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OccupyProhibition

July29,2014Edited

OneStory
Iwasbornwitharelativelyminorphysicaldefectwhichnonethelessleftmewithsomeissues.Ialsohadsome
traumaticeventsleavemeemotionallydevastatedduringmyyouth.Itookupsmokingasapreteenandfoundthatit
offeredmeameasureofreliefI'dneverknown.Italleviatedmydebilitatingheadaches,easedthepainI'dlivedwith
mywholelife,soothedmyseveremenstruationsymptoms,stimulatedanotherwisenonexistentappetite,relieved
nausea,&broughtsomepeacetomysademotionalstate.IsmokedformanyyearsandIunderstandthehelpitcan
be.Ialsoknowwhatit'sliketohavethestatestepin,accuseyouofassault,andstealyourchildrenforsmokingwhile
pregnant.Imanagedtogetmychildrenback"relatively"quicklybutittoreusallupandtherewasnosensetoit.
Mydoctorhadnothingbutkindwordsformeandtoldmemyfamily&Iwerethevictimsofasystemspunoutof
control.Idon'tsmokeanymoreoutoffear.
ItrytodealwithmyissuesasbestasIcan.Idon'ttakemedicationsordrinkalcohol.(Poisons)Idon'tsmoke
anything.Butwhenthere'sarelativelysafetreatmentformyvariousailmentsoutthere,IseenoreasonIshouldbe
forcedtorefrainfromusingitoutofthefearofhavingmykidsseized.
Ughhh...I'vebeenthinkingaboutwhatyousaidanddredgingupoldmemories,tryingtogetthingssortedoutinmy
head.Insomewaysmylifehasn'tbeentoobad,othersit'sbeenshit...butoneoftheworstmomentsofmylifewas
leavingthathospitalwithoutmybabyandknowingmychildrenweren'twaitingathome.KnowingthatIhadfailed
them,theirwellbeingandsafetywasatthatmomentcompletelyoutofmyhands.
Theywereatthemercyofstrangers,completeunknownswhodidn'tunderstandthemmightbehurtingthem.Itwas
desolateoutside,thesnowstormof'03hadcomethroughandtheworldlookeddead.Ifeltdeadinside.AtfirstI
couldn'tgotenminuteswithoutsobbing.Iwaseitherrackedwithgriefornumbanddistantfromshock.
We'dbeeninthemiddleofamovewhichwasobviouslyshotbutourstuffstillneededtobegottenoutofour
apartment.Everythingwe'dbeenplanningwasthrownoffcourseandwewereleftwithprettymuchnothing.Wehad
tostaywithmymomandherawfulthenhusbandatthetime.Iwascompletelyuselessduringthemove.Ijustkept
wanderingfromonethingtothenext,tryingtothinkofwhattodoandburstingintotearsasI'dthinkofthekidsormy
milkwouldletdown.
Theweatherwassobadtheydidn'tmovemydaughterfromthehospitalimmediatelysoIcalledthenurseryoftento
checkonher.Wedidn'tgettoseeourkidsinforever.They'dpushedthelimitoftimeandiftheyhadn'tfinallyletus
seethemwhentheyhad,theywouldhavebeenlegallyobligatedtoreturnthemtousonthespot.Hell,forallIknow
theymayevenhavegottenawaywithexceedingthetimelimit.
I'llbewritingsomemore.Thisstillhurtsprettybad.
Howlongdidittakeyoutogetyourchildrenbackifyoudon'tmindmeasking?
Afriendofminegavebirthtoherdaughterinprisonbecausecannabisistheonlythingthatalleviateshermood
swings.It'sinfuriating.
Idon'tmind.MychildrenwereallseizedonFebruary24,2003,2daysafterthebirthofmyyoungestdaughter.I
believewegotthembackonMay5ofthesameyear.Shewascoercedoutofmyarmsasshesleptbyanursewho
latercamebacktoapologizeforlyingtome.Shetoldmetheyhavetocomplywiththesocialworkersregardlessof
theirpersonalopinions.Iwentballisticatthesocialworkerwhenshetoldmetheyweredoingaremoval,screaming
"Youfuckingliar!"asIbolteddownthehallaftermychild.Iactuallymadeittothenursewithmydaughterbeforeshe
couldmakeitbehindlockandkey.Shelookedcompassionatelyintomyeyes&toldmeshewassorry...andIstopped
ratherthaninadvertentlycausemybabyharm.
I'dtriedtoquitsmokingduringmypregnancy,buthadbeensufferingfromdebilitatinghyperemesisgravidarum.I
couldn'tkeepANYTHINGdownwithoutit,&myhusbandfearingforourlives,toldmethatabstainingfromsmoking
woulddonooneanygood,ifIlostthebaby&/ordiedmyself.
Itseemedlikeeverynurseonshiftandthensomehadtocomeby,apologize,andtrytoofferwordsof
encouragement,&offernewparentbaggieswithtrivialtrinketstosendmehomewithinsteadofmybaby.Mydoctor
gavemeahug,toldmehewasproudofme,andtolethimknowwhenIgotthemback.

TheInvestigatorcamebytodoapsychevalonmesometimeafterkeepingmewaitingallday&intothenight.
Theywokemeoutofanexhaustedsleep,semideliriousafterjusthavingababy&havingherstolen.Shekept
askingleading,suggestivequestionsthatimpliedguilt&emotionalinstability,actinglikeIwasalunatic,&tryingto
projectsuicidalinclinationsontomeinhopesofusingagainstmelater.
IaskedherwhatthehellkindofemotionalstateIwassupposedtobeinaftertheystolemykids.Shetookadvantage
ofmyvulnerableemotionalstatetogetmetosignthings&saywhatbestservedhercase.
Shekepttryingtotellmehowitwasmyfaultforhurtingmybaby.ItoldherthatwascrapandI'dpersonallyhada
doctortellmehe'dneverseenanythingthatledhimtobelievesmokingmarijuanawasharmfultotheunbornchild.I
guessitwouldhavebeenpoliticallycorrecttoabortherandthatwouldn'thavebeenmurderbutkeepingher&
smokingwasassault.
Iarguedherintoadmittingthatcigarettes(whichshesmokedwhilepregnant)wereworsebutshestillfellbackonher
"marijuanaisillegal".Nice.
WegotputthrougharingerI'mnotevengoingtobegintocoverfornowbutitwashell.Theladyteachingour
mandatoryparentingclass(whichwasapatronizingjokebytheway)toldmeonly17%ofchildrenseizedoverdrugs
arereunitedwiththeirparentswhenItoldherwewereworkingtogetthemback.Itoldhershewaslookingatoneof
those17%andthenexttimeIsawher,mykidswerewithme.
Wewentthroughhellandtherewerethosewhoweretryingtomakeoursituationinsurmountablebutwewere
fortunatetohaveareallynicegirlasourcaseworker.
Duringthe"brieftime"theyweregonewhichseemedlikeaneternityweweretoldallmannerofridiculousthings
anddemandswereputonusthatmycaseworkeradmittedshepersonallywouldnothavebeenabletokeepupwith.
Ourchildrenwerecycledthroughatleast3differentfosterhomes.They'dalwaysbeenhealthyandhappybefore...
were(overmyobjections)bombardedwithvaccines&dangerous,controversialdrugsthathaveneverbeenapproved
inchildren,letalonetoddlers...suddenlytheywerechronicallyill,actingout,andseverelydepressed.Theylearned
theword"hate"&usedviolenceagainsteachotherforthefirsttimeinfostercare.Myoldestwasvomitingalmost
constantly.Itwastotalhellonallofus.
Peoplewereprojectingsexualabuseontothemthatneveroccurred.Theytrickedmyoldestdaughterthenonlythree
intosayingshe'dbeengivenadoobiewhichwasbullshit.(Whythehelldidn'ttheydrugtesther?!
Maybetheydidandintentionallyomittedtheresults.)
Iftheyhadn'tdonethatweprobablywould'vegottenthembacksooner.Theymadeherthinksayingthatwouldallow
hertogohome.Fuckingsick.Oneofthefosterparentstoldthemshewasgoingtoadoptthem.Somuchforre
unification.Anotherhowmeantheirparentswere.Yetanother,"IfanybodyevertouchesyouAGAIN,bitethem!"What
doesthatdototheheadofatraumatizedthreeyearoldwho'sonlysufferedabuseatthehandsofthepeoplewho
rippedherfamilyapart?!Theirlittle"Impartialperson"tooverseethingstoldusit'dtakearoundayeartogetthem
back&hadthenervetochuckleasshejoviallytoldusthatayearwasn'tverylong!Excusemebuttoababyora
grievingparent,that'salifetime!
Wheredotheyfindthesepeople?!
Mychildrenwereforcedtobearoundalcoholics&chainsmokers,leftunsupervisedindangeroussituations,were
constantlysubjectedtolanguageintendedtoalienatethemfromus.
Despitemyattemptstomaintainmysupplyofbreastmilkformybaby...Ilostmymilk...&someofmymostpathetic
momentsweresobbingwithmybreastsengorgedpainfullyinludicrousproportions,asIexpressedbreastmilk&
battledmastitis,grievingformystolenbabies...thatIcouldn'tprotect.
Anyway,ourlittlecaseworkerriskedherjobgoingagainstwhathersuperiorswanted,askingtheDAnottofightit
when
ourcasecameup.
Ourlawyerwasadecentwomankindenoughtohelpusfornexttonothing.ThejudgeRELUCTANTLYgaveusback
ourkidsratherthanhavethemgobackintoaFOURTHfosterhomeinatwomonthperiod.
Thesystembentusoveranddroveusbutintheend,allwecoulddowassmileandsaythankyouingratitudefor
havingourlittlebrokenfamilyputbacktogether.(We'veneverbeenthesame,though.)Atleasttherewereafew

goodpeoplewhocouldseeitwasabiggercrimetodestroyourfamily.
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RandyDavis,LilyValley,BrigettGebhartand16otherslikethis.

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3shares
KarenKaySosorrythesystemhurtyourfamily.Yourstorybroughttearstomyeyes.IhadtoenduretherathofTheSystem
whenmyhusband'sbrothermurderedhim.Theynevertookmychildrenbecausein1991theydidnotdrugtestwithout
"reasonablecause".We,asvictimswedidn'tfearthemurderer,wefearedtheflawedsystem.TheSystemofChildProtective
Servicesregardingtheingestionof(Medicinal)Marijuanahasgonebackwardsremindingmeofthe70'swhenwefearedthataseed
wouldputusinprisonfor20years.Themurdereronlyserved2.5yrs.my5childrenarestillsufferingfromtheflawedlegalsystem
after23years.Thedefenseattorneyused"adruginterventiongonebad"asadefense.Thankyouforstandingupandsharingyour
story.

3October28,2014at8:36am
LilyHoffmannPrettymuchsumsupthefostercaresystem.

1October28,2014at4:46pm