A Sardar received an invitation, to a party

which said “Black Tie Only”!!

When he went to the party he was surprised to
find the other invitees wearing trousers and shirts
as well !!!!

Original
Humphty Dumphty sat on a wall,
Humphty Dumphty had a great fall,
All the kings’ horses, all the kings’ men
Couldn’t put Humphty Dumphty
together again
Punjabi Translation:
Baba Karnail Singh baitha si Dukaan te’
Baba Karnail Singh diggya dhadam se, Pind de log phir
aa ke kehan lagge,
Baba Karnail Singh te gaya hun kaam se.

Sardar at bar in New York.

Man on his right says “Johny Walker single”.
Man on his left says “Peter Scotch single”.
Sardar says - “Baljith Singh Married”

Once three sardars decided to go on a picnic.

When they got there, they realized they had forgotten the soda.
So, the youngest sardar said he would go home and get the soda if the others promised
not to eat the sandwiches until he got back.
An hour, a couple of hours, then all day went by.
Both sardars were now very hungry.
Finally one of the sardars said: “Oh, come on, he is not going to be back. Let’s eat the
sandwiches.”
Suddenly, the youngest sardar popped up from behind a rock and said: “If you do, I
wont go.”

Four sardars wanted to open an auto repair shop.

They bought the best car servicing equipment and soon inaugurated the repair shop.
They all waited eagerly on the inaugural day; but no customer arrived. A couple of
days passed, there were no cars that came in for repairs.
A week, then a month went by, there were no cars.
After all, how could cars come in, the sardars had put up their garage on the second
floor.
The leader says, “We are all here today to prove to the world that Saradars are not stupid.
Can I have a volunteer?”
A Saradar works his way through the crowd and steps up to the stage. The leader asks
him, “What is 15 plus 15?”
After 15 or 20 seconds he says, “Eighteen!” Obviously everyone is a little disappointed.
Then 80,000 Saradars start cheering, “Give him another chance! Give him another
chance!”
The leader says, “Well since we’ve gone to the trouble of getting 80,000 of you in one
place and we have the world-wide press and global broadcast media here, gee, uh, I guess
we can give him another chance.”
So he asks, “What is 5 plus 5?” After nearly 30 seconds he eventually says, “Ninety?”
The leader is quite perplexed, looks down and just lets out a dejected sigh — everyone is
disheartened - the Saradar starts crying and the 80,000 men begin to yell and wave their
hands shouting, “Give him another chance! Give him another chance!”
The leader, unsure whether or not he is doing more harm than damage, eventually says,
“Ok! Ok! Just one more chance– What is 2 plus 2?”
The man closes his eyes, and after a whole minute eventually says, “Four?”
Throughout the stadium pandemonium breaks out as all 80,000 Saradars jump to their
feet, wave their arms, stomp their feet and scream…
“Give him another chance! Give him another chance!”

Two Sardars looking at an Egyptian mummy.

Sardar1: Look so many bandages, pakka truck accident case!
Sardar2: Aaho, truck nambar bhi likha hai :BC-1760!!

Sardarji got the fourth child.

He fills data in the birth certificate.
“Mother: Sikh.
Father: Sikh.
Kid: Chinese.”
“How come you write “Chinese” when both parents are Sikh?”
” Aah, read a newspaper, it says that every 4th person born on the Earth now is a
Chinese.”

One day a bus gets an accident which were filled up with some sardarjis.
Then one of the Saradarji starts to cry very loudly saying I have lost my hand, I have lost
my hand…
After the accident one of the survived sardarji says to him, “why are you crying
control yourself, don’t cry, see that man has lost his head but he hasn’t utter even a
single word, how silent he is…”

‘Take me to the 10th floor,’ said Banta Singh as he entered the lift of a high rise bulding.
When the lift reached its destination, the liftman opened its gates and said, ‘The 10th
floor, beta.’
‘Why did you call me beta?’ demanded Banta Singh. ‘I am not your son.’
I called you beta because I brought you up,’ replied the liftman
Santa Singh : ‘Look Banta, what type of glasses they have made. The top is closed. How
can you fill lassi in it ?’
Banta Singh : ‘Yes, that’s funny. And even if you make a hole at the top, how will the
lassi stay in the glass when the bottom is open?’

A Sardar came to the office of The Hindustan Times to place an advertisement

announcing his father’s death.
“The rate is Rs. 360 per single col. cm,” the clerk told him.
“Main toh lut jaoonga,” exclaimed the Sardar.
“My father was 182 cms tall.”

Banta Singh was in court charged with parking his car in a restricted area.
The judge asked him if he had anything to say in his defence.
“They should not put up such misleading notices,” said Banta Singh.
It said, “Fine For Parking Here.”

While having a brain check up…

Doctor : I regret to tell you that you have a brain tumor.
Sardar : Yesss!!! (jumps in joy)
Doctor : Did you understand what I just told you?
Sardar : Yes of course, do you think I’m dumb?
Doctor : Then why are you so happy?
Sardar : Because that proves that I have a brain!

Sardar is napping on the lawns of cross-maidan, next to a donkey.

A passer-by asks him, “Sardarji, do you know what time it is?”
Sardar lifts a leg of the donkey and says, “5:00 pm”.
Another passer-by asks him for time. Sardar does the same thing again and tells him the
time.
All this while a curious person has been watching what is going on. He approaches the
Sardar and asks, “Arre, sardraji, kya bat hai, gadhe ki taang utha ke time bata sakte ho!”
Sardar coolly says, “Arre bhai, gadha beech mein soya hai, to woh rajabai tower ki
ghadi nahin dikhti, isliye uski taang uthani padti hai…”

Two Sardarjis were in conversation on the beach :

Sardarji 1: Praaji , Isse ‘beach’ kyo kaheete hai?
Sardarji 2: Tumhe nahi pata?
Sardarji 1: Nahi pata.
Sardarji 2: Woh to aasmaan aur zameen ke beech mein hai issliye issai beach kahete hai.

A bus fell into lake, everyone swimmed across to save their lives.
Suddenly Sardar jumps in searches for someone, when asked whom he seaching for.
Sardar said, “Sala conductor ne change nahi diya tha.”
Santa is driving down a road and sees a sign that says, “Watch for Fallen Rocks.”
A few kilometres later, he sees some rocks at the side of the road, so he stops and picks
them up.
When he gets to the next town, he carries the rocks into the Highway Maintenance
office and puts them on the counter.
“Here are your fallen rocks,” he says to the man behind the counter. “Now where is my
watch?”.

Banta called his friend Santa and told him that he recently met the woman of his
dreams. Now what should he do?
Santa said, “Send her some flowers and on the card invite her for a home-cooked meal.”
Banta liked the idea, so he invited the woman.
The day after the meal Santa calls Banta and asks about the meal.
Banta, “It was a flop idea.”
Santa, “Didn’t the girl come to your house?”
Banta, “She did, but she refused to cook!”

Banta Singh had to be admitted to hospital and was surprised to see Santa Singh on
the bed next to him. Santa Singh explained what happened to him.
He had gone to a remote village to work. He finished late and missed the last bus. He
couldn’t find any hotel.
So he approached a nearby house and asked the Owner whether he can stay there for the
night.
The Owner replied, “I have 2 grown up daughters. Sorry,I can’t allow you to stay.”
He approached the next house and asked whether he can stay there for the night.
The Owner replied,”I have 3 grown up daughters.Sorry,I can’t allow you to stay.”
He went to the next house and asked,” Do you have “grown up” Daughters?”.
The Owner asked,”WHY?????????”
Santa replied,”I wanted to stay here for a night…”