2/21/2015

12TipsforNegotiatingandCompromisingwithDifficultPeopleDaleCarnegieBlog|DaleCarnegieBlog

Searchthissite

Blog

Categories

Archives

About

TipsForSuccess

Followus

DaleCarnegieBlog>DailyDoseofConfidence,HRIssueTips...>12TipsforNegotiating
andCompromisingwithDifficultPeople

DAILYDOSEOFCONFIDENCE,HRISSUETIPS,HRISSUES,LEADERSHIP/MANAGEMENT,
LEADERSHIP/MANAGEMENTTIPS,TEAMMEMBERENGAGEMENT,TEAMMEMBER
ENGAGEMENTTIPS,TIPSFORSUCCESS

12TipsforNegotiatingandCompromising
withDifficultPeople

MostTalkedAboutPosts

byCaug124

May17th,2010

1
Like

125

Tweet

52

114

10QuotesFrom
PresidentsWashington
&LincolnPresidents
Day

102

DaleCarnegiesDaily
DoseOfConfidence

99

21DayCarnegie
Challenge

64
Comment

Negotiatingistheprocessofattemptingtoagreeonasolution.Compromising,orsettlingona
mutuallyagreeablesolution,istheresultofsuccessfulnegotiations.Compromiseisallaboutbeing
flexible.Itmeansbeingabletogeneratealternatesolutionswhenyouvehitthewall.Whetherit
involvesapersonyoucantgetalongwith,anideayouknowwillworkbutthatothersarereluctant
toagreeto,achangeinofficesystems,oraturfwarthatneedsending,learningtonegotiateand
compromiseisessentialtoyoursuccess.
1.Haveapositiveattitude.
Yourattitudeisessentialtotheoutcome.Youhaveamuchbetterchanceofcomingtoanoutcome
involvingmutualgainsifyouapproachthenegotiationasanopportunitytolearnandachievea
winwinoutcome.
2.Meetonmutualground.
Findamutuallyagreeableandconvenientphysicalspacetomeetthatiscomfortableforall
involved.Agreeonwhenyouwillmeetandhowmuchtimeisavailabletodevotetotheprocess.
Wheneverpossible,dealwithnegotiationsfacetoface.Becarefulaboutusingthephoneande
mail.Alackoffacialexpressions,vocalintonation,andothercuescanresultinanegotiation
breakdown.
3.Clearlydefineandagreeontheissue.
Agreeonthestatementoftheissueusingsimpleandfactualterms.Ifthesituationis
multifaceted,searchforwaystoslicethelargeissueintosmallerpiecesanddealwithoneissueat
http://blog.dalecarnegie.com/leadership/12tipsfornegotiatingandcompromisingwithdifficultpeople/

1/4

2/21/2015

12TipsforNegotiatingandCompromisingwithDifficultPeopleDaleCarnegieBlog|DaleCarnegieBlog

atime.
4.Doyourhomework.
Taketimetoplan.Youmustnotonlyknowwhatisatstakeforyourself,butyouneedtoknowthe
othersidesconcernsandmotivation.Takeintoconsiderationanyhistoryorpastsituationsthat
mightaffectthenegotiations.Knowthemusthaves(nonnegotiableitems)andnicetohaves
(negotiableitems).Determinethebestresolution,afairandreasonabledeal,andaminimally
acceptabledeal.
5.Takeanhonestinventoryofyourself.
Determinetheleveloftrustyouhaveintheotherpersonandtheprocess.Beconsciousofaspects
ofyourpersonalitythatcanhelporhindertheprocess.
6.Lookforsharedinterests.
Getonthesamesidebyfindingandestablishingsimilarities.Sinceconflicttendstomagnify
perceiveddifferencesandminimizesimilarities,lookforcommongoals,objectives,orevengripes
thatcanillustratethatyouareinthistogether.Focusonthefuture,talkaboutwhatistobedone,
andtackletheproblemjointly.
7.Dealwithfacts,notemotions.
Addressproblems,notpersonalities.Avoidanytendencytoattacktheotherpersonortopass
judgmentonhisorherideasandopinions.Avoidfocusingonthepastorblamingtheother
person.Maintainarational,goalorientedframeofmind.Thiswilldepersonalizetheconflict,
separatetheissuesfromthepeopleinvolved,andavoiddefensiveness.

ResourceLibrary
FreeGuide:SalesSuccessTips

8.Behonest.
Dontplaygames.Behonestandclearaboutwhatisimportanttoyou.Itisequallyimportanttobe
clearandtocommunicatewhyyourgoals,issues,andobjectivesareimportanttoyou.

FreeWhitePaper:TalentManagement

9.Presentalternativesandprovideevidence.
Createoptionsandalternativesthatdemonstrateyourwillingnesstocompromise.Consider
concedinginareasthatmighthavehighvaluetotheotherpersonbutarenotthatimportantto
you.Frameoptionsintermsoftheotherpersonsinterestsandprovideevidenceforyourpointof
view.

FreeWhitePaper:EmployeeEngagement

10.Beanexpertcommunicator.
Nothingshowsdeterminationtofindamutuallysatisfactoryresolutiontoconflictmorethan
applyingexcellentcommunicationskills.Askquestions,listen,rephrasewhatyouheardtocheck
forunderstanding,andtakeagenuineinterestintheothersidesconcerns.Reducetension
throughhumor,lettheothervent,andacknowledgetheothersviews.Focuslessonyour
positionandmoreonwaysinwhichyoucanmovetowardaresolutionorcompromise.

FreeGuide:LeadingDuringOrganizational
Change

RecentPost

11.Endonagoodnote.
Developawinwinproposalandchecktomakesurethateveryoneinvolvedleavesthesituation
feelingtheyhavewon.Shakeonitandagreeontheactionsteps,whoisresponsibleforeach
step,howsuccesswillbemeasured,andhowandwhenthedecisionwillbeevaluated.Beopento
reachinganimpassefornoncriticalissuesyoucanagreetodisagreeonminorissues.
12.Enjoytheprocess.
Lookatthebenefitsoflearningotherpointsofview.Peoplereportthatafterovercomingconflict
andreachinganagreement,therelationshipgrewevenstronger.Reflectandlearnfromeach
negotiation.Determinethecriteriatoevaluatetheprocessandthesolution.

http://blog.dalecarnegie.com/leadership/12tipsfornegotiatingandcompromisingwithdifficultpeople/

2/4

2/21/2015

12TipsforNegotiatingandCompromisingwithDifficultPeopleDaleCarnegieBlog|DaleCarnegieBlog

RelatedPosts:

Categories

TipstoAllWinNegotiations
6WaystoEffectivelyDealwithTeamConflict
WinWinNegotiationTipsforManagers

CarnegieCoach(7)

6WinWinNegotiationTipsforManagers
ConflictMediation

Archives
Norelatedposts.

SelectMonth

Postacomment(1posted)

Login

Entercommenthere

Name

Email
Spamprotection:Sumof1+7?

PostComment

GuyFarmer/June14,2010at10:39am
Greatideas.Ivefoundithelpfulaswelltoworkondeepercommunicationand
buildingrelationships.Deepercommunicationisaboutpeoplebeingabletotell
theirstorywithoutanyoutsideinterference.Whenpeoplefeelheardithasa
soothingeffect.Buildingrelationshipshelpspeopleconnectwitheachotherand
canbeaccomplishedbysettingupandenvironmentwherepeopleareencouraged
toengageinakindandwelcomingmannerratherthanasadversaries.Italso
helpsifleadersaretrainedinhowtodiffuseconflictratherthanperpetuateoradd
toit.
Reply

http://blog.dalecarnegie.com/leadership/12tipsfornegotiatingandcompromisingwithdifficultpeople/

3/4

2/21/2015

12TipsforNegotiatingandCompromisingwithDifficultPeopleDaleCarnegieBlog|DaleCarnegieBlog

followuson
780ThirdAveC1,NewYork,NY100017,US
P.|TollFree800.231.5800

sitemap

privacypolicy

2012DaleCarnegietraining.AllRightsReserved.

http://blog.dalecarnegie.com/leadership/12tipsfornegotiatingandcompromisingwithdifficultpeople/

Joinourmailinglist

WebsitedesignbyIperdesign.com

4/4