DEAD STARS by Paz Marquez Benitez THROUGH the open window the air- teeped outdoor pa ed into hi roo!

" quiet#y en$e#opin% hi!" tea#in% into hi $ery thou%ht& E peranza" 'u#i a" the orry !e he had !ade o( #i(e" the year to )o!e e$en now be%in nin% to wei%h down" to )ru h--they #o t )on)retene " di((u ed into (or !#e !e#an)ho#y& The tranqui# !ur!ur o( )on$er ation i ued (ro! the b ri)*-ti#ed azotea where Don 'u#ian and +ar!en were bu y putterin% away a!on% the ro e pot & ,Papa" and when wi## the -#on% tab#e- be ,/ don-t *now yet& A#(redo i not $ery anza want it to be ne0t !onth&, +ar!en i%hed i!patient#y& ,1hy i He i o$er thirty" i he not. And ired waitin%&, et.,

pe)i(i)" but / under tand E per

he not a bit !ore de)ided" / wonder& ti## a ba)he#or2 E peranza !u t be t

,She doe not ee! to be in !u)h o( a hurry either", Don 'u#ian na a##y )o!!ented" whi#e hi ro e )i or bu i#y nipped away& ,How )an a wo!an be in a hurry when the !an doe not hurry her., +ar!en returned" pin)hin% o(( a wor! with a )are(u#" o!ewhat ab ent air& ,Pap a" do you re!e!ber how !u)h in #o$e he wa ., ,/n #o$e. 1ith who!., ,1ith E peranza" o( )our e& He ha not had another #o$e a((air that / * now o(", he aid with %ood-natured )onte!pt& ,1hat / !ean i that at t he be%innin% he wa enthu ia ti)--(#ower " erenade " note " and thin% #i*e that--, A#(redo re!e!bered that period with a wonder not un!i0ed with ha!e& Th at wa #e than (our year a%o& He )ou#d not under tand tho e !onth o ( a %reat hun%er that wa not o( the body nor yet o( the !ind" a )ra$in % that had eized on hi! one quiet ni%ht when the !oon wa abroad and u nder the dapp#ed hadow o( the tree in the p#aza" !an wooed !aid& 1a he bein% )heated by #i(e. 3o$e--he ee!ed to ha$e !i ed it& Or wa the #o$e that other to#d about a !ere (abri)ation o( per(er$id i!a%inatio n" an e0a%%eration o( the )o!!onp#a)e" a %#ori(i)ation o( in ipid !onot onie u)h a !ade up hi #o$e #i(e. 1a #o$e a )o!bination o( )ir)u! t an)e " or heer nati$e )apa)ity o( ou#. /n tho e day #o$e wa " (or hi !" ti## the eterna# puzz#e4 (or #o$e" a he *new it" wa a tran%er to #o$e a he di$ined it !i%ht be& Sittin% quiet#y in hi roo! now" he )ou#d a#!o t re$i$e the re t#e ne o( tho e day " the (ee#in% o( tu!u#tuou ha te" u)h a he *new o we ## in hi boyhood when o!ethin% beauti(u# wa %oin% on o!ewhere and h e wa tryin% to %et there in ti!e to ee& ,Hurry" hurry" or you wi## !i it", o!eone had ee!ed to ur%e in hi ear & So he had a$id#y eized on the hadow o( 3o$e and de#uded hi! e#( (or a #on% whi#e in the way o ( hu!anity (ro! ti!e i!!e!oria#& /n the !eanti!e" he be)a!e $ery !u)h e

n%a%ed to E peranza& 1hy wou#d !en o !i !ana%e their #i$e . Greed" he thou%ht" wa what rui ned o !any& Greed--the de ire to )rowd into a !o!ent a## the en5oy!ent it wi## ho#d" to queeze (ro! the hour a## the e!otion it wi## yie#d& M en )o!!it the! e#$e when but ha#(-!eanin% to do o" a)ri(i)in% po ib #e (uture (u##ne o( e) ta y to the )ra$in% (or i!!ediate e0)ite!ent& Greed--!ort%a%in% the (uture--(or)in% the hand o( Ti!e" or o( 6ate& ,1hat do you thin* happened., a *ed +ar!en" pur uin% her thou%ht& ,/ uppo ed #on%-en%a%ed peop#e are #i*e that4 war! now" )oo# to!orrow& / thin* they are o(tener )oo# than war!& The $ery (a)t that an en%a%e!e nt ha been a##owed to pro#on% it e#( ar%ue a )ertain p#a)idity o( te! pera!ent--or o( a((e)tion--on the part o( either" or both&, Don 'u#ian #o$ed to phi#o ophize& He wa ta#*in% now with an e$ident re#i h in wor d " hi re onant" $ery na a# $oi)e toned down to !ono#o%ue pit)h& ,That pha e you were pea*in% o( i natura# enou%h (or a be%innin%& Be ide " that" a / ee it" wa A#(redo- #a t ra)e with e )apin% youth--, +ar!en #au%hed a#oud at the thou%ht o( her brother- per(e)t phy i)a# r epo e--a#!o t indo#en)e--di turbed in the ro#e u%%e ted by her (ather(i%urati$e #an%ua%e& ,A #a t purt o( hot b#ood", (ini hed the o#d !an&

6ew )ertain#y wou#d )redit A#(redo Sa#azar with hot b#ood& E$en hi (ri end had a!u ed#y dia%no ed hi b#ood a )oo# and thin" )itin% in)ontro $ertib#e e$iden)e& Ta## and #ender" he !o$ed with an indo#ent ea e tha t $er%ed on %ra)e& Under trai%ht re)a#)itrant hair" a thin (a)e with a ati (yin% breadth o( (orehead" #ow" drea!er- eye " and a toni hin% ( re hne o( #ip --indeed A#(redo Sa#azar- appearan)e beto*ened #itt#e o( e0uberant !a )u#inity4 rather a poet with wayward hu!or" a (a tidiou arti t with *een" )#ear brain& He ro e and quiet#y went out o( the hou e& He #in%ered a !o!ent on the tone tep 4 then went down the path haded by i!!ature a)a)ia " throu% h the #itt#e tarred %ate whi)h he #e(t win%in% ba)* and (orth" now ope nin%" now )#o in%" on the %ra$e# road bordered a#on% the (arther ide b y !adre )a)ao hed%e in tardy #a$ender b#oo!& The %ra$e# road narrowed a it #anted up to the hou e on the hi##" who e wide" open por)he he )ou#d %#i!p e throu%h the heat- hri$e##ed ta!a rind in the Martinez yard& Si0 wee* a%o that hou e !eant nothin% to hi! a$e that it wa the Mart inez hou e" rented and o))upied by 'ud%e de# 7a##e and hi (a!i#y& Si0 wee* a%o 'u#ia Sa#a !eant nothin% to hi!4 he did not e$en *now her na !e4 but now-One e$enin% he had %one ,nei%hborin%, with Don 'u#ian4 a rare enou%h o) )urren)e" in)e he !ade it a point to a$oid a## appearan)e o( )urryin% (a$or with the 'ud%e& Thi parti)u#ar e$enin% howe$er" he had a##owed h i! e#( to be per uaded& ,A #itt#e !enta# re#a0ation now and then i ben e(i)ia#", the o#d !an had aid& ,Be ide " a 5ud%e- %ood wi##" you *no

w4, the re t o( the thou%ht--,i --Don 'u#ian )on$eyed throu%h a wor#d#y wi do!&

worth a ri in% youn% #awyer- troub#e, hru% and a !i#e that derided hi own

A youn% wo!an had !et the! at the door& /t wa e$ident (ro! the e0)ite! ent o( the 'ud%e- )hi#dren that he wa a re)ent and $ery we#)o!e arri $a#& /n the )hara)teri ti) 6i#ipino way (or!a# introdu)tion had been o !itted--the 5ud%e #i!itin% hi! e#( to a )a ua# ,Ah" ya e )ono)en.,--wi th the )on equen)e that A#(redo )a##ed her Mi de# 7a##e throu%hout th e e$enin%& He wa puzz#ed that he hou#d !i#e with e$ident de#i%ht e$ery ti!e he addre ed her thu & 3ater Don 'u#ian in(or!ed hi! that he wa not the 'ud%ei ter" a he had uppo ed" but hi i ter-in-#aw" and that her na!e wa 'u#ia Sa#a & A $ery di%ni(ied rather au tere na!e" he thou%ht& Sti##" the youn% #ady hou#d ha$e )orre)ted hi!& A it wa " he wa %rea t#y e!barra ed" and (e#t that he hou#d e0p#ain& To hi apo#o%y" he rep#ied" ,That i nothin%" Ea)h ti!e / wa about to )orre)t you" but / re!e!bered a i!i#ar e0perien)e / had on)e be(ore&, ,Oh", he draw#ed out" $a t#y re#ie$ed& ,A !an na!ed Mana#an%--/ *ept )a##in% hi! Mana#o& A(ter the tenth ti!e or o" the youn% !an ro e (ro! hi eat and aid udden#y" -Pardon !e" but !y na!e i Mana#an%" Mana#an%&- 8ou *now" / ne$er (or%a$e hi!2, He #au%hed with her& ,The be t thin% to do under the )ir)u! tan)e " / ha$e (ound out", he p ur ued" ,i to pretend not to hear" and to #et the other per on (ind ou t hi !i ta*e without he#p&, ,A you did thi ti!e& Sti##" you #oo*ed a!u ed e$ery ti!e /--,

,/ wa

thin*in% o( Mr& Mana#an%&,

Don 'u#ian and hi un)o!!uni)ati$e (riend" the 'ud%e" were ab orbed in a %a!e o( )he & The youn% !an had tired o( p#ayin% appre)iati$e pe)ta tor and de u#tory )on$er ationa#i t" o he and 'u#ia Sa#a had %one o(( to )hat in the $ine-)o$ered por)h& The #one piano in the nei%hborhood a #ternate#y tin*#ed and ban%ed away a the p#ayer- !ood a#tered& He #i tened" and wondered irre#e$ant#y i( Mi Sa#a )ou#d in%4 he had u) h a )har!in% pea*in% $oi)e& He wa !i#d#y urpri ed to note (ro! her appearan)e that he wa un!i t a*ab#y a i ter o( the 'ud%e- wi(e" a#thou%h Do9a Ade#a wa o( a di((e rent type a#to%ether& She wa !a## and p#u!p" with wide brown eye " )# ear#y de(ined eyebrow " and de#i)ate#y !ode#ed hip --a pretty wo!an wit h the )o!p#e0ion o( a baby and the e0pre ion o( a #i*ab#e )ow& 'u#ia w a ta##er" not o ob$iou #y pretty& She had the a!e eyebrow and #ip " but he wa !u)h dar*er" o( a !ooth ri)h brown with under#yin% tone o ( )ri! on whi)h hei%htened the i!pre ion he %a$e o( aboundin% $ita#it y&

On Sunday !ornin% a(ter !a " (ather and on wou#d %o )run)hin% up the %ra$e# road to the hou e on the hi##& The 'ud%e- wi(e in$ariab#y o((er ed the! beer" whi)h Don 'u#ian en5oyed and A#(redo did not& A(ter a ha# ( hour or o" the )he board wou#d be brou%ht out4 then A#(redo and 'u# ia Sa#a wou#d %o out to the por)h to )hat& She at in the #ow ha!!o)* and he in a ro)*in% )hair and the hour --war!" quiet Mar)h hour -- ped by& He en5oyed ta#*in% with her and it wa e$ident that he #i*ed hi ) o!pany4 yet what (ee#in% there wa between the! wa o undi turbed that it ee!ed a !atter o( )our e& On#y when E peranza )han)ed to a * hi! in dire)t#y about tho e $i it did o!e unea ine )reep into hi thou%ht o( the %ir# ne0t door& E peranza had wanted to *now i( he went trai%ht ho!e a(ter !a & A#(re do udden#y rea#ized that (or e$era# Sunday now he had not waited (or E peranza to )o!e out o( the )hur)h a he had been wont to do& He had b een ea%er to %o ,nei%hborin%&, He an wered that he went ho!e to wor*& And" be)au e he wa not habitua# #y untruth(u#" added" ,So!eti!e / %o with Papa to 'ud%e de# 7a##e- &, She dropped the topi)& E peranza wa not prone to indu#%e in unpro$o*ed 5ea#ou ie & She wa a be#ie$er in the re%enerati$e $irtue o( in titutio n " in their power to re%u#ate (ee#in% a we## a )ondu)t& /( a !an wer e !arried" why" o( )our e" he #o$ed hi wi(e4 i( he were en%a%ed" he )o u#d not po ib#y #o$e another wo!an& That ha#(-#ie to#d hi! what he had not ad!itted open#y to hi! e#(" that he wa %i$in% 'u#ia Sa#a o!ethin% whi)h he wa not (ree to %i$e& He r ea#ized that4 yet o!ethin% that wou#d not be denied be)*oned i!periou #y" and he (o##owed on& /t wa o ea y to (or%et up there" away (ro! the pryin% eye o( the wor #d" o ea y and o poi%nant#y weet& The be#o$ed wo!an" he tandin% )#o e to her" the hadow around" en(o#din%& ,Up here / (ind-- o!ethin%--, He and 'u#ia Sa#a tood #oo*in% out into the he quiet ni%ht& Sen in% unwanted inten ity" #au%hed" wo!an-#i*e" a *in%" ,A!u e!ent., ,:o4 youth--it ,Are you o o#d., de ire&, there a poet #ur*in% in the heart o( e$er pirit--,

,And heart-

1a he be)o!in% a poet" or i y !an.

,Down there", he had )ontinued" hi $oi)e o!ewhat indi tin)t" ,the roa d i too broad" too trodden by (eet" too barren o( !y tery&, ,Down there, beyond the an)ient ta!arind #ay the road" upturned to the tar & /n the dar*ne the (ire(#ie %#i!!ered" whi#e an errant breeze trayed in (ro! o!ewhere" brin%in% e#u i$e" (araway ound a o( $oi)e

in a drea!& ,My tery--, ,:ot in he an wered #i%ht#y" ,that i o brie(--,

o!e", qui)*#y& ,:ot in you&, o the !y tery&, ti## not (ind it&,

,8ou ha$e *nown !e a (ew wee* 4 ,/ )ou#d ,So #on%., ,/ hou#d #i*e to&,

tudy you a## !y #i(e and

Tho e i0 wee* were now o wi(t-- ee!in% in the !e!ory" yet had they been o deep in the #i$in%" o )har%ed with )o!pe##in% power and weetn e & Be)au e neither the pa t nor the (uture had re#e$an)e or !eanin%" he #i$ed on#y the pre ent" day by day" #i$ed it inten e#y" with u)h a wi##(u# huttin% out o( (a)t a a tounded hi! in hi )a#!er !o!ent & 'u t be(ore Ho#y 1ee*" Don 'u#ian in$ited the 5ud%e and hi (a!i#y to pend Sunday a(ternoon at Tanda where he had a )o)onut p#antation and a hou e on the bea)h& +ar!en a# o )a!e with her (our ener%eti) )hi#dren& She and Do9a Ade#a pent !o t o( the ti!e indoor dire)tin% the prepara tion o( the !erienda and di )u in% the #i*eab#e ab urditie o( their h u band --how +ar!en- 7i)ente wa o ab orbed in hi (ar! that he wou# d not e$en ta*e ti!e o(( to a))o!pany her on thi $i it to her (ather4 how Do9a Ade#a- Dioni io wa the !o t ab ent!inded o( !en" o!eti!e % oin% out without hi )o##ar" or with un!at)hed o)* & A(ter the !erienda" Don 'u#ian auntered o(( with the 5ud%e to how hi! what a thri$in% youn% )o)onut #oo*ed #i*e--,p#enty o( #ea$e " )#o e e t" ri)h %reen,--whi#e the )hi#dren" )on$oyed by 'u#ia Sa#a " (ound unen din% entertain!ent in the ripp#in% and #e(t by the ebbin% tide& They w ere (ar down" wa#*in% at the ed%e o( the water" indi tin)t#y out#ined a %ain t the %ray o( the out-)ur$in% bea)h& A#(redo #e(t hi per)h on the ba!boo #adder o( the hou e and (o##owed& Here were her (oot tep " narrow" ar)hed& He #au%hed at hi! e#( (or hi b#a)* )an$a (ootwear whi)h he re!o$ed (orthwith and to ed hi%h up on dry and& 1hen he )a!e up" he (#u hed" then !i#ed with (ran* p#ea ure& aid with a que tionin% in(#e)tion& u)h a

,/ hope you are en5oyin% thi ", he ,7ery !u)h& /t #oo* #o$e#y bea)h&,

#i*e ho!e to !e" e0)ept that we do not ha$e

There wa a breeze (ro! the water& /t b#ew the hair away (ro! her (oreh ead" and whipped the tu)*ed-up *irt around her trai%ht" #ender (i%ur e& /n the pi)ture wa o!ethin% o( ea%er (reedo! a o( win% poi ed in (#i%ht& The %ir# had %ra)e" di tin)tion& Her (a)e wa not notab#y prett y4 yet he had a tanta#izin% )har!" a## the !ore )o!pe##in% be)au e it wa an inner qua#ity" an a)hie$e!ent o( the pirit& The #ure wa there"

o( natura#ne " o( an a#ert $ita#ity o( !ind and body" o( a thou%ht(u#" unny te!per" and o( a piquant per$er ene whi)h i au)e to )har!& ,The a(ternoon ha ee!ed $ery hort" ha n-t it., Then" ,Thi " / thin*" i the #a t ti!e--we )an $i it&, ,The #a t. 1hy., ,Oh" you wi## be too bu y perhap &, He noted an e$a i$e qua#ity in the an wer& ,Do / ee! e pe)ia##y indu triou to you.,

,/( you are" you ne$er #oo* it&, ,:ot per pirin% or breath#e ,But--, ,A#way unhurried" too unhurried" and )a#!&, She !i#ed to her e#(& " a a bu y !an ou%ht to be&,

,/ wi h that were true", he She waited& ,A !an i

aid a(ter a !editati$e pau e&

happier i( he i " a

you

ay" )a#! and p#a)id&,

,3i*e a )arabao in a !ud poo#", ,1ho. /., ,Oh" no2, ,8ou aid / a! )a#! and p#a)id&, what / thin*&, o too& Show

he retorted per$er e#y

,That i

,/ u ed to thin*

how #itt#e we *now our e#$e &,

/t wa tran%e to hi! that he )ou#d be wooin% thu ; with tone and #oo* and )o$ert phra e& ,/ hou#d #i*e to ee your ho!e town&, with (ern

,There i nothin% to ee--#itt#e )roo*ed treet " bunut roo( %rowin% on the!" and o!eti!e qua he &,

That wa the ba)*%round& /t !ade her ee! #e deta)hed" #e unre#ate d" yet witha# !ore di tant" a i( that ba)*%round )#ai!ed her and e0)#u ded hi!& ,:othin%. There i you&,

,Oh" !e. But / a! here&,

,/ wi## not %o" o( )our e" unti# you are there&, ,1i## you )o!e. 8ou wi## (ind it du##& There i n-t e$en one A!eri)an th ere2, ,1e##--A!eri)an She #au%hed& ,1e #i$e on +a##e 3uz" a #itt#e ,+ou#d / (ind that., ,/( you don-t a * (or Mi ,/-## inquire about--, ,1hat., ,The hou e o( the prettie t %ir# in the town&, ,There i where you wi## #o e your way&, Then that i not quite in)ere&, ,/t i ", he a$erred #ow#y" but e!phati)a##y& ay u)h thin% &, none other !ore handy / d he turned eriou & ,:ow" de# 7a##e", he !i#ed tea in%#y& treet with tree &, are rather e entia# to !y entertain!ent&,

,/ thou%ht you" at #ea t" wou#d not

,Pretty--pretty--a (oo#i h word2 But there i id not !ean that quite--, ,Are you withdrawin% the )o!p#i!ent., ,Re-en(or)in% it" !aybe& So!ethin% i t i !ore than that when--, ,/( it adden .,

pretty when it p#ea e

the eye--i

he interrupted ha ti#y&

,E0a)t#y&, ,/t !u t be u%#y&, ,A#way ., Toward the we t" the un#i%ht #ay on the di!!in% water ntin% trea!er o( )ri! oned %o#d& ,:o" o( )our e you are ri%ht&, ,1hy did you d ba)*& ay thi i the #a t ti!e., he a *ed quiet#y a they turne in a broad" %#i

,/ a! %oin% ho!e&,

The end o( an i!po

ib#e drea!2 i#en)e&

,1hen., a(ter a #on%

,To!orrow& / re)ei$ed a #etter (ro! 6ather and Mother ye terday& They w ant !e to pend Ho#y 1ee* at ho!e&, She ee!ed to be waitin% (or hi! to the #a t ti!e&, ,+an-t / )o!e to ay %ood-bye., pea*& ,That i why / aid thi i

,Oh" you don-t need to2, ,:o" but / want to&, ,There i no ti!e&,

The %o#den trea!er wa withdrawin%" hortenin%" unti# it #oo*ed no !or e than a poo# (ar away at the ri! o( the wor#d& Sti##ne " a $ibrant qu iet that a((e)t the en e a doe o#e!n har!ony4 a pea)e that i not )ontent!ent but a )e ation o( tu!u#t when a## $io#en)e o( (ee#in% tone down to the wi t(u# erenity o( re%ret& She turned and #oo*ed into hi (a)e" in her dar* eye a %ho t o( un et adne & ,Ho!e ee! o (ar (ro! here& Thi i a#!o t #i*e another #i(e&, tran%e enou%h" / )annot %et rid o(

,/ *now& Thi i E# ewhere" and yet the o#d thin% &, ,O#d thin% .,

,Oh" o#d thin% " !i ta*e " en)u!bran)e " o#d ba%%a%e&, He aid it #i%ht #y" unwi##in% to !ar the hour& He wa#*ed )#o e" hi hand o!eti!e tou) hin% her (or one whir#in% e)ond& Don 'u#ianna a# u!!on )a!e to the! on the wind&

A#(redo %ripped the o(t hand o near hi own& At hi tou)h" the %ir# t urned her (a)e away" but he heard her $oi)e ay $ery #ow" ,Good-bye&, // A36REDO Sa#azar turned to the ri%ht where" (arther on" the road broaden ed and entered the heart o( the town--heart o( +hine e tore he#tered under #ow-hun% roo( " o( indo#ent dru% tore and tai#or hop " o( din% y hoe-repairin% e tab#i h!ent " and a )#uttered %o#d !ith- )ubbyho#e where a )on u!pti$e bent o$er a !a%ni(yin% #en 4 heart o( o#d bri)*-roo (ed hou e with quaint hand-and-ba## *no)*er on the door4 heart o( %ra -%rown p#aza repo e(u# with tree " o( an)ient )hur)h and )on$ento" no w )ir)#ed by wa##ow %#idin% in (#i%ht a !ooth and o(t a the a(ter noon it e#(& /nto the qui)*#y deepenin% twi#i%ht" the $oi)e o( the bi%% e t o( the )hur)h be## *ept rin%in% it in i tent u!!on & 6#o)*in% )a !e the de$out with their #on% wa0 )and#e " youn% wo!en in $i$id appare#

<(or thi wa Ho#y Thur day and the 3ord wa ti## a#i$e=" o#der wo!en in ober b#a)* *irt & +a!e too the youn% !en in dro$e " e#bowin% ea)h other under the ta#i ay tree near the )hur)h door& The %ai#y de)*ed ri) e-paper #antern were a%ain on di p#ay whi#e (ro! the window o( the o# der hou e hun% )o#ored %#a %#obe " heir#oo! (ro! a day when %ra pi th wi)* (#oatin% in )o)onut oi# were the )hie( #i%htin% de$i)e& Soon a doub#e row o( #i%ht e!er%ed (ro! the )hur)h and un)oi#ed down t he #en%th o( the treet #i*e a hu%e 5ewe##ed band tudded with %#itteri n% )#u ter where the aint - p#at(or! were& Abo$e the !ea ured !u i) ro e the untutored $oi)e o( the )hoir" teeped in in)en e and the a)ri d (u!e o( burnin% wa0& The i%ht o( E peranza and her !other edate#y pa)in% behind Our 3ady o ( Sorrow udden#y de troyed the i##u ion o( )ontinuity and bro*e up th o e #ine o( #i%ht into )o!ponent indi$idua# & E peranza ti((ened e#( -)on )iou #y" tried to #oo* unaware" and )ou#d not& The #ine !o$ed on& Sudden#y" A#(redo#ow b#ood be%an to beat $io#ent#y" irre%u#ar#y& A %ir# wa )o!in% down the #ine--a %ir# that wa tri*in%" and $i$id#y a# i$e" the wo!an that )ou#d )au e $io#ent )o!!otion in hi heart" yet had no p#a)e in the )o!p#eted orderin% o( hi #i(e& Her %#an)e o( ab tra)ted de$otion (e## on hi! and )a!e to a brie( top&

The #ine *ept !o$in% on" wendin% it )ir)uitou route away (ro! the )hu r)h and then ba)* a%ain" where" a))ordin% to the o#d pro$erb" a## pro)e ion end& At #a t Our 3ady o( Sorrow entered the )hur)h" and with her the prie t and the )hoir" who e $oi)e now e)hoed (ro! the ar)hed )ei#in%& The be# # ran% the )#o e o( the pro)e ion& A round oran%e !oon" ,hu%e a a winnowin% ba *et", ro e #azi#y into a ) #ear *y" whitenin% the iron roo( and di!!in% the #antern at the wind ow & A#on% the ti## den e#y hadowed treet the youn% wo!en with thei r rear %uard o( !a#e #oitered and" !aybe" too* the #on%e t way ho!e& Toward the end o( the row o( +hine e tore " he )au%ht up with 'u#ia Sa #a & The )rowd had di per ed into the ide treet " #ea$in% +a##e Rea# to tho e who #i$ed (arther out& /t wa pa t ei%ht" and E peranza wou#d be e0pe)tin% hi! in a #itt#e whi#e; yet the thou%ht did not hurry hi! a he aid ,Good e$enin%, and (e## into tep with the %ir#& ,/ had been thin*in% a## thi ti!e that you had %one", he )e that wa both e0)ited and troub#ed& ,:o" !y ,Oh" i ,8e &, i ter a *ed !e to the 'ud%e %oin%., aid in a $oi

tay unti# they are ready to %o&,

The pro$in)ia# do)*et had been )#eared" and 'ud%e de# 7a##e had been a i%ned e# ewhere& A #awyer--and a #o$er--A#(redo had (ound that out # on% be(ore& ,Mr& Sa#azar", , he bro*e into hi i#en)e" ,/ wi h to )on%ratu#ate you& ine$itab#e&

Her tone to#d hi! that ,6or what.,

he had #earned" at #a t& That wa

,6or your approa)hin% weddin%&, So!e e0p#anation wa not o((end. due her" ure#y& 8et what )ou#d he ay that wou#d

,/ hou#d ha$e o((ered )on%ratu#ation #on% be(ore" but you *now !ere $ i itor are #ow about %ettin% the new ", he )ontinued& He #i tened not o !u)h to what he aid a to the nuan)e in her $oi) e& He heard nothin% to en#i%hten hi!" e0)ept that he had re$erted to t he (or!a# tone o( ear#y a)quaintan)e& :o re$e#ation there4 i!p#y the o#d $oi)e--)oo#" a#!o t deta)hed (ro! per ona#ity" (#e0ib#e and $ibran t" u%%e tin% potentia#itie o( on%& ,Are weddin% intere tin% to you., he (ina##y brou%ht out quiet#y

,1hen they are o( (riend " ye &, ,1ou#d you )o!e i( / a *ed you., ,1hen i it %oin% to be.,

,May", he rep#ied brie(#y" a(ter a #on% pau e& ,May i the !onth o( happine hi! a hade o( irony& ,They ay", they ay", he aid" with what ee!ed to

#ow#y" indi((erent#y& ,1ou#d you )o!e.,

,1hy not., ,:o rea on& / a! 5u t a *in%& Then you wi##., ,/( you wi## a * !e", ,Then / a * you&, ,Then / wi## be there&, The %ra$e# road #ay be(ore the!4 at the road- end the #i%hted window o( the hou e on the hi##& There wept o$er the pirit o( A#(redo Sa#aza r a #on%in% o *een that it wa pain" a wi h that" that hou e were hi " that a## the bewi#der!ent o( the pre ent were not" and that thi wo!an by hi ide were hi #on% wedded wi(e" returnin% with hi! to the pea)e he aid with di dain&

o( ho!e& ,'u#ita", he aid in hi #ow" thou%ht(u# !anner" ,did you e$er ha$e to )hoo e between o!ethin% you wanted to do and o!ethin% you had to do., ,:o2, ,/ thou%ht !aybe you had had that e0perien)e4 then you )ou#d under tand a !an who wa in u)h a ituation&, ,8ou are (ortunate", he pur ued when ,/ --i thi !an ure o( what he he did not an wer&

hou#d do.,

,/ don-t *now" e )ape u and en it i (oo#i %er depend on

'u#ita& Perhap not& But there i a point where a thin% ru he downward o( it own wei%ht" dra%%in% u a#on%& Th h to a * whether one wi## or wi## not" be)au e it no #on hi!&,

,But then why--why--, her !u((#ed $oi)e )a!e& ,Oh" what do / *now. That i hi prob#e! a(ter a##&, ,Doe n-t it--intere t you., ,1hy !u t it. /--/ ha$e to e&, 1ithout #i(tin% her eye ay %ood-bye" Mr& Sa#azar4 we are at the hou

he qui)*#y turned and wa#*ed away&

Had the (ina# word been aid. He wondered& /t had& 8et a (eeb#e (#utter o( hope tre!b#ed in hi !ind thou%h et a%ain t that hope were three ye ar o( en%a%e!ent" a $ery near weddin%" per(e)t under tandin% between t he parent " hi own )on )ien)e" and E peranza her e#(--E peranza waitin %" E peranza no #on%er youn%" E peranza the e((i)ient" the #itera#-!ind ed" the inten e#y a)qui iti$e& He #oo*ed attenti$e#y at her where he at on the o(a" apprai in%#y" a nd with a *ind o( a$er ion whi)h he tried to )ontro#& She wa one o( tho e (ortunate wo!en who ha$e the %i(t o( uni(or!#y a)) eptab#e appearan)e& She ne$er urpri ed one with une0pe)ted ho!e#ine nor with tart#in% re er$e o( beauty& At ho!e" in )hur)h" on the tree t" he wa a#way her e#(" a wo!an pa t (ir t b#oo!" #i%ht and )#ear o( )o!p#e0ion" pare o( ar! and o( brea t" with a #i%ht )on$e0ity to thi n throat4 a wo!an dre ed with e#(-)on )iou )are" e$en e#e%an)e4 a wo !an di tin)t#y not a$era%e& She wa pur uin% an indi%nant re#ation about o!ethin% or other" o!eth in% about +a#i0ta" their note-)arrier" A#(redo per)ei$ed" o he !ere#y ha#(-#i tened" under tandin% i!per(e)t#y& At a pau e he draw#ed out to (i## in the %ap; ,1e##" what o( it., The re!ar* ounded ruder than he h ad intended& ,She i not !arried to hi!", E peranza in i ted in her thin" ner$ou #y pit)hed $oi)e& ,Be ide " he hou#d ha$e thou%ht o( u & :anay pra)ti)a#

#y brou%ht her up& 1e ne$er thou%ht

he wou#d turn out bad&,

1hat had +a#i0ta done. Ho!e#y" !idd#e-a%ed +a#i0ta. ,8ou are $ery po iti$e about her badne a wa a#way po iti$e& ,But do you appro$e., ,O( what., ,1hat he did&, ", he )o!!ented dry#y& E peranz

,:o", indi((erent#y& ,1e##., He wa udden#y i!pe##ed by a de ire to di turb the un$e0ed orthodo0y o ( her !ind& ,A## / ay i that it i not ne)e ari#y wi)*ed&, ,1hy hou#dn-t it be. 8ou ta#*ed #i*e an--i!!ora# !an& / did not *now t hat your idea were #i*e that&, ,My idea ., he retorted" %oaded by a deep" a))u!u#ated e0a peration& ,T he on#y te t / wi h to app#y to )ondu)t i the te t o( (airne & A! / i n5urin% anybody. :o. Then / a! 5u ti(ied in !y )on )ien)e& / a! ri%ht& 3i$in% with a !an to who! he i not !arried--i that it. /t !ay be wro n%" and a%ain it !ay not&, ,She ha nt!ent& in5ured u & She wa un%rate(u#&, Her $oi)e wa that you are--, he ti%ht with re e topped" appa##

,The troub#e with you" E peranza" i ed by the pa ion in hi $oi)e&

,1hy do you %et an%ry. / do not under tand you at a##2 / thin* / *now w hy you ha$e been indi((erent to !e #ate#y& / a! not b#ind" or dea(4 / ee and hear what perhap o!e are tryin% to *eep (ro! !e&, The b#ood u r%ed into hi $ery eye and hi hearin% harpened to point o( a)ute pa in& 1hat wou#d he ay ne0t. ,1hy don-t you pea* out (ran*#y be(ore it i too #ate. 8ou need not th in* o( !e and o( what peop#e wi## ay&, Her $oi)e tre!b#ed& A#(redo wa u((erin% a he )ou#d not re!e!ber e$er ha$in% u((ered be( ore& 1hat peop#e wi## ay--what wi## they not ay. 1hat don-t they ay when #on% en%a%e!ent are bro*en a#!o t on the e$e o( the weddin%. ,8e ", he aid he itatin%#y" di((ident#y" a i( !ere#y thin*in% a#oud" ,one trie to be (air--a))ordin% to hi #i%ht --but it i hard& One wou #d #i*e to be (air to onee#( (ir t& But that i too ea y" one doe not dare--, ,1hat do you !ean., he a *ed with repre ed $io#en)e& ,1hate$er !y ho rt)o!in% " and no doubt they are !any in your eye " / ha$e ne$er %one o

ut o( !y way" o( !y p#a)e" to (ind a !an&, Did he !ean by thi irre#e$ant re!ar* that he it wa r4 or wa that a )o$ert atta)* on 'u#ia Sa#a . who had ou%ht he

,E peranza--, a de perate p#ea #ay in hi tu!b#in% word & ,/( you-- up po e /--, 8et how )ou#d a !ere !an word u)h a p#ea. ,/( you !ean you want to ta*e ba)* your word" i( you are tired o(--why don-t you te## !e you are tired o( !e., he bur t out in a tor! o( wee pin% that #e(t hi! )o!p#ete#y ha!ed and unner$ed& The #a t word had been /// AS A#(redo Sa#azar #eaned a%ain t the boat rai# to wat)h the e$enin% e tt#in% o$er the #a*e" he wondered i( E peranza wou#d attribute any i%n i(i)an)e to thi trip o( hi & He wa uppo ed to be in Sta& +ruz whithe r the )a e o( the Peop#e o( the Phi#ippine / #and $ & Be#ina et a# had *ept hi!" and there he wou#d ha$e been i( Bri%ida Sa!uy had not been o i!portant to the de(en e& He had to (ind that e#u i$e o#d wo!an& That t he ear)h wa #eadin% hi! to that parti)u#ar #a*e town whi)h wa 'u#ia Sa#a - ho!e hou#d not di turb hi! undu#y 8et he wa di turbed to a de% ree utter#y out o( proportion to the pro ai)a#ne o( hi errand& That inner tu!u#t wa no urpri e to hi!4 in the #a t ei%ht year he had be) o!e u ed to u)h o))a iona# tor! & He had #on% rea#ized that he )ou#d not (or%et 'u#ia Sa#a & Sti##" he had tried to be )ontent and not to re !e!ber too !u)h& The )#i!ber o( !ountain who ha *nown the ba)*-brea*" the #one o!ene " and the )hi##" (ind a )ertain re t(u#ne in #e$e# p ath !ade ea y to hi (eet& He #oo* up o!eti!e (ro! the $a##ey where ett#e the du * o( e$enin%" but he *now he !u t not heed the radiant be)*onin%& Maybe" in ti!e" he wou#d )ea e e$en to #oo* up& He wa not unhappy in hi !arria%e& He (e#t no rebe##ion; on#y the )a#! o( )apitu#ation to what he re)o%nized a irre i tib#e (or)e o( )ir)u! tan)e and o( )hara)ter& Hi #i(e had i!p#y ordered it e#(4 no !ore tr u%%#e " no !ore tirrin% up o( e!otion that %ot a !an nowhere& 6ro! hi )apa)ity o( )o!p#ete deta)h!ent he deri$ed a tran%e o#a)e& The e e ntia# hi! e#(" the hi! e#( that had it bein% in the )ore o( hi thou%h t" wou#d" he re(#e)ted" a#way be (ree and a#one& 1hen )#ai! en)roa)he d too in i tent#y" a o!eti!e they did" he retreated into the inner ( a tne " and (ro! that $anta%e he aw thin% and peop#e around hi! a r e!ote and a#ien" a in)ident that did not !atter& At u)h ti!e did E peranza (ee# ba((#ed and he#p#e 4 he wa %ent#e" e$en tender" but i!!e a urab#y (ar away" beyond her rea)h& 3i%ht were prin%in% into #i(e on the hore& That wa the town" a #itt #e up-ti#ted town ne t#in% in the dar* %reenne o( the %ro$e & A nub) re ted be#(ry tood be ide the an)ient )hur)h& On the out *irt the e$e nin% !ud%e %#owed red throu%h the inuou !i t o( !o*e that ro e an d #o t the! e#$e in the purp#e hadow o( the hi## & There wa a youn% !oon whi)h %rew #ow#y #u!inou a the )ora# tint in the *y yie#ded t o the dar*er b#ue o( e$enin%& aid&

The $e e# approa)hed the #andin% quiet#y" trai#in% a wa*e o( #on% %o#d en ripp#e on the dar* water& Pe)u#iar hi## in(#e)tion )a!e to hi ear (ro! the )rowd a e!b#ed to !eet the boat-- #ow" in%in% )aden)e " )h ara)teri ti) o( the 3a%una #a*e- hore pee)h& 6ro! where he tood he )o u#d not di tin%ui h (a)e " o he had no way o( *nowin% whether the pre idente wa there to !eet hi! or not& 'u t then a $oi)e houted& ,/ the abo%ado there. Abo%ado2, o!eone irate#y a *ed&

,1hat abo%ado.,

That !u t be the pre idente" he thou%ht" and went down to the #andin%& /t wa a po#i)e!an" a ta## po)*-!ar*ed indi$idua#& The pre idente had # e(t with Bri%ida Sa!uy--Tandan% ,Binday,--that noon (or Santa +ruz& Se9 or Sa#azare)ond #etter had arri$ed #ate" but the wi(e had read it a nd aid" ,Go and !eet the abo%ado and in$ite hi! to our hou e&, A#(redo Sa#azar )ourteou #y de)#ined the in$itation& He wou#d #eep on board in)e the boat wou#d #ea$e at (our the ne0t !ornin% anyway& So th e pre idente had re)ei$ed hi (ir t #etter. A#(redo did not *now be)au e that o((i)ia# had not ent an an wer& ,8e ", the po#i)e!an rep#ied" , but he )ou#d not write be)au e we heard that Tandan% Binday wa in San Antonio o we went there to (ind her&, San Antonio wa up in the hi## 2 Good !an" the pre idente2 He" A#(redo" !u t do o!ethin% (or hi!& /t wa not e$ery day that one !et with u)h wi##in%ne to he#p& Ei%ht o-)#o)*" #u%ubriou #y to##ed (ro! the be## tower" (ound the boat ett#ed into a o!no#ent quiet& A )ot had been brou%ht out and pread ( or hi!" but it wa too bare to be in$itin% at that hour& /t wa too ear #y to #eep; he wou#d wa#* around the town& Hi heart beat (a ter a he pi)*ed hi way to hore o$er the ra(t !ade (a t to undry pi#e dri$en into the water& How pea)e(u# the town wa 2 Here and there a #itt#e tienda wa ti## ope n" it di! #i%ht i uin% (or#orn#y throu%h the in%#e window whi)h er$ ed a )ounter& An o))a iona# )oup#e auntered by" the wo!en- )hine#a !a*in% )rapin% ound & 6ro! a di tan)e )a!e the hri## $oi)e o( )hi#d ren p#ayin% %a!e on the treet--tubi%an perhap " or ,haw*-and-)hi)*en& , The thou%ht o( 'u#ia Sa#a in that quiet p#a)e (i##ed hi! with a pity in% adne & How wou#d #i(e ee! now i( he had !arried 'u#ia Sa#a . Had he !eant any thin% to her. That un(or%ettab#e red-and-%o#d a(ternoon in ear#y Apri# haunted hi! with a en e o( in)o!p#etene a re t#e a other un#aid %ho t & She had not !arried--why. 6aith(u#ne " he re(#e)ted" wa not a )on )iou e((ort at re%ret(u# !e!ory& /t wa o!ethin% un$o#itiona#" !a ybe a re)urrent awarene o( irrep#a)eabi#ity& /rre#e$ant tri(#e --a )o o# wind on hi (orehead" (ar-away ound a o( $oi)e in a drea!--at ti !e !o$ed hi! to an odd#y irre i tib#e i!pu# e to #i ten a to an in i tent" un(ini hed prayer&

A (ew inquirie #ed hi! to a )ertain #itt#e tree-)ei#in%ed treet where the youn% !oon wo$e indi tin)t (i#i%ree o( (i%ht and hadow& /n the %a rden the )otton tree threw it an%u#ar hadow athwart the #ow tone wa ##4 and in the )oo#" ti##y !idni%ht the )o)*- (ir t )a## ro e in ta# #" oarin% 5et o( ound& +a##e 3uz& So!ehow or other" he had *nown that he wou#d (ind her hou e be)au wou#d ure#y be ittin% at the window& 1here e# e" be(ore bedti!e !oon#it ni%ht. The hou e wa #ow and the #i%ht in the a#a behind hrew her head into un!i ta*ab#e re#ie(& He en ed rather than aw tart o( $i$id urpri e& ,Good e$enin%", he aid" rai in% hi hat& e he on a her t her

,Good e$enin%& Oh2 Are you in town., ,On o!e #itt#e bu ine aint& ,1on-t you )o!e up., He )on idered& Hi $a%ue p#an had not in)#uded thi & But 'u#ia Sa#a h ad #e(t the window" )a##in% to her !other a he did o& A(ter a whi#e" o!eone )a!e down tair with a #i%hted )and#e to open the door& At #a t --he wa ha*in% her hand& She had not )han%ed !u)h--a #itt#e #e #ender" not o ea%er#y a#i$e" yet o!ethin% had %one& He !i ed it" ittin% oppo ite her" #oo*in% tho u%ht(u##y into her (ine dar* eye & She a *ed hi! about the ho!e town" a bout thi and that" in a ober" o!ewhat !editati$e tone& He )on$er ed with in)rea in% ea e" thou%h with a %rowin% wonder that he hou#d be th ere at a##& He )ou#d not ta*e hi eye (ro! her (a)e& 1hat had he #o t. Or wa the #o hi . He (e#t an i!per ona# )urio ity )reepin% into h i %aze& The %ir# !u t ha$e noti)ed" (or her )hee* dar*ened in a b#u h& Gent#y--wa it e0peri!enta##y.--he pre ed her hand at partin%4 but hi own (e#t undi turbed and e!otion#e & Did he ti## )are. The an wer to the que tion hard#y intere ted hi!& The youn% !oon had et" and (ro! the unin$itin% )ot he )ou#d #( o( a tar- tudded *y& So that wa a## o$er& ee one ha ", he an wered with a (ee#in% o( pain(u# )on tr

1hy had he ob tinate#y )#un% to that drea!. So a## the e year -- in)e when.--he had been eein% the #i%ht o( dead tar " #on% e0tin%ui hed" yet ee!in%#y ti## in their appointed p#a)e in the hea$en & An i!!en e adne a o( #o in$aded hi pirit" a $a t ho!e i)*ne ( or o!e i!!utab#e re(u%e o( the heart (ar away where (aded %arden b#oo ! a%ain" and where #i$e on in un)han%in% (re hne " the dear" dead #o$e o( $ani hed youth&