how can word choice influence a story?
o Introduce mentor texts for the week
Do a brief book about all three mentor texts: author, illustrator, general
plot progression, etc.
o Provide the first set of alternatives for My Razzle Dazzle Words sheet

Student Actions
o Actively participate in the word choice discussion.
o Ask questions about the mentor texts.
o Complete My Razzle Dazzle Words sheet in small groups, coming up with as
many stronger versions of the words across the top.
o As they read their independent books, before next session, they should begin
creating their own list of razzle dazzle words in their writers notebook.

Day 2
Topic: Strong vs. Weak Words
Resources
o My Razzle Dazzle Words (Completed)
o Vague Vocab to Precise Prose sheet
o Zathura by Chris Van Allsburg
o Word Choice Rubric
Teacher Actions
o Review Day 1s work
o Review My Razzle Dazzle Words Sheet
o Introduce Word Choice Rubric
o Read aloud Zathura by Chris Van Allsburg
Read the entire book through once.
o Think aloud about the word choice made in the story.
Highlight strong words in the first four text blocks (pg. 1-10)
Shouted, called, whined (p. 1)

 Beamed, poking, you little fungus (p. 3)

Evasive action (p. 5)
Holy smoke, rock the size of a refrigerator (p. 7)
Gazing, popped, buzzing (p. 9)
What made these words strong?
Introduce the word choice rubric for judging the strength of words
(rate the words on the pages and justify the rating)
o Think aloud about the connection between the words and the pictures
What is the relationship between the two?
Did one help the other?
What would happen to the story if there were no pictures?
o Facilitate small groups working through the rest of the story.
o Give Vague Words to Precise Prose worksheet to be completed as individuals.

Student Actions
o Listen to the read aloud and think aloud of the mentor text.
o Participate in small group analysis of the second half of the story
Find, list and rate words found in the text
o Complete the Vague Words to Precise Prose worksheet before the next session.
Challenge: Write test sentences for partners
o Continue writing razzle dazzle words in writers notebook.

Day 3
Topic: Word Choice Evaluation #1: Illustrated Novels
Resources
o Fortunately, The Milk by Neil Gaiman
o Word Choice Rubric
o Sticky Notes
Teacher Actions
o Read aloud pages 1-15 for the group
List word choices, or styles, that seem particularly strong or interesting

Mum (p. 2)
After she went away (p. 3)
Sort of like forks, only not as stabby (p. 6)
He had his no tea face (p. 6)
a glittery, shimmery beam of light (p. 11-12)
they were a bit green and rather globby and they looked very
grumpy indeed (p. 14)
Miserable (p. 15)
Emergency Exit do not open for any reason this means you (p. 15)
o Group Discussion
Review the word choices found in Zathura
How is this section different than Zathura?
Less dialog and more internal monologue (narration by a
character)
What is the connection between the pictures and the text in this book?
The pictures illustrate parts of the story, but not the entire thing
Are the words as strong? How could we make the words stronger, or more
interesting?
There isnt a lot of strong nouns or verbs in this section, but does it
match the writing style of the author?
How does the authors word choice help tell the story?
o Rate the words according to the Word Choice Rubric as a group
o Present writing challenge: What comes next?
The task is to write the next part of the story using strong words, but also
tapping into the authors style for the section we read
Student Actions
o Listen to the first part of the mentor text
o Write down strong/interesting words on sticky notes
o Participate in the group discussion about the mentor text, and how it relates to the
previous
o Brainstorm plot points that could happen after the beam of light comes down.
o Write a two paragraph narrative answering the question What comes next?
Paying close attention to word choices already made in the selection, but
also improvements
o Rate their word choice using the Word Choice Rubric

Day 4
Topic: Word Choice Evaluation #2: Novels
Resources
o Fortunately, The Milk by Neil Gaiman
o The Night Gardener by Jonathan Auxier
o Word Choice Rubric
Teacher Actions
o Read the next section of Fortunately, the Milk (p. 16-29)
o Facilitate a group discussion on their writing challenge

How did their narratives matchup: word choice, plot direction, authorship,
etc.
o Review progression made so far:
Picture book, illustrated novel, word choice, word improvement, etc.
o Group discussion question: What happens to the words when there are no
pictures?
They become more important; they have to paint a complete picture; etc.
o Review The Night Gardener by Jonathan Auxier
Book talk it briefly (review the basics)
Read aloud chapter 1 of the book.
Challenge students to draw what they see as the chapter is being read
A crisp sun shone over Cedar Hollow, melting the final bits of ice
from the bare trees (p. 3)
He propped himself against his crook, eyeing Molly from heel to
head the way that men sometimes did (p. 4)
The instrument had a crank at one end, and when she turned the
handle, deep notes come outlike if honeybees could sing (p. 6)
The manikin woman continued playing, her fingers darting along
the keys (p. 6-7)
She and her brother descended into a gorge, and behind them she
could hear the woman resume her singing (p. 11)

o Present writing challenge: Words to Pictures & What comes next?

Students should read Chapters 2-3 independently
After reading each chapter, or section, they should illustrate what the
words created in their mind (to the best of their ability)
They should also write another 2 paragraph narrative about what comes
after chapter 3.
Student Actions
o Listen to the second section of the mentor text
Note indicators of author style and word choice on sticky notes
o Participate in the group discussion of the previous writing challenge
Share their narrative
Answer questions and converse about the similarities and differences
among the group when compared to the author
o Discuss the connection between the lack of pictures and the word choices made
by an author
Rate some of the words using the Word Choice Rubric
How do they compare to the other texts that we have worked with?
o Complete the new writing challenge.
Should produce at least 2 pictures related to the word choice that is found
in chapters 2 and 3 of The Night Gardener.
Write a 2 paragraph narrative for what happens after the conclusion of
chapter 3.

Day 5
Topic: Pre-Writing Your Own Story
Resources
o Word Choice Rubric
o Teacher Example
o Mentor Texts
Teacher Actions
o Facilitate group discussion on their writing challenge
What mental images did they manage to get on paper?
What did they construct as narratives?
How did it match the authors style/word choice?
What rating did they give their words versus the authors?
o Discuss the final project: Creative narrative with/without pictures
Brainstorm: story ideas
Review Word Choice Rubric
Allow review of the mentor texts
Text to picture relationships
Text pictures vs. image pictures
Author style as word choice
o Present example piece
Illustrate writing process
Read aloud creative narrative
Rate word choice using rubric
o Facilitate small/individual work time
o Provide students with grading rubric for final narrative
Word Choice Rubric + Additional Criteria
Student Actions
o Share their writing challenge productions
o Brainstorm possible narrative ideas
Themes, characters, plot points, etc.
o Review all of their word work up until this point: razzle dazzle word lists, word
ratings, authors word choices, etc.
o Evaluate the teacher example of written material
o Begin working on creative narrative of their own
Day 6
Topic: Personal Word Choice: Final Project
Resources
o Narrative Rough Drafts
o Sticky Notes
o Mentor Texts
Teacher Actions
o Facilitate progress report sharing
How are the narratives? Progress?
What words are being chosen?
Pictures?

o Lead students through a peer review process

Swap stories and read them, make notes about word choices (ratings),
suggestions for edits, and general comments.
o Facilitate student writing time.
Student Actions
o Share progress report on narrative, answering the questions and sharing insights.
o Peer review another students paper
What did you like?
What could be improved on?
How are the word choices?
o Review comments, edit/finish narrative, and polish it for final presentation (Day
7-8)

Student Self-Assessment
Word Choice Rubric
Rating of 5 (Strong): The writing creates a mental picture for the reader. The writer uses
powerful action verbs, accurate adjectives, and precise nouns. The language is natural.
Powerful action verbs give the writing energy.
The adjectives are as descriptive and accurate as possible.
The nouns are specific, not general.
Slang and clichs are not used very much.
The language is natural and not overdone. Words are used correctly.
Rating of 3 (Developing): The language is functional, but it is difficult for the reader to get a
mental picture. The writer uses everyday language well, but may rely on clichs and slang. The
writer may repeat or misuse some words.
The writing gets the message across, but with language that doesn't really capture the
reader's imagination.
The writer may use slang and clichs, but not to the point that it bothers the reader.
The writer may misuse words, but the reader can usually figure out what was meant.
The writer seems to avoid using new words, but the paper may have one or two good
moments.
The paper may contain a few energetic verbs, accurate adjectives, and specific nouns.
Rating of 1 (Beginning): The writer's vocabulary is limited. The writer has a hard time finding
the right words to get his message across to the reader.
The language is not energetic, accurate, or precise. The message is difficult for the reader
to picture in his/her mind.
The writer relies on the same words and avoids using new words. Clichs and slang are
overused.
Words are incorrectly used, making it difficult for the reader to understand what the
writer meant.
Summative Assessment
Exceeds

Meets Standards

Almost Meets

Does Not Meet

Standards
4 pts
Wrote an original
Creativity
piece of narrative
(did not copy a
mentor text or
other reading
book)
Proper spelling
Spelling and
and grammar
Grammar
throughout.
Strong, vivid
Word Choice
words and
descriptions
throughout (4+
rating)
There is a strong
Fluidity
rhythm and flow
of language.
Sentence structure
is varied
throughout piece.
Organization and Organization and
use of 6+
Development
supporting details
evident in the
work.

3 pts

1-2 spelling or
grammar errors.

Standards
2 pts

3-4 spelling or
grammar errors.

Strong words and

descriptions
throughout (3-4
rating)

Standards
1 pts
Did not write an
original piece of
narrative (copied
other story or
piece of literature)
5+ spelling or
grammar errors.

Some strong
words and some
above average
word choices (2-3
rating)
There is a rhythm An obvious
and flow of
attempt to create a
language.
rhythm and flow.
Sentence structure Sentence structure
is often varied.
not varied.

Poor word choice

and descriptions
throughout..

Organization and
use of 4-5
supporting details
evident in the
work.

Poor organization
and no attempt to
supply supporting
details.

Attempted
organization and
use of 3-4
supporting details
evident in the
work.

No attempt to
create a rhythm.
Sentence structure
not varied.

Differentiation
Students who are advanced
o Genre/style specific writing
o Word Choice Rubric Standards to meet
% of word choice scores should be at 4 or higher.
o Incorporate characters and plot points from the mentor texts
A crossover narrative: Zathura meets The Night Gardener
o Answer the question, What happened before this? for a mentor text.
Students who need extra support
o Provide the students with story starters/writing prompts.
o Brainstorm plot points as a small group that could be incorporated
o Provide a pre-fabricated story board
Write the story according to the pictures
o Revisit What happens next? for one of the other mentor texts
Teacher Model

The Garden
Everybody has a place that they feel safe; a place where they can go when they dont
want to be found. For me, its the garden up the street. You see, people generally go to the
garden to inhale the essence of the flowers, to take a leisurely stroll on a Sunday afternoon, or to
sit on the ornate benches found around the fountain. Not me. I go there to escape. I go there to
hide out. I go there to be myself.
Where do you think youre going young man? Have you finished your chores? Is your
homework done?
Yes mom. I did all of my chores, even took out the garbage twice. Plus, I dont have any
homework, its summer vacation! Ill be back in a little while!
Sorry about that, thats just my mom. Shes kind of overprotective, like all the time, and
is always checking in on me. However, she doesnt pry for information, which is always nice. If
I told her where I was going, she would probably think something was wrong with me. I mean, a
young man hanging out in the community garden all day, rather than playing ball with the boys
down the street? Whats not to get about that? I like going to the garden, and I dont like the boys
down the street. Oh well, moms will be moms I suppose. Anyway, where were we?
Oh yes! So, this garden. To most people on my block its just another garden: lots of
flowers, a fountain, some benches, and the occasional bee. However, what they dont know is
that its a magical place. A place, where I can step through the barrier and enter into a realm of
existence where I dont have to worry anymore; where we can just sit in silence and be at peace.
Some people find this in music. Some people find this in books. For me its the garden.
Hey son, where you heading to today?
Oh, hey Mrs. Booth, Im just out for a walk, trying to enjoy my summer off!
Dont you want to go to the swimming pool with all the other kiddos? Its going to be a
scorcher today!
Im not really into swimming, but Ill probably find a way to stay cool anyway! Thanks
for the advice though!
Sometimes the old lady, she lives three houses down, yells at me from her porch swing.
She thinks all kids are the same, so we all need to do the same things. I often wonder if she was
ever a kid, of if she ever did things her friends didntits okay to be different.
Here we are. This is the entrance the garden that I always take. Its right between these
two bushes. I was walking around a while ago and noticed this path and decided that since I had
nothing better to do, I would check it out. Somebody had been there before, and it probably just
went to the other side of the bushes, right? Wrong. This was the path through the magical barrier
that surrounds the garden. I quickly discovered that it disallows any sort of worry, hate, or other
worldly concerns to be brought in. When I stepped into a garden, my worries were wiped clean.
My concerns from the day withered and died. It was a peaceful place where negative energy was
not allowed to dwell. This was my new sanctuary, and nobody else knew.
The End!
Writing Process Reflection
When I try to write, I often find it really hard to merely get started. There is this innate
fear that it isnt going to be good, or nobody is going to like it, which is not the point of writing
in the first place. I feel as if being trained to write academically truly stifles the creative mind
that we are, seemingly, born with. As I sit down and try to write something, just off the cuff, I sit
and think about the form and function of the piece rather than allow it come out. The short

narrative about a garden, above, took me 20 minutes to construct because I kept stopping to think
about what should come next. This is how it is with all of my writings, and it is really frustrating
and disappointing.
With this in mind, I feel as if it is important to train students to think in bi-lateral ways:
creatively and academically, when writing at least. We need to train them how to write solid
papers for school, but also assist them in fostering the creative juices that allows them to write
out random stories on a whim, or create characters for games in an instant. These stem from two
different parts of the brain, and if we dont develop both of them they may lose a certain spark
that is naturally occurring in them. This is what I want back, I want the creative spark that allows
me to come up with outlandish story arcs and not care about who likes it or not. I want to be able
to free write and be okay with that. So, really the writing process for me is laborious and,
generally, really frustrating, which can pose a problem when trying to show the students the joy
of writing and honing the ability to do so regularly.