Etiquette (/tkt/ or /tkt/, French: [e.ti.

kt]) is a code of behavior that delineates expectations

for social behavior according to contemporary conventional norms within a society, social class, or
group.

The French word tiquette, literally signifying a tag or label, was used in a modern sense in English
around 1750.[1] From the 1500s through the early 1900s, children learned etiquette at school.
Etiquette has chDuring the Enlightenment era, a self-conscious process of the imposition of polite
norms and behaviours became a symbol of being a genteel member of the upper class. Upwardly
mobile middle class bourgeoisie increasingly tried to identify themselves with the elite through their
adopted artistic preferences and their standards of behaviour. They became preoccupied with
precise rules of etiquette, such as when to show emotion, the art of elegant dress and graceful
conversation and how to act courteously, especially with women. Influential in this new discourse
was a series of essays on the nature of politeness in a commercial society, penned by the
philosopher Lord Shaftesbury in the early 18th century. Shaftesbury defined politeness as the art of
being pleasing in company:
'Politeness' may be defined a dext'rous management of our words and actions, whereby we make
other people have better opinion of us and themselves.[3]
Periodicals, such as The Spectator, founded as a daily publication by Joseph Addison and Richard
Steele in 1711, gave regular advice to its readers on how to conform to the etiquette required of a
polite gentleman. Its stated goal was "to enliven morality with wit, and to temper wit with
morality...to bring philosophy out of the closets and libraries, schools and colleges, to dwell in clubs
and assemblies, at tea-tables and coffeehouses" It provided it's readers with educated, topical
talking points, and advice in how to carry on conversations and social interactions in a polite
manner.[4]

The allied notion of 'civility' - referring to a desired social interaction which valued sober and
reasoned debate on matters of interest - also became an important quality for the 'polite classes'.[5]
Established rules and procedures for proper behaviour as well as etiquette conventions, were
outlined by gentleman's clubs, such as Harrington's Rota Club. Periodicals, including The Tatler and
The Spectator, infused politeness into English coffeehouse conversation, as their explicit purpose lay
in the reformation of English manners and morals.[6]


It was Philip Stanhope, 4th Earl of Chesterfield who first used the word 'etiquette' in its modern
meaning, in his Letters to His Son on the Art of Becoming a Man of the World and a Gentleman.[7]
This work comprised over 400 letters written from 1737 or 1738 and continuing until his son's death
in 1768, and were mostly instructive letters on various subjects.[8] The letters were first published
by his son's widow Eugenia Stanhope in 1774. Chesterfield endeavoured to decouple the issue of
manners from conventional morality, arguing that mastery of etiquette was an important weapon
for social advancement. The Letters were full of elegant wisdom and perceptive observation and
deduction. Chesterfield epitomised the restraint of polite 18th-century society, writing, for instance,
in 1748:


"I would heartily wish that you may often be seen to smile, but never heard to laugh while you live.
Frequent and loud laughter is the characteristic of folly and ill-manners; it is the manner in which the
mob express their silly joy at silly things; and they call it being merry. In my mind there is nothing so
illiberal, and so ill-bred, as audible laughter. I am neither of a melancholy nor a cynical disposition,
and am as willing and as apt to be pleased as anybody; but I am sure that since I have had the full
use of my reason nobody has ever heard me laugh."

By the Victorian era, etiquette had developed into an exceptionally complicated system of rules,
governing everything from the proper method for writing letters and using cutlery to the minutely
regulated interactions between different classes and gender.[9]anged and evolved over the years.

Manners is a term usually preceded by the word good or bad to indicate whether or not a behavior
is socially acceptable. Every culture adheres to a different set of manners, although a lot of manners
are crossculturally common. Manners are a subset of social norms which are informally enforced
through self-regulation and social policing and publically performed. They enable human
ultrasociality [10] by imposing self-restraint and compromise on regular, everyday actions.