1

PEC8 LESSON 9 MAGAZINE ARTICLE

THE ART 1 OF BEING A TEEN 2
by Helena Justini
Being a teenager is NOT easy. It takes a high degree 3 of dedication 4 and persistence 5 to be
successful at this lifestyle. Over 7 the past several years, my friends Lucky (a.k.a.8 Lucy), Barkie (a.k.a.
Barbara), and I have, we believe, perfected 9 the art of being a teenager, and were ready to help our less
fortunate 10 colleagues 11 who dont yet understand what it takes to achieve 12 the perfection 13 which weve
attained 14. Weve created 15 the following Manual 16 of Being a Teen, and suggest that you study it as you
would study algebra or world history.
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Learn it! Live it! Love it!

[

] art

[__2_] teenager

] teen

[_6__] achieving the result that you want.

] degree

[_8__] also known as.

] dedication

[_5__] continuing to do something even though it is difficult.

] persistence

[_7__] during a period of time.

] successful

] over

] a.k.a.

[_4__] the act of dedicating or the state of being dedicated;

devotion.
[_3__] the amount or level of a quality or feeling that
something/someone has.
[_1__] a special skill a person learns through study and experience.

] to perfect

[_13_] a state in which someone/something is the best possible.

[ 10 ] fortunate

[_16_] instruction manual.

[ 11 ] colleague

[_10_] having good luck; lucky; happy.

[ 12 ] to achieve

[_14_] to achieve.

[ 13 ] perfection

[__9_] to make something as good as it can possibly be.

[ 14 ] to attain

[_15_] to make something new or original that didnt exist before.

[ 15 ] to create

[_11_] someone who you work with; fellow; partner; friend.

[ 16 ] manual

[_12_] to succeed in doing something or getting something,

especially after a lot of work.

RULE NUMBER ONE: CONSERVE 17 ENERGY

Never, under ANY circumstances, exert 18 more energy than necessary to complete 19 an activity or utterance 20.
The art of being a teen is the art of being lazy 21.

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22

Example 1: Its dinner time. Youre watching TV. Your mom asks you to set the table . Dont do it after she
asks the first time, even if youre so bored you would actually rather 23 set the table.
Shell have to ask again and will probably begin her second request with your full 24 name 25,
similar 26 to this: Helena Louisa de Almeida Justini!
Now answer her with a loud, Okay 27! But dont set the table yet. Wait a few more minutes.
Remember, your objective 28 isnt to make her mad, its just to procrastinate 29.
But shell be mad anyway. As soon as she yells 30 at the top of her lungs 31/32, THE TABLE HAS
NOT BEEN SET! DINNER IS ALMOST READY! SET THE TABLE! NOW! get up
immediately and walk to the kitchen or dining room 33 or wherever 34 your family eats dinner.
When you set the table, do if slowly 35 and mechanically 36, like a robot 37, without any emotion 38.
[

17 ]

to conserve

[_20_]

statement; declaration; sentence.

18 ]

to exert

[_23_]

to prefer to do or have one thing instead of another.

19 ]

to complete

[_21_]

not inclined to work, exercise, study, etc.

20 ]

utterance

[_18_]

a) to work very hard and use a lot of physical or mental energy

to do something; b) to exercise; to use.

21 ]

lazy

[_17_]

to preserve; to economize; opposite of to waste.

22 ]

to set the table

[_19_]

to finish doing or making something.

23 ]

would rather

[_24_]

complete.

24 ]

full

[_22_]

to put the dishes, forks, knives, etc., onto the table.

25 ]

full name

[_30_]

to talk very loudly.

26 ]

Similar

[_28_]

27 ]

Okay!

[_29_]

goal; purpose; something that you plan to achieve, especially

in business or work.
to delay doing something until later, usually something that
you do not want to do.

28 ]

objective

[_25_]

complete name.

29 ]

to procrastinate

[_27_]

OK!

[
[

30 ]
31 ]

to yell
Lung

[_31_]
[_26_]

organ in your chest that fills with air when you breathe.
with some qualities in common but not exactly the same.

32 ]

at the top of

[_34_]

in any place that you choose; used for showing that you do not
know where something is.

33 ]

dining room

[_36_]

in a mechanical way. mechanical = done without thinking.

34 ]

wherever

[_37_]

35 ]

slowly

[_32_]

36 ]

mechanically

[_33_]

a machine that can do work by itself; a machine or device that

operates automatically or by remote control.
ones lungs / ones voice = as loudly as you possibly
can.
a room, as in a house or hotel, in which you eat meals.

37 ]

robot

[_38_]

a feeling that you experience, for example love, fear, or anger.

38 ]

emotion

[_35_]

in a slow way. slow = opposite of fast; at low speed.

SUB-RULE 39
If a question can be answered with a one-word 40 answer 41, always use the one-word answer. More than one
word wastes energy.

3
42

Example 2: Youre going to the mall with your friends. So you put on your best jeans, your favorite t-shirt, and
your coolest sneakers.
Unfortunately, to get to the front door, you have to walk through the living room 43, where your dad
is doing something boring like watching the news on TV or reading the paper 44.
Hell ask, Hey, Ellie (or whatever 45 nickname 46 you go by 47), wherere ya goin? 48 in a very
friendly manner 49.
As 50 youre heading for the door, you should simply 51 answer Out. Dont use a mean 52 or
defensive 53 tone 54, because youre telling the truth. You are going out, and you shouldnt need to tell
him where youre going.
Hell respond 55, Oh. Okay whenll you be home? 56
While youre opening the door, answer, Later, and then blow him a quick kiss 57 and promptly 58
leave. (I guess if youre a guy, you probably dont need to blow the kiss.)
[

39 ]

sub-rule

[_43_]

40 ]

word

[_44_]

[
[
[
[

41
42
43
44

answer
to put on
living room
paper

[_39_]
[_40_]
[_41_]
[_45_]

45 ]

Whatever

[_42_]

[
[

46 ]
47 ]

nickname
to go by

[_52_]
[_50_]

[
[

48 ]
49 ]

Wherere ya goin?
manner

[_51_]
[_47_]

[
[

50 ]
51 ]

As
Simply

[_48_]
[_49_]

52 ]

Mean

[_46_]

53 ]

defensive

[_53_]

[
[

54 ]
55 ]

tone
to respond

[_55_]
[_58_]

showing that you are upset because you think someone is

saying something bad about you.
to answer; to reply.
right away; immediately.

56 ]

Whenll

[_54_]

attitude.

57 ]

to blow a kiss

[_57_]

58 ]

promptly

[_56_]

to kiss your hand and pretend to blow or throw the kiss to

someone.
(informal spoken English) When will

]
]
]
]

the main room in a house where you usually relax in

comfortable chairs and entertain guests.
newspaper; a daily publication containing current news,
articles, advertising, etc.
a secondary or subordinate rule.
a single unit of written or spoken language.
a spoken or written reply, as to a question.
everything or anything that; no matter what; anything that
is possible in a situation when we dont know exactly what
it might be.
to dress in clothing; to start wearing something; opposite of
to take off (clothes).
cruel; unkind; opposite of nice.
when; while; used for saying that something happens at the
same time as something else.
in a simple way.
to be called; to use a name for yourself that is not your real
name.
(informal spoken English) Where are you going?
the way that you do something, or the way that something
happens
an informal name that your friends or family call you that is
not your real name.

RULE NUMBER TWO: EMOTIONS ARE OVERRATED 59

Emotion is a waste 60 of energy in any situation that doesnt involve 61 a boyfriend or girlfriend, or obviously,
anger 62 at your parents, siblings, or enemies 63. But still, even if you are truly 64 mad, argue 65 with intelligence
66
and show no emotion.

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SUB-RULE
In any argument 67 with ANYONE family, friend, or foe 68 whoever 69 shows emotion first is a LOSER 70!
There are a few situations when you can show emotion:
1. Youre telling a cool story or joke to one of your friends;
2. Youre reacting 71 to a story or joke one of your friends is telling;
3. Theres a cute guy or girl nearby who youre very interested in and you want to get his or her attention 72;
4. Youre watching an interesting TV show or a movie;
5. Youre listening to any song that you like a lot (make sure to sing along loudly 73 just to bug 74 anyone
nearby);
6. I guess if youre a guy, when playing a cool video game or whatever;
7. Youre playing with a puppy or a kitten.
[
[

59 ]
60 ]

overrated
waste

[_61_]
[_65_]

to include or affect.
to debate; to talk about something with another person who
doesnt agree with you, often in an angry way.

61 ]

to involve

[_62_]

a strong feeling of displeasure or hostility; the state of

being angry.

62 ]

anger

[_66_]

the ability to understand and think about things, and to use

what you learn.

63 ]

enemy

[_60_]

bad use; a situation in which time, money, or energy is used

without bringing any useful result.

[
[
[

64 ]
65 ]
66 ]

Truly
to argue
Intelligence

[_63_]
[_64_]
[_59_]

rival; opponent; adversary; foe; opposite of friend.

really; very.
not as good or important as some people think or say it is;
overestimated.

67 ]

argument

[_73_]

in a loud manner; in high volume; opposite of softly.

[
[
[

68 ]
69 ]
70 ]

foe
whoever
loser

[_70_]
[_68_]
[_69_]

opposite of winner; unsuccessful person.

enemy; opposite of friend.
any person who; anyone that; no matter who; when we
dont know the exact name of a person in a situation.

71 ]

to react

[ 74 ] (informal) to annoy or irritate a person.

72 ]

attention

[_67_]

a discussion in which disagreement is expressed; a debate;

an angry disagreement between people.

[
[

73 ]
74 ]

loudly
to bug

[_72_]
[_71_]

interest; consideration; notice; perception.

to respond; to act in response to or under the influence of a
stimulus.

RULE NUMBER THREE: DISAGREE 75 SOFTLY 76

You know that emotion is a waste of energy. Use this knowledge 77 to your advantage 78 in conversations with
your parents. In any disagreement 79 with them, remember to argue without emotion. Let THEM waste the
emotional 80 energy.

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RULE NUMBER FOUR: GET WHAT YOU WANT
ATTENTION! DANGER 81! WARNING! The following section 82 requires that you exert energy, show emotion,
be agreeable 83, and be proactive 84! Thus 85 you must break all of the previously 86 mentioned rules to make this
work.
PROBLEM:
You saw a cool pair of jeans or a shirt at the mall. Or maybe you want a music player or a new
smartphone 87. Or you need a new pair of sneakers, but you want Mom to spend more money this time.
[
[
[

75 ]
76 ]
77 ]

to disagree
Softly
knowledge

[_79_]
[_80_]
[_81_]

a conflict or difference of opinion.

feeling or expressing a lot of emotion.
a situation in which something unpleasant might happen;
risk; insecurity.

[
[

78 ]
79 ]

to ones advantage
disagreement

[_75_]
[_77_]

to have a different opinion; opposite of to agree.

the state or fact of knowing; all the facts that someone
knows about a particular subject.

[
[

80 ]
81 ]

Emotional
Danger

[_78_]
[_76_]

to ones benefit; making someone more likely to succeed

in a soft manner; in low volume; opposite of loudly.

82 ]

section

[_84_]

[
[
[

83 ]
84 ]
85 ]

agreeable
proactive
thus

[_86_]
[_82_]
[_85_]

controlling a situation by doing something before a

problem develops.
before now; before the time you are discussing.
part of something.
as a consequence or result of something you have just
mentioned; consequently; in this way.

[
[

86 ]
87 ]

previously
smartphone

[_87_]
[_83_]

a mobile phone that also works as a small computer.

able, willing or ready to agree; concordant; pleasant..

RESOLUTION:
1. Youll need to answer your parents questions with full sentences 88, using a pleasant 89 demeanor 90;
2. Laugh at your dads jokes (this is EXTREMELY important);
3. (Optional 91) Dont get into big fights with your siblings (if you have any) for a while;
4. Give Mom and Dad (and your siblings, too, if you have any) more hugs 92 and kisses;
5. Youll need to keep your room clean, make your bed every morning before leaving for school, and put all
your dirty clothes in the hamper 93 on a nightly 94 basis 95;
6. Youll need to set the dinner table without being asked, clear the table 96 after dinner without being asked,
and help Mom and/or Dad wash the dishes after dinner;
7. Offer to serve Mom and Dad a nice beverage while theyre watching TV after dinner;
8. Watch TV with your parents. (I know, this sounds exhausting 97. Youll be frustrated 98
beyond 99 belief 100/101. Youll want to run out of the room screaming 102. But trust 103 us. Youll need to
show interest in what they are doing and temporarily 104 participate 105 in their lifestyle.)
[

88

sentence

[_95_]

used for saying how often something happens.

89

pleasant

[_91_]

available or possible if you want, but not obligatory or

mandatory.

[
[

90
91

]
]

demeanor
optional

[_94_]
[_96_]

every night.
to remove the dishes, food, and other things from the table

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after a meal.
group of words that express a statement, question, or
instruction; phrase; utterance.

92

Hug

[_88_]

[
[

93
94

]
]

hamper
Nightly

[_90_]
[_93_]

95

Basis

[_89_]

96

to clear the table

[_92_]

the action of putting your arms round someone to show

your love or friendship.

97

exhausting

[_98_]

having feelings of dissatisfaction; disappointed.

[
[
[

98 ]
99 ]
100 ]

frustrated
beyond
belief

[_97_]
[_103_]
[_102_]

something that makes you exhausted or tired.

to believe; to be confident that someone/something is true.
to make a loud high cry (noise) because you are hurt,
frightened, or excited.

101 ]

beyond belief

[_99_]

a) exceeding; superior to. b) used for saying that something

cannot be done.

[
[
[

102 ]
103 ]
104 ]

to scream
to trust
temporarily

[_105_]
[_100_]
[_101_]

to take part; to be involved.

trust; confidence; faith; conviction.
unbelievable; a) used for emphasizing how bad something
is. b) so surprising that you can't believe it.

105 ]

to participate

[_104_]

for only a limited period of time; for the moment.

the way you look and behave; behavior; conduct.

large basket to put dirty clothes in until they can be
washed.
nice; enjoyable or attractive in a way that makes you feel
pleased and satisfied; agreeable.

The length 106 of time youll have to perform 107 these activities will be variable 108. Often, your parents
personalities 109 will determine 110 how long itll take to get what you want. Other times itll depend upon 111
how much money you want them to spend.
Youll be exhausted, but dont give up. Your determination 112 will be rewarded 113!
Match the columns:
[

106 ]

length

[_109_]

a persons characteristics or aspects that make him/her

behave in a particular way.

[
[

107 ]
108 ]

to perform
variable

[_106_]
[_108_]

amount (of time); duration.

inconstant; something that changes often and is different
depending on the situation.

[
[

109 ]
110 ]

personality
to determine

[_111_]
[_113_]

on or onto something.
recompensed; compensated; to receive some kind of
benefit because of something you did.

[
[
[

111 ]
112 ]
113 ]

upon
determination
rewarded

[_112_]
[_110_]
[_107_]

resolution; purpose; conclusion; decision.

to control what something will be; to influence; to define.
to execute; to do.