Premarital Questionnaire

General

Why do you want to get married? What are your expectations?
Have you been married before? How many times?
Are you married now?
What are your goals in life? Or what do you aspire to be/do?
Identify three things that you want to accomplish in the near future.
Identify three things that you want to accomplish, long term.
Tell me about your education?
Do you have any particular habits I should know about?
Would you call yourself an introvert or extrovert?

Relationship

What can you offer your spouse; spiritually, emotionally, materially?
What do you expect from your spouse religious-wise, emotionally, and materially?
How do you believe the relationship between a husband & wife should be?


Religion

Does religion play a major role in your life? Do you practice its fundamental teachings?
Can you read the Quran in Arabic?
How many chapters from the Quran have you memorized?
Have you memorised any hadiths from the Prophet (peace be upon him)?
Do you adopt the ideas of any particular group? If so, why? Since when?
What is your relationship between yourself and your Muslim brethren in your area?
Have you ever volunteered for any Islamic, religious or social activities?
Is there anything in the religion that you feel doesn't make sense? If so, please give your reasons
why.

Family

What's the meaning of family for you?
How is your relationship with each of your family members?
What do you expect your relationship with the family of your spouse to be?
What do you expect your spouse's relationship with your family to be?
Is there anyone in your family living with you now?
Are you planning to have anyone in your family live with you in the future?
Do you mind having guests in your home on a regular basis?
What is your opinion of speaking other languages in the home that I do not understand such as with
you family or friends?


Friends

What qualities do you look for in a friend?
Who are your friends and how did you come to know them? (Identify at least 3) What do you like
most about them?
Do you have friends of the opposite sex? What is the level of your relationship with them now?
What will the level of your relationship with them be after marriage?
What type of relationship do you want your spouse to have with your friends?
What sort of relationship would you expect your spouse to have with his/her friends?
How do you make important and less important decisions in your life?


Anger & Abuse

How do you express your anger? What do you do?
Do you use foul language at home? In public? With family or friends?
Do your friends or family use foul language?
How do you expect your spouse to express anger?
When there is a dispute in your marriage, religious or otherwise, how should the conflict get
resolved? When should mediation be initiated?
What would you do if you felt that you had been abused?
Who would you call for assistance if you were being abused?
If someone has wronged you, what do you think should be done? How do you want him/her to
apologize to you?
Do you easily forgive?


Interests

What do you do in your free time?
Do you like to travel? If so, where?
How do you spend your vacations?
How do you think your spouse should spend his/her vacations or do in their free time?
Do you like to read? If so, what sort of books?


Health

Do you suffer from any chronic disease or condition?
Are you willing to take a physical exam by a physician before marriage?
What is your understanding of proper health and nutrition?
How do you support your own health and nutrition?
If I suffer from a disease (or currently am), how will you react to it?
If I am infertile, what would you do?
If any of the children are born disabled, how would you react to that?


Money

Do you work? If so, where?
How do you spend money?
How do you save money?
How do you think that your use of money will change after marriage?
Do you have any debts now? If so, how are you making progress to eliminate them?
Do you use credit cards?
Do you support the idea of taking Non-Islamic Bank loans to buy a new home?
What are you expecting from your spouse financially?
Do you support the idea of a working wife?
If so, how do you think a dual-income family should manage funds?
Do you currently use a budget to manage your finances?
Are you investing in anything at the moment?

Children

Do you want to have children? If not, how come?
If yes, ideally, how many children would you like to have?
Does it matter whether they are girls or boys?
Do you support the idea of utilizing baby sitters and/or maids?
To the best of your understanding, are you able to have children?
Do you want to have children in the first two years of marriage? If not, when?
Do you believe in abortion?
Do you have children now? If so, what is your relationship with them now (and their other parent)?
What kind of relationship would you expect your spouse to have with your children and their parent?
How would you like to raise your children? i.e.: morals, extra-curricular activities, education, friends
etc.
What is the best method(s) of disciplining children? Do you believe in spanking children? Under what
circumstances?
What type of relationship do you want your children to have with all their grandparents?
What type of relationship should your children have with non-Muslim classmates/friends?
Do you believe in public, private (any) or private Islamic school for your children?
Do you believe in home schooling for your children?


You

How were you raised/disciplined? Do you like the way you were raised?
Do you like to joke around at all?
Would you consider yourself a listener?
Do you have any particular insecurities about anything?
How do you think our wedding should be? Music? Segregated? Honeymoon?