DRAFT GOVERNMENTAL MEMORANDUM:

TO BE USED IN THE EVENT OF MAJOR CLIMATE CATASTROPHE:

Office of the President
Washington, DC
We in the ________ administration have heard the peoples cries for solutions to
avert further damage and displacement brought about by ongoing global climate
change, and announce today a bold initiative beginning July x, 20xx, which is to
systematically phase out all carbon emitting power generation within the next 25
years, and to pursue an aggressive ramp-up of non-carbon emitting energy sources
over the same span of time.

DR

AF
T

Given the costs involved with decommissioning so many power sources, and with
retraining displaced workers, the administration estimates a 10 fold increase in
solar, wind and geothermal generation along with a doubling of nuclear and
hydroelectric power sources represents the outer limit of attainable construction
using current low-emissions technologies. These goals, along with the addition of
50 gigawatts of capacity from sources currently under development in our
countrys research labs, will allow the United States to replace approximately half
of its present energy needs with completely renewable resources. The remaining
deficit will need to be made up via conservation efforts undertaken by citizens and
private industry.
So as to simplify the transition into this world-leading non-carbon society, a lottery
will be instituted to shutter two-thirds of all residential and non-industrial real
estate. Neighbors will be instructed to cohabitate within the remaining structures
such that a minimum of 165 sq ft of living space will be guaranteed to each
resident. Power consumption will be monitored within each of the remaining
structures, to ensure that the consolidated residence does not consume more energy
than it did prior to consolidation. Inhabitants will need to undertake a significant
personal power diet in order to achieve the necessary reductions in required
energy. The number of automobiles allowed within each neighborhood will
likewise be reduced through a two-thirds lottery, and as the remaining cars and
light trucks require replacement, all new vehicles must be 100% electric in
propulsion. Ride sharing will become mandatory. Each vehicle will be registered
with a central database incorporating a dynamic need management algorithm so
that automobile usage will be distributed equitably across the population.

AF
T

Non-industrial businesses (retailers, professional offices, restaurants etc.) will

likewise pass through a lottery consolidation similar to residential neighborhoods.
The remaining business sites will be shared in a cooperative fashion by all those in
need of work space. Again, total power consumption for agglomerated activities
may not rise above the original requirements of the one remaining building. A
careful evaluation and consolidation of energy usage will be required throughout
the economy.
Incidentally, the two-thirds benchmark has been established so as to provide an
additional margin of power availability for crucial services and to maintain the jobs
and capacities of our remaining industrial base.

DR

Industrial businesses, governmental agencies, healthcare facilities, schools and the

like will be exempted from the two-thirds lottery so as to maintain public order and
to continue to provide jobs and social support throughout this significant societal
transition. Nevertheless, exempted businesses will be expected to institute energy
reduction plans of approximately 25%.
Please note that since renewable power sources require significant land area upon
which to be built and to operate, it is not possible to expand the renewable base.
Once the transition has completed, an indefinite moratorium will be placed on
power demand growth until replacement renewable technologies with higher
power densities become available. Additional power will be allotted via a priority
list compiled by an independent, blue ribbon panel.
Our fight against climate change will secure a great victory for this nation. Let us
hope that all nations embrace our example and with us commit to the enormous
task of wiping out carbon emissions so that we may all stabilize and then reverse
the impact of human generated global warming.

Note: The above document is satirical in nature. The author may be reached on Twitter via @GonePlaces.