Benefits Of Early Marriage And Its Islamic View

June 3, 2010 Teenagers are these days getting into marriage at an early age. They prefer to venture on their own, set up families and manage their own affairs, without depending upon their parents. This trend may turn out to be positive in some cases, although many feel that early marriage has its own set of problems. Early marriage does benefit teenagers and young adults in many ways. They may not be all that mature to cope up with responsibilities, but together as a couple they can resolve many of their problems. Early Marriage Benefits Emotional support Often teenagers are forced to leave their homes or are neglected at the home front. They find a partner with whom they can share their woes and difficulties. Their emotional needs are met when they live together. Financial support Both the young adults are often earning members and they can help themselves in case they are forced to leave their homes. They start working at an early marriage to sustain themselves and together they have ample income to run their household. More independence Away from home, the youngsters are able to lead a life of their own. They make their own decisions about what is good for them. They become self sufficient financially and emotionally. Learn to shoulder responsibilities at an early age Many teenagers at home may perhaps not be so responsible as their parents may take care of everything. On the other hand, those who set up their own homes need to be responsible as they have to manage their affairs. An escape from poor parenting skills Some teenagers may face a lot of problems at home, as their parents may not be understanding and caring. In fact, they may be emotionally and physically abused by their parents. By living on their own, they escape from this hostile environment. Easy to adjust Youngsters are able to adjust with each other very easily. In many Asian countries, girls are married off early as parents feel they will be able to adjust quickly with the other family. Young people who are into a relationship often prefer to solemnize their relationship. They prefer to get married as they feel they now know each other better and marriage will ensure that they stay together forever. They feel they are made for each other and marriage is a way out for them. Also, marriage helps them to be independent of parents, who perhaps may not be taking good care of them.

Early marriage has its own set of problems. Teenagers may prefer to tie the knot despite perhaps parental objections, but they need to know what is in store for them before taking such a decision. The institution of marriage has been given tremendous importance in Islam. Generally, in the terms of jurisprudence it is highly recommended, but in many cases due to extraordinary circumstances, it becomes obligatory and a religious duty. For instance, marriage becoming obligatory when there is a chance of adultery or any other similar sin. The Holy Prophet (SAW) said, The best people of my Umma are those who get married and have chosen their wives and the worst people of my nation are those who have kept away from marriage and are passing their lives as bachelors. (Mustadrakul Wasail by Muhaddith Noori, Vol 2, Pg 531). As one matures physically, sexual desires develop in the individual and gradually both girls and boys start getting attracted to each other, which slowly develops into some sort of psychological pressure. This natural and undirected emotion gradually seeks solace in whatever form possible. Unfortunately, more often than not, it results in the youngsters deviating from the right path and indulging in some unwanted and undesired habits. Before becoming victims of ill-directed lust, it is better for them to get married and settle down. Therefore, the leaders of Islam have advised their followers to follow this most important Sunnah. As the Holy Prophet (SAW) states: O youths, whosoever among you can marry, he should do so because marriage protects your eyes (from indulging in sin by looking lustfully at others in privacy. (Makaarimul Akhlaq). Imam Sadiq (AS) narrates that one day the Holy Prophet (SAW) went on the pulpit and said, O people, Jibraeel has brought unto me a divine command stating that girls are like fruits from a tree. If they are not plucked in time then they get rotten by the rays of the sun and a slight blow of the wind will result in their falling down from the tree. Similarly, when girls attain maturity, then like other women they develop emotions related to sex and there is no cure for it except her husband. If they are not married, prevention of character corruption becomes a remote possibility because after all they are human beings and no human is free from vice. (Furoo-e-Kafi, Vol 5, Pg 337). In yet another tradition from Mustadrakul Wasail it is narrated that When a youngster marries early in his youth, Shaitaan cries out of desperation and says, Alas! This person has protected one third of his religion, now he will protect the remaining two thirds also. Imam Sadiq (as) narrates from the Holy Prophet (S.A.W.) that he said, Those believers who marry, protect half of their religion from danger. In yet another tradition, Imam Sadiq (as) says, Two Rakas of a married person is better than seventy Rakas of an unmarried one. (Wasailush Shia, Vol 5, Pg 1)

The Holy Prophet (S.A.W.) once said, Whoever marries, protects half of his religion, then for the remaining half he must only fear God. (Laalil Akhbar). The sixth Imam, Imam Sadiq (as) says, A sleeping married man is better than a fasting unmarried man. (Laalil Akhbar). The Messenger of Islam (S.A.W.) said, Do not marry a woman for the following four reasons: Wealth, beauty, ancestry and lust. It is obligatory upon you to marry a woman on account of her religion. (Jaame ul Akhbar). In yet another tradition, the Messenger of Islam (S.A.W.) has prohibited his followers from marrying a beautiful woman from a disgraceful background. (Bihar ul Anwar, Vol 23, Pg 54). To get a good, modest and chaste spouse is among the good fortunes of a person according to the leaders of Islam and is also considered as one of the sources by which the religion of a person can be protected. They have conveyed this message quite often that the worship of a married person is much more significant and important before Allah than that of a bachelor or a spinster.

The Holy Prophet (S.A.W.) says: Among the good fortunes of a man is to have a good wife. (Furoo e-Kafi, Vol. 5, Pg. 327).

Article by: Mr. Hakim Ruba http://hakeemruba.com http://www.facebook.com/hakeemruba hakeem@hakeemruba.com http://oasiskerala.wordpress.com/2010/06/03/benefits-of-early-marriage-and-its-islamic-view/

How Islam Views Early Marriages

In the Name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful. All praise and thanks are due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon His Messenger. Thank you brother for your question and eagerness to know the rulings of Islam.

In fact, Islam highly appreciates marriage and gives it due care stating detailed rules and ruling inevery single and small matter.

As for the question of marriage and the proper age of the girl, Islam considers the interests and wellbeing of the spouses. So, Islam doesnt impose a specific age for eligibility for marriage and leaves it for the legal authorities to decide the proper age for marriage in order to maintain interests of both husbands and wives. This, of course, changes from one country or community to anther depending on many considerable factors. .

Responding to your question, Dr. Hatem Al-Hajj, Dean of Shari`ah Academy of America, stated, All praise be to Allah and may His blessings and peace be on His last messenger, Muhammad. As for the verse you mentioned, even though some scholars understood it to mean that a female child may be married off, it is not explicit on this meaning. There are many women who dont get their period until they are fifteen or sixteen, and they would not be considered sick. Some women may even not menstruate until later (as in the many cases of primary amenorrhea,) so it is not about menstruation, but the physique. It would be unreasonable to prevent a twenty two year old female from marriage because she didnt have a period yet.

As for forcing women into marriage, generally speaking, a woman, whether previously married or not, will not be forced into marriage by anyone without her consent, even if it is a father.

The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said: The previously-married woman (al-ayem) has more entitlement to herself than her guardian, and the virgin should be asked for permission (concerning her marriage). (Muslim) In another report by him, and the virgins father should ask for her permission. So, even the father has to seek her permission.If the father married her off without her permission to someone she later didnt like, then she may ask for annulment by the court. Al-Bukhari narrated that Khansa bint Khidhaam complained to the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) that she was previously married, and when she became single, her father married her off, and she did not like that. He (peace and blessings be upon him) annulled the marriage.

Also, Abu Dawud reported from Ibn Abbas (may Allah be pleased with him) a similar case, this time with a virgin, who came to the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) and told him that her father married her off against her will. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) gave her the choice (to stay in the marriage or end it).

As for marrying a little girl, not yet mature to object, without her consent, there is a difference between the contract of marriage and the consummation. As for the contract, aside from Ibn Shubrumah and al-Asamm who prohibited it, the vast majority indicated that it may be done by a father only, as in the case of the presence of a suitor that he fears may pass her up. (Keep in mind the different cultures, eras of history, locationsetc.)

This was allowed for a father (according to some a grandfather as well) due to his compassion and protectiveness of his children. This was certainly not allowed for uncles or others.

As for the consummation of marriage with a young female, the scholars agreed that the groom shall not be permitted to enter in on the bride until she is ready for intercourse.

In al-Mughni, Ibn Qudamah said that her family should not permit him to consummate the marriage if she was not physically capable of intercourse, even if she was nine. He added that if they asked him to take her, he may refuse and he shall not be required to sustain her as a wife until she is physically mature.

The same has been echoed by the three other madhahib (juristic schools), which all indicated that the groom shall not be allowed to move in with her until she is physically capable of conjugal relations; something that should be left for the experts to determine.

Getting married young is the prescription of the prophet for some of the toughest challenges that face the youth and have an enormous impact on the well-being of the society; he (peace and blessings be upon him) said: "O young people! Let those of you who afford marriage get married as it will help them lower their gaze and protect their chastity. And for those who don't afford it, they may fast for it will curb the sexual desire." (Al-Bukhari and Muslim from Ibn Masud)

However, the definition of "early" itself varies according to the circumstances. Notice that the hadith says, who afford marriage which is to afford it in every regard.

In all nations, people got married earlier than they do now. In Europe, during the time of Shakespeare, if a woman was single at 13, she was considered late to marriage, as reflected in his writings.

An eighteen year old during the time of the Prophet led armies, was dispatched as an ambassador, and ruled a city of the importance of Maccah. Would you trust an eighteen year old to do that nowadays? Having a family is not a small task, and it requires a certain degree of maturity.

Islam doesnt legislate for you, in the 21st century, in the west alone, but for Bedouins in the desert and people in the middle of the forests of Africa, Asia, or Latin America; for the 21st century, and the seventh, and in between and beyond.

Permitting a practice is not like requiring it; it is to afford people more flexibility so that they may exercise logical discretion within their various norms and needs. In fact, the scholars, like imam AshShafii, who indicated that marrying a young girl off by her father is permissible, still said that it was detested.

Finally, prudent thinkers never approach an issue of this complexity by looking at it from one angle. They address all the pertinent factors, and they consider all contexts. To judge an act as good or bad, according to reasonable people regardless of their faith and religion, is not an abstract that is separate from its context and the circumstances that surrounded it.

The change, in peoples norms and customs, of the age of marriage, no one can deny, as that happens in all nations. The State of California in the United States increased the age that allows one to legally have sexual intercourse many times within only a 25 year time bracket. Until 1889 the legal age for sexual intercourse was 10 years old, then it became 14 years, then 16 years in 1897, then in 1913 it became 18 years. However, until today it is still 13 years old in the State of New Mexico and 14 years old in the States of Mississippi and Iowa.

Comprehend, may Allah forgive you and me, regarding the above, that this is a single nation during a single era. What about different nations in different eras with different environments, conditions, needs, norms and customs?

The recent extensive changes in the circumstances of the world have led to great changes in peoples customs and norms. It is unfair and unwise for the people of this era to judge human history based on their current standards and norms.

Allah Almighty knows best.

http://www.onislam.net/english/ask-the-scholar/family/marriage/451654-how-islam-views-earlymarriages.html

Marriage at an early age

It is certainly possible for a father to get his daughter married to someone who he thinks is suitable for her. Whether he should force her into any marriage is something totally different Let me relate this to you: A woman companion of the Prophet came to him and said: "My father has married me away to one of his relatives without asking my opinion. I do not wish to stay with this man as his wife." The Prophet ordered their separation. When she realized that she was free and that she was no longer married to the man, she said to the Prophet: "I now accept what my father has done and I am marrying this man. I only did this so that women may know that it is not up to men to marry them away against their wishes."

Scholars have discussed at length the marriage of a young girl who has not attained puberty and whether her father may marry her away without her permission. If such a marriage takes place it is valid. However, it is perhaps best if the marriage is not allowed to be consummated until the girl attains puberty, when she is given the choice whether to continue with this marriage or not. Moreover her father may not marry her away to someone who is of a lesser status than hers. If he does and she objects, the marriage is not valid. Generally speaking, however. a girl must be asked to express her opinion in any proposed marriage. If she has been married before, then her verbal consent should be requested. If she has not been married previously, then her consent is also to be requested, but if she keeps quiet, her silence is taken as approval.

To say that the marriage is valid is not to say that people should go ahead and make such marriages. There may be certain circumstances, which make it desirable or advisable that a very young girl should be married away in this manner but this must not be taken as the normal situation. In marriage, the normal thing is that people should marry when they are of marriageable age. That does not include girls of nine or ten years of age, although some girls may attain puberty that early. Marriage involves certain responsibilities and a very young girl could not be expected to shoulder these. There are also other problems, which the may face, as she grows older. If things go wrong with her marriage, she will always blame her father for having messed up her life, well intentioned though he may be. If you take the example of your own daughter, and you force her to go and live with her husband despite her protestations, you will never be sure whether the marriage will work out well or not. If it does, then well and good. But there is an equal chance that problems may arise especially with your daughter behaving like the child she is. While her husband expects from her the attitude of a married woman. How could you expect her to overcome the feeling that she has been thrown into this situation without being allowed the slightest say in the whole matter which is to affect the rest of her life?

As we see it, your choice is either to get her divorced now, before the marriage is consummated or to keep her with you until she has attained puberty and she is in a position to express her opinion about this marriage. If she still objects to it, then you divorce her without any compulsion to go through with it. If, on the other hand, if she approves of this marriage, at that time, then you go

ahead with it. Perhaps it is better for you to consult with the young man to whom you have already married her. He should be understanding and accommodating. Between the two of you should work out the best solution which ensures that he is not lumbered with marriage which is forced on a young girl who cannot be expected to give an opinion about such a matter. AUGUST 1998/ RABBI UL AKHIR 1419H BY ADIL SALAHI http://www.islamicvoice.com/august.98/marriage.htm