TOEFL ESSAY UNIT -- Lesson One -- Basic 5 Paragraph Essay

1. Getting started means getting organized:

Analyze the assignment; determine what is required.

o Find the TOPIC and the TASK (and subtopics)
Underline key words in the question
Brainstorm synonyms for those key words
Do some brainstorming, clustering, writing lists, or free-writing

Sample Question:
You have a present that was really memorable. It could have been given for an important occasion or
just for no reason at all. Tell us about the present and why it was memorable. Include the reason it was
given, a description of it, and how you felt when you got it.
The objective is to write a narrative essay about a present you were given
The TOPIC is a memorable present
The TASK is to tell about the present, why it was memorable
The three main subtopics are:
the reason it was given
a description of it
and how you felt when you got it
(NOTE: the subtopics are not always listed)
Outline your five paragraph essay; including introduction, body and closing:
2. Introductory Paragraph
introduce the general topic in two sentences: memorable present
end introduction with a strong thesis statement that hints at your three main subtopics:
1.
2.
3.

Subtopic One: the reason it was given

Subtopic Two: a description of it
Subtopic Three: how you felt when you got it

3. Body of the Essay

First Supporting Paragraph

Second Supporting Paragraph

Third Supporting Paragraph

Restate Subtopic One

Restate Subtopic Two

Restate Subtopic Three

Supporting Details or Examples

Supporting Details or Examples

Supporting Details or Examples

Transition

Transition

Transition

Closing or Summary Paragraph

Synthesis and conclusion of the thesis
rephrasing main topic and subtopics.

4. Tips for writing a short essay

ORGANIZATION is key. Use a mind map, or brainstorming to find the main ideas, then put
them in a logical order in an outline.
o You will not have time to make a draft copy, so follow your outline as you write
Write in the active voice
o It is much more powerful.
o Unless you are writing a personal narrative, do not use the pronoun "I."
Varying sentence structure
o Review to avoid the same dull pattern of always starting with the subject of the
sentence. Avoid repetitious pronouns and lists
o Avoid beginning sentences the same way (subject + verb + direct object).
Brainstorm to find the best supporting ideas
o The best supporting ideas are the ones about which you have some knowledge. If you
do not know about them, you cannot do a good job writing about them.
o Don't weaken the essay with ineffective argument.
o Supporting ideas, examples, details must be specific to the sub-topic

Writing the Introduction

1st first sentence, introduce the general topic
2nd sentence, narrow the topic to focus more on the question
3rd sentence, restate the question in your own words, in statement form
Write a concluding sentence that indicates the controlling idea of the essay.
o This is the thesis statement.
o This is a one sentence answer to the essay question that gives your point of view.
Keep the introduction simple. Focus your TIME on writing good supporting paragraphs
The Thesis Statement
Use one of these phrases to focus your essay. You thesis statement includes the main idea of the essay
and a controlling idea or YOUR POINT OF VIEW.
o the reasons for
o the different parts / kinds / types
o the causes of
of
o the characteristics / traits /
o the effects of
qualities of
o the procedure for
o
the problems of
o the advantages of
o the precautions for
o the disadavantages of
o the changes to
o the ways / methods of
NOTE: your thesis statement must answer the essay question. If you write a
brilliant essay that does NOT answer the essay question, you may not get credit for
your essay.
The thesis statement should provide a road map to your essay.
It organizes your thoughts so that you can quickly write a logical answer to the
essay question.
The thesis statement should be supported by the ideas you generated in your
mind map
2

Improving the Introduction

An introduction can sometimes be improved by adding a definition. Usually between
the opening first and second sentence, and the thesis statement.
How to define a term:
1. state the word or phrase to be defined
2. give the category that the word or phrase fits into
3. tell how the word is different from other words that fit the same category
A person who is diligent works hard in a very careful and steady way.
Supporting Paragraphs
The body of your essay should have two or three paragraphs
3 5- 5- 5- 3 OR 3 7 -7 -7 3
Use your mind map to find the sub topics that support your thesis statement
o If you sub topics do not support your thesis statement, change your
thesis statement or do more brainstorming.
Write a topic sentence for each of your two or three main points
o Each topic sentence should relate to the thesis statement at the end of
your introduction
o Each topic sentence should provide support for your thesis statement
o The topic sentence for each paragraph tells the reader what the paragraph
is about.
o Each sentence in that paragraph should relate to the topic sentence.
o Remember topic sentences have a main idea + controlling idea
Supporting sentences in your paragraphs
o The topic sentence should be supported by two or three main arguments
o Each argument should be backed up by details, facts and examples
End the paragraph in a concluding sentence that
o refers back to the topic sentence
o provides a transition to the next paragraph
Write a transition to establish the sub-topic
o Each paragraph has to flow, one to the next.
o Make sure you use the right transition, see list
o Sometimes you use a synonym for a key word to provide unity without
repetition
Strengthen supporting paragraphs by adding details
As you write, ask yourself Why? In what way? How? What kind? How
long?
The answers to these questions add interesting details and support to
your paragraphs
Here's what you need to have in a body paragraph. (Example: Is education being
devalued?)
Topic Sentence

People have several arguments against the need for degrees.

Argument or Reason 1

They say that having so many graduates devalues a degree.

Example, Explanation, or supporting detail

People lose respect for the degree holder.

Argument or Reason 2

It is also claimed that education has become a rat race,...

Example, Explanation, or supporting detail

...since graduates have to compete for jobs even after years

of studying.

Argument or Reason 3

Another point is that studying for such a long time leads to

learners becoming inflexible.

Example, Explanation, or supporting detail

By that I mean that they know a lot about one narrow

subject, but are unable to apply their skills.

Example, Explanation, or supporting detail (You can have

one, two, or even more of these for every idea)

Employers, on the other hand, prefer more flexible and

adaptable workers.

Concluding sentence / transition to next paragraph (may be

in topic sentence of next paragraph)

http://www.writefix.com/argument/body2.htm
The Conclusion or Summary Paragraph
A good conclusion will
rephrase the question
summarize the main ideas
o The conclusion should leave your reader with no doubt as to your
position or conclusion of logic
o You can do this by paraphrasing the topic sentences of your body
paragraphs
give your opinion, if you haven't given it already,
look to the future (say what will happen if the situation continues or changes)
o make a prediction or give a solution
NEVER add new information
http://www.writefix.com/argument/conclusions2.htm

Technical details

Edit and revise your essay -- if you can

Check your spelling and grammar
Subjects and verbs agree, and verb tenses are consistent
Examine your whole essay for logic
Thought builds and flows?
Avoid gaps in logic, or too much detail.
Review individual sentences
o Use active verbs to be more descriptive
Avoid passive constructions and the verb "to be"
Use transitional words and phrases
Avoid sentences beginning with pronouns, constructions as "There are....,"
o Example: "There is a need to proofread all works" becomes
"Proofreading is a must."
4

Be concise -- though vary the length and structure of sentences

Adapted and revised with permission from: Kasper, J. The Five Paragraph Essay, 14 January, 1999,
http://www.geocities.com/SoHo/Atrium/1437/eval.html (9 June 2001) http://www.studygs.net/5paragraph_edit.htm

Editing Checklist

Is there an introductory paragraph?

Does the introduction restate the question?
Does the introduction narrow the general topic to a specific topic?
Does the introduction have a thesis statement with a controlling idea?
Does each body paragraph have a topic sentence?
Do the topic sentences of the paragraphs support the thesis statement?
Do the ideas in each paragraph support its topic sentence?
Does each paragraph include details or examples to support the topic sentence?
Is there a concluding paragraph? Does it echo the introduction?
Does the essay answer ALL parts of the question?
Is the essay cohesive? (unified, on topic, with transitions?)
Are the sentences concise?
Did you check spelling and verb tenses and subject-verb agreement?

From Gear, J. & Gear, R. (2006) Cambridge Preparation for the TOEFL Test 4th ed.