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CLEAN Talk

TM

Four Ways to Catalyze
Positive Performance


Learning Design & Capability Development
for Leaders & Teams

www.susandegenring.com
www.susandegenring.com/blog
susan@susandegenring.com
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2010 Susan DeGenring www.susandegenring.com 2





































2010 by Susan DeGenring.

CLEAN Talk: Four Ways to Catalyze Positive Performance


Clean Talk
TM
is a trademark of Susan DeGenring and Shadow Work

Seminars

All rights reserved. This work, or parts thereof, my not be reproduced in any form, including
digital or photocopying, for internal use or for sale without written permission from the author.

www.susandegenring.com


2010 Susan DeGenring www.susandegenring.com 3


TABLE OF CONTENTS

Introduction
What is Clean Talk?
Why Should You Care?
Clean Talk Background
The Art of Conversation
4
Strategy Behind Clean Talk 7
How It Works
Four Channels of Communication
9
The Data Channel 13
The Assessment Channel 14
The Wants Channel 15
The Feelings Channel
Emotional Intelligence
Whats in a Feeling?
The Four Basic Emotions
16
Integration Clean Talk in Your Life
Six Steps for Developing Clean Talking Habits
Clean Talk
TM
Template
22


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If you lead teams, collaborate on teams, are responsible for the professional
development of teams and leaders, or simply want to improve your own
leadership skills, this booklet is for you.

What is Clean Talk
TM
?
Clean Talk
TM
is a communications approach
specifically designed for expressing challenging
or difficult messages by using language to evoke
collaboration rather than compliance, proaction rather than
reaction, and agility rather than rigidity. The result highly
resilient work partnerships that produce positive performance.
Why should you care?
Speaking cleanly using language clean of emotional
triggers, imperious tones, or veiled accusation results in
more clarity and efficiency in situations in which you depend
on others to get the job done (which most of us do). Not being
thoughtful and strategic about our use of language can generate
resentment, resistance, or apathy in our colleagues and instill
an environment of fear and mistrust, especially by leaders with
influence and power.
On the other hand, in a world where executive and political scandal seem to erupt in the news
every other week, leadership transparency and authenticity are becoming more and more
valuable qualities. The ability to work well with others, handle pressure, get work done through
others these are all related to whether the language you use is congruent with the messages
people pick up. The context of the situation, your body language and your tone of voice all pack
into the meaning people make of your words. And these all elicit emotional responses, favorable
or not, in our listeners. Awareness of this directly impacts a leader or teammates performance.
This approach to
emotional
intelligence through
the lens of Clean Talk
will give you
practical ways to
manage your
conversations and
access emotion as a
lever of positive
performance.
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CLEAN TALK FOUR WAYS TO CATALYZE POSITIVE PERFORMANCE


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We have hard data to confirm this. In Daniel Golemans research on emotions in the workplace,
outlined in Working with Emotional Intelligence,
1
he compared competency models across 121
organizations defining what makes for successful performance. The results are startling:
67% two out of three of the abilities deemed essential for effective
performance were emotional competencies. Compared to IQ and expertise,
emotional competence mattered twice as much. This held true across all
categories of jobs, and in all kinds of organizations. (page 31)
So why do we cling to the illusion that emotions have no place at work? Given the evidence of
their importance as a performance success indicator, youd think wed pay more attention. But the
truth is that being effective and emotionally authentic in the workplace is more challenging that it
should be. I maintain its because we havent been well trained not in business school, not in
many of our families, not in our formative elementary educations. This approach to emotional
intelligence, through the lens of Clean Talk, will give you practical ways to manage your
conversations and access emotion as a lever of positive performance rather than ignore feelings
yours and those of others as if they dont exist or have no impact.
Clean Talk Background
Clean Talk began with the work of Cliff Barry, founder of Shadow Work

Seminars. This brilliant


method of self-development, based partly on the works of psychologist Carl Jung, focuses on the
inner life of the leader. Together, Cliff and I refined the techniques and concepts of Clean Talk,
informed by my years of practical experience consulting to executives and teams on the capacity
to collaborate and succeed while working in highly matrixed or participative organizations.
Much has been written about the shadow which, broadly defined, includes both the functional
and dysfunctional parts of our personalities that we have hidden or repressed. Indeed the concept
has been popularized by the work of several well-known gurus and authors. I reveal this legacy of
Clean Talk not with a little trepidation as psychology, popularized as self-help, can be easily
misunderstood or trivialized, at best, and at worst, misapplied with damaging results.
2


1
The concept of Emotional Intelligence has now been in the collective business dialogue for over 10 years, ever since
Daniel Goleman wrote his groundbreaking book on the topic in 1997. And the research it was based had been collected for
25-30 years before that. His follow up research about EI in the work of work, was published in 1998 in Working with
Emotional Intelligence.
2
As an example, its a very common misconception that the shadow refers only to the dark and destructive sides of us.
Nothing could be further from the truth! Shadow simply means those aspects of our personality both golden and joyful
as well as dysfunctional or destructive that for some reason, we have lost access to or control over. For more on the
shadow go to www.shadowwork.com.


2010 Susan DeGenring www.susandegenring.com 6


All of which I find a shame because the wisdom inherent in the understanding of shadow has
very practical and much needed applications in the world of work and collaboration.
The Art of Conversation
One such practical application is the art of conversation. All collaborative action, meaning
most work environments, are made up of thousands of conversations. And conversations are
imbued with emotionally evocative language. There is much media today devoted to the art of
conversation in the work arena and the world of personal relationship. Clean Talk, however, is a
little different in that it integrates what weve learned about emotional intelligence with how the
shadow leaks into and hijacks our conversations. Weve all been there: the meeting that
went drastically wrong, turning on the dime of one ill-composed statement. Or the fight with your
boss that resulted in alienation and your own disenfranchisement as a viable replacement
candidate for his position. Im sure you, reader, could list your own examples ad infinitum.
I wont go into much depth here about Shadow Work

and its well-researched tradition and


broad applications. Most valuable to understand is simply that you can learn an extraordinary
amount about yourself, your colleagues and your work environment by looking through a human
systems lens. Im talking here about a particular type of lens, one that sees systems as made up of
archetypal behavior whether organizational, group or personal. The word archetype actually
means ancient patterns. We know from studying history, cultural legends, and other social
sciences that patterns of behavior persist across culture and time. And because of this, they
provide us with a very useful perspective into what works and doesnt as humans interact with
each other. Clean Talk applies this archetypal lens to the realm of communication and emotional
intelligence.
Lets look at how this approach works to catalyze positive performance.




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THE STRATEGY BEHIND CLEAN TALK
As we go about our daily lives, most of us are unaware of that silent part of ourselves
constantly scanning incoming communications and observing events, searching out
potential threats. Some may feel it as intuition or that little voice that tips us off
when something is not quite right. Here well refer to this part as an internal radar
operator. Its constantly seeking, like a cell phone looking for signal. What signals
your internal radar picks up depends on whats lodged in your own threat bank,
your own neural data storage comprised of a life time of emotional responses to experience
some good, some great, some average, some bad, some really, really bad. Your data bank is
neutral. It doesnt evaluate, it just records, every single emotional response to every single thing
that ever happened to you gets permanently stored in there. When a signal comes back from your
internal radar operator that matches something in the data files, your synapses fire in your brain,
motivating behavior and language. It
happens faster than you can blink.
So, essentially, were like a world of
mobile phones constantly scanning,
bouncing our radar off each other.
Mostly, we pick up nothing threatening,
but then theres that moment a look, a
tone, a gesture that triggers a memory
in our own threat bank and off we go.
Simple example: When you walk into a
conference and notice that youre the
only one in the room wearing a suit, your
radar operator scans your threat bank
and stumbles upon emotional memory of
junior high school dances, and starts
sending you signals: youre
overdressed; you look too eager; you
stick out like a sore thumb; youre a loser; go back and change
Know that voice? We all have it. Its hardwired into our neural physiology. Its a key brain
function that helps keep us both psychologically and physically safe in the world. Although some

Internal Radar transmitting like cell phones
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of us no longer live in threat of our physical well-being on a daily basis, we have any number of
psychological pitfalls to navigate regularly in our busy modern lives rocky relationships, stress
at work, financial worries, growing older, taking care of family, etc.
So what, thats just life, right? Yes, and, when engaged in conversation with others, you are also
encountering their radar operators. Your speaking will have to make it through their defense
system. So, to communicate effectively, especially in times of over-stimulation, excitement or
stress (e.g., everyday for most of us working stiffs), you want to speak to people in ways that you
can be reasonably sure will avoid triggering your listeners internal radar operator and, even
better, elicit productive, collaborative responses improving working relationships all around.
Clean Talk is not for every conversation you have. Such constant self-monitoring would be crazy
making. So relax, youre causal conversation over a morning latt is safe!
Use Clean Talk when
! youre feeling anxious because you have to provide difficult-to-deliver feedback.
! youre discussing a topic with a lot at stake and, because of this, high emotional
complexity.
! youre in a meeting where its important for your message to be heard clearly and
unambiguously.
! you assess that a situation requires a calming and grounding influence.
! you think a client or colleague will not want to hear what you have to say.

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FOUR CHANNELS OF COMMUNICATION
Clean Talk opens up trust and allows for more responsibility to be shared in
conversations and in the work you do together. The key is to speak through not one,
but four communication channels (see Figure 1):
! Data/Facts Channel
! Assessments/Judgments Channel
! Wants/Requests Channel
! Feelings/Emotions Channel

By channels we mean conduits through which information is transmitted by the speaker and
processed by the receiver. Being aware of these four channels creates less room for interpretive
error and helps avoid defensive responses. In this way, Clean Talk sets the environment for more
positive and productive performance.
Heres how it works. Each channel has common mis-speaks or errors we habitually make. These
habits of speaking can have detrimental effects on others, but also can affect our own frame of
mind. The following pages outline what each channel comprises and the common mis-speaks for
each to help you become a more effective communicator and build an environment for positive
performance using Clean Talk.
Note: Please take all these techniques and formats as guidelines to consider, not absolute
mandates for how you speak. The most important thing to understand are the strategies
underlying the techniques, not the specific terminology or format. All speaking is contextual and
my hope is that you will use this material to train your brain to assess or see your leadership and
team situations through these lenses and make context specific choices about how you apply the
techniques.
See CLEAN Talk model on the next page.


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This CLEAN Talk framework can be used in three ways:
To analyze a situation for more understanding and self-awareness.
To plan a difficult conversation.
To conduct a difficult conversation.


CLEAN Talk Four Channels of Communication
Data/Facts
Feelings/
Emotions
Wants/
Requests
Assessments/
Judgments
CLEAN TALK
Figure 1

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Data/Facts
This is the information that contains an exact description of the behavior or words in question. It
is factual evidence that you can clearly describe. This is what you can see and hear as a video
recorder would data without interpretation. In a conversation between two people, the facts are
one of the few things people might agree on. Almost everything else is subjective and open to
interpretation.
Assessments/Judgments
This channel carries your assessments, critical
judgments, perceptions, opinions or beliefs. It is
useful to understand it as such. This is not
necessarily the truth about anything; it is merely
what you find yourself thinking. The key to this
channel is to own these as your assessments rather
than stating them as fact or feeling.
Wants/Requests
This is what you want or would like for yourself or
your team. Expressing what you want gives the
listener a better understanding of what action could
be taken to satisfy your issues or concerns. It also
indicates that youre willing to take some
responsibility for engaging in resolution rather than
just complaining. It does not carry with it, however,
any guarantee that you will actually get what you
want. It is simply the expression of the want.
However, the more measurable and specific you can
be in describing what you want, the better chance you have of getting it.
Emotions/Feelings
This is your emotional check-in. With feeling statements, you want to indicate the state of your
emotions as they impact or are affected by the situation. The key here is not to accuse another
person of causing your emotional state, but rather to recognize your feeling state and to own it.
Most feeling states boil down to one of these four primal feelings: happy, sad, angry, or afraid.
There are many other derivatives, however these often move the speaker up another level of
The ability to demonstrate
empathy, take initiative, or
pursue goals despite obstacles
and set backs are more than
just soft skills. They are
increasingly critical every day
that our world becomes bigger
and more complex. More
diversity, more global
relationships, more tightly
intersecting economies all
require an ability to adapt and
flex to account for less and less
predictability.


2010 Susan DeGenring www.susandegenring.com 12

interpretation, and cross back into the Assessment/Judgment Channel. It is easier to keep your
communication clean by labeling your feelings using one of the basic four as youll have a better
chance of experiencing them cleanly yourself without critical interpretation.


We had the experience but missed the
meaning / And approach to the
meaning restores the experience in a
different form.
from The Dry Salvages in
T.S. Eliots Four Quartets

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THE DATA CHANNEL
Data, Facts, Instances, Behaviors
This is the information you provide that contains an exact description of the behavior
or words in question. It is factual evidence that you can clearly describe, almost as if a
video camera had recorded them.
In order for people to evaluate, agree with or propose other options to you, its critical as a leader
that you give them, not just your point of view, but also the data its based on. Data is objective
and opinion-neutral, or as close to neutral as you can get. But thats easier said than done.
Common Mis-Speaks in the Data Channel
! Bleeding over from other channels. Misrepresenting information from another channel
as data, i.e., representing an assessment, a judgment or even a feeling as data. Example: I
feel annoyed that you are rocking the boat without any good reason. (Feelings
masquerading as data.)
! Leaving out the data. Not providing any data at all to back up your opinions. Example:
Global warming is a worldwide phenomenon. Or The client really isnt interested in the
Consequence Mitigation part of the package were trying to sell them.
Of course this mis-speak is really inconsequential if all youre doing is having a casual
conversation in which no one really cares about the impact or outcome. But when it counts,
when budget or policy decisions, profits or work processes depend on people agreeing on how
to move forward, being careful about the data you base your statements on is very important.
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THE ASSESSMENTS CHANNEL
Assessments, Judgments, Interpretations, Perceptions, Conclusions
This channel carries your assessments, critical judgments, perceptions, opinions or
beliefs its what you find yourself thinking in response to a situation or the behavior
of others. Unfortunately, we often speak as if our points of view, opinions or
experience is fact. Its not fact. You are not the all-knowing, all-seeing arbiter of what
is and isnt true. (I know it can come as a shock to some of us!). The problem is, what
one person sees as a healthy delicious meal of raw cabbage and boiled potatoes,
another would find completely distasteful. What one person sees as a reasonable
budget surplus another sees as an inefficient work process. Different assessments of
the same data.
However, sharing your opinions is an important aspect of collaboration and getting quality work
done. Its also useful for people to know you and what youre thinking about, especially as a
leader. It helps them navigate their own work and understand you better. Just dont make the
mistake of assuming because this is how you perceive it, that everyone you work with sees the
same thing.
Common Mis-Speaks in the Assessment Channel
! Stating opinion as fact. Representing, as fact, information that is simply our point of
view. This is the flip side of the coin for some Data mis-speaks. Example: You havent taken
in the seriousness of this situation. (Based on what? This is your assessment being stated as
data, with no actual data provided.)
! Embedding accusations in your own perceptions. Making accusations about others
behavior or actions, and the motivation behind them, as if they were indisputable fact.
Example: You always want me to clean up after your mess! (Again, based on what? This is
your assessment being stated as data, with no actual data provided.

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THE WANTS CHANNEL
Wants, Requests, Likes, Desires
This is what you want or would like from another person or group of people that will
help move things in a positive direction. Often we are much more aware of what we
dont want rather than what we want or request for forward action. The dilemma is
that focusing mostly on what we dont want or whats not working, can have two
negative consequences: 1) its hard for others to take affirmative action on a negative want, and 2)
it can drain emotional energy because you risk setting others up with the responsibility for fixing
your discontentment. Especially as leaders, people can resent this or fall short of your
expectations for what will work for you. The more concrete you can be about what your request is,
the better chance you have of results satisfaction. And more results satisfaction makes everyone
happier.
Common Mis-speaks in the Wants Channel
! Negative wants. Saying what you dont want instead of what you do want. Negative wants
allow you to avoid taking responsibility for what will work for you and keep you wedged into a
negative or victimized state.
! Disowned or co-dependent wants. Saying what you want for others instead of what you
want for yourself. This is another form of unconsciously taking yourself (or your team) out of
the picture and setting up a situation where you end up feeling dissatisfied. Example: (You
work in sales) I want marketing to have more resources to contribute. (And, what do you
want for sales, how will marketing having more resource support your objectives?)
! Vague wants. Describing your wants in general terminology. Often, as a leader, youre not
providing quite enough for people to act on when being too general or open. It is an art to
provide the vision or strategy of what your direction is without micromanaging or
overprescribing. Example: I really want our customers to experience supreme service.
(Thats great. But what kind of supreme service? And with what trade-offs in priorities? Or
what resources are available to support this?)
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THE FEELINGS CHANNEL
Emotions, Feelings
Having emotions is unavoidable. They are hard-wired into our survival capacity and
are a physiological response. Pretending they are not there, or trying to change them is
futile. Rather, acknowledge them and use them, as appropriate, to clarify your own
reactions or behaviors.
If you really think carefully about this topic, youll realize that you are communicating
your emotions whether or not you intend to. Body language, which we cant see being
transmitted, betrays us far more than what we say. So we might as well take some modicum of
control over how our emotions are communicated and impact others.
So, this channel is your emotional check-in. With
feeling statements, you want to indicate the state of
your emotions as they impact or are affected by the
situation. The key is to recognize your feeling state and
to own it. As I stated in the Introduction, the field of
emotional intelligence has brought great clarity to this
soft topic of feelings. Its very important to de-mystify
emotions and their impact in the workplace. So lets
delve a bit into this material.
Emotional Intelligence A different way of being smart.

Emotional intelligence is defined as how we manage emotions in ourselves and others. I will
briefly bring in Goleman again, whom I believe has brilliantly defined and simplified the
confusing territory around emotions. According to Goleman, there are two kinds of competencies
that contribute to emotional intelligence personal competence and social competence.
3

Understanding how each set of these competencies plays out will support you as a leader, both in
using your own emotions for positive impact, as well as in supporting others to manage their own.

3
From Working with Emotional Intelligence, Daniel Goleman, Bantam Books, October, 1998, pp. 26-27.
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Were not thinking beings
who feel. Were feeling
beings who think.
from the BBC documentary,
The Secret Life of the Brain

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Personal Competence
These competencies determine how we manage ourselves.
! Self-Awareness: Knowing ones internal states, preferences, and resources.
This includes: recognizing own emotions and their effects, knowing ones strengths and
limitations, having a strong sense of ones self worth and capabilities.
! Self-Regulation: Managing ones internal states, impulses and resources.
This includes: keeping destructive impulses in check, flexibility in handling change, being
comfortable with novel ideas and new info, maintaining standards of honesty and integrity.
! Motivation: Emotional tendencies that guide or facilitate reaching goals.
This includes: aligning with the goals of the group or organization, striving to improve or
meet a standard of excellence, persistence in pursuing goals despite obstacles.
Social Competence
These competencies determine how we handle relationships.
! Empathy: Awareness of others feelings, needs, and concerns.
This includes: sensing others feeling and perceptions and taking an active interest in their
concerns, reading the power relationships in a group, supporting others in getting their needs
met.
! Social Skills: Adeptness at inducing desirable responses in others.
This includes: working with others in pursuing collective goals, listening openly, sending
convincing messages, negotiating and resolving disagreements.
In reading through these lists, theres no doubt in my mind that, from my experience in the
organizational world, most people I know (including myself) can always improve in these areas.

2010 Susan DeGenring www.susandegenring.com 18

Inability to demonstrate empathy, or to take initiative, or to pursue goals despite obstacles and set
backs are more than just soft skills. They are increasingly critical every day that our world
becomes bigger and more complex. More diversity, more global relationships, more tightly
intersecting economies all require an ability to adapt and flex to account for less and less
predictability. This is true for all workers, but especially for leaders.
So lets work on getting even more fundamental and concrete about feelings. The following
information identifies the four basic feeling states, defines them and identifies emotionally
intelligent actions to take in working with each.
Whats in a Feeling?
Feelings are states of being that act as indicators. These indicators point to important underlying
dynamics that influence peoples actions. Being able to recognize feelings provides valuable
information for managing performance and interpersonal situations.
And, feelings are much easier to recognize and deal with if you have only a few to chose from.
There are four primary feelings in which most other feeling states are rooted angry, afraid, sad,
and happy. (As I said before, other disciplines identify more than four. We consider these the four
the basic archetypal emotions out of which the others grow.) Recognizing these feeling states is
the first step in developing competence to support yourself and others in communicating cleanly.
The charts on the following pages illustrate the four basic emotions, what causes them, and
actions you can take (on your own behalf or to support another) to manage them by:
(i) simply acknowledging the feeling state,
(ii) transforming it into something more productive or positive, or
(iii) creating conditions for the situation to evolve appropriately.

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FEELING STATE:
ANGRY

Caused by limits being transgressed or
barriers being imposed that violate your
interests and needs, or those of your group.

" Set boundari es
Draw a line to protect your interests,
e.g., state how much time you can
commit to a project and how much
you cannot.
" Change boundari es
Adjust your limits to better suit the
requirements you think are
important, e.g., I can no longer drive
100km each way to work everyday,
but I am willing to do it 3 days a
week and telecommute the rest of the
time.
" Remove boundari es
Lift constraints from a situation to
release tension and free up creativity,
e.g., tell a team they can disregard,
temporarily, existing quality
constraints while pursuing a difficult
production breakdown.
ACTIONS TO TAKE:
AFRAID

Caused by something coming that you think
will harm you or that you dont want.

" Ret reat and wai t f or a bet t er
t i me
Fear is an important emotion, telling
you that something is not safe. Its an
invaluable source of input or intuition,
e.g., delaying confronting an
adversary until you have more
political and emotional support.
" Face t he i ssue/f i ght back
Taking on your fear often helps
minimize or eradicate the
boogeyman nature of fear, e.g.,
finally taking that public speaking
course.


Other words: frustrated, humiliated,
annoyed, irritated
Other words: anxious, apprehensive,
frightened
THE FOUR BASIC EMOTIONS

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FEELING STATE:
SAD

Caused by losing something important to
you, sometimes very subtle, sometimes
very overt.

" Acknowl edge l oss
Allow the feeling to be present and
acknowledge that its legitimate to
feel the loss, e.g., when a project
youve worked long and hard on has
been canceled that.
" Cut your l osses
Acknowledge that something has
been lost, but take action to prevent
further loss, e.g., when needing to
cut the budget, restructure so that
existing personnel can be protected.
" Ret ri eve somet hi ng
After acknowledging the loss, find
something else to take its place, e.g.,
when losing a job, doing volunteer
work to replace the sense of
purpose, while searching for new
employment.




ACTIONS TO TAKE:
Other words: grief, melancholy,
sorrow

HAPPY

Caused by getting something you want that
satisfies and provides joy.

" Pay at t ent i on and not i ce
To often in striving to get things
done, we only see whats going
wrong and fail to notice the good,
e.g., when we hit a milestone in a
project.
" Cel ebrat e!
There are so many reasons to be
anxious and fretful in a busy life,
making it ever more important to
stop to acknowledge and
celebrate the good and beneficial,
e.g., giving small but meaningful
tokens of appreciation for a job
well done. These acts of celebration
insert energy and vitality into a
team or partnership and build
healthy, resilient relationships.


Other words: glad, thrilled, excited


2010 Susan DeGenring www.susandegenring.com 21

Common Mis-Speaks in the Feelings Channel
! Accusing someone else of creating your internal feeling state, e.g., You made
me feel. While others clearly impact our experience, and can influence what we feel,
empowering them with the capacity to make you feel in any particular way fully
disempowers both you and your ability to manage your emotions. So even if your employee
habitually makes you mad with his irritating habits, taking responsibility for your own
emotional reaction is the intelligent thing to do. Because, truth is, the same behavior
exhibited by the same employee (data) might make someone else happy. So, looked at in
that light, its awfully difficult to avoid the conclusion that its your threat profile thats being
activated. Which means its your responsibility to manage your emotions. Sorry
! Using feeling to indicate an assessment or judgment, e.g., I feel like. This is
extremely common phraseology used in the English language I feel like you should have
known better. Or, I feel like weve been able to solve this problem before, and now are
stumped. This is your assessment masquerading as a feeling. Its not that its greatly
problematic to do this accept if this is your habit, you run the risk of surreptitiously confusing
what you are thinking with what you are feeling. And that can make it difficult to pierce the
cognitive veil that sometimes surrounds our feelings. Also, its a bit sloppy and, somehow, a
bit soft I think. Communicate feelings when there are feelings and assessments when there
are assessments, and youll be much easier to understand and work with.


2010 Susan DeGenring www.susandegenring.com 22

CLEAN TALK IN YOUR LIFE
Congratulations! Youre on your way to cleaner communication. Now comes the
integration into your work and life.
Clean Talk is based on this premise: in any complex discussion, all four channels of
communication Data, Assessments, Wants, and Feelings are present and active.
Transmissions are running through each channel and people are picking them up,
whether you intend to be transmitting them or not. So, the question is not if theyre
active, but whether youre controlling what youre communicating through them.
Actors are stellar at this. They have learned to track and actively modulate what they
communicate and through which channel. We dont all have to be trained in Strasbergs Method
Acting to be successful communicators. Just a little concerted effort to practice Clean Talk will do.
One important tip: as you continue practicing in conversations that are challenging or difficult,
try to speak through as many of the channels as you can. That will provide the most clarity for
your listener. This may not always be possible or appropriate. Use your common sense. But when
you leave out a channel for example, data, you could be opening the conversation to mis-
interpretation and misunderstanding.
The tools on the following pages will aide you in both preparing for and practicing Clean Talk.
A Note about Email
Email is a communications nightmare for so many reasons we write while multitasking, we hit
the Send button too soon, we dont review before sending, we write when were reactive, etc. Its
one of the most challenging formats in which to have your message interpreted the way you
meant it. Everything Ive said in the previous 30 pages goes double for email. Clean Talk is the
perfect tool for writing clear, emotionally clean emails. Try it using the Clean Talk
TM
Preparation
Worksheets on pages 34-37 to guide you.
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2010 Susan DeGenring www.susandegenring.com 23


SIX STEPS FOR DEVELOPING CLEAN TALKING HABITS


1. First, notice and separate out the Four Channels as you listen to others
speaking.
2. Then, begin hearing and seeing Mis-Speaks. Treat it like a game. Theyre
everywhere! (CSPAN is a great place to see massively, egregious mis-
speaks).
3. Journal or note for yourself what mis-speaks you are most prone to.
4. Practice addressing these by using Clean Talk techniques in low-risk
situations.
5. Pick and plan some challenging conversations by writing out the hard parts of
what you want to say using the template on the next page.
6. Talk cleanly when it counts! Remember, you dont have to do it all the time,
just when the stakes are high.

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2010 Susan DeGenring www.susandegenring.com 24

CLEAN TALK
TM
TEMPLATE
The following template can be used as a guideline for practicing when you first
begin integrating all the channels together. Eventually you will find your own
natural style and language. Using this exact format is not as important as
employing the techniques based on the principles outlined in this booklet.
Happy talking!











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2010 Susan DeGenring www.susandegenring.com 25

WANT MORE?

If you would like more information about Clean Talk, would like some coaching in using Clean
Talk, or would like to set up a Clean Talk workshop for your organization, please contact:



















Learning Design & Capability Development
for Leaders & Teams
O: 720.494.7794
M: 970.215.2485

www.susandegenring.com
www.susandegenring.com/blog
susan@susandegenring.com

2010 Susan DeGenring www.susandegenring.com 26


ABOUT SUSAN DeGENRING
Susan DeGenring is a learning designer, leadership
development coach, graphic recorder and web-based
instructional designer/facilitator specializing in collaborative
capability development and scalable, blended learning design.
Her purpose is to make knowledge and skill more accessible
through best-in-class instructional design and productizing and
branding powerful learning experiences. She works with
organizations to build learning programs for leaders, teams,
coaches and change agents to achieve positive, long-term
behavior change over time and develop their capacity for authentic, responsible leadership.

Experience
When you partner with Susan DeGenring you have access to 20 years experience and content
expertise including:
! consulting to large organizations on creating customized, blended leadership development
programs
! conducting comprehensive executive coaching programs in Fortune 500 and not-for-profit
organizations
! building turnkey products and services from concept-to-customer for developing leadership,
team, and facilitator competencies
! transferring classroom training to highly engaging web-based learning
! facilitating leaders and teams toward improved collaboration and performance
! designing and facilitating retreats to build alignment and facilitate problem solving for
strategic and operational planning

Her work is known globally through leadership, coaching, team and facilitation curricula she has
built and implemented for international organizations. These programs have been trained by
Susan and licensed worldwide by other consultants, trainers and coaches.

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