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MISS SOMEONE?

2 5 M I S TA K E S T O AV O I D W H E N
T RY I N G T O G E T Y O U R E X B A C K

BY ELIZABETH STONE

E X AT T R A C T I O N F O R M U L A . C O M

1. INVENTING BIZARRE REASONS TO


C O N TA C T T H E M .

Oh so I need to stop by immediatelyto get my


facial cleanser back.

2 . A C C I D E N TA L LY ( O N P U R P O S E )
RUNNING INTO THEM.

Weird, I was randomly in your neighborhood, 25


miles away from my house.

3 . C O N S T A N T L Y H A N G I N G O U T AT P L A C E S Y O U
USED TO GO TOGETHER.

This is MY bar.

4 . T RY I N G T O G E T R E V E N G E .

Im going to get back at him for saying that THING

5 . D E S T R O Y I N G Y O U R E X E S S T U F F.

If I burn everything, SHE WILL FINALLY REALIZE I


LOVE HER!!

6. TALKING TO YOUR EXES FRIENDS


ABOUT THEM.

So I wanted to talk to you about your buddy.


Whats he up to?

7 . C A L L I N G Y O U R E X E S PA R E N T S .

I wanted to call to see if your daughter is okay,


since she broke up with me last Tuesday.

8 . T RY I N G T O A P O L O G I Z E F O R
E V E R Y T H I N G T H AT W E N T W R O N G .

ITS AALLLLLLLLLL MY FAULT! I have failed you in


every way imaginable.

9. EMOTIONAL OUTBURSTS.
Ever sobbed loudly in the Target makeup aisle? I have.

10. STALKING (CYBER OR OTHERWISE).

Im going to just see what hes up to

11. DELETING YOUR EX ON SOCIAL MEDIA, THEN USING


Y O U R F R I E N D S P R O F I L E T O S E E W H AT T H E Y A R E U P T O .

Hey, weve got to find out who that mystery man


commenting on her profile is

1 2 . C O M PA R I N G Y O U R S E L F T O H I S E X E S
BEFORE YOU.

Im sooo much hotter than his ex, Eileen.

1 3 . L O O K I N G AT O L D P I C T U R E S O F Y O U
TWO TOGETHER.

We looked so perfect together!

1 4 . I N I T I AT I N G A W K W A R D W H Y ?
C O N V E R S AT I O N S .

WHHHYYYYYYY did you give up on us???

15. GOSSIPING ABOUT YOUR EX.


I heard that shes getting breast implants.

1 6 . A C C I D E N T A L LY T E X T I N G T H E M .

You: Hey sexy.


Your ex: Um Hi?
You: Oops, that was meant for someone else.

1 7 . O B S E S S I V E L Y S TAY I N G I N C O N TA C T.

I just wanted to check in, to tell you blah blah blah.

1 8 . R E F U S I N G T O A C C E P T R E A L I T Y.
Its not really over until I say its over.

1 9 . G E T T I N G J E A L O U S A N D A C T I N G I T O U T.

You EVEN

love your dog more than me!

2 0 . T RY I N G T O M A K E T H E M

Ill

JEALOUS.

show her what shes missing out on.

2 1 . C R E AT I N G E L A B O R A T E T H E O R I E S
ABOUT YOUR EX.

I think hes secretly gay.

2 2 . P L O T T I N G W AY S T O D R I V E Y O U R
E X E S N E W F L A M E A W AY.

Im just going to call her new boyfriend and tell him


they have to stop dating.

23. DRUNK DIALING.


I wanted to *hic* tell you that *hic* I MISS U BABE

24. SUGGESTING

EX SEX

So.. wanna get together?

2 5 . U S I N G T H E I D E A T H AT Y O U H A V E N O T H I N G L E F T T O L O S E
T O J U S T I F Y A N Y O T H E R B E H AV I O R Y O U K N O W I S W R O N G .

Im going to go to his house and cry on his


doorstep. Then hell *finally* know its meant to be.

WANT YOUR EX BACK?


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