Devotional 12 in 12

Finding Our Way Back to God – a Daily Recovery Devotional
1
Visit us online
www.NorthStarCommunity.com ®

Join us
Sundays at 10:45 a.m. Bon Air Elementary School

8701 Polk Street, Richmond, Virginia 23235
Saturdays at 6:30 p.m. Bon Air Baptist Church

2531 Buford Road, Richmond, Virginia 23235
Contact us
2531 Buford Road, Richmond, VA 23235
Information@NorthStarCommunity.com
800-908-2377
Watch us Sundays at 11:30 a.m.

a televised service on CBS Channel 6, Richmond, Virginia
MECHANICSVILLE LOCATION
Sundays 10:30 a.m. Walnut Grove in Mechanicsville
7046 Cold Harbor Road, Mechanicsville, Virginia
804-746-5081

2
STEP 1 We admitted that we were powerless over What are some of your symptoms that show you
our dependencies—that our lives had become that you, like me, are not able to be like God—
unmanageable. perfect and blameless? Please also realize that
there’s nothing inherently evil about a handful of
January 1 tasty treats – that’s perfectionistic thinking).

Scripture reading for today: Genesis 1, 2, and 3 Thought for today: Adam and Eve had a fresh‐start
experience that failed too. They were created by
I have great plans for the New Year. I want to be God himself (they had no parental units to blame for
the “new” me! I plan on eating well, exercising, their major lapse in judgment). They had only one
doing my daily devotionals without fail, being kind to instruction for what not to do (“do not eat from the
others, and even keeping a tidy house in my spare tree of the knowledge of good and evil”), and yet
time. I can’t wait to see how I’m going to turn out in they failed. They were powerless over their desire to
the new year with all these resolutions for “right be like God (which is distinctly different from
living.” But there’s one little problem ‐ on day one I desiring to imitate God by following His voice and
blew it! My husband, Pete, and I were heading home stepping as He speaks), and their lives became an
from a quick, 24‐hour beach trip with dear friends. unmanageable mess. One of their kids became a
So far, I had been practically perfect—healthy murderer, and another son was a victim at his
breakfast and lunch, a leisurely quiet time, a brisk brother’s hand. God meted out consequences, one
walk—my year was turning out as planned. But of which resulted in them losing their home. Does
around 4:00 in the afternoon, when we were this sound familiar? Do you know anyone who is also
heading home in the car, my beloved spouse opened suffering like this today? Think about it ‐ a man and
a gigantic bag of M&M’s. And like Eve and her nasty woman, fresh from the very hands of Creator God.
fruit‐tasting incident, I succumbed to temptation and Two people who strolled with God himself in the
ate from that bag of tempting chocolate. Now my evening and were given the ultimate position of
year is ruined. On the first day, I failed to be perfect. power on earth. They had a marriage literally made
How am I going to get to be the “new” me if I keep in heaven, and they blew it. They had it all, and it
living like the “old” me? My best‐laid plans stretched wasn’t enough. Why, then, do we expect a different
out before me—all my potential and promise thrown experience? So for today, let’s acknowledge our
away—from a handful (or 2 or 3 or 4) of M&M’s! powerlessness and our unmanageable lives. Tune in
How long will it take you to join me in the pursuit tomorrow to see why this is such great news!
of powerless living? I admit it – I am powerless in the
face of my potential for perfection. No amount of Thought for tomorrow: There’s nobody living right,
positive thinking, practicing healthy habits, and not even one, nobody who knows the score, nobody
prayer seems to be enough to keep me from falling alert for God. They’ve all taken the wrong turn;
prey to living in ways that leave me disappointed in they’ve all wandered down blind alleys. No one’s
myself. living right; I can’t find a single one. Their throats are
It’s true. I do not have the power to live life to my gaping graves, their tongues slick as mud slides.
exacting standards (note the emphasis on MY). Even Every word they speak is tinged with poison. They
on the first day of a fresh new year, my life is not open their mouths and pollute the air. They race for
working for me. As a believer, I admit that I do not the honor of sinner‐of‐the‐year, litter the land with
have the power to live life as God intends. Surely you heartbreak and ruin, don’t know the first thing about
know these feelings have nothing to do with a few living with others. They never give God the time of
M&M’s. You get that, right? Despite numerous day. This makes it clear, doesn’t it, that whatever is
strategies and renewed efforts, most of us reach a written in these Scriptures is not what God says
moment in time when we realize that our attempts about others but to us to whom these Scriptures
at perfection, control, and sustainable life were addressed in the first place! And it’s clear
satisfaction have failed. The M&M’s are a enough, isn’t it, that we’re sinners, every one of us,
symptom—not the cause. (Take a moment to reflect: in the same sinking boat with everybody else? Our
3
involvement with God’s revelation doesn’t put us religious reasons, or simply because we can’t figure
right with God. What it does is force us to face our out how to leave, we feel pretty powerless. I know
complicity in everyone else’s sin. But in our time folks who feel absolutely powerless as they watch a
something new has been added. What Moses and dreaded disease overtake a loved one. That’s a
the prophets witnessed to all those years has pretty powerless situation too. There are many
happened. The God‐setting‐things‐right that we read different ways to experience powerlessness.
about has become Jesus‐setting‐things‐right for us. But it’s not all bad news.
And not only for us, but for everyone who believes in
him. For there is no difference between us and them Thought for today: Hagar is a great example for all
in this. Since we’ve compiled this long and sorry kinds of powerless living. As a servant with very few
record as sinners (both us and them) and proved choices, she is enlisted to act as a surrogate for
that we are utterly incapable of living the glorious Abraham’s lineage. Abraham’s wife, Sarah, grew
lives God wills for us, God did it for us. Out of sheer impatient waiting for God’s promise of a son, and
generosity he put us in right standing with himself. A she cast Hagar into the role of baby‐maker with
pure gift. He got us out of the mess we’re in and Abraham. When Hagar became pregnant, she
restored us to where he always wanted us to be. suffered under the illusion that now she had some
And he did it by means of Jesus Christ. What we’ve power. Boy, was she wrong. Read the whole story to
learned is this: God does not respond to what we do; get a grip on all the sordid details. The bottom line is
we respond to what God does. We’ve finally figured that Hagar was indeed powerless. In fact, her
it out. Our lives get in step with God and all others pregnancy increased her lack of power and level of
by letting him set the pace, not by proudly or unmanageability. But here’s the hope: Once Hagar
anxiously trying to run the parade. Romans 3, acknowledged her powerless state, an angel of the
selected verses from The Message Lord came to her. He gave her words of
encouragement. Hagar, a servant, one of the lowliest
January 2 of the low in her society, had an intimate encounter
with God. Hagar understood what many of us miss:
Scripture reading for today: Genesis 16 ‐ 21 God hears us when we cry out to Him. And he
responds. He gave Hagar wise counsel, and she
Yesterday we looked at the kind of powerlessness followed his advice. Abraham didn’t exactly rush to
that grips us from the inside out. It’s the place in our Hagar and Ishmael’s aid when Sarah began to resent
heart where our desire to be healthy and fit collides them. Sarah never seemed to grasp that all this
with our inner couch potato and junk‐food junkie. chaos was the result of her own attempts to exert
Why is it that the potato and junkie always seem to power in a situation that God already had a hand in.
win? That’s one kind of powerlessness. But there’s Life stayed messy for this “blended” family. But the
another. thing to remember is this: God heard the cries of
This is the kind of powerlessness that comes when those who knew they were without power. I hope
our life circumstances appear to place us in a this comforts you today. I hope this helps you
position of limited choices. We wish we had other muster up the courage to admit all the powerless
options, but it seems as if circumstances beyond our and unmanageable parts of your life to the One who
control dictate our lives. I know a lady who feels like hears.
she has no choice but to continue to give money to
her drug‐addicted son. Her support group tells her Thought for tomorrow: My people are broken –
this is codependent, enabling behavior. But she has shattered! – and they put on band‐aids, saying, “It’s
grandchildren that need shoes! Those babies need to not so bad. You’ll be just fine.” But things are not
eat! She hears what her friends and family suggest. “just fine”! Jeremiah 6:14 The Message
She wishes she could follow their sound advice.
What about those babies? This is God’s word on the subject: …“I’ll show up and
When we have an abusive spouse but feel take care of you as I promised and bring you back
compelled to stay for the children’s sake, or for home. I know what I’m doing. I have it all planned
4
out – plans to take care of you, not abandon you, us powerless; our lives become unmanageable.
plans to give you the future you hope for. When you Research is revealing that even our personalities are
call on me, when you come and pray to me, I’ll shaped by our DNA. We’re learning that our
listen.” Jeremiah 29:10‐12 The Message environment and family systems may even alter our
chromosomes! How weird is that? Does that leave
January 3 you breathless? Do you look back into your family
tree and tremble with dread? No need for all this
Scripture reading for today: Genesis 22 – 25 fear! If we can acknowledge our powerlessness
potential, it puts us in a perfect position to accept
Have you experienced any post‐holiday blues, God’s generous response and saving grace. We’ll
specifically the “jeans” blues? We’ve had the look at more about that good news tomorrow.
Thanksgiving‐through‐Christmas binging, and now
our favorite jeans are snug. Don’t you hate that? Thought for tomorrow: Through your faithful
There’s another kind of blues too—the “genes” prayers and the generous response of the Spirit of
blues. We’re living during such an interesting time in Jesus Christ, everything he wants to do in and
history. Crime‐solving television shows like CSI have through me will be done. Philippians 1:19 The
taught us that we can learn a lot just by studying the Message
DNA unwittingly left at crime scenes. Cloning and
genetic testing give us windows into information January 4
that no one could have dreamed of possessing a few
years ago. Scripture reading for today: Genesis 26 – 29
My brother’s kids were out playing in their
driveway and someone got hurt. Blood was shed. My Through your faithful prayers and the generous
nephew, Robby, a little tyke at the time, came response of the Spirit of Jesus Christ, everything he
running in the house shouting, “Dad, dad, come wants to do in and through me will be done.
quick. There’s DNA all over our driveway!” That’s a Philippians 1:19 The Message
far different perspective from when we were kids
and would get injured. We’d yell things like, “Mom, Philippians was written by Paul. I’d recommend
Tim threw a dart and hit Gary between the eyes! that you take a moment and read the first chapter in
Blood is everywhere! I bet Tim’s in big trouble!” this little book of the New Testament. You’ll recall
With or without genetic testing, our genes have that Paul, a devout Jew and Roman citizen (a lot of
been supplying us with the potential for interesting implications packaged in those two
powerlessness for a long, long time. Recall the story truths) once lived for the purpose of persecuting
of Hagar and her son Ishmael. Ishmael was the son Christians. He thought this was, as we say at
conceived when Sarah gave Hagar (her servant) to NorthStar Community, “a God thing.” Then he had
Abraham (Sarah’s husband) so that a child might be an amazing conversion experience (you can read
conceived. Not surprisingly, barren Sarah gets pretty about that in the book of Acts) and became a
tensed up when Hagar gets pregnant. Hagar starts missionary and itinerant pastor.
getting cocky with Sarah. Abraham is now stuck with The man suffered for the cause. When he wrote
an angry wife and a servant carrying his son. God Philippians, he was facing trial in Rome. Depending
steps in to provide for Hagar, Ishmael, Sarah, and on the outcome, execution was a distinct possibility.
Abraham. But the seeds of anger and resentment Paul, who experienced a wide range of plenty and
have been sown, and they show up in the genes. poverty, health and hardship, knew about
Genesis 25:12‐18 gives us a glimpse into the DNA unmanageability and powerlessness firsthand. It is
of Ishmael and his descendents, “And they lived in from this kind of man that we can learn how to
hostility toward all their brothers.” hope.
The Greek word that Paul uses in this passage has
Thought for today: Like Ishmael, we have some been translated “generous response.” In other
genetic predispositions too. These inclinations leave translations, “supply” and “help given” are among
5
the words chosen. It’s an interesting word.
According to Rick Renner’s book Sparkling Gems Thought for tomorrow: I know that nothing good
from the Greek, (see January 2), the ancient word lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature. For I have the
literally means, “on behalf of the choir.” Huh? It desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out.
helps to have Renner’s historical perspective. For what I do is not the good I want to do; no, the
According to his research, this word (used only twice evil I do not want to do – this I keep on doing. Now if
in scripture) came from a story of a miraculous I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do
supply. It seems that thousands of years ago, a huge it, but it is sin living in me that does it. Romans 7:18‐
choral and dramatic group worked endlessly to 20 NIV
create a huge production in ancient Greece.
Unfortunately, right before they were scheduled to …everything he (Jesus) wants to do in and through
put the show on the road, they ran out of money. me will be done. Philippians 1:19(b) The Message
Fortunately, a wealthy benefactor came forward and
“supplied/gave help/responded generously”—so January 5
much so that the contribution was considered
overwhelming. The show went on. Scripture reading for today: Genesis 30 ‐ 31
He makes two points in this study: 1. The actors
had given their all and were completely powerless, “To me Step One is not just a step ‘to take’ and
without a single, solitary resource of any kind. 2. The then leave it behind and go on. Step One is a
response of the benefactor was way over the top— growing awareness of one’s condition, and it should
excessively large—illogically generous. be thought about, and the realization deepened
So when our monsters within raise their ugly every day.” 1
heads and we feel powerless over our compulsions,
when our circumstances seem beyond enduring and Abraham eventually had a son by Sarah, and they
we believe we are without any healthy choices, and named him Isaac. Isaac had twin boys, Jacob and
even when our genetic history is questionable, we Esau. Jacob in particular carried on one of the multi‐
can know this: the Spirit that Jesus Christ is donating generational patterns of sin: deception. Jacob was a
for our present cause is greater than all these tricky trickster, and he used his clever ways to usurp
limitations. So, as the sign over my desk reads, “Put Esau (the official firstborn) of his birthright. It’s a
your big girl (or boy) panties on and just deal with long story, with lots of good family systems stuff,
it.” and I really want to retell it—but I won’t—so go read
No more excuses. No more power plays. Let’s just it!
admit our powerless state, join that ancient choir in Anyway, after all the trickery, Jacob high‐tailed it
realizing our helplessness, and ask God to do what out of town and ended up working for a man named
He does best: provide generously for the helpless, Laban. Jacob fell madly in love with one of his
the hopeless, and the oppressed. daughters, Rachel. In a twist of irony, Laban tricked
Jacob into working for him for seven years with the
Thought for today: One of the things that strikes me promise that Rachel would be his bride, but instead
every year when I read through Genesis is the gave him his older daughter, Leah. Then Jacob had to
repetition of family sin. The sins of the fathers tend work an additional seven years to finally marry
to show up in their children. The notable exceptions Rachel. (This story is soap‐opera material!)
seem too few and far between for me to be too Finally, Jacob comes to a “step one” moment in his
comfortable with my own baggage. It seems that the life. He becomes aware of his condition. Jacob
only thing I have to offer as an antidote to multi‐ responds to this growing awareness by becoming
generational sin patterns is willingness—willingness
to tell the truth about my own predispositions,
willingness to be made willing, willingness to always 1
The Twelve Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous, Some Personal
say earnestly, “I could be wrong.” Join me, won’t Comments by Father Martin, Father Joseph C. Martin, Kelly
you? Productions, Inc. 530 S. Philadelphia Blvd., Aberdeen, MD 21001-
3498
6
more cagey in his dealings with Laban. Eventually, all I love knowing that God’s provisions for me are not
this manipulation results in Jacob gaining enough dependent on my perfect behavior.
wealth that he feels free to take both wives and flee
Laban’s control. Confrontation is inevitable. Read January 6
Jacob’s response to Laban’s attempt to re‐exert
domination: Scripture reading for today: Genesis 32 ‐ 36

“What is my crime? What sin have I committed that Have you participated in a family feud? That can
you hunt me down? I have been with you for twenty be nasty stuff. The incident with Jacob and Esau
years now. Your sheep and goats have not makes the rest of us family feuders look like
miscarried, nor have I eaten rams from your flocks. I amateurs. In the scripture reading today, you’ll have
did not bring you animals torn by wild beats; I bore an opportunity to study their reconciliation. Notice
the loss myself. And you demanded payment from Jacob. He continues to cleverly manipulate those
me for whatever was stolen by day or night. This was around him. He sends his servants, wives, and
my situation: The heat consumed me in the daytime children ahead of him. Were they his human shields?
and the cold at night, and sleep fled from my eyes. It What was he thinking? Did he decide that if Esau
was like this for the twenty years I was in your came out swinging, the terrified cries of his family
household. I worked for you fourteen years for your would give him ample warning and he could flee?
two daughters and six years for your flocks, and you What else did Jacob think about on his long and
changed my wages ten times.” Genesis 31:36‐41 dusty ride home? Certainly he worried about Esau’s
response. But did he also remember his mom’s
Jacob was seriously in touch with his situation. home cooking? When he couldn’t sleep at night, did
How about you? Are you fully in touch with the he toss and turn in his tent, remembering the days
areas in your life that render you powerless and of childhood? Did flashes of fun times with Esau pass
leave your life an unmanageable mess? through his memory? As he traveled with his own
children, did he remember the times when Isaac first
Thought for today: As you continue reading, and if taught him how to ride a camel, or find water in the
you give this passage a lot of thought, you’ll desert?
probably notice that Jacob wasn’t exactly coming Our memories are quite selective. In the midst of
clean. He didn’t mention that his own efforts at feuding, loved ones become the enemy. We stew
manipulation cleverly increased his personal wealth. and stew, remembering their offenses against us.
So even Jacob had some more work to do on step The pressure builds. Our resentments increase. Our
one. This is good news for us. We don’t have to have plans for revenge take shape. Forgotten are all the
it all together to successfully take our first step. Let’s memories of better times. People who once
just begin where we are able, and see how God will enriched our lives become caricatures, stick figures,
lead! one‐dimensional beings—shadows of their true
selves. We pick out the things that we can attack,
Thought for tomorrow: One really cool part of this and off we go. We rally our defenses and mount our
story is Jacob’s awareness of God’s place in the high horses. Yes, our memories are quite selective.
story. He believes that without God’s intervention, It has been my experience that most people who
Laban’s manipulations would have worked. seriously need a step one experience have a history
of broken relationships. I’m not talking about the
“If the God of my father, the God of Abraham and normal tiffs and arguments that are inevitable; they
the Fear of Isaac, had not stuck with me, you would flare up and quickly die out, never to be
have sent me off penniless. But God saw the fix I was remembered again. I’m talking about painful,
in and how hard I had worked and last night unresolved, abundant‐life‐threatening, family‐
rendered his verdict.” Genesis 31:42 The Message dividing, feuds. I’m talking about the chronic
brokenness that results in people sitting at home,
driving down the road, watching TV, working out—
7
and constantly remembering the offenses of others world. There’s nothing enlightened about shrinking
perpetrated against them. How many years did so that other people won’t feel insecure around you.
Jacob and Esau think of each other in this way before We were born to manifest the glory of God that is
the embers of their rage grew cold? How long has it within us…And as we let our own light shine, we
been for you, that you’ve stewed in the anger of a unconsciously give other people permission to do the
busted relationship? same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our
Step one may be the first step in healing the pain presence automatically liberates others. (Nelson
of betrayal. It is acknowledging our powerless state Mandela)
in our damaged relationships. It’s taking a good,
hard look at the consequences and unmanageability January 7
that have resulted in our inability to play well with
others. Scripture reading for today: Genesis 37 – 38
It’s an opportunity to begin to remember more
than just the pain. This is the account of Jacob and his family. When
Joseph was seventeen years old, he often tended his
Thought for today: For this reason, I [Paul] remind father’s flocks. He worked for his half brothers, the
you [Timothy], to fan into flame the gift of God which sons of his father’s wives Bilhah and Zilpah. But
is in you. 2 Timothy 1:6 NIV Joseph reported to his father some of the bad things
his brothers were doing. Jacob loved Joseph more
“Remind you” literally means to re‐gather, to than any of his other children because Joseph had
recollect memories, to be reminded of something been born to him in his old age. So one day Jacob
repetitively. It’s normal to obsess over wrongdoing. had a special gift made for Joseph – a beautiful robe.
Everyone does it. But if we want the abundant life But his brothers hated Joseph because their father
that Jesus says he came to provide for us, it’s not loved him more than the rest of them. They couldn’t
good enough to just do what everyone else does. If say a kind word to him. Genesis 37:2‐4 New Living
we want to live God’s big dreams for us, we’ve got to Translation
be willing to learn how to see life through His eyes.
Creator God, the one who knows us best (after all, If a family wants to experience unmanageability,
He made us), encourages us to remember more than Jacob sets before us an excellent model. Favoritism
just today’s hardships and petty grievances. He tells in families is terrible. As you continue to read
us that he wants us to remember the gift of God through Genesis, you will discover that Joseph’s
which is in you. The gift of God is in you. God has brothers did a terrible thing to him. They caused a
planted something in you that he wants to fan into lot of grief to fall upon their family. But in all the
flames. Not flames of hot anger and burning excitement surrounding sibling violence, let’s not
resentment, but a flame that lights our world—a overlook this point: Jacob screwed up. There is no
flame that makes a difference. This kind of flame excuse for favoritism. Never.
serves a purpose, and it is a good one. No—it’s a I wonder if your family might be suffering some
great one. It is a purpose that is custom made by damaging consequences from favoritism. I wonder if
God himself and hand delivered, planted in your you have ever shown favoritism. (Think about this—
heart. It is my prayer that each of us will begin to what we see modeled, we usually repeat.)
change what we’re remembering. One of the reasons I love reading scripture is
because it is so real. Since scripture is God‐breathed
Thought for tomorrow: Our deepest fear is not that and inspired by Him, I realize that this was a choice
we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are on God’s part. How many books have you ever read
powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our like this? God tells it like it is, but with love. In
darkness, that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, communicating the stories of a litany of men and
“Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and women who loved Him, he didn’t edit out the messy
fabulous?” Actually, who are you not to be? You are parts. He named them. David was a man after God’s
a child of God. Your playing small doesn’t serve the own heart, but he was also an adulterer and
8
murderer. Jacob was a tricky trickster who showed again. A mother wants her children to learn from
favoritism to his son, to the detriment of his family. their mistakes. Learning from a mistake begins with
God used all this pain and ultimately brought about admitting that we made one. Hear this: God knows
reconciliation and even provision for this hurting we are going to mess up. I have come to believe that
family. I love how He does that. He is less desirous of perfection than He is humility.
He can do that for your family too. He can. But you May today be a day when you rejoice as you freely
must be willing to ask. You must be willing to admit your powerlessness in some area of your life.
acknowledge the pain. You must be willing to tell the Trust me. You will be amazed at how taking the first
truth about how powerless you and your family have step now may ultimately lead to a future where you
been over the multi‐generational patterns of sin that actually are transformed and make fewer errors of
continue to course through your veins. I pray that judgment.
today you will ask the Lord, “Is there anything in my
life that causes You grief?” And when He answers, Thought for tomorrow: My dishonesty made me
agree with Him. miserable and filled my days with frustration. My
strength evaporated like water on a sunny day until I
Thought for today: And do not bring sorrow to finally admitted all my sins to you and stopped trying
God’s Holy Spirit by the way you live. Ephesians 4:30 to hide them. Psalm 32:3‐5 The Living Bible
New Living Translation
January 8
The Greek word used for sorrow in this passage is
“lupete” – meaning, the pain or grief that can only Scripture reading for today: Genesis 39‐41
be experienced by two people who deeply love each
other. I suspect that this is the kind of grief Jacob’s If history ever produced a powerless figure, it was
family experienced during the years we will read Joseph. When you decide your life is unmanageable,
about in scripture over the next few days. Because make a note to yourself: reread the stories about the
we don’t know these family members personally, it’s life of Joseph. A favored son with a beautiful coat to
easy to find fault with all of them, and judge them prove it, his brothers throw him in a well and even
rather harshly. (What was the baby of the family sell him into slavery. Sounds terrible, but: “The Lord
thinking, squealing on the older siblings? If my kid was with Joseph, so he succeeded in everything he
brother had done that we would have tried to did as he served in the home of his Egyptian master.
smother him with a mattress!) So let’s not get lost Potiphar noticed this and realized that the Lord was
in the detachment. Let’s remember that these guys with Joseph, giving him success in everything he did.”
were a real family, and they suffered—just like many (Genesis 39:2‐3 NLT) For a guy sold into slavery,
of our families have—because we have all failed at Joseph was doing very well ‐until Potiphar’s wife got
some point to love each other well. We don’t like to the hots for him. Virtuous Joseph rebuffs her
think about that, do we? Then we read this verse in advances but the revenge‐filled Mrs. Potiphar still
Ephesians, and we may decide that the way not to manages to get Joseph locked up in prison.
grieve the Holy Spirit is to stop messing up. So we Seriously, this is soap opera material. Read it. But
berate ourselves and promise to do better in the for our purposes today, I want us to look at two key
future. Of course, that would be great! But I don’t points.
think that’s really what this passage is asking of us. • Joseph was powerless and his life was
As a parent, I read this verse differently. I am not unmanageable at every turn. Joseph just kept doing
sorrowed when my children make mistakes—that’s the next right thing. We can make the same choice.
how children learn. What sorrows me is when they As we name our powerlessness and acknowledge
refuse to acknowledge their wrongdoing. Why does the parts of our life that are unmanageable, we do
that grieve me so? Simply because I love them, and I not need to become victims of our own personal
know that when they fail to learn from their dramas. We can choose to just keep doing the next
mistakes, the pain of the error is in vain—it’s right thing.
wasted—and they will likely make the same mistakes
9
• In spite of all the dire circumstances surrounding the kind of desperation I’m talking about. If the heat
Joseph, God was with him. We too have this same isn’t really hot, people are simply not going to
promise. Scripture teaches us that God will never change their ways.
leave us nor forsake us. Practicing the principles of Unless and until you admit that you are powerless
recovery require us to come to accept this truth, and that control in this life is an illusion, your life will
even when we can’t see evidence of it in our daily stay pretty much the same. I once had a recovering
lives. “But the Lord was with Joseph in the prison and addict tell me that being told that his addiction
showed him his faithful love.” (Genesis 39:21NLT) No would kill him had no effect on him. (He welcomed
matter what your situation, the Lord is with you too. death.) But what compelled him to seek a new way
I want to encourage you to put on your God‐vision was this statement: “Man, you could live like this for
goggles and strain to see the unseen. Ask the Holy the next 50 years.”
Spirit to reveal God’s presence in your life today. So may I reiterate the wise words of this
Then look through the seen world into the unseen anonymous man? “You could live like this for the
and enjoy the practicing the presence of God. next 50 years!” Is that what you want?

Thought for today: I know your life may be a mess. I Thought for today: Despite what some might say,
suspect that even if you think your life is just God is still in the miracle business. Your miracle may
peachey, there are some messy parts hidden away in be just a few short minutes away. Consider allowing
the closets of your heart. Perhaps today is truly your today to be the first day of your new powerless
happy day – filled with good things and not one iota life—a life where you are willing to tell the truth
of heartburn on the horizon. In all these things, God about who you are and what your life is like—and
is with you. So it is possible today to celebrate His trust God to make a beautiful garden out of what
presence in either the messiness or the blessing of may now look like a pile of manure.
his good gifts.
Thought for tomorrow: There is no wisdom, no
Thought for tomorrow: Many are the plans in a insight, no plan that can succeed against the Lord.
man’s heart, but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails. Proverbs 21:30 NIV
Proverbs 19:21 NIV
…a man is a slave to whatever has mastered him. 2
January 9 Peter 2:19 NIV

Scripture reading for today: Genesis 42‐45 January 10

Only desperate people are willing to do desperate Scripture reading for today: Genesis 46‐50
things. People are simply reluctant to change their
established patterns of behaving. Consider the story As we finish up our reading in Genesis today, I
in Genesis you are about to read. Joseph, by the can’t wait for you to read one of my favorite verses
grace of God, now rules all of Egypt. Famine has in scripture:
struck his homeland, and Jacob sends all his sons
(with the exception of Benjamin, the youngest—see “You intended to harm me, but God intended it all for
Gen. 35:24) to Egypt to buy grain. good. He brought me to this position so I could save
As ruler, Joseph is the dispenser of the grain. the lives of many people.” Genesis 50:19 NLT
Through a series of events orchestrated by Joseph to
test the hearts of his brothers, Joseph finagles a way [Joseph speaks to his fearful brothers after his
to require them to return to Egypt with the youngest father’s death. His brothers, assuming that Joseph
brother. They promise to comply. But they break has waited to avenge their cruelty until after the
their promise, because Jacob refuses to cooperate. death of their dad, have lived in a constant state of
A continued famine and starvation force them to dis‐ease—waiting for the other shoe to drop.]
re‐evaluate and ultimately to return to Egypt. That’s
10
I just love this verse! I love it because Joseph spiritual framework for interpreting life’s ups and
provides us with a model that embraces both downs, can help us live our big dream AND deal with
honesty and kindness. I’ve often stopped after our big disappointments in a way that does not
reading this verse and thought about how a less derail God’s plans for us. I pray that today, you will
healthy person might have handled this whole find a new, more truthful, more blessed way to
situation. understand your past, so that you can live a more
• Joseph could have bought into the lie that he was abundant present!
a victim of life’s cruel tricks. Thrown into a well, sold
into slavery, falsely accused and imprisoned for a sex Thought for tomorrow: We were under great
crime he did not commit, he could have used all pressure, far beyond our ability to endure, so that we
those unfortunate circumstances to decide he was a despaired even of life. Indeed, in our hearts we felt
cursed man. That decided, he could have become the sentence of death. But this happened that we
rage‐filled, depressed, suicidal, self‐destructive, or might not rely on ourselves but on God, who raises
other‐destructive. the dead. 2 Corinthians 1:8‐9 NIV
• Joseph, eager to keep the family reputation intact
and desperate for familial relationship, could have January 11
decided to believe that all that his being thrown into
the well and sold into slavery was just an adolescent Scripture reading for today: Malachi
prank gone bad. He could have minimized the
intentions of his siblings. Living in denial, how If you’ve joined me in reading through the book of
effective would his choices been in the future? Genesis, I wonder if you notice the cycle of shame.
Burying all that unnamed resentment could have led The book starts out promising. Creator God pauses
him to self‐medicate. Mrs. Potiphar was certainly as He creates and crys out ‐ “It is good!” – (as He
willing to ease his pain. makes man in his own image). Adam waxes poetic
• Joseph could have been honest with himself about about his beautiful, newly minted bride. “CEO of the
his brothers’ intentions and developed a desperate garden” must have been an awesome career path.
need to prove them wrong. As a young boy, Joseph Then comes the nasty fruit‐tasting incident, and
had been given the vision of leadership. He could the cycle begins. Pain comes to Adam and Eve in
have worked hard and achieved his same status in various forms. They respond with fear (Who
Egypt—driven by insecurity rather than blessing. wouldn’t? God gave them one negative instruction,
From that frame of mind, he would have used his and they couldn’t even manage NOT to do that one
power to subdue his brothers in their time of need. little thing…) Shame has entered the picture, and
He could have used trickery and deceit in a way that suddenly Adam is afraid to be seen naked in front of
resulted in the ruination of his family. God. Blaming comes next; Adam blames Eve. They
But Joseph did none of those things. Joseph chose get kicked out of the garden and the next thing you
to firmly clamp on his God‐vision goggles and know, they’re having trouble with their kids. Sound
recognize the hand of God in every situation. I can familiar?
imagine how he sat in his jail cell and remembered. We have our cycles of pain too. Perhaps you can
Joseph remembered well. He remembered his take some time to reflect this week and pay
calling; he remembered God’s favor, blessing, attention to your own cycles of pain. For addicted
presence, and plan; he remembered the hurt people it goes like this: pain, reaching for pain relief,
suffered at the hand of his family. Yes, he short‐term pain reduction, negative consequences,
remembered all of that. Because of the way Joseph shame and guilt, renewed efforts to behave, buildup
remembered, he was able to suffer heartache and of pressure, more pain, and then more acting out. If
disappointment without self‐destructing. That, my you want more information on this cycling, you may
friends, is why I love this verse! want to check out the January 13‐14, 2007 message.
Look for it at www.northstarcommunity.com.
Thought for today: Joseph reminds us that accepting
the messy truths of our lives, when combined with a
11
Thought for today: I will leave you today with one There are three reasons why we reject the
thought. Lots and lots of people have been caught in opportunity to jump off the “ride”. Dale Ryan, co‐
the trap of the cycle of shame. Some have learned a author of a wonderful devotional book called Rooted
new way of living. They found it by busting out of in God’s Love: Meditations on Biblical Texts for
their denial and fear of the pain of change. There is People in Recovery says this:
help within the community of people who’ve learned
how to find their freedom. It’s my prayer that you “There are three common but unhelpful ways of
find that resource and embrace it if indeed you need dealing with our failures and sins.
it!
• First, there is denial. We tell ourselves that
Thought for tomorrow: You will never succeed at everybody has problems, so it doesn't really matter.
life if you try to hide your sins. Confess them and give Nothing of any value comes from this effort to cover
them up, then God will show mercy to you. Proverbs up.
28:13 Good News Bible • A second unhelpful strategy is to blame others for
what has happened. This can range from different
January 12 versions of 'the‐devil‐made‐me‐do‐it' to 'I'm just a
product of my environment'. Nothing of any value
Scripture reading for today: Matthew 1 ‐ 3 comes from this effort to cover‐up.
• Thirdly, instead of turning the emotional energy
Yesterday’s devotional addressed a cycle of outwards in blame we can turn it against ourselves
shame. as self‐loathing. We see ourselves as monsters and
what we have done as unforgivable. Nothing of
value comes from this effort to atone for our own
sins.
God invites us to another path. God invites us to
be transformed. God invites us to stop denying,
blaming and catastrophisizing about our lives. In
order to change and grow we need to face the
reality of our actions and attitudes. We need to
understand that our sins are like scarlet, like
crimson. They are life‐draining. Destructive. But we
are forgivable. We are invited to receive forgiveness.
And we are invited to change. The life‐draining
behaviors that we have pursued can be changed.
Changed from bright red to snow white. We do not
have to let denial, blame and shame lock us into
destructive, hurtful patterns. We can be clean and
sober. White as snow. Forgiven.”
[You can sign up to receive emails related to this
book by visiting www.Nacronline.com. Also, I added
the bullets and the color – the rest is a quote from

NACR January 11th's email meditation and found in

the book, Rooted in God’s Love.]
If you’ve ever been on this particular merry‐go‐

round, you know its dizzying, disorienting effects.
Thought for today: I pray that today you will have
The faster you run through the cycle, the sicker you
the opportunity to meditate on Dr. Ryan’s three
feel. Can you relate? Whether you admit it to
“unhelpfuls”: 1) Denying; 2) Blaming and 3)
yourself or not, the truth is: all of us can relate to the
Catastrophisizing – asking the Holy Spirit to renew
need for a deliverer from our circle of shame.
12
your mind and to help you see yourself just a bit draws heavily on the history of God’s people—a high
differently…a bit more truthfully, a lot more gently… value for the Jewish culture.
Matthew knew what we experience: all of us are in
Thought for tomorrow: Come now, let us reason need of a deliverer. Jesus represents hope. Matthew
together, says the Lord. Though your sins are like tells a story of hope. But what I particularly love
scarlet , they shall be as white as snow; though they about scripture is true in this gospel: God keeps it
are red as crimson, they shall be like wool. Isaiah real. Tomorrow we’ll examine one very real portion
1:18 NLT of this gospel.

January 13 Thought for today: I wonder what particular
strategies you have used to save yourself from the
Scripture reading for today: Matthew 4; Psalm 84 inevitable burdens associated with living on planet
and 85 earth. Have you self‐medicated, self‐improved, self‐
helped? Taking personal responsibility for our lives is
A Brief Look at the Gospels a good thing. Believing the illusion that we are in
control and responsible for the outcome of our
If you are following along with our devotional efforts is denial and is usually discouraging.
reading, you know that yesterday we began reading Common strategies: workaholism, addiction of
the gospel of Matthew. This is the first of the four various forms, hypochondria, body image
gospels (Matthew, Mark, Luke and John), which are obsessions, perfectionism, isolation, addiction to the
found in the New Testament portion of the approval of others
scriptures. The first three gospels are pretty similar,
while John has some noticeable differences in Thought for tomorrow: When he [Jesus] saw the
material. This used to freak me out. crowds, he had compassion on them because they
When I first began reading scripture, I didn’t like were confused and helpless, like sheep without a
any incongruence in the telling of the story of the life shepherd. Matthew 9:37 NLT
of Jesus. The problem, I have come to discover, was
with some basic misunderstandings on my part. I January 14
was reading these books as if they were four
different news accounts by four different Scripture reading for today: Matthew 5; Psalm 86 ‐
eyewitnesses. I expected a bit of variation, but I was 88
focused on the timeline of events, not the content.
God did not share my perspective as His Spirit When he [Jesus] saw the crowds, he had compassion
guided these early recorders. Time was not His on them because they were confused and helpless,
emphasis; He was trying to make a point, a different like sheep without a shepherd. Matthew 9:37 NLT
point, in each of these accounts. In the book of
Matthew, the apostle Matthew (who was a tax When I was a kid, my three younger brothers and I
collector) was the human author. Scholars love to used to get kind of wild. Every night after dinner, our
argue about this kind of thing, but most people parents would drink coffee and eat dessert and we’d
agree on this point. run upstairs to our rooms to play. It usually got loud
Which gospel came first in the time line? Again, and rough and resulted in injury. So a tradition
there is lots of debate, but most scholars would say began. As the noise escalated and the chandelier
that Matthew was written after Mark. shook, my dad would begin speaking, then hollering,
What is the purpose for this book? Matthew is “Don’t make me come up there!” Finally, the chaos
driven to prove to his Jewish readers that Jesus is would result in my dad coming up and intervening.
their Messiah. He accomplishes this through That’s what shepherds do; they intervene. Why do
comparing the life of Jesus with the prophetic words shepherds get up from a good cup of coffee,
about the Messiah written in the Old Testament. He pleasant conversation, and a yummy dessert?
Because they have compassion on their confused
13
and helpless sheep. Kids don’t know what is best for I don’t know where you come from or what DNA
them. Sometimes we can get to be 45 years old and may have contributed to your powerless and
realize that in some ways we’re still like a small unmanageable life. But I know this: Jesus, our
child—confused and helpless, like sheep without a deliverer, will deliver us from evil without shame,
shepherd. blame, or condemnation.
Notice that the shepherd is motivated by
compassion, not control. He doesn’t condemn the Thought for today: Because of the motivation of
sheep because they’re acting like sheep. He Jesus’ heart, and in light of the awesome resources
intervenes because he loves those silly sheep. The at his disposal, he is trustworthy and well qualified
shepherd also distinguishes between judging and to meet us at our point of greatest need. I pray that
using good judgment—an important point. Judging today will be a day when you draw nearer to him.
the sheep would lead to blaming, shaming, and
condemnation. Using good judgment requires the Thought for tomorrow: For we do not have a high
shepherd to pause to prepare and decide the best priest who is unable to sympathize with our
course of action for the sheep. weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted
I think all of us just expect Jesus to be in every way, just as we are—yet was without sin. Let
compassionate. After all, he’s the Son of God! But he us then approach the throne of grace with
was also the son of a woman, and he was born into a confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find
family system. I believe that we cannot presume on grace to help us in our time of need. Hebrews 4:15‐
the compassion of Christ. It’s hard work to maintain 16 NIV
patience with a bunch of sheep running wild and
acting up. So I’d like to suggest that you set aside January 15
your assumption that Jesus is a good guy, and
consider how his family might have taught him Scripture reading for today: Matthew 6 – 7; Psalm
something about being the kind of guy who looks 89
past the warts and sees others as God intended for
them to be. Yesterday’s devotional reading was Matthew 5. If
The first chapter of Matthew is a genealogy of you haven’t read it yet, take a moment and do so.
Jesus. Matthew finds this important, because he’s You have just read what modern‐day scholars have
trying to prove to his Jewish friends that Jesus is who called, “The Sermon on the Mount.” This is the first
the prophets predicted he would be: a Messiah from of five extended teachings by Jesus found in
the line of David and Abraham. Most genealogies do Matthew. Scholars differ in their opinions regarding
not include women, but this one does. Women whether this was one long, marathon sermon or a
didn’t get much respect back in the days of Jesus. I compilation of the teachings of Jesus.
find it curious that God inspired Matthew to include It’s an interesting body of work. It begins with a cry
some women. And not just any women; there were for brokenness and humility, because according to
some “bad girls” from the Bible. Jesus, it is in these times when we are blessed. Then
Tamar, the mother of Zerah (verse 3) pretended to Jesus sets before us a clarion call to live by a moral
be a prostitute, slept with her father‐in‐law, and and ethical standard that is so high that many have
then blackmailed him to get what she wanted. questioned whether it could ever be met. But that,
Rahab (verse 5) was a prostitute who helped some of course, is the point; it cannot be obtained by
of God’s people escape the bad guys; but she was mere mortals.
indeed a prostitute, and she came from a group of This isn’t supposed to be a quick read—easily
people that were considered quite unsavory. understood and applied without too much hassle.
Solomon’s mom was Uriah’s wife (verse 6), who Jesus is a master teacher, knowing that sometimes it
committed adultery with King David. These people is best to leave his audience confused and slightly off
had messy, messy lives. Despite this messy family balance. One truth is clear and indisputable in the
tree, though, God chose this family to provide Jesus messages of Christ: Apart from him, we can do
with his earthly DNA. nothing. So why should it surprise us that his
14
messages are challenging, confusing, and Why? Because the message was too hard. Finding
uncomfortable? I think it is because: our way back to God is not the same thing as landing
• We are a people more inclined to want to be God, on easy street. Tom Hanks had a great line in the
than we are willing to become imitators of God movie, “A League of Their Own,” an awesome movie
(remember the story of Adam and Eve?). about women’s baseball leagues during the war. One
of the girls is crying after he yells at her, and he
• Jesus wasn’t trying to gain a market share or get shouts in frustration, “There’s no crying in baseball!”
his face on the cover of People magazine (“I do not He was delivering a hard message, and some could
accept praise from men.” John 5:41 NIV). He was handle it while many could not. Well, welcome to
trying to present the plans and purposes of God, the real world. If we think the message of the gospel
and He was inviting us to join God in his pre‐ is soft and gentle, we’re wrong. I think the message
designed epic adventure. This plan was not, and is is much better than just the promise of an easy life.
not, up for discussion and debate. It is God’s plan.
Our choice is not about approving His plan; it is Thought for tomorrow: For God has not given us a
about whether or not we are going to participate spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love and self‐
in His plan. discipline. 2 Timothy 1:9 NLT
• It’s a good thing Jesus wasn’t going for the popular
vote, because his plan involved a decidedly So consider being one of the few who are willing
unpopular concept: Deny yourself. to accept their chosen status. Begin by
So no wonder Matthew 5 is confusing. We acknowledging your personal powerlessness.
naturally seek the softer, gentler way. We prefer
microwaves to crock pots; speed dating to January 16
relationship building; instant gratification to delayed
gratification. We are wired in this way. But it is not Scripture reading for today: Matthew 8‐9; Psalm 90
healthy, nor is it in keeping with God’s plans for us.
It’s time for each of us to own up to the fact that Then Jesus got into the boat and started across the
though we may say we love God with all our heart, lake with his disciples. Suddenly, a fierce storm struck
mind, soul and strength, our Day Timers may prove the lake, with waves breaking into the boat. But
otherwise. That duality of thinking results in Jesus was sleeping. The disciples went and woke him
powerless and unmanageable living. up, shouting, “Lord, save us! We’re going to drown!”
Jesus responded, “Why are you afraid? You have so
You should also know this Timothy, that in the last little faith!” Then he got up and rebuked the wind
days there will be very difficult times. For people will and waves, and suddenly there was a great calm.
love only themselves and their money. They will be The disciples were amazed, “Who is this man?”
boastful and proud, scoffing at God, disobedient to they asked, “Even the winds and waves obey him!”
their parents, and ungrateful. They will consider Matthew 8:23‐27 NLT
nothing sacred. They will be unloving and
unforgiving; they will slander others and have no We have been looking at the principles of
self‐control; they will be cruel and have no interest in powerlessness and unmanageability for two weeks
what is good. They will betray their friends, be in this devotional series.
reckless, be puffed up with pride, and love pleasure Powerless: It’s a tough concept, but there’s no
rather than God. They will act as if they are religious, need to proceed until admission is made – I do not
but they will reject the power that could make them have the power to live life well; my life is not
godly. 2 Timothy 3:1‐5 NLT working for me. For those who come into this study
as believers, take this one step further – I do not
Thought for today: “From this time many of his have the power to live life as God intends. (Don’t get
disciples turned back and no longer followed him.” hung up here if you’re not a believer; all of us are in
John 6:66 NIV different places in our journey of faith. But this is a
spiritual program, and for those who do believe, it’s
15
time to get real and acknowledge that our lives truly
are not congruent with God’s will for us.) At the Thought for today: But there is one who does have
heart of powerlessness is the acknowledgement that the power; his name is Jesus. He hears our voice and
we cannot stop doing whatever we’re doing that is responds to our cries for help. I love the New Living
leading to unmanageability; nor can we consistently Translation, which states that “Jesus responded” to
maintain a commitment to choices that are positive, the cries of his friends; “He rebuked” the wind and
healing and healthy – in keeping with the deepest waves. Sometimes I fear that God will rebuke me
desires of our heart. When all our strategies to instead of the storms in my life. If I may be brutally
control ourselves and others stop working, we’re honest, sometimes I forget the true character of God
ready to admit that We are powerless. 2 and falsely believe that God himself is responsible
I woke up this morning with a longer list of things for my fear‐inducing circumstances. Thankfully, we
to do than time to do them. I found myself have God’s word to remind us that “God has not
squirming and agitated before I even had the sunrise given us a spirit of fear…” (2 Timothy 1:9 NLT).
to keep me company. My shoulder is a little sore Today, I pray that you will focus on God’s power and
from an overly exuberant workout last week, and my His character. May you see His hand, and recognize
heels needed an extra stretch this morning before His response when you cry out to Him.
they’d agree to accompany my feet downstairs.
Aging isn’t for sissies. That said, one of the benefits Thought for tomorrow: He who trusts in himself is a
of aging is the ability to laugh at oneself; and before fool, but he who walks in wisdom is kept safe.
too long, I was chuckling. Proverbs 28:26 NIV
I knew I was trudging downstairs to hot coffee and
morning devotions—focusing on powerlessness! January 17
My, how God had worked during the night to
prepare my mind to receive His message of hope. I Scripture reading for today: Matthew 10‐1l; Psalm
was feeling powerless before I was fully awake. This, 91
I thought to myself, is going to be an awesome day.
So I turned to my readings in Matthew and was Sometimes people like to argue the point of
soon immersed in the story of Jesus and his disciples. “powerlessness.” If I listen long enough, I usually
While crossing the lake, a sudden storm threatens hear someone speak of the fear of where the
the safety of the disciples, who believe they are on powerless principle might take them. Specifically, my
the verge of capsizing. If you’ve ever been in a boat friends who like to talk about these things want to
during a storm, you get the picture. It is a helpless make certain that I can distinguish between
feeling to be in the middle of a lot of water, knowing concepts like: powerless versus irresponsible,
there is nothing you can do but hold on for the ride. powerless versus helpless and hopeless, and
This is exactly the perspective we need to grasp powerless versus passive. These are excellent
and experience in our daily living. We have some distinctions. I do not believe that powerless is equal
choices and many opportunities to make responsible to: irresponsible, helpless, hopeless or passive living.
decisions, but we are powerless over many, many After Jesus left the girl’s home, two blind men
aspects of our lives. We’ve spent a long time trying followed along behind him, shouting, “Son of David,
to figure out how to build boats that won’t sink, to have mercy on us!” They went right into the house
outfit ourselves with life preservers that won’t fail, where he was staying, and Jesus asked them, “Do
to make pets out of sharks and other scary sea you believe I can make you see?” Matthew 9:27‐28
creatures, and in general—to figure out how to NLT
avoid pain. But the bottom line is this: we cannot Reread the scripture and note the following: these
control our own destinies. We are powerless over were blind guys. Jesus had just performed a miracle,
many factors that can change our lives in an instant. the news of which had “swept through the entire
countryside” (Matthew 9:26 NLT). Can you imagine
how the crowds swarmed Jesus? Would it have been
2
The Christ-Centered 12 Step Study Guide – Step 1, a NorthStar easy to follow behind him? Sighted individuals
Community publication, copyright pending 2005, p.9.
16
probably had difficulty jostling for positions. How
well do we think two blind men would fare? When Thought for today: Have you worried that admitting
Jesus got to his destination, the scripture says, “they your powerless condition is a sign of weakness?
went right into the house where he was staying.” Those two blind men got this result from their
These guys were persistent. Perhaps the more polite honest confession of powerlessness:
thing to do would have been to pause at the door
and wait for Jesus to leave the house. But these guys “Then he touched their eyes and said, “Because of
weren’t interested in polite social norms; they your faith, it will happen.” Then their eyes were
wanted a miracle. They were powerless over their opened, and they could see! Matthew 9:29‐30 NLT
disease, but they were not irresponsible in looking
for a solution. Nor were they helpless, hopeless, or Thought for tomorrow: "So then, let us not be like
passive in their pursuit of freedom from their others, who are asleep, but let us be alert and self‐
disease. I believe that acknowledging powerlessness controlled…" 1 Thessalonians 5:6
is, at its core, all about honesty.
January 18
"So then, let us not be like others, who are asleep,
but let us be alert and self‐controlled." 1 Scripture reading for today: Matthew 12‐13; Psalm
Thessalonians 5:6 92

“The first step toward honesty is to pay attention. The Kingdom of Heaven is like…a farmer who
In the words of this text, the choices we face are planted a good seed in his field…a mustard seed…the
either to sleep or to be alert and self‐controlled. yeast a woman used in making bread…a treasure a
There are days when we would rather 'sleep'. There man discovered hidden...a merchant on the lookout
are days when the emotional numbness of denial for choice pearls...a fishing net thrown into the
seems less painful than the alertness required by water that catches fish of all kinds…Every disciple in
recovery. Couldn't we just 'let it ride' for a day? the Kingdom of Heaven is like a homeowner who
Couldn't we just 'sleep' for a while? Sometimes brings from his storeroom new gems of truth as well
people encourage us to 'sleep'. "Why are you still as old.—the words of Jesus
paying attention to that? It was a long time ago!" Or Jesus used parables to talk about the Kingdom of
"Why are you still 'holding on' to that? Just forgive Heaven, so often it was very hard for the listener to
and get it behind you." Wouldn't it be great to get understand the meanings behind these simple‐but‐
this over with quickly and not have to pay attention mysterious stories. (So how much harder it is for
to it anymore? There is a rest, a serenity, that comes us—living in a different century—without most of
from God. But it comes from 'alertness' not from the context clues that those original hearers brought
'sleep'. God's peace is not like the 'sleep' in this text. to these storytelling experiences?!)
This sleep is denial, it is avoidance, it is distraction, it As you read through these stories, go slowly. Don’t
is pretending, it is death. Being alert means that we skim over the parts that are hard to understand.
allow ourselves to see and hear, to use our senses Stop. Pause. Discover the part of the story that
and mind and heart. It means that we pay attention seems weird to you. Acknowledge that this “God
to what is happening inside of us and around us. The stuff” may have a certain simple beauty, but it is also
text urges us to be alert, to pay attention. Pay deep, profound, and mysterious.
attention, it urges, even if life is painful, even if it is It’s OK to not have all the answers. It’s OK to be
not what we want it to be.” 3 confused. It’s OK to ask for help. It’s OK to say, “I
don’t know.” Jesus was perfectly OK with leaving
the crowds, whom he had great compassion for,
without clear‐cut answers to all their questions.
3
Copyright 1991 Dale and Juanita Ryan. ROOTED IN GOD'S
LOVE (the book from which these meditations are taken, is back in

print! You can purchase it at our book table at NorthStar
Community or to order call at 714-529-6227 or order online at previous days can be viewed at:
http://www.nacronline.com. Meditations by Dale Ryan from http://two.pairlist.net/pipermail/nacrmed/
17
“As soon as Jesus heard the news, he left in a boat
Thought for today: Sometimes early in recovery, we to a remote area to be alone. But the crowds heard
think that someday we’re going to “arrive” and our where he was headed and followed on foot from
lives are going to be practically perfect. Maybe that many towns.” Matthew 14:13 NLT
is how recovery will be for you. For me, it hasn’t • The crowds gathered in this remote place filled
happened. I am excited to report that I have gotten a with needs. A grief‐stricken Jesus, desiring to be
lot more comfortable with accepting the fact that alone, is bombarded instead with the relentless
this whole recovery process is more like a journey requests of others. Jesus asks his disciples to feed
than a quick trip to a destination vacation. It’s more the hungry crowd, and they couldn’t figure out how
a lifestyle than a crash diet. It’s more like a series of to do so.
decisions made moment by moment than it is one “…he had compassion on them and healed their
big, grandiose decision that magically works itself sick… About 5,000 men were fed that day, in addition
out into a neat and tidy life. May today be a day that to all the women and children!” Matthew 14:14,21
you draw nearer to God, even if it turns out to be a NLT
messy, confusing day. The really great news is that • Jesus again tries to grab some quiet time alone.
the Kingdom of Heaven is real, it is with us even Meanwhile, the disciples get caught in a storm on
now, and it is very, very cool. the lake. Jesus calms their fears and the storm.
While Jesus is busy healing and feeding and rescuing,
Thought for tomorrow: For if you listen to the word he says to Peter: “You have so little faith, why did
and don’t obey, it is like glancing at your face in a you doubt me?”
mirror. You see yourself, walk away, and forget what 1. Jesus has both the power and perspective to
you look like. James 1:23‐24 NLT respond appropriately to the needs around Him,
When I was a child, I spoke and thought and even when the circumstances seem overwhelming.
reasoned as a child. But when I grew up, I put away Jesus responds by doing what he always does:
childish things. Now we see things imperfectly as in a meeting those needs with a spirit of compassion.
cloudy mirror, but then we will see everything with 2. Jesus does not wait to provide for the needs of his
perfect clarity. All that I know now is partial and people as a reward for their good behaviors. His
incomplete, but then I will know everything friend was beheaded by the political powers of the
completely, just as God now knows me completely. 1 day, his hometown people (see 13:57) refused to
Corinthians 13:11‐12 NLT believe in him, crowds of strangers followed him
Step one isn’t about putting childish things aside; relentlessly, and his own disciples didn’t “get it.”
it’s one little step. It’s the step we take when we say: Jesus is filled with compassion even though the
Sometimes I don’t even understand why I do what I people are a messy lot, prone to fickle loyalties
do. Two writers in scripture describe this experience and self‐interest. (Take a moment and let this sink
to us – without shame or condemnation. It’s OK to in. This was hard for Jesus. He was the Son of God.
know we’re in need of growing up. It’s awesome to Do we therefore assume that his super powers
think that someday our minds will be less cloudy. numbed him to the relentless messiness of the
Step one is where the process begins. people he came to save? Do we think that he was
somehow immune to their offensiveness and
January 19 insensitivities?)
I hope that you have a working knowledge of your
Scripture reading for today: Matthew 14 – 15; Psalm own powerless dependencies and the
93 unmanageability that has resulted from them. Sit for
a moment and think of your most heart‐wrenching
Bad days happen. Consider the day Jesus had in concerns.
the chapters we’re reading from today in Matthew. If you had been among the crowds on Jesus’ very
• His cousin and most loyal advocate, John the bad day, would your pain have compelled you to
Baptist, is cruelly and unjustly beheaded simply pursue him? In the rush of the day, would you have
because of a run‐in with a “mean girl.” forgotten to pack a lunch for yourself and your
18
family? Would you have elbowed your way through skeletal and ghoulish—hardly human. She also
the crowds, pushed past your weaker or more timid looked crazy.
neighbors in an effort to have a word with Jesus? As “When I look in the mirror, all I see is this fat roll,”
you pushed and shoved, what would have happened she lamented. All the audience could see was her
if, miraculously, the crowd parted and you found bone structure. A fat roll would have been a
yourself face to face with Him? Knowing time was beautiful upgrade from the stick figure in front of us.
short, what would you ask of Him? I’ve seen meth addicts with more going for them.
I don’t mean to judge her; I’ve been there and
Thought for today: Bad days are sometimes directly done that myself. Eating disorders are lamentable.
related to our poor choices. If everyone had just It’s a terrible thing to have an obsession in the mind
packed a lunch before they started out to spend the constantly chattering away a litany of condemning
day with Jesus, it wouldn’t have been necessary for thoughts and outright lies. This young woman is
Jesus not only to heal but to feed too. Sometimes struggling with an ugly dependency. Her obsession
things go bad because we’ve stood firm and done with thinness is her way of seeking a satisfying life. I
right, like John the Baptist! Sometimes we do right, know that sounds like madness, but think about
and nothing goes particularly wrong, but we’re still yourself: who or what are you depending on to
really, really tired. And then the next right thing provide you a satisfying life?
comes along for us to do before our batteries get Dependencies: These are the people, places,
recharged. If you woke up to a bad day, then maybe and/or things that if we are brutally honest, we do
today is a good day to practice the principle Jesus not think we could live without. They are the things
modeled for us on his bad day: He went off and had we cling to, even when clear evidence indicates they
some alone time. True, he was interrupted. His are not good for us and depending on this is not
compassion and calling guided him as he gracefully working. 4
managed the interruptions to his quiet time. But Instead of scrunching up our noses in disgust at
eventually, he got back to the thing he knew he this woman’s plight, what if we decided to ask God
needed: solitary time with God. I hope you will find these questions: How am I living like her? What are
that today. I pray that you will push through the list my dependencies? What condemning thoughts and
of things “to do” and insist on a clear path to time blatant lies am I believing?
with God. I trust that the Holy Spirit will guide your
conversation. I am excited to see how God will have Thought for today: Believing that any person, place,
compassion on you as He does that thing He does— or thing can satisfy our every desire is insanity; it is
heal, feed, and rescue the helpless, the hopeless, the also quite common. Step one is an invitation for us
oppressed. to set aside our expectations for self‐satisfaction and
to begin to get real about the source of eternal
Thought for tomorrow: I am worn out from satisfaction.
groaning; all night long I flood my bed with weeping
and drench my couch with tears. My eyes grow weak Thought for tomorrow: Have mercy on me, Lord, for
with sorrow; they fail because of all my foes. Psalm I am in distress. Tears blur my eyes. My body and
6:6‐7 NIV soul are withering away. I am dying from grief; my
years are shortened by sadness. Sin has drained my
January 20 strength; I am wasting away from within. Psalm
31:9‐10 NLT
Scripture reading for today: Matthew 17 – 18; Psalm
94

Yesterday I was watching television while trotting
along on my treadmill. The news show featured a
woman with a severe eating disorder. She looked
4
The Christ-Centered 12 Step Study Guide, Step 1, A NorthStar
Community Publication, p. 10.
19
January 21 morphed—alcohol, drugs, sexual addiction. The
relationships affected had varied—father, husband,
Scripture reading for today: Matthew 19 – 20; Psalm son, new husband. But the result was the same: this
95 woman had a life filled with addicted people that
she loved.
Dependencies: These are the people, places, How does this happen? Today you’re going to read
and/or things that if we are brutally honest, we do about a mother who has one simple dream; she
not think we could live without. They are the things wants her boys to succeed in life. She goes to Jesus
we cling to, even when clear evidence indicates they with her request. Perspective allows us to read this
are not good for us and depending on this is not story and interpret Jesus’ words with the clarity only
working. 5 hindsight provides. She wants her boys to have
I slid into a seat in a hurry. Running late, I barely power and prestige, but Jesus is predicting a far
made it through the door before the recovery different life.
meeting commenced. The room was crowded, and I “…just as the Son of Man did not come to be
glanced apologetically at the woman I squeezed next served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom
to in our circle of pain. Uh oh, a newcomer, I for many.” Matthew 20:28 NIV
thought. I knew the look. The meeting progressed,
and this gal got increasingly hostile. Thought for today: As you are considering the
“This is so stupid. These people are pathetic. I people, places, and things that you believe you
don’t even know why I’m here. This is just what I cannot live without, beware. It is entirely possible
expected; all these people do is complain.” On and that you, like the rest of us, lack clarity. You may
on she muttered. Her arms were crossed, and her desire things, that if you receive them, will cost you
face was furrowed with lines of frustration. dearly. The angry lady from the meeting didn’t try to
After the meeting ended, I wanted to run from pick two husbands with addictions; she certainly
her. She reminded me too much of…someone. We didn’t wake up every morning with dream for her
walked out together, and she continued to talk. son to end up with a substance‐abuse issue. She still
“I can’t believe this. I have been to these meetings doesn’t know how all this happened. Dependencies
before. I hate the word ‘codependency.’ I hate it!” on people, places, and things leave us vulnerable
she hissed. and powerless. They make life unmanageable.
“Why did you come today?” I asked.
“Because I’ve just found out my new husband is a Thought for tomorrow: The thief comes only to
pervert. I can’t believe I’m in this position. Again.” steal and kill and destroy. I have come that they may
“Again?” have life, and have it to the full. John 10:10 NIV
“My last husband was an alcoholic. I’ve got a son
in jail because of his drug problems. So I know all Life to the full—a rich and satisfying life—will never
about this addiction stuff.” She paused for a long be found as long as we are living in denial, walking
time, studying her shoes. “I can’t believe I am here.” around staring at our feet and muttering, “How did
We went for coffee, and I listened to the rest of this happen?”
the story. As a young girl, she made one solemn vow
to herself: If she could get away from her alcoholic January 22
parents, she would never ever live with an addict
again. It’s the only dream she ever had for herself; Scripture reading for today: Matthew 21 – 22; Psalm
she wanted a life free from addicts. No wonder she 96
was so mad. She had one small goal, which she
never achieved, and she had no clue as to how she For where your treasure is, there your heart will be
ended up in this mess again. The addiction issue had also. Matthew 6:21 NIV
Maybe you aren’t quite ready to tell this to anyone
else, but take a moment and tell yourself the truth:
5
The Christ-Centered 12 Step Study Guide, Step 1, A NorthStar Who or what do you treasure?
Community Publication, p. 10.
20
“After twenty years of listening to the yearnings of January 23
people’s hearts, I am convinced that all human
beings have an inborn desire for God. Whether we Scripture reading for today: Matthew 23 – 25; Psalm
are consciously religious or not, this desire is our 96
deepest longing and our most precious treasure. It
gives us meaning. Some of us have repressed this • A bright, articulate, funny, and smart kid (who
desire, burying it beneath so many other interests always used to say, “I’m going to grow up and be a
that we are completely unaware of it. Or we may doctor; I want to make sick kids well.”) dropped out
experience it in different ways—as a longing for of high school and is currently serving out a felony
wholeness, completion, or fulfillment. Regardless of conviction for drug trafficking.
how we describe it, it is a longing for love. This • A homeless person, huddled inside an office
yearning is the essence of the human spirit; it is the doorway trying to keep warm, startles me as I round
origin of our highest hopes and most noble dreams. the corner and head into a nearby building on my
Modern theology describes this desire as God given. way to a meeting. I know this person. He is a
But something gets in the way. Not only are we beautiful, talented, bright musician. This kid doesn’t
unable to fulfill the commandments; we often even make music anymore.
ignore our desire to do so. The longing at the center • I know a grandpa who loves his kids and grandkids
of our hearts repeatedly disappears from our more than life itself, but not more than his addiction
awareness, and its energy is usurped by forces that loves him. His wife wants someone to visit him in
are not at all loving. Our desires are captured, and prison and maybe write him sometimes. She can’t
we give ourselves over to things that, in our deepest stand to look at him, yet she loves him. His addiction
honesty, we really do not want.” 6 (See Matthew has forced his kids to sever all ties with the family. A
22:37‐40) drunken incident has landed him in jail.
What extreme stories, you may say. But they are
Have you ignored your desire to love God and not so extreme, though I wish they were. I have
others? hundreds of stories like this hidden in my heart.
These just happen to be three families who gave me
Thought for today: Denial is a terrible thing. It blinds permission to share their stories today. They are
us to the truth; sometimes “our desires are common stories. Families across every economic and
captured, and we give ourselves over to things that, racial spectrum are living these stories. Many live in
in our deepest honesty, we really do not want.” I self‐imposed isolation—ashamed to find themselves
want you to know this very hard truth: There are in these kinds of situations. Patrick Carnes, in Out of
some things that we say we do because we are the Shadows, makes the point that the fatal
motivated by “love,” when the truth is that we are progression of addiction begins years and years
acting in ways that reject love—love for others, love before anyone considers the addiction more than
for God, love for self… just a habit.
Consider the words of Gerald May (Addiction and
Thought for tomorrow: Lord, help us to see Grace, p.13): “Addiction uses up desire. It is like a
ourselves as you see us, and give us the grace and psychic malignancy, sucking our life energy into
mercy we so desperately need. specific obsessions and compulsions, leaving less and
less energy available for other people and other
There is a way that seems right to a man, but in the pursuits. Spiritually, addiction is a deep‐seated form
end it leads to death. Proverbs 14:12 NIV of idolatry. The objects of our addictions become our
false gods. These are what we worship, what we
All a man’s ways seem innocent to him, but motives attend to, where we give our time and energy,
are weighed by the Lord. Proverbs 16:2 NIV instead of love. Addiction, then, displaces and
supplants God’s love as the source and object of our
deepest true desire. It is, as one modern spiritual
6
Addiction and Grace Love and Spirituality in the Healing of writer has called it, a “counterfeit of religious
Addictions, by Gerald G. May,, M.D., Harper Collins, 1991, p.1.
21
presence.” I bring this up because each of us has an Experience has taught me that a lot of verbal
idol or two hidden in our closet of secrets. Now expressions of “turning over a new leaf”, new plans,
would be a great time to acknowledge how truly new promises and surefire solutions usually slide
powerless we are over these tiny idols that have glibly off the lips of those who are in the process of
become our false gods. moving one day closer to their next relapse. I also
believe that this man was completely sincere. He
Thought for today: As you read this devotion, did wants to be right and to find that new leaf, execute
you wonder why I included those stories about the plan, fulfill the promises, and find a solution to
addiction? I did it with prayer and hope. My prayer is his plaguing hurts.
that you will hear these stories, and it will move your Today you’re going to read in Matthew 26 how
heart to listen to what’s really going on inside you. I Peter and Jesus approached their personal times of
pray that instead of your life becoming a story, you testing. In Matthew 26:31‐35, Jesus warns Peter. He
will find your place in God’s story and live your tells him, “Tonight all of you will desert me.” Peter
grand, epic adventure. We never discover grand, replies with a confidence and bravado that leave me
epic adventures when we chase after false gods. My queasy, “NO!” Peter insisted. “Even if I have to die
hope is that brutal honesty with self today could with you, I will never deny you!” A short while later,
ward off those “counterfeit religious presences” that Peter denies Jesus—not once, not twice, but three
come to steal, kill, and destroy. I’m hoping for you a times.
satisfying, abundant life. In Matthew 26:36‐46, Jesus confronts his own
demons. Three times he went in prayer to his father
Thought for tomorrow: It is the nature of desire not and said (this is my paraphrase), “I don’t want to do
to be satisfied, and most human beings live only for this! Get me out of here! There’s got to be another
the gratification of it.—Aristotle way. I feel terrible! I want a way out! But I also want
to please you, dad, and I want to do what you want
January 24 me to more than anything else.” Then Jesus goes off
and saves the world. But don’t miss the point; he
Scripture reading for today: Matthew 26 – 28; Psalm was reluctant, he was in pain, and he was honest. (If
97 you’re unfamiliar with the particulars of all that
Jesus did in the days that followed to save us, you
“Addiction is about wanting to be hungry, about might want to read our Insight Journal entitled
the need to be unsatisfied. This, it turned out, was “Finding Our Way Back to God Part 3.” You can get a
the truth that, for the longest time, I sought to copy at www.NorthStarCommunity.com).)
deny.” William Leith – author of The Hungry Years: We can ignore the principles found in step one,
Confessions of a Food Addict (Gotham) and act like Peter, or we can choose to follow the
Denial: Denial is so much more than a river in model of Christ. As you decide, think about the
Egypt! It’s that stubborn propensity to see things outcome for each man. Peter, shame‐filled and
with a skewed perspective. Denial is a range of appalled; Christ, strengthened and empowered to
maneuvers designed to reduce awareness of the fact live God’s big dream for him.
that we have problems; we have mislabeled our
problems; our problems are beyond our capacity to Thought for today: Here’s one more important
solve (independently of God). thought. Notice that even though Peter acted like a
I so hope the guy I talked to yesterday follows big old goof, Jesus restored him in spite of his
through with his good intentions. After a prolonged goofiness. Peter goes on to lead the church, preach
and almost fatal relapse, he showed up at our great sermons, heal people, and yes, even suffer for
celebration service at NorthStar Community, loaded the cause. That says so much more about God’s
up with promises and plans for reform. I truly hope character than it does Peter’s ability to perform
that this time he succeeds. I do. But I’m getting older under pressure. So I leave you today with great
and although I can’t claim to be wiser, I do have hope. Whether we effectively master step one or
more experience. not, God continues to love and care for us. Our
22
freedom is not contingent upon our good behaving faith have always struggled with questions like
but upon God’s mercy and grace. these. We can take comfort and courage from
knowing that the prophets also asked urgent
Thought for tomorrow: Jesus replied, “I tell you the questions similar to our own. 7
truth, everyone who sins is a slave to sin. Now a
slave has no permanent place in the family, but a son Thought for today: Step one is the perfect place to
belongs to it forever. So if the son sets you free, you admit that we don’t have all the answers. It’s the
will be free indeed.” John 8:34‐36 NIV perfect time to tell ourselves the truth; we may not
like all the answers that time reveals. That’s pretty
January 25 powerless, isn’t it? How does that make you feel?
But find comfort in this word of encouragement:
Scripture reading for today: Haggai and Psalm 98 God is much bigger than our feelings about Him.

I’m currently reading a book that challenges Thought for tomorrow: How long, O Lord, must I
everything I believe. My son is reading a book call for help but you do not listen? Or cry out to you,
written by a famous agnostic philosopher, and the "Violence!" but you do not save? Why do you make
author is also sharing a perspective wildly different me look at injustice? Why do you tolerate wrong?
from what we usually read around our house. (My Destruction and violence are before me; there is
fifteen year old is reading this book because of a lyric strife, and conflict abounds. Habakkuk 1:1‐3 NIV
in a song; go figure.) No doubt you’re tempted to
suggest that my son and I stop reading books written January 26
by heathens. But the book I’m reading was written
by a world renowned theologian! We’re going to Scripture reading for today: Exodus 1 – 3
have to come up with a different strategy if we want
to go through life without our preciously held beliefs In yesterday’s devotion, I mentioned that my
being challenged. Books are not the only way our youngest child was reading a book in which the very
beliefs get challenged. When we decide to get premise is the antithesis of everything our family
serious about recovery, honesty has to become a professes to believe. At first, he was scared to tell
treasured value. So let’s get honest. Sometimes we me that he had checked it out of the library. He was
question our belief in God. worried I would disapprove.
Where were you God? Where were you I did disapprove. I did not like it that my son
when I needed you? Didn't you see the violence? hesitated for a moment about telling me that he was
The abuse? The injustice? Didn't you care? There reading a book, even a book that challenged our
are times in recovery when we are full of beliefs! I explained to my boy that if reading a book
questions about God. The pain of past trauma can could shake his faith, then all that proved is that his
be intensified when we begin to struggle with faith was pretty unsettled before he picked up that
these hard questions about God. It is important to book. I assured him that if this is what we
acknowledge that these questions about God are discovered, it was a good thing to learn at fifteen
not academic questions. No theoretical rather than at 40. I asked him to come to me if he
explanation of the problem of pain will soothe our had any questions or concerns about what he read.
raging, confused hearts. These are urgent, In the end, he ended up telling me example upon
personal questions about God and about God's example about how this author had really missed
involvement in our lives. We want to know that the boat. It has been a really cool experience. But
God sees and cares and intervenes in our lives. We what if he had found things in the book that he had
need God. We need God's love. We need God's wanted to incorporate into his belief system? Would
help. It is an important source of encouragement
to know that we are not the first to ask these hard
questions. There is clear biblical precedent for 7
Devotional for January 23, 2007 found on line at nacronline.com.
asking difficult questions about God. People of Written by Dale and Juanita Ryan, copyright 1991, taken from their
book Rooted In God’s Love.
23
I have thought that was cool? I hope I would have January 27
had the maturity and trust in God to let my son have
his own journey. Honestly, I’m glad I didn’t have to Scripture reading for today: Exodus 4 – 6
find out how mature I am.
In the book of Exodus, we’re going to read about Most of us know all about Moses. Epic movies
the trials and tribulations of a big family system have been made about this guy who is famous for
(You’re going to love it!). Families are messy things. setting the Israelites free. Oppressed, helpless, and
Children raised in staunchly Republican families turn hopeless, enslaved in Egypt—the Israelites were in a
into Democrats. Hippies end up birthing Wall Street big mess. Along came Moses (also famous because
tycoons. This kind of wild family stuff started with of his adoption by an Egyptian princess) and saves
Adam and Eve and is still happening in our families his people in very dramatic fashion.
today. Lots of problems pop up in all families. His story is great for children’s Bible studies. It’s
Here’s something else that happens in families. In dramatic, and the ending is a killer. When my
healthy families, parents know that problems are children were little, I struggled with how much to tell
normal and they work toward solving the problems. them about Moses. His adoption and his amazing
They acknowledge the discomfort they feel when leadership of his people—those were no‐brainers—
their kid tells them they’re reading a book that great inspiring stories for my children to hear.
claims that God is for the weak and not for real. In But do I leave out the part about Moses murdering
healthy families, parents have learned to deal with someone? What about Exodus 4, when Moses tries
their own emotions and can therefore be available to get out of God’s big dream for him? Does a
when their children are emotional. Healthy families mother really want her children to know that there
adapt to the developmental needs of their children. have been people, like Moses, who have dared to
(Fifteen is an appropriate age to explore one’s argue with God?
beliefs; I probably wouldn’t offer my seven‐year‐old In the end, I decided that honesty was the best
a book on hedonism.) Healthy families seek the policy, and my children got the unedited version of
truth. the life of Moses. Parts of it are still points of
Dysfunctional families see the world a little discussion at our house.
differently. Instead of being solution‐centered, Truthfully, some of the messy parts of Moses’
they’re into appearance management. Instead of story have become my favorites. For example, God
nurturing their babies, parents want their children to “became angry with Moses” when Moses whined
meet their needs by performing well and not and complained and tried to duck out of his
blowing the family’s cover. Guidance is missing in responsibility to lead his people. I love that story. I
unhealthy families. Parents either overreact or love that Moses was honest, God got mad but didn’t
under‐respond—in a wildly chaotic fashion. get mean, and that God and Moses had a
Dysfunctional families teach shame. conversation (not just a “God said it, so I better do
it” kind of compliance). What I really really love is
Thought for today: What kind of family were you this: Even though Moses was a real pain, God still
born into? No problem is ever solved by pretending used Him in a grand way, and even provided special
it doesn’t exist. If you were raised in a toxic family, assistance to Moses to allay Moses’ fears. It’s true,
step one is a great place to acknowledge your Moses was a very insecure leader. But lead he did.
powerlessness over your family of origin. Moses was able to lead not because he was perfect,
but because God had the power to make it happen.
Thought for tomorrow: As God’s messenger I give Maybe you’re trying to be perfect at something.
each of you this warning: Be honest in your estimate Maybe the something you’re trying to accomplish is
of yourselves…Romans 12:3 NLB big and grand and even a “God thing.” Perhaps your
anxiety is rising as reality sets in; you’ve got a big
task and a small ability to make it happen. That’s a
good thing. That’s honest and even realistic. All of
God’s big dreams for us are completely unattainable
24
if they are independent of God himself. So if today is times, what is still to come. I say: My purpose will
one of those whining, fearful days when you are stand, and I will do all that I please. Isaiah 46:9‐10
pretty sure you cannot and will not, then welcome NIV
to step one!
January 29
Thought for today: I love knowing that I can do
anything God gives me to do as long as I am clear on Scripture reading for today: Exodus 12 – 13
my part in the story. I know that apart from Him, I
can do nothing. But with Him, all things are possible. Today’s reading is about right remembering.
Because God is our Creator, He knows exactly how
Thought for tomorrow: I can do everything through our brains work. The smallest neuron does not
him (Christ) who gives me strength. Philippians 4:13 escape the attention of God.
NIV He knows we are a people who are prone to
forget. In an effort to help His people with the hard
Apart from me, you can do nothing. {Jesus} John task of right remembering, He provides some
15:5 NIV instructions that should help this community
remember what has happened to them. What is it
January 28 exactly that God wants them to take away from this
experience?
Scripture reading for today: Exodus 7 – 11 Does He ask them to remember that He is a God
that can turn a stick into a serpent? No.
Today’s reading seems like a lot of chapters, but Does He ask them to remember that He is a God
you will zip right through it. Sometimes I can’t help that can turn a river into a stinky river of blood that
but think, Why was Pharaoh such a hard‐head? kills the wildlife residing in the Nile? No.
Pharaoh was presented a solution: let God’s people Does He ask them to remember that He can cause
go, and life will go on as normal. Fail to comply, and frogs to swarm an entire land? No.
trouble will abound. Does He ask them to remember that He can pester
“Pharaoh’s heart, however, remained hard; He still them with gnats? No.
refused to listen, just as the Lord had predicted.” Does He ask them to remember that He can
Exodus 7:13 NLT plague them with flies? No.
And so—plagues of blood, frogs, gnats, flies, How about the livestock incident? Does He want
livestock, boils, hail, locusts, darkness, and finally, them to remember that He can kill the country’s
the death of Egypt’s firstborn—rained down on livestock in a flash? No.
Pharaoh. Once Pharaoh relented, “Pharaoh and his Fresh boils break out on people and animals; is
officials changed their minds” (14:5), which that what God wants them to remember He can
inevitably led to death at the Red Sea. create? No.
How easy it is to mock Pharaoh. What an oaf! How Does God want them to remember the hail storm
could he be so stupid? Doesn’t he know that God’s that was more devastating than any in all the history
purpose always prevails? Who would be so foolish as of Egypt? No.
to go up against Creator God himself? What about the locusts? No.
The darkness? No.
Thought for today: Take a few minutes and dare to The death of Egypt’s firstborn? No, not even that.
compare your life to that of Pharaoh. What forms "And in the future, your children will ask you,
have your personal plagues taken? 'What does all this mean?' Then you will tell them,
'With mighty power the LORD brought us out of
Thought for tomorrow: Remember the former Egypt from our slavery. …It is a visible reminder that
things, those of long ago; I am God, and there is no it was the LORD who brought you out of Egypt with
other; I am God, and there is none like me. I make great power." Exodus 13:14, 16 NLT
known the end from the beginning, from ancient
25
Thought for today: Make today a day when you awhile. Then I’d get used to it. It’s the transition that
remember rightly. The plagues are so easy to would be difficult.
identify, and they make for great storytelling. But That’s how it was for the Israelites. Suffering in
God has asked that we remember well and true. Egypt, anything seemed like a blessing. But it wasn’t
Look today for His hand. Look for His mighty hand. long before “…the people complained and turned
Look for the ways He has extended His hand in an against Moses.” (15:24)
effort to bring you out of your personal bondage. I wonder if the transition stage from trying to be
God (in control) to becoming imitators of God
Thought for tomorrow: So Christ has really set us (willing to dance with Him and do his will) is what’s
free. Now make sure that you stay free, and don’t tripping us up with the first step.
get tied up again in slavery to the law.” Galatians Transitions are tough. Your brain is in the business
5:1 NLT of asking you to keep things “normal”—whatever
that means for you today. How good is your “good
I don’t know where you are on your journey of faith, enough”? Take some time today to reflect on the
but God’s word teaches us that when the son of God things in your life that you accept as normal. Ask
sets us free, we are free indeed. This may make yourself: Is this the abundant life?
absolutely no sense to you today. But know this: the
moment you admit who you are—powerless—and Thought for today: We were created for an
acknowledge who God is—power‐filled—you move abundant life. We were destined to be reasonably
closer to your freedom potential. Sometimes we happy in this life and supremely happy with God in
have the capacity for freedom before we grasp how the next life. That’s our destiny. But if we choose to
to actually live it out. create our own little world of “normal” without
regard to God’s intentions for us, we may miss out
January 30 on the abundant life He has for us.

Scripture reading for today: Exodus 14 – 15 and Thought for tomorrow:
Zephaniah God, grant me the serenity
To accept the things I cannot change,
When my husband and I were first married, we the courage to change the things I can,
had one car. It was a Plymouth Valiant, and it had a and the wisdom to know the difference.
few…issues. It wasn’t air conditioned, and the heat Living one day at a time,
worked sporadically at best (usually only when the enjoying one moment at a time;
engine overheated). When you hit the brakes, you accepting hardship as a pathway to peace;
had to remember to jerk the wheel to the right or taking, as Jesus did, this sinful world as it is;
you’d end up in oncoming traffic. There was a nifty not as I would have it;
hole in the floorboard, which made for a nice view of trusting that you will make all things right
the road beneath your feet. What a wreck! But it got if I surrender to your will;
us from point A to B, and we were grateful. so that I may be reasonably happy in this life
Times have changed, and with almost 30 years of and supremely happy with You forever in the next.
marriage behind us, our cars have improved with Amen
age. In fact, when I have to drive the car that doesn’t Reinhold Niebuhr
have the heated‐seat feature, I feel slightly annoyed.
No one likes to ride in the car that has the CD January 31
changer under the front seat. We prefer the vehicle
that has the dashboard model. Scripture reading for today: Psalm 119
Our brains adapt to the situation around us, and
that becomes our “normal.” If you asked me to go We’ve had a month together, thinking and reading
back to the days of driving a Valiant, I’d hate it…for and praying about our powerless, unmanageable
lives. Some days we’ve felt discouraged; I pray that
26
there have also been days when a ray of hopeful STEP 2 We came to believe that a power greater
light peaked through the clouds of despair. I know than ourselves could restore us to sanity.
you’re under pressure. I suspect those charge cards
are coming in from Christmas – rebuking us of our February 1
over‐indulgences. Funny how that works – the same
little voice in our head that said, “Go ahead! Get it! Scripture reading for today: Exodus 16 ‐ 18
You deserve it!” is the same voice that condemns,
“How could you have been so irresponsible, Have you ever wished that God would make
gluttonous, and foolish?” himself perfectly clear to you? In today’s reading,
All of us are under pressure of some kind. True that is exactly what He does for the Israelites. He
foolishness is believing that while living on planet makes himself perfectly clear. Why did He do this?
earth we will ever find perfect peace. Was it a reward for perfect behaving? No!
Let’s leave this month with a reminder of what we “In the morning you will see the glory of the Lord,
might expect, if we choose to continue to walk this because he has heard your complaints, which are
path – using the Christ‐centered twelve steps as a against him…” Exodus 16:7 NLT
guide: you may not find perfect anything, but you As you keep reading, you will see clearly that even
will discover how to be grateful for good enough, God’s perfect revelation of Himself didn’t net him a
you may not find fame and fortune, but you will find people who perfectly believed.
freedom and fulfillment, you may not experience
relationship bliss, but you will develop the skill sets Thought for today: Most people know that a Higher
to be reasonably happy in all your relationships. Power exists—only a few believe. “Coming to
Hey, we’re not in heaven – yet. But while we’re believe” is a process. We move from giving lip
here, we can figure out WHY we are here, and join service to God’s existence to a belief that I call
God in his grand epic adventure. That’s pretty cool. “knowing that you know that you know.” Pay
attention; this is very important. You were created
Thought for today: We were under great pressure, to believe. People were not created to live in a
far beyond our ability to endure, so that we vacuum of unbelief. As the writer of Ecclesiastes
despaired even of life. Indeed, in our hearts we felt points out in chapter 3, verses 10 and 1, this belief is
the sentence of death. But this happened that we a messy, complex thing. That’s why coming to
might not rely on ourselves but on God, who raises believe is such a process! Unless we grapple with the
the dead. 2 Corinthians 1:8‐9 existence of the unseen world, it is my firmly held
conviction that we cannot live well in the seen
Thought for tomorrow: I double dog dare you. Take world. Most of us have been cheated out of our
the plunge. Go to the next step….If God can raise belief and the abundant life (see John 10:10) that
Lazarus from the dead, he can revive your life too! accompanies radical believing. Our past has left
many of us hurt and damaged. We’re in bondage to
a lot of lies: misuse of religion, cultic experiences,
and traditions of man that run counter to God’s
truths. These harmful exposures leave us scarred.
Now is the time to do three things:
1. Figure out what you truly believe.
2. See if your belief is false or true.
3. Decide to believe that which is true.
This is not an easy process, but you were created
for this. Don’t allow the junk in your trunk to hold
you back from your true God‐created self! At this
stage, coming to believe is fairly simple. Simply get

27
honest. Get to know what you believe about God. Thought for today: It’s time to wake up and smell
Practice believing. 8 the coffee! Read the ENTIRE book of Exodus.
Remember the first three chapters of Genesis. Do
Thought for tomorrow: Jesus answered, “The work we really think that our all‐knowing, all‐powerful, all‐
God wants you to do is this: Believe the One he sent.” loving, Creator God thought He could hand us a
John 6:29 New Century Version tablet with ten do’s and don’ts and expect us to
Jesus did many other miraculous signs in the behave? Even a middle‐aged Bible study teacher of
presence of his disciples, which are not recorded in tenth graders knows better than that. There’s more
this book. But these are written that you may going on here than behaving. God is asking us to
believe that Jesus is the Christ the Son of God, and believe!
that by believing you may have life in His name.
John 20:30‐31 NIV, emphasis mine Thought for tomorrow: “For my Father’s will is that
everyone who looks to the Son and believes in Him
February 2 shall have eternal life.” John 6:40 NIV

Scripture reading for today: Exodus 19 – 20; Psalm More on that eternal life stuff tomorrow.
99
February 3
I get it. I don’t get it all, but I get this: We’re a
people who confuse “coming to believe” with Scripture reading for today: Exodus 21 – 23
learning how to behave. Why? Consider Exodus.
Moses gets amazing quality time with God and My husband gets nervous when I make statements
comes down from that mountaintop experience with that seem to minimize our responsibility to behave.
a tablet of ten do’s and don’ts. This sounds like He’s right. Although I stand by my statement from
behaving to me! yesterday’s devotion, I do think God is more
I have spent a huge chunk of my adult life teaching concerned with our “coming to believe” than He is
adolescents. Lessons about behaving are the easy with our perfectionistic behaving. God does care
ones. Do this; don’t do that. Date only believers, about how we live. How we behave is a great
don’t have premarital sex, don’t throw candy in indicator of what we believe. Did you get that? God
class, don’t drink, don’t drug, and for Pete’s sake— cares about how we behave. Exodus provides plenty
always be nice to your mother. These are the easy of instruction on how the Israelites were expected to
lessons. These are the lessons that you can drag out behave.
from Exodus 20 and point to with a shaky finger of God also provides them with some incentive for
certainty. Add a tiny bit of over‐confidence to the good behaving. He tells the Israelites that if they
mix, and you can begin interpreting how this behave according to his decrees, “I will bless you
behavior is supposed to look in the lives of those you with food and water, and I will protect you from
teach. You can tell them that good Christians wear a illness. There will be no miscarriages or infertility in
certain kind of clothes, have a well‐groomed your land, and I will give you long, full lives.” (Exodus
appearance (defined by parents), and indicate in 23:26)
both stated and non‐verbal communications that the Last summer a friend of mine died of a very painful
really good kids are the ones who show up on disease. I appreciated the times we spent together in
Sundays, raise their hands, and answer the questions those last days. One of her greatest fears was that
asked—without double entendres, without sarcasm, her disease was the consequence for her bad
without “attitude.” That’s the easy way. I have behaving. Raised in a religious home, she had been
“come to believe” that it is not God’s way. taught that her behaving would either bring blessing
or curse. At death’s door, she had trouble focusing
on anything but her bad behaving and the fear of
condemnation that those thoughts stirred.
8
The Christ-Centered 12 Step Study Guide: Step 2, A NorthStar
Community Publication, copyright 2005, p. 9.
28
Again, I understand when we’re reading through Scripture reading for today: Exodus 24 – 31. This
Exodus why someone might come to that may seem like a lot, but it’s not that bad; just do it!
conclusion. And frankly, it’s a neat, easy, satisfying
perspective. All we have to do for a full life is to I hope you’ve read all those chapters in Exodus,
behave according to God’s decrees. because I want you to notice something about them.
However, that is not the full story. It does not take All that attention to the rituals of worship did not
into account thousands of years of historical data. guarantee that God’s people would worship God.
The data I am suggesting we study is the behavior of Our rituals have never protected us from ourselves.
God. God has consistently revealed through his (For more details than this small devotion can
behaving what he believes about us. provide, check out “The Circle of Shame” message
It seems He knows that we’re goofs; we are prone on www.northstarcommunity.com)
to grow forgetful of him, and our intentions are
sometimes pure evil. He gives us one little “do not” We all have rituals, and some of them are very
in the Garden of Eden, and look what we “do.” It is a dangerous. Let me give you some examples:
given that we are a people with a history of bad • What about when we overindulge in pizza,
behaving. But here’s the thing about God: His pastries, and pop, and then hit the gym for three
response to us has been to love us. hours of compulsive over‐exercising? Instead of
Once I convinced my friend that our work was to getting serious about being healthy, we’re trying to
believe, we spent her last days thinking more about find a ritual to ameliorate the effects of our bad
the God she was about to see than about her behaving.
behaving. We read stories about the many, many • What about when we are getting ready for the
times he responded to our faithlessness with loving neighborhood Super Bowl Party and we swear to our
compassion. We didn’t skip the stories of goofy, bad spouse that this year we’re not going to stand by the
behaving on the part of God’s people, nor did we beer keg and overindulge, only to find ourselves
spend too much time discussing why people act like three hours later standing next to the keg and saying
this. We just accepted the truth of it, and read on to things that we’re really going to regret tomorrow?
the part in the story where we saw how God loved Instead of acknowledging our powerlessness over
them. I hope as you read through scripture this year our drinking and our propensity to hurt others with
that you will remind yourself to be at least as our unhinged tongues, we’re trying to find a plan
concerned about your believing as you are about that will enable us to do what we want without any
your behaving. negative consequences.
• What about when we’re standing over our
Thought for today: One last thought. Perhaps today sleeping, angelic child and promising ourselves that
you are overwhelmed with your life. It’s a mess and we’re never ever going to call them “stupid” again?
it seems like there’s no good way to untangle all Promising to “never do it again” never leads us to
those webs of deceit. I want to ask you to calm down answers about why we did it in the first place, nor
and take a deep breath. Instead of rushing to fix a does it lead us to solutions and new ways to handle
problem that you’re completely powerless over, take our parenting responsibilities.
time today to begin considering who God is. Relax These are three examples of rituals that we hope
about what that means for your behavior. For this will save us:
month, while we’re on step two, just focus on the 1. Try to take a “bad” and trump it with a “good”
character of this God that you’re coming to believe (fitness for fat).
in. 2. Recognize a negative consequence and
negotiate a plan for “controlling” the damage
Thought for tomorrow: I have come that they may (drink with rules).
have life, and have it to the full. John 10:10 NIV 3. Remorse without repentance (“I’m sorry” versus
“I’m wrong”).
February 4 These rituals aren’t working for us. The Israelites
were not made more holy with their ritualized
29
offerings, their fancy ark of the covenant, the plans who brought us here from the land of Egypt.”
for a decorated interior, the amazing courtyard, the (Exodus 32:1 NLT)
priests’ special clothes, the washbasins, the oils, the How could they? In just seven chapters‐‐‐how
money, the incense or even the craftsmen. quickly they forgot! Consider this one for a moment.
I hope you’re feeling empathy, because just last
Thought for today: Sometimes our rituals are night I was asking myself, “How could I?” I just know
religious in nature, and we use them in hopes of that if you’re honest, you can relate to the Israelites
atonement. But here’s the deal. “Coming to believe” and to me.
is not about rituals; it’s about relationship. Our Our intentions are sincerely good. Our follow
rituals are sometimes comforting in the moment, through is, well, pathetic. Sometimes I get confused
but they offer no guarantee that we’re going to be and think being forgetful means I don’t believe. I’m
saved from our compulsions. What kind of rituals glad I have friends who remind me that forgetfulness
have you counted on for comfort? For cure? Is it of God and inadequate follow‐through does not
possible that you’ve confused ritual with belief? Are equal unbelief. It makes us human.
you religious without relationship? “Coming to
believe” is just that—a process. It’s okay to admit to Thought for today: Sometimes our shame becomes
ourselves that our believing has been more ritualized an excuse for quitting. My friend, Mike Thompson, is
than real. It’s a good place to start. always encouraging me not to give up five minutes
before my miracle. He’s got it right. “Coming to
Thought for tomorrow: “If you hold to my teachings, believe” can help us understand that there is a God,
you are really my disciples. Then you will know the and we are not Him. So let’s set our shame aside and
truth, and the truth will set you free.” John 8:31‐32 just acknowledge the truth; we’re human. But that’s
NIV not the key truth. The key truth is that God is God.
Let’s spend this month focusing on that!
God knows these things about us and is not shocked.
The truth for me is this: I imperfectly hold to the Thought for tomorrow: . . . for it is God who works in
teachings of Jesus. That’s the truth. But what does you to will and to act according to his good purpose.
that mean? Does it mean I’m not a disciple? “Coming Philippians 2:13 NIV
to believe” is a process that allows us to ask these
tough questions. An effective step two does not We can get off our high horses and acknowledge this
require us to have the answers, it is giving us an true belief: God will do the work in us and God will
opportunity to be honest about our current state of enable us to act according to his good purpose. If we
belief. will but believe, we can do all things through Christ
who gives us strength. Not because we are able, but
February 5 because He is!

Scripture reading for today: Exodus 32; Psalm 100 February 6
and 101
Scripture reading for today: Exodus 33; Psalm 102
Think back to chapter 24, when the people and 103
responded to the Lord’s covenant with, “We will do
everything the Lord commanded.” (Exodus 24:3 NLT) “…But I will not travel among you, for you are a
and “We will do everything the Lord has stubborn and rebellious people. If I did, I would surely
commanded. We will obey.” (Exodus 24:7 NLT) destroy you along the way.” When the people heard
Fast forward to chapter 32. “When the people saw these stern words, they went into mourning and
how long it was taking Moses to come back down stopped wearing their jewelry and fine clothes. For
the mountain, they gathered around Aaron. “Come the Lord had told Moses to tell them, “You are a
on,” they said, “make us some gods who can lead us. stubborn and rebellious people…” Exodus 33:3‐5 NLT
We don’t know what happened to this fellow Moses,
30
Wrapped in those few verses is an awesome, February 7
succinct explanation of why step one precedes step
two. Unless and until we realize that something with Scripture reading for today: Exodus 34; Psalm 104
us is “not quite right” and “not quite working,” we and 105
simply will not give God our full attention. I like to
begin my mornings by reviewing step one before I Therefore, since we have such a hope, we are very
rush on to step two and following. It’s a funny thing, bold. We are not like Moses, who would put a veil
though; step one always seems to find meaningful over his face to keep the Israelites from gazing at it
application every single day. while the radiance was fading away. 2 Corinthians
The Israelites had a step‐one experience, but 3:12‐13 NIV
obviously, more stepping was needed. Of all the What a strange story! At first, Moses doesn’t
people traveling on this desert journey, Moses had realize that time with God has actually given him a
the closest contact with God. Continue reading in radiance that is so glorious it is frightening. After he
Exodus 33, and notice how Moses struggled with gets it, he begins this strange ritual of taking on and
“coming to believe.” tearing off the veil. I’m not sure what to think of this
You keep telling me…but you haven’t told me…” story as I read through Exodus 34. Does he do this
The Lord replies and assures Moses. because he doesn’t want to startle his people? Is he
Moses doubts the Lord. “If you don’t…how will…” humbled by the experience, and afraid that
The Lord replies with more reassurance. someone will confuse bestowed glory (a gift from
Moses demands proof. “Then show me...” God) with intrinsic glory (something Moses can take
The Lord does as Moses asks. credit for)? What’s up with Moses?
Folks, this is not perfect believing; this is the messy The writer of 2 Corinthians says that it’s all about
reality of “coming to believe.” This is the true, up‐ pride. Drawing near to God and being given the gift
close‐and‐personal view of “coming to believe”—not of glory is contingent upon continual, close contact
some fairy‐tale story of perfect believing, flawless with God Himself. Evidently, Moses’ glow is like a
behaving, and unrestrained blessing (without any facial or BOTOX®‐‐you look great for a while, but
bad stuff happening) that we sometimes fantasize eventually the real, wrinkly you always reappears.
about. Moses liked the glow and intended to keep its
“Coming to believe” may be something you appearance up for as long as possible. This is a
struggle with—not because you’re failing at it—but danger of the “coming to believe” process. “Coming
simply because you don’t recognize it when it to believe” is a glorious experience, and we often
happens! find ourselves—quite surprisingly at first—with a
real, glorious glow after a close encounter with Holy
Thought for today: Would you be willing to set aside God.
your preconceived notions about what it means to But let’s not get confused. “Coming to believe”
believe long enough to simply enter the process? isn’t a once‐and done‐experience. It’s a process. It’s
(For a closer look at the wild and mysterious ways of a choice. It’s a decision.
“coming to believe,” check out the article at
www.northstarcommunity.com about a young artist Thought for today: I think Moses’ desire to hide the
in a family of atheists who became a believer.) fading of the glow is something we can all relate to.
Our moments of clarity and our jolts of joy are all
Thought for tomorrow: For God is working in you, great experiences that we love to share. I’m trying to
giving you the desire and the power to do what remember Moses. The glow wore off, and the
pleases him. Philippians 2:13 NLT wrinkles were revealed; so what? Moses was still
God’s work does not hinge upon your belief. God is Moses; He was still treasured by God. I’m thankful
and God will—because He’s God—not because you that I have an opportunity to learn from Moses.
believe “rightly.” “Coming to believe” isn’t about continual BOTOX®‐‐
it’s also about being honest about who we are and
learning to trust God with the outcome.
31
fire metaphor is dramatic for sure. But our God has
Thought for tomorrow: But whenever someone always promised us His presence, His mind, His
turns to the Lord, the veil is taken away. For the Lord guidance, His love, His beneficent purposes, and His
is the Spirit, and wherever the spirit of the Lord is, plans for us. He’s told us quite plainly—as clear as
there is freedom. So all of us who have had that veil any cloud and as hot with passion as any fire—that if
removed can see and reflect the glory of the Lord. we seek Him, we will find Him.
And the Lord – who is the Spirit – makes us more and So are you seeking Him? Is this seeking
more like him as we are changed into his glorious relationship driven or ritual focused? Are you seeking
image. 2 Corinthians 16‐18 NLT Him because He’s God and worthy of our worship, or
Not that we are competent in ourselves to claim so that you can get His blessing on your own
anything for ourselves, but our competence comes personal agenda? Do you count it a privilege to peer
from God. 2 Corinthians 3:5 NIV intently into His word, or is it a chore? We’ve been
We are a people of extremes: we believe we can given some mighty, powerful promises. I just wonder
do anything, or we doubt we can do a single thing. how seriously we take the privilege of His presence.
The truth is, we can do only those things that God
has purposed to do in and through and with us. Our Thought for today: Trust in the Lord with all your
part is to surrender to the truth of that and allow heart; do not depend on your own understanding.
Him to have His way with us. Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which
path to take. Don’t be impressed with your own
February 8 wisdom. Instead, fear the Lord and turn away from
evil. Then you will have healing for your body and
Scripture reading for today: Exodus 35 ‐ 40 strength for your bones. Proverbs 3:5‐8 NLT
“Coming to believe” does not mean that we
“Then the cloud covered the Tabernacle, and the understand how to trust God with a whole heart. I
glory of the Lord filled the Tabernacle….Now am in the process of trying to figure out if I regularly
whenever the cloud lifted from the Tabernacle, the seek His will or merely ask Him to bless mine. That’s
people of Israel would set out on their journey, the nature of “coming to believe;” it’s messy, and
following it. But if the cloud did not rise, they questions outnumber answers. But take heart. God
remained where they were until it lifted. The cloud of does not expect us to know how to perfectly follow
the Lord hovered over the Tabernacle during the day, Him. He does ask us to practice believing.
and at night fire glowed inside the cloud so the
whole family of Israel could see it. This continued Thought for tomorrow: O Lord, our Lord, how
through out all their journeys.” Exodus 40:34, 36‐38 majestic is your name in all the earth! You have set
NLT your glory above the heavens. From the lips of
children and infants you have ordained praise
Just give me the cloud! I’ll take the fire! How great because of your enemies, to silence the foe and the
would it be if “all” we had to do was get up, get avenger. When I consider your heavens, the work of
dressed and follow the very visible, totally‐not‐ your fingers, the moon and the stars, which you have
subtle presence of God himself? set in place, what is man that you are mindful of him,
Someone asked me recently if God “updated his the son of man that you care for him? …The Lord is a
methods.” I’m not sure I understand the question, refuge for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of
but what if He did? Instead of all those clouds and trouble. Those who know your name will trust in you,
fires hanging around our houses, wouldn’t it be for you, Lord, have never forsaken those who seek
more efficient if God just text‐messaged us? What you. Psalm 8:1‐4, 9:9‐10 NIV
about email; would that get our attention? Would It’s natural to assume that the world rotates
we follow diligently and trustingly after a God who around us. We are, after all, our own central point of
regularly paged us? reference for all that we know and experience. Step
I’m not a big fan of fussing at people. But I feel the two allows us to consider a different perspective: we
need to lecture for just a moment. The cloud‐and‐ are not the center of the universe. The world does
32
not depend on us to fulfill its daily rotation. But be called His kid. We’re not a people who have to
there is One for whom that is true – and He is the pine away on planet earth until the day we get
kind of God that will never forsake you. So in a way, sucked up to heaven. That’s not how it works.
we are very special. God knows our names and cares So this “power greater than ourselves” is
about us. But that caring concern has more to do interested in relationship with us. One thing we can
with His nature than our deserving it. “Coming to know about God is this: He is interested in
believe” changes everything we have assumed we relationship with us.
knew about ourselves, our world, and our place in
the story. Thought for today: “Here I am! I stand at the door
and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the
February 9 door, I will come in and eat with him, and he with
me.” Revelation 3:20 NIV
Scripture reading for today: Ruth 1 – 4
Thought for tomorrow: I realize that many of us
One of the things that helps me “come to believe” have lost faith that there is a man or God who really
is continuing to address the question: who is this cares about us. Guess what? If we believe that, then
“power greater than ourselves?” (For further study, we are wrong. Step one prodded and poked at us,
consider obtaining our “Finding Our Way Back to suggesting that our way of looking at the world is…
God” four‐part series. Look for “Insight”, our “not quite right.” No one wants to admit such a
quarterly journals on the web to access this series.) thing, but if the shoe fits, wear it. If your way of
For a few years I studied scripture through the believing has led to anything less than an abundant
squinty eyes of barely believing. Predisposed to be a life (see John 10:10), then perhaps today is a good
person of small faith, I found myself with no day to re‐evaluate your way of believing.
confidence in the theory that we had all managed to
crawl out of the goo of primordial soup and morph February 10
into something better than the tadpoles we
supposedly sprang from. It took much less faith to Scripture reading for today: Acts 1 – 2; Psalm 106
believe that a great, powerful, other‐worldly force
had chosen to create us and our world. Armed with Yesterday’s devotional focused on one truth about
such small faith, I read scripture with a critical eye. I God: He desires relationship with us. Once I realized
was always looking for loopholes that would confirm this about Him, I began to ask other questions. One
my suspicions that any God with that much power question that I still find myself exploring is: Who is
certainly wouldn’t care to be known by me. Why this God who desires to be known by me? This is a
would he reveal himself to me? Oh sure, I believed big‐deal question. If there is a God, and He’s as
He existed; I simply didn’t believe He wanted to be powerful as scripture says, then I want to know his
known by a messy mortal like me. What I discovered intentions towards me. All that power unleashed can
was that I was….gulp….wrong. be scary, dangerous, and potentially painful.
Make this tabernacle and all its furnishings exactly He peeked out from under a shaggy mass of
like the pattern I will show you. Exodus 25:9 NIV unruly, curly hair. His arms were crossed, and his
They serve at a sanctuary that is a copy and short little legs swung back and forth in a wide arc
shadow of what is in heaven. This is why Moses was that dared the coach to take one step closer.
warned when he was about to build the tabernacle: “I don’t want to.”
“See to it that you make everything according to the “But Justin, this is our big day. We’ve been
pattern shown you on the mountain.” Hebrews 8:5 practicing and practicing for this, don’t you want to
NIV join your team out on the court?” My husband,
Wow! Imagine that – a God who brings heaven to Coach McBean, was working hard to get this tiny tike
earth. This is fantastic news! This is a God who interested in taking his place on the court. He was a
comes to us, not requiring massive efforts of self good little player, and if the team was to have a
help in a vain attempt to become “good enough” to
33
chance at victory, McBean needed this kid’s leave Justin confused, angry, broken, and lost. It’s
participation. going to be tough for Justin to believe that there is a
“No. I won’t do it.” “power” that has Justin’s best interests in mind.
“Okay, son. Let me know if you feel ready to play.”
The game ended in a not‐so‐stunning, rather Thought for today: What kind of transfer did your
predictable defeat for McBean and his team. But this family of origin make? What kind of transfer are you
was not the focus of the coach’s concern. What making in the lives of your children?
bothered him was Justin. Why wouldn’t he play?
This kid was a real fire plug in practice. Whether on Thought for tomorrow: It’s in Christ that we find out
offense or defense, this guy had game. After the who we are and what we are living for. Long before
coach’s pep talk, he walked over to Justin, patted we first heard of Christ and got our hopes up, he had
him on the shoulder and said, “See you at practice.” his eye on us, had designs on us for glorious living,
Perhaps Justin missed it. As the coach’s wife, I did part of the overall purpose he is working out in
not. That statement was loaded with questions. Why everything and everyone. Ephesians 1:11‐12 The
didn’t Justin want to play? Had Coach done Message
something wrong? Was Justin not feeling well? What I don’t know what kind of “transfer” was made in
was the problem that was in so obvious need of a your house. What I do know is that if we’ve taken
solution? The answer was quickly revealed. our first step, we can now take the second. We can
Trudging out to the parking lot, head down, admit that not only are we powerless and our lives
Justin’s dad (whom we had never met nor seen at are unmanageable, but we can explore who this
practice) was giving Justin an earful. “I know why “Power” is that wants an abundant life for us. He
that coach didn’t play you. I bet you’re lousy. I may be a far different God than our “transfer” has
always knew you were stupid. I didn’t know you led us to believe.
were lazy too. Didn’t I tell you to practice more? All
those kids on the court—not a one of them could February 11
play—and you’re worse than them? It’s why I’m
always asking your mother: is Justin my kid, or did Scripture reading for today: Acts 3 – 4; Psalm 107
they switch the babies at the hospital?” Sometimes
it’s the parents that make coaching so difficult. Yesterday we had an opportunity to begin reading
Dads have a tremendous amount of power. Some the book of Acts. Many theologians believe that Luke
dads abuse this power. So do moms. Frankly, the wrote both the gospel of Luke and this book, which
first place we experience the use and abuse of is a writing that illustrates how the life of Jesus was
power is in our homes. Lots of what we believe lived out in the life of his disciples. Looking back at
about God is “transfer.” “Transfer” is a term they yesterday’s example, what we’re going to be reading
use on crime shows (CSI in particular); it describes about today is “transfer.”
how a perpetrator always leaves a piece of self at Acts shows us the “transfer” that took place in the
the crime scene, and usually takes away some crime relationship Jesus had with his disciples. One of
scene on self. Justin is experiencing “transfer.” Dad those important “transfers” was power.
is teaching Justin that power is abused and a host of He (Jesus) replied, “The Father alone has the
other painful untruths about power sources, Justin, authority to set those dates and times (the disciples
and the world. This dad is a perpetrator who is had been questioning Jesus about when a certain
abusing his power. event was going to occur), and they are not for you
Maybe that’s why we want to know who this to know. But you will receive power when the Holy
“power” is and what his intentions are toward us. Spirit comes upon you. And you will be my witnesses,
God created families for the purpose of “transfer” telling people about me everywhere – in Jerusalem,
(see Deuteronomy 6). Parents are supposed to throughout Judea, in Samaria, and to the ends of the
“transfer” to their children the truth about who God earth.” Acts 1:7‐8 NLT
is and what his intentions are for his created beings. As we “come to believe” in this “Power greater
Justin’s family is making a “transfer” that is going to than ourselves,” we realize that there are many
34
questions that will go unanswered. This is a tough Speaking of “transfer” (see the previous two days’
truth. We want answers, don’t we? devotional to understand this phrase), check out
We also receive instructions. There is something Peter in chapter 3 of Acts. Remember that when last
we’re supposed to go and do. We are given the we left Peter, he was being a big goof. Although
power to accomplish the task set before us. Again, I promising Jesus (and sincerely meaning it) that he
return to a question: Who is this power source that would never leave him nor forsake him, Peter denies
has such big plans for me? “Coming to believe” that he knows Jesus—not once, not twice, but three
compels me to get to know this God who is times. After Jesus’ death and resurrection (but prior
sometimes so beyond my limited, human to his ascension back into the heavens) Jesus and
understanding. Peter have a little meeting (see John 21.) We’re left
with mixed emotions as we read how Jesus
Thought for today: I want to ask you to consider the questions Peter. The reader is left with the
implications of what we read in scripture. I want us impression that Jesus is trying to communicate more
to become a people who not only hear His word, but truth to Peter than Peter can receive at that
study it. We think about it. We consider its moment. Maybe it’s just me, but I’m left with the
implications for ourselves and for others. We force distinct sense that Peter is still a big goof.
ourselves to be honest about the incongruence we But praise be to God! Even big goofs are provided
see in our lives versus God’s intended life for us. the opportunity to participate in God’s grand, epic
Think. Think about the process of “transfer.” adventure. Part of Peter’s problem in the gospels is
Acknowledge the truth that some of us have had an the same one we have; we want God to be the god
inadequate “transfer” (see Justin’s story in (notice the lower‐case “g”) of our understanding and
yesterday’s devotional) and we need to rethink what we don’t want anyone clarifying our understanding!
we believe. We can only experience God as we understand Him.
If our understanding is “not quite right,” it will be
Thought for tomorrow: …I have carried you since difficult for us to recognize a God moment when we
you were born; I have taken care of you from your have one. This is a hard concept, but think about it.
birth. Even when you are old, I will be the same. Even We can only experience God as we understand Him,
when your hair has turned gray, I will take care of so we pray that he will expand our understanding!
you. I made you and will take care of you. Isaiah Evidently, he did this with Peter. In Acts 3, a lame
46:3‐4 NCV man comes to Peter and presents a perceived need;
God is in the business of taking care of us; His he needs money. Peter, “transferring” what he has
“transfer” is always good stuff. He knows what we learned from the Christ, provides him with
need because He made us (this may be far different something far more valuable; he heals him. The only
than what we want). Yucky transfer means that you experience the lame guy had was with people
and I may have mixed up our needs and our wants. helping him the only way they knew how—throwing
We may be looking for love in all the wrong places. him a few coins so that he might buy food and
“Coming to believe” requires us to be willing to shelter. That’s all he could conceive: help came in
change what we believe if our “transfer” proves to the form of money.
be unworthy of Him who made us. I pray that today Peter understood that God meets our needs in
the Holy Spirit will speak to you in a way that wildly unpredictable—and far grander—ways than
reaches beyond your limitations and that His we can imagine. He learned this through experience,
“transfer” will be received by a soft and tender and failure, and frustration. This wasn’t intellectual
heart—ready to be expanded and grown in new head knowledge. This was a man who had some
ways. time to reflect back on his relationship with Jesus
and perhaps had a few moments of clarity. Jesus
February 12 miraculously “transferred” key information to Peter:
God Is, and God Will. But He “will” in ways that are
Scripture reading for today: Acts 5 – 6; Psalm 108 mysterious to us. We think small, but God thinks

35
deep. We think money to ease the pain. God thinks grace and power, performing amazing miracles and
ease the pain by healing the wound. signs among the people.” Sometimes our “sins”
seem to go unnoticed. Other times it seems like the
Thought for today: I wonder what small things boom gets lowered quite fiercely.
you’ve been asking for instead of the thing that God I don’t know what to make of all these stories. I
wants to give you. I wonder if maybe, just maybe the can read the commentaries and even come to some
thing is right in front of you, and you’re missing it conclusions. But the truth is, God is mysterious, His
because you’re looking for the only thing you can ways are beyond our comprehension. He loves us,
understand. You want your pain eased; God wants but He also loves justice. He’s big on mercy and
your wounds healed. grace, but sometimes the dispensing of that mercy
and grace is more confusing to us than comforting
Thought for tomorrow: So do not fear, for I am with because we don’t get the big picture. “Coming to
you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will believe” requires us to let go and let God do His
strengthen and help you; I will uphold you with my thing without trying to wrestle away the reins of
righteous right hand. Isaiah 41:10 NIV control. (Hey, if this were easy, anybody could do it.)
“Coming to believe” eventually involves deciding
to trust that God is with us, that God is for us, that Thought for today: I don’t know how “coming to
God can and will strengthen and help us, that he will believe” is going to play itself out in my life, much
uphold us with his righteous right hand. He does less yours! But I know that doing it my way has
these things not because he has to, not because we consistently not worked for me. In the days ahead,
earned them, but because he desires this for us. I’m going to show you how doing it our way can be,
well, deadly.
February 13
Thought for tomorrow: I am your Creator. You were
Scripture reading for today: Acts 7; Joel 1‐3 in my care even before you were born. Isaiah 44:2a
Contemporary English Version
Stephen, a man full of God’s grace and power,
performed amazing miracles and signs among the February 14
people. Acts 6:8 NLT
Scripture reading for today: Acts 8 – 9; Psalm 109
Today we find Stephen, filled with the Holy Spirit
and exhibiting God’s power and love (awesome I’ve got some big news coming with regard to the
“transfer” – see the previous few days’ devotions to deadliness of living life on “our” terms (that’s
get this), ultimately is run out of town and stoned insanity). But I just can’t let go of “Power greater
(no, not what you’re thinking—he was killed by than ourselves” just yet. I’ve spent days combing
people throwing rocks at him). through all my notebooks reviewing my notes on the
“You stubborn people! You are heathen at heart character of God. (I’ve got a lot of notebooks!) For
and deaf to the truth. Must you forever resist the many years, I believed that I would never be capable
Holy Spirit?” Acts 7:51 NLT of understanding scripture. Pair that false belief with
Perhaps that did him in; he spoke a hard truth, and an obsessive love for school supplies, and you end
no one wanted to hear it. It’s stories like this that up with a gal who filled up a lot of notebooks. I want
cause us to wonder about what it truly means to to include in this step‐two series every single verse
“come to believe.” If that story doesn’t scare you, I’ve ever studied on the topic of God—a power
turn back to Acts 5 and review what happened to greater than ourselves who can restore us. But
Ananias and Sapphira. It wasn’t like they didn’t give February is too short for all that sharing.
a penny to the church; they did give! They just lied This morning I’m reading the paper, and there’s an
about how much. Look where that got them! article in The Richmond Times‐Dispatch on
“Coming to believe” isn’t for sissies. Sometimes snowflakes. One thought comes to my mind: this is a
bad things happen even when we’re “full of god’s
36
God thing. So let me tell you what I learned about I had a friend in treatment who was very insulted
snowflakes. when her treatment team dared suggest that she
o Everyone knows that each snowflake is different. was insane. Today is a good day to get that truth out
But did you know that all snowflakes (snow on the table. Anytime we are not living within the
crystals in the form of plates, stars, columns, confines of our God‐created identity, we are crazy! Is
needles, barely visible prisms, triangular crystals, this an extreme perspective that needs to be toned
capped columns and even large fern‐like down? NO! Stop and think. God made each and
dendrites) are based on a symmetrical six‐sided every one of us. It’s in Christ that we find out who
figure? Snowflakes are mathematical. we are and what we’re made of (and for). See
o Experts say that a snowflake is highly intricate Ephesians 1:11 if you doubt this view (I especially
and has beautiful symmetry – even a teeny, tiny love how The Message paraphrases that passage.)
snow crystal has perfect symmetry. If we carry this thought to its conclusion, the
implication becomes crystal clear. The absolute best
o Did you know that snowflakes start out as a dust “me” I can become is the identity God custom‐
particle? selected for me. Lest we forget, this is the same God
o Did you know a million droplets must evaporate who custom designs snowflakes just for fun. So if
to provide the water vapor for a single large God is willing to create a world that births one‐of‐a‐
snow crystal? kind snow crystals, what effort must He exert when
o Did you know that many factors determine how he’s designing us? We would have to be nuts to try
a snowflake turns out? Things like the size of the to make up our own identity! Translation: We are in
dust particle, humidity levels, wind in the cloud, a state of insanity when we live independently of our
amount of water vapor the cloud holds, true God‐created identity.
temperature, speed the flake falls all affect the Today you’re going to read in Acts about Peter’s
snow crystal product. dilemma. One of the twelve disciples and a Jew by
o Did you know that our snow machines can only birth, Peter was pretty confident about how God
produce bubbles of irregular round balls of ice created him. And he was cool with that creation. He
with none of the delicate beauty of a God‐made wasn’t resisting the mantle of responsibility God
snowflake? Man can’t make snow. placed upon him. He was completely sold out to
So I’m ready to move on to other things. This is God.
enough said about God for step two. He is mighty Then he had this vision. It was a vision he didn’t
and mysterious; creative and caring; powerful and understand because the message didn’t fit with
playful. He is the kind of God who takes time to Peter’s preconceived notions about what it meant to
make a snowflake. be a follower of Jesus. His friends were confused
too. But here’s the great thing about Peter. When
Thought for today: My notebooks prove to be God spoke, he stepped. He was willing to be made
helpful when I’m trying to remember a particular willing to take a different perspective. As we march
scripture on a specific topic. But nothing compares through the twelve steps, we can expect to be blown
to the “coming to believe” in a God who makes a away. We will discover that some of our
snow crystal. preconceived notions are completely wrong. (If
that’s not happening, something is way wrong.) It
Thought for tomorrow: In the beginning, God helps if we just get over huffing and puffing and
created the heavens and the earth…God saw all that accept the truth; sometimes we are in need of a
he had made, and it was very good. sanity check.
Genesis 1:1, 31 The Message
Thought for today: One of the phrases I think we
February 15 should all practice saying every day (because it’s
true) is “I could be wrong.” To properly say this
Scripture reading for today: Acts 10 – 11; Psalm 110 phrase, you can’t sound like this is a radical idea. You

37
can’t roll your eyes. No snarling allowed. Just calmly As we keep reading we see that Herod, because of
say, “I could be wrong.” And mean it. his response to some delegates from other towns
(who were there to flatter and regain his favor), gets
Thought for tomorrow: Long before he laid down consumed with worms and dies. (If you want to see
earth’s foundations, he had us in mind, had settled what Herod did that I personally think was worthy of
on us as the focus of his love. Ephesians 1:4 The a good worm eating, you may want to read Part 3 of
Message Finding Our Way Back to God.) This guy had done a
Can you imagine that? Long before God set the lot of really bad things. Why was this the thing that
first star in the sky, he was thinking about you. was worm worthy?
It’s in Christ that we find out who we are and what So “coming to believe” is still mysterious to me.
we are living for. Long before we first heard of Christ Great miracles are mixed with enormous trials while
and got our hopes up, he had his eye on us, had mere mortals sit around and try to make sense out
designs on us for glorious living, part of the overall of the mighty workings of God. Maybe one of the
purpose he is working out in everything and best things that could happen to any of us during
everyone. Ephesians 1:11‐12 The Message this month in step two would be to stop trying to
figure out what God is up to all the time, and instead
February 16 try to figure out what it means to live out our true,
God‐created selves every moment of every day.
Scripture reading for today: Acts 12; Psalm 111‐112 Finding our way back to God is an experience not
unlike the early Christians lived—wild and
Can you believe what Acts 12 says? Amazing! As mysterious, miraculous and debilitating, delightful
much as I want to spend some time discussing the and discouraging—all rolled up in a messy stew of
issue of sanity (or the lack thereof), scripture living large.
continues to overwhelm us with the power of God.
Many miraculous experiences happened in the Thought for today: Part of the insanity in how we
early church, AND the early Christians faced all sorts live is the way we rush to make value judgments. Am
of trials and tribulations. Does that remind anyone I having a Holy Spirit moment because it makes me
else of the process of recovery? Recovery is messy – happy, or because I recognize the voice of God even
some days are good, others are yukky. We’re not in the midst of discouragement and despair? Coming
alone in this process – check out the book of Acts. to believe doesn’t promise us a pain‐free existence.
The early believers were doing a lot of things right Our level of pain doesn’t always indicate the
AND a lot of things wrong (don’t forget Ananias and “rightness” or the “wrongness” of how we’re living.
Sapphira). Peter got locked in the slammer and faced Sometimes pain is our friend, because we are trying
certain death, but God set him free. Peter couldn’t a new way that, while uncomfortable, is much more
believe that he was really free, nor could his friends “right” than our old way of living.
(all of whom had been praying for this very
freedom). Is it bad that they didn’t believe God Thought for tomorrow: The Lord is close to the
would hear their prayers and answer with Peter’s brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in
freedom? When Peter realized he was truly free, he spirit. A righteous man may have many troubles, but
scurried off to his friends’ house. When Rhoda heard the Lord delivers him from them all; he protects all
Peter’s voice, she ran to the door overjoyed. But his bones, not one of them will be broken. Evil will
instead of answering, she ran back inside and told slay the wicked; the foes of the righteous will be
everyone of Peter’s arrival. They called her crazy, condemned. The Lord redeems his servants; no one
insane, loco. They even found it easier to believe his will be condemned who takes refuge in him. Psalm
angel was at the door than Peter in the flesh. 34:18‐22 NIV
Eventually, everyone gathered their wits and
rescued Peter from the front stoop. (Read it – you’ll
love it!)

38
February 17 forget how we are formed, we can forget to take
care of such creaturely basics as sleep, decent food
Scripture reading for today: Acts 13 – 15 and relaxation. Fortunately, God does not forget
how we are formed. God remembers. God knows we
Scott Peck says, “Mental health requires the have limitations. God remembers that we are 'dust'.
willingness and the capacity to suffer self‐ Because we are so intolerant of our limits, it is
examination.” I’m thrilled to know that a piece of important to emphasize that the metaphor 'dust' in
“coming to believe” means accepting truths like, this text does not imply worthless. It is not that God
“For God is working in you, giving you the desire remembers how worthless we are ‐ just dust to be
(willing) and the power (able) to do what pleases sweep up and thrown away. Quite to the contrary,
him.” (Philippians 2:13 NLT) I’m disturbed by Peck’s God remembers our weakness and limitations and
use of the word “suffer.” has compassion on us. Again, because we are so
Anyone who has self‐examined must acknowledge intolerant of our limits, it is also probably important
Peck’s description as accurate. Seeing ourselves for to emphasize that 'compassion' is not 'pity'. God
who we really are hurts. Today I watched a does not pity us poor, pathetic, helpless mortals.
commercial that had a ring of authenticity that most Quite to the contrary, God's compassion is the
ads lack. A woman in a weight loss commercial tender, loving care of a good parent towards a child.
stated, “When I saw this picture (up flashes a terrible God knows and respects our limitations. They are
picture of her in a bikini) I knew I had to do not a surprise to God. God is our Creator. God
something. So I joined blah blah blah, and now I’ve remembers what we tend to forget. God remembers
lost 70 pounds!” That gal found herself suffering that we are creatures. 9
with painful self‐examination. What’s interesting to
me is that it took a picture to break through her February 18
denial and cause her to see herself accurately.
She had been going to great lengths NOT to notice Scripture reading for today: Acts 16 – 17; Psalm 113
her weight. When she had to buy clothes, did she
think that manufacturers were just skimping on the Our need for restoration is profound. All sorts of
sizing? Had she stopped asking her husband if she life events can lead us to conclude that maybe we’re
looked fat in this outfit (or had he wised up and losing our minds. Have you ever waited up for a child
refused to answer that question)? Pictures do long past curfew? How does it feel to discover that
communicate a powerful message – and she got someone you love has betrayed you? When life is
hers. moving along at a nice clip and your yearly physical
Acknowledging our own personal limitations is reveals a life‐threatening health condition, do you
difficult. But when we choose dishonesty over feel like you fell into a big hole and landed in a
suffering self‐examination, we lose more than just nightmare? Stressful times play havoc with our
perspective. It makes us go a little crazy. minds and bodies (more on that in a few days.)
Sometimes it doesn’t take a stressful event to
Thought for today: As a father has compassion on make me look like a nut. The other night I was trying
his children, so the Lord has compassion on those to introduce a new visitor to an old regular at
who fear him; for he knows how we are formed, he church. I’m glad the old regular has a sense of
remembers that we are dust. Psalm 103:13‐14 NIV humor. I went through three names before I got his
right! I knew Butch’s name as well as my own. But at
Thought for tomorrow: We are not very my age, sometimes the wires don’t connect as
understanding or tolerant of our limitations. We quickly or predictably as they once did. Sometimes
forget how we are 'formed'. Instead of accepting our
creatureliness as a good gift from God, we often find
ourselves being harshly judgmental and unforgiving 9
NACR daily meditation for Saturday, February 10th, 2007 by Dale
of ourselves. This lack of compassion can lead to self‐ and Juanita Ryan. To subscribe go to www.nacronline.com or
abusive and self‐neglectful behaviors. When we pick up a copy of the Ryans’ book, Rooted In God’s Love,
copyright 1991.
39
fatigue, hormones, physical illness, over‐working, different. So I got myself prepared for heavenly
and under‐relaxing can cause us to seriously need a cathedrals. So there were some things that I chose
restorative touch. to do even in the face of impossible odds. Why did I
The most interesting case of crazy that I do that? Honestly, I don’t know. Except to say this:
experience is being surprised by God. Take for it’s God who makes us both willing and able.
example the two prison stories we’ve recently read Sometimes in the face of impossible odds and lost
in Acts. In story one, Peter is in prison and God sets dreams, we have an opportunity to continue to
him free. In the story today, Paul is in prison, is persevere. Then we wait upon the Lord. We ask him
miraculously freed, and then is instructed to stay to have His way with us. Sometimes our choices
put. The jailer almost commits suicide because he’s seem insane, but I have found that trusting in God
expecting the prisoners to have vanished after a and His purposes is ultimately the sanest place to
God‐inspired earthquake opens the prison doors and plant. (By the way, I admit fully my very unspiritual
casts off the chains. Paul and the others reassure satisfaction and delight when my daughter attended
him and the warden accepts Christ as his Savior that the University of Virginia in a class where more
very night. women than men were accepted and attended. It’s
That’s how God is; His ways aren’t ours. He has petty, I know. I’ll work on that when I get to step
plans and purposes, and even past history can’t four!)
predict what He is going to choose to do in and
through and with us. It’s this part of the character of February 19
God that I love so much. No matter how insane our
past life has been, and regardless of how predictable Scripture reading for today: Acts 18 – 19; Psalm 114
our future is based on our past, for those who come
to believe—watch out! God’s going to send you on a “I have been through some terrible things in my
grand, epic adventure far beyond your genetics, your life, some of which actually happened.” (Mark
history, or even your good intentions. Twain)
Anxiety disorders afflict about 19 million
Thought for today: What is impossible for people is Americans. Anxiety is a prevailing emotion—unlike
possible with God.” Luke 18:27 NLT fear, which is a spurt of emotion that disappears as
soon as the threat is neutralized. Anxiety is a feeling
Thought for tomorrow: When I was in elementary that lingers: a sense of dis‐ease, unrest, “a‐
school my family and I visited the University of something‐is‐not‐quite‐right attitude.”
Virginia. I thought the campus looked pretty and I Anxiety has been associated with a variety of
told the tour guide that I thought this might be a physical ailments including: cardiovascular diseases,
school I’d like to attend. “Little lady, no can do. This hypertension, colitis, irritable bowel syndrome,
college is just for men.” Once I felt that with ulcers, headaches, skin disorders, and decreased
absolute certainty the Spirit of God impress upon me immune responses, to name a few.
that I was to preach His message of hope to hurting Some anxiety disorders are more dangerous to the
people—to the ends of the earth. “Impossible. body than others. The most harmful are those that
You’re a woman; you’re Baptist. No way did God give create a release of stress hormones that just keep
you that message,” I was told by someone I deeply pumping into our bodies (there’s more on why this is
respected. But here’s the thing, and there’s no bad in another devotion).
escaping it. God’s purposes prevail. And that’s that. I The body cannot distinguish “real” from
figured if I was going to even have a shot at storming “perceived” stress. For example, if a young child
“The Grounds” at “The University” I’d better work witnesses a murder on a TV show, and it freaks them
hard in school, and I did (and was accepted in 1974 out, his body reacts with the same stress response as
with other women—we were a distinct minority, but if he had seen a murder. (I read that in a book; I
we were present). I recognized that I’d probably don’t make this stuff up!)
never deliver a message of hope from a pulpit on
planet earth, but I decided that heaven might look
40
Sometimes worry becomes a habit. This habit can worry,” he said, “he’s alive!” Then they all went back
literally become addicting. Some people get addicted upstairs, shared in the Lord’s supper, and ate
to adrenalin. Calm feels weird to a crisis junky. together. Paul continued talking to them until dawn,
It’s not just a myth: you can be scared literally to and then he left. Meanwhile, the young man was
death. Consider the story of Ananias and Sapphira. taken home unhurt, and everyone was greatly
Desiring social prestige and recognition for their relived. Acts 20:9‐12 NLT
giving at church, they pretended to give the total
sum of their possessions to the church. (This was a What a strange story! I don’t know quite what to
common practice at this time because new believers make of it, except to say that I’m glad no one has
were being ostracized from the community at large; ever responded like this when I was teaching! The
pooling resources enabled them to survive.) other observation is Paul’s one instruction: “Don’t
Both Ananias and Sapphira experienced sudden worry.”
death, probably due to an arrhythmia or heart attack
brought on by sheer panic. Can you relate? These I was at a meeting yesterday when a lady
two felt totally exposed and probably expected introduced herself as “the worry wart in the group,”
public humiliation. They were hoping for applause and she sounded quite proud! Scripture is full of
but now fully expected rejection. Taking step two exhortations to “not worry” and “fear not”…so is it
begins the process of setting aside all those things good to be a worrier? Many people believe that
we fear, one little piece at the time. We do this worrying is a sign of loving concern. I’ve discovered
because we are “coming to believe” that God can do that for me, worrying is usually more an indicator of
the impossible. I pray that today you will begin to unbelief.
move toward the peace of mind that trusting in God Worry is bad for the body. According to Dr. Don
can bring. Colbert, M.D., in his book Deadly Emotions,
untreated anxiety leads to a host of physical
Thought for today: Come to me, all you who are symptoms (which we tend to treat as if they are the
weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take root problem) including: tension headaches,
my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle digestive‐tract problems, skin eruptions,
and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your sleeplessness, weight loss or gain, muscle aches
souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light. (especially back and leg), lethargy, feelings of
Matthew 11:28‐30 NIV exhaustion, sluggish thinking, and lack of ambition.
Ignoring these symptoms results in disease—the
Thought for tomorrow: If you really want something kinds that require surgery, chemotherapy,
to worry about – hear this: highly anxious people are medications and other serious treatment
risking their physical health. Anxiety can kill you. But protocols. 10
know this too: Jesus says that with Him, you can Perhaps you remember that the book of Galatians
expect to find rest. You’re going to have to learn reminds us that we “reap what we sow” (see
from Him how to rest. “Coming to believe” from Galatians 6). I wonder if we’ve missed this point as it
Jesus’ perspective results in a lightening of burdens, applies to our health. If we fail to “come to believe”
not piling them on! and to allow a “Power greater than ourselves to
restore us to sanity,” we are reaping a body that will
February 20 get sick. (I am not suggesting that all sickness is the
result of sin.) It seems to me that when we fail to
Scripture reading for today: Acts 20 – 21; Psalm 114 believe (and become chronic worriers), then we are
reaping what we’ve sown, and our bodies show the
“As Paul spoke on and on, a young man named wear and tear of this persistent unbelief. That’s kind
Eutychus, sitting on the windowsill, became very of crazy, isn’t it?
drowsy. Finally, he fell sound asleep and dropped
three stories to his death below. Paul went down,
10
bent over him, and took him into his arms. “Don’t Paraphrased from Deadly Emotions, by Dr. Don Colbert,
Thomas Nelson Press, 2003, p.7.
41
Worry has little to do with love. It has a lot to do How different would our daily lives be if we
with confusion about who’s in control and what believed this statement? I know you are protesting;
intentions this “Power” has towards us. Sometimes of course I believe this, you are thinking. Really? Or is
what we call noble is called unbelief in the kingdom this a statement we acknowledge intellectually
of heaven; what we call inconsequential and un‐ without truly believing…
noteworthy, Jesus calls big believing. A small little “I am the resurrection and the life. Anyone who
story, some guy falls out a window, with one believes in me will live, even after dying. Everyone
instruction: don’t worry. The point was not “look at who lives in me and believes in me will never ever
the cool miracle that the guy survived the fall,” it die. Do you believe this, Martha?” “Yes, Lord,” she
was not “Paul healed the sleepy,” nor was it “limit all told him. John 11:25‐27 NLT
sermons to ten minutes ;” it was simply, “don’t Jesus has this conversation with Martha at a
worry.” moment of great trial. Martha’s brother, Lazarus,
has died, and the family believes that he could have
Thought for today: While Jesus was in the Temple, lived if Jesus had hastened to respond to their cries
he watched the rich people dropping their gifts in the for help. Martha continues in this passage to give
collection box. Then a poor widow came by and Jesus the theologically correct answer, saying that
dropped in two small coins. she has ALWAYS believed that he is the Messiah, the
“I tell you the truth,” Jesus said, “this poor widow Son of God, the one who has come into the world
has given more than all the rest of them. For they from God. All true.
have given a tiny part of their surplus, but she, poor But her anxiety reveals a deeper truth. “…Lord, he
as she is, has given everything she has.” Luke 21:1‐4 has been dead for four days. The smell will be
NLT terrible.”
Jesus responded, “Didn’t I tell you that you would
Thought for tomorrow: Who would fault the poor see God’s glory if you believe?” John 11:39‐40 NLT
widow for holding off on giving two coins? No one Worry and anxiety sometimes reveal more about
expected her to give. No one even valued her what we truly believe than our church attendance
offering—the small token that it was—the church records or our pontifications on theology.
treasurer was paying more attention to how much
the big givers were going to toss in the plate! But Thought for today: Please don’t misunderstand. I’m
Jesus took another view. She gave without fear not suggesting we run around chanting and rid
because she knew in whom she trusted, and she had ourselves of all anxiety. What I am asking from you is
no apparent anxiety. Jesus commends this this: tell the truth. Recognize and acknowledge your
perspective. In the heavenly realms, she’s royalty. I true state of belief. It’s okay to say, “Lord, I believe—
pray that today you will have Jesus’ view of your life. help me in my unbelief!” That’s the truth.
I pray that you will come to value the things that Remember, it’s God who will take it from that point
seem small in this world—the things that Jesus calls and move you to the next step in the process. Calling
huge in the heavens. I pray that this “coming to anxiety love and concern is deceitful; telling the
believe” kind of realization will fill you with peace truth invites God to have His way with us.
that passes all understanding. Don’t worry. Fear not.
March on. Thought for tomorrow: … Anyone who comes to God
must believe that He exists and that He rewards
February 21 those who earnestly seek him. Hebrews 11:6 NIV
Oh Lord, we believe. Help us in our unbelief to
Scripture reading for today: Acts 22 – 24; Psalm 115 remember that you are in the business of blessing us
as we seek you. No matter how dead we feel or
…Anyone who comes to God must believe that He appear, in you we find life and life abundant. Help
exists and that He rewards those who earnestly seek me live the truth of this today, even if I don’t feel it.
him. Hebrews 11:6 NIV
February 22
42
for his freedom. But instead, Paul was at peace,
Scripture reading for today: Acts 25 – 26; Psalm 115 knowing who was in control.

I met a high school senior recently for an Thought for today: Peaceful and passive are two
expensive cup of coffee. I smiled as my young friend different things. As peaceful as Paul was, he was
exclaimed, “I can’t wait to get to college! I am going actively seeking to do God’s will even in prison. He
to have so much freedom! I am so tired of my was part of the process, not feeling like a pawn in
parents ordering me around all the time!” God’s complex game of life. He knew he had a part,
and he relied on God to show him when and how to
I smile because I know her parents. They do take step. This is a far easier way to live than making it up
their job as parental units very seriously. I do know as we go and foolishly thinking that’s freedom.
her mom likes to keep up with the laundry and
regularly prepares meals that include not only a Thought for tomorrow: …for I have learned how to
meat but veggies and homemade bread too. I also be content with whatever I have. I know how to live
realize she tootles around in a cute little VW bug on almost nothing or with everything. I have learned
that is well maintained by a mechanically inclined the secret of living in every situation…For I can do
dad. I’ve also noticed how faithfully her mom gets everything through Christ, who gives me strength.
her to the orthodontist, the dentist, and the trendy Philippians 4:11‐13 NLT
salon in the city. I remember how her parents I think contentment is the by‐product of “coming
wanted her to go to the gifted school, but she to believe” in a God who has our best interests at
wanted to stay at her local school. (She’ll be heart, even though at any moment his provision is
graduating from her local school.) I’ll never forget mysterious and not easily recognizable in the seen
praying with her mom about a dangerous mission world.
trip experience that this child felt called to take. (She
took it and survived it; she also didn’t have to take February 23
out a loan to pay for it.) I even remember how
desperately her older siblings wanted her to follow Scripture reading for today: Acts 27 – 28; Psalm 116
in their footsteps in the school band. (She thrived in
the arts department.) I can’t say that I saw a lot of Paul’s life reminds me of an Indiana Jones movie.
“ordering around” going on in that family. Beaten, imprisoned falsely, shipwrecked, snake‐
I can’t wait until next October. If this precious bitten—a lot of bad stuff happens to Paul. I wonder
thing is anything like my children, she’s going to if he ever felt frustrated about all this action and
return home with a lot more appreciation for the life adventure. Anxiety isn’t the only emotion that
she left behind. I’ll bet she’s going to love those reveals hidden pockets of unbelief. Resentment,
laundry baskets being magically filled with clean hostility, and anger also can be toxic emotions.
clothes, her favorite dishes for dinner, and an Dr. Don Colbert, M.D. and author of Deadly
opportunity to just let her family take care of all the Emotions, claims that hostility, rage and anger are at
messy details of daily living. She’s going to love it. the top of the list of toxic emotions that generate an
That’s what “coming to believe” is like. It’s coming extreme stress reaction. (When you read this terrific
to realize that if we will allow our heavenly Father to book, you’ll understand that Colbert believes that
parent us, we will be able to relax about the details. unchecked stress is deadly.)
Consider what we’ve been reading about Paul. Before you refer this devotion to someone you
Stuck in prison, pleading his case, God gives him a love that is hostile, keep reading. According to
vision for going to Rome. I suspect that Paul would studies on aggression, most people are angrier than
have loved to go first class on a mission trip. But they realize. Twenty percent of the general
instead, he gets sent to Rome because he’s still in population — one in five — have measurable levels
prison and no one can decide quite what to do with of hostility high enough to dangerously affect their
his case. Paul could have been fretting away, chafing health. Here’s what happens to an angry body.
43
• Hostile people release more adrenaline and been discussing it all month. But I am convinced that
norepinephrine into their blood than the non‐ few of us have given our “believing” the serious
hostile. Angry people have elevated blood consideration it deserves.
pressure, cortisol levels, salt retention,
triglycerides, cholesterol and sticker platelets—all I also have a theory as to why we are deficit in the
predisposing factors for heart disease. believing department. For many of us, our families of
• A study in Finland showed that hostility is a origin have taught us to ignore the cries of our own
major risk factor and predictor of coronary artery hearts.
disease. (Hostiles are three times more likely to die
from cardiovascular disease than the calm.) • In unhealthy families, children are taught to
• Hostility may be a better predictor of not trust their own thoughts or feelings.
coronary disease than cigarette smoking, high • In unhealthy families, the thoughts and
blood pressure, and high cholesterol. feelings of each family member are not valued
Why wasn’t Paul torqued up about all his equally. (The most dependent member often
suffering? Because he knew his place in the story. He demands attention and sucks the energy out of
believed that there was a God, and he (Paul) didn’t the family—energy that should have been
get the job. He believed that God had good things dispersed among all the members.)
planned for him. Paul didn’t try to manipulate the • In unhealthy families, distorted thoughts,
world to bring those good things into reality; relationship styles, beliefs, and even mental health
instead, he entrusted himself to God and God’s time issues are “passed on” to the next generation. This
and interpretation of what “good” looked like. is done both consciously and unconsciously. Some
things we teach; many things we model.
Thought for today: If you read through all of the • In healthier families, there is both a
writings of Paul, you realize that Paul did get plenty commitment and a skill set that allows members
angry at times in his ministry. The goal here is not to to experience problems AND focus on the
eliminate anger from our diets. It’s simply that anger solutions.
shouldn’t be our main course. Like a very fattening, • In healthier families, the input of each
decadent dessert, it should be partaken of rarely. member is valued (which validates each person’s
worth). Remember that in unhealthy families, the
Thought for tomorrow: As he thinks in his heart, so needs of the children are usually subjugated to the
is he. Proverbs 23:7 NKJV desires of the parents.

If you can do this without getting angry (ha), ask Last night our youngest son was under the
three people who you believe know you well to mistaken impression that I drank out of his glass of
assess your “anger” quotient. On a scale of 1 – 10 milk. I did not. But that did not stop him from getting
(1=Ghandi, 10=a raging lunatic), how angry are you? up, pouring it out and refilling it with fresh milk. His
Remember, no matter what they answer, say this, father teased him about his compulsive cleanliness
“Thank you for sharing.” I hope some of you will when it comes to drinking glasses. (He takes
email me with your results. Just go to “Ask Teresa” exception to glasses with gunk in them. The rest of
on the web site and tell me what your average score us feel that if there is a little gunk in the bottom of a
was, and how surprised you were by the glass that has gone through the dishwasher then the
results….thanks! gunk is sterile. Perhaps this is unhealthy.)
I think what happened next was kind of cool. I
February 24 mentioned that although we liked to tease about the
gunk, I truly thought the new milk pouring was a bit
Scripture reading for today: Obadiah, Nahum 1‐3 obsessive. His comment to me was, “You’re sick a
lot.”
Today I want to ask you to consider taking “coming I can’t tell you the last time that I was sick. But
to believe” very seriously. Redundant? Yes. We’ve instead of saying, “Are you nuts? I’m healthy as a
44
horse. You’re wrong mister!” I asked for learned from you family since before you had words
clarification, “Tell me more.” to name them that are not in keeping with what God
After a brief discussion, he recalled my two has taught us? Could there be some strongly held
surgeries in 2005 (hernia repair and cataract beliefs that you cling to that are wrong? It’s crazy
removal) and the time I got the flu (also in 2005 and thinking to be out of alignment with God’s
was sick for weeks). I was glad to have this perspective. (But use caution: sometimes mere
information. Sure, I remembered the incidents. But I mortals tell us things about God that are not right.)
didn’t know that to him it felt like I was sick all the
time. That year took a toll on more than just my February 25
insurance company’s bottom line.
I know this seems like a silly example to you. But Scripture reading for today: Habkkuk 1 – 3
take a moment and dig deep. What began as a funny
incident at dinner led to an opportunity for Michael Yesterday I suggested that perhaps our “coming to
to get some stuff off his chest that he didn’t even believe” is stunted by our preconceived notions and
know had been perched there. I think Michael’s baggage from our past. Common preconceived
perspective probably got readjusted a bit. But for notions among children who have grown up in
sure, his parents learned something new. unhealthy families include: my feelings don’t count,
We certainly have our unhealthy patterns in our my feelings are wrong, my thoughts are crazy and/or
family, but in this instance, I think we had a healthy wrong, and I don’t matter and have no value.
moment. This would not happen in a family where a
kid has learned to never say what he’s thinking, None of these things are true in the kingdom of
feeling, believing, or fearing. This wouldn’t happen in God. But in our families sometimes they are, and
a family where the kid is concerned about the that leaves us anxious and angry. This can kill us. We
consequences if he says something that his folks know how it predisposes us to addictions and
might not agree with. unhealthy codependent relationships, but did you
If you live in a family that can’t have healthy know it can literally kill you?
discussion, conflict without confrontation, open • Hostility and anger are directly related to
sharing of feelings in an environment of mutual pain (physical). The psalmist knew this when he
respect—if those things aren’t happening, it’s going talked about his bones withering away and his
to be pretty hard for you to “come to believe.” back hurting day and night. He was right—he was
More on this topic tomorrow. in physical pain. (See Jeremiah 15:17‐18, Psalm 32,
129:2‐3)
Thought for today: Then we will no longer be like • Tension impacts blood circulation to the
children, forever changing our minds about what we back muscles—causing vessels and nerves to
believe because someone has told us something construct, reducing blood supply and oxygen to
different or because someone has cleverly lied to us tissues. Chronic ongoing constriction causes waste
and made the lie sound like the truth. Ephesians to build up in muscle tissue. Muscles in the back,
4:14 The Message neck, shoulders, buttocks, arms and legs are
effected. For more information about Sarno’s
Thought for tomorrow: There’s a verse in Isaiah that theories you may want to read The Mind‐Body
says this: Woe to those who call evil good and good Prescription, Healing Back Pain, Mind over Back
evil, who put darkness for light and light for Pain.
darkness, who put bitter for sweet and sweet for • “When a person begins to pack powerful
bitter. Woe to those who are wise in their own eyes and devastating emotions into the closet of his
and clever in their own sight. (5:20‐21 NIV). I want soul, he is setting himself up for trouble. Emotions
you to invite the Holy Spirit to direct you in this
matter; ask him to show you, are there things you
are believing about yourself, your world, others, and
God that are not true? Are there beliefs that you’ve
45
do not die. We bury them, but we are burying Leviticus has many more rules besides “don’t eat
something that is still living.” 11 that.” Most of the Levitical law was purportedly
One of the best skills a parent can teach a child is given during the year that Israel camped at Mount
how to identify and appropriately work through his Sinai. Much has been written about these laws and
or her emotions. As we’ve said earlier, lots of really their implications for us in today’s world, but I want
angry people don’t even know that they are hostile. you to focus on the theme of Leviticus: be holy. God
Signs of stuffed emotions are: perfectionism, a is holy; if He is our God, we are to do something
desire for control, self‐doubt and deprecation, (consecrate ourselves) and be holy ourselves.
cynicism and criticism, promiscuity, exaggerated Because of who God is, our belief in him should
responses to everyday occurrences, flashback change how we live.
memories or nightmares, and strong emotional I wonder if you sometimes find that message as
reactions that are inexplicable. discouraging and daunting as I do. Be holy. Wow.
Who can do that? I can’t even keep my calendar
Thought for today: Sometimes we’re so busy telling straight or my kitchen vacuumed. Holiness seems so
the world that we are “fine” (and hoping that this is far away.
true) that we fail to realize our deep and profound Coming to believe requires me to wrestle with the
need to believe. We miss cues that reveal to us our command. I can’t just pretend it isn’t in scripture. In
insanity and our need to be taught, led, healed, and the gospels, there’s even a call to “be ye perfect,”
nurtured. I pray that you will not be so stuck in your and just writing out those words fills me with fear. I
need to defend that you can’t look up and see God’s don’t think I’ll ever fully grasp all that this means for
commitment to restore. me as a believer finding her way back to God. But I
do believe it centers me—reminding me of several
Thought for tomorrow: Lead me; teach me; for you points relevant to step two:
are the God who gives me salvation. I have no hope • Who God is—holy—is amazing, frightening, and
except in you. Psalm 25:5 NIV mysterious.
• Who He has created me to “be”—my true God‐
February 26 created identity—can reflect part of that mysterious
glory.
Scripture reading for today: Instead of reading • What this means for my daily living is a constantly
Leviticus, thumb through it and note the chapter evolving, God‐inspired, Holy Spirit‐revealing process
headings. If you have any charts, glance over them far bigger than my pea brain can grasp unless God
(my NIV translation has some great summaries in chooses to teach me.
chart form), notice all the rules and regulations that • Where do I go from here? That is a question I will
helped guide the Israelites in their pursuit of be asking minute by minute, every day, for the rest
holiness. of my life.

Do you remember the “rules” God handed to Thought for today: Step two isn’t about answering
Adam and Eve when he presented them with the key all the questions. It’s about realizing that there are
to the Garden of Eden? One rule: And the Lord God questions worth asking, and a God capable of
commanded the man, “You are free to eat from any revealing all that I need to know in order to be who I
tree in the garden; but you must not eat from the need to be in this moment.
tree of the knowledge of good and evil, for when you
eat of it you will surely die.” Genesis 2:16‐17 NIV Thought for tomorrow: I am the Lord your God;
The rule was delivered in chapter two of Genesis, consecrate yourselves and be holy, because I am
and it was broken in chapter three. holy. Leviticus 11:44 NIV

11
Deadly Emotions, by Dr. Don Colbert, M.D., Thomas Nelson,
Inc., 2003, p. 54, 58.
46
February 27 May the Lord himself grant you both the
willingness and the ability to come to believe. May
Scripture reading for today: Jonah 1 ‐ 4 He grant you peace in the process. May you live
large in whatever land the Lord has planted you.
I wonder what you expect “coming to believe” to
mean in your life. How do you think “perfect”
believing would change your daily life experiences?
“Coming to believe” in step two is clearly a
process; more closely resembling a journey than an
arrival at an important destination. I wonder what
you imagine a faith journey would be like for you.

Thought for today: I hope you can set aside all those
thoughts, dreams, and expectations; just put them in
a box and tie a ribbon around them. I invite you to
consider allowing God to define how he wants your
journey to unfold. How different would your
perspective be if you were able to lay aside
everything and instead just walk the path?

Thought for tomorrow: “Remember the former
things, those of long ago; I am God and there is no
other; I am God and there is none like me. I make
known the end from the beginning, from ancient
times, what is still to come. I say: My purpose will
stand, and I will do all that I please…What I have
said, that will I bring about; what I have planned,
that will I do.” Isaiah 46:9‐11 NIV

February 28

Scripture reading for today: Psalm 116, 117, 118

Today concludes our study of step two. I hope you
have a snazzy notebook with lots of cool points that
you’re pondering from this month’s study. If not,
take some time to scroll back through the previous
studies.
You may want to take a moment and remember
step one too. Think about why these steps are next
to each other in the process.
I’d love it if you would take some special time and
reflect on the scripture passages, the metaphors, the
principles—whatever struck your heart from this
month’s reading. Go to “Ask Teresa” at
www.northstarcommunity.com and share some of
what you feel that God has revealed to you during
this devotional series.
47
STEP 3 We made a decision to turn our life and will him in the back while he slept. Or the time I
over to the care of God. accidentally pushed my husband down the stairs
while we were moving a couch. Then there was the
March 1 time HE managed to lodge our sleep sofa into our
hallway wall. And who could forget the time when I
Scripture reading for today: Ephesians 1; Micah 1 was nine months pregnant and had to help get the
and 2 car unclogged from a snowy embankment?)
It’s times like these when a well‐made decision
We made a decision. All of us can relate to making comes in handy. The matter is decided. And
a decision. Have you ever been frustrated with a although it may be inconvenient, annoying,
decision you’ve made? I am always making mysterious, or even questionable as to whether it
decisions. But sometimes my follow‐through makes was a good decision or a bad one, a decision made is
me question whether I really “decided” something one that you commit to regardless of how you feel
or just “considered” it. How many diet decisions about that decision at any given moment.
have you made and later recanted? You get the idea,
don’t you? There are decisions, and then there are Thought for today: Then we will no longer be
DECISIONS. Step three is a tricky kind of decision; it infants, tossed back and forth by the waves, and
involves process. blown here and there by every wind of teaching and
I don’t know a verb tense that appropriately by the cunning and craftiness of men in their
captures the ongoing nature of this decision. Once I deceitful scheming. Ephesians 4:14 NIV
was baptizing a man who chose to reveal his
“decision” publicly through baptism. This was a Thought for tomorrow: But when he asks, he must
baptism by immersion—the way Jesus was baptized. believe and not doubt; because he who doubts is like
First, he leaned back into the water. Once a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind.
submerged, I helped lift him back out of the water James 1:6 NIV Alternative translation: But when you
and up he arose! Pushing hair and water out of his ask him, be sure that your faith is in God alone. Do
face and shaking off the water like a shaggy dog, he not waver, for a person with divided loyalty is as
peered at me and said, “Wow! I feel different. This unsettled as a wave of the sea that is blown and
was a good decision. I just know that I’m never going tossed by the wind. James 1:6 NLT
to relapse again.” I felt a little twinge of concern. Don’t you want the tossing about to stop?
This is not magic; this is process. (He did relapse Sometimes the storm is most brutal right before the
again, but only once. It was his last relapse; I’m quite decision is made. There are many choices I don’t
sure he’ll not be relapsing in heaven.) have to entertain every day simply because I decided
On July 15th, 1978, I married my husband. The to be married to my beloved. A faith decision can be
entire ceremony lasted no longer than a good like that too. Once you decide, a calm certainty can
baptism. But the decision I made on that day is overtake your fretting. Make a decision; accept
remade daily. Daily I choose to humble myself to the God’s help!
marriage. That ceremonial expression of our decision
is not what keeps my husband and me married. March 2
We’re married because we make a decision daily to
be committed to each other. The initial decision is Scripture reading for today: Ephesians 2; Micah 3
vital, but it is also continual. (That’s process.) And it’s and 4
tricky. And some days we live out our decision with
more vim, vigor, and vitality than other days. Some She plopped down in my office with a decisive air
days we question our decision. (Like the time I of despair; there was no “upbeat happy camper”
wrecked the car we were planning to trade in that persona today. “I need to ask you a question,” she
night for a newer, cooler model. Or the time my began.
husband complained because our son, residing “Shoot.”
actively in my womb, was annoying him by kicking
48
“I want to know if you really think it is reasonable You just have to decide if you can accept all that
to expect me to make a decision to turn my life over pleasure.
to the care of God.”
“What do you think?” I respond. March 3
“I think you’re nuts.”
“Ok.” I answer, with no particular passion. I’ve Scripture reading for today: Ephesians 3; Micah 5,
been called worse. 6, 7
“You see, Teresa, here’s the deal. I’ve never had a
single person in my life who has ever taken decent “Little children form images of what the world is
care of me.” I nod in agreement. She’s right. Every like, what they themselves are like, and what God is
care provider she has ever had has been a huge like through the interactions they have with their
disappointment. parents. Images are powerful mental pictures that
“So why should I trust anyone—even God?” are deeply rooted in us. If parents are consistent,
It’s a reasonable question. Most of us craft our compassionate, attentive and responsive to a child,
earliest views about God from the adults in our lives. the child will probably picture God as consistent,
Children are defenseless, and the adults in their lives compassionate, attentive and responsive. If parents
are the first introduction they have to a God‐like are neglectful, inconsistent or abusive, the child’s
figure. It’s hard to make a decision to believe that perception of God will almost certainly include those
man or God cares for you when you’ve never had a traits. Many people recognize early in the recovery
human love you well. process that they have acquired distorted images of
I don’t know how to answer my despairing friend. God and that these images have a profound effect
But I do know that my deciding to believe came on their current relationship with God. But
about as a result of my commitment to discovery. recognition does not by itself make the distortions
Long before I decided to trust, I decided to study. disappear. It is a long and difficult struggle to replace
Our readings in Ephesians can help us understand images of a harsh and punitive God with images of
the mind of Christ and his intentions toward us. It’s God as trustworthy and loving. But it is possible. God
up to us to make the decision whether we will has, fortunately, revealed his character to us in clear
believe what He says about who He is, or if we will terms. God is a not distant, unknowable God. God
fall for cheap, fake, and false imitations of Him based has come near to us, has been among us, has
on our limited experiences. learned personally what it feels like to live on a fallen
planet.” 12
Thought for today: Long before he laid down earth’s
foundations, he had us in mind, had settled on us as Thought for today: God saved you by his grace
the focus of his love, to be made whole and holy by when you believed. And you can’t take credit for this;
his love. Long, long ago he decided to adopt us into it is a gift from God. Salvation is not a reward for
his family through Jesus Christ. (What pleasure he good things we have done, so none of us can boast
took in planning this!) Ephesians 1:4‐5 The Message about it. For we are God’s masterpiece. He has
created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the
Thought for tomorrow: I don’t know what kind of good things he planned for us long ago. Ephesians
role models you have for God, but I do know that the 2:8‐10 NLT
genuine God is all about making us whole and holy
by His love. Notice that this doesn’t say we get Thought for tomorrow: I know believing isn’t for
whole and holy by His discipline or His wrath or His sissies, but I wonder: What do you have the most
judgment. No, it is His love that compels Him to trouble deciding to believe?
adopt us into His family through Jesus. And this • That God is powerful enough to save you (even
pleased Him. This was not a hard decision for Him. from yourself)?
He loves us; He’s made the decision; He’s settled on
you as the focus of His love. You can’t change that.
12
Rooted In God’s Love, by Dale and Juanita Ryan, Zondervan
House Publishing, p.203.
49
• That this salvation is a free gift with no strings to experience some major renovation. But note this:
attached? Paul didn’t start out with a discourse on proper
• That the good things that you hope make you behaving; he began with an impassioned plea to
worthy of His love have nothing to do with why God believe.
was willing to save you?
• That you are a masterpiece? Thought for today: It’s in Christ that we find out
• That deciding to believe guarantees you a re‐ who we are and what we are living for. Long before
created self who can do the good things God we first heard of Christ and got our hopes up, he had
planned for you to accomplish (long ago, way before his eye on us, had designs on us for glorious living,
you messed your life up so royally)? part of the overall purpose he is working out in
After reading Ephesians, I’m wondering what the everything and everyone. Ephesians 1:11 The
downside is to “big” believing… Message

March 4 Thought for tomorrow: My kid is at this very
moment trying out for his high school lacrosse team.
Scripture reading for today: Ephesians 4; Amos 1, 2 He loves the game of lacrosse, but I think he loves
and 3 his team more. He loves the camaraderie, the fight
for a great goal in the midst of fierce competition,
If you’re following along with our reading plan, you the cool uniforms, and the way it feels to walk off
have already read half of the book of Ephesians. I the field with a well‐earned victory. He hates to lose
love this short book. Written by Paul, this six‐chapter but loves the guys on his team regardless of the
letter, intended for the church in Ephesus, packs a outcome. He doesn’t mind his coach coaching; he
big punch. appreciates the value of training. He just loves it all.
Paul has one simple message: if you will decide to So did Paul. He loved writing his buddies in Ephesus
believe, then you can change. But change cannot and encouraging them to push on to victory. I think
happen on anyone’s terms but God’s. The good he loved everything about being on Christ’s team.
news according to Paul is that God has the power to Even the crushing defeats were minimized as a result
transform us; the potential barrier is our of his commitment to playing hard with people he
unwillingness to turn our lives over to His care. loved. Paul believed. I wonder if it would help you to
Paul’s message to his friends in Ephesus leaps know that finding a community to worship with is a
ahead of our 12 steps in 12 months study plan, but I lot like being on an awesome lacrosse team. It’s lots
don’t want you to miss what he’s communicating. of work, lots of laughs, and lots of frustrations. But
First, in chapters one, two and three, Paul tells us how sweet is the sound when our sticks are raised
who (God through Jesus) has the power, how He high in triumph, and we know that we have not only
intends to use it (for good and not for evil, and for us found our freedom but been assured the outcome:
not against us), and why (so that we might fulfill His victory in, through, and with God. Lacrosse is a
plans for our lives—plans he concocted long, long messy game where the kids do all sorts of things
ago). mothers disapprove of; they run with sticks in their
Beginning in today’s reading, we’ll read about the hands, steal the ball from others, hit each other, and
“what.” What does all this transforming power mean push each other around. Deciding to believe is messy
for our daily lives? Paul will finish off this epistle with too. It requires us to rethink all the rules we’ve lived
a lot of instructions about how we should get along by. It requires us to like being coached, to appreciate
with each other. For our purposes, I hope we can the value of training. It means that we must care
remember this one big idea: God cares about how more about the team than the needs of an
we live and love each other. How we behave individual. It’s hard, but it’s worth it. So get with the
matters. What we decide to believe is really program; decide to believe. And I’m not talking
important, but so is how we choose to behave as a about some wishy‐washy, hoping‐that‐it will‐work
result of that believing. Making the decision to kind of believing; I mean the kind of believing that is
believe inevitably means that our behaving is going
50
sometimes decided with a clenched fist and a sweaty sin! How terrible! Just look at how clearly the
brow. You can do it! Get started today. scriptures speak about this subject—how dare
anyone commit this vile act against holy God! The
March 5 next week we talked about adultery. Specifically, we
discussed Jesus’ instructions to men when he says, If
Scripture reading for today: Ephesians 5; Amos 4 & you even look at another woman with lust in your
5 heart, you’ve committed adultery in your heart (see
Matthew 5:27‐28). The room was strangely silent. It
I am concerned about you. I am afraid you will struck me as sad, really, how easy it was for us to
rush past big believing, and move on to trying to judge others so harshly for a sin (that presumably
behave, without pausing to prepare. Frankly, that’s wasn’t an issue for any of them) yet how reluctant
easier than doing the work of believing, and humans we were to engage in meaningful conversation
gravitate towards softer, gentler solutions. If a about an area of behaving that surely every person
microwave will accomplish the same purposes as a in that room could relate to. So I’m concerned that
conventional oven, we will pick the microwave, you’re going to follow the example of these young
right? believers who found it easier to discuss a sin that
So let’s read chapter five in Ephesians, and I’ll they couldn’t relate to than it was to wrestle with
illustrate my concern. Imitate God, therefore, in one that they no doubt had experienced. When we
everything you do, because you are his dear children. rush through believing and straight to behaving, this
Live a life filled with love, following the example of can happen to us. We can seek to avoid getting
Christ. Ephesians 5:1‐2 NLT honest about our own stuff and instead set up rules
Reframing: to live by that we think we can manage on our
• Believing will require me to know God well own—independently of God. I warn you: don’t do
enough to imitate Him in every single solitary this. None of us can behave our way into the good
moment of my life. graces of God, nor do we have to! God has a
• Believing is contingent upon me understanding different way to handle our “issues” that is far more
my relationship with God (I’m His kid; not his effective than us trying to muster up the self control
indentured servant, not His pawn, not an object of necessary to play by the rules.
His wrath; I’m His baby.)
• Believing will always, always, always mean Thought for tomorrow: The work of God is this: to
loving, and loving is best exemplified by Christ. believe in the one he has sent. John 6:29 NIV
• Believing will require me to know how Jesus We’ve all worked so very hard at behaving. I know
loved, and will necessitate me learning how to it makes sense to us that good behavior would
apply how He loved to my daily life experience please God, and I’m sure it does! But what He has
(I’ve got work to do!). asked of us is this: believe in the one he has sent. I
Hang with me on this point: it’s far easier to rush suspect he knows that if we’ll believe, then He can
to the second half Ephesians and study what it says lead us in how he wants us to behave.
we should do than to camp in two little verses long
enough to grasp their astounding implications. March 6

Thought for today: Once a long time ago, Pete (my Scripture reading for today: Ephesians 6; Amos 6 &
husband) and I were teaching a “newlywed” Bible 7
study at church. Someone in charge of curriculum
got the idea that the summer months would be a We have a video link on our Web site that I think
good time to bring out a series of biblical studies on you’ll want to watch. It’s a monologue delivered by
sexuality. I’ll never forget the experience for a late night talk show host Craig Ferguson. He’s
variety of reasons, some of which I can’t share! One speaking about his own history with alcoholism, and
Sunday our topic was homosexuality, and these he’s got a lot of great things to say. (Check it out at
newlyweds really got into it! Oh, they said, what a www.northstarcommunity.com and follow the links.)
51
Ferguson expresses an opinion in his message that doubt that God can love you, talk to someone about
many of us share. He describes the difference it. Email us, and we can have a conversation. Know
between a “good” and a “bad” treatment facility. this: you were created to believe! May you become
The good ones, according to Ferguson, say this to the Prince or Princess Warrior that God had in mind
the recovering addict leaving treatment: “You’ve when he created you!
made a good start. But you have a chronic condition
that you will need to deal with for the rest of your March 7
life.” (Bad paraphrase, but I think you get the point.)
What he describes in vivid (and comic) detail is the Scripture reading for today: Psalm 1, Proverbs 1,
chronic nature of addiction. He pleads with us to Amos 8 and 9
know this and to respond to this information
responsibly. Ephesians six says the same thing about If we “make a decision,” then we need to proceed
the life of one who believes. Paul writes in chapter with the turning over of our lives. I don’t want you to
six about the fierce, invisible warfare that is waged be uninformed about this kind of life‐transforming
against us on a daily basis. choice. The Twelve Steps: A Spiritual Journey A
As I’ve said many times, deciding to believe is Working Guide For Healing (RPI Publishing, Inc.
serious business. Believing isn’t a magic pill; it is a 1994) has a list (see p. 258) of common behaviors
battle. Believing requires us to suit up and show up associated with persons in need of recovery. Here
every day. There’s some good news in this passage they are (check the ones that apply to you):
that I don’t want us to miss. Just as addicts all o We have feelings of low self‐esteem that cause
around the world find help when they gather with us to judge ourselves and others without mercy.
others who have similar problems, believers follow We cover up or compensate by trying to be
this same model and see awesome results. There are perfect, take responsibility for others, attempt
those who have gone before us that can offer us to control the outcome of unpredictable events,
their experience, strength, and hope. Paul doesn’t get angry when things don’t go our way, or
want us to be surprised when things are difficult. He gossip instead of confronting an issue.
doesn’t want you and me to think we’re doing “it” o We tend to isolate ourselves and to feel uneasy
wrong, or that “it” doesn’t work simply because it around other people, especially authority
feels like war. It is war! It is a fight! But we have figures.
weapons in our arsenal that are guaranteed to o We are approval seekers and will do anything to
prevail. That’s really, really good news! make people like us. We are extremely loyal
even in the face of evidence that suggests loyalty
Thought for today: …for everyone born of God is undeserved.
overcomes the world. This is the victory that has o We are intimidated by angry people and
overcome the world, even our faith. Who is it that personal criticism. This causes us to feel anxious
overcomes the world? Only he who believes that and overly sensitive.
Jesus is the Son of God. 1 John 5:4‐5 NIV o We habitually choose to have relationships with
emotionally unavailable people with addictive
Thought for tomorrow: When we are struggling with personalities. We are usually less attracted to
coming to believe, many of us doubt that God can healthy, caring people.
love us. Sure, we think, that may work for someone o We live life as victims and are attracted to other
else, but not for me. Some of our lifestyles have victims in our love and friendship relationships.
scarred us, and left us feeling “less than” and We confuse love with pity and tend to “love”
ashamed. What if those feelings of shame are being people we can pity and rescue.
used by Satan himself to trick you into doubting your o We are either overly responsible or very
place in God’s grand epic adventure? Deciding to irresponsible. We try to solve others’ problems
believe will require us to accept some things or expect others to be responsible for us. This
because God said them before we have the life enables us to avoid looking closely at our own
experience to assure us that they are true. If you behavior.
52
o We feel guilty when we stand up for ourselves or your body and strength for your bones. Proverbs 3:5‐
act assertively. We give in to others instead of 8 NLT
taking care of ourselves.
o We deny, minimize, or repress our feelings from March 8
our traumatic childhoods. We have difficulty
expressing our feelings and are unaware of the Scripture reading for today: Psalm 5 & 6, Proverbs 2
impact this has on our lives.
o We are dependent personalities who are After yesterday’s list that reminds us of how
terrified of rejection or abandonment. We tend “common” we are – today’s list is a lot more
to stay in jobs or relationships that are harmful inspirational. The Twelve Steps: A Spiritual Journey A
to us. Our fears can either stop us from ending Working Guide For Healing (RPI Publishing, Inc.
hurtful relationships or prevent us from entering 1994) has a list (see p. 255) of milestones in recovery
healthy, rewarding ones. that are downright dreamy. Read these, setting aside
o Denial, isolation, control, and misplaced guilt are for just a minute your pile of problems, and instead,
symptoms of family dysfunction. Because of think about what potential you’ll have if you will
these behaviors, we feel hopeless and helpless. choose to make a decision to turn your life over to
o We have difficulty with intimate relationships. God.
We feel insecure and lack trust in others. We o We feel comfortable with people, including
don’t have clearly defined boundaries and authority figures.
become enmeshed with our partner’s needs and o We have a strong identity and generally approve
emotions. of ourselves.
o We have difficulty following projects through o We accept and use personal criticism in a
from beginning to end. positive way.
o We have a strong need to be in control. We o As we face our own life situation, we find we are
overreact to change over which we have no attracted by strengths and understand the
control. weaknesses in our relationships with other people.
o We tend to be impulsive. We take action before o We are recovering through loving and focusing
considering alternative behaviors or possible on ourselves; we accept responsibility for our own
consequences. thoughts and actions.
o We feel comfortable standing up for ourselves
Thought for today: If these characteristics remind when it is appropriate.
you of someone, then I have good news for you. o We are enjoying peace and serenity, trusting
Turning your life over will transform some of these that God is guiding our recovery.
nagging, painful patterns that have characterized o We love people who love and take care of
your life up to this point. But here’s the tough part: it themselves.
may get worse before it gets better. Turning over o We are free to feel and express our feelings even
our lives is challenging work. It means that we have when they cause us pain.
to consider and reconsider our ways. We’ll have to o WE have a healthy sense of self‐esteem.
ask ourselves: could I be wrong? Is my perception o We are developing new skills that allow us to
skewed? Is there a new and different way to initiate and complete ideas and projects.
respond? Think about it. o We take prudent action by considering
alternative behaviors and possible consequences.
Thought for tomorrow: Trust in the Lord with all o We rely more and more on Christ as our Higher
your heart; do not depend on your own Power.
understanding. Seek his will in all you do, and he will
show you which path to take. Don’t be impressed Thought for today: My prayer is that for today, you
with your own wisdom. Instead, fear the Lord and will allow yourself to dare to dream about your
turn away from evil. Then you will have healing for potential. Pause to prepare. May today be the day
you come one step closer to living your big dreams.
53
in, He will bring new experiences and new people
Thought for tomorrow: God reminds us, I heard into your life that will allow you to connect with
your call in the nick of time; the day you needed me, I people in new and wonderful ways.
was there to help. Well, now is the right time to I know that life experiences and our own twisted
listen, the day to be helped. 2 Corinthians 6:2 The “thought lives” often leave us feeling alone, isolated,
Message unique, and not quite right. Life has more to offer
than our past experiences or our messy minds. I just
March 9 want you to know that if you decide to really take
step three to heart, you’re freeing God to bless you.
Scripture reading for today: Psalm 7 & 8, Proverbs 3 Blessings come wrapped in strange gifts. Sometimes
they come in the form of a new friend saying to you,
Have you seen the movie, Little Miss Sunshine? It “I felt the same way when that happened to me.”
has received a lot of critical acclaim. If you saw it, I That, my friends, is a message of hope. It means
wonder how it made you feel …send me an email we’re not alone, isolated, or a goof.
and tell me, please! I’m taking a survey. I’m serious
about this; how did the movie make you feel? Thought for today: You and I have expected people,
Here’s the thing. My boys thought it was funny, places, and things to make us happy. So how has
and so did my husband. I found it traumatizing to that worked out? Some of us have learned that
watch. I kept saying things like: people aren’t very reliable, so we’ve come to love
“Why for the love of Pete did they let Grandpa things and use people. This is twisted. God created
move into their house when he got kicked out of us to love people and use things. One of the things I
assisted living…for doing drugs???? There are young love about God is His intentional transforming
children in this home. What were these parents power. When people decide to become His
thinking?” desperately devoted followers, God transforms them
“What on earth is wrong with this family? Why are from the inside out. God is then able to utilize these
they asking the teenage son to watch over the people as resources for other hurting people. I know
suicidal uncle? Why does that kid have to beg his that self‐reliance may be a coat you pull over your
uncle to ‘please don’t kill yourself tonight’?” shoulders every morning. It is my prayer that today
This kind of questioning during a movie really you will be challenged—and comforted—to know
annoyed my family. It was a good movie. Parts of it that there are people in this world who have been
were funny. The things that hurt me so much were given the gift of loving and loving well. Making the
all the parts that were so, well, real. Watching that decision to believe, and turning our lives over to
movie with my family left me feeling a little isolated God’s care and control, is going to give us the
and weird. (I’m pretty sure they thought I was acting opportunity to learn how to love and be loved. This
like a big goof!) is messy business. So it’s true what we’ve learned:
This week my family and I went on a road trip and man—especially man living independently of God—
visited a seminary my son may attend. It was fun! is not trustworthy. But what is also true: man
We had an opportunity to have lunch with one of indwelled with the Spirit of God is one who can both
the professors, and we talked briefly about, of all know and do the will of Him who sent him. May God
things, Little Miss Sunshine. He shared my reaction place just such a person in your life today! Not
to the movie. It felt good to connect to another everyone can share your past hurts, habits, and
person at such a visceral level. hang‐ups. That means that sometimes they can’t
If you make a decision to turn your life over to the relate when a movie (or other event) triggers strong
care and control of God, your life is going to get very emotional responses in you. That’s okay. God will
interesting. Sometimes you’ll be left feeling like Alice find a way to meet you wherever you are. He may
in Wonderland when she fell down that big hole into even use a fellow human to accomplish this task.
a strange, new world.
But here’s the really cool thing that I can share Thought for tomorrow: It is better to take refuge in
with you from personal experience: If you invite God the Lord than to trust in man. It is better to take
54
refuge in the Lord than to trust in princes. Psalm and an obligation to learn a new way of living. This is
118:8‐9 NIV what it means to turn our life and will over to the
care of God—our new daddy.
March 10
March 11
Scripture reading for today: Psalm 9, Proverbs 4,
Song of Solomon (some bibles call it Song of Songs) 1 Scripture reading for today: Psalm 10 and 11,
Proverbs 5
If you keep up with the recommended scripture
reading, I wonder how you’ll respond to Proverbs 4. “O Lord, why do you stand so far away? Why do
I’ve had several conversations over the years with you hide when I am in trouble?” Psalm 10:1 NLT
people who got all hot and bothered by the writer’s
assumptions. I’ve said it a million times, but I think it’s worth
This is a chapter written by a guy who believes that saying again: healthy families are wildly different,
his dad gave him solid advice. He proposes a creative blends of people. Healthy families have
principle for right living: listen to your dad and all problems just like dysfunctional families do, but
will go well with you. But what do you do with that healthy families are more focused on solutions.
advice when you’ve come to believe that your father Healthy families skip over the blaming, shaming, and
gave you bad counsel, or abandoned you, or simply finger pointing and move right on to the next
neglected to share any wisdom at all? question: where do we go from here?
Two thoughts for today. 1. Whether right or Dysfunctional families are eerily similar in their
wrong, good or bad, every single one of us is a patterns of relating to each other and their world. In
student of our family of origin. We can commentate dysfunctional families: problems fester and solutions
on the worth of this educational experience until the are rarely sought, children learn that they can’t trust
cows come home. Our natural inclinations are the adults to protect them, someone is usually to
formed at the feet of our parental units; we are born blame, feelings of hopelessness and helplessness are
imitating the family we are born into. So watch common.
yourself. Judge all you want, but remember this: It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out that
apples don’t usually fall far from the tree. I don’t unhealthy families are breeding grounds for raising
know a family that has perfectly executed the task of codependents‐in‐training. (If you don’t have a
perfect parenting. Pete and I certainly haven’t. Each working knowledge of the nature of codependency,
of us makes parenting blunders—blunders our check out our Insight Journal on this topic.)
children could easily imitate. I suggest that you Codependents‐in‐training find it particularly
consider ceasing the critique of what your parents difficult to believe that God is near. Obviously the
did or did not do, and instead begin to take psalmist joins the rest of us in struggling with this
responsibility to learn from God what the next right false belief. Just because this isn’t true doesn’t mean
step is for you. 2. This is great news for all of us. We we don’t feel as if it is true. It’s okay to have these
have the opportunity—the privilege—to decide to feelings; it’s normal to have these thoughts. But…
accept God’s offer of adoption. God invites us to (The truth always follows the “but.”) But “coming to
come to believe, and we need to seriously consider believe” and “making a decision” require us to
His offer. At the moment we decide, we are rethink our firmly held and often erroneous views of
transported into a new family system. God, ourselves, and others.
Turning our lives over to God is going to require
Thought for today: The Lord will fight for you; you each of us to learn how to “let go and let God”. It’s
need only to be still. Exodus 14:14 NIV not easy. If you’re struggling with relinquishing
control, perhaps this thought will help. Although it is
Thought for tomorrow: Consciously, willfully, not easy to learn new ways of living, it is also really,
deliberately, intentionally—stop. Pause to prepare. really hard and stressful to try to chart your own
Adoption into a new family means a fresh beginning course. Right? Aren’t you tired of being tired? It’s
55
exhausting carrying on as if you’re the captain, co‐ It disturbs me that we seem to be so reluctant to
captain, chief cook, and bottle washer all rolled into dive into the deep end of the pool when it comes to
one (very frazzled) person. finding our way back to God. Let me explain. If you
were going to be a physician, you’d expect to have
Thought for today: I want to leave you with to study and work diligently to gain the skill sets to
something to ponder. While we were in California be a decent doctor. The mechanics that regularly
this week, all my codependency issues raised their interpret my complaints about my car have
ugly little heads. This happened while riding down certificates hanging on their walls demonstrating
route 110 late at night, jet‐lagged, headed to a their commitment to learning the language of ladies
strange city in an even stranger state. I just had the who show up at their shops in need of car repair. If
urge to boss Pete (the driver) and Scott (the we want to play golf, tennis, football, or lacrosse,
navigator) around. I’m sure my guys will claim that I most of us receive some kind of instruction and
do this all the time. But I’m serious; I really wanted coaching.
to hoot and holler and nag and control more than First, we receive instruction. The doctors and
usual. I’m an excellent backseat driver, really. But I mechanics go to class, the athletes go to camps, and
didn’t. I asked a question: “Do you guys need me for every student reads books on the subject they are
anything?” seeking to understand.
“NO!” They responded in unison. Second, we practice what’s been preached. We
So I did what any recovering person can do: I laid take tests, apprentice, stand at the base line and hit
my weary head back, closed my eyes, and fell asleep. balls, hang out at the driving range, practice our stick
I’m not suggesting that we all start sleepwalking work in lacrosse and our tackles on the football field.
through life. I am asking you to consider a radical, Third, people give us feedback. Sometimes we
new way of thinking: we don’t need to fix other appreciate the input, but often we chaff under the
people’s problems, guide other people’s destinies, or instruction. It’s only in hindsight that most of us
inventory other people’s choices (or even comment come to appreciate those that have pushed us to
on them). Take a load off. Be still. Rest. Stop achieve beyond what we currently believe we can
meddling. If you ask God, “Do you need me for accomplish.
anything?”—what do you think He will say? There’s
a huge difference between needing and wanting. Thought for today: All this is good stuff. But it’s just
God wants relationship with us; He does not need us “seen world” learning. How are we doing in the area
to make sure the world keeps rotating. Chill. of heart transformation? Are we willing to go to any
lengths to figure out what it means to turn our lives
Thought for tomorrow: Be still and know that I am over to God’s care and control? I’m just asking. We’ll
God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be look at more on this topic tomorrow.
exalted in the earth. Psalm 46:10 NIV
Thought for tomorrow: Teach me to do your will,
March 12 for you are my God; may your good Spirit lead me on
level ground. Psalm 143:10‐11 NIV
Scripture reading for today: Psalm 12 and 13; Song
of Solomon 2 March 13

I’ve been pretty consistently beating the drum Scripture reading for today: Proverbs 6; Song of
about re‐learning, re‐thinking, and renewed Solomon 3 and 4
believing. For me, this re‐education process has
been an essential part of my decision to “come to After about ten years of “doing church,” I almost
believe,” and I suspect that this principle is true for threw in the towel. I decided that either the way I
others too. Let me speak frankly (and I pray, gently) was going about practicing my faith was wrong
to you about something that really bothers me. (which was hard for me to believe), OR there was no
God. So, I cut a deal with the God of my limited
56
understanding. I told Him that for one year I was Third, I got some good counseling. I found out
going to give Him a chance to prove Himself to me something about myself during all this study and
(how arrogant), or I was done with religion. Even I practice time. I realized that I had some potentially
realized this wasn’t the most respectful conversation fatal flaws in my character and in my thought life.
in the world, so I “sweetened the pot” in order to try My studying and practicing was frustrating. I needed
to win God’s approval of this plan. I promised Him help. I decided to go to a spiritual mentor who could
that each morning I’d wake up and ask only one guide me in unpacking some of my reactions to this
question, “Lord, if you exist and if I were completely new way of living. I joined a small group. I
convinced, how would I live this day?” And I did it. intentionally sought relationships with a few people
Here is some of what I learned. who I knew could assist me in this grand experiment.
First, I realized that if God existed, then it made I truly don’t think parts one and two would have
sense for me to learn more about Him. I had been in been sustainable without this key component to this
church, heard the sermons, attended Bible studies, decision‐making process. This is the same kind of
conferences, and workshops; but I hadn’t really feedback a young intern would receive. I got some
become a student of scripture. I sort of audited all of good coaching. Why am I telling you all this?
the classes. When I asked the daily question, I Because I want you to really think about whether
decided that a convinced believer would stop you’ve ever decided to turn your life and will over to
copping out and taking everything pass/fail. So when God. I had been a faithful, committed, active
my babies went down to bed and Pete was at work member of my church for ten years when I began
or out of town, I studied. Remember that this is this experiment. I believed. I was baptized. I simply
exactly how interns become doctors, guys who love had never decided to turn my life and will over to
cars become mechanics, and hacks become Tiger God. Can you relate?
Woods‐ish, etc.
Second, I quit all my church committees. This was Thought for today: Commit to the Lord whatever
radical. But I couldn’t find anywhere in scripture you do and your plans will succeed. Proverbs 16:3
where it said I should be at church working all the NIV
time instead of spending time developing my
intimate, personal relationship with God. (Don’t Thought for tomorrow: The year passed without me
misinterpret me; I did this for a season. There’s noticing. I still wake up every morning and ask the
plenty in scripture to guide us and instruct us about same question. I am still living by steps one, two and
our need for community and supporting the work of three with varying degrees of “success”. In fact, let
our church community in particular. But I had gotten me close with this thought. If you had asked me in
all out of whack, and a serious re‐evaluation time the beginning how I would have described a
was essential.) I replaced all those committees with successful outcome for that first year, I would have
practice. I considered this my apprenticeship. When I said this: “Well, I think I’ll become a sweeter, kinder,
read instructions for how to live in scripture, and I gentler person. I’m pretty sure I’ll become an
asked the daily question, I proceeded as best as my introvert. I probably will acquire a dainty laugh and
heart could discern. Although I ditched several no longer struggle with an addiction to peanut
committees, I did find myself working in a prison butter. I’m sure my husband and children will adore
ministry. I found myself spending more time me. I’ll probably learn how to become a frugal
teaching my children about God and less time shopper. I’m pretty sure I’ll be unrecognizable; the
plopping them in front of Sesame Street. I made new me truly will be new. Off with the old.”
meal plans and actually went to the grocery store It hasn’t happened. Hindsight is always 20/20, and
(Pete enjoyed this season). I spent a lot of time in with the clarity I have at the moment, I’ll say this: I
conversation with others about God stuff. Each day think God is doing something in, with, and through
was a different day. I was asking a question each me. I’m not at all sure how to measure it, nor do I
morning, and every day brought new challenges. care to. I just know that this is a cool way to live. It’s
Again, this was the same kind of practicing that all of a good life. It’s not perfect. It is perfectly messy.
us do when we’re pursuing a new skill set. Some days I slip, and forget to ask the question.
57
Many days of slipping have taught me that those are
never my best days. I know I’m going to grow • 13:1 I’m not alone in this feeling of
forgetful, but I’ve learned to trust in God’s nearness, isolation I have. Even a guy who got his writings in
even when I wander. You should try it. Maybe you the Bible asked this kind of question. I wonder if
don’t want to try it for a year, but you could try it for this means that God doesn’t mind it if we’re
today… honest with Him. Hmmmm…it has to mean that, or
else God clearly could have edited this out.
March 14 Teresa’s take away: I need to start getting more
honest with God.
Scripture reading for today: Psalm 14 and 15, • 13:2 My notes say this is from David. I
Proverbs 7 remember him. He was the giant killer. Goodness!
I look him up in my concordance, read all about
During my year of decision, I came across this: him and find out that scripture says he’s a man
Obey my commands and live! Guard my instructions after God’s own heart; God loved David. He was
as you guard your own eyes.” Proverbs 7:2 NLT And also a murderer, adulterer, and apparently a very
I thought ‐ I don’t have a clue how to do this. Some poor parent. This totally blows my mind. I don’t
days, my eyes would droop with boredom as I read get this. How can such a messy dude be so loved
scripture. (Sorry, but it’s true.) I didn’t get a lot of by God? This is more than I can process. I’m going
what it meant. I had very little historical background. to ask someone about this…
I was kind of wandering around in my own • 13:3 David thinks God can restore sparkle. I
wilderness experience. So I decided to change up my thought that was the job of a good anti‐
routine. I had always been a voracious reader. But depressant!
during this year, I decided that reading about • 13:4 What a human guy! Even this king
scripture might be cheating. So I decided to limit my worried about what others thought. He had
studies simply to scripture. (I don’t necessarily enemies. He didn’t want to be put in a position of
recommend this. But I needed to do this for me, shame. I get that. I’m still wondering though, how
because I’m a big cheater and I might disengage my God could love him.
brain and just decide some expert knows best.) This • 13:5 I’m noticing a pattern. I saw this in
proved to be not very simple. But I did it. On any Lamentations too. These guys pour out their guts,
given day, I might have come across this Psalm. but they seem to always circle their wagons back
to this point: I trust in your unfailing love. I wonder
O Lord, how long will you forget me? Forever? if this is more of a decision than a firmly held
How long will you look the other way? belief. It seems like to me that these guys really
How long must I struggle with anguish in my soul, wrestle with fear, anxiety, and a sense of God
with sorrow in my heart every day? being far away, but they keep coming back to a
How long will my enemy have the upper hand? decision to believe that God is who He says He is. I
Turn and answer me, O Lord my God! don’t know why this makes me feel better about
Restore the sparkle in my eyes, or I will die. myself, but it does.
Don’t let my enemies gloat, saying, “We have
defeated him!” Don’t let them rejoice at my Then off I would go. There was laundry to do. A
downfall. But I trust in your unfailing love. difficult relationship to navigate. Babies to feed. My
I will rejoice because you have rescued me. coach to call.
I will sing to the Lord because he is good to me.
Psalm 13 Thought for today: I will remove from them their
heart of stone and give them a heart of flesh.
Then I’d whip out my school supplies and take Ezekiel 11:19
notes. I’d ask myself, What can even a dummy like
you deduce from this text? So here’s what I might
have written about Psalm 13.
58
Thought for tomorrow: I’m begging you to dig. questions will help you understand whether you’ve
Think. Ask. Ponder. Practice. Get coaching. You can made a step three decision—or not.
do it.
March 16
March 15
Scripture reading for today: Psalm 17, Proverbs 9;
Scripture reading for today: Psalm 16, Proverbs 8; Song of Solomon 4
Song of Solomon 3
This is a great devotional written by Dr. Dale Ryan.
There are some promises God gives to those who Before you proceed, let me point out one itsy‐bitsy
decide to turn both life and will over to His care… detail. He’s talking about believers—those who have
decided. Remember: coming to believe gives us the
I will remove from them their heart of stone and give capacity to find our freedom. The process of
them a heart of flesh. Ezekiel 11:19 developing the skill sets to access all of God’s big
God promises us a heart transplant. God promises promises to us is just that—a process. Before we
to change us. Our stone hearts will be removed and come to believe in a deciding‐kind of way, none of us
in their places will be put hearts of flesh. A heart of has this capacity. The capacity to find our freedom,
stone is a dead heart. It is closed to honest, intimate to know and do God’s will, to have the mind of
relationships. A heart of stone is unmerciful with Christ, etc.—that comes after the decision…
itself and with others. But we do become attached I love Dr. Ryan’s honesty. This is hard stuff, even
to our hearts of stone. And we find ourselves fearing for those who decide.
God's promised transplant. Our stone hearts have
one thing in their favor: they allow us to feel strong Christians do not believe about life that 'what
and to appear strong to others. A stone heart is a you see is what you get'.
protected heart. It seems invulnerable. You cannot Quite to the contrary, Christians believe that
wound a heart of stone. God's offer of a heart many things we cannot now see are still part of
transplant is a promise of life. A heart of flesh is God's plans for us. Some days we cannot see (or
alive. Only a flesh heart can feel joy. Only a flesh maybe even imagine) what it would be like to be
heart can celebrate. Only a heart of flesh can give completely recovered. But we know that this is
and receive love. But the vulnerability of a heart of God's plan for us. God is committed to our full
flesh scares us. A flesh heart does not seem as well recovery. As this text puts it, God will not be done
protected as a heart of stone. It can feel joy, but it with us until we are 'like him'. That is as 'recovered'
can also feel pain. You can wound a heart of flesh. as you can get. The clarity of God's plan for us can
God promises to change us. God will remove our give us hope. It may be a difficult journey, but you
hearts of stone and give us hearts of flesh. 13 can get somewhere from here. We can make it
What’s the state of your heart? because God is involved in the process of our
transformation. This hope can give us a kind of
Thought for today: For those who find me find life purity of purpose and vision. Because God is
and receive favor from the Lord. But those who fail committed to our full recovery, we are not alone
to find me harm themselves; all who hate me love with our hopes and dreams. Because God is
death. Proverbs 8:35‐36 (Today’s NIV) committed to our full recovery, we have a power
greater than our own to help with the struggle.
Thought for tomorrow: Okay, boys and girls. Here’s Because God is committed to our full recovery, we
your test. Are you lost or found? Do you take care of can find rest and courage in the purity of God's
yourself or harm yourself? Plan to succeed or vision for us. Because God is committed to our full
deliberately sabotage? How you answer these recovery, we can let go of our pathetic little idol
gods and turn to the true and living God. When we
worshipped a god‐of‐impossible‐expectations, we
13
Dale and Juanita Ryan, on line devotional from Rooted in God’s became driven and compulsive. When we
th
Love, March 14 .
59
worshipped a god‐who‐abused, we became fearful up all of God’s top performers and paraded both
and frozen. When we worshipped a god‐who‐ them and their accomplishments before us.
keeps‐his‐distance, we fought despair. As we begin Moses, a hero of the faithful, spoke honestly with
to see God as loving, we come to believe that we God about his doubts. You’d expect a bona fide hero
are lovable. As we begin to see that God wants us to say, “Sir, yes Sir. Thank you Sir.” He did not. Once
to let go of our self‐destructive behaviors in order you make a decision to turn your life over to God’s
to live more fully, we come to believe that we are care and control, you don’t become a robot. You’re
precious and valuable. 14 still you. A decision like this is one more step in the
process of coming to believe. It is not a magic pill, a
Thought for today: Dear friends, now we are lobotomy, or an easy way to rid yourself of all those
children of God, and what we will be has not yet hurts, habits, and hang‐ups that are trailing around
been made known. But we know that when he behind you like a well‐worn and smelly security
appears, we shall be like him, for we shall see him as blanket.
he is. Everyone who has this hope in him purifies
himself, just as he is pure. 1 John 3:2‐3 Thought for today: The Lord replied, “My presence
will go with you and I will give you rest.”
Thought for tomorrow: Take some time today to Then Moses said to him, “If your presence does not
journal. Put on your thinking cap. Think about all the go with us, do not send us up from here.” Exodus
things you’ve learned. Think about the limitations of 33:14‐15 NIV
the human spirit, and write out a list of things that
might naturally make it difficult to hope based on Thought for tomorrow: I recommend that you take
unseen things. Tell God this, and thank Him for his Hebrews 11, go to the back of your Bible (most have
supernatural provision. a concordance in the back listing key words/names
in scripture and where you can find them), and look
March 17 up each hero mentioned. Turn to all the places their
names are referenced in the Bible and make notes
Scripture reading for today: Psalm 18, Proverbs 10; about what you find. I suggest two columns: 1. Hero
Song of Solomon 5 for sure, and 2. Why I’m surprised God chose this
one. I want you to notice that these men and
You know about Moses, right? He was an Old women didn’t make it into the heroes’ chapter by
Testament hero. If Moses were around today, he’d being good, behaving best, or even simply by not
have made it into the final round of God’s version of messing up. By faith is why they are there. They
“American Idol.” In fact, perhaps he did make it believed.
there:
By faith Moses, when he had grown up, refused to March 18
be known as the son of Pharaoh’s daughter. He
chose to be mistreated along with the people of God Scripture reading for today: Psalms 19 and 20,
rather than to enjoy the pleasures of sin for a short Proverbs 11
time. He regarded disgrace for the sake of Christ as
of greater value than the treasures of Egypt, because In a recovery ministry, I get to watch families deal
he was looking ahead to his reward. By faith he…By with events that any sane person would
faith he…By faith…Hebrews 11:24‐29 NIV acknowledge as very shame inducing. It’s
Chapter 11 in the book of Hebrews is scripture’s embarrassing to acknowledge that your child has
version of the American Idol All‐Star finals. It’s the been stealing from the family business to keep up
place where the author of Hebrews sort of gathered with gambling debts. It’s extremely embarrassing to
see dad’s face on the front page of the local
newspaper because he got arrested in a prostitution
drag net. It’s mortifying to have mom show up for a
14
Dale and Juanita Ryan, on line devotional from Rooted in God’s parent/teacher conference drunk as a skunk.
th
Love, March 13 .
60
“God is very disappointed in you, and so am I.” • God is disappointed with ____ (me, my child,
These are the best words a father could come up my spouse, etc.)
with after he bailed his adult child out of jail. And Step three is our opportunity to make a decision
hey, I’m not slamming dear old dad. All of us have about who we think God is – it’s important to know
the inclination to take God and lower Him to our the character of the one in whom we’re being asked
level. Disappointment is a natural, normal human to cast our lot with. I believe that many of us take
emotion when one runs face to face with the the attributes of the people who have been most
shattering of all illusions. influential in our lives (for good or evil) and heap
But natural and normal isn’t God’s way. them onto our image of God. Pause to prepare. If
that is true for you, how close do you think your
Thought for today: Do not be afraid; you will not opinions of God align with what is true of God?
suffer shame. Do not fear disgrace; you will not be
humiliated. Isaiah 54:4 NIV Thought for today: I will not leave you as orphans; I
will come to you. John 14:18 Scripture is a great
Thought for tomorrow: Sometimes giving human place to seek out a sense of who God is. I found
attributes to heavenly God makes us afraid to cast great comfort in John 14:18 when I discovered it for
our lives into His hands. Fear not. He will not shame the first time. God won’t leave us as orphans – God
us, humiliate us, or disgrace us. He will, however, comes to us. He doesn’t make us search for him in a
heal us, restore us, renew us, and fulfill His promises game of heavenly hide and seek. He comes to us.
to us. He desires relationship with us. That’s a God I want
to get to know.
March 19
Thought for tomorrow: Why not take some time
Scripture reading for today: Psalm 21, Proverbs 12; this year to explore who God is, recognizing that we
Song of Solomon 6 all have opinions about God that may be, well,
wrong.
An honest witness tells the truth, but a false
witness tells lies. The words of the reckless pierce March 20
like swords, but the tongue of the wise brings
healing. Proverbs 12:17‐18 NIV Scripture reading for today: Psalm 22, Proverbs 13;
I’ve spent a lot of years listening to lots of people Song of Solomon 7 and 8
share their opinions about who God is and what He
is up to in this world. Here’s a sampling of some Misery loves company. At least that’s true for me.
opinions I’ve heard in recent weeks: In Psalm 22, David crafts a psalm that is right up my
• I think God has abandoned me. alley. He starts out fussing at God for being so
• God is punishing me unfairly. distant, praises God for his saving power, moves on
• When God was handing out the good stuff, he to a self‐pitying tirade (“But I am a worm, not a
skipped me. human being; I am scorned by everyone, despised by
• God is so far away. the people. All who see me mock me…”), expresses
• God doesn’t care about my problems. appreciation for God’s provision for him, rushes back
• When I pray, it feels like there’s a glass ceiling to his own personal tale of woes, begs God to come
between my prayers and God – I feel very far quickly and save him, bargains with God that he will
away from Him. publicly praise Him, and then actually does it. You
• God could have stopped these bad things from can almost hear the switch click as David slips into
happening to me and he did not. worship. All the things He can remember about
• What God? God is for the weak. (A sentiment God’s character he begins to sing in these final
I happen to agree with. Unlike mankind, who verses.
seems to despise weakness, God does not. And in the midst of this reading, my misery finds
God is FOR the weak. But I digress.) company. I am comforted by the fact that believing
61
doesn’t have to mean being perpetually perky. I am Would you agree that if Moses says his people
renewed as I realize that one can worship God and need a shepherd, then he is implying that his people
feel far away from His saving touch, simultaneously. are like sheep? Sheep receive more attention in the
If I were God, I couldn’t handle all this messiness! Bible than any other animal. By 3000 B.C. sheep
Fortunately for everyone, I am not God. were domesticated (probably before cattle). They
were important in every area of an Israelite’s life:
Thought for today: The Lord is my shepherd, I lack civic, religious and domestic. Abel, one of the sons of
nothing. Psalm 23:1 (Today’s NIV) Adam, was the first recorded shepherd (Gen. 4:2).
Shepherds had such an arduous task of sheep‐
Thought for tomorrow: Sometimes when I’m in a herding that any decent shepherd knew every
funky place, I don’t want to hear the theologically individual sheep by name. A shepherd, much like a
sound answer; I just want to know that someone parent of the very young, couldn’t leave those
understands my pain. I don’t even want someone to critters alone for a second without fear of them
give me a gentle and kind word of correction; I just wandering off and getting lost.
want someone to listen to my story. There will come Sheep are always led, never driven. (This will be a
a time when the theologically sound answer is not very important point to remember.) Sheep are
only what I want, but what I desperately need. A gregarious; we would call them extroverts! They do
gentle and kind word of correction is one of the not like to be alone. A happy sheep requires a
grandest acts of love that can be bestowed upon minimum of four other sheep to hang with. That’s
another, when it is properly timed. One of the things what the experts say. Another thing about sheep:
I love about God is His masterful timing. He knows they are easily led, even astray. They will follow
when to let us vent, and when to reel us in. I want to whoever is at the front of the pack, even to their
encourage you today. Although we humans don’t own peril! That’s why sheep need a good shepherd
always have God’s impeccable timing, God himself to keep them from danger. They also are defenseless
does. May today be a day you take your messy ball when it comes to their natural habitat predators.
of yarn called life to Him, so that you too, like David, Scientists believe that sheep intuitively know that
can experience God’s perfecting timing. their only safety comes in staying together.
Shepherds are often the only line of defense
March 21 between a sheep and another animal looking for a
tasty meal.
Scripture reading for today: Psalm 23; Judges 1 and A good shepherd cares deeply for the herd.
2 (Psalm 23 is going to pop up regularly in the Shepherds have several tools that assist them in
remainder of this devotional guide. I hope you come effective shepherding: a sling (think David and
to love and appreciate it as much as I do!) Goliath), a rod (a stick about 30 inches long with a
knob on one end), a flute (to play for amusement
Anyone interested in hiring a good shepherd? and to calm the sheep), and a staff (a walking cane
Today we aspire to be actors, lawyers, financial with a crook on the end.) I’ve never been a
planners, doctors, computer gurus, mechanics, rock shepherd, but I’m told that a shepherd sometimes
stars—pretty much anything but a shepherd. But uses the crook to hoist lost sheep out of gullies and
back in the day, way back when the scriptures were such. For certain, the shepherd’s job was always to
being crafted, to be a shepherd was a pretty big get the sheep safely home—often in spite of
deal. It was also a big deal to be shepherd‐less. themselves.
Moses said to the Lord, “May the Lord, the God of God himself is compared to a shepherd: But he
the spirits of all mankind, appoint a man over this brought his people out like a flock; he led them like
community to go out and come in before them, one sheep through the desert. Psalm 78:52 NIV
who will lead them out and bring them in, so the And just in case we miss that comparison, we, His
Lord’s people will not be like sheep without a people, are like sheep: Know that the Lord is God. It
shepherd.” Numbers 27:15‐17 NIV is He who made us, and we are His; we are His
people, the sheep of his pasture. Psalm 100:3 NIV
62
Thought for tomorrow: “For I know the plans I have
Thought for today: “ Look at the proud! They trust in for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you
themselves, and their lives are crooked. But the and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a
righteous will live by their faithfulness to God.” future.” Jeremiah 29:11 NIV
Habakkuk 2:4 NLT It’s in Christ that we find out who we are and what
we are living for. Long before we first heard of Christ
Thought for tomorrow: When one decides to turn and got our hopes up, he had his eye on us, had
their life and will over to the care and control of designs on us for glorious living; part of the overall
God, it just may be the single most important purpose he is working out in everything and
decision they ever make. It’s a decision made in everyone. Ephesians 1:11 The Message
humility – when one recognizes his need for a
shepherd. So I ask you: Are you in need of a good March 23
shepherd?
Scripture reading for today: Psalm 23; Judges 5 and
March 22 6

Scripture reading for today: Psalm 23; Judges 3 and Perhaps you can relate to my story. Recently, I lost
4 my God‐confidence. Do you remember the scene in
Peter Pan when one of his fellow lost boys misplaced
Sheep don’t wake up every morning with the his marbles? I felt like that guy. I completely lost my
intentions of escaping their shepherd or their flock. God‐confidence and feared I would never find it. Oh,
As we learned yesterday, sheep love to hang with I looked for it; I wondered where I left it; I shamed
each other, and they come when the shepherd calls. myself for losing it; I even looked for someone to
But what happens when they unintentionally blame for taking it. Nothing changed—I was still
wander too far away? What happens when they get without my God‐confidence—and feeling very, very
out of range of their shepherd’s voice? And even lonely. I wondered about my step three experience;
more distressing: what happens when they get had I really “decided?” If so, then why did I feel so
paired with a sloppy shepherd? decidedly unfound? Then I stumbled across this
In the absence of other data, I think we tend to scripture.
assume that God is like the authority figures of our For this is what the sovereign Lord says: I myself
“seen world” experiences. Sometimes we’ve been will search for my sheep and look after them. As a
shepherded sloppily, and this makes trusting God shepherd looks after his scattered flock when he is
hard. If we’re going to make a decision involving with them, so will I look after my sheep. I will rescue
trust, there is nothing wrong with asking the them from all the places where they were scattered
question: Can I safely trust God with my life? Ask on a day of clouds and darkness. I will bring them out
away. But remember, it is possible that human from the nations and gather them from the
shepherds, sloppy in their shepherding skills, may countries, and I will bring them into their own land. I
have led you to some false beliefs about who God is, will pasture them on the mountains of Israel, in the
how He loves, what He desires, and where He wants ravines and in all the settlements in the land. I will
to lead you. tend them in a good pasture, and the mountain
heights of Israel will be their grazing land. There they
Thought for today: My people have been lost sheep; will lie down in good grazing land, and there they will
their shepherds have led them astray and caused feed in a rich pasture on the mountains of Israel. I
them to roam on the mountains. They wandered myself will tend my sheep and have them lie down,
over mountain and hill and forgot their own resting declares the Sovereign Lord. I will search for the lost
place. Whoever found them devoured them. and bring back the strays. I will bind up the injured
Jeremiah 50:6‐7 NIV and strengthen the weak…Ezekiel 34:11‐16 NIV
I stopped reading. I felt lost; I thought perhaps in
some subtle way I had strayed. I hurt as one injured
63
does, and I certainly was weak. But what good news! this: if ministers don’t struggle, then I must not be a
Because the Lord, the good shepherd, says to me, minister! I struggle—not all the time, but sometimes.
and to you, that He will look after us, He will rescue If I’m brutally honest, I’d say I struggle with some
us, He will bring us from afar—to our own land. He degree of regularity. I’m okay with that, and here’s
will give us a safe place to rest and an abundant why:
place to eat. God Himself will seek out and find us. Jesus went through all the towns and villages,
It’s not up to us to work out our own path of teaching in their synagogues, preaching the good
restoration; God does that. My mind jumped ahead news of the kingdom and healing every disease and
to the New Testament, an old favorite verse of mine, sickness. When he saw the crowds, he had
forgotten in the land of lost where I had just compassion on them, because they were harassed
moments ago resided. In a blink of an eye I and helpless, like sheep without a shepherd.
recaptured my marbles—well, my God‐confidence, Matthew 9:35‐36 NIV
at least!
My good shepherd knows that I will struggle, and He
Thought for today: For it is God who works in you to loves me anyway. When I am harassed and helpless,
will and to act according to his good purpose. He is filled with compassion. This good shepherd, the
Philippians 2:13 NIV son of God, came for the very purpose of bringing
good news to me—a desperately devoted follower
Thought for tomorrow: Maybe you can’t relate to who sometimes feels simply desperate. We, like
me. But if you can, may I suggest that for today, stop sheep, were created to need the Shepherd. Although
running around like a lost sheep. Sit quietly, bow it is true that I am often powerless, it is always true
your head, and listen for the voice of the good that He is powerful beyond all comprehension. If
shepherd. Do you hear Him? He’s wooing you. He’s you’ve felt like a lost sheep lately, will you take the
calling you back. He’s saying, come, find your way time now to accept the compassion of the great
back to me. It is here that you will discover all that healer himself: Jesus?
you truly need. It is possible for me to live without
my marbles, but I’ve learned that it is impossible for Thought for today: When he saw the crowds, he had
me to live peacefully apart from God. I’ve spent a lot compassion on them, because they were harassed
of time blaming myself and others for my restless and helpless, like sheep without a shepherd.
spirit. I’m choosing to set all that blame aside for Matthew 9:35‐36 NIV
today and instead, ponder this wondrous truth:
there is a God who is wooing me. Thought for tomorrow: Sometimes it’s easy to get
the false impression that step three is a once‐and‐
March 24 done kind of proposition. You decide; God concurs.
Bam. You’re in the fold. My experience is more like
Scripture reading for today: Psalm 23; Judges 7 and the laundry at my house. In a home full of
8 adolescents and adults who like to run and jump and
get really dirty, we need daily laundry runs to keep
Once, I was delivering a message at NorthStar up with all our dirty clothes. When I get busy and
Community, where I have been give the job title distracted and forget to throw in the laundry each
“minister.” I was talking about a personal spiritual day, this chore quickly becomes messy and
struggle, and this outburst of truthfulness elicited an unmanageable. I get really cranky when this
unsolicited response. A visitor to our community happens. I can honestly say I have days when I forget
came up and with great passion and no small that I ever decided to trust God. And you know
amount of agitation expressed her profound shock what? Very quickly my life gets messy and
that I would dare suggest that I struggle. unmanageable, and I get really cranky. So like my
“How can you say that? You’re a minister! You’re laundry, I’ve found myself in need of a daily decision:
not supposed to struggle!” she exclaimed. I’m not is today a day when I decide to trust God with my
sure where this lady got her information. I only know
64
life, or is it one of those days when I grow forgetful Thought for tomorrow: Have you wandered from
and choose to ignore God’s voice? the protection of your Good Shepherd? Have you
forgotten that your safety is found in the shadow of
March 25 the Prince of Peace? Have you been looking for love,
peace, rest, and respect in all the wrong places? Ask
Scripture reading for today: Psalm 23; Judges 9 and the Lord to show you today how you have been a
10 virtual enemy of the Good Shepherd. Ask Him to
reveal to you the ways you’ve lost your focus. Listen
In case you haven’t noticed, Jesus was a very to His voice as He speaks gently to you about the
polarizing force in history. During his time on earth, important truths that have escaped your attention.
he was both beloved and betrayed. He had a Ask Jesus to open your mind so that you can
relatively brief period of public ministry—about understand the scriptures. Ask God to give you an
three years—then he was crucified. But the story unquenchable thirst for His word and an unwavering
didn’t end with his heart‐wrenching death, of commitment to peer intently into it. Then expect an
course. Three days later, he arose from the grave. He answer.
hung out for awhile, returning to his disciples, re‐
teaching and re‐casting his vision for their future You are far more valuable to God than you may
(and his). During the time following his resurrection realize. You can trust Him with your life.
and before His return to heaven, Luke (a doctor and
chronicler of the life and times of Jesus) said this March 26
about Jesus: Then he opened their minds so they
could understand the Scriptures (Luke 24:45). Think Scripture reading for today: Psalm 23; Judges 11 and
about it. These were his disciples—his desperately 12
devoted followers. These guys had left everything
for him, yet even they still needed Jesus to open Jesus loved to tell stories. Here’s one He told:
their minds so they could understand the scriptures! “What do you think? If a man owns a hundred
If the disciples, taught by the master himself, needed sheep, and one of them wanders away, will he not
all this coaching, do you think that we can expect to leave the ninety‐nine on the hills and go to look for
need some remedial assistance too? Listen to the the one that wandered off? And if he finds it, I tell
voice of Jesus: you the truth, he is happier about that one sheep
“If any of you has a sheep and it falls into a pit on than about the ninety‐nine that did not wander off.
the Sabbath, will you not take hold of it and lift it In the same way your Father in heaven is not willing
out?” How much more valuable is a man than a that any of these little ones should be lost.” Matthew
sheep!” Matthew 12:11‐12 NIV 18:12‐14 NIV
The context of this conversation is vital. Jesus was I’ve heard it said that we get our first ideas about
just about to violate the rule of law of the Sabbath in who God is and who He is not by looking at our
favor of obeying the spirit of that same law. His earthly parents. I squirm at the thought. I have three
enemies, hoping to catch him in an act of children, and it would be a shame if their only
wrongdoing, used this as an excuse to plot his death. perspective of God came from their experiences
Jesus, knowing this, withdrew from that place. with their father and me. We’ve done our best—but
The fact that He was healing the sick escaped the I’m not in denial—we have had limitations as
attention of his accusers. Let’s not make the same imitators of Christ. I’m comforted, slightly, to know
mistake. The Lord is our shepherd. A good that we are not the only models that they have of
shepherd tends his flock—feeding them, watering God; we’re just the first. Have you gotten stuck in
them, and protecting them from harm. the rut of unbelief because of the limited examples
and experiences you’ve had that reveal the true
Thought for today: “How much more valuable is a character of God?
man than a sheep!” Matthew 12:12 NIV Jesus told a story to a crowd of people that reveals
the heart of His Father. He told his listeners that God
65
cared not just for the masses; He cared for even one did it wrong! Don’t do it the way we did; discuss this
lone sheep. He didn’t count heads and decide and other important issues before you get yourself
whether the numbers were significant enough for hitched. But the truth remains: Pete’s sudden
Him to make an appearance. This God that is far interest in all things God‐related startled me. I didn’t
beyond our understanding was willing to make know what to expect. I was afraid to ask. I did have
Himself available for just one. Would a celebrity of some knowledge of the twenty‐third Psalm…”The
our day make an appearance for just one? Would a Lord is my shepherd…” but I lacked understanding. I
political candidate show up at a rally where just one don’t think I am alone. People were pretty confused
would attend? Would a teacher come to school about what it meant to accept Jesus as the son of
every day with an awesome lesson plan for just one? God in Jesus’ day too. Some even thought he was
Would a pastor preach to a congregation of just demon‐possessed. In response, Jesus explained what
one? God would. Not only would He do it, He would it means to be one for whom the Lord is their
be thrilled to do so. Truly. His Son said so, and He shepherd:
should know. Jesus answered, “I did tell you, but you do not
believe. The miracles I do in my Father’s name speak
Thought for today: He (Jesus) had equal status with for me, but you do not believe because you are not
God but didn’t think so much of himself that he had my sheep. My sheep listen to my voice; I know them,
to cling to the advantages of that status no matter and they follow me. I give them eternal life, and they
what. Not at all. When the time came, he set aside shall never perish; no one can snatch them out of my
the privileges of deity and took on the status of a hand. My Father, who has given them to me, is
slave, became human! Having become human, he greater than all; no one can snatch them out of my
stayed human. It was an incredibly humbling Father’s hand. I and the Father are one.” John 10:22‐
process. He didn’t claim special privileges. Instead, 32 NIV
he lived a selfless, obedient life and then died a I’ve been finding my way back to God for many
selfless, obedient death – and the worst kind of years. My experience has been that the good
death at that: a crucifixion. Philippians 2:6‐8 The shepherd finds a way to speak to me, if I am willing
Message to listen. He’s never disrespected me by forcing His
will upon me. He never got behind me and pushed
Thought for tomorrow: Like Father, like son. Whom (like sheep, most of us can’t be driven—remember
do you want to grow up to be like? that sheep can only be led, not driven). Instead, He
has invited us to join Him in his grand epic
March 27 adventure.

Scripture reading for today: Psalm 23; Judges 13 and Thought for today: I am your Creator. You were in
14 my care even before you were born. Isaiah 44:2 (CEV)
You saw me before I was born and scheduled each
Daily devotions are so…private. No one needs to day of my life before I began to breathe. Every day
know the answer to this question. If decide that the was recorded in your Book! You know me Inside and
Lord is your shepherd, do you know what to expect? out, you know every bone in my body; You know
When I was growing up, I rarely went to church. exactly how I was sculpted from nothing into
After I was married, my husband informed me that something. Psalm 139:15‐16 (order reversed and
we were going to church. This came as news to me. taken from both the Living Bible and The Message)
Shhhh! We have a secret. Don’t spread this around,
we’re not proud of this, but it is the truth: we never Thought for tomorrow: I was once a very reluctant
talked about God or any spiritual matter of any follower. I didn’t know what to expect, and my fears
importance before we got married. I know, I know. held me back from running hard toward the Father. I
Don’t email me and suggest all those good books was afraid to even begin the journey, because I fully
available about healthy dating for Christians. We’ve expected to disappoint Him. I’ve learned a sacred
been married almost thirty years. We confess! We truth in my spiritual pilgrimage, and I count it a
66
privilege to share it: entering into a love relationship Thought for tomorrow: It’s easy to write a
with God is not a position secured by performance devotional series designed to convince you that God
and good behavior. You’ve had a place in His heart is worthy of our trust. It would be a piece of cake to
since before the first star was hung in the sky. passionately preach on how God meets our every
need. But you’re no fool. Easy talk of how God
March 28 prospers us and blesses us, while true, isn’t the full
story. You deserve better than someone like me
Scripture reading for today: Psalm 23; Judges 15 and trying to appeal to your basic instincts of lust and
16 desire. We’re almost finished with our month of
devotionals focused on step three: making a decision
My parents did a lot of things well. But they did to turn our life and will over to the care of God. Be
some things GREAT. Under this category falls the prepared. God and Santa are not the same
celebration of Christmas. No matter what (seasons individual. Santa is all about bringing good boys and
of financial feast or famine), Santa didn’t skimp at girls what they want; God is all about giving all his
the Joneses’ house. When Santa has an excellent children (both the naughty and nice) what they
track record for delivering the goods, kids get pretty need.
excited. We couldn’t wait for Santa to come. We
were so excited on Christmas Eve that my parents March 29
had to go to great lengths to keep us in bed—at least
for a few hours. Eventually my weary parents would Scripture reading for today: Psalm 23; Judges 17 and
drop off to sleep. One of the kids would rouse the 18
others and the four of us would bolt for the
Christmas tree. This was usually around four in the “I shall not be in want.” The Hebrew word in this
morning. I cannot think of a Christmas when my passage for ‘want’ is ‘haser.’ Literally, it means “to
every need and want was not met. (There was that lack, be without, decrease, be lacking, have a need.”
time when Santa left the light on my bike and the A possible paraphrase is, “The Lord is my shepherd, I
batteries ran out and were never replaced. I’m shall not lack; I shall not be without; I shall not
almost over that.) decrease; I shall not be lacking; I shall not have a
But here’s the thing about needs and wants. They need.” Wow. That’s a big deal.
keep changing. As passionately as I longed for the Early this morning, long before the sun peaked
Barbie doll playhouse, the ten‐speed bike, the desk through my windows, my phone rang. A distraught
set with a blotter in pink, the doll that was practically parent had just heard from the police. Their precious
alive, the new clothes, the new books, the jewelry, daughter is in jail. This is her third DUI. She’s 23
etc….was it enough? Did a time come when I said, years old, a single mother, and an alcoholic. “The
“Hey, folks, enough is enough. Last year, I got all I Lord is my shepherd, I shall not lack.” These parents
needed. This year, make sure Santa knows that I am are wondering how to apply this scripture as they
not in want. “ That never happened. Every year deal with some very tough issues.
brings a new set of needs and wants. But this Last week a young woman showed up in my office
passage says that I shall not be in want. So what after a busy weekend. She’d wiped out her college
does this mean? fund ‐ which was no small feat considering the
amount saved. This money symbolized the hopes
Thought for today: Don’t worry about anything; and dreams of her family. For them it spelled future
instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you and sacrifice. For her it spelled D‐R‐U‐G‐S. Her
need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you parents don’t know about the missing money, the
will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything drugs, or the “wanting” of this young woman.
we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts They’re still thinking that they are a family who is not
and minds as you live in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:6‐ in want. They’d tell you they have everything they
7 NLT need—the perfect family. “The Lord is my shepherd, I
shall not be without.” Soon these parents are going
67
to wonder how to apply this scripture to their the need, the want, the lacking, the Father’s gracious
perfectly need‐less life. hand was providing? Did God allow her a moment of
A few weeks ago my friend was struggling with a longing, so that in a few weeks she could experience
son who is driving her to distraction. He’s messing the joy of compassionate caring for another who
up; she’s trying to get it right as a parent—hard stuff. also felt alone?
She says, “I feel so alone.” I know she follows the
good shepherd. And yet she wants—she wants her Thought for today: My God will meet all your needs,
son to straighten out, her husband to continue to according to His riches in glory.
offer her support and encouragement, her friends to
surround her, and her church to uplift her. She’s Thought for tomorrow: As we conclude our time
working hard to figure out how to apply this together, ask God to show you His hand in your life.
scripture. Because like the rest of us, she assumes What we feel, what we want, what we desire, what
that if Psalm 23 is true, she shouldn’t feel so bad. we perceive we lack, fluctuates. One time I dreamed
“I shall not be in want.” Don’t take it lightly. It’s a that a Barbie dollhouse would satisfy my every
simple phrase, but not satisfying if viewed from a longing, but times have changed. What hasn’t
simplistic mindset. My friend, the follower of the changed is the very nature and character of God. Ask
good shepherd, expressed her perception of “want” Him to reveal His presence to you today. Perhaps
to her husband, to her friends, and to her church today is the day you’ll begin to realize that even your
community. As she asked, she received. She was unmet desires are part of a bigger picture, a grander
reminded that although she felt alone, the truth was purpose, an epic adventure that yet awaits you.
that she was not alone. She had her husband, her Perhaps all this renewal of mind will aid you in
friends, and her NorthStar Community. This is one making your decision about step three.
special lady, because her next choice proved pivotal.
She still felt alone. But she chose to trust the process March 30
of following. She chose to believe that she was not
alone. She allowed her community to show her a Scripture reading for today: Psalm 23; Judges 19
new way of believing, thinking, and trusting. She was and 20
choosing to follow because of her decision (to trust
in God) in spite of her feelings. “I shall not be in want.” Can you articulate what
The story doesn’t end there; just as your story you want and need, or are you like me? Every
doesn’t end with you! Today, another precious Sunday after church, my family sits down to a good
woman called me and said, “I feel so alone.” I old‐fashioned family dinner—at the restaurant of
listened to her story. The longer I listened, the more our choice! Getting to the restaurant is the hardest
I discovered that she was expressing a feeling, not a part of our day. It goes like this –
fact. She was not alone. So with fear and trepidation “Where do you want to eat?”
I ventured an observation, “It sounds to me like “I don’t know, where do you want to eat?”
you’re feeling alone, but you’ve given me several “I don’t know…”
examples that indicate that in fact, you are not Then, someone (never me) suggests a restaurant.
alone.” There was silence. This is followed by all the protests from the family
“You are right.” (I love those words.) She members who don’t want to eat there; these are the
proceeded to give me another example. She told me same family members who didn’t know or care
about a girlfriend who had told her, “You are not about our restaurant choice just moments ago. I
alone. You have me. You have your NorthStar never enter that discussion. I really don’t know
Community. We’ll get through this together.” Guess where I want to eat. I just go where the crowd takes
who spoke those words of comfort? Yes, it was my me.
friend who had lived those words and suffered the When we don’t know what we need or want–
same pain a few weeks before this gal called. when we are living as if we are “needless” and
Was the loneliness real? You bet. Did she have a “want‐less”—something is not right. Pia Mellody has
need, a want, a lacking? If so, could it be that even in written a wonderful book (which I highly
68
recommend) called Facing Codependency. In this Him, say, tomorrow morning until noon? Then re‐
book she offers insights that are both profound and evaluate. You could take it in one‐hour chunks. Blog
true about how find ourselves in a state of want‐ me and let me know how it’s going. Did you decide
lessness. on an hour or a day? I’d love to hear from you.
Even newborns have a way of expressing a need:
they cry. No one is confused when a healthy baby is March 31
in a state of want. We may not know the exact need,
but we will go to any lengths to discover it and Scripture reading for today: Psalm 23; Judges 21
rectify the situation. That’s healthy. But what if that
scenario is not normal? What if the baby is left to cry A few devotionals ago, I talked about my friend who
for hours on end? What if wet diapers aren’t had the courage to express her wanting, her
changed regularly? What if hunger isn’t addressed needing, her desiring. She said, “I feel alone.” Not
consistently? What if this state continues? What if a even a half‐hearted listener could miss the
young child is told to “Shut up!” or “Don’t feel that implications. She felt alone, but she longed for
way,” or “You’re wrong to think that Daddy doesn’t community. She desired a family that would love her
love you. Daddy loves you, but sometimes he can’t unconditionally and support her unequivocally. She
help himself. That’s why he hits you so hard.” What was having a rough time, and it felt bad. In her
if our every thought, feeling, need, and want is misery, she wanted company.
ignored? Will we learn to trust our instincts? Will we
learn how to name our true emotions, our deepest There’s a guy named Paul. Historians tell us that he
desires, our basic needs? And if we can name them, wrote a number of the books in the Bible, including
have we experienced a life that leads us to first and second Corinthians. I think Paul can relate
reasonably expect that they will be met? to my friend.

Thought for today: The apostle Paul says, “I have Thought for today: Praise be to the God and Father
learned to be content in all circumstances…” (Not of our Lord and Jesus Christ, the Father of
the same thing as “needless and wantless” – compassion and the God of all comfort, who
contentment is a beautiful thing!) comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can
comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we
Thought for tomorrow: Not caring where you eat is ourselves have received from God. For just as the
no big deal if your family can be trusted to choose sufferings of Christ flow over into our lives, so also
wisely. But not being able to recognize your wants through Christ our comfort overflows. If we are
and needs‐‐that’s a big deal. Today, make a distressed, it is for your comfort and salvation, if we
conscious choice to think about what you want and are comforted, it is for your comfort, which produces
what you need. Pay attention to the hand of God in you patient endurance of the same sufferings we
moving in mysterious ways to provide for you. suffer. And our hope for you is firm, because we
know that just as you share in our sufferings, so also
Sometimes big pronouncements aren’t the best you share in our comfort. 2 Corinthians 1:3‐7 NIV
kinds of decisions. Big pronouncements may be too
hard to swallow. Instead of deciding today to trust Thought for tomorrow: Sometimes we cry out, like
God with every single detail of your life, why not a newborn baby, and it seems that no one hears.
start smaller and see what happens? Ask God, “Lord, Worse, we conclude that no one cares. What if there
show me the way you’d have me go today.” is more going on in our lives than we can know?
Perhaps tomorrow would be a good day to practice. What if there’s a larger purpose, a grander
Take just one day, and ask God: “How would you adventure, a greater “YES!” awaiting us—but for
have me live today? If I truly trusted you with today, now, on this day—we must wait. It’s at times like
what would be my next right step?” Then take it. this when a good decision comes in handy. The
Then ask the question again, and take that step. If decision has been made; we’ve chosen to trust God
tomorrow seems like too big a decision, why not give with the messiness of our lives. Instead of revisiting
69
the decision, we can move forward to solve the STEP 4 We made a searching and fearless moral
problem: we feel in want, but we know God meets inventory of ourselves.
our needs. We feel bad, but we know there are more
explanations than we possess at the moment. We April 1
can pause to prepare because first we decided to
believe. Scripture reading for today: Psalm 120, Judges 6 and
It is on days like this that it helps to remember, 2 Peter 1. Pay special attention to verses 3‐11 in 2
“The Lord is my shepherd.” The question that Peter.
remains is: will you follow? I hope today you will
take a moment and speak of your wants and needs Today we turn our attention to step four—making
to the Father. Having come clean with the unmet a searching and fearless moral inventory of
desires of your heart, I pray that you will be willing ourselves. This step is going to require courage.
to stick around and trust Him for the answer. Thankfully, God did not give his children a spirit of
timidity, but of power, love, and sound mind. We’re
going to need His power, His love, and the mind of
Christ to take this next step.
I find that self‐objectivity is a difficult task. It feels
burdensome at times. But learning how to see
myself accurately enables me to understand how
others see me. And why should that matter? Isn’t
other people’s opinions of me their problem, not
mine? Well….not exactly.
From the beginning of time, God has had us in His
mind, and He created us as relational beings. We
weren’t meant to live in isolation. In fact, when Jesus
was asked to name the most important
commandment, He couldn’t do it. He instead named
two: love God and love others (as you love yourself).
Isn’t that fascinating? He didn’t command them to
achieve world peace, end poverty, or fight for the
rights of the underprivileged. That’s not what He
said. He said: love God, love others, love self. We
love in the context of community. It’s all about
relationships.
So it does matter how other people “see us.” How
we relate to others and how others relate to us will
be key ingredients in our ability to follow those two
commandments that Jesus couldn’t separate.
Once I was walking out of a store, and my son
evidently watched me trudge across the parking lot.
When I climbed in the car, he asked, “Mom, are you
okay?”
“Yes, son, I’m fine. Why do you ask?”
“Your face looked kind of stressed.”
“It does? Thanks for telling me; I was just thinking.
I feel happy on the inside; my outsides must not
match!”

70
He continued, “My friends tell me that I look goodness and love will follow me all the days of my
stressed when I walk around, even when I don’t feel life, And I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever.
that way.” Psalm 23
“Huh,” I said. “I guess that’s why I ask you if you’re I shall not be in want. I shall not be in want. Can
stressed when I pick you up from school. You walk you imagine never being in want? Before we get into
out looking stressed. You and I must have faces on a discussion about not being in want, let’s review.
the outside that don’t always match our true “The Lord is my shepherd…” is the precursor to “I
feelings.” shall not be in want.” Think of the first verse of
“I asked my friends: should I look like this?” He Psalms like an “If…then” statement. Verse one
makes an exaggerated happy face that could not reframed says, If the Lord is my shepherd, then I shall
possibly be considered an upgrade in facial not be in want. This state of satisfaction and
expressions. I laughed. He’s a funny guy. contentment does not come with a pair of ruby red
“Maybe we should think about why people see us slippers like Dorothy wore in The Wizard of Oz. We
differently than we see ourselves.” can’t just click our heels together and hope that all
“I guess.” He has finished with the conversation, our needs will be met. No—learning how to live
but I hadn’t. I realized that I learned a valuable contently presumes that we’ve made the decision to
lesson that day—thanks to my boy. These kinds of follow God. If I am to be a person who is not in a
lessons and more await us as we enter into the perpetual state of “wanting,” then I’d better figure
fourth‐step process. out what it means to follow the good shepherd. Step
four is the next step in developing a skill that will
Thought for today: Some of our persistent hurts, enable us to do just that.
habits, and hang‐ups are annoyingly resistant to You must pay close attention to what they wrote
removal because we don’t see ourselves accurately. (“they” being those who witnessed the splendor of
No wonder we end up confused about why others Jesus), for their words are like a lamp shining in a
respond to us the way they do! If Michael and I are dark place—until the Day dawns, and Christ the
walking around looking grumpy, who wants to hug a Morning Star shines in your hearts. Above all, you
porcupine? We’re walking around wondering why must realize that no prophecy in Scripture ever came
people are avoiding us, while people are avoiding us from the prophet’s own understanding, or from
because of the way our faces look while we’re human initiative. NO, those prophets were moved by
walking around. Does that make sense? Step four the Holy Spirit, and they spoke from God. 2 Peter
will help us understand this stuff. 1:19‐21 NLT
So now you see. Part of deciding to trust means
Thought for tomorrow: Let a man examine himself. that we must pay attention to those things that God
1 Corinthians 11:28 NIV says are true, even when those true things don’t
match our current life experience.
April 2
Thought for today: You shall know the truth, and
Scripture reading for today: Psalm 121, 2 Peter 2 the truth shall make you free. John 8:32
and 3
Thought for tomorrow: Don’t forget: first we’ve
The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not be in want. He acknowledged our powerlessness and life
makes me lie down in green pastures, He leads me unmanageability, second we came to believe that
beside quiet waters, He restores my soul. He guides God could restore us, and then we took the third
me in paths of righteousness for his name’s sake. step—deciding to entrust ourselves to God. Now
Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow we’re on step four. Implied in the first three steps is
of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your the acknowledgement that you and I have struggled
rod and your staff, they comfort me. You prepare a with seeing God, ourselves, and others accurately.
table before me in the presence of my enemies. You Our reality confusion may be because we don’t have
anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows. Surely the necessary skill sets and/or we really don’t want
71
to see the real deal. This needs to change. We need Thought for tomorrow: Reading through 1 Peter
to wrestle with the truth. God says He is our reminds me that God has some strong opinions
shepherd and we will not be in want—against the about the kind of person He wants me to become.
backdrop of our perceived reality—we want we There are some rights and wrongs. And since I’ve
want we want. Step four will help us sort out our turned my life over to Him, I’m accepting the reality
perceptions and reality. that as He is Creator God, I must take His perspective
seriously. No more doing my own thing; I now have a
April 3 higher authority that I am learning how to listen to!
Early in my own recovery journey, I frankly could
Scripture reading for today: 1 Peter 1‐5 not do an accurate step four. I lacked perspective. I
was extremely self‐unaware. I was defensive (and
As we march through our fourth step in this still am lots of days). I didn’t even know how to
month’s devotional series, I hope you’ll grab a Step 4 evaluate my life. What was I supposed to use as an
Study Guide. You can find one on our Web site evaluative guide? How could I list my problem areas
(www.northstarcommunity.com). This is the kind of when I wasn’t sure if the “problem” I was listing was
step that requires a good bit of explanation, and I’m mine or someone else’s? (For me, blaming is easier
not going to attempt that in this devotional series. than taking ownership.) I found it helpful to ask
It’s my prayer that this month will raise our God, over and over, to “show me what you want me
awareness. Since we have acknowledged to see about myself.” For me, it was very helpful to
powerlessness and unmanageability, figured out that regularly read scripture. It gave me a framework for
God exists, and decided to give Him control of our self‐evaluation that was very helpful (and sometimes
lives, we’ve got some choices to make. painful.)
The fourth step requires us to take time and
examine our lives—thoroughly, honestly, and April 4
reflectively. Have you ever had to complete an
inventory of your home? Take a moment and think Scripture reading for today: 1 Chronicles 1 and 2;
about writing down every single thing that you have Romans 1
in your house. Don’t forget the junk under the
kitchen sink! The attic counts! Yes, you need to write According to The Twelve Steps for Christians, “A
down everything in the basement too. This step is moral inventory is a list of our weaknesses and our
just like that, except it is an inventory of ourselves— strengths.” And so I ask you: who decides what is
our assets, our feelings, our decisions, our weak and what is strong? Here’s the thing: one
resentments and fears, our grudges and injuries, man’s weakness can be viewed as another man’s
wrongs done, and problem areas—the complete strength.
package. Example: Before I say this, know that I am not at
During our devotional time this month, I’m going all making a political statement, so don’t get all
to be straight up with you: I want you to be stirred in upset by this. Just read it. I was listening to a talk
new ways to think about who you are and who you radio host talking about how brave and courageous
want to become. I want you to seriously consider the George Bush is in regards to his protective measures
possibility that a thorough inventory might be in on behalf of our country; this person sees the
your best interests. president’s actions as strong. Another guy I was
listening to said Bush is a bully and has unresolved
Thought for today: Now, who will want to harm you hostility issues. So in this man’s view, Bush’s
if you are eager to do good? But even if you suffer behavior is a sign of weakness. All I’m saying here is
for doing what is right, God will reward you for it. So that taking an inventory requires prayer, because it
don’t worry or be afraid of their threats. Instead, isn’t an easy thing to do with rigorous honesty and
you must worship Christ as lord of your life. accuracy.
1 Peter 3:13, 14 NLT

72
Another example: I’m on a plane this morning, One style of inventory is taking our lives in five‐
flying to visit my mom for her birthday, and I am year chunks. This was tough for me, so I ditched that
reading a sales catalog with a lot of pithy sayings: idea. I decided if that didn’t work, I’d try another
• “Resolve to succeed. The greatest discovery one approach. So I did further research, and found
can make is that nothing is impossible.” Really? Do another recommended style of inventory – and wow
you agree? Is there anything that you have – it was awesome. It was hard, but it was awesome.
resolved to succeed at (such as weight loss, For a recovering codependent, it would have been
abstinence from a particular substance, or even easier to just keep plunking away at that five‐year
becoming a saintly, patient person) and failed? increment idea. Frankly, it took courage to admit
How will you inventory that situation? defeat. But that’s okay. A way was found.
• “Excellence is the result of caring more than others So, my friend, be of good courage. And forget
think is wise, risking more than others think is safe, about that roar. Just join me and say, “I will try again
dreaming more than others think is practical, and tomorrow.”
expecting more than others think is possible.” Now
that’s inspiring, but is it an indicator of strength Thought for today: Or do you show contempt for
(big faith) or codependent folly? I don’t know! the riches of his kindness, tolerance, and patience,
And it is for this very reason that I beg you to learn not realizing that God’s kindness leads you toward
how to pray. Inventories can only be accomplished repentance? Romans 2:4 NIV
with God’s help. I’m not asking you to become a
monk, just start like this: “Lord, show me what you Thought for tomorrow: I suspect that many of us
want me to see.” Now that’s a good beginning. think that this fourth step is a cruel attempt to
further deflate our already shaky self‐esteem.
Thought for today: When we lose our conscious Maybe that’s why we avoid it so aggressively. It is
contact with God, or never pursue it, yucky things not. God’s intentions spring from His loving kindness
happen. (not out of a critical spirit), out of His patience (not
“For although they knew God, they neither His wrath). You can do this.
glorified him as God nor gave thanks to him, but
their thinking became futile and their foolish hearts April 6
were darkened.” Romans 1:21 NIV
Scripture reading for today: 1 Chronicles 5 and 6;
Thought for tomorrow: Folks, it could happen. As Romans 3
you wade through your fourth step, keep reviewing
steps one, two, and three. If we try to do an Recently I engaged in a lengthy conversation with
inventory strictly by our own wits, we may reap a person who is new to the recovery process. My
futility and foolishness. new friend was adamant that the fourth step was a
ridiculous waste of time. I’m familiar with this
April 5 perspective; no one I know ever really embarked on
this step with unbridled enthusiasm and vim, vigor,
Scripture reading for today: 1 Chronicles 3 and 4; and vitality. My experience is that either we prefer
Romans 2 to pretend that we don’t have any issues to
inventory OR we’re overwhelmed with the shame of
I saw this sign while I was flying to Atlanta. our own sense of inadequacy. Either response tends
“Courage does not always roar. Sometimes, it is the to make us run from the process. But this gal that I
quiet voice at the end of the day saying, ‘I will try was talking to had a different view. Here are her
again tomorrow.’” I love this. That’s a great attitude reasons (in no particular order of priority) for why
to adopt as we take our inventory. We may have she is in need of recovery but not in need of
some false starts. That’s okay. We can always say, “I completing a moral inventory:
will try again tomorrow.” • Her life is too stressful; her ex‐husband is a jerk.
73
• Her life is miserable; her children take advantage Paul states that it is Abraham’s faith that was the
of her. truly great thing about him. In terms of walking
• Her boss fired her; she has no clue why. through the steps, that means he clearly marched
She thinks all those folks should take stock of their right through steps one, two, and three. And, if we
lives; she is FINE! (F‐freaked out, I‐insecure, N‐ were in a third‐grade Sunday School class, perhaps
neurotic, E‐emotional). I’d hammer that point home for a while and move
on.
Thought for today: There is no one righteous, not But we’re not. We’re grown‐ups. We can face the
even one; there is no one who understands, no one facts. Abraham’s behavior was not always in sync
who seeks God. All have turned away, they have with his bold believing. Abraham certainly could
together become worthless; there is no one who have benefited from a fourth‐step inventory. (If you
does good, not even one…for all have sinned and fall are interested, find a Bible with a concordance, look
short of the glory of God. Romans 3:10‐12, 23 NIV up “Abraham,” and read all about his life. Remember
that his behaving was often suspect, but he was
Thought for tomorrow: I really don’t know my new declared “righteous” by God. Think about it.)
friend well enough to know if less stress, better kids, Anyone who is brave enough to work through a
and a friendly ex would make her life addiction free. complete moral inventory asks a question: what do I
But scripture tells me this: all of us fall short. So as see when I examine myself? Erwin McManus, in his
long as she is distracted by the sins of her ex, her book Soul Cravings, writes about this experience as a
kids, her former boss, etc., how does that help her? child:
I can relate to my friend; it’s easy for me to believe This is a question I was asked to face years ago
that the people in my life that “cause” me problems when I found myself desperately struggling to
have sinned and fallen short. All sarcasm aside, that understand myself, trying to measure the weight of
may be true. But it is not all of the truth. In fact, all this one life. ‘What do you see?’ Even at twelve I
of us, each of us, every single one of us—have issues knew this was a trick question. It really is a good
that need addressing. Step four gives us an question, though. Your retina may be necessary for
opportunity to consider what OUR issues are. sight, but your soul definitely shapes what you see.
Frankly, that lady I listened to sounded ridiculous My soul was confused and cold and growing
blaming so many people for her troubles while she calloused, and I was quickly becoming blind to so
was the one sitting in a jail cell. Honestly, that’s how many things. When your soul is sick, one of the
you and I sound too. It’s silly to waste our time symptoms is blindness. Bitterness, for instance, is like
thinking about someone else’s inevitable a cancer that makes you blind. I had allowed hurt to
shortcomings when we’ve got a few of our own to make my soul toxic. Bitterness is the enemy of love
acknowledge. So, go start taking ownership of YOUR because it makes you unforgiving and unwilling to
stuff. give love unconditionally. It is the enemy of hope
because you keep living in the past and become
April 7 incapable of seeing a better future. It is the enemy of
faith because you stop trusting in anyone but
Scripture Reading for today: 1 Chronicles 7 and 8; yourself. 15
Romans 4
Thought for today: If any of you lacks wisdom, he
In our reading today, Paul (the author of the book should ask God, who gives generously to all without
of Romans) discusses Abraham’s “greatness.” finding fault, and it will be given to him. James 1:5
Abraham was a historical figure to the Jewish NIV
people—a true hero. Paul asks why he is such a
hero. Is it because of the great things he did? What
kinds of things constitute “great things?” He quotes
scripture in Romans 4:3: “Abraham believed God,
15
and it was credited to him as righteousness.” Ahhhh. Soul Cravings, by Erwin Raphael McManus, Nelson Books,
Introduction to “Cravings” pages unnumbered.
74
Thought for tomorrow: I am comforted by the possible ways we can behave badly. So let’s reframe
messy life of Abraham. Frankly, sometimes I fear this verse in NSC lingo: While we were still living
careful self‐examination because I am so scared of independently of God (going our own way, making
what I’ll find. Why? Because I’m afraid if I our own decisions, deciding for ourselves what was
acknowledge the truth, it will make it more real. right and what was wrong), Christ died for us. By
That’s silly, you say—and you’re right. But I’ve dug this definition, if we’re living like a nun but only
further and asked myself why I’m so silly. Recently doing that because we ourselves think that’s a good
I’ve discovered that I fear what God and others will idea, then we’re sinners.
think of me too. So it’s not just about worrying about As you consider taking a serious look in the mirror,
my own opinions, it’s also fearing judgment and you can be assured of one thing: although you may
condemnation from God and others. I’m left with cringe at what you see, God does not. He knows
one thought that causes me to walk through my your problems, but He focuses on your potential,
trepidation: even a goof like Abraham was dearly because he remembers: …while we were still
loved by God. Maybe there’s hope for me too. powerless, Christ died…

April 8 Thought for today: Jesus …“gives strength to the
weary and increases the power of the weak.” Isaiah
Scripture Reading for today: 1 Chronicles 9 and 10; 40:29 NIV
Romans 5
Thought for tomorrow: If Christ thought you were
You really need to read Romans 5, but if you don’t, worth dying for, don’t you think it’s time to consider
read this from verse 6: You see, at just the right time, what value he saw in you? An inventory helps you
when we were still powerless, Christ died for the consider who you are, why you exist, and where you
ungodly. are headed.
This is a big deal. Long before you “came to
believe” or made the decision to turn your life over April 9
to the care and control of God, Christ died for you.
He didn’t wait until you deserved it, or had made up Scripture Reading for today: 1 Chronicles 11 and 12;
for all that you lack. He didn’t wait until you made a Romans 6
commitment to Him. No, indeed not. First, He made
a commitment to you. (If you want to study the A quick read through Romans 6 may evoke a wide
extent of that commitment, I suggest you read our range of emotions…we should no longer be slaves to
Insight Journal Part III, which focuses on this topic.) sin…wow! That sounds great. Since sin is living
Very rarely will anyone die for a righteous man, independently of God, and because we’ve
though for a good man someone might possibly dare presumably been ready to acknowledge the first
to die. (verse 7) Is that what you think? In order to three steps as true (Why else would we be at step
get the blessings of God, we’d better be good. (This four? If you’ve not done that yet, stop now. Return
is sort of like the “Santa‐goes‐to‐heaven” model of to step one. You’re wasting your time.) ‐ it means
believing.) If that’s what you’ve been taught, you we’ve come to accept the fact that independent
were taught wrong! No, blessings don’t come to us living has not served us well.
because we earn them, deserve them, or avoid …we should no longer be slaves to sin rings like an
losing them by behaving better than most. Blessings answer to prayer. Our plaguing hurts, habits, and
are bestowed upon us by God because of who He hang‐ups can be wiped out? Cool!
is—not because He hopes we’re going to shape up. But suppose you’ve been at this believing thing for
But God demonstrates his own love for us in this? awhile, and some of your hurts, habits, and hang‐ups
While we were still sinners, Christ died for us. (verse haven’t cooperated by fleeing at the mere mention
8) At NorthStar Community, we like to define sin as of your bold believing. Does Romans 6 leave you
living independently of God. We realize that this is a wondering what you’re doing wrong?
little less cumbersome than trying to list all the
75
…in the same way, count yourselves dead to sin but April 10
alive to God. Huh? How do you do that? I
recommend you start with an inventory. I believe Scripture Reading for today: 1 Chronicles 13 and 14;
that you have to count, take stock, pay attention to, Romans 7
and re‐evaluate your life in order to make a wise
decision about what to ask God to kill off and what I particularly appreciate scripture when I read a
to nurture. chapter like Romans 7. Have you ever thought about
So be brave. Start with bitterness. Ask the Holy writing an autobiography? If so, tell the truth. Would
Spirit to reveal to you where bitterness has taken you be tempted to edit your stories? Sure you
root in your heart. (For a bit of a description of would! I’d prefer to write an autobiography that
bitterness and its ugly effects, see Step 4, Day 7 of captures my funny memories, my “victories,” my
this devotional series.) Grab a dictionary and study happy times. If I could rummage around in my bag of
the definition. Ask the Holy Spirit where the tender memories, I might pull out an occasional defeat—if it
wounds are in your heart that have festered into ultimately had a great ending—like the time I made
bitterness. Then just write it down. Don’t filter it, alternate on my drill team but ended up getting to
judge it, debunk it, ignore it. Try hard not to help the team out when one of our captains couldn’t
medicate it with chocolate and peanut butter. Just perform. I’d tell that story. But believe me, there are
write it down. some stories I would not want retold. Especially
while my parents are still alive and well!
Thought for today: If we have been united with him God didn’t do that in scripture. He had his divine
like this in his death, we will certainly also be united and human storytellers spill the beans. In Romans 7,
with him in his resurrection. For we know that our Paul does that when he, a virtual spiritual giant of a
old self was crucified with him so that the body of sin man, says this, “For I have the desire to do what is
might be done away with, that we should no longer good, but I cannot carry it out. For what I do is not
be slaves to sin—because anyone who has died has the good I want to do; no, the evil I do not want to
been freed from sin. Now if we died with Christ, we do—this I keep on doing.” I once had someone tell
believe that we will also live with him. In the same me that this wasn’t really true of Paul, once he
way, count yourselves dead to sin but alive to God in became a believer. This must have been how he was
Christ Jesus. Therefore do not let sin reign in your before step 3. Maybe this person is right. But as best
mortal body so that you obey its evil desires. as I can determine with my limited knowledge, that
Selected passages, Romans 6 is not what the man said. He’s saying that he
struggles with matching his behaving with his
Thought for tomorrow: I realize that right now you believing. He doesn’t say, “Hey, I used to be this
are thinking about how I’m trying to trick you into way. But once I came to believe, I was zapped. Now
doing an inventory. You’re wrong. I’m making no I’m sinless.” He doesn’t say that in the chapter I’m
bones about it; just do it. Why? Because it’s good for reading from. So even spiritual giants take time to
you. Medicating, avoiding, denying, repressing, inventory their lives.
suppressing all our hurts, habits, and hang‐ups Erwin McManus has an entry in his book Soul
equals letting sin reign in our mortal body so that we Cravings called, “Love is Like Stepping On Broken
obey its evil desires. If you continue in this manner, Glass.” Ask the Holy Spirit to recall to your mind your
God won’t stop loving you. Your stubbornness won’t past love experiences gone bad. As you make the
cause Jesus to renounce his crucifixion and list, take note of how these experiences made you
subsequent resurrection experience because he’s feel, and see if the Spirit reveals to you any patterns
irritated by your bad behaving. What it will do is of responding to this pain.
hinder you from experiencing the capacity to be free
that was given to you the very moment you allowed Thought for today: Look deep into my heart, God,
Christ care and control of your life, believing that and find out everything I am thinking. Don’t let me
only He could. follow evil ways, but lead me in the way that time

76
has proven true. Psalm 139:23‐24 New Century in your pursuit of love? As you inventory your love
Edition life, ask the Spirit—is this what love is?

Thought for tomorrow: “How is it that the same April 12
thing that can make your life a rhapsody can leave
you gutted, like a dead fish wrapped in day‐old Scripture Reading for today: 1 Chronicles 17 and 18;
newspaper?”—Depeche Mode, in the song “The Romans 9
Meaning of Love”
This week I ran into an old friend. It had been a
April 11 long time since we had connected, but thanks to the
magic of email and prayer lines, I knew she was in a
Scripture Reading for today: 1 Chronicles 15 and 16; world of hurt. I won’t spill her guts on you, but
Romans 8 things were bad. So I said, “Hey, I’m praying for
you.”
You have just got to love Romans 8. “I consider To which she said, “Well, goodness. Thanks, but
that our present sufferings are not worth comparing we’re all FINE. God is in control, no worries here!”
with the glory that will be revealed in us.” (verse 9) And off she marched with her bloodshot eyes,
Revealed in us? Not to us? Not for us? No. In us. droopy shoulders, and extra wrinkles in her face and
Revealed in us. Glory revealed in us. That’s cool. clothes. Suffering wears on us. It shows, even when
But to make room for God’s grand epic adventure we try to deny it.
and glory, we’ve got to get the junk out of our trunk. I understand my friend’s point. She’s afraid if she
We’ve got to deal with suffering. We can’t medicate acknowledges her suffering, the rest of us fellow
or run from it. Well, that’s not quite true. We can do believers are going to give her a speech about
both those things and more to avoid embracing our bucking up and God’s provision. Perhaps she thinks
suffering. But we won’t have room for all the glory. only spiritual sissies cry in their corn flakes or lose
McManus says in entry 4 in Soul Cravings (under sleep over wayward children and unpaid bills. Since
Intimacy) that “We are created to know God and to my job title includes the word “minister,” I suspect
know love.” But he doesn’t stop there. Love may be she has some preconceived notions about what I
what we’re created for, but it is risky business. “We think strong faith looks like (and if so, I hope she’s
cannot live unaffected by love. We are most alive wrong about me).
when we find it, most devastated when we lose it, I’m still going to pray for my friend. I’m praying she
most empty when we give up on it, most inhumane stumbles across Romans 9. Paul writes in verse two,
when we betray it, and most passionate when we “I have great sorrow and unceasing anguish in my
pursue it.” (Entry 3, Intimacy section, Soul Cravings) heart.” Paul got his letters printed in the Bible. I
Ask the Holy Spirit to help you write out your think he qualifies as a spiritual giant. And when faced
answers to these questions: with the messiness of life—he admitted it—“I have
• When have I been most devastated by lost love? great sorrow and unceasing anguish in my heart.”
• When have I felt empty as I have given up on love? Maybe you believe that spiritual giants have short
• When have I been inhumane as I betrayed the lists and anemic emotions on their step four
ones I love? inventories. I hope you rethink that. It’s okay for
• When have I failed to pursue love passionately “real” men and women of faith (those who’ve
because I preferred to protect myself? marched through the first three steps) to tell the
truth.
Thought for today: Let me express my anguish. Let So what about you? What’s on your list that
me be free to speak out of the bitterness of my soul. includes great sorrow and unceasing anguish in your
Job 7:11 NIV heart?

Thought for tomorrow: Messy loves sometimes
leaves us broken, sometimes bitter. Where are you
77
Thought for today: The troubles of my heart are They have no doubt that being the center of
enlarged; bring me out of my distresses.” Psalm attention is their due. Of course, if one gets too
25:17 (NASB) carried away with the center‐of‐attention notion,
that can be a problem. But I think a larger problem is
Thought for tomorrow: There’s a verse tucked away when we begin to believe that it is never okay to tell
somewhere in the scriptures that tells us that we the truth about how we’re feeling or when we come
can’t heal what we don’t acknowledge. Wait— to believe that we don’t deserve the opportunity to
maybe that’s Dr. Phil. Maybe he got it from the be heard by an attentive and compassionate ear.
scriptures! Either way, it’s true. If you want to get to So what about you? Do you know when you’re too
the good stuff—the big dreams, the peace that tired, too hungry, or too stressed? Do you know
passes all understanding, the fruits of the spirit—you what you need when that happens, and do you take
must be willing to tell the truth about where you’re appropriate action? Part of an effective step four
currently camped. involves learning to see ourselves more clearly. Start
looking!
April 13
Thought for today: Jesus said, “I tell you the truth,
Scripture Reading for today: 1 Chronicles 19; unless you change and become like little children,
Romans 10 – 11 you will never enter the kingdom of heaven.”
Matthew 18:3 NIV
I am reminded repeatedly why children often lead “Therefore, whoever humbles himself like a child is
us. Here are some encounters I’ve had with kids the greatest in the kingdom of heaven.” Matthew
lately. 18:4 NIV
• Last week a kid pitched a total fit in front of me
in the grocery checkout line. It was nap time and Thought for tomorrow: Take a few minutes to list
this kid knew it; well, he knew he was miserable. times when you have an inaccurate sense of self.
Perhaps he didn’t know quite yet that a nap was Feeling inadequate, “less than,” “better than,” etc.
what would restore him. But he knew he needed are all indicators that we’re not seeing ourselves
something. His crying and stomping and sniffling through God‐vision goggles. Code words: isolating
and head banging were all very effective from others, being either too aggressive or non‐
attempts to get his mother to set aside her assertive, fearing failure, appearing inadequate,
agenda and take him home. denying any wrongdoing, or having a negative or
• A recent visit with my nieces and nephews found inflated self‐image.
me in my happy place—surrounded by three I don’t see myself as God does when ____ because
loving kids who just knew beyond a shadow of a ____. This affects ____. This activates ____. This
doubt that their aunt wanted to hear every makes me feel ____.
single detail of their lives. I heard about mucking
out a horse stall, a detailed account of a week‐ April 14
long field trip, the latest school gossip, and my
third‐grade nephew’s decision to alter “career Scripture Reading for today: 1 Chronicles 20 and 21;
paths” (yes, he said that). Romans 12
• A four‐year‐old walked up to me at the
beginning of our celebration time in church and One of my favorite verses is found in this chapter
told me how really mad he was that his daddy of Romans. It used to be my most hated verse. Every
called him stupid. He may have only been four, time I ran across it in my reading, I eyed it with a
but even he knew that was totally uncool—and beady eye of suspicion. How in the world does one
wrong. offer their body as a living sacrifice? And is that even
appropriate?
Kids get it. They get that they are special and worthy Having offered my thoughts, feelings, and choices
of an attentive ear and a compassionate response. to the altar of people pleasing on many occasions—
78
inappropriately—I asked myself, is this an folly. Sometimes they’re going to be right in their
egomaniacal God I am being called to serve? Does disappointments, sometimes wrong. I think I’m
God need me to “worship and serve” Him so that he better off entrusting myself into the hands of Him
can feel worthy? If so, how does that make him any who judges justly than counting on other people.
different from a mere mortal, some of whom require
loyalty and unwavering allegiance in order to feel in April 15
control? Is God a control freak?
But even when I was reading scripture through the Scripture Reading for today: 1 Chronicles 22 and 23;
lens of co‐dependency run amok, I was intrigued as I Romans 13
read on…Be transformed by the renewing of your
mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what “You are not the boss of me.” Each of my children
God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will…” I has expressed this sentiment at one time or another.
can know the will of God? Wow! I want that! Each time, Pete and I responded in unison.
I’m not sure I ever returned to my questions in “As a matter of fact, we are the boss of you.”
paragraph two. Because in all this questioning a Perhaps you know that I like being the boss. But if
thought occurred to me: If I can know the will of you know that fact, you also realize that Pete is a
God, then I assume God will provide a way for me to happy third‐born and is just as content when he is
do the will of God. Doing the will of God has got to not the boss as when he wears the mantle of
be a better proposition than trying to keep all the responsibility of man in charge. So our unified
people I know happy all the time. I decided to response is not all about wanting to be bossy. It’s
rethink my people‐pleasing ways. more about understanding Romans 13.
Right off the bat Paul issues a firm statement:
Thought for today: If you’re tired of disappointing submit to authority. He doesn’t qualify this with
people, and you want to find a more peaceful way to sayings like, “If you like your authority” or “If you
live, try this: List the ways you seek the approval of think your authority is worthy of your allegiance.” He
others. Our constant seeking of the approval of says simply, “Submit.”
others keeps us in a constant state of impression The McBean children aren’t the only people who
management. Code words: caring more about what don’t like people being the boss of them. Most of us
others think about me than what is true of me, dream of being our own bosses and getting our own
feeling unworthy, fearing criticism, lacking big scoop of authority. And maybe someday we’ll get
confidence, fearing failure, ignoring our own needs. some of that authority. But for today, let’s wrestle
Example: I seek approval when ____ because with our own limitations. So how are we doing at
____. This affects ____. This activates ____. submitting to our earthly authorities?
Here’s one way I might answer that: I seek
approval when I care more about what a person Thought for Today: Honor your father and mother.
thinks about me than I care about doing the next Then you will live a long, full life n the land the Lord
right thing. I seek approval of others because your God is giving you. Exodus 20:12 NLT
sometimes, immediate gratification of another’s
approval feels good. This affects me in a million ways Thought for tomorrow: List all the people in roles of
because people can be pretty demanding, and I can’t authority that you resent and/or fear. Code words:
make everyone happy all the time; it is too comparing self to others, taking things too
exhausting! This activates feelings of guilt and personally, fearing rejection, noting an arrogant
shame, and I feel like I’m losing pieces of myself in attitude, feeling inadequate, reacting rather than
my efforts to make all people happy all the time. acting.
I fear ____ because ____. This affects ____. This
Thought for tomorrow: … Do not think of yourself activates ____. This makes me feel ____. I wonder if
more highly than you ought. Romans 12:3 NIV. It is you are one of those people created to lead others.
arrogant to think that I can do for others what only If so, I suspect you will make a much more effective
God can do. Seeking approval from other humans is authority if you know how to live well with your own
79
authority figures. Maybe you never aspire to rule. According to Juanita Ryan, (you can hear her take
Whether you want to lead or to follow, it is always on this; her audio class is on our web site),
appropriate to learn how to live well with authority. sometimes we become judgmental of ourselves and
others when we’re suffering. Sometimes working up
April 16 a good head of steam seems easier to deal with than
our own howling pain. Thanks to Dr. Ryan’s wise
Scripture Reading for today: 1 Chronicles 24 and 25; words, I paused to prepare. I dug deep and found my
Romans 14 compassionate self. I’ve decided to spend the rest of
this week practicing the fine art of compassion—I’m
Monday, April 16, 2007. Another day that will be going to let go of my judgments of others—since I’m
seared into the memories of every student at the only person I have the power to change.
Virginia Tech, their parents, the faculty, visitors,
alumni—and the world. As I write this, more than 24 Thought for today: So then, each of us will give an
hours have passed since the “massacre at Virginia account of himself to God. Romans 14:12 NIV
Tech,” and we still are uncertain of the body count.
Inexplicably to most of us, a young man kills two Thought for tomorrow: List your resentments. Code
people in a dorm and then more than 30 in words for resentment may include: feeling injured,
classrooms on the Virginia Tech campus. violated, left out, low sense of worth, angry, bitter,
It’s so horrible, so baffling; most of us are still in or desirous of retaliation.
shock. But not the news media. Many of them are Example: I resent ____ because ______. This
clear on their response to this tragedy: judge. affects _____. This activates _____. This makes me
Desperate to get word on my son’s safety and the feel _______.
safety of his fellow Hokies, I watched the television
coverage of this unfolding nightmare with rapt April 17
attention. What did I hear? A lot of armchair
quarterbacking, criticism, and judging all authority Scripture Reading for today: 1 Chronicles 26;
figures currently working on the Tech campus. Romans 15 and 16.
Eventually I simply couldn’t take any more and had
to hope that emails and cell phones would give me One of the beautiful blessings tucked into the
what I wanted—the sound of my son’s voice or word fabric of step four is hope. A thorough step four
of his status. Hearing my child’s voice was a relief, requires us to lean into our pain. Listing my
but it could not ameliorate the rage I felt at the resentments, disappointments, fears, sexual
reporters’ interviews of other people’s children. misbehaviors, etc. requires me to uncover my eyes
They badgered them with questions like, “Do you and stare myself in the face. Step four wipes away
think you should have been told earlier about the my illusions and good intentions, my dreams and “if
first shooting? Aren’t you upset that classes weren’t onlys.” An accurate inventory tells me what is—not
cancelled? Why wasn’t your campus closed off?” what I wish. This kind of brutal honesty is
And then I went to scripture. You, then, why do frightening, but if I can do this I will be developing
you judge your brother? Or why do you look down on spiritual muscles that will help prepare me for God’s
your brother? (Romans 14:10) grand epic adventure.
Ouch. Reporters judged officials; I judged And that gives me hope. If I can embrace my
reporters. I was mad as only a scared mother can be, current suffering and make friends with the truth
and those lame questioners made a nice, safe, about me, then I am one step closer to my true God‐
anonymous target for my rage. I still believe that no created identity. I realize after reading the book of
one was served by this rush to judgment that we Romans that God is calling each of us to live larger
witnessed on all the networks covering this story. than any human is capable of doing. If I want what
But that gave me absolutely no right to join in the God wants for me, I’d better be willing to get myself
fray. ready to receive my call. So the bottom line is: as we
grow up, we need to grow strong. God has big plans
80
for us, and we’re in need of character (which is far that simple solutions rarely capture the complexity
different from acting like a character!). and mystery of the will of God.
Here’s the deal. It’s freaky. In Job 1, Satan and God
Thought for today: May the God of hope fill you are reported to have had a conversation. Let’s take a
with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you look:
may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Satan – “I have been patrolling the earth,
Spirit. Romans 15:13 NIV watching everything that’s going on.”
God – “Have you noticed my servant Job? He is the
Thought for tomorrow: Take time today and list finest man in all the earth. He is blameless – a man
your strengths. God has given each of us gifts. What of complete integrity. He fears God and stays away
are yours? from evil.”
Satan – “Yes, but Job has a good reason to fear
April 18 God. You have always put a wall of protection
around him and his home and his property….reach
Scripture Reading for today: 1 Chronicles 27 and 28; out and take away everything he has, and he will
Job 1 surely curse you to your face!”
What a storyline! Think about what just happened.
September is a month that will always be defined God painted a virtual target on the heart of Job, and
by 9/11. April has become a month that pointed him out to Satan. Lest we forget, remember
commemorates the tragedy at Virginia Tech. We that Satan has only one purpose: “The thief’s
have other days in U.S. history that recall our purpose is to steal and kill and destroy.” John 10:10
collective national tragedies as well as celebrations. As we read through this book, this small exchange
December brings Christmas; November, is going to haunt us.
Thanksgiving. The fourth of July is always a fun long
weekend. Thought for today: The thief’s purpose is to steal
It’s fitting that during this particular month, those and kill and destroy. My purpose is to give them a
of us participating in the NorthStar Community rich and satisfying life.” John 10:10 NLT
(whether in person or via the Web) are working on a
fourth step—a step that will include a remembering Thought for tomorrow: Do you feel like someone
of both tragedy and triumph. put a target on your heart and begged Satan to take
The book of Job is the story of a family that aim? If so, the book of Job is a must read.
suffered for no good reason. Although Job’s
“friends” try their best to explain the horrid events April 19
that unfold in this drama by finding fault with Job
and/or his family, God makes it clear in the first Scripture Reading for today: 1 Chronicles 28, Psalm
chapter that those “friends” are way off base. As the 122, Job 2
stories of slaughter from Virginia Tech assail us—if
the media is any kind of barometer—we want Have you ever had a day when you asked, “Can it
answers. We want to know why one young, get any worse than this?”
disturbed man massacred over 30 students and Job did. One day the news got worse and worse.
faculty members. We want someone to blame. He’s First, a messenger arrived at Job’s house (where
a likely target, but is he enough? Can we blame more they were feasting) and reported the death and loss
people? Can we come up with some policies and of all his animals and farmhands. That’s economic
procedures that will give us the illusion of safety in a loss.
world where suffering strikes in alarmingly random Next, another messenger reports a freak fire that
ways? destroys all his sheep and shepherds. More
Job provides no easy answers, and that’s good economic loss.
news. In spite of our desire to distill life into easily
memorized formulas and platitudes, Job reminds us
81
Then, a raid is reported that cost him his camels Suffered lately? Then you can relate to the words
and servants. This is the virtual collapse of Job’s of Job. Let’s review what we know:
financial empire. Job lost everything. Was it a result of his sin? No.
Finally, the last and most horrendous loss: a Because he was “the finest man in all the earth. He is
sudden wind sweeps in from the wilderness, blameless – a man of complete integrity. He fears
collapsing his house and killing all Job’s children. God and stays away from evil. And he has
And his initial response, In all this, Job did not sin maintained his integrity, even though you urged me
by blaming God. Job 1:22 to harm him without cause.” (Job 2:3)
In chapter 2, we realize that more bad news Job three contains Job’s first speech in response to
follows swiftly on the heels of day one. Satan steals all this pain. In it, he curses the day he was born. Like
Job’s health. No one said a word to Job, for they saw most of us, when faced with great suffering, we soon
that his suffering was too great for words. Job 2:13 lose perspective. Job has forgotten the years of
plenty, the parties, the blessings. His greatest fear
Thought for today: I remember my affliction and my has been realized.
wandering, the bitterness and the gall. I well I remember one week when the greatest fear I had
remember them, and my soul is downcast within me. was my daughter’s propensity to drive long
Yet this I call to mind and therefore I have hope: distances—alone—at night—down busy highways
Because of the Lord’s great love we are not and by‐ways. It never occurred to me that I should
consumed, for his compassions never fail. be worrying about my son sitting in a classroom at
Lamentations 3:19‐22 Norris Hall on the Virginia Tech campus (The year –
2007). Who knew?
Thought for tomorrow: I wonder how lonely Job One week I was humming when the days were
felt. All is lost. His friends come to sit with him, but warm and sunny; the next night my son and I had a
Job’s suffering is so overwhelming that no one can good cry (having left the Virginia Tech campus on the
find a word of comfort. People who suffer tell me heels of a massacre).
that sometimes having a friend just to sit with them One week I was looking forward to a lot of quality
is the best comfort of all in times of great sorrow. time this summer with our three children; the next
But we’ll soon discover that these friends can’t hold week my mind was filled with sorrow for the families
their tongues for long. Although silence may be the who have had their family members snatched from
only response necessary in the face of great pain, them in one morning of rage. I don’t know what to
simply embracing our suffering is sometimes too choose to worry about, and I am beginning to think
hard. We feel compelled to fill it with words. I worry is a waste of time for someone like me (who
wonder if Job had the urge to run and hide. Have doesn’t even know how to worry accurately).
you felt like hiding from others? List the times you I have to consciously remember that there are still
have isolated yourself. Isolation is a way of hiding things worth humming over. I must intentionally
and/or self‐protection. It’s a way of avoiding pain turn my mind to thoughts of vacation and quality
and not taking risks. Code words: fear rejection, time; all these things are easy to forget when your
timid and shy, feel defeated, procrastinate, see eyes tend to leak involuntarily.
ourselves as unique, lonely, or blame others for our In the week following the Virginia Tech tragedy,
relationship deficits. my son and I stopped at a local coffee shop for a
I isolate ______ because ____. This affects ____. snack; next to the register stood a pile of
This activates ____. This makes me feel ____. newspapers. The headline story included the face of
the perpetrator. With calm and quiet resolution my
April 20 son stood at that stand and systematically turned
every paper over—facedown. Employees and
Scripture Reading for today: 2 Chronicles 1 and 2; passers‐by could not see my son’s rage. No sorrow
Job 3 was obvious on his countenance. He just flipped
those papers over.
82
My friend behind the counter took my money and inappropriate to a situation, or withhold
glanced at my boy with sympathy ‐ sometimes conversation.
suffering shows up in weird ways and inconvenient I repress my feelings ____ because ____. This
times. affects ____. This activates ____. This makes me feel
This is the important point of this story: WHEN ____.
SUFFERING SHOWS UP, DON’T SEND HIM AWAY.
Embrace him. Acknowledge him. Lean into him. April 21
There are worse things than suffering. When we
push him back, ignore him, and deny him access into Scripture Reading for today: 2 Chronicles 3 and 4;
our heart and mind, he’s a sneaky thief. He’ll still Job 4
find a way back in. He’ll creep in and set up a tent.
He’ll torment you in unexpected ways. With friends like Eliphaz, who needs enemies?
There are no simple answers for suffering. I know
Thought for today: I’ll never forget the trouble, the we all love a simple answer and an explanation for
utter lostness, the taste of ashes, the poison I’ve suffering, but we don’t often get that. Can we let
swallowed. I remember it all—oh, how well I that go? Can we be careful not jump to conclusions
remember—the feeling of hitting the bottom. But simply because we feel angry, scared, frustrated,
there’s one other thing I remember, and and depressed?
remembering, I keep a grip on hope: God’s loyal love Another thought. When we are deeply wounded
couldn’t have run out, his merciful love couldn’t have and in lots of pain, sometimes it feels safer to run to
dried up. They’re created new every morning. How anger. A spirit of criticism and judgment brings with
great your faithfulness! I’m sticking with God (I say it it the illusion of power. But it’s just an illusion. I
over and over). He’s all I’ve got left. God proves to be would recommend that we acknowledge our anger,
good to the man who passionately waits, to the but recognize it for what it is; sometimes it’s a thinly
woman who diligently seeks. It’s a good thing to veiled screen that we try to hide our suffering
quietly hope, quietly hope for help from God. It’s a behind.
good thing when you’re young to stick it out through Our emotions are not sins. Emotions are emails to
the hard times. When life is heavy and hard to take, the soul intended to: get our attention and teach us
go off by yourself. Enter the silence. Bow in prayer. profound lessons. Unfortunately, we sometimes
Don’t ask questions: Wait for hope to appear. Don’t misuse the feeling of anger.
run from trouble. Take it full‐face. The “worst” is
never the worst. Why? Because the master won’t Thought for today: So stop telling lies. Let us tell our
ever walk out and fail to return. If he works severely, neighbors the truth…(Translation: It’s a lie to express
he also works tenderly. His stockpiles of loyal love anger when we truly are feeling afraid.) for we are
are immense. He takes no pleasure in making life all parts of the same body. (Translation: We must
hard, in throwing roadblocks in the way. learn how to treat each other gently—with respect—
Lamentations 3:19‐33 The Message including ourselves.) And don’t sin by letting anger
control you. Don’t let the sun go down while you are
Thought for tomorrow: List the areas of your life still angry, for anger gives a foothold to the devil.
that you have trouble expressing or even Ephesians 4:25‐27 NLT
experiencing feelings. Many of us learn to hide our
feelings. In unhealthy families, there are usually only Thought for tomorrow: Make a list of ways you
a very small range of emotions that are allowed. Our inappropriately handle anger. Anger is a normal,
true nature is distorted and reality is hidden. This healthy emotion. But sometimes we don’t know how
lack of emotional honesty can make us physically ill. to allow it to do its job (show us there is an issue
Code words: unaware of feelings, struggle with that needs addressing) and then let it leave. Most of
relationships, depressed, chronically ill, realize that us either deny it or use it as a weapon of mass
one’s feelings are sometimes distorted or destruction. Either way, this is not cool. It’s okay to
acknowledge one’s anger; it is not okay to be
83
dishonest about it, or to give ourselves permission to warns us that there are times when to rebuke a
disrespect others by inappropriate expression of it. scoffer—even with the truth or when it would be
Code words: resentment, depression, anxiety, self‐ helpful for them to hear it—could be dangerous.
pity, jealousy, or stress. Both Old and New Testament writers warn us not to
Example: I inappropriately deal with anger when I rebuke a scoffer. Sometimes stating the truth is a
____ because ____. This affects ____. This activates rebuke, and we shouldn’t speak it.
my _____. This makes me feel ____. That said, Job just lets it all hang out. He must have
felt very safe with God to speak so frankly. Although
April 22 his friends clearly act like goofs, their friendship
must have a history of safety and love. Job obviously
Scripture Reading for today: 2 Chronicles 5; Job 6 has not a history of hiding his thoughts and feelings.
and 7 Job is a great model.

One of the great things about Job is his honesty. Thought for today: Despite the pain, I have not
New Testament writers remind us that much that is denied the words of the Holy One. Job 6:10
written in scripture is placed there to encourage us,
guide us, exhort us, etc. I think Job is a great guy to Thought for tomorrow: Have you been a person
go to for advice when it comes to suffering. who can be honest in a safe way? Are you a person
As Job speaks, I’m reminded of one of the people can be honest around, without fear of
prerequisites for an honest conversation. I’m careful speaking to a scoffer? Do you have a history of
about throwing honesty around in a willy nilly honesty abuse? One last thought: it is helpful to
fashion. The older I get, the more cautious I am with remember that although our brains may be fuzzy in
the gift of honesty. the truth department, God is a great source for a
I used to think that, since the truth will set you truth checkup. If our truths deny the words of God,
free, stating the truth is always a good thing. And it we might need to rethink what we believe.
is—to a point. But I’ve also learned to moderate my
expressions. Why? Because sometimes what I April 23
believe is truth is really better described as what
feels like truth to me at that moment. Sometimes, I Scripture Reading for today: 2 Chronicles 6 and 7;
may believe something is true with all my heart, Job 8
even though I’m completely wrong‐headed.
Emotions cloud perspective. Trauma does strange “You’re getting what you deserve.” This
things to our brain. summarizes Bildad’s perspective on Job’s suffering.
Years ago we were in a car accident and I just “God will not reject a person of integrity, nor will
knew that my images of the accident were THE he lend a hand to the wicked.”
FACTS. Taking an air bag to the face and the All true. But lest we forget, Job is in this pickle
subsequent concussion scrambled my brain. because he was a person about whom God said, “He
According to my family, my memories were WRONG. is the finest man in all the earth. He is blameless—a
How can that be? To this day, when I remember the man of complete integrity.” Take that, Bildad.
accident, I see a vision that feels real to me. But even I wonder if sometimes we avoid a fourth step
I have to admit that the other four passengers saw because, like Bildad, we are certain that anything we
the same thing, and it is very different from my unearth will reveal “all that we lack” (to quote Sarah
“truth.” So now I tread cautiously around the edges McLachlan). This is wrong. Although we like to tie up
of my perspective on truth. Secondly, just because suffering in neat bundles of clarity, it doesn’t work
something is true, it doesn’t mean it is appropriate that way. God’s ways are beyond our ability to
to share it. I’m trying to develop my spiritual muscles comprehend. There is a God, and we did not get the
by learning better how to respect truth. Sometimes job. There is more going on in the unseen world than
silence is the best policy. Sometimes it’s a tacit we know.
endorsement of a lie to remain quiet. Scripture
84
God has plans for us—to prosper us, to give us a knowledge of who God is and how God operates. In
hope and a future. How that looks is God’s design, my Life Recovery Bible, the commentator makes a
and it is not necessarily in accordance with our great point in chapter nine. “Job knew more than he
desires. Know this: we can have a life of understood. He knew about God’s sovereignty and
contentment, prosperity, hope and future—by justice and that no man is blameless when seen in
God’s definition. If we have effectively claimed a the light of God’s perfection. What he didn’t
third step (turning our life and will over to the care understand is that God is merciful and that it is only
and control of God), we have already made the by grace that we do not receive our deserved fates,
decision to do life God’s way. which would be far worse than Job’s sufferings.
So get busy. Do that fourth‐step inventory. When we feel that God isn’t being fair, we should
remember that if he were, we would never be able to
Thought for today: If any of you lacks wisdom, he enter his presence. When God is ‘unfair,’ it is always
should ask God, who gives generously to all without on the side of mercy.”
finding fault, and it will be given to him. James 1:5 Aren’t we all like that? We tend to know more
NIV than we understand. For example, a woman may
know that adultery is seriously not cool, but I
Thought for tomorrow: Sometimes suffering is the wonder if she understands the impact if she follows
pathway to peace. Avoiding suffering can lead us off through and commits adultery. Does she understand
the pathway and get us stuck in a ditch. Bildad that her children may never be able to work through
implies that Job’s problem has to be bad behaving. the betrayals and heartaches that will inevitably
But there’s another issue that Bildad hasn’t even arise when the affair is discovered? In 10 or 15 years,
given a voice to: sometimes what we think of as will she understand why her son is unable to commit
doing good is really not. For example, sometimes we in a relationship? Does she understand that her
prefer taking care of others more than accepting adultery makes it harder for her spouse to take
responsibility for ourselves. Frankly, it’s easier to get ownership of his own shortcomings in the marriage?
distracted by other people’s needs than it is to step Does she understand that her daughter may be
up to the plate and take ownership of our own suspicious and distrustful around even the nicest guy
issues. Code words: going co‐dependent, no core in the world? No. She may not. Nor will she grasp the
identity, desire to feel useful and indispensable, doubling of this tragedy if her affair is with another
feeling responsible ‘for’ (rather than ‘to’), or married man. It might be too painful to both know
rescuing. Ask God to show you examples of “godly” and understand the will of God as it applies to her
caretaking that is really not godly at all. choices. And that is also true for us. I want to
I take care of ____ because ____. This affects encourage you to take seriously the implications of
____. This activates ____. This makes me feel ____. your choices. I hope you will acknowledge to
yourself and to God that your knowledge and your
April 24 understanding may be worlds apart. Speaking what
we know without understanding what we’re missing
Scripture Reading for today: 2 Chronicles 8; Job 9 produces about the same results as if we didn’t have
and 10 any knowledge at all!

I love Job. I love how truthful he is. I love the Thought for today: Trust in the Lord with all your
messiness of his honesty. I love how he doesn’t feel heart; do not depend on your own understanding.
it necessary to butter up God. He’s able to express Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which
how he feels—about himself, his circumstances, his path to take. Proverbs 3:5‐6 NLT
theology—the entire enchilada. Job has some things
going for him that you and I may lack. Job has a Thought for tomorrow: One compelling reason that I
history of relationship with God. Chapters one and continue to make fearless moral inventories is
two are proof of the intimacy between Job and God. because I have a healthy respect for my own
And there’s a lot to commend Job for in terms of his capacity to be deceived. Denial is a powerful enemy.
85
My hope is in the revelation of the truth to me by I understand that the “shamer” has noble goals. Like
the Holy Spirit. I hope that I can allow God to Zophar and Bildad, these folks sincerely believe that
transform me now, so that I won’t continue to harm they are trying to inspire, encourage, and motivate
myself and others, and that I can change in order to positive change. Whether it is a parent, a spouse, a
avoid causing any future harm that I could prevent. I sibling, or a dear friend, these masters of shame see
hope this for you, too. themselves as helpers—not hinderers—in the
restoration process. This is another mystery to me:
April 25 what evidence does anyone have that shaming has
ever worked? I grant you, it sometimes bows the
Scripture Reading for today: 2 Chronicles 9; Job 11 shoulders and head; it occasionally results in short‐
and 12 term compliance. But has it ever in the history of
mankind made the “shamee” a better person? I
“Shouldn’t someone make you feel ashamed?” think not.

The day began like any other, and unfortunately, And here’s another thought. Zophar, in his
ended like many others. Another day when I sit and misguided attempts to shame Job into better
watch one person take on the job of shaming believing and behaving, gets it wrong. God was
another. This, I think to myself, is why I sometimes rewarding Job in His own mysterious ways. Zophar is
despair. I have no idea why we seem to think that certain that this is all about punishment. Think about
“making others feel ashamed” is of value. It seems to that; Zophar could not even shame Job with any
me that shaming is packaged like a value meal. degree of accuracy.
Shaming is usually accompanied with a side dish of
self‐righteous indignation and a large helping of Two points not to forget: 1. Shaming doesn’t work,
anger. and 2. Shamers generally make themselves look
foolish. In fact, Zophar revealed more about himself
During this particular meeting it is parental shame than Job as he ranted on. Zophar was arrogant and ill
that makes my heart weep. “I expected more of you equipped to deal with Job’s suffering in a way that
than this.” “You can do far better than this.” “Well, I pleased God. Soon we will read about God’s utter
know you want to change, but I am just not so sure displeasure with Job’s so‐called friends and his
whether you can. Son, you’ve proven to be a huge indictment of these friends. So I will leave you with
disappointment to me.” “I just don’t understand this thought. If you know and love someone who is
how you can be so stupid!” On and on it goes. Who in desperate need of a thorough fourth‐step
knows where it will stop? It certainly doesn’t end in experience, please get out of their way and do not
a child saying, “Gee, Dad! How right you are! I can do hinder their progress. There is no value in your
better than this! I’m ready to go to any lengths to attempts to shame, blame, and manipulate them
become my best self!” It’s far more likely that this into compliance. Finally, if you are the one in need of
kid will comply and lay low—going through the a fourth step, and you’ve allowed others’
motions of good behaving—and run out and self‐ mishandling of your suffering to make you stubborn
medicate at the first distracted moment on the part and recalcitrant, please rethink your position. God
of his hyper‐vigilant parents. I know the heartbreak judges each of us according to our deeds. He’s
of disappointed spouses, parents, siblings, and perfectly capable of handling your foolish friends.
friends. This time, they had so hoped it would be Since you are going to give an account of your
different. They hoped their optimism would not be actions too, why not go ahead and take the next
misplaced. Relapse stinks. Living with disappointed right step?
expectations stinks too. I get that. What continues to
baffle me is why caring people think that heaping Thought for today: After the Lord finished speaking
shame on another is an effective intervention tool. to Job, he said to Eliphaz: “I am angry with you and
your two friends, for you have not spoken accurately
about me, as my servant Job has.” Job 42:7 NLT
86
house and hash it all out over a cup of cappuccino.
Thought for tomorrow: It is possible to handle Lawyers, court clerks, and all sorts of paperwork is
misdeeds, pain, and suffering without shaming. required for you to get your day in court.
Consequences can be delivered and boundaries can Not so with God. Today you can have a
be drawn without belittling one another. We can conversation with Him. I pray that you will.
learn how to treat each other with respect. Job’s
goofy friends provide me with lots of motivation. Thought for today: So let us come boldly to the
They remind me that it is possible to contribute to throne of our gracious God. There we will receive his
another’s problems instead of helping to alleviate mercy, and we will find grace to help us when we
them. I’ve got lots more to learn in this area; how need it most. Hebrews 4:16 NLT
about you?
Thought for tomorrow: I know other people are
April 26 poor imitators of the God of mercy and grace. I also
know that we are called to pursue our God‐created
Scripture Reading for today: 2 Chronicles 10; Job 13 identities which include the ability to have the mind
and 14 of Christ, imitate Him, and even know and do His
good, pleasing, and perfect will. That’s a lot of
Fortunately for Job, he understood baloney when potential, and sometimes we all fall short. While
it was served up to him on a silver platter. He had we’re all growing up in our salvation, let’s be gentle
the good sense to realize that his friends were full of with each other. Let’s look for our potential with at
hot air. That’s awesome, but unusual. Most people least as much energy as we pour into picking at each
tell me that they find the advice they receive other’s wounds.
confusing and contradictory. Sincere in their desire
to do the next right thing, defining that next step is April 27
often far more challenging than one might expect.
That’s why I love the fourth step. It’s an Scripture Reading for today: Job 15, 16, and 17
opportunity for us to get alone with God and to
allow His Spirit to blow through our hearts. Later on “If you will listen, I will show you. I will answer you
we’ll begin to share all that we’re writing and from my own experience. And it is confirmed by the
thinking and feeling with another person. This is not reports of wise men who have heard the same thing
the time to be asking others to instruct us about from their fathers.” (Job 15:17‐18 NLT) Eliphaz uses
what we need to inventory. personal experience and wise men’s agreement to
I know we long for input from others, especially support his advice to Job.
when working on something as challenging as a Personal experience is an exceedingly important
fourth step. I’d suggest you ask them about their tool. I love listening to the life stories of others; I
personal experiences with their own stepping. have learned some of my greatest lessons
Perhaps if you’re stuck on the “how tos,” your vicariously. But there are limits. Eliphaz had both
advisors can share what’s worked for them. experience and wise mentors, but his advice still
But for today, I want to encourage you to follow stunk.
Job’s example. He eagerly went straight to the top I had an interesting conversation with a fellow
dog. He had a conversation with God himself. You traveler on an extended flight to California. We were
have this same access. Isn’t that awesome? Maybe about the same age, and we discovered a lot of
the only foolish thing you could do at this point is to common ground. Our children share similar interests
ignore the privilege and deny yourself the and are close in age too. We discovered that we
opportunity of approaching the throne of grace hang out at some of the same sports events. Both of
yourself—without needing any mediators. Isn’t that us are in the middle of a tough semester of AP
awesome? history and math. I asked about her life experience,
Think of it like this. If you find yourself in legal and she shared it generously. My new traveling
difficulties, you can’t just pop over to the judge’s buddy and I had some things in common, but we
87
also had some glaring differences. As the So in many ways, she is a lot wiser than me. I
conversation progressed, I realized that her world appreciated her guiding me to a new perspective. As
and mine were very different. bad a counselor as Eliphaz was, God can take even
Her life is one of financial privilege. Her biggest his stinking thinking and use it to teach us. If you’re
complaint about her youngest child’s school and not sure if the advice you’re giving or receiving is
sport schedule had to do with an obstinate tutor and good or bad, right or wrong, utilize scripture as a
tardy chauffeur. We have an obstinate tutor at our plumb line, testing to see if the wisdom of men is
house too, called Dad; I often serve as a tardy consistent with the wisdom of God.
chauffer. My life is one of privilege too. It’s just a
different kind of privilege. It would have been easy April 28
for me to conclude that our differences were too big
to make our life experiences worth sharing. Once Scripture Reading for today: Job 18, 19, 20, and
we were flying above Vegas and hurtling toward Los 21—feel free to skim!
Angeles, I realized that her experience was going to
require some serious interpretation if I was going to Job and his friends were obviously confused and
benefit from the pearls of wisdom embedded in her sometimes condemning when it came to trying to
life’s experience. I was going to need to see past our make sense of Job’s suffering. Can’t we all relate to
material distances and listen attentively to find our that? But again, Job leads us well. Even in the midst
common ground. of all this turmoil, Job is able to come back to some
very basic and life‐giving beliefs. Job totally gets who
Thought for today: All Scripture is inspired by God is in control.
and is useful to teach us what is true and to make us People with a history of hurts, habits, and hang‐
realize what is wrong in our lives. It corrects us when ups rarely relinquish care and control of their lives
we are wrong and teaches us to do what is right. without a lot of kicking and screaming. Even as I
God uses it to prepare and equip his people to do write this, I realize that what I’m saying isn’t quite
every good work. 2 Timothy 3:16‐17 NLT true. The truth is, we do relinquish control. We give
ourselves over to abusers, we give ourselves over to
Thought for tomorrow: I see two problems with temporary solutions, we give ourselves over to our
giving and receiving advice. 1. Sometimes the advice own minds. Maybe it’s not as simple as saying we
is bad. 2. Sometimes the advice is good, but it comes have control issues. Could it be that what we really
wrapped in a package that turns us off and distracts struggle with is idolatry? We want to determine who
us from the truth of the message. Discounting advice or what we worship. And we like our small gods.
that is either bad or uncomfortably delivered can They don’t ask much of us.
cost us a teachable moment.
Here’s one recommendation that might help prevent Thought for today: Many are the plans in a man’s
wasted‐truth encounters. When offered advice, heart, but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails.
always look for the opportunity to learn. Even bad Proverbs 19:21 NIV
advice can get us thinking. We can process through
our response to it, and think long and hard about Thought for tomorrow: How easy it is to say, “I have
why we think it’s bad. My flying buddy decided that control issues.” It’s a nice, neat, flip response. Say
more hired help was the standard response to her that, and people nod their heads in understanding.
stress. This was neither practical nor right for me. So let’s pause in our nodding and think about this.
But I prayed and processed and realized in a Control issues? Really? That may be true. But could it
moment of clarity that our fears have less to do with also be that we are out of control, and trying to
our schedules and a lot more to do with our beliefs regain control by exhibiting controlling behaviors? So
about our schedules. My new friend also enlightened stop saying you have control issues as if that’s a
me as to my own wrong thinking. She was under no virtue or a good excuse. List all the ways you attempt
illusions. A life of financial privilege did not come to control. Code words: rigidity and lack of
with a get‐out‐of‐discomfort‐free card. She got that. spontaneity, manipulating others to gain approval,
88
overreact to change, lack trust, judgmental attitude, April 30
intolerant, or fear failure.
I attempt to control ____ because ____. This Scripture Reading for today: Job 27, 28, and 29—
affects ____. This activates ____. This makes me feel take your time on this one!
____.
“But do people know where to find wisdom?
April 29 Where can they find understanding? No one knows
where to find it, for it is not found among the living.
Scripture Reading for today: Job 22, 23, 24, 25, and ‘It is not here,’ says the ocean. ‘Nor is it here, says
26 (skim it). the sea. It cannot be bought with gold. I t cannot be
purchased with silver. It cannot be purchased with
I have these two cabinets in my kitchen that are jewels mounted in fine gold. But do people know
always messy. I hate that. I like my cabinets neat and where to find wisdom? Where can they find
tidy. I think elves show up in the middle of the night understanding?” Job 28, selected verses NLT
and rearrange my pots and pans into a jumble of Where have you looked for wisdom and
chaos just to make my life miserable! I also hate it understanding?
when my garage and car are messy. Closets? I like I’ve stared into the face of the ocean and thought
those neat as a pin too. to myself, If I got to do this every day, my life would
You would not know this if you visited my house. be wonderful.
What I like and what I tolerate are often two I remember once upon a time a firmly held
different things. I realized this about myself as the conviction that if my kitchen was renovated to my
result of working through step four; once I “got it” – specifications, I’d be happy.
I developed some strategies to “solve it.” Those two I love that wedding ring upgrade I got a few years
cabinets are reasonably neat – the closets, garage ago. I enjoy it every time my eyes hit its sparkle.
and car are works in progress. But I’m getting there I thought if my children made a certain team and
– in large part because I took the fourth step. played a certain position, got into the right schools,
and at the right time find the right spouse, I’d be
Thought for today: Don’t worry about anything; perfectly content. I’ve even thought that if I could
instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you raise kids who didn’t self‐medicate and loved God
need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you with all their hearts, minds, and strength, I could be
will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything considered wise! Boy, was that delusional thinking!
we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts But Job is right. Even if we acquire those things,
and minds as you live in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:6‐ wisdom and understanding do not tag along with
7 NLT them.
I love my ocean vacations, but running away and
Thought for tomorrow: Honestly, there are probably joining the Navy isn’t in my future. I got that kitchen
some things that you’ve spent more time worrying renovation, and I’m still a mediocre cook who lets
over than it would have taken to acknowledge and her dirty dishes pile up in the sink. My wedding ring
resolve. I know that when we’re not living in healthy upgrade didn’t bring with it new skill sets for how to
space we like having unresolved problems to distract stay blissfully wed. I’ve had to look elsewhere for
ourselves with, but when we do that, we’re wasting that kind of wisdom. My children have made a
our time in needless anxiety. Even a halfway attempt variety of choices—and I’ve learned that I really had
at a fourth step can bring some awesome results. If very little to do with them—whether they were for
you’ve been avoiding your fourth step like the good or not quite right.
plague, just do it halfway. I suspect that a half‐done So, where have you looked for wisdom and
fourth step will be so rewarding that you’ll be understanding?
pumped to complete it. Let me know if it works for
you. Thought for today: Take a few minutes and
inventory all the places you’ve looked to find your
89
hope, your peace, and your purpose. How’s that
working for you?

Thought for tomorrow: God alone understands the
way to wisdom; he knows where it can be fund, for
he looks through the whole earth and sees STEP 5 We admitted to God, to ourselves, and to
everything under the heavens. And this is what he another human being the exact nature of our
says to all humanity: “The fear of the Lord is true wrongs.
wisdom; to forsake evil is real understanding.” Job
28, selected verses NLT May 1

Scripture Reading for today: Job 30 ‐ 32

One of my favorite Bible stories is found in Genesis
18. Three strangers have shown up at Abraham’s
house. It appears that two were angels, and one was
the Lord Himself. They spoke prophesies of a return
visit and delivered a promise. Truly, it’s a
restatement of a promise given many years ago. It
seems that in the grand scheme of God, Sarah is
destined to have a baby.
I suspect with the advanced age of both Sarah and
her husband, Abraham, those two had long ago
given up on having a child. Barren and elderly, Sarah
thought this idea preposterous. (Further reading of
the scriptures will tell us that indeed, God does
deliver on this promise.) So what is Sarah’s
response? She laughs.
At this point in the story, we stumble upon my
personal favorite subplot. The Lord turns to
Abraham and asks him why Sarah laughed. (Imagine
your great‐grandma getting pregnant, and see if that
might bring a mirthful response from you!)
Sarah lies and says, “I did not laugh.”
The Lord says, “Yes, you did laugh.”
“I did not!”
“Did too!”
“Did not!”
“Did too!” And thus, we have the first recorded
“He said, she said” conversation in history!
I always re‐read this account prior to completing a
fifth step. Like Sarah, I am often reluctant to admit
things to God, others, and even myself. And here’s
the part that really bugs me: I sometimes have
trouble admitting minor stuff too. Sarah was asked
to admit to laughter—not capital murder! And yet
she just couldn’t quite pull the trigger and say, “I
laughed.”

90
Who could fault Sarah for a little chuckle? I’ve to admit much of anything. In fact, most sick families
heard others take Sarah’s inventory and share a common trait: don’t tell. This serves no one
commentate that this shows a lack of faith. I don’t well. It keeps sick people from getting much‐needed
know about that one! I’ve been pregnant three help. It makes innocent people bear the brunt of
times, and I am now past the typical years one thinks others’ dysfunctions. It limits options and avoids
of as childbearing. If God showed up at my house solutions.
with some buddies and told me I was going to have a In lots of families it is unsafe to reveal a
child—wow—let’s just say a little chuckle would be shortcoming, vulnerability, or weakness. This is a
the least offensive response likely to pop out of my shame, because God’s desire for families is for lots of
mouth. healthy problem solving within the home. Unhealthy
Fortunately, we also have Job as a teacher and families tend to be chaotic, capricious, and
guide. We know from watching him struggle that inconsistent. They can be rigid and rule‐driven or
God is not offended by our honesty. History has absent of guidance entirely. Love is conditional, and
revealed several key things that stir God’s wrath, but life is unpredictable. Discipline is sporadic and
us being honest with him is not one of them. So like sometimes cruel.
Job, we can be honest with God. That will be an Even in healthy families, children can learn that
important point to keep in mind when you review being yourself is not a good idea. When I was a kid I
your fourth‐step inventory and approach the throne loved to read. I was fascinated by the wonderful
of grace with it clutched tightly in your fist. world of books! I am quite sure I was obnoxious,
persistent, difficult, and boring in my nightly
Thought for today: For the word of God is full of recounting of every little detail contained in my
living power. It is sharper than the sharpest knife, current reading pleasure. I believed I was sharing
cutting deep into our innermost thoughts and precious gems. My family did not share this view.
desires. It exposes us for what we really are. Nothing And I get that as an adult. As a child, I did not. I got
in all creation can hide from him. Everything is naked teased about my voracious reading habits. No one
and exposed before his eyes. This is the God to whom intended a bit of harm; they just wanted a moment’s
we must explain all that we have done. This is why peace. As a child, I concluded that something was
we have a great High Priest who has gone to heaven, wrong with being me, and soon I stopped sharing. I
Jesus the son of God. Let us cling to him and never don’t think many of us will be sent to juvie for
stop trusting him. This High Priest of ours excessive reading. But if we learn to stop sharing the
understands our weaknesses, for he faced all of the innocuous part of ourselves, do you think it will be
same temptations we do, yet he did not sin. So let us easy to share the dark secrets of the soul?
come boldly to the throne of our gracious God. There
we will receive his mercy, and we will find grace to Thought for today: He who conceals his sins does not
help us when we need it. Hebrews 4:12‐16 NLT prosper, but whoever confesses and renounces them
finds mercy. Proverbs 28:13 NIV
Thought for tomorrow: Confession isn’t for sissies.
But it has helped me take this important next right Thought for tomorrow: Admitting the exact nature
step when I understand the character and intentions of our wrongs is a hard thing to do. But in the right
of the One to whom I must come clean. environment, having come to know the awesome,
loving God of scripture and with the right supporting
May 2 real‐life God‐representative—it can be a comforting
time of healing.
Scripture Reading for today: Job 33 ‐35
May 3
The fifth step is all about admitting stuff. Big and
small, good and bad—anything that ended up in our Scripture Reading for today: Job 36‐38 skim
fourth‐step inventory is about to be revealed to
others. Most unhealthy families don’t teach us how
91
When I was in labor with our first child, I got so this to illustrate the point of love covering a
scared I thought I was going to die from fright. My multitude of sins, because my team does that for
husband still jokes that we used all our Lamaze me. I’ll send out an email and tell them something is
breathing techniques before we arrived at the attached, and they’ll send back some snappy reply
hospital. But a single thought carried me through the asking if I wrote it in invisible ink. Accountability
day and into the evening: Many others have gone laced with lots of sugar—I love that. My shortcoming
before me, so I am not alone. has to do with a lack of attention to detail, but my
This same principle holds true for those of us team demonstrates over and over how well they
embarking on the confession process. Others have love me—warts and all. That was my point but I
gone before us, and have reported back. Good think God had an additional one. Since the day I
things happen when we step up to the plate and tell confessed this shortcoming, I have remembered to
the truth about who we are and what we’ve been attach documents most of the time. Now I get emails
doing. (For more information and scripture support back saying, “Hey, what’s up with you? You attached
of this premise, check out The Christ‐Centered 12 the document…” (Some people are never happy!)
Step Study Guide, which is available on our Web site God reminded me through this silly story that
or our book tables.) when we confess something and bring it into the
light, powerful things happen. I can’t explain how
Thought for today: Count yourself lucky, how happy that confession has resulted in better attention to
you must be—you get a fresh start, your slate’s detail on my part. But I can’t argue with the
wiped clean. evidence. I may not know how, but I do know who.
Count yourself luck—God holds nothing against you God is in the business of restoration and renovation.
and you’re holding nothing back from him. He is Rapha God—healing us, one stitch at a time
When I kept it all inside, my bones turned to powder, (Rapha is Hebrew meaning healing, one stitch at a
my words became daylong groans. The pressure time).
never let up; all the juices of my life dried up.
Then I let it all out; I said, “I’ll make a clean breast of Thought for today: Are you hurting? Pray. Do you
my failures to God.” feel great? Sing. Are you sick? Call the church leaders
Suddenly the pressure was gone—my guilt dissolved, together to pray and anoint you with oil in the name
my sin disappeared. These things add up. of the Master. Believing—prayer will heal you, and
Every one of us needs to pray; when all hell breaks Jesus will put you on your feet. And if you’ve sinned,
loose and the dam bursts we’ll be on high ground, you’ll be forgiven—healed inside and out. Make this
untouched. Psalm 32:1‐6 The Message your common practice: Confess your sins to each
For everything that was written in the past was other and pray for each other so that you can live
written to teach us, so that through endurance and together whole and healed. The prayer of a person
the encouragement of the Scriptures we might have living right with God is something powerful to be
hope. Romans 15:4 NIV reckoned with. James 5:13‐16 The Message

Thought for tomorrow: We are so fortunate to live Thought for tomorrow: Perhaps the only thing that’s
in a time of history that affords us the benefits of hindering your restoration and renovation is a
hindsight. Let’s not waste the blessing. reluctance to confess. Is that possible?

May 4 May 5

Scripture Reading for today: Job 39 –42 Scripture Reading for today: 2 Chronicles 11 ‐ 13

One Sunday I confessed a shortcoming in church. “Who is this that questions my wisdom with such
Embedded in my sermon, I told a story about how I ignorant words?” Job 38:2 NLT
was bad, so very, very bad, at remembering to This was written to Job but is applicable to us all.
attach a document when sending out emails. I told
92
Have you ever considered how often we question May 6
the wisdom of God?
We question God’s wisdom every time we do what Scripture Reading for today: 2 Chronicles 14 ‐ 16
feels good rather than doing what we know to be
right. I wonder if you thought yesterday’s devotional
We question God’s wisdom every time we tear about admitting that we question the wisdom of
down, rather than build up (self or others). God seemed out of place in this series. I brought up
We question God’s wisdom every time we love the topic for two reasons:
things and use people. 1. To remind us that God is the kind of God who
We question God’s wisdom every time we live doesn’t get insecure or defensive when we approach
with the burden of shame and condemnation. him in a messy way; He can handle our “stuff”
We question God’s wisdom every time we fail to without it becoming all about “Him.” (God’s
respond immediately when overcome with a feeling character empowers Him to meet us where we are
of conviction. without demanding that we conform to who He
We question God’s wisdom every time we live in wants us to become. In God’s ideal plan, we should
darkness rather than by the warm light of His love. see this same attitude modeled for us in other
We question God’s wisdom every time we think and humans. If we haven’t, then we are startled by God’s
do independently of Him. response to Job.) I think this is important to
It’s normal to question. We’ll discover as we read remember so that we focus on being honest with
along that God challenges Job without condemning God, not just trying to sound good to Him in a
him. Asking tough questions is a natural part of an misguided attempt to win His approval. God deeply
intimate connection whether one is in relationship loves us; we’re not in some sort of contest trying to
with God or fellow humans. But we must realize that win His affection. If honesty in relationships has not
we too question God’s wisdom. served you well in the past, I want you to realize how
hard step five is going to be for you to complete. It’s
Thought for today: We have much to say about this, not impossible, but it is a challenge. Even now I pray
but it is hard to explain because you are slow to that the Holy Spirit is at work—making you both
learn. In fact, though by this time you ought to be willing and able!
teachers, you need someone to teach you the 2. I want us to get the point that a lot of our
elementary truths of God’s word all over again. You wrongdoing is related to questioning the wisdom of
need milk, not solid food! Anyone who lives on milk, God. Actually, it’s not so much the fact that we
being still an infant, is not acquainted with the question God’s wisdom as it is that we don’t realize
teaching about righteousness. But solid food is for we are questioning His wisdom. Confusing? How
the mature, who by constant use have trained about an example? Job questioned God straight up,
themselves to distinguish good from evil. Hebrews and God answered. I suspect that God appreciated
5:11‐14 NIV the fact that Job didn’t pretend with Him. It could
have gone down very differently. Remember back at
Thought for tomorrow: God is not shocked when the beginning of Job’s trials when his wife suggested
we do silly things. He does, however, desire for us to that Job just get the misery over with and kill himself
learn from our mistakes. One of the ways we get (Job 2:9)? Job responded by trusting God. He
trained for our next grand epic adventure is by answered his wife by saying that God was in charge,
developing the discernment to distinguish good from and not Job. Therefore, by implication, the number
evil. We must seek a heart transplant from God so of Job’s days were God’s business—not Job’s
that our greatest desire is to avoid evil and to do decision. Job could have made a different choice. He
good. The writer of Hebrews seems a bit agitated could have impaled himself on the nearest steeple or
that his listeners were slow to learn. I understand fallen on his sword or thrown himself off the nearest
that but would like to add my own thought: better a cliff. One who doubts the wisdom of God and isn’t
slow learner than no learner at all. honest about his/her questions often makes choices
independent of his beliefs about who God is and
93
how one lives because of that belief (and these May 7
choices usually show up in an inventory). A doubting
Job, in great physical, emotional, and spiritual pain Scripture Reading for today: Psalm 22 – 24; and 2
could have committed suicide as a way to avoid his Chronicles 14
messy life. So it is true that Job eventually questions
God, but in his daily life experiences, he doesn’t let The following is from an interview with Corrie ten
his doubt determine his behavior. He deliberately Boom, who spent many years in a Nazi
chooses to step in the way that He understands God concentration camp; Ms. Ten Boom was a Christian
would have him step—whether he agrees, imprisoned for being a sympathizer to the Jewish
understands, or appreciates the stepping experience people.
or not. Thus, suicide is not an option. So my friends, The special temptation of concentration camp
that’s why I am suggesting that it is far better to life—the temptation to think only of oneself, took a
acknowledge our questioning of God’s wisdom than thousand cunning forms. I knew this was self‐
ignore our fits of unbelief. centered, and even if it wasn’t right, it wasn’t so very
wrong, was it? Not wrong like sadism and murder
Thought for today: When Job prayed for his friends, and the other monstrous evils we saw every day.
the Lord restored his fortunes. In fact, the Lord gave Was it coincidence that joy and power drained
him twice as much as before! Then all his brothers, from my ministry? My prayers took on a mechanical
sisters, and former friends came and feasted with ring. Bible study reading was dull and lifeless, so I
him in his home. And they consoled him and struggled on with worship and teaching that had
comforted him because of all the trials the Lord had ceased to be real. Until one afternoon when the truth
brought against him. So the Lord blessed Job in the blazed like sunlight in the shadows. And so I told the
second half of his life even more than in the group of women around me the truth about myself—
beginning. Job lived 140 years after that, living to see my self‐centeredness, my stinginess, my lack of love.
four generations of his children and grandchildren. That night real joy returned to my worship. 16
Then he died, an old man who had lived a long, full
life. Job 42, selected verses NLT Thought for today: The lamp of the LORD searches
the spirit of a man; it searches out his inmost being.
Thought for tomorrow: So here’s what I’m thinking. Proverbs 20:27 NIV
Step five is a lot like Job’s experience. Job tries to
make sense of his life, his suffering, and God’s plan Thought for tomorrow: Who would blame Corrie
for him. After taking a fearless moral inventory (and for thinking only of herself? Imprisoned in a death
finding himself blameless—something we won’t camp, how does one come to believe that they are
probably share with Job—but we know is true sent there to serve others? I suspect that self‐pity
because that is how God described Job) Job sits and the other cunning forms of self‐centered living
down for a chat with God and others. In his may slither through your inventory list. Who would
particular case, his “others” aren’t the epitome of blame you for thinking only of your suffering? How
great sponsors, but God never disappoints. God will you or anyone else come to believe that the
brings clarity to Job’s questioning without feeling second half of your life might hold the promise of
burdened to explain the reasons behind all Job’s life joy? If it happened for Job and Corrie ten Boom, why
experiences. Job learns something about himself, not you? The only thing holding you back may be a
God, and others. God gives Job further instructions willingness to be honest with God, self, and others.
and Job steps as God speaks. And he is restored. May God grant you the wisdom and the courage to
That sounds good to me! allow His lamp to search your spirit!
That’s a nice outcome for a man willing to do both
a fourth and fifth step. What are you waiting for?

1616
Corrie ten boom, The Hiding Place (New York: Bantam books,
1971), pp. 27-28.
94
May 8 I was watching an episode of Dr. Phil where a guy
(60 days sober) was declaring his utter recovered‐
Scripture Reading for today: Psalm 25 and 2 ness. He was going on and on and on about how his
Chronicles 15 – 16 life was transformed. His future in‐laws weren’t
buying it. They argued that this guy had tried rehab
Today is a great day to NOT skip your numerous times and managed to “walk the line” of
recommended reading in the Psalms. It’s very step sobriety for months at a time—but never years. In
five‐esque. Read away! true Dr. Phil fashion, there was lots of drama and it
made for a great story.
Thought for today: So get rid of all evil behavior. Be So what do you think? Would you want him
done with all deceit, hypocrisy, jealousy, and all marrying your daughter on day 72 of sobriety?
unkind speech. Like newborn babies, you must crave As you read Psalm 26, the psalmist is also speaking
pure spiritual milk so that you will grow into a full of his integrity, innocence, pure motives, hatred of
experience of salvation. Cry out for this nourishment, evil, refusal to hang out with evil doers, and his firm
now that you have had a taste of the Lord’s kindness. stance on solid ground. That’s awesome. But I
1 Peter 2:1‐3 NLT wonder…is it true? Surely it was true for Job, and
when he made those rash statements his friends
Thought for tomorrow: One parting thought: don’t questioned his ability for self‐confrontation much
forget why you’re doing this. Oh, sure, it has a lot to like those potential in‐laws on Dr. Phil and I do when
do with the benefits reaped (and hoped for by the I read the words of this psalmist.
psalmist) as one confesses, but here’s a big‐vision
thought for you: your willingness to keep stepping Thought for today: For she cares nothing about the
through this process will determine the outcome for path to life. She staggers down a crooked trail and
others too. In your community, others are in need of doesn’t realize it. Proverbs 5:6 NLT
a person of integrity, wisdom, discernment,
kindness, patience, and willingness to serve others. Thought for tomorrow: God is the one to say how
In case you haven’t noticed, we’re living in a world of we’re really doing. We give Him that opportunity
hurt. This hurt is no respecter of socio‐economic when we admit to him the exact nature of the
status, race, creed, or any other measure we might wrongs that popped up as we inventoried our life.
employ to determine whether others are Let’s give him a chance to speak into our lives. If
experiencing the good life. Our communities are in we’re righteous as Job, the psalmist and the kid on
need of spiritual advocates who get what the good Dr. Phil—cool. If not, we know where to start
life really looks like AND who have the experience to working on our stuff.
point others in the right direction.
God isn’t trying to get us to behave like nuns; He May 10
wants us to grow up into the kind of people in whom
He can plant a grand epic adventure and watch it Scripture Reading for today: Psalm 27 and 2
thrive. (Maybe God will call you to be a nun with a Chronicles 19 ‐ 20
grand epic adventure and that’s cool, but my point is
that God is not withholding the good life from us or Over the years my husband and I have occasionally
asking us to live an austere life with no earthly enlisted our children’s help in ministry. Usually this
pleasures.) has involved tapping into their musical abilities. Lots
of times it’s been a request for patience when our
May 9 family schedule has needed to flex in order to
accommodate a pressing need of a hurting person or
Scripture Reading for today: Psalm 26 and 2 family. Once it resulted in a lost week of vacation as
Chronicles 17 and 18 we responded as a family to a ministry crisis.
Today, the tables turned. Our son needed his dad
to help him create a video for an assignment related
95
to his youth ministry internship. I so enjoyed system…the list is long. But unmerited grace should
watching Pete return the favor and rearrange his not be used as an excuse for unwillingness to own up
schedule in order to accommodate Scott’s ministry to one’s wrongdoing. Just because you’ve dodged
demands. the bullet today doesn’t mean you didn’t deserve
The story goes like this: Once, a long, long time consequences for your actions. Why not own up and
ago, when Pete was in college, he was taking an do the right thing, even if it looks like you can skate
applied math course. At midnight, after a rigorous through with no ill effect?
evening of rec basketball, Pete sat down to study for
a test the next day. After a few minutes, he realized May 11
that no amount of study (at this late hour) could
prepare him adequately for that test. Scripture Reading for today: Psalm 28 and 2
For no reason that he can explain, he reached into Chronicles 21 and 22
his desk and pulled out his very dusty Bible and
began to read. Suddenly, a peace that passes all Is it wrong to yell at your kids and call them
understanding overtook him, and he decided that stupid?
the best thing to do with such peace was to put it to Is it wrong to belittle your spouse in public, if you
bed. make it sound funny?
The next morning he woke up, went to math, took Is it wrong to take a wallet that you find on the
the test…and aced it. By his own admission, Pete street and consider this your lucky day?
realized that he had no clue where his answers Is it wrong to take supplies from your office and
sprung from or how he managed to score better use them personally, especially if you’re underpaid
than all his friends (who had foregone basketball to and not appreciated?
study). Anyway, he followed the exact same routine Is it wrong to have sex if you’re not married?
for the next test…and bombed it. Is it wrong to look at porn online?
It occurred to me that Pete’s willingness to tell the Is it wrong overeat and under‐exercise? (Or
story was a great example of admitting wrong. I’ve undereat and over‐exercise?)
heard him use the story to illustrate both the Is it wrong to drink alcohol?
miraculous power of God AND to warn others that Is it wrong to live from paycheck to paycheck?
presuming on God’s grace might not be the best plan Is it wrong to help with your children’s homework?
in the world. Is it wrong to expect your children to manage their
The psalmist is counting on God to hold him close own schoolwork without any input from you?
even if his parents abandon him. This speaks to The answers to these kinds of questions will no
God’s love, grace, and mercy. But I don’t think it doubt vary for many of us. If you grew up in a family
should give us an excuse to be cocky about our where someone regularly smacked you around,
wrongs. Wrongdoing is serious business in the maybe a little yelling and name calling sounds like no
kingdom of God. big deal to you. Perhaps living from paycheck to
paycheck is a giant step up from the welfare
Thought for today: Who can say, “I have kept my existence you were accustomed to last year. Some
heart pure; I am clean and without sin”? Proverbs people can drink alcohol and it’s a fine choice; for
20:9 NIV others it’s a slow form of suicide.
I’m not saying that all our dilemmas about right
Thought for tomorrow: I know that lots of us have and wrong are relative. Some are just plain right;
experienced unmerited grace. Examples that come others clearly wrong. But there are some issues that
to my mind include: a kid I know whose dad just are fuzzy that reasonable people can disagree on
bailed him out of jail for the umpteenth time with no without either one needing a bad guy label. How we
thanks from the child, a wife I know who chooses to answer these questions will determine what we
forgive her husband’s infidelity, a child of alcoholic define as wrongdoing, and that’s an important issue
parents who is choosing to not self‐medicate with when it comes to doing a fifth step.
alcohol and drugs in spite of his chaotic family
96
Thought for today: All scripture is inspired by God packed for a class or it’s too yucky to get outside. My
and is useful to teach us what is true and to make us DVD‐driven inspiration keeps telling me that if I want
realize what is wrong in our lives. 2 Timothy 3:16 NLT to “re‐sculpt” my body I will need to require my
If you’re having trouble making a list of “wrongs,” body to do things it does not want to do. Did you
take some time each day to peer intently into the hear that? If we want to “re‐sculpt” our lives, we’re
scriptures and see what looks back. going to need to require things of ourselves that we
don’t want to do. Like confession. I’d love to
Thought for tomorrow: Scripture helps me answer continue this discussion, but I’ve been sitting for
some of my pressing questions about right and several hours and now it’s time to go do some
wrong. I’m glad God saw fit in His infinite wisdom to vigorous exercise…even though my body would
provide this resource for us. prefer a nap.

May 12 May 13

Scripture Reading for today: 2 Chronicles 23 and Scripture Reading for today: 2 Chronicles 24 and
Psalm 29 and Mark 1 Psalm 30 and Mark 2

Admitting our wrongs is a three‐fold process of I love the gospel of Mark. I love how the writer
confession. First, we admit our wrongs to God, then tells of Jesus’ power and provides evidence of how
we admit our wrongs to ourselves and then we admit Jesus uses the power given to him for good. Some
our wrongs to another human being. This process people misuse their power. Maybe you’ve suffered
can be a powerful, life‐changing experience. We all at the hands of power misused. Have you ever
long to be known; to share the secrets that are so misused power and caused another to suffer? Jesus
toxic to our souls; to experience the grace of being didn’t do that. But what he did do is this: He made it
loved and accepted – sins and all. The spiritual possible for people like us‐‐abused and/or abusers—
discipline of confession provides the structure within to find a powerful solution to our unremitting pain
which we can experience this grace in practical caused by power improperly used.
ways… Confession is an act of obedience to a (see In particular, I hope you’ll read about Jesus’ call to
James 5:16) biblical imperative. It is an imperative Matthew (also known as Levi): “Follow me and be
with a promise of healing. 17 my disciple,” Jesus said to him. So Levi got up and
followed him. (Mark 2:14). Matthew was a tax
Thought for today: Blessed is he whose collector. His job was to collect taxes from the
transgressions are forgiven, whose sins are covered. Jewish community and send it to the Romans—the
Blessed is the man whose sin the Lord does not count oppressors of the Jewish people during this time in
against him and in whose spirit is no deceit. When I history. A Jew himself, Matthew would have been
kept silent, my bones wasted away through my considered a terrible sinner by his fellow Jews. He
groaning all day long. For day and night our hand not only took from them and sent it to the enemy;
was heavy upon me; my strength was sapped as in he personally profited from the exchange.
the heat of summer. Then I acknowledged my sin to And this is the part that makes me cry. Jesus
you and did not cover up my iniquity. I said, “I will invited Matthew to join Him in His grand epic
confess my transgressions to the Lord”—and you adventure. He took a guy that the community saw as
forgave the guilt of my sin. Psalm 32:1‐5 NIV a bad guy, and he reframed the entire experience
through the wonderful power of grace and mercy.
Thought for tomorrow: I have this exercise DVD
that I love to do at home when my schedule is too Thought for today: “Then you will call upon me and
come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will

seek me and find me when you seek me with all your
17
Recovery from Guilt, 6 studies for groups or individuals by Dale heart. I will be found by you,” declares the Lord, “and
and Juanita Ryan, Copyright 1992, this and other excellent series
are available from www.christianrecovery.com, p.5.
97
will bring you back from captivity.” Jeremiah 29:12‐ swollen at the elbow to about the size of Rhode
14 NIV Island. He was so sore and tired that he wasn’t going
to tackle his dreaded math homework until the wee
Thought for tomorrow: The invitation to join Jesus hours of the morning. I suspect God knew my boy
was not the transformation part of the story; it’s needed to be reminded that the Lord’s love never
simply the part that made the transformation fails (even when the ref doesn’t call a penalty on the
possible. Matthew could have told Jesus to go fly a guy who decked him), the Lord’s mercies never
kite. He could have ignored the invitation to cease (even when you’re tired and still have math to
discipleship. And you, of course, can do the same. do), the Lord’s mercies begin afresh each morning
But it is my prayer that as the Holy Spirit whispers in (tomorrow will be another day).
your ear, Come, follow me and be my disciple, that
you’ll haul yourself up and follow. But I’m warning Thought for today: Yet I still dare to hope when I
you, eventually you’re going to have to go through remember this: The faithful love of the Lord never
the confession process in order to experience power ends! His mercies never cease. Great is his
properly placed in your life. faithfulness; his mercies begin afresh each morning.”
Lamentations 3:21‐22 NLT
May 14
Thought for tomorrow: I hope you can recall these
Scripture Reading for today: 2 Chronicles 25 and truths too as you approach Him with your
Psalm 31 and Mark 3 confessions. If you’re hesitant to approach God,
notice what you’re thinking about God. Maybe you
Last night one of our sons asked me why need to start out by confessing your forgetfulness of
Lamentations was in the Bible. Since he’s the third His character.
born, I had the good sense to realize that he
probably wasn’t expecting an answer so much as he May 15
was interested in a dialogue, so I said, “Why do you
think it’s there?” Scripture Reading for today: 2 Chronicles 26 and
“Well, since I doubt that God’s goal was to Psalm 32 and Mark 4
encourage whining, I wonder if it has something to
do with this verse, Yet I still dare to hope when I I suppose most of us think that the easiest part of
remember this: The faithful love of the Lord never “admitting wrongs” is to ourselves. I wonder if
ends! His mercies never cease. Great is his you’re tempted to skim over that little two word
faithfulness; his mercies begin afresh each morning.” phrase “to ourselves” because you think that since
“Funny that you came to that verse,” I said. “That you already did your fourth step, what more is
is exactly the same verse I was looking at earlier in needed?
the week. I was feeling kind of whiney and decided But lest we forget, most of us are masters at
to hang with someone who could truly understand deception ‐ especially self‐deception. For instance, I
me, so I read Lamentations. That’s the verse I was out shopping for some new wardrobe additions,
underlined!” which is not my favorite thing to do. Fortunately, I
Notice that I didn’t answer his question, and his ran smack into a good story, and that made the
prompt exit seemed to indicate that he didn’t notice whole trip worthwhile.
my non‐response. I think the kid just needed to I was in my changing room, minding my own
confess to me what he had just re‐discovered and business, when much to my dismay another
have someone who could join him in this reminder. customer began berating the salesperson. Normally,
I think that because of the circumstances I ignore berating. But this particular salesperson
surrounding the evening. We had returned home happened to be a personal friend. And I can speak
from a tough lacrosse loss. He got hit so hard his jaw with complete confidence on this: she is an
wouldn’t work right, and he had a loose tooth (even awesome help if you’re stuck in a changing room
though he was wearing a helmet); his arm was trying to find a new outfit that you’ll wear for ten
98
years and you only have ten minutes to look, decide, and face our human failings with the same
and purchase. compassion for ourselves that God extends toward
“What’s wrong with these manufacturers? They us.” (p.5)
keep making these clothes smaller and smaller. I’ve I wonder what’s lurking in your shadows, waiting
been a size eight for 30 years! Take it all back. to be exposed to God’s warm and gracious light.
Obviously, this has become a cheap store with
tawdry merchandise.” She then flung a pile of Thought for today: This is the verdict: Light has come
clothes at my friend and stormed off. into the world, but men loved darkness instead of
Okay, I looked. All I can say is that from my light because their deeds were evil. Everyone who
viewpoint, that woman is definitely not a size eight. does evil hates the light, and will not come into the
That’s all I’ll say on the subject. My lips are sealed. light for fear that his deeds will be exposed. But
But the moment inspired me to flee my shopping whoever lives by the truth comes into the light, so
nightmare and return to my studies. Truthfully, we that it may be seen plainly that what he has done
can all relate to this woman who can’t quite admit to has been done through God. John 3:19‐21 NIV
herself that she is no longer a petite size eight.
Thought for tomorrow: Have you ever thought it
Thought for today: All a man’s ways seem innocent odd that God forgives you but you refuse to forgive
to him but motives are weighed by the Lord. yourself? What does that mean? Would that imply
Proverbs 16:2 that you’re more just than God? (That can’t be the
I also like how the New Living Translation words answer.) So what does it mean that it’s okay for God
this verse…People may be pure in their own eyes, but to extend forgiveness but for us to refuse to extend
the Lord examines their motives. it to ourselves? It’s a common complaint. “I just
can’t forgive _______ .” So we sigh and move along
Thought for tomorrow: So I think sometimes this is the same dark paths. It’s just too much, too hard—
the hardest part of step five: telling ourselves the this forgiveness gig. But pause to prepare. Stop and
truth. Tomorrow, I’m going to borrow liberally from reread John 3. Read that last sentence over and over
some advice the Drs. Ryan offer in their Bible study until you see it. Do you? When you forgive—whether
entitled “Recovery from Guilt.” I think they have a it is yourself or someone else—IT ISN’T YOU DOING
lot to say to us that might help us over this particular IT AT ALL! God is doing it through you. And the facts
recovery hurtle. are in: God is in the forgiveness business. He knows
how to do it and He practices what He hopes we’re
May 16 preaching. Admission moves us closer to forgiveness.

Scripture Reading for today: 2 Chronicles 27 and May 17
Psalm 33 and Mark 5
Scripture Reading for today: 2 Chronicles 28 and
In Drs. Dale and Juanita Ryan’s bible study called, Psalm 34 and Mark 6
Recovery From Guilt, which you can find at
www.christianrecovery.com, they speak of the two One time I had something tough that I needed to
reasons why we need to admit the truth about admit to another human and I chose poorly. Here’s
ourselves to ourselves. “First, admitting our wrongs just a sample of what I heard that day. “I can’t
to ourselves means that we are no longer deceiving believe you did that. What were you thinking? I’m
ourselves. This admission involves embracing parts of very disappointed in you. You call yourself a
ourselves that we have rejected. It involves a believer? If you just read scripture and prayed more,
complex process of integrating what some have none of this would have happened!”
called the shadow parts of ourselves into our self I didn’t give up. Armed with what I knew from
understanding. Second, admitting our wrongs to God’s word, I just had a feeling that this was not the
ourselves means that we need to show mercy to response God would have wanted me to receive.
ourselves. We need to stop demanding perfection This time, Eureka! I can’t say it was fun, but it was
99
fantastic. My second friend had what it took on that “What should I do?”
particular day not to let me off the hook of my “Tell me what to do!”
wrongdoing and yet somehow managed not to “I just wish I knew what to do about this.”
skewer me with the hook’s pointy edge. In fact, I felt Recovery is all about death and rebirth. Letting go
as if my friend deftly and gently acted as God’s is required. We let go of self‐destructive behaviors,
assistant while He performed open heart surgery, old ways of thinking, and anything else that stands in
healing my aching broken heart. our way of becoming a sane person. Picking up is
Sometimes we shop around, looking for people to also happening. We begin to replace some old ways
tell us what we want to hear. This is not what I’m with new, healthier, and more productive choices.
talking about. I’m asking you to shop ‘til you drop – It’s not just about letting go; it’s important to realize
until you find the person that can tell you what God that we are replacing old with new.
wants you to hear – without blame, shame, or This messy letting go and picking up results in
condemnation. This takes a very special person. (The more than a few moments of disequilibrium. Even
very kind of individual that you are growing into!) though we know it’s good stuff, it’s confusing too. So
we’re tempted to try to take a shortcut and just get
Thought for today: For the word of God is full of someone else to tell us what to do, how to think,
living power. It is sharper than the sharpest knife, and what to feel.
cutting deep into our innermost thoughts and There’s another complication. As we work through
desires. It exposes us for what we really are. Nothing our steps, being of service to others is a key element.
in all creation can hide from him. Everything is naked It’s part of picking up. The “others” that are
and exposed before his eyes. This is the God to whom equipped to listen to a fifth step are “us”—those of
we must explain all that we have done. This is why us who have chosen this path for our own lives. This
we have a great High Priest who has gone to heaven, can be a case of good news/bad news if we’re not
Jesus the Son of God. Let us cling to him and never super careful. An “other” who listens regularly to
stop trusting him. This High Priest of ours spoken inventories can become more interested in
understands our weaknesses, for he faced all of the telling others what to do than working their own
same temptations we do, yet he did not sin. So let us recovery program. So be cautious. Don’t ask your
come boldly to the throne of our gracious God. There listener to tell you what to do; allow them the
we will receive his mercy, and we will find grace to privilege of listening. If you are an “other,” watch
help us when we need it. Hebrews 4:12‐16 NIV yourself. Be careful that you don’t slip into problem
solving, advice giving, or playing‐God mode. The key
Thought for tomorrow: Hebrews four makes ingredient in a fifth step is admission. A fifth step is
reference to scripture being sharper than a two‐ NOT: a time to discuss how the wrongs came about,
edged sword. Some translations say it is sharper a time to strategize future changes, and it is not
than the sharpest knife. I’ve heard theologians speak about seeking advice or getting counseled. It should
about how the words used in this passage are never be packaged with judgment—yours or others’.
surgical terms. Certainly that’s what I experienced This is very simple: admit wrongdoing and be
during my fifth‐step process. It was like surgery. specific.
We’ve been pretty skilled at medicating our aches
and pains, hoping to avoid suffering. A step five Thought for today: O Lord, we acknowledge our
affords us the opportunity to begin healing the sore wickedness and the guilt of our fathers; we have
that so desperately needs medical attention—a indeed sinned against you. Jeremiah 14:20 NIV
wound that is hurting our spirit.
Thought for tomorrow: Horrible things sometimes
May 18 pop up in our inventory. It’s shocking. It’s natural
and normal to pause and dissect it. Of course we
Scripture Reading for today: 2 Chronicles 29 and want to make sense of senseless bad acts. Face it.
Psalm 35 and Mark 7 Even we don’t always understand the choices we’ve
made. But this is not the time to pick at those scabs.
100
We’re just naming them! I find it helpful both to “Oh, I do!!! In fact, this one is my favorite:“It is
prepare and to debrief with prayer. Think of prayer what comes from inside that defiles you. For from
as powerful bookends that surround your life’s story. within, out of a person’s heart, come evil thoughts,
Ask for God to reveal truth, empower you to admit sexual immorality, theft, murder, adultery, greed,
truth, and guide your “other.” Afterwards, I wickedness, deceit, lustful desires, envy, slander,
particularly appreciate an extended time of silence pride and foolishness. All these vile things come from
with God. It makes sense to me that after a time of within; they are what defile you.” She’s quoting
talking, I need to counterbalance that with at least from memory Mark 7, verses 20‐23.
as much time listening. It’s amazing how much we I sat there silent and still. Her postcard‐sized list
can learn about what we should do after an had not mentioned anything more foolish than a
extended time alone with the Lord. penchant for desserts. I know her story and I would
have thought her list would have been an itsy‐bitsy
May 19 bit longer. But it’s not my job to judge the list. I’m
here to tell the truth and affirm her when she tells it
Scripture Reading for today: 2 Chronicles 30; Mark 8 too. It’s not my job to pretend I’m the Holy Spirit
and 9 and try to guide her into all truth. That’s His job.
I notice that tears begin to puddle up in the
“I’ve done it. I’m ready to go over it.” bottom of her eyes. Eventually they begin cascading
“Okay.” Prayers are lifted up, and the fifth‐step down her face. Wiping furiously, soon she gives up
process begins. My friend whips out her index card and allows them to soak her shirt. Something
and enumerates her sins which include eating too marvelous and mysterious is happening, and I’m
much chocolate and not exercising enough, but she trying my best not to ruin it.
fails to mention that time she “accidentally” left her “There’s some other stuff too.” And for the next
child at daycare for three days because she got high three hours I listen without moving a muscle as this
at lunch and hung out in a crack house until her young woman pours out her foolishness, pride,
money ran out. slander, envy, lustful desires and adulterous acts, her
I’m tempted, oh so tempted, to go codependent. greed, wickedness, and sexual immorality. She talks
So I pray for the powerful working of God’s mighty about her history of stealing and then goes so far as
Spirit in me. If I don’t watch it, I’m going to have a to admit that the only reason she hasn’t murdered is
really long inventory of my own from today’s because her aim was off. That’s what can happen
session! when we allow God to be God, and stop deluding
Quickly she moves on to her strengths. One of the ourselves that we got the job.
strengths she lists is her love for God and His word.
She’s right. This is true of her, and I nod Thought for today: Jesus says…“If you love me, obey
appreciatively as she lists all the evidences of her my commandments. And I will ask the Father, and he
devotion to God. will give you another Advocate, who will never leave
Then she asks for feedback. It is perfectly you. He is the Holy Spirit, who leads into all truth.”
appropriate for her to do so. But as I pause to John 14:15‐17 NLT
prepare, I’m remembering what she is NOT asking
me to do: she’s not asking me to absolve her of guilt, Thought for tomorrow: The Holy Spirit is a powerful
advise her, counsel her, solve her problems, or judge advocate. I pray that you will invite Him not only to
her list. We’ve established the ground rules long participate, but to lead any fifth‐step session. He’s
before I agreed to listen to her story, and both of us thoroughly not codependent. He won’t worm His
understand my part in this meeting. way into the meeting if you don’t want Him there.
“I know you love God’s word and Him. I’m sure My friend was an addict who loved God and
your choices are confusing to you in light of your struggled with obeying his commandments. But even
desperate desire to follow him. I know you want to her most inadequate attempts to live her true God‐
step when He speaks. I know you study scripture. I created identity did not invalidate Jesus’ promise.
know you desire scripture to inform every step.” Gracious and merciful God did for my friend what
101
she could not do for herself; He showed her who she thing about himself that is causing him to miss it. I
was AND who He dreamed she would become. I’m hope the same is true for us, too. It’s okay to be sad,
so appreciative of the Holy Spirit’s presence in that sorrowful, and grieving. My prayer is that you will
room—closing my lips and opening her heart. embrace your suffering AND trust God to come close
to you.
May 20
May 21
Scripture Reading for today: 2 Chronicles 31 – 32;
Mark 10 Scripture Reading for today: 2 Chronicles 33 and 34;
Mark 11
…for your loyalty is divided between God and the
world. I used to have a lot of secrets and didn’t even
In Mark 10, a rich young man, who has no trouble know it! Have you ever been in the midst of a
at all inventorying his strengths, asks Jesus how he conversation, and someone says something, and you
can inherit eternal life. This is my speculation, but do have an “Aha” moment? That’s exactly what
you think he was looking for Jesus to say, “My happened to me! I was attending a support group
friend! You’re in the family! Someone as “good” as that focused on codependency issues (if you don’t
you has nothing to fear.”? I don’t know, call me know what that is all about, we have an Insight
crazy, but I think that’s what the guy was expecting. Journal all about it, Climbing Out of Codependency,
Here’s a really cool thing about Jesus. He gets us. that you can get on our web site
Even as the young man approaches and calls Jesus www.northstarcommunity.com) and the facilitator
“Good Teacher,” Jesus offers a gentle rebuke. This is was talking about keeping secrets.
the same Jesus who gladly hangs out with tax She explained to us that keeping secrets is
collectors and prostitutes, so a rebuke delivered as a “normal” in unhealthy families but not in healthy
result of one question, “Good Teacher, what must I ones. This was a news flash to me! It changed my
do to inherit eternal life?” certainly has my life. I can’t describe what happened, except to say
attention. Jesus gets this guy, and He desires for this that this one bit of new information opened my
fellow to get it too. world and flooded it with a shining light. I began to
The invitation to grow is given, and the man “went remember things long forgotten. I recalled things
away sad.” that had happened to me as a child that I “managed”
If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves with silence. Once I began this journey, I gained new
and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, he is insights. I had hidden these events from myself and
faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and had failed to revisit them since childhood. My adult
purify us from all unrighteousness. 1 John 1:8‐9 NIV eyes saw them from a wildly different perspective
than my “child” eyes had experienced them!
Thought for today: So humble yourselves before There was some pain involved. I had a relative
God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. Come who mistreated me. As a child, I felt “less than” and
close to God, and God will come close to you. Wash “not good enough.” Although I could acknowledge
your hands, you sinners; purify your hearts, for your that this person was a “character,” I had never
loyalty is divided between God and the world. Let realized that this behavior was very inappropriate.
there be tears for what you have done. Let there be Even now I resist typing “abusive.” There, I did it. It
sorrow and deep grief. Let there be sadness instead was abusive behavior. It was cruel. And this truth is
of laughter, and gloom instead of joy. Humble very hard to admit. There are some repercussions
yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up in for telling this truth. But, oh the consequences for
honor. James 4:7‐10 NLT keeping it secret is so much more destructive.
If you’ve got some secrets that you’ve been
Thought for tomorrow: Dr. Dale Ryan says, “There’s holding—yours or someone else’s—they are taking
that one little thing, that if you don’t get it, you miss their toll on you. I don’t know why God and I
it.” I hope in the future this guy gets that one little couldn’t have just worked through all this in my
102
private prayer time, but the 12 steps have shown me conveniently located on the screened porch. Usually
the value of having another person hear this we would bide our time, waiting for the evening’s
information too. I don’t know why this is crucial to activities like flashlight tag and capture the flag.
healing, but I can say that it has certainly been As I grew older, the cares of my little world taught
essential for me. me what others had known for many years: my
grandmother was a saint. She could listen to a
Thought for today: There is a way that seems right confession of wrongdoing and somehow
to a man, but in the end it leads to death. Proverbs communicate a blessing back to the confessor. I
14:12 NIV eventually abandoned the butterfly chairs, red
As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens pitcher, flashlight tag, and capture the flag. But I
another. Proverbs 27:17 NIV have never let go of the blessing that came as a
result of my grandmother’s attentive,
Thought for tomorrow: I can’t lie to you. This will compassionate, and listening ear.
cost you. If you take this step of ridding yourself of A fifth step is crucial for a million different reasons.
all secrets, you’re going to lose your title of But my favorite reasons are the blessings. Here are a
“King/Queen of Denial.” You’re going to be humbled few that I particularly appreciate:
by the process, so there goes the inflated ego and If you’ve ever had someone listen to your
false pride. Unforgiveness is going to be an issue too; wrongdoing, and respond appropriately, you never
often this kind of honesty brings with it a godly get over the experience. A piece of gratitude gets
supply of forgiveness. And last, but not least, you will lodged in your heart and refuses to budge. After
lose the loner lifestyle. Your secrets don’t make you that, you can never live comfortably in your
as different as you’ve believed. Once I started being resentments again.
honest, I found a whole new group of friends just If you’ve ever had someone accept your
like me! No longer hindered by my self‐imposed wrongdoing AND hold your potential in their hands
prison of uniqueness, I could get with the program simultaneously, it’s like experiencing heaven on
and start finding my joy. It’s a tough job handling all earth.
the freedom that comes from no longer being If you’ve ever had this gift, you will always dream
secretive, but someone’s got to do it! of someday returning the favor. Someday, I hope I
can sit with one who embraces suffering AND
May 22 captures the vision of God’s big dream for them. I
consider it my job to listen to suffering, and speak
Scripture Reading for today: 2 Chronicles 35 and 36; back blessing. I learned the value of that from my
Mark 12 grandmother.

When I was growing up, my favorite place in the Thought for today: Wounds from a friend can be
whole wide world was my grandmother’s house. I trusted, but an enemy multiplies kisses. Proverbs
loved visiting her. My best friend lived right across 27:5‐6 NIV
the cracked concrete driveway, so I had easy access
to a heavenly place of refuge. It was never a problem Thought for tomorrow: I don’t know if you’ve ever
when family and friends would come to visit my had someone who can bestow a blessing like my
“Mama” and she would shoo me outside for some grandmother did. We might be more familiar with
fresh air. I didn’t understand it then, but as an adult I someone who condemns us for wrongdoing and
realize that many people knew my grandmother was demands that we straighten up and fly right. Perhaps
a safe haven—a good person to listen to a fifth step. we’ve even met those who pity our pathetic states.
My best friend, Beth, and I enjoyed our shooing A real blessing comes when we can admit
experiences. Sometimes we’d drag canvas wrongdoing without thinking that our wrongs
“butterfly” shaped chairs up under the trees in the disqualify us from living God’s grand epic
back yard and tell our own secrets. Other times, adventures.
we’d push gently back and forth on the glider
103
May 23 life? Stack that up against your current life choices,
and see if your view clears.
Scripture Reading for today: Ezra 1 and 2; Mark 13
May 24
Do you ever struggle with the sins of others
blocking your view? Is there a person in your life Scripture Reading for today: Ezra 3 and 4; Mark 14
whose offense against you has been so great that it
makes all your sins look small (and not worth But prove yourselves doers of the word, and not
mentioning)? merely hearers who delude themselves. James 1:22
David is a biblical character of epic proportions. He NASB
was the slayer of the giant, Goliath; “a man after
God’s own heart;” the best king to ever rule Israel; We are easily deluded. Obvious, right? We’ve got
shepherd; musician; writer; and good looking. David bigger problems than our delusions. As each of us
had it going on. draws nearer to God, there is an enemy who is not
He had some hardships too. His brothers ridiculed happy that we’ve finally seen the light. Satan is real.
him, and as Rodney Dangerfield would have said, In John 10:10 his life purpose is clearly stated, “The
“He got no respect.” As an apprentice to King Saul, thief’s purpose is to steal and kill and destroy.”
David triggered Saul’s insecurities and was Whether you are actively stepping through the 12
eventually hunted down like a dog. On and on go Christ‐centered steps to recovery or taking a
David’s traumas. different path, I don’t want you to be misinformed.
David has a lot of life events that could easily block You have an enemy. There is a spiritual force of
his view of personal sin. David’s humanity does darkness that is hell‐bent (no pun intended) on
result in making sinful choices, including adultery stopping you from living out God’s grand epic
and murder—serious stuff. For years David hopes adventure. I know you have some tough truths to
that his role as King and his history of heroic deeds confess. Guilt, shame, and those dreaded “If onlys”
will cover over his sinful behavior. may be leaving you blue. But unconfessed sin isn’t
God has other ideas. He loves David too much to the only problem; we have a force that is
allow him to be devastated by a failure to complete intentionally seeking to steal our hope, kill our
a meaningful step four and five. So God sends dreams, and destroy our potential.
Nathan, a prophet, and David’s sin is exposed. The In that same John 10:10 passage, Jesus contrasts
list of all the people hurt by this sin was enormous, His purpose with Satan’s when he continues with
and we’ll talk about that in a later step. But to me, “My purpose is to give them a rich and satisfying
the fascinating part of David’s confession is his life.” He is talking to you. You were created for a
awareness of the enormity of his sin before God. rich and satisfying life. So don’t delude yourself. If
“Against you, and you alone, have I sinned; I have you are experiencing a “less than” life, something is
done what is evil in your sight.” Psalm 51:4 NLT wrong.
David has a moment of clarity and realizes that Fortunately, I delivered the bad news before the
although he has sinned against many, his greatest best news of all : you’ve got the power! I don’t mean
sin is against God. this in some distorted feel‐good representation of
God’s truth. You personally are powerless. But when
Thought for today: All a man’s ways seem innocent you become a follower of Christ, you receive a gift—
to him but motives are weighed by the Lord. a bestowed gift of power. It’s the power that can
Proverbs 16:2 NIV save your soul. It’s huge. You have the capacity to
live free.
Thought for tomorrow: God has big dreams for you Telling you that you have power is not enough to
and me too. So if your fourth step is no longer than a unleash that soul‐saving power in your daily living
short grocery list, give this some thought and prayer. experience. Right this moment I am sitting in my
Does anything new come to mind that you need to study not far from my exercise room. I have my
confess when you consider God’s desires for your exercise DVDs , treadmill, weights, medicine ball,
104
bands, and other instruments of torture that are promised is faithful. And let us consider how we may
supposed to be good for me. I have the potential to spur one another on toward love and good deeds. Let
be physically fit at my fingertips 24/7. But if I don’t us not give up meeting together, as some are in the
go up, stick on my shoes, and plug in the tape or turn habit of doing, but let us encourage one another—
on the treadmill or lift those weights and stretch and all the more as you see the Day approaching.
those bands, I will not live up to my fitness potential. Hebrews 10:19‐25 NIV
It’s still true‐‐I’ve got the power potential—but
without using my muscles, all I really have is a dusty Thought for tomorrow: Is today one of those no‐
room and a huge portion of guilt. hope days for you? You’re not alone. I hope you’ll
take the time to read and ponder the experience
Thought for today: So get rid of all the filth and evil Christ had in Mark 15. (You can find an in‐depth
in your lives, and humbly accept the word God has study of Jesus’ last week on earth at
planted in your hearts, for it has the power to save www.northstarcommunity.com. Look for the Insight
your souls. But don’t just listen to God’s word. You Journal, Finding Our Way Back To God, Part 3.)
must do what it says. Otherwise, you are only fooling
yourselves. James 1:21‐22 NLT May 26

Thought for tomorrow: You have the grand privilege Scripture Reading for today: Ezra 7 and 8; Mark 16
of taking this next step. The power potential is huge.
But you’ve got to be willing to accept God’s fitness Has your recovery journey left you feeling
plan: confess, accept, and then follow. bewildered? Just recently one of my friends said, “I
thought I’d feel better than this. For years, my wife
May 25 told me that if I stopped drinking, our life would be
so much better. And in some ways it is, but it’s not
Scripture Reading for today: Ezra 5 and 6; Mark 15 perfect. I’m scared. I feel all these feelings and I
don’t know what to do with them.”
If you’re not a big reader and you skim the My friend reminded me of the value of
recommended chapter reading today, you know this perspective. Perfect? Is that what he was shooting
isn’t a pleasant time for Jesus. He goes to trial, for? It reminds me of our confusion in pre‐recovery,
charged with a crime he didn’t commit. He’s mocked when we often mistake God’s job for ours. Playing
by all and beaten by many. Within hours he is God, being God, hoping to become perfect in all our
crucified, dead, and buried, and he takes the hopes ways—that’s part of our delusional system.
and dreams of all his believers with him. They don’t Highly successful people, people who make a
have the benefit of flipping a page in scripture and difference, people that we hope one day to emulate
sighing with relief when the next chapter heading — make mistakes. A famous model said recently, “I
blares out “The Resurrection.” Hope will soon be look at those magazine pictures of myself, and they
restored, but on this day, there is no hope in the aren’t me! Even I don’t look like the me those
hearts of those who believe. pictures portray.”
We’re not hoping to come out of this step‐five
Thought for today: Therefore, brothers, since we experience as perfect people—that’s not in the
have confidence to enter the most Holy Place by the cards. But we are challenged to consider our
blood of Jesus, by a new and living way opened for us potential. Let me ask you a question. If I told you
through the curtain, that is, his body, and since we that you were guaranteed to win Olympic Gold in
have a great priest over the house of God, let us the figure skating competition in 2008 if you entered
draw near to God, with a sincere heart in full into a rigorous training program with Will Ferrell
assurance of faith, having our hearts sprinkled to (think about the movie Blades of Glory) AND your
cleanse us from guilty conscience and having our success would make you famous beyond your
bodies washed with pure water. Let us hold wildest dreams, would you train? Of course you
unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who
105
would. You’d go for the gold if you were guaranteed May 27
success.
What do you think God has been saying to you all Scripture Reading for today: Ezra 7 and 8; Numbers
this time? God’s children are destined for 1 and 2
greatness—kingdom‐defined and God‐decided glory.
You were created for a grand epic adventure. Not Talk about inventories! Check out the counting
perfect, but perfectly glorious. found in the first two chapters of Numbers. Numbers
is a logical name for this book, but the editors of the
Thought for today: But you are a chosen people, a New Life Translation Recovery Bible point out that
royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people belonging the Hebrew name for the book is “In The
to God, that you may declare the praises of him who Wilderness.”
called you out of darkness into his wonderful light. If you’ve never been a big fan of this book, you
Once you were not a people, but now you are the might not know that the Israelites, freed by God
people of God; once you had not received mercy, but from their slavery in Egypt, did not have to spend
now you have received mercy. 1 Peter 2:9‐10 NIV forty years traveling to the Promised Land. The trip
itself was pretty short.
Thought for tomorrow: You’re a kid of the King! But the Israelites ended up in the wilderness as a
Queen Elizabeth visited the state of Virginia for our consequence of refusing to act on God’s promises.
400‐year anniversary. The news media diligently How many wilderness years have you
instructed us on the proper etiquette in case we experienced? Wilderness living may not be your
happen to bump into her while she’s here. High‐end destiny, but it could end up your final resting place if
hotels don’t call it the “royal treatment” for no you are unwilling to act on God’s promises to you.
reason. And you, my friend, are royalty. Royalty
carries both privilege and responsibility. As kids of Thought for today: It is for freedom that Christ has
the King, we live with some expectations that non‐ set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let
royal types never have to concern themselves with. yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery.
Dear friends, I urge you, as aliens and strangers in Galatians 5:1 NIV
the world, to abstain from sinful desires, which wage
war against your soul. Live such good lives among Thought for tomorrow: The Israelites rejoiced when
the pagans that, though they accuse you of doing freed from their captivity. They resisted living in a
wrong, they may see your good deeds and glorify way that would prevent a repeat of that slavery
God on the day he visits us. 1 Peter 2:11‐12 NIV experience. Past events in our lives may have caused
So here’s what I’m guaranteeing you. In the future, us to experience captivity at the hands of another.
you’re going to be an Olympic champion in the But the past is over, and we stand on the precipice
kingdom of God. You’re going to have power that of a personal choice: will we stand firm, or will we let
will save your very soul. You’re going to learn how to ourselves be burdened again by the yoke of slavery?
know and do the will of God. You’re going to be
given the mind of Christ. You’re going to be able to May 28
tell the difference between good and evil—and
choose good. You’re going to have both the capacity Scripture Reading for today: Numbers 3 – 5 (skim)
and the willingness to love God, others, and self.
You’re promised a future and hope. Promise. That I can’t wait to hear what you think about the last
and more is guaranteed for you—sitting like some half of chapter 5. I’m fascinated that a suspicious
beautifully wrapped gift, waiting for you to crack husband can accuse a wife of infidelity and “The
into it. But first, you’ve got to train… husband will be innocent of any guilt in this matter,
but his wife will be held accountable for her sin.” It’s
called a jealousy offering. I don’t understand these
historical references, but I do hear this message loud
and clear: even undetected sin is serious. Suppose a
106
man’s wife goes astray, and she is unfaithful to her about understanding who we are and what patterns
husband and has sex with another man, but neither need to change in our lives.)
her husband nor anyone else knows about ,”…even One pattern that is rampant in pre‐recovery is the
without getting caught…consequences happen. tendency to judge, blame and shame. Judging and
I never will forget this husband who confessed to blaming others is a fast and cheap manipulation
me about his adulterous affair and then minimized it designed to get the attention redirected from our
by saying that it was okay, because no one knew. It own shortcomings by highlighting the defects of
wasn’t six months later when the “no ones” turned others. One time this couple came to visit me and
into the almost everyone and the consequences of dragged their big problems with them. It seems the
that sin are still being revealed. Years have passed, wife had begun a torrid Internet affair and her
and now the small children, who he assured me husband discovered the infidelity. This posed quite
were “too young to understand”, have grown up and the dilemma for the husband—a minister committed
can speak for themselves. They come and sit next to to concepts like reconciliation and forgiveness. This
me at ballgames and tell me things. They tell me sad gentleman desired to live his faith with integrity and
things ‐ stories that remind me that we’re kidding his pain was intense. He was struggling with feelings
ourselves if we think secret sin doesn’t count or of betrayal, rage, and anger. He felt responsible to
presume that it will ever stay secret. We need to get rush to forgiveness, but his feelings were dragging
with the program and realize that we wear blinders their feet and not cooperating with his theology. Like
if we think sin is a small thing that’s hardly worth Job, he was trying to make sense of his pain, his
mentioning. beliefs, and his part in the story—messy but good
stuff.
Thought for today: “There is nothing concealed that The wife was a trip. I expected…embarrassment?
will not be disclosed, or hidden that will not be made Remorse? Sadness? Guilt? Shame? I don’t know! But
known. What you have said in the dark will be heard certainly not what I watched happen in that
in the daylight, and what you have whispered in the meeting! If I didn’t know the background story I
ear in the inner rooms will be proclaimed from the would have assumed that the wife was the offended
roofs .” Luke 12:2‐3 NIV party in this broken relationship. She blamed her
affair on her husband’s insensitivity (evidently he
Thought for tomorrow: Are you sure you’ve doesn’t put his shoes away), his work schedule (he
completed that fourth step rigorously? feels it inappropriate to leave work for 3 hours in the
middle of the day for her to take a tennis lesson),
May 29 etc. Married to a man with big shoes who often
leaves them in odd places, with a heavy work
Scripture Reading for today: Numbers 6 – 7 schedule not to mention his sports commitments,
etc. I understand her frustrations to a point. Even I, a
Earlier in this devotional series I mentioned the woman who likes to support her gender’s issues,
twin concepts of “letting go” and “picking up”— couldn’t see how shoes and schedules merited a
essential skills for transformation. Pete’s response of infidelity. But I also understood that this
grandmother quit smoking (letting go) AND started conversation had nothing to do with shoes or
eating celery like a fiend (picking up). My friend schedules. It was about judging and blaming.
stopped hanging out in bars (letting go) AND started Fortunately, both of these suffering people agreed
attending AA meetings (picking up). to enter into a community of support. A few months
Whether you are sharing your step five or you are later, they popped back in for another visit. This one
one of the honored ones who listens to them, I have was really different! Gone was all judgment and
an idea of something that I hope we will seriously blame on the part of the wife toward the husband;
“let go” and never “pick up.” As we grow up, our her focus had shifted. Tears ran down her cheeks as
self‐awareness increases. (I’m not talking about self‐ she judged, blamed, and shamed herself. She had
focus or selfishness or self‐absorption; I’m talking forgotten all about his shoes and schedules. All she
could focus on was her sin! Here’s what I told her.
107
Judging, blaming and shaming is not helpful in “What is this green stuff?” Pete asked. He asked
healing. No one ever got “better” from a tongue like a newlywed husband, with a scrunched up face
lashing, whether you’re lashing out at yourself or and a tone that could only be described as disgust.
someone else. All that gets you is more pain. “What green stuff?” I ask defensively. Gee Whiz, I
Let’s set aside all this blaming. Let it go. just baked this guy a pie from scratch. What does he
expect?
Thought for today: … If any one of you is without sin, “This stuff.” He spears it and puts it under my
let him be the first to throw a stone at her. John 8:7 nose with disdain. You would have thought he found
NIV a fly or finger tip!
“It’s apple peel! Get it? Apple pie, apples, apple
Thought for tomorrow: Jesus told a story in John 8 peel!” That should clear up his confusion.
about a woman caught in adultery. Masterfully, he Then he does a very bad thing. He laughs. This is
neither minimized her sin nor shamed her. The law no chuckle, this is a laugh until you fall out of your
said that if two people are caught in adultery, their chair guffaw. This is the kind of laugh I’ve heard and
punishment should be stoning—the community usually love, when something is really hilarious and
would throw stones at them—until they died. As he’s thoroughly enjoying himself.
you read John 8, notice what Jesus does. He How was I supposed to know apples were peeled
reluctantly answers their demand for judgment with before placing in a pie shell? An experienced cook,
one condition. “All right, but let the one who has Pete’s mom never considered telling me to peel the
never sinned throw the first stone!” The scriptures apples—that would be a rookie mistake, a mistake
go on to say that beginning with the oldest, all the she hadn’t even considered making in 20 years or so!
accusers slipped away without casting a single stone. After pouting for a few days, I learned from this
That is the absence of judgment that can spring from rookie faux pas. Today my family swears I make the
humility birthed as a result of self‐awareness. But best apple pie in the world. But it has been an
Jesus doesn’t end the confrontation with a feel‐good acquired skill.
backing away from blaming. “Go and sin no more.” So I encouraged my rookie listener of step five and
Sin matters. Jesus says we need to stop it. But he I want to encourage you as well: rookies make
says it without judging, blaming, or shaming. Let’s mistakes. I could have decided to give up on pie
join him in this, shall we? making. It would have been easy to turn the reins
back over to the expert and bring veggie trays to all
May 30 family functions. I chose to humble myself and keep
plugging. I commend this to you: keep learning.
Scripture Reading for today: Numbers 8 – 10 Don’t stop because of some grand delusion of
perfection. Learn from errors today, and someday
“I am not up to this. I can’t believe he asked me to you may be a person who can guide others gently. I
listen to his fifth step. I thought it would be a good have a note in my well‐worn cookbook to tell my
experience, I didn’t know listening to all daughter and future daughters‐in‐law how to make
this….darkness…would feel so….bad.” Rookie. That’s the perfect McBean apple pie. Long ago I penciled in
what he called himself after his first stab at listening the peeling instruction. I was afraid I would forget
to someone share their step five. Although he had what rookies need to know.
been through this step himself, he had never been
“another human being” before. He’s correct. He is a Thought for today: Listen carefully to my words, let
rookie. this be the consolation you give me. Job 21:2 NIV
I remember the first time I tried to make a
homemade apple pie. A newlywed, I realized that my Thought for tomorrow: Sometimes all it takes to
beloved loved apple pies. I got his favorite apple pie turn a life around is the presence of a good listener.
recipe from his mother (an experienced, excellent
cook) and went to work. May 31

108
Scripture Reading for today: Numbers 11 and 12— Scripture Reading for today: Numbers 13 and
read it carefully. Nehemiah 1 and 2

I read an interesting article in the paper this What do you think it means to be “entirely ready”
morning. It was about complaining. A pastor decided to have God remove our defects of character? A
that complaining, sarcasm, and gossiping were all timid knock on my office door introduced me to a
things that his congregation should “let go.” He had young woman who knows what it means to be
a bunch of arm bands made, and asked his “entirely ready.” It’s been several years since she
congregation to wear them as reminders to stop escaped a family system riddled with substance
complaining. abuse, physical abuse, and neglect. In the beginning
A psychologist commentated on this practice by it was hard. She missed her family, even with its
saying that some people solve problems by messy ways. She left to save herself, but she
complaining. In fact, she has written a book about sometimes wondered why.
the value of complaining. She believes that Then she met the man of her dreams. Instantly she
complaining can be a positive step toward problem felt a cosmic connection and “just knew” that he was
solving. the one for her. Such assurance in her newfound
In today’s recommended reading, complaining love emboldened her, and she joyfully accepted his
abounds, and it looks very unattractive. In chapter suggestion to move in together at her place. It made
12, God gets really tensed up when Miriam and such perfect sense. They’d save more money and
Aaron criticize Moses. At least in this one instance, would marry eventually. No rush, really, after all, he
complaining is a definite no‐no. Interesting. was her destiny.
Although the complaining is annoying and petty, I Until she got pregnant. Then he split. She was
particularly love what we learn about Moses in this heartbroken but soon rallied. He was just shocked,
story. Now Moses was very humble – more humble she reasoned, and needed some time to sort things
than any other person on earth (v. 3). In this out. Even the vicious rumors carried to her door step
recovery journey, none of us can go too far off track, by supposed friends did not deter her. She deduced
if we will humble ourselves. that they were probably jealous of a love so true.
Humility helps us stay teachable. It makes us hard She told them, “If you only knew how he treats me
to offend. It makes us less likely to be judgmental of when we’re alone; you’d know how much he loves
others. In any and every situation, we can eagerly me!”
expect to learn something new. It makes us more She continued to be entirely ready to accept his
enjoyable to be around. We’re leaving the fifth step lame excuses and erratic behavior. Months passed.
and heading toward step six—a step that’s going to She waited patiently for her destiny. When the baby
require a humble spirit. arrived, he got a big kick out of pointing out his
newborn son to family and friends. She smiled with
Thought for today: God blesses those who…realize delight and thought, “I was right!”
their need for him. Matthew 5:3 NLT He forgot to pick them up from the hospital, and
her humiliation knew no limit. After calling a friend
Thought for tomorrow: I hope that step five has to rescue her and the baby, she walked into the
been a blessing to you. My prayer is that you apartment, only to find her destiny in the company
continue to draw nearer to God and receive His of another damsel. When the dust cleared and all
promises with open arms. the company fled, she confronted him. She’d never
done this before and was shocked when he smacked
STEP 6 We were entirely ready to have God her hard across the face, almost causing her to drop
remove all these defects of character. their son.
Now she tells me that it was at that moment she
June 1 realized that she may have left the abusive home she
grew up in only to recreate it with this man. She
wants to know what I might suggest that she do. She
109
doesn’t want to end up like her mother. She reports is in the business of transformation. He can, and He
that she is perfectly open to any ideas I might offer will. It would be a sight to behold if all of us were as
her—except one. She cannot live without this man. ready to have God do His thing as this young lady
She is “entirely ready” to do anything it takes to help was to have the man of her dreams. Numbers 13 is
him understand that she is the one for him. It would such a blessing! Notice that God sends scouts to
be an added bonus if he would stop reminding her explore a land he’s already promised to give them!
so much of her own father. They miss that key piece of information, and instead
I tell her, sadly, that I am fresh out of ideas. It’s the go and explore this land for the purpose of deciding
truth; I am. What I can say, and I doubt she will hear, whether they can conquer its inhabitants and win
is that being “entirely ready” to have her defects of the land by force. Only Caleb sees clearly that they
character removed by God is the ONLY way she will haven’t been called to conquer the land, merely to
find herself in a position to receive God’s big dreams step when God speaks. A key ingredient required to
for her. Independently of God, this mighty spiritual get “entirely ready” is learning how to listen closely
act of restoration cannot occur. Unfortunately, to what God is really saying. Don’t miss the blessing
studies and statistics confirm the sad truth that in step six. God isn’t asking us to tackle our defects
many of us re‐create our unhealthy childhood homes of character by force and remove them from our
in spite of our best intentions to do otherwise. hearts; He’s simply asking if we’re ready for Him to
She shakes her head in confusion and says that she remove them. “Let’s go at once…we can certainly
just doesn’t get it. She doesn’t know how to be conquer it!” Numbers 13:30 NLT This is a viable
“entirely ready.” I assure her that indeed, being option for those who understand God can and will
“entirely ready” is one of the things she does best. I and who are ready—entirely ready—to step
point out her readiness to accept this man as her accordingly.
savior. In so doing, she willingly submits herself to
him. Thus far, this young woman has spent a year June 2
being “entirely ready” to live any way this man
dictates. “Entirely ready” involves trust. And Scripture Reading for today: Numbers 14; Nehemiah
although she’s never chosen to be “entirely ready to 3 and 4
have God…” she certainly has been “entirely ready.”
“What am I ‘entirely ready’ for?” She asks. Be careful about how you define “entirely ready.”
“Thus far, it seems as if you’ve been ‘entirely In Numbers 14, the Israelites hear about the
ready’ to live with your hurts, habits, and hang‐ups. consequences that God has chosen to mete out as a
You’re ‘entirely ready’ to live with your defects of result of their sin. They don’t like what they hear and
character. You’re ‘entirely ready’ to believe that your suddenly, they’re “entirely ready” to enter the land
destiny is set, and transformation is not possible. God promised them (remember, this was the very
You’re ‘entirely ready’ to believe that it is reasonable land they pitched a fit about entering in chapter 13).
to entrust your destiny to another person, but not to “Let’s go,” they said. “We realize that we have
God.“ sinned, but now we are ready to enter the land the
She left pretty discouraged. But she could not offer Lord has promised us.”
one word of disagreement. You know, it just doesn’t work that way. Getting
caught in wrongdoing isn’t automatically erased by
Thought for today: “Let’s go at once…we can trying to go back and rectify the wrong. Sure, they
certainly conquer it!” Numbers 13:30 NLT admitted they were wrong (step five), which was
good. But they weren’t prepared to actually repent.
Thought for tomorrow: My friend is onto some They just wanted to make their consequences go
measure of the truth. On her own, independently of away. That’s not quite the same thing, is it?
God, she really doesn’t have much choice but to This step is a paradox. It is passive, in that we are
accept the destiny set before her. Transformation preparing to ask God to remove our defects of
isn’t possible by self‐effort and well‐wishing. character; it is powerful, because willingness
Transformation is a God thing. Don’t miss that: God compels us to act. Apart from God, we can do
110
nothing. We can be sincere, passionate, and wisdom, they missed out on the privilege of learning
purposeful. But on our own, independent of God, we from one who could have been a tremendous life
are incapable of self‐transformation. Only God coach. If we skip step six we may miss out on our
transforms. Only God saves. This step is asking us to best selves, and so will those who love us.
believe that without God’s help, we can do nothing. If you’re thinking about skipping over this step and
And it is challenging us with an invitation to accept rushing ahead, I hope you’ll reconsider.
the help only God can provide.
Thought for today: Investigate my life, O God, find
Thought for today: The Lord will fight for you; you out everything about me; cross‐examine and test me,
need only to be still. Exodus 14:14 NIV get a clear picture of what I’m about; see for yourself
whether I’ve done anything wrong—then guide me
Thought for tomorrow: How about you? Are you on the road to eternal life. Psalm 139:23–24 The
ready to have God do for you what you cannot do Message
for yourself?
Thought for tomorrow: I’m not too keen on the idea
June 3 of someone—even God—testing me, examining me,
poking and prodding into the recesses of my
Scripture Reading for today: Numbers 14 and 15; character day in and day out. I’d feel like a bug under
Nehemiah 5 a microscope. But when I read Psalm 139 and I
realize that this kind of evaluation is for a purpose,
Seriously looking at all our defects of character can then I’m cool with it. God isn’t testing us with the
be overwhelming. It’s enough to make you want to hopes of chastising, blaming, and shaming. God
run for the hills! So I want to give you a strong word desires for us to submit to this process for the
of encouragement, and I pray it will be the kind of purpose of preparation. So I say: Have at it!
tonic that makes you willing to stand firm and
continue on the path of recovery. June 4
I believe that as we age, God intends for us to
grow. We may get wrinkled and our joints may make Scripture Reading for today: Numbers 16; Nehemiah
funny noises, but we can also get wiser. I think God 6 and 7
builds within us the capacity to gain wisdom and
understanding for a reason. I don’t believe this is for One of my exercise video gurus likes to challenge
the purpose of us all becoming a bunch of smarty me through my television screen. He says things like,
pants, but so that our experiences can benefit “Hey, we’re here for you! We’re in this together! If
others. Scripture indicates that’s how it can work; one of us falls behind, it hurts the whole team!” I’ve
we are students of life who become coaches for never figured out exactly how my exercise coach can
those who are following along behind us. determine whether I’m helping or hurting the team
If we aren’t willing to be brutally honest with via DVD, but I do know that at least in principle, he’s
ourselves, we may miss this precious benefit of right.
aging. Without being willing to have God remove our In Numbers 16, one guy conspires with two others,
character defects, we could find ourselves old but and ultimately their rebellion causes the death of
unwise. We may be willing but ill‐equipped to carry 14,700 innocent people. This didn’t happen
God’s message of hope to hurting people. capriciously. What we learn is that one bad apple
Recently I spent time with a family whose aging can spoil a whole bunch of other apples. “But the
parent was NOT coping well with the wrinkling and very next morning the whole community of Israel
crinkling process. It was sad. The same character began muttering again against Moses and Aaron...”
defects that had been obvious in this person’s prime And thus, a plague was birthed.
seemed magnified in old age. The children and So if you’re okay dragging your defects of
grandchildren not only had to deal with the character around behind you like a ball and chain, I
consequences of an aging family member with little want you to know that I am definitely not okay with
111
it! Why? Because you might be an apple that’s making the list of things we need to be willing and
hanging out near me in the same barrel! You might entirely ready to ask God to remove!
be rubbing up next to my husband, my kids, or my A friend of mine was sharing her particular defect
community. You might be hanging out with a future of character with me, and I thought it might be
child in‐law (whose name I may not know, but for helpful to share with you. Because she grew up in a
whom I have been praying for since the births of family that constantly criticized and belittled her, she
each of my children). You may be hanging out with grew up defensive and angry. She just always had to
my brothers or their wives, my nieces and nephews, be right. For her, there was no higher value than
my parents, or my mother‐in‐law. You might be being right. She decided that years of always being
hanging out in my church or at my kid’s school. You wrong could only be counterbalanced by years of
may even be bagging my groceries. You might be always being right. Consequently, my friend became
near my friends or my friends’ kids. a real pain in the neck. No one wanted to hang out
What you and I choose to do with our defects with her. Oh, she got what she wanted; she was right
matters. It matters to our families, friends, co‐ all the time, and everyone knew it. But what she lost
workers, and even our enemies. We need to take was the opportunity for meaningful relationships.
this into consideration as we make this very big What was her defect of character? She came to
decision. believe that this compulsion to be right all the time
was wrong—a shortcoming in her life. This was a
Thought for today: “…what does the Lord your God huge admission, because it was also the coat of
require of you? He requires you to fear him, to live armor she used to shield her wounded spirit; it
according to his will, to love and worship him with all defined her as valuable. I love how she accepted
your heart and soul, and to obey the Lord’s responsibility for her part without getting distracted
commands and laws that I am giving you today for by the failings of others. I particularly appreciated
your own good.” Deuteronomy 10:12‐13 NLT how powerless she felt over this compulsion to be
perfect. I was impressed by her persistence as she
Thought for tomorrow: God requires stuff of us, not asked God to remove this character flaw, and how
to be a “big old bad dictator,” but so that things will entirely ready she was for Him to do so. If you met
go well with us, with our families, in our my friend today, you would never think she was
communities, and in future generations. Did you once a person others avoided. Allowing God to
know that who you are could make such a huge remove her propensity to be right left a space as big
difference in our world? as Texas, which God filled with a very charming gift
of being real.
June 5
Thought for today: Humble yourselves before the
Scripture Reading for today: Skim Numbers 17, 18, Lord, and he will lift you up. James 4:10 NIV
and 19 God decided to give us life through the word of
truth so we might be the most important of all the
Character defects are those undesirable parts of things he made. James 1:18 NCV
ourselves that must be removed if we are going to
become our real, God‐created selves. They are our Thought for tomorrow: The most important thing
faults, weaknesses, shortcomings, failings, God made on planet earth was each of us. He’s got
limitations, manipulations, obsolete survival skills— big plans for us. Once we understand that we have
the parts of us that make us cringe with intrinsic value based on who God is, we will be free
embarrassment and shame. If we are to grow into to let go of all those things we cling to, hoping that
our potential, we must be willing to acknowledge they will give us value because of what we do.
each of these limitations (steps four and five help us Sometimes our defects of character are tricky to
do this) and consciously choose to ask God to discern, because they come disguised as things that
remove them. Anything that holds us back from we think actually add value to who we are.
living large and loving others has potential for
112
June 6 Moses for years. I do not presume to have a clue as
to the mysterious ways of God in this story. What
Scripture Reading for today: Numbers 20; Nehemiah I’m currently taking from this account leads me to
8 and 9 take seriously the charge set before me in step six.
I’ve got defects of character. All my efforts to “do
Sometimes our defects of character are tricky and good” do not “cover over” my limitations. It’s not
disguised. They show up as false beliefs, bad okay to get it mostly right and to think I can ignore
attitudes, and other subtle barriers to becoming all the areas in my life that reveal a lack of trust in God.
that we were created to be. Consider today’s Defects of character are serious business.
reading. If you’ve been following along with the
reading, you have no doubt realized that Moses led a June 7
whiney bunch of followers on a circuitous desert
pilgrimage destined for the Promised Land. Every Scripture Reading for today: Numbers 21,22, 23, 24
time he turned around, Moses was forced to fall on
his face before God in an attempt to save their sorry What characters we discover in the scripture for
souls. These rebellious, complaining followers were a today! Reading and re‐reading this saga brings all
thorn in his side. Could you blame Moses for getting sorts of life lessons to my mind. But for today, focus
annoyed? on this one thing: God’s purpose prevails.
In Numbers 20, Moses gets fed up. Again he has to Balaam was a great magician (Joshua 13:22) and
run to God to rescue his wayward flock. God evidently his community thought he had great
acquiesces and gives Moses one command, “As the power. Magic isn’t something that desperately
people watch, speak to the rock over there, and it devoted followers of God are supposed to mess
will pour out its water.” with. Although from a cultural perspective Balaam
So, the scripture says, Moses did as he was told. had influence and power, from God’s perspective he
Almost. “He took the staff from the place where it was in dire need of character renovation.
was kept before the Lord. Then he and Aaron In fact, it’s laugh‐out‐loud funny that God
summoned the people to come and gather at the instructed Balaam through a TALKING DONKEY!
rock. So far, Moses is right on track. “Listen, you Seriously, I can’t make this stuff up! Isn’t that a
rebels!” he shouted. “Must we bring you water from hoot? In the world’s eyes, this guy was clever, but
this rock?” Then Moses raised his hand and struck God used a lowly donkey to set Balaam straight.
the rock twice with the staff, and water gushed out. I find great hope in this story. First, I am
So the entire community and their livestock drank encouraged that even a donkey—a stubborn and
their fill.” lowly creature—can be used by God. Second, even a
The chapter goes on to say that Moses and Aaron sorcerer like Balaam, who is disobedient and self‐
are disciplined by God for their lack of trust, and, important, can see the light and obey God.
after all those years, they are not allowed to enter I’m a person who is well aware of my defects. I’m
the Promised Land. Huh? Moses shouted rather than even aware that I’m often unaware of my character
spoke, and he struck instead of waiting for the flaws. So it thrills me to my very core to know that
waters to flow. Does that seem like a shortcoming God’s purposes are far more “prevailing” than even
worthy of banishment from the Promised Land? my shortcomings.
Obviously the answer is yes. But why? Here’s the other part of this story that I absolutely
love. As far as we can tell, neither the donkey nor
Thought for today: If any of you lacks wisdom, he Balaam rose early each morning and acknowledged
should ask God, who gives generously to all without God. Balaam readily admitted his powerlessness, but
finding fault, and it will be given to him. James 1:5 we have no indication that he was a man who gave
NIV much thought one way or the other regarding God.
So if we believe, if we acknowledge, if we trust, if we
Thought for tomorrow: I’ve pondered and prayed inventory, if we admit, and if we prepare, imagine
for wisdom and understanding regarding the life of what God can do with us!
113
and even the outdated minutia of rules, regulations,
Thought for today: God decided to give us life and detailed offerings wear my enthusiasm down for
through the word of truth so we might be the most the task of reading. Or at least, that’s how it used to
important of all the things he made. James 1:18 NCV be for me when I tried to read the Bible.
I don’t know what’s happened, but over time, I’ve
Thought for tomorrow: I know—we just read James come to see it differently. Oh sure, there are the
1:18! Read it again. And remember: God is not a confusing and confounding parts; they are still
man, so he does not lie. He is not human, so he does present as I read along. And I admit I skim some of
not change his mind. Has he ever spoken and failed the lists. But I don’t skim too quickly, because a gem
to act? Has he ever promised and not carried it of insight is often tucked in the most obscure of
through? Listen, I received a command to bless; God verses.
has blessed, and I cannot reverse it! Numbers 23:19‐ Take for example the seduction of the Israelite
20 NLT God decided to give you life so that you men by the Moabite women. Did you miss that?
might be the most important of all the things He Does it seem so long, long ago that its relevance
made. That’s His decision. Frankly, you can choose to fades in comparison to your personal concerns like
spend your life living as if this is not true. You can paying for your child’s tuition or getting that car
live as if your life holds little value. You can act as if repair taken care of before the engine falls out? Is it
you have no purpose in life but to satisfy your own less confusing to skip the section where the Lord is
cravings. You can dream small and achieve little (sort described as having “fierce anger” against the
of like a donkey, whose grandest adventure on any Israelites?
given day is when he’s stubborn and recalcitrant and Do you cling to the hope‐filled verses of God’s
makes his rider work really hard to keep him on the mercy and grace? Rightly so! Do you appreciate the
path he’s supposed to travel). But from this day reality that Christ took on the burden of all our sins,
forward, I want you to make decisions like that in so that we might be freed from them? I’m sure you
the light of truth – God decided for you to have a life do! But during this devotional series, we are going to
of value, a life that would make a difference. Balaam pause and not run from the reality that God is not
didn’t fit this category of “less than” living. To quote only merciful but just. History has proven to us,
Austin Powers, Balaam thought “he was all that and whether it is a convenient truth or not, that God
a bag of potato chips too.” (You might want to cares about how we behave. God isn’t zoned out and
ponder which category you might fit into: under‐ or in denial about the peccadillos of mere mortals. He
over‐valuing yourself.) I suppose some of us, like doesn’t wear ruby‐red slippers (like Dorothy in The
Balaam, might have dreams for an important life—a Wizard of Oz) and just hope everything turns out all
life carried out on our terms—by our own definition right.
of what “important” means. But that’s not our God cares about our defects of character. They
decision, is it? stand as stumbling blocks that must be removed if
we are to live our lives according to our true God‐
June 8 created identity.

Scripture Reading for today: Numbers 25, 26; Thought for today: He himself bore our sins in his
Nehemiah 10 body on the tree, so that we might die to sins and
live for righteousness; by his wounds you have been
Have you ever set out to read the Bible from cover healed. 1 Peter 2:24 NIV
to cover? Did you succeed? I’ve done it a few times,
but I’ve tried to do it many, many more times than Thought for tomorrow: We love the truth that our
the few successes I can barely boast of. I get stuck in sins are forgiven; we hope that our wounds will be
some of those Old Testament books. I like the healed. But that’s not the only reason Jesus came.
stories, but sometimes the long list of genealogies, He came that we might live righteously. It’s time for
the hard‐to‐comprehend mysteries beyond my us to make a commitment to do our part: get ready.
limited cultural comprehension buried in the stories,
114
June 9 back‐stabbing. You must crave pure spiritual milk so
that you can grow into the fullness of your salvation.
Scripture Reading for today: Numbers 27, 28, 29 Cry out for this nourishment as a baby cries for milk,
now that you have had a taste of the Lord’s kindness.
Do you remember Joshua? He was the guy, along 1 Peter 1:23, 2:1‐3 NLT
with his buddy Caleb, who believed God’s promises.
In Numbers 13, scouts were sent to explore the Thought for tomorrow: Some days our problems
Promised Land, and most turned out to be ninnies. seem so large that they obscure the view of our
Scared witless, they forgot not only God’s promises. Keep looking; don’t give up.
instructions (to explore the land) but His promises
(to give them the land). June 10
Fear and anxiety can do that to us. It makes us
forgetful. We can forget who God is and what He’s Scripture Reading for today: Numbers 30; Nehemiah
up to. We grow forgetful of who we are and what 11 and 12
we’re created for. In all this confusion, it’s hard to
tease out our defects of character and separate The Bible is rich with instructions. Some very
them from our fears, worries, and generalized specific and culturally driven—like Numbers 30.
malaise. From our perspective, sometimes it takes serious
Sometimes we have a Joshua experience. We do “pausing to prepare” to take the scripture and apply
something really marvelous that delights the Lord, it to our daily living. One way I like to prepare is to
but it takes a long, long time before the fruit of that study the historical context of a passage. If I’m going
one decision ripens. Joshua and Caleb leaned into to try to grasp meaning for myself, it behooves me
their fears and spoke faith‐filled truths. But that to understand first the intended meaning of the
didn’t get them morphed into the Promised Land like passage to whom it was written. I might look in
something out of a movie scene. God’s blessing on some study guides, concordances, Bible dictionaries,
their obedience took time to unfold. In Numbers 27, etc. We are fortunate today because we have online
we see that blessing delivered. I wonder if you—like resources too. Then I ask myself the question: what
Joshua—have made a really great decision, but the principle can I extrapolate from this teaching that is
blessing is taking time to be delivered? applicable for my culture?
Today my son is awaiting a package. I think it I think the same principles apply when we have
contains a cool piece of sports apparel with the Red conversations about defects of character. Some
Sox label prominently displayed. He is driving me defects cross all cultures. For example, murder is
crazy tracking the package online and hoping for his wrong. It’s bad for society, and most cultures
gift sooner rather than later. He’s so impatient, he’s establish laws that are consistent with that belief.
begun to doubt the routing messages. He fears his My mother says that in her day, women who
precious shirt is lost. Aren’t we all like that? engaged in premarital sex were considered wanton
I want you to do me a favor. I want you to and very naughty. In my day, I’ve witnessed a real
remember one simple truth: you don’t have to figure shift in cultural mores regarding this practice. Some
out all the answers, you simply have to get ready believe that premarital sex is perfectly acceptable in
and willing for God to show you the way. Are you a monogamous, committed relationship. The
ready? younger generation tells me that they feel that
“friends with benefits” is perfectly normal; they find
Thought for today: For you have been born again. “committed” to be a limited perspective.
Your new life did not come from your earthly parents So is “character” relative? Does “defect” depend
because the life they gave you will end in death. But on one’s own personal code of conduct? What do
this new life will last forever because it comes from you think?
the eternal, living word of God…So get rid of all
malicious behavior and deceit. Don’t just pretend to Thought for today: The person who sins breaks
be good! Be done with hypocrisy and jealousy and God’s law. Yes, sin is living against God’s law. You
115
know that Christ came to take away sins and that persistent feelings of guilt (an “I did wrong” feeling
there is no sin in Christ. So anyone who lives in Christ of sometimes true, sometimes false guilt)
does not go on sinning. Anyone who goes on sinning shame (otherwise known as a feeling of “I am
has never really understood Christ and has never wrong” –a feeling of being broken, “less than”)
known him. Dear children, do not let anyone lead you inability to feel/numbness
the wrong way. Christ is all that is right. So to be like inability to deal appropriately with feelings
Christ a person must do what is right. 1 John 3:4‐ 7 fear of love, joy, commitment
(New Century Version) closed mind and/or heart
attraction to people, things, behaviors that cause
Thought for tomorrow: This is an important issue to problems
ponder. Our ability to understand the nature of need to be perfect
character defects is going to affect our capacity to need to fail
fulfill our commitment to working an effective step past abuse and/or present abusing
six. need to be a victim
selfish, self‐centered living
June 11 inability to feel empathy
need for chaos
Scripture Reading for today: Numbers 31 and 32; need for dysfunction
Nehemiah 13 limiting false beliefs about God, self and others
(your beliefs may seem normal to you, but have
Yesterday we ended our devotional with a others given you input that could mean that you
question: how does one decide what is and what is are wrong?)
not a defect of character? Lots of people have gone fear of intimacy
before us and explored this topic. Below is a list of failure to know, appreciate, and be true to our
possible shortcomings that others have identified as God‐created identity
commonly held character weaknesses. See if any
strike you as personal possibilities: Thought for today: Do your best to present yourself
unhealthy dependencies on people, to God as one approved, a workman who does not
circumstances, things, compulsions, or obsessions need to be ashamed and who correctly handles the
controlling and manipulating as a lifestyle word of truth. 2 Timothy 2:15 NIV
consistent feelings of desperation that drive our
choices Thought for tomorrow: Perhaps it would be helpful
debilitating fears if you took this list with your personal defect
anger issues “suspicions” to a dear, dear friend. And if you can
negative, limiting beliefs ask this without going postal based on their
worry as a lifestyle response, ask them: do you see this in me?
the need to understand
the need to blame June 12
waiting to be reasonably happy
the false belief that we aren’t responsible for Scripture Reading for today: Numbers 33 and John
ourselves 13
the false belief that we cannot take care of
ourselves We’re hitting the home stretch in Numbers. As this
self‐hatred book draws to a close, Moses recounts the history of
lack of trust the wilderness experience for a new generation.
inappropriately placed trust Before the next grand epic adventure begins, God
addictions (alcohol, drugs, shopping, over‐ causes the people to pause to prepare.
exercising, smoking, over‐eating…compulsions run I have found this true in my life too. Sometimes
wild) before God speaks and asks me to step, I find myself
116
looking back, remembering my past, thinking about Potential Problem: unhealthy dependencies on
who I am and how I have come to believe. During people, circumstances, things, etc. and/or
the next few devotionals, I’m going to encourage inappropriately placed trust
you to consider pausing to prepare as well. I’m going Think of all the whining we’ve read about in
to spend each day illustrating one common Numbers. Those guys were barely in the desert
character defect. Your part, should you choose to before they were ready to head back to captivity.
accept it, is to think: could this be a shortcoming in Instead of pausing to prepare, taking a deep breath,
me? and carefully recalling the true state of their lives,
In the gospel of John, chapter 13, Jesus predicts they panicked. And in the panicking, they chose to
that one of the disciples is going to betray him. The depart from reality and run straight into fantasy.
disciples glanced around the room, wondering: who They began to creatively remember their lives in
is this guilty betrayer? Certainly the disciples didn’t Egypt. They talked themselves into believing that
nod in silent recognition. They didn’t glance at each captivity hadn’t been “that bad.” When faced with a
other, muttering softly, “It has to be Judas.” But did challenging situation, the Israelites wanted
Judas see himself as disloyal? Did the other disciples inappropriately to trust their captors rather than to
ask themselves: could it be me? trust their God.
As we’re going through the list of potential When we have unhealthy dependencies on any
problems that any one of us might suffer from, I pray person, place, or thing, we’ve run to la‐la land too.
that we will all be aware that we have this in Sometimes we do all sorts of mental gymnastics
common with the disciples: it is sometimes hard to trying to convince ourselves that our object of
see ourselves and others accurately. obsession is worthy of so much power and trust. This
causes us a lot of anxiety, and sometimes we even
Thought for today: No temptation has seized you start acting and sounding a little kooky. We put
except what is common to man. And God is faithful, ourselves in terrible situations when we trust in
he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can anything that is untrustworthy.
bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide This reminds me of a woman I know who is very
a way out so that you can stand up under it. 1 angry with her family because they won’t accept her
Corinthians 10:13 NIV new husband. In fact, her mother is so distraught,
she refuses to have any contact with her until she is
Thought for tomorrow: I get nervous sometimes no longer involved with this man. Wow. Does that
when I think about the extent of my hurts, habits sound harsh to you?
and hang‐ups. I used to think that one day I’d be Let me tell you what this guy did. This newlywed
completely “renovated” and could cease the pair has a long and stormy history that includes
uncomfortable practices of inventories, lists of harm abuse, fraud, cheating, lying, stealing, etc. Did I
done, and making amends. I know that was silly and mention that the bride found out that she had
naïve, but it’s the truth! But greater than my natural contracted HIV from this man and still proceeded
reluctance to be honest about my shortcomings is with the wedding march? This woman, who has
the encouragement I receive from looking back. I can invested so much time and effort in this relationship
remember where I’ve been and how far I’ve come. (I guess you could say she gave her life for him)
That’s seriously cool. It motivates me to push simply cannot NOT depend on this man. She feels
through my anxieties. I want to be more than just she must have him in her life. She believes he will
okay. I want the abundant life God has for me. I change. So, in full knowledge of all the past, she
desire to be entirely ready for the next step! chooses to marry him. This is what we might call an
unhealthy dependency.
June 13 I know a guy who has had so much interpersonal
turmoil and betrayal that he’s decided to love things
Scripture Reading for today: Numbers 34, 35, and and use people. He refuses to depend on anybody
36 for anything. He’s got a wall of protection around his
heart so high and deep it makes the Great Wall of
117
China project look like child’s play. He has an it with you, but trust me, it is desperate. Imagine
unhealthy dependency on self. He’s figured out that the worst seven things that could happen to your
people sometimes disappoint, but he hasn’t quite family, multiply that by two, and you will get a
gotten hold of the fact that he’s “people” too. glimpse into the desperation this family is currently
Let’s not miss the point. We were created to experiencing.
depend on each other, love each other, and care for Desperation takes our breath away. It leaves us
one another, but we were never supposed to think feeling as if there are no solutions. It is often
that people, places, or things could substitute for the accompanied by its little friends—helplessness and
source of all our true security—God himself. We hopelessness. It’s a dark night of the soul that lasts
were created to depend on Him to save, guide, for what seems like eternity.
nurture, restore, renew, counsel, convict, and I felt desperate the first time I was exposed to
forgive us. Sometimes God even uses other humans, scuba diving. I’m at best an adequate swimmer. I’m
life events, etc. to serve as emissaries of his saving, not confused about this. I give myself almost zero
guiding, nurturing, restoring, renewing, counseling, chance of surviving a crisis in water. If something
convicting, and forgiving. But we must learn to hold goes wrong, I quickly move from fun in the water to
lightly and gently to these fleshy fleshly things, desperate and drowning. Anyway, once we were on
trusting that God is the source and provider of all the vacation and my dad, who is an awesome swimmer,
things we truly need. brought his scuba diving gear along and let us use it
in the hotel pool.
Thought for today: So don’t be misled, my dear I thought it would be fun. But once the heavy
brothers and sisters. Whatever is good and perfect tanks were strapped on my back, and the regulator
comes to us from God above, who created all the was firmly in my mouth, I started having those first
heaven’s lights. James 1:16‐17 NLT little tinglings of desperation. I ignored them initially,
but as I paddled to the deep end of the pool, the first
Thought for tomorrow: My friend with the wayward indication of “wrong” manifested. These tanks were
husband and the distraught mother has forgotten for my dad, and I was considerably smaller. So as I
that God has plenty to say about the qualifications dove down, the tanks moved down too. Suddenly I
and requirements of husbanding, and this dude found myself standing on my head at the bottom of
failed the test. She’s depending and trusting in the the pool. Those tanks were acting like a weight, and I
wrong person. My friend who lives behind the brick couldn’t move. I did hear a funny muffled noise, and
wall of resentment and bitterness forgot that he was as I cranked my neck in an awkward position to look
called to love God and others—not to live a life of up, I could see my three brothers and my dad
isolated self‐protection. This friend has taken too far floating on the surface, watching this debacle and
the principle that people aren’t to be unhealthily laughing hysterically. I however, was in full panic
depended upon and has forgotten that healthy mode. I was sure death was eminent.
dependence is part of being a follower of Christ. Desperation does that. I quickly forgot I was in a
Anytime our behaving is incongruent with our pool and that my dad was perfectly capable of
believing, we need to sniff around for a character swimming down and whisking me up to the surface
defect. in a millisecond. Desperate people don’t think
clearly. They just get desperate, flail around, and
June 14 forget much of what they knew seconds before their
encounter with desperation.
Scripture Reading for today: Esther 1; James 1;
Psalm 35 Thought for today: If you need wisdom, ask our
generous God, and he will give it to you. He will not
Potential Problem: desperation rebuke you for asking. But when you ask him, be sure
The psalmist was definitely desperate when he that your faith is in God alone. Do not waver, for a
penned this psalm! This week I listened as a family person with divided loyalty is as unsettled as a wave
recounted a long litany of desperation. I can’t share
118
of the sea that is blown and tossed by the wind. hatching sinful plots. What? How can that be? Well,
James 1:5‐6 NLT it is controlling, manipulative, selfish, and self‐
centered. We each have our own life. We have the
Thought for tomorrow: My dad scooped down and responsibility to choose our big dreams, and others
hauled me up without rebuke (okay, they all must be afforded the same privilege.
continued to laugh) but no rebuke. God wants to do We may presume that we know what others’ lives
that with us, too. Desperation is only a shortcoming should look like. And perhaps it appears that we
if it results in flailing around, trusting in the wrong really do. But we certainly don’t know what God has
people or things, or developing unhealthy in mind. What if our controlling manipulations work?
dependencies to quiet our panic. If we will trust God, Are we perhaps interrupting the plans of God? We
then desperation can be a blessing. At the first may keep our kid out of juvie, we may hire enough
tingling of despair, we can pause to prepare. We can lawyers so that licenses aren’t revoked and prison
ask our generous God, and He will give us the time is averted—but to what end? Sometimes the
wisdom we need. But remember, our faith must be only way we learn is through the school of hard
in God alone. knocks. What if consequences brought to bear early
in life are the very things that will refine a person
June 15 and help them to become their true God‐created
identity? Did you ever think of that?
Scripture Reading for today: Esther 2; James 2; I am the mother of three children; I’ve been there
Psalm 36 and done this. I’ve done it wrong, and I’m trying to
learn how to do it differently. Why? Because I have
Potential Problem: a controlling and manipulative come to believe that even successful manipulation is
style of relating to others; selfish and self‐centered a poor and inadequate imitation of choosing faith. A
living. faith choice might still require us to lie awake
They lie awake at night, hatching sinful plots. Their vigilantly and pray. A faith choice absolutely requires
actions are never good. They make no attempt to that we learn how to address problems and concerns
turn from evil. Psalm 36:4 NLT with our children (and others we love). But we must
I don’t believe that most of us deliberately, learn how to do such things absent manipulating,
consciously, intentionally “lie awake at night controlling, selfish, and self‐centered living.
hatching sinful plots.” I suspect if most of us realized If we’re on step six, than we’ve already committed
our actions were “never good,” most of us would try to step three. That means that to live as if we are
to change. Nor do I think that the average Joe has God (as opposed to living so that we might become
any desire to be near evil, much less think they need imitators of Christ) is evil.
to turn from it.
I suppose that’s why this character defect is such Thought for today: This is what the Lord says: “Don’t
an important one to consider. let the wise boast in their wisdom, or the powerful
What keeps you awake at night? Are you worried boast in their power, or the rich boast in their riches.
about your children, your spouse, your finances, But those who wish to boast should boast in this
your love life, your job, etc.? Are you lying in your alone: that they truly know me and understand that I
bed, fretting about what others may or may not be am the Lord who demonstrates unfailing love and
up to, figuring and calculating how you’re going to who brings justice and righteousness to the earth,
try to convince “them” to do what you believe is in and that I delight in these things. I, the Lord, have
their best interest? I can almost hear your response: spoken!” Jeremiah 9:23‐24 NLT
Isn’t that what all parents (spouses, employees…)
do? Well, no, it’s not. (It’s what we all consider Thought for tomorrow: I know how hard it is to stop
doing!) trying to fix problems. I like fixing things. But many
Here’s why. If we’re lying awake thinking of new of the problems that weigh us down aren’t ours to
ways to get our kids (or anyone) to live the life we fix. Here’s a hard truth: If others’ problems are
dream for them, we’re participating in evil. We’re keeping you up at night, is your desire to solve them
119
motivated by love? Or because you’re selfishly trying peaceful life, then that’s a character defect. I hope
to ease your own pain? Think long and hard about you’re entirely ready to let it go, because I can
this. assure you, you are wearing out the people that love
you. If you’re a person who is being worn down by
Sometimes it feels so good to be a hero, even if one who loves the darkness of confusion more than
just for a moment. But our greatest attempts to live the clarity of God’s light, be careful.
the super‐human life are pale and pitiful compared I’m not suggesting that you be unkind, but check
to the riches of God. your boundaries and make sure you’re not becoming
more concerned about “fixing” another person’s life
June 16 than they are concerned about having it fixed!
In hindsight, it would have been kinder for me to
Scripture Reading for today: Esther 3; James 3; have interrupted my friend’s soliloquy and gently
Psalm 37 inform her that I was on my way to work on
something that couldn’t wait. It was not kind of me
Potential Problem: Need for chaos and destruction to allow her to ramble on for an hour as if that was
I ran into her in the parking lot at the beginning of normal. I was not kind, helpful, or loving on this day.
what was going to become a long, hard day. As she No wonder it turned out to be such a long, hard one.
came rushing up, my heart did a little blip and I felt a
vague, sinking sensation. I had intended to run a Thought for today: Woe to those who call evil good
quick errand and rush home. I had a big project and and good evil, who put darkness for light and light
a short deadline which I was looking forward to for darkness, who put bitter for sweet and sweet for
achieving. Quelling this desire to rush off and bitter. Isaiah 5:20 NIV
achieve, I listened to a long drama of trauma unfold.
After I made my escape, I asked myself what was Thought for tomorrow: If we’re going to be entirely
up. I love people and their stories. I love a good ready, then we must be willing to accept the reality
interruption. I’ve been known to miss dinner, sleep, of our defects of character and be relentless in our
and even a good workout session for the privilege of pursuit of readiness.
listening to a story—even one fraught with suffering.
So why was I so bugged? Setting aside project, June 17
deadline, and the need to achieve, I cloistered
myself in my study and spent some serious time in Scripture Reading for today: Esther 4; James 4;
prayer. Many things were revealed to me that Psalm 38
resulted in a decent sized inventory (see step four).
One of the things that I came to realize was that my Potential Problem: Emotions run wild (fear, anger,
friend had moved from telling her story into the worry, guilt, shame)—either too much or too little
world of embracing chaos and destruction. emotion for the situation at hand—and an inability
That little blip and vague sinking sensation were to appropriately respond to those emotions (or lack
clues that I was being approached by a storm cloud, thereof).
not a woman in need of a listening ear. There’s a I spend an inordinate amount of time in my local
difference. Life is filled with opportunities to suffer. grocery store. I don’t know why, really, since I’m not
We’re not supposed to go looking for them, embrace known for my culinary prowess. Actually, now that I
them to the exclusion of everything else life has to think about it, this all makes perfect sense! Most of
offer, or even try to keep the chaos and destruction my time is spent people watching! (No wonder I
alive and well. My friend was doing just that. She never make it home with my completed grocery list!)
seemed to thrive on having a story that indicated During my people watching, I’ve seen a lot of kids
how crazy her life was. She had grown to love the have a lot of fits. Screaming, crying, kicking, gnashing
darkness. of teeth—all of it happens in the checkout line of any
If you find it easier to manage the chaos and local grocery on any given day. Since my children are
accept destruction as a way of life than to live a
120
older, I’ve come to relax and enjoy these that stuff happens in life and we respond to it
experiences—until yesterday. emotionally. However, it is a serious shortcoming
It was nap time and this little one was obviously not to know how to appropriately respond to our
tired. Unfortunately, her mom wasn’t paying emotions.
attention. In the produce section, she was rubbing
her eyes and trying to get out of the cart. At one Thought for today: What is causing the quarrels and
point, she was so close to toppling out of her seat fights among you? James 4:1 NLT
that I reached over and grasped her outstretched
arms, nudging her little legs back into the sitting Thought for tomorrow: Emotions spring unbidden
position (mom was off in the fruit section chatting from our inner selves. They’re the result of what
with a friend). By the time we made it to the cereal we’re thinking and believing in the midst of each
section, she was starting to whine and her mother situation. The lady with the tired baby responded in
shushed her in a distracted sort of way (no eye anger (who knows what else she was feeling before
contact). Frozen foods was a disaster; the toddler she erupted‐‐embarrassed, worried, afraid?). I was
was now in the kicking‐feet‐and‐flailing‐arms stage clearly embarrassed by my tike’s stealthy attempts
of a full‐blown fit. Mom kept her head averted and at turning the grocery store into a sporting event.
seemed to be really fascinated with the frozen Emotions happen. Sometimes hormones and
waffles. By checkout, this precious little girl was neurons and learned behaviors and all sorts of
writhing around and flinging anything she could factors play into our feelings. Emotions like anger,
reach out of the cart and onto the floor. And then it fear, worry, etc. are like the red warning lights on
happened. Her mother slapped her hard across the our cars’ dashboards. They’re God‐given and
face. intended to get our attention. I know that mom was
Silence. The child stared up at her mother with a tired and stressed, but her character is in serious
look of horror, mirroring the images on the rest of need of becoming “entirely ready to ask God”
the unwitting observers who had the misfortune of because what I witnessed yesterday has a name: it’s
being present in the store at this particular moment. called child abuse. If you too are a person who
“Shut up! I said shut up! You’re driving me crazy!” struggles with understanding how to deal with
Once I was in this same store with a toddler who emotions, recognize it for what it is: a learning
also caused quite a stir. I was hustling through the opportunity. Relationships are at stake here, people,
store basically grabbing two of everything. I placed a we need to get with the program and figure out
dozen eggs on the top of my bulging cart and then what’s going on. No doubt about it, part of that
got distracted by a friend who wanted to share a figuring should include a well‐worked step six.
great story. Without my noticing, my son opened the Read the rest of James 4 if you want to see one
carton and began to take one egg out at a time and perspective on that issue.
drop them to the floor. Then I began moving again,
and he continued dropping those eggs in slow, June 18
regular, intervals. I didn’t notice this strange feat
until check out. I was sooooo embarrassed. Try Scripture Reading for today: Esther 5; James 5;
telling a cashier that it’s quite possible that a dozen Psalm 39
eggs are scattered and broken from Aisle 11 all the
way to frozen foods. It’s hard to explain. Potential Problem: negative, limiting beliefs
So when I heard the smack, and the screaming including the belief that we aren’t responsible for
mom, I wondered: what caused this? Does she often ourselves and cannot take care of ourselves; false
do this or was this a freak occurrence? Is she beliefs about God, self, and others
embarrassed? Did she just lose her job? Are her One of the reasons I am so hard core in my
parenting skills sub‐par? Is she sleep deprived commitment to daily disciplines like scripture
herself? Did her husband just leave her? Did she just reading and study is because I’m such a goof when it
lose her charge cards or find out she had to pay for a comes to limiting beliefs. It’s true, I’ve acquired a lot
new transmission? I don’t know. What I do know is of bogus beliefs and stinking thinking, have jumped
121
to a myriad of bad assumptions, and drawn a host of been told about God. He is all loving, all knowing, all
cockeyed conclusions in my fifty‐plus years on planet powerful and more. He loved me enough to let his
earth. Some of these are so firmly entrenched that if Son, who never sinned, die for my wrongdoing and
I knew I was believing them, even I wouldn’t agree somehow consider it an even exchange. To me that
with myself! I suspect that’s one of the reasons that seems like trading twenty pesos for a bajillion
being “sort of” ready doesn’t cut it when it comes to American dollars, but I’m no finance major.
defects of character (particularly this sneaky one). Somehow in spite of all of that, I cannot seem to do
It’s so confusing because sometimes we BELIEVE that my part in a given day to minimize the behavior that
we BELIEVE a certain thing to be true, but our causes Him pain. I’m a rule breaker. I’ve been taught
actions reveal that in fact, we do not. Can you everything I need to know to “get in good” with God,
relate? Let’s listen in as someone writes about his but I still can’t seem to do it. I used to think I could
personal struggle with confused believing… get everything right for at least a day, and then build
“I hate going to sleep at nights, I always have. on that. Maybe I could put two perfect days
Don’t get me wrong, it’s not the sleep itself I hate, together, who knows? Once I accomplish that,
far from it. It’s the inevitable sleepless hours perhaps I can throw together a whole work week, or
immediately preceding the sleep that gets me any five‐day stretch. My calculations tell me,
torqued up. You see, the time spent lying in bed however, I have yet to put together a perfect
prior to sleep is really the only time all day I am minute. Thus, I am perpetually confronted with
really forced to take an in‐depth look at myself; the these things every night, between the hours of 11
only pure and unadulterated time to examine all of p.m. and 2 a.m.” (From the letter of a desperately
my imperfections. I wasn’t born this way, though; devoted follower of Christ who was feeling pretty
God does not do that to people. I grew up in church, desperate on the day he wrote in.)
just like a lot of kids do. Sunday morning Bible
studies, sermons, youth group, small groups—you Thought for today: Obviously, the writer is talking
name a church activity—I grew up going to it. It’s about confusing beliefs, some of which are
easy for a kid to conclude that religion is all about downright false. He knows that “getting in good”
following rules. Buddhists have the eightfold path. with God cannot be about doing everything right.
Hindus have the caste system. Jews have the Torah. After all, he believes all those other character traits
Christians probably have the longest list of do’s and He learned about God too—especially the whole
don’ts of all, though hardly any come from the Bible, Jesus story. But do you hear the suffering that occurs
based on what I’ve seen. A woman at church once when false beliefs unwittingly co‐mingle with truth?
told me dancing was a sin because of the sexuality of Whether little listening ears sometimes hear a story
the movement. Obviously, she’s never been down to and jump to the wrong conclusion or sometimes
the local assisted living home on line dancing day. we’re taught bad theology, all of us at one time or
Nothing will kill the overly intense sex drive of a another will find our beliefs a bit jumbled in our
teenager like gyrating old people. (Taking that heads. If left unchecked in a world of false beliefs,
information to its logical conclusion, dancing might my friend may soon find himself living in a world of
help you secure a place in heaven, but I digress.) compromised choices. His pain and suffering may
The heavy‐handed influence of this form of rule‐ escalate. He could even decide that his faith has
oriented religion forces people into two groups: rule more to do with rules than relationship, and that
followers and rule breakers. Some people believe would really be troubling.
breaking rules is considered “sin,” which, based on
what I’ve been taught at times, is a Christian term Thought for tomorrow: This is good, and pleases
for “making God love you a little bit less.” Enter my God our Savior, who wants all men to be saved and
sleepless nights. Once I’ve done everything possible come to a knowledge of the truth. 1 Timothy 2:3‐4
to avoid sleep; once I’ve read, played Xbox, watched NIV It’s normal to end of up with conflicting beliefs
TV, and the like, I get to lie in bed thinking about all as we journey through life; it’s awesome to know we
the things I’ve done during that day to make God have a God who doesn’t want to leave us in our
love me less. I am a rule follower. I believe what I’ve confusion. Are you “entirely ready” to let God have
122
his way with you? It is God who works in you to will never understand, nor are we supposed to try.
and to act according to his good purpose. Philippians Weighing the motives of the hearts of others isn’t
2:13 NIV really within our ability (much less our job
description); trying to figure out what God is up to in
June 19 each and every situation is simply not going to
happen; getting so smart that we understand every
Scripture Reading for today: Esther 6; John 1 and 2 little thing about every single verse in the Bible—I’m
working on that one—but I’ve stopped demanding
Potential Problem: the need to understand instant knowledge. The willingness to be “entirely
According to most experts, the gospel of John, ready” even in the face of limited understanding?
written by John the apostle, brother of James, was Priceless.
penned between A.D. 80 and 90. After years of
reflection, John records a perspective that is the Thought for today: Seek the Lord while he may be
most unique of the four gospels. This used to freak found; call on him while he is near. Let the wicked
me out. I thought all the gospels should “match.” forsake his way and the evil man his thoughts. Let
Any little confusion in timeline or tweaking of a him turn to the Lord, and he will have mercy on him,
story, and it sent me into an anxiety attack. and to our God, for he will freely pardon. “For my
On more than one occasion, I can remember thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your
lamenting to my husband (who didn’t seem at all ways my ways,” declares the Lord. “As the heavens
bothered by the serious lack of matching between are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher
this gospel and Matthew, Mark, and Luke), “I just than your ways and my thoughts higher than your
want to understand.” What can be wrong with that? thoughts.” Isaiah 55: 6‐9 NIV
It turns out that a lot can be wrong with the “need
to understand.” In fact, it can become a real Thought for tomorrow: I love the lyrics found in the
shortcoming. Our son Scott has run into this “need” music of Andrew Peterson. In one of his songs
recently, and I suspect he has an increased there’s a line…”afraid that I will find that His (God’s)
appreciation of the ability to “let it go.” As an intern love is no better than mine.” Fear not. God’s love is
with our Minister to Students, Scott has been far better than anything we’ve experienced in
facilitating a discussion on various world religions ourselves or others. That’s just one of many
with the youth group. He’s worked like a dog, mysteries that we quite possibly will never
studying and researching each religion. He worries understand. But here’s the deal: God gets it. You can
that he might misspeak, and in so doing, potentially trust Him with the stuff you have to let go. It’s my
misrepresent a faith experience that he’s only read prayer today that whatever you’ve spent too much
about. time trying to understand (why he doesn’t love you
So he was quick to report in on one particular anymore, why she cheated on you, why this
evening when one of the youth “grilled” him happened or that didn’t, etc.), you will be “entirely
extensively about a particular religious group. (As a ready” to let God remove that need to understand.
former youth teacher, I am enjoying watching my (Don’t miss tomorrow’s devotional—it’s on that
son experience youth ministry from the other side of pesky need to blame.)
the lectern.) Whether right or wrong, there was
some thought given to this question: was this a case June 20
of the “need to understand” gone astray? Was this
kid interested in the topic, hoping for clarification, or Scripture Reading for today: Esther 7; John 3 and 4
just having a bit too much fun needling the new guy?
Sometimes the “need to understand” can become Potential Problem: The need to blame
a thinly veiled attempt to play God. Other times it Before you read ahead in John, glance back at John
can be an excuse for not stepping as God speaks in 2. Fascinating. Jesus’ mother is at a wedding, and
the areas that we DO understand. Lots of times it’s they run out of wine. This is a huge wedding blunder,
simply a waste of time. There are things that we can and Mary walks right up to Jesus and presents the
123
problem to him (“They have no more wine.”). Jesus was aware that his disciples were
Obviously, she expected him to solve this problem. complaining, so he said to them, “Does this offend
Jesus responds, “Dear woman, that’s not our you?...The spirit alone gives eternal life. Human
problem, my time has not yet come.” effort accomplishes nothing. And the very words I
“But his mother told the servants, ‘Do whatever he have spoken to you are spirit and life. But some of
tells you’.” And the rest of the story, as they say, is you do not believe me.” (For Jesus knew from the
history. Jesus does what his mom requests. beginning which ones didn’t believe, and he knew
Neither party blamed the other. Jesus didn’t blame who would betray him.) Then he said, “That is why I
his mother for not sticking with the grand plan; Mary said that people can’t come to me unless the Father
didn’t blame Jesus for reminding her that his mission gives them to me.”
was still in the covert stage. They didn’t ruin a At this point many of his disciples turned away and
perfectly good wedding with the defective need to deserted him.
blame. It says afterwards that they spent a few days
together. No one withdrew into their corners to lick Thought for today: None of this is easy. Thinking
their wounds. A problem was stated; a solution was about our defects is not easy. Coming to see that all
found. our years of failed self‐effort were destined to be a
Has the “need to blame” been a problem in your waste of time is not easy. Trusting God to do for us
life? Think about it. Take a few minutes to pray what we haven’t been able to do for ourselves is not
about this one. easy. And the truth is that many will turn away. I
hope it won’t be you.
Thought for today: But whoever catches a glimpse of Then Jesus turned to the Twelve and asked, “Are
the revealed counsel of God‐ the free life!—even out you also going to leave?”
of the corner of his eye, and sticks with it, is no Simon Peter replied, “Lord, to whom would we go?
distracted scatterbrain but a man or woman of You have the words that give eternal life. We believe,
action. That person will find delight and affirmation and we know you are the Holy One of God.”
in the action. Anyone who sets himself up as And within a few chapters we’ll discover that
“religious” by talking a good game is self‐deceived. Peter’s best intentions, his big statements of faith,
This kind of religion is hot air and only hot air. James his self‐confidence, and even his love for the Lord
1: 25‐26 The Message were not enough to keep him from denying Jesus.
Still, Jesus restores him. He raises him up. Peter
Thought for tomorrow: Is there any place for blame becomes one of the key leaders in the Christian
in the midst of a free life filled with delight and church. That’s God, doing for us what we can’t do for
affirmation in action? ourselves.

June 21 Thought for tomorrow: It is God who works in you to
will and to act according to his good purpose.
Scripture Reading for today: Esther 8; John 5 and 6 Philippians 2:13 NIV.
God removes…all these defects of character.
Okay. Let’s move away from our themes of
“entirely ready” and “defects of character” and turn June 22
our attention to God. But before we think about who
God IS and what He WILL do for us, take a close look Scripture Reading for today: Esther 8; John 7 and 8
at John 6:60‐71. Camp in it. Read it in a bunch of
different translations. Meditate on it. Ask God about Today one of my girlfriends and I were lamenting
it. the long list of shortcomings that is on each of our
Now. Notice the following: inventories (step four). We realized that when we
“Many of his disciples said, “This is very hard to began this 12‐step process and made our first step‐
understand. How can anyone accept it?” four inventory, we didn’t have the insight to discern
our defects, but now the picture is clearing up. Some
124
days we don’t like what we see. But. (In a sentence, are those “others” and so on our good days, we’re
the most important truth usually follows the “but.”) gentle with ourselves and others.
But in spite of all that we see about ourselves, we There’s actually biblical support for building a faith
draw comfort from the truth that God is and God community on these principles.
will. He has a plan and a purpose for our lives (see …these things happened to them as examples and
Jeremiah 9:11). It isn’t up to us to fulfill them; IT IS were written down as warnings for us. 1 Corinthians
UP TO HIM. If you don’t hear another thing, hear 10:11 NIV
this: if you will be responsible to God, He will take Now these things occurred as examples to keep us
responsibility for you! How awesome is that? It is so from setting our hearts on evil things as they did. 1
awesome, I want to repeat it: if you will but believe Corinthians 10:6 NIV
and be responsible TO God for every single detail of Many people get stuck in their spiritual journeys
your life, God is and God will accept responsibility because they simply fail to believe that God is and
for the outcome while simultaneously meeting your God will.
every need (forget about your every want; that kind Another thing we believe at NSC is that God has
of self‐centered defect will be removed as you big plans for all of us—a place in His story—a
proceed). Let the truth of that run around in your purpose for living and a reason for getting entirely
head and heart. ready to have God remove all our nasty little defects
of character. We believe God doesn’t discriminate.
Thought for today: Now it is God who makes both us We believe He’s less concerned with our current
and you stand firm in Christ. He anointed us, set his state than He is with our potential. That’s important
seal of ownership on us, and put His Spirit in our because sometimes we fall short of God’s big
hearts as a deposit, guaranteeing what is to come. 2 dreams for us and lose our place in the story.
Corinthians 1: 21‐22 NIV Everyone I know who has lost their place in the
story has a tendency to fall into patterns of thinking,
Thought for tomorrow: God is in the business of believing, and responding to the world that
supporting us each and every day. We have a part in ultimately lead to pain and suffering. Defects of
positioning ourselves in such a way that we can character emerge. The blame game is initiated.
recognize the support He provides (steps one Others fall into the role of perpetual victim.
through six), but make no mistake: He provides. He Even with all the misbehaving that goes along with
does this not because we are inherently deserving, losing one’s place, getting off track, and falling into a
but because he is inherently loving. When life’s rut of resistance, I’m still a raging optimist. I know
circumstances call that truth into question, we can that God does not interrupt the shortcomings and
know this: we simply don’t have all the facts, see the foibles of others capriciously. Some mistake God’s
big picture, or know what is taking place in the patience for a lack of His presence. That’s not true.
unseen world. God is love. He will never violate His God is and He will, even as He allows his children to
character nor abandon His plans. God is and God choose for themselves how they will live. Some have
will. made quite a mess of things.
Unbelievably, even this messiness can be good
June 23 news. God has allowed others the freedom to
choose and even lose their place in the story, but He
Scripture Reading for today: Esther 9; John 9 and 10 has not allowed the experiences to go to waste. He
has given us a way to look back and learn from their
At NorthStar Community (NSC), we spend a lot of mistakes. I suppose that’s why living and loving in
time in community. We learn from each other’s the context of a faith community is so crucial. It’s
mistakes. We don’t try to dust ourselves off, polish one of the ways God accomplishes what He is up to
our crowns and show up to our group meetings and and will see accomplished.
worship experiences all neat and tidy and perfect.
We don’t have conversations about how we wish Thought for today: Therefore, since we are
“others” could get it together. We realize that we surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us
125
throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so love blanketed the little girl who loved to play ball
easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance but hated to swing for the fences.
the race marked out for us. Hebrews 12:1 NIV Softball lovers everywhere would consider this
kid’s failure to swing a defect of character. But she’s
Thought for tomorrow: I wonder if this news makes grown up into quite an accomplished woman even
it a bit easier to stare hard into the face of our with her history of “no hit” seasons. Big deal. So she
shortcomings and accept God’s offer to help. never hit a baseball. But when we leave our spiritual
“Entirely ready” is like a get out of “defect” free bats in the dugout, that’s no laughing matter.
card. We can join a community where we’re not God has told us that He is “Rapha” (“rapha” is a
alone; others have experienced the same troubles Hebrew word literally meaning “to heal, one stitch at
and shared the same shortcomings. We can learn a time”) God. He has promised to adopt us, heal us,
new ways of believing, thinking, feeling, and restore us, renew us and in the process to transform
behaving. We can allow God to guide us, provide for us. He’s got a big job. Fortunately, He’s God and can
us, and equip us with what we need to thrive on handle it.
planet earth. Lots of times God uses our community But we have a job, too. Sure, he gives us the
to fulfill His promises to us. We can do this because willingness, the ability and the resources to
God is and God will. Even in this moment God is in accomplish it. He designs us with the perfect
the unseen world, cheering us on to victory. It is past temperament type, love language, gifts, talents,
time for us to reject the lies that no one shortcomings, and character defects to make us
understands, that nothing will ever change, and that perfect for the mission He’s sent us to accomplish.
there is no hope. Are you ready? But we’ve got to be willing to pick up the bat. We’ve
got to learn how to read the pitch and swing at the
June 24 appropriate time. We’ve got to allow God to teach
us the proper way to swing, and let go of our
Scripture Reading for today: Esther 10; John 11 and improper techniques that hold us back. Step six is
12 one step in the process required to become an
awesome player in the kingdom of God.
Years ago, before my daughter grew up; she was a
little girl who loved to play softball. One year Thought for today: Now the Lord is the Spirit, and
Meredith had a teammate who was particularly where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom. And
precious. This kid was (and is) awesome. She liked we, who with unveiled faces all reflect the Lord’s
softball, but I wouldn’t say she loved it or made it an glory, are being transformed into his likeness with
obsession. She enjoyed it, and she seemed to feel ever‐increasing glory, which comes from the Lord,
absolutely no pressure to perform. It didn’t bother who is the Spirit. 2 Corinthians 3:17‐18 NIV
her a bit that she went the entire season (every
season) without swinging a bat. Oh, she got up to Thought for tomorrow: I suggest that it is far better
the plate to bat. She just never swung at the ball. to go down swinging, learn from our strikeouts, and
Lots of times she’d “get lucky” and get hit by a return to swing another day than simply to stand at
pitch or walked by a pitcher having a bad day. She the plate and hope we get hit by an incoming pitch.
loved those days and would trot off to first with a Are you ready to rise above your limitations?
fist‐pumping delight usually reserved for a sweet,
home‐run hit. Most days, she went down with three June 25
strikes.
The girls’ coach (a remarkably patient woman) was Scripture Reading for today: Zechariah 1; John 13
known to mutter from the dugout, “Why are you and 14
taking that bat with you? Just leave it here in the
dugout. Save your strength.” It was said in jest and “Teresa, you just don’t understand.”
everyone knew it. Soft chuckles of acceptance and “Okay, explain it to me.”
126
“I’ve never had what I need in life. I’m like Sarah deception that He isn’t and doesn’t want to meet
McLachlan, in that song she sings, when she says our every need.
she’s ‘trying to make up for all that she lacks’.” Part of allowing God to remove our defects of
I don’t say this, but I think it. When we’re character must involve a decision on our part: we
determined to trust in our shortcomings and defects must learn to trust in the very character of God. He
over and above all else, I suppose any excuse works. says He’ll meet our needs. He does not say how,
My friend has made some terrible, unconscionable when, where, or from whom the help will be
life choices. If you knew her story, it would be hard delivered. So while you’re waiting for God to do His
for you to not judge her. You would have to work thing, get busy doing yours: make your day‐to‐day
hard to make eye contact, and not avert your eyes thoughts, actions, and decisions align with what you
from the carnage of her life. The reason she is giving know is true. Just do it.
to justifying her horrible life is simple: she lacks.
June 26
Thought for today: …the Lord your God has been
with you, and you have not lacked anything. Scripture Reading for today: Zechariah 2; John 15
Deuteronomy 2:7 NIV and 16
The Lord is my shepherd; I have all that I need.
Psalm 23:1 NLT Who is this God who is and will? What can we
expect from Him?
Thought for tomorrow: Scripture teaches us that we It’s in Christ that we find out who we are and what
can all have lives that thrive. We can rise above our we are living for. Long before we first heard of Christ
limitations as we find our way back to God. The key and got our hopes up, he had his eye on us, had
is in the finding our way back. It’s okay to wrestle designs on us for glorious living, part of the overall
with what it means to say that we have all that we purpose he is working out in everything and
need. But how does one hold onto this truth in the everyone. Ephesians 1: 11‐12 The Message
midst of deprivation, abuse, neglect, and evil? How He came and preached peace to you who were far
does one respond to this spiritual perspective after away and peace to those who were near. For
one’s husband has just told his wife of many years through him we both have access to the Father by
that he’s leaving, and he’s already signed a lease on one Spirit. Ephesians 2:17‐18 NIV
a new bachelor pad? This is what we can expect from Him: He wants us
I’m not saying it’s easy; I am suggesting that if to discover both our identity and purpose through
we’re followers of Christ, we must deal with the the eyes of Christ as opposed to from the world in
promises of God as they apply to our situation. So which we live. He has His eye on us and big plans for
here’s what we know about who God is and what He glorious living—plans that somehow, in some
says He will do. God acts as our protector, provider, amazingly mysterious way take into account and do
and gift giver. God is holy, and He never delights in not interfere with all the big plans He has for all the
the things we do that we might call “bad behaving.” other kids that He loves and also has His eye on. He
God delights in us. When God looks at us, He sees wants us to be a people of peace—the peace comes
our potential; He recognizes His handiwork from the Father by the Spirit. You can’t buy it in a
(Ephesians 1:4). God is never in denial and is aware bottle, smoke it, or hum your way to it. It’s a gift
of our problems, but He doesn’t allow our human from God Himself.
frailties to define us. This is true of God even if we’re Bottom line: God is and God will. Who God is and
in the middle of a situation that seems to defy that what He will do is not dependent upon us. The
reality. reality of God is not established as a result of what
Simply put: God is and God will, but He cannot and we choose to believe. God is God. Whether we have
will not if we’re living independently of Him, going access to His big plans for us does depend on
our own way, doing our own thing, making excuses whether we choose to become entirely ready to let
for our shortcomings, and buying the seductive Him have His way with us (this often accomplished
127
by completing steps 1‐12 of the Christ‐centered 12 am God, and there is none like me. I make known the
steps). end from the beginning, from ancient times, what is
God is in the business of taking ordinary, still to come. I say: My purpose will stand, and I will
sometimes ragamuffin humans and bestowing upon do all that I please. Isaiah 46:9‐10 NIV
them glory. That’s huge. It’s hard to fathom.
“Teresa, I hear what you’re saying. I really do. But Thought for tomorrow: I don’t know about you, but
I’m not glorious; I’m merely a survivor. I don’t have with all this power, potential, and purposing of God,
one speck of glory in my life. Maybe I’m not the type I’m ready to do whatever it takes to get into the
of person He uses…” game, the race, the story—any adventure He has
This gal has my curiosity aroused. I believe that planned for me.
God’s word is truth. If He says He created us to be
manifestations of His glory, then by golly, so it will June 27
be. So I ask a question. “Tell me why you say you’re a
survivor.” Scripture Reading for today: Zechariah 3; John 17
“Well, I survived having my first child at 15. He’s and 18
grown now and a marvelous young man. I guess
we’re both survivors.” Then she looks down with a Some of the defects of character that I hear about
self‐deprecating little laugh that lacks humor. as I listen to my friends’ stories make me cry. In fact,
“SURVIVOR! YOU CALL THAT SURVIVING? MY I just hung up the phone with a precious friend. I’ve
GOSH, YOU’VE LOST YOUR PLACE IN THE STORY!!!” (I been crying for her, with her, and about her
tend to get over‐excited when I encounter someone circumstance for a good long time this afternoon.
in need of finding their place in God’s grand epic and She’s a Princess Warrior, and she felt no need to
glorious adventure.) conclude her story like so many do: Why did God let
“Here’s a different perspective. You could have this happen to me?
aborted your son or thrown him in the trash. You My friend’s approach to her horrible situation
could have given him up for adoption—a good reminds me of a guy named Joseph. You remember
choice and far better than option one—and this him, don’t you? Joseph was a “pretty boy” in the
choice would have allowed you to resume your Bible. He was his daddy’s favorite and because of
teenage life. But you didn’t. You chose to keep him this he was rewarded with an amazing coat of many
and raise him and provide him with a good home. colors. He was also selected by God to be a leader.
Woman, that takes courage. That’s stepping up to Joseph became a great leader and saved the lives of
the plate. You are no survivor, you’re a Princess many, because God is and God will. But Joseph had
Warrior! You fought for your place as his mother, some tears to shed and suffering to endure on the
and by all accounts he’s a fine adult. Not everyone road to his grand epic adventure.
can say they have fought so hard against desperate He made a crucial mistake and told his brothers
odds and come out with such excellent results. I about a dream he had where he ruled over them.
think to say you are a survivor is to lose your place in This did not make the brothers happy. Couple this
the story.” She straightened up her shoulders, lifted with his favored‐child status and that incredible
her head and returned to her place on the line. coat, and you end up with family drama. The
This is the line that believers straddle: one foot in brothers toss Joseph in a well, sell him into slavery,
the seen world (unplanned pregnancies, abuse, and tell their father that Joseph was killed by lions.
neglect and other messy life experiences here) and Things don’t get less traumatizing once Joseph lands
another firmly planted in the unseen world (the in Egypt. He is sexually harassed by the boss’s wife,
kingdom of God on earth). It’s not an easy job, but refuses her advances, and lands in jail, falsely
God gives us the equipment to flourish in the midst accused by the scorned woman of rape. Eventually,
of the battle. after further trials and tribulations, God’s purpose
prevails and Joseph’s dream comes true. (Don’t
Thought for today: Remember the former things, make the mistake of thinking that all the messiness
those of long ago; I am God, and there is no other. I was in any way NOT part of God’s plan; God used
128
the suffering to fine tune Joseph’s character so that husband and marrying her boss. She wasn’t asking
he could stand up under all the blessings God was for my opinion, and I respected that by keeping my
going to heap upon him.) big mouth shut. But it didn’t preclude me from going
Because God is and will, He arranges for a reunion home and giving her premise serious consideration.
with the brothers. It’s a long story worthy of your Every single one of us has a purpose, and it involves
attention, but this is a daily devotional—not a book! the saving of many lives. Joseph saved people as the
For our purposes, the key passage is found in result of excellent business practices that led to a
Genesis 50, verse 20: “You intended to harm me, but supply of grain that could save other nations from a
God intended it for good to accomplish what is now severe famine. That’s literally saving physical lives.
being done, the saving of many lives,” says Joseph to Others save lives as they encourage and uplift,
his brothers, when they realize that he is alive. thereby refreshing spirits and enabling people to
keep on keeping on. Some do it by making coffee
Thought for today: God‐vision goggles (an ability to and conversation with lonely, thirsty people in
recognize the workings of the unseen world in the convenience stores and coffee shops. The list of
midst of seen‐world stuff) provide a glimpse into the ways God uses us to help people find their way back
unseen world that refreshes our view; Joseph had to God is endless. The point isn’t where we are
those goggles firmly in place. Suffering is inexplicable called or even so much the particulars of what we
in the seen world. While the seen world disappoints are called to do. The point is that we are called by
and distresses, the unseen world enriches and God—the God who is and will –to be the kind of
enlarges our perspective. Joseph didn’t fall into the person who can exhibit the character necessary to
trap of denial and pretend the well‐and‐slavery‐ do whatever the thing is he or she needs to do at
selling incident was an accident. He didn’t travel to any given moment that will “save” others from a life
the land of bitterness and believe he was destined to of quiet desperation and despair.
a life of abandonment at the hands of an absent With that definition, my friend leaving her
God. No doubt he spent a lot of time pondering his husband for her buff boss doesn’t qualify as a
fate, searching for meaning, and it seems he peered purposeful, Christ‐centered life choice. That decision
intently into the unseen world. He turned to God is more intimately related to a character defect. It’s a
and believed. When his brothers arrived on the selfish, self‐centered, desperate attraction to a man
scene, he was able to help them with their famine who has no respect for the sanctity of marriage (his
problem. Eventually, the family was reunited. In the or hers). It’s going to create chaos and confusion,
process, many lives were saved. spawn guilt and shame, break hearts, and wreck
homes. I sure wish my friend had a working
Thought for tomorrow: God’s plans for you may not knowledge of the sixth step.
involve the same kinds of trials that Joseph
experienced, but don’t get distracted in the midst of Thought for today: You’re a hardheaded bunch and
your trials. God is at work. Cooperate. My friend hard to help. I’m ready to help you right now.
who is suffering under great duress reminded me Deliverance is not a long‐range plan. Salvation isn’t
that God is still at work in her life no matter how bad on hold. Isaiah 46:12‐13 The Message
the current circumstances appear. She reminded me
that she is choosing to believe that God is and God Thought for tomorrow: My friend made the decision
will. It’s a privilege to have a friend like that. to divorce her husband and marry the “love of her
life” despite the efforts of many to save her from
June 28 herself. That was five years ago. Yesterday she called
me, devastated. The “love of her life” just left her for
Scripture Reading for today: Zechariah 4; John 19 his buff boss. Some of our mutual friends believe this
and 20 is what she deserves. I can’t find the energy to
delight in her suffering, because she doesn’t suffer
I had a friend try to tell me that she was certain alone. Sometimes our hardheaded defects of
that God’s purpose for her life involved leaving her character result in the suffering of many (as opposed
129
to the saving of many). I know. She should have Thought for today: Father God, restore to me the joy
known better. I know. But so should we. Aren’t we in of your salvation. Psalm 51:12 NIV
danger of instigating pain and suffering in the lives of
ourselves and others when we continue to be hard Thought for tomorrow: We can pray this because
to help? God is and He will.

June 29 June 30

Scripture Reading for today: Zechariah 5 and 6; John Scripture Reading for today: Zechariah 6, 7 and 8
21
One defect of character that is pesky and must be
God is and will. He is incomparable, irreplaceable, mentioned before we head off to step seven is
the only God we’ve ever had or ever will have (all grandiose thinking. When one of my brothers was
our pathetic substitutes are faux gods—hardly worth about three, he got involved in some serious
our consideration). We can acknowledge this, and grandiose thinking. He told anyone that would listen
learn how to listen for His quiet voice of support and that when he grew up, he was going to drive a trash
guidance, or we can continue to be hardheaded. truck, fly an airplane, work with a “dirt picker upper”
truck, be a racecar driver AND be a dog catcher with
Who can forget the story of Moses? He was a Jewish a cool truck. That’s grandiose thinking; it would be
son born during a time when all Jewish sons were awfully hard to perform all these jobs satisfactorily
supposed to be killed at birth. Moses survived. and simultaneously. Sometimes when we remember
Because God is and God will. Enslaved in Egypt, the who God is and what He will do in our lives, we
Jewish people had grown and flourished under the ourselves get all excited and grandiose. Please don’t
tyrannical and cruel reign of the latest Pharaoh. let the awesomeness of God lead you to faulty
Huh? Flourished. Yes. Because God is and God will. thinking about what He might call you to do as he
They were driven harder, punished more, killed teaches you who you are to “be.”
intentionally, fed less, given fewer supplies and God is in the business of doing grand things in
greater quotas; still, they thrived. Because God is sometimes unexpected places. I suspect many a
and God will. Ultimately, Moses leads his people to grand epic adventure is lived out in relative
freedom and they cart off a fortune in Egyptian anonymity in the seen world. (But what a party they
plunder. Why were the Egyptians willing to free must throw in the heavenlies when we step up to
these slaves and send their wealth with them? the plate, swing for the fences, and hit God’s plan for
Because God is and God will. us out of the ballpark!)
During this time, the Jewish people lost sight of I happen to know people who work in a gas station
God. They got caught up in their suffering. I wonder in my neighborhood. I imagine they get paid
if we’ve somehow gotten caught up in the pain of minimum wage to sell gas and other convenience
our own particular bondage—our shortcomings, items. But several of these employees seem to know
defects of character, false beliefs, and trinket gods of the larger truth—the sacred and secret truth—that
our limited understanding. Maybe along the way we even in relative obscurity, they are called to step as
lost our God‐vision goggles and in the process, lost God speaks and to save the lives of many. They know
our place in the story (God’s grand epic adventure their place in the story.
for us). Maybe our lives lack meaning and purpose— Every morning I pop in and get a fresh cup of
not because we have none—but because we’ve lost coffee. Recently, upon returning from a trip, I
sight of the richness of the life we already possess. resumed my routine and headed off to work via my
We’ve let seen world things distract us from the local full‐service gas station. The attendant greeted
utter “ISness” and “WILLness” of God. If so, now me with a hearty smile and a question, “Where have
might be a great time to lift this prayer up to Him. you been? We’ve been worried sick about you. I
even put you on my church’s prayer line! If you
hadn’t shown up today, we were going over to that
130
church and see what was going on with you! Next STEP 7 We humbly asked him (God) to remove our
time you leave town, I expect you to tell me.” shortcomings.
It so happens that during my absence, I had
developed a painful health condition and had July 1
entered the store on this particular morning not only
jet‐lagged, but in rather significant pain. I can’t tell Scripture Reading for today: Psalm 40, Proverbs 14;
you how this woman’s concern for me lifted my Zechariah 9
spirits. She felt like a life saver to me on that cold,
blustery day. I walked out of that station with a big Confession time: I didn’t grow up believing in
cup of coffee and a smile on my face. I was missed. shortcomings. In the 70s and 80s, we were reading
Someone noticed I was gone. I left that place well books like I’m OK, You’re OK. In my psychology
aware of my blessings and hardly noticing my classes I studied theories about human
discomfort. development; most of them seemed to indicate that
The gas company pays them to sell cigarettes and my parents had done something to mess me up
soda and crackers. God is going to reward them for because, after all, I was born perfect. (The fact that
their calling as missionaries in their community. I bet parents could harm children is a little inconsistent
some would say that working in a convenience store with everyone always being OK, but sometimes
is not their ideal place of employment. (Not very people don’t want you to get confused by the facts.)
grandiose sounding, is it?) But if one knows the Perhaps no one actually said this, or meant it, but
sacred and secret truths about the God who is and that’s what I heard.
will then they know that anywhere God plants us is B. F. Skinner, a noted behavioral psychologist of
the ideal place to thrive. the day, reportedly raised his kid in a box! The
underlying belief in his theory was that we are born
Thought for today: I will give you a new heart and like a blank slate, and if parents write carefully on
put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your the slate, they create good kids. When I was in my
heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh. And I will twenties, single and childless, these theories were
put my Spirit in you and move you to follow my fine with me. I liked the idea that if, by chance,
decrees and be careful to keep my laws. Ezekiel 36: someone found a “shortcoming” in me, it was surely
26‐27 NIV someone else’s fault: bad writing on a blank slate!
The Lord has already told you what is good, and Then I grew up. I birthed babies. These theories
this is what he requires: To do what is right, to love didn’t sound so cool once I became the parental
mercy, and to walk humbly with your God.” Micah unit. In spite of my best intentions and in defiance of
6:8 NLT all psychological theories, I never birthed a single
blank slate. When we met our firstborn in the
Thought for tomorrow: How limited is our vision delivery room, her dad, fearing that the bright lights
without God‐vision goggles! While we’re staying up of the operating room would hurt her newborn eyes,
late strategizing about how to execute some shielded them with his hand, and up she gazed. She
grandiose plan of our own, God is at rest, calmly crinkled that little forehead and studied us with rapt
executing His purposes that are guaranteed to attention. She looked like she had several questions
prevail. and wanted answers immediately. We hadn’t had a
chance to whip out our chalk and write on her slate,
but we soon discovered that this look was vintage
Meredith.
Our second born also came mysteriously pre‐
wired. That kid slept all the time. Initially, I thought it
was because we gave him a pacifier. He gave that up
years ago, but that young man still loves to sleep.
Scott can relax and live fully present in the moment.
131
He never makes you feel rushed. He’s always got Hold your horses. Don’t go jumping to conclusions.
time to sit and listen. Evil at its core can best be defined as any time we
The third pregnancy was a challenge. I worried live independently of God. That’s what this verse is
during the day because the baby never moved. I conveying. It’s not saying we’re all serial killers who
couldn’t sleep at night because he kicked and carried are beyond redemption. It’s simply saying that for
on. He’s an adolescent now and is still a nocturnal any individual not to find their way back to God, the
creature. Of our three, he is the most likely to have God who so lovingly crafted them before He hung
trouble sleeping if his routine is disrupted. Michael the first star—that’s evil. You see, the best life any of
keeps our evenings lively, with lots of activity and us can hope for is a life lived within the frame of our
friends. He still loves to move and kick and carry on. God‐created identity. That’s where the good stuff is
These three kids have the same parents, yet each found. Nothing else will ever quite measure up to a
child is very different. I bet you have stories like this life lived the way God created for us.
one as well. This is what I like to call a divine paradox. Because
Once the blank‐slate theory didn’t pan out, it God says the nature of man—to grow forgetful of
wasn’t long before the “born good only to be ruined Him—is evil. But this same God looked at the work
by your parental units theory” also took a hit in my of His creative hand, humankind, and pronounced it
book. Our kids weren’t always good, and sometimes “very good.” We have been pronounced “very good”
I couldn’t find a way to blame myself or my spouse by God Himself; yet we have a predisposition to live
for their bad behaving. independently of Him, which is evil.
And the “I’m OK, You’re OK” belief didn’t work for We were created to live in awesome, intimate
us either. We weren’t okay all the time. So here’s relationship with God, others, and even ourselves.
what my husband and I have decided. It doesn’t But we have this nasty tendency to grow forgetful:
much matter how we acquired our particular forgetful of God, forgetful of why we exist, and
shortcomings, who is to blame, or even why we are forgetful of our true God‐created identity. As we
the way we are. forget, we lose sight of how much we are loved. We
grow insecure and look for love in all the wrong
Thought for today: The first man seems right until places. We lose our place in the story that God has
the second man speaks. Proverbs written out for us. We look for meaning and
significance in all the wrong places. The by‐product
Thought for tomorrow: What does matter, and of all this forgetfulness is the development of
matters quite a lot, is that our shortcomings hinder shortcomings. All of us have shortcomings,
us. God doesn’t want us to be limited in any way; He limitations, defects of character, and on occasion,
wants us to live a free, abundant life. So those bad behavior. As I said yesterday, the how we got
shortcomings have got to go! here may be far less important than our need to
simply acknowledge that shortcomings exist. Having
July 2 accomplished this feat in previous steps, we can look
forward now, if we ask humbly, to God doing for us
Scripture Reading for today: Psalm 41, Proverbs 15; what we cannot do for ourselves.
Zechariah 10
Thought for today: “It’s in Christ that we find out
As a person who really loved my years studying who we are and what we are living for. Long before
psychology, I value the things we learn from that we first heard of Christ and got our hopes up, he had
field. What I particularly enjoy is when man’s his eye on us, had designs on us for glorious living,
research catches up with God’s word! When it part of the overall purpose he is working out in
comes to shortcomings, scripture puts a different everything and everyone.” Ephesians 1:11‐12 The
spin on defects of character. Genesis, the first book Message
found in scripture, says this: “…every inclination of
his heart is evil from childhood.” Genesis 8:21 NIV Thought for tomorrow: I pray that today is the day
you make that grand decision.
132

July 3 Thought for tomorrow: I hope my son knows that a
parent keeps an eagle eye on her children for the
Scripture Reading for today: Psalm 42, Proverbs 16; purpose of strengthening them—not to punish or
Zechariah 11 even reward—but as a loving act of vigilance. I’m not
talking about codependent, super controlling, over‐
I used to be a very skittish parent. When my the‐top skittish parenting, but I am talking about
children were young, my husband and I had a parenting the way God does: imitating Him. Second
passionate desire to shield our children from any Chronicles tells us that God is super‐vigilant in a
influence that would harm them. And sometimes, thoroughly non‐codependent way. God is in the
looking back, I think we went a little overboard. Like business of watching for someone—anyone—who is
the time we didn’t let our daughter watch the movie committed to Him, SO HE CAN STRENGTHEN THEM.
E.T. because it had a bad word in it (they named a God knows a lot of stuff that I don’t. He gets the fact
male body part)…and she was 16. Just kidding. She that children eventually grow up and will choose for
was eight—probably the only child in America who themselves how they will live and who they will
didn’t get to watch E.T. until she was practically able serve. My daughter can watch ET or Desperate
to vote. Housewives or any darn thing she pleases now that
Our sons didn’t escape this vigilance either. When she’s all grown up. Scott can trade baseball cards or
Scott was in kindergarten, there were some “trading porn magazines with his friends now that he’s in
cards” that were all the rage. Baseball cards were college and has his own pad. So now I know this. It is
fine, but we didn’t like these cards for some reason. I a far better thing for me as a parent to model and
can’t remember why, but I thought they were evil. teach and encourage my children to have hearts that
And so I didn’t want him to have any. He disagreed. are fully committed to God than it is to make sure
And so he acquired a few and began trading them at they are shielded from the world. (That’s not to say
school. He hid them in his backpack. I suspect he I’m going to stop shielding; I’m just trying to not “go
thought he was pretty clever, but one day I caught codependent.”) So we ask God to remove our
him. He came through the door and must have made shortcomings (things that self and others need
some clandestine trades on the bus. He paused in shielding from), but we ask humbly. For we know
the entrance foyer to hide his stash, and I just that when we ask with hearts that are fully
happened to see his reflection in our glass fireplace committed to Him, God himself reaches across
screen. That furtive behavior combined with a eternity to strengthen us. I trust that truth fills us all
mother’s intuition soon brought the house of cards with awe.
crashing down. I swear, that kid thought I was
psychic for years! He thought I had eyes that saw July 4
through walls and around corners. I didn’t disavow
him of this belief. It came in handy as a parenting Scripture Reading for today: Psalm 43, Proverbs 17;
tool. Zechariah 12
I wonder what my son thought of that “ability.”
Did he think I was eagerly spying on his every move, “Humility is one of humanity’s most elusive and
hoping to catch him in an act of disobedience? Could attractive characteristics. While we ourselves may
it be that he thought I was trying to catch him in the not pursue humility, we are drawn to it in others.
act of behaving well, so that I could reward him Humility not only draws others to us, but draws God
richly with those words of affirmation that I love to to us. Humility is not about having a low self‐image
dole out? Hmmm…I need to ask him. or poor self‐esteem. Humility is about self‐
awareness. It is important to be self‐aware in
Thought for today: “For the eyes of the Lord range relationship to our gifts, talents, skills, and intellect,
throughout the earth to strengthen those whose but in regard to our spiritual health, it is far more
hearts are fully committed to him.” 2 Chronicles 16:9 essential that we are self‐aware in the arena of
NIV personal character. If you see yourself for who you
133
are and embrace it honestly, humility is the natural It’s a dangerous question to ignore.
result. God isn’t asking you to say something about I concluded yesterday’s devotional with this verse:
yourself that isn’t true. God is asking that we take a “It’s common knowledge that God goes against the
good, long look in the mirror and see ourselves for willful proud; God gives grace to the willing humble.”
who we truly are, and then after that, to have the James 4:6 The Message
courage to ask for help. Humility begins by emptying As I sit in silent agony watching a marriage dissolve
ourselves of ourselves. It is about coming to God like ice cream on a summer day, I wonder. Is the
without agenda and without reservation. If you are truth of this verse common knowledge? Because if it
still relating to God through negotiations, you have were, I think all of us would take our “mistakes”
not yet found the path of humility. This is not an more seriously.
emptiness that makes us hollow, but a humility that The word “goes against” in this passage is the
makes us teachable. There is much to discard if we Greek word, antitasso. It means to resist. It refers to
are to engage in this particular quest. We must make a well‐planned, military‐like operation of prepared
ourselves nothing in order to receive everything that resistance against someone else. So I want you to
God longs to give us.” from Uprising—A Revolution think about this for a moment. At any given moment
of the Soul by Erwin McManus (p. 46, 56) on any given day, when we are acting full of
ourselves, arrogant and pride‐filled, God is executing
Thought for today: It’s my prayer that the words of a well‐prepared, military‐esque strike against us.
Erwin McManus will inform your understanding of This does not in any way minimize his love for us. In
step seven. The kind of humility McManus writes fact, it’s a clear indicator of his grace towards us.
about is key if we want to see ourselves accurately, God is adamantly opposed to anything that seeks to
knowing the truth about ourselves: the good and the steal his rightful place in our hearts.
yet‐to‐be‐transformed!
Thought for today: “The pride of your heart has
Thought for tomorrow: “It’s common knowledge deceived you…Pride goes before destruction.”
that God goes against the willful proud; God gives Obadiah 1:3, Proverbs 16:18 NIV
grace to the willing humble.” James 4:6 The
Message Thought for tomorrow: I warn you in a spirit of love:
be aware of the force we are up against when we
July 5 choose to live independently of God (an act of
outrageous pride and arrogance).
Scripture Reading for today: Psalm 44, Proverbs 18;
Zechariah 13 July 6

“I know mistakes were made. I regret my part in Scripture Reading for today: Psalm 45, Proverbs 19;
this whole thing.” He squirms in his chair, avoiding Zechariah 14
eye contact with his wife of 30 years.
“What part do you regret?” She asks. (I think to “I think this is an act of the devil, come to kill,
myself, This woman is brilliant.) steal, and destroy me.”
“Do we really need to keep rehashing this? Like I “I wonder why God made me this way.”
said, mistakes were made.” He glares at her across Normally when faced with a shortcoming in
the distance that adultery brings to a marriage. He ourselves or in others, we want to know why. Why
seems pretty angry for a guy who just got caught this particular defect of character? How did this
with his hand in someone else’s cookie jar. But he is happen? In fact, as we learned in last month’s study
admitting wrongdoing, isn’t he? To the detached of step six, our search for understanding can become
listener (in this case me) it almost sounds like he a defect of character in and of itself! Sometimes this
said, “Mistakes were made. But not by me.” And I quest for understanding can distract us from looking
ask myself an old and oft‐repeated question: for a solution to the problem. But as I said, it’s
Where’s the humility?
134
normal to ask questions during times of serious
wrongdoing. Scripture Reading for today: Psalm 46; Proverbs 20;
As I sometimes sit and listen to woeful stories of Jeremiah 1
abuse and neglect, mistake‐making and wrongdoing,
I must admit, I’ve had a natural tendency to think Yesterday’s devotional delivered a tough message:
Satan himself is having a field day. After all, scripture God opposes those of us who are prideful. According
says, “The thief comes only to steal and kill and to the Greek word for “opposes,” God launches a
destroy…” John 10:10 NIV Certainly there is plenty of well‐prepared, carefully crafted military attack
stealing of dreams, killing of hope, and destroying of against those who refuse to humble themselves
lives going on in our world today. It makes sense that before Him. This is serious business!
the author of all this mayhem is the devil. As I was working through James four, doing my
But obvious answers aren’t always the entire word studies and realizing just how serious God is
story. Return with me to James 4:6 NIV: “God about the need for humility in our lives, several faces
opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.” flashed before my mind’s eye. I thought about
Yesterday’s devotional said that God resists the people whose lives seemed like they were going
proud. He opposes their every move. downhill fast, and I so hoped they would recognize
So I want you to give this some serious, prayerful how their pride was sinking them into deeper
consideration. Are you currently struggling with a distress. Then I realized that my very thoughts were
shortcoming that seems resistant to removal? Have arrogant! Who was I to judge them? Wasn’t that
you wondered if Satan is blocking God’s way? Have prideful? Does that mean I’ve invoked the
you questioned God, wondering why He hasn’t lived opposition of God in this area of my own life? Filled
up to his promises to heal you? Are you assuming with an uncomfortable feeling of wrongdoing, I
that God’s mercy and grace precludes any act of decided to follow my own imaginary advice to my
judgment on God’s part? Could it be that we’ve imaginary bad‐behaving friends, and I asked God to
presumed upon God’s grace? remove this defect of character: the propensity to
judge others (an act of arrogance).
Thought for today: “The Christian can rebuke the Since I’m holed up in a hotel room with only my
devil all day long, but it will be to no avail, for his Bible study supplies, I was mercifully not distracted
problem isn’t the devil—his problem is God!” from from my quest. First, I sat quietly with myself. I
Sparkling Gems from the Greek by Rick Renner (p. thought about my propensity to rush to judgment. I
437) was reminded of Juanita Ryan’s teachings on
“You’re cheating on God. If all you want is your suffering (you can find her audio study on the
own way, flirting with the world every chance you NorthStar Web site at
get, you end up enemies of God and his way.” James www.northstarcommunity.com/Step4.htm ). Ryan
4:4 The Message believes that we use judgmental attitudes to protect
us when a current‐day circumstance stirs up old,
Thought for tomorrow: I have been giving the unhealed wounds in our hearts. She’s a wise woman,
enemy too much credit. Satan cannot thwart the and I trusted that I should explore this thought as
work of God! But according to James, if we’re perhaps a gentle nudge from the Holy Spirit. I took
approaching God asking Him to deliver on His each face, each precious face that was currently
promises with a spirit of pride rather than an haunting me with its suffering (and arrogance, from
attitude of humility, God is resisting us. So let’s take my view). I thought about their lives and about mine.
a fresh look at our shortcomings and take more At what points do our stories intersect? And in each
seriously the attitude with which we approach the situation, their stories and my past sufferings had
throne of grace. Sometimes the grace and mercy of several elements in common. No wonder I was
God comes delivered by the strong hand of His tempted to judge them harshly; each one of them
discipline. represented a past harm done (by me or to me) in
my own life. All feelings of judgment evaporated. I
July 7 could move on.
135
Now I could feel the pain and suffering. I wait until I perceive myself to be practically perfect
experienced the past memories. I allowed myself to (as defined by the absence of all thoughts that might
feel these strong emotions without running to a jar be construed as judgmental) before I do what God
of peanut butter or putting in an exercise video to has called me to do. Now I have a new mission: how
distract me. I just allowed myself to marinate in the does one love a friend who’s acting all puffed up on
pain—present and past. Once I could fully identify the outside but is suffering on the inside? I can’t say
the nature of suffering, I was filled with a desire to how it is that my whole attitude and focus of
help those who were currently in this same kind of concern shifted, but I do know “who;” God is
distress. I realized that the pain of my past, although working in and with and through me, doing for me
strongly memorable, is no longer sharp and pointed. what I can’t do for myself. The tendency to jump to
But, oh, I could remember the day when it defined conclusions and judge people by their actions
me. I recalled how I must have looked to the outside happens. But one doesn’t have to be overcome by it.
world—arrogant, tough, angry, and filled with self‐ Pausing to prepare, listening to the Spirit of God
assurance—while on the inside I was struggling just whistle through our hearts, choosing to set aside the
to breathe. I realized my pride‐full acting buddies natural and pursue the “supernatural” way of
had far more going on in their hearts than they were viewing God, self, and others can lead us to new,
showing with their bravado. This truth I could refreshing ways of relating to each other. This takes
embrace with compassion. time. This requires us to be self‐aware (e.g. I’m
thinking judging thoughts), and then selfless (e.g. I’m
Thought for today: “Humility and fear of the Lord choosing a different way; this different way is
bring wealth and honor and life.” Proverbs 22:4 NIV uncomfortable; it’s taken me time to allow God to
reveal a new way of viewing things; “natural” feels
Thought for tomorrow: The Lord used Juanita Ryan right; but wait, I want to live life the way God says is
to remind me to be gentle with myself and others; right.)
He used McManus to shed some light on my next
step. Humility isn’t about a feeling so much as it is a July 8
commitment to obedience. I can choose to walk
humbly with my God even as I trust him to remove Scripture Reading for today: Psalm 47; Proverbs 21;
my shortcomings that seek to shame me. Humility, Jeremiah 2
and the search for it, is tricky business. Isn’t the
seeking after humility an indication of arrogance? One of the great paradoxes of a faith journey is the
Erwin McManus, in his book, Uprising, provides a tension between God’s opposition to evil and His
thought‐provoking look at this essential element of awesome love for us. When we live independently of
life lived God’s way. He suggests that we are not Him (that’s evil) He still loves us, but He hates what
called to pray for humility so much as we are we do. In fact, he opposes it. God—all‐knowing, all‐
commanded to be humble (p. 61). McManus adds, powerful, creator God—opposes evil doing. So it’s a
“While humility is a divine attribute, it is placed cool thing when we recognize the paradox in our
squarely on our shoulders to choose this path.” I own lives, and we get to experience the complicated
think I am beginning to see some light at the end of and vast mercy of God. In yesterday’s devotional I
my own personal tunnel of pride. I have asked God told you about my journey through the valley of
to remove my defect of character (in this case a pride. Clearly, scripture teaches that God doesn’t like
judgmental spirit), but it is now my job to walk in it when we’re prideful. But as I traveled through the
faith and to boldly believe that God is doing what He valley, God granted me grace. He restored me,
promised (removing my shortcomings). Now I must revived me, inspired me. I didn’t stay stuck in the
choose to walk in humility as opposed to arrogance. valley of the shadow of death, I was allowed passage
I started the morning focused on a shortcoming and out. And I left the valley with a question: Now what
now find myself all pumped up to figure out what do I do? And I believe he answered!
the next right step is for me in God’s grand epic I returned to my scripture study with a question:
adventure. That’s called process. I’m not going to how does a servant of God love on people who are
136
prickly and definitely not lovable at the moment? a person misbehaving and unrepentant is one who is
Pride is a prickly shirt, and it stings not only the definitely caught and held captive, forced to run the
wearer, but those who draw near. So without being devil’s errands.
judgmental, but trying to use good judgment, what’s
next? Thought for today: “And the servant of the Lord
Run away from infantile indulgence. Run after must not strive; but be gentle unto all men: apt to
mature righteousness—faith, love, peace—joining teach, patient.” 2 Timothy 2:24 (KJV)
those who are in honest and serious prayer before “And the Lord’s servant must not quarrel; instead,
God. Refuse to get involved in inane discussions; they he must be kind to everyone, able to teach, not
always end up in fights. God’s servant must not be resentful.” 2 Timothy 2:24 NIV
argumentative, but a gentle listener and a teacher
who keeps cool, working firmly but patiently with Thought for tomorrow: One of the blessings of living
those who refuse to obey. You never know how or a step‐seven kind of life is when the emptiness left
when God might sober them up with a change of behind (after the removal of a shortcoming) is filled
heart and a turning to the truth, enabling them to with the promises and blessings of God. This is one
escape the Devil’s trap, where they are caught and of those times. There is a way to exercise
held captive, forced to run his errands. 2 Timothy discernment (dude, that is seriously wrong) and not
2:22‐26 The Message rush to judgment (and I’m going to yell at you,
My goodness; imagine that! Perfect advice for just decide you’re an evil person, etc.). We can do this.
my situation penned thousands of years ago and But only if we allow God to have his way with our
tucked away in a little book in the back half of the shortcomings.
Bible! Those precious faces who had appeared in my
mind and heart as I studied on pride and arrogance July 9
didn’t pop into my thoughts randomly. It’s true;
every single one of them is in the midst of serious Scripture Reading for today: Psalm 48; Proverbs 22;
bad behaving and mocking God in the process. Jeremiah 3
(Don’t we mock God when we act as if it’s OK to live
independently of Him, having a form of godliness but I’ve been re‐reading Abraham Twerski’s book,
denying its power?) That doesn’t mean that two Addictive Thinking, for the billionth time. This time
wrongs make a right! It’s not right for me to judge through, I was struck by his strongly worded warning
them (another thing God says we are not to do) about the addicted mind’s strong resistance to
simply because they’re acting up. But they are acting change. Addicted thinkers hate change of all kinds
up! and will go to any length to maintain the status quo.
Anyway, 2 Timothy tells me what to do. Paul tells That can be a serious stumbling block for a person
us in this letter to Timothy that we are to be patient working step seven. Willingness to change is
(“aneksikakos”), meaning, “an attitude that is absolutely essential to the recovery process.
tolerant and that bears with a bad, depraved or evil After a fun trip to Atlanta to surprise my mom on
response. (June 24 study in Rick Renner’s book, her birthday, it was time for me to head home. Of
Sparkling Gems from the Greek) course, my flight was delayed. I wandered down to
Bad, depraved, and evil behavior is what it is. It’s one of the newsstands in the area of my departure
not judgmental to recognize it. In fact, to pretend gate and chose a book and a bottled water to
otherwise is to live in the land of denial. But it is also distract me while I waited. Total cost: eleven dollars
important to be patient, trust God in the processing, and some change. I handed the clerk a twenty and
don’t rush to judgment, and not become held out my hand.
argumentative. We must learn how to listen and She looked at my hand, glanced at my face, fished
keep our cool. We must act in faith that if God’s not in her cash drawer and handed me a one dollar bill
finished with us just yet, He’s probably still got the and various coins. I stared at my change and
time and energy to also work with others. And don’t considered my choices. After a brief pause, I told her
forget that all of this must be done with compassion; that she hadn’t given me enough change. I reminded
137
her that I’d given her a twenty, and she owed me Giving back extra change and not blasting some
seven dollars and a few cents. She smiled, nodded, stranger on an airplane are minor moments in a
reached randomly into her drawer and pulled out lifetime of character development opportunities; it’s
two twenties, more change, and added a five for not like someone asked for a kidney (and I only had
good measure. one to give). But I believe that if we ignore these
I quickly handed her back the money, and told her seemingly small and inconsequential opportunities
that this time she’d given me too much. By this time to develop our character, then we will not be
the line behind me was stretching out longer than equipped to handle the profound issues that arise
the cue of angry customers at the departure gate of when we heed God’s call. If I want to be a person
a flight that had just announced its third delay of the who participates in God’s grand epic adventure and
morning. The man behind me began to offer helps change the world, I’d better be a person who
suggestions. “Lady, just take what she gives you. can handle “change.” This is a far more serious
Hey, consider it your lucky day.” matter than having a few people yell at you at a
“What’s taking so long? Geez, I’ve got a flight to newsstand and one guy tease you on a crowded
catch!” This sentiment was quickly spreading among airplane.
the crowd of book buyers and magazine grabbers.
Even some kid who couldn’t have been over ten and Thought for today: Show me your ways, O Lord,
stood a whopping three feet tall started hassling me. teach me your paths. Guide me in your truth and
I wanted to shout back to the crowd, “It’s not my teach me, for you are God my Savior, and my hope is
fault! This poor lady doesn’t even speak English! in you all day long. . . . Good and upright is the Lord;
She’s going to get in big trouble, maybe fired, when therefore he instructs sinners in his ways. He guides
someone tries to balance her cash drawer tonight! the humble in what is right and teaches them his
I’m trying to help her out! Don’t you guys get it?” way. All the ways of the Lord are loving and faithful
As it turned out, I ended up sitting next to the man for those who keep the demands of his covenant. For
who had suggested that I consider this my lucky day. the sake of your name, O Lord, forgive my iniquity,
He bought a magazine, a candy bar, and a soda and though it is great. Psalm 25:4‐5, 8‐11 NIV
proudly announced that he grossed a profit of
twenty dollars and some change. He teased me for a Thought for tomorrow: If you’re feeling frustrated
solid ten minutes about my lack of entrepreneurial with God’s seemingly slow response to your request
spirit. To him, this was all a big joke. for the removal of your shortcomings, could it be
I think that it was at this moment that my character that what is really going on is a stubborn resistance
was seriously called into question. Frankly, cheating to change?
that nice lady wasn’t even a temptation for me.
What tried my spirit was this guy in seat 15B. I July 10
silently plotted revenge. I thought of great
comebacks and biting repartee. My favorite line that Scripture Reading for today: Psalm 49; Proverbs 23;
I considered using was this: “I just feel like my Jeremiah 4
integrity is worth a lot more than twenty bucks and
some change.” Oh, how I wanted to say it. But I Someone once told me that polls indicate that
refrained. Why? Because I recognized an people’s number one fear is public speaking but I
opportunity for change. don’t believe it! I think any reasonable person will
Sometimes character is forged in grocery lines and agree that the scariest thing in the world is driving
traffic lights, on ball fields and shopping malls, at down Interstate 95 late at night in bumper‐to‐
home in the middle of an argument with your bumper traffic with a bunch of people who think
spouse, or at the end of a long car trip with whining nothing of going 90 miles per hour. That’s what I was
children. Refraining from blasting Mr. 15B was going doing last night. And I couldn’t summon an ounce of
to require change; “putting him in his place” would courage. Ever since a young man lost control of his
have been a piece of cake. vehicle and hit our family head on in an accident,
I’ve been a skittish passenger (to express it kindly). I
138
tend to scream at odd times, grab the arm rest, and thing.” Failure to act in the small things might leave
brace myself with my feet. I’ve been known to yell, us ill prepared for God’s invitation to participate in
“Watch out!” when there was really nothing much one of his grand epic adventures.
worth seeing. After getting popped in the face with
an air bag, I have completely lost my faith in drivers Thought for today: I eagerly expect and hope that I
and cars staying in their lanes and not causing me a will in no way be ashamed, but will have sufficient
problem. Frankly, I’m a big chicken when it comes to courage so that now as always Christ will be exalted
car trips. in my body, whether by life or by death. For me, to
So it is strangely comforting to me that God isn’t in live is Christ and to die is gain. . . .Whatever happens,
the business of looking for courageous people to conduct yourselves in a manner worthy of the gospel
fulfill his big dreams. According to Erwin McManus in of Christ. Philippians 1:20, 21, 27 NIV
his book Uprising, God is in the business of
transforming the hearts of cowards while calling Thought for tomorrow: Courage is not the absence
them to live courageous lives. He makes a solid case of fear. Whoever needs to summon up courage in
for this perspective. He reminds us that Adam and situations where fear is absent? I hear, “I’m afraid. . .
Eve hid, and Abraham lied. He recalls that Moses ran .I’m worried. . . .I’m anxious…” on a regular basis.
and David deceived. He recounts how Esther was And I think, “Welcome to my world! These feelings
uncertain and Elijah considered suicide. He are not strangers to me either.” The emotional
recollects that John the Baptist doubted, Peter response of fear is not an automatic get‐out‐of‐my‐
denied, and Judas betrayed. responsibility card. It is simply an invitation to be a
I’m no stranger to fear. So I can speak with some person of courage.
authority on the subject when I say that it is possible
to be afraid and not allow that feeling to overtake July 11
you. I really didn’t want to leave Pennsylvania last
night at 8:00 in the evening and drive late at night on Scripture Reading for today: Psalm 50; Proverbs 24;
a crowded highway. It would have been easy to talk Jeremiah 5
Pete into another night’s stay in a fancy hotel. But I
would have known that this insistence was born of Yesterday our community lost someone very near
fear—not faith. I made a different choice in spite of and dear to our hearts. We gathered together,
my fear. Why? Because for me, I believed I needed huddled, and tried to absorb the shock of it all. Later
to express courage even in this small thing. If we in the evening, Peter and I huddled again. Sitting on
came home last night, both of us could get a full our patio, watching the light of day fade, we were
day’s work in the next day. Although that would be comforted by an unusually cool breeze (in our area
great for me, it really was essential for Pete. So I July is usually very hot). We talked quietly about how
chose, with fear and trembling, for the sake of the we practice believing on our “regular” days—those
one I love, to not let fear become my captor. days when trauma is held at bay. And what we
I used to think that there was no safer place to be practice is what shows up on days like today, when
than living in the midst of God’s will. I’m not so cocky we are scorched by suffering. You can’t muster up
nor naïve any more. Although I know God will never faith. Faith is what pops out when stress is applied
leave or forsake me, which is a very safe and with such force that nothing fake or pretend or even
comforting truth, I also know God is willing to go greatly desired can exist under the pressure.
places mere mortals would never dare tread! God So as I sit here on my porch this morning, long
may send me to do things that are inconvenient, before the sun has chosen to join me, I’m reminded
uncomfortable, and sometimes frightening. How will of the value of the “we” in step seven. Removing our
I be prepared for the call to an important feat if I shortcomings is a team effort. And “we” need to
wimp out in the small things (like car trips late at spur one another on. Because when a community
night on busy roads)? That’s why it’s important to and family are assaulted by the unspeakable, it takes
practice the discipline of courage even in the face of a village to survive the day.
fear and especially when it seems like a “small
139
I urge you, brothers, by our Lord Jesus Christ and we know you’re going to make it, no doubt about it.
by the love of the Spirit, to join me in my struggle by 2 Corinthians 1:3‐7 The Message
praying to God for me. Romans 15:30 NIV
The Greek word for struggle in this passage, Thought for tomorrow: Thank God for wounded
sunagonidzomai, means an intense agony, a violent warriors. Thank God for their willingness to continue
struggle, anguish, contending with the enemy, a to fight the good fight in the face of what many
violent fight in a contest. (Rick Renner’s Sparking would consider a mortal wound. Thank God the
Gems from the Greek, June 29) suffering has not been wasted but is even now being
My friends, that’s the battle we face as we seek revealed for what it is: a gift from God, wrapped in
the removal of shortcomings. Did we think it would an incomprehensible package. In recovery, it’s easy
be easy? Our false beliefs, our confused views, our to get self‐focused and self‐pitying. But don’t forget
bad habits, our unhealed hurts, our persistent hang‐ that there is more going on here than you can
ups—all of which hinder our ability to live our God‐ presently discern. It really isn’t all about you; it’s a
created identity—did we think they’d disappear little about you and a lot about your transformation
without a fight? No! We’re at war. into a person God can call into action at a moment’s
But that’s not my central point for today. Today I notice.
want to remind us of why we’re willing to fight the
good fight: because others are depending on us. July 12
They don’t know and we can’t believe it. We’re far
more sure of our need for help than our ability to Scripture Reading for today: Psalm 51; Proverbs 25;
provide it. Jeremiah 6
I have so many unanswered questions this
morning about the loss our community is enduring. “Shortcoming: Anything in our life that keeps us
But one thing I know: our comforters will be the from being our God‐created self; those traits that
ones who’ve fought the fight, persevered through restrict and block our ever‐increasing glory and the
their own experience of suffering, and found transformation process.” 18
themselves (sometimes unwittingly, other times A number of years ago, our daughter played on an
reluctantly, definitely not anticipating this outcome) all‐star softball team with a coach who didn’t believe
completely and utterly prepared to do every good in her ability to pitch. In fact, during practice, he
work the Lord sets before them. didn’t even allow her to practice her pitching.
Through a series of circumstances—and certainly
Thought for today: All praise to the God and Father against the coach’s expectations—our daughter
of our Master, Jesus the Messiah! Father of all ended up pitching an awesome game (practically a
mercy! God of all healing counsel! He comes no hitter) in 106‐degree heat and carrying the team
alongside us when we go through hard times, and to victory. Make no mistake; it shouldn’t have
before you know it, he brings us alongside someone happened. He didn’t want her on the field but his
else who is going through hard times so that we can picks for stardom disappointed. Her greatest
be there for that person just as God was there for us. adversary on the field that day happened to be her
WE have plenty of hard times that come from own coach. I’ve been thrilled with God’s choice of
following the Messiah, but no more so than the good this daughter for our family since the day of her
times of his healing comfort—we get a full measure birth. But I will never forget the day when our
of that, too. When we suffer for Jesus, it works out daughter overcame intense adversity in spite of
for your healing and salvation. If we are treated well, personal suffering and snatched a victory out of
given a helping hand and encouraging word, that almost certain defeat—all for the sake of her team.
also works to your benefit, spurring you on, face
forward, unflinching. Your hard times are also our

hard times. When we see that you’re just as willing
to endure the hard times as to enjoy the good times, 18
Community Publication, p.9. (Available at
www.northstarcommunity.com/step7.htm).
140
It’s been years since I asked her about that day,
but I hope that when she is faced with a difficult “Shortcoming: Anything in our life that keeps us
trial, that memory sustains her. I believe that on that from being our God‐created self; those traits that
day, she lived out her God‐created identity. You restrict and block our ever‐increasing glory and the
could see it in her eyes: no mere mortal was going to transformation process.” 19
keep her ever‐increasing glory from shining through. I love my life. Every day brings with it a new
I’m not talking about the victory, though it was very opportunity. Somewhere I have a file labeled “job
sweet. I’m talking about the willingness to take the description,” but let me tell you, it’s incomplete.
field with her head held high in spite of weeks of Take for instance the times when I get to meet with
humiliation. a family in crisis. On those days, I feel so
All of us have hurtful experiences in our lives. underdressed! Let me explain: those meetings
Sometimes these experiences foster false beliefs and should come with a striped shirt and a whistle. I feel
painful hurts, habits, and hang‐ups. In fact, I consider like a referee. When the in‐fighting heats up, I work
it a miracle when the cruelty of others doesn’t hard to stay “present.” It would be easy to sit there
create a festering wound. and fantasize about what kind of referee uniform
God is in the restoration business. And although this particular battle requires. I’ve decided that I
He cares about healing our pain, there’s more to the prefer the attire of the officials in a tennis match,
story. He wants to remove our shortcomings—no and their accents aren’t bad either. But I digress.
matter how, when, where, or why we acquired Anyway, no matter how I dress for the occasion,
them—because He has big plans for us. when families fight there is always one consistent
On any given day, you might be the most unlikely presence in the room: shortcomings. Actually, there
team member called off the bench and into the are two things that follow along with the family:
game. You may feel that you are not only ill‐ shortcomings and blaming.
prepared but actually the “least of” the players God As a referee, I am not always called upon to give
could have called off the bench. Perhaps some fool my opinion. Some families appreciate feedback, and
taught you that. But I want you to know that you’re others just prefer to duke it out. But if I had the
a bigger fool if you believe them. On any given day, privilege of providing objective feedback, I’d say:
God can choose to work through you. Maybe you “Please, people, pause to prepare.”
have a coach that doesn’t believe in you; so what? If Prepare for what? Prepare for the real battle at
God believes that you are the man or woman for the hand. In the midst of family discord, with fingers
job, what else do you need? Maybe your coach wagging and accusations flying, sometimes we miss
doesn’t even let you practice; so what? I bet there’s the larger picture. This is not about who is right and
another way to practice. My kid came home and who is wrong; the stakes are much higher. Family
threw a couple hundred pitches in the back yard fighting is all about losing our place in God’s story for
with her dad each night. You have work to do. Let us. It’s about restriction and bondage. It’s about
God do his part, and you get busy doing yours! stymied transforming and ever‐decreasing glory.
Frankly, it is unseemly. Why? Because it is petty and
Thought for today: “The work of God is this: to self‐serving to sit around pointing out another’s
believe in the one he has sent.” John 6:29 NIV “problem” without any apparent concern for a
solution. The only shortcomings we need to focus on
Thought for tomorrow: On any given day you do not are our own.
need to believe in yourself if you will choose to
believe in the one who sent you. He will honor this Thought for today: “Then I acknowledged my sin to
faithfulness. you and did not cover up my iniquity. I said, “I will

July 13

Scripture Reading for today: Psalm 52; Proverbs 26; 19
Jeremiah 7 Community Publication, p.9. (Available at
www.northstarcommunity.com).
141
confess my transgressions to the Lord”—and you when one approaches a person holding a position of
forgave the guilt of my sin.” Psalm 32:5 NIV honor, one should approach with respect. In fact, I
think each of us should always be approaching
Thought for tomorrow: I used to click my tongue everyone with respect. That said, I think all of us
and shake my head at the brutality of a family in agree that we have a tendency to approach people
survival mode. I don’t feel that way any longer. I’ve differently.
come to realize that anger is sometimes used to When I’m hanging out at the beach with my family
comfort us in the midst of great suffering. I used to and close friends, I go days without touching a
think that people who were always acting like hairdryer or make‐up brush. Heck, I have been
victims and blaming others were arrogant and known to go days without brushing my hair! But if I
prideful, and that is sometimes true. But a larger were going to visit, say, a queen or king, president or
truth may be that they are people in pain who are dictator, I’d probably get a quick lesson on proper
dealing with their wounds in the only way they know protocol. Someone somewhere would see that I
how. What I’m suggesting is that the road to knew how to approach this dignitary without
recovery is not paved with a spirit of recrimination. It offending (at least I hope so).
won’t get any of us where we truly want to go. So So what exactly are the rules of engagement for
please, people, pause to prepare. Put your blaming one who approaches God? Scripture tells us that we
down and pick up a spirit of humility. Ask God to can approach the throne of grace with confidence,
remove your shortcomings, and trust Him to do but I don’t think that means we should approach
what He needs to do with other people’s God cockily. In fact, most people who encounter a
shortcomings! God‐representative seem to become filled with a
holy fear/respect, according to biblical accounts. And
July 14 why not? Don’t you think it’s amazing when God
sends an emissary across eternity just to meet with
Scripture Reading for today: Psalm 53; Proverbs 27; you?
Jeremiah7 So why not more brouhaha? Know this: step seven
“Ask: Asking God to remove our shortcomings is a privilege, not a punishment. We are the luckiest
acknowledges an important truth: He’s got the ducks in the world to be able to have a meeting with
power and we do not.” 20 God. God Himself invites us to ask Him for stuff and
then promises delivery on our requests that are
A few years ago a group of successful female within His will. We don’t have to win a sports event,
athletes were rewarded for their fine performance walk on the moon, discover the cure for AIDS, or
with a visit to the White House. A brouhaha save a bus full of hostages to meet with the ultimate
occurred when many of the girls showed up in flip ruler of the planet. How cool is that?
flops. Pundits “tisk tisked” over their apparent
disrespect of the President evidenced by their overly Thought for today: “Ask, and it will be given to you;
casual foot apparel. Clearly, these people were not seek and you will find; knock and the door will be
fashion aficionados. Any decent dresser knew that opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he
those shoes were high fashion that year. No one ran who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door
through Target and picked up those shoes! These will be opened. Which of you, if his son asks for
girls paid big bucks for pairs of shoes that looked like bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish,
beachwear. will give him a snake? If you, then though you are
Despite what seems like much ado about nothing, I evil, know how to give good gifts to your children,
believe the pundits had a point (not a particularly how much more will your Father in heaven give good
good one, but we can work with it). I agree that gifts to those who ask him?” Matthew 7:7‐11 NIV

Thought for tomorrow: Is it possible that you have
20
The Christ-Centered 12 step Study Guide, Step 7, A NorthStar taken too lightly this grand privilege?
Community Publication, p.9 (Available at
www.northstarcommunity.com.)
142
July 15
July 16
Scripture Reading for today: Psalm 54; Proverbs 28;
Jeremiah 8 Scripture Reading for today: Psalm 55; Proverbs 29;
Jeremiah 9
“Remove: A gradual, healing, spiritual process of
transformation.” 21 How can I ask this:
Do you really truly believe that God is who He says
I love to read success stories. I particularly he is?
appreciate the stories of strangers I read in self‐help I ask because sometimes we act as if God stands at
magazines or short stories. They’re so neat and tidy. the precipice of eternity, wringing his hands over our
God’s intervention and rescue often are sad states. He is not. He is the God who is and who
communicated in tidy sound bites. They’re the kind will. He is the God who can and who wants to. I pray
of stories you can read in totality while waiting for a that you will take some time today to consider that.
kid to get out of school or waiting to get your teeth Ask the Holy Spirit, “What do you desire for me?” Sit
cleaned. still, and listen for a response. You have access to
As much as I enjoy a quick, inspiring read, I find the God Himself! Utilize it.
real deal far more satisfying. If we knew the people
behind the stories, I think we’d hear a far different, Thought for today: “And we know that in all things
more complex, completely‐resistant‐to‐cliché kind of God works for the good of those who love him, who
story. Real people with real stories of transformation have been called according to his purpose.” Romans
know nothing of quick fixes or magic wands. They 8:28 NIV
know both the joy of victory and the agony of “Being confident of this, that he who began a good
defeat, with both happening sometimes on the same work in you will carry it on to completion until the
day! day of Christ Jesus. . . for it is God who works in you
So as you’re humbly asking God to have his way to will and to act according to his good purpose.”
with you, be gentle with yourself. There are very few Philippians 1:6, 2:13 NIV
true stories of miraculous 150‐pound weight losses
taking place in a week! It’s a process; it takes time. Thought for tomorrow: If you love Him, you can be
assured you were called. If you love Him, you can be
Thought for today: “I have come as Light into the confident that He has begun a good work in you. If
world, so that everyone who believes in Me will not you are confident of this good work, you can be
remain in darkness.” John 12:46 (NASB) assured that He will carry it on to completion. It is
God who does the work, but we must cooperate.
Thought for tomorrow: If you’ve ever lived with Some days I am so befuddled that I can pray only
oppression, bondage, and darkness, you know what I one question, “Lord, if I loved you, if you called me,
mean when I say sometimes the presence of light if I were confident in this calling, if I believed that
can be blinding. I wonder. Do you think that you were at work in me, and that work was good,
sometimes God goes slowly with us for a reason? Is what would I do with my day?” Once you’ve
it possible that too sudden a transformation from followed that line of prayerful reasoning, your day
darkness to light might send us scurrying deeper into will take care of itself. In spite of how you feel, or
our cave of despair? The miracle of healing is no less what you’re worrying over, or even your doubts and
miraculous if it takes time. It may not fit so nicely disbelief, God will take care of the day. I’m reminded
into an essay of 800 words or less; but to those who of the man in scriptures who cried out to Jesus,
experience it, it’s priceless. “Lord, I believe. Help me in my unbelief.” That
prayer had a guaranteed answer.

21
The Christ-Centered 12 Step Study Guide, Step 7, A NorthStar July 17
Community Publication, p.10. (Available at
143
Scripture Reading for today: Psalm 56; Proverbs 30; “The Christ‐centered 12 steps.”
Jeremiah 10 “OK. I hear you. She did that. But I’m talking about
each Sunday now. What’s she doing now?”
“Remove: A gradual, healing, spiritual process of “The Christ‐centered 12 steps!”
transformation. This is not instantaneous. This is not “Oh. Maybe I should just ask your mom.” The
a step of struggle, but one of acceptance followed by curious adult prepared to walk off, convinced that
responsibility. When we believe that God is in the my son simply didn’t understand the question. But,
business of transformation, we cooperate with the just as he was turning to leave, Michael added
process. This process brings the pain of loss. These another comment.
patterns of behavior, although destructive and often “OK, you can ask her. But when you ask her, and
deadly, have been with us for a long time. We can she tells you that she’s teaching on ‘The Christ‐
count on them to produce comfortable, predictable centered 12 steps,’ believe her. She’s not as patient
results. Sometimes this step leaves us filled with self‐ as I am.” Kids always tell the truth!
pity AND it pushes us to move past it. It reminds us
of the consequences of our shortcomings, and calls Thought for today: “But you must not forget this one
out to us to let go of the idolatry of self‐defeating thing, dear friends: A day is like a thousand years to
hurts, habits, and hang‐ups. It calls us to run toward the lord, and a thousand years is like a day. The Lord
the light, and our true God‐created identity.” 22 isn’t really being slow about his promise, as some
I am weary, O God; I am weary and worn out, O God. people think. No, he is being patient for your sake.
I am too stupid to be human, and I lack common He does not want anyone to be destroyed, but wants
sense. I have not mastered human wisdom, nor do I everyone to repent”. 2 Peter 3:8‐9 NLT
know the Holy One. . . Every word of God proves true.
. . give me neither poverty nor riches! Give me just Thought for tomorrow: I’m not a math whiz so I
enough to satisfy my needs. For if I grow rich, I may haven’t figured it up, but in 8½ years, every week
deny you and say, “Who is the Lord?” and if I am too I’ve prepared a message that focused on one of the
poor, I may steal and thus insult God’s holy name. 12 steps. Inevitably we round a corner, and the
Proverbs 30:1‐3, 5, 8‐9 NLT seventh step gets its turn. Why is that? Are we slow
Part of my daily routine includes a seventh‐step learners? Are we doing something wrong? Well, yes,
prayer. Perhaps that’s why I love Proverbs 30! I can sometimes we are slow to learn and, for sure, we’re
so relate to this saying of Agur. Here’s a guy who is doing lots of things wrong. But that’s not why we
exceedingly aware of his shortcomings and confident keep finding ourselves in the middle of a seventh‐
enough in God’s love to ask for what he needs. step moment.
That’s awesome. But some days it is also wearying to We’re here because it’s where God wants us—
acknowledge that part of my daily routine still constantly aware that we’re a work in progress and
requires the need of a seventh‐step prayer! Am I He’s in charge of construction. Fortunately for us,
ever going to find myself “transformed?” God is patient—far more so than me (or Michael).
My children get asked a lot of questions. Curious
acquaintances sometimes seem more comfortable July 18
asking my children about the nature of NorthStar
Community than asking my husband or me. Michael Scripture Reading for today: Psalm 57; Proverbs 31;
was in elementary school when a teacher asked him Jeremiah 11
what his mother spoke about every week, and he
replied, “The Christ‐centered 12 steps.” But you must not forget this one thing, dear
“I know she’s done that, Michael, but what is she friends: A day is like a thousand years to the Lord,
currently speaking about?” and a thousand years is like a day. The Lord isn’t
really being slow about his promise, as some people

think. No, he is being patient for your sake. He does
22
The Christ-Centered 12 Step Study Guide, Step 7, A NorthStar not want anyone to be destroyed, but wants
Community Publication, p.10. (Available at everyone to repent. 2 Peter 3:8‐9 NLT
144
Sometimes we all get worn out with our recovery remember, the Lord’s patience gives people time to
efforts. So let me encourage you with this thought: be saved. 2 Peter 3:10‐15 NLT
where do you think you would be without them?
Some people get weary and worn out and simply set Thought for tomorrow: My son, Scott, will hassle me
them aside. And for a while, nothing particularly about this devotional if I fail to make myself
dramatic seems to happen. Sobriety continues to be perfectly clear. We don’t choose how we live on
the norm; work continues to hum along. The family earth in a desperate attempt to hold out for heaven.
continues on its usual trajectory. But over time, old Life on planet earth is not intended to be suffered
ways of thinking, believing, and behaving begin to through; it is meant to be embraced and found
creep back in, and then life can get bad—fast. abundant (John 10:10). That said, in 2 Peter, Peter
I like to think of it like this. I think eating a big bag himself warns us to not mistake the Lord’s patience
of M&Ms tastes good. But I’ve learned that as soon for inattention or apathy. God cares how we’re
as they’re past the lips and residing on the hips, I living. So as we thank God for His patience with us,
regret my overindulgence. I get tired of hitting the let us not forget that He is patient with a purpose.
pavement every morning come rain or shine for my He’s giving us time to work our program.
four‐mile walk. Sometimes in the evening I’d prefer
being a couch potato to hitting the floor for my ab July 19
workout. I’ve even been known to get bored with my
daily quiet time routine. But as I age, I’ve come to Scripture Reading for today: Hebrews 1 and 2;
understand that saying “no” to what feels good is Jeremiah 12
actually saying “yes” to God’s best. Weary and worn
out is not a good enough excuse to check out; it’s an It has been suggested that the book of Hebrews
opportunity to test the strength of our character! was written “to demonstrate the wisdom of
I like the idea that I’m taking care of my body so following Christ and the foolishness of looking
that when my grandchildren arrive, I’m going to be elsewhere for salvation. Hebrews was written to
able to keep up with them! I appreciate the fact that encourage Jewish believers who were being severely
years of daily quiet time results in the occasional persecuted. Many of the Jewish Christians of the
God‐insight that fills me with awe. I love how it feels first century thought about returning to the Jewish
to end my day with a sigh of satisfaction rather than faith.” 23
a moan of guilt, remorse, and shame. Enough said. If Can you relate? Some days it just seems easier to
I haven’t wearied you too much with all these words, stick with the familiar. If you have some time, give
go and seize the day! some consideration to what is familiar in your life –
but not effective. Just because it’s comfortable does
Thought for today: But the day of the Lord will come not mean it is comforting.
as unexpectedly as a thief. Then the heavens will The seventh step is NOT about sticking with the
pass away with a terrible noise, and the very familiar while we wait for God to zap us with a new
elements themselves will disappear in fire, and the perspective – absent all our annoying little defects of
earth and everything on it will be found to deserve character. This step challenges us to ACT.
judgment. Since everything around us is going to be A – take action. What is the shortcoming that you
destroyed like this, what holy and godly lives you are most aware of? Act against it; don’t just suffer
should live, looking forward to the day of God and through it. Are you annoyed with your financial
hurrying it along. On that day, he will set the mismanagement, and do you believe that you suffer
heavens on fire, and the elements will melt away in with the defect of irresponsible spending? Then ACT
the flames. But we are looking forward to the new on that conviction – go to any lengths. Set up a
heavens and new earth he has promised, a world budget (a realistic one) and decide to live within it.
filled with God’s righteousness. And so, dear friends, Get help, utilize your community resources.
while you are waiting for these things to happen,
make every effort to be found living peaceful lives
23
that are pure and blameless in his sight. And The Life Recovery Bible, copyright 1998 by Tyndale House
Publishers, Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. P. 1577.
145
C – commit to the process. It’s not enough to One thing is for sure: my brothers seemed to have
daydream about a time when you will no longer a much clearer picture of reality. None of them
have your plaguing deficiency. Commit to the belief displayed any indication that all A’s were a
that God is going to remove it – and begin today to requirement at the Jones household. I could have
practice what it’s going to be like to live without it. noticed the fact that no one freaked out when they
T – think. Pause to prepare. Ask yourself – what if came home with a variety of grades on their report
God’s already removed this particular shortcoming, card. But I didn’t. I was stuck in the place of, “Don’t
and I haven’t noticed? Habits are habitual for a confuse me with the facts. I know what I believe.”
reason! We’ve practiced them for a long time. I learned this in a circuitous way. As our children
Perhaps you don’t need that particular dependency were growing up, I tried to impress upon the
any longer – and you don’t know it because you’re perfectionists‐in‐training that it was OK to not
so busy continuing to practice it! Maybe you don’t achieve academic perfection. I tried to teach them
“need” to over‐spend anymore – who knows? Today that sometimes other priorities would supersede
might just be the day you’re ready to accept God’s their studying. So it came as a great shock to my
gift of freedom. system when one of my precious children seemed to
think that I expected grade perfection. Truly, it was
Thought for today: Since he himself (Jesus) has gone an “aha” moment.
through suffering and testing, he is able to help us Somehow, it brought to my mind in perfect clarity
when we are being tested. Hebrews 2:18 NLT the many ways my own parents had not pushed me
to perform, and it made me painfully aware that this
Thought for tomorrow: I know that you may believe drive to compete, compare, exceed expectations and
(with good reason) that you are unable to stand up succeed at all costs lived deep within me; it was not
against your defects of character and win. I am a system imposed upon me.
challenging you to remember that you don’t have to In truth, all of us are like this. We all have belief
do it alone. Jesus himself is our advocate; ask Him systems that have a tendency to get out of whack.
for the help you need.
Thought for today: There is a way that seems right
July 20 to a man, but in the end it leads to death. Proverbs
16:25 NIV
Scripture Reading for today: Hebrews 3 and 4;
Jeremiah 13 Thought for tomorrow: The problem with false
beliefs (other than that they’re false) is that they
Shhhh. This is a well kept secret. Memories aren’t determine our steps and lead us down paths we
perfect. In fact, sometimes they are downright were never intended to trod. If I had not marched
distorted. Let me give you an example. When I was a through life thinking that my parents were
kid, I used to think my parents expected me to make responsible for my need to succeed and my desire to
straight A’s. I now realize with the clarity that only please through performing, I would have never
20/20 hindsight can bring that I then set about encountered my own personal shortcoming of
convincing myself that my belief was true. The only perfectionism. I could have gone through my entire
problem with this scenario is that it wasn’t true. life believing a lie and failing to accept personal
Here’s how it happened. Once I brought home a responsibility for my own believing. I am very
report card that had a B in gym, and I think my dad thankful that “it is God who is at work in you, both to
said something like, “Couldn’t you do any better will and to work for His good pleasure.” Philippians
than this?” He was kidding. I should have known 2:13 (NASB) I’m glad I’m not left to my own devices,
that, but I was a little distracted going about revising or else I could be in big trouble!
memories to suit my view of reality. Truth is, my dad
was very open about his own academic travails, and
he seemed OK with not being the perfect student.

146
July 21 and prepare. All have sinned and fallen short—not
just those clowns at the top!
Scripture Reading for today: Hebrews 5 and 6;
Jeremiah 14 July 22

Yesterday we touched on the possibility that our Scripture Reading for today: Hebrews 7 and 8;
confused memories and false beliefs might be Jeremiah 15
contributing to our stubborn and seemingly
resistant‐to‐remove shortcomings. After all, if our Do you remember my story from yesterday? I told
confusion and false believing has resulted in our you about a friend who was let go by his company.
failure to recognize our shortcomings, we’re My point in telling the story was to illustrate the
probably not humbly asking for their removal. So dangers of becoming a person who never notices
they’re still wreaking havoc with or without our their own shortcomings. The good news for my
acknowledgement. friend is that the story doesn’t end on such a sour
It’s like the guy I know who lost his job and is still note.
wondering what happened. You see, my friend He had a tough time getting another job until he
always assumed that he was the smartest tool in the was interviewed by a guy who could see beyond the
shed at work, and the rest of those guys and gals façade of arrogance. During the interview process,
were a few bricks short of a load. So‐and‐so did not the interviewer asked my friend if he could offer him
understand this‐and‐that. What a bunch of clowns! some feedback. My friend accepted the offer.
He was sarcastic and annoying and impatient. He My friend was told that although his qualifications
embarrassed people in company meetings and was were marvelous, his people skills were in obvious
unapologetic about his disdain for upper need of improvement. The interviewer confessed
management. So it came as quite a shock when the that he’d love to have his expertise but was
company let him go. Amazed at how they could fire concerned about his ability to work as a team player.
the most valuable player on the team, he confidently (Certainly, this was not new information; but the
predicted their swift and sudden demise. He’s still difference was that my friend desperately needed a
scratching his head at their viability, increased job, so he listened.)
productivity, and apparent seamless transition after A deal was made. The company representative
his unceremonious exit. agreed to hire my friend on a trial basis. My friend
agreed to weekly feedback sessions with the
Thought for today: “Who can say, ‘I have kept my understanding that he was going to need to make
heart pure; I am clean and without sin.’” Proverbs some serious changes to earn a position with this
20:9 NIV company.
For the next six months, both boss and trial
Thought for tomorrow: My friend doesn’t seem to employee worked hard together. It was humbling;
have any awareness of his own “lack”—his lack of some days it felt humiliating. The boss gave specific
connectedness to others, lack of awareness of how feedback and spelled out concrete alternatives that
others perceive him, lack of humility, lack of the trainee was expected to achieve.
sensitivity, and lack of empathy. That’s a problem. “Teresa, at first, I was really bad at receiving
He may be right about being a sharp tool. He may feedback and implementing change. But I got better
have been the smartest guy in his company, but he at it.”
wasn’t wise. And his propensity to revise history by “Why do you suppose you improved? Wasn’t it
making himself a hero and those around him goats hard to hear your shortcomings listed every single
did not serve him or anyone else well. Who can say week?”
that they’ve got it all together? No one. But if “Yeah. But I also knew that my boss was sacrificing
perchance we find ourselves getting a little too big for me. I went six months with many interviews and
for our britches and our heads don’t seem to fit not a single job offer. He didn’t have to take me on
easily through doorways, perhaps it is time to pause as a project; he could have just passed me over. The
147
other thing that was really great about this was the The last two devotionals have focused on a guy
way he gave feedback. I could just tell that even who had trouble facing shortcomings, eventually
when I did something he didn’t like, he never acted became willing, accepted feedback, and experienced
disappointed in me. He always just treated it like it the joy of life transformation. I write about him in
was another opportunity to learn. Eventually, I short little snippets, but all this morphing took place
believed him. Now, even at home, I seek out and over a long period of time.
appreciate feedback. This is the best thing that ever More from my friend who was willing to
happened to me in my whole life. I am a different experience morphing: “For a long time, I kept asking
person today because one person was willing to tell my manager, ‘What do you want me to do?’ and
me the truth about myself and give me a chance to sometimes he had an answer. But those weren’t the
change.” real opportunities to learn. I came to appreciate the
Guess what? The boss retired and gave his recruit‐ times when he spoke more about who he wanted
in‐need‐of‐feedback his job. By all reports, everyone me to be and less about what he wanted me to do. I
is pleased with the results. didn’t get it at first, but telling me what to do was
merely behavior management. Teaching me how to
Thought for today: For whoever exalts himself will ‘be’ a man of wisdom, discernment, and integrity
be humbled, and whoever humbles himself will be provided me transferable skills.”
exalted. Matthew 23:12 NIV “Like what?” I asked.
“Well, like the time I lost a big client because I got
Thought for tomorrow: I know it is natural to dread aggravated with what I thought was a stupid request
the exposing of shortcomings. It’s true that not for a service they didn’t really need. My boss didn’t
everyone has the skill set, the wisdom, and the teach me how to not fly off the handle (which
patience to do what this boss did. But here’s the wouldn’t have worked anyway), instead, he poked
thing. More people would be able to be a blessing in and prodded to help me understand why I behaved
this area if they would take the time to walk through the way I did.”
the twelve steps. I’m proud of my buddy who finally “What did you learn?”
was willing to take a look at his “lacking,” but I am “For one thing, I learned that the client was
awestruck by the sacrifice of the guy who hired him. interfering with my desire to feel successful. I get
Talk about a person living large! Wow! This man angry with people who interfere with my goal to
truly lived the abundant life. He gave up a chunk of succeed. I was more anxious that I was going to fail
time every week, and for what? On the surface it than I was angry that the client was making a foolish
appears he trained an employee. But in the larger request. Then, I tried to justify my bad behavior
view, he did far more than that: he saved a man. It because I thought making a mistake was the same
came as no surprise when I learned that he was a thing as admitting that I was a mistake.”
committed believer in recovery. His day job involved “Hmmm.”
running a mid‐size company, but his passion was “So what I learned is that my anger was more a
throwing lifelines to those in desperate need of a symptom of my shortcomings, including fear of
second chance. Wasn’t it great that he didn’t just failing, the need for constant approval (I thought if I
hand the guy a job? If he had, failure would have was really smart people would value me), and fears
been the inevitable outcome. Instead, he offered of rejection and punishment, which all led to a
someone a chance to become the person who God tendency on my part to reject and to punish.
dreamed of when He was creating them. Anyway, I found a lot of shortcomings and ironically,
none of them had much to do with anger
July 23 management. I surely needed to manage my anger,
but the anger was more of a symptom than a root
Scripture Reading for today: Hebrews 9 and 10; cause. As long as I just dealt with the symptom,
Jeremiah 16 change wasn’t happening. I was just trying to control
my behavior.”
148
“Wow. It sounds like you and your supervisor experience went well, but it could have gone sour
really worked hard at ferreting out the root issues.” fast.
“Yeah, we did. And that’s how I acquired Initially when the mentor told his potential mentor
transferable skills. I have learned so much about candidate that he came off as a person who could
myself that I think it has helped me understand not not succeed as a team player, the response was
only myself, but others too. So I don’t need to run to defensive.
my mentor all the time (although at one time that “Well, that’s just because I’ve never been on a
was essential) to tell me what to do; he taught me team worthy of my loyalty.” The young man huffed
principles that guide me in a wide range of life and puffed and provided examples of the
experiences. If I’m living like the man I was created inadequacy of his past teammates.
to ‘be,’ I’m usually able to figure out the next right Relationship is a beautiful thing—especially one
thing to ‘do.’” that has had the gifts of time, experience, and
context. All that huffing and puffing did not dissuade
Thought for today: “Humble yourselves before the the older man from his viewpoint because he knew
Lord and he will lift you up.” James 4:10 NIV the deal; he had history with this guy. The soon‐to‐
“If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, be mentor utilized his past relationship experience,
who gives generously to all without finding fault, and and pointed out (respectfully but candidly) an
it will be given to him.” James 1:5 NIV opportunity that this fellow had at church to
participate on a team—and blew it. It was a
Thought for tomorrow: Numerous discussions with beautiful example because it was on point, and both
my friend taught me that even though most people men knew it. Clearly the problem on this team had
would have concluded he was an arrogant so‐and‐ been with this young man, and the “coach” had the
so, the truth of the matter was that he was a person goods. But the message was delivered without
overcome by shame. That’s why he couldn’t tolerate blaming and shaming; it was a kind, gentle, accurate
a single hint of “lacking;” it was too painful. At his recounting of an example that snuck past this man’s
core, he thought he was broken; his defense was defenses and hit the heart hard.
constantly accusing others of the thing he most That’s why community is so valuable. It’s hard to
feared about himself. I’ll write more on how he bluff your way around someone who has known you
overcame this affliction tomorrow. But for now, ask for twenty years. AA has experienced years of
yourself: could this be my problem too? success with alcoholics helping fellow alcoholics get
sober. They attribute their success to God and
July 24 community. The old adage that “it takes one to know
one” is an old adage for a reason! Shared suffering
Scripture Reading for today: Hebrews 11 and 12; makes it easier to relate to and understand one
Jeremiah 17 another.

I suppose some of you are marveling at a boss who Thought for today: “As iron sharpens iron, so one
could be so helpful to a young man in need of, to man sharpens another.” Proverbs 27:17 NIV
quote Dr. Phil, “a relationship rescue.” Would it help
you to know that these two men were not Thought for tomorrow: Tomorrow we will continue
strangers? Both attended the same church and had a our discussion on the “how‐tos” that this young man
history of shared values and mutual respect. Does practiced as he experienced life transformation. But
that enlighten the context of the story (see the past make note of this: he probably could not have done
few devotionals)? this alone—even with the help of a lot of good
So when the man asked for a job, he was asking reading materials. It took community. It was a “we”
someone who knew him. When the potential effort. God used people with skin on to represent
employer offered feedback, he did it in the context Him, and I believe this older gentleman did an
of a trusting relationship. The feedback was awesome job of being God’s ambassador. I won’t
meaningful and accurate. As you know, the take time to go into all the details, but even the
149
mentor asked for mentoring throughout this And he couldn’t offer an excuse or justify his goof.
process. This was a team effort all the way. How are He simply had to confess, “I did this wrong.”
you doing in building community for yourself? He also had to live “as if” he was humble and
contrite of spirit, so he had to practice valuing
July 25 others. This was particularly taxing after years of
undervaluing others in a misguided attempt to
Scripture Reading for today: Hebrews 13; Jeremiah elevate self worth. So his mentor made him practice,
18 and 19 practice, practice. One assignment involved going to
his local grocery store chain and asking if he could
Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a huge bag his own groceries (a store noted for their
crowd of witnesses to the life of faith, let us strip off excellent customer service). This is a huge no‐no in
every weight that slows us down, especially the sin this company. He asked, the bagger explained that
that so easily trips us up. And let us run with he could get in trouble for such a practice, and the
endurance the race God has set before us. Hebrews guy had to watch as the bagger bagged. He thanked
12:1 NLT the bagger twice for his service. He ultimately
It’s one thing to recognize our shortcomings; it’s enjoyed that assignment so much that he still loves
quite another to experience their removal. This expressing appreciation to baggers, and he never
friend of mine that we’ve been learning about for tries to bag his own groceries in a fit of impatience.
several days had to humble himself; he had to He regularly humbles himself in this way by allowing
believe that change was necessary—for him. He had another to serve him, and he takes the time to
to learn how to process information differently. No recognize this blessing for what it is and express
longer could he rely on his old standby belief that he appropriate appreciation.
was right and the world was wrong. He had to be Another practical assignment that the boss gave
willing not only to acknowledge his fear of failure, him was to ask people questions that he knew would
but to recognize it for what it was: an indication of net him a resounding, “No!” response and to accept
faith gone awry. Although he claimed to be a that response with grace. This guy had a nasty habit
committed believer, his fear of failure was really of never taking “no” for an answer. For example, he
revealing that he trusted far more in his ability to had him go to a fast food drive‐through window and
perform perfectly, avoid mistakes, and win the ask if they gave away free food. When they said,
approval of others than he trusted in the God who “No!” he was instructed to thank them for
saves. (Who needs saving if they’re perfect?) Let’s considering his question and drive off, but he had to
pause on that one. Fear of failure sounds so sad, but make sure he waved to the guys as he drove past the
it is really quite arrogant. It’s implying we think that window. This was pretty embarrassing, but it was
with enough effort we can live without wrongdoing! funny.
(Wouldn’t that make us God?) And this obsession In a variety of ways, the awesome mentor was
with winning the approval of others: isn’t that trying to get his student to think differently, perceive
idolatry? Wasn’t he caring more about what mere more accurately, behave more consistently with his
mortals thought of him than of God? stated core beliefs, and ultimately experience his
Honestly, when carefully presented with plenty of faith genuinely‐‐not just as a concept, but as a daily
examples for support, he didn’t even try to deny his living experience.
false beliefs. But acknowledgement alone does not
produce transformation. Thought for today: And now, dear brothers and
So what did he do? He began living an “as if” life: sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is
“as if” he knew he was going to make mistakes and true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely,
“as if” a mistake did not mean he was broken—just and admirable. Think about things that are excellent
in need of learning something new. His boss actually and worthy of praise. Keep putting into practice all
had him make a mistake and then have to confess you learned and received from me – everything you
his wrongdoing—nothing major, just little things. heard from me and saw me doing. Then the God of
peace will be with you. Philippians 4:8‐9 NLT
150

Thought for tomorrow: Sometimes we sit around Thought for today: “Trust in the Lord with all your
waiting for God to remove our shortcomings. We heart; do not depend on your own understanding.
measure that by how we feel. We may see that our Seek his will in all you do, and he will direct your
fear of failure means that we avoid our own paths. Don’t be impressed with your own wisdom.
inadequacies by pointing out the shortcomings of Instead, fear the Lord and turn your back on evil.
others. We ask God to remove our judgmental spirit, Then you will gain renewed health and vitality.”
and we wait to feel generous and gracious toward Proverbs 3:5‐8 NIV
others. If that’s your idea of step seven, pull up a
comfortable chair, because you’re going to be sitting Thought for tomorrow: I hate to say this, but it’s
for a long, long time. Philippians says instead to true. Sometimes we get all cocky just because we
discipline your thoughts, put them into practice, and can explain a step or we can speak with some degree
then you will feel the God of peace with you. Hey, of understanding about topics related to our hurts,
He’s been there all along. But it’s only as we walk in habits, and hang‐ups. Cool. But in order to really live,
faith that we find ourselves experiencing the fruit of we must be a people who actually act on what we
faith. So what do you believe intellectually that you learn. The writer of Ecclesiastes didn’t figure out a
need to put into practice and act ‘as if’ today? lot, but he did get this: what we do come to
understand, we must act on.
July 26 There’s a lot about life we will never understand.
But understand this: we are responsible for what we
Scripture Reading for today: Jeremiah 20; Psalm 58; do understand. So if you know of a particular
Ecclesiastes 1 shortcoming in your own life, you know enough. It
doesn’t matter how it got there or even why it’s
“I just don’t think I’m up to it; with my limitations, been so resistant to removal. What matters is that
I think you’d be better off asking someone else.” you know that one thing. Now, you can humbly ask
“I want to forgive, but not just yet‐‐I’ve got more God to remove it. Next, you can begin to live “as if”
to figure out.” He has. Then you can continue on down the road to
“I just can’t accept God’s forgiveness. I’m very recovery. Will you, just for today, choose to live an
confused.” “as if” life? “As if”…you knew with certainty that you
It’s not just the proud and arrogant who struggle can’t live the abundant life independently of God.
with the twelve steps. Sometimes the broken and “As if”…the abundant life is with you as long as
downtrodden fall into a trap of inaction too. In the you’re stepping as God speaks. Maybe there’s a lot
Old Testament book of Ecclesiastes, the writer (who you don’t know; but I’ll bet there are a few things
many believe was Solomon, the guy who asked God you know that you’re not practicing. You can
to make him wise) searches for the meaning of life. I practice cherishing and respecting your spouse. You
hate to spoil a good story, but he never finds it. In can practice parenting your children by being fully
fact, after all his searching he concludes: “Here now present: not neglecting, abusing, or shaming them.
is my final conclusion: Fear God and obey his You can stop taking things that aren’t yours. You can
commands, for this is everyone’s duty.” Ecclesiastes work a full day and not cheat your employer by
12:13 NIV shaving your hours or slacking off when no one is
I love puzzles, I enjoy observing people, I spend a watching. You can honor your employees by paying
good bit of every day asking God to show me the them a fair wage. You can stop spending more than
next right thing to share on Sunday mornings that you make. You can find a way to share what you
will encourage people to seek God and find the have with others. What else do you know to do that
abundant life. I actually enjoy living a life that many you’re not practicing? While we’re humbly asking,
would think is rather serious. I like thinking. I don’t let’s not forget to act ‘as if’.
like checking my brain at the door and just rushing
through life. That said, it’s not enough to just learn July 27
things. God wants us to live what we’ve learned.
151
Scripture Reading for today: Jeremiah 21; Psalm 59; God. For everyone who exalts himself will be
Ecclesiastes 2 humbled, and he who humbles himself will be
exalted.” Luke 18:10‐14 NIV
Have you ever made an amends to someone you My friend graciously allows me to share her story
deeply wronged? Yikes! It’s hard stuff. I must because she learned something in the process that
confess, sometimes the only reason I choose to do both of us think is worth sharing. “You know, it was
no harm is because I really get tired of having to terrible when I was the ‘bad girl’. It felt great when
make the same old amends. I find serious amends‐ all of a sudden I was getting a lot of affirmation for
making to be a wonderful deterrent to future bad working an intentional recovery program. But in
acts. hindsight, I think I never experienced true humility
So it surprised me when my girlfriend, who had with my first stab at recovery. I think I lived in
just made an amends to a previous husband and humiliation and then found comfort in false pride. I
child (both of whom she left for her Internet lover), thought I had it all together.” She was a modern day
made a startling confession. It seems that her tax collector who became a Pharisee, only to be
marriage of five years (to the Internet beau) is in slammed down by relapse. She thought she had
trouble; she’s embroiled in a torrid affair with a co‐ learned so much that she was immune to messing
worker. It is not the affair that startles me; it’s the up. She was wrong. Knowledge alone isn’t enough.
affair in light of her recent amends. I listened to my Humiliation isn’t the same as true humility.
friend’s fifth step; she did a great job. Her eighth‐
step list of harms done and subsequent amends was Thought for today: “My people are destroyed for a
sincere. Who would want to endure a sequel of lack of knowledge.” Hosea 4:6 NIV
sorrow that adultery inevitably causes? And yet This is true, but sometimes we’re destroyed by a
someday she will, because she is repeating the false sense of security when we learn some cool new
pattern that she so painfully acknowledged a few stuff. It’s not the knowledge that frees us from our
short months ago. When she went through the last hurts, habits, and hang‐ups; it’s allowing God to have
affair and its disastrous aftermath, she became an his way with us. It’s when we take what we know
outcast in her community. After entering recovery, and apply it.
many saw her as a poster child for the twelve‐step “The fear of the Lord is the beginning of
process. In a way, her life was the epitome of a story knowledge, but fools despise wisdom and discipline.”
found in the gospel of Luke—sort of a one‐woman Proverbs 1:7 NIV
play. Knowledge without respect for God, knowledge
“Two men went up to the temple to pray, one a absent of the wisdom and discipline to apply what
Pharisee (these were ancient‐day poster children we know—is just another way to feel good about
who assumed and presumed that they followed all ourselves without truly becoming our God‐created
of God’s laws perfectly) and the other a tax collector. identity.
(Typically a tax collector was a Jewish citizen who
was hired by the Roman oppressors to collect taxes Thought for tomorrow: The seventh step doesn’t
from their fellow Jews—taxes no one felt they owed. have much room for faux humility. The humiliation
Oftentimes tax collectors were unscrupulous in their that accompanies public wrongdoing does not
collecting—skimming money and cheating both Jews necessarily translate into humility, and neither does
and Romans alike). The Pharisee stood up and over‐reliance on our own ability to effectively work a
prayed about himself: ‘God, I thank you that I am recovery program. The Pharisee messed up when he
not like other men‐‐robbers, evildoers, adulterers—or assumed that he was right and without shortcoming.
even like this tax collector. I fast twice a week and The tax collector was forgiven for his shortcomings
give a tenth of all I get.’ But the tax collector stood because he humbly asked, but that doesn’t
at the distance. He would not even look up to necessarily mean all is right with his world. I hope
heaven, but beat his breast and said, ‘God, have that the tax collector took his newfound forgiveness
mercy on me, a sinner.’ I tell you that this man, and used it wisely. Maybe he quit his job as a tax
rather than the other, went home justified before collector. Perhaps he kept the job, but made sure he
152
was ruthlessly honest in executing his duties. I hope,
in spite of his “less than” feelings, that the lowly tax Yesterday I had a weird experience that I want to
collector began to live an “as if” life—doing the next share with you. Someone gave me some very
right thing. How about you? Where are you in the helpful, constructive feedback, and I took absolutely
process? no offense! Imagine that! During my devotional
study time this morning, I processed through why I
July 28 was so willing to hear someone speak to me about a
shortcoming and so eager to respond to correction.
Scripture Reading for today: Jeremiah 22; Psalm 60; (Ask those who know me well; this is not my typical
Ecclesiastes 3 response.)
I think the main reason has much less to do with
I’m pretty sure none of us will get to the place me than it did with the person speaking to me. With
where “boasting” is going to become a healthy part this individual I feel accepted, secure, and
of our daily living. significant. I believe this is a safe relationship. I am
convinced this person loves me for who I am, not
Thought for today: “This is what the Lord says, ‘Let what I may or may not be able to do for them.
not the wise man boast of his wisdom, or the strong This thought led me to a moment of clarity.
man boast of his strength, or the rich man boast of The more I come to believe what God says about
his riches, but let him who boasts boast about this: how He sees me—as his child, friend, one with Him
that he understands me and knows me, that I am the in spirit, a saint, redeemed and forgiven, complete in
Lord who exercises kindness, justice and Christ, free from condemnation, established,
righteousness on earth, for in these I delight,’ anointed and sealed by God, a citizen of heaven, not
declares the Lord.” Jeremiah 9:23‐24 NIV given to a spirit of fear, one who can find grace and
mercy in time of need, chosen and appointed to
Thought for tomorrow: In light of this passage, bear fruit, a minister of reconciliation, etc.—the
humility is a commodity that is easy to acquire. God more willing I will be to hear the Holy Spirit speak to
reminds us that nothing is “boast worthy” except me about a shortcoming. I will be eager to respond
those times when we know that we know that we with humility.
know—who God is and what He’s up to. How
confident do you feel in your ability to understand Thought for today: “Therefore, since we have a
the thoughts and intentions of Holy God? great high priest who has gone through the heavens,
Hmmm…me too! There’s a lot I don’t understand Jesus the Son of God, let us hold firmly to the faith
about God’s ways either! we profess. For we do not have a high priest who is
I’ve been reviewing some old messages that I unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we
taught last year on the nature of love. In spite of my have one who has been tempted in every way, just as
reluctance to listen to myself, I found one sentence we are – yet was without sin. Let us then approach
in all that talking that I actually loved, “We are the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may
limited in so many ways, but God is limitless in His receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of
capacity to help us.” need.” Hebrews 4:14‐16 NIV
To think that God is limitless in both His desire and
capacity to help us is truly something worth boasting Thought for tomorrow: It is helpful for me (and I
about. We serve a God who loves us and is more hope for you too) to be reminded that step seven is
interested in helping us than He is in what He can attainable not because of our efforts but entirely
get from us. How cool is that? because God is able to deliver on His promises. It is
who God is that allows us to approach this step with
July 29 confidence (God‐confidence).

Scripture Reading for today: Jeremiah 23; Psalm 61;
Ecclesiastes 4
153
Thought for today: In Luke 4:14‐21, Jesus quotes a
passage from the Old Testament when he tells us his
mission in life: “God’s Spirit is on me: he’s chosen me
July 30 to preach the Message of good news to the poor,
sent me to announce pardon to prisoners and
Scripture Reading for today: Jeremiah 24; Psalm 62; recovery of sight to the blind, to set the burdened
Ecclesiastes 5 and battered free…”

My brother is an experienced hunter, and he can Thought for tomorrow: Since I’m a Jones by birth, I
spot things in the woods that novices like me miss. spent time in the woods as a child, learning how to
He learned how to track things down; he studied handle firearms and even a bow and arrow. I chose
nature, and he practiced his skills. not to hone that skill set as an adult. I’ve played my
I’ve got another brother who is an awesome tennis fair share of tennis, but I’ve not committed myself to
player. He can anticipate a cross‐court backhand and become a devotee of the game. I’m just happy to
actually return it. He learned how to track down keep my husband moving from side to side and am
tennis balls and return them effectively by studying thrilled when once in awhile I win a game or two.
the game and practicing his skills. I’ve been up in lots of airplanes with my dad over the
My dad is a pilot. He has been able to track down years, but everyone would be in trouble if I had to fly
airports and identify troubling weather indicators in one. Acquiring a skill set that enables to to love God
order to fly many miles for more years than he cares and others is not a skill set that I can choose to opt
to count‐‐safely. He did this by becoming a perpetual out on. Because it is such a vital part of life, it’s also a
student of flight and by practicing his flying skills. place where more than a few shortcomings can lurk.
Along the way, I am sure each of them If you’re uncertain about the nature of your
experienced times of poverty – times when Bob shortcomings, even with a month of devotionals on
couldn’t track down a covey of pheasant, Tim the topic, you may want to do some careful analysis
struggled with his serve, and Dad struggled to learn of your love life. How are you loving God, others,
how to fly a new and different kind of aircraft. In and self?
order to get to the top of their “game”—regardless
of the kind of game—these guys had some July 31
shortcomings that had to be removed.
I am neither an experienced hunter, awesome Scripture Reading for today: Jeremiah 25; Psalm 63;
tennis player, or gifted pilot. And that’s OK. Ecclesiastes 6
But all of us are called to become experienced at
love. That’s a game we’re created to participate in. As we conclude this devotional study on the
How do I know this? Because God said so when he seventh step, it is my prayer that God has guided
told us the greatest commandment of all was to love you to new understandings of yourself. I know He’s
Him, others, and self. Hunting, tennis playing, and been gentle and patient, because that is His way. I’ll
flying are good things. But the best thing—the bet He has been persistent, because His dreams for
essential thing—is love. you are big and your need to fulfill them is great.
Along the way, whether we are loving God, self, Although He loves us just the way we are, He loves
and others in the woods, on the courts or in the air, us too much to leave us there—especially if our lives
at home or at work—wherever we find ourselves have any plaguing hurts, habits, or hang‐ups. I hope
living and loving‐‐we’re going to discover some you’ll take some time today and reflect back on this
shortcomings in ourselves. The good news in all this month’s devotional materials. Pray earnestly for
is that we can become students of love, and we can God’s Spirit to quicken your mind and heart to those
practice our skill sets. The best news of all is that \ truths He wants you to hone in on as you continue to
we don’t have to rely solely on our ability to learn grow up in your salvation.
and our agility on the court.

154
Thought for today: Choose your favorite verses from Thought for today: “Fools mock at making amends
this month’s study, put them on index cards, or write for sin, but goodwill is found among the upright.”
them in your journal. List them on the inside cover of Proverbs 14:9 NIV
your Bible, or begin your own personal indexed
notebook of favorite passages you want to apply in Thought for tomorrow: You’re not going to want to
your life. miss this step. Some of the topics we’re going to
cover include: defining “harm” (sometimes we’re
Thought for tomorrow: Tomorrow begins a new ignorant of our harmful ways), empathy, willingness,
study series. If you have any questions for me before and even the simple‐but‐profound, three‐letter
we proceed, please email me at word, “all.” We’re going to talk about sins of
AskTeresa@hotmail.com. I can’t wait for step commission and omission. We’re going to dig deep
eight—how about you? into the amends process. I can’t wait to get started!

STEP 8 We made a list of all persons we had August 2
harmed and became willing to make amends to
them all. Scripture Reading for today: Ecclesiastes 8, 9, and
10
August 1
In step eight, you’re going to make a list of all the
Scripture Reading for today: Jeremiah 26; Psalm 64; people you’ve harmed and you’re going to become
Ecclesiastes 7 willing to make amends to each and every one of
them. I know that it is natural for you to desire to
Our youngest son is learning how to drive. I digress on this point and distract yourself with
suspect he’d like to skip the “learning” portion of thoughts of the offensiveness of others towards you.
this process and jump right into the “driving without Don’t digress. Hang in with the process.
parental units in the car” experience. Fortunately for The old adage, “nothing changes if nothing
him (whether he appreciates this or not) we are changes,” is a great principle to apply at this point.
experienced at the fine art of teenage driving, and Previously, most of us have preferred to ruminate
we’re making him learn before we allow him to over the wrongs others have committed against us.
leave the driveway unsupervised. Scripture turns us around and points us in a different
I wonder if you’ve glanced at step eight and desire direction. Before you read the verse that will make
to skip it as badly as Michael desires to skip past the this point painfully obvious, I want you to pause to
“learning” driver stage to the “permitted” driver prepare. In your heart of hearts, you desperately
stage. Wouldn’t it be less painful to just say to desire to be turned around. Your life has…some
yourself, “Hey, mistakes were made; I won’t do that limitations…unfulfilled dreams…painful points…and
again. Let’s allow bygones to be bygones, we’ll just you’d love to find your freedom from these plaguing
forgive and forget, and I’ll just skip this little step. I’ll problems, right? If so, you’re going to have to decide
start all relationships in the future with a clean slate to be willing to be turned. It’s not comfortable or
and wipe from my memory all the relationship boo convenient, but turn you must—if you ever hope to
boos of my past.” find the abundant life Jesus spoke about.
Forget it.
This step is more than necessary; it is essential. Thought for today: Jesus says, “This is how I want
You can’t get to the abundant life you desire (and you to conduct yourself in these matters. If you enter
God has planned for you) until you deal with all the your place of worship and, about to make an
messiness of past broken relationships. offering, you suddenly remember a grudge a friend
Now let’s get started. has against you, abandon your offering, leave
immediately, go to this friend and make things right.
Then and only then, come back and work things out
with God. Or say you’re out on the street and an old
155
enemy accosts you. Don’t lose a minute. Make the
first move; make things right with him. After all, if Thought for tomorrow: One year we thought we
you leave the first move to him, knowing his track picked out the perfect gift for my mother‐in‐law’s
record, you’re likely to end up in court, maybe even birthday: a new golf bag. Our daughter was very
jail.” Matthew 5:23‐25 The Message young at the time, and in her gift‐giving excitement
she sometimes would blurt out the contents of the
Thought for tomorrow: If you’re serious about this gift or “help” by spontaneously ripping off the gift
God thing, you’ve got to take these instructions from wrap. We were so pleased with our gift choice—
His son and apply them to your daily life experience. thinking ourselves quite clever—and we definitely
It’s my prayer for you that you will ask God to make didn’t want the surprise ruined. As we sat down to
you willing to be made willing to be turned upside dinner with the carefully wrapped golf bag at Nana’s
down, so that God can then place you right side up! side, Pete said to our daughter, “Don’t let the cat out
of the bag!”
August 3 Her cute little face crinkled up and her head tilted
to one side. A moment of silence passed, and then
Scripture Reading for today: Jeremiah 27; she chimed in, “Now, that’s a good clue!”
Ecclesiastes 11 and 12 Oh well. What can you do?
I hate to “let the cat out of the bag,” but our
Speculation has it that Solomon is the author of history holds as many clues to our harming habits as
the book of Ecclesiastes (although he is not Solomon’s. Have you ever thought about that? What
specifically named in the text). Solomon is the son of “harming habits” might you have replicated from
King David, whose life we’re about to study as we your family system?
read through 1 and 2 Samuel. If you have a Life
Recovery Bible (Tyndale Publishing, 1999), you can August 4
find a brief biography about the life of Solomon on
page 429. As we read along, think about the fact that Scripture Reading for today: Jeremiah 28; 1 Samuel
the writer of Ecclesiastes may be the product of the 1
family system you’re currently diving into. Think
about this: our history shapes our present and Oh, my gosh! If you are reading along, you are in
future, and there is value in studying it. for a real ride in this section. Soap operas are written
When presented with the opportunity to ask for with less drama than you’re about to vicariously
his greatest wish, Solomon requested wisdom. As a experience as you read the Samuels. Harry Potter’s
result, he became the wisest guy who ever lived. He adventures are child’s play compared to the saga of
did a lot of great things and passed on to future King Saul and David.
generations a bunch of good information. Anytime I prepare to re‐read 1 Samuel, I think
But Solomon wasn’t perfect. As wise as he was and about severed relationships. I think about how even
as much as he loved God, he compromised all he the sweetest of loves can turn sour in a moment’s
believed in by disobeying God in the area of his notice. I think about the sorrow of banishment.
sexuality. And he reaped some serious Do you walk around with a knot in your stomach?
consequences. (Soon you’re going to discover that Are you prone to anxiety attacks? Are you fretful?
this is exactly how Solomon’s daddy messed up.) Do you have some relationships that are so painful
you try to avoid the people involved? Do you
Thought for today: “Jesus said to his disciples, struggle to sleep at night—your mind racing,
‘Things that cause people to sin are bound to come, replaying the “should’ves” and the “would’ves” if
but woe to that person through whom they come. It only you “could’ves?” Are you embarrassed by how
would be better for him to be thrown into the sea you’ve mishandled a relationship?
with a millstone tied around his neck than for him to It seems to me that all broken relationships carry
cause one of these little ones to sin. So watch with them a side order of banishment. Banishment is
yourselves.’” Luke 17:1‐3 NIV a terrible thing. Avoiding or being avoided happens
156
when we make a relationship “boo boo” and don’t sincere? I don’t think so. The truth is that some
have the skill set to go back and figure out how to people’s stories are simply more complicated.
repair and restore the rift that our harming caused. For example, take a look at today’s reading. Eli the
priest did a marvelous job mentoring Samuel and a
Thought for today: “…But God does not take away lousy job raising his own sons. “Now the sons of Eli
life; instead, he devises ways so that a banished were scoundrels who had no respect for the Lord or
person may not remain estranged from him.” 2 for their duties as priests.” 1 Samuel 2:12 NLT That’s
Samuel 14:14 NIV messy. This was a good priest who managed to raise
low‐life boys, even though they had been brought up
Thought for tomorrow: As a people commanded to believing in God and worshiping Him.
love God, others, and self we are not created to live I suspect that after we’ve worked through seven of
easily with banishment. We are created to carry the twelve steps in this process, we’d like to think
within our hearts a huge capacity to receive and to that life should get easier. We’d like to think that we
give love. One of our primary purposes for existing is could just wipe the slate clean of our past wrongs
to dispense this love with boundless enthusiasm and and hopefully keep it clean in the future—neat and
generosity of spirit. 2 Samuel 14 reminds us that God tidy ‐ bad to good. We all long for the “good”
does not take away the inevitable bumps in the road testimony.
of relating one to another, but neither does He leave Maybe that will happen for you. But most people I
us without resources for renewal. I pray that you will know and love have more complicated stories that
be encouraged to know that a season of banishment are definitely not easy. An honest faith journey
does not mean a life of estrangement—as long as recounting may help us discover that although life
you learn how to live life on God’s terms. may not get “easy,” it can get better. One of the
ways God plans for us to have a more abundant life
August 5 is by teaching us how to live with the messiness of
the lives we are currently living. And in the course of
Scripture Reading for today: Jeremiah 29; 1 Samuel living, when we inevitably find ourselves in the midst
2 and 3 of a broken relationship—experiencing banishment
in one form or another—God teaches us how to
I’m sitting in on a class that is talking about the restore relationship. Subsequent steps will provide
stories we tell about our faith journeys. The lecturer more details about this process. This particular step
makes the point that Christians love a “good” is about getting honest about the banishment.
testimony. I know exactly what he means! It’s the
kind of sharing that involves drama and flair. “I once Thought for today: “Search me, O God, and know my
was lost—a low‐life, a loser, a thief, and a scoundrel. heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if
Then I came to know Christ, and now look: I am not there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the
only saved—I have the abundant life!” If the speaker way everlasting.” Psalm 139:23, 24 NIV
is entertaining and fills in the gaps with a lot of wild
stories involving mis‐spending one’s youth, the Thought for tomorrow: Frankly, we need to give up
listener is captivated. on the childish notion of an easy life. Let it go. It’s
This story of instantaneous change is simple and holding us back! When Jesus said He came so that
easy to quantify from bad to good. Awesome. we might be free, so that we might experience
Not all testimonies are that simple. For those of us abundant living—He wasn’t thinking about easy!
who have more complex stories, we find the tidiness How different would your expectations be if you set
of this kind of narrative vaguely dissatisfying. aside your silly notion of an easy life (and got busy
What about the person who was also a low‐life, living the good life)?

loser, thief, and scoundrel who came to know Christ
and still struggles with low‐life habits, loser choices,
honesty, and ethics? Was this person simply less

157
August 6 When I failed to address their boundary‐less,
disrespectful behaviors towards my family, I did
Scripture Reading for today: Jeremiah 30; 1 Samuel harm. I took from them an opportunity to learn how
4 and 5 their actions impacted others. I wronged these
people. I encourage you to allow your list to expand
When I made my first “list” it came in two parts. I as God transforms you. Maturity, renewed
compiled the first section quickly—it was the list of perspectives, more education, and broader life
people I had obviously harmed. You know what I experiences inform our hindsight. All of this will
mean. It’s easy to recall the names and faces of require us to be flexible and open to adding to our
people we have harmed in ways that we cannot list. If not, we’re going to be stunted in our growth.
deny, rationalize, justify, or blame someone else for We might end up running around with a sippy cup
the wrong done. I had a second section too. This list hanging out of our mouths far longer than is age
expanded as I matured. Sometimes we have to grow appropriate.
up a bit before we can recognize the truth of our
harming ways. Thought for today: “Do not say, ‘I’ll pay you back for
Once we had friends visit us with their small this wrong!’ Wait for the Lord, and he will deliver
children. We had recently moved into a new home, you.” Proverbs 20:22 NIV
and I had saved my pennies until I could re‐carpet
the living and dining rooms. Don’t ask me why I did Thought for tomorrow: I must confess that after the
this, but I chose a very beautiful, barely off‐white juice‐spilling incident, my resentment grew in direct
carpet. We didn’t allow our children to eat unless proportion to my desire for revenge. If I couldn’t get
they were sitting at the kitchen table or den, so the justice (stains removed) I wanted payback. In fact, I
lovely carpet was unblemished and not much of a thought payback might just be how the Lord would
maintenance problem for me—until our visitors deliver me! In my immature thinking, I thought
arrived. Proverbs 20:22 was saying that although I could not
I knew they allowed their children to carry food exact my own revenge, God would do it for me.
and drink everywhere, and so I specifically shared That’s not what happened. Instead, I continued to
with our guests that the children were not allowed grow up while waiting for God to smite the evil
to take snacks into my “formal rooms.” They didn’t grape‐juice spillers. I came to realize that when
pay me a bit of attention. Their children ran through Proverbs said “’I will get even for this wrong.’ Wait
my home with sippy cups brimming with grape juice. for the Lord to handle the matter” NLT, God handled
Soon a trail of grape juice stains blanketed my me! He revealed to me that I too had harmed this
precious new carpet (anything you save and save “offensive” family by not being willing to lovingly
and save for tends to seem precious). confront the situation. God handled me because I
The parents of these wild things looked at me, did far more harm to the relationship by being
laughed and said, “That’s what you get for making unforgiving, resentful, revengeful, non‐
such a foolish choice in carpet colors! We would confrontational, insincere, etc., than they did by
never put a white carpet in our house!” being careless with a few juice cups. Now when I
I thought to myself, “That’s the point. This isn’t read this proverb, what I hear is: Teresa, be slow to
your house.” At this time in our lives, we had very arrogance, thinking that you are so harmed by
few recovery principles in our possession, and so I another that the urge for revenge is appropriate.
handled the situation very poorly. I kept my mouth Hold up, pause to prepare, and God will deliver you.
shut and a deep resentment lodged in my heart. He’ll grow you up, and teach you a broader view of
They did not make my first version of my list of this current situation than your limited maturity can
persons I had harmed; they didn’t make my second currently comprehend.
list either. However, they did make my 4.0 version. It There’s always more to the story, and often it
took me awhile to get past my perception of their involves me seeing more clearly how I am harming
offensiveness and see more clearly my own. another. I pray that all of us will increase our
sensitivity this month, and may our lists be true!
158

mourned because it seemed the Lord had abandoned
August 7 them.” 1 Samuel 7:2 NLT
“Not so!” we cry with our theology intact; The Lord
Scripture Reading for today: Jeremiah 31; 1 Samuel will never leave us nor forsake us! Those Israelites
6 and 7 got it wrong—again. (But if we’re honest, we can
relate to how they feel.)
“I am just so sick of this recovery talk. Why can’t I Do you remember what Eli’s daughter‐in‐law said
just get on with living?” The irony of the statement in the face of all those consequences? “She named
did not escape me. Here she sat, grumbling about the child Ichabod (which means “Where is the
“recovery talk,” when just a few short months ago glory?”), for she said, “Israel’s glory is gone.” 1
she was faithfully walking the talk. Having Samuel 4:21 NLT She concluded this as she lived
abandoned it for her own way of doing things, she through the dire circumstances that came as a result
sits in front of me in large part because she got tired of poor sowing, and she netted terrible reaping.
of walking the talk. She “got on with living” and It’s easy to toss stones over our shoulders towards
presently finds herself losing every single thing she times long gone. Those Israelites make tidy targets
thought her life was worth living for. Soon her angry for our disdain of their poor theology and blatant
outburst is accompanied by hot tears of remorse, rebellion. My friend’s obvious lack of perspective can
regret, and shame. have us wagging our heads in thinly veiled judgment
“I just got tired of trying to do the right thing every too.
day and not feeling any better.” But before you send But hold on for a second. Are you patient with
her a sympathy card, remember that her your own “becoming,” even when it’s painful? Even
commitment to doing “right” is measured in months when it seems like life isn’t great (and you think it
as compared to years and years of practicing all should be if you’re doing it “right”)? My friend
kinds of bad‐girl behaving. During those short abandoned her God‐centered, recovery‐focused life
months of recovery, she was causing less harm, simply because she thought “it” was taking too long.
experiencing fewer negative consequences, and God wasn’t providing sufficient reward to keep her
even receiving what the casual observer would think head in the game. The Israelites lived for twenty
of as blessings. But on this day my friend didn’t want years with the thought that God abandoned them.
me to confuse her with any facts. She just wanted to What about you? Step eight will require us to be
be angry that God wasn’t giving her the great life. willing to “become.” It doesn’t say we’ve got to rush
“It just wasn’t good enough. I want more from to get there, already be there, or even know exactly
life.” She didn’t want a decent life; she wanted a what the “becoming” is going to mean. Step eight is
great life—as defined by her. One of the tough about process—not making the perfect list.
truths of recovery is that sometimes it gets worse
before it gets better. We may set aside our particular Thought for today: “For God can use sorrow in our
bad habit, but that doesn’t mean we immediately lives to help us turn away from sin and seek
begin to feel like a million bucks. For people who salvation. We will never regret that kind of sorrow.
don’t like to delay gratification, the fact that it takes But sorrow without repentance is the kind that
lots of time to “become” our God‐created identity results in death.” 2 Corinthians 7:10 NLT
and develop the maturity to appreciate that
“becoming” is a tough truth.
I hope you’ve read 1 Samuel 7. You’ll recall that in Thought for tomorrow: “Became: This is a process.
chapter four Eli, his family, and the entire nation of If we will be responsible to God and make the list, He
Israel suffered consequences for their disobedience. will take responsibility for us, and make us willing.
In chapter seven the Israelites ask Samuel to plead This is a deep mystery, and takes place in the heart.
with the Lord to save them, and He does.
But let’s not skip over the introduction to chapter
seven: “The Ark remained in Kiriath‐Jearim for a long
time—twenty years in all. During that time all Israel
159
Part of trusting God to do His part is simply making negative consequences may appear to be delayed,
the list, in spite of our reluctance and our pain.” 24 thereby confusing us if we’re not paying attention.
My friend and the Israelites were suffering and The Israelites have been systematically showing by
sorrowful. But was there repentance? I don’t their behavior that they don’t much care what God
suppose speculating about that on their behalf is desires for them. For awhile it’s going to seem as if a
very recovery‐friendly. However, asking that king is a good idea; but eventually, the law of cause
question of ourselves might be an excellent next and effect kicks in.
right step. A clue to the answer will be found in our This same law is valid today. God has commanded
willingness to make as thorough a list as our that we love Him, others, and self. That’s his
limitations will allow and to become willing to make command. Sometimes the effect of our failure to
amends to them all. love God, others, and self in a healthy way can be
missed—for a while. We can behave badly in the
August 8 love department and show up every Sunday for
church all cleaned up, dressed up, and demonstrate
Scripture Reading for today: Jeremiah 32; 1 Samuel a form of godliness, but eventually time will reveal
8 and 9 the truth about how we’re really doing in the area of
submitting to the authority of God. And God says we
You have got to read 1 Samuel 8! It’s an amazing are to love Him, others, and self; if we’re not doing
story. The people of Israel are asking for a king; God that, eventually an “effect” will be felt.
chooses to grant their request. He grants their Take for example this guy whose wife has left him.
request in spite of his displeasure with that request. He keeps calling her, asking her to go to counseling,
(Isn’t that interesting? Sometimes we think God making an appointment to meet with their pastor,
hears our requests and says yes, no, or wait. It’s etc. Now he’s interested in his marriage. Now he’s
amazing to think that sometimes He says, “OK, confused about why she packed up her bags and
you’ve refused to listen to me. So I’m going to give moved three states away. Now he wants
you what you’ve asked for, but you’re not going to suggestions, counsel, advice, and if at all possible, an
like it for long…”) Here’s what God says about this ally in wooing his wayward wife back home. She’s
situation in the early verses of this chapter: “Samuel not coming back. Why? Because after 20 years of his
was displeased with their request (for a king) and infidelity; abuse; negligence; demeaning put‐downs;
went to the Lord for guidance. ‘Do everything they lack of respect; absence of cherishing; selfish, self‐
say to you,’ the Lord replied, ‘for it is me they are serving workaholism—she’s done. He doesn’t get
rejecting, not you. They don’t want me to be their this.
king any longer. Ever since I brought them from “How could a good Christian woman do such a
Egypt they have continually abandoned me and thing? You’re a minister. Can’t you do something? A
followed other gods.’” 1 Samuel 8:6‐8 NLT woman is supposed to stand by her man.”
Note the following: The people acted like goofs for “Well, pal, it’s called the law of cause and effect.
a long time, and God noticed. God was not hasty in After years of demonstrating that you don’t want to
His actions; He was patient. But enough is enough, be a husband, she finally believes you. She’s done.
and God is going to give them their request. (This This is the effect. It was caused by your harming
reminds me of the verse, “He gave them the desires ways.”
of their heart, but sent leanness to their souls.”)
The law of cause and effect is in play. Because the Thought for today: “A new command I give you:
people have stubbornly resisted the authority of Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must
God, God is going to give them over to the desires of love one another. By this all men will know you are
their own hearts. The effect is that there are going to my disciples, If you love one another.” John 13:34‐35
be negative consequences. Due to God’s patience, NIV

Thought for tomorrow: The best definition of harm
24
The Christ-Centered 12 Step Study Guide, Step 8, p.8. A that I know of is this: anytime we step in
NorthStar Community publication.
160
contradiction to God’s voice. God wants us to love sidelines while their father acts like each shot will
Him, others, and self. He has some principles about determine his rankings on the tennis circuit.
how that should look; we don’t get to make it up as Finally, mom shows us with an infant in tow, and
we go along. If you’ve defined love differently than after Dad releases some tension by yelling at her for
God has instructed, expect “effects.” interrupting their practice session, he storms off the
court leaving mom to gather up all the practice
August 9 supplies that are not already in the pool.

Scripture Reading for today: Jeremiah 33; 1 Samuel Thought for today: “The end of all things is near.
10 and 11 Therefore be clear‐minded and self‐controlled so that
you can pray. Above all, love each other deeply,
One morning on vacation Pete and I woke up early because love covers over a multitude of sins.” 1 Peter
and headed out to play tennis before the 4:7‐8 NIV
thermometer hit 100 degrees. Others had similar
ideas. Soon, a father with two young children Thought for tomorrow: I can’t help but wonder:
appeared on the court behind us. Soon I was What was the desired outcome for this parent
reminded of step eight. today? Was he hoping to get his kids fit for tennis?
It was already blistering hot, and dad was bringing Does he dream of this brother‐sister duo someday
two of his young children down to “practice” their beating out the Agassi/Graf siblings? I certainly have
tennis. First, he had them hitting against the practice had some days as a parent when I have had to learn
wall. At ages three and four, that wall must have from my mistakes. Maybe he’ll self‐correct as the
looked pretty daunting. But not to worry: dad day goes on, take those kids to the pool, and stop
decided to make a “game” of practice. expecting them to have the skill sets of a ten‐year‐
“OK kids. Here’s how we’re going to do it. One old. But if he doesn’t, harm is happening. And
person hits against the wall until they miss, and then ultimately, it won’t matter what his intentions were
the next person steps up until they miss. This is on this hot morning; he’s failed at the one thing that
going to be great fun! I’ll go first.” God calls us to set our heart on—loving each other
Bam, bam, bam went the ball against the wall, as deeply. At any given moment, when we are unwilling
the patriarch of the family managed to succeed at 20 or unable to love each other deeply, we have
or so hits before having to cede the practice round harmed.
to his three‐year‐old. Junior then promptly hit his
ball over the wall and into the pool. Up stepped big August 10
sister. She did the same.
“Too bad you guys haven’t got your ‘A’ game this Scripture Reading for today: Jeremiah 34; 1 Samuel
morning. Daddy’s turn!” Bam, bam, bam—this time 12 and 13
he got about ten smacks on the wall before his ball
sailed over the wall and into the pool. Slamming Our tubing on the river provided another
down his racket, he reluctantly nodded toward opportunity to define “harm” and sparked a lively
Junior. I wondered if this is Dad’s ‘A’ game; and all debate. Here’s what happened. Our party of seven,
that wondering promptly cost me a point. (My along with 40 strangers, began an excursion down
husband is all about playing tennis and is not the the river on individual tubes.
least concerned about the family dynamics playing One of the instructions we were given was to stay
out on the court beside us.) together. Not mentioning any names, but some in
Eventually, the children begin to look longingly our family take instructions more seriously than
toward the pool. I suspect that they are not wishing others. Much to our surprise, we discovered the only
for their tennis balls back. I think they want to go person in the world who is incapable of successfully
frolic in the cool mountain water like the other tubing—even with a favorable current. Within
children their age. Unable to manage to get the ball minutes, this woman’s family had deserted her and
to hit the practice wall, they are relegated to the whisked themselves down the river, leaving her
161
floundering with no discernable forward progress. I hope all of us realize that this step is about the
Certainly this violated the stay‐together rule! process of becoming. It is a tough step, and we need
Our group likes staying together, and it wasn’t long to be gentle with ourselves as we grow into
before we realized that one of us was missing. It willingness.
seems our daughter took it upon herself to help the Willing: Prepared to accept full responsibility for
woman. Grabbing whatever we could to hold our our own lives and the harm our choices (intended or
position, we waited for Meredith and her hapless not) have done others. The previous steps help
new friend. Eventually, they managed to catch up. prepare us for “willingness.” Most of us have
My guys were pretty sure that this woman’s patterns of blaming others, avoiding responsibility,
husband would be sleeping on the couch after he and seeking retribution for the wrongs done us.
left her stranded in the middle of the river. They’re Willingness means we make it our job to focus on
reasonably confident that it won’t be a pull‐out our own behaviors and stop distracting ourselves
sofa—more like a small loveseat. They think the with the shortcomings of others.
husband harmed the wife by not sticking with her. Are you becoming willing?
Although the entire group felt Meredith was
extremely kind to offer herself as a personal tug Thought for today: “Anyone who claims to be in the
boat, we split on whether not helping would have light but hates his brother is still in the darkness.
been harmful. Recalling the river guide’s Whoever loves his brother lives in the light, and there
instructions, stragglers would be left and retrieved at is nothing in him to make him stumble. But whoever
a later time. Technically speaking, she eventually hates his brother is in the darkness and walks around
would have gotten home! Was harm averted? in the darkness; he does not know where he is going,
because the darkness has blinded him.” 1 John 2:9‐
Thought for today: “Be kind and compassionate to 11 NIV
one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ
God forgave you.” Ephesians 4:32 NIV Thought for tomorrow: I don’t think it is humanly
possible to see ourselves accurately without
Thought for tomorrow: We never did reach accepting the light of God. We receive this light as
consensus on whether it was the McBean family’s we choose to become willing to accept what it
job to provide a river rescue or simply enjoy the reveals. May your day be filled with light so that your
adventure we paid for without concern for a tomorrows may bring God (and self and others)
stranger with a tubing‐skill handicap. But one thing delight.
we all agreed on: kindness and compassion are
always appropriate. Sometimes, it’s not about August 12
whether we’re “harming” or not so much as it is
whether we’re expressing ourselves as Christ did. I Scripture Reading for today: Jeremiah 36; 1 Samuel
can appreciate the fact that Meredith didn’t “owe” 16 and 17
this lady a tow. But I admire the fact that she didn’t
check her compassionate spirit at the riverbanks in Harm: Harm is caused
lieu of a lazy day of tubing without thought to ‐ physically (injuring or damaging persons or
anyone or anything but her own good time. Who property, financial irresponsibility resulting in loss
would you need to add to your eighth‐step list if you for another, refusing to abide by agreements legally
considered the absence of kindness and compassion made, neglect or abuse of those in our care),
harmful? ‐ morally (inappropriate behavior regarding moral
or ethical issues including: fairness, doing the “right
August 11 thing,” irresponsible behaviors at work, home, etc.,
ignoring the needs of others
Scripture Reading for today: Jeremiah 35; 1 Samuel or usurping the welfare of others with our own
14 and 15 selfish pursuits, infidelity, abuse, lying, broken
trust), and
162
‐ spiritually (failure to live out our God‐created awful amends; heck, I’ve done both awesome and
identity to the detriment of others; failure to awful amends to others. Amends is not saying we’re
support and encourage that same living in others). sorry we got caught. It’s not saying, “I did wrong, but
The root of harm is usually selfishness; it is you did worse.” It has not one tinge of accusation.
complicated by our narcissism (inability to see Amends is not, “Mistakes were made, can’t we just
another’s perspective) and defensiveness move on?” An amends is never “I feel terrible that I
(unwillingness to look at ourselves accurately). did that to you…” (with the hidden agenda of trying
Becoming willing to deal with all this stuff is tough. to make the offended make us feel better). If any
I’m reminded of something Jesus said: “Apart from one of us tries to pass those scenarios off as part of
me, you can do nothing.” Certainly that applies to amends making, we’re going to make a bad situation
our ability to recognize how we’ve harmed others. worse—and rightfully so—for those are not amends.
Amends: The process of sincerely seeking to repair
Thought for today: Love from the center of who you the damage done. Mike O’Neill (Power to Choose)
are; don’t fake it. Run for dear life from evil; hold on describes this as a two‐step process: apology and
for dear life to good. Be good friends who love restitution. Today we’re going to address apology.
deeply; practice playing second fiddle. Don’t burn Apology: “I was wrong.” It is not “I am sorry.”
out; keep yourselves fueled and aflame. Be alert Being sorry and acknowledging wrongdoing are two
servants of the Master, cheerfully expectant. Don’t different issues. Sorry is ambiguous in nature. What
quit in hard times; pray all the harder. Help needy exactly are we sorry for? Are we sorry that we got
Christians; be inventive in hospitality. Bless your caught, have to deal with this, that the behavior was
enemies; no cursing under your breath. Laugh with lousy, that we have to deal with this conflict? More
your happy friends when they’re happy; share tears drama doesn’t make for a better apology! When we
when they’re down. Get along with each other; don’t go to the shame‐based “I’m sorry” place, sometimes
be stuck‐up. Make friends with nobodies; don’t be we just fall all over ourselves and are willing to
the great somebody. . . . Don’t insist on getting even; confess anything and everything for the sake of
that’s not for you to do. “I’ll do the judging,” says placating the person we have harmed. Making an
God. “I’ll take care of it.” Our Scriptures tell us that if apology isn’t about confessing that which is not true.
you see your enemy hungry, go buy that person Humans err, and some of those mistakes are
lunch, or if he’s thirsty, get him a drink. Your whoppers. Admitting that is good. But that is not the
generosity will surprise him with goodness. Don’t let same as shame‐based amends, which says, “Hey, I
evil get the best of you; get the best of evil by doing am a sorry person.” A heartfelt apology will include a
good. Romans 12:9‐21 The Message deeply remorseful expression of regret for harm
done. Accepting responsibility for the wrong
Thought for tomorrow: Wow! I find plenty of behavior is the heart of an effective apology and can
harming to deal with when I read instructions like be a humbling experience. Think of it like this: it
this! How about you? takes more character and integrity to go to a person
and tell them the exact nature of the wrong done
August 13 than it does to grovel with an expression of regret
that is ill‐defined. Be specific. 25
Scripture Reading for today: Jeremiah 37; 1 Samuel
18 and 19 Thought for today: “You have heard that it was said
to the people long ago, ‘Do not murder, and anyone
Frankly, I have very little trouble admitting I have who murders will be subject to judgment.’ But I tell
harmed others; just don’t make me acknowledge you that anyone who is angry with his brother will be
that to anyone else! Most of us know when we’ve subject to the judgment…Therefore, if you are
blown it. For me, the trouble comes when I ask offering your gift at the altar and there remember
myself if I’m willing to make amends.
This is a very slippery slope. We must pause to
25
prepare. I have witnessed awesome amends and The Christ-Centered 12 Step Study Guide, Step 8, A NorthStar
Community Publication, p.9.
163
that your brother has something against you, leave
your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be Thought for tomorrow: Everyone’s heard of the
reconciled to your brother, then come and offer your golden rule. But I want to suggest the Platinum Rule:
gift.” Matthew 5:21‐24 NIV Treat others as they’d like to be treated. At
NorthStar we have an awesome trainer guru who
Thought for tomorrow: Don’t miss tomorrow’s helps us work on improving our serve. When she
devotional; we’re going to learn about O’Neill’s first marched out the Platinum Rule, this room full of
second part of the amends process. believers said, “Hey, you can’t top the golden rule!”
But in fact, you can. In Philippians 2 we are called to
August 14 even higher ground than gold. Think about which is
easier: treating others as you like to be treated or
Scripture Reading for today: Jeremiah 38; 1 Samuel treating others as they like to be treated. Isn’t it
20 and 21 option two? Doesn’t that require us to think harder
and longer? Of course it does. We have to become a
In Mike O’Neill’s workbook, Power to Choose, he student of every person we desire to relate to. I love
considers the amends process incomplete if all we words of affirmation and quality time; I really love
do is acknowledge our harming ways. “I did wrong them when they come as a pair! But my husband is
when I ______.” This is an excellent first step of the an “acts of service” kind of guy. I can affirm him until
two‐step process. O’Neill encourages us not to stop the cows come home, and he thinks, “Why does she
with step one. keep going on and on with all that affirming
Restitution: “What can I do to make this right?” nonsense? Can’t she just remember to buy me
Just saying you’re sorry isn’t enough! Nor is it orange juice, peanut butter, and crackers at the
enough to decide for yourself how to make it right. store?” If I want my man to feel loved, I can forget all
An apology without restitution is not an amends. that flowery flattery and just make sure I keep the
Sometimes restitution takes place before the pantry stocked. Which is the greater sacrifice: to love
amends. If you owe back child support, pay it, says the way that’s easy and natural for me, or to love
O’Neill. If you can’t make good on the full amount, the way that means something to him? Restitution
then O’Neill recommends that you send what you requires whipping out the Platinum Rule.
can every month. I suggest that you also get real
about what you can truly afford to send. I wouldn’t August 15
expect you to be able to buy yourself big‐boy toys (if
you’re a guy) or a bunch of new clothes with all the Scripture Reading for today: Jeremiah 39; 1 Samuel
accessories (if you’re a gal), unless and until you 22 and 23
have first covered your financial obligations to your
children. Trust me. It is unlikely you will be given an Boy, that King Saul is giving David fits, isn’t he?
opportunity to apologize until you make some good‐ There’s a book called Walking on Eggshells. The
faith restitution. 26 book addresses the challenges of dealing with
Perhaps you realize that some harms result in people who start out acting like they love us to
injury too profound to repay. That’s true. Whether pieces, and eventually become people whom we
the injury is financial, emotional, spiritual, or suspect would like to chop us into pieces. It makes
whatever, you still need to ask the restitution us feel like we’re walking on eggshells. I suspect
question and proceed as best you can. David felt that way with Saul, especially in the
beginning when Saul ran hot and cold in his feelings
Thought for today: “In everything, do to others what for David.
you would have them do to you, for this sums up the In the next few days, I’m going to give you some
law and the Prophets.” Matthew 7:12 NIV opportunities to examine God’s perspective on
various kinds of relationships. It’s my prayer that
these additional scripture passages will jog your
26
Community Publication, pp.9 and 10.
164
spirit, helping you to recognize possible harming I have the greatest life! I get to listen and learn
ways that you did not know were harming. from all sorts of smart and cool people every day.
Yesterday I asked one of my favorite therapists what
Thought for today: David needed to rely on God to he thinks makes for a healthy family. I loved his
help him know how to deal with a boss who was answer. He said healthy and unhealthy families have
trying to cut him into little pieces. Working the same kinds of problems, crises, etc. but healthy
relationships are discussed in 2 Timothy 2:15; 1 families: name their problems, expect to find a
Timothy 6:1‐2; Ephesians 4:28 and 6:5‐9; and 2 solution, grow in their awareness of both individual
Thessalonians 3:6‐10. and family system “weaknesses,” search for
solutions, and do all of this with honesty and
Thought for tomorrow: Are you harming anyone at respect.
work? He went on to say that lots of this is about learning
how to cope effectively (as opposed to in a
August 16 maladaptive way) with strong emotions and serious
issues. Whew! My family often exhibits strong
Scripture Reading for today: Jeremiah 40; 1 Samuel emotions (some negative) and serious issues. I’m
24 and 25 encouraged to hear that we’re…sort of…normal. I’m
glad normal doesn’t mean perpetually perky!
Sometimes God uses scripture to teach us how to
love well with minimal harm, but He does it subtly. Thought for today: God tells us about emotions in
Take for example David and Saul’s relationship. God lots of places in scripture (both by implication and
doesn’t fax a message and say: hey, respect your through direct teaching). Here are a few places that
boss even if you think he/she is a big goof. I’ve found personally helpful: 2 Timothy 1:7, 2:14
But he teaches us that same principle in 1 Samuel and verses 23 and 24; James 1:19‐20; Ephesians
24. 4:26‐27, 31‐32; Philippians 4:2‐9; James 4:1‐10;
Matthew 5:21‐26.
Thought for today: “’The Lord knows I shouldn’t
have done that to my lord the king,’ he said to his Thought for tomorrow: Are you able to identify both
men. ‘The Lord forbid that I should do this to my lord your strengths and weaknesses in the area of
and king and attack the Lord’s anointed one, for the emotions? Can you honestly name your problems?
Lord himself has chosen him.’” 1 Samuel 24:6 NLT Do you expect, and are you eagerly seeking,
solutions to your life struggles? Are you dealing with
Thought for tomorrow: David’s life is illustrating a all your interpersonal relationships honestly and
principle that scripture supports: even at work, even respectfully? If not, you’re harming.
when our boss is a goof, even when our employees
are knuckleheads, we need to treat them all with August 18
gentleness and respect. It’s not about whether they
deserve it, or whether it’s convenient or easy; we do Scripture Reading for today: Jeremiah 42; 1 Samuel
it because God said so. We do it because as 28 and 29
desperately devoted followers of Him, we’re
committed to following Him even when it’s Can David catch a break? David has some “issues,”
annoying, inconvenient, and just plain hard. but his warrior spirit and fighting abilities are not
among them. In chapter 29 he’s rejected by a group
August 17 of people who should appreciate him, but they do
not. Whether we’re in a position of authority or
Scripture Reading for today: Jeremiah 41; 1 Samuel under someone’s authority, we often find ourselves
26 and 27 feeling unappreciated and even rejected. How are
we supposed to respond?

165
Thought for today: 1 Peter 2:13‐14 and Romans Thought for tomorrow: Can you envision a world
13:17 speak to this subject. where people who disagree do so with gentleness
and respect? Can you envision a world absent of
Thought for tomorrow: Issues of authority are gossiping, slandering, and scheming? I personally
difficult. No matter what, we are supposed to be would like that to be the case in our upcoming
people who respond with gentleness and respect. elections! Do you think I should count on that?
This is a tough challenge, especially for those of us Here’s the thing: each of us has the ability to make
who have a natural inclination to push back against this happen. We can choose to stop this bad
any kind of authority figure. Yesterday Pete (my behaving. If each of us stopped this behavior,
hubbie) was driving down a narrow hilly road, and without concern for whether others do or not,
someone passed him on the downhill section! For wouldn’t we have a safe and secure community to
those of you who don’t live in our area: no one live and love in?
should EVER pass anyone on that particular road!
Pete reports that he was probably going 30 to 35 August 20
mph. (I think the speed limit is 25 mph, which does
require you to apply your brakes if you want to stick Scripture Reading for today: Jeremiah 44; 2 Samuel
to the letter of the law.) Pete’s point is that he 1 and 2
wasn’t dawdling. Mr. Calm said he had an urge to
really give that guy a piece of his mind when he Although David was not Saul’s biological son, in
found himself behind him at the next traffic light, many ways they had a parent/child relationship.
which we all found amazing from a man who’s Upon the death of Saul and in spite of Saul’s crazy
usually quite collected. He didn’t. Why? Because he jealousy of David, David grieved the loss of his
decided anyone who would drive like that might also mentor. Not all family is determined by DNA; lots of
have a semi‐automatic rifle stuffed under the family is a gift from God. It’s the people he brings
driver’s seat. I think there’s a far better reason for into our lives to encourage, exhort, enrich, and (on a
Pete to have maintained his cool. It’s what a good day) entertain us!
desperately devoted follower needs to learn how to Harming in families happens; and it’s always a
do. Sometimes our relationships with authority tragedy. What’s worse, sometimes we continue
figures (and our positions as authority figures) teach harming from one generation to the next while
us the patience necessary to apply the principles of thinking nothing of it. It’s what we learned, a way of
gentleness and respect in all sorts of life situations. life, and to us it’s normal. Normal doesn’t always
equal healthy. We owe it to our families to see what
August 19 God has to say about healthy families (and unhealthy
ones).
Scripture Reading for today: Jeremiah 43; 1 Samuel
30 and 31 Thought for today: Family relationships are
discussed in: Exodus 20; Deuteronomy 6:1‐4; 1
The death of Saul ends an era of gossip, slander, Timothy 5:3‐4; Ephesians 5:1‐4; and Ephesians 5:21‐
and scheming between Saul and David, but it doesn’t 33 (to name just a few). Since we all live in families, I
end the problem. In the years ahead, David, his recommend you find a place in your notebook to
family, and his community are going to continue to keep track of all the things you come upon in
struggle with these harming ways. scripture that can guide you in how to create a
healthy family. It’s never too late to learn.
Thought for today: Everyone knows it is not right to
gossip, slander, and scheme! But have we been Thought for tomorrow: Most of us intend to create
willing to be honest about our own harming ways in awesome families; all of us fail at this from time to
these particular areas? Perhaps it would help us if time. Be alert. Keep learning.
we read James 4:11‐12 and 1 Peter 2:1‐3.

166
August 21 destiny to treat one’s spouse with both respect and
an attitude of cherishing. Michal couldn’t do that. No
Scripture Reading for today: Jeremiah 45; 2 Samuel doubt, David didn’t make it easy for her to choose a
3 and 4 respectful, cherishing attitude toward him. Michal’s
father took her and separated her from David for
Throughout the life of David we note that he has a several years—handing her over to another man to
messy relationship with his neighbors and spite David. Eventually David is able to negotiate the
community. Wasn’t it Robert Frost who said return of Michal, but it seems the damage was done.
something like “fences make good neighbors?” Upon her return, she comes home to a house filled
We’ve lived in the same house for 20 years; with “other wives.” These two never seem to get on
sometimes it requires a lot of maturity to live well track again.
with your neighbors and honorably in your
community. Thought for today: Read 2 Timothy 2:22, Ephesians
We had a cat who used to love to jump on my 5:3, Romans 14:11‐14, and Matthew 5:27‐30 for
neighbor’s car. I’m sure they hated that! But they further insights into God’s perspective on sexuality.
were very kind and generous to us—gracious and
long suffering. They used to commend our cat for Thought for tomorrow: If we could learn how to
keeping down the vole population in their lovely treat our spouses with gentleness and respect—
yard. This kind of gentle patience could not have cherishing them morning, noon, and night—I suspect
been easy for people who had no pets. I hope I can we’d have fewer instances of sexual sins and
model this same attitude. God has things to say adultery. Are you guarding your marriage? If you’re
about how to live in community. not married, are you developing the kind of
character that will make you the kind of spouse that
Thought for today: Care to consider whether you it is a delight to cherish and respect if God has
are living well or not with your neighbors. Read marriage planned for your future?
Proverbs 3:29‐32, 3:27; 1 Timothy 5:1‐17; James 2:1‐
10; and Romans 12:4‐13. August 23

Thought for tomorrow: How’s your citizenship? If Scripture Reading for today: Jeremiah 47; 2 Samuel
you were a Scout, would you qualify for a badge of 7 and 8
honor in this area?
One of the things that makes it easy to stick to our
August 22 Bible‐reading plan in the Samuels is all the intrigue.
In future chapters, things continue to stay messy and
Scripture Reading for today: Jeremiah 46; 2 Samuel difficult for King David. Have you ever thought that if
5 and 6 you were the king of your kingdom that life would be
easy? Do you fantasize about ordering your spouse,
David was an awesome warrior but in many ways employees, and children around? Have you ever
an awful family man. One of the signs of trouble in thought about writing up a “to do” list and then
this arena of David’s life is found in 1 Samuel 6. It expecting your minions to follow through with your
seems like Michal, daughter of Saul and wife of orders? I suppose with enough manipulation,
David, was “filled with contempt” as she observed control, and anger there would be times when we
David celebrating the return of the Ark to the City of might have the illusion of this kind of power. If so,
David. Lord help us. We weren’t created to rule and have a
I’m quite sure I don’t understand all the subtleties wonderful life. Even King David, given a lot of power
of this text. But I get this: a woman who has by God Himself, did not have an easy life once he got
contempt for her spouse is headed for trouble. the crown and cool kingly clothes.
That’s why I preach the gospel of choosing a spouse To the extent that we are given authority, we need
well. Because once you have them, it becomes one’s to be certain we understand the burden of
167
responsibility that comes with that authority. God is both willing and able to do His good, pleasing, and
clear about communicating our place in the area of perfect will. I don’t think I could love my enemies
rights versus responsibilities. Those who are given without God’s power. Failure to do so, however, is
positions of “authority” must be aware of how harming behavior. I can’t stop with this statement. I
dangerous and awesome a responsibility that is. All must add that loving your enemies is not the
leaders are called to be servant leaders. It is never equivalent of letting them walk all over you. Once I
about getting to a place where we can push others had a friend whose husband slapped her around on
around. a regular basis. I suggested that this man was more
of an enemy than a friend. She agreed and said
Thought for today: I love 1 Peter 3:13‐22 and 4:1‐ that’s why she stayed with him. This statement
6—a marvelous discussion of rights versus required serious pausing to prepare on my part.
responsibilities. Finally, I was able to calm my heart and say this,
“You know, I do not think God is telling us that to
Thought for tomorrow: In my life, I find that if I stick love our enemies is the equivalent of saying one
to taking care of my responsibilities, God seems to should tolerate abuse from a husband. Wouldn’t it
be quite capable of watching out for my rights. be a far more loving thing to hold your spouse
However, when I start feeling empowered and accountable for his misdeeds, believing that he can
entitled, my life can slide downhill at an amazing change, but for sure not become a stumbling block
speed. by allowing him to continue to sin against you?”
Sometimes the most loving thing we can do for
August 24 another person is to honestly name a problem and
lovingly hold them accountable for their wrongs
Scripture Reading for today: Jeremiah 48; 2 Samuel against us. Simply tolerating abuse can never be a
9 and 10 loving act. So please, be careful how you interpret
this devotional. Don’t allow its principles to be mis‐
Even I can sometimes muster up the maturity to applied. I think it is possible to lovingly, respectfully
love those that love me well. I’m blessed with people address behaviors that lead us to believe someone is
in my life that are great at loving me. Sometimes I our enemy without causing harm ourselves. It may
can imitate this awesome loving myself. But I find it take a small army of resource people to help us sort
extremely difficult to love my enemies. this all out, but it’s an effort God endorses.
Jesus set an extremely challenging example when
he taught us to not only love those who love us, but August 25
love those who are our enemies as well. He taught
this; he lived it too. This kind of high‐class living Scripture Reading for today: Jeremiah 49; 2 Samuel
shouldn’t have come as a surprise to us. As far back 11 and 12
as the Old Testament, God was giving us a foretaste
of the kind of awesome lovers he was going to equip “In the spring of the year, when kings normally go
us to become. out to war, David sent Joab and the Israelite army to
In 2 Samuel 9, David discovered Mephibosheth, a fight the Ammonites. They destroyed the Ammonite
relative of Saul. David extends him love. By any army and laid siege to the city of Rabbah. However,
standards this was risky behavior—potentially loving David stayed behind in Jerusalem.” 2 Samuel 11:1
an enemy. But David does it anyway. NLT

Thought for today: For further instruction on loving Obviously, Joab was quite capable of fighting
our enemies see: 1 Peter 3:8‐9, Romans 12:14‐21, Ammonites. The problem is not Joab’s military
and Matthew 5:38‐48 capabilities. The issue is that David shirked his
responsibility as a king. Kings are supposed to march
Thought for tomorrow: I’m glad that we have off to war with their armies and lay siege on things,
scripture to teach us that it is God who makes us
168
whether they’ve got awesome generals on staff or potential positives to give his kids: giant slayer,
not. warrior, care and respect for authority, a man after
This is a bad sign for David. He’s lost his groove. God’s own heart. But he had some pretty potent
This one single act of failure to act kingly puts David defects too. He committed murder to cover up
in a position where he will now make a series of adultery; he sometimes hid from his responsibilities.
extremely poor choices that will ultimately harm We have at least one story of a wife (Michal) who
David, his family, his army, and his entire felt very uncherished and was certainly treated
community. I guess how we behave really does without respect (Remember how he cheated with
matter. Bathsheba? That was very disrespectful.) Perhaps
most damning of all: he refused to be honest and
Thought for today: David covets Bathsheba, and the confess his shortcomings until confronted by
trouble really heats up for this King. For more Nathan.
information on stealing, greed, and coveting see That’s a big problem; when we do harm, and we’re
Exodus 20, Ephesians 4:28 and 5:5. willing to acknowledge it, that’s cool. If we don’t
know we’ve done harm until someone points it out
Thought for tomorrow: I’ve never wanted someone to us, it’s awesome when we take that feedback and
else’s husband; I’m quite happy with the one I’ve handle it humbly. But when we get caught in a
got! But I have wanted other things that didn’t wrong we know we’ve committed, and then we
belong to me. When we desire things that aren’t acknowledge it—that puts everyone in an awkward
ours, we’re doing harm. position. Concerned and wounded parties have to
process whether one has admitted wrongdoing or
August 26 simply gotten caught.

Scripture Reading for today: Jeremiah 50; 2 Samuel Thought for today: Amnon became frustrated to the
13 and 14 point of illness on account of his sister Tamar, for she
was a virgin, and it seemed impossible for him to do
At our house we are in the midst of discussion anything to her…So Amnon… pretended to be ill…”I
about a possible familial character defect. Suffice it would like my sister Tamar to come and make some
to say that a series of events has caused Pete and special bread in my sight, so I may eat from her
me to re‐evaluate some patterns of behaving in our hand.”…Tamar went to the house of her brother
home, and we’re making the necessary adjustments. Amnon, who was lying down…when she took it to
This is clearly and painfully requiring all the 12 steps him to eat, he grabbed her…”Don’t my brother!” she
and a generous helping of humility and faith. said to him…But he refused to listen to her, and since
Harming habits often pass from generation to he was stronger than she, he raped her. 2 Samuel 13,
generation. As we pass down other traits, selected verses NIV
unfortunately, we also manage to teach defects of
character too. My husband has beautiful brown eyes Thought for tomorrow: David had some “issues”
and I have green eyes. Our daughter has stunning with sexual immorality. His son followed suit with his
baby blues. How did that happen? Genetics. Both own issues—ultimately raping his sister and then
her grandfathers’ eyes are blue, so obviously she got hating her after the rape more than he had loved her
those two recessive genes. Our boys have green to before the encounter. Even with several
greenish‐blue eyes; no one got those pretty brown opportunities to make this very harmful encounter
eyes. And that’s the way it goes. We don’t often find less harming, Amnon refused to right his wrong. The
ourselves in control of what the next generation family responds to this outrage without confronting
receives from us. Amnon directly, without providing appropriate
Eye color is no big deal, but passing down a assistance to Tamar, and without David being willing
harming habit is huge. In today’s reading, we’re to intervene and encourage his family to make
beginning to observe the reaping and sowing in the necessary changes. Harming ways are inevitable.
life of David and his family. David had a lot of People mess up. But once we become desperately
169
devoted followers of Christ, we have the capacity to Two observations: from my perspective, the
not only change but to experience transformation. husband is making a reasonable choice in light of
The process is painful. It requires honesty; current circumstances, and I’m not convinced my
confession and correction are essential. Healthy friend truly realizes how much harm she’s caused.
families are not problem‐free; they are families who
don’t run from their problems. Our family is working Thought for today: For a couple of passages related
on ours not because we particularly want to but to handling our finances, check out Proverbs 6:1‐5
because we need to if we’re going to live God’s and Matthew 6:19‐34.
grand epic adventure for us. I pray today that your
family will enter into the process and allow God to Thought for tomorrow: Yesterday we discussed the
have His way with you!! awkwardness that occurs when a person is caught in
wrongdoing without first confessing. My friend got
August 27 caught. She is not helping rebuild trust by continuing
to act like she is the victim. One way to combat the
Scripture Reading for today: Jeremiah 51; 2 Samuel suspicion of family members who naturally question
15 and 16 a wrong‐doer’s sincerity is to become willing to
make amends. That means both acknowledging
I have a girlfriend who has a trust issue with her wrong (without minimizing or excusing) and making
beloved husband. He doesn’t trust her. She’s upset restitution. Call me crazy, but I think financial
about this sad state of affairs. She thinks he is being mismanagement of such huge proportions deserves
judgmental and critical; I suspect he believes he’s some consequences and appropriate checks and
trying to preserve the financial well‐being of his balances for future financial situations. One way to
family. test our own progress in the willingness department
Here’s what happened. My girlfriend stopped is to see how gracious we are in making restitution.
drinking about ten years ago to the relief of all who How’s it going for you?
loved her. She was not able to be a social drinker;
her drinking was a hazard to society. Sobriety was a August 28
blessed gift to herself, her family and her
community. Scripture Reading for today: Jeremiah 52; 2 Samuel
Everyone assumed that this would bring a halt to 17 and 18
all the harming behaviors that had occurred during
the drinking years. Everyone’s assumption was The life and times of David provide plenty of
wrong. My friend had more than a drinking problem; fodder for wrestling with the messiness of life.
she had a series of maladaptive ways of dealing with David, “a man after God’s own heart,” filled with
her emotions, her problems, and even the faith, blessed by God, given the job of King by God
annoyances of everyday living. Although drinking Himself—what could be better? What kind of life
was a poorly chosen solution to her problems, it was would we expect David to live?
more a symptom of the problem than the cause of Here’s a better question: having turned our own
all the chaos. lives over to the care and control of God, what kind
My friend stopped drinking and started shopping. of life do we expect to live ourselves? Exemplary?
She used all her finely honed skills of secrecy, deceit, Transformed? Righteous? Holy? Pure?
and manipulation to hide her wild and crazy What about those times when we live “less‐than”
spending sprees from her husband ‐ until the lives—when we’re dishonest, treacherous,
creditors came banging on his office door. My friend disrespectful, unkind, greedy, selfish, self‐absorbed,
had accrued an amazing amount of debt and mean‐spirited, vengeful?
managed to drain virtually all their assets without As we read through 2 Samuel, notice how David
her husband’s noticing. continues to show us that loving God does not
Now she’s mad that he doesn’t trust her with the guarantee that we will always successfully model
charge cards or the checkbook. God’s love for others. David didn’t deal well with the
170
rape of Tamar, the eventual revenge of Absalom on So, yes, we’re all capable of acting pretty
Amnon (something that wouldn’t have been an issue wretched. But that’s not the central point. The
if David had dealt with Amnon’s sin himself), and central point is that the coming of Jesus has made it
Absalom’s attempted coup against his dad, David. possible for our wretchedness not to be the
I don’t know what to say about all this messy living determining factor of our fate. When we accept the
except this: we are completely incapable of saving mercies of Christ, we’re also accepting His
following all the rules, being right, doing right, and offer of freedom. We no longer have to be
not harming others. We mess up. Kings and paupers controlled by our natures, but instead, can allow the
mess up. Bosses and employees mess up. Parents Holy Spirit to guide, direct, counsel, and confront us.
and children mess up. I’m glad I don’t have to put my hope in how I or
Everyone messes up with stunning regularity. No others behave! How about you? Are you willing to
one gets it right all the time. allow The Spirit of God to guide you?

Thought for today: “And I know that nothing good August 29
lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature. I want to do
what is right, but I can’t. I want to do what is good, Scripture Reading for today: 2 Samuel 19 and 20
but I don’t. I don’t want to do what is wrong, but I
do it anyway…I have discovered this principle of life – If we’ve gotten this far in our devotional series on
that when I want to do what is right, I inevitably do the eighth step and are still confused about who
what is wrong. I love God’s law with all my heart. But needs to go on our list, let me offer a suggestion.
there is another power within me that is at war with Listen to the small and large things that the people
my mind…Oh, what a miserable person I am! Who that love you and have displayed massive amounts
will free me from this life that is dominated by sin of loyalty to you tell you about yourself. Often in
and death?” Romans 7:18, 19, 21, 22, 23, 24 NLT their gentle or direct words, we can gain insights into
how others perceive us. Sometimes hidden harm
Thought for tomorrow: A dear friend of mine waits to be discovered if we’re willing to pay a bit
reminded me of this chapter this morning. After the more attention to the feedback we’re receiving.
morning I’ve had, it couldn’t come at a better time! David got some feedback after the Absalom
As Liz says, if the story ends at Romans 7:24, we may debacle. You’ll recall that Absalom fought to
as well all just give up. But the story doesn’t end dethrone his father, King David, and the king’s army
with “Oh, what a miserable person I am!” defeated Absalom’s assault and killed Absalom in the
process. David’s response was to publicly grieve the
“Thank God! The answer is in Jesus Christ our Lord. loss of his son (the same son he had ignored for
So you see how it is: In my mind I really want to obey years). One can only imagine how devastating it was
God’s law, but because of my sinful nature I am a for the men who had put their own lives in harm’s
slave to sin.” (Romans 7:24) This is true for kings and way to see their King mourning the loss of the man
regular guys like us! But it’s not the only truth—not they had to kill in defense of the king.
even the most important truth. Listen to this: “So
now there is no condemnation for those who belong Thought for today: “Then Joab went to the king’s
to Christ Jesus. And because you belong to him, the room and said to him, “We saved your life today and
power of the life‐giving Spirit has freed you from the the lives of your sons, your daughters, and your
power of sin that leads to death. The law of Moses wives and concubines. Yet you act like this, making
was unable to save us because of the weakness of us feel ashamed of ourselves. You seem to love those
our sinful nature. So God did what the law could not who hate you and hate those who love you.” 2
do. He sent his own Son in a body like the bodies we Samuel 19:5‐6 NLT
sinners have. And in that body God declared an end
to sin’s control over us by giving his son as a sacrifice Thought for tomorrow: Listen to the people who
for our sins.” Romans 8:1‐3 NLT love you, hold your tongue, and try to beat down
your natural inclination to defend your own
171
reputation. Sometimes we do indeed act like we love classic, It’s a Wonderful Life? In the closing scenes
those who hate us and hate those who love us. Isn’t Jimmy Stewart figures out that he is free to tell the
that sad? truth about his past sins, because his past sins are
already forgiven and he is finally free. He is free to
August 30 tell the truth and free to accept God’s great gifts and
grand epic adventures. Jimmy Stewart dreamed that
Scripture Reading for today: 2 Samuel 21 and 22 his adventures would involve world travel and doing
great things. His vision was clouded, and for years he
David’s song of praise in chapter 22 is a reminder missed the grand epic adventure God was giving him
to us all of the faithfulness of God. I used to wonder each day. Finally, broken and wretched, Stewart
about David’s personal commentary on God’s found forgiveness and freedom on one snowy
rescue: “He led me to a place of safety; he rescued Christmas Eve. If you’ve never watched this great
me because he delights in me. The Lord rewarded me movie, you’re missing out! Watch it and see if there
for doing right; he restored me because of my might be a truth tucked in that script for you. Notice
innocence for I have kept the ways of the Lord; I have his joy over his broken banister, his impending jail
not turned from my God to follow evil. I have sentence, his drafty house, even the attack of his
followed all his regulations; I have never abandoned enemies. Discover as Stewart did that grand epic
his decrees. I am blameless before God; I have kept adventures can only be seen through the eyes of a
myself from sin. The Lord rewarded me for doing clear conscience. You too can have this worldview.
right. He has seen my innocence.” 2 Samuel 22:20‐25 Make today a day when you’re willing to find your
NLT freedom.
Hmmm. Really? I don’t think so. Murder, adultery,
and bad parenting all are indicators of failure to August 31
follow all the regulations and abandoning some of
God’s decrees. Scripture Reading for today: 2 Samuel 23 and 24
The Lord rewarded David and restored him
because of who God is, not because David always David repeated his harming ways until the day he
got it right. We indeed are told that we can stand died. I wonder what difference it would have made if
blameless before the throne of grace, but not he had worked through a 12‐step model? In point of
because we’ve figured out how to follow all God’s fact, he did work through steps one, two, three,
laws. We are declared blameless because Jesus, the four, and even five; we can find evidence in scripture
Son of God, did right, was innocent, and never for those steps.
abandoned God’s decrees. Our holy, blameless state What I can’t find (which doesn’t mean he didn’t do
is a gift from the only one who truly lived that state it, it just means it isn’t recorded) is attempts on
of humble, loving obedience. David’s part to healthily deal with the harm he did to
So if you’re trying to figure out a way to think that his family and others.
you’re getting it all right all the time, let it rest. It’s It’s my prayer that today you will be inspired by
OK. Being blameless has already been done. We can David’s inaction and take action in your own life to
embrace our harming ways without fear of avert the repetition of harming ways. I hope today
condemnation. We can do this. Not because we’re will be a day when you are both willing and able to
good, but because we are forgiven. make your list of harms done.

Thought for today: “Be kind and compassionate to Thought for today: “Dear friends, since God so loved
one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ us, we also ought to love one another. No one has
God forgave you.” Ephesians 4:32 NIV ever seen God; but if we love one another, God lives
in us and his love is made complete in us.” 1 John
Thought for tomorrow: If I could give you a gift, it 4:11‐12 NIV
would be the gift of clarity regarding God’s
forgiveness. Have you ever watched the movie
172
Thought for tomorrow: Until we can figure out how STEP 9 We made direct amends to such people
to love one another, we are clouding others’ views wherever possible, except when to do so would
of God. We were created to be a light that shines, injure them or others.
not a storm cloud dumping destruction on those we
were created to love. May we all learn what it means September 1
to receive God’s love so that we can love each other.
May God’s love live in us and be made complete. Scripture Reading for today: Lamentations 1 and 2;
1 Kings 1

I know a secret. I know how you can get rich quick.
It won’t cost you a penny of investment capital, nor
does it require travel. You don’t have to concern
yourself with an IRS audit, nor will anyone force you
to do anything illegal, immoral, or fattening.
All you have to do is deal with the issue of
forgiveness. Whether the offender or the offended,
both parties must agree to deal with the issue of
forgiveness. In my experience, remorseful offenders
tell me their greatest desire is to be forgiven. The
offended share that they would love to know that
those who have hurt them really “get it.” The one
thing offended people say to me most often is that
they desire with all their hearts to know that the
harmer truly understands the extent to which their
offense has hurt them.
Before you rush off and send a text message
intended to clear up the unsettled feeling of wrongs
that haven’t been addressed, you should pause to
prepare. The only thing worse than unforgiveness
sitting awkwardly between two parties is an amends
gone bad.

Thought for today: “Fools mock at making amends
for sin, but goodwill is found among the upright.”
Proverbs 14:9 NIV

Thought for tomorrow: Who among us doesn’t
desire to be “upright?” In order to have that
description fit our profile, we need to know four
things when it comes to forgiveness: 1. Know when
we’ve done wrong, 2. Acknowledge when we’ve
been wrong, 3. Know how to make amends, and 4.
know how to forgive appropriately.
We’ll be covering all these topics in this month’s
devotional series.

173
September 2 forgive, and in so doing, transfer this case to a higher
court.”
Scripture Reading for today: Lamentations 3 and 4;
1 Kings 2 Thought for today: “Dear friends, never take
revenge. Leave that to the righteous anger of God.
“Are you kidding me? You expect me to forgive?” For the Scriptures say, ‘I will take revenge; I will pay
“No, I am not asking you to forgive; I’m asking you them back,’ says the Lord.” Romans 12:19 NLT
to study the process. After you’ve considered all the
information about the concept of forgiveness, you Thought for tomorrow: God knows everything. He
can make your own decision about what to do next.” knows the back story. He knows the motives of the
“OK, I can do that. But there is nothing you can tell heart (both offender’s and the offended’s hearts).
me that will convince me I should forgive that lousy, He has all the information. He holds all the cards.
no‐good, you‐know‐who!” He’s got the power. He’s the ultimate judge. If we
I get this; truly, I do. If I were free to share the really want justice dispensed, who’s better
story of abuse, neglect, and broken trust that hides equipped—us or God?
behind my friend’s question, you’d get it too. The
concept of forgiveness is a lot easier to preach if one September 3
doesn’t have the concrete particulars surrounding
some stories of human cruelty. So consider this idea: Scripture Reading for today: Lamentations 5; 1 Kings
forgiveness, at its core, is transferring the offensive 3
case at hand to a higher court.
There’s a particular traffic light in my community “Do you expect me to just pretend nothing
that people run with annoying frequency. Since it happened? Is that what you’re saying?’
lies between my house and my son’s school, I watch “No!”
these traffic‐light runners daily, and I fume every One time someone harmed me to such a degree
time. that denial of wrongdoing was impossible for both of
I’ve been tempted to make a citizen’s arrest. I sit in us. Both the offended (me) and the offender (not me
my turn lane and watch numerous cars bust through in this one incident) were clear that harm had been
the red light, forcing me to wait while I have a green done. Since I make a lot of mistakes, 99% of the time
light! I fantasize during these times about jumping when an issue of offense arises in my life, I can
out of my car into the lane and yelling, “Citizen’s usually find at least 51% of my part in the story. In
arrest! Citizen’s arrest!” I don’t follow through on this rare instance, neither of us could rationalize the
this big dream, because I believe that anyone who’ll harm done by saying I deserved it.
run a red light will not hesitate to run over a middle‐ Amends were made. Forgiveness was offered and
aged lady with a strong southern drawl. accepted.
A far better option will be when our local police A few months passed, and the forgiven offender
force sets up a sting operation and hauls these took me out to lunch and let me have it with both
evildoers before our local judges—whom I trust will barrels. It seems my friend was aggravated that I
throw the book at these bad guys (and gals). hadn’t been forgiving enough. As I asked questions
As much as I would like to make these bad drivers for clarification, I soon realized that my friend
pay, I haven’t got the power to do so. Someone thought that forgiveness meant “Never mind! Just
does; it just isn’t me. forget about it.”
And that’s my point. None of us has the power, That’s not how forgiveness works. Sometimes we
resources, wisdom, or discernment to carry out wrestle through the forgiveness process and our
justice as effectively as Holy God. Forgiveness is relationships are strengthened—and that’s
acknowledging that reality and saying, “Hey, I’m awesome! But that’s not always the case.
going to accept the fact that I am not the ultimate Although I truly believe I forgave my friend, I must
judge here, but I know who is—God. I’m going to admit the entire situation changed the nature of our
relationship. When I forgave, I was acknowledging
174
that I was transferring this case of offensiveness to a I was so darn mad! Why was his sincere effort to ask
higher court: the holy court of God. In essence, I for forgiveness causing such a vitriolic reaction? He
chose to take myself out of the role of jury OR judge, violated every basic principle of the amends process.
and I asked God to have His way with the entire Here’s what went wrong (from my perspective).
mess. • He attempted to initiate an amends process in a
But in the process, I learned a lot about my friend’s public place, at an inconvenient time, and in the
values, judgment, and sense of fair play. That presence of others who were not connected to
information caused me to re‐evaluate the kind of the event.
relationship we truly had. I thought we had an • He said he was sorry, not wrong. I got the
intimate, trusting, safe bond. What I learned is that distinct impression that he could not articulate
we had a social, cordial friendship. Truly, I don’t his wrongdoing (although it was easy for me to
believe our relationship changed so much as I name it as I listened to the story). In response to
changed my perspective on the relationship. That my question, “What do you think you did wrong
changed perspective resulted in a change in my in this situation?” his response was, “I feel
behavior towards my friend, and that’s what my terrible.” That is so annoying.
friend found offensive. • He said he felt bad, not that he had behaved
Forgiving someone is not the same thing as: badly. He seemed far more concerned with how
“never mind,” forgetting, or saying that everything is he felt than how his actions might make me feel.
“just fine.” Forgiveness, as I said earlier, is • He offered no plan for restitution. Amends is
transferring the whole sorry mess to God for His both apology and restitution. An effective
judgment. That said, we are expected to make sound amends covers both contingencies. A brilliant
judgments. Sometimes that requires us to detach amends allows the offended to have input into
with love from people who we have good reason to the restitution process.
believe do not have our best interests at heart. This • He violated the “injure clause” of the ninth step.
is a hard truth. Since I was unaware of his offending ways, his
confession came as quite a shock to me. I’m of
Thought for today: “The perverse stir up dissension, the opinion that he confessed to relieve his own
and gossips separate close friends. The violent entice conscience—not to right a wrong. I think this
their neighbors and lead them down a path that is unexpected and embarrassing confession was
not good. Those who wink with their eyes are more harmful to me than if he had made an
plotting perversity; those who purse their lips are indirect amends (more on that later).
bent on evil.” Proverbs 16:28‐30 NIV What comes next? I desire to offer forgiveness
when needed, but I haven’t actually been asked for
Thought for tomorrow: Don’t confuse the need to forgiveness. I was asked to make someone feel
choose friends wisely with the issue of forgiveness. better! I can’t control anyone’s emotions; I don’t
These are two separate issues. have that kind of power. So now I have a friend who
needs the gift of forgiveness, my hands are full of a
September 4 beautifully wrapped gift of forgiveness, and the two
of us stand in an awkward moment of time—two
Scripture Reading for today: 1 Kings 4 and 5; Ezekiel people wanting what God wants for us ‐ wondering
1 what to do about all our humanity that keeps getting
in the way.
I was so mad I could spit nails. A friend, whom I
dearly love, had really messed up and done Thought for today: “When a man or woman wrongs
something terribly hurtful to me. Since I had no prior another in any way and so is unfaithful to the LORD,
knowledge of his offending behavior, it was not his that person is guilty and must confess the sin he has
offense that had me seeing red for rage. However, committed. He must make full restitution for his
his completely clueless attempt at the amends wrong, add one fifth to it and give it all to the person
process put me in a terrible position, and that’s why he has wronged.” Numbers 5:6‐7 NIV
175
I would have preferred for my friend to come up to
Thought for tomorrow: Here’s the deal. God is me and say, “Teresa, I realize you don’t know this,
mysterious in many ways. We know His ways are but I need to make an amends to you. When would
higher than ours, and there’s a lot about God and His it be convenient for us to meet and talk about this?”
ways that we will never understand on planet earth. At that moment I could have chosen to ask
But He is crystal clear when it comes to forgiveness. questions, schedule an appointment, or suggest that
We are created to be loving, gracious, merciful, and we chat further in a more private setting simply to
forgiving. I want to be the woman God created me provide me with more information.
to be, and so if on the rare occasion I find myself in I actually tried to interrupt my friend’s “spewing,”
the position of the offended (as opposed to the but he would have none of that. He wanted this off
offender, a role that seems to come naturally to me), his chest before he left to go on vacation. That
I WANT TO FORGIVE! I understand the harmful violates a second point of amicable amends‐making:
effects of unforgiveness, bitterness, and festering accommodate the offended. Make it as easy as
anger, and I want not part of them. If I’m going to do possible for them to hear your amends. Choose a
something that isn’t healthy for my body, I want it place that is convenient for them, comfortable for
coated in chocolate and slathered with peanut them, and considerate of them. Even how we
butter! I refuse to waste my mental, physical, approach the process can be the beginning of
spiritual, and emotional well being by being a person restitution.
who harbors resentment. That said, forgiveness can
be a messy undertaking! I am so relieved to know Thought for today: “Above all, love each other
that God is working in us to make us both willing and deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.”
able to do His good, pleasing, and perfect will, 1 Peter 4:8 NIV
because we sure can act like goofs sometimes!
Thought for tomorrow: Making amends is hard on
September 5 both the offender and the offended. Let’s make sure
we do everything possible to increase the odds that
Scripture Reading for today: 1 Kings 6 and 7; Ezekiel the outcome of this experience will be positive for
2 everyone.

In yesterday’s devotional I discussed an amends September 6
attempt that got messy. So let’s take a few days and
break down the process of amends. Perhaps we can Scripture Reading for today: 1 Kings 8; Ezekiel 3 and
keep from making our own messy amends and 4
causing a bad situation to get worse.
The best amends is face to face. Sometimes a Once in a while it is not possible to make a direct
letter or a phone call is the next best thing. Ask God amends. Other times a direct amends would cause
to give you the discernment necessary to decide more injury. An indirect amend is appropriate for
how to approach the person you have harmed. someone who is deceased or otherwise inaccessible.
However you choose to initiate an amends, please Letters written and not mailed, prayers to God, or
think about the other person’s perspective. This isn’t changes in behavior are all acceptable ways to make
about you. an indirect amend. I recall a friend who felt terrible
Tip: Don’t startle them. In yesterday’s example of about how he had behaved with a young woman
amends gone wrong, I was startled. My friend came sexually. He prayed and prayed about how to make
up to me in a very public setting and told me about amends. Eventually, he decided that a direct amend
something he had done to harm me, which took me might cause more harm, and so he opted for the
completely by surprise. I had no knowledge of this indirect approach. Although he didn’t feel it was in
offense. People were standing around while he her best interest to approach her, he made a
spilled his guts. It was embarrassing. decision to relate differently to all women in the
future as a silent and very private amends to this
176
unnamed woman. He also confessed his wrongdoing Sometimes in our “sorriness” we wail and gnash
to a trusted accountability team and submitted to our teeth in distress. More drama doesn’t make for a
their suggestions for restitution. This man regularly better apology! In our shame‐based “I’m sorry”
makes generous donations to organizations that aid place, sometimes we fall all over ourselves and
sexually abused women. confess anything and everything for the sake of
Now as a father with a daughter of his own, he placating the person we have harmed. Making an
models in attitude, word, and deed a deep and effective apology isn’t about confessing that which is
profound respect for women. He speaks up if not true.
someone treats a woman like an object. He regularly Humans make mistakes, and some of them are
shares his own past failure when it seems helpful for whoppers. Admitting a mistake is good. But that is
another man in a similar situation to hear the story. not the same as saying, “Hey, I am a sorry person.” A
This guy has made his life a living amends. That’s heartfelt apology will include a deeply remorseful
pretty cool. expression of regret. That’s humbling, but it doesn’t
require groveling.
Thought for today: “Yes, each of us will have to give It takes more character and integrity to go to a
a personal account to God. So don’t condemn each person and tell them the exact nature of the wrong
other anymore. Decide instead to live in such a way done than to grovel with an expression of regret that
that you will not put an obstacle in another is ill‐defined.
Christian’s path. May God, who gives this patience Be specific. Name the wrong, and accept specific
and encouragement, help you life in complete responsibility.
harmony with each other—each with the attitude of
Christ Jesus toward the other. Then all of you can join Thought for today: “Because the Sovereign Lord
together with one voice giving praise and glory to helps me, I will not be disgraced. Therefore have I set
God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. So accept my face like flint, and I know I will not be put to
each other just as Christ has accepted you; then God shame. He who vindicates me is near.” Isaiah 50:7
will be glorified.” Romans 14:12‐13, 15:5‐7NIV NIV

Thought for tomorrow: This is a tricky step; it’s easy Thought for tomorrow: Let’s not complicate the
to be more concerned about self‐preservation than amends process by trying to deal with all our deep‐
about reconciliation and restitution. I hope before seated issues of shame at the same time. Make the
you trust in your own wisdom you’ll seek wise amends. Realize that our fear of shame and
counsel, if you have an amends to make that has any condemnation is a separate issue best dealt with in a
potential to injure others. different venue. If shame and condemnation stalk
you relentlessly, get some guidance from God and
September 7 others. But don’t let the desire to avoid those
misguided feelings keep you from doing the next
Scripture Reading for today: 1 Kings 9 and 10; right thing.
Ezekiel 5
September 8
In Power to Choose, Mike O’Neil describes the
amends process in two steps: apology and Scripture Reading for today: 1 Kings 11; Ezekiel 6
restitution. and 7
Apology = “I was wrong when I _____________.”
We sometimes express apology with “I am sorry.” The second part of the amends process, according
That’s ambiguous. What are we saying when we say to Mike O’Neill in Power To Choose, is restitution.
sorry? Are we sorry we got caught? Are we feeling Restitution = “What can I do to make this right?”
like sorry, no‐good louses? Are we sorry that Just saying sorry isn’t enough, nor is it enough to
someone is mad at us? Are we sorry we have to deal decide for yourself how to make it right. An apology
with this issue? without restitution is not an amends. Sometimes
177
restitution takes place before the amends. O’Neill I think it is helpful to pause to prepare and really
illustrates this beautifully in his workbook, Power To consider our motivation before proceeding with a
Choose. For example, if you know you’ve wronged ninth step. The only acceptable reason for making
your children and ex‐spouse by not providing child amends is to right previous wrongs—your previous
support, pay up. If you can’t pay it all, pay as much wrongs.
as you can every month. Get rid of all‐or‐nothing Once Pete and I had a disagreement over
thinking; do what you can. And here’s a suggestion: something small that escalated into harming. Pete is
Get real about what you can really afford. I wouldn’t an excellent amends‐maker; me, not so much. But
expect you to be able to afford big boy or girl toys this time I set aside my pouty ways and approached
for yourself if you owe child support. I wouldn’t think my husband with both apology and the offer of
you’d be eating out when you haven’t paid so that restitution. He accepted and my step nine was
your kid can eat at all. done…almost.
You may need to earn the right to apologize “Is there anything YOU want to say?” I asked.
through the path of good‐faith restitution. “Nope.” He replied.
Sometimes you can make the apology and then Boy was I mad. I wanted an apology back! It’s no
make restitution. Listen to what the offended has to wonder I’ve come to understand my limited amends‐
say about restitution. This isn’t about what you think making skills! My mad response revealed that I had
is appropriate, but what they think is meaningful. (If made amends but with the wrong motive. I wanted
the offended suggests that you do anything illegal, something back. If you are hoping to get anything
immoral, or fattening, then you know you’ve got an back from this process, hold up the amends.
offended party who needs some guidance. Don’t be The only thing a step nine is supposed to
a fool. If their suggestion strikes you as accomplish is taking personal responsibility and
inappropriate, seek wise counsel before proceeding.) going to any appropriate lengths possible to right a
previous wrong.
Thought for today: “When a man or woman wrongs Don’t let this beautiful step become an
another in any way and so is unfaithful to the LORD, opportunity to have our resentments squirting out
that person is guilty and must confess the sin he has and causing further injury. Both my friend and I got
committed. He must make full restitution for his our mixed motives into the middle of our amends‐
wrong, add one fifth to it and give it all to the person making and made a big old mess of things. I’m glad
he has wronged.” Numbers 5:6‐7 NIV we both have a God who is merciful and gracious.

Thought for tomorrow: How awesome would it be if Thought for today: “You have heard that it was said,
all of us were busy about doing the work of ‘Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I tell
reconciliation? you: Love your enemies and pray for those who
persecute you.” Matthew 5:43‐44 NIV
September 9
Thought for tomorrow: I pray that as we practice
Scripture Reading for today: 1 Kings 12 and 13; making and receiving amends that we will be
Ezekiel 8 gracious to each other, loving each other in spite of
our limitations. It’s process not perfection. But for
A few days ago I told a story about someone who heaven’s sake, let’s keep progressing!
attempted and failed to make an amends to me.
Don’t get me wrong; this guy sincerely tried. He told September 10
me how he had prayed long and hard before
approaching me. I believe him. But there was a Scripture Reading for today: 1 Kings 14; Ezekiel 9
serious disconnect, because he did indeed cause and 10
more injury—even though I know it was not his
intent. Yesterday I recommended that part of the “pause
to prepare” process of amends‐making involves a
178
motive checkup. This seems to be a very, very “So tell me how it feels to take advantage of me,
difficult proposition. So here are a few questions to from your perspective?”
meditate over: Gulp. I don’t think she was expecting someone so
• Do I have a loving and forgiving attitude in this naïve to get the connection. She stops laughing and
process? averts her gaze.
• Can I make this amends without blaming the other When we do wrong, we are guilty; that is how it
person in any way? works. Sometimes our guilt feelings are delayed, but
• Am I focused only on my part? that doesn’t matter. What does matter is that we
• Am I willing to take full responsibility for my part? are guilty when we injure another. God gave us an
• Have I given up any expectation of a specific internal system to help us understand our
response from this person? wrongdoing: the feeling of guilt in our gut. My
• Have I put my trust in God that He will guide me companion has ignored, medicated, disguised, and
through this process, no matter what the run from her guilt for many years. She’s gone so far
outcome? as to assume that anyone who pays attention to
• Do I need to delay this process and redo step four “guilt” is silly. Of course, that makes her very foolish.
due to continued resentment or fear? The absence of guilt is not an indicator of an
unconventional lifestyle; it’s a characteristic that
Thought for today: We love because he first loved experts attribute to sociopaths.
us. If anyone says, “I love God,” yet hates his brother,
he is a liar. For anyone who does not love his brother, Thought for today: Fools make fun of guilt, but the
whom he has seen, cannot love God, whom he has godly acknowledge it and seek reconciliation.
not seen. 1 John 4:19‐21 NIV Proverbs 14:9 NLT

Thought for tomorrow: Step nine is not designed to Thought for tomorrow: Why do I make this point in
make us feel better; it is placed in the recovery the middle of a monthly devotional series on
process to help us live better. We may or may not amends? Because I think we hate feeling guilty too. I
get a warm, fuzzy reception when we make our know I don’t like that sinking feeling in my
amends. So what? We’re stepping as God speaks. I stomach—the jittery sense of unease that comes
pray knowing that is enough. with the awareness of wrongdoing. But this is
crucial: the fact that we can feel guilt is a blessing.
September 11 It’s a good thing and a God thing. People who care
when they get it wrong have at least a fighting
Scripture Reading for today: 1 Kings 15 and 16; chance of learning how to get it right. If you’re
Ezekiel 11 feeling guilty about something, thank God! You’re
one of the fortunate ones!
By all outward appearances, she was on a roll. She
was poking fun at people who lead “conventional September 12
lives.” I asked her what she meant by conventional.
“You know, ‘do gooders.’ People who waste their Recommended reading: 1 Kings 17 and 18
life following society’s rules.”
“You think ‘do gooders’ are naïve—easy marks?” A few days ago I concluded our devotional reading
“Yeah, I guess.” She snickers. “You know it. Hey, with this comment: “Step nine is not designed to
you do it—with your talk of God and taking the next make us feel better, it is placed in the recovery
right step. There’s no next right step; you process to help us live better. We may or may not
conventional types think there is, but that’s not true. get a warm, fuzzy reception when we make our
Feeling bad for living life on your own terms is for amends.”
suckers. You do what you gotta do.” Her eyes met
mine with a steady, challenging stare. Although I believe that statement is true, I’m not
sure it’s complete. It is true that step nine isn’t about
179
us – it’s about us making a wrong as right as hopped up and took the bait. What happened next
humanly possible. That’s the point. However, an was the big surprise.
amends properly done and graciously received
MAKES US FEEL AWESOME! And in spite of that Once we boarded, the steward came on the speaker
awesome feeling totally NOT being the point – it is a and announced with great cheer that we could not
blessing ‐ undeserved? You bet! Nevertheless, take off until someone agreed to deplane and take
sometimes an effective step nine results in us feeling another flight. It seems the plane was “too heavy.” I
like the weight of the world has been lifted off our fretted when a petite young woman gallantly gave
shoulders. up her seat for the good of the group. I would have
preferred that the really large man taking up his seat
Never under estimate the benefits that come from and half of mine exit – that would have really
living life on God’s terms. reduced the weight on the plane! No sooner had this
teeny tiny girl departed then on walked a pilot for
Thought for today: …if he gives what he took in this airline – AND HE TOOK HER PLACE! The man in
pledge for a loan, returns what he has stolen, follows front of me said what we all were thinking, “He looks
the decrees that give life, and does no evil, he will a lot heavier than the young lady you just kicked
surely life; he will not die. None of the sins he has off!”
committed will be remembered against him. He has
done what is just and right; he will surely live. Ezekiel What injustice (I thought)! Someone should
33:15‐16 NIV complain about this on behalf of the young women
who was tricked into giving up her seat! This plane
Thought for tomorrow: Take a few moments to wasn’t too heavy – they needed the seat. Personally,
pray, asking the Holy Spirit to guide you. Ask for the I would have preferred a more honest approach –
good sense and discernment to truly get a picture of they could have just come clean and told us they had
how unresolved offenses are weighing you down. a pilot to get to another airport. But as we headed
Picture each unmade amends as a five pound weight toward home, another thought took shape.
placed firmly on your back. Imagine what it will be
like to have each weight lifted gently from your The young woman who gave up her seat so that the
shoulders by the loving hands of God. Dream of rest of us could get home, hug our loved ones and
what might be – a day when you have gone to any sleep in our own beds benefits from her decision in
lengths to clean up your side of the street. Consider ways we can’t imagine. Her spiritual muscles got a
how much easier standing straight and lifting your hefty workout as she made a weighty decision –
head is going to feel without all those heavy weights giving up her right to a seat she could have clung to.
dragging you down. Thank God that you are at a I don’t know what led her to make this decision nor
place in your life where you have all that you need to do I know her spiritual condition. This I know.
equip you to do the next right thing. Whether she understands it or not, on this day, she
laid down her life for others. She acted unselfishly
September 13 while the rest of us tightened our seatbelts and
practically dared anyone to try to oust us from our
Recommended reading: 1 Kings 19 and 20 seats.
Recently on a flight home from a weekend of fun Thought for today: Who is going to harm you if you
with my daughter, I watched the drama unfold as an are eager to do good? But even if you should suffer
airline coped with the dilemma of “over‐booking.” for what is right, you are blessed. 1 Peter 3:13 NIV
Although our airplane sat on the tarmac ready and
willing to be boarded, no one was allowed to take Thought for tomorrow: Perceived injustice can
their seat until three people agreed to get ignite our self‐righteous indignation AND diminish
“bumped.” Promised a free round trip ticket, several our capacity to do the next right thing. In my rush to
judgment, it was easy to overlook my own tight grip
180
on the arm rests. Who was the greater offender? we need to make amends and instead presume this
The steward doing her job, or me, refusing to instruction doesn’t apply, we’re moving into the
sacrifice my early flight home for the sake of category of foolishness. Not only does it matter how
another? I wonder if you have examples in your life we behave, it matters how we treat others. God said
where you can quickly point fingers and condemn this. We must deal with whether we choose to
bad behaving – legitimate bad behaving – and in follow or not.
doing so, miss an opportunity to see yourself
accurately. My prayer is that we refocus our Thought for today: Live wisely among those who are
attention on our own harming ways and not not Christians, and make the most of every
distracted by the foibles of others. We have been opportunity. Let your conversation be gracious and
given clear instructions: if we do harm – make effective so that you will have the right answer for
amends, quickly. Let’s get busy. everyone. Colossians 4:5‐6 NIV
September 14 Thought for tomorrow: Making amends is what
desperately devoted followers of Christ do. Why?
Recommended reading: 1 Kings 21 and 22 Because we follow where Christ leads. In your prayer
time today, I ask you to think about how many
“I don’t see how that applies to me.” excuses Christ could have used to avoid the Cross.
Instead, he entrusted himself to God. Maybe you
Over the years, I’ve been tempted to make a bumper think making an amends to someone who owes you
sticker with that phrase emblazoned on it. Lots and a few amends back is crazy. Perhaps every fiber of
lots of us believe that rules are made for other your being rejects the idea. I don’t care. Do it. Get
people. We like it when people are polite and wait wise counsel, pause to prepare, plan thoroughly –
patiently in line – behind us. But sometimes our busy but do it.
schedules crowd out our sense of fair play and we
wait in line tapping our feet and sighing profusely. September 15
We believe that all people should be treated with
respect; kindness, gentleness and self‐control are all Scripture Reading for today: 1 Kings 17 and 18;
hallmarks of desperately devoted followers of Christ. Ezekiel 12
But let that waiter mess up our order and see how A few days ago I concluded our devotional reading
respectful, kind, gentle and self‐controlled a with this comment: “Step nine is not designed to
response we make when the hapless guy shows up make us feel better, it is placed in the recovery
with all the wrong stuff! process to help us live better. We may or may not
get a warm, fuzzy reception when we make our
“Look, I’m through with all that performance stuff. I amends.”
know God loves me unconditionally. I don’t have to Although I believe that statement is true, I’m not
follow a set of rules to earn God’s love.” True, all sure it’s complete. It is true that step nine isn’t about
true! But think of it like this. We shouldn’t be us; it’s about us making a wrong as right as humanly
presumptuous! God’s unconditional love is his gift to possible. That’s the point. However, an amends
us; how we obey His commands are a reflection of properly done and graciously received makes us feel
our love for him. awesome! And in spite of that awesome feeling
totally NOT being the point—it is a blessing. Is it
Followers of Christ are supposed to FOLLOW!!!! So undeserved? You bet! Nevertheless, sometimes an
as we read what scripture has to say about how we effective step nine results in us feeling like the
are to behave – IT ALL APPLIES TO US!!!! weight of the world has been lifted off our
shoulders.
And when we take the attitude that it does not Never underestimate the benefits that come from
apply, we are putting ourselves in jeopardy of living life on God’s terms.
needing to make amends. On those occasions when
181
Thought for today: …if he gives what he took in brother; then come and offer your gift. Matthew
pledge for a loan, returns what he has stolen, follows 5:23‐24 NIV
the decrees that give life, and does no evil, he will Wow. Can you believe that? Folks who feel hurt by
surely live; he will not die. None of the sins he has “the church” tell me that they believe that God (and
committed will be remembered against him. He has his church by proxy) only want them for their
done what is just and right; he will surely live. Ezekiel money. That’s not what Matthew 5 reports. Clearly,
33:15‐16 NIV God cares more about how we love each other than
he does about how many alms we toss on His altar.
Thought for tomorrow: Take a few moments to pray The guy on the plane doesn’t understand why he’s
and ask the Holy Spirit to guide you. Ask for the good lonely; he believes his “alms” tossed on altars, at his
sense and discernment to truly get a picture of how wife and five kids, and flashed in front of business
unresolved offenses are weighing you down. Picture associates, should give him all that he wants. Sadly,
each unmade amends as a five‐pound weight placed he’s wrong.
firmly on your back. Imagine what it will be like to God tells us that one key to acquiring all that we
have each weight lifted gently from your shoulders perceive we lack is learning how to play well with
by the loving hands of God. Dream of what might be: others. This involves having a plan (and executing it)
a day when you have gone to any lengths to clean up when inevitably a relationship hits a bump in the
your side of the street. Consider how much easier road. Translation: You gotta know how to make
standing straight and lifting your head is going to amends when you mess up.
feel without all those heavy weights dragging you
down. Thank God that you are at a place in your life Thought for today: This is how I want you to conduct
where you have all that you need to equip you to do yourself in these matters. If you enter your place of
the next right thing. worship and, about to make an offering, you
suddenly remember a grudge a friend has against
September 16 you, abandon your offering, leave immediately, go to
this friend and make things right. Then and only
Scripture Reading for today: 1 Kings 19 ‐ 22 then, come back and work things out with God.
Matthew 5:23‐24 The Message
In a previous devotional I told a story about an
encounter I had with a very grumpy, arrogant, and Thought for tomorrow: Abandon your
lonely man on a plane. This guy was sad. Perhaps the offering…leave immediately…go to this friend…make
listener who wasn’t paying attention would hear the things right…then and only then, come back and
story and think that this was a workaholic with a work things out with God. Pray on this. Think about
dysfunctional family, and that could be the point of this. Take time to process God’s deep desire and
his life story. But what I heard was the voice of a commitment to amends‐making. He prefers that to
man disconnected from his God. our offerings and to our worship attendance. Think
My new acquaintance would disagree with me. about the implications of such a huge desire….As you
Included in his storytelling was a paragraph on his can imagine, my seat buddy was quite startled when
family’s church involvement and generous giving to I shared these implications with him!
good causes. But I know from personal experience
that church attendance and sacrificial giving don’t September 17
accurately measure one’s relationship with God.
Church attendance and giving measure how we Scripture Reading for today: 2 Kings 1 ‐ 3
spend our Sundays and what we do with a portion of
that money. Continuing the story from yesterday’s devotional…
Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar As the pilots began our descent into Dallas, my
and there remember that your brother has seatmate rallied with one final comment in response
something against you, leave your gift there in to my soliloquy on the amends process. “I see your
front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to your point, and I think you’re right—to a point. But the
182
timing isn’t right for me to talk about the past with September 18
my wife. She’s been to a lawyer; can you believe it? I
could put myself in a vulnerable position. Maybe I Scripture Reading for today: 2 Kings 4 ‐ 6
can deal with this stuff later.”
I hope so. I’m just wondering about what might I didn’t grow up knowing the word of God, so I’ve
happen while he’s waiting around to feel less spent my adulthood playing “catch up” when it
“vulnerable.” What conclusions might his wife and comes to the study of scripture. It’s been a grand
children be drawing from his inaction? What bitter adventure with a number of miscues of
seeds of resentment are being sown into the hearts interpretation and application as I’ve learned.
of his family? Will anyone’s faith be shattered or But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend
shaken as a result of this bitter but regular‐church‐ to them without expecting to get anything back.
attending man’s confusing inconsistencies—a man Then your reward will be great, and you will be sons
who has a form of religion but denies its basic tenet of the Most High, because he is kind to the
(make amends when necessary)? ungrateful and wicked. Luke 6:35 NIV
This is serious stuff. As I lugged my bright green The first dozen or so times I ran into this passage, I
luggage, computer bag, and trendy purse through was amazed that God would expect me to be kind to
DFW airport, I had larger concerns. I was wondering the ungrateful and wicked—an apt description for
if there were any examples of unmade amends in my anyone I considered an enemy. I used this as an
own life that might leave another shattered, shaken, excuse NOT to make amends to anyone whom I
or otherwise harmed. considered a foe. I figured God would be kind to
them, and maybe when I was really old, I’d mature
Thought for today: . . . Here’s what you need to be spiritually and follow suit. It was a few years before I
concerned about: that you don’t get in the way of realized that the ungrateful and wicked person
someone else, making life more difficult than it referred to in this passage was me.
already is. Romans 14:13 The Message
Thought for today: Then Peter came to Jesus and
Thought for tomorrow: I just got off the phone with asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my
a very distraught child. He wants to know why his brother when he sins against me? Up to seven
dad can be a pastor and continue to visit porn Web times?” Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times,
sites multiple times a day. This kid wants answers. but seventy‐seven times. Therefore, the kingdom of
But you know what really bugs this kid? His dad has heaven is like a king who wanted to settle accounts
demonstrated no remorse, no regret, no with his servants. As he began the settlement, a man
acknowledgement of wrongdoing. I tried to tell this who owed him ten thousand talents (a ton of money)
young man that one doesn’t rush to amends but was brought to him. Since he was not able to pay,
must aggressively step through the first eight steps the master ordered that he and his wife and his
before making amends. I gave him a couple of children and all that he had be sold to repay the
examples of amends gone wrong because someone debt. The servant fell on his knees before him. ‘Be
rushed to do step nine without appropriate patient with me,’ he begged, ‘and I will pay back
preparing. Now the kid is irritated with me. So I hung everything.’ The servant’s master took pity on him,
up the phone and prayed for this family the very cancelled the debt and let him go. But when that
thing I pray for my own (and for yours), “Lord, servant went out, he found one of his fellow servants
increase our faith. Move our feet through the who owed him a hundred denarii (not nearly as
process as fast as our faith can handle. Help us, Lord, much money as ten thousand talents)…‘Pay back
to do no more harm. And Father, protect those what you owe me!’ he demanded. His fellow servant
we’ve harmed. Grant us the gift of a second fell to his knees and begged him. ‘Be patient with
chance—for our sakes and for those we love.” me, and I will pay you back.’ But he refused. Instead,
he went off and had the man thrown into prison until
he could pay the debt. Matthew 18:21‐30 NIV

183
Thought for tomorrow: Loving my enemies (enough and find Joseph is ruling the roost AND the food
to make amends to them when appropriate) is supply in Egypt. For a while they exist in apparent
impossible so long as I hold to the viewpoint that I’m harmony, absent any form of amends. But then dear
an innocent victim being asked to be loving and good old dad dies, and the brothers become afraid. They
(with no expectations) to one who is ungrateful and worry what Joseph is going to do next. It seems they
wicked. But Matthew 18 clarifies the situation. Think believe (falsely) that Joseph is as conniving as they
of the servant’s master as God and yourself as the are, and they expect retribution.
servant with the humongous debt. The “fellow
servant” in this story could be any old garden‐variety Thought for today: So they sent this message to
enemy. Who in this story is ungrateful, wicked and Joseph: “Before your father died, he instructed us to
forgiven by the master (God)? The first servant. Now say to you: ‘Please forgive your brothers for the great
is the picture crystal clear? Because God is kind to wrong they did to you—for their sin in treating you
the ungrateful and wicked (us), shouldn’t that so cruelly.’ So we, the servants of the God of your
change our perspective on willingness to make father, beg you to forgive our sin.” When Joseph
amends? Think about it. The offensive party in this received the message, he broke down and wept.
story is the first servant, who was forgiven a huge Genesis 50:16‐17 NLT
debt and then proceeded to bear a grudge against a
fellow servant who owed him a small debt. Maybe Thought for tomorrow: Knowing all that you know
you’ve been reluctant to pursue the amends process about the amends process, why do you believe
with an enemy. You might have a million excuses for Joseph cried?
why you shouldn’t have to humble yourself and
acknowledge your part in the wrongdoing. If you go September 20
to Matthew 18 and read the rest of the story, you’ll
discover that the unforgiving servant ends up in big, Scripture Reading for today: 2 Kings 10 and 11;
big trouble with the master. If you’ve been like me Ezekiel 13
and made excuses for offenses perpetrated against
an enemy, I hope you’ll rethink your position. After burying Jacob, Joseph returned to Egypt with
his brothers and all who had accompanied him to his
September 19 father’s burial. But now that their father was dead,
Joseph’s brothers became fearful. “Now Joseph will
Scripture Reading for today: 2 Kings 7 ‐ 9; show his anger and pay us back for all the wrong we
did to him,” they said.
One surefire way to blow a perfectly decent So they sent this message to Joseph: “Before your
amends opportunity is to approach the task with father died, he instructed us to say to you: ‘Please
fear. I’m not suggesting that you rush to denial and forgive your brothers for the great wrong they did to
pretend amends‐making is easy. I am suggesting that you – for their sin in treating you so cruelly.’ So we,
unless and until fear is not your primary motivation, the servants of the God of your father, beg you to
you should pause to prepare. For the next couple of forgive our sin.” When Joseph received the message,
devotionals, I want to talk about a biblical example he broke down and wept. Genesis 50:14‐17 NLT
of bad amends‐making. This is speculation, but I want to suggest one
Do you remember the story of Joseph? He’s the possible reason Joseph “broke down and wept.”
guy who was his daddy’s favorite, got a cool coat as Those brothers shamelessly invoked the name of
a gift from his dad, had a dream he’d rule over his their dead father as a shield against Joseph’s anger.
brothers, was stupid enough to relay the dream to That’s a cheap shot. We take cheap shots in the
his brothers—who promptly threw him in a well, amends process when we, motivated by fear, try to
sold him into slavery, and then staged a death scene manipulate our “offended” to have pity on us.
as a cover up for all this bad behaving. Forgiveness is not about an expression of pity. It’s
Over time, more stuff happens to Joseph, and about getting it. It’s about understanding the nature
eventually his brothers come to Egypt seeking food of the offense; it was huge. It’s about knowing that
184
the offender had only his or her interests at heart • and perhaps saddest of all: his brothers didn’t
and was both willing and able to hurt someone else know him at all.
in the process. I wonder if Joseph shared this viewpoint, and it
When we try to elicit a pitying declaration of grieved him.
forgiveness, we’re not only taking a cheap shot,
we’re underestimating the power of God to work in Thought for today: “I pray that your love for each
and through another person. These goofballs should other will overflow more and more, and that you will
have given their brother a chance to forgive them keep on growing in your knowledge and
straight up. All would have been blessed in the understanding. For I want you to understand what
process. really matters, so that you may live pure and blames
lives until Christ returns.” Philippians 1:9‐10 NLT
Thought for today: “Joseph broke down and wept.”
Thought for tomorrow: Joseph’s brothers were big
Thought for tomorrow: An effective step nine goofs, stunted in their growth and limited in their
causes no harm. These brothers failed to understand understanding. Unfortunately, that happens to us
this concept. How about you? Do you get it? when we refuse to step as God speaks. Joseph,
separated from family, friends, and his religious
September 21 heritage, continued to grow in knowledge and
understanding in spite of the atrocities perpetrated
Scripture Reading for today: 2 Kings 12 and 13; against him. So as you’re considering whether or not
Ezekiel 14 to extend or ask for forgiveness, I urge you to keep
these siblings in your thoughts. I believe that even
After burying Jacob, Joseph returned to Egypt with the best families, coolest friends, and greatest
his brothers and all who had accompanied him to his church communities cannot provide immunity from
father’s burial. But now that their father was dead, foolishness—if in our inner selves, we know we’re
Joseph’s brothers became fearful. “Now Joseph will living independently of God. However, even with
show his anger and pay us back for all the wrong we unfortunate circumstances and limited resources,
did to him,” they said. when we make the decision to step as God speaks,
So they sent this message to Joseph: “Before your we can grow in knowledge and understanding. This
father died, he instructed us to say to you: ‘Please is something to consider…
forgive your brothers for the great wrong they did to
you – for their sin in treating you so cruelly.’ So we, September 22
the servants of the God of your father, beg you to
forgive our sin.” When Joseph received the message, Scripture Reading for today: 2 Kings 14 and 15;
he broke down and wept. Genesis 50:14‐17 NLT Ezekiel 15
I wonder if Joseph wept over all the lost years
wasted on hidden agendas, suspicious paranoia, and “All I wanted to do was make it right!” He laments
superficial, faux relationships. Joseph was a godly after a disastrous attempt to complete his step‐nine
man who survived many trying times and thrived in assignment. (Let me be clear: his sponsor did not
spite of them. This man had discernment; he was give this assignment. He took it upon himself to
clever; he stepped as God spoke. Surely as soon as tackle this step out of order.)
his brothers presented him with this speech that “Are you surprised by the response you received?”
obviously was a clumsy attempt to avoid retribution, I asked.
Joseph understood the implications. He understood: “Absolutely! I’m trying to get it right! This didn’t go
• that all those years of making nice were a sham right at all.”
• that his brothers thought him capable of “Why did you choose today to make amends to
harboring resentments your daughter?”
• that his brothers expected him to respond in “Well, it just felt right.”
vengeance (as opposed to forgiveness)
185
“Tell me more.” And after a lengthy conversation, Yesterday I told the story of a father who rushed
it turned out that this dad simply couldn’t stand the to his daughter and made amends too soon in his
thought that his daughter was disappointed in him recovery process. He was so aggressive in his
and angry with him, for one more minute. He just approach, so self‐focused in his delivery, and so
wanted things to be right between them. without an ounce of “other‐awareness,”—that she
I admire his sentiment; I really do. But this man ended up taking out a restraining order against him.
had been sober for about 30 days (he was on step For years, he continued on his road to recovery
three with his sponsor). To him, those thirty days without any contact with his daughter. During this
were amazingly significant, and that is an awesome process, his sponsor coached him about the value of
achievement. His kid, however, has another figure in an indirect amends. Humbled after several eager‐
her mind. Prior to these 30 days, she had spent thirty but‐false starts with the 12‐step model, this time the
years knowing him only as a father figure who drinks gentleman heeded the advice of his sponsor, made
too much, cares too little, and always seems to an indirect amends, and learned a lot about
embarrass her at big events and family functions. acceptance and patience in the process.
Even after all these years, this dad still thinks
Thought for today: For God did not give us a spirit of about his daughter and longs for a relationship with
timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self‐ her. Perhaps the greatest testimony to his healing
discipline. 2 Timothy 1:7 NIV and transformation is that in spite of his own
personal desires—more than his own wish for
Thought for tomorrow: Sometimes it takes more reconciliation—above all that: he doesn’t want to
power and strength to be still than it does to make a inflict further injury. And so he waits. He’s done his
move. This dad thought that God had given him a part, as best he can. Now he waits patiently to see
spirit of power, of love, and of self‐discipline, and what the future may hold.
chose to believe that this meant he could rush right
in and make amends. I wasn’t there; I don’t know Thought for today: “Therefore, encourage one
what he did or did not say that ultimately resulted in another and build each other up…” 1 Thessalonians
his daughter getting a restraining order against him. 5:11 NIV
I hope we can all learn from this well‐intentioned
father. Early in the recovery process, just because Thought for tomorrow: What a messy story! Don’t
something “feels right” doesn’t mean it is right! we all want happy endings? For those of us who
Judgment is a funny thing. Sometimes we so have experienced happy endings, rejoice!
desperately desire something to be true, that we Reconciliation is an awesome miracle. But let’s not
allow our desire to color our good judgment. As we discount the miracle of this messy story. This man
continue to ponder the complexities of step nine, it’s has maintained sobriety AND continued his recovery
my prayer that we’ll all utilize the gift of self‐ journey without getting his way in all matters! He’s
discipline—or as other translations say “a sound continued to allow God to have His way with him,
mind”—so that our desires won’t run ahead of our even when God’s ways haven’t resulted in the
abilities. Seek guidance; ask for feedback. Invite meeting of his personal desires! I call that
others to weigh in on the wisdom of that thing that miraculous! He made a mess of things with his kids,
just “feels right” to you. I’ve discovered that if and he doesn’t deny it. But neither has he allowed
something truly is “right” today, it will also be “right” that mess to define him. Part of the amends he
tomorrow. made indirectly to his daughter included going to
any lengths to learn how not to harm anyone at any
September 23 time ever again. That’s awesome. I appreciate how
he lets me tell his story if I think it might help
Scripture Reading for today: 2 Kings 16 and 17; someone. But he doesn’t go around marinating in
Ezekiel 16 self‐pity about this lost child. Instead, he uses his
continual longing for her to remind him of the value
of every relationship and the need to treat others
186
with respect. Have you allowed past messes to for, and try to win a marathon is because it is not in
define you or to refine you? I pray that you won’t get God’s plan for my life or because I am not willing to
side‐tracked from doing the next right thing simply submit to God’s plans for me.
because sometimes it doesn’t get you the thing you So I believe that through Christ I can do all things
desperately desire. that are in keeping with His will for me. But life is
messy, and sometimes hard work and a commitment
September 24 to excellence do NOT lead to success—at least not
success in the way we might define it.
Scripture Reading for today: 2 Kings 18 and 19;
Ezekiel 17 Thought for today: Please read Genesis 33:1‐11, the
story of Jacob’s amends to Esau.
I’m in the middle of reading a book by a fabulous
spiritual guru of our day. He’s telling us that we can Thought for tomorrow: The story of Jacob and Esau
achieve anything as long as we work hard and do is one of those messy accounts that makes me
everything with excellence. He quotes one of my scratch my head. Jacob, a tricky trickster, cheats his
favorite scriptures, “I can do all things through Christ brother and then has to flee for his life. Esau may be
who strengthens me.” slow witted when it comes to family intrigue, but
This is a conundrum: I think this guy is awesome, he’s a hunter who is perfectly capable of making
and I believe God’s word is truth. But I’m struggling mincemeat out of Jacob ‐ years pass. Jacob
with his interpretation and application of that continues to be a tricky trickster and finds himself
particular passage. I too believe that we can do all being tricked (good story if you haven’t read it) by
things through Christ as long as those things are in his father‐in‐law. He also has an intense personal
keeping with God’s will, and we’ve properly experience with God. Eventually Jacob must leave
prepared for battle. I’d love to run a marathon and his father‐in‐law’s land, mainly because of broken
win! But that’s not going to happen. Why? Well, it relationships and mutual manipulations. Then and
could be that God’s plans for me don’t include only then does he decide to try to make things right
training and winning a marathon. Perhaps my with his brother (is this self‐serving?). Note too that
reticence to change my schedule to accommodate his brother is eager to forgive him (even though
the training necessary to break records and gain Jacob hasn’t really made amends). As you read,
glory on the running field is my soul’s way of don’t miss the fact that Jacob sends his family into
agreeing with God in these matters. the potential line of fire from Esau, putting those he
It could be that God would love to see me break least values at the front of the line and those he
the tape at the finish line, but I’m not willing to loves the most toward the end of the line.
invest the time to prepare. Perhaps if I would Hmmmm…. that Jacob is always thinking. If you read
commit to the educational process, the training this account you think, Wow, what a great ending to
schedule, and the marathon process, God might do a long ‐ standing feud. But read on, because this is
something supernatural through me and grant me really an uneasy amends, and conflict remains
victory! This would mean He’d have to overcome my between these two branches of the family for
heart defect—and He’s God—so I believe he could generations. So as we proceed through step nine, I
miraculously intervene. God could decide to prove urge you to remember that the 12‐step process is
through me that age is no definer of one’s ability, not a simple, easy, magical way to resolve all life’s
and by some miraculous intervention I could take my messiness. It is a way to guide us in doing the next
middle‐aged body out to the course and defeat right thing. I love the idea of success. I’d love to win
those young, lean, mean fighting machine bodies a marathon and take home the grand prize. I believe
half my age. It could happen; if God so chose, and if I that I can do all things through Christ who
agreed to participate in His big dream for me. strengthens me. But scripture and my life experience
And unless and until God sends me a fax teach me that the way you and I define success and
confirming which of these two theories might be God’s way of defining success are sometimes
true, I simply don’t know if my failure to enter, train antithetical. We love the outward appearance of
187
things—the trappings of success. We like neat and 2 Samuel 9, David remembers his promise and
tidy answers and solutions that leave us feeling makes amends for his neglect. David was a
satisfied with ourselves. I read scripture and think complicated man. But in this story, he remembered.
that God’s got more going on—more complexity Once he remembered, he followed through. He did
being woven in the grand tapestry of his prevailing not wallow in self‐pity at his forgetfulness; he simply
purposes—than we can know. Sometimes it isn’t all took the next right step. I believe that sometimes we
about us. stumble on step nine because we prefer to wallow in
our own messiness rather than take the next right
September 25 step. I want to encourage you today to push through
and take that next step. If God brings to your mind a
Scripture Reading for today: 2 Kings 20 and 21; remembrance of a wrong in need of restitution,
Ezekiel 18 heed his still, quiet voice. Stepping as God speaks is
the epitome of successful living.
I used to be the kind of person who believed that
perfection was the golden rule. Strive, achieve, win: September 26
succeed. Until I grew up. As I’ve aged, I’ve not only
acquired more aches, pains, and wrinkles, but I’ve Scripture Reading for today: 2 Kings 22 and 23;
also gained a different perspective. Ezekiel 19
Today I’m a big fan of acknowledging the
messiness of life—sometimes in spite of our One of my girlfriends told me the most interesting
attempts to strive, achieve, win, succeed—and story this week. I’ll mess it up if I try to repeat it, but
sometimes because of these desires. As a child, I this is the condensed version: she found a way to
heard the stories of David (you remember him: a weave and bob around God’s principles of
young shepherd boy who killed giant Goliath with a forgiveness until God convicted her of the error of
slingshot and ultimately became a king) and thought her ways—while she was vacuuming. (That’s what
he was the epitome of striving, achieving, winning, she gets for getting out a vacuum cleaner!)
and succeeding. Then I heard the rest of the story. I am privileged to have a lot of deeply devoted
(David had a very messy life including depression, followers of Christ as friends, but this particular
adultery, and conspiracy to commit murder, while friend takes the cake. She is one of my spiritual
still being “a man after God’s own heart”). Life was a heroes. Her story reminded me that if a desperately
lot easier when I thought you could distinguish the devoted follower of Christ could find a way to get
good guys from the bad by the color of their cowboy turned around and confused in the midst of an
hats. offensive relationship, we are all vulnerable!
Depending on what part of David’s life I choose to
examine, David is either a hero or a goat. In truth, Thoughts for today: Son of man, give the people of
he’s both—capable of great devotion to God AND Israel this message: You are saying, “Our sins are
living independently of God. Just like us! heavy upon us; we are wasting away! How can we
survive?” As surely as I live, says the Sovereign Lord, I
Thought for today: “One day David asked, ‘Is anyone take no pleasure in the death of wicked people. I only
in Saul’s family still alive—anyone to whom I can want them to turn from their wicked ways so they
show kindness for Jonathan’s sake?’ ” 2 Samuel 9:1 can live. Ezekiel 33:10‐11 NLT
NLT Son of man, give your people this message: The
righteous behavior of righteous people will not save
Thought for tomorrow: Jonathan was Saul’s (the them if they turn to sin, nor will the wicked behavior
king before David who lost God’s blessing because of of wicked people destroy them if they repent and
his crazy ways) son and David’s best friend. David turn from their sins. When I tell righteous people that
had made a promise to Jonathan, and then he forgot they will live, but then they sin, expecting their past
to fulfill it. Mephibosheth, Jonathan’s only living son, righteousness to save them, then none of their
was the unwitting victim of David’s forgetfulness. In
188
righteous acts will be remembered. Ezekiel 33:12‐13 that we can without going codependent or violating
NLT healthy boundaries—can make us sick.

Thought for tomorrow: Ezekiel reminds us of two Thought for today: Then Jesus said, “Come to me, all
potential vulnerabilities: 1. Thinking our bad is bigger of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I
than God’s grace, and 2. Believing that a good deed will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me
of the past can cancel out a misdeed in the present. teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart,
Larger than either of those points is this: God desires and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is
to extend grace and mercy and forgiveness to us easy to bear, and the burden I give you is light.”
when we repent. End of story—almost. Repentance Matthew 11: 28‐30 NLT
isn’t the same thing as saying we’re sorry or feelings
of remorse. Repentance literally means: turning Thought for tomorrow: A few weeks ago my
around, standing at a crossroad, and choosing to daughter and I spent the weekend in New York
take a different path. Repentance is both apology— playing. On my plane ride home I had the privilege of
acknowledgement of wrong and restitution—taking getting to know a rheumatologist. Recognizing a
a new path. I pray today you will attack any captive audience (and a very kind person) when I
vulnerable areas in your thinking that are holding saw one, I plied her with questions. I asked her what
you back from repenting. she thought about the spirit/body connection and
the effects our spiritual condition has on the body.
September 27 Here’s a quote that I’m trying not to butcher, “…One
of the most frustrating things for me as a physician
Scripture Reading for today: 2 Kings 24 and 25; who works with chronically ill patients is those who
Ezekiel 20 refuse to acknowledge that there’s more going on
with them than the illness I’m treating.” Chronic
In yesterday’s devotional, I mentioned a friend pain, depression, sleeplessness, compulsions,
who had a God moment while vacuuming. God anxiety, bursts of anger at inappropriate times,
reminded her of the high value He places on loneliness, isolation, and a host of other issues that
restored relationships. The truth of God’s cause us discomfort can be linked to states of dis‐
perspective and the clarity of His voice struck her ease that have far more to do with our spiritual
with such force that she was compelled to respond condition than our actual physical or mental state.
in obedience. (Of course, that’s why she’s one of my God created you to live at rest. He wants to teach
heroes!) you how to live with a peaceful soul. Part of that
Not all of us are ready to relinquish our weaving lesson involves learning how to resolve conflict. My
and bobbing. You know what I’m talking about! We prayer for you today is that if God chooses to bring
have these mental ping pong matches; we try to to your mind a broken relationship in need of
rationalize and justify why God’s principles for living attention, you will listen and respond. Your health
apply to others but not ourselves. may depend on it.
While all this mental jousting is taking place, our
bodies, minds, and spirits are in a state of dis‐ease. If September 28
we continue these silent gymnastics long enough,
we will actually begin to experience disease(s). Scripture Reading for today: Matthew 1 and 2;
When God designed the human body, His intent was Ezekiel 21
for us to live at peace. Can you believe that? Our
bodies run most efficiently if we are living in right Everyone has heard the phrase, “It is more blessed
relationship with God, self, and others. We weren’t to give than to receive.” And what about the ever‐
created to run on the heavy fuel of unforgiveness, popular, “God loves a cheerful giver.” Who can
bitterness, resentment, guilt, or shame. Whether the forget their childhood memories of parental
offender or the offended, a failure to heed God’s instruction? “I said: share that with your brother!” I
warning to live at peace with others—to the extent love the current commercial that shows two young
189
brothers at snack time with only one slice of bread. Christ loved him, accepted him for the greedy little
Slathered with peanut butter (yum), both boys are man that he was, and gave him the strength to rise
concerned about who might get the “bigger” half. So above his natural inclinations. I can hear the soft
TV‐mom comes up with the perfect solution, one voice of Jesus calling to us, but not in condemnation
cuts the bread and the other brother chooses the or even correction. I hear His invitation, “Come to
first slice! Suffering from an obsession with all things me, all of you who are weary (with your life of trying
peanut butter, I pay close attention when the to make up for all that you lack) and carry heavy
choosing brother chooses his piece, and I am sure he burdens (of all the things you’ve acquired at the
gets a slightly larger portion! expense of others), and I will give you rest. Matthew
In spite of biblical entreaties and parental 11:28 NLT
instructions, most of us have a natural inclination
that prefers receiving to giving! And although God September 29
loves a cheerful giver, an honest person must admit
that most of us are at our most cheerful when we’re Scripture Reading for today: Philemon; Ezekiel 22
receiving something we really, really adore!
Until we have a supernatural encounter. In scripture, the Apostle Paul was a guy who didn’t
In Luke 19, there’s a guy named Zacchaeus who mind ruffling feathers. Before his conversion
has acquired great wealth by colluding with his experience, he was a zealous Jew who persecuted
enemies (the Romans) and cheating his fellow Christians because he sincerely believed that it was
citizens by dishonestly collecting taxes. Zacchaeus the right thing to do. Post‐conversion he was just as
would have been hated by his community for this act passionate in his preaching of the gospel. He was the
of treason. I wonder if receiving all that loot eased kind of guy that you could imagine would not let the
his pain. laws of man stand in his way when he believed that
Evidently it did not. Because when Jesus entered those laws were in contradiction to God’s intentions.
Jericho, Zacchaeus went to great lengths just to get a So it comes as quite a surprise in the tiny New
look at him. Jesus responded by inviting himself to Testament book of Philemon that Paul, who has
dinner at the home of Zacchaeus. Scripture reports befriended and led to Christ a young slave runaway
that Zacchaeus was filled with excitement and great by the name of Onesimus, sends Onesimus back to
joy. Then he did an amazing thing. He made an his owner. Sending Onesimus back means that, by
amends—one that included generous restitution for law, this runaway can be put to death for his crime.
all that he had taken. A quick read of Paul’s letter to the “owners” of
Onesimus clearly communicates Paul’s intentions:
Thought for today: Jesus responded, “Salvation has accept Onesimus back, and allow me (Paul) to make
come to this home today, for this man has shown restitution for any debt Onesimus owes. One
himself to be a true son of Abraham. For the Son of assumes that these friends of Paul, also believers,
Man came to seek and save those who are lost.” will hear and respond to the amends of Onesimus.
Luke 19:9‐10 NLT It’s not clear from this letter the outcome of this
amends.
Thought for tomorrow: I know that every inclination Amends‐making is risky business. The outcome is
of your heart is a desire to receive. Frankly, I believe uncertain. From our perspective, Onesimus
that many of our efforts to give are tainted with an shouldn’t have been a slave at all. It would be easy
expectation of receiving something in return. I know for us to support Paul’s decision NOT to return
this because scripture teaches this, and I’ve Onesimus, and instead offer him refuge. But Paul
experienced the sting of its truth personally. Don’t held to the letter of the law of the land at that time.
let that discourage you. Instead, run hard, climb a I can only imagine how difficult it was for this
tree, go to any lengths to get a peek at Jesus. fighter of the good fight to humble himself before
Zacchaeus didn’t decide to make amends and then Philemon and to take a risk that could cost a man his
have Jesus choose to be his friend. First, Zacchaeus life. Sometimes doing the next right thing requires
sought the face of Christ, and Christ turned to him. courage.
190
suffering and rush to the springs of living waters! But
Thought for today: “These are the ones I look on it doesn’t work that way. This journey we’ve
with favor: those who are humble and contrite in undertaken promises freedom, but it is costly. It’s
spirit, and who tremble at my word.” Isaiah 66:2b easy to say that Jesus paid it all, because it’s true.
Today’s NIV Without His sacrifice, we wouldn’t have a prayer of
achieving God’s big dreams for us. But it’s foolish
Thought for tomorrow: Sometimes it’s easy to get and simplistic to assume that His sacrifice means
on our high horses and feel as if we can circumvent that we are merely receivers—never expected to
the rules of man for a “higher call.” Paul could have give in return. I know we love the good stuff: the
made this argument here. He chose otherwise. We promise of rest, the light burdens, the freedom. But
must make past mistakes right—so long as to do so let’s not forget that part of the really great stuff is
does not injure the offended or others. If you’re the equipping. God provides for us all that we need
wrestling with the question of what to do in the risky not only to rest, carry light burdens, and enjoy the
business of amends, please pause to prepare. Seek fruits of freedom. He also gives us the ability to
wise counsel. But don’t just assume that because share in the carrying of heavy loads, the courage to
there is some risk involved that you’re off the hook. suffer without experiencing defeat, the strength to
withstand temptation, and the wherewithal to do
September 30 the next right thing. The allure of a pampered prince
or princess life is strong, but the promise of an
Scripture Reading for today: Ezekiel 23; Matthew 3 adventurous life of a prince or princess warrior is
and 4 AWESOME! May God grant you all that you need to
make step nine a reality, so that you may be
My husband used to say that Philippians was his unencumbered as we run the race toward the goal:
favorite book of the Bible—until he studied it! becoming more and more a reflection of our God‐
Sometimes I think we romance the idea of making created identity.
amends, hoping for a great outcome—until we truly
understand the process. STEP 10 We continued to take personal inventory,
I want to close this devotional series on step nine and when we were wrong, promptly admitted it.
with one final word of warning: Do this, expecting
nothing in return. October 1

Thought for today: For God is pleased with you when Scripture Reading for today: Ezekiel 24 and 25;
you do what you know is right and patiently endure Matthew 5
unfair treatment. Of course, you get no credit for
being patient if you are beaten for doing wrong. But When my children were small, my mom loved to
if you suffer for doing good and endure it patiently, tell them I was a “bookworm.” Bookworm was a new
God is pleased with you. For God called you to do word; it did not make sense to their literal, little
good, even if it means suffering, just as Christ minds. I forget which child changed it, but in an
suffered for you. He is your example, and you must effort to make sense of a word that seemed
follow in his steps. 1 Peter 2:19‐21 NLT nonsensical, they created a new and improved word.
Anytime one of them would find me reading, they’d
Thought for tomorrow: The call to desperately say, “Mom is a bookword!” My children were
devoted following of Christ is a conundrum. He completely unwilling to be guided in this area. They
promises us rest for our soul while fully simply liked their word better. Step ten is all about
acknowledging that this might require suffering in guidance. One simply can’t take an accurate
the body. People in recovery understand what Jesus personal inventory without guidance, particularly in
is teaching. Sometimes in order to find peace, one the area of admitting wrongdoing.
must be willing to walk through the valley of the
shadow of suffering. Oh, how we long to skip the
191
Thought for today: The Lord is my shepherd, I shall October 2
not be in want. He makes me lie down in green
pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters, he Scripture Reading for today: Ezekiel 26; Matthew 6
restores my soul. He guides me in paths of and 7
righteousness for his name’s sake. Even though I
walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will In a very old book titled A Shepherd Looks at Psalm
fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your 23, Phillip Keller draws from his experiences growing
staff, they comfort me. You prepare a table before up in East Africa, “surrounded by simple native
me in the presence of my enemies. You anoint my herders whose customs closely resembled those of
head with oil; my cup overflows. Surely goodness and their counterparts in the Middle East.” He reports
love will follow me all the days of my life, and I will that he was also a sheep owner and rancher as a
dwell in the house of the Lord forever. Psalm 23 NIV young man. Using his experiences as a foundation,
God, my shepherd! I don’t need a thing. You have Keller wrote a simple and direct work in the twenty
bedded me down in lush meadows, you find me quiet third Psalm.
pools to drink from. True to your word, you let me One of the many new facts about sheep that I
catch my breath and send me in the right direction. learned from this modern day shepherd is that
Even when the way goes through Death Valley, I’m sheep are famous for being creatures of habit. In
not afraid when you walk at my side. Your trusty fact, this is such a problem for sheep that if left un‐
shepherd’s crook makes me feel secure. You serve shepherded, they will stay on the same paths until
me a six‐course dinner right in front of my enemies. they turn the paths into ruts—this will lead to
You revive my drooping head; my cup brims with erosion that can destroy the entire farm. They’ll
blessings. Your beauty and love chase after me every eat the grass until they damage the root systems.
day of my life. I’m back home in the house of God for This causes more erosion problems and large
the rest of my life. Psalm 23, The Message patches of barren land. Their unwillingness to
move from one area to the next results in polluting
Thought for tomorrow: Sometimes I’m like my the pasture with their waste—ultimately causing
children were with this word confusion. I have areas them to be diseased and parasitic. If sheep are not
in my life where I am completely unwilling to be properly managed, their grasslands will become
guided. Certain beliefs, thoughts, feelings, opinions, wastelands, they will become diseased, and any
decisions, and choices simply make so much sense to hope for the shepherd to make a living will be lost.
me that I block out any information that would Utter desolation is the only outcome for sheep
confuse my certainty. Can you relate? Spend some without a shepherd. A wise shepherd takes all
time today asking yourself what you’re certain these factors into consideration. Simply by keeping
about, and see what makes the list. (Hint: It may the sheep on the move—a shepherd can keep his
help to think about conversations you’ve had with land healthy, his sheep well, and end up with a
people you love who’ve tried to present a different very productive sheep farm that will stay that way
perspective.) Then spend a few moments for many years. In short, a shepherd needs a good
meditating on this question: Lord, is there any area plan and must be willing to execute it.
in my life that I’m so certain in the way I’m living that The truth about sheep is this: they are certain at
I have become unwilling to be guided by you? any given moment that they are in the perfect
Making up a new word is fun, creative, and pretty pasture for them; it’s their destiny! They are
harmless. But when we are desperately devoted content. They see no reason to move on. The
followers of Christ, we’re on a grand adventure. shepherd knows better and plans accordingly.
We’re being led by the good shepherd who meets all Fortunately, sheep usually choose to follow. We
our needs according to his riches in glory, who have the ultimate shepherd who happens to have a
provides spiritual nourishment through rest and pretty amazing plan for our lives. Is our sheep‐like
proper feeding, and who restores our very souls! Can certainty of our own destiny standing in the way of a
we afford to be so certain? really terrific God moment?

192
Thought for today: True to your word, you let me things, but (2) not being so complacent that I end
catch my breath and send me in the right direction. up in a wasteland plagued by parasites and
Psalm 23:3 The Message diseases? When I find two thoughts that seem to be
oppositional in God’s word, my experience has
Thought for tomorrow: If you’ve been following taught me that this usually means there is something
along and practicing the principles found in the I am missing in my understanding. One of the most
twelve‐step model, you’ve been working it! You’ve effective tools that God has used to guide me during
come to accept that there is a higher power, and you times of confusion is His word.
didn’t get the job! You’ve asked God to have His way …There’s nothing like the written Word of God for
with you. You’ve already taken one thorough moral showing you the way to salvation through faith in
inventory and used subsequent steps to make peace Christ Jesus. Every part of Scripture is God‐breathed
with your discoveries—allowing God to guide you and useful one way or another – showing us truth,
along the way. Now is not the time to rest on your exposing our rebellion, correcting our mistakes,
laurels (whatever that means). We’re moving into training us to live God’s way. Through the Word we
the true fruit‐bearing steps; we’re getting to the are put together and shaped up for the tasks God
good stuff! Let’s use this month to prepare to be has for us. 2 Timothy 3: 15‐17 The Message
wowed by God. There’s a reason that I’ve often heard scholars of
scripture referred to as “students” of God’s word.
October 3 Knowing scripture, understanding scripture, and
applying it are lifelong ambitions and are not for the
Scripture Reading for today: Ezekiel 27; Matthew 8 faint of heart. God’s word is living, breathing, alive,
and 9 and sometimes tricky to apply. In this instance, I
think the fog of my confusion clears when I
When the writers of the twelve steps allowed for understand another neat fact about the nature of
two steps dealing with inventory, those folks really sheep.
knew what they were doing. My experience with Wise shepherds keep their sheep on the move,
step ten was quite different from my first trip and we know why. But what we haven’t discussed is
through step four. This time, I was prepared to go a how the sheep respond to this constant guidance. As
little deeper; having dealt with a lot of the “big” stuff the sheep move from one pasture to the next, they
in step four, step ten required a little more muscle to get excited! Even the older sheep will kick up their
ferret out my wrongs. I came to realize that heels and leap for joy at the prospect of a fresh
sometimes a “wrong” was truly the absence of a green pasture. These sheep, so prone to complacent
bigger “right.” One issue that my spiritual mentor contentment, have their wild side too. They are
asked me to consider was my lack of contentment— passionate when forced to face a new pasture. True,
in any and all circumstances. This principle is found it requires guiding, but once led, these sheep know
in scripture, “I am not saying this because I am in how to boogie!
need, for I have learned to be content whatever the
circumstances.” (Philippians 4:11 NIV) This verse Thought for today: True to your word, you let me
confirmed for me the soundness of my guide’s catch my breath and send me in the right direction.
counsel. It made me think of Psalm 23:1—coming to Psalm 23:3 The Message
know that I shall not be in want. When I think of
contentment, I think of fuzzy slippers, a warm cozy Thought for tomorrow: As I wrestle with these two
fire, and a good book. I think of peace, calm, and confusing (to me) concepts, a glimmer of light leads
definitely no drama. me toward a new thought. If I am like a sheep, then
But as I thought back to the contented sheep, I maybe contentment is a good thing. But it should
found myself confused. Their contentment (as we never be a goal‐thing. My mentor didn’t necessarily
learned in yesterday’s devotional), left unabated, mean that I should strive for contentment (as
will get them in big trouble. So how do I reconcile defined by me) as the ultimate goal for one who
these two thoughts: (1) learning contentment in all finds their way back to God. Contentment, true
193
contentment, is a by‐product of a willing heart that preconceived (and needlessly certain) idea of what it
eagerly seeks to be guided by the good shepherd. would take for me to be content right alongside my
Ah…my heart sings. In my limited (and often desire to follow God wherever He leads. Those two
ridiculously certain) perspective, can contentment passions sometimes co‐exist uneasily. But there’s
and unrequited passion co‐exist? Absolutely. Ask the another reason for restlessness that is downright
sheep. Now, go and ask God to lead you to those exciting; sometimes I am restless right before God
new, green pastures that you’d never visit on your swings open the gate of opportunity.
own. When He takes you, they’ll cause you to boogie
for joy! Thought for today: True to your word, you let me
catch my breath and send me in the right direction.
October 4 Psalm 23:3 The Message

Scripture Reading for today: Ezekiel 28; Matthew 10 Thought for tomorrow: Where are you in your faith
and 11 journey? Perhaps you’re in a better spot than you
imagined! As you pray today, ask God to lead you
Several devotionals ago, I told you how when my and guide you, so that you will not be driven by
children were little they called me a “bookword” fantasies of contentment in the form of mere things,
because “bookworm” made no sense to them. Well, unrealistic expectations, and feelings. As you’re
I am still a “bookword” and that may be why I see processing your inventory, don’t be too quick to
nothing strange or boring with continuing through judge yourself harshly. Pause to prepare. Be willing
this devotional series to harp on Psalm 23. I love to allow for the Holy Spirit’s moving as He calls you
how the words flow in this psalm. The writer guides to greener pastures. Sometimes our restlessness is
us on a journey of blessing upon blessing by building not discontentment; it’s longing. Be warned,
an image, word upon word. It will be hard to fully however, that if we rush ahead—defining and
appreciate the phrase that I’m obsessing over this pursuing longing independently of God‐‐we’re
week without having David’s carefully crafted image headed for a briar patch. If we’re stepping as God
firmly planted in our minds. speaks, it’s possible He’s using this restlessness to
First, David reminds us that God is the ultimate get our attention. And that’s always a good thing.
provider of all our needs. As I mature, I am learning
how to anticipate, expect, and look out for God’s October 5
blessings in my daily life experiences. I haven’t
matured past the point of having personal desires Scripture Reading for today: Ezekiel 29 and 30;
and expectations for what I hope that will look like, Matthew 12
but I am in the process of coming to believe that
truly, with the Lord as my shepherd, I shall not be in Knowing that God is in the business of meeting our
want. needs (The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not be in
I used to think that contentment came from want), we arrive at the next blessing found in Psalm
getting everything I need and some of what I want. 23: spiritual nourishment (He makes me lie down in
I’m practicing the fine art of believing when I realize green pastures, He leads me beside quiet waters).
that true contentment comes from the wellspring of This is a concept that we might not have been ready
belief that I shall not be in want. When I can to appreciate when we began the twelve‐step
recognize the blessings of God in my life—even process. Wounded and sore, most of us preferred to
when they’re quirky and come packaged NOT to my hope for simple survival. Hopefully, as time has
specifications—I can begin to get a clue about passed and we’ve experienced the great mercies of
David’s message to us in this psalm. God, we can now allow ourselves to dream of not
Within my spirit there is sometimes a only surviving, but thriving. (If you’re not at this
restlessness—an unease. Sometimes it is because place in your spiritual journey yet, don’t fear; if you
I’m not allowing myself to be guided by the Lord. keep stepping, one day you’ll wake up ready to
Sometimes it is confusion; I live with my believe bigger than you can imagine!) Once we
194
understand that everything worth having flows from There’s a progression in Psalm 23 that’s important
the Father to us, we can see His priority of blessing. to notice: choose to accept the shepherding of the
First on the list of all the great things God wants to Lord, allow spiritual nourishment to happen, and
provide for us is spiritual nourishment. In many ways expect a fertile environment for soul restoration.
I am still very much like the ten year old who spent Next, be guided in the right direction.
her summers tucked under big trees reading books; I All we like sheep have gone astray; we have turned
am still a dreamer. But unlike that dream‐child, I every one to his own way. Isaiah 53:6
now know that none of my dreams are worth What is the natural way of sheep? They can’t
pursuing if I am not spiritually nourished each step survive without a shepherd; as extroverts, they need
of the way. Without an intimate connection with community. On their own, they get too complacent
God, my dreams may be nothing more than and put themselves in harm’s way. Without a good
fantasies—doomed to disappoint. Even God’s leader, they are defenseless against their enemies.
dreams for me are vulnerable to my self‐sabotaging They need a shepherd to find nourishment for them.
if I’ve failed to allow him to nourish me as I live his Finally, the thing about sheep that I just love: they
grand epic adventure on a daily basis. joyfully and passionately approach new green
David adds another layer of blessing when he pastures, but someone must lead them.
speaks of soul restoration (He restores my soul). A Is there any question that we have a few
wounded soul will always be hampered in its ability characteristics in common with sheep? In the
to thrive, even when it’s being spiritually nourished. I recovery community we have a word to describe
have a friend who has digestive problems; her body shepherd‐less living: insanity. Those familiar with
isn’t able to absorb nutrients like it needs to. She is a recovery lingo will also recognize the commonly held
health nut when it comes to eating, but she still definition of insanity: doing the same thing over and
battles malnutrition. Without soul restoration, we over expecting different results. Doesn’t that sound
too struggle with our spiritual health. This is true for familiar?
those of us who are faithful church participants and
for those who are not. If we have not allowed God to Thought for today: True to your word, you let me
restore our very souls, our spiritual vitality suffers. catch my breath and send me in the right direction.
Finally, David comes to the subject of our Psalm 23:3 The Message
devotionals for this week: guidance. Once we know
that God meets our needs, we begin to receive Thought for tomorrow: As you pray today, ask God
spiritual nourishment, and we allow Him to restore to reveal to you one area of personal insanity. Then,
our souls, we’re ready for our next grand adventure: prayerfully commit it to the leading of the Lord. If
a guided life journey with God Himself! you find wrongdoing, certainly by now you know
what to do next. If not, go to
Thought for today: True to your word, you let me www.northstarcommunity.com and find some aids
catch my breath and send me in the right direction. to help you in this awesome refining process.
Psalm 23:3 The Message
October 7
Thought for tomorrow: Tomorrow we’re going to
talk about why we so desperately need this Scripture Reading for today: Ezekiel 33 and 34;
particular blessing from God. Today, ask God to Matthew 14
make you keenly aware of His guiding hand in your
life today. We do not deal much in facts when we are
contemplating ourselves. (Mark Twain)
October 6 Sheep don’t wake up every morning and set out to
mess up their pasture. They don’t try to leave the
Scripture Reading for today: Ezekiel 31 and 32; safety of their pack and get attacked by their
Matthew 13 enemies. Sheep don’t stay up at night plotting how
to make the life of their shepherd more vexing, and
195
neither do we. Most choices we make are made with tried to weasel out of it. Frankly, I was hoping I could
the intention, the desire, the hope, and the prayer be the one exception: the unique person who could
that we’ve made the best decision possible and it just forget about my past and move on. But my
will benefit us in some way. It’s time for us to spiritual advocate was way too wise to fall for that
acknowledge our utter incompetence at self‐care. delay tactic!
God is far more effective at guiding us to green By the time I rounded the curve and ran into step
pastures than we are at arriving there without His ten, I was in a different place spiritually and
leadership. But that’s not to say that we sit around emotionally. A lot of the junk had been cleaned out
and twiddle our thumbs waiting for God to dump of my trunk. But my spiritual eyes had grown sharper
blessing upon blessing into our laps! during this process, and I noticed more “subtleties”
I once knew a young lady who believed quite of wrong. I also approached step ten with a spring in
sincerely that God led her in every aspect of her my step. I had learned the benefits of entering into
life—including wardrobe selection—and she had a the process, leaning into the pain. I knew that
great wardrobe. Her belief was that when you went resolving past hurts, habits, and hang‐ups actually
shopping, you should pray for God to lead you to the felt good—eventually.
exact outfit He wanted you to purchase. Amazingly For me, step ten is like a Monday morning. I have a
enough, He always led her to the finest in fashion! I love/hate relationship with Mondays. After a
personally do not think this is what the psalmist had weekend of fun, sometimes it’s hard to slip back into
in mind when he wrote that God would “send me in the saddle of a work day, school schedule, and
the right direction.” There are just some issues that routine. Once in the saddle, it feels kind of good. The
God expects us to manage, under the authority of structure helps order my family’s day. It increases
His principles for right relating. Later this young productivity. We actually enjoy the pleasure of our
woman came to understand that she was using God routine. Step ten is like that for me. It gets me back
as a shield of protection. If she could believe that He to the basics of paying attention to how I’m
directed her to pricey attire, she didn’t have to navigating my responsibilities and relationships. It
examine her ways. If her budget was a little out of helps me nip potential bad habits in the bud. I love
whack, that was God’s problem! step ten!

Thought for today: True to your word, you let me Thought for today: When I was a child, I spoke and
catch my breath and send me in the right direction. thought and reasoned as a child. But when I grew up,
Psalm 23:3 The Message I put away childish things. Now we see things
imperfectly as in a cloudy mirror, but then we will see
Thought for tomorrow: I pray God will guide each of everything with perfect clarity. All that I know now is
us in the way we should go, and we will follow it partial and incomplete, but then I will know
without self‐deception, denial, or delusion. And everything completely, just as God now knows me
when we’ve lost our way a bit and gotten a little off completely. 1 Corinthians 13:11‐12 NLT
track, I pray that we will recognize His gentle
nudging intended to help us find our way back Thought for tomorrow: I’ll bet you’ve learned more
home. about Psalm 23 than you may think necessary! Take
a few moments (don’t peek!) and write out all that
October 8 you can remember about the twenty‐third Psalm.
How much could you write down? How tough was
Scripture Reading for today: Ezekiel 33; Matthew 15 it? Notice in the days ahead how God uses your
and 16 knowledge of the twenty‐third Psalm to guide and
instruct you, and let me know what you notice! A
The first time I was mentored through the Christ‐ spiritual mentor of mine once told me that God’s
centered twelve steps, my inventory (see step four) word stored in my heart gives God direct access to
was an emotion fest. It was long. It was messy. It my mind. It enables Him to speak to me more
freaked me out. I dreaded step four so much that I clearly. I’m curious to see if your experience is like
196
mine: the more exposure I have to His word, the When my children were small, they were given
more I experience hearing His voice. their inoculations against certain diseases; this was
preventative medicine. My kids didn’t appreciate
October 9 those shots. And currently there’s a certain amount
of controversy surrounding them; some are asking,
Scripture Reading for today: Matthew 17 – 19 are they safe for our children? I have no clue, but I
do know that none of my children contracted polio,
Steps four through nine provide us with a way to measles, mumps, rubella or any of the other nasty
clean up the messes of our past. But messes still diseases that felled so many children prior to these
happen. Mercifully, step ten provides us with a way shots becoming available.
to deal with them as they occur. This is a huge Step ten is preventative medicine. It has the
blessing. Listen to what the Alcoholics Anonymous potential to keep us from falling back into the
Big Book says about step ten: insanity, unmanageability, and dependencies that
This thought brings us to Step Ten, which suggests controlled us prior to working the twelve steps. It
we continue to take personal inventory and continue stings a bit, and sometimes I don’t appreciate the
to set right any new mistakes as we go along. We necessity of this step. Some even argue that it is a bit
vigorously commenced this way of living as we self‐absorbed (I respectfully disagree.). But my
cleaned up the past. We have entered the world of experience is that when people practice the
the Spirit. Our next function is to grow in principles that this step espouses, they avoid the
understanding and effectiveness. This is not an outbreak of a really bad disease (relapse).
overnight matter. It should continue for our lifetime.
Continue to watch for selfishness, dishonesty, Thought for today: So, if you think you are standing
resentment, and fear. When these crop up we ask firm, be careful that you don’t fall. 1 Corinthians
God at once to remove them. We discuss them with 10:12 NIV
someone immediately and make amends quickly if Let a man examine himself. 1 Corinthians 11:28
we have harmed anyone. Then we resolutely turn our NKJV
thoughts to someone we can help. Love and
tolerance of others is our code. 27 Thought for tomorrow: Recovery is a lifestyle, not
Step ten provides us the opportunity to practice an emergency relief plan.
newly discovered skill sets. This is crucial if we want
to live the abundant life that Christ has promised us. October 11

Thought for today: If any of you lacks wisdom, he Scripture Reading for today: Ezekiel 35; Matthew 22
should ask God, who gives generously to all without and 23
finding fault, and it will be given to him. James 1:5
NIV My husband has one teeny tiny flaw that I’m sure
he won’t mind if I share with you! He’s not that great
Thought for tomorrow: This step provides us a at putting tools away. This became glaringly
wake‐up call; let’s heed it. apparent one spring day when our kids were young.
He repaired one of their bikes and stuck the
October 10 screwdriver he used in a nearby flower pot. He
promptly forgot that it was there; I think that
Scripture Reading for today: Ezekiel 34; Matthew 20 screwdriver stayed in the planter for months.
and 21 One day our youngest child overheard me asking
my husband where I could find this particular tool.
Michael piped up, “Mommy, they’re growing out
back in their special pot!”
Yes, our son believed that screwdrivers grew in
27 pots.
Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 84.
197
Like Pete, we can sometimes get a bit careless with weigh themselves regularly. They keep food journals.
our recovery tools. We forget them, toss them aside, They not only change how they eat, they increase
and very subtly return to our old tried‐and‐true ways their activity level too.
of dealing with life. This kind of self‐monitoring and accountability
We’ve solved our tool crisis by changing our breeds success, and it sounds a lot like an effective
“asking” when we need something. Now we ask, step ten. Step ten is daily monitoring. It’s paying
“Hey, what was the last project you were working on attention to how we’re feeling. It requires pausing to
and did your use ________ (we insert in the blank prepare. It reminds us to use the skills we gained in
whatever tool we currently need)?” This is a fine steps one through nine. Our experience allows us to
strategy for finding lost tools. After all, what’s the move purposefully through them without the agony
worst that can happen? If we can’t find a hammer, of acquiring a new skill set; heck, we already know
saw or socket set, we have choices. We can go how to do this!
purchase new ones or we can call a repair man who I personally appreciate pausing to prepare every
keeps up with his tools. No big deal! morning and evening. Sometimes I journal. Often I’ll
However, when we grow careless with our have an assignment or two I need to complete the
recovery tools, we may be in jeopardy of losing the next day to get myself back on track. I’ve even found
opportunity to live the grand epic adventure God has that twice‐yearly retreats are essential for me to
planned for us. make sure I’m “continuing” to take my inventory,
and I promptly respond to what I find.
Thought for today: Anyone who listens to the word Does this sound too self‐focused? I hope not. I
but does not do what it says is like a man who looks believe this process helps negate my natural
at his face in a mirror and, after looking at himself, inclinations to grow forgetful. I also believe it is a
goes away and immediately forgets what he looks biblical principle that God instructs me to heed.
like. James 1:23 NIV
Thought for today: As we know Jesus better, his
Thought for tomorrow: Surely we’ve all learned at divine power gives us everything we need for living a
this point in our journey that we are predisposed to godly life. He has called us to receive his own glory
grow forgetful. We forget about God. We forget and goodness! And by that same mighty power, he
about our natural inclinations – and the severe has given us all of his rich and wonderful promises.
consequences that follow our forgetful ways. We He has promised that you will escape the decadence
forget that once we were lost, but now we are all around you caused by evil desires and that you
found. We forget that our “foundness” brings both will share in his divine nature. So make every effort
blessing and responsibility. We forget. Thankfully, to apply the benefits of these promises to your life.
step ten can remind us to carry on a more Then your faith will produce a life of moral
intentional way of living. excellence. 2 Peter 3, selected passages

October 12 Thought for tomorrow: Sometimes I find myself in
the middle of step ten quite unintentionally. As I
Scripture Reading for today: Ezekiel 36; Matthew 24 read through 2 Peter 3, I begin to ask myself
and 25 questions. Am I receiving the glory and goodness
promised me? If not, why not? Am I appreciating
People who keep track of these things tell us that and accepting all those promises? Do I even know
most people who go on diets eventually gain their what they are? Have I escaped the decadence all
weight back. Experts report that this is because around me, or have I unwittingly fallen into a pit?
people treat a diet like it is a temporary way of Am I sharing in his divine nature, truthfully? Would
eating as opposed to a lifestyle change. my family agree with my self‐assessment? Am I
According to these gurus, successful “losers” making the right kinds of efforts in my daily living
choose to adopt new lifestyles—not new fad diets. AND experiencing the benefits? Am I living a life of
They make a change in how they eat every day. They
198
moral excellence? I have found that as I spend time patient endurance leads to godliness. Godliness leads
in God’s word, step ten happens. to love for other Christians, and finally you will grow
to have genuine love for everyone. The more you
October 13 grow like this, the more you will become productive
and useful in your knowledge of our Lord Jesus
Scripture Reading for today: Matthew 26 – 28 Christ. But those who fail to develop these virtues are
blind or, at least, very shortsighted. They have
According to today’s scripture, leading a life of already forgotten that God has cleansed them from
moral excellence results in our knowing God better. their old life of sin. So, dear brothers and sisters,
How in the world do we lead a life of moral work hard to prove that you really are among those
excellence? God has called and chosen. Doing this, you will never
Gosh! I don’t know all that an excellent moral life stumble or fall away. And God will open wide the
entails, but I’m learning. For years it seemed to me gates of heaven for you to enter into the eternal
that I began by learning what it doesn’t involve. I had Kingdom of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. 2
some bad habits that needed breaking. I had some Peter1, selected passages
harming ways that I had to stop. Some days it
seemed like I was pausing to prepare every step of Thought for tomorrow: After many, many years of
the way; I knew I couldn’t trust myself to take a confusion, today I can honestly say that some bad
single step without falling into a spiritual ditch. habits of my past are non‐issues; but I don’t
I got really freaked out when I realized that presume to believe that they’ll stay that way if I get
sometimes what I thought was right was really careless about whom I choose to serve. I’m still in
wrong, and what I believed was wrong was really the process of learning what it means to live a life of
right! I was one mixed‐up chick. Let me give you an moral excellence and in the infant stages of learning
example. how to actually follow through and do it! I’m
Recently Pete told a story on Sunday morning that encouraged by the words of Peter…”the more you
involved revealing that I once told him he was the grow...the more you will become productive and
most selfish person I knew (it’s true, I said that). useful…”
Then he went on to tell of the time years later, when
I expressed appreciation for how he had grown past October 14
this character flaw into a man of moral excellence.
In hindsight, I’d like to amend my original Scripture Reading for today: Ezekiel 37; 1
statement. I’m not sure how selfish he was back Corinthians 1; Psalm 65
then. I wonder now if part of the problem was that
he had healthier boundaries than I possessed at the In today’s recommended reading, we’re entering
time! Certainly my man has grown in character and into the wonderful world of the Corinthians. This
excellence over the years; I’m not minimizing that. Greek city was known for its pagan religion and
But I think it has also helped that I’ve grown too. corruption. New believers in Corinth had a lot of
What I once called selfish was really living with inventory work. Like me, I suspect they were
boundaries—a concept I had no clue about as a sometimes confused about the difference between
newlywed. right and wrong.
Pete has taught me over the years the value of I heard a pastor one time (Bill Hybels, Willow
learning how to to feel less obliged to please people Creek church) talk about a guy that was coming to
and more in tune with pleasing God. Sometimes this his church. The man owned a bar and employed
kind of choosing may be construed as selfish, but it’s scantily clad women, and he had a spiritual
not. awakening. Boy, was Hybels excited! He was certain
that this guy was going to go out and buy some nice
Thought for today: A life of moral excellence leads to baggy t‐shirts for his waitresses and some demure
knowing God better. Knowing God leads to self‐ baggy jeans. He was super pumped when the guy
control. Self‐control leads to patient endurance, and
199
reported that his spiritual awakening had led him to
change his ways. Hybels asked, “In what ways?” October 15
“Well, Pastor, I read in the Bible that a man is
supposed to be honest. I’ve been cutting corners by Scripture Reading for today: Ezekiel 38; 1
watering down the drinks I serve. I’m going to stop Corinthians 2 and Psalm 66
doing that!”
Hybels heart dropped. This man’s “take away” Hopefully we are maturing and becoming people
from the Sunday sermon was that he needed to start who can admit when we are wrong. One of the
giving more alcohol to his patrons! But Hybels roadblocks to admitting that we’re wrong is our
paused to prepare and realized that even in these strongly held convictions regarding what we
things, one needed to celebrate the work of the Holy perceive we’re right about. Sometimes we fail to find
Spirit. Indeed, scripture does say we are to cheat no solutions because we can’t get off the question of
one, and the bartender had been cheating his whether or not we are right. My mother used to say
customers. One day at a time, one step at a time, we that two wrongs don’t make a right. That’s true.
hear and respond to the voice of God. Although the Here’s another way to look at it: one right doesn’t
bar owner didn’t hear what his pastor was hoping, cancel out one wrong. This isn’t a math class. You
he did hear. And he listened. And he responded. can be right about a million things, but if you have
That’s awesome. wronged another in any way, you’re still wrong.
The Corinthians that Paul writes to in this letter Fortunately, we now have skill sets (if we’ve worked
that you may be reading and the young man steps one through nine) to deal with wrongdoing. I
mentored by Bill Hybels share an issue familiar to love what Neil Anderson says, “If you’re right you
many of us: as spiritual beings, we struggle against don’t need an excuse, if you’re wrong you don’t
our surrounding environment. What we’ve learned have an excuse.” When we’re wrong, let’s just admit
about how to live life well may not be quite right. it, move past it, and continue the transformation
We may need to make some necessary adjustments. process. Don’t get stuck on what you’re doing that’s
right and miss the opportunity to figure out what
Thought for today: Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, you’re doing that’s wrong (and driving people away).
he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has
come! 2 Corinthians 5:17 NIV Thought for today: No one can know a person’s
thoughts except that person’s own spirit, and no one
Thought for tomorrow: God is in the business of can know God’s thoughts except God’s own Spirit.
transforming us into our God‐created selves. Over And we have received God’s Spirit (not the world’s
time our inventories will change (this isn’t a rehash spirit), so we can know the wonderful things God has
of the past). For example, years ago I struggled with freely given us. 1 Corinthians 2:10‐12 NLT
honesty. I got into the habit of not being honest with
myself or my parents, and it became a habit. It was a Thought for tomorrow: In 1 Corinthians God uses
character defect that I asked God to remove years Paul to correct the Corinthian peoples’ “wrongs.”
and years ago, and this issue rarely rears its ugly But here’s the part that is just too cool: it is because
head today (but if I grow careless it could return). A we have God’s Spirit in us (as believers) that we can
few years ago I struggled with an issue related to actually accept the instruction and experience
parenting, and several defects of character had to be transformation. Awesome!
weeded out of my heart by God. As I learn, my eyes
are opened to new and different shortcomings that I October 16
need to address. The one I’m currently dealing with
God on wouldn’t have even made my list five years Scripture Reading for today: Ezekiel 39; 1
ago; in fact, I once thought this particular Corinthians 3 and Psalm 67
shortcoming was a talent of mine! How about you?
Are you maturing into your true God‐created self, by If you’re reading along in 1 Corinthians, be
seizing one character‐building opportunity at a time? warned! Paul’s going to put the hammer down and
200
confront them about some seriously bad behaving. extended. Here’s my point: you’ve been through
Remember that prior to the Corinthian people bigger problems than this one, and you knew what
finding their way back to God, they were used to a you had to do to move forward. What happened to
lot of immoral, illegal, and perhaps fattening all those principles? You need to whip them out and
behaviors. In the midst of the dozen or so pagan put them into practice in this situation too.”
temples that flourished in Corinth, temple
prostitutes were regular attenders, and they weren’t Thought for today: So here’s what I want you to do,
there looking for God! They were working gals. So God helping you: Take your everyday, ordinary life—
these folks had a long road to haul to move past your sleeping, eating, going‐to‐work, and walking‐
their hurts, habits, and hang‐ups into a life of around life—and place it before God as an offering.
holiness. (Sound familiar?) Romans 12:1 The Message
Anyway, it’s easy to get distracted by all the
titillating sins of the world and miss the entire point Thought for tomorrow: Sexual sin is a biggie. No
of “wrong.” doubt about it. On any inventory, a serious student
“I just can’t believe she did this to me.” His hurt of the process will put it on the list. But sometimes,
and outrage were clearly etched on his worn and it’s the “smaller sins” that we fail to acknowledge.
weary face. When faced with a ginormous offense earlier in their
“Well, she did wrong; I agree with that point.” marriage, these two knew what to do, even though
“WRONG? That’s not strong enough a word for the the process was very difficult. It was this seemingly
way my wife betrayed me. It’s unforgivable.” smaller wrong that tripped them up. She committed
“Really? Unforgivable?” I ask in a vain attempt to it, and did not promptly admit it; frankly, she didn’t
leave judgment behind and not add fuel to his fire by see it as that serious a matter. His past misdeeds had
adding my own spicy sauce of sarcasm to the skewed her scale of justice. He had messed up bad.
conversation. “Can I ask you a question?” In her view, compared to him, she was a saint. Her
“Sure.” He speaks with confidence. “But I can tell husband, however, took a different view. After all
you the answer before you ask. I’m not forgiving her. the tears were shed, tempers calmed, and shaming
I’m getting a lawyer, filing for divorce AND I want full was set aside, cooler heads prevailed and biblical
custody of the kids.” principles were applied. But let me tell you, it
“Okay, but that wasn’t my question. My question is required all that the three of us had to get to that
this: a few years ago the two of you were in here place. It would have been easy to miss the point. The
telling me a different story. Today’s story is about point in this story is not that he should return
your wife mismanaging your funds. Do you forgiveness since he was forgiven previously. The
remember what the last story that evoked this much point is that amends and restitution should be made.
emotion was about?” His head lowers to his chest, As a believer, he also understands that forgiveness is
and his wife’s quivering chin raises a bit; her shame‐ an option he should seriously consider. So here’s my
filled eyes suddenly interested in making contact point: don’t miss the seemingly smaller sins. Don’t
with mine. hold others hostage to their past simply because you
Silence. could if you tried. Don’t use others’ wrongs as an
More silence. excuse to do wrong yourself. It all matters—even the
“Well, come on, I’ve got all day. But you may not. small stuff.
What brought you guys in here to use up my tissue
supply last time?” October 17
“His affair with my best friend.” She says in a
gentle voice, made more quiet by the memory that Scripture Reading for today: Ezekiel 40; 1
still has the pain‐filled power to knock her off her Corinthians 4 and Psalm 68
pins.
“And I seem to recall that you desired your wife’s I know a guy who is waiting for his wife to make
forgiveness, right? But it wasn’t easy; amends and amends for a very naughty thing she did. He’s been
restitution had to be made. Forgiveness was waiting awhile. This process seems unending. But I
201
tell him to be patient, because she’s working her defect of the evil is not the sin, but the refusal to
way through the steps. She’s never made a proper acknowledge it.” 29
amends before, and if she takes that task on today, Booker T. Washington says a man’s success should
she’s probably going to mess it up. be measured “not so much by the position he has
I wouldn’t give the same advice to someone who is reached as by the obstacles which he has
on step ten. Those who’ve made it this far don’t overcome.”
need to piddle around; they know the deal. For me,
when I deal with an issue of wrong, the more quickly Thought for today: You cannot drink the cup of the
I take care of it, the better—for all concerned. Lord and the cup of demons too, you cannot have a
Here’s another thing I’ve noticed. One unresolved part in both the Lord’s table and the table of
area of wrong tends to bleed over into other areas demons. 1 Corinthians 10:21 NIV
of my life. When I’m wrong and dragging my feet
about making restitution, I find myself more Thought for tomorrow: I believe that Goldberg and
defensive, easier to offend, and just plain miserable. Peck are suggesting that the greatest obstacle all of
This means I end up with more stuff to inventory! us face is our unwillingness to admit wrongdoing.
This is serious stuff, and I pray you and God will
Thought for today: Whoa to those who go to great spend some time wrestling with it…I know I’m going
depths to hide their plans from the Lord, who do to.
their work in darkness and think, “Who sees us? Who
will know?” You turn things upside down, as if the October 19
potter were thought to be like the clay shall what is
formed say to him who formed it, “He did not make Scripture Reading for today: Ezekiel 42; I Corinthians
me”? Can the pot say to the potter, “HE knows 6; Psalm 70
nothing”? Isaiah 29:15‐16 NIV
I think sometimes we believe that if we admit
Thought for tomorrow: I sometimes wonder who in we’ve done something wrong, we believe that it
the world I think I’m kidding. Doesn’t the offended means that we’re a failure. And sometimes it does
know of my wrongdoing? Doesn’t God? How does mean that we’ve failed at something. This is not the
my failure to do the next right thing make the past same thing as believing that we ourselves, in our
wrong thing any better? I’m a big advocate of personhood, are identifiable “failures.”
pausing to prepare but not procrastinating. Promptly Listen. Failure isn’t the end of the world. In fact,
admit wrongdoing, and you’ll be free to move on lots of really awesome people who’ve done amazing,
(and so will others.) miraculous, world‐changing things were considered
failures. We can argue that these goofs who love to
October 18 label others fail to understand the difference
between one whose personhood is defined as failure
Scripture Reading for today: Ezekiel 41; 1 versus failing at a single action. But let’s not quibble!
Corinthians 5; Psalm 69 The point is this: many “greats” in history have an
impressive list of famous failures.
“Those who avert their eyes from evil commit the So, if you’re letting fear of failure hold you back
worst of sins.” 28 from admitting wrongdoing, you may just be slowing
“It is not their sins per se that characterize evil down your ascension to greatness. Becoming the
people, rather it is the subtlety and persistence and person that God intends for you to be is truly the
consistency of their sins. This is because the central greatest achievement we could hope to accomplish
on planet earth.

28 29
Carl Goldberg, Speaking With The Devil, (Penguin Group, Scott Peck, People of the Lie, (New York: Simon & Schuster,
1996), p.2 1983), p. 69.
202
Thought for today: For by the grace given me I say to Although sometimes their confessions are
every one of you: Do not think of yourself more disconcerting, they do provide a chance for us to
highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself engage in meaningful (I hope) dialogue; what more
with sober judgment, in accordance with the can a parent ask for with their children?
measure of faith God has given you. Romans 12:13 Pete and I have often asked ourselves about our
NIV children’s openness, wondering how we got so lucky
to have kids who seem to want us to know them—
Thought for tomorrow: Hoping no one notices that warts and all. We hope that one of the reasons they
you’ve acted like a goof is not a plan destined for are like this is because we’re a family who embraces
success. Trust me, I’ve tried it! When we think of failure.
ourselves with sober judgment, cool stuff happens. Failure is not only an option in our house, we
We notice wrongdoing and do something about it. consider it an opportunity. Failure is what happens
But we also are freed from the fear of failure and when people try things that are beyond their own
loosed to become our true God‐created identities as limited abilities. It’s the place where possibility and
Prince or Princess Warriors! Famous Failures: potential crash into limitations. Failure is nothing
“Scientists had declared the feat impossible…he more than a way to evaluate where we need to go
worked at home under the stern disapproval of his from here.
father.” Who was this man? Guglielmo Marconi, Failure is nothing to be ashamed of. It requires
Father of the Radio, who demonstrated and proved courage and humility. It allows for the fact that
the feasibility of wireless communications always succeeding probably means we’re not
“I was a phantom living in a no‐world. My inner reaching for the sky.
life…was a blank without past, present, or future.” Once we accept the fact that failure isn’t fatal,
Helen Keller—prolific writer and tireless advocate for we’re free to fly.
the handicapped
Two brothers, both high school drop outs….Orville Thought for today: Blessed is the man who
and Wilbur Wright perseveres under trial, because when he has stood
“a sickly, delicate boy, he overcame severe asthma the test, he will receive the crown of life that god has
through strenuous exercise and eventually excelled promised to those who love him. James 1:12 NIV
at sports.” Who was this man? Theodore Roosevelt
Flunked elementary math, dropped out of school, Thought for tomorrow: Other famous failures:
worked for years as an obscure Swiss patent clerk, • “Box office poison” claimed on trade magazine…of
had trouble connecting to people…Albert Einstein 30 Katharine Hepburn
• “You’re not meant for show business. Go home.”
October 20 said to Lucille Ball
• Take a few moments to consider what all of us
Scripture Reading for today: Ezekiel 42; 1 would have missed if Hepburn and Ball had been
Corinthians 7; Psalm 71 deterred by failure.

I love my children. One of the things I particularly October 21
appreciate about them is their ability to admit
wrongdoing. I’m sometimes shocked by the things Scripture Reading for today: Ezekiel 43; 1
my children have admitted to me. The “don’t ask, Corinthians 8 and Psalm 72
don’t tell” policy has a few benefits—mainly, the
opportunity to live in denial! As a family in recovery, To truly care for people requires not caring too
we know denial is not where we want to live. much about their approval or their disapproval.
(John Ortberg)
Pete and I are taking dance lessons! See—miracles
do happen!
30
All quotes excerpted from People Who Shaped The Century, by
the editors of Time-Life Books, Alexandria, Va.
203
One of the things I love about our instructor is his Thought for tomorrow: I’m not suggesting that
vulnerability. In every class, he reminds us that three every failure should be met with relentless
dance studios refused to teach him—telling him he’d determination to continue down the same path
never make it as a dancer. He proved them wrong. we’ve already trod. That’s insanity: doing the same
In the process, he learned how to teach dancing thing over and over expecting different results. How
for dummies. I’m not kidding you; Pete is looking an do we tell the difference between foolishness and
awful lot like Fred Astaire! persistence? I don’t know! But I think that we must
This is truly fascinating to us, because we tried and be willing to step as God speaks, able to admit when
failed at dance lessons once before. I think the key failure is the result of us trying something that
to our success is found in the heart of a guy who was simply isn’t in God’s plan book for our lives, and
willing to be a fool in the pursuit of his passion. In so willing to push through the pain when it becomes
doing, he’s been a tremendous encouragement to clear that God wants us to pursue a course that
us. others might think is silliness. But we must be
warned…
Thought for today: Look deep into my heart, God, But my people would not listen to me. . . .So I gave
and find out everything I am thinking. Don’t let me them over to their stubborn hearts to follow their
follow evil ways, but lead me in the way that time own devices. Psalm 81:11‐12 NIV
has proven true. Psalm 139:23‐24 New Century He gave them their request; but sent leanness into
Edition their soul. Psalm 106:15 (ASV)

Thought for tomorrow: Time has proven that God’s October 23
purposes prevail—sometimes in spite of, other times
because of great failures. If you’re suffering from a Scripture Reading for today: Ezekiel 45; 1
bad case of failure, why not take a good, hard look at Corinthians 10; Psalm 74
what you’re doing wrong, promptly admit it, and
then let God have his way with you? One more famous failure: “We had no money, no
More famous failures…“I was convinced he was laboratory and no help. It was killing work, to stir, for
raving mad…such music would certainly cause a hours at a stretch, the boiling matter in a smelting
scandal.” conductor Pierre Monteux, on Igor basin. In the evening I was broken with fatigue.”
Stravinsky’s “Rite of Spring” Marie Curie, winner of two Nobel prizes—
“to paint in such a way was as bad as drinking petrol radioactivity—radium and polonium—pioneered
in the hope of spitting fire” criticism of Pablo Picasso work in the treatment of cancer.

October 22 Thought for today: Distress that drives us to God
does that, it turns us around. It gets us back in the
Scripture Reading for today: Ezekiel 44; 1 way of salvation. We never regret that kind of pain.
Corinthians 9; Psalm 73 But those who let distress drive them away from God
are full of regrets, end up on a deathbed of regrets. 2
More famous failures: He spent his youth in Corinthians 7:10 The Message
poverty, singing for coins in saloons. His education
was minimal and his musical training Thought for tomorrow: Some “distress” is self‐
nonexistent….Irving Berlin, America’s Music Man inflicted, and we need to own that truth. Other
This man toiled for 20 fruitless years in the quest “distress” is a function of living on planet earth.
of a drug that would stop infections in humans. Distress happens, and we need to learn how to live
Who? Alexander Fleming, who discovered penicillin maturely with that reality. Curie’s “distress” seems
to be other‐worldly in nature—the distress that
Thought for today: I can do everything through him comes when we live God’s big dream for our lives. I
who gives me strength. Philippians 4:13 NIV think God chooses grand epic adventures for some
folks that bring with it a large measure of distress.
204
It’s the kind of sacrifice that one person makes for me; in fact, I can usually empathize. This is a huge
the ultimate good of many. This is a grand privilege stress reducer. I don’t have to carry on imaginary
but still a burden. That kind of “distress” we must fall conversations with anyone; I don’t have to try to
into the hands of a merciful God to endure. Step ten figure out why in the world that person did or did
helps us tease out our distresses and provides a way not do something; I don’t have to feel agitated or
for us to be strengthened as we grow. compelled to manipulate another person to change
to make me feel more comfortable. I’m already
October 24 comfortable. I’m already calm. All we have to worry
about is our side of the street. And when we mess
Scripture Reading for today: Ezekiel 46; 1 up, we know how to take the next right step. I find
Corinthians 11; Psalm 75 that when I’m really serious about this personal
inventory business, I’ve got plenty of stuff to take
In yesterday’s devotional, we discussed different care of without getting so hot and bothered by
kinds of “distress:” self‐inflicted, the kind that comes someone else’s.
to all who live on planet earth, and other‐worldly
distress (when God gives to one a burden to bear for October 25
the benefit of the community).
There’s another kind of “distress” too. It’s the kind Scripture Reading for today: Ezekiel 47; 1
of distress our mind, body, and spirit experience Corinthians 12; Psalm 76
when we hold on to the resentments we form when
others mistreat us. This kind of distress can cause us One morning this week I woke up distressed, and
to get so distracted that we are completely unaware my distress didn’t fit into any of the categories we’ve
of how we may be wronging others. been addressing in recent days! I was anxious and
The Twelve Steps for Christians workbook says: didn’t have the first clue why I was suffering.
“We experience a release from resentment when Fortunately I’m experienced with the distress of
we begin to understand that those who mistreated stress and anxiety, and I knew what to do.
us were also spiritually sick. We extend to them By early evening, I felt great. But I battled to get
the tolerance and forgiveness that God gives us. from point A (anxiety) to B (my life is sooo
When we concentrate on our own inventories in awesome). You realize, of course, that not one single
steps four and ten, we put the wrongs of others circumstance of my life changed that day from 6:00
out of our mind, and we focus on our faults, not a.m. to 6:00 p.m.—except one. I made a decision to
the faults of others.” respond to my anxiety in a way that would leave me
I love this quotation, because it provides a way for with no regrets.
us to measure how we’re really doing. Effective I’m a people watcher. As a student of humanity,
inventories do the following: they cause us to put I’m often amazed at how differently people respond
the wrongs of others out of our minds, and we focus to very similar life experiences. I try to learn from
more on our faults than the faults of others. those who live life well. Here’s one thing I’ve
learned: people who suffer well make wise decisions
Thought for today: Get rid of all bitterness, rage and in the midst of their pain. It is a decision—a very
anger, brawling and slander, along with every form tough choice.
of malice. Ephesians 4:31 Of course, not all my friends and family have a
working knowledge of the twelve steps, but those
Thought for tomorrow: Have you ever tried to talk that live well (with or without this particular tool) all
yourself out of bitterness, rage, and anger? How did seem to have learned how to pay attention to
that work for you? I’ve never once been able to themselves appropriately. For me, learning how to
deliver a stern enough “talking” to myself to stem take a thorough inventory and then respond to what
the tide of an impending rage attack. I have I discover helps me live a healthier, more abundant
observed that when I’m able to stay focused on my life.
own faults, the shortcomings of others do not offend
205
Thought for today: He…”gives strength to the weary anxious and jumpy, with no discernable explanation,
and increases the power of the weak.” Isaiah 40:29 I decided not to dwell on the emotion. Instead, I
NIV acknowledged it to God, asked Him to give me clarity
(since clearly I had none in regards to this
Thought for tomorrow: I love that verse. What experience) and then I invited Him to have his way
greater incentive could we have than to know that with me. What is my next right step today, O Lord?
when we acknowledge our weaknesses, our
vulnerabilities, our anxieties and even all the cool No great trumpets sounded, no faxes arrived from
things in life that are tiring us out, Jesus provides the heavenlies—all of which would have been nice.
strength and increases power. Good grief! Why In their absence, I paused to prepare. Part of that
wouldn’t we want daily to turn all our “stuff” over to time involved remembering what God has taught me
His care and control? in the past when faced with a similar situation.

October 26 Thought for today: I’ll never forget the trouble, the
utter lostness, the taste of ashes, the poison I’ve
Scripture Reading for today: Ezekiel 48; 1 swallowed. I remember it all—oh, how well I
Corinthians 13; Psalm 77 remember—the feeling of hitting the bottom.
Lamentations 3:19 The Message
He…”gives strength to the weary and increases
the power of the weak.” Isaiah 40:29 NIV Thought for tomorrow: I remembered the times in
How exactly does God do this? I don’t know! I the past when I felt just as terrible. I recalled some
don’t know why He chooses to respond to us with of the ways I have chosen to respond to this feeling
such mercy and love either—it’s a God thing. Our (going back to bed, exercising, watching a Lifetime
thing is to continue to tell Him the truth about movie—or several, running outside with my
ourselves and to invite Him to have His way with us. “NorthStar” iPod listening to some of our favorite
tunes [music we love to listen to in our worshiping
Thought for today: I’ll never forget the trouble, the community], eating massive amounts of peanut
utter lostness, the taste of ashes, the poison I’ve butter, calling a friend, isolating, choosing to pamper
swallowed. I remember it all—oh, how well I myself with my favorite healthy foods, getting a
remember—the feeling of hitting the bottom. manicure, ruminating over past hurts, pitching a fit,
Lamentations 3:19 The Message walking around the house looking for something to
fuss about, forgetting my quiet time, extending my
Thought for tomorrow: One abiding principle found quiet time, etc.) I forced myself to acknowledge how
throughout scripture is God’s desire for us to tell each of the above choices impacted me. Some made
Him the truth about how we feel. He doesn’t expect me feel worse; some made me feel better; others
us to sugar‐coat our experiences or play Pollyanna. made no difference in my feelings in the moment –
But that’s not the only thing He wants us to but certainly caused me to have new and different
remember. Before we get to the next part, I pray feelings the next day (some better, some much
that you will find some time today to tell yourself worse). On this day, I chose to go with what had
and God the truth about how you’re feeling. been beneficial in the past. I pray that part of your
step‐ten experience will include the opportunity to
October 27 celebrate your renewed perspective: you have
experience, and you can allow it to instruct you.
Scripture Reading for today: Daniel 1; 1 Corinthians
14; Psalm 78 October 28

Part of my daily devotional time is dedicated to a Scripture Reading for today: Daniel 2; 1 Corinthians
mini‐step ten. I take a few minutes and scope out my 15; Psalm 79
warning lights. When I woke up the other day
206
I’ll never forget the trouble, the utter lostness, the
taste of ashes, the poison I’ve swallowed. I October 29
remember it all—oh, how well I remember—the
feeling of hitting the bottom. Lamentations 3:19 The Scripture Reading for today: Daniel 3; 1 Corinthians
Message 16; Psalm 80
Last night a friend and I were discussing our
propensity to remember the bad times. Feeling There’s a secret that I need to share with you.
anxious is easy for me. Worrying is second nature. As we mature, and if we’ve allowed God to mold
Popping a cork over the injustices of children poorly and shape us, we may find that we remember our
parented is easy. But experience brings with it more past in new ways. People tell me all the time, “I
than bad times; it provides us with an opportunity to didn’t know it then, but in hindsight, God was saving
learn how to remember…more fully. me from myself.”
God says…”I’ll pour pure water over you and scrub
Thought for today: But there’s one thing I you clean. I’ll give you a new heart, put a new spirit
remember, and remembering, I keep a grip on hope: in you. I’ll remove the stone heart from your body
God’s loyal love couldn’t have run out, his merciful and replace it with a heart that’s God‐willed, not
love couldn’t have dried up. They’re created new self‐willed. I’ll put my Spirit in you and make it
every morning. How great your faithfulness! I’m possible for you to do what I tell you and live by my
sticking with God (I say it over and over). He’s all I’ve commands. You’ll once again live in the land I gave
got left. God proves to be good to the man who your ancestors. You’ll be my people! I’ll be your God!
passionately waits, to the woman who diligently Ezekiel 36:26‐27 The Message
seeks. It’s a good thing to quietly hope, quietly hope A new heart‐and‐spirit kind of life changes the way
for help from God. It’s a good thing when you’re we view our past in beautiful ways. We are the
young to stick it out through the hard times. When proud owners of God‐vision goggles, and we see
life is heavy and hard to take, go off by yourself. things differently. But there’s also a dark side.
Enter the silence. Bow in prayer. Don’t ask questions:
wait for hope to appear. Don’t run from trouble. Thought for today: And then you’ll think back over
Take it full‐face. The “worst” is never the worst. your terrible lives—the evil, the shame—and be
Why? Because the master won’t ever walk out and thoroughly disgusted with yourselves, realizing how
fail to return. If he works severely, he also works badly you’ve lived—all those obscenities you’ve
tenderly. His stockpiles of loyal love are immense. He carried out. Ezekiel 36:31 The Message
takes no pleasure in making life hard, in throwing Please don’t let this surprise or discourage you; it’s
roadblocks in the way…Lamentations 3:20‐33 The part of the process. Keep going. Instead of allowing
Message the shame to drive you back to old ways of self‐
medicating, allow Rapha (meaning one who heals,
Thought for tomorrow: An appropriate inventory one stitch at a time) God to heal you. These dark
requires that we remember fully. On my recent bad moments aren’t intended to defeat you, but instead,
day frought with generalized anxiety and a desire to to inspire you. It will help you make decisions that
escape into a pile of pillows surrounded by crunchy you won’t live to regret.
junk food, I chose to not stop at the yucky stuff. I
pressed on. I took the bad full‐face and kept Thought for tomorrow: We shall never encounter
remembering. How about you? Are you getting stuck God in the moment when that encounter takes
in the yucky—walking around the edges of your place. It’s always afterward that we can say, “so that
pain? If so, it may look like a giant ocean—too big to strange situation, that impression, that
walk through, too vast to skirt around. I urge you to unexplainable event was God.” (Jacques Ellul)
follow Jeremiah’s lead in his book, Lamentations.
Keep remembering. You may find that what looked
like an ocean was just a really big but very shallow
puddle that evaporates as you wade into it, full‐face.
207
October 30 People leave you because they are not joined to
you. And if they are not joined to you, you can't
Scripture Reading for today: Daniel 4 and 5; Jude make them stay. Let them go. And it doesn't mean
that they are a bad person it just means that their
Hopefully as we’ve entered into the step‐ten part in the story is over. And you've got to know
phase of the twelve‐step model, we’ve done it with when people's part in your story is over so that you
more tools, maturity, and spiritual resources than don't keep trying to raise the dead. You've got to
we had available to us when we began our journey. know when it's dead. You've got to know when it's
Before we close out this time of inventory, there’s over. Let me tell you something. I've got the gift of
one more detail, one more rock that I need to ask good‐bye. It's the tenth spiritual gift, I believe in
you to consider peering underneath. Is there anyone good‐bye. It's not that I'm hateful, it's that I'm
or anything you’re holding onto that you need to faithful, and I know whatever God means for me to
acknowledge as “not quite right” for the new you? have He'll give it to me. And if it takes too much
Perhaps it’s not a person, but an old attitude or sweat I don't need it. Stop begging people to stay.
outdated belief. T. D. Jakes spoke to the topic of Let them go! (T. D. Jakes)
letting go, and I’m going to leave you with his words
on the subject in today’s devotional. October 31

Thought for today: But he said to me, “My grace is Scripture Reading for today: Daniel 4; Psalm 81 and
sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in 82
weakness.” 2 Corinthians 12:9 NIV
I love roller coasters! They frighten and thrill me. I
Thought for tomorrow: There are people who can dread long lines watching and waiting for my turn to
walk away from you. And hear me when I tell you shake like a leaf and scream like a girl. The first hill is
this: When people can walk away from you, let them always the worst; I always want my mommy as I
walk. I don't want you to try to talk another person reach the top and anticipate the sudden drop in
into staying with you, loving you, calling you, caring altitude that awaits me. But it’s the weirdest thing:
about you, coming to see you, staying attached to as soon as the ride is over, I want to go again! The
you. I mean hang up the phone. When people can entire experience—30 minutes in line filled with
walk away from you, let them walk. Your destiny is dread, one minute of preparation where the guy
never tied to anybody that has left. making minimum wage makes sure you’re buckled in
They went out from us, but they did not really safely, the three‐minute ride of thrills, and the 30‐
belong to us. For if they had belonged to us, they second exit—all of it has less than a minute of pure
would have remained with us; but their going satisfaction. It’s that moment when you say, “Wow!
showed that none of them belonged to us. 1 John That was fun! Let’s go again!”
2:19 NIV Life is like a roller coaster; it is filled with the same
These left us. But they never belonged to us. If they kinds of peaks and valleys as the roller coasters I just
had been a part of us, they would have stayed with love to hate. Frankly, just like the ride experience,
us. Because they left, it is known they did not belong life brings only fleeting moments of pure
to us. 1 John 2:19 (NLV) satisfaction. It’s true. There’s always something to
They went out from us, but they were not of us; for distract, distress, anticipate, prepare for, etc.
if they had been of us, they would have continued As we leave step ten, I hope that all our
with us. But they went out, that it might become remembering will make us better prepared for the
plain that they all are not of us. 1 John 2:19 (ESV) ride of our lives. On this planet, we get only one
They went out from us, but they were not of us; for turn. I pray that we can all stop chasing the
if they had been of us, they would no doubt have moments of pure joy and instead, learn how to live
continued with us: but they went out, that they and love well throughout the entire experience. Yes,
might be made manifest that they were not all of us. we’re going to discover things about ourselves that
1 John 2:19 (KJV) are embarrassing, shaming, and even defective.
208
We’re going to uncover weaknesses, too. Most of all STEP 11 We sought through prayer and meditation
I pray that we will become the kind of people who to improve our conscious contact with God, praying
can remember the big picture: the good, the not only for knowledge of His will for us and the power
quite right, and the awesome. to carry it out.

Thought for today: But he said to me, “My grace is November 1
sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in
weakness.” 2 Corinthians 12:9 NIV Scripture Reading for today: Daniel 5; 2 Corinthians
1 and 2
Thought for tomorrow: May you become your true
God‐created identity! May you hold tightly to the I lived in several cities growing up. My favorite
memories of who God is—His character, His home was in Roanoke, Virginia. I loved riding my
provisions, and His promises! bike up my street and staring right into the face of a
small mountain. I visited my old home place
recently, and boy has it changed! They’ve cut down
the woods and added house upon house. “They
paved paradise and put up a parking lot…” to steal
from a song with a very catchy tune! The homes had
aged a lot too; of course, so have I, so how I
complain? But this I can complain about: they took
away the meadow.
If we walked over a few streets, up a hill, and
through a couple of neighbors’ yards, we’d find
ourselves in a lush, hilly meadow. It was great for
sledding on a snowy day. In the spring, it was
populated solely with yellow wildflowers. It was a
sight to behold! It was amazing! It was a field of
wonder and delight. My brothers and I would
traverse quite a distance to romp in that field.
Nothing could compare to a warm spring day in the
meadow. We’d lie on our backs with our hands
crossed behind our heads and stare at the Carolina‐
blue sky and the oddly shaped clouds. It was without
question the most peaceful time of my childhood.
Regularly we “saw things” in the clouds and
dreamed big dreams.
I can’t tell you the last time I noticed a cloud; I
haven’t seen a decent meadow in years. “He makes
me lie down in green pastures…” is a verse found in
the twenty‐third Psalm that tickles my memory of
peace, wonder, and delight. I delight in every word
of this phrase: He, God…makes, compels,
commands, arranges and provides…for me
personally…to lie down, rest, recline, relax…in green
pastures…beautiful, lush, sweet, warm, restful,
nourishing, inviting, playful pastures.
When was the last time you noticed a cloud
formation and saw a castle? Did you have the time
to watch it drift pass you, into the future? Can you
209
find the nearest meadow in your community? Have able to plop down on the soft carpet of green. The
you had a beautiful daydream this week? Listen for sun shone brightly, warming his back and the top of
the voice of God today, calling out to you, wooing his head. He could whip out his trusty flute; the
you—speaking His heart to yours. Can you hear Him? melodious tunes would calm the sheep—further
I want you to take some time and find a quiet place ensuring David’s respite from rescuing wayward
to relax, recline, and dream big dreams. I want you sheep. The sheep, gregarious by nature, would not
to notice my hand in your world—the color of the only eat to full, they could frolic a bit too—an ideal
sunset, the majesty of the clouds, the blue of the sky, day for a shepherd and his flock.
the beauty of the land…Come away with me, and I
will give you rest…Find time today to follow the good Thought for today: The Lord will fight for you; you
shepherd into a field of rest, hope, and dreams. need only to be still. Exodus 14:14 NIV

Thought for today: He makes me lie down in green Thought for tomorrow: Where is your green
pastures, He leads me beside quiet waters, He pasture? How do you whip out your proverbial flute?
restores my soul. Psalm 23:2‐3 NIV What has to happen in order for you to have enough
time to let the warm sun caress the top of your
Thought for tomorrow: Back in the days of my head? If you don’t know the answer to these
meadow‐dwelling life I believed it was my secret questions, or if you do, but haven’t experienced this
garden, and God made it as a secret gift for my rest for a long, long time, then something is wrong.
brothers and me. I was right. Have you found God’s Ask God to reveal to you His provisions for your rest.
secret gift of rest made just for you? The eleventh Ask Him for the courage to seize the opportunity.
step is an awesome opportunity to explore! Now, as the Nike people like to remind us: “Just Do
It”.
November 2
November 3
3 and 4 Scripture Reading for today: Daniel 7; 1 Corinthians
5 and 6
The Lord is my shepherd…He makes me lie down in
green pastures (a great description written by a guy Have you ever worried that you might miss God’s
who regularly practices the eleventh step in Psalm plans and purposes for your life?
23). How cool would it be if you were a sheep to Today you can reduce your stress, because Jesus
have a green pasture to eat, play, and rest in? The gives us specific principles on how to live a God‐
author of the twenty‐third Psalm was David. While purposed life. This is my favorite portion of this
his brothers were off fighting wars, Dave was scripture: Jesus says, “What I’m trying to do here is
tending the sheep. It was the skill of this young to get you to relax, to not be so preoccupied with
shepherd boy that brought down Goliath the giant. getting, so you can respond to God’s giving. . . Don’t
His brothers and their army were standing around worry about missing out.” Matthew 6:31, 33 The
wondering what to do, and up ran David with his Message
trusty slingshot. He took care of business; down Step eleven provides us with the privilege of
came Goliath. David was well‐versed in the lives of seeking conscious contact with God. If we’re the kind
both sheep and shepherds. of people who often get worried that we’re missing
David lived in a land of rocky inclines, crags, and out, then we have just made a delicious discovery;
dust. He and his sheep usually looked long and hard according to Jesus, we can let that worry go. Notice
for tufts of grass. So imagine the delight of David that this is predicated upon us making a decision for
when he came across a green pasture. Finally! David God—a choice that means we are living a life of God‐
could relax. As long as he kept the sheep from worship.
nibbling all the way to a cliff and carelessly tumbling A life of God‐worship requires that we relax. Don’t
to their death, all would be fine. He probably was you just love this step?
210
green meadows…is the New Living Translation of a
Thought for today: “If you decide for God, living a verse reminding us of God’s provision for our rest.
life of God‐worship, it follows that you don’t fuss Pete and I have three children, one of whom as an
about what’s on the table at mealtimes or whether infant would wake up in the middle of the night filled
the clothes in your closet are in fashion. There is far with terror. He would scream and carry on for hours
more to your life than the food you put in your each night. This craziness went on for over a year.
stomach, more to your outer appearance than the We tried everything. We couldn’t wake him. We
clothes you hang on your body. Look at the birds, couldn’t calm him. When we left him alone, he
free and unfettered, not tied down to a job screamed alone. Finally, I decided that it didn’t
description, careless in the care of God. And you matter what we did or did not do; this kid was going
count far more to him than birds. to cry. I chose to join him in his misery. Every night
“Has anyone by fussing in front of the mirror ever when he began to scream, either his dad or I would
gotten taller by so much as an inch? All this time and go to his room, hold him, and rock him gently. He
money wasted on fashion—do you think it makes still cried. But we were there for the sole purpose of
that much difference? Instead of looking at the making him lie down in a green pasture. He cried in
fashions, walk out into the fields and look at the the warmth of loving arms and the gentle motion of
wildflowers. They never primp or shop, but have you our well‐worn rocking chair.
ever seen color and design quite like it? The ten best‐ Some may argue with the wisdom of this parenting
dressed men and women in the country look shabby choice. But I will say this: he’s a pretty secure kid
alongside them. If God gives such attention to the today. Eventually the time of terror decreased, and
appearance of wildflowers—most of which are never at some point, he slept. I remember the first night he
even seen—don’t you think he’ll attend to you, take slept through the night; I kept getting up to see if he
pride in you, do his best for you? What I’m trying to was breathing! I don’t think I was able to sleep
do here is to get you to relax, to not be so through the night for a month after he was resting
preoccupied with getting, so you can respond to like a…baby.
God’s giving. People who don’t know God and the
way he works fuss over these things, but you know Thought for today: Cast your cares on the Lord and
both God and how he works. Steep your life in God‐ he will sustain you; he will never let the righteous
reality, God‐initiative, God‐provisions. Don’t worry fall. Psalm 55:22 NIV
about missing out. You’ll find all your everyday
human concerns will be met.” 31 Matthew 6:25‐33 Thought for tomorrow: Our “baby” is now a
The Message teenager. I miss the day when I was staying up
waiting on him to stop crying and fall asleep. I miss
Thought for tomorrow: After all the foolish things that sweet smell of baby—his warm, soft skin and
we’ve allowed into our lives, it’s refreshing to steep fuzzy blond hair. I don’t regret one lost moment of
our lives in God‐reality, God‐initiative, and God‐ snooze time. Now we wait for him to come home
provisions! from hanging with his friends. Experience has taught
me that one day we’ll even miss this stage, so we
November 4 remind ourselves to appreciate our late‐night
rendezvous with him. When we rest in green
Scripture Reading for today: Daniel 8; 2 Corinthians meadows, and allow God to lead us beside peaceful
7 and 8 streams, as He renews our strength and guides us
along right paths, God provides us both clarity and
Psalm 23 is a textbook description of what it’s like strength. We believe it was God who guided our
to experience the eleventh step. …He lets me rest in paths in dealing with Michael’s night terrors. New
research reveals how important that may have been
for his development—fostering a sense of security
31
Peterson, E. H. 2003. The Message : The Bible in contemporary and diminishing fears of abandonment. We didn’t
language . NavPress: Colorado Springs, Colo. know that then. In fact, lots of parenting advisors
211
said, “Let him cry it out.” (Sound advice if the kid just show you how to really rest, model His lifestyle,
wants a nighttime playmate.) As we practice casting learn the unforced rhythms of grace, hang with Him,
our cares on the Lord, He really does provide us with and learn to live freely and lightly. I ask you to refuse
all we need! to shrug your shoulders and continue on with your
busy, busy life. Choose a new way.
November 5
November 6
9 and 10 Scripture Reading for today: Daniel 10; 2 Corinthians
11 and 12
At one point in the midst of ministry, Jesus got
aggravated with the unresponsiveness of people. My husband and children love to watch football.
According to Matthew 11, Jesus was teaching and They’re captivated by the sport. Truthfully, they’re
the people just shrugged their shoulders and captivated by all sports. Once I caught one of them
continued on with their busy, busy lives. Madder watching women play pool on a sports channel.
than one might expect from the sinless son of God, Personally, I think that’s extreme sports watching.
Jesus let loose with the crowd and then broke into Most days I don’t care much one way or the other if
prayer. Here’s what came next: they want to stare at a TV screen and call that
Jesus resumed talking to the people, but now bonding. But on Sunday afternoons, I have a
tenderly. “The Father has given me all these things problem with this behavior. The reason Sunday
to do and say. This is a unique Father‐Son afternoon viewing is so distasteful is because Sunday
operation, coming out of Father and Son intimacies precedes Monday. On Mondays, a cleaning service
and knowledge. No one knows the Son the way the shows up at our house. You know what that means,
Father does, nor the Father the way the Son does. don’t you? We need to clean our house—I certainly
But I’m not keeping it to myself; I’m ready to go don’t want someone coming into my house and
over it line by line with anyone willing to listen. Are getting the wrong impression!
you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? My guys don’t understand my urge to run through
Come to me. Get away with me and you’ll recover the house picking up every stray shoe. They actually
your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk think this is strange behavior. As you can imagine,
with me and work with me—watch how I do it. this disconnect between me and my guys has caused
Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay some…shall we say, conflict? Following one
anything heavy or ill‐fitting on you. Keep company particularly heated exchange, a spark of
with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly.” understanding set off a chain reaction that resulted
Matthew 11:27‐30 The Message in what I can only describe as a God moment. I was
huffing and puffing around the house in a state of
Thought for today: People with their minds set on unrighteous indignation and I came upon the gaze of
you, you keep completely whole, steady on their feet, one of my boys. We had just finished our after‐
because they keep at it and don’t quit. Depend on church family meal. During lunch we had been
God and keep at it because in the Lord God you have discussing spiritual things. All of us agreed (at lunch)
a sure e thing. Isaiah 26:3‐4 The Message that we have a pretty awesome God who calls us to
rest –an amazing truth. My rushing around the
Thought for tomorrow: Rest is serious business in house in a cleaning frenzy was telling a different
the kingdom of God. I’m quite sure I don’t story. I was acting like a woman who didn’t know
understand a tenth of the reasons behind this how to rest. My son’s gaze was calling me out gently,
biblical truth. I sure like the sound of it: “Keep asking: What exactly do you believe, mom? If we
company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and can’t celebrate another person’s right to rest, then
lightly.” In a world that promises both but can’t we’re probably not accepting God’s gift of rest
deliver, please accept the invitation of Jesus. Begin intended for us.
today to allow Jesus to help you recover your life,
212
Thought for today: You, Lord give perfect peace to I learned a lot from her response. She was mad at
those who keep their purpose firm and put their trust God because she perceived that God had abandoned
in you. Isaiah 26:3 (GNT) her. She believed that God should be there for her in
her time of need—no questions asked—and leave
Thought for tomorrow: One of the reasons I love the her alone so that she could do her own thing the rest
eleventh step is its pace; prayer and meditation can’t of the time (and from her story it was obvious that
be rushed. When we find ourselves rushing, we are she had been doing her own thing for quite a while).
putting ourselves in a vulnerable position. Rest,
prayer, and meditation lead to peace, sound mind, Thought for today: Teach me to do your will, for you
firm purpose, and trust. are my God; may your good Spirit lead me on level
ground. Psalm 143:10 NIV
November 7
Thought for tomorrow: Once I went on a field trip to
Scripture Reading for today: Daniel 11; 2 Corinthians Monticello with my daughter’s second grade class.
13; Deuteronomy 1 During the tour, the guide spoke of Thomas
Jefferson’s commitment to separation of state and
One time I was sitting in my office minding my own religion. Something about the tone of the comment
business, and a stranger showed up. She had come sparked my daughter’s “need to clarify” (I wonder
by the church to seek out a minister and someone where she got that trait?). Up came her little hand.
sent her to me. She plopped down in one of the Out popped her thinly veiled question (that wasn’t
numerous uncomfortable chairs in the NorthStar really a question at all), “Yes, my teacher told us
Community office and began to express her outrage that. But Jefferson was not trying to give all
at her current state of affairs. She was in the midst Americans freedom from religion; he was trying to
of walking through her own personal valley of the ensure our freedom to worship as we see fit, right?”
shadow of death, and she believed that God was I’m told that it is unusual for a tour guide to become
nowhere to be found. She made her case with speechless.
passion and vehemence for quite a while. Finally, The young woman that came to my office didn’t
she paused to take a breath. get this point. She wanted freedom from religion in
“What does your pastor advise you about this?” I her daily life; she wanted to define “rest” as the
asked. opportunity to sleep in on Sundays, ignore God’s
“Huh?” She replied precepts, develop no spiritual disciplines, etc. But
“Your minister. What counsel has he provided for she was very angry at God’s perceived unwillingness
you in this matter?” to rescue her from the consequences of her choices.
Silence, followed by a, “Well, I don’t go to church. When we’re speaking about Jesus’ desire for us to
I’m a busy person, and Sunday is my day of rest.” rest, it’s not the same thing as saying that God
Truth be told, I know a number of spiritual people endorses spiritual irresponsibility. God wants us to
who don’t attend church on a regular basis. I also be in intimate relationship with him. We can relax
have come in contact over the years with one or two into the relationship because He’s trustworthy; that
people who go to church all the time, but you doesn’t mean we can presume that He sits on the
wouldn’t know it by the way they live. I’m not a sidelines of our lives like a lovesick adolescent,
person who believes that church attendance is an hoping we’ll call. Step eleven is not only a freedom
indicator of our spiritual condition. I personally order that our forefathers fought for; it is a responsibility
my life in such a way that I can attend church every and a privilege.
Sunday. I wouldn’t be anywhere else on Sundays,
but I do not think merely attending church makes all November 8
things right with us spiritually. So don’t misinterpret
my question; I’m not trying to recruit this lady to Scripture Reading for today: Daniel 12;
come to church with me every week. Deuteronomy 2 and 3

213
In step eleven, I love the phrase “improve our because they have a heavenly Father who has done
conscious contact with God.” It implies that just that for them. They know that they must disciple
discipline is going to be required if we’re going to their children, love them, provide for them, teach
remain focused on God (and not grow forgetful of them the ways of the Lord, and equip them to live
Him—something we’re prone to do with annoying large in the land the Lord has provided. They don’t
frequency). For those that are reading through the have to debate about leaving their young ones
recommended scripture reading, we’ve begun the unattended while they go out partying; they don’t
book of Deuteronomy. Moses tries in this book to have to debate whether to let their kid break the
urge his audience to daily live an eleventh step. He laws of underage drinking; they know to teach their
understands our propensity to forget, and he urges kids to respect and obey their earthly authority. It’s
with great fervency and no small amount of dire far easier to choose to eat wisely than it is to get off
warnings about the consequences of forgetfulness. those 20 extra pounds of excess weight that showed
Moses wants all of God’s people to review the past up on our thighs after a season of indiscriminate
and remind each other of God’s promises. Both are eating and lazy living. It’s easier to work diligently to
ways to improve our conscious contact! maintain a thriving marriage than to try to repair a
As David wrote Psalm 23, he was improving his devastated one. It’s easier to teach a child how to
conscious contact when he began with the phrase, live responsibly (and enjoy the fruit of that labor in
“The Lord is my shepherd.” It’s a bold statement. their teen years) than it is to try to harness a teen
Without equivocation David is naming his Higher who has lived his or her life unchecked by parental
Power. As a pastor, I listen to many people expound authority.
upon the reasons that they’re not quite ready to The list goes on and on. I know that you’re
believe. I particularly appreciate those who come thinking – “Easy for her to say!” And I grant you, the
out and say it. Others may not be willing to admit application of these principles takes a lot of practice
their wobbly belief system, but their actions reveal and no small amount of divine intervention. But I
their lack of confidence in full‐throttled believing. promise—trust me— making the decision to live
(Much like I did with my willy‐nilly Sunday afternoon within the boundaries God has set before us is far
behavior I mentioned in yesterday’s devotional.) easier than finding ourselves at the mercy of the
I would suggest to you that it is more restful, and justice system as a result of our own failure to self‐
in many ways easier, to believe boldly than to hedge regulate. Our decision to live as men and women of
your bets. For those who radically believe, they wake character is made; all we’re doing now is trying to
up every morning with fewer decisions to make than figure out the particulars of how to execute this
most. Radical belief requires loving others— choice.
including our enemies. When desperately devoted
followers are armed with this truth, they don’t have Thought for today: Don’t live carelessly,
to mull over how to respond to someone who has unthinkingly. Make sure you understand what the
“dissed” them. They don’t have to craft a clever, Master wants. Ephesians 5:17 The Message
strategic response to one who has taken advantage
of them. They don’t have to plot vengeance. All Thought for tomorrow: Take a moment and
those options are eliminated from consideration consider what you can do proactively to follow your
simply because they choose to believe. good shepherd. It’ll be far easier than having to
Hard‐core believers don’t have to wrestle with backtrack later and find your way back to Him
how they spend their money. They know they must through the wreckage of independent living. Choose
spend less than they make so that they can be ready today to rest in Him.
to help another in need. They don’t have to worry
about how to juggle mounting debt, because they’re November 9
committed to reducing debt so that they will be free
to give when God speaks. Scripture Reading for today: Deuteronomy 4 and 5;
Those that have found their way back to God don’t Hosea 1
have any qualms about sacrificing for their children,
214
I wonder if yesterday’s devotional caused some me. I’m GOD, and I act in loyal love. I do what’s right
resistance to stir in your spirit. If you’re struggling and set things right and fair, and delight in those
under a pile of debt, it probably caused quite a little who do the same things. These are my trademarks.”
“ouch” to hear me suggest that making a decision to GOD’s Decree. Jeremiah 9:23‐24 The Message
live as a desperately devoted follower meant that Brothers, think of what you were when you were
one would also choose to live a fiscally responsible called. Not many of you were wise by human
existence. So let me clarify. What I’m asking you to standards; not many were influential; not many were
consider is that when we have the knowledge of of noble birth. But God chose the foolish things of
God’s will for our lives, and the power to carry it out, the world to shame the wise; God chose the weak
some decisions absolutely do get easier. But I’m not things of the world to shame the strong. He chose
saying it’s easy to follow through. the lowly things of this world and the despised
Let me offer up an example. I have a friend who things—and the things that are not—to nullify the
got herself into some debt—part of it due to over‐ things that are, so that no one may boast before
spending, but some of it also due to an unfortunate him. It is because of him that you are in Christ Jesus,
circumstance. No matter what the cause, she was in who has become for us wisdom from God—that is,
debt. She stewed over this situation for months and our righteousness, holiness and redemption.
months and comforted herself in the process with a Therefore, as it is written: “Let him who boasts boast
few purchases that by any stretch of the imagination in the Lord.” 1 Corinthians 1:26‐31 NIV
would not fall under the category of essential.
Finally, she just couldn’t stand to be living in a way Thought for tomorrow: Maybe sheep are dumb as
that she thought was incongruent with her stated rocks; I don’t know. (My friend says she sure felt
beliefs, and she made the decision to turn her stupid having to tell her friends that her financial
financial situation around. And she did! It took two situation was such that she couldn’t afford to eat
years, but she is now living debt‐free. Do you know out.) But I know this: I envy the simple faith of
what the hardest part of the whole situation was for sheep. I admire the courage of my friend. Once
her? She discovered that she could save a ton of sheep learn the value of following the familiar voice
money by not eating out, and for over a year she of their shepherd, they follow. I know we all desire
chose to not eat out—even when all her friends left to be thought of as bright, smart, articulate people.
church on Sundays and went to some fun place to Who wants to be known as a big old dummy? But
chow down. But she did it! And now when she can here’s the thing: a God‐centered life turns the world
afford it, she eats out—guilt free! My friend is an upside down. Take a few moments today and invite
awesome example of being willing to be a good the Holy Spirit to turn you upside down, so that He
sheep. Remember we have learned that sheep might ultimately set you right‐side up. Ask Him:
cannot be driven; they must be led. I like to imagine when did I think I was wise, but was really a fool?
the good shepherd as He leads His flock, coaching When have I thought I was rich, when I was truly
and coaxing them to follow his voice. The sheep, impoverished? In what areas of my life have I been
recognizing His voice, follow. They intuitively know over‐confident about my personal strengths? In
that to follow the voice of their shepherd is good for what areas of personal weakness have I failed to
them. Oh, to be like sheep! Lots of people who know notice the potential for blessing if I will follow the
more than I do about sheep tell us that sheep are voice of my good shepherd? Don’t you long to
dumb. Perhaps they are right. I suppose we can feel experience the rest that comes from being led by
bright and smart and articulate and…superior to quiet waters? Follow the voice of your good
sheep. I wonder though, is it wise to see ourselves as shepherd…and the awesome example of my faithful
wiser than the average sheep? friend. The journey will not disappoint!

Thought for today: “Don’t let the wise brag of their November 10
wisdom. Don’t let heroes brag of their exploits. Don’t
let the rich brag of their riches. If you brag, brag of Scripture Reading for today: Deuteronomy 6 and 7;
this and this only: That you understand and know Hosea 2
215
sustenance that only He can provide. Be prepared to
Did you know that sheep can go for long periods of notice how God meets your needs today.
time without drinking? It’s true. If the weather is not
too warm, a sheep can survive on the moisture November 11
found in the green pastures. The water in the
grasses combined with the early morning dew on the Scripture Reading for today: Deuteronomy 8 and 9;
grass sustains the sheep. If the shepherd rouses Hosea 3
them early, the dew quenches their thirst. If the
weather turns too warm, if there is no dew, if the Once upon a time, Jesus asked for a drink of water
grass withers and dries out, the sheep grow restless. (see John 4). He had been traveling and was tired
The shepherd then searches for quiet waters where from his journey. In response to His restlessness, He
the sheep can quench their thirst. Restlessness is an sat down by a well. When a woman came to draw
indicator of an unmet need. water, Jesus asked her for a drink. Compared to the
Our dog, Max, thinks he’s human. He definitely wedding where Jesus performed His first miracle (at
does not think he is a black lab. Most labs I know like his mother’s insistence) and turned water into wine,
to play outside, fetch almost anything, frolic in this story seems kind of…dull. He was Jesus; why did
water, and generally act like big dogs. Not our lab. He need to ask for assistance? Couldn’t He just
We take him out to play and he sneaks back in the command the water to jump up out of the well and
house. He has been trained not to sit on the into His mouth? Why not just rebuke his thirst and
furniture, but I admit that when we’re not home he demand it go away? Those two options would add
knocks pillows off the sofa and rests his head on some spice to the account! My goodness, this was
them. He adores a good game of hide and seek. He the Son of God; He healed a blind man, made a
likes to hold hands. He tries to talk. But when he paraplegic walk, drove demons out of a young boy,
really, really needs something, he gets restless. He’s raised the dead, fed thousands with a child’s lunch
trained us well. When he’s restless, we’ve learned to box—what’s up with Him asking some woman for a
ask: Max, are you thirsty? Do you need to go out? drink of water?
Are you ready to eat? Do you want to play? Sheep, If you’ve investigated the life of Jesus, you’ve
dogs, and humans—when we are needy, we feel probably realized that wherever He goes, things
restless. happen. He tells a simple story. Upon reflection, and
sometimes a little research, the listener realizes that
Thought for today: Blessed are those who hunger more is going on in the story than one realizes. The
and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled. key to finding the deeper meaning lies in taking the
Matthew 5:6 NIV time to reflect.
You’re blessed when you’ve worked up a good In this story Jesus is asking for water—a simple
appetite for God. He’s food and drink in the best request. But He is waiting for an invitation to
meal you’ll ever eat. Matthew 5:6 The Message perform a miracle. Could it be that He is sitting and
waiting for you? Is He making you lie down in green
Thought for tomorrow: Sheep get restless when pastures and leading you beside quiet waters so you
they are thirsty and hungry; our dog has similar cues can join the woman at the well and experience a
to restlessness. The human spirit has deeper, more miracle too?
profound needs than sheep and labs. We need
conscious contact with God. Even when we’re not Thought for today: Jesus stood and said in a loud
wise enough to recognize the source of our voice, “If anyone is thirsty, let him come to me and
restlessness, the truth remains: when we are far drink. Whoever believes in me, as the Scripture has
from Him, our spirits are restless. Is your “restless said, streams of living water will flow from within
meter” registering a code red? Is your satisfaction him.”John 7:37‐38 NIV
level low and your sense of unease high? Are you
thirsty? God says that if we’re thirsty, we are Thought for tomorrow: Take a few moments and sit
blessed. Ask God to quench your thirst with quietly. Picture Jesus sitting with you. Like the
216
woman at the well, you may believe that you’re indiscriminate, foolish, impractical, unrealistic, crazy,
responding to a simple request from your good and naïve grace took our measure long ago and
shepherd: come, follow me and I will lead you beside came back with this reading? As Yaconelli so
the quiet waters. Is there more to your story than eloquently states, “The grace of God is
you have previously realized? Jesus isn’t merely indiscriminate, foolish, impractical, unrealistic, crazy,
asking something of you; He passionately desires to and naïve.” As you take a few minutes to lie in green
put something within you: His Holy Spirit. The pastures and to be led by quiet waters, I urge you to
eleventh step is a grand privilege! stop ignoring the parts of yourself that you find
unsavory. It’s time for the endless avoidance to
November 12 come to an end. Allow God to lead you to His grace.

Scripture Reading for today: Deuteronomy 10 and Thought for today: Long before he laid down earth’s
11; Hosea 4 foundations, he had us in mind, had settled on us as
the focus of his love, to be made whole and holy by
In Jesus’ day, Jewish people went out of their way his love. Long, long ago he decided to adopt us into
to avoid traveling through Samaria (see John 4). The his family through Jesus Christ. (What pleasure he
Samaritan people were considered “less than.” No took in planning this!) Ephesians 1: 4‐5 The Message
self‐respecting Jew would be caught dead hanging
out with Samaritans! Are there any places in your Thought for tomorrow: I don’t understand why this
community that you skirt around because they are is true, only that it is true for me. When I’m feeling
unsavory? If so, than you can relate to the Jewish “less than,” ashamed, or bad, it’s hard for me to
people and their penchant for avoiding Samaria. make conscious contact with God. What helps me
Jesus was in the habit of hanging out with people overcome this reluctance to approach the throne of
others ignored and of going places most others grace is remembering the words of Yaconelli; may
avoided. they fill you with joy and courage today!
The grace of God says to you and to me, “I can
make last place more significant than first place. I November 13
will use prostitutes to teach others about
gratitude. I will use lepers as examples of Scripture Reading for today: Deuteronomy 12 and
cleanliness. I will take men who persecute the 13; Hosea 5
church and make them its pillars. I will take the
dead and give them life. I will take uneducated Samaria wasn’t the only thing that most people
fishermen and make them fishers of men. God’s avoided in the story of John 4. If you read the
grace does not exist to make us successful. God’s account of the Samaritan woman at the well, you’ll
grace exists to point people to a love like no other see that her lifestyle probably isolated her from the
love they have ever known. A love outside the lines. other women in the neighborhood. (According to
The grace of God is indiscriminate, foolish, Jesus, she had been the wife of five husbands and
impractical, unrealistic, crazy, and naïve. (Selected was currently with a man to whom she was not
passages from chapter 8 of Dangerous Wonder by married—scandalous behavior for her day.) Can you
Michael Yaconelli.) imagine her life? Do the other women fear her?
Sometimes we not only avoid unsavory “others,” Despise her wanton ways? As she walks down the
we also avoid the unsavory parts of ourselves. Is street, is her head bowed? Do others avert their
there some hard truth about yourself that you’ve gaze to avoid making eye contact? Is she lonely?
been avoiding? Do you struggle to make eye contact Restless? Does she have an unquenchable thirst for
when you face a mirror? Is there a story in your life something that she can’t define? Regardless of her
that fills you with shame any time your mind flits current condition, Jesus asks her for a drink, and she
across the memory? In a world that measures our is amazed that he would stoop so low as to make
worth by the yardstick of perform, perform, this request of her.
perform, isn’t it comforting to realize that God’s
217
Some theologians have speculated that this living water. Like the Psalmist says ‐ “He is like a tree
woman showed up at the well at an unusual time planted by streams of living water, which yields its
(women didn’t usually fetch water in the middle of fruit in season and whose leaf does not whither.
the day for various reasons), probably because she Whatever he does prospers…” Psalm 1:3 NIV. I
was isolated, shunned, and maybe even too believe if I were planted by a body of water, my life
ashamed to show her face. Whether this is true or would be sweet. If I’m really dreaming, I want to be
not, one thing we know for sure. With five husbands planted by a BIG body of water. Perhaps the Atlantic
and a live‐in boyfriend—in an age when this simply Ocean—that would work for me! (Please don’t get
didn’t happen without huge societal consequences— sidetracked by the fact that the Psalmist and I were
this woman was having a hard time finding any kind probably referring to wildly different experiences; I
of satisfaction! don’t think David was wishing for a beach house!
Work with me here, I’m building a case for a big
Thought for today: Jesus answered her, “If you knew dream and I’m not above taking scripture out of
the gift of God and who it is that asks you for a drink, context to make my point!) I proceeded to suggest
you would have asked him and he would have given to my dearly beloved that I could make a case for a
you living water. . . . Everyone who drinks this water beach house using Psalm 23. Doesn’t God say He
[picture Jesus nodding toward the well] will be thirsty wants us to be led beside quiet waters? My husband
again, but whoever drinks the water I give him will doesn’t quite agree with my wildly loose application
never thirst. Indeed, the water I give him will become of the text. But I do think we all long for and
in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life.” appreciate the soothing properties of water. If that’s
John 4:10, 13 NIV true, then why do we run so hard from our resting
place—our quiet waters?
Thought for tomorrow: “I can’t get no satisfaction”
is a line from an old song that may describe your life. Thought for today: My people have committed a
I think Jesus is saying to us all, “Yes you can get compound sin: they’ve walked out on me, the
satisfaction, but it will come only through me. Come, fountain of fresh flowing waters, and then dug
taste what I have to offer.” I pray that today you will cisterns – cisterns that leak, cisterns that are no
lie down in green pastures and allow God to lead you better than sieves.. . . Take a long, hard look at what
beside quiet waters—two very beautiful eleventh‐ you’ve done and its bitter results. Was it worth it to
step disciplines. have walked out on your God? Jeremiah 2:13,19,
The Message
November 14
Thought for tomorrow: Jeremiah’s people didn’t see
Scripture Reading for today: Deuteronomy 14 and their own sin. They blamed their troubles on God.
15; Hosea 6 Sometimes I blame my restlessness because my
house doesn’t sit at the edge of the Atlantic Ocean!
One night my husband and I were left at home Before we go any further in our devotional study, do
alone; all our children were off enjoying their own you have a leaky cistern that you’ve picked up with
friends. We decided to have a date night! As we sat the hopes of finding satisfaction—and forgotten God
over a romantic dinner for two (translation: we in the process? I do love the dream of a place at the
weren’t at a fast food restaurant with several beach. But what I desire more than anything is to be
teenage boys), I did something that my husband the kind of person who yields fruit both in‐ and out‐
doesn’t like at all: I asked him to daydream. He’s a of‐season. I’m not going to put my hope in a place at
pretty practical, down‐to‐earth kind of guy, and the beach doing for me what only God can! Ask God
daydreaming isn’t his idea of a hot date. to reveal to you any leaky cisterns that you need to
Since we’ve been married almost 30 years, he discard. Then, allow his wild and crazy grace to wash
knew just how to respond. He said to me, “You go you clean.
first!” So I did. I told him that I dreamed of a day
when we would be literally planted by streams of
218
November 15 November 16

Scripture Reading for today: Deuteronomy 16 and Scripture Reading for today: Deuteronomy 18 and
17; Hosea 7 19; Hosea 8

I didn’t go to church often as a child. Sometimes in “He restores my soul…”Psalm 23…
the summer my grandparents took me. Once I went He restores my soul. Wow! Can you imagine what
to Vacation Bible School. Even I, a relatively it would be like to be completely restored? Maybe
uneducated child of God, knew the story of David. you’re too young to appreciate the value of
He’s the guy who shot Goliath with a slingshot. He’s restoration! But since I’m getting older by the day,
the best king ever! He was a man after God’s own I’ve come to appreciate the value of much‐needed
heart. He committed adultery, got his lover restoration. We’re restoring our kitchen. It may be
pregnant, and then had her husband killed to hide superficial, but anyone who has tried to restore a
his crime? Yes. All of these things are true of David. kitchen knows it’s never simple! Our house is
(That last part I only learned as an adult.) He also approaching its big 40th birthday, and the time has
wrote Psalm 51, after the prophet Nathan came to come for some nips and tucks. Our ovens are original
him and confronted him with his sin. to the house; they’re out of here! The countertops
and the cabinet doors are being retired as well. New
Thought for today: Have mercy on me, O God, lighting appears to be in our future too. Since the
according to your unfailing love, according to your bones of the kitchen are fine and other restorative
great compassion, blot out my transgressions. Wash measures have been taken previously on the floors,
away all my iniquity and cleanse me from my sin. For walls, etc. this is more of an update than a redo.
I know my transgressions, and my sin is always
before me. Against you, you only, have I sinned and Thought for today: I’ll pour pure water over you and
done what is evil in your sight, so that you are proved scrub you clean. I’ll give you a new heart, put a new
right when you speak and justified when you judge. spirit in you. I’ll remove the stone heart from your
Surely I was sinful at birth, sinful from the time my body and replace it with a heart that’s God‐willed,
mother conceived me. Surely you desire truth in the not self‐willed. I’ll put my Spirit in you and make it
inner parts; you teach me wisdom in the inmost possible for you to do what I tell you and live by my
place. Cleanse me with hyssop, and I will be clean; commands. You’ll once again live in the land I gave
wash me, and I will be whiter than snow. Let me hear your ancestors. You’ll be my people! I’ll be your God!
joy and gladness; let the bones you have crushed I’ll pull you out of that stinking pollution. Ezekiel
rejoice. Hide your face from my sins and blot out all 36:25‐29 The Message
my iniquity. Create in me a pure heart, O God, and
renew a steadfast spirit within me. Do not cast me Thought for tomorrow: What about you? Could your
from your presence or take your Holy Spirit from me. soul use a few nips and tucks, or do you need major
Restore to me the joy of your salvation and grant me renovation? Have you been taking pretty good care
a willing spirit, to sustain me. Psalm 51:1‐12 NIV of your core structure but realize that some
tweaking is in order? Whatever state of disrepair to
Thought for tomorrow: Perhaps you don’t think you the soul, I’ve got good news for you! God is in the
deserve green pastures and quiet waters. Okay. restoration business! Take a few moments to dream
Maybe you are right. But know this: God desires for big. What is it about you that needs restoring? Make
you to have them, not because of who you are, or a list. Then read through your list to God, asking Him
who you are not, but because of who He is. Won’t to show you the next right step in His plan for your
you accept His gift today? I hope you’ll trust me on soul renovation. This is in keeping with the principle
this. If you’ll continue to diligently work a step of asking for knowledge of His will and the power to
eleven, you’ll get better at seeing yourself as God carry it out. Having done this, begin practicing the
sees you—holy and dearly loved. fine art of believing and be alert to God’s cleansing
presence—the new heart and new spirit within you.
219
Notice how your heart is increasingly God‐willed. Thought for tomorrow: During your prayer time
Thank God for how He is making it possible for you today, do your part. Be brutally honest with yourself
to do His good, pleasing, and perfect will. about your need for renovation. Perhaps you will
find that you need to add to the list that you began
November 17 yesterday. Sit quietly and wait for the relief that only
honesty can bring. Your heavenly Father is more
Scripture Reading for today: Deuteronomy 20 and than capable of replacing “old things” with glorious
21; Hosea 9 “new things.”

One of the things that I particularly appreciate November 18
about my current home improvement project, the
kitchen renovation, is the fact that I don’t have to do Scripture Reading for today: Deuteronomy 22 and
it all by myself! Different people with unique skill 23; Hosea 10
sets are painting, tearing out, and replacing various
“old things” with wonderful, hand‐picked “new “He restores my soul…”
things.” Some parts of the project only my husband
and I could do. We had to decide on the particulars The Hebrew word for restoration (shuwb) is rich
of the project, select the materials, the colors, and with meaning. Three hundred ninety‐one times in
the right people to do the work. Along the way, we scripture it is translated as “return,” 248 times it is
sought advice. We got second and third opinions. written as “return again,” 123 times “turn,” and
Ultimately, we had to decide what we were going to “turn back” or “turn away” for a combined 121
do with our kitchen—that was our part. times. The next most common translation of this
Soul restoration is a lot like my kitchen project. word is found in Psalm 23: 39 times it is “restore.”
Some parts of it we do ourselves, but most of it is The Lord is my shepherd, He returns my soul.
done by someone else: God Himself! The greatest The Lord is my shepherd. He returns again my soul.
thing about soul work is that I truly believe that the The Lord is my shepherd, He turns my soul.
hardest part of the job is done by someone else: The Lord is my shepherd, He turns back my soul.
God, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit. The Lord is my shepherd, He turns away my soul.
Our part is to acknowledge the need for The Lord is my shepherd, He restores my soul.
restoration and to choose to accept God’s help. For Did you know that you were created to find your
the longest time we denied that we needed to do way back to God? Long before your parents laid eyes
any more work on our kitchen. We put it off. But on each other, God had you in mind. Our brains
once we made the decision to turn our kitchen over don’t have the circuitry to understand the fact that
into the hands of a kitchen restorer, it was a great we were known by God before the measuring of
relief. When I took off my blinders, I saw that my time.
kitchen really, really needed a good bit of work.
Frankly, it was a relief to get to the point of Thought for today: It’s in Christ that we find out who
acknowledging the truth. we are and what we are living for. Long before we
first heard of Christ and got our hopes up, he had his
Thought for today: So here’s what I want you to do, eye on us, had designs on us for glorious living, part
God helping you: Take your everyday, ordinary life – of the over‐all purpose he is working out in
your sleeping, eating, going –to‐work life – and place everything and everyone. Ephesians 1:11‐12 The
it before God as an offering. Embracing what God Message
does for you is the best thing you can do for him.
Don’t be so well‐adjusted to your culture that you fit Thought for tomorrow: Recently I was teaching a
into it without even thinking. Instead, fix your class and afterwards a participant came up and
attention on God. You’ll be changed from the inside rebuked me. “You should not talk about your
out. Romans 12:1‐2 The Message struggles like that. You’re a minister, you’re not
supposed to have problems like that.” Well, news
220
flash. I do. I lose sight of the truth that long before I Thought for tomorrow: Imagine what it would feel
heard of Christ, He had His eye on me! Long before I like to live in a body that houses a soul that is
knew I was lost, He was eagerly anticipating my completely restored. It would mean that you know
return—finding my way back to Him. Even as a who you are. It would mean that you have God‐
desperately devoted follower of Him, I still need to confidence even if your self‐confidence ebbs away. It
return, return again, turn, turn back, turn away, and would mean that you know that you know that you
accept His restorative healing powers. Step eleven is know that the plans of God cannot be thwarted, and
a structured reminder of my own need for that you are completely abandoned to the plans of
restoration. Take some time now to pray for God. It does not necessarily mean that you know
yourself, and those you love—that all of us would where you’re headed. It does not mean that you will
find our way back to God and accept the restoration have no obstacles, hardships, trials and tribulations;
of our souls—the gift Christ so longs to deliver. in fact, you will have all those things. It doesn’t mean
that you’re free to do whatever you want whenever
November 19 you want to do it. But it does mean this: when we
relinquish control to God, He gives us a promise. If
Scripture Reading for today: Deuteronomy 24 and we will be responsible to Him, He will take
25; Hosea 11 responsibility for the outcome. Sometimes the
outcome will be baffling. But a restored soul knows
I can’t remember exactly how long it has been, but that what we have in the seen world is not our
one summer I wore myself out. Being the spiritual ultimate reality. I hope you will spend some time
people that we are, we ran away to the beach! today quietly listening to the soft voice of God
(Don’t forget that God leads us beside quiet waters!) whispering from the unseen world into your seen
Honestly, I can’t say that our spirituality had much to world life.
do with that decision. I just know that when I’m
worn out, I find the beach a wonderful place to be November 20
restored. (I love how Psalm 23 puts no restrictions
on where God is going to restore us; He can do it Scripture Reading for Today: Deuteronomy 26 and
anywhere ‐ why not the beach?) As we were driving 27; Hosea 12
down the highway, I could feel the muscles in my
body begin to unwind. My aching back began to While undertaking our awesome kitchen
relax against the seat, my stomach began to untie restoration process we had a lot of choices to make.
itself from the perpetual knot it had been in for Laminate, granite, solid surface, or a host of other
weeks, even my toes and fingers began to unwind choices in countertops? Decisions, decisions,
and gently relax. decisions ‐ the only part of the project that I really,
Take some time to allow your body the really cared about was making room for eating at the
opportunity to be still and relax. Give yourself counter. I wanted some really cool bar stools to go in
permission to believe the truth of who God is. He’s front of that new eating spot too. I suspect that my
in control, so you do not have to be. He has plans husband is getting a little tired of hearing my
and purposes for you that are more wonderful than requests.
you can imagine. One night our awesome countertop‐fixer‐upper
guy came by for final measurements. Our son turned
Thought for today: Don’t be afraid. I’ve redeemed to his father and said, “Dad, are you going to
you. I’ve called your name. You’re mine. When supervise this project so that mom doesn’t go hog
you’re in over your head, I’ll be there with you. When wild?” (Don’t you just hate it when your kid knows
you’re in rough waters, you will not go down. When you so well?)
you’re between a rock and a hard place, it won’t be a I promptly replied, “Your dad wants me to have
dead end – because I am God, your personal God. the kind of kitchen I want.”
The Holy of Israel, your Savior. Isaiah 43:1b‐3a The My husband added, “…within reason.”
Message
221
Have you ever had a conversation like this with you find some wide‐open space in your life today,
God? It’s one of those days when you have a lot of delivered by the hands of the good shepherd.
requests, and some of them are near and dear to
your heart. They are so dear, in fact, that you can’t Thought for today: Take a deep breath, GOD; calm
imagine God NOT wanting to answer them all with a down—don’t be so hasty with your punishing rod.
resounding, “YES!” Your sharp‐pointed arrows of rebuke draw blood; my
Step eleven invites us to ask questions of God. So backside smarts from your caning. I’ve lost twenty
ask, and ask boldly. There’s nothing wrong with that; pounds in two months because of your accusation.
it’s scriptural! But after the asking, one must be My bones are brittle as dry sticks because of my sin.
willing to wait for God’s response—not jumping in I’m swamped by my bad behavior, collapsed under
like I did with a quick assurance that of course God gunnysacks of guilt. The cuts in my flesh stink and
wants to meet all our needs. grow maggots because I’ve lived so badly. And now
God does want to meet our needs; but He knows I’m flat on my face feeling sorry for myself morning
the best way to accomplish the restoration of soul to night. All my insides are on fire, my body is a
process. I’m all excited about bar stools and new wreck. I’m on my last legs; I’ve had it—my life is a
countertops, but God’s vision is far larger than mine. vomit of groans. Lord, my longings are sitting in plain
He may have far better things planned for me than sight, my groans an old story to you. My heart’s
barstools and countertop eating! about to break; I’m a burned‐out case. Cataracts
blind me to God and good; old friends avoid me like
Thought for today: He gave them their request; but the plague. My cousins never visit, my neighbors stab
sent leanness into their soul. Psalm 106:15 (AMP) me in the back. My competitors blacken my name,
devoutly they pray for my ruin. But I’m deaf and
Thought for tomorrow: My prayer for each of us mute to it all, ears shut, mouth shut. I don’t hear a
today is that we put no limits on who, what, when, word they say, don’t speak a word in response. What
where, or how God might choose to restore our I do, GOD, is wait for you, wait for my Lord, my God—
souls. I pray that we will not be so demanding in our you will answer! I wait and pray so they won’t laugh
request that God gives us that request but allows a me off, won’t smugly strut off when I stumble. I’m on
leanness to enter into our soul. I pray that today we the edge of losing it—the pain in my gut keeps
will leave our time with God not only restored, but burning. I’m ready to tell my story of failure, I’m no
ready—ready to be who God created us to be today. longer smug in my sin. My enemies are alive and in
action, a lynch mob after my neck. I give out good
November 21 and get back evil from God‐haters who can’t stand a
God‐lover. Don’t dump me, GOD; my God, don’t stand
Scripture Reading for today: Deuteronomy 28 and me up. Hurry and help me; I want some wide‐open
29; Psalm 38 space in my life! Psalm 38 The Message

David knew some things about loving God and losing Thought for tomorrow: When God provides both
his way too. Notice how in Psalm 38 David draws a knowledge and power and we mix it with a
direct connection between his soul‐sickness and the willingness to be led, life leads us into some wide‐
sickness of his body. What David is longing for is open spaces!
“some wide‐open space” in his life. Can you relate?
Spend some time today asking God if any of your November 22
physical ailments, your relationship problems, etc.
are more related to soul‐sickness than you might Scripture Reading for today: Deuteronomy 30 and
have previously thought. Remember: The Lord is my 31; Psalm 123
shepherd—I shall not be in want. He makes me lie
down in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet I’ve often wondered why the same David who had
waters—he restores my soul. Beautiful, isn’t it? May the courage to trust in God to help him slay Goliath
with only the implements of a shepherd boy ended
222
up in a tawdry sexual encounter with Bathsheba. frustration. People don’t click on messages about
Have you ever done anything that was truly shocking recovery unless they’re in pain; their frustration level
and out of character? Afterwards, did you wonder is already through the roof. Shame is a constant
why? Were you devastated and filled with sorrow? I companion, and many have been burned by Bible‐
wonder if there is any sorrow in your life that is bashing long before they found our teachings on the
holding you back from experiencing the restoring of Web.
your soul. The first Bible study I ever attended almost cured
I was sitting in a support group meeting and one of me of my spiritual thirst. My husband and I were
our fellow participants had eyes that were pools of newlyweds, and our church provided an awesome
sorrow. We were going over some material and he couple’s Bible study experience. Our teachers were
had been silent for the entire session. Suddenly, he phenomenal. I don’t have any idea if this is accurate
had what can only be described as a God moment. or not, but I felt like the only novice Bible student in
“I get it! All my life I’ve asked myself, why do you the room. I asked a lot of questions, and some of
keep doing such stupid things? Now I understand them were probably really stupid sounding to the
why.” I hope his new understanding will support his other participants. Fortunately, I didn’t understand
heart’s desire to stop doing such stupid things! this at the time, and so I was undeterred in my
pursuit of God. I forget what passage we were
Thought for today: For God can use sorrow in our studying, but I remember clearly the question I
lives to help us turn away from sin and seek asked.
salvation. We will never regret that kind of sorrow. 2 “Do you think that one of the reasons for being
Corinthians 7:10 NLT faithful in practicing spiritual disciplines (step 11) is
Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new so that when difficult times come we have stored up
creation; the old has gone, the new has come! 2 within us spiritual resources that help us cope?”
Corinthians 5:17 NIV One of the other “spiritually mature” newlyweds
in the group responded quickly and with massive
Thought for tomorrow: Will you take some time amounts of distain. “That is ridiculous. If you have
now to reflect on that question, asking God to reveal enough faith, you don’t have difficult times. God just
to you a new and better way to understand your keeps blessing you and blessing you. When you get
sorrow? You are a new creation. As a believer, you more mature, you’ll realize that a faith‐filled person
have the capacity to accept God’s help and to stop never experiences hardship, even if hard things
doing those stupid things that you truly never happen—because God doesn’t let you feel pain, only
wanted to do in the first place! But you must be peace. One day you may have this experience like I
willing to turn away, turn back, be restored… do.”
I believe that the teachers of this study tried to
November 23 mop up the damage from her frosty response, but I
don’t remember. I remember the implied message
Scripture Reading for today: Deuteronomy 32 and of this oh‐so‐mature believer. She wanted me to
33; Psalm 124 know that trials don’t happen to faithful followers of
God (and if I’d increase my faith maybe I’d know that
“And even though I walk through the valley of the too). According to her theology, true believers are
shadow of death…” Psalm 23:4 NIV always perky.
Some of our NorthStar Community videos are on a I didn’t know enough about God and His word to
Web site called “You Tube”. This site attracts quite a have a meaningful dialogue with her, but I had a
diverse audience, and some people find my pairing hard time believing that she was right. I’ve since
of recovery and spiritual matters quite offensive. discovered many passages of scripture that refute
They want no mention of a “God” of any kind mixed her blessing upon blessing without trials‐and‐
in with the recovery process, and they are often troubles theology.
quite blunt in their expressions of distaste! When I
read these missives, I can totally relate to their
223
Thought for today: Do not be afraid…I am your future years and hope for greater clarity and
shield, you very great reward. Genesis 15:1 NIV appreciation for what God has saved us from—
rather than fidgeting over what we perceive we have
Thought for tomorrow: All of us experience a lost.” Years have passed, and I’m still not all that
journey through the valley of the shadow of death. clear about why this experience happened.
No one is exempt. It is unproductive and unbiblical So what if it really was all about the loss? Have you
to go through life assuming that we can be immune ever heard of the original example of true suffering:
to difficult trials. It’s shaming to tell people that their Job? (Don’t get confused. I’m not comparing my
struggles are simply the result of too little faith. Our family to Job! We haven’t suffered a second in this
stories are more complex than the old “Be‐good‐ time of our life; we’ve been merely a tad
and‐nothing‐bad‐will‐happen‐to‐you philosophy.” uncomfortable with our feelings.) Job is a good guy
And if in all this conversation about God and our to study because he suffered in such a “normal”
need to find our way back to Him, you get the idea way. He suffered with health issues, family loss, and
that I’m saying that this is a simple thing, you’re mis‐ financial disaster. Why? Did he cause it? Did he eat
hearing me. It’s not simple. It is true—lying down in too much fast food and not get enough exercise?
green pastures, walking beside quiet waters, Were Job and his wife negligent in their parenting,
allowing God to restore our souls—all of that thereby causing grave harm to fall upon their
strengthens us through our valley‐of‐the‐shadow‐of‐ offspring? Was Job a spendthrift, mismanaging his
death experiences. A walk through darkness is not personal and professional finances to the point of
an indicator that God has abandoned us, nor does it bankruptcy? No. Job’s suffering was of the most
necessarily mean that we took a wrong turn. mysterious kind: inexplicable and undeserved.
Sometimes it’s a mystery as to why we find Did Job’s suffering result in him choosing to
ourselves in the midst of darkness. What we can behave badly? No. God described Job in Job 1 like
know is that through the experience we can “fear this, “Have you noticed my friend Job? There’s no
not” because God is with us. And by the way, I do one quite like him—honest and true to his word,
believe that as we practice step eleven each and totally devoted to God and hating evil.” Amazing. It
every day, it does prepare us for the inevitable trials was Job’s faithfulness that caught the eye of God,
and temptations that buffet us—no matter how far and it was God Himself who allowed Satan to bring
along we are in our maturation journey. great suffering into the life of Job. I don’t know a
single person bold enough to dare think they have
November 24 the book of Job all figured out. But one thing we can
learn and apply: when we are in the midst of our
Scripture Reading for today: Deuteronomy 34 and valley of pain, God is with us, speaking to us, open to
Psalm 83 us, and available for us. Take your valley to God
today, and see what He wants to provide you in the
A few years ago our family received some midst of your own personal dark season.
particularly disappointing news. In the grand scheme
of things, it was no big deal. But I would be lying if I Thought for today: Be still, and know that I am God I
said it didn’t leave us with some residual negative will be exalted among the nations. I will be exalted in
feelings. We consciously chose to remember Psalm the earth. Psalm 46:10 NIV
23 as we came to grips with our new, altered reality
and expectations. A day didn’t pass when someone Thought for tomorrow: When our valley‐of‐the‐
didn’t find a new hidden blessing and share that with shadow‐of‐death experience occurred, I was grateful
the rest of the family. When all things were taken to have the spiritual discipline of step eleven
into account –as best as we humans could assess— available as a tool in my spiritual tool belt. Whether
we concluded that God really is the good shepherd, you’re undertaking this step in response to suffering
and we desperately desired to follow His lead. At the or embracing it as a daily discipline simply because
time when all this disappointment was fresh and you believe it’s a good idea, I want to encourage you
painful, I wrote, “I eagerly expect to look back in to learn how to love the eleventh step. It always
224
makes good sense, even when our circumstances that long litany of hostility he plowed through. That
baffle! will shoot adrenaline into your souls! Hebrews 12:1‐3
The Message
November 25
Thought for tomorrow: David reminds us that we
Scripture Reading for today: Joshua 1 and 2 must “walk through” our dark times, not around
them. I find that many people desire fitness,
One of the best decisions we ever made at freedom, and soul restoration. Few are willing to
NorthStar Community was when we decided to add walk the journey that will ultimately take us to our
physical fitness to our list of passionate pursuits. desired destination. I pray that you will not quit the
Susan and Bugsy King stepped up to the plate and race set before you, even if you find yourself on the
provided awesome leadership. Every Tuesday leg of the journey enveloped in darkness. The
morning a bunch of women get together and punch eleventh step doesn’t promise us smooth sailing; it
and kick and jump and run our way toward fitness; does, however, promise us the possibility that God
really early on Tuesday and Thursday mornings the will give us knowledge of His will and the power to
guys gather together and do manly exercises. We carry it out.
love it—when we’re just talking about it during the
week! November 26
My husband says that in his men’s group, they do
so many different kinds of pushups that he can’t Scripture Reading for today: Joshua 3 and 4
even remember all their names. Our fearless
women’s leader pushes us past our comfort zone I know that we all enjoy running through green
and is the master at wiping away our smiles of pastures and sitting beside quiet waters soaking up
complacency. Just when you think you have reached the beauty and delights of God’s created things. But
a new level of competency, she ups the stakes, and there’s more going on than we know. You weren’t
we all find ourselves red‐faced and grimly silent in created merely for the amusement of God. You were
our determination to conquer our physical created so that you might be a part of His grand epic
shortcomings. adventure; you have a vital part in the drama that is
This morning I received a call from one of my being played out before us.
friends who is in rehab. She wants out. It’s I wonder what would happen if we made a list of
uncomfortable. There are some “unsavory” all our perceived trials and tribulations. What if we
characters in rehab, and she feels that she shouldn’t took that list and began to think of each one as an
have to associate with them. My friend is looking for opportunity for training? Not just any training, but
a softer, gentler way around her substance abuse training for something we don’t even know is
issues. coming—something far beyond our imaginings.
What if it was more significant than training for
Thought for today: Do you see what this means—all the Olympics? What if our mission was going to have
these pioneers who blazed the way, all these more profound, lasting consequences than winning
veterans cheering us on? It means we’d better get on the NCAA basketball championship? What if we
with it. Strip down, start running—and never quit! understood our mission to be so essential to future
No extra spiritual fat, no parasitic sins. Keep your generations and their well being that failure was no
eyes on Jesus, who both began and finished this race longer an option?
we’re in. Study how he did it. Because he never lost Would you run? Would you fight? Would you
sight of where he was headed—that exhilarating train? Would you be unstoppable?
finish in and with God—he could put up with
anything along the way: cross, shame, whatever. Thought for today: God is educating you; that’s why
And now he’s there, in the place of honor, right you must never drop out. He’s treating you as dear
alongside God. When you find yourselves flagging in children. This trouble you’re in isn’t punishment; it’s
your faith, go over that story again, item by item, training, the normal experience of children. Only
225
irresponsible parents leave children to fend for brazen contempt, doing this great evil?” 2 Samuel
themselves. Would you prefer an irresponsible God? 12:1,7‐9 The Message
We respect our own parents for training and not
spoiling us, so why not embrace God’s training so we Thought for today: So don’t sit around on your
can truly live? While we were children, our parents hands! No more dragging your feet! Clear the path
did what seemed best to them. But God is doing for long‐distance runners so no one will trip and fall,
what is best for us, training us to live God’s holy best. so no one will step in a hole and sprain an ankle.
At the time, discipline isn’t much fun. It always feels Help each other out. And run for it! Work at getting
like it’s going against the grain. Later, of course, it along with each other and with God. Otherwise you’ll
pays off handsomely, for it’s the well‐trained who never get so much as a glimpse of God. Make sure no
find themselves mature in their relationship with one gets left out of God’s generosity. Keep a sharp
God. Hebrews 12:7‐11 The Message eye out for weeds of bitter discontent. A thistle or
two gone to seed can ruin a whole garden in no time.
Thought for tomorrow: Step eleven isn’t just a nice Watch out for the Esau syndrome, trading away
thing to do so that we can feel good about ourselves; God’s lifelong gift in order to satisfy a short‐term
it’s training for the mission of a lifetime. How are appetite. You well know how Esau later regretted
you doing? that impulsive act and wanted God’s blessing – by
then it was too late, tears or no tears. Hebrews
November 27 12:12‐17 The Message

Scripture Reading for today: Joshua 5 and 6 Thought for tomorrow: Today might be one of those
days when God needs to send you a companion to
I love how The Message translation says, “Even help you see the reality of your current situation.
though the way goes through Death Valley…” (Psalm Tomorrow might be a day when God sends you to be
23) because it implies that once we get through it, a companion to someone else. One day we’re like
there’s another side! That’s good news. As we get David, another day like Nathan. Life is messy. It’s my
older, experience teaches us that darkness prayer for you today that no matter where you find
eventually turns to shades of grey and eventually we yourself in the midst of your grand epic adventure
re‐enter the world of light. David’s psalm is deeply with God that you will be sensitive to His speaking. I
personal. I read it and get beautiful images of David pray that you will run hard after Him.
and God, off by themselves, communing in delight
and contentment. David’s life with God was much November 28
messier than this psalm conveys without the context
of his entire life experience. One of the deepest, Scripture Reading for today: Joshua 7 and 8
darkest times in the life of David was after he had
committed the sin of adultery with Bathsheba. Boy, My husband grew up in a family that regularly
he didn’t sin half‐heartedly either! He was also went to worship, Bible studies, etc. I didn’t have as
responsible for the death of her husband—a life much experience in that area as he brought into our
crushed solely so that David could avoid marriage. I always thought that he would have the
acknowledging his sin. In 2 Samuel 12:1, we learn knowledge of God’s will, and I’d rely on him to get it
that David’s plan to escape detection failed woefully. straight and explain it to me. I didn’t believe that I’d
“But God was not at all pleased with what David had ever be able to learn enough to acquire a working
done, and sent Nathan to David…And here’s what knowledge of God’s will, much less acquire the
God. . . has to say to you: I made you king over Israel. power to carry it out. I was wrong. We can come to a
I freed you from the fist of Saul. I gave you your knowledge of the will of God; we can be given the
master’s daughter and other wives to have and to power to carry it out. God desires this for us—
hold. I gave you both Israel and Judah. And if that oftentimes more than we desire it for ourselves.
hadn’t been enough, I’d have gladly thrown in much It took many years for me to improve my
more. So why have you treated the word of God with conscious contact with God to the point where I
226
could set aside some of my false beliefs and “less Tomorrow we can ask the hard questions about
than” feelings. God absolutely wants us to know His where our belief will lead us!
will and He desires to empower us to carry it out.
Isn’t that incredible? November 30

Thought for today: …for it is God who works in you Scripture Reading for today: Joshua 11 and 12
to will and to act according to his good purpose.
Philippians 2:13 NIV “I don’t know why people even bother with this
Put into action God’s saving work in your lives, step. It’s a big waste of time; all this sitting around
obeying God with deep reverence and fear. For God praying and meditating is for the birds! The book of
is working in you, giving you the desire to obey him James got it right—faith without works is dead—and
and the power to do what pleases him. Philippians I’d rather be dead then spend all my time chanting
2:12b‐13 NLT when I know God wants me out doing His will.”
The gentleman who said this is not alone; taking
Thought for tomorrow: You can do this! time to improve our conscious contact takes time.
And sometimes it feels as if we’re being self‐
November 29 indulgent to hide away from the world, practicing
the principles taught in step eleven.
Scripture Reading for today: Joshua 9 and 10 Belief is not something that happens just between
our ears; it’s not passive. Knowledge informs our
I have spent many an hour asking for God’s will to action. If we believe in God, then we come to believe
be made known to me—meaning, in those days, that what God says. God says He has a plan and a
I desired for God to show me what he wanted me to purpose for us that involves doing. But it is His plan,
do. Recently I’ve come to appreciate that God tells His power and His resources that enable us to
me that my work is to believe in Him. Knowledge of accomplish His purposes. God’s word also says that
God’s will is not just about what I do, but perhaps He has the power and informs us of God’s intentions
more about who I “be”. This has led me to conclude to empower each of us. But make no mistake: it is
that God’s will is always for me to know Him. As I His mission that we are made aware of, and then we
seek to know Him daily, I’ve found that I am more face the decision about whether to join Him or not.
aware of God’s heart. When I’m more aware of He chooses the assignment. The awesome part of
God’s character —acquired through conscious this process is that we can know that ultimately,
contact—then it becomes more clear the kind of whatever God guides us toward, it will be far more
person he wants me to become. When I understand fulfilling than any plans we can think up on our own!
my true God‐created identity, it gets a lot easier to As much as I appreciate the gentlemen’s
figure out what God wants me to do in any and sentiment expressed above, I must respectfully
every situation. disagree. I think this step is not only valuable, it is
essential if we’re going to step as God speaks.
Thought for today: The work of God is this: believe in Suppose a soldier, committed to defending our
the one he has sent. John 6:29 NIV nation, sets out each morning to defend his country
without waiting to get his marching orders. How
Thought for tomorrow: When we feel confused, effective will he be? Sure, he’s dedicated. Definitely
powerless, and out of control, is it because we lack he’s devoted—willing to go to any lengths to protect
knowledge of God’s will? Is it because we believe we his nation for future generations. But how will he
can’t access His power to carry it out? Or is it decide the best course of action? We need to wait
because we sometimes chaff at what He desires for on our marching orders too and not run off each day
us? Instead of trying to figure it all out through the all “willy nilly” hoping we’ll hit the target today
paralysis of analysis, why not take this one simple simply because we’re sincere and committed.
verse and seek to apply it to our lives this week: The
work of God is this: believe in the one he has sent.
227
Thought for today: Show me your ways, o Lord, STEP 12 Having had a spiritual awakening as a
teach me your paths; guide me in your truth and result of these steps, we tried to carry this message
teach me, for you are God my Savior, and my hope is to others and to practice these principles in all our
in you all day long. Psalm 25:4‐5 NIV affairs.

Thought for tomorrow: Folks, we’re on the home December 1
stretch. Tomorrow we turn our attention to the
twelfth and final step of the 12‐step process. I want Scripture Reading for today: Joshua 13 and 14
to leave you with one more thought before we move
on. I did not have enough time this month to share I have a love/hate relationship with step twelve. I
with you all the awesome scriptures that speak so love the concept: we are spiritual beings, awakened
richly to this particular step. Many of them are from darkness into God’s glorious light. We have the
compiled in the step eleven section of our recovery grand privilege of carrying this message of hope to
workbook called Recovery—It’s a God Thing. I hope others who hurt and feel hopeless. The part I hate is
you’ll take some time and dig into the scriptures that sometimes this “carrying” is difficult,
found in that section of the workbook. The glorious inconvenient, tedious, and (rarely, but once in a
riches of what He has in store for us are just too while) dangerous. It usually involves taking a risk,
good to keep secret! Find more sacred (and and it never comes with a solid guarantee that we’ll
sometimes secret) truths from God’s word by going get the results we desperately desire.
to our Web site at www.northstarcommunity.com Sometimes carrying God’s message of hope
and accessing our step‐eleven study guide. requires me to visit bad neighborhoods, but usually
Blessings—and now, on to step twelve! it is no big deal. Once I was in one of those
neighborhoods and was chased by a man. I don’t
think he was following me so that he could
compliment me on my cool shoes or offer to do me a
favor. He was about the business of doing evil. He
failed to achieve his goal, but he scared me half to
death. While I was hot‐footing it to my car and
calculating the speed with which I could get in and
lock my doors, I was scared silly and was painfully
aware of how alone I was on that street.
David expresses his commitment to faith over fear
when he cries, “I will fear no evil, for you are with
me…” in Psalm 23. I wonder if this was a cry of calm
assurance. Is this a poetic utterance penned while
David lounged one day in a green pasture beside still
water? Filled to the brim with a restored soul, did
David wax eloquently about his confidence in the
presence of God and boldly claim His power over evil
as a servant of the King of Kings? I’ve been there and
done that. Often when I sneak away for an extended
break at the beach or in the mountains, my spirit
soars as I spend quality time with God, eat good
food, sleep whenever I’m in the mood, and play
hard. It’s easy to be a spiritual giant in the seclusion
of a good vacation with no responsibilities looming
on the horizon. It’s my prayer that each of us
regularly sets aside time for green pastures, quiet
waters, and soul restoration. I trust these times will
228
give us courage, vision, and a renewed strength to What if David wrote this psalm passionately? What
be exactly who God sees when He dreams about us. I if he yelled it out in an act of blind obedience while
suspect that on days like this, all of us cry out, “I’m he was in the midst of a hot pursuit—chased by evil?
with you, God! I am not afraid! I can do anything you What if he was desperately recalling truth in the
set before me! I can and will do your good, pleasing, midst of the adrenalin rush of fear that inevitably
and perfect will.” Perhaps this is exactly how David arises when one is under attack? Read this: “Saul
felt when he wrote this psalm, but perhaps not. sent men to David’s house to watch it and to kill him
in the morning. But Michal, David’s wife, warned
Thought for today: Be self‐controlled and alert. Your him, ‘If you don’t run for your life tonight, tomorrow
enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion you’ll be killed.’ So Michal let David down through a
looking for someone to devour. Resist him, standing window, and he fled and escaped.” 1 Samuel 19:11‐
firm in the faith, because you know that your 12 NIV Picture this: David shimmies down the side
brothers throughout the world are undergoing the of his house, drops to the ground, and runs for his
same kind of suffering. 1 Peter 5:8‐9 NIV life. He’s being chased by the order of the king! His
chance of escape is slim. David realizes this as he
Thought for tomorrow: I’ve always thought of David runs through fields; he recalls that he left all his
in a happy space writing this work. But after my weapons tossed carelessly beside the front door of
scare I came home and read this psalm a bit his house. He wishes he had eaten a more hearty
differently. Ask God to show you what He wants you evening meal, because he doesn’t know where his
to hear from His heart today. More on this topic in next nourishment will come from. The more he runs,
tomorrow’s devotional. the more he thinks. The more he thinks, the more he
fears.
December 2 Suppose he decides that his fear is getting to be
too big to deal with, and he begins to reel his racing
Scripture Reading for today: Joshua 15, 16, 17 thoughts back a bit. Suppose he says to himself,
“Whoa, Dave. You’re forgetting some really
In yesterday’s devotional, I told you a story about important truths here. Think man, think. You know
being chased by a guy in a bad neighborhood. The better than this.”
experience left me shaken and wondering if I had
missed something important as I studied the twenty‐ Thought for today: And thus he begins…The Lord is
third Psalm. Previously I assumed that David penned my shepherd (God has always been there for me; He
this poem while lounging around green meadows, still is.)
beside quiet waters. Now I wasn’t so sure. I began to I shall not be in want. (He provided when I was
wonder if David could have written this in the heat taking care of the sheep; He provided when I went
of passionate pursuit. David had a pretty interesting up against Goliath. He provided for me the last time
life—rich with danger and full of opportunities for Saul freaked out. He’ll provide now.)
fear. On several occasions David, a humble shepherd He makes me lie down in green pastures, He leads
boy, rescued his sheep from lions. In his job as me beside quiet waters. He restores my soul. (I’ve
shepherd, he killed the enemy with the instruments been in bad fixes before, and God has always
of every shepherd: his hands, a rod and staff, and a provided. I must trust in Him.)
slingshot. Once David killed a giant by the name of Even though I walk through the valley of the
Goliath, who had taunted grown men and caused shadow of death (which I am definitely doing right
them to run in fear. David became a friend of King this minute),
Saul, only to have Saul lose all his marbles and I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and
become jealous and paranoid of David. Numerous your staff, they comfort me. (Remembering these
times in the course of David’s life, his enemies truths, David’s heart rate begins to settle to a nice,
chased him hither and yon relentlessly. Later in life, manageable thump. His ability to think clearly
his own son turned against him. returns. He must keep running, because evil is in
229
pursuit, but he is no longer overcome. The epic Can you imagine that? God is so big, just the hem of
adventure has begun.) his robe fills the temple!
That same mystery is found in Isaiah’s encounter
Thought for tomorrow: I confess. I don’t know at with God. Clearly, it leaves him completely undone.
what point in David’s life he wrote this psalm. But As you have your quiet time today, please
what I do know, and what you know, is where we consciously acknowledge the presence of God. He’s
are in our own lives. I hope you’re in a happy space. with you when you desire His presence; He’s with
But if you’re not, then speak the truths of these you when you’d prefer for Him not to know what
words to God and see how the Good Shepherd leads you’re up to; He’s with you when you feel that you
you! Because, my friend, you’ve got places to go, are completely alone; He’s with you when you’re
people to meet, and words of hope and rejecting His overtures; and He’s with you when you
encouragement to share. Let’s get to it! face evil. Holy, sovereign, great, God—is with you.
How does that make you feel?
December 3
Thought for today: God has power to help and to
Scripture Reading for today: Joshua 18, 19, 20 overthrow. 2 Chronicles 25:8 NIV

For the last few devotionals, I’ve alluded to an Thought for tomorrow: As you spend time in prayer
incident where a man chased me down a deserted today, ask God what you’ve put your hope in (your
street. Here’s the rest of the story. Once I realized speed, automatic door locks, a reliable car). Take a
that I was being followed, I dashed for my car (which few minutes to compare that plan of salvation to the
would actually have been a very short distance if I one offered by God.
weren’t being chased) and I hit the button that
unlocks the doors. (Movie scenes where the December 4
frightened victim fumbles for the keys and drops
them or can’t get them in the keyhole raced through Scripture Reading for today: Joshua 21, 22, 23, and
my brain!) I love technology! The door unlocked, I 24
jumped in, and I jammed down on the “auto door
lock” feature. I rammed my key in the ignition, and The twelfth step is an invitation to live guided by
my would‐be assailant paused to prepare. As he faith instead of chased by fear. If we accept this
stood at the front of my car, I made a decision. He invitation, it helps to get God’s bigness firmly
was going to have to chase a moving target. I fired planted in our brain. Isaiah helps us do that, because
up the engine and he scrambled to get out of my He should know. No one seems to know exactly how
way. Shaken but safe, I headed for home. I felt safe this happened—a dream, a vision, whatever—but
because I was locked in my car and he was left Isaiah was given a glimpse of the Lord. So when
standing in the dust. David’s comfort was far more Isaiah shares with us the utter hugeness of God, we
substantial than mine. David was without fear need to listen!
because he understood the utter bigness of God. Isaiah asks a series of questions in chapter 40,
James McDonald, in his wonderful book, Gripped verse 12: “Who has measured the waters in the
by the Greatness of God, has helped me get more of hollow of his hand, or the breadth of his hand
a grip on the bigness of God. Using Isaiah’s close marked off the heavens? Who has held the dust of
encounter with our really big God, McDonald the earth in a basket, or weighed the mountains on
challenges us to get real about the holiness of God. the scales and the hills in a balance?”
In Isaiah 6:1, Isaiah says, “In the year of King Uzziah’s According to James McDonald in Gripped by the
death I saw the Lord sitting on a throne, lofty and Greatness of God, God needs a pretty big hand to
exalted, with the train of His robe filling the temple.” hold the water of planet earth. He reports that the
McDonald reminds us that the train of a robe palm of God’s hand must be capable of holding
communicates honor. God’s train filled the temple! 912,500 cubic miles of water. Think about it. That’s
912,500 miles high, 912,500 miles deep, and 912,500
230
miles wide—all sitting nicely in the palm of God’s iniquity is taken away and your sin is forgiven.’
hand. No wonder His robe is so gigantic! Isaiah 6:6‐7
Shaquille O’Neal has a pretty big hand. You notice When confronted with the bigness of God, we
its size if you ever see him grab a basketball and hold realize our smallness. When granted the mercy,
it like it was a grape. But Shaq’s hand is nothing grace, and forgiveness of God, we are comforted.
compared to the hand of God. God can span the
diameter of the earth from the tip of His thumb to Thought for today: Forget none of His benefits; who
the tip of His little finger—25,326 miles in diameter pardons all your iniquities…who redeems your life
(according to James McDonald). from the pit, who crowns you with loving kindness
So when you pray, “Lord, I’m placing this in your and compassion; who satisfies your years with good
hands,” or when you say to your friend, “I’ve just got things…” David speaking on the forgiveness of God
to put this in God’s hands and leave it there,” don’t in Psalm 103:2‐5
think you’re saying a small thing. Don’t shrug your
shoulders with a hint of doubt about the awesome Thought for tomorrow: If you’ve had a spiritual
capability of the one who can hold 912,500 cubic awakening, you know this stuff already in a
miles of water in His hand! profoundly personal way. I want to encourage you to
remember the days when you were more
Thought for today: The Lord is my light and my intimidated by God than intimate with Him. As you
salvation—whom shall I fear? The Lord is the share God’s message of hope, I pray that you will be
stronghold of my lif—of whom shall I be afraid? patient with those who are still running on empty.
Psalm 27:1 NIV Don’t give in to the temptation to make God smaller
in a misguided attempt to comfort. Isaiah was
Thought for tomorrow: As you pray, do so as one undone, and it was the best thing that ever
who knows that they are praying to a Great, Holy, happened to him.
Sovereign, Awesome God.
December 6
December 5
Scripture Reading for today: Galatians 4, 5 and
Scripture Reading for today: Galatians 1, 2, 3 review Matthew 1

Yesterday we commented on the “bigness” of God Yesterday it hit me: we’re on step twelve! What
and how that good news could comfort us when we can we expect when we’re finished with this study?
were counting on Him to rescue us. What if we feel Is the goal of the twelve‐step process to get us all
so small, “less than,” and unworthy that we fear the “perfected” so that we can then go out and set
greatness of God? Whether “big” is comforting or others straight? We’re almost finished with a year’s
terrifying depends upon one’s point of view, right? worth of devotionals focusing on the twelve‐step
Yesterday we learned that when Isaiah saw the model—a way of life intended to provide us with
vastness of God, he became undone. If all Isaiah saw principles that, when applied, lead to the abundant
of God was His bigness, he would have stayed life. And yet, in the midst of all this stepping, people
undone. Isaiah knew another thing about God: the I love who live by these principles find themselves
bigness of His heart. still struggling, sometimes suffering, and definitely
“ ‘Woe is me, for I am ruined! Because I am a man not perpetually perky. What’s up with that? Is that
of unclean lips, and I live among a people of unclean normal? Does that mean we didn’t do them “right?”
lips; for my eyes have seen the King, the LORD of What does the abundant life look like?
hosts.’ Then one of the seraphim flew to me with a In my opinion, situations like this are not only
burning coal in his hand, which he had taken from normal; they are opportunities. Practicing these
the altar with tongs. He touched my mouth with it principles in all our affairs means just that—all our
and said, ‘Behold, this has touched your lips; and you affairs. Some days these “affairs” involve pain,
wrongdoing (ours or others), and spiritual
231
conundrums. Maybe it’s just me, but I’ve been signifies His intent to prepare you for an excellent
practicing these principles in all my affairs for a long adventure. When God takes the time to prod us with
time, and I’m still in process. I abandoned the His rod—with His loving gaze focused solely on us—
expectation that the abundant life would include we are at that moment the object of His love and
perfection long ago. I suppose that’s why scripture affection. That’s definitely the abundant life!
is loaded with references to a shepherd’s tools of the
trade: the rod and the staff. December 7
First, let’s consider the rod. The rod was the power
weapon for a shepherd. Custom‐fit for his size and Scripture Reading for today: Philippians 1, 2, 3, 4
shape, the traditional rod was made from a young and review Matthew 2
sapling and carved with great care. The enlarged
base remained a rounded head of hard wood. In yesterday’s devotional we discussed the
Shepherds might use the rod to bash in the head of a shepherd’s rod and its value to the safety and
poisonous snake or to fend off a hungry lion. A welfare of the sheep. We considered how God
wayward sheep might even feel the nudge of the rod shows us how He uses His rod to assist us, and we
as a way to get his attention. The rod had another touched on how we use this same tool with our
use too. It was sometimes used to inspect the sheep, children. I am of the opinion that a parent should
pulling away the wool to expose the skin. Without never utilize the rod without a swift follow‐up with
this careful inspection, diseases could go the staff. So after my conversation with my son
undetected—ultimately endangering the entire when I utilized my parental “rod,” I whipped out my
flock. handy parental “staff.” Let me explain. If the rod
Recently I used my parental rod to poke and prod provides for the sheep through power, authority,
into the thought processes of my son. His lacrosse discipline, and defense, then the staff provides
team was struggling with some “off the field” protection through gentle encouragement and
concerns. It seemed necessary to whip out my rod. I comfort.
asked how he and his pals made their decision to Usually the staff is a long, slender stick with a hook
handle “the issue;” I hunted around in the recesses on one end. Even the shepherd is comforted by the
of his brain for motive; I forced him to think long and staff, as he uses it to lean on for support and
hard about his leadership responsibilities. It was a strength. Phillip Keller (author of A Shepherd Looks
hard, probing, and productive conversation. My son At Psalm 23) reports that one of the most beautiful
appeared to take no offense at this examination; I scenes in the life of a shepherd is when they pick up
think that’s because he trusts me. I really do think he newborn lambs with the staff to give the lamb to her
believes that I have his best interests at heart. I hope mother. If the shepherd touches the lamb, there is a
so; because I do! risk that the mother will reject the baby because of
the odor of the shepherd’s hand. Shy or timid sheep
Thought for today: “Search me, O God, and know my in need of inspection are often drawn to the
heart: try me, and know my thoughts: and see if shepherd by the staff. Most often, the shepherd
there be any wicked way in me, and lead me in the guides the sheep gently onto a new path, through a
way everlasting.” Psalm 139:23, 24 NIV treacherous route, or through a narrow gate with his
staff. A gentle pressure from the long, slender stick
Thought for tomorrow: As a Good Shepherd, God applied to the side of the sheep is usually enough to
doesn’t wake up every morning for the sole purpose get them on the right track.
of making us happy. He’s training us for a grand epic Keller illustrates this principle in his book: “Being
adventure (think step twelve). This training requires stubborn creatures sheep often get into the most
discipline (remember process not perfection). ridiculous and preposterous dilemmas. I have seen
Sometimes God finds it necessary to whip out His my own sheep, greedy for one more mouthful of
rod too. If we value God’s refining fire of presence, green grass, climb down steep cliffs where they
we find comfort under the rod of His discipline. May slipped and fell into the sea. Only my long
you enjoy God’s hand of discipline today, for it shepherd’s staff could lift them out of the water
232
back onto solid ground again. One winter day I spent frozen. You can’t move or speak. I watched in
several hours rescuing a ewe that had done this very horrified fascination as Michael dug deeply into the
thing several times before. Her stubbornness was bowl of rice. It was kind of sticky, and he tried to
her undoing” (p. 102‐103). muscle it out with both hands on the serving spoon.
Have you ever wondered why, in the midst of a As if in slow motion, I saw the spoon lift from the
situation, it seems as if you are snatched out of it for bowl, and the rice went flying—right onto our guest,
no apparent reason? I had a great friend who lost a and mainly into his shirt pocket. Does one laugh or
job she loved. She felt it was snatched out from cry at times like these? Calm as a cucumber, our
under her, but she realized a few months later that if guest continued to pass food. I don’t even
she had stayed in that job it would have been remember him giving the far‐flung rice a moment’s
detrimental to her well‐being. What seemed like notice. You gotta love a guest like that!
cruel fate turned out to be the staff of God. In our family lore, the rice incident represents an
attempt by both host and guest to show hospitality.
Thought for today: Faithful is he who is calling you Perhaps it went a little awry, but the intent was
[to himself] and utterly trustworthy, and He will also clear. In biblical times, it was an act of hospitality to
do it [fulfill His call by hallowing and keep you]. 1 anoint a guest’s head with oil. Today if you try it, you
Thessalonians 5:15 (Amplified version) might get in trouble! But back in the day, it would be
an act of disrespect not to anoint one’s guest.
Thought for tomorrow: It is my prayer that each of Anointing literally means to “make fat” or “richly
us will come to experience freedom from fear and an bathed”—all good things in those days. (Again, I do
abundance of comfort—even in the midst of fearful not recommend trying to fatten or bathe guests in
situations—because we appreciate the bigness, the modern‐day times! I am not sure if rice counts.)
mercy, and the presence of our Good Shepherd. Have you ever considered the fact that you live on a
Whether by rod or staff, may we recognize the hand planet on which you are a guest? You are invited by
of God in our lives, and trust its intentions for good, God Himself. Everything you experience in the way
not for evil. of provision is at the hands of the Good Shepherd—
the ultimate host with the most. Gravity,
December 8 temperature, water supply, oxygen levels, food—all
is provided for us in exactly the right levels so that
Scripture Reading for today: Colossians 1, 2, 3, 4 we can thrive.

If carrying a message of hope to others is a new Thought for today: So don’t be misled, my dear
experience for you, I’d like to offer a word of advice: brothers and sisters. Whatever is good and perfect
messages are best received when they are delivered comes down to us from God our Father, who created
in kindness, gentleness, and with a great deal of all the lights in the heavens. He never changes or
hospitality (as opposed to hostility). A number of casts a shifting shadow. He chose to give birth to us
years ago my daughter was dating the nicest young by giving us his true word. And we, out of all
man. One night he came and ate dinner with our creation, became his prized possession. James 1: 16‐
family. Perhaps this seemed like torture for him, but 18 NLT
we all liked him so much that it was a great treat for
us! Our youngest son was a little guy at that time, Thought for tomorrow: If God provides good gifts to
and he eagerly took the seat next to his new best us, consistently and faithfully, true to His word, and
friend. We made it through the blessing without we’re His prized possessions, then shouldn’t we give
incident, and then we politely passed the food generously to others, consistently and faithfully, true
around the table (the way you serve food when to God’s word? Let’s get to it!
guests are present). All seemed to go according to
plan until our youngest, eager to be a big guy, tried December 9
to serve himself. You’ve no doubt had a situation like
this: you see a disaster developing, and you’re
233
Scripture Reading for today: 1 Thessalonians 1, 2, 3, comes out of heaven. The gifts are rivers of light
and John 1 (review) cascading down from the Father of light. There is
nothing deceitful in God, nothing two‐faced, nothing
I have the grand privilege of visiting a local fickle. He brought us to life using the true Word,
treatment facility in our community on a regular showing us off as the crown of all his creatures.”
basis. I love that place! One of the reasons I enjoy James 1:16‐18 The Message
my visits is because of the hospitality. I am always
greeted warmly and with great enthusiasm. Thought for tomorrow: The twelfth step sets a
Sometimes I pop down there just for a cup of course for us: carry the message. But it is predicated
kindness. In a world that is sometimes harsh and upon this condition: having had a spiritual
unwelcoming, it’s nice to have a place to go where awakening. One indicator that we’re awake
people treat you like you’re special. spiritually is when we’re grateful for the privilege of
According to scripture, this kind of loving kindness carrying the message, no matter the circumstances
should be the hallmark of all our relationships. Is surrounding us. May it be so for us all!
that true for you? (For further insights, you might
check out our Insight quarterlies – “Finding Our Way December 10
Back to God Part I” and “Finding Our Way Back to
God Part II”.) Just yesterday I ran into my local gas Scripture Reading for today: 1 Thessalonians 4, 5
station for my daily cup of coffee. I was standing and Jude
patiently in line, waiting to buy my java and chat
with my friends behind the counter, when a lady What do you imagine a “spiritual awakening” is
came in and rammed me and several other patrons like? Do you think it comes wrapped in a perpetually
out of the way. She was rude, and she knew it. This perky package of goodwill toward all? What about
is not the first time I’ve experienced this, nor will it the phrase, “practicing these principles in all our
be the last. But the thing that really got to me was affairs.” What do you suppose that means? If we get
that she didn’t even care! She knew she was pushing this far in the twelve‐step process, does it follow
her way past three previously patiently waiting that we no longer have to ask, “What would Jesus
customers, but by gosh, she felt she was entitled! do?” because we intuitively both know and do it?
She treated my buddies behind the counter like they
were her personal servants! She was demanding, Thought for today: “My cup brims with blessing…”
and with all her snazzy clothes and sporty car—quite Psalm 23
frankly, it made her look very unattractive.
The contrast between her belligerent behavior and Thought for tomorrow: I may not know the answer
the warm kindness of the guys in my favorite rehab to all those questions, but I believe that spiritually
facility is startling. This lady had a lot of stuff those awake people who are practicing these principles in
guys don’t have right now: she had wheels, she had all their affairs are people who can relate to Psalm
money, and she had really great clothes. But what 23, when David says, “My cup brims with blessing…”
my friends in treatment have far outweighs all that After all, we were once in darkness, and now we are
stuff; they have gratitude. They are grateful to have children of the light. Once we were lost, and now we
a warm place to stay while they heal. This gratitude are found. Once we were separated from God, and
just spills out of most of them and onto anyone who now we live in communion with Him. What a bunch
comes through the door. I have spent the better part of blessing! What else does it mean?
of my day marveling at how differently we can Is a blessing getting your way, getting what you
perceive our worlds. Depending on our viewpoint, “want,” sitting on a balcony at a beach, or running
life can be marvelous with little or miserable with on a trail through farmland at Virginia Tech? Is a
much. blessing browsing through a great music store and
then finding the perfect afternoon snack on The
Thought for today: “So, my dear friends, don’t get Corner at UVA? Is a blessing found in a good book, a
thrown off course. Every desirable and beneficial gift cup of hot chocolate, a cozy fire, and an over‐stuffed
234
chair? Is a blessing spending the weekend with great rummaged in a music store, got some yummy
friends and beating your husband at bridge? Is it yogurt, and continued on our way. Dinner out, a
kayaking? Is it that beautiful moment when your good movie, and a quick stop to buy something
children are all fully engaged in a conversation that sports related, and my boys headed off to Scott’s
has everyone in stitches? All these things I love; are apartment while I went to my hotel room for the
they my blessings? “My cup brims with blessing…” Is night.
a traumatic life event in childhood a blessing? Is The next morning, after a lovely quiet time and a
having your boyfriend break up with you—after long walk, I went to pick up the guys for breakfast,
finding a replacement—a blessing? Is an eating and got lost in my son’s apartment parking lot. I
disorder a blessing? Is having someone you love drove around and around and around, and couldn’t
suffer from the horrors of addiction a blessing? Is find his building. There are a lot of buildings in his
financial loss a blessing? Is chronic illness a blessing? complex, but don’t feel any sympathy for me; I had
I have completely lost my ability to label life events driven right up to that building countless times
in the “seen” world as “blessing” or “curse.” Some before with no problem. Isn’t that crazy? After
of my greatest hurts have turned out to be my all‐ twenty minutes of driving in circles, I stopped and
time greatest blessings. And although I enjoy sitting called, “Son, I can’t find your building. I know this
and running and browsing and snacking and reading sounds crazy, and it is, but I’m driving around like a
and great friends and winning and kayaking and mad woman. The grounds keepers are beginning to
laughing—and feel incredibly blessed to have these look at me suspiciously. Tell me how to find your
precious things in my life—I am not so sure that building.”
some of the things I’ve cursed in life aren’t also “Mom,” he said in that calm voice that adult
blessings. I think David is reminding us of this truth children use on their parents in times of deep
when he weaves us through green pastures, quiet distress, “I can see your car from my bedroom
waters, paths of righteousness, valleys of the window.” It’s true. I was stopped right in front of his
shadow of death, evil, comfort, dinner with our apartment. Isn’t that silly? I had gotten so frustrated
enemies, and the hospitality of head anointing. and agitated by not driving right up to the building
David believes. David believes that a plan in the that I kept missing the fact that there were two sets
unseen world often leads to strange and mysterious of numbers on the place, and I was seeing the first
twists and turns in the “seen” world. May God give set and my eyes skipped right over the second set of
you a delight in the roller‐coaster ride of life; may He numbers—to his apartment.
equip you with “God‐vision goggles” so that you
have a vision for more than what can merely be Thought for today: “For I know the plans I have for
seen. May He give you peace in the process and the you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and
courage and stamina necessary to be the Prince or not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a
Princess Warrior that He has created you to become, future.” Jeremiah 29:11 NIV
so that you can carry that message of hope! “You will seek me and find me when you seek me
with all your heart. I will be found by you,”{ declares
December 11 the lord, “and will bring you back from captivity”
Jeremiah 29:13‐14 NIV
Scripture Reading for today: 2 Thessalonians 1, 2, 3
Thought for tomorrow: Although you may feel
I love the mountains and adore my children. So pretty superior and smug right now, knowing this
once in awhile when I need a break, I combine two will never happen to you, I want you to stop and
of my favorite things and head out west to think. I suspect it happens to all of us. I think we
Blacksburg, VA to visit my son. During one of my spend a lot of our days driving around and around
youngest son’s days off from school, we piled into and around, wondering where to find our grand epic
the car for a road trip. Michael and I stopped in adventure and how to carry God’s message of hope.
Charlottesville and enjoyed lunch at The Corner (a We get confused and disoriented; we doubt and
favorite haunt for University of Virginia grads). We despair of ever finding our place in God’s story.
235
Because we don’t have a place? No. As a result of eventually, if she wants to heal, she’s going to have
our history of “less than” living? No. I think it’s to accept this good news for herself. I don’t know
because our eyes keep skipping right over the where you are in your grand epic adventure, but if
obvious: the fact that each day provides you can relate to my friend, I want you to know that
opportunities for us to live large. Step twelve restoration awaits you. I’m praying that you will go
reminds us that God has plans for us, so be alert! to any lengths to find your way back to God.

December 12 December 13

Scripture Reading for today: 1 Timothy 1, 2, 3 Scripture Reading for today: 1 Timothy 4, 5, 6

“Teresa, I’m really aggravated with you!” I sometimes read the last chapter in a book first.
“Tell me more.” And if you are reading about the twelfth step
“Well, you keep talking about “carrying this without having walked through the first eleven,
message to others” and it really upsets me. I don’t you’re in the same boat! My husband thinks this is a
have a message worth sharing.” ridiculous way to read, but I disagree. Sometimes
Hurting people express sentiments like this on a reading the last chapter first gives us a vision for
regular basis. Perhaps you can relate. This particular where we’re headed. So go ahead, keep reading.
friend is early in the healing process and currently is The story goes like this: Once we were lost, now
living in the valley of the shadow of death. I we are found. All that is good, but that’s not the
empathize with her perspective, but my experience entire story. There’s more. This praising and glorious
teaches me that someday, having gone through this life—this God who is in the business of working his
valley, she will find her way back to God—and it will purpose out in everything and everyone—is waiting
be awesome! for you. You are on your way to becoming a vessel of
Finding our way back to God ultimately leads to hope. I suggest this not because I know where you
finding our way back to our true selves. It’s a are in your journey, but because I know God’s
glorious, sacred, and sometimes secret truth. intentions towards you; this is your destiny.

Thought for today: It’s in Christ that we find out who Thought for today: Hear, for I will speak excellent
we are and what we are living for. Long before we and princely things; and the opening of my lips shall
first heard of Christ and got our hopes up, he had his be for right things. For my mouth shall utter truth,
eye on us, had designs on us for glorious living, part and wrongdoing is detestable and loathsome to my
of the overall purpose he is working out in everything lips. All the words of my mouth are righteous
and everyone. It’s in Christ that you, once you heard (upright and in right standing with God; one whose
the truth and believed it (this Message of your aim is true); there is nothing contrary to truth or
salvation), found yourselves home free – signed, crooked in them. Proverbs 8:6‐8
sealed, and delivered by the Holy Spirit. This signet
from God is the first installment on what’s coming, a Thought for tomorrow: I know. You are thinking of
reminder that we’ll get everything God has planned the little white lie you told. You’re fretting because
for us, a praising and glorious life. Ephesians 1:11‐14 your “aim” was off as you parented your kid this
NIV week. You can’t remember the last time you uttered
an “excellent and princely” word, but you can
Thought for tomorrow: My friend is agitated in large remember giving the mechanic an earful when he
part because she doesn’t see her true self when she gave you the bad news about your transmission. I
gazes into the mirror. She’s lost her place in the know all this. But I’m the gal who reads the end of
story. It seems too good to be true that God might the book first; these other grand epic
have plans to bless her, to prosper her, to give her Princely/Princess things are true of you, too. Go get
both hope and a future. But it is true. For now, her ‘em! (Now is an excellent time to revisit the previous
community will carry her hope on her behalf. But
236
steps if you need guidance in finding your big December 15
dream.)
Scripture Reading for today: Titus 1, 2, 3
December 14
Yesterday’s devotional spoke of my spiritual
Scripture Reading for today: 2 Timothy 1, 2, 3, 4 awakening; today I want to talk about what I learned
as a barreled out of my cave of hibernation. I
Twenty or so years ago I had an awakening – but decided that if I was going to quit all the false
not the kind anyone would really want to identities I had assumed in my life (perfect student,
experience. It was more like waking up from a perfect child, perfect friend, perfect wife, perfect
terrible nightmare. I had known for a while that I mother, perfect whatever—all of which was false by
was a people pleaser, and I understood what a the way), I had better look for my true identity.
burden it was to try to please all the people all the As a child of God (which I was because I did believe
time. I had a vague notion that this probably wasn’t in the one He had sent), I began an investigation into
as virtuous as it sounded, but still, being a martyr what that entailed. I learned that I was one who
had a certain ring to the title. could speak of excellent and princely things not
One night sitting in a class (that I was taking to because I was studious and smart, but because I was
make me a better people pleaser), I awoke. I realized royalty—the kid of the King. I realized that I could
that wanting to please people was the same thing as speak truth, not because I knew it, but because the
not giving a hoot about pleasing God. That was Holy Spirit would lead me into it. I realized that I
definitely bad (since I claimed to be a follower of could do all things through Christ who strengthens
Him). I also acknowledged for the first time that me, not because I was strong, but because it is God
even my people‐pleasing pursuits had more to do who makes us both willing and able. I learned that
with me trying to feel better about myself than wrongdoing was detestable and loathsome to me,
making another person happy. That’s yucky stuff. not because I felt repentant, but because God said
one day I would see things more clearly. I discovered
Thought for today: How great is the love the Father that all my words were upright and that I could live
has lavished on us, that we should be called children in right standing with God, not because I knew how
of God! And that is what we are! The reason the to do this, but because God said He would do it
world does not know us is that it did not know him. through me. I learned my aim—previously very, very
1 John 3:1‐2 NIV off—could be true. I had no evidence of these
things—only God’s word pointing the way. This was
Thought for tomorrow: I was seriously bummed out my potential. It was going to require faith (only faith
when I realized that all my exhausting attempts to the size of a mustard seed) to live out this potential,
make other people happy were really manipulative but so be it! Next, it seemed logical to try to practice
ways of relating to satisfy my own cravings for these principles in all my affairs.
acceptance. And let me tell you: it really wasn’t
working out all that well. I had discovered that even Thought for today: As we know Jesus better, his
my best efforts were failing. I was not God; I did not divine power gives us everything we need for living a
have the power to save. But here’s what I did godly life. He has called us to receive his own glory
have—a new title—“child of God.” On that cold and goodness! 2 Peter 1:3
January night, sitting in a rickety folding chair,
listening to a teacher try to teach me how to be a Thought for tomorrow: Spiritual awakenings require
better person, I quit. I quit trying to be “good” and a lot of practice but never demand perfection. We’re
decided to try to figure out what it meant to be a kid going to fall down, but God will lift us up. When we
of the King. More on that tomorrow, but for today, notice that our performance isn’t matching our
remember: sometimes a spiritual awakening feels potential, we need to encourage each other and
initially like a living nightmare. remind ourselves that this is practice. We can do

237
this—not because we’re capable, but because God is devotional focused on the twelve steps; I’m talking
willing and able! about living these principles—practicing them in all
our affairs.
December 16 It isn’t the steps that change us; it is God. But
these steps are a way to learn how to talk, listen,
Scripture Reading for today: 1 John 1, 2, 3 and Isaiah and respond to God. It’s possible to acquire
9 knowledge but lack the relationship with God
necessary to put the knowledge to good use. If you
“God will always look for someone who has a have some vague feeling of sleepiness, a general
perfect heart toward Him, not necessarily someone awareness of spiritual dullness, or a sensation of
who has a perfect performance before Him. When sleep walking through life, then test out the theory
the Lord has the heart, He can always change the that you may have knowledge without experience.
behavior.” Joyce Meyer, Me and My Big Mouth, p. That’s a frustrating place to be. Trust me; I’ve been
141. there. It’s okay to know this about ourselves, but it’s
not okay to ignore this warning sign.
Thought for today: At one time we too were foolish, If this step sounds too good to be true, it’s not; it
disobedient, deceived and enslaved by all kinds of can be true for each of us. But if we’re not trying to
passions and pleasures. We lived in malice and envy, carry, if we’re not practicing these principles, then
being hated and hating one another. But when the there’s a good chance we’re having trouble staying
kindness and love of God our Savior appeared, he awake spiritually.
saved us, not because of righteous things we had
done, but because of his mercy. He saved us through Thought for today: He gave them their request; but
the washing of rebirth and renewal by the Holy Spirit, sent leanness into their soul. Psalm 106:15
whom he poured out on us generously through Jesus
Christ our Savior, so that, having been justified by his Thought for tomorrow: Spiritual restlessness can
grace, we might become heirs having the hope of mean that God is preparing to move us in some way.
eternal life. Titus 3:3‐7 NIV Perhaps we’re going to learn something about Him,
discover something untapped within ourselves, and
Thought for tomorrow: If you only have time to do be sent on a new grand epic adventure—all good
one thing today, do this one thing: Believe in the one stuff. But spiritual restlessness can also be a warning
He has sent. Then, do the next right thing. I ask sign much like those pesky lights on the dashboard
myself this question as I go through the day, “If all of our cars. The lights are annoying, but if we let
that God says is true, what’s my next right step?” them blink unheeded, a slight annoyance can grow
The day pretty much takes care of itself after that. into an expensive problem. Another question I like
to ask myself (although I sometimes don’t like the
December 17 answer I receive back), “Am I practicing these
principles in all my affairs, or am I merely going
Scripture Reading for today: 1 John 4, 5 and 2 John through the motions?”

I went to visit a new mother and she asked me this December 18
question, “Why didn’t you tell me it would be like
this?” Well, some experiences are simply Scripture Reading for today: Isaiah 11, 12, and 35
indescribable.
That’s why I hesitate to tell people that using the My parents have a dear friend who recently lost a
twelve steps as a tool to draw near to God will spouse after a protracted illness. Often my mom will
dramatically change their lives. It’s hard to describe mention that she took over some bread, had her
it and best if it’s experienced. I’m not referring to friend over for dinner, or took her to lunch at one of
reading the twelve steps, listening to teachings their favorite spots in Atlanta. My mom is loving her
about the twelve steps, or even reading a daily
238
friend as best she knows how during this difficult could tell who would turn out to be a great
time of loss. missionary.
What my mom can’t do is share her experience, “The great missionaries are always the ones that
strength, and hope in a personal way that relates to are already effectively carrying God’s message of
losing a spouse, since my mom has never hope to others before we send them off to a foreign
experienced that particular kind of loss. Of course, land.”
my mother understands this principle. I love how she “Really. So what you’re saying is, if they aren’t
does what she can, and her friend is deeply having spiritual conversations that are fruitful in the
appreciative. community they currently live in, they’re probably
Sometimes my mom gets a little frustrated that not going to increase their ability to share by
she can’t personally relate to her friend’s grief and changing their geography?”
she wonders if she’s being helpful to her buddy. She “Yep.”
raises a great point. In recovery, when we hear Hmmm…that sounds very recovery‐esque! Those
“carry the message,” it’s often described as “sharing geographical “cures” rarely work out!
one’s experience, strength, and hope.” Carrying the One Sunday morning I was approached by a
message is deeply personal; it is experiential; it gentleman who told me God had called him to
cannot be refuted or denied. Others can legitimately deliver the morning message at our church. I’d never
say that they cannot relate to a particular experience seen this fellow before, so I asked him if this was his
shared. But each of us has a life story, and no one first time visiting our community and he replied,
can take that away from us. “Oh, yes. I go to another church, but the people’s
hearts are hardened, and they won’t listen to my
Thought for today: A word fitly spoken and in due message, so I thought I’d come here and deliver it
season is like apples of gold in settings of silver. today.” He left, quite annoyed when I explained that
Proverbs 25:11 NIV I’d have to get to know him a little better before he
could have my job!
Thought for tomorrow: If you’ve ever wondered
how God might use you to spread His message of Thought for today: Praise be to the God and Father
hope, consider how you’ve suffered. Oftentimes that of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion
provides us with what we need to encourage and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all
another. Even if we can’t relate directly to another our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any
person’s particular kind of pain, our past experiences trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received
with our own hard times can guide us and equip us from God. 2 Corinthians 1:3‐4 NIV
for ministering to others. My favorite word in this
step is “tried.” That’s all we’re called to do. The Thought for tomorrow: How do we decide whom to
results are not up to us. Isn’t that awesome? share our message of hope with? Who are these
“others” that step twelve mentions? I believe they
December 19 are people that God brings into our lives. Together
we discuss our experiences and hopefully our
Scripture Reading for today: Isaiah 40, 41, 43 solutions. I think the better we know each other, the
richer and more meaningful our message‐sharing
Years ago we had friends who worked as becomes. The missionary consultant made sure that
consultants for a large missionary organization. Their a candidate had something to share before shipping
job was to screen potential candidates and place him or her off to another culture. I felt a little
them in the area of mission work that would best nervous about a stranger wanting to share his
suit their unique gifts and talents. I found this experiences when the folks that knew him best
process fascinating, and I was always asking my didn’t think that was wise. If you’re wondering who
friend about his work. I never will forget the to share your experience, strength, and hope with,
conversation that erupted after I asked him if he you can relax. This is a God thing. As you live in
239
community, God will open the doors for you to from whom men hide their faces he was despised,
share. and we esteemed him not. Isaiah 53:1‐3

December 20 Thought for tomorrow: With all the feasting that
this holy season brings, the mangers, the Christmas
Scripture Reading for today: Isaiah 46, 53, 54 Eve Services, the caroling, the special candles—much
of it centered on the birth of Christ—let’s not forget
Five days before the holiday season. Who has time that he was also a man of sorrows, familiar with
to read a daily devotional? Take a few minutes and suffering. I trust that part of your spiritual awakening
read the passages in Isaiah. Notice how years and involves a growing awareness that all that glitters is
years and years before Christ was physically born to not gold. No one has the “perfect” Norman Rockwell
Mary, God had a plan. He knew what was coming. family. My prayer is that you will use your tools to
This principle is true in our lives too. approach this holiday season without expectations
and dreams of fantasy families. I’m asking God to
Thought for today: Jesus said, “Go home to your remind each of us that the baby in the manger looks
family and tell them how much the Lord has done for cute with a couple thousand years to edit the
you, and how he has had mercy on you.” Mark 5:19 experience, throw some tinsel on it, and turn it into
NIV a Hollywood production. Brush past the trappings in
your life, and look for the real deal. You will find it as
Thought for tomorrow: The fortunate among us will you carry your message and practice the principles
be spending a portion of this holy season with our you’ve been learning!
family members. Even if we can’t share a feast, we
can make our phone services happy by calling home. December 22
My prayer is that conversations will be sprinkled
with the light of God’s love—as expressed in our Scripture Reading for today: Jonah 1, 2, 3, 4
conversations about what the Lord has done for us.
Now, go wrap those gifts! I was in the fifth grade the first year I tried to find
where Santa stashed the goodies. My brothers and I
December 21 had it all figured out. No way could Santa make it to
every single house in one night—unless (and here’s
Scripture Reading for today: Isaiah 55, 61, 66 where it got exciting) he came around in advance,
dropped of the loot, and then showed up on
Again, let me encourage you to ditch whatever I Christmas Eve simply to arrange all our goodies
have to say, and read Isaiah. Pay close attention to under the tree. If this were true, we might just be
what the prophet has to say about the future. Does able to find some of our presents hidden in
anything in this message surprise you? preparation for his arrival.
We scoured our house from top to bottom, to no
Thought for today: “If you remain in me and my avail. We even crawled under the tarp covering my
words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it dad’s boat, hoping to find a Barbie play house and
will be given you. This is to my Father’s glory, that some GI Joes hanging out, waiting to meet us. Alas,
you bear much fruit, showing yourselves to be my my mother has really sharp ears. “What are you kids
disciples.” John 15:7‐8 NIV doing down there? You’re too quiet!” (Doesn’t that
Who has believed our message and to whom has sound like an experienced mother of four?)
the arm of the Lord been revealed? He grew up At that moment, I was holding my brother by the
before him like a tender shoot, and like a root out of ankles while he peered into the dark of the innards
dry ground. He had no beauty or majesty to attract of the boat. Not wanting to get caught with my
us to him, nothing in his appearance that we should hands in the cookie jar, I let go and let God save him.
desire him. He was despised and rejected by men, a Down he fell into the boat.
man of sorrows, and familiar with suffering. Like one
240
Thought for today: How, then, can they call on the
one they have not believed in? And how can they Thought for today: Whenever anyone turns to the
believe in the one of whom they have not heard? And Lord, the veil is taken away. Now the Lord is the
how can they hear without someone preaching to Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is
them? And how can they preach unless they are freedom. And we, who with unveiled faces all reflect
sent? As it is written, “How beautiful are the feet of the Lord’s glory, are being transformed into his
those who bring good news.” But not all the likeness with ever‐increasing glory, which comes
Israelites accepted the good news. For Isaiah says, from the Lord, who is the Spirit. 2 Corinthians 3:16‐
“Lord, who has believed our message? Consequently, 18 NIV
faith comes from hearing the message, and the
message is heard through the word of Christ. Thought for tomorrow: Two days before Christmas:
Romans 10:14‐17 NIV have you finished shopping, baking, wrapping, and
decorating? I hope I will finish all my fun holiday
Thought for tomorrow: When the coast was clear, I festivities without pulling out all my hair! But more
went back and retrieved my brother from the than that, I pray that we will find time to be a Ruth
bowels of that smelly boat. Read Jonah. Let’s to someone who needs us during this season of
remember that whether we’ve run from God or feel celebration. Sure, the world’s in a pickle; trouble
unceremoniously dumped by God (or others who lurks on all sides. What’s new? What could be new
were supposed to hold us), there is good news. He would be for each of us to live out our God‐created
has never forsaken us. For those of us who have identity on our little plot of this big, old planet. We
been given the gift of a spiritual awakening, let’s be might not succeed at achieving world peace, but we
alert to those around us, who are still hiding out in can be instruments of His peace in our community.
smelly boats or a whale’s belly. They could use some We might not be able to solve the problems of
good news. homelessness, poverty, and starvation, but we can
do some little something for the people in need in
December 23 our neighborhood. It’s easy to sit around and talk
about what’s wrong with our world and pontificate
Scripture Reading for today: Ruth, 1, 2, 3, 4 on how we are going to fix it. There’s a place for that
kind of thing. But on most days, it’s probably best if
This has been a year of opportunity for me. On we just stick to making our homes, families, friends,
several occasions I’ve had the privilege of hearing and our little spheres of influence better simply
some really wonderful, intelligent, savvy, and godly because we’re present – the ultimate holiday gift!
men speak about the condition of our culture today,
specifically with regard to children, adolescents, December 24
family, and our nation. As is true throughout history,
our present state poses some challenges that we Scripture Reading for today: Luke 1, 2
must overcome if we’re going to improve the
outlook for future generations. It’s Christmas Eve! Read the Christmas story and
The book of Ruth (our scripture reading for today) enjoy! Find a place to worship, get up off the couch,
speaks of a period of religious and moral and go! Speak to the people sitting around you; they
degeneracy, national disunity, and foreign may be lonely. And if perchance you’re the lonely
oppression. I suppose that the Israelites worried one, you won’t be after you worship in the midst of
about their grandchildren, much as we do today. community.
Embedded in this troubling time is the story of a
young widow, Ruth—a woman who was selflessly Thought for today: And unto us a child is born…
devoted to her mother‐in‐law, Naomi. This kindness
is rewarded by a man named Boaz, who rekindles Thought for tomorrow: May the practicing of your
love, hope, and security for these two desperate principles result in blessing to all those you meet.
women.
241
December 25 Anyone drink too much at a family gathering and
insult a guest or a sibling?
Scripture Reading for today: Luke 3, 4 How well did you eat? I’m not referring to how
much; I’m talking about how well? Did you pig out
Today is the day we traditionally celebrate the on stuffing and sweet potatoes, pecan pie, and
birth of Christ, and our family has a lot of traditional coconut cake?
ways to rejoice. It involves lots of food, fun, gift Have you started to think about how big your
giving, and eventually, napping. But we’re adding a charge card bill will be when you open it in January?
new thing this year; we’re going to listen to Andrew Are you beginning to bargain? Are you promising
Peterson’s CD: Behold the Lamb of God, the true tall yourself next year will be different? More
tale of the coming of Christ. If you don’t have a copy, controlled? Fewer regrets?
you’ll want to rectify that shortcoming. I’m sure you
can find it on his Web site at www.andrew‐ Thought for today: “My purpose will stand, and I will
peterson.com. do all that I please.” Isaiah 46:9‐11
Anyway, in case you don’t have it, here are the
words to Peterson’s song, While Shepherds Watched Thought for tomorrow: I hear people say all the time
Their Flocks. (See Luke 2:8‐15; the CD says, that they’re done with making resolutions; no more
“Traditional—music and additional words by Andrew for them! What I suspect they mean is that they’ve
Peterson). Enjoy, and may you and yours have a lost hope of finding solutions to their problems. Past
blessed day! performance demonstrates that nothing will ever
While shepherds watched their flocks by night change, so they stop trying. I want you to know that
All seated on the ground simply because you haven’t found a solution in the
The angel of the Lord came down, and glory shone past does not mean there isn’t one. If you have some
around area in your life that you know is incongruent with
“Fear not!” said he for mighty dread had seized God’s big dream for you, then I promise you: a
their troubled minds solution is available. God’s purposes stand. He
“Glad tidings of great joy I bring to you and all purposes and plans for you to have a good life and a
mankind grand epic adventure. If you’ve got something that’s
To you in David’s house this day is born of David’s holding you back, find someone who once had the
line same issue and ask them to share their experience,
The Savior who is Christ the Lord and this shall be strength, and hope. Then do the next right thing.
the sign
The heavenly babe you there shall find to human December 27
view displayed
All meanly wrapped in swaddling bands and in a Scripture Reading for today: Luke 8, 9, 10, 11
manger laid”
Hallelujah, Hallelujah, Hallelujah, Christ is born I want to say a dirty word…ready? Obedience.
Hallelujah, Hallelujah, Hallelujah, Christ is born Who likes to hear that? I hang out with people
“All glory be to God on high and to the earth be predisposed to saying “No!” when a “Yes” would
peace have served them better. For some reason, I’m
Good will henceforth from God to man attracted to people who like to color outside the
Begin and never cease” lines, break rules, and generally mess with authority
figures. I’m not saying this is good or godly, but it is
December 26 what it is.
My husband and I are taking dance classes –
Scripture Reading for today: Luke 5, 6, 7 occasionally he does more clowning than dancing. It
reminds me of a time, long long ago, when we were
Did you get everything you wanted for Christmas in high school. For an introvert, the guy certainly
this year? Are you satisfied, yet? could distract a teacher with his antics. One of our
242
favorite stories about Mr. Introvert happened soon I hope you’re setting aside some time to inventory
after he arrived at our school as a transfer from this past year. In fact, take some time today and
Maine. We had a cool math teacher that we loved, reflect back on the ways God showed you
and Pete was in a small computer class. Filled with compassion this year.
guys, this small group was known to push the
envelope and enjoyed bantering with their teacher. Thought for today: Jesus went through all the towns
One day Mr. Crane had enough. “The next person and villages, teaching in their synagogues, preaching
that curses in this room gets a demerit!” the good news of the kingdom and healing every
“Why the h e double hockey sticks (that’s not how disease and sickness. When he saw the crowds, he
he said it, but I have a nephew who reads this had compassion on them, because they were
devotional) do you want to do that?” answered my harassed and helpless, like sheep without a
future husband. Pete had some explaining to do shepherd. Then he said to his disciples, “The harvest
when that demerit notice showed up in the mail. (To is plentiful but the workers are few. Ask the Lord of
fully appreciate this story, you have to know that the harvest, therefore, to send out workers into his
this man never ever curses, and often chides the rest harvest field.” Matthew 9:35‐38 NIV
of us for what he perceives to be “loose lips.”)
I suppose that’s why he couldn’t say but so much Thought for tomorrow: If your time of reflection
when our son brought home a note on his report yields a healthy list of God’s compassionate giving to
card that said, “Could you please talk to Michael you, then let me ask you one other question: how
about not distracting me in class? He gets me might you take those gifts and use them to equip
laughing and this gets the entire class off track!” The you to become one of the workers Jesus has asked
apple doesn’t fall far from the tree! us to pray for? I ask because obviously Jesus saw a
Pete and I put on our serious parental unit faces need for workers. I fear that our failure to practice
and spoke to Michael about the need to behave in certain principles in all our affairs has limited the
class. It was hard, but we did it. Afterwards, I work force.
realized that it shouldn’t have been hard to tell our “As you go, preach this message: ‘The kingdom of
son this important truth. heaven is near.’ Heal the sick, raise the dead,
Obedience may sound like a dirty word to those cleanse those who have leprosy, drive out demons.
predisposed to wanting our own way, but it isn’t. It’s Freely you have received, freely give.” Matthew 10:7‐
a beautiful word. The discipline of obedience brings 8 NIV
with it all sorts of blessings. Disobedience may get us
a few chuckles, but it probably won’t build character. December 29
Upon reflection, I’m glad we spoke to our son about
the need to obey. Obedience isn’t something we do Scripture Reading for today: Luke 16, 17, 18
to avoid punishment; it’s a skill set we develop so
that we might become people of character. It was a conversation I didn’t think I had time to
get into. I was standing in a long line waiting for a flu
Thought for today: To obey is better than sacrifice… shot, and the guy behind me wanted to chat. I got
the impression he didn’t get out much. He
Thought for tomorrow: The holidays are wrapping recognized my face from the television show that
up, and a new year filled with potential beckons. Is NorthStar Community produces, and he seemed
there anything related to “obedience” that you’ve intent on giving me a hard time. Oh well. It was a
been resisting? Is it holding you back from bigger long line. I decided to relax.
and better things? “And another thing you do that really bugs me is
the way you talk about community.”
December 28 “Yeah? Tell me more.”
“Well, you know, you make it sound like if we
Scripture Reading for today: Luke 12, 13, 14, 15 don’t have a community of people that we hang
with, we’re missing out. Listen, little lady, I used to
243
go to church. What a bunch of hypocrites! I suppose December 30
you’re going to tell me that your place is different.”
“No, I can’t say that it is. We’re messy as can be. Scripture Reading for today: Luke 19, 20, 21
Just this week I heard yet another story of how one
person in our community got their feelings hurt by I’m preparing for a dinner party and in a few
someone else. Now, these two people aren’t minutes I’ll be polishing silver and getting out the
speaking. It’s a terrible mess.” good china. I particularly love my china because it
That slowed him down. “Yeah, well, you’re was my grandmother’s. My mother has the same
probably going to do something about that, aren’t pattern. Pulling it out reminds me of holidays long
you? That’s what you minister types do—meddle. past, when others used these same dishes to serve
You’ll make everybody kiss and make up, right?” me—when I didn’t have a clue about how much
I laughed. “Are you kidding me? I thought you said work went into setting a beautiful table and cooking
you watched our show every week.” a plethora of delicious homemade concoctions.
“I do. There’s nothing else any better on, so I just My guys don’t really care for the “good stuff;” they
stick it out until football comes on.” think the glasses don’t hold enough milk. They don’t
“Well, surely you can tell from our crowd that like how I yell and scream when they heat leftovers
they’re a bunch of independent thinkers. I wouldn’t on the good china and cause fireworks in the
dare try to get in the middle of a good brawl. I’m microwave.
getting too old for that sort of thing.”
“Hmmph. I bet you’ll send some deacon over there Thought for today: In a wealthy home some utensils
to fuss at them, and if they don’t straighten up, are made of gold and silver, and some are made of
you’ll kick them out of the church, right?” wood and clay. The expensive utensils are used for
Wow. I had no idea I was going to enjoy this so special occasions, and the cheap ones are for
much! “Ha. You’re too funny! If we kicked out everyday use. If you keep yourself pure, you will be a
everybody who acted badly in our community, none utensil God can use for his purpose. You life will be
of us would show up on Saturday nights and Sunday clean, and you will be ready for the master to use
mornings. Frankly, this is such a big problem that I you for every good work. 2 Timothy 2:20‐21 NIV
don’t know what to do about it.”
“Well, you certainly sound like you know what to Thought for tomorrow: Once upon a time, I believed
do on that show of yours.” that a valuable person was one whom God made
“Oh. You can’t believe everything you hear on TV. into an expensive utensil. You know, fancy. The kind
Our television producer must do more editing than I of person you might rub elbows with on special
thought.” I felt a little disappointed when I had to occasions. My boys have provided me with a
ditch this conversation for an appointment with a different perspective. They love the reliable glasses
needle. and dishes we use every day. Nothing fancy, but
they’re clean and serviceable. They hold plenty of
Thought for today: We ask you—urge is more like milk and they never require the use of a fire
it—that you keep on doing what we told you to do to extinguisher when micro‐waved. Second Timothy
please God, not in a dogged religious plod, but in a doesn’t quantify the value of fancy and plain, it just
living, spirited dance. God wants you to live a pure says a pure utensil is one that God can use. It isn’t
life. 1 Thessalonians 4:1‐3 The Message about how much you sparkle. Oh, I love my good
china. But the thing that serves my family best is the
Thought for tomorrow: While you’re making that everyday dishes. Morning, noon, and night they
list of New Year’s resolutions don’t forget that it isn’t sustain us. As you begin your new year, would you
about figuring out some way to be perfect; it’s so pray about allowing God to have His way with you?
much more about dancing with God, allowing Him to Would you become willing to be made willing to be a
lead you through the messes. If we get confused and plain but pure utensil—if it is God’s will for your life?
think a pure life equals a life with no boo boo’s,
we’re barking up the wrong tree.
244
December 31

Scripture Reading for today: Luke 22, 23, 24

Whew! Twelve steps in 365 days. I’d love to hear
from you about your experiences of faith this past
year. Email me at AskTeresa@hotmail.com and tell
me your stories. While I wait to hear from you, can I
pray for you and yours?
Lord, I realize that you want to be found by us!
How awesome to know that you love us. That your
eyes rove to and fro across the earth, looking for one
man fully devoted to you so that you might
strengthen him. Oh Father, we want to be that
person! We know of your generosity, and we trust
that no matter how many faithful you find—you will
have provision to strengthen all you see.
We know also that you are filled with compassion
when you look and find the workers scarce. You
never reign down upon us your condemnation.
Instead, you are patient with us. Even as we live in
bondage (some self‐imposed), you in your infinite
wisdom and mercy, make provision to set us free. We
are created to be free! Imagine that?
This freedom cannot be bought, bartered, or
begged for—only you can provide it for us. When we
meet the Spirit of the Lord and find our freedom, we
become a reflection of His glory. This is a process; the
transformation takes place in “every‐increasing
glory.” This glory is a bestowed glory, a reflection of
your glory, Lord, a truth so profound that it
eliminates any hint of arrogance or pride. It is a
humbling glory, but glory indeed—a shining that
draws others to us. We are ready to carry your
message of hope to hurting people. Lead us as you
see fit. Amen.
Stay tuned: Tomorrow’s devotional begins a
brand‐new adventure! Tune into
www.northstarcommunity.com for the next
devotional series!
245

Devotional 12 in 12

Uploaded by

Document Information

Original Description:

Copyright

Available Formats

Share this document

Share or Embed Document

Sharing Options

Did you find this document useful?

Is this content inappropriate?

Copyright:

Available Formats

Devotional 12 in 12

Uploaded by

Copyright:

Available Formats

Finding Our Way Back to God – a Daily Recovery Devotional

Sundays at 10:45 a.m. Bon Air Elementary School

Saturdays at 6:30 p.m. Bon Air Baptist Church

Watch us Sundays at 11:30 a.m.

Sundays 10:30 a.m. Walnut Grove in Mechanicsville

7046 Cold Harbor Road, Mechanicsville, Virginia

You might also like